#simo answers

[bones4thecats]

Hi, absolutely do not take this as criticism, I'm just a huge history nerd, finnish, and very amused by your writing, but Simo Häyhä never fought a single japanese or german soldier as far as I'm aware. The war he fought in was against the russians, though you have the correct time period!

Again, not a criticism, just a little history lesson (I'm too nerdy about finnish history, sorry x>)

Don't worry Anon, I'm not taking this to heart! I'm quite into history myself but I wrote this in one of my free classes and my brain went dead whilst writing it. Thank you for the small lesson though! Now I have something to hold over the person who told me's head lol!

Ngl tho, Finnish history is quite interesting!! And I didn't mean to post it early, as I was going over it, I just have a massive headache soooo, heh.

But don't worry, it's been fixed, but that guy I got info from...

Anyways, my bad Anon, have a nice night!!

[homunculus-argument]

This may be a question that a lot of people cannot answer because they've never seen it happen, but what's something funny or interesting that anime somehow always seems to get wrong about your country? Like even if one character is just randomly your nationality but obviously only in name, and some odd trope that has nothing to do with your country in real life, that's somehow always present?

It's not often I've seen anime/manga depicting finnish character(s), but one thing that consistently gets me is how casually Japanese creators will give female characters names that are culturally strictly male. I got sidetracked into writing a whole essay about this (twice) before I came back to my senses and spared you from it, but I will say that finnish naming conventions are very strict about gendered names, and there are like 5 truly gender-neutral traditional finnish names, which are all so old-fashioned and rare that I've never actually met a person with one of them.

Like this is one of those beautiful examples of cultural contrast - I know next to nothing about Japanese naming conventions, but I can see how it could just genuinely not occur to someone to go look up whether it's normal to name a girl Simo or Jouko.

[flowerfreya]

Complaint

This is part 11 of The Office AU

Chapter Index

a little tiff between wacky girlfriend and reader

Pairing Poly!141 x reader

You hear your name being called softly, you look up and see Gaz standing there. You give him a smile, “What’s up?”. 

You notice that his smile looks pained, not reaching his eyes and is starting to look like a grimace. 

“Can talk to you for a moment”, then nods back to his office, “In private”.

No, not really, “Of course”. You're raking your brain trying to figure out what you did wrong. DId you mess up Price’s meeting, missed an important email, took too long of a lunch, or maybe you did nothing wrong and they are giving you a raise. 

You try to meet Price’s gaze but he’s enthralled with his computer and his door is shut he wouldn’t hear Gaz anyway. What worries you is that Simon nor Soap will look at you. Not that odd for Simon since he only looks at you when you aren’t looking at him but with Soap who is always looking at you trying to distract you, his head is down and you know he’s not doing anything because he is just staring at the keyboard. 

You follow Gaz to the annex, “Take a seat”. 

You sit with your hands crossed in your lap, “Do you know why I called you back here?”

“No”

“How long have you had Simon’s number”, you look up then, surprise and disbelief on your face. Simon filed an HR complaint. against you. 

“Well, I have everyone’s number”, you start picking at a hangnail trying not to fidget in your chair, “you gave me your numbers”, you reply. 

“not in trouble, it’s just that some people are worried that you might be abusing or harassing Simon”, you can tell he is trying to do this in the nicest way possible, he has his best HR voice on. 

“Simon,said that?” , you ask back still not really comprehending where did this come from.

“You didn’t call Simon last night asking if he wanted to get dinner with you?”

“Well , I did yes but-”.

Gaz cuts you off, “That's not appropriate use of the number”. 

There’s tears welling up in your eyes. You never wanted to make Simon uncomfortable , you thought that you were friends and he was just as lonely as you were. 

“I’m going to get fired for this?”, you ask, trying to wipe the tears before they ruin your makeup. 

“No , `course not”, which has you relieved but now you're ready for this day to end. 

“So, can I head back?”

“Yeah”, and then he mentions not to worry about this, since nothing has been documented it was just a warning. Ha, you think, don’t worry about it. Now all you're going to do is worry about it. 

When you sit down at your desk you look up and see Simo giving you a question thumbs up.You nod once and then start typing on your computer to look busy. You decide to skip lunch , just trying to stay out of everyone’s way when a wacky girlfriend shows up. She doesn’t even check in with you before kissing Soap on the mouth. Loudly. Giving Simon a check kiss before heading towards you, “Did Kyle talk to you today” ,she ask sweetly. 

Who the hell is Kyle, “Kyle?”, you question. 

“Oh silly me, I forgot he only goes by his nickname, Gaz”. 

How did she know that you talk to Gaz today, “Yeah”, you answer slowly. 

“Good, I don’t want anyone to be uncomfy”, she giggles, “You know what I mean”. 

Oh.

Oh.

No you don’t because you didn’t do anything wrong, but you know what it looks like when a woman is trying to stake her claim on a man, “Yeah, I know exactly what you mean”, you reply back.

Masterlist

[janeeyrewannabe]

thinking about Simon and Patty's developing relationship

1049 words

I already know how Simon would act. He’s so intense in every aspect of his life. In his art, his work, his relationships with other people, his love wouldn’t be any different. His feelings for patty are a novel thing. Simon’s never been the relationship kind of guy, even a casual hookup is still too intimate. He keeps his heart under lock and key along with his thoughts and admiration, but with patty it’s different. The way she treats everything, especially him, with the utmost devotion makes him want to be better.

Being in prison was hard, reintegrating into the real world and becoming a functioning, contributing member of society was fucking worse. Fresh out of jail and experiencing a new kind of relationship, a loving one, was something else. He’s never had any kind of monogamous situation with anyone, even when he was younger it was girls he barely knew in dimly lit rooms or bathrooms who he never he interacted with outside of sex. The shift was tough at first, as he falls deeper and deeper in love he wants to crawl back into the hole he was in before, turn himself inside out, and walk away. It was really fucking hard to squash that instinct and bury it as deep as humanly possible, but he does it because he’s felt the warmth of patty’s embrace and her tenderly curious gaze and there is no way he's letting that go.

Even though patty is the inexperienced one, Simon feels like a virgin. It’s the small moments that make him think he's back at square one. Waking up in bed with patty when she's still asleep. Just watching her breathe, seeing her chest rise and fall in an almost inconceivable way. Her overgrown bangs sprawled out across her forehead, long enough to be peaking into her eyes. Little bags under her eyes, mouth open a little. He can feel her breath on his arm, he’s never been more grateful to hear someone snore. Or maybe he's driving around with patty in his truck, which he kinda never gave it back (patty kept it warm for him while he was away), holding her hand and answering her questions while listening to her demos. Picking her up from work and making out in the back seat. Sitting on her bed watching her write her songs while he smokes a cigarette. Letting him get the first listen and mixing it up together. she’s picked up a few things from him, not so shit at the drums anymore. The feeling in his chest that’s too powerful to brush off.

He’s never been so close to someone, physically and emotionally, it frightens him a little. Think of when he tells patty he's john q but times a billion. When they lay in bed together after sex it's the polar opposite of any other post coital experience he's ever had. The I love you that's left on their tongues like the aftertaste of a cigarette that lingers for hours. They chat about whatever, trivial shit, it's what unsaid that makes it really fucking special. The promise of the future tangled in between them, trickling into their minds with visions of moving in together, making music together, just existing together outside of the watchful eyes of everyone else. Loving and coveting uninhibitedly.

