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landosjpg · 8 months ago

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chicken shop date | ln

the one where your boyfriend gets invited to the chicken shop date and you’re not really happy about it.

lando norris x gender-neutral!reader

word count: ~1.1k

warnings: just reader being a tiny bit jealous and insecure & fluff at the end

note: based on this request. took me a little longer than it should had but i wanted to watch the interview before to know how to approach it, but hope you enjoy it!

"i'm just not really fond of the idea!" you huffed, sinking further into your boyfriend's couch, dramatically crossing your arms under your chest with pouty lips.

your reaction got a laugh out of lando and he let his body plop down next to you, looking over at your saddened expression with a soft smile on his lips.

"baby, come on. i'm gonna be late," he cooed, his fingers trying to reach for your chin to get you to look at him so he could give you a kiss goodbye, but you easily managed to turn your face in the opposite direction before his lips could touch yours.

this gesture got a sigh out of lando, making him drop his hand to your lap in defeat.

"it's gonna be alright," he said, his voice still sweet as he tried te reassure you, knowing that under your over dramatic reaction lied the anxiety of him getting even more popular.

just the previous evening, his team had informed him that he was scheduled for a new interview in the morning. when he finished telling you all about it after hanging up the phone, your eyebrows were furrowed and the pout you made hadn't left your face since that very moment.

the chicken shop date.

you usually watched the show, so you knew how big of an audience it had. it wasn't the fake dating part that worried you, but the huge amount of fans it would get him.

it was a little stupid, you knew, considering that he was one of the most popular faces of the sport. but you couldn't help the little insecurities that surfaced from time to time, thinking that he could find someone to replace you at any given minute.

lando's hand squeezed yours softly, making you get out of your mind and look back at him. he knew what you were thinking, so he gave you a reassuring smile before bringing your hand up to his lips and pressed a gentle kiss to your knuckles. so you gave in.

"just don't be funny. or nice," you said, trying your best to forget about your worries and trust that nothing would change. "don't be cute, either."

"i can do that," lando chuckled, and with your hand still in his, he leaned closer to you to finally peck your lips.

"good, cause i don't want to share my boyfriend with any more people," you added, making him smile as he pulled away and got up from his spot next to you.

he found your overprotectiveness rather cute sometimes, and every single time he tried to comfort you, reminding you that you were the only one he wanted.

with your little act over, you looked up at his figure in front of you as he gathered his things before leaving the house. he looked extra good; you had noticed how the color of his hoodie was bringing out the blue of his eyes a few minutes earlier and how his curls were still a little damp from his shower, one of them perfectly falling over his forehead.

he turned to look at you one last time, leaning to kiss your forehead and whisper an "i love you" before he left the apartment in a rush, your little tantrum surely making him arrive a good couple of minutes late.

୨୧

lando had asked you to join him in australia so you could spend a few days exploring the city before he had to go back to work. and naturally, you had accepted.

as any other day, you woke up in his arms, limbs tangled under the bedsheets and your cheek softly pressed against his bare chest.

you lazily turned around, trying not to wake him up, to reach for your phone to check the time. that was your intention, but as you saw your phone blowing up with notifications, you remembered.

the episode had come out only a few hours earlier.

not wanting to spoil yourself scrolling on social media, you quickly opened youtube and looked it up, feeling a little uneasy once again. you weren't sure what you could expect, lando hadn't said much about it when he returned home that day.

you couldn't help the smile that creeped up to your lips the second he appeared on your screen, his soft spoken voice warming your heart and making you snuggle closer to him, your back against his chest now.

you felt the grip around your waist getting a little tighter, his knees tucking behind yours.

"are you serious?" his voice was hoarse, his breath on your skin as he hid his face on your neck.

"you didn't think i wouldn't watch, did you?" you giggled when he pulled you closer to him, only getting a soft groan from his lips as an answer.

he didn't say anything else, just kept pressing soft kissis to your skin as you finished watching the interview, your smile growing wider at his shyness.

once you were done, you put your phone down and turned around to face him again. your eyes met his under the soft morning light, the corners of your lips moving upwards at the beautiful sight in front of you.

"it wasn't that bad now, was it?" he whispered, clearly referring to your tantrum the day of the filming.

"it was fun," you admitted, running your fingers through his curls slowly.

he hummed, letting his eyelids flutter close once again at your touch.

"i'm still not happy about sharing my boyfriend with new people," you playfully added after a few seconds, the little pout on your lips, but lando was quick to kiss it away. "and i could've asked you those questions myself," you sassed, making him roll his eyes with a chuckle at your words.

"maybe you should go on a date with me if you want to ask me those questions so bad," he said, trying to nuzzle his face on your neck again to hide his smirk.

"smooth," you giggled, wrapping one of your legs around his body and pulling him a little closer to yours. "i'd love to go on a date with you, baby."

he smiled at your murmured answer, kissing your jaw before mumbling himself, "tomorrow night then?"

with a slight nod of your head, you hummed and let your eyes shut close to enjoy a couple more minutes in bed with your boyfriend before the alarm went off.

#lando norris #lando norris fluff #lando norris smut #lando norris blurb #lando norris drabble #lando norris fanfic #lando norris imagine #lando norris x reader #lando norris x you #f1 x reader #f1 fanfic #ln4 #ln4 x reader #ln4 imagine #ln4 fic

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flemingsfreckles · 3 months ago

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First Snow

Synopsis: based on this request!

Warning: none, mention of showering together (non-sexual nudity) but nothing descriptive

WC: 2.1k

A/N: hi, I had some personal stuff happen which pretty much ruined my motivation for writing, I wasn’t even sure I’d ever be posting on this account again… but here we are.

“Okay do you have a coat packed?”

“Yeah it’s right here.” You pull out the two hoodies, one of Jessie’s that you had stolen and one of your own.

Jessie just stares at you. “Babe.”

“What?” You shrug as you shove the sweatshirts back into your suitcase.

“I mean a real coat. A winter coat.” She grabs a large puffy coat out of her own bag and holds it up to you.

“That is what I wear in the winter.” You point at the blue and green hoodies that still suck out of your bag.

“Yeah, in Australia, Canada isn’t Australia.” Jessie throws her hands out, looking in confusion at you.

“It’ll be fine!” You brush her off with a wave of your hand.

“No, you’ll be cold.”

“It can’t be that cold.” Jessie just shakes her head at you, a smile creeping across her face. She’d just let you figure out how cold it was on your own.

Turns out, it was that cold. You felt it in your lungs as soon as you stepped off the plane. Jessie took a deep breath as if she was enjoying the sharp sting of the air in her lungs. She must have noticed the way your breath got caught in your throat.

“Cold eh?”

“I mean it’s fine.” You couldn’t let her have the satisfaction of being right already.

“Good because this isn’t even cold yet.” Your eyes widened at her words.

When you arrived at Jessie’s childhood home she gave you a quick tour before she stopped at a window looking out into the backyard. “See the lake?” She says peering over your shoulder and pointing out.

“Yes.”

“It’s frozen.”

“No shit.” You say, grin on your face. You could see the water wasn’t moving, you could tell it had frozen over.

“That’s how cold it gets.” Jessie whispers in your ear. You roll your eyes at her. She turns, giving you a quick smile before walking away and down the stairs to find her parents.

You spent the evening in the living room with Jessie’s parents. You’d met them a few times, at the World Cup, again at the Olympics, a few times when they had visited Jessie when she lived in London, but this was your first time in Canada and your first time meeting them in their own home.

Jessie’s family was warm and welcoming just as they had been every time you had met them prior. The four of you sat around the table having dinner before quickly moving to play cards where Jessie was teased about being overly competitive, a trait of hers you knew all too well.

“Did you see it’s supposed to snow tonight?” Jessie’s mom asks, directing her question to no one specifically.

“Really?” Your girlfriend pipes up, looking excitedly between you and her mom. “She’s never seen a real snow.” Jessie sticks her finger in your direction.

“I have.” You quickly defend yourself. You had always lived by the beach, and while it cooled down in the winter, never enough for a snow storm. London commonly rained, you’d only gotten a light snowing last year.

You had rolled over in the middle of the night to see the streetlights illuminating the tiny dots falling. You had immediately sat up, poking your knee into the thigh of your girlfriend. “Jess.” She shifted but didn’t open her eyes so you tried again. “Jessie, wake up.” You shoved her a bit harder, leaning down to kiss her forehead, hopefully easing the mood you knew she’d be in for you waking her up. “Babe.”

“What?” Jessie’s voice heavy with sleep mumbled out at you. She kept her eyes closed but tilted her head in the direction of your voice.

“It’s snowing, I’ve never seen snow.” At the sound of your words, you’re met with Jessie’s brown eyes. A small smile breaks onto her face as she watches you look excitedly between her and the window. That smile immediately fades when she herself turns to see what would be considered no snow by Canadian standards.

“Look!” You point, sitting up to watch out the window, still excited seeing the flakes fall for the first time.

“Oh babe.” Jessie gently rubs your back as she softly shakes her head. “That’s hardly a snow, it won’t even be on the ground by morning.”

“Oh.” You feel the smile fade on your face, you hadn’t known, in your mind you had expected to walk out to white covered streets in the morning.

“Come here.” Jessie grabbed your arm gently pulling you down into her embrace. She adjusted before gently kissing your forehead just as you had done to wake her up. “I promise, I’ll take you to see real snow some day.”

“The eighth of an inch we got in London doesn’t count, I’ve told you that.” Jessie jokingly rolled her eyes at you. “You’ll get to hopefully see real snow while we’re here.”

It wasn’t long until you and Jessie had called it a night, feeling tired from the long travel day, you both cuddled into Jessie’s bed, under piles of blankets and drifted into sleep.

“Get up.” You feel Jessie’s sharp elbow poking into your side, you roll over and try to register why she’d be waking you up in the middle of the night.

“What?”

“Get up, get dressed, we’re doing something.” She whispers to you before clicking on the bedside lamp.

You flip over again, staring at the freckled face before you. “You’re joking right?” The alarm clock sitting behind Jessie’s curls tells you it’s 2:47 in the morning, you can’t fathom why she’d be waking you up at this hour.

“No, get up.” She yanks the blanket off of your body making you squeal at the sudden chill. “Dress warmly.” She says as she walks over to where her suitcase was sprawled on the ground and begins getting changed. You watch as she strips from her sleeping shirt and shorts. “Quit staring.” Jessie teased when she turns and catches you watching her change. You felt your face flush and you broke your eyes away from her freckle covered skin to move to your own suitcase. Jessie tosses an actual winter coat in your direction, insisting you put it on. You quickly get dressed and follow Jessie out of her room and down the stairs.

“Come here.” Jessie turns you facing toward her before she holds up a blindfold. “Can I put this on you? I want to show you a surprise.”

“Yeah.” You say as she gently slides the blindfold over your eyes.

“You can’t see right?”

“Nope.”

“Okay, we’re gonna walk, I’ve got you though.” Jessie stands by your side, her arm wrapping tightly around your waist. You feel her start to gently pull you and you follow her step by step slowly through the house. You hear the sound of a lock and a door opening and you’re suddenly hit in what little exposed skin you have by a rush of freezing air.

“Okay, step carefully out.” You follow her instructions and hear the door close behind you. Jessie’s fingers find the edges of the blindfold and she gently pulls it up, revealing a sight like no other to you.

The backyard was covered in a thick layer of snow, real snow. The same real snow that continued to fall from the sky. The same snow that you felt melting as it hit your already rosy cheeks. You turned to Jessie, the flakes catching in her hair, her cheeks equally rosy and her smile as big as can be.

You pull your eyes away from admiring Jessie’s face and you start to look around. You were standing in what was probably 6 inches of snow, admiring the way the trees were glistening in the moonlight, the way everything seemed peaceful. It was like you were living inside of a snow globe.

“Wow.” The only word you’re able to come up with as you continue to look around with wide eyes, feeling a sense of childlike excitement in your stomach, the same feeling you’d get trying to go to sleep the night before your birthday, or the sense of adventure you had when you’d get on a plane and feel it lift from the ground. Everything around you was blanketed in the fluff.

You’re pulled out of your admiration for the view by the feeling of something hitting your side before it disintegrates. You turn to Jessie, looking guilty with another ball of snow in her hand.

“Don’t you dare.” You hold a hand out at her and before you can get another word out, she flings the ball at you hitting you square in the chest, some of it coming up to hit your face as it explodes. “You’re gonna pay for that Fleming.” You say before you lunge at her.

Jessie manages to slip from your grip and she takes off running around the yard. You suddenly learn it’s a lot harder to run through snow than it looks. You stumble every couple of steps while Jessie snickers to herself as she watches you chase after her. You manage to hit her with your own amateur snowballs a few times, catching her legs and her back before she turns on you and it’s now you running from her.

Your lack of experience in snowboots and the snow catch up to you and within a minute Jessie’s arms have wrapped around your midsection and you both trip ending up in a tangled pile on the ground. You’re both laughing as you recover from the chaos, feeling yourself sink into the white layer around you. You shiver at the contrast in feeling the cold snow on your back, neck, and down your legs while Jessie’s body heat keeps your front warm.

“I told you it’s cold.” Jessie says, pushing herself up slightly to look at you, a smug look across her face.

“Ehh it’s not too bad.” You try to play it off, it was a lot colder than you expected.

The girl above you leans in, placing her lips on yours and you revel in the warmth of her kiss. “You’re lucky I lent you a jacket.” She says as she rolls off to lay beside you. She doesn’t say anything before starting to swing her legs outward before repeating a similar action with her arms swinging them down to her sides then back up again.

You look over, admiring the love of your life. The way her curls peaked out from under the hat she wore. You started at how the snowflakes caught in her hair, making it sparkle. You admired her rosy cheeks, both from chasing each other around and from the cold air. What you admired the most was the way she was smiling. Her eyes would flutter open, looking up at the snow falling for a moment before closing again, all while she had a huge grin across her face. You loved seeing her this happy, this carefree, this was your Jessie.

“You’ve got a staring problem today.” She teases you again just as she had while she was changing. “Copy what I’m doing.” You don’t ask why, you never had to with Jessie, she said jump you did have to ask how high, you just would, you trusted her, whatever she asked, you’d do your best. So you do, you mimic her movements swinging your own legs and arms.

Jessie stands up, offering out her hand to you, she helps you stand and turns back to face where you had been lying. “Snow angels.” She nods her head at the imprints your bodies had made. You go to answer but when you open your mouth your teeth chatter. Jessie laughs, looking over at you as you shiver.

“Alright, time to go in.” Still holding your hand she pulls you inside where you both take off the big puffy coats, still left in cold clothing. You leave your boots at the mat and follow Jessie back up the stairs and into her childhood bedroom. She moves into the bathroom that was joined between Jessie’s bedroom and what was formerly her sister's bedroom. You hear the shower start running.

“Come, we’ll warm up in the shower.” She says as she begins to strip off her own cold and wet layers. You follow in suit before climbing into the steaming water. The two of you shower together, warming back up slowly between the steaming water and Jessie’s presence, before dressing again in your clothes. You climb into bed, eager to get back into the warm layers of blankets while Jessie moves to her window, adjusting the curtains so that you could watch the snow falling. She then cuddles up behind you in bed, her arms wrapping around your waist, holding you tight against her front.

“I promised I’d show you a real snow.”

#jessie fleming #jflem #jessie fleming x reader #jessie fleming imagine #woso x reader #woso imagine #jessie fleming blurb #canwnt x reader

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outsideratheart · 1 year ago

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Fighting Talk (Alexia Putellas x reader)

A/N: based of this request.

England had beaten Australia and you knew what it meant.

Spain versus England in the World Cup Final.

On one hand you were incredibly proud to have reached the final but in your eyes you weren’t playing Spain, you were playing your best friends and the woman you loved most in this world, your wife. It is one of the first thoughts after the whistle had blown. It is a thought that you only allowed to run wild in you head for a few minutes because now was the time for celebrating not worrying about things that hadn’t happened yet.

“We did it skipper!” Lucy jumped on your back as you thank the fans for showing up.

“We sure did Luce”

The defender had been your best friend since the youth teams and to finally make to the final together was a something you once thought might never happen. The two of you talk about the past but soon get brought back to the present when a member of the team’s media team says you’re wanting for an interview with Fara Williams. Much to your surprise Lucy volunteers to do the interview with you. It made you suspicious but you put Lucy’s eagerness down to the fact that she wants to celebrate with Fara.

Within seconds of been handed a microphone you find out why Lucy wanted to do this with you.

“Look at that fan. She looks familiar, don’t you think?”

There stands Alexia doning a black cap in hopes of going unrecognised but you could pick her out in the crowd, it could be 50 people or 50 thousand people, you would always find her. The rest of the interview is a bit of a blur with you saying little to nothing instead choosing to focus of your wife who you hadn't seen since you left for England a week after the champions league final. You knew now more than ever that you had to remain focused but you wanted nothing more than to walk up into the stand, grab Alexia's hand and whisk her away to the closest hotel.

Before getting a quick shower you send Alexia a text message asking to see her and by the time you're done you have a response saying she is already outside the changing room.

"You did it. You're through to the final" Alexia congratulates you.

"So are you. I'm so proud of you Alexia, you have no idea"

Whilst your marriage was public knowledge, you still stood apart as people went about their way cleaning up the stadium.

You could feel the tension. The thickness that came from spending this much time apart. Alexia's eyes looked you up and down making her thoughts crystal clear, you thoughts were alligned but you knew there wasn't time to pursue the hunger you had for each other.

In small groups the England players leave the locker room, some of them giving the two of you privacy, others saying a quick hello and congratulations then there's Lucy and Keira who tease you mercilessly. They tell Alexia how you have been pining for her since the minute the plane left Spain and how you really needed to relieve stress, this was followed by a knowing look as if the meaning of their statement wasn't blatantly obvious.

"I wish we could have day, just one, just us before things get hectic" It saddens you to say because you know this is the closest you two will be.

"Come here" she pulls you into her arms "I'm going to see you in a couple of days and even though you will be wearing the England badge and I will be wearing spain's, we will still be us"

"The media is going to have field day with the press conference" you were already dreading it.

"Doesn't mean we can't have a little fun" you look up to see Alexia raising her eyebrows in a playful manner.

"Is that so?"

The spaniard hums in response before leaning in to kiss you. It was a feeling that you were desperate for and if the passion Alexia returned what anything to go by, she held the same desperation.

A couple of days later you entered Stadium Australia with two coffees in hand, one for you and one for Alexia. Truth is you were already running late by the time you left the hotel so why not pick up a treat for your wife.

You can hear Alexia’s voice from outside the conference room. Instead of walking in and interrupting her conversation with a journalist who is a friend of yours as she works closely with Barcelona, you stand at the door and listen.

“You finally decided to show up. Clearly I am a much more affective alarm clock” Alexia says as you spots you.

“It’s not the waking up that’s difficult, it’s the whole falling asleep without you that I find hard”

The room breaks out in a unanimous awe.

“That’s off the record of course” all of them agree “this is for you. Consider it an apology for my tardiness”

“Apology accepted” Alexia takes a sip of the freshly brewed Australian coffee “this is really good”

“Of course it is. The cafe is round the corner. If you have some time after I can take you”

“You hear that guys. Y/N Y/L/N is trying to charm her way into my head and distract me. She knows that I have training after this” the Catalonian jokes.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about Alexia Putellas” you send her a wink.

“Isn’t it Alexia and Y/N Putellas-Y/L/N?” One of the interviewers asks.

You and Alexia revealed that you had had gotten married by posting a photo on Instagram to celebrate your 1 year anniversary. It was a well kept secret and the world only found out when you were ready, much like how everyone found out about your relationship.

“Right now it’s Y/N Y/L/N vs Alexia Putellas. Captain vs captain. Balon d’Or winner vs Balon d’Or winner”

“As you can see the the game might be tomorrow but the competition has already begun” Alexia says earning a laugh.

“You both are joking around now but you have to know the seriousness of tomorrow’s game” you and Alexia share a look, you know the type of question that is coming “you are two of the best players in the world, have won the treble together with Barcelona this season. How do you prepare to go against one another on the biggest stage in football? How do you focus on leading your countries whilst simultaneously making sure it doesn’t affect your marriage? One of you will break the other ones heart tomorrow. ”

The room grows silent. So much so that you could hear a pin drop. The smile that has been on your face since walking in had vanished and Alexia’s head dropped, her focus now on her hands that sat on her lap.

The two of needed to gain control of the room again and Alexia didn’t want her time with you to be spent dreading what will be one of the best matches in your careers. You make the first move, you move you chair closer to Alexia’s and take her hand in yours under the table. It’s obvious to the journalists in front of you what you are doing but they don’t have any proof. You give it a quick squeeze, Alexia nods her head telling you that she will answer the question.

“We did win the treble so we know what it takes to be a champion, tomorrow will be no different. This isn’t the first time we have played against each and it won’t be last. It will be hard, I know we will make the other one work for it and it means that by the end of the match the best player will win”

“I want to do right by Alexia but I also owe it to my team to be the leader they need. I wear this ring every day but my focus is on this team” you tap the badge on your jacket “and being crowned world champions. England are my priority right now but when it’s all over I will go home to her, always”

You turn to see Alexia already looking at you with a soft expression. When a flash goes off you know that this photo will be the one shared around the world.

“Depending on how you play tomorrow you might be on the sofa” the woman beside you jokes.

“After over a month apart we both know we are going to be in bed together the night I get home and the morning after that” you whisper.

“Y/N!” Alexia scolds you as her cheeks grow red. Your wide eyes tells her you don’t think you did anything wrong “microphone”

“Shit” you look out to the journalist. Half of them are looking anywhere but at you and the rest have smirks on their faces. “That last part is—“

“Off the record” a few of them say in unison.

“Thank you”

“Muchas gracias”

The two of you answer a few more questions and keep it as light as possible. The media enjoy the way you go back and forth with each other. Alexia knows just what to say to get under your skin and you do your best to see how many times you can make her blush before the press conference is over.

“What am I going to do with you?” Alexia asks as you walk the halls of the stadium.

“Whatever you want baby” you look around and when you see the coast is clear you push Alexia against the wall and crash your lips together. You only had one thing on your mind since the insinuation of what is going to happen once the two of you are back in Spain.

“Not here” Alexia pulls away but instead of stopping you move your lips to her neck, to the sensitive spot that you know drives her wild.

She knew what was coming next and she knows she has to stop you. To do so she cups your face and moves your lips back to her own. It’s more than enough for you and when you hear Alexia’s muffled moans you know she is enjoying it just as much as you.

By the time you pull away you are both out of breathe with your lips slightly swollen.

“I’ll see you on the pitch Y/L/N”

“May the best woman win Putellas”

#Alexia Putellas x reader #alexia putellas one shot #alexia putellas imagine #woso x reader #woso one shot #woso imagine #barcelona femeni x reader #barcelona femeni imagine #Barcelona femeni one shot #espwnt x reader #espwnt one shot #espwnt imagine

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iinsertblognamee · 1 year ago

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surprise

summary ― you come over to australia to surprise sam

pairing ― sam kerr x reader

warning/s ― fluff, pregnancy

based off this request

The drive from the airport to the hotel was short enough, the passing buildings keeping your mind at ease, your hand resting on your small bump. You had been fortunate enough with the travel from Heathrow over to Melbourne. The flight was surprisingly easy, considering you were just hitting your fifth month of pregnancy.

You had arrived back in Australia just after nine pm, lucky enough to call your wife before she was set to go to bed, wishing her good luck for her game tomorrow. You had been as sneaky as you could be, paying the ridiculous added fee to have wifi on board the plane so you could still text Sam - not wanting to make her suspicious. It also helped that you could text everyone who had helped you get over here to make sure everything was okay on their end.

She currently believed you were at your shared home back in London, her Chelsea teammates, Millie and Guro babysitting you whilst she was away. Although the original plan had always been for you to come, once you had found out you were pregnant Sam suddenly got very protective. She researched everything on both the baby’s safety and yours and had learnt that flying could cause problems for both of you. If Sam was anything, stubborn was her biggest trait - and she had decided that it was too dangerous for you to be fighting back and forth with the baby.

You let her have this, deciding that she would eventually back down and be okay with you flying.

