#showboat fox

[plenty-o-sunshine-stims]

🎊🚢Splash Mountain: Doo-Dah Landing🎊🚢

My oh my, what a wonderful day! Such a vibrant and happy scene.

[revolant]

See the thing is I watched the first episode of this when it first came out but just that made me so unwell that it’s taken me this long to watch ep 2 and. I don’t know what I expected

[jtl-fics]

Goof Wednesday can I request some New Kings?

11/6/24 WIP Wednesday (CLOSED) | New Kings AU

He doesn’t pay much attention to the crowd cheering King this time, he does look to see Kevin taking in the sight of Riko and there’s a sadness there instead of fear this time. Neil watches as Riko showboats again, taking in the crowd’s adoration like a sunflower soaks up sunlight. 

Neil himself is a bit mystified to see… a young man.

He’d seen photos of Riko, perfectly posed and with lighting that made him imposing and larger than life for far longer than he got to see Riko alive and moving as a human being. Looking at him now from the eyes of someone who had hit his 40s before a bus crash had sent him back here?

He’s young.

It isn’t an excuse for anything that he’s done or will do even if Neil and the rest of the Foxes have done their best to defang him… but he’s so much younger than Neil remembers.

[unabashedly-so]

🌹SDV Elliott HC 💃

Content warning: Americanized contexts ahead. 😅 Not pigeonholing SDV as American but I'm using Americanized regionalisms because that's the language I have to communicate I'm trying to portray. 🤷‍♀️

************

It takes a high heart level and a moderate intoxication level to bring it out, BUT Elliott has had years of ballroom dance under his belt.

I'm imagining a southern old-money style upbringing for him (subject to change) and he started being trained in different dances bc he was involved in whatever the male version of debutantes is.

he wasn't big into it at the time but yknow mommy issues he was a diligent well-mannered young man so he learned enough to pass by.

enter university and Prince Slut (freshman year) is finding all kinds of ways to get the tender physical touch and affection he craved as a child make friends and finds the uni's ballroom dance club

his foundation of skill and reputation make him insanely popular within the club so it becomes a genuinely healthy outlet for him.

he never takes it seriously in terms of competition; he's just there to have fun and make his partner shine but you KNOW he's flaunting and flexing along the way, like executing daring moves with his partner, showboating, getting so overly sultry with it, etc.

he gets so many numbers and so much ass whenever he goes out, it's upsetting.

anyway tl;dr he spends so much time on that and other social activities in college that he barely passes most of his classes and it's actually a huge regret of his but that's a whole 'nother post

he stops dancing after uni for the most part as he has to reprioritize his life

but that doesn't mean that he lets it go, oh no.

get enough drinks in this man and enough room to move and he's 10years younger ready to sweep anyone off their feet.

He'll trot with the foxes, swing from one coast to another, cha-cha real smooth, give him tequila and he'll give you salsa, etc etc

of fucking course he can waltz but like 1) ya Basic, and 2) dinner and a movie first (and let's make it Viennese, for the love of Yoba)

he'd much rather rumba or tango tbh but only with someone he really cares about. poor boy'll catch feelings quick rocking hips like that.

which like. alternate ending to the 6heart scene has him inviting you to dance with him to blow off some steam. nothing too stilted or sensual, just an easy swing or something so he can move and move you and maybe even give you a twirl if you're so inclined 😉

(at 8hearts and above he's twirling you, dipping you, and rocking you on his hips during wrap-ins 🥴🥴 you've also unlocked private rumba, tango, and waltzes with him, and boy is it getting humid in this seaside cabin 🥵🥵)

it does take getting him at least buzzed to bring it out, but he has no shame once it's out, so it's like an open secret in Pelican town that he'll show anyone who's a good sport a good time

EXCEPT.

(and this is a big one)

he's so fucking judgey about what music people choose to dance to.

full on Big Sassy Gay energy.

"oh you want to slow dance to [Ed Sheeran]? yeah I remember being in middle school too."

"*Thinking Out Loud playing* is this the wedding song where people teeter back and forth like two rickety sideways rocking chairs with room for Yoba in between because your grandma's watching for three straight minutes? ...no yeah it's fine. I mean to their credit it probably functions as their run through for the consummation later too so good for them I guess"

*I Won't Give Up playing* "if you need to dance to a song where someone else declares how you're So Definitely going to be together forever, I'm sorry but I give it two years tops." "Elliott, this was Haley and Alex's song." "I said what I said. Next."

