#silent despair

[queerquillpoetry]

Moments In-Between

The moments in-between

Feel like a betrayal

Like I'm forgetting you

Already wiping the slate clean

Freezing the glass inside my chest

To numb the crystals of ice

I want to cry, but

I can't

Silent despair

[bittersweetresilience]

the great gatsby / kentucky route zero / koe no katachi / disco elysium / omori / night in the woods / homestuck / koe no katachi / l'étranger / disco elysium / firewatch / john dies at the end / everything everywhere all at once / the subtle art of not giving a f*ck

[thinkershipman]

SHAUNA SHIPMAN: AN ORESTEIA

[spahhzy]

Silentknight or Whiteknight.

I'm asking this cause I've got another one in the angst tank, but i don't know which pairing to choose from...

Jaune won't die in this one!...for now.

I would do a poll, but I'm dumb and can barely operate the mobile app.

So would you kindly...choose for me?

[kiwibongos]

bla bla something about having a high status and heavy responsibilities, never learning how to process trauma or their own feelings in general, barely being able to take care of themselves due to looking after the others because they feel like they must be selfless leaders since they're the most physically capable in recovery out of everyone else after the game (but not mentally), but sometimes it just becomes too much.

they may suck with feelings but they understand eachothers pain

[asteropewpew]

me: i have no fear

my brain: what if orv webtoon still kept yoo joonghyuk's default face and not frame his expression being in abject despair while he cuts the demon king of salvation down with that heavenly sword of gathering clouds

also my brain: what if orv webtoon also takes out yoo joonghyuk pettily ignoring the inevitable when kim dokja asked him to take out 'that' thing and yoo joonghyuk played dumb and went 'huh the what now i don't know what you're talking about'

me: okay i have MANY fears about the dark castle arc happening in orv webtoon

[turbo-autism]

I love when people write the other survivors of sdr2 taking quite a while to get used to Hajime post neo world. like you dont just get over the fact that your friend is now kinda scary and can do anything and is super strong in a few days

[crosbyism]

Iirc sidgeno isn't your area of expertise but I just read "like a flashback" by ibear and thought of your current Sid masculinity kink musings. Basically it's a "what if Sid's gay awakening was shitty 70s porn and now he likes shitty mustaches a bit too much"

anon i know you did not intend to be, but this ask is hilarious. reading “isn’t your area of expertise” was like getting suplexed by a professional wrestler. i’m losing it. my baby. my baby girl. my baby boy. my baby baby. however your gender babies. i got my hrpf fandom undergrad in sidgeno. i was in the trenches. i’ve written sidgeno. for the exchange, even. i’ve read almost the entire sidgeno tag top to bottom. this is like telling steve yzerman “i know you don’t know much about wayne gretzky, having been on the red wings”. i’m crying

however i love that apparently it’s not clear that i’m a fandom old. this is so funny. imagine saying this to someone who’s been on hockeyblr and specifically pensblr for almost a decade. i was reading sidgeno before tk/nolpat existed. god. wow

sorry, sorry, to get back to your actual question. yes i’ve read iBear. was very into iBear for a while. it’s a fun fic. it’s definitely been a while since i’ve read it, wasn’t on my mind when the topic came up in my asks, but it’s very fitting for the recent masc kink discussions on this blog for sure (the characterisations aren’t really my jam any more, but tbf that was in the spacetoaster era of sidgeno). my iBear favourites were actually The State of Marriage and I Like The Way I Smell On You, (aside from a very specific one which was orphaned, iykyk, i’ve just been around long enough to remember when it wasn’t. lol), which i recommend reading if you haven’t yet and you’re in the process of reading your way through their catalogue

[quaranmine]

pick a book for me to take on work travel

Ends of the World by Peter Brannen - nonfiction geology book about earth's previous mass extinction events. The author is also the writer of one of my favorite climate history Atlantic articles I read for a college assignments.

Into the Wild by Jon Krakauer - nonfiction true story of Chris Mccandless, who decided to leave society to live in the Alaskan wilderness and was later found dead. I want to read Into Thin Air too but I don't have a copy (my mom probably does but that won't help me for this trip)

Dune by Frank Herbert - do i have to describe what Dune is about at this point? I've never read it and I also refused to see the movies 'caues I wanted to read the book before doing so

A Song for the River by Philip Connors - nonfiction/memoir by the same author who wrote my beloved fire lookout book Fire Season. This book also has to do that, as well as a massive fire he witnessed in his national forest, but I think it's a lot more about grief and death.

What the Eyes Don't See by Mona Hanna-Attisha - nonfiction/memoir by one of the doctors who discovered the Flint water crisis. I'm actually already 90 pages into it but got distracted and haven't picked it up for like a year. It's very good and highly relevant to my work (though I don't do lead in tap water but you know it's great information to have)

[365filmsbyauroranocte]

Un beau matin (Mia Hansen-Løve, 2022)  

[acknowledgetheabsurd]

Things are getting worse and worse here and the atmosphere is less and less breathable. That's why I sometimes hesitate and recoil from the overwhelming fatigue that a silent dinner represents, some evenings. This is also why I wait for other words than those of midday, when I finally come near you. Hearing you talk like this makes me despair, closes my mouth, makes me doubt everything, of your heart and of our love. Then begins the absurd hours, empty of everything, where I no longer feel capable of any control, nor of any will. I only have an insane desire to see you without delay while at the same time I hate you sometimes. That's how I am right now and the only choice that would save me would be to find you and your love again. So I come close to you, once again, more desperate than usual, maybe, today. Don't push me away, I want to live in my heart, don't doubt my love. Measure it on the contrary to all that it crosses, to the interminable sorrow where it puts me. Yes, I love you and I wish you knew how nothing could sadden you for a single second during your whole life.

Albert Camus to Maria Casarès, Correspondance, February 1950? [#221] 

[dolores-slay]

Let's be hashtag REAL with ourselves for a minute. Dragon Age ALWAYS had kinda cringey dialogue writing LMAO

[topazpearl]

SSSS + Screenshots of Despair part 3

[mushyroomyducks]

my cubito is finally dead I’m so happy I have been waiting for this for months:D

[dramarants]

Wanting more homoeroticism in the tension between the show’s leads as the narrative introduces greater intimacy and higher stakes between them, especially in a landscape that lacks queer representation who isn’t a villain or dies within one or two episodes, but also recognizing that core values/motivation for these characters lie in their relationships with one of two major female characters in an on screen sausage fest where the only other woman is a morally reprehensible femme fatale and erasing and/or vilifying female leads in favor of conventionally attractive males is a common practice observed in fandoms that’s rooted in misogyny and justified under the guise of rejecting heteronormativity, thinly veiled double standards, or claiming the woman is simply not interesting enough and not wanting to bolster that mindset

[seapasture]

I've always considered it one of, if not the album of all time anyway, but Absolution by Muse... Satosugu...