Patty is the same but also completely different. She doesn't really have a problem with the emotional intimacy. She bares her heart to him right off the bat, sharing her quirks and habits. It’s harder with her words, she can’t ever really find the right ones. Even if she does it’s hard to string them together in a way that truly represents how she feels. Her affection for Simon comes out in her music. The lyrics and the sound she envisions as she writes shows the love she holds for him. You can see it in her expression too when she performs, searching for his face in the tightly packed crowd. Staring him down and singing the notes that crawl into his ears and travel through his veins to his heart and down to his dick. She’s never had anyone treat her the way Simon treats her, like she's his equal.

Just experiencing Simon for two days brought her out of her shell, but being with him day after day completely transforms her. She feels grateful to Simon for this; the adoration isn't one sided, she's got it just as bad as he does. Everything reminds her of him. Sissy and Karen tells her she sounds like a broken record, it’s Simon, Simon, Simon 24/7. When she's on her lunch break walking around outside the plaza where she works, she strolls past some guy smoking a cigarette. She smiles wide and bright, it reminds her of Simon. Of when he comes back inside at night after smoking outside, she kicks him out because her dad won't stop sneezing every time he walks into her room, cold and reeking of smoke. Breathing him in as she wraps her arms around his dirty green jacket and muscular body. Or maybe she sees a lighter on the ground while waiting for the bus, or a cloud that looks like his haircut. She sees his beauty everywhere she goes.

It’s the physical intimacy that she struggles with at times though. At first it’s intimidating being with Simon, he might be unnerving to most but the man gets around. It makes her nervous to surrender herself completely in such an intimate way, especially to someone who has done this a million times with a million people. But it's the way that he never makes her feel less than for not knowing or being a little shy that helps her come out of her shell. Even if she’s not the most experienced she still has a few tricks up her sleeve. Simon can get the same way too. When it's hard and fast, easy peasy, he’s well versed in that department. When it's long and painstakingly slow with shuddered breaths and I love you’s tumbling into the air around them, he gets a little freaked out. Once he gets over it, it consumes him, he can't get close enough. Patty too. They're inextricably connected in every metaphysical way possible.

i use the word love way too many times in this omfg. please bare with me this is literally the first thing i’ve ever written ever 😭 if u don't like it pls lie to me

[bits-and-babs]

𝐓𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐀𝐈𝐌 — 𝐒𝐈𝐌𝐎𝐍 ‘𝐆𝐇𝐎𝐒𝐓’ 𝐑𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐘

↳ summary: prompt: “That’s so fucking hot.” — Paired with Ghost on a 'drill' mission, you get to witness his sniping prowess first hand.

↳ pairing: Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley x f!Reader (Delta)

↳ [1k] content: 18+ MDNI. Utterly self-indulgent. Shy reader (because I fancied something different), firing guns, very vague power play, very light degradation (barely there but it’s there), fingering, cum eating (don’t know if this counts but I’ll put it anyway), Ghost is very skilled with a gun.

ghost masterlist I| main masterlist |I join taglist

Easterly winds trace the curve of your cheek and gently waft your hair across your forehead. The pitch blackness that hangs in the nighttime desert air swallows you whole, your defensive spot illuminated only by the waning crescent moon. It's fucking freezing, you're tired, and you'd been staring down a sniper's scope for over six hours.

You’d already decided that whoever thought a sniper drill was a good idea was going to face your wrath in the morning.

Settled into the sand grains beside you is Ghost's hulking frame. His patience is remarkable, settled on his front with his finger fixed on the hairpin trigger of the HDR. He's not moved once since getting into position, the vaguest sign he was even alive being the blink of his eyelids. He doesn’t even need to practise, and you’re convinced he’s been paired with you simply because he pities you being a shit shot. 

"Do you not have pins and needles?" You grumble, the crosshair in your field of vision blurring into a shapeless mush after gazing at it for so long, "I swear I've got a dead leg."

"No." Simon's answer is definitive. You're unsure if you believe him at first, but he squeezes the trigger without warning. The gun cracks, firing its round, and you almost jump out of your skin at the sudden break of silence. "What the fuck, Simo-"

Disbelief stalls your loud complaint, the image of a body-shaped target with a bullet hole dead centre of the cross in the inner circle's fixed point making your jaw drop. 

Simon settles back, shedding the shell casing from the HDR and effortlessly loading a second round. It's like breathing for him, the sniper rifle like a body part that worked as seamlessly as his arms or legs. 

It slips out, your inner dialogue somehow managing to worm its way out of your lips before you can swallow down the mortifying comment. 

"That's so fucking hot..."

Simon doesn't seem to respond at first, but your cheeks are already heating up in embarrassment as you try to backpedal. "I mean- I mean, I'm sure most girls at home would find that really hot! You must have so many girls asking you out when you go home- Half of Manchester, I bet!" 

You laugh awkwardly, holding your own sniper weapon in a death grip. You wish the sand would sink beneath you, dropping you into the depths below. 

"Not really," Simon's rumbling voice cuts through the desert silence. It makes your humiliation even worse, and you squeeze your eyes shut and plan to request a transfer with Captain Price the moment you return to base. Or even hand in your resignation letter. You'd never have to fear running into Simon on another team that way—

"Delta," Ghost's gruff voice cuts through your downward spiral. You open your eyes and glance over at him apprehensively. He's still staring down the scope of his rifle, mask concealing his expression from you. Undoubtedly he was enjoying making you feel stupid.

A heavy hand settles on the back of your thigh, and you suddenly exhale the oxygen in your lungs as though someone has popped the membrane with a pin. Ghost doesn't look up from the scope; his attention is focused on the target over seven-hundred meters away. 

"G-Ghost-" Your voice tremors, and you wish you could blame it on the chill in the desert air. Instead, it's Simon's palm slowly tracing up your thigh, palm squeezing gently at the globe of your ass. 

"Quiet," he orders, and you nod quickly, falling in line at the sound of his authoritative 'lieutenant voice'. He continues his advance, pushing his fingertips under the waistband of your khaki cargos at the small of your back. 

Simon hesitates. He offers you a chance to wave him off, but you can't think of anything worse— he's touching you, sparking your skin hot beneath his slow, deliberate touches. 

Breaching the waistband of your pants, he ensures that he inches his hand below your panties, too, fingertips tracing the naked curve of your ass as they continue their descent. You whimper softly, impatient, but the sound dies in your throat when you see Ghost's irises flick to you in a warning. 

Quiet, I said. 

Swallowing back any more noises of complaint, you spread your legs ever so slightly for him. A rumble of content sound from his chest, and Simon aims his sight down the scope of his rifle again. 

Simon's fingers sink into your fluttering cunt from behind. The stretch alone has you biting down on your knuckles in an attempt to smother the yelp that threatens to breach your mouth. 

What makes it worse is Simon's blatant nonchalance. He adjusts the positioning of his Sniper to mitigate the desert breeze with one hand. Meanwhile, his fingers sink deeper into you, easing in and out until you hear the slick sounds of your cunt swallowing his digits. 

It's pathetic. Ghost'll probably taunt you relentlessly for it, but you rock back onto his hand as his fingers tease your spasming walls. 

"O-Oh, fuck-" you choke out, breathless, as you lower your head and brace against the rising bliss in your abdomen. Again, Ghost's eyes flick over, cautioning you. 

"I'm tryin'a focus," he scolds you flatly, pushing his thumb into your clit harshly. You yelp at the sudden pressure, the arc of pleasure that whips up your spine. 

"W-What can you possibly be fo-ohh-" you moan out, losing your sentence as he slowly begins to circle your clit with his battle-calloused thumb. 

"On this," Simon hums, and again the crack of his sniper rifle jolts your body in shock. Fuck- but he keeps rubbing at your clit, sinking his fingers deeper into you as he searches for your g-spot. 

Your head whips up as your cunt flutters around his digits, looking down the scope. Again, Ghost has hit the target perfectly— slap bang in the middle of its forehead. 

Honestly, you could have cum from that alone, but Ghost's fingers are retreating just as your orgasm surges. You whine loudly, looking over your shoulder to see him remove his hands from your pants despite your protests and use his thumb to push the bottom of his ski mask over his mouth. 

Sinking his fingers into his mouth, he groans as he tastes you. It's the most sordid sound you've ever heard, the noise settling deep into your abdomen as you watch him lick his fingers clean. 

Simon knows what he's doing, knows he has you on the edge of a mind-shattering orgasm, but ignores your heavy breathing and desperate gaze to nod his head at the target. 

"Your turn. Best stop your hands from shaking, love. Get him between the eyes, and I might let you cum."

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[deathmetalunicorn1]

Hello!! I finally got to request 😭😭... Its a long one but what if after the Ragnarok Tournament, where after everyone was revived and the Humans won, a trio was formed? Basically,

Thor & Reader & Lubu,

Sasaki & Reader & Poseidon,

Jack & Reader & Heracles,

Hades & Reader & Qin

Nikola & Reader & Beelzebub

Odin & Reader & Simo

The Reader is the Human Fighters Valkyrie, and is extremely beautiful but also have a sassy attitude. Both of the human and heaven fighters are inlove with her but none have made their move until reader start getting hit on by her admirers. She manage to get out of the situation by lying that the human fighter is their boyfriend, but one day the same admirer come again, determine to at least get a date but accidentally screw up and this happen...

How will the Gods and Humans react? I do imagine they actually decided to go into a relationship, all 3 of them though, lol 😂

-The two men you called your lovers didn’t start out that way, you were a Valkyrie, one who as willing to give your own life to become a weapon for humanity against the gods.

-When you fused with (Human), it felt so right for the both of you, it felt so warm, so beautiful, and he almost instantly fell for you.

-(God) had loved you for a long while now, as he was taken by your feisty personality, you always spoke your mind and he had to admire you for that. However, seeing you soul bonding with a human angered him, he felt like (Human) was taking you away from him!!

-As the two men fought, they bonded as well, learning about each other, and by the end of their fight, which left all three of you heavily injured, they had respect for one another, and when they learned of the feelings they both had for you, they had agreed to share you, they just had to somehow convince you, as you were notorious for refusing dates, not wanting to bother with romance.

-That’s what led to this predicament you found yourself in; unlike others who asked you out, usually taking your rejection lightly, there was one, Kand, an earth god, who was persistent and annoying!

-You had been walking around with (God) when he approached, asking you out on a date and he was trying to refuse your rejection this time around, not wanting to take no for an answer.

-It was only when you grabbed (God’s) arm, pulling it to your body, “This is my boyfriend, I’m not interested!”

-Kand was stunned, seeing (God), and while (God) was stunned by your words, he realized that you were using him to get this pushy minor god to back off as he instantly glared, making Kand back off and run.

-When Kand approached you two days later, you were with (Human), and once again, he was being persistent, but as (God) approached, as the three of you were going out for a meal together, you grabbed (Human’s) arm, “This is my boyfriend!”

-Kand paused for a moment before glaring, pointing at (God), “You said he was your boyfriend he other day!” the two men looked down at you, curious as to what you were going to do next.

-They hadn’t expected you to grab (God’s) arm, pulling it to your other side, “He’s my boyfriend too! Got a problem with it?”

-Kand fell to his knees in anguish as (Human and God) were surprised by your words before you kept ahold of them and led them away.

-When you went to pull away, they grabbed your hands, holding on to them, which surprised you as they both smiled down at you, telling you that the three of you were going on a date, and as your boyfriends, they were going to treat you.

-You hadn’t expected them to be okay with this accident, but you weren’t complaining, finally accepting a date as the three of you headed off.

-Thor and Lu Bu- Had been surprised by your bold declaration, but you weren’t bothered by it, so they weren’t either. They had a strong bond between them, being so alike, being strong warriors, and you were their third.

-Poseidon and Kojiro- While Poseidon was elated at you finally accepting his proposal to date, Kojiro was a little shyer, as he wasn’t well versed in dating. Kojiro tried to back out, “You don’t need an old man like me. You two have fun!” this didn’t fly with either you or Poseidon, who each grabbed one of Kojiro’s hands, putting him in the middle, not willing to let him walk away. Kojiro was flattered but it took a bit for him to be comfortable.

-Hercules and Jack- Jack was initially hesitant on being your boyfriend, as he felt like you deserved better, not a killer like him, but both you and Hercules, who thought of Jack as a kindred soul now, refused to let him leave. You were both a bit exasperating, but Jack adored you both as you told him that he wasn’t leaving and that you were a trio, you were all partners. Jack couldn’t help but smile, seeing the kind souls that he found himself blessed with.

-Hades and QSH- Hades had his hands full with the two of you, QSH did what he wanted when he wanted while you had no filter, but he couldn’t imagine a day without both of you driving him crazy. QSH wasn’t bothered by having multiple partners, he was used to it from his time as emperor, when he had several consorts at one time. You definitely had your hands full with the two of them, as they were so different as far as personalities are concerned, but you enjoyed every moment spent with them.

Beelzebub and Nikola- Nikola was such a sweet baby boy, as he had been a lifelong bachelor, as he always saw women as something that needed to be respected and cherished and that he wasn’t worthy. Beelzebub was initially afraid of getting close, not wanting to hurt either of you, but with the three of you working together on each other, the relationship flourished, and you all found happiness you never knew that existed.

-Odin and Simo- Odin was initially hesitant, despite his feelings for you, as he was worried you wouldn’t be happy with an old man like him, and Simo, being a lifelong bachelor, was a bit shy in the dating scene. You definitely had your hands full with them, but you kept them both grounded, reassuring them that you wanted to be with them, and they believed you, because you wouldn’t hesitate to tell them otherwise.

[11queensupreme11]

I know you just said you haven't written about the human fighters yet, but can you guess how they would react to Perthonius? 🥺

i hope you weren't hoping for a serious answer cuz i had too much fun with this 😭

here's what i think they'd say if they knew about perthonius

(also, i only did the humans who have shown up in the manga, so i didn't do simo and rasputin unfortunately 😞 no kintoki either cuz i find it hard to care about him IM SORRYYYYY)

adam: "you're too young for a boyfriend, sweetie 🙂"

nikola: "if he's so smart, why couldn't he teach you fractions? 🤨"

lu bu: "do better 😐"

nostradamus: "were you just desperate? it's okay, you can be honest with me 🥺"

qin shi huang: "see, i would NEVER raise my child to settle for less which is why you should sign these adoption papers! 😃📝"

raiden: "but he's white???"

sasaki: "awww, young love! you guys are cute together 🥰"

okita: "so there was really no one else? 😃"

jack: "oh what a charming young man 😊"

leonidas: "oh hell no not this fucking ***** *** ***** ** ***** * ******* WHAT THE ABSOLUTE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING PERCY, AN ATHENIAN SCUM????? REALLY????? NO FUCKING WAY YOU CAN DATE THAT PIECE OF SHIT I SWEAR TO GODS YOU'RE GROUNDED IDC IF YOU'RE NOT MY KID, YOU'RE GROUNDED OHMY FUCKING GODS THIS IS THE WORST PERSON YOU CAN DATE. ATHENA'S SON???? YOU COULD HAVE ANYONE YOU WANT AND YOU CHOSE THAT THING?!?!??!! I WILL LITERALLY OFFER YOU MY ENTIRE ARMY AS YOUR HAREM OF BOYFRIENDS IF YOU BREAK UP WITH THAT LOSER RIGHT NOW. RIGHT FUCKING NOW, OR I'LL—"

[ateliersss]

Favourites - Part 1

Pairing: Simon Riley x Fem!Reader Summary: Falling in love with someone as stunning and selfless as you as a man like him with an unstable life and an emotionaly distant personality was foolish, hopeless, because how could you ever feel the same? Cross-posted on AO3: here Warnings: English isn't my first language Word Count: 1,346

The Blue Angel club was bustling with both, regulars and newcomers, as always on a Saturday night.

The air was filled with hushed chatter, here and there the high-pitched laughter of one of the girls. The room was dimly lit except for the stage, drawing all the attention of the audience to the platform in the middle of the club and to the woman dancing on the pole.

Music accompanied you as you perform your newest creation in a black leather bodysuit with the very short skirt sewn to it barely covering your ass. Here and then, you swirled around the pole and revealed the flesh poorly hidden underneath the fabric.

The men, some drunk and some still sober, were watching and enjoying you. Those who sat or stood closest to the platform threw dollars at your feet as they watched you turn and spin around the pole.

Out of the corner of your eye you could see the 10, 20, 50 and even a few 100 dollar bills. You knew you were the best and you were getting the confirmation according to it. You put passion in your dance to show the world that you were worth their time and money, and with the way this night was going it was nothing but the truth.

The crowd cheered for almost every movement or step you made, every shake of your body a spectacle that was pulling everyone into your spell.

Your moves were so sensual, so sexual, as you bent down with one hand on the pole above your head while the other dragged up the back of your thigh as you slowly straightened your body again. You reached your ass and brushed the skirt up, revealing the full globes of your bottom and the black string of the bodysuit teasingly to the audience.

Expecting nothing else as a reaction, the crowd erupted into loud whistles and cheers as the money started to pile and even slipped down the platform. Some of the patrons were even standing up from their seats to get a better view, drooling at the sight of you.

There was only one man who was, like always, quietly watching you with no visible emotion in his eyes.

Simon Riley had returned to the club tonight to see you again, like he always did when he returned from a long leave. He watched silently and calmly, unlike the rest of the audience around him, as you went through your performance.

There were times when he couldn't help but think of how beautiful you were, how much he wanted to just have you for himself, but that was just a silly dream. He knew you were off limits, as you were a stripper and he was nothing more than a customer of your service.

As soon as you ended your show, you started your short journey over to Simon's seat, like always.

On your way, you were asked four times for a private dance, but you declined each of their requests. You had never entered the private rooms with a man who wasn't Simon.

When you finally reached him, he greeted you with that deep voice of his, laced with a heavy accent even though he only said your name.

"Hey baby." You cooed at him with a bright smile before you plopped down on his lap and wrapped your arms around his neck. "And? Did you like my new routine?"

Simon's eyes remained glued to yours. "You were good." He answered, simply and plainly.

Already used to his bluntness and lack of heartfelt emotion, you accepted the words with a big smile. "Aww, baby, thank you."

Simon looked down to you as you sat comfortably on his lap like you had always belonged there. It almost made him want to pull you even closer to him and kiss you, hold you in his arms, feel your skin against his.

That specific thought only lasted for a split second before he returned to reality.

You were a gorgeous woman, a wonderful woman, and he was just... Simon... nothing. Even if he was clearly your favorite, it was a silly dream, a stupid fantasy.

"Ready to go to our room?" He asked as if this was simply another transaction, business and nothing more.

"Sure." You jumped up and took his hand to lead him through the slightly crowded space.

As Simon's imposing figure followed you like an intimidating shadow, he couldn’t help the feeling of how right his hand felt in your much smaller, much softer one. He mused about how it would be if it was just the two of you, together, like a real couple.

He pushed those desires away, just like he did with the thought from earlier.

Inside the room you always used, you asked the question he already had heard a dozen of times.

"The usual dance or special treatment?"

"The usual." He nodded.

"Of course, baby." You validated and pulled him to the black leather armchair standing in the middle of the room, watching him sit down.

You felt some kind of relief, knowing that he was doing alright and didn't need special treatment at the moment.

You place yourself between his spread thighs, your hands on your hips. "How do you want me, baby? Do you want me to keep the outfit on..." You played with the hem of your skirt, grinning mischievously at your next words. "Or do you want me to take everything off?"

"Keep it on." He replied in his usual monotone voice as he stared at you.

You leant down and used both of your hands to cup his cheeks.

"And what if I let you take it off?" You suggested with a smirk.

Your touch was warm, nice and comforting, but then again it reminded him of how alone he truly was. He had no one to love, nobody to hold, only a life of solitude and heartbreak.

He thought about how much he wanted you, wanted you so much it hurt.

But he couldn’t do anything about it. You were so bright and beautiful like the moon and stars in the night sky while he was merely a human stuck on earth, not being able to ever reach you.

That thought unironically was always on his mind as it was the cruel truth. He couldn't push it out, it just stayed there.

"No." Simon finally said, "Just keep it on."

He could swear he saw your smile waver a little and hurt flash in your eyes, but as soon as those things happened they were gone in a blink.

He was sure he must be wrong. Of course he was, because in the next second you had that sensual look on your face, moving your body to the music that suddenly filled the room.

Simon leant back in his seat and watched you dance between his spread legs, his eyes glued to you.

"You know you can touch me, baby, right?" You said softly, your hands already taking both of his to place one on the back of your thigh and the other on your hip.

It was a lie as the club had strict policies: never touch the girls!

But you didn't give a fuck, not when it came to Simon.

As soon as his hands touched that soft, flawless skin of yours, the desire to never let you go filled his mind. A selfish part of him, wanting to be the only one to touch you like this, to have you like this, whispered into his ear and reminded him that he, in fact, was the only one to touch and have you like this

You were proud on telling him that no man before him had been special enough for you to take them to a private room.

There will also be no man after him.

He wished this moment could last forever, but your dance soon came to an end.

He thanked you for your time, paid you and left the club, letting you return to work.

continue here with the second part.

[rosefuckinggenius]

Simo: Hey, Mimmo, do you want to play a question and answer game?

Mimmo: Yes, sure!

Simo: Cool, you start.

Mimmo: What's your favourite colour?

Simo: Triangle. Do you like boys?

[dcartcorner]

It's a very busy weekend over here, so I don't have a lot of time to do art! Instead, please accept this little fic based on the ghost!Peter and witch!Simon art. It's still a work in progress! And standard disclaimer writing is not my forte! -holds up peter and simon and elias- i just think they're neat. Apologies for any errors ^^

(Edit: Can be found on Ao3 as well)

Something Wicked (WIP) Characters: Simon Fairchild, Peter Lukas (more to come, including Elias Bouchard) Ship: None for now, but eventual FoggySkies (potential Simon/Peter/Elias? Who knows!) Warnings: none

There was a house in the middle of the woods. It was an old thing, with vines crawling up and over its walls and its arches, nestled between the tall, gloomy pines. It was entirely out of place, and yet looked like it could not have possibly belonged anywhere else. It was abandoned and had been abandoned for a long time - so said the nearby townsfolk who knew of it as a local legend - and saw as little sunlight as it did travellers. Peter knew of this house because it was where he lived, insomuch as ghosts lived anywhere at all. 

His ship, he recalled, had crashed along the rocky shores not too far away, and he’d wandered unknowingly into the woods, searching for help. He was not sure when, precisely, he realized he was dead. But it wasn’t as shocking as it perhaps should have been. 

Though, if pressed for a precise moment it became apparent to him he was no longer counted amongst the strictly living, he might have said it was when he came to the house and raised his hand to knock on the dark oak door, and his knuckles passed straight through, followed by his hand, and his wrist. He was not sure what he thought he should have felt, but he had to admit that a not-insignificant part of him felt relieved. No more people, no more eyes watching him, no more need for social niceties and exhausting daily interactions. It was peaceful, and, well, there was nothing he could rightly do about it in the end. So, he decided he would enjoy the solitary afterlife, and that would be that. 

After determining as much, he went inside, looking for nothing in particular, and he explored what he resolved would be his new home. 

He had not expected to find another body in it. But there it was, lying on a settee in what would have reasonably been considered a solarium if not for the dense covering of trees that smothered the windows above and all around. Peter paused and watched the unmoving body. A small figure, and old in appearance. Age must have claimed him. Peter suspected that other people might have felt sorry for this person if they found him like that, but Peter considered him quite lucky in his demise. It seemed peaceful enough, at least, and lonely. Peter stepped nearer, taking a closer look, and as he looked he wondered what the difference was - between passing over entirely or lingering on as a ghost. What made it so that this man rested there with no spirit, and he was left wandering the woods? That was, he supposed, one of the great questions of the universe. 

The answer to this question, however, would come to him very shortly after that thought crossed his mind, as he was watching the face of this stranger. Suddenly, the stranger opened his eyes. 

Peter reeled backwards. He watched as the man blinked a few times, as if waking from a daydream. 

“Oh,” the man said when sky blue eyes turned to Peter. “Hello.”

Peter froze.

“Now, now. No need to be shy,” the man said, sitting up with a huff and rolling his wrists. They cracked. “You are in my house, after all. I have to imagine it’s to see me. Don’t get many visitors otherwise. I’m not entirely sure why.” A chuckle. “But there you have it.” Still, Peter said nothing. “Well, if you’d like the short of it: no, there is nothing I can do for your condition. Dead is dead, isn’t it. Well, except for when it’s not. But you are dead. Dead, dead. The sort of dead that can’t be fixed.  Terribly sorry.”

And that was how Peter met Simon Fairchild. Which was to say, against his will.

Then again, he supposed that was how he’d met most people in his life.

The man stood up and adjusted one of his cuffs. “Do feel free to stay as long as you’d like. Ghosts make for good guests. Less trouble than werewolves, let me tell you. After the last time I said to myself, I said, ‘Simon, no more taking in strays. You’re too busy for that.’” He sighed amenably. “Never take my own advice, it seems. 

“You can see me?” Peter asked, because he did not know how else to contribute to the conversation the man - Simon - seemed insistent on having. 

“Oh, yes,” replied Simon, moving past Peter to a globe bar. “You spend long enough Looking, you end up seeing quite a bit.”

“And… you can hear me?” Peter asked.

Simon looked over his shoulder at Peter. “Oh, yes. You spend long enough Listening, you end up-”

“I… understand,” Peter said, holding up his hand to stop him. 

Simon smiled, and turned back to his task of pouring himself a drink. ��I’d offer you one, but it wouldn’t do you much good. One of the very great misfortunes of ghostliness. So, what’s your name? How did you turn up in my neck of the woods?” There was a pull in Simon’s words. Something… compelling, which gave Peter pause, for he’d felt such a thing a long time ago. Perhaps that was why he was able to ignore the question. 

“Are you a witch?” he asked instead, for that was what his mother had been, and she’d often used that same sort of compelling way of speaking to get her way in the house, and those were unhappy times.

Simon paused and slowly glanced over at Peter, smile faltering in surprise. Then a huff of breath that sounded like a chuckle. “That’s what they call me over in Scrimshaw, at least,” he said, “amongst other things.” He lifted the drink - something golden and dark - to his lips and watched Peter with eyes through which the sky seemed to fall. “Doesn’t much stop them from demanding potion and poultice and miracle cure-alls whenever I drop by.” He put on a voice and went on, “‘Look there, a witch for the fire!’ they say. ‘Oh but first, kind witch, mightn’t you help me with this rash? Come for tea, I’ll tell you all about it.’” He sighed in a long-suffering sort of way and resumed his normal tone, saying, “Makes you wonder, doesn’t it.”

It didn’t, but Peter did not say as much. 

“So, must I ask you again for your name?” Simon inquired. 

“Depends on what you want it for,” Peter replied. 

“My, my, but you are a quick one, aren’t you?” Simon said. As he did, there was a ruckus and a great, black raven flew into the solarium from a doorway behind Peter, and landed itself atop a crooked perch. It looked down at Simon with a glassy eye that reminded Peter of volcanic stone. Simon ignored it. “Close encounter with a witch before?”

“My mother,” Peter supplied. 

Simon clicked his tongue. “Ah,” he said. “Very sorry. Well, you have my word, it’s for nothing more than satiating my own curiosity.”

That seemed well and good, and so he said, “Peter Lukas. Captain… Peter Lukas. Of the Tundra.”

“Captain,” Simon repeated with what Peter thought might have been a hint of delight in his voice. “Not very often I get to meet a captain. How wonderful. That was your wreck on the northern shore, then? Horrible disaster. One has to wonder how something so dreadful came to be.”

“There was a fog,” Peter said. He looked up at the raven. It did not seem to notice him in the same way that Simon noticed him.

Simon’s smile vanished. “A fog,” he repeated, and he was silent for a long moment, thinking about something. “I see…”

Peter took this silence as a mark against his character, and so he frowned, brows furrowing together, as he said. “It was unnatural. Fog like that, not the best sailor in the world could have found their way out of it.”

Simon blinked slowly. “Ah, no. No, no, you mustn’t think I’m slandering you.  The fog is quite… unique, in these parts. Has a will of its own, you might say. I dare say there was nothing you nor any soul upon your ship could have done to prevent the outcome.”

“Hm.” Peter was satisfied enough with that. 

Simon put his drink down. The raven quwork-ed. “I do hate to cut this introduction short,” he said, and he seemed… wary. Though of what, Peter couldn’t say. The mention of the fog seemed to have soured his mood. “But there’s a… house call, I should make.” The smile flickered across Simon’s face again. “Make yourself at home. I’m sure you’ll need some time to become… acquainted with your new situation.” He began to move towards the door with a speed Peter would not have expected of someone of Simon’s age. “Happy haunting.” And with that, he was gone. 

Peter stood in the solarium for a good long while, watching where Simon had left before he turned his gaze about the room and to the trees outside, watching the mists dancing through the pines. And, with nothing else to do but wander, so he went, and began to learn the halls of the house in the woods. All things considered, it was hardly the worst sort of afterlife. 

[tamorisana]

Just a little bit more, please.

Tags :Fluffy, sleeping together, little suggestive??

Pairing :Ghostsoap

Notes :It's just a light one before the nuclear second part of 'After'.

[——————————————————————————————————————————]

Waking up isn't exactly nice.

Soap absolutely fucking hates mornings. And waking up.

He hates leaving his little secure world of dreams for routine. Boring, monotonous, dull routine. New task, new mission, new possible injuries. Like the one on his right shoulder.

But today is different. Fundamentally different.

You see, waking up half-naked, being spooned by his lieutenant isn't exactly a usual thing. But not unappreciative. Hearing Simon's breathing again his hair, arms and warmth around him is... something.

Besides it all was wonderful.

Until it wasn't.

A knock on the door was so loud it felt inappropriate.

"Soap? Everything alright? Can I come in?" Is heard from the other side of the door. Darn you, Price. Oh God, how much he hates it, Johnny just wants to sleep, to forget about the wound on his shoulder, to cuddle with Simo— And then it hits. He is half naked, snuggling with his lieutenant and Captain is about to walk on them.

Holy shit.

They are fucked.

He doesn't think he ever got up, dressed, and at least somehow presentable that fast. Five seconds and he opens the door before Captain, right on fucking time because the man behind it is already reaching for it.

"G'morning, you need something?" Oh god, he hates this. He wants to go back to bed and his shoulder is acting up again.

"No, just needed to check on you. You didn't show up for breakfast, thought your cut opened and bled out. Figured out you might use one." Price leans on one shoulder using the door frame as support. God, he probably looks like a mess. A sleepy one too.

"So caring, Cap, I'm touched. Everything is alright, just slept in" Soap rubs the back of his head, going through his now long, uncombed hair. Simon said it's nice, so he keeps it this way. He needs a good shower once the stitches are healed.

"Alright, alright. You are desperate for sleep and rest so go do that, medic wants to see you and stitches in the evening by the way" He pushes himself up and moves away, Price turns away starting to move suddenly stopping "Did you see Ghost?"

Huh?

Oh, he did.

Different poses, angles and even his face on his own coc—

Shush. Answer.

"Aye, he went back to his room yesterday, didn't he?"

He didn't.

"Probably, didn't see him anywhere today. Okay, sleep. Now."

Oh no. His dad mode is on.

"Yes, sir. Good night..? Good morning??"

Soap stepped a couple steps back, chuckling as he did so. Already closing the door, going straight to bed, sliding under warm covers next to the still-laying body giving all of that warmth. Fucking furnace.

"Where were you" grumpily heard from Ghost– no. Simon as he turned to face Johnny, snuggling closer, showing and letting him see the men behind the skull mask. Trusting him so much and probably praying for him not to destroy what's left of Simon.

"Price got scared I reopened the wound and died from blood loss since I didn't show up for breakfast " answer was quick to roll of Johnny's lips as he started gently rubbing circles on the bigger man's back, trying to get him to relax and get more sleep as it's a rare occasion for Simon to actually sleep. "He is looking for you, by the way"

"Old man can wait. Sleep." there was not even a pause between the two sentences but Scotsman doesn't focus on that, breathing on his neck and big hot hands on his waist and hips are way more... interesting.

He definitely will try his best to put pieces of what's left of Simon together and fill in the missing parts.

[——————————————————————————————————————————]

Look at me working. Working hard to please yall the best I can.

For the love of god its 3:20 as i write this. I need sleep not hyperfixation.

[simomo-the-smol]

Simomo Simo

B A S I C S

Name: Simomo Simo!

Nicknames: None.

Age: Mid-late twenties, I thiiiink?

Nameday: 21st Sun of the 4th Astral Moon.

Race: Plainsfolk Lalafell.

Gender: Agender really, has never had a thought about gender, it's something other impose on her, she is v much an any pronouns binch. She doesn't care what others register her as.

Orientation: Grey Ace, pan but rarely interested. Believed none of that was for her before she fell for Raha.

Profession: Adventurer, omni crafting artisan.

P H Y S I C A L     A S P E C  T S

Hair: Black with mid green highlights, fringe and ponytail.

Eyes: Green

Skin: A reasonably pale popoto, with white freckles.

Tattoos/scars: None visible

F A M I L Y

Parents: Her parents are farmers in Middle La Noscea, her father regularly making trips by foot into Limsa to trade. Humble family, employing former pirates looking to go "straight". As such, Simo has had a propensity for swearing since she was pretty young!

Siblings: None, Simo is an only child.

Grandparents: ???

In-laws and Other: In a relationship with G'raha Tia, not intrinsically mono, but has never thought about it one way or another. Views the Scions as family, and has a constant (platonic) companion in Rivi Feathersage @feathersage

Pets: Simomo's chocobo is called Greffie- named after Grehfar, the Yellowjacket Lift Attendant stationed in Bulwark Hall, Limsa Lominsa. Grehfar showed a little too much willingness to listen to little Simo's stories when she started venturing into the city on her own, and as such became Simomo's first proudly-declared friend of her own in the city.

Greffie is a pumpkin orange Belah'dian Jennet chocobo who has accompanied Simo into many battles and over varied terrain. His favourite food is curiel roots. Despite his diminutive size, he can hold his own in battle and in play with other 'bos.

S K I L L S

Abilities: Simo first learned arcanima when they began adventuring, inspired by the stories of their forebears, subsequently specialising into summoning. A chance encounter with a dance troupe who had arrived in Limsa. While at first discouraged by the troupe's flowy attire, Simo realised one could dance in all manner of garb, and has been throwing chakrams at ne'er-do-well faces ever since!

Hobbies: Foraging, as this is something done since Simo's childhood to supplement farmed produce, and in turn, crafting with said gathered materials. At the end of the day, there will always be a certain lure to the market board for a Lalafell, after all!

Simomo also spends a somewhat questionable amount of time in the Gold Saucer, especially enjoying tests of agility like the Cliffhanger and Leap of Faith GATEs.

T R A I T S

Most Positive Trait: Her giving heart, Simo will seldom turn from someone in need, lending a hand with even quite minor gripes even after battling to save the very star. She's generous with her time and complimentary to (almost) all.

Most Negative Trait: Zenos may have had a point... she does enjoy the fight. Not that she's ever admitted her answer to any of her loved ones.

Some may also argue the fact that she will put ketchup on pretty much any savoury foodstuff.

L I K E S

Colors: Hunter green.

Smells: Vanilla, cinnamon, sweet spices in general.

Textures: soft fabrics that move with her.

Drinks: She's partial to a cup of tea!

O T H E R    D E T A I L S

Smokes: Nope.

Drinks: Doesn't drink alcohol regularly, but can hold a surprising amount of drink due to the upbringing around pirates and in and around Limsa Lominsa!

Drugs: No.

Mount Issuance: Greffie, issued from the Grand Company of Limsa Lominsa, The Maelstrom.

Been Arrested: Simo has, thus far, always managed to talk herself out of sticky situations. Gods know how, given how goofy she typically is when trying to do said talking!

Tagged by: @feathersage

Not tagging anyone bc I think everyone's probably been tagged as I am late to the game, but if you see this and want to do it, I'd love to see yours, so pls tag me!

[alarrytale]

By 'fake baby' are you saying that his son is a hired child actor? I came across larry recently and I can see why its so believed in. It does seem like harry and louis were close in the band and potentially in a relationship but I don't get the insistence that louis's child is not real. What if larry just broke up in the early days and then later on louis got that girl pregnant? He could be bi instead of gay and larry could have just been a casual thing that got blown out of proportion by the fans into this forever soulmates idea? It just feels odd to declare that his kid was hired from birth and is still working (which is against some child labour laws at the least) as his fake child. At what point will this poor kid be let go from his job? Never?

I don't want this to seem like an attack, I just want to wrap my brain around the concept of a fake baby. Would you stop supporting Louis if you knew that his child was real? Do you think larries in general would still support Louis if they had the evidence they needed that that child is really his?

Hi, anon!

I'm happy to answer all your questions, but i hope you understand that to a larrie who's been here for 12 years and seen everything in real time, you sound like a first grader asking a uni student if they've considered that 2+2 might be 5 and not 4...

When you come in late to a fandom like this, you are missing a huge chunk of context. You are seeing every incident as isolated incidences, instead of creating a timeline, understanding the context it happened in, and seeing the full picture. When you do that it leaves you with no doubt.

Louis is not the biological father of F, but F exists. It's not illegal to believe you're the biological father to a kid, when there is no DNA proving otherwise, and you provide for that kid. It's just incredibly naive. There are no laws against being naive. There are also no law against making a deal between a label and a opportunistic family where payments for hiring the family and the kid is paid through child support money. Is it ethical? No. Illegal? No. If you can’t prove that harm has come to the kid through this deal (he's gotten rich as fuck and works two days a year) then you don’t have a case. I assume the deal is going to last until F is 18 years old (if Louis can’t get out of it until then), but F might want to continue to benefit from this deal after he's 18 years old, and extend the contract. So it will probably last until Louis can get out of it.

If Louis said he did a DNA test and that the result shows he's the biological father of F, then i'd assume that he either wants to be closeted for life, or that he really is the father. Either way, i would not be a fan of Louis anymore, no. Either he's willingly taking advantage of a kid without agency of their own to closet himself or he's a deadbeat dad. Neither is very appealing to me. I don't think it's very appealing to other larries either. Good thing he isn't a father and wants bg to end.

I know bg is hard to understand and wrap your head around. It seems so unneccessary and cruel. There is a reason why 1D hate Simo* Cowel* with the passion of a thousand suns.

To quickly answer your other questions;

Louis is gay (afraid of girl cooties kind of gay). He struggles to pretend to be into women, hence bg and no relationship with women for well over a year now. Larry is not in a casual relationship and they've never broken up. Check the timelines and ask yourself if you'd get half a sleeve of complimentary tattoos with a "casual" partner, or talk about your struggles together in the closet through rainbow bondage bears.

[fictionalmenxyn]

Winter Wonderland with the boys!

Summary: You, Ghost and your one year old daughter go see the boys for a winter catch up!

Tw: none!

–—–

It’s been a while since you, Ghost and your daughter Willow are going to see the boys since it’s almost Christmas and winter has finally arrived. You all decided to meet at your local Winter Wonderland, you were currently getting Willow’s coat on. You smiled “there we are, you’re all nice and cozy now, sweetheart.” She giggled as you placed her off the bench right by your front door. You heard steps behind followed by a “everyone ready to go?.” You nodded “yeah, let’s get everyone in the car.”

As you sat in the car on your way to Winter Wonderland, you felt at ease and comfortable. Music played at a nice level and the new car freshener is a Christmasy smell. So your Christmas spirit was set high. You felt Simon’s hand on your thigh, you hummed in content. He asked “are you going to go ice skating, love?” You shrugged “maybe, would you?” You looked at his concentrated face as he looks towards the small amount of traffic ahead. He hummed “Maybe, would they allow Willow on the ice?” You joked “I don’t quite know, maybe they have pushchairs with blades on them like a pushchair skate?” He chuckled at your joke.

You had arrived at the place, getting out of the car, you went to the boot. Lifting the boot door up of your car, you grabbed Willow’s pushchair and started to unclip it so it’d be useable. Once you’d done that, you grabbed the nappy bag and placed in into the little holder under the seat. Ghost opened Willow’s car door and started to unclip her car seatbelt. You could hear Simon talk to Willow “are you excited to see all your uncles? And we can get you some donuts to eat. How about some hot chocolate hmm? I think that sounds good huh?” He had his answer by your daughter giggling as she holds onto him.

You pushed the pushchair as Ghost holds your daughter. It’s a cute yet scary sight, cute as your daughter smiles up at her father and scary as if you go near his daughter; by how built Simon was, you wouldn’t mess with him.

You stopped Price so you shouted over “John!” He and Soap turned around knowing they shear the same name. You waved as the three walked on over to you three.

You greeted them and then they fussed your daughter. Price was currently holding Willow as she placed her small gloved hand onto his cheek and gave him a kiss on his cheek. You smiled at the sight, Ghost placed an arm around your waist and he suggested “Shall we go get some hot chocolate and find a place to sit down?” Soap spoke “sounds like a plan!”

You all found a less busy area that had a small coffee stand, you sat with Gaz as he had Willow sat on his lap. She couldn’t stop blabbering to him with made your heart melt. Gaz was talking to Willow and asking her what she wanted for Christmas and of course he was answered by her blabbering and squealing. You laughed and said “Gosh Willow! That was a big squeal.” Kyle joked “she must really want a princess dress then!” You heard a familiar voice “can hear Willow yapping from all the way over there.” You looked up and laughed. It was Soap who said that. You thanked and grabbed the hot chocolate from Simon. He took a seat next to you, you watched as Price walked over with a large box. He placed it down and said “there’s donuts and pretzels, they also have us some chocolate dip to go with them.” You smiled “sounds like a feast!”

As you were all tucking in you had grabbed a high chair for Willow. You would rip some pretzel and donut up and place it onto Willow’s high chair. Willow watched as you all were eating and chatting. She tilted her head and smiled as Price was taking a photo of you, Willow and Simon. Johnny joked “what a cute little family, eh?” You smiled and Simon chuckled. Willow stuck her two arms in the air cutely demanding for more pretzels.

Once you’ve all finished eating, you decided to all go ice skating. Price and Simon took Willow on a walk as Willow was too young and Price calms he’s ‘too old’ to skate. So you, Kyle and Johnny went skating instead.

Once the hour was up, you three met up with the two others. Deciding it was time to head home as Willow had fell asleep in Simon’s arms. You all said your goodbyes and headed home.

–—–

Hi hope you enjoyed, sorry I haven’t posted in a while! Hopefully I’ll be posting more! If you like sidemen or their friends if recommended checking out my other account ‘sidemenxyn’

As always have a good day/night!🫶

[ladyhindsight]

As I said in the end of my last piece of grumbling and groaning, the one great thing about this chapter—and one of the few good things in the whole book—is Clary finally getting in tune with her Shadowhunter senses and her training coming to fruition. And as I said also in the end of said piece of grumbling and groaning, everything else in this chapter is horrible and, frankly, gross.

We left the last chapter with a cliffhanger of demons attacking the Team Evil, so a not-so-enticing-as-per-usual battle ensues.

At this point Clary has studied and trained enough that she doesn’t need to justify her knowledge of Elapid demons from seeing an illustration sometime and somewhere. It also takes away from the urgency of the fight. Similarly to Clary fighting the Ravener in City of Bones.

The writing constantly tells and reminds the readers of how it is Jace who trained her. Alec does that too on his end (City of Glass, for instance), so leave this part out. I’m sure Clary has practiced enough by now so she can just throw it without constantly bringing Jace into this.

They kill the demons, Clary is a badass warrior now, and they secure the chunk of adamas. Well done, folks!

Cut to Simon and Isabelle arriving to Magnus’ living room.

So many characters in this book “pad” somewhere.

→ “He padded off to the kitchen” (Magnus) → “He padded off toward the kitchen” (Magnus, again leaving for the kitchen after skidding into the living room) → “padding back into the bedroom” (Clary) → “as he padded past her, barefoot, and down…” (Sebastian) → “He kicked his shoes off by to door and padded as quietly as he could…” (Alec)

They are ready to answer Azazel and summon him back. Jordan and Maia are also present.

What were the rules demon activity again? They can infiltrate the Earth through the cracks in the wards. Also most likely a nod to Magnus’ father being a Greater Demon, but did it say anywhere that the Greater Demons can only be summoned? That otherwise they cannot enter the Earth? Why though?

(Leviathan did not fit for his size but the rest are pretty much human-shaped. The new incarnation of Belial just appears on his own accord. And Azazel could not fully appear since he is physically trapped to a rock in some dimension.)

Magnus warns Jordan from stepping into the pentagram: Summon a demon and trap it in a pentagram, and it can’t get out to harm you. But step into the pentagram, and you’ve put yourself in the demon’s range of power —” And basically few paragraphs later:

→ It’s good that Simon can recognize that it’s Isabelle’s voice out of all the men, her, and Maia. Unlike Clary.

Simon has stepped into the pentagram while trying to catch Chairman Meow, and we are reminded of what was basically said on a previous page. No need. No thanks. We remember and understand the gravity of the situation without this.

→ …even Magnus looked unsettled. [paragraph division] There was a tap on Simon’s shoulder.

Azazel takes the opportunity to grab Simon.

If all is avenged sevenfold, Azazel didn’t really try or intend to do anything to Simon since all that happened was him being thrown backwards. Nice subtlety, since the writing generally is completely incapable of it.

→ Clary also makes belated realizations in the beginning of the chapter with the Elapid demons. How about use other words or phrasing.

Azazel then gets scared of the Mark of Cain on Simon and leaves on his own accord. Cut to Team Evil. Jace is helping Clary heal and clean up after the fight with the Elapid demons.

Which begs the question: Can Shadowhunters use mundane pharmaceuticals? Do they have any effect if the Shadowhunter is runed (obviously Clary wasn’t before)?

Hoped you liked it as much as fighting together with your parabatai, someone that was actually supposed to be of use in battles.

They clean up, Clary gets new clothes and the team Evil leaves to celebrate the seizing of the adamas.

Cut to Team Good who are considering summoning an angel, you know, for change. Magnus tells Simon about the prophetic dream of blood and destruction and blah while others are cleaning up the mess left by the summoning of Azazel.

I don’t think this point is recognized enough. But Simon just keeps being happy to sacrifice it all to Clary no questions asked.

The Team Evil arrives at the place of their celebration, Kosti Lustr or The Bone Chandelier.

And thank goodness you explained it all.

→ Clary shivered. Easy is the descent into Hell.

That’s all you need.

And we jump back with the Team Good because why not constantly change to point of view. Simon and Isabelle discuss the summoning of Raziel.

Which makes Simon the best of them all and consistent with his character that has had the ability to see the greater picture when needed. Mostly it’s about Clary and sacrificing for Clary, but as I said, when needed. He is also the only one who can do it and not die, so there’s that.

→ Also why Jace is the paragon of bravery here? As if there was a question of Simon otherwise being a coward.

I like the quote from ASoIAF: “Bran thought about it. 'Can a man still be brave if he's afraid?' 'That is the only time a man can be brave,' his father told him.”

It is what it is, sis. This is the result of Jace and Clary’s lies and secrecy and now other people have to pay for it. None of this would’ve happened if Clary and Jace were honest in the first place, but they never go far enough to note that. Clary and Jace are protected from anger, contempt, and enmity people might feel because they are now in this situation because of them, basically.

Not that Sebastian wouldn’t raise hell anyway, but Jace wouldn’t have been susceptible to Lilith in the first place, Lilith wouldn't have been able to lure Jace and so Simon in to raise Sebastian back to life, and then Jace wouldn't have been gone as a puppet to Sebastian—then Clary with them—if there wasn’t this huge secret they were keeping. Especially when the writing never justified the secret anyway. These characters don’t need to hate Jace or Clary, but they also don’t feel anything human or negative towards them because of their decisions.

Back to the bone party.

It’s all so performative.

No. Just no. We’re not doing any more of these “only Jace” things. Even if it’s through Clary’s eyes, because it implies that eeeveryone else in this whole existence looks like a fucking moron. And that is rude and a lie. And makes Clary's character all the more unlikable.

Unintentionally hilarious image of Clary just spinning around. What Clare is worse at that writing fighting scenes is writing people dancing. This actually makes me almost appreciate the fighting scenes.

The spine…

Angel girl is no more acceptable than angel boy.

What about names mothers choose? Are the faeries also patriarchal bastards for no reason?

So Sebastian has a secret meeting with Meliorn while Clary and Jace are going at it again. Clary then has a bad trip and sees scary things and faints because that is just the perfect way to end this terrible chapter.

[thenameswinter99]

For the emoji ask:

✨ Do you have any nicknames?

🎵 Last song you listened to?

🐰 What do you think says the most about a person?

🍪 If you were a cookie, what kind would you be?

🙃 What’s a weird fact that you know?

✨: Do you have any nicknames?

From my real name: Simo, Simon, Mona. From my nickname: Winter, Winterouse, Winterina, Winterz, Winty.

I'll spare you the embarrassing nicknames my mother gives me lol

🎵: Last song you listened to?

I've answered here by saying that I was listening to this song in loop. BUT I changed it, so thi is what I'm listening to now:

🐰: What do you think says the most about a person?

How they manage to make you feel comfortable. As a terribly shy person, I need to see that people are able to make me feel comfortable, otherwise I'll find it hard to talk to them. lol

There are lots of people who are sunny and manage to put you at ease simply by smiling.

🍪: If you were a cookie, what kind would you be?

🙃: What’s a weird fact that you know?

Did you know that the late Queen Elizabeth II didn't use to wake up with an alarm clock or a butler opening her curtains, but with bagpipes? Now you know it.

Since I tend to reblog like crazy:

ASK GAME HERE