"*dramatic sigh* just because you can mathematically fit a 5 step into a 4/4 doesn't mean you can or should turn any bubblegum pop song about casual sex into a tango. It's NOT about sensuality, it's about THE CONFLICT THEREIN."

just take him home at this point. 😅 no one understands what he's saying but they know it's probably insulting.

anyway fast forward to domestic bliss and he's regularly pulling you in to show you how happy you make him

he's definitely singing any lines he thinks fit you under his breath while he dances with you. He'll bring you in close and murmur them into your ear or kiss them into your neck if he's got bedroom thoughts. 🌹

[lensman-arms-race]

Got some questions, so for Ttvman 2, 4,5, and 6.

And for all titans 9.

hope that you have a wonderful day/night!

2. A canon or headcanon hill I will die on

I refuse to call them 'Cinemaman' even though it's a popular fan name. A cinema uses a projector and a backdrop instead of an electronic screen. A projector isn't a TV. You might as well call TSpeaker 'megaphone man' or TCam 'telescope man'. Similar tech but not interchangeable words!

4. Favorite line

It's gotta be 'no stabbing' in episode 67! I mentioned before that I love how it diffuses the tension between TTv and TSpeaker by making it clear that TTv doesn't hate them.

Also I gotta give a shoutout to 'you are so dead' in episode 47, because the fan wiki says it's 'you are so dead' but I can't hear it as anything other than 'you are so bad', which is funny to me. You know when you're so angry that your brain can't even come up with good/normal insults, so you say something rubbish like 'you're... nothing but a... sly old fox'? TTv was probably thinking something like 'Fuck you sideways you absolute punk bastard' but was too angry to articulate anything other than 'you're BAD'. Haha!

5. Best personality trait

Rizz

The way they dispatch enemies both elegantly and with maximum efficiency. Like, they do showboat, but they don't waste time.

I'd love to see more of the Titans' personalities outside battle. DFB, please let's see them chilling for a while after they wrap up the current arc.

6. Worst personality trait

This probably applies somewhat to all 3 Titans, but they can be overconfident. TTv could probably have killed G-Toilet back in episode 47 if they'd been a bit more aware of their surroundings (the buzzsaw toilet and the possessed TSpeaker). They even say 'pathetic trap' when they first teleport in. If they'd been a bit more cautious and less dismissive of the trap, things could have gone down very differently.

9. Scene that first made me love (or hate) the character

Titan Camera: In episode 57 when they shrug off everything the skibidis throw at them and fly around with their jet wings. That made me think 'this character's cool as hell!' and made me wish for a wing-y jetpack like theirs.

Titan Speaker: In episode 26 when they flushed the giant toilet then immediately sat on it. Super funny!

Titan TV: Their debut episode when they wreck some skibidi shit then go:

:3

I remember I actually laughed out loud at that point!

---

(All answers from the question list)

(Original post with list of questions)

[fettesans]

Top, screen capture from Longlegs, directed by Osgood Perkins, 2024. Via. Bottom, 1986 Black Flag promotional poster by Raymond Pettibon. Courtesy of Rago Wright. Via.

--

(Andres) Serrano has said, “I wanted to paint a portrait of Donald Trump using his own brushes … Ever since the ’80s, Donald Trump has been associating himself with a particular vision of American success … that paints him as all-American.” To this end, Serrano purchased Trump-related items for seven hours a day since April 7, 2018. “I make art about very basic things,” he says. “Life, death, sex, religion, excrement … it’s only natural that it’s now Trump.” To anyone offended that Serrano’s “portrait” is not an obvious piece of anti-Trump agitprop, the artist says, “I’ve seen a lot of artwork that’s anti-Trump, and frankly it’s not good.” He’s right.

His show is much more interesting. Game isn’t about chain-saw politics and propaganda. Instead, it employs the most polarizing figure in the Western world — perhaps in American history — to create two different exhibitions in one. Trump supporters, happy-talking Fox News conspiracy theorists, Vichy Republicans in Congress, wealthy beneficiaries of recent Republican tax breaks, and the red-meat base will look at this show and say, “This is who we are! Isn’t it great?” The remaining (approximately 60 percent) of this country, including those of us who see all things MAGA as representing America as a failed state run by minority rule resulting in a reign of domestic terror that traffics in malicious viciousness, spectacle, graft, xenophobia, nationalism at its most dangerous, and common scumbaggery, will look at this show and say, “This is who we are! This is tragic.”

By “us,” Serrano means America’s 40-year fascination with and fixation on this brash bombastic, obviously unscrupulous, and brutal self-branded avatar of American celebrity and success. To feed the fires, he made himself forever available to the press, and the press fed on him. In turn, he fed on it and our inability to ever look away — happy to cast him as “our” cartoon modern P. T. Barnum of unleashed American id, ambition, bluster, and showboating. Over that time, Trump became inexorably entwined with America’s national consciousness and grew stronger. And more visible, becoming a TV star. By the time he rode down the escalator of Trump Tower and before beginning his thinly veiled white-nationalist immigrant-hating campaign, he had 100 percent name-recognition. Indeed, for that next year, no one could look away when this celebrity hot dog was on TV, pompous but totally comfortable in himself, spouting whatever he needed to say to woo the rubes. When he first announced his candidacy, many progressives saw Trump’s blustering rage as a path to a 50-state presidential victory and the final elimination of Republican conservatism as it had evolved in the 21st century. Our old racist Uncle Trump at the end of the American bar would lose so decisively that the long arc of justice would finally cut the head off this part of the long American night. We could finally go high when they went low.

Jerry Saltz, from For Decades, We All Ate Trump Up. Artist Andres Serrano Asks, ‘Why?’, for Vulture, April 22, 2019.

[synergysilhouette]

"Wolverine & the X-Men" wasn't as good as I remember...

Lemme just start off and say: I love the concept of the X-Men preventing future disasters, as well as the voice cast–wasn’t really thrilled with how most of the group wore blue and gold uniforms instead of more unique looks (like Emma, Angel, and Nightcrawler), but I can overlook that.

That said, I was kinda confused about why they knew some characters but didn’t know others, ie never meeting Gambit or Mystique. It was weird; at first I thought we knew everyone because it was made for people who were familiar with the comics and thus no explanations were necessary, but we still had major characters they never dealt with before.

Then there’s the issue that the title is SUPER accurate; it’s the Wolverine show. Unlike Evolution and The Animated Series, it doesn’t feel like everyone is equal:

Forge, Kitty, and Bobby are kind of just…there. While they help in a practical sense (Forge repairing the Blackbird and Shadowcat and Iceman being part of the action), they don’t really have any development of their own or major screentime.

Beast’s major role was to find out what destroyed the mansion, but Emma and Cyclops found out themselves–by ACCIDENT, I might add.

Storm and Angel each got one episode to star in before Storm had limited lines and Angel never spoke again. Their romance was wasted, too.

Nightcrawler and Rogue get about 3 episodes focused on them over the season, and afterwards they kind of fade to the background in terms of story. There’s no feeling of friendship between them and the other members, be it reminiscing or hanging out.

Emma was important in finding Charles, but wasn’t really important again until the end of the season.

They went the stereotypical route and made Cyclops Jean-obsessed. Not even his friends could get him out of his funk.

Every filler episode was about Wolverine.

Some guys would have big upper bodies but small lower bodies. Very weird design choice.

Altogether, I like the plot, but not the showboating. I will attribute that to the Fox films, though. At least XMTAS and XME made the characters feel unique and equal to each other (in a character sense).

[alanalfordsportstalkshow]

Arlington Renegades Week 7 vs Memphis Showboats Press Conference

Congrats on the Win! Thank you, UFL Arlington Renegades for providing the Alan Alford Sports Talk Show the Press Conference for the Renegades vs Memphis Showboats.   I tremendously appreciate you all! 💯🏈🙏🏽🎙️🙂 Up next is the San Antonio Brahmas this Sunday at 3:00 PM CT / 4:00 PM EST at The Alamodome. FOX | FOX Sports on SiriusXM **All Stats below provided by the UFL** RENEGADES ROCK SHOWBOATS, 47-23 The 47-point output by the Renegades marks the most points scored in franchise history, dating back to the 2020 XFL season. The Renegades scored 25 first-half points, their most in a half this season. Arlington out-rushed an opponent for the first time this season, 106-96. The two interceptions gives Arlington seven on the season, putting them in first place in the league. Four takeaways in the game set a season-high for the Renegades defense. QB Luis Perez threw for 296 yards and three TDs (season-high) on 27-of-32 passing for a passer rating of 193. Perez now has a league-leading 1,626 pass yards on the season. RB De’Veon Smith had a two-touchdown day, giving him three on the season. He finished with 14 carries for 101 yards, his first 100-yard game of the season, in addition to five receptions for 35 yards. TE Sal Cannella has now scored TDs in back-to-back weeks and has three on the season. He finished with 9 catches for 72 yards and two scores. WR JaVonta Payton had a two-score day and has now scored a TD in three straight games. He has five total touchdowns (four receiving and one rushing) on the season and finished the day with 4 catches for 82 yards. Arlington’s defense posted 4 total sacks on the day: LBs Will Clarke (1.5), Vic Beasley and Donald Payne (1), and Anree Saint-Amour (0.5). CB Ajene Harris had eight total tackles (tied game-high and led team). #alanalford #alanalfordsportstalkshow #UFL #NFL #XFL #USFL #football #texas #arlington #arlingtonrenegades #sports #fox

[ilopisara]

17.11. 23:04 | Ilo Pisara vs Meisselit 6 - 3

Oh, what a spectacle of mediocrity with the occasional spark of accidental brilliance! Ilo Pisara, my so-called warriors on ice, you managed to outscore Meisselit 6-3. But let's be honest: if they had any aim whatsoever, those eight shots could have spelled our doom. Teppo Winnipeg - Defenseman? More like "offense-only-man" with that dismal 40.00 defensive rating. Your passing was as unpredictable as Wi-Fi in a hurricane – decent job on assists but try not blocking shots with your face next time. Yuri Tarde – Goalie or Swiss cheese impersonator? A save percentage of only 0.62; you couldn't catch a cold in an igloo! Let’s hope you were just giving the fans behind you some souvenirs because letting in three goals isn’t exactly stellar work. Macho Fantastico – The name says it all doesn’t it? Sure, six points is impressive until we realize it’s probably compensating for something... like defense perhaps? And Jani Saari - You’re lucky scoring distracts everyone from your lackluster faceoff performance and hoarding the puck longer than a dragon sits on gold! Now listen up: past victories are about as useful as dehydrated water—irrelevant once the new game starts. Remember Kaljajengi (3-0) and Wild Foxes (10-4)? That’s where we set standards higher than Macho's ego! Stay sharp—I expect less showboating and more teamwork because frankly, I've seen better coordination between toddlers at feeding time. Shape up before our luck runs thinner than Yuri's goaltending repertoire!

[watch-all-sports]

USFL Week 6 top plays: Houston Gamblers lead New Jersey Generals

There are some great matchups on the schedule in Week 6 of the USFL, and we’ve got you covered with all the action from a Sunday slate that includes a pair of contests. The Philadelphia Stars (3-3) began the day by defeating the New Orleans Breakers (4-2), 16-10. Soon, the New Jersey Generals (2-3) will do battle with the Houston Gamblers (3-2) on FOX. Yesterday, the Memphis Showboats (3-3)…

[trendingnewsbite]

USFL Week 6 top plays: New Jersey Generals vs. Houston Gamblers

There are some great matchups on the schedule in Week 6 of the USFL, and we’ve got you covered with all the action from a Sunday slate that includes a pair of contests. The Philadelphia Stars (3-3) began the day by defeating the New Orleans Breakers (4-2), 16-10. Soon, the New Jersey Generals (2-3) will do battle with the Houston Gamblers (3-2) on FOX. Yesterday, the Memphis Showboats (3-3)…

[seeyeps]

How To Watch Usfl 2023, Kickoff Weekend

To watch USFL 2023, kickoff weekend, you will need to purchase a ticket. You can buy tickets from the USFL website or from a ticket reseller such as StubHub or SeatGeek. Once you have your ticket, you will need to find out which stadium is hosting the kickoff event for that particular season.

You can access this information on the USFL website. On game day, make sure to arrive early so that you are able to get into the stadium and find your seat before kick-off time. Some stadiums may require you to pass through security checks before being allowed entry into the stadium grounds or even just outside of it; be sure to factor this in when planning your arrival time at the venue.

Enjoy!

Purchase a Usfl 2023 Kickoff Weekend ticket: Before you can watch the Kickoff Weekend games, you'll need to purchase tickets for each game that you want to watch

Tickets are available through the official Usfl website or through third-party resellers such as StubHub and Ticketmaster

Select your preferred venue: The Usfl has multiple venues located in different cities across the country where kickoff weekend will be held

Decide on which venue is best suited for your needs, whether it’s close proximity or seating availability, then purchase tickets based on that choice

Plan Your Trip: If necessary, plan out a trip if the chosen venue is far away from home and make sure to book accommodations if needed

4 Watch The Games: When it comes time for kickoff weekend, attend each of the games and enjoy watching all of the great football action!

How Can I Watch Usfl 2023?

The USFL 2023 season is just around the corner and fans are wondering how to watch. The most obvious way for viewers in the United States to catch all of the action is via NBC, CBS, ABC or FOX who have exclusive broadcast rights for USFL matches. Streaming services such as FuboTV, Sling TV and AT&T Now also offer access to these networks so that subscribers can watch every game on their computer or mobile device.

Additionally, ESPN+ will be streaming a selection of games throughout the season while Amazon Prime Video will show select matchups on Thursday nights. For those looking to stay up-to-date with scores, schedules and highlights there are many apps available including Scoreboard2023 which provides real-time updates from around the league. Finally, if you’re stuck at home but still want to take part in some of the excitement then you can always tune into one (or more) of the numerous fan forums available online where discussion about each team’s performances are lively!

What are the Current Usfl Standings?

The current United States Football League standings are as follows: The San Antonio Marshalls lead the pack with a record of 7-0, followed by the Las Vegas Gamblers at 6-1. The Orlando Renegades and New York Marauders both have 5-2 records, while the Arizona Outlaws and Dallas Demons are tied for fourth place with 4-3 records. In fifth place is the Charlotte Generals (2-5), sixth is the Birmingham Stallions (1-6) and seventh is the Atlanta Empire (0-7).

With seven games left in regular season play, it's anyone's guess who will make it to playoffs this year!

What are the Teams in the Usfl?

The United States Football League (USFL) was a professional American football league that operated for three seasons, 1983 through 1985. The USFL comprised twelve teams in two conferences divided into four divisions: the Eastern and Western Conferences each had two divisions while the Central Conference had one. The Eastern Conference featured the Baltimore Stars, Birmingham Stallions, Jacksonville Bulls and New Jersey Generals; the Western Conference included Arizona Wranglers, Denver Gold, Houston Gamblers, Los Angeles Express and Oakland Invaders; while Memphis Showboats were part of the Central Division.

Each team played 18 regular season games over a 20-week period with 12 teams making it to the playoffs at the end of each season. The USFL's inaugural championship game took place on July 17th 1984 with Jim Kelly leading his team -the Buffalo Bills- to victory against Tampa Bay Bandits by 28–24 in front of almost 41 thousand fans at Giants Stadium in East Rutherford Nj. Despite this success during its three years of operation it never made it past 1986 as financial troubles forced many owners to drop out or move their franchises elsewhere leaving only five teams remaining when all was said and done.

Usfl 2023 Schedule

The USFL 2023 Schedule has been announced, and it promises to be an exciting season! The schedule features 14 games for each of the eight teams, with a two-week break in between. Teams will play each other within their division twice, as well as playing one game against every team from the opposite division.

Additionally, two weeks of playoffs will decide the champion at the end of the season. Be sure to mark your calendars for this upcoming season – USFL 2023 is sure to be full of excitement and drama!

Usfl 2023 Tickets

Tickets for the USFL 2023 season are now available! Fans of this new up-and-coming league can get their tickets early and be among the first to experience it. With teams in cities across America, fans have plenty of opportunities to catch a game in person.

Get your tickets today and be part of the action when the USFL kicks off its inaugural season next year!

Where to Watch Usfl 2023

The upcoming USFL 2023 season is sure to be an exciting one, and the best way to make sure you don't miss a single minute of the action is by tuning in to watch your favorite teams battle it out. Whether you're streaming on ESPN+, Fox Sports Go, or listening on SiriusXM Radio, there are plenty of options available for viewers looking to stay up-to-date with all the action. Plus, if you prefer watching games live in person then check out ticket options from your local team's website–you won't want to miss this incredible season!

Where is the Usfl Playing in 2023

The USFL is set to relaunch in spring of 2023, with eight teams playing a 10-game regular season schedule and four teams participating in the postseason. The league plans to play its games primarily on Saturdays, but may explore additional midweek opportunities as well. While locations for the stadiums have yet to be announced, they are expected to be primarily located along the eastern seaboard of the United States.

Usfl Schedule

The United States Football League (USFL) recently released their 2021 schedule, with games beginning on April 17 and running through August 14. The USFL will feature an East-West format, as teams from both coasts will compete for the championship title. Fans can look forward to some exciting matchups this season between teams such as the New York Guardians, Tampa Bay Vipers, Los Angeles Wildcats, Houston Roughnecks and more!

With a full slate of regular season games plus two playoff weeks included in the schedule, there are sure to be plenty of opportunities to catch all the action.

Usfl Teams

The United States Football League (USFL) was a professional American football league that played three seasons, 1983–1985. The USFL had teams in twenty-one cities across the United States and featured some of the most talented players in the game at the time including Herschel Walker, Steve Young, Jim Kelly, Reggie White, Doug Flutie and others. Despite its short life span, the USFL is remembered fondly by many fans for its innovative approach to pro football with an exciting brand of wide open offense and dynamic special teams play.

Xfl Schedule

The XFL released its 2020 season schedule, with the first game kicking off on February 8th. The eight-team league will play a 10-game regular season leading up to a championship game on April 26th. Each team will play five home games and five away games, culminating in the XFL Championship Game at TDECU Stadium in Houston, TX.

This exciting new schedule promises great football action throughout the year - make sure you don't miss any of it!

Conclusion

Overall, USFL 2023 Kickoff Weekend is sure to be an exciting event. With some of the best teams in professional football competing against each other, fans won't want to miss out on any of the action. Whether you're attending a game in person or watching from home, make sure to tune into all the games and cheer your favorite team on!

[deejadabbles]

Brooooo!

As soon as I get home I'm making a fake add with all those stage names cos I love them so much 🤣 I'm also adding HardOn Hardcase and Explicit Echo to the list lol

Kix just strikes me as the type who'd make a point to show up the showboaters like Fives, but prove he can do it subtly, with style lol

Omg!!! Okay, you just gave me an idea to put in part two, it'll be a way to appease the Jesse lovers since his dance got interrupted. Just....don't blame me if his use of whipped cream kills you 🤣

So, currently my plan is to do a part two for this (focusing on Echo, Tup, and Hardcase) and maaaaaybe a bonus chapter with Dogma, since I don't wanna leave him out (I just have to find a way to write it where I'm not cracking up at the meer imagine of that man taking the stick out long enough to do a striptease lmao). But then, I'm gonna go full crack, and make an AU where Rex, Cody, Fox, Wolffe, Mayday, and Bly run a strip show, that way I can go all out with their costumes and acts lol

Five-Oh-Thirst (501st x Fem!Reader) Part One

Summary: One little comment sends the night spiraling into hilarious, shameless territory as the boys show you their best lap dances.

A.N. IDK, man, I just really want the 501st boys to be exotic dancers and I figured I'd share that! Please don't take this seriously, it's just for fun and debauchery <3 Also, I highly recommend listening to the songs I link as you read! Enhances the ~experience~

Word Count: 3,174

Warnings: 18+ (minors DNI), drinking, the boys being way too hot and thirsty for you, lap dances, and general debauchery

It all started with a little holo ad flickering in the corner of the drink menu.

You were with your boys, enjoying some shore leave celebrations at 79s, as was the tradition when returning to Coruscant, but one little comment sent the night spiraling into hilarious, shameless territory.

"Ooo, what's the chances that we'll still be on shore leave next week?" you had asked the table, and when Jesse asked why you waved the ad at him with a grin, "Because they're having a Thunder Star act here next week."

"A what?" Echo squinted at the picture, then let his eyes go wide at the shot of a topless, ab-bearing twi'lek.

"Thunder Star, they're a popular company of exotic male dancers. Looks like 79s’ trying something new."

" 'Exotic male dancers'?" Hardcase smirked, "You mean strippers."

You shrugged, "I prefer to give the profession a little more dignity than that, but, yes."

Fives' glass thudded against the table as he set it down, then snatched the menu out of your hand, "Whoever owns this place is throwing away their money," he leaned back with a smug grin, "I mean, who'd need to hire male dancers when aaaallll this is right here already?" he crooned, running his hands up and down his chest.

That earned a round of laughter.

"What?" he demanded, "It's true! We'd make better entertainment than these clowns."

Jesse was still laughing as he said, "Maybe we should ask the bartender to hire us instead."

"We'd need a group name for that," Kix chimed in, smiling into his drink, "and I don't think the General would approve of a stripper group calling themselves the Five-Oh-First."

"Oh! Oh!" you waved your hand excitedly, "You could call yourselves the Five-Oh-Thirst!"

An even louder roar of laughter at that, Jesse and Hardcase even thudding their fists on the table.

"Perfect!" Hardcase elbowed a chuckling Echo in the side, "Echo, quick, write that down!"

"Although..." you hummed, tapping your chin. It was always so easy to tease the boys, and you took every chance you could. "You guys need a lot more than a clever name to compete with Thunder Star."

"Oh yeah?" Fives leaned in over the table to give you his attention, "Like what?"

You pointed the fruit garnish of your drink at him for emphasis, "Talent." After popping the fruit into your mouth, realizing the rest of them were grinning and leaning in as well, you went on. "Dancing like that takes skill, boys. You can't just shake your ass a little and call it a day."

"That sounds like a challenge, sweetheart," Fives all but purred.

The fruit caught in your throat, "Wh-what?" you coughed.

His smile was wide as he scooted out of the booth, "I'll give you a show you won't forget," he answered with a wink.

The others began whistling and catcalling as he sauntered over to your end of the crescent-shaped booth. Your face was instantly hot at the way he was locking eyes with you, especially when he motioned for you to turn to the end of the seat.

"Come on, mesh'la" he urged, "I need a lap if I'm gonna give you a lap dance."

Beside you, Hardcase was egging Fives on and you heard Jesse say something about music as he grabbed Echo's datapad that had been sitting on the table. Finally, you were over the shock of what was happening and, maybe it was the alcohol buzzing through your body, but some flirtatious confidence rose up in your chest.

You turned to Fives fully, and patted your lap, "Alright, do your worst."

With that, the datapad speakers started blaring music which made Fives clap his hands, "Perfect! Oh, sweetheart, you're in for a treat."

He started the dance by trailing his hands down his chest again, slow this time, keeping his eyes locked on yours. Then he was on you. He framed your knees with his, hovering over your thighs as he started rolling his hips side to side.

Those hands moved over said hips, until they rested on his thighs, drawing your attention just where he wanted. That's when he bent his knees, placing his ass on your lap just as he started moving his hips back and forth.

His smug grin was wide as he mouthed the lyrics of the song, now tucking those hands behind his head and bouncing his chest to the beat of the music. The motion made you jolt despite yourself, and you had to resist the urge to grind up into his tempting ass.

Fives obviously noticed the way you gulped at the sight of him, because his tongue darted out to lick his lips. It was all you could do to suppress a gasp, especially when he shifted his stance, moving back to slot his leg between yours. 

With his eyes on yours, he leaned in close, breath hot on your ear as he said, “Damn, mesh’la,” then, again in time with the lyrics, “the things I would do to you.”

You did gasp that time, and he nipped your ear as his reward, before spreading your legs with his. The others were whistling and cheering as he put his hand on your thighs and sank to his knees. Again he made a show of licking his lips as he raked his eyes over you, admiring, and not hiding any of his dirty thoughts. And of course, as he got back to his feet, he flashed you another wink.

Then, with grace you weren’t expecting from an ARC trooper, he hopped onto the booth seat, planting his feet on either side of you so you had the perfect view of his codpiece as he gyrated his hips to the beat.

The others went crazy at that, shouting and banging their glasses all while Fives thrust dangerously close to your flushed face. His fingers came down to stroke your hair and, for just a moment, you thought he would pull you against him, but he only teased the vulgar act as he ground his crotch closer and closer to you. 

Fives didn’t stay there long, though, instead, he hopped back down to the ground, grabbed your hand, and hoisted you up.

A delighted squeal left you as he lifted you into those strong arms, wrapping your legs around his waist. He spun you around, this time actually singing the song all while bouncing you up and down with the rolling motions of his hips.

At the table, the boys sang along too, treating ‘Ride it, my pony!’ like a battle cry as Fives enjoyed the feeling of you against him. You were breathless from your hysterical giggles while he danced, and trying to ignore how much heat was traveling south with every thrust against your body.

Fives swayed you back towards the booth and, with your legs still clamped around his hips, he laid you on the table, somehow avoiding everyone’s drinks as the song finished its last repetitive set of lyrics.

Everyone was clapping and cheering as you covered your hot face with your hands, lungs pleading for air since you were still breathless from laughter. Fives was laughing too, just basking in the playful air as he put his hands on either side of your head to brace himself.

“So, convinced, mesh’la?” he chuckled.

When all you did was continue to hide behind your hands, someone reached out and tugged lightly on your wrist, “Oh come on, sweetheart, don’t be shy now!”

Somehow, you managed to take a few gasping breaths into your chest and peek out at him between your fingers, “Okay, maybe you could make it as a professional.”

Fives and several others roared with laughter, “Maybe? After all that, I just get a maybe? You’re breaking my heart, cyare!”

“Well obviously,” said another voice, Kix, as he stepped up and put his hand on his brother’s shoulder to pull him away. Something was gleaming in his eyes as he looked between you two. “You didn’t listen, Fives, she already said you have to do more than shake your ass and grind.”

Intrigued, Fives stepped back, letting your legs fall from him as Kix stepped in front of you instead. He winked, eyes never leaving yours when he reached out and took your hand.

“You have to seduce the woman you’re giving attention to, brother,” he purred.

A chorus of “Oooooos” rose from the booth as Kix pulled you gently up from the table, still eyeing you as he took a few steps back. He must have set his plan into motion before he challenged Fives, because there was now a lone chair pulled up.

That’s when Kix pulled you closer, lips actually daring to hover near yours as he whispered, “Take a seat, gorgeous.”

Well, any air you had managed to pull in before was swiftly gone again. You were glad he was asking you to sit since you suddenly felt very weak in the knees. Kix stood before you, eyes half-lidded as he looked down, gaze sweeping over your lips before he gave a quick nod to Jesse.

Again, Kix must have had a whole plan, because Jesse pressed play on a new song, and you knew you were in for something very different.

Kix didn’t jump in head first, instead, he started slow. His eyes ran up and down your body as he moved a thumb over his lips, teasing, thinking. Then, when your own gaze started to wander down his body, he took that same hand and tapped your chin.

“Eyes on mine, mesh’la.”

And when you obeyed, finally, he touched you. Starting by brushing his knuckles across your cheek as the sensual song played on. Then a finger trailed down your neck, giving just the briefest of attention to your chest before venturing down your arm.

“Beautiful,” he whispered, reverently, as he took your hand again. This time, he placed it just above his belt, laying your palm flat against his toned, hard stomach. “It’s okay, you can touch me all you want, cyare.”

With that and his gentle hold on your wrist, he moved your hand up, letting you feel every bit of his muscular chest under his blacks. All while keeping his bedroom eyes on yours. He didn’t stop at his chest, though, and kept guiding your touch to run across his throat, until he finally cupped your hand over his cheek.

Only then did he break eye contact, just so his eyelids could flutter closed as he leaned into your touch. Your chest was so warm at such a simple act, the look on Kix’s face one of pure adoration, as if your hand on his skin was all he needed. 

Then his lips kissed your palm and he finally released your hand as the song’s beat picked up. That’s when he got on his knees before you. Kix places his hands on your thighs, letting out an admiring hum as he gave them a gentle, almost possessive squeeze. He was determined to spread them open too, but, like everything else, he took his time instead of coming in hot.

His hands crept upwards and as they did, very, very subtly, he pushed your legs apart. When his fingers were just on the precipice of your core, his eyes snapped back to yours.

That’s when he pounced. Kix hooked his arms under your knees as he stood, leaving you to slide down the chair into a very vulnerable and exposed position, your ass pressing into his pelvis. He smiled down at you while shrugging your legs onto his shoulders for more comfort, all knowing and smug just like his brother.

Kix stayed with the music, though, and when he took advantage of the suggestive position, it wasn’t Fives’ fast, enthusiastic trusting. The medic rolled his whole body into the motion, slow, deliberate, and letting his action sink into you as his hips met yours. His thrusts were deep and he only pulled back for another one when the beat allowed for it.

Somewhere, probably in another life where Kix wasn’t gazing at you like a goddess, someone said, “Why does this feel even dirtier than Fives’ dance-?”

“Shhh!”

The man holding you didn’t seem to notice or care about the commentary, he only had eyes for you, even as he gave one finally suggestive push of his hips, before letting your legs touch the ground again. Then he slid his arms around you and lifted you back into a proper seated position on the chair.

Of course, he just used this position to his advantage too and caged you by gripping the back of the chair with his hands. That’s when he settled on your lap, silently urging you to keep your eyes on him again and get lost in the feeling of his body on yours. He moved in steady, circling motions, always making sure you felt the brief touