#simon is so edgy but in a good way

[flipsbubble]

just watched dinner in america... haven't watched a romance movie this good in months i swear. my life has a new meaning now omg.

they both matched each other's freak they're what i would call twin flames and i'm not even familiarized with this term like i just feel like THAT'S what true love is

simon crying when patty was singing??? him sending her letters and pictures back??? oh YEAAHH

[celestialprincesse]

to celebrate cancer free, how about a picnic with simon? but he’s letting his paranoia get to him and you have to comfort him that the man feeding the ducks aren’t spying on them and simply…living?

Katz my baby 💕 giving me all the good ideas🎀

AFAB Reader💕🩰

It's impossible not to laugh at Simon as he lugs the overfilled picnic basket across the park, his hulking form and grumpy demenour so at odds with you and your floral sundress, the pink gingham picnic blanket you carry.

The park bustles pleasantly with those stepping out to celebrate the first real days of the English summertime; groups of mothers with their children and couples with the same idea as you, bottles of fizz poured into paper cups and packs of buscuits shared between them. You manage to find a spot with sunlight dappled perfectly by the leaves of an old oak, setting down your picnic blanket, followed by Simon setting down the wicker basket you'd insisted on bringing despite the inconvenience of it. You're perfectly content as you lay in your little quiet place, listening absently to birdsong and laughter, breathing in the fresh air, cut grass and daisies wafting up and making you sigh with bliss.

Unlike you, Simon doesn't have the capability to relax. He doesn't have an off switch. He's very much aware of the lows to which men like him will stoop - seen them firsthand with his family. It's impossible to shake that residual stress, that fear of being out in the open, (relatively) unarmed, with the person he loves more than life itself. "You're all," You snap Simon from his reverie as you attempt to mimic his edginess, bunching your shoulders to your ears and straightening your spine. "Sorry." He mutters apologetically, perpetually worried about runing your sunny days with the inevitable dark cloud that is his paranioa. "Don't apologise." You hum, shifting so your knees press into the blanketed ground, hands coming around his shoulders, ear resting against the centre of his back where you listen to the steady thumping of his heart. The way he settles into your arms doesn't go unnoticed, lets you guide him gently back intil you're both laying beside one another, his head settled on your stomach, letting your fingers card softly through his hair. He allows himself to relax until his breathing matches the soft flutter of your inhales, looping his fingers through yours as he remembers how to shed his armour - to push Ghost down into the far deep crevaces of his brain, refusing his request to make an appearance on such a lovely day. Ghost doesn't get to feel the sun on his skin and the touch of a beautiful woman. That's for Simon. You're for Simon.

Once you're sure he's suitably relaxed, you shimmy from Simon's grip, not missing the frustrated grunt he gives from the loss of his favourite pillow. You soon halt his grumbling when you unwrap some scones from a cloth napkin, procuring little tubs of jam and cream from your basket too.

You spend the afternoon pink cheeked and happy, sipping at little glass bottles of lemonade and snacking on punnets of fruit or little baked treats you'd whipped up the evening before, revelling in domestic bliss and wondering if perhaps one day you'd be doing this not only with you and Simon, maybe a sweet rescue dog too, and a baby on your hip. You have been feeling a little nauseous lately.

𐦍༘⋆

I love babies and cute domestic shit!!! lovelovelove!! this page is not safe for pregancy trope haters!!! this is a domestic bliss safezone!!

[myossdeux]

LOVE THE FACT that in the french localization of Apollo Justice Trilogy they called Simon Blackquill "Jack Lamenoire", I find this choice so damn funny and accurate

As you already know, in the english version he's basically named after the game "Simon says" since he's a prosecutor who likes to manipulate the witnesses. And "black quill" like the main large feathers from birds' tails/wings, in reference to his bird Taka, and his own black and white color palette.

Well, the equivalent of "Simon says" in french is "Jacques a dit" but I guess they decided to go for Jack instead of Jacques because it's a more stylish way to write and pronounce this name. In France, Jacques is a very old name, and it doesn't really fit the appearance and personality of the character. Then "Lamenoire" can have 2 meanings: You can read it as "lame noire" (a black blade, because y'know, he's a samurai wearing black) or "l'âme noire" (a black/dark soul, to accentuate his edgy and menacing aura).

The pun is so good I just had to share it to my international fellow ace attorney fans (hope you didn’t know that already lol)

[sailorblossoms-snowbaz]

Baz's raised eyebrow:

(yet another "Simon identifies as 'Baz-sexual' for very good reasons' post)

few things have annoyed me more with these books than when people do not take Simon's "I don't know anything about anything but maybe I'm just a Baz-sexual" comments seriously (dismissing it with a combination of not paying attention to what he's putting down and good old confirmation bias). He even says it in less "goofy" ways with lines such as "he's the only person I have ever wanted" (in the context of thinking about having sex) (note the emphasis on ever) (yes, it's one of the clues saying he didn't want to have it with Agatha, in case it's not clear)

"Like Baz has only ever wanted Simon, Simon has only ever wanted Baz," is necessary to bring up before I get to my point here. I have seen Simon being read as in love or attracted to Agatha ("he must have been or else how they had sex?"... I mean, Simon tells you why it happened without attraction, but even if he didn't, we could make an alphabetized list of reasons it can happen without it, the desire to fit in is no joke) or the idea of Simon liking all sorts of girls, including the girl he pointedly doesn't notice despite her being obvious to others, for the sake of drama and conflict. I have wondered if they don't believe the characters, or if they find the highlighted sentence here boring. "It's boring if the characters only want each other," "in real life people want multiple people" – indeed, but not everyone is wired the same (and why are we stuck on "real life" so much anyway in stories about half-dragon and vampire boys falling in love). But it's not like this sentence is without conflict. Note Baz's eyebrow...

In CO, when Simon says Trixie is cute, Baz's reaction is a boyish "I'm going to puke" comment, which is likely part of how he dealt with jealousy and thinking Simon was straight for years: masking his feelings with "harsh" or sort of "edgy" jokes (probably not the right words to use, but getting too hung up on precise wording is the reason I never finish these posts). In awtwb, Simon calls Pippa cute, and Baz raises an eyebrow...

By those reactions, we could say the idea of Simon calling someone cute because he finds them attractive crosses Baz's mind – or is something he feels in some way, even if the thought doesn't explicitly cross his mind. It's something the reader might assume as well... however, I don't think the way Simon uses cute – which can be used in many different situations – says anything about attraction for him. I mean, a gay man can see a girl being cute or gorgeous as well – Baz certainly does! (attraction is portrayed in these books as thoughts derailed, repetition, sentences being cut off, fixating in a detail no one else notices like they do – you see it with Baz and Simon, Agatha and Niamh, Shepard and Penny. Shep doesn't just call Penny cute – he loses his entire goddamn mind for a whole page about her cuteness and her knees. It's not just a passing comment).

I don't think those scenes when Simon says "cute" is highlighting something about him, other than the fact that he's able to note cuteness. I think it's saying more about Baz's insecurities (I know I once posted something long about it somewhere...) Baz brings attention to it in a way with his reactions... because he's bothered by it. It's something that's sort of hidden and sort of contained, but it's there.

Baz doesn't find himself desirable, partly because of his vampiric nature. But part of it is also about the complicated and messy fear that perhaps... Simon has a problem with being with a man (I know I have unpacked this in other posts, finding them though...). Perhaps "a girl would be better" (It's messier with boys than with girls, it's a thought that comes out before he catches himself with "I don't actually know anything about being with boys or girls".... "I don't know anything about being in a relationship," he says, while still being able to catch there was something wrong with Agatha and Simon's relationship when Simon talks about – because Simon will process things he would rather avoid when it's about opening up to Baz, he wants Baz to know things that would help Baz understand him better, even if he himself would rather not understand... still Baz can't let go of the programming of all those years believing in the golden couple – he has spent a longer time believing that than dating Simon, after all) (Agatha is alive and beautiful, the sort of beauty that's used to "embody" "desirability".... and Baz is "not alive"...) (as a side note, have you noticed the idea – or the actual action – of sex with Agatha is used both with Simon and Baz to indicate a lack of desire toward women?)...

While Simon thinks of Baz as the only person he has ever wanted – Baz is as desirable as it gets for him – Baz struggles with feeling desirable at all. Baz doubts and wonders and has to catch himself – even if he doesn't notice he's doing that. Even if he doesn't consciously think "a beautiful girl who is alive is more preferable than me, a gay male vampire." That is a far more interesting conflict than Baz having legit reasons to be jealous, I think. The fact that he has truly nothing to feel jealous about, and yet... he just can’t help it. It's hard to go against years of programming, of going against the idea that everything about yourself is undesirable and it's better to hide it – another way he matches with Simon. They also match in their insecurities, with small differences: Baz is so amazing and attractive while Simon doesn't feel like he's good enough for him, he can do better than him, etc... while Baz clearly only has eyes for Simon, Simon feels like Baz is merely stuck with him. And the conflict here is that you think "they need to TALK and voice their thoughts for the love of god, what do you mean Baz doesn't know Simon sees him as the love of all his lives??"... talking is not enough. That Simon and Baz only have eyes for each other is not without conflict. Sometimes we need to keep hearing some things, and even then... the fears and insecurities don't go away. Especially when we have spent a really long time believing ourselves to be unwanted, undesirable, something to be hidden. When we have been exposed to things that confirmed those beliefs for longer than we have been exposed to things that challenge them

[youredyingthatsallthereis]

kinktober day 22: cockwarming

this is my last departure from the prompt list ive been using! i wrote dacryphilia (crying) into a piece i did back in...june i believe, and i was very satisfied with how it came out but i just. i dont have any other ideas for that kink so i'm going with this instead /thumbs up emoji/

content warning: this is mushy and they are in love

read on AO3 | prompt list i will be returning to tomorrow! | word count: 760

soapghost, trans ghost, cis soap, immediately post MW2 canon

"all the way in."

ghost wiggled his hips a bit, working slowly so that soap's cock was fully seated inside him.

"that better, love?" soap asked, running a hand along the front of ghost's thigh.

ghost gave a contented sigh once his back was flush up against soap's chest. soap draped an arm over his torso and kissed behind his ear. "good."

soap rocked his hips a smidge, just enough to feel himself slip half an inch deeper in and out of ghost's cunt before settling to go back to what they were watching.

which happened to be ghost's favorite mini-documentary about deep-sea gigantism. soap combed his fingers through ghosts dark, short hair while they listened to the narrator quietly talk about the role buoyancy plays in creating monstrously large life on the ocean floor. ghost had watched everything this marine biologist had ever made (and thus so had soap), but this piece in particular was his favorite. soap let the familiar information wash over him, savoring the intimacy of what they were doing.

through a series of poorly timed last minute plan changes that were out of both of their hands, they hadn't seen each other in nine consecutive weeks. and while normally that wouldn't be such a big deal, ever since sheperd's betrayal they had both been a bit edgy about having to be away from each other for more than a day or so.

no one had questioned that they had started showing up together in the mornings, that they left work together at the end of the day, that they were rarely out of each others sights - everyone knew.

ghost had moved into soap's house shortly after they'd both physically recovered from their wounds and no one had said a word.

they'd wasted no more time, knowing that too much had already been lost to needless pining and stalling: they set about learning everything about each other every chance they got, whether that was soap cooking them breakfast on a saturday or watching ghost's ocean documentaries (usually followed by a very thorough lecture of ghost's take on the subject matter) or spending hours in bed experimenting with what made the other tick. at the end of it, soap and ghost had bound themselves together for good.

and so after such an unexpectedly long time apart, they'd been frantic for each other upon reunion. ghost had returned to soap impatiently tapping his foot on the tarmac and shoving his gear at the nearest soldier with a barked order to get it checked back in and half-dragging ghost home, needing him as close as possible now.

that had been several hours ago; they'd been in bed almost the entire time and had zero intention of leaving. they'd already decided that they didn't even want to talk about the mistakes and assignments that had led to them spending so much time apart, just focus on that they were together now.

ghost shifted his leg back, hooking it over soap's to pull him in just that much closer. soap pushed his hips forward, kissing the corner of ghost's jaw as his cock slid into him, already full of his spend, just that much further.

soap vaguely registered a small white jellyfish on the television as ghost took one of the captain's hands and held it tightly over his chest. "hate being away from you," he admitted quietly. "bloody torture. and i'd know all about that."

soap almost snorted at the last comment. "bleedin' christ, simon," he said. "it is, though."

they laid in comfortable quiet, ghost pressing soap's hand flat to his chest over his heartbeat, like he needed them both to know that it was still there. needed him as close as he could be in every way, like even having him inside his cunt wasn't close enough.

soap closed his eyes and rubbed his thumb across ghost's chest, letting the heat under his hands and against his chest and around his cock remind him that ghost was there, ghost was safe, ghost was alive. and so was he.

they stayed like that for some time, soft and warm and still, until the documentary ended and ghost reached back to put a hand on soap's hip, giving him a small push.

"give us one more?"

soap smiled into the side of his neck. "i'm not 20 anymore, love," he said.

"please?"

soap chuckled and put a hand flat over ghost's lower abdomen, rocking slowly in and out of him to get fully hard again. "can't say no to you."

[snootlestheangel]

More of the YouTuber AU random bits

Just thinking of this thing as I'm working on the drabbles

There's compilation videos of all the times Gaz kinda blushes/smiles softly when Alex calls him a pet name. There's compilations literally titled "Alex for SIMP President" and it's just all the times he's being Alex and in love with Gaz. The Among Us video fuels these like gasoline lol

There's "Soap Being Scottish" compilations.

There's "Times They Forgot Alex is an Amputee" compilations

There's compilations of Gaz's side eyes to his camera every time one of them says something really wild/insults him directly

Once he and Alex move in together there's compilations of "Times Alex Interrupted Gaz's Stream Just For CuddlesTM" and it's all the times where Alex just walks into Gaz's office and sits on his lap

There's "Times Gaz Had Beef With A Weird Russian Dude" compilations, but they're just every time anyone, especially Gaz, brings up his misfortunes with helicopters, especially when Nik is the pilot.

There's Ghost compilations that always comment on his dark humor/edgy humor; there's compilations on all the times he's referenced 'death' in his life (like how in some games his tag is "LegallyDead")

From @eaveplzzz 's tags during a reblog of the OG post, there's so many theory videos on what happened to Alex's leg; why do they always say "Classic Soap" or "Soap NO" when he has a bomb/sets off an explosion; Who Is Ghost? theory videos are a big hit, especially the ones about if he's actually "legally dead" or not; the theories about what happened between Gaz and Nik

Gaz eventually being convinced to do vlogs.

His first one is "Moving In Together" and it's literally just a cute/funny video taken from highlights of his stream where he and Alex unpack a bunch of boxes while answering questions from his chat. (the compilation videos go hard after this stream/video goes live) *there's one question during this where someone asks Alex if he's missing his leg because he sold it to help Gaz's career and he just beams at the joke while Gaz screams into his hands*

This stream/video was so popular Alex suggests they make an entire channel dedicated to doing streams like that again/playing games just the two of them/a day in the life type super duper cute shit *there's one clip where they start slow-dancing cause they're listening to a playlist put together by the chat and a slow song comes up. There's so many music video-esque compilations where there's a love song/dedicated-to-this-one-person-for-the-rest-of-my-life songs play to a bunch of their cute moments with the slow dancing in the kitchen being the refrain*

He does eventually post a vlog style video but it's just random bits of things he recorded while at a big gathering over the Christmas holidays with everyone. There's a few ways viewers piece together who is who: Soap because he's the only Scot, and they're always yelling his name in some fashion, Dylan (Gaz's friend) is also easily picked out, Nik once again due to his accent, and eventually everyone catches on with Price *comments go crazy spamming the time signature Price first appears with "Daddy??"*

What surprises everyone the most is when Ghost finally makes an on-camera appearance. It's a brief video, where he's smiling at Soap and Gaz doing something silly. It's just Simon in that moment: no mask, no black around the eyes, his hair is recently cut and styled, and he's happy

*bout to make it sad for a second y'all*

There's a stream once where Gaz makes it clear everything he makes during it go to a Veteran's Help program. It's before the holidays, a very vulnerable time for all veterans, and it's just a quiet stream where he plays a relaxing game and answer questions from chat. He talks about Task Force 141 (briefly and in as little detail as possible), he talks about the helicopter incidents, how he met all the guys he plays with, he talks about he and Soap getting up to no good together, he talks about some of the struggles he had adjusting to civilian life since he didn't know anything else, how much of a help his friends and Alex had been.

It's later revealed the reason he did the stream is for Simon. Because even though it's been years since the incident with his family, it's still something that can hurt badly to this day. How he and Soap were shopping for gifts for Soap's several nieces and nephews. How there was a little toy plane that made the exact same sound Simon's nephew's once did. They even looked the same. How a little blonde boy begged his mum for it. The child looked so familiar it broke one of Simon's barriers.

PTSD isn't curable, it doesn't just disappear over time. There's ways to trigger really bad episodes, and this was just one of those times. It was hard for everyone to see Ghost have such a big setback, but for Gaz? The way they all found ways to help Ghost during it. The way he and the rest of the team, their friends and loved ones, helped reach out to pull Simon back onto his feet. And Gaz wanted other veterans to have that support, especially during the holidays.

He and the 141 (Price, Soap, and Ghost) eventually start doing charity streams just for veterans and the many existing resources for them. They're always wacky, sometimes they're gaming, sometimes they're all in-person doing a fake game show with some of their friends. There's one where they all travel to Mexico to host one with their Las Almas friends to benefit North American veterans' benefits charities.

I don't know, I'm just having so many thoughts about this AU I might just write an entire GazAlex fic based on their lives involving Gaz becoming a big creator.

There's so many thoughts about this AU HOLY SHIT

[beevean]

So some recent... discourse put into my mind the concept of "power fantasy", and how people relate to it in different ways. Of course, I'm talking about Hector :P

Is Hector, in the games, a power fantasy? I think the answer is "yes but actually no but actually yes it's complicated".

Let's be honest, first: Hector is a product of his time. He is, in many aspects, Castlevania's response to the wave of edginess that was en vogue in the mid-2000s - I don't compare CoD to ShTH for no reason lol. Hector was always meant to be an anti-hero contrasting the pure heroes the games always starred before him:

—Why did you choose the theme of "revenge" for this game? Iga: Up to now, the Belmonts have been seen as the good guys. I thought it'd be nice to do something other than a moralistic "good triumps over evil" theme sometime. After all, Castlevania has always had an excellent world for telling a "dark hero" story. Alucard would be one such character… though even he is fighting for a just cause: "I've got to stop my Father!" So he's still kind of a good guy. This time, though, I wanted the motivation itself to be impure. So this theme is what I came up with, and then I thought it would be even more interesting if each side was out for revenge on the other.

Hector has "impure" motivations. His quest is completely selfish: while all the other protagonists want to face Dracula (or others in his place) because it's the right thing to do, Hector is just in to kill the man who ruined his life. In fact, he really couldn't care less about the Curse, and multiple times in the game he asks why can't Trevor just deal with the issues he doesn't want to deal with lol. This is in line with other characters of the same caliber, such as Shadow sneering at a city being invaded by aliens until there is something in for him, or Guts who declares that he's willing to let a whole town fall prey to demons, as long as Casca is safe. However, this is not a detriment to Hector's character like it would be nowadays, as he's also very much mean to be "cool": while obviously every protagonist has his cool factor, even going back to Simon in the first games who defeated Dracula all by himself and then had to heroically struggle with the Curse, Hector is cool in that, well, deliciously over-the-top way that was all the rage back then. He can ride wyverns as he slashes them, he can go toe to toe with Trevor himself to the point that even he is impressed, he can forge a gun and an electric guitar, cutscenes show him punching a stone devil with his bare first, he gloats in Dracula's face that he can nullify his Curse... yeah, he's a gigachad lol. The flaws are only meant to make him cooler and not "boring", as paragon heroes were seen at the time.

I, personally, never cared about this part. I'm not the target audience for this kind of power fantasy. Sure, I like that Hector is over-the-top cool and I will always joke about his most outlandish feats, but I'm not so keen on reducing him to those alone. I couldn't even explain why avenging your dead lover counts as part of a power fantasy lol.

This is why I latched on so much on the first half of his story, the one where Hector deals with Dracula, and why I insist that Hector is much more than his admittedly cliché archetype of "angry man on a revenge quest".

Calling Hector "stoic" is not even knowing the meaning of the word. Calling pretty much any CV protagonist "stoic" is factually wrong, as even the more serious ones like Alucard and Shanoa have other depths to them (Alucard is still grieving for his mother and we see it in a nightmare, Shanoa was deliberately made stoic and she subtly longs to feel again), but Hector doesn't even begin to fit the definition of "One who is seemingly indifferent to or unaffected by joy, grief, pleasure, or pain". The whole point of CoD is that Hector was left so emotionally vulnerable by his grief that both Isaac and Zead used him as a puppet. Anger is the complete antithesis of stoicism. "well anger is still a toxically masculine emotion" - memes aside, Hector shows other emotions too, most notably around Julia, the only person with which we see how actually gentle and polite he is when he doesn't have Dracula's influence scrambling his brain. By the way, you cannot ignore the effects of the Curse on both Hector and Isaac when you analyze them, especially the former:

It can't be plainer than this.

And it doesn't come out of nowhere, because not only Julia herself tries to warn Hector that Devil Forgemasters are susceptible to the Curse, he acts vulnerable around her. He apologizes for his unjust outbursts, sympathizes with her plight, is visibly affected by her grief when Isaac dies... sure, it might be all because he's lowkey crushing on her, if you want to see it that way (and I do have my words over the plot point of Julia looking like Rosaly: I would have preferred if the game had more time to show that Hector grew to see Julia as her own person beyond her appearance), but the point is that this behavior highly contrasts with how angry and aggressive he is to everyone else, which the reveal of the Curse recontextualizes.

Also, just saying, while anger can be toxic, the point of these storylines is usually precisely that revenge is bad. Unchecked anger is bad for you, and you shouldn't let yourself fall down that spiral, lest you lose yourself. Isaac got consumed by his own hatred and died as a tool; Hector realized in time that he should snap out of it and survives, also because he was nice to Julia and so she grew to care about him and saved him when he tried to kill himself <- a reaction that is very unmasculine, might I add, as toxic masculinity dictates that men should make other people pay for their pain. bro. bro this is the complete antithesis of "toxic masculinity". Again, this is really not knowing the meaning of the word.

I don't even need to pull examples from the manga, but just for completion's sake:

iunno about you chief, but someone who bursts into tears just because wifey told him that she's happy he was born isn't exactly the portrayal of toxic masculinity to me.

Which makes me segue into the next point!

Hector and Isaac are victims of abuse, and this is another very important angle to understand them. And I'm not just talking about their childhoods, of which we only get hints, although of course it does matter that the two experienced so much hatred and rejection in their youth that Dracula was the better option for them.

We don't see the details, but Dracula affected both of them deeply. He put them in a competitive dynamic, favoring Hector over Isaac: Isaac grew bitter with resentment, which made him double down on his loyalty to Dracula, while Hector only got the appreciation he craved at the price of his very humanity and morals, which weighed on him. The point of this favoritism is not really the core of their rivalry in game, as that one was caused by Hector's betrayal, but it gives a different dimension to the character. It would have been easy to have the mistreated guy the one who decided to turn his back to Dracula, but no, it was the golden child. Isaac was so entrenched in this dynamic that he never broke free, choosing instead to blame Hector and do everything in his power to prove himself to an uncaring Lord, including (in the manga) killing his own underlings so that he would be free to face Hector by himself. From PtR:

"My own body is proof of Your expectations for him" is such a hard-hitting line. Isaac fears that he didn't even disappoint his Lord, because his Lord didn't have expectations for him in the first place. It's Hector the one he's so proud of.

And Hector hates it. By all means, he should be happy to have a home, to be respected and appreciated and free to use his powers. And he used to be!

"Lord Dracula... You once accepted and needed my powers. There was a time when such a thing gave me joy..."

Hector was grateful for his Lord, but he couldn't live anymore in the safety of the castle, if the price was committing indiscriminate murder for the sake of a senseless revenge, going against his morals and being used as a weapon. Hector had to make a choice: keep living under Lord Dracula's protection, but losing his humanity piece by piece, or breaking free and facing the world that hated him, but as a free man?

Hector chose freedom over conditional safety and love. He was ready to die, as long as he died a free man. He put himself first, he turned his back against people who did not truly appreciate him, and despite the mess he left behind it was the right decision. And that's the power fantasy I adore, and that is what makes him a strong character in my opinion. It's the embodiment of achieving self-confidence, the healthy selfishness, the affirmation of the self when everyone else around you only sees you as an object or a prize, the reassurance that even if you fall, you can always get up and try again and become a person you can be proud of.

And Hector, after breaking free, very much acts like a victim of abuse. I spent countless words over how he displays the belief that he needs to do something to earn the right to be loved by Rosaly, unaccepting of the fact that she simply does because, well, he likes him and sees the good in him, and that's it. I wrote a whole analysis on how this belief stems from a sad naiveté on how the world works, because Hector is naive underneath the aloof exterior, and it's not something to make fun of him for, but a tragic result of living under Dracula for so long. I'll also point again to him having breakdowns because he hates himself and sees himself as inherently unlovable.

I could also spend all the words about the parallels about how Hector loves Dracula and how he loves Rosaly:

In both cases, he latches onto the only person who has showed him a modicum of kindness. He wants to give his life for them. The difference being, of course, that Dracula only appreciates Hector for what he does (and I could also go into a whole tangent on how Hector was personally raised by Dracula to be his knight and he has a piece of his essence inside him which parallels how abusive parents see their children as an extension of themselves), while Rosaly for who he is. With Dracula, Hector understands that all the shallow care in the world doesn't matter if he isn't also respected as a person: he still cares about him, in some fashion, but not the point of clinging.

And if Hector is ready to lay down his life for Rosaly because she finally showed him what real love looks like, is it any wonder that seeing her die would spark such a fury in him that it makes him prey to the Curse and to being once again twisted into a tool?

The power fantasy comes from the part where Hector breaks free of the abuse and manipulation - twice over. But he is also relatable, with all of his flaws, weaknesses, and mistakes he makes. The whole point of Hector's journey in the first half of his story is that he feels the need to atone for his sins, and the consequences of his actions all catch up to him in the worst of ways. Ignoring this to reduce Hector to an edgelord who only spends his life angry and then hooks up with a Rosaly replacement (which incidentally also ignores Julia's personality and agency and I might even call as misogynist as the plot point itself) is a huge disservice to the thought and care put into him to make him stand out from his own archetype.

Power fantasies are not inherently bad. Depending on the fantasy, they can be inspirational. Hector is inspirational to me, if that wasn't clear, I see part of me in his circumstances and I admire his arc: it tells you, "you can break free too, you have the strength to do so, and you will find people who will love you without reason". And I just generally speaking find him a very well written character despite stemming from a rather outdated context, because all the details come together to make him fleshed out and tridimensional.

[box-dwelling]

This needs to be made. WAA (and extended family, we may get too big for one party but this may get split over a few groups) and who I think everyone would play. Also presuming 5e for the system.

Phoenix: cleric. 1000000% with his obsession with helping people? Absolutely wants to be the healer and the cleric spell list gives a lot of options for chaotic play.

Trucy: a coward would say sorcerer. They are wrong. She is a forever DM. Don't forget she isn't just a performer, she's also a stage director. Plus her desire to constantly cheer up her friends translates perfectly into campaign design. I think he has special effects set up and has Mr Hat come out for scenes with 2 NPCs

Apollo: there are two choices. Either he's never played before and is just a begrudging human fighter, or he and Clay used to play all the time and he comes in with the most insanely fleshed out well constructed min max multiclass you've ever seen. But it's not like an annoying minmax where it take away from the other players, it's min maxed in a way to cover the rest of the parties flaws and actively heighten them all. It is a solid 50/50 he either gives no shits or gives the most shits ever

Athena: barbarian. She is using this to get out her aggression and good for her.

Pearl: she's new at this and kinda nervous but I think she has a cute little elven druid made up. She was going to go cleric but didn't want to step on Phoenix's toes.

Maya: Sorcerer and an absolute powerhouse of one at that.

Ema: Wizard. Fully roleplays the whole scholar of magic vibe too.

Edgeworth: the most paladin paladin player to ever play. His character is mounted because of his knight chess thing and they start off heavily based off a steel samurai character but I think he then uses it to channel some of his feelings about mvk so he may well go oathbreaker somewhere down the line

Klavier: Do I need to say it? Bard. Horniest horny bard you ever saw. But I think he keeps it relatively pg for trucys NPC's and focuses his flirting solely on Apollo.

Simon: samurai fighter. Edgy backstory. Actively causes chaos at all times.

Franziska: is invite but doesn't play.

[factual-fantasy]

25 asks :00000

@ocinstituterep (Posts in question)

The cooling suits they wear at the beach are the same ones they wear under their uniforms :00 And it doesn't necessarily reflect the sun,, its just a battery powered suit that keeps them cool :}

I wasn't pressured into drawing the art exactly,, but all the questions about it did push me a little into looking into the series more.. That's not really a bad thing though, I did enjoy drawing those pictures soooo-

I get this question a lot <XD When I was first designing my sona I wanted to add something to their hands. At the time my hands were covered in Band-Aids from dry skin and cat scratches. So I thought "Hey! Bandaged/bloody hands would be cool and edgy :DD" So I added them <XDD

Oh yeah, that episode was a bit odd huh? XD I think in my version of Octonauts they didn't go all the way down to its stomach- maybe just into the mouth and got the Puffer fish out.

Now the REAL episode that I basically 100% cut is the cone snail episode. You know why? Cone snails are estimated to have poison strong enough to kill 700 people! And there's NO antidote!! NO ONE would have survived being stung. Not even the Captain. They all would have died and left Peso abandoned on a ship full of the bodies of his friends in the middle of the ocean... :x pretty dark huh-

@britneyt

Thank you! :DD

@gregorythechild

XD I was getting tired of Gregory being a little snot. In game and in the fandom. So once again I made a character good out of spite! XDD

SKJAOSKJOSX I DO ACTUALLY XDDD

The basis for my Kirby Anime AU is I just found a way to add all the Metaknights to the story. You know, Axe knight, Mace night, Javelin Knight,,, etc.

This is obviously a SUPER angsty AU. For example, Axe Knight was Metaknight's first follower and best friend. But then he sacrificed himself to save Metaknight. Thinking he failed his soul was restless and he now wanders the galaxy fighting Monsters and honoring Metaknights name.. Not knowing that Metaknight survived. Its a REALLY long story that I should ramble about sometime XDD

I would advise against it,, there are plenty of good reaction images out there to find! I should know, I have 996 of them saved! I'm almost at 1000! XDD

@pinkbomb08

Thank you! And not at the moment no- but I might draw him again someday :}}

@cudlycorncornsworthcoberson

Noooooothingggg... :}}}

@annathefenecfox

I think its because the poor guy probably doesn't have enough free time to practice consistently. Being the Captain he likely has so much to do all the time.. and when he can finally sit down and indulge in hobbies,, he likely would just rather relax and read a book instead. :( Poor fella

Ah, sorry. I don't know of any. <:/

I have actually! :DD I did not sleep good that night :}}}

@invaderdrey

Thank you so much!!!! :DD

Thank you so much! And as for the memes.. ehh, I'd say just to be safe, don't make em. Comments are more than enough. The first thing I do when I wake up is check Tumblr and see if anyone left a comment on my posts. Literally! Comments are the best thing you can give me!

Thank you so much!! :DD

Heck yeah, that's the best part! <XDDD

It definitely depends on my mood, I'm split 50/50 on which one I enjoy more :000

@chickenmilk120

@its-paperd

:DDD Thank you so much!! That means a lot!

@milk-powrit (Post in question)

<XD Thankfully no, Jangles is not an iPad kid. He was just playing on my phone because Bibi and I were conked out and he was bored XDD

@simon-says-lots-of-things

:DD Thank you so much!! And yeah, I don't care what's canon or not. I wont be drawing any lovey-dovey/shippy content unless its with my own original characters. Its just not my thing man, 🤷‍♂️

@twohourstoolong

Thank you! And yeah if I were you I'd ditch pinterest. Any time I have been browsing artwork on google and clicked the link, It always took me to some stolen artwork on pinterest. I'd just rather people never found me then have found me through stolen art on pinterest..

I have not :0 sounds thrilling though! :D

[whineandcheese24]

so @erch0maii said in a post that i didn’t want to hijack that the reason that both screen adaptations of tmi didn’t feel quite right is because they were these dark gritty adaptations while the books are, at heart, campy and silly and comical. and i was thinking about this and how it relates to the other series in the tsc canon. when i first read tsc i thought that the reason they felt tmi felt different from tid, tda, and tlh is because they were her first books but it really all comes down to the character’s sense of humor and genre awareness. because all the other tsc series (and i’m betting twp too) take themselves so seriously, but timi doesn’t do that. 

with genre awareness, the characters are put in this dark edgy fantasy war series but they act like their in a satire or a comedy. my favorite parts of qoaad were when jace and clary were in these dangerous situations and were acting so nonchalant about it. and it wasn’t even like a fake confidence or something, they genuinely just are Like That. like at the war council they walked in casually with normal clothes and people didn’t even notice them until lily called them out. like, they could have changed, they could have made a big entrance, but no, why bother. and later in brocelind when manuel rips out the tent and they’re playing tic tac toe. they don’t acknowledge him at all, not even to make a joke about him ruining the tents they borrowed. they just sit there playing tic tac toe. and again on the imperishable fields, jace has a knife to manuel’s back and clary is holding the stanchion but emma describes them as walking as if they’re out for a morning stroll.

and like look at the parallels between the series. the tlh crew met one and a half princes of hell and barely made it out with their sanity. the tmi gang has collectively met 3 princes of hell and in literally every situation they’re on the same level. when emma and julian went to thule it was this dark scary traumatizing thing, this actual hell that wasn’t quite hell. and when james, matthew, lucie, and cordelia went to edom it was this terrible experience that both lucie and matthew spent literally dying. but when the tmi gang went to hell, what ever. yeah it was serious and traumatic and scarring but not in the same way. izzy and simon hooked up. clary and jace had sex. and alec made fun of all four of them for it after. jace got caught by a demon and clary scolded him like he left the fridge open. they literally snuck into sebastian’s elite fortress with a plan from simon’s dnd campaign. and diyu?  even when simon was having a mental breakdown he managed to flirt with izzy it took the tlh gang 3 long-ass books to defeat belial and christopher died in the process. the tmi gang beat sammael in a f*cking side book. if you go to the shadowhunter wiki and go to azazel’s history he’s said as being a part of team good. imagine how casual you have to be to get a prince of hell to join ‘team good’

and then there’s the angels. tessa’s contact with ithuriel almost killed her. emma and julian’s whole nephilim thing also almost killed them. and yeah, clary’s first encounter with raziel was very somber and serious. but in cols simon literally blackmailed raziel into giving him a magical sword. and with faerie, every encounter that the tda gang have with faeries or in faerie is this dangerous quest that could get everybody killed. the tmi gang don’t hesitaste to insult the seelie queen to her face

the thing that sets tmi apart from the rest of tsc is the characters’ refusal to take anything, themselves and everyone around them, seriously for very long

[shoukiko]

My Simon "Ghost" Riley headcanons

Throws up this and runs away. No cuz fr, I don't know how else to share this other than just *BLEH* *Runs* plz enjoy (I hope my boyfriend doesn't see) Word Count: 688 Fandom: Call of Duty Modern Warefare Purely sfw!!!!!!

I see so many people talk about him like he's this cold insecure guy, not for me, he has so much confidence and loves showing off especially in front of you. Soap showing you some dumb trick he can do with a knife? Ghost wil 100% come in like "Oh yea, watch this?" and do something 10x cooler. He catches you watching some guy on YouTube mincing some veggies really fast? Ghost will practice in his free time and randomly come to you like "Come, I wanna show you what I can do" and then make you watch him mince veggies. Anytime you take a selfie he has to photo bomb it in the back with him flexing or a peace sign, he's jsut silly like that.

Bro cannot cook for shit. He burns everything so he sticks with microwaved meals or a sausage on a stove (courtesy of this post) If he's cooking and you're around he will look to you with a desperate face and say something like "Help me out, yeah? Cmon"

TOUCHING!!!!!! LOVE LANGUAGE IS TOUCHING!!!!!! He NEEDS to be touching you in some way. Sitting on a couch, but someone is in between you and him? He has his arm reaching out behind them to touch your hair/shoulder. He's laying down with you sitting up? His feet are under your thighs. He loves touching you in way that aren't super obvious, but when you're alone he needs to be holding you in some way.

I like to think he plays video games on his free time. Maybe not like Minecraft (He would definitely play if you asked him) but more like FPS games cuz he knows he'd be good. (He also has a banger set up that he's really proud of, he'd build you a PC if you asked)

If you guys are just friends/long distance, you'd talk to him over Discord, maybe you have a server with him. (And perhaps Soap and Gaz....Price too old :3) He would ping you like "@name I wanna play a game, play with me." and you you didn't respond fast enough, he would spam ping until you answer cuz he's desperate for your attention.

He likes to look at you, whenever you call him he will instantly switch to a video call so he can see your face, but he's the tyep to not pay attention and only show his forehead because of how he holds his phone. Maybe on discord before you play he asks you to turn your camera on and when you don't wanna he hangs up and refuses to join back. (Cuz hes a big baby)

Back rubs, giving and recieving....need I say more

He made an instagram/twitter/whatever you use, just to follow you. He only ever follows you until Gaz or Soap beg him for a follow, Price again doesn't really care for it. He likes all of your posts, including the cringey ones. If you post selfies and get compliments, he'd reply to someone saying "Get in line" or "They're taken, fuck off with ya"

His texts are short, but you can tell how he really means it, he's better with actual words than texts because he likes being able to look at your reactions. Things like "You wanna get some takeaway? I can order you something, what would you like?" Will turn into "Food, yea?" in text.

He'd let you paint his nails, would go around showing people what his "Lovie" did to him. He'd also be surprisingly good at painting yours, steady hands~

"Hey, Ghost" "Simon." "What?" "You heard me."

He likes playfighting, maybe you're standing next to him and he'll randomly shove you just to get a reaction, he finds it cute.

If you own a pet, it loves him, but he doesn't love the shedding. Ruins his edgy look.

He cares, but he shows it quietly so he doesn't embarrass you in any way. If you're crying, he'll come to you and give you a soft headpat, or rub your back. He won't say anything until after you've calmed down That's all for now~~ I hope you guys enjoy this as much as I do!! If you want more PLEASE TELL ME I WILL DELIVER!!!!!

[manygeese]

mega projecting rn, this is

PERCY JACKSON CHARACTERS AS SONGS FROM MY PLAYLIST

aka what I think they would do for karaoke, what’s they like, and what song is them coded

PERCY

What he’d do karaoke to: Beyond the Sea by Bobby Darin. Son of Poseidon thinks water songs are funny.

What song he’d like the most: either Angry Young Man or Allentown, both by Billy Joel. Hard hitting lyrics and instrumentals to match.

What song he has the vibes of: Kodachrome by Paul Simon. Silly, jaunty, but kind of soothing at the same time. Reminds you of your childhood, almost.

ANNABETH

What she’d do karaoke to: Stand by Me by Ben E. King. She’s a romantic lady, what can I say? She’d totally be winking at Percy when she sings the chorus.

What song she’d like the most: Arthur’s Theme (Best That You Can Do) by Christopher Cross. She has classical vibes and this is the closest thing to classical as I have on my playlist. Also, I feel like she’d love jazz and this is jazz-adjacent.

What song she has the vibes of: She’s Always A Woman by Billy Joel. Sentimental, cool, but still oozing with emotion.

JASON

What he’d do karaoke to: Total Eclipse of the Heart by Bonnie Tyler. Boy puts on a performance.

What song he’d like the most: My Way by Frank Sinatra. He feels good about himself and all the stuff he’s been through while listening to it.

What song he has the vibes of: Out of Touch by Daryl Hall & John Oates. Edgy, cool, and a bop.

PIPER

What she’d do karaoke to: Lovefool by The Cardigans. Daughter of Aphrodite thinks love songs are funny. She’s a really good singer though, so she can choose any song and still knock everybody’s socks off.

What song she’d like the most: Yesterday by the Beatles. I think she’d like sad songs (not breakup songs, more like “wallowing in self pity, wondering what happened to us” songs).

What song she has the vibes of: Thank You For the Music by ABBA. Self worth problems, putting all your value in one ability? Piper coded.

LEO

What he’d do karaoke to: Let’s Hear It for the Boy by Deniece Williams or Thank God I’m A Country Boy by John Denver. The first because he’s some sort of LGBT+ and thinks it’s funny, the second because he’s Texan and thinks it’s funny. Also Fernando by ABBA.

What song he’d like the most: Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go by Wham! He identifies with it. Also he loves the dorky Just Dance for it.

What song he has the vibes of: Telephone Line by Electric Light Orchestra. Hopeless romantic vibes right there.

HAZEL

What she’d do karaoke to: Fly Me to the Moon by Frank Sinatra. She’d eat any jazz song up, really, but this one’s got her name written all over it.

What song she’d like the most: Bad, Bad Leroy Brown by Jim Croce. It’s got that school house rock vibe that you know she’d love. And also, bar fights! Yay!

What song she has the vibes of: Put Your Records On by Corinne Bailey Rae. Happy, sends a message, gives off sunny day and Hazel vibes.

FRANK

What he’d do karaoke to: Delilah by Tom Jones. He’s belting this shit in the shower at 3 AM.

What song he’d like the most: Oh, What A Beautiful Morning by Gordon Macrae from the musical Oklahoma. He’s embarrassed to admit it, but this boy loves old Roger’s and Hammerstein musicals (The Music Man, Carousel, etc.) that go on for too long and have unnecessary songs. He thinks they’re pretty.

What song he has the vibes of: Everybody Loves Somebody by Dean Martin. Gentle giant vibes.

NICO

What he’d do karaoke to: So Long, Mom (A Song for World War III) by Tom Lehrer. He’s a sucker for old satirical songs and loves watching his friends react as he sings them.

What song he’d like the most: The Vatican Rag by Tom Lehrer. Again, because he likes satirical songs. He cried laughing the first time he heard it, having grown up in the Catholic Church (of Italy, no less).

What song he has the vibes of: Carry on Wayward Son by Kansas. Stark contrast from the earlier songs but it’s just… so Nico coded. The type of stuff you can head bang but also perform ballet to.

REYNA

What she’d do karaoke to: We Didn’t Start the Fire by Billy Joel. She memorized the whole thing and likes flexing on everybody else about it because they don’t have the guts nor the dedication.

What song she’d like the most: Fame by Irene Cara. She unwinds to this in her room after a long day. She also totally does embarrassing dances to it.

What song she has the vibes of: Leningrad by Billy Joel. A song about war, seemingly endless cycles of violence, but small victories and reconciliation.

[idontwanttospoiltheparty]

John Lennon Tribute Songs – Musings and Impressions

I decided this morning to look into what John Lennon tribute songs (+songs about John's death) are out there and found the results quite mixed but interesting. So here's some of my thoughts on them.

Includes songs by: Bob Dylan, The Cranberries, David Gilmour, Elton John, George Harrison, Yoko Ono, Paul McCartney, Paul Simon, Queen.

All Those Years Ago – George Harrison (1981)

Roll On John – Bob Dylan (2012)

Probably the most classic tribute song on this list, which is why I'm mentioning it first. I think it's somewhat misunderstood, because in my opinion it is far more personal than it's sometimes given credit for, even though it does fall into some clichés with how it references John's songs. It's overall positive, focusing on the good aspects of John and George's relationship as well as of John's legacy as a whole, with a few problematizing nuggets peppered in ("Living with good and bad"; "You had control of our smiles and our tears"). I see how the religious edge might be off-putting to some, but it feels incredibly earnest to me. The rock n' roll guitar riff is a lovely tribute to John's unabashed love for that genre.

(Also, I wrote a bit more in depth about the song and how I think it relates to George's view of John here.)

This is not a song I can justify the existence of. If it had been released shortly after John's murder maybe, but I don't see what it brought to the table 30+ years after the fact. It feels extremely gimmicky, dropping simplistic lyrical references and Wikipedia-page facts, and otherwise doesn't seem like it has anything substantial to say. I don't think these types of songs have to be written by someone who had a deep personal connection with the subject, but none of this feels natural, earned, or remotely insightful and the emotions are rather vapid.

Murder – David Gilmour (1984)

This song is musically interesting and the lyrics are quite compelling, but the centering of MDC's point of view is somewhat uncomfortable, given the actual context of his motivations. I feel this song works better as a reflection on murder as a concept, rather than a specific murder.

I Just Shot John Lennon – The Cranberries (1996)

The title of this one worried me but actually it sounds like it could be on Some Time in New York City if you threw a few saxes onto it; John wrote about tragedies in a very similar way (like the Troubles, which The Cranberries – of course – also wrote about). Despite the directness, this works and feels poignant rather than edgy.

Empty Garden (Hey Hey Johnny) – Elton John (1982)

I like the way this song opens with the metaphor of a gardener, giving the song a degree of universality, not just in the sense that John "belonged to the world" but also that it could be related to any loss. This is contrasted with the bridge ("And I've been knockin', but no one answers…"), where John is finally name-dropped, which adds such a personal touch to the song. It's masterful and heartbreaking, especially given the fact that Elton was having trouble getting through to John during his lifetime as well. A wonderful, heartfelt tribute.

The Late Great Johnny Ace – Paul Simon (1983)

This feels less like a tribute and more like a reflection on history. John's death in 1980 is contrasted with Johnny Ace's death in 1954, as well as John F. Kennedy's in 1963. The music is harrowing and intriguing, which really underlines the senselessness of all these deaths. I enjoy the observed parallelisms and the way Paul manages to make the song personal despite not having a close rapport with John. In that way it kind of reminds me of A Day In The Life.

I Don't Know Why – Yoko Ono (1981)

Life Is Real (Song for Lennon) – Queen (1982)

Like Here Today mentioned below, this is more of an anti-tribute song in my view. Ultimately it seems that to Yoko, the search for meaning in John's death is fruitless. Musically, the song is a bit long and repetitive, but as she sings: "You left me, you left me, you left me without words."

Also, the story the album cover tells is poignant, possibly more so than any song on it: a glass, which could be half empty or half full; the fog like an uncertain future, clouding the New York skyline; a pair of glasses, the ghost of a lost loved one; and vision itself, forever obstructed by the murder Yoko was forced to witness.

Musically, I find this one to be quite wonderful and I think I can see how it was influenced by John's sound to an extent. But it also appears to be so personal to Freddie Mercury as well as rather cryptic that it feels odd as a tribute, per se. That's not really a problem in my opinion, but it's notable that without the name-drop it wouldn't even be obvious this song was about someone – let alone John Lennon – having died. This makes the "(Song For Lennon)" part of the title feel a tad performative.

Here Today – Paul McCartney (1982)

It was thinking about this song this morning that prompted me to go listen to the other entries. While "All Those Years Ago" is a song in which George seems to proclaim that he understands John better than most people, on "Here Today", Paul discredits himself as a source on John basically immediately; within the first few lines of the song, he asserts that John would laugh in response to Paul claiming he really knew John. He's in a sense shooting down the idea of writing a straightforward tribute like George's because he does not appear to trust himself to make absolute statements on who John was. Instead, he shifts the focus to his own experience of their relationship, declaring that he loves John and is thankful, despite their possible lack of mutual understanding.

The song is fiercely personal and does not leave space for someone to relate to it as an uninvolved fan of John's, or even as one of John's loved ones who is not Paul, like Empty Garden and All Those Years Ago do. And yet Paul plays this song every night in concert as a tribute. It fascinates me deeply, not to mention it is lyrically one of his standout pieces as well as immensely moving musically.

[sailorblossoms-snowbaz]

I’ve talked a lot about how awtwb takes some of the things Simon has been putting down in the previous books and makes them a lot more clear and explicit (like the many instances where he’s saying “I already had feelings for Baz long before I kissed him” and “my previous relationship was void of both romance and attraction” and “I already felt like I wanted out of it, I just waited until the other person ended it because I didn’t want to be the one to do it”)…. But you can also see that with Baz

It has been brought to my attention that before the sequels (and it seems like even after them in some cases) there was an idea of Baz as sort of “edgy” and more “rough” than he actually is like… even in CO you can see that, while he has thorns and barb wires, this is a wall – a mask to protect his soft and vulnerable heart. He might have a somewhat “mean” sense of humor, but being genuinely hurtful isn’t like him at all. It hurts him as well – it’s him going against his nature. You can see that from pretty early on, when he tells us that when Simon is getting all worked up… he might taunt or push him away, but what he truly wants to do is to comfort him.

In CO, iirc there’s a scene in Baz’s house when Baz laughs and Simon asks him to not make fun of him (he thinks Baz is laughing at him). Baz goes along with it with “When will I ever laugh then?”… but that’s just the wall coming up, it’s Baz not being ready to be vulnerable yet. It’s different from when Baz says “I’m texting my other boyfriend, the one who texts me back” (let me wack you for making me suffer like that) or “That’s the only thing (petit fours and where they sell them or something like that) that you learned in first year” (essentially some sort of good-natured verbal sparring and foreplay for them at that point – Simon hits back with “not true, learned you were a git,” Baz pushes him into the bed, and Simon pushes him against the wall to kiss him… I mean).

What Baz is doing in that CO scene, which he has likely been doing up to that point, is to pretend/let Simon think he’s laughing at him, when in reality he’s laughing because he simply thinks Simon is funny, which is a different thing. Baz finds Simon funny! (it’s one of the things he likes about him, but he can’t just let him know just yet) (and Simon likes Baz’s sense of humor too, finds it a turn-on even, which gives us Golden Moments later). In awtwb Baz says “Simon makes me laugh,” “he always manages to make me laugh” or something like that.

Similarly, when Simon says “I’ll always be less than you” in CO and Baz says “I know, it’s a dream come true,” because again, he can’t allow himself to be vulnerable. It’s too early in the relationship for him to let Simon know how much he means for him. He has spent too long believing Simon could never want him, too long protecting himself. You have to remember it took Baz seeing the humdrum (he believes himself to be monstrous, and he sees Simon is as messy and, through the humdrum, as “villainous” as he believes himself to be – “we match”) to even admit that he’s attracted to Simon. But he never for a second believes Simon is less than him, or that he’s anything less than everything he wants.

You have enough information to say he’s just saying shit he doesn’t mean in CO (can’t be vulnerable yet) but this is way more explicitly after Simon’s breakdown makes all of Baz’s thorns and barbed wires go away (and even that sense of humor Simon loves, as Baz knows Simon is unwell and is so afraid of doing anything that could hurt Simon more)… Baz thinks “he’s lovely, a sad mess and rough around the edges… but still so lovely” – even when Simon is at his worst, when he’s “fading away” and in a state a lot of people would be put off by (and wouldn’t have patience for) Baz still believes he’s lovely.

Baz never believes Simon losing his magic makes him less than him. Simon mistakenly believes losing his magic makes him “not worthy of Baz” but the reality is that Baz would give up magic without a second thought if it gets in the way of being with Simon. We know how much he loves magic, how important it is to him… and he would have broken his wand for Simon in a heartbeat. (Simon would never let him, though, because he knows how important it is to him! The mere idea causes him distress) (Baz’s completely matches Simon’s unhinged “I have killed for Baz and I would do it again” “there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for Baz” energy, he’s just a bit more dramatically poetic in expressing it. “What a ridiculous creature, like I wouldn’t make the world etc”)

[mermaidsirennikita]

Need your Saltburn review though 👀

I will preface by saying that I personally find Emerald to be a filmmaker/writer that is rather boring at best and kind of... horrifically misled in that she thinks that shocking "darkness" = depth at worst. I think A Promising Young Woman had some fun visuals at points (and so does Saltburn--though I think this has less to do with Emerald having an eye and more for Emerald understanding aesthetic, which makes sense when you realize that her dad is an Eton-educated jeweler to the stars, King of Bling, I wonder if that possibly could ever have anything to do with a UK performer's rise, hmmmmm--) but the way it ended was just... Lol. Yes, Emerald! I know that this is how the story would probs end in real life, the women of the world NEEDED TO KNOW.

(Princess Weekes did a good little video essay about PYW btw, would recommend.)

But yeah, point is--I don't think Saltburn is a misstep for Emerald. I think she's just very mediocre and self-indulgent. You can be self-indulgent and get away with it when you have a vision and something to say (see: Baz). I don't think Emerald has something to say. I think Emerald has concepts, which she pushes to a point she thinks is edgy, but doesn't actually... string into a coherent idea.

First off, Saltburn is nothing new; and it doesn't need to be. I like the pretentious rich people problems aesthetic. I love the bacchanal of the upper crust sensibility. Hell, I loved Donna Tartt's The Secret History. Sierra Simone's Thornchapel series is one of my favorite things she's done. I love Cruel Intentions. I also love The Talented Mr. Ripley, which--

My good man. If you wish to watch what you think Saltburn was going to be, but with better actors (including Jude Law in what is essentially the Jacob Elordi role, which, uh, how we have fallen as a society) and honestly better homoeroticism in a movie made like 20 years ago... just watch The Talented Mr. Ripley.

But yeah. So, I think everything Emerald does is meant to shock but doesn't go quite far enough. It's little moments that happen, and aren't really contextualized in a way that feels like it's there to be anything more than shock value, which makes it less shocking. Like, the period fingerbang--if those characters had a dynamic which led up to that moment, if I felt the actual power play there, it might actually shock me. Or be sexy? For the record, Fair Play has a period sex scene within its first five minutes that is both more surprising and better in every way. The shit with Farleigh? Would be compelling. That was the one bit of chemistry in the movie, the moment when Oliver and Farleigh talked to each other right before the whole singalong disaster. But then it's happening and I'm like "why is Barry Keoghan fucking everyone in this movie except for Jacob Elordi? What is the point?"

And what is the point indeed. Jacob Elordi has the charisma of a medium-sized tree, and I suspect a medium-sized tree would do a better job of ditching the Aussie accent. Emerald's inadequacies could be overcome and made into a thing that is campy, maybe? Not good, but fun? Barry Keoghan does his best with the material. He's fun in the last like ten minutes of the movie wherein he's basically monologuing like a demented real housewife and dancing around naked. He tries so hard to create chemistry with Jacob, while Jacob's vibe is very "no homo". (But the character is supposed to be no homo, you say--is he, first off, because I honestly don't know what Emerald is saying, and second... Like.... The character can be not attracted to Barry's character will still giving us an essence of intrigue that would inform why Barry is spellbound.)

But the biggest issue is that the movie hinges on Jacob Elordi being worthy of obsession, and he is just a flop in this role. He doesn't sell himself as this posh, beautiful, Brideshead Revisited-But-A-Bro guy. He can't really act (there's a scene where the movie cuts to him giving a smile that I think is supposed to be charming and I went "yikes" out loud). He is up against people who are actually actors, which makes it a bit worse. Everything feels very forced and constructed, for want of a better term. If you do not get WHY this guy, then the movie flops. And try as I might, I cannot get WHY this guy.

(Might I add--the bathtub scene would've been more intriguing had we seen Jacob interact with the voyeurism, some sense that he knew, whether or not he enjoyed it. The queerness in this movie is so... It's just this queer guy being obsessed and rebuffed and murderous, and I don't know, there didn't seem to be enough exploring the ramifications of that kind of story.)

The Talented Mr. Ripley also hinges on the focal point of obsession being worthy of obsession. And again. It's Jude Law. And it's Jude Law giving a really good performance, too.

The movie also does some shit I really don't think it's equipped to do. Like, the premise is essentially the working class interloper (but like, he's not as working class as he saaaays so oooooohhhhh) is preying on this family of rich folks who offered him a place to land. And it's not inherently bad, imo, to tell that story. However, you need the rich people to have some role beyond being prey; you need to understand the predator's contempt beyond jealousy. But the rich people are cardboard. They aren't sharp. They may have a few throwaway lines that illustrate their own sins (including some very clumsily handled racism) but ultimately the movie gives Oliver more power than it does the elite upon whom he preys. So ultimately, you come away from it feeling like you're watching the anxieties of the upper class, re: the encroaching middle and working class... But there's no examination, because the rich people are just victims lol. I think it's genuine anxiety.

Yeah though, I thought it was really hokey basically.

[rebornologist]

Hi! I absolutely love your blog and all the wonderful things you've written, thank you so much for sharing your incredible work on here <3

I wanted to ask if ud be open to writing headcanons for a poly! relationship between gokudera, enma and their s/o?

Either way I wish you the most wonderful day and hope you are surrounded with vibes as good as your writing✨

Thank you for the kind words, nonny! I interpreted it as a dynamic wherein Gokudera and Enma are separately dating the same person, with informed consent. I honestly might add more/change my mind on these after I reread the Simon arc and get a refresher on their interactions in canon, but I have a few thoughts on it. I could not pass up an opportunity to talk about polyamory, so I hope these suffice for now!

♡ Gokudera/SO/Enma Headcanons ✧

Gokudera and Enma met through Tsuna and only grew closer when they both started dating the same person. Their S/O was completely transparent about it as their individual relationships developed, and the two men were initially pretty awkward around each other unless their shared partner was present. I think that the bond that they form as time goes on is still fairly platonic, if not only physically.. intimate, on occasion, with their partner in between.

In the beginning, Hayato felt quite tense about the arrangement and had to work through some of his insecurities to wrap his head and heart around the idea of not competing for his S/O’s affections. Enma is fairly accepting from the get-go, trusting his S/O’s positive words about Gokudera, but not being very proactive in getting to know him any more than that.

They filled different relationship niches, and it was surprisingly easy to fall into a comfortable routine, since the boys were busy with different things at different times. Their S/O gets some of the Vongola drama and Simon drama mixed up sometimes, as they both vent to their partner about new developments and whatever’s been stressing them out lately.

It’s fairly interesting for their S/O to introduce their boyfriends because from photos, people often assume that both of them are super edgy bad boys, and they only hear about how sweet and soft these guys can be from their S/O. It’s not until they meet the boyfriends in question that it all makes sense. Gokudera and Enma may be the ultimate scary dog privilege, but they have a reputation amongst their friends of being super whipped for their S/O.

Their key bonding moment was when S/O suggested that they go to a cat cafe together, since all three of them have a soft spot for kitties. Enma taught Hayato a thing or two about how to properly handle the animals, and the storm guardian was so excited when some of the cats voluntarily snuggled into his lap. It was one of the moments where it both clicked in each of their minds what their S/O saw in the other.

Both of them can be a bit scatterbrained and will leave their rings, bracelets, and belt chains behind in their S/O’s living space after visiting. They even get them mixed up sometimes, and initially would constantly find themselves going ‘did I always have this ring?’ before it clicks in their head that it belongs to their boyfriend-in-law.