She didn’t back down, and you both had to say your goodbyes as she made her way over to Denmark in October. Although she was only gone for a couple of days, you hated it. You hated waking up to an empty bed, you missed the way she would rest her hand over your stomach, as she ran her fingers along it. You missed the way she’d give you a kiss on the lips, before bending down to kiss your stomach too. You just missed her, and although Sam would tease you about it constantly - you knew she missed you too.

The second she came home, you had decided that you couldn’t do this distance again and set up a doctor's appointment during one of her training sessions.

The appointment was simple enough, you asked every question under the sun about flying whilst pregnant, and the dangers that may arise if you were, Your doctor answered every single one - not a hint of judgement in her voice as she helped lessen your stress.

After hearing her give you the all-clear for international flying, you shot right home calling up Alanna to get her to help you book everything for the game. You were a little disheartened when you realised the flight Sam was on was completely booked, as well as every other flight that day and the next couple of days after.

You almost gave up, until Alanna found a flight that would arrive the night before their game against Sweden. You booked that same night, and Alanna sent an email to whoever was dealing with accommodation to let them know that you would be joining.

During the rush of looking for flights, you had decided that you would surprise Sam - you wanted to see her face as she realised you were there, cheering her on. Alanna agreed, and let them know that you would require a room to yourself for the first night you landed in Australia but after that - well, it was obvious you’d be rooming with Sam after that.

So, like planned Sam and you had said your goodbyes - Sam kissing you and your belly over and over again. You both gave sad smiles, as she waved goodbye and made her way onto the plane. You knew logically you would be seeing her in just a few days, but any distance was enough to make you upset.

The hotel came into sight soon enough, the Matilda’s team had sorted a private transfer for you - which you were forever grateful for, your body aching and in need of a warm shower and a comfy bed.

The lift takes you straight up to your level, your suitcase trailing behind you as you scan your key card and open the door. The lights blind you for a few seconds, blinking a few times for you to adjust to the new lighting. The door shuts behind you with a small click, the bed looking perfectly comfy as you flop backwards onto it. A sigh leaves your lips as you close your eyes once again.

Although your body clock was technically still on ‘London’ time, your pregnancy body clock was constantly tired, a small stretch of your limbs before you pulled yourself up once again. Although you were one quick blink away from falling asleep, you forced yourself into the shower - washing away the last twenty-four hours. You make your way back to bed, your head hitting the pillow and sleep comes instantly.

…

A knock interrupts you, your phone dropping from your hand and onto the bed, as you make your way to the door. Alanna and Caitlin standing on the other side, smiles on both their faces as you pull them into a group hug.

They follow you back into the room, the door closing as you sit down on the bed, Caitlin joining you as Alanna stays standing. They ask how you’ve been, and how the flight was as you ask them about training and this afternoon's game. Caitlin’s hand had joined yours on your stomach, the baby giving you both a small kick - Caitlin’s mouth dropping open.

“I felt that!” she practically screams, you laugh along as the baby kicks once again.

The three of you continue to talk for a few minutes, discussing your plans for this afternoon. Alanna and you agreed that it would be easier if took another private transfer to the stadium, figuring it’d save the hassle of waiting for an Uber but also keep you away from Sam (not wanting to ruin the surprise).

The mention of the striker gets both girls gloating on how mopey your wife had been the past of days. Always mentioning how much she missed you and the baby; you laugh along with them but feel a sense of pride fill your heart.

God, you loved that woman.

Soon enough the two Matidas say their goodbyes, you wishing them both luck and telling them to look after Sam for you. The door shuts behind them, and the room falls to a silence. Nerves of the game now erupting in your stomach. You had been so caught up in trying to keep the surprise from Sam that you hadn’t thought about how’d she react.

Would she be mad that you went against her word? You knew that the doctor had given you the all-clear, but Sam was still worried - and to be fair she had only asked you this one thing. You know how much Sam would stress about things, and her knowing you were home safe was probably one of the only factors in her life right now that she could count on. Except you were now here, thousands of kilometres away from where she had left you.

Your thoughts get interrupted by another knock on the door, this time the driver from last night ready to take you over to the game. You both chat about the game as you make your way downstairs towards the car. Katrina’s mum, Linda and Harper were downstairs waiting for you and you couldn’t help but smile as Harper let out a squeal once she saw you. Throwing her arms up for you to grab her.

You of course do, planting kisses all over her face, her gigglings filling the reception. The three of you then make your way into the car, The whole way to the stadium music that katrina had made just for Harper was playing, you and Linda getting involved with and singing with her. Her giggles brought smiles to everyone in the car.

The stadium was getting busy as you arrived, gold and green filling the areas as fans took to the stands. You thanked the driver, as the three of you hopped out - Harper wanting to go back in your arms but her grandmother telling her to just hold your hand to give you a break. As much as you love Harper, you sent her a thankful smile. Carrying your baby was straining enough.

The seats were great, the excitement of the crowd only growing your excitement too. The thought of seeing Sam again kept a smile on your face. You have taken the job of keeping Harper occupied before the game, her colouring book laying on the chair as the two of you colour it in. Linda braiding her hair whilst she was distracted.

“You excited for the baby?” she asked, you lift your head as you nod.

“Yeah, Sam and I have talked about having kids for years” you look back down at Harper, somehow your smile growing even bigger. “I mean I love kids, always wanted some of my own but didn’t know if that was possible you know?”

She nods her head, knowing exactly what you meant. Her own daughter had the exact same thoughts, decided to go through IVF without a partner and out came Harper.

“You’re going to be a great mother”

You blame the pregnancy hormones when the tears start welling up in your ears, she notices straight away, a small laugh leaving her lips as she pulls you into a hug and rubbing your back.

“Oh, honey. There’s nothing to cry about” You let her hold you a little longer, shaking your head as you laugh in agreement. You start to wipe the tears away as you both pull back.

“I know. I know. I just - Thank you. I means a lot, especially coming from such a great mother and grandmother”. The two of you continue to bond over baby related topics, and before you know it the cheering of the stadium starts intensifying.

You feel your emotions starting up again as you spot Sam coming onto the field, Harper jumping in her seat - both yours and her grandma’s hands holding onto her so she doesn’t fall - as she spots her mum.

The starts before you know it, everyone watching every move made. You’re thankful that you have a good view as you watch Sam on the field. After being with Sam for so many years you could almost sense what she was thinking on the field, watching how she watches where the ball goes.

Thirty five minutes in and still no goal, you could see both teams were getting frustrated.

You watch the ball get kicked to Sam, she passes it to Katrina who’s kicks it - an opposing team member getting it before Cailtin manages to steal it off them. She holds it for a few seconds before passing it to Hayley - the crowd starting to pick up with our team being so close to the net, you can’t help but join them.

You spot the second Hayley clocks it towards Sam, the way the ball falls into the goal, the crowd screaming their heads off, you included. Harper jumps up and down, squealing as you spin her up and plant kisses on the side of her head.

“Did you see that baby!” you happily squeal, her nodding her head as she throws her arms in the air. The surrounding fans that heard the interaction joining in with us in celebration.

Half time comes, the only goal being from Sam. You offer to grab the three of you drinks, but Linda tells you to stay with Harper and she’ll go get them You don’t argue because you were more than happy to hang out with Harper, but also you could feel yourself getting tired again.

Harper seems content enough with sitting in your lap, playing with your hair before moving her hands down to you belly.

“Baby?” her eyes don’t leave your stomach, as you run your hands over her little braids.

“Yeah, there’s a little baby in there Har” The baby gives a little kick, Harper looking up at you - her eyes completely wide open.

“What that?”

You laugh a little at her reaction, bringing one of your hands onto of her’s.

“It was the baby kicking, they were just saying hello”

She takes the answer with a serious nod, bringing her lips to your stomach and planting a kiss on them. “‘Ello baby” the baby kicks once again, almost in response. You let Harper continue to rub your belly, talking to it as you watch over the field.

Linda returns just as they blow the whistle for the start of the second half, although when you go to move Harper you both realise she’d fallen asleep.

The game moves on, and when that final whistle goes off Australia had won, four to nothing. The crowd screams with pride - the girls taking it all in. You don’t know how but Harper manages to stay sleep during the whole celebration, you rub her back as you stay seated - not wanting to awake her just yet.

The crowds start to move out, Linda saying she would meet the girls downstairs in the change room. You nod your head and tell her you’d stay here until Harper wakes up. You look down at the sleeping child in your lap, her head resting on your chest as you feel her breath on your shoulder.

You gave her a few more minutes, and just as you went to shake her awake she let out a small yawn as her eyes blinked open.

“Hey babygirl” you whisper, not wanting to startle her, she blinks her eyes a couple more times, nuzzling her head into your chest.

“Y/n?” her little voice makes you ‘coo’ as you tighten your grip just slightly.

“Yeah baby, it’s me”

“Mumma?”

“Yeah baby, we’re gonna see mumma. But I need you to let me get up okay” She nods her head, as she helps you move her over to the spare seat next to you. You bring yourself up as your stretch, running your hands down you stomach. You watch as Harper rubs her eyes, before grabbing her under the armpits and pulling her back into your arms. She rests her head back on your shoulder as you make your way up the stairs and towards the change rooms.

Once you had made it down under the stadium and towards the change rooms, the sounds of the team celebrating got louder and louder. You had almost expected Harper to get more energetic as you got closer, but she seem content with just laying on your shoulder - you didn’t mind either.

You spotted Linda soon enough, the girls in a circle as they celebrated. She catches your eye, and shakes her head as she looks at Harper in your arms - a smile on her face. You can see her hint at asking if you wanted her to take Harper of you but you shook your head, as you give a little bounce in your step.

Look around the circle, a smile on your face. You were so proud of the whole team, as everyone else watching them was. They continued to celebrate, you bopping along to the song they sang - making sure to still support Harper.

You lift your eyes off Harper and immediately catch Sam’s. Her mouth wide open, you watch her blink her eyes twice before breaking away from the circle and running towards you. The crowd seems to catch on as they let out calls and cheers.

“You’re here?” you let out a small laugh, as you nod your head. Katrina had made her way towards you guys too, taking Harper out of your hands.

“I’m here baby” You lip goes inbetween your teeth, the nerves from before coming back. Before you could go to apologise, Sam’s lips are on yours. Her hands grabbing onto your waist to pull you in closer. The cheering for the team manages to get louder, as you continue to kiss your wife.

She pulls away, her eyes slightly watery as she looks you up and down. She bends down, her hands now resting on the sides of your stomach as her lips press against the bump.

“Hi baby” she mumbles onto your stomach, planting a kiss before continuing “I’m so happy that you and your mumma gotta watch me win - even if she’s meant to be resting back home in London” you roll your eyes at the comment, giving a slight tug of her hair that your hand managed to find it’s way into during the whole ideal. She smirks a little at the reaction, coming back up so you were face to face.

“How are you here? We called last night and you were at home”

“I had just gotten off the plane, do you know how hard it is to find a quiet spot in the airport?”

She shakes her head, the smile never leaving her lips.

“You’re absolutely crazy - you know that?

You bring your lips back to hers, “Only for you baby. Only for you”

#sam kerr x reader #sam kerr imagines #sam kerr imagine #woso imagine #woso imagines #woso x reader #request

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weirdly-specific-but-ok · 1 month ago

Text

Morning News with Asmi 14 Oct '24

OOPS I FORGOT TO MAKE A POST YESTERDAY AND SO I GUESS 13TH OCTOBER WILL REMAIN A MYSTERY FOREVER. AAAAAA. ANYWAY HI IT'S TECHNICALLY MORNING OF 15TH TODAY BUT IT'S TOO EARLY TO CARE IT'S 14TH IN TEXAS MMKAY.

1. HURRICANE UPDATE: PEOPLE ARE NOW SHIPPING THE TWO HURRICANES. THERE'S FANART BASED ON THE VAGUE FACE SHAPES THEY MADE?? EVERYTHING IS FINE.

2. I MANAGED TO SURVIVE A VERY SMALL BIT OF THE SPICIEST CHIP IN THE WORLD EVEN THOUGH MY FRIEND WHO LIKES SPICY FOOD ATE THE SAME SIZE TEENY BIT.

3. THE BIRD, REDDIT, FLEW BACK HOME TO ITS HUMANS ON SUNDAY?? ITS HUMANS WERE THE CONSTRUCTION WORKERS FOR THE PLOT NEXT DOOR? SO... THE BIRD JUST WANTED A GODDAMN NIGHT AWAY AS A HOLIDAY WHILE ITS HUMANS WERE SEARCHING FRANTICALLY FOR IT?? IM

4. MY FRIEND INTRODUCED ALIEN STAGE TO ME LAST NIGHT (YEAH THREE OF US JUST RANDOMLY HAD A SLEEPOVER ON A MONDAY EVENING ART SCHOOL IS FINE WE'RE FINE) AND AAAAAAAAAAAAARGH IVAN MY BELOVED AAAAAH SUA AAAAA MIZI (FOR OUR PRINTMAKING CLASS, THE FRIEND--THE SAME ONE WHO THOUGHT TUMBLR WAS DEAD--MADE FANART OF THEM) OH NAAAAAAY CLEMATISSS AAAA

5. NORTH KOREA IS ABOUT TO ATTACK SOUTH KOREA APPARENTLY?

6. SOMEONE NAMED DAVID ALABA HAD AN INJURY WHICH MIGHT AFFECT HIS CHANCES AS REAL MADRID. WHAT THE FUCK IS REAL MADRID? FOOTBALL? CAR RACING? BASKETBALL? YAHTZEE?

7. I FINALLY LEARNED HOW TO PLAY UNO AND I WON THE FIRST PROPER GAME I PLAYED AND IT WAS OF UNO FLIP IM A GENIUS

AND NOW FOR THE WEATHER AND I SWEAR I WILL NOT FORGET ANY CONTINENTS THIS TIME

1. Australia: Hot and stinky. Just like me. I didn't shower yesterday.

2. Asia: Wet. Water. Wet wet sploosh. But not the ao3 way.

3. North America: Hurricane gay porn season I guess.

4. South America: Cloudy with a chance of moqueca.

5. Antarctica: ...still green. I wonder why my brain said piss-coloured. Green isn't piss. I mean. Piss isn't green. It's too early for this.

6. Europe: COZ IT'S TOO COLD FOR YOU HERE AND NOW SO LET ME HOLD BOTH YOUR HANDS IN THE HOLES OF MY SWEATER

7. Africa: The sun peeks out uwu from clouds

AND THE ANSWERS TO SATURDAYS CROSSWORD:

1. Baby food that adults can be allergic to: Milk. Well. It's not an allergy, it's an intolerance. Which involves different biological processes and not being able to digest it rather than the body reacting to an allergen. Shhhh. I never claimed to be smart.

2. Makes shitty copper: El-Nair (thanks @arkytiorlecter for that wild ride)

3. A condition that causes strong reactions to panic and pain at certain sounds: Misophonia (ily mad thanks for educating me @falling-raine)

4. A decaying virtual room of insanity orgies from the 10's: Tumblr

5. With ____, anything is possible: BARBIE!

IM TOO LAZY TO MAKE A CROSSWORD SO INSTEAD HAVE THE LESBIANS I PAINTED FOR MY PRINT-MAKING (MY OC'S)

AND BANGALORE PALACE WHICH I VISITED ON SUNDAY:

I LOVE YOU FORGIVE ME FOR MY NEGLIGENCE HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY/NIGHT MAGGOTS OF MINE

#morning news #castle #lesbian art #hurricane milton #hurricane helene #weirdly specific but ok #asmi #maggots #what is even happening #tumblr

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f1version · 9 months ago

Note

Congratulations! Your works are amazing! You totally deserved this. Can i please request a headcannons about a secret reliationship between mick schumacher and a female driver?

KISSING IN SECRET ★ MSC47

pairing: mick schumacher x merc driver!reader ( she/her ) word count: 1679 warnings: mentions of misogyny !!!

2k celebration ★ general masterlist

Love comes easy to you and Mick—friends for too long, eager to make up for the time lost. What’s hard is the nature of your relationship; secrecy protecting your peace.

It begins at a pub in Austin, 2021. You were celebrating your first win for Mercedes, and even though his result was far from good, Mick decided to tag along. Then, all it took was a couple of shots, a bit of dancing, and a lonely corner to blur the lines of friendship and fall on each other’s lips.

A week of tension, anxiety, and avoidance later, you were falling asleep in his arms, heavy breathing and soft touches all over your body.

Now your life is based on clandestine meetings, brushing fingers or stolen kisses, and a well put illusion of friendship.

And no one ever thought much about your closeness, not until Mick moved to Mercedes in 2023.

When people saw Mercedes’ star driver sharing so closely with the new guy—one whose performance didn’t leave people’s mouths,—they prayed for a big story. By the time Australia rolled by, the PR team requested distance while the cameras were on.

And it wasn't as if these types of requests were foreign to you; misogyny was a thing after all, but you were never in love with George, or Lewis, or Alex, or Lance, or anyone but Mick. It was frustrating, but it didn't change a lot of things—especially because Mick was a reserve driver.

Of course, the topic would make it into your conversations:

“Do you think it would be a disaster? I mean going public.” Mick asked almost out of nowhere. You were lying on his chest, freshly showered after a disappointing Austrian GP. “Maybe. It will most likely follow us forever.” You said, and he sighed, “Do you think the team would be okay with it?” “I think they care about us enough.”

There were stories about this. Drivers within the same teams having such a strong relationship (let it be romantic or platonic, who knows) that they destroy not only their’s but the team’s trust.

Both of you believe Lewis knows. Your only evidence being the small pep talk he gave you moments before his last race in the sport, in 2022. Something about being selfish, about how this sport will always judge, so you might as well take what you want.

You wanted everything. To be selfish, to take your time, to figure everything out first, but also to just be reckless. You didn’t tell him that; you just expressed your gratitude.

The European arm makes it a bit easier. Motorhomes are used, and hotel rooms become unnecessary. It’s as simple as walking into a room and not caring about avoiding people in the hallway; your only excuse is your well-known friendship.

You love spending nights laughing, kissing, crying, and everything in between.

You were reckless, and learned to be as careful as you needed after the George incident™

It happened in Belgium; the race and debrief ending hours ago. You were in your room, boyfriend sneaking in to talk about the race, which ended in a very lovely make-out session. And that’s when (clueless) George decided to knock on your door.

Mick ran to your closet, making a mess of your race suits to be able to close the door. You, absolutely terrified of the Paddock’s Gossip Girl, threw a blanket over your body, taking a deep breath before facing George’s comments of: “You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” and “Also hit by a truck,” and “Need help with the suits?”

You rolled your eyes and had him complain about the car with you for forty-seven minutes. Mick could barely feel his legs after that one.

At some point, the team starts talking. More about Mick having a crush than anything—especially since he doesn't deny it. But it’s mostly a joke; no one takes it too seriously until that teasing reaches Toto’s ears.

For a second, you were ready to be called to his office and hear him talk about how he supported whoever you chose to love, but that if someone or something was making you uncomfortable, you must tell him.

You had always been grateful for those talks. In the end, you knew they were there because of how ruthless the media had been in 2020, after your first dating rumors with a driver—with George, out of all people, your teammate then and your teammate now. George who had (and has) a girlfriend. It had been an awful sophomore season, to say the least.

This was different, though. This was not the media making up things; this was his own team talking about his reserve driver having a crush on his driver. This could be a different story.

Here’s the thing: You had never heard the teasing in person, you knew of it because of Mick. You spent nights laughing at it together, making up responses he could give to hard launch your relationship. They never got out of the coziness of your bed, but it was fun.

That particular day wasn’t Mick gossiping, that day you were there, and it caught you off guard. A good off-guard, you were ready to laugh it off.

But Toto was also there, mistaking your surprise for discomfort. And so you weren’t called to his office, you stood next to him during a 20-minute talk on professionalism, respect, and boundaries.

You were grateful, not knowing where that joke could end up… But still, you and Mick laughed the whole night.

Also, I would be lying if I said it didn’t set off an alarm, bringing to the table a thought you had been trying to avoid: the consequences of public. The need for security.

Consequences mean a lot to people, especially in your sport. A driver’s health could be destroyed by not acknowledging them after all.

For you, consequences meant having the media hang on to it forever to diminish your work. It means being called names, be harassed by fans. Means being accused of taking advantage of your power. It could even mean closing doors to other female drivers because misogyny is a thing.

For Mick, it means another reason for his place in Mercedes to be questioned. “Who knows how long they have been dating?” “She and his last name gave him a place.” It means being portrayed as an exploiter, his relationship reduced to an unethical plan to get back on track. Means being praised at your expense.

But there are pros. There’s a necessity to continue changing people’s minds, to be happy, selfish, and own it.

Summer break gets in the way of those conversations though...

Breaks are your favorite part of the year (as a couple). You either stay in Switzerland or avoid the so-called “hard launch islands,” where drivers pretend obliviousness towards snapping pictures of them and their partners.

(Sebastian Vettel gave it the name by the way)

“What if we soft launch?” You asked one morning, scrolling through Pinterest and looking at all the ways a soft launch could happen. Mick choked on his drink, coughing a bit before answering, “I’m so sorry, babe, but what?” “Hear me out! We can have people know we are in a relationship, but they don't have to know it’s us yet. It can be a years-long soft launch if we want.”

Mick stared at you for a whole minute, smirk following it. He thought it was brilliant, laughing while trying to properly kiss you.

“We have to tell PR, tho.”

Two weeks later, you called on a meeting with PR, lawyers, and Toto, they had no idea what would be discussed.

Toto's eyes went wide as he saw you and Mick enter the room together, and everyone followed his motion after you briefly explained the situation.

Your PR manager spoke first, “I won't lie and tell you it’s going to be easy; both of you understand how cruel the media is, but I also don’t think it will be as hard as we imagine... if you go public, of course.”

Then Toto started talking about how, to some extent, he understood your worries. How “People will talk sh*t all the time; you need to unconditionally support each other so it doesn’t kill you.” He gave the support talk and visited a couple of logistical questions.

Five days later, Mick had soft-launched his girlfriend, and five weeks after that, you had a boyfriend.

Eventually, you told some friends (those who didn’t know already.)

George was 100% not surprised. He grins and shouts, "Knew it!” and suggests a double date with him and Carmen. (To that plan, other couples are added—Alex, Lance, Esteban, etc.)

It turns out, with the help of your team and the correct people, everything becomes easier. From interacting in front of the cameras to booking rooms.

One of your favorite things is the teasing your friends/colleagues give Mick after you score a podium. He starts giggling and muttering about how proud he is of you, cheeks turning pink and eyes unable to leave you.

Mick loves sitting next to you during debriefing, letting you play with his hand under the table when anxiety strikes.

It feels good. Not to be so secret around the paddock.

“You know I love you, right?” “Yeah, but I love you more.” “Okay, competitive!”

Sometimes you want everyone to know. Surprise the world with Mick being the guy on your Instagram, and Mick feeling the need to shout in everyone’s faces that his girlfriend wasn't the model they speculated to be.

The third year of your relationship, 2024, is the hardest. There are eyes on you all season, commentary becomes stronger as you fight with Max on track, and so rumors of your relationship with Mick arise.

Mick hates everything being said about you and eventually can’t hold back the need to be loud about it. And so do you.

Both of you want to be selfish. Take whatever you want out of this sport. Who cares what people say.

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sweatervest-obsessed · 1 year ago

Note

spencer just comforting reader after a bad mental health day and helping them to take a break and shower/or bathe🌼🫶🏻

Honestly, yeah. So true. I based this off of my experiences of just trying to even get out of bed to get to the shower, so I hope you like it!!!

“I see you’re still in bed.”

“Oh my god. You really are a genius.”

Spencer doesn’t miss much, especially not the sarcasm in your voice. He’s pretty perceptive when it comes to you. He knows what coffee order to get you by the way you kiss him in the morning. He knows what book you’ll want to read when you get home by the way you sign your name. He knows that for you to have stayed in bed all day means that you really just need someone to be there for you.

And that’s what he’ll do.

He quietly toes off his shoes and climbs onto his side of the bed—close enough that you can feel the heat coming from his body, but far away enough because he doesn’t know if you wanted to be touched.

Your head was your worst enemy some days. And it’s not like you didn’t try to fight it, you tried so fucking hard. You had even picked out an outfit and laid it on the chair next to the bathroom. But once you flipped the light switch on in the bathroom and saw yourself in the mirror; your brain flipped a switch too.

Which resulted with all the lights off, and you just in bed, over thinking and falling further and further into the pit of your mind.

Spencer whispered your name, bringing you back from where it was your mind had wandered off to again.

Nowhere good was the conclusion he came to. He gently placed his hand on your arms, waiting to see your reaction.

He watched as your body released some of the tension it was holding, and took that as his sign.

Spencer managed to take your hand and squeeze it slightly. “Want to take a shower?”

“That requires moving.” You stated.

There was no malice, but there was no excitement. Just a fact.

“Maybe you’re the genius.” He teased slightly, squeezing your hand. It caused you to let out a huff of air, which was all he could ask for.

Spencer has been to a dark place before. He knew some variation of what you were felling, how heavy it was, how your brain felt like tv static. He had discovered along the way, that the best way to be there for you, was to shower.

Something something about the metaphor of washing it down the drain. is what you would say when he’d ask you about it a couple of months ago, poking fun at yourself.

“Can’t we do a bath instead.”

Your voice cut through the memory. It was so unlike your normal voice; small, exhausted. It caused him to run his thumb across your hand, nodding.

“You’d have to get up for that too.”

“I hate it when you’re right.” You grumbled, rolling over just enough to be able to lift your head and make eye contact with the pretty man sitting next to you.

“I’m always right.”

That caused you to snort, a small laugh escaped your lips. It was one short second, but it meant the world to Spencer.

“Lavender or Vanilla.”

“You can’t make me get up and also make choices.” Your face rolled back into the pillow, but your hand still held onto his.

His hand was so warm, so soft. His heartbeat was pulling your focus from whatever place your mind had been stuck in. You knew what he was doing, distracting you, making you match his breathing, but you didn’t care.

Spencer didn’t move to go set up the bath. He stayed there rubbing you hand with his thumb, enjoying your company because you were enough for him. Just your presence was enough.

“Tell me something.” You mumbled, wanting to hear him, slightly upset that he stopped talking.

“Did you know that Australia is wider than the moon.”

You frowned a bit and looked up at him. That one caught you off guard. “What.”

“The moon is 2,113 miles wide, or 3,400 kilometers, and Australia is 2,485 miles, or 4,000 kilometers, wide.”

“That feels wrong.” You mutter, squeezing his hand.

“Right? Okay, how about Bert and Ernie from Sesame Street are named after the police officer and the taxi driver in Its a Wonderful Life.”

“I knew that already.” You smiled at him slightly. “You’re losing your touch.”

He smiled down at you, leaning over and gently kissing your forehead, making all of the tension float away.

“How about a bath now.”

“Sounds like you’re just trying to get me naked Doctor Reid.”

That made Spencer’s cheeks tinge pink. “No-No. I just…I know that, uh, when people have depressive episodes they tend to ignore their hygiene because the feel like they don’t deserve it and it’s a Monday meaning you were going to shower this morning, and-and I know you didn’t because there’s no towel on the hook on the bathroom door and—“

You squeezed his hand, effectively ending his breathless ramble. “I’m teasing Spence.”

“How did that turn into you comforting me.” He sighed and squeezed your hand back.

Eventually, the two of you made it to the bathroom. It was lavender scented with hints of the coconut, barely any light from the two candles Spencer had lit, opting out of turning the lights on. Shirts and socks were littered across the ground as you both sank into the water. The heat causing the rest of the headache you were feeling yo disappear, or maybe it was the man sitting behind you with his arms wrapped around your waist. Your skin against his.

The steam cleared your senses, filling your nose with the smell of his shampoo as he tried to quietly open the bottle, causing you to giggle slightly as he fumbled with the lid.

You melted under Spencer’s hands as he massaged your head, kissing your shoulders as he went.

That small part of you whispered in your ear that you didn’t deserve this.

But Spencer’s whispers in your other ear easily drowned it out, slowly bringing you back to him, piece by piece, soap bubble by soap bubble, kiss by kiss.

#x reader #spencer reid x fem!reader #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x you #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid angst #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid drabble #spencer reid oneshot

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skipper1331 · 1 year ago

Text

Your someone // Mary Fowler

a/n: based off this request.

"See you soon?" Mary asked, hugging you. Camp was officially over and everyone made their way back to their clubs.

Mary about to go back to Manchester while you would stay in Australia, "yeah, yeah of course" you replied, still holding on to her. It was a known fact for all your team mates that parting you from each other was hard, you would not see one another until the next camp. As well it was a common fact that you were in love with the other yet not acting on your feelings. 'I don‘t want to ruin our friendship' or 'she doesn‘t like me the way I like her'

"Do you ever think they‘ll admit that they‘re in love?" Macca asked Caitlin as they watched you hug.

"End of the next season they‘re a couple, wanna bet?" the gunner asked smirking, aware of conversations between you and City.

"Do you know something I don‘t?"

As the months went by the details of your transfer were clarified, your move to Man City was confirmed but nobody really knew. Manchester City went to sign you under the radar, the only one who knew was your home club, not even Mary, your best friend, knew about your joining.

As you arrived at City a member of the staff showed you around the facility and told you about the club history. You did a photoshoot to announce your signing and some q&a videos so that the fans could get to know you.

The next day, you left your house to go to training. It was the official start for you at a new club, in a new country. You're nervous but very happy. You got to see Mary again, that's what you've been looking forward to the most the time.

You stepped in to the facility, making your way to the changing room, ready for your first session.

"Hi" - "Hello" many girls greeting you with open arms but the one girl you hoped would be there wasn‘t. The girls were nice and you enjoyed to get to know them but someone was missing, your someone.

You were talking to Lauren and Chloe whilst the three of you walked out.

And then there was your someone. She looked stunning as always. It was as if she could feel the familiar feeling of peace coming over her, the feeling of security she felt when she was close to you. She turned around, not knowing why she would feel that, you‘re miles away or so she thought.

What she saw made her heart stop beating. She saw you. In a city shirt. Her mind was blown: is this real? how come she didn‘t know?

Faster than you could say wow she was at your side with her arms around your waist, giving you a famous Mary Fowler hug which was only reserved for you. "What‘re you doing here? Oh my gosh." Her hands cupped your cheeks squeezing them. "I‘m your new team mate" you grinned, feeling more than happy. "And you didn‘t tell me? I don‘t know If I should slap you or kiss you" the striker whined not realizing what she just said. Your cheek burnt red, heart racing as you whispered "i would prefer the last" but Mary didn‘t hear it, already telling you some stories yet still having at least one arm around you.

All day the australian could only smile. she hated it not being around you, that you were in a different time zone than her but now? You‘re here. She was happier than ever.

As training finished the team showered and changed, Mary not leaving her eyes off you. There were so many feelings in her: joy that you were here. Heart racing because you were here. "Let me take you out on a date" Mary said as the both of you left the changing room after saying bye to the girls. "What?"

"A date. You and me. I want to take you out on a real date" she clarified, her fingers lacing with your own. You stopped im your tracks, was she messing with you? You waited so long for this to happen but where was this coming from? "Let me- Let me show you how you deserve to be treated"

"Okay." you answered, not trusting your voice or your heart.

"I‘ll pick you up at 7. Casual clothes" she pressed a quick kiss to your cheeks before running to her car "Ah! Text me your address" she added yelling.

On point at 7, Mary was at your house. Her hands were sweaty, she was nervous. There was no way she would to screw this up. This was maybe the only chance she would get with you. "You look great" the forward said smiling as you exited your home, "thank you, you look awesome" returning the compliment.

The date went on smooth, Mary showered you in compliments and treated you like a queen. She was truly amazing. It was like always when you were together, you laughed, joked around, were affectionate but this was more meaningful on so many levels.

"I had a great time, thank you" you told the girl who you‘d been crushing on since for ever. "Maybe I can take you out again?" she asked nervously, shuffling with her feet as she put a loose strand of hair behind your ear "I‘d like that" your cheeks turned red as well did Mary‘s. She scanned your face, not getting enough of your beauty.

"fuck it"

Her hands grasped your neck, pulling you in for a kiss. She had to bend down to reach your lips due your height difference while your hands rested on her chest. Not wanting the kiss to end, it still came to end as you both smiled so bright against each others lips "i’ve wanted to do that since I saw you the first time in an Australia jersey," she admitted, pecking your lips again, "see you tomorrow?"

"Yeah" you answered, completely dazed.

Your first days in Manchester were not only the start of a new chapter in your football career but also the start of a new chapter with Mary being more than just your best friend.

She was your someone.

—————————

#mary fowler #mary fowler x reader #matildas #australia women #woso fanfics #woso x reader #woso #man city women #auswnt x reader #auswnt #matildas x reader

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mimicocoaus · 1 year ago

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The Pros of a Shower Base: Enhancing Your Bathroom Experience

When it comes to bathroom renovations or new construction, choosing the right stone shower bases Australia is an important decision. A shower base, also known as a shower pan or shower tray, is the foundation of your shower. It not only provides a functional surface for showering but also plays a significant role in the overall design and durability of your bathroom. In this blog post, we will explore the various benefits of installing a shower base and how it can enhance your bathroom experience.

Easy Installation and Maintenance

One of the top advantages of a shower base is its ease of installation. Unlike traditional tile showers, which require intricate and time-consuming installation, a shower base can be quickly and easily installed in your bathroom. Most shower bases come as a one-piece unit, eliminating the need for grout and reducing the chances of leaks over time. Additionally, shower bases are low-maintenance, as their smooth surface is easy to clean and resistant to stains and mould.

Waterproof and Leakproof

Leakage and water damage are common concerns in bathrooms, especially in shower areas. A shower base provides a waterproof and leakproof barrier, protecting the underlying structure from water penetration. With proper installation and sealing, the shower base Australia ensures that water stays confined to the shower area, minimising the risk of damage to walls, floors, and adjacent areas. This not only preserves the integrity of your bathroom but also prolongs its lifespan.

Enhanced Accessibility and Safety

For individuals with mobility issues, a shower base can significantly improve accessibility and safety. Many shower bases are designed with non-slip surfaces, providing better traction and reducing the risk of slips and falls. Some bases also offer customisable options, such as low thresholds or ramped edges, making it easier for wheelchair users or those with limited mobility to enter and exit the shower safely.

Versatile Design Options

Shower bases come in a wide range of designs, sizes, and materials, allowing you to choose the perfect fit for your bathroom style and preferences. Whether you prefer a classic look, a sleek and modern design, or something in between, you can find a shower base that complements your overall bathroom aesthetics. From different colours and textures to various materials such as acrylic, fibreglass, or solid surfaces, the design possibilities are endless.

Customisable Features

In addition to design options, shower bases also offer customisable features to enhance your showering experience. Some bases come with built-in seating options, allowing you to have a comfortable place to sit while showering. Others offer recessed storage shelves or niches for keeping your shower essentials within reach. These customisable features add convenience and functionality to your shower space, making your daily routine more enjoyable.

Cost-Effective Solution

Compared to tiling the entire shower area, installing a shower base is a cost-effective solution. Shower bases are generally less expensive than tile and require less labour for installation. Additionally, they eliminate the need for frequent regrouting and resealing, reducing long-term maintenance costs. With a shower base, you can achieve a high-quality, durable shower system without breaking the bank.

Increased Property Value

Investing in a shower base is not only beneficial for your enjoyment but also adds value to your property. A well-designed and functional bathroom is a desirable feature for potential buyers. A properly installed and maintained shower base demonstrates attention to detail and quality, making your home more attractive to potential buyers and potentially increasing its resale value.

Conclusion

A shower base Australia offers numerous advantages that enhance both the functionality and aesthetics of your bathroom vanities. From easy installation and low maintenance to waterproofing and customisable design options, a shower base is a practical and cost-effective solution. Whether you're renovating your bathroom or building a new one, investing in a quality shower base can significantly improve your showering experience and add value to your home.

So, why not consider a shower base for your next bathroom project and upgrade your daily routine?

#stone shower bases Australia

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spacetimewithstuartgary · 23 days ago

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New SpaceTime out Friday

SpaceTime 20241101 Series 27 Episode 132

Could Betelgeuse be two stars

A new study has raised the possibility that the red supergiant Betelgeuse might actually be a binary star system.

Richard Branson to co-pilot first crewed flight for Space Perspective

Virgin boss Richard Branson will co-pilot Space Perspective’s first stratospheric balloon flight.

Australia looking at developing more space ports.

Although Australia hasn’t put anything in orbit since the glory days of the Woomera Rocket range over half a century ago plans for new space ports continue to surface with Western Australia and Queensland the latest to make a proposal.

November Skywatch

The giant spiral galaxy M31 Andromeda. the Crab Nebula M1 and three meteor showers are among the highlights of the November night skies on Skywatch.

SpaceTime covers the latest news in astronomy & space sciences.

The show is available every Monday, Wednesday and Friday through Apple Podcasts (itunes), Stitcher, Google Podcast, Pocketcasts, SoundCloud, Bitez.com, YouTube, your favourite podcast download provider, and from www.spacetimewithstuartgary.com

SpaceTime is also broadcast through the National Science Foundation on Science Zone Radio and on both i-heart Radio and Tune-In Radio.

SpaceTime daily news blog: http://spacetimewithstuartgary.tumblr.com/

SpaceTime facebook: www.facebook.com/spacetimewithstuartgary

SpaceTime Instagram @spacetimewithstuartgary

SpaceTime twitter feed @stuartgary

SpaceTime YouTube: @SpaceTimewithStuartGary

SpaceTime -- A brief history

SpaceTime is Australia’s most popular and respected astronomy and space science news program – averaging over two million downloads every year. We’re also number five in the United States. The show reports on the latest stories and discoveries making news in astronomy, space flight, and science. SpaceTime features weekly interviews with leading Australian scientists about their research. The show began life in 1995 as ‘StarStuff’ on the Australian Broadcasting Corporation’s (ABC) NewsRadio network. Award winning investigative reporter Stuart Gary created the program during more than fifteen years as NewsRadio’s evening anchor and Science Editor. Gary’s always loved science. He studied astronomy at university and was invited to undertake a PHD in astrophysics, but instead focused on his career in journalism and radio broadcasting. Gary’s radio career stretches back some 34 years including 26 at the ABC. He worked as an announcer and music DJ in commercial radio, before becoming a journalist and eventually joining ABC News and Current Affairs. He was part of the team that set up ABC NewsRadio and became one of its first on air presenters. When asked to put his science background to use, Gary developed StarStuff which he wrote, produced and hosted, consistently achieving 9 per cent of the national Australian radio audience based on the ABC’s Nielsen ratings survey figures for the five major Australian metro markets: Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Adelaide, and Perth. The StarStuff podcast was published on line by ABC Science -- achieving over 1.3 million downloads annually. However, after some 20 years, the show finally wrapped up in December 2015 following ABC funding cuts, and a redirection of available finances to increase sports and horse racing coverage. Rather than continue with the ABC, Gary resigned so that he could keep the show going independently. StarStuff was rebranded as “SpaceTime”, with the first episode being broadcast in February 2016. Over the years, SpaceTime has grown, more than doubling its former ABC audience numbers and expanding to include new segments such as the Science Report -- which provides a wrap of general science news, weekly skeptical science features, special reports looking at the latest computer and technology news, and Skywatch – which provides a monthly guide to the night skies. The show is published three times weekly (every Monday, Wednesday and Friday) and available from the United States National Science Foundation on Science Zone Radio, and through both i-heart Radio and Tune-In Radio.

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princescribbler · 2 years ago

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5 PROFOUNDLY Underrated AB/DL and/or Ageplay Experiences!

These are ENTIRELY based on my own experience with @giggle-byte and may not match your own experiences or capacity. That said, if the ideas below worked for us, repeatedly and well, maybe you'll enjoy too!

BUILD A BEAR! Seriously, I had never gone or ever really wanted to until momma and I were together this year and suddenly we HAD to. In fact I was feeling pretty big and switch-y with my cute princess, so we both kinda ended up having little time... and her adorable new set rabbit friend, and my new cute eevee (with a ravenclaw scarf and sorting hat, I couldn't resist) made us both feel miniscule!!! SO FUN.

Going to a zoo, aquarium, or nature park. Now, I've done this multiple times with momma now, both in the States and in upside-down-backwards-land, which is what I call Australia when I'm feeling cute and little. It's sublime. Childish wonder, public without feeling exposed, often able to discretely change a pull up or diaper if needed, with the chance to see cool animals and learn and feel wonder?????? YES PLEASE!!!

SNUGGLE CENTRAL MORNINGS! This is a criminally underrated experience... when you wake up, and don't even have to get out of bed to get cuddles. Now, some cg/l dynamics are long distance or don't share a bedroom. Well guess what? You just need to call! Seriously, a SUPER underrated cg/l experience is being able to get really morning cuddles and affection without even having to get out of bed. If you can be the little spoon, even better. Little spoon WITH stuffies, and maybe even being so cozy you both fall back asleep? It'll be like waking in a cloud made of coziness. YOU NEED TO TRY THIS ONE!!!! THE BEST way to wake up is, in fact, extended sleepy time snuggles.

SEX SHOP(PE)! NO, I'm sincere here! They were knowledgeable and kink aware, they clearly had no idea what me and momma were up to, and it was immediately apparent that they thought anything beyond fluffy handcuffs was probably a bit too kinky for their shop... but momma still got a lovely light mini crop with feathers on one end (more for the sensory play than impact of any kind!) And she got me a glans ring to try. I guess just being able to publicly go somewhere kink aware and safe made us both feel very seen and kinky and fun! Would strongly recommend for those who can safely go!

Being given a shower or bath, while your caregiver stays mostly clothed or even JOINS you. Truly you'll never feel as adorably little as when your mommy or daddy make you bend over to get between your butt cheeks, or tells you to shut your eyes tight while they wash your hair, or give you a bath toy to keep you occupied. You think that's good? Try the towel-drying and teasing and giggling, all at once... it's indecent how adorably little and cute you'll feel! If they make you dry extra thoroughly to get you re-padded you'll lie down feeling about an inch tall at biggest!

And as always, Stay happy, stay healthy, and stay kinky! -Scribbler

#ab/dl lifestyle #24/7 diapers #ab/dl kink #cg/l relationship #md/lb relationship #switch relationship #giggle byte #diapered #ab/dl babyboy

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carvedpumpk1n · 9 months ago

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Körangi eldritch horror au has been living rent free in my head for weeks.

König is a Cthulhu-like creature, and Horangi in a last desperate attempt to get rid of his debt summons him. What Horangi doesn’t know is that König is a higher being within the depth with a bunch of power, so this Eldritch creature is loving on him and showering him in love while also being a widely feared being.

König calls Horangi “Gemahlin” (translates to “wife”) and Horangi doesn’t understand what he’s calling him, but he assumes it’s a pet name. (Idea from: CaptainMJ on Ao3)

After Körangi have been together for around a year or so, Horangi decides to join the Military, but only because König joins with him. König has the ability to appear semi-human, but not fully so that’s why he wears the mask. In Königs human form his face is a pitch black void with many eyes, and he has three tongues, representing the Cthulhu part of him.

Horangi after being courted by König and becoming his genuine “Gemahlin” has an imprint on his ring finger that appears as if a tattooed on wedding ring, but in actuality is a Eldritch marking of territory. (So Horangi basically belongs to König)

König never socialize with anyone unless necessary, obviously excluding Horangi, he will use any excuse to talk to his beloved. Nobody on base knows or suspects their marriage or König not being human. Sure people make comments about his abnormal height but they know it’s not impossible to be abnormally tall. König puts up a shy front for people around their teammates but he lets go often during battle, hence why he’s so ruthless. König often brings Horangi away from gambling on base between missions, and Horangi is forever thankful for König.

Horangi calls König “여보” (pronounced ‘Yeobo’) which translates to “Darling” and König melts every time he calls him it.

When König is happy, he makes gargled noises and says weird Eldritch words that Horangi can only assume mean positive things.

By the time the two males(?) are retired they have two homes. One of them is a big house in the countryside of Germany. Their first choice was Australia, but Horangi was terrified of the thought of finding a huntsman spider in the house/around it. The other residence around them say they thought only Horangi lived in the house alone because there was no other sign of life besides him, but were all greatly surprised when Horangi brought König out with him one day to shop around the local market.

Their second house is a pocket area within the depth, a nice corner for them to enjoy themselves without the fear of anyone hearing them, or a place where König can feel extra comfort when required. The depth is a warm place for König, so when he’s in need for comfort he wraps himself in the smooth void of the depth and just floats. Forgetting all human issues.

Kissing is difficult when König is in his pure (and most comfortable) form, because he has the Cthulhu mouth, so either Horangi kisses the tentacles, or König wraps his tentacles around Horangi’s face and they kiss mouth-to-mouth, which is awkward.

I hope you enjoyed my Eldritch monster Körangi au!

#cod #konig cod #horangi #korangi #eldritch #eldritch konig #cthulhu #the sillies #i love them

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in-death-we-fall · 2 years ago

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Sex, Drugs and One Armed Groupies

...is gonna be the title of this since there kinda isn't one. Scans were posted by @fuckyeswednesday13 a long time ago. I really liked this article and now it's nice and easy to read (especially the columns. Ask me how much I hated the columns.) Enjoy! (drive link)

UPDATED FULL VERSION HERE

The Big Day Out. The Australian travelling musical circus that steamrolls its way around Australia and New Zealand every winter with the hottest bands on the planet flying from all over the globe to join down under’s best bands in a mayhem filled fortnight. This year’s line-up, features among others, The Foo Fighters, Queens of the Stone Age, Jane’s Addiction, Jimmy Eat World, The Hard Ons and deathglam monstrosities, the Murderdolls. So far, the Mid West (sic) based five-piece outfit have been the cream of the festival, appropriately headlining the ‘Essentials’ stage. This is the band’s first time in the Antipodes and quizzical music fans have crowded to see the much-talked about live set. With Sydney copping the biggest crowds of all the legs on the tour, the band are preparing something special. But at 3pm in the afternoon you wouldn’t know it. Most of the band are still in bed from the night before, well, actually… the week before.

The ‘Dolls have been in Sydney for five days before their Big Day Out show and not finding much to do early on in the week they’ve just been getting down to the (sic) rock’n’roll’s most popular pastime: hard drinking. Drummer ‘Big’ Ben ‘The Ghoul’ Graves and bass player Eric Griffin are recovering from last night’s binge. While singer Wednesday and guitarist Joey Jordison are recovering from the night before the night before. Acey Slade, who maintains his sobriety, but still stays out ‘til dawn, has been up since 11am and is the only one ready for the show. With the band on stage at 7:15pm, things need doing. Staggering through their beer can and ‘paraphernalia’-strewn rooms to the showers, they’re down in their van and on the way out to the Big Day Out site just after 4pm.

Situated at the same place that hosted the Sydney 2000 olympics, the festival facilities are first rate and the sell-out crowd of 52,000 festival-goers are making the most of it. The temperature’s pushing a blistering 35°C and being the middle of a drought-ridden summer in Australia, everything’s dry, dusty and cracked. It’s a good 40-minute drive from the city to the festival and the sun’s stinging in through the van windows. Not big fans of the sunlight, the Murderdolls have got their leather jackets up over their heads to avoid even the slightest hint of a tan.

In the cool, air-conditioned shade of backstage I get to sit down with Joey Jordison and singer Wednesday 13 to gind out how the band are doing after their meteoric rise over the past eight months. Joey is straight down the line, measured and professional. “This si the first Big Day Out for all of us. Slipknot have only been down here once but not that (sic) this festival. This is something I’ve really wanted to play – something I’ve wanted to do for a really long time.”

For Wednesday, this is another notch on his rise as an international rock’n’roller. “It’s awesome,” he says. “I’ve always wanted to be out on the front of a rock’n’roll band at a festival like this. After struggling doing my own band for six years I actually quit my job back in April and I’ve been touring every since. I’ve done all the things I ever dreamed about. I’ve been to Europe three times, Japan twice and here we are now in Australia and that has all been pretty much in the last six months! Holy shit we’re doing some things that some bands have never done!”

“We just checked out the videotape from the Auckland show the other day and fuck man, it was awesome!” enthuses Joey. “People are saying we are pulling the most people to that stage out of everyone. Our band has been doing really well especially since we’ve only been going for a short time. We hope that after the BDO we’ll be able to come back and do some real headlining shows down here. We are having fun though, thinking about it, we’ve never had so many days off between shows before, it’s more like the Big Day Off!”

The band wasn’t supposed to be so idle. Most overseas bands on the BDO bill play a bunch of satellite shows in various cities around the country and for a month prior, the Murderdolls had been slated to perform a Sydney show with fellow US rockers The Deftones. But with very little warning, the Murderdolls were dumped from the bill just before the show. What really pissed off Joey and the lads was a lot of the Murderdolls fans had bought tickets on the basis that the band would be playing but in the end had to watch the Deftones supported by ex-At The Drive-In chancers, Sparta.

Without much choice in the matter the Murderdolls issued a statement on their website apologising to their fans and kept trying to fly their flag with some instore appearances at local record stores. One in particular at Utopia Records, was insane. There was such a roar when the band turned up, they looked truly surprised at the number of kids who had showed up, most dressed in black and red outfits.

“Someone told us there was only going to be about 150 kids, which was supposed to be a good turn-out for Utopia records for a new band,” retells Joey. “But when we turned up there (sic) almost 500! We talked to fans and signed everything that they had. We were there for a good three and a half hours. And at the Channel V interview it was pretty much the same story. Hordes of kids that wouldn’t let us get away.”

“That’s the cool thing with our fans,” explains Wednesday. “We’re not a radio band or an MTV band with this created army of little kids which I think is more pure than being the Number One radio band or liking it because someone tells you to like it. I know that our fans are real. It is really cool to see these hordes of kids show up, they are dressed like us, they know everything about us, it is just awesome.”

Thinking further ahead fans will be please to know the band are not going to let up on the groundswell already created by the Murderdolls. “I have to go back and finish recording some Slipknot stuff,” reveals Joey. “Then we (the Murderdolls) are going to do some more touring. There’s usually a three to four month sort of break between recording and when an album comes out so we are going to tour pretty much all the way from the end of May all the way to maybe the beginning of October. Which will be good because there’ll be less sunlight at that time of year,” jokes Wednesday raising his non-existent eyebrows and throwing his arms, heavily tattooed with b-grade horror heroes, into the air.

As the hot afternoon drifts into an only slightly less simmering evening, there’s a small problem with guitarist Acey. He’s got indigestion. This amounts to a small crisis because first aid officials must follow procedure and administer the medicine. This takes two St. John’s Ambulance men on pushbikes in a five minute ride from their base at the side of the main stadium. Very un-rock’n’roll indeed.

With the gig just 45 minutes away, the boys are pacing around their trailer, having their pics taken for Hammer. Acey inside in front of the mirror still applying the last of his make-up, Ghoul is getting powdered up, Wednesday’s still with the photographer, while Joey’s nervously pacing around, in the trailer, out the trailer, back in… Eric meanwhile is ready for the stage and cracks open the obligatory bottle of Jack Daniel’s. As a Murderdolls ritual, they’re applying the slap, the band have to listen to Kiss. “Must. Have. Kiss.” stipulates Joey. “‘All American Man’! We sometimes change that to ‘All American Ghoul’,” chimes in the Ghoul.

Just 10 minutes before showtime and the long lanky frame of Ben Graves is stretched spider-like up against the dressing room wall. “I’ll be in pain afterwards,” he explains. Wednesday has by now finished his solo shots with Hamer’s photographer. The day is hot enough anyway, and under the photographers lights the heat is even more stifling. ‘Jesus, it’s fucking hot!” exclaims the frontman. “But I don’t mind… I’m a naturally dead person in front of a camera” he laughs.

More Kiss blares out from the dressing room, this time ‘Dr Love’! Then the moment comes: ground fucking zero at the Big Day Out! The band clamber into the van and head around the back way to the Essentials stage. The bottle of Jack’s being passed around as they approach the stage the band take a quick peak (sic) to see how the crow’s building up. It’s the biggest yet, taking up most of the grassy area out the back of the main stadium. Joey – who regularly suffers from pre-gig nerves as his pre-stage vomiting on Slipknot’s ‘Disasterpiece (sic)’ DVD proves in all its technicolour glory – is bricking it.

Five minutes before the band are due to hit the powerchords and the guys are milling around in the wings. Ghoul is banging on some warm-up pads and everyone is getting psyched. They’ve left the Kiss CD backstage so they have to hum ‘All American Man’ together. Then they make their way to the stage.

A couple of huge Murderdolls logos adorn the stage and in an eruption of noise and energy, the Dolls take the stage and instantly kick off with ‘Dawn of The Dead’. Jordison in black leather Gestapo hat is jumping around stage left, Acey is wailing away stage right while Eric bangs away on the bass doing his best Nikki Sixx impression, while the Ghoul wrecks the trap kit. Wednesday is the last to take the stage and screaming, “We are the dead, coming for you!” And the crowd goes fucking wild.

The kids down the front, dressed up in full glam-goth regalia, know every word and sing along fervently with the band while among the throng watching from the side of stage are some of the biggest names in the Australian music industry. Members of bands like 28 days, Machine Gun Fellatio, Cog, Jimmy Eat World, Pre-Shrunk, and Sparta all stand wide eyed and mouths agape at the outrageous rock revisionism being unleashed onstage.

By the time the band have launched into ‘I (sic) Was a Teenage Zombie’, ‘Let’s Go To War’ and ‘Slit My Wrists (sic)’, the crows know what they’re in for. Most who have showed up for curiosity (sic) sake are still hanging around, but if anything the crowd is building and everyone looks like they are right into it having fun. The intro to ‘Twist My Sister’ is a kid’s nursery rhyme ‘Old McDonald’ which gets the whole crowd singing along.

Unbelievably, some lunatic in the crowd starts throwing bangers at the stage, but the fireworks only make it as far as the front row of fans before blowing up in their faces. Wednesday tries to get the guy to quit while geeing up the rest of the crowd. “All the people down the front tell the people at the back to ‘Die Die Die… my bride!’ he yells as the band grind into the song…

Today’s set includes two new songs, and we can report that both are killer kitsch rock rippers. The first, set for legendary status is called ‘The Devil Made Me Do It… And I’ll Do It Again’ while the second is the set closer, a crowd sing along gem ‘I Love to Say Fuck’. Wednesday grabs his big black umbrella, emblazoned with the word FUCK, Eric, Acey, and Joey are going crazy, jumping up and down in unison, Ghoul is all arms and legs behind the kit while Wednesday is right down in the crowd’s face urging them to stick their fingers in the air and yell ‘Fuck!’. It looks great to watch. “It isn’t choreographed,” says Wednesday later. “Everything’s pretty much spontaneous. There are some things like we all jump on an ascent in the music or whatever but everything else is stuff that just happens on stage.”

They (sic) crowd are almost passing out from the combination of frenzied activity and the extreme heat, but still manage to scream out for more as the band leave the stage. “A lot of people don’t know that’s what drives a show,” explains Wednesday about his relationship with the audience. “You have to make fans feel part of the event and I think we do it better than anyone else.”

The band then jump back into the van for the two minute trip back to their dressing room behind the main stage. When they get back there the guys are all super hyped up. Excitedly buzzing around their dressing room, drinking beers, telling jokes. Joey is busy analysing the gig, and the BDO circus in general. He and Wednesday have got an interview to do with Australian TV scheduled for 8:45pm. It’s almost 9pm and Joey has another issue: “I want to eat! I must eat before I talk!” he exclaims. The interview is postponed for 20 minutes.

Bass player Eric is hanging around, so I grab him for a quick chat. Of all the Murderdolls, Eric seems the shyest but is probably the one most up for anything, especially if it is party related. He may only be small, (even in his Ace Frehley six-inch platforms he’s still barely average height!) but he’s a true rock’n’roller with a party attitude to match. “‘Machine Gun Fellatio’ that’s a cool fuckin’ name,” he squeaks discussing some of the other bands on the BDO bill. And he does squeak, kinda, like annoying Brit ‘comedian’ Joe Pasquale.

I bring up the fact that esteemed record producer, Nick Launey (Silverchair, INXS) was side of stage watching the show and had an interesting story to tell me about Eric. “I think I know where this is going,” smiles Eric slyly. “I met him about two years ago in LA at a party and we were all fucked up. I got dragged down three flights of stairs by my hair and he reckoned it was the biggest rock’n’roll moment of ‘00 for him. First impressions count, man.”

“It was so rock’n’roll!” Launey informs me later. “It was the launch of Orgy’s album and they had these models dressed as prostitutes lying on a bed and Eric jumps up on the bed with them, which of course you weren’t allowed to do. So the bouncers are dragging him out by his hair, kicking and screaming, down the stairs. His head was literally bouncing down each stair like a cartoon character and all the while he’s just got his middle fingers up on each hand and is yelling out ‘Fuck You!’, ‘Get Fucked!’, ‘Fuck you, mind the hair!’ Somehow he got back into the party and I asked him ‘how’s your head?’ and he just said “Whaddya mean?” - it was just so rock’n’roll!”

Eric has pre-arranged with their tour driver to take him over to the Boiler Room, where the BDO’s electronica acts are playing. He wants to see German electronic innovators Kraftwerk. “One of the bands I was in before the Murderdolls was very digital and computer based,” he reveals. “Kraftwerk don’t do a lot of live shows and I don’t think I’ll ever get the opportunity to see them again. They’re pretty important to the genre and even if I catch just 10 minutes of their set I think it will be worth coming over. A short ride through the back entrance, we arrive at the Boiler Room and manage to get in, via a bit of a labyrinth, through the backdoor and into the main arena just at the side of the stage. The Kraftwerk guys are standing robot-like in front of their computers while the huge dome-like venue is dripping with sweat from the 10.000+ strong punters who have basically been locked in the room all day listening (sic) the dance bands. We get a good vantage point but after about five minutes we’re leaving. “Jeez! That was the most boring piece of crap I’ve seen!” exclaims Eric when he gets back to the dressing room. “But it was worth going because I scored some drugs!”

Acey’s just hanging around backstage with his camera and a little doll from The Nightmare Before Christmas. He has a ritual where he takes a photograph of the doll in front of landmarks all around the world. “I have him in front of the Eiffel Tower for instance,” he says. “The other day I took a pic of him in front of the Sydney Opera House.” And with that he takes a photo of the doll sitting in front of a sign that says ‘Sleazy’. Hmmm. Odd man.

Acey and Eric are loving every minute of the Murderdolls ride. They’re both on their first trip to Australia and according to both of them it is (sic) has been “Cool as hell!” “The Gold Coast was really on,” says Eric. “It’s been kinda mellow since we got to Sydney because we’ve had four or five days off before this show so we’ve just been trying to find out what’s been going on. It’s been building gradually… and we’ve been partying a lot – maybe too much,” he adds sheepishly. Rick the tour manager – who’s passing by – agrees: “Yep, they’ve been very naughty boys – they’ve got to go to bed early tonight with no supper,” he jokes.

“He knows we’re the most dangerous band on the tour,” counters Eric. It’s a fact that seems to deter any other bands partying with the Murderdolls too. “The only band that has even reached out to us are the guys in Jane’s Addiction, in particular, Dava Navarro,” offers Acey. “He actually came out of his way to come over and introduce himself. And pretty much comes up and talks to us everyday he sees us along with the drummer, Steven [Perkins]. Everyone else is just kinda like, ‘What’s Up?’ Maybe it’s because we don’t look like we’re the most approachable band. Then again no-one has done anything to piss us off at all.”

No one may be talking to the Murderdolls but there is talk of the Murderdolls all over BDO. Most centres around their appearance with most Australian musical luminaries agreeing the band are the best dressed at the festival. One member of Aussie band the Resin Dogs even goes as far as to say, “The Murderdolls rock the wardrobe”. Acey is kinda flattered but non-plussed by the comments. “What image?” he exclaims. “This is how we are all day! Obviously we knock it up a notch for the show but this is the real thing. We don’t care if people like us as sexual deviants or not, but one thing’s for sure – they’ll fucking remember us.”

Big Ben Graves strides over to join us at the table. “Did I hear the words sexual deviant?” he announces in his deeply rounded US accent. “I’ve always been like that! Some people have a devil on one shoulder and an angel on the other – I just two devils. There is NO voice of reason!”

We ask him if he has had any interesting adventures since he’s been in Australia and then instantly regret it…

“Dude, it has been nothing but interesting adventures. For instance last night, he (indicating Eric) he almost screwed a one-armed girl!”

“She had three tits and one arm,” giggles the dimunitive (sic) bassist.

“Yeah. It was weird,” continues the Ghoul, “one of her arms was like a stump and it looked like it had a nipple on it. I must admit I almost fucked her just for the freakiness of it.”

And with that starter for 10, the Ghoul is off. He starts ranting on with these sick freak jokes that crack everyone up and inside a minute you get a window to his personality. “Our drummer is one bona fide sick fuck,” jokes Wednesday of him later. “He stills (sic) freaks us out. I’ll just look at him sometimes and say to myself, ‘holy shit, dude, what planet are you from?’”

“It was weird on the Gold Coast,” says Eric, picking up on the tour adventure thread. “The girls there were the hottest chicks I had ever seen in my life but by the same token I had never got as much shit for the way I look than I have there as well. It was like two opposite poles. At first it was, ‘hey freak, where’s the funeral?’ and the next was, ‘sit down have a drink with us.”

“As far as people looking at you weird, I found Sydney is where I got the stares,” admits the Ghoul. “Sydney sucks! Although we did have some girls staking out our hotel which was pretty funny and I did have an over-zealous fan thrown out of the bar. The guy was just touching me a little more than he should and I didn’t like it,” he says animatedly. “I was like, ‘man, don’t make me waste this perfectly good bottle of Heineken by breaking it over your head. I’ve done it before’. Eric looks at him and says, “yeah he has!” But he was on something. I remember thinking ‘I want whatever he’s on… times ten!”

“I gotta say though, the Sydney crowd today was one of the best crowds we’ve had so far,” offers Acey as he joins the throng. “It was insane. It is good for us this tour, because the kids don’t know what we are all about yet so we have to prove ourselves. By the end of the set they all had their hands in the air.”

By this time Joey and Wednesday have finished their feed and their hastily re-scheduled interview and are looking for some more mischievous fun for themselves. “First of all, I’m going to go back over to the stage we played because there are a lot of kids hanging around over there still wanting to see us,” explains Joey. “Then after that, I’m gonna go directly where ever (sic) the free drinks are at…” Suddenly, Eric’s doubled over in the doorway of the dressing room. It’s been 45 minutes since he visited Kraftwerk in the Boiler Room and the pharmaceuticals are beginning to take effect. We ask if he’s OK. “Yeah man, I just think I’m gonna spew!” he grins. The rest of the band are baiting him ceaselessly.

“C’mon chuck it up man!” they urge and all crack up laughing together.

In the middle of all the commotion Wednesday is taking a piss in the corner of the dressing room. The place is a wreck: there are empty bottles of booze, food scrapes (sic), squashed fruit, hairdryers, make-up, boots, clothes (black and red if (sic) course) and of course a giant mirror. Wednesday is actually pissing into a bottle of Corona. At the same time I am just about to pick up my freshly opened bottle of Corona from the table which is besides (sic) a now suspicious looking bottle. “Yeah I always piss in the empty bottles,” giggles Wednesday. And then I leave ‘em on the table just to piss off anyone who might want to grab some of our rider or whatever. Just be careful just to get bottles from down there in the ice box, he laughs mischievously. Suddenly the oddly warm bottle in my hand seems less than appealing…

As the clock turns 1am the only people left at the stadium are the cleaners, the roadies and the still-partying Murderdolls. Last to leave, the van is parked just outside the dressing room and all I can see through the opened door is the Ghoul chucking around a baguette, now baked hard as a rock over the course of the stifling hot day. “Look at this - it could be used as a weapon to seriously maim you!” he screams bouncing the French loaf off the wall. A post vomit Eric cracks up, as the two hold a mock baguette joust oblivious to the outside world. They eventually make off back to their hotel room in the city, but don’t hang there for too long. The weekend lights of Sydney beckon and they cruise down William street in King’s Cross, to an underground rock venue called Club 77. It’s glam night, just their crowd and they spend the wee hours of the morning hanging out with fans and getting stuck into the sauce with a vengeance. Australia has officially been Murderdolled!

Blood and Glitter

Gavin Braddeley charts the rise of shock rock

Glam is hard evidence that what goes around comes around. Long dismissed as the definitive climax of 70s bad taste, in recent years glam rock has arisen from the grave, albeit with a veil of cobwebs draped over its original dusting of glitter. Originally a violent reaction to the 60s happy fad for all things natural, worthy, meaningful and drab, glam was all about being deliberately artificial, selfish, throwaway and garish.

In the States Alice Cooper was impaling baby dolls and throwing blood bottles around the stage from ‘70 onwards culminating in the vaudeville theatrics of the ‘Welcome To My Nightmare’ album/tour of ‘76.

Back in the UK, the Glam pioneer was lame pop pixie Marc Bolan (sic), photogenic frontman with T-Rex, who caused a sensation when he took to the stage on Top of the Pops in ‘71 with glitter under his eyes, clad in what looked suspiciously like drag. Never one to miss a trick, the lizard-like David Bowie soon jumped from the hippy ship to take on his otherworldly Ziggy Stardust persona.

The older generation may have thought that smearing make-up on your face and covering your clothes in sequins made you look like a ‘pooftah’. Alice Cooper got around this by replacing Glam’s overt ‘fagginess’ with ghoulish melodrama, prompting one critic to observe that Americans were more comfortable with necrophilia than homosexuality. And then came Kiss. Gene Simmons’ monstrous blood vomiting, fire breathing ‘Demon’ persona enslaved an entire generation of US children crossing Glam’s theatricality with heavy metal machismo to create one of the most influential bands in rock music history.

W.A.S.P. and Mötley Crüe supercharged Kiss’s sleaze and violence quotient to spectacular effect in the 80s, and provide the missing link between Glam and the Murderdolls, who happily cite the back-combed bad boys as a large part of their creative DNA. The chief inheritor of the Glam tradition in the last decade, however, is cross-dressing controversialist Marilyn Manson. Bowie may have metaphorically murdered his creation Ziggy Stardust in the summer of ‘74, while Bolan (sic) died more literally in a car accident three years later, but quarter-of-a-century on, Manson used his own dark arts to conjure their spirit on ‘Mechanical Animals’, his own tribute to pop’s most decadent decade.

Dead… and loving it!

The Murderdolls’ five favourite movie death scenes of all time…

The Murderdolls are proof positive that nothing gets some folks’ creative juices flowing quite so freely as a truly delicious cinematic death scene. Joey and Wednesday have a few favourites – both carnage connoisseurs identifying the ‘74 classic power toolfest The Texas Chainsaw Massacre as the gory cream of the crop – a movie currently being remade with a certain Mr. Manson in the soundtrack composer’s chair. (As a curious aside, you never actually see the girl hung on the hook – just a shadow – but such is the film’s sordid impact that most viewers swear you do!)

Joey 1. Texas Chainsaw Massacre “The girl on the hook.”

2. Friday The 13th Part IV “When the knife comes through the bed and impales the chick.”

3. The Exorcist “When the priest is hucked out through the plate glass window.”

4. A Nightmare on Elm Street “Where the girl is getting dragged across the rooftop.”

5. Necromancy “Where a group of devils and monsters take a girl apart.”

Wednesday 1. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre “The girl on the hook.”

2. Dawn of the Dead “When the spiked ball comes down and rips the guy’s head apart.”

3. Phantasm “A silver ball hits the guy in the head and sucks out all his brains.”

4. Hellraiser “Where (sic) the end sequence where the guy is being chased by all these hooks. They attach themselves to him and rip him apart.”

5. Nightmare On Elm Street “Where Freddy rips out the guy’s veins and uses them like strings controlling a puppet.”

Schlock n’ Roll

B-movie classics that have influenced shock rockers of now and then…

Some horror movies are best watched not so much with your tongue in your cheek, as thrust firmly through it, films that by accident or design are more about fun than fear. The same could be said of numerous horror loving bands, including the Murderdolls, where an ‘everyday is Halloween’ ethos prevails. Here are a few examples of B movie blood fests which may not have won any Oscars, have been paid tribute to by schlock loving bands over the years…

Plan 9 From Outer Space (1957) It is no surprise that the mother-of-all cult movies inspired the mother-of-all cult bands, and when Glenn Danzig created a label to release early Misfits material he dubbed it ‘Plan 9’. Frequently voted the worst movie of all time with its ludicrous script, mind bogglingly bad special effects, cardboard sets, and even more cardboard artistry, Plan 9 From Outer Space is irresistibly entertaining. Directed by the cross-dressing caliph of crap Ed Wood Junior, featuring proto-goth babe Vampira and Bela Lugosi (dying of drug addiction, he was replaced mid production by a stand-in who looks nothing like him).

The Abominable Dr Phibes (1971) Featuring horror cinema’s kind of camp Vincent Price as the fiendish Phibes, avenging the death of his wife using maniacal methods borrowed from the biblical plagues, all against wonderful, strangely psychedelic sets. Also possessed of a strange psychedelic sensibility are punk pioneers the Damned, though in the 80s, lead singer Dave Vanian’s horror sensibilities took centre stage, attracting a goth following. The 80 track ‘13th Floor Vendetta’ is a classic example of the band’s game-topping which, if you listen carefully, is all about ol’ Doc Phibes.

Mars Attacks! (1996) Director Tim Burton’s tribute to the drive-in shockers of the 50s and 60s, Mars Attacks! was actually based upon a ‘62 series of bubblegum cards, discontinued because of their gruesomely graphic pictures of earthlings being exterminated by alien invaders. As such this inspiration might suggest Mars Attacks! has little by way of plot, but for anyone with a weakness for vintage schlock sci-fi it’s a true Technicolor treat. This must certainly include the Misfits and when they reformed, they did so without the blessing of founder Glenn Danzig, but with their monster movie obsessions intact – among a multitude of horror movie tributes on their ‘97 comeback album ‘American Psycho’ was ‘Mars Attacks’ (and even an instrumental coincidentally titled ‘Abominable Dr Phibes’!)

I Was A Teenage Werewolf (1957) The drive-in movies of the 50s and 60s typically featured juvenile delinquents or monsters, and this bargain-basement effort delivered both in one lurid package. Before becoming ‘Pa’ on TV’s Little House on the Prairie Michael Landon stars as a troubled teen – though when he starts growing hair in strange places, it’s more than just hormones to blame. A howl from beginning to end, Teenage inspired a number on ‘Songs the Lord Taught Us’, the ‘80 debut from drive-in movie loving ghoulish rockers The Cramps.

Murder, mayhem and a right old mess

Minging Murderdoll tales from the Big Day Out

Who is the messiest Murderdoll of them all? Wednesday: “That would be Eric and The Ghoul. They are just messy as fuck. But you know you’ve just got to get used to living with these people. We’ve been on the road since July. You live on a bus for six weeks which means you’ve got (sic) live in everyone else’s shit.”

Who is the tidy anal doll? Joey: “No-one. We’re all pretty fuckin’ messy.” Wednesday: “I just took two garbage bags of mess out of my room. And just put it in the hallway. Just full of chicken bones and beer bottles and all sorts of shit like that, it was just smelling really bad so I had to get rid of it.”

So you do that yourself? Wednesday: “I don’t let the cleaning staff come into my room and tidy up. I put the ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign for the whole week I am there.” Joey: “The housekeepers are scared shitless to come into our rooms anyway so we keep it easy for them and put the ‘Do Not Disturb” signs up the whole time. They are going to be so scared to come into our rooms and clean up after we’ve been there for a fuckin’ week!”

#metal hammer april 03 #interview #murderdolls #wednesday 13 #joey jordison #ben graves #eric griffin #acey slade #this thing is fucking 5500 words jesus christ

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