#sign of anger. i cant drive. im always in pain. im always sad. im always on the brink of tears. i cut myself and think about how to die

[the-sappho-of-lesbos]

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[scarletwidowaf]

Ghost Of You - Chapter 4

AN: this is my favorite chapter so far! Its Mostly fluff and wholesome. Again, didn't checked mistakes so I'm sorry in advance .

words count: 1880

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The two ex-avengers were lying on their motel shared bed.

The place was in a pretty good condition which was a nice change after the last 4 motels the group found themselves at.

Natasha was lying under the covers, her red long hair in a messy bun and a book in hand.

Next to her, Wanda was sleeping peacefully.

The younger woman was finally getting better after the brutal cold she suffered from in the last few days.

Natasha couldn't help but appreciating how cute and peaceful she was.

Her hair messy, nose red and cheeks flushed.

Thats how their evening went.

Wanda peacefully sleeping while Natasha reading a book and glancing at the younger woman every now and then.

At some point, when Natasha glanced at the brunette next to her she met with green eyes, who were watching her curiously

Natasha couldn't help but smiling at the sight in-front of her.

"Is everything okay?" She asked.

Wanda nodded weakly.

"You love reading, dont you" wanda asked.

"I do. It was something i loved doing ever since i was a kid."

"Why?"

"Many reasons, its comforting and enjoyable and in a way, its an escape, even if its just momentarily"

"Do you feel the need to escape?"

"Like right now? From this bed?" Natasha asked confused, a small smile on her lips.

Wanda smiled but didn't answer.

"So, What are you reading this time?"

"The Catcher in the rye. Its a classic"

"Is that so? Will you read to me?" Wanda asked, her cheeks getting flustered (even more than it already was).

"You dont have to of course, i didn't really thought how weird it might seem-" wanda ramble and Natasha smiled before moving her attention back to the book.

"That's the thing about girls. Every time they do something pretty, even if they're not much to look at, or even if they're sort of stupid, you fall in love with them, and then you never know where the hell you are. Girls. Jesus Christ. They can drive you crazy. They really can."

She read out loud, cutting the girl mumbling.

Natasha looked at wanda again.

The younger girl's body was pressed to her side, as she was clinging to her for warmth. Wanda looked at Natasha with a smile.

"Making sure I'm listening?"

"Something like that" she responded.

Wanda smiled at her. Her eyes sparkle.

That moment Natasha couldn't help but smile.

'Jesus christ', she thought, 'they really can'

____

"Natasha?"

Wanda felt stupid as she called Natasha's name into air.

How do you even call a dead person? She thought.

The young woman stood in the middle of the no where in particular, not far from her cabin.

A red pickup truck parks not far and its headlights illuminate the woods, where it begin to darkened.

The sun was half way down and the sky was painted in beautiful shades of orange, red and purple.

Wanda chose this spot because of the beautiful view it revealed, a small waterfall was pouring from a spot not far from her and into a lake. It was truly a sight.

Wanda really thought things trough this time.

she wasn't sure what the future holds for the two women but she was tired of wasting their precious time with fighting and crying over their bad luck. So she organized a date for them.

She spread a big mat on the floor and layered it with many blankets and pillows and even lit some candles around them, far from something that could catch fire yet close enough to light the space.

She even organized a picnic basket full of food and snacks natasha loved and some surprises for the date.

And most importantly she was definitely dressed to impress.

A high waisted skinny jeans, the ones who made her ass look extra good and she knew Natasha liked (she knew that since she wore it a few days before the snap when the two women traveled in the streets of Paris and natasha's thoughts were very loud while she walked behind her)

With a white top who didn't leave much space for imagination, cleavage and toned stomach were visible and wanda just hoped the weather will stay as warm as it was.

After shouting natasha's name over 10 times the younger woman got frustrated.

Wanda was about to give it up, sit and cry while eating cake but when she was about to turn around she met with Natasha smiling at her.

The older woman was dressed differently, which was odd, it seems like although she was dead she could do almost everything (except touching wanda which was frustrating enough), she could hold a book and read, she could eat food (although hunger was never an issue for her) and she could change clothes.

When they found out the older girl could do that natasha was pleased, relieved to change into something that wasn't the clothes she died with.

Natasha was leaning against wanda's truck, an amused smile painted on her red lips.

"You called?" She said with a lighter tone and wanda sigh in frustration.

"How long where you watching me like a creep, romanoff?"

"Long enough" natasha moved from tree to wanda's side. Her eyes scanning Wanda.

"I was just enjoying the view" she said. Her tone flirty.

To make things worse she even bit her lip, making wanda's cheeks grow red.

Wanda smiled before she sat on the pile of blankets and waited for natasha to occupy the spot next to her.

"Do I'm making you feel uncomfortable?" Natasha asked when she sat.

"Not at all nat. Im just not used to get this kind of attention. You were always holding yourself back and vision was.. you know.. vision" wanda confessed.

Natasha smiled softly.

"Well, i was a coward and vision was vision so.."

Both women smiled at each other. Their eyes sparkle with joy.

"So, what's up with the setting, not that I complain" the older women said as her eyes traveled to wanda's outfit.

"I wanted to arrange something for you. As a apology for bringing you back purely"

"You always arrange a super romantic date in the middle of the woods as an apology? Because if this is the case i think i deserve many of those after all this time"

Natasha joked and wanda rolled her eyes.

"You're an ass you know that?"

"Ive been told"

"So, what's in the basket?" Natasha asked.

Instead of answering Wanda opened it lid and pulled out the first item. A headpiece she made herself.

Natasha stared at the white flower crown with confusion.

"Why-" she started asking and wanda cut her off.

"I made this for you. For your birthday"

"Okay first of all: This is not my birthday and you know it, and two: you remember I'm dead, right?" Natasha said with a raised eyebrow, yet didn't show any sign of resistance when wanda put it on her head.

"I know its not your birthday, but I missed 5 years of life, so i think i deserve an extension"

Wanda couldn't help her smile when she saw Natasha with the crown. The older girl's cheeks were a bit flushed and she bit her bottom lip to hold her smile. Her green eyes sparkle with joy and warmth.

"I love it" natasha admitted

"Good, because there's a cake too"

"Of course there's a cake" natasha said in amusement.

Wanda smiled brightly before she turned back to the basket and started to take out the edible items in it.

Natasha couldn't help her staring, the younger woman was beautiful, just as she remembered and even more. The Wanda Natasha was looking at at this moment was not the same Wanda she remembered.

It was like wanda somehow managed to grow up at her absence and natasha couldn't help but appreciate the women she became.

"Are those burgers from bob and Amy's?" Natasha smiled and wanda nodded

"I know that they're your favorite" wanda said as she pass Natasha her burger.

"You're kinda perfect you know that?"

"Ive been told"

By the time they finished their burgers while holding a general conversation the sun was already gone and the only light that's been left was the from the candles and wanda's truck headlights.

"You should turn off your lights" natasha said with a smile and wanda did as she was told.

It was dark except for the soft candle light.

"Now i can barely see you" wanda pouted.

Natasha smiled.

"Dont pout. It makes me sad because i cant kiss it away"

Wanda stopped pouting.

"I think I found a solution for that" wanda said and natasha raised her eyebrow.

"I found out what went wrong in the first place and i think i can fix it."

"why me wanda? Why not your brother? Your parents? Vision?"

Wanda looked down at her lap, her eyes glitter with tears.

"Its been too long for them, there's only a short window of time where it can be preformed."

Natasha smiled sadly.

"I know there's a catch wanda. What will it cost?"

"Its nothing i cant handle"

Wanda whispered.

Natasha bit her lip.

"No"

Wanda's eyes widened.

"Nat-"

"No." The older woman repeated.

"So what? Do you want to stay like these forever and hurt the both of us in the process?" The pain was visible in wanda's eyes.

"Of course not wanda" natasha whispered while her eyes traveled wanda's face. Aching to touch it.

"Then what?" Wanda asked.

"I think you need to let me go."

"No."

"Wanda-" natasha tried her again but got cut off.

"I refuse to let you die" wanda said with anger.

"Im already dead wanda"

"You dont get it, do you? I love you! Let me save you. You said you're a selfish person natasha, than prove it and choose to stay"

Wanda's tears were smudging her makeup and natasha sigh in defense.

"I love you too"

"So stay" wanda begged.

Natasha smiled sadly at wanda before she pulled the basket to her lap and pulled out a small vanilla flavored cupcake wanda brought and took a bite of it.

"Theres something i wanna try. Close your eyes" she said and wanda looked at her confused.

"Just do it, ill be here when you'll open them again" natasha said before she took another bite.

Wanda did as she been told.

Before she could open her mouth to say anything she felt soft lips ghosting over hers and a hint of vanilla flavored cake.

The younger girl was taken back.

She could almost feel natasha's lips and if she tried hard enough she could almost feel her breath.

Almost.

When she opened her eyes she found Natasha taking another bite from the cake with a small sad smile tugged on her lips.

"That's the thing about girls. Every time they do something pretty.. ..you fall in love with them, and then you never know where the hell you are." (-the catcher in the rye)

[naptoons]

Triggered-Joel Pimentel

warnings: Sexual Content, Cheating,Mild Language, Alcohol reference.

Theme: Angst

A/N: this is a part two of story of us , this is requested by @cncogirl18 ! i hope it’s great and it meets your request!. Read the first part here!

joel and i have been getting more and more distant for the past 2 years. sometimes i blame it all on tour, sometimes i blame it all on maybe he’s cheating. maybe hes fallen out of love with me. but to be honest i blame it all on me. i pushed him away because im not ready for the limelight. im not ready for the flashing cameras and gosspi pages. most dont even know what i look like, they just thought i was a fanpage commenting under his posts all the time. some he didnt respond to so it didnt look so obvious.it’s been on my mind all day, even my friends noticed it, urging me to go home and talk to him about it. but i cant. maybe  cant because im afraid of the answer.

 leaning back in my chair picking at the peeling skin on my thumbs. debating going to joel’s apartment or heading to the party richard invited me to for his daughter. i might as well go home first, maybe get a nap. getting up from the chair, i grab my keys to his aprtment, heading for the door.

arriving at his apartment i walk in the house,hearing the noise of heavy breathing and muffled moans. the grunts that only i would know. but apprantly im not the only one whom knows it. biting the bullet of crying, i walk towards the living room dropping the keys in the bowl. after today i dont think i wanna come back. walking past the room to the bathroom i hear the voice of someone farmilar.

“i told you, you never loved her, you’d come back to me papi” emlila swoons him in, joel sighs with his feet shuffling against the carpet “why cant you admit it?!” she yells at him “she is nobody anyways why do you care so much?” feeling anger in my broken heart i swing the door open, gritting my teeth against my jawline, the atomsphere turning colder than stone.

“yeah joel, im fucking nobody” i choke through my clogged airways

“baby-” cutting him off i smack his hand away from my frame, i grab my back packing all of things “bre listen it didnt mean anything!” his voice breaking and pleading to get my attention, joel grabs my arm but i push him back making him hit the edge of the dresser groaning in immersed pain. but i feel no remorse.

“if it meant nothing why the fuck did you do it?!” i yell through the tears, i tried to be strong. to not cry in front of him. he didnt deserve my tears, he didnt deserve anything from me at this moment. “get the fuck away from me joel, i never want to see your fucking face ever again” grabbing my packed bag i place it on my shoulders before stepping out the room, i look back at emailia to see her smiling.

“you think you have everything right now, but if he did this to me, what makes you think he wont do it to you?” i pour my venom on her, her smile slowly falling flat and changing into anger “misery loves company, i hope you guys are miserable together karma is a bitch” with my words i feel my shoulders become lighter, running downstairs i hear joel yelling my name behind me, getting to the front door i slam it behind me getting in my car.

“what a fucking fool i am” i breathe out “thinking we could ever be something, neither of us was ready” i grab my phone calling lunay as i back out of his driveway, the tears begin to roll down my cheeks clouding my vision all i can see if dots of red and white lights.

“hola mami” lunay’s voice hones in on my ears. insatly my voice cracks trying to keep it together, i just break down and cry gripping the steering wheel as my knuckles drain the blood from them. “hey bre are you okay? where are you?”

wiping my face i inhale heavily “joel cheated on me” i let out “can i come over?” i ask, before hearing the answer all that fills my ears is the skid of tires on the road, and the reverb of a collision. The vision I once had colored like a void.

Pitch dark.

Opening my eyes to the angelic light, I groan as it burns my cornea, covering them with my fingers I sigh heavily. “Welp I guess that’s a sign to use night mode” I let out, slowly regaining my eyesight looking over at a puzzled wreck of a cousin. Smiling slightly I reach for his hand “hey, what’s got you so tangled up Charlotte?”

“You’ve been unconscious for three weeks, that’s what, and get a better joke that was corny” Christopher smiled slightly at the end, but I could tell that smile was fake. “And I’m wondering should I kill someone” his voice taking the form of malice.

“If you were to do that you couldn’t see your precious cousin” I smile followed by his scoff “wouldn’t say precious” he insults me. Lunay walls into the room sighing of relief “wow, did y’all really think I was going to die?” I laugh “y’all had no hope for me huh? What a sha...” getting my sentence cut off by his hug around my neck, I smile softly my fingers rubbing his back. “Hey you” I let out. He must’ve been so worried.

Lunay has been taking care of me for a whole month. I had to go to recovery, I lost a little bit of feeling in my legs so I started walking little by little, they also recalled my brain is a little fuzzy prior three minutes before the crash. Sadly it didn’t make me forget I got Joel cheating on me. With the girl who tried to break us up even before a label. I guess she got what she wanted. I haven’t seen or heard from Joel since that day. Part of me wants to reach out. But another part says “fuck him he pushed you away” tapping on the bow empty cereal bowl I hear the chunks of shoes hitting the floor.

“Aye mami, you okay?” Lunay rubs my shoulders, moaning at the tension in my body I nod my head slightly “are you sure? I’m here for you if you need a shoulder to cry on”

“Hm no I’m tired of crying, I’m moving on now”

“Aye nena! That’s right, you can do better” he encourages me. Lunay was throwing a party at his house tonight for a celebration on winning an award. I joined in even though Lunay told me I didn’t have to I just couldn’t be soaking in my sadness. It’s not going to fix anything so what’s the point of moping? Grabbing the drink on the counter I gulp it in one shot feeling it burn down my throat rapidly. Every cnco member was here but Joel. Made me wonder is he trying to avoid me? Why should he? He cheated on me he shouldn’t have any shame he knew what he got himself into. He shouldn’t have any shame it’s what he wanted anyways.

Drinking down another shot Richard furrows his eyes at me smiling I wave at him “what’s up Richard? You scared to drink?” I ask him

“Scared of you drinking, I don’t think you’re in the right headspace to be drinking nena” his lips fall in a flat line leaning against the counter, grabbing the bottle of liquor I grab my red solo cup this time.

“I think I’m just fine, I can’t sit around here and fucking waste my time in being sad, it’s been a whole month Richard, im fine” I crack open the cranberry juice to fuse with the liquor. “So stop worrying about me okay?”

“I’m worried about the both of y’all, hoping neither of you collapse first” Richard mumbles while walking away, I wanna ask him what that was about but I’m stopped by Lunay. With the biggest smile on his face.

“Hey? You good having fun?”

“Never better! Let’s dance” grabbing his hand with my left I sip with my right, everyone was bumping and grinding on their designated partner. Everyone here was having a great time. No one had a mask on themselves. Drinking, smoking falling in love in his backyard. Five cups down and the world was spinning. Taking off shoes and dancing on tables. I was dancing it away.

The pain away. Fuck it still hurt.

But there’s always three sides to a story.

His. Mine. And the side neither of us talked about.

Giggling on the couch I lay my head on christopers shoulder “hey cousin how are you?” I slur followed by a hiccup “I haven’t seen you since the hospital what are you up to these days?” My face felt hot and was probably showing hues of red. Maybe even pink.

“Babysitting two broken people is what” Christopher groans, he was rarely serious so this caught me off guard. Being to drunk to even ask I hug him.

“Aye, there’s no use in worrying, you gotta have a hurricane before the rainbow, I’ll be okay I promise”

“I hope so, we don’t want any more collateral damage” he hums in my ear.

The party was over and I watched as the few people that stayed over, Lunay was cleaning up trash until he saw me laying in the couch. “Mami, go to bed, or would you like me to drive you home?”

“Id rather not be alone” I mumble, almost throaty, suppressing the cries I want to let out. I can’t I’m done crying. I’ve been doing it for a whole month.

“Hey” he bends down to my level, running the pads of his thumb on my cheek “you’re never alone I promise” his eyes twinkled in love, I’m feeling the same way I did towards Joel. How can this be true? Have I moved on that quick?

Richard went back to Joel’s apartment, just as he was about to knock on the door, emailia opens it, her face showing signs of panic. “Wheres joel?” She asks

“And you think I would tell you? Plus that’s why I’m here to see was he here” Richard smugly answers

“So wait, hes not with you?” emailia asks

“Nope” Richard grabs his phone dialing his number, but to his demise it goes straight to the voicemail. Richard mumbling a soft curse word under his breath. “His phone is off”

“Oh my god fuck” she paces while chewing on her thumb, Richard looks at her with no sympathy but he just knew his mind had to ask.

“So what lie did you tell him hm?” emailia turns around on her heels looking back at him dumbfounded

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me I didn’t stutter, Joel is completely and utterly in love with bre, what did you say?!” Richard snaps are her, feeling Christopher pull him back slightly, “rich calm down”

“I didn’t tell him anything! He told me he felt bre was fading from him, and the more he tried the more she pulled, all I said was maybe she found someone else”

“Then took his sadness as your advantage to comfort him” Richard spits, walking away slowly

“You know damn well I love him!”

“If you did he wouldn’t be in this situation” Richard mumbles before getting in the car. “So? How are we going to find Joel?”

“We can’t, he’s been so secretive lately. Who knows where he is, the only thing I can think of is just wait for band practice or for him to come home” Richard sighs heavily “this is a fucking hurricane”

The bright sun beams on my eyelashes, squirming I feel a arm wrapped around my waist and the feeling of a chin in my shoulder. Slowly lifting the covers I gaze upon our naked bodies entwined together. Sighing and softly cursing to myself I sink my head deeper in the pillow.

Lunay and I hooked up.

Drunk hookup.

Slowly getting up from the bed I grab my clothes putting them on one by one. Until a hear a husky groan “good morning” he mumbles, my luck. Smiling I make it back to the bed sitting in front of him.

“Good morning” I whisper back

“How you feeling?” He asks

Embrassed.regretful.sad.

“Good, I had a good sleep”

“I imagine so” he jokes, getting up from the bed slowly “look bre, I don’t wanna be your rebound, I know this is the worst timing but, I’ve had a crush on you for the longest, and seeing how broken you are hurts me” freezing at his sudden words I looking down at the my tangled up fingers, “I want you to find what you mean to yourself, I want you to fix yourself, even if that means talking to him again”

“Lunay, I can’t even look him in the eyes and not want to cry”

“So? Isn’t better than wondering and drinking alcohol, not to mention losing your mind not knowing what to do” Lunay grabs my hand kissing my knuckles softly “bre, you deserve love okay? Don’t think that there won’t be someone out there for you”

Nodding my head I decided to face him head on. To talk about the problems I’ve never discussed.

Arriving at Joel’s apartment my stomach drops in depths. Never thought I’d come back here. Having ptsd just by looking at the snowflake walls, the way his plants on his patio are slowly decaying. He really isn’t doing to well just like me. Why is this so hard on him? I’m the one that should be triggered.

Knocking on the door I wait for his answer, the door swings open, smelling like a strand of weed. “Richard I told you-” his sentence is cut off by the sight of my eyes glued in his. “What are you doing here?”

“To talk” I answer

“What is there to talk about, I made you look stupid” Joel sighs

“yeah you’re fucking right you made me look like a fool, but I can’t blame you, maybe I pushed you towards that resort, not saying what you did was okay, but maybe the way I treated you inflicted this” I sigh leaning against the wall “can I come in?”

Joel opens the door for me to come in, closing the door behind me I see the mess his living room is in, I see the empty beer bottles and burned out half blunts. The edibles wrappers over the floor. Looking back at joel I see his hand is wrapped in a gauze. What has he been going through? I grab a bag as I start picking up his trash, “no it’s okay I’ll clean it up” Joel suggests but I grab his hand leading him to the couch.

“Let me help you, let someone help you okay? We gotta stop shoving people out” I stammer through my tears. Finish with cleaning up the mess, Joel and I sit on opposite sides of the couch.

“I’ve had two boyfriends in my lifetime, and when it got past two years, shit just started going downhill, one was abusive and one was a pathological liar and a drug addict” I start off, Joel’s eye filling to the brim with water, with just one touch they would pour down his lips. “It’s tiring opening and closing parts of me just to repeat the cycle, and when you cheated on me, I just saw you as the rest, I yelled at you and blamed you, I claimed you ruined everything, I wanted to fight you guys both, knowing she’d probably sue me or charged me with battery”

“In that heat of the moment I was willing to catch a case for it, cause you know me, when I get mad I get big mad, weeks after my accident I was going to call you, maybe even text you but I couldn’t, when I typed on the bubble I Tried my hardest not to disrespect you After what you did, man, what you expected?” My eyes looking at the tearful golden boy, his cheeks and nose were pink, so was his ears, glistening cheeks swelling up at the minute.

“I felt so Triggered, when I hear your name but also I was Triggered, because I am not okay, I was getting drunk partying hooking up with people all because I still missed you, Of our memories All you meant to meAll that history All that's history” my fingers trembling to grab his hand, caressing my thumb over his.

“But ain't no me and you without you in it, so I just wanna say I’m sorry, I pushed you away and made you feel like I didn’t love you, because I now know I do, I really do love you joel” the tears now falling out of his eyes, mirroring mine in the same gesture.

“I’m sorry too, I should’ve never talked to her about our problems, I should’ve came to you, but it isn’t your fault, I was the one who decided to have sex with her in our bed, no matter what I should’ve came and talked to you” Gravelly his voice echos the room, pulling him towards me, I wrap my arms around his head, letting him sob into my hoodie. As I begin to cry along with him.

“We’re both you blame, all we needed was to communicate” my wobbly voice whispers on his ear. “I accept your apology Joel, just promise we won’t run away from each other” feeling his body stop shuttering his head pulls out hovering over me.

“Yeah, I won’t run unless you promise to not run, and let’s better ourselves” Joel sniffs

“I’m not going anywhere, maybe someday we’d could be something more than friends again, you have my heart joel. We just need to fix ourselves before becoming one, but I don’t mind taking it slow with you”

“No labels? Just chilling?”

“Yeah” I smile caressing his face “slow burns”

“Slow burns”

[hey-hey-chan]

Demon!Stray Kids

❀ Fantasy/supernatural

❀ Word Count: 1.8K

❤ For @strgaykids who gave me this idea. I know your bias is Felix, but this became a Chan fic because he was my bias :(( and im sorry it sucks i cant write anymore :(( also i didnt reread this so dont hate me :(( 

❀ a/n: So here’s something new ,, there’s no love interest i guess just pure brotherhood :^) Sorry this is so short ,,, im having a bad time of writers block :( 

Chan 

I felt my opponent push me down, my stomach and face hugging the ground a little too intimately. I grunted in pain.

“GET UP! GET UP!” I heard the older man yell. I groaned. I couldn’t stand with my legs feeling like they were jello and that my bleed was spilling all over the mat.

I felt another kick come in contact with my side. I held in a scream, but I still let out a groan of pain. 

“You wimp! You can’t even fight a girl!” I heard another student yell. I knew woman were strong, but I still felt a blow to my ego. Although, the girl didn’t seem to like his statement. 

“Whatever! You can’t even beat me, you asshole!” She screamed, ignoring me for a split second. 

I heard the familiar whistle blow, signaling the end of a fight.

“Song Hyemi wins!” The instructor yelled bitterly. I felt myself being pulled up and to the sidelines. “C’mon boy! You can’t keep losing when you’re in line for the throne!” I heard the other kids laugh at my misery and who their next king was. 

I was ashamed. 

All demon royalty had the strongest of powers ranging from fire, manipulation, and mind reading. Yet, I had nothing. Not even an once of any ability. 

All demons had some powers, yet they weren’t as strong as the royals. Except they were all stronger than me. 

“Good fight, Chan. See you next time.” The girl I was fighting nudged me and gave me an evil smile. She walked over and high fived all the other students in our class. I wanted to be mad at her, but I knew she was an amazing fighter.

“Aw, Chan hyung, it’s ok, your powers will come in one day.” I felt a hand on my shoulder, making me slightly more at ease. I look behind my shoulder and sighed at the red head I call brother.

“Really? Because I’m almost 21 and no sign of any abilities have come in. Plus, I’m not like the usual demons. I have no urge to fight or to go hunting.” I set down my weapons and sit on a bench. 

Hunting. That’s what demons call finding evil demons, yes, there are ones more evil than us, and sucking their souls out. Just like any other species, we had jails, crimes, laws- we weren’t savages. 

“It’s ok bro, you’ll find your drive some time. Plus, so what? You’re a nice guy! That isn’t-” Before my brother could finish his sentence, I felt hands rest on my shoulders, spinning me around.

“Do you think this is a game?” He shouted immediately once all the other kids were in the lockers. “Huh? You think it is? You think dying on the battlefield when millions of people are counting on you? You think that’s just one big joke?” He screamed at me. I stood still and let him project his anger on me, but my brother was a different story.

“Hey, he’s trying, my brother is a good guy, ok?” I held Felix back before he could say any more.

“You’re right, I’m being stupid. I need to train harder...but it’ll be useless without my powers. I’m a strategist, not a fighter.” I confessed. The instructors eyes turned an ashy gray, contrary to his dark charcoal eyes. 

“You better learn how to fight soon or else your younger brother will have to step up instead. Chew on that, boy.” The man stomped out of the room like a child, leaving me and Felix to stand in the empty room. 

I felt a pat on my shoulder even before I could even think.

“Don’t listen to them, bro. You’re a smart guy and maybe our kingdom needs some more smarts than big burly guys.” He joked. I laughed at his childish humor. 

When I was growing up, I always felt that I was different. The other kids cast fires, ice, wind, all of these scary elements, and yet I had nothing. I would always stand and watch in awe while my parents stood off to the side sighing. 

I was pacifist. I hated fighting and everything about it. I hated war; I hated violence. And I had raised my brother that way, leaving him to be one of the most powerful demons in the world with no drive to fight. I could only regret what I taught him. 

I patted him on the shoulder and pulled him to the dining area. 

“Forget about it, let’s just dinner.” I muttered giving him a cheeky smile. 

“That’s true, we have better things to focus on, like how hot the girl who was beating you up was-” I immediately slapped him on the shoulder and laughed.

“FELIX! Please tell me that’s not what you were focusing on the entire time.” I blushed. The boy shook his head.

“Nope! I was focusing on how she was beating your ass to the ground every-” I, being the normal big brother I was, gave him a noogie and made him apologize. Although my brother could just blast him with his flames, he decided not to. Which made me even softer for the kid.

“Ok, ok, I give up!” He got out of my grasp and ran a few steps ahead into the dining hall. 

Immediately as we walked in, the glares and stares were on us. I walked confidently forward towards our food, ignoring the blatent hatred in their eyes.

In the demon world, the best were the cruelest, the most cunning, the strongest: I was none of those. 

“LOSER! You can’t even get one hit in!” I heard one kid yell at me.

“You two are a disgrace to the kingdom!” A girl shouted. 

“Just hand down the throne already-” I heard gasps erupt, knowing that comment was too far, but I just kept walking.

“People are so weird these days, they have nothing better to do but hate on us.” I joked to my brother. He scoffed and laughed at my statement.

“That’s true, let me show them at least one brother has powers.” Before I could stop him, a burst of fire shot through the cafeteria, each span of flames stopping in front of each student’s face. 

Their faces turned from laughter to horror, and I wanted to laugh, but I knew it was wrong. 

“Felix.” I warned. He gave me a pouty look and sent away the flames. No one messed with us after that. 

Suddenly, the doors of the cafeteria busted open, shocking each of the students.

“CHAN AND FELIX! Report to the west wing, now!” 

Felix and I had no time to look at each other and rather ran up from out seats. Unfortuanetly, we had a ratehr large crowd follow us. 

“HURRY!” 

At those words, we ran to the wing, looking for any sign of danger along the way.

“Chan-”

“It’s ok!” I calmed, even though I had no clue what the situation was.

As we reached the west wing, I saw it.

Two deranged demons.

Their teeth were rotten, probably from the others they had eaten. Their hair was falling out and sticking out in every which direction. Their eyes where pure black, not whites to be seen. 

Deranged demons were demons who had diseases and often turned crazy to be honest. Their minds were consumed by the natural evil in us and left them to feed on other demons- which was obviously illegal.

Unfortunately, only royal blood were able to destroy deranged demons in the demon world. That’s just perfect. 

Mostly, these demons roam in the mortal world, looking for souls to compel, but of course, my luck is terrible and two very strong ones happened to be standing in front of me.

I felt my brother take a step forward. I instinctively grabbed him and pulled him back.

“No, it’s too dangerous.” I mumbled. He looked at me with a worried gaze in his eyes.

“Dude, well how are you planning on stopping them?” 

He was right. We were the only royal bloods here besides my parents, and I had no idea when they would come. 

“Ok, well then, let’s umm..” I trailed off, unable to think of a plan.

“COME ON! JUST KILL THE THING!”

“Yeah! Let Felix kill them!” 

“YEAH! KILL THEM!” I heard numerous chants and frightened screams behind us, but they weren’t important. I knew if the demons got ahold of one of us, they would not stop. Draining a royal’s soul would lead the demon to be faster, stronger, smarter-something we obviously didn’t want them to be.

“Well bitch, what are you supposed to do?” 

“I DON’T KNOW!” I whispered at the poor boy who was clearly wanting to fight off the deranged. 

Think Chan think. 

I searched my brain for any ideas, but all of them told me to just let Felix fight hem off. I felt useless in this battle. 

“Fine, you can-” 

Suddenly, the deranged started screaming and running towards us. My eyes widened, preparing for the worst, but the worst never came.

I saw flames fly over our heads and right into the bodies of the deranged. Whines and whimpers flooded the west wing and both of them collapsed, fading into the familiar ashes. 

“What are you all doing standing here?? GO EAT YOUR DINNERS!” Felix and I turned our heads around at the same time and stared at the man. The crowd quickly dispersed at my father’s wishes, leaving me and my brother to gulp in fear. 

Waiting for a scolding, Felix and I held our breath. The king took one step towards us and sighed.

“Just get some rest boys, and next time don’t hesitate to kill them. They can easily hurt you and your classmates.” Our father turned around and returned to whatever he was doing.

Once he disappeared from sight, I let out a big sigh. 

“That was rough.”

I sat in the dorms with my brother as we both shared a room.

“Chan?” I set down the book I was reading and looked at my brother.

“Hm?”

“What happens if we can’t defeat those demons next time? What will happen to us?” He asked sadly. I sighed and pushed the book to my side. Chemistry could wait.

“We die.” I deadpanned. The young boy sucked in a breath.

“B-but, we need to kill them next time. I just, I don’t know, I don’t like knowing I killed someone.” He admit. I gave him a sad look and patted him on the shoulder.

“Don’t feel bad about having a heart, Felix. That’s something many demons don’t have.” I poked him on his chest, hoping that’s where his heart was. “Compassion is your biggest strength and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.” 

He said nothing at my words and I wondered if I said anything wrong.

Suddenly, I felt his lanky arms wrap around my body. 

“You too, Chan. You’re the nicest guy I know.” His words warmed my heart. I chuckled and patted his arms. 

“Yeah, yeah, at least you’re strong though.” I noted. He unwrapped his arms from me and demonstrated his small flames. I gazed in awe at his abilities- they always shocked me. 

Until he set my lamp on fire.

“God dammit Felix, not again!” 

[thathumanwiththecatears]

all of the ask! (for the numbers thing

well i hate you but also thanks cause i was bored

1: 6 of the songs you listen to most? 

Raggamufin~ Silversun Pickups

transatlantacism~ death cab

i will possess your heart~ death cab

Daydreaming~ radiohead

Canvas of life~ Epica

Who’d Have Known~ Lily Allen

2: If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?~ i really have no idea, so i will be gross and say whoever my soulmate is3: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.~ there are only 16 lines,,,, the last one is “Question: What is wrong with this picture?” its my science of music book,,,4: What do you think about most?~ probably my stomach pain, or how much I lov my frens5: What does your latest text message from someone else say?~”!!!!!!”6: Do you sleep with or without clothes on?~ usually, sometimes no shirt, i hate shirts7: What’s your strangest talent?~ I can hit my wrist with the attached hand, i broke it like 3 times8: Girls… are beautiful and im gay; Boys… are beautiful and im gay9: Ever had a poem or song written about you?~ yes10: When is the last time you played the air guitar?~ probs a few years, its tragic11: Do you have any strange phobias?~ not really strange but i am deathly afraid of bugs, if i even see one it will feel like its on me for like hours cause i get so freaked out12: Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?~ probably13: What’s your religion?~ idk14: If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?~ swim15: Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?~in front if im also taking the pic, if not behind16: Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?~ im not answering this i dont have one17: What was the last lie you told?~ “yes thats all she said about you”18: Do you believe in karma?~ yes19: What does your URL mean?~ im a human (probably) and i wore cat ears for a year20: What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?~ weakness: people, i always say yes to anything, strength: not showing emotion21: Who is your celebrity crush?~ none im demi22: Have you ever gone skinny dipping?~ no23: How do you vent your anger?~ rant on here24: Do you have a collection of anything?~ hello kitty stuff25: Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?~ talking on the phone, dont look at me26: Are you happy with the person you’ve become?~ eeh27: What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?~ VELCRO I HATE IT; rain28: What’s your biggest “what if”?~ what if no one loves me (ew thats too deep)29: Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?~ sure why not30: Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.~ right: wall; left: plastic bag31: Smell the air. What do you smell?~ my shampoo that smells like old ladies in a good way32: What’s the worst place you have ever been to?~ earth33: Choose: East Coast or West Coast?~ east mate34: Most attractive singer of your opposite gender?~ there is no opposite gender35: To you, what is the meaning of life?~ happiness36: Define Art.~” hey look i made this” yes this includes children37: Do you believe in luck?~ ya38: What’s the weather like right now?~ fine, warm39: What time is it?~ 9:2840: Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?~ no41: What was the last book you read?~ i dont read42: Do you like the smell of gasoline?~ no43: Do you have any nicknames?~ iz44: What was the last film you saw?~ Beauty and the Beast45: What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?~ broken arm46: Have you ever caught a butterfly?~ ya47: Do you have any obsessions right now?~ ya48: What’s your sexual orientation?~ demi49: Ever had a rumour spread about you?~ ya50: Do you believe in magic?~ ya51: Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?~ sometimes, depends on if i like the person52: What is your astrological sign?~ aquarius53: Do you save money or spend it?~ save54: What’s the last thing you purchased?~ sunglasses55: Love or lust?~ love56: In a relationship?~ i wish57: How many relationships have you had?~ somewhere between 1 and 3 i honestly couldnt tell ya58: Can you touch your nose with your tongue?~ i did once, 59: Where were you yesterday?~ home, walmart, 60: Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?~ lots, including on my pants and laptop61: Are you wearing socks right now?~ no62: What’s your favourite animal?~ i cant pick, cats,sharks,polar bears, penguins63: What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?~ try way too hard64: Where is your best friend?~ home probably idk65: Give me your top 5 favourite blogs on Tumblr. @the-merry-maiden​ @yukinessecretadmirer​ @thatoneirishgirl​ @anxiety-cucumber​ @brookballad​66: What is your heritage?~ idk im white67: What were you doing last night at 12AM?~ watching BBCAN with @yukinessecretadmirer​68: What do you think is Satan’s last name?~ what69: Biggest turn ons?~ necc, idk what else really70: Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?~ ye71: You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?~ save the doggo72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?~ I would tell some people, would probably tell the people i love that i love them, no73: You can only have one of these things; trust or love.~ trust74: What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?~ a song immediately popped into my head but sometimes it makes me sad, so fireflies- Owlcity 75: What are the last four digits in your cell phone number?~719476: In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?~ trust77: How can I win your heart?~ say hi, thats it78: Can insanity bring on more creativity?~ sure79: What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?~ dying my hair white80: What size shoes do you wear?~ 11-12 (in womens) i actually usually wear a pair that are 11 in mens 14 in womens my imaginary dick is huge81: What would you want to be written on your tombstone?~ see you soon82: What is your favourite word?~ sleep83: Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart.~ love84: What is a saying you say a lot?~ not a saying but I say “YAH DINGUS” a lot85: What’s the last song you listened to?~ Love is Love by Mary Lambert is on rn86: Basic question; what’s your favourite colour/colours?~ apparently lime green87: What is your current desktop picture?~ a nebula thing i made88: If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?~ probs orange man89: What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on?~ “who do you love”90: Turn offs?~ being a dick91: You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?~ shape shifting, i could be a perfect version of me92: where are your parents from?~ america93: You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?~ life94: You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?~ none95: You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?~ alaska or antarctica96: Do you have any relatives in jail?~ not that im aware of97: Have you ever thrown up in the car?~ ye98: Ever been on a plane?~ no99: If the whole world were listening to you right now, what would you say~ stop being fucking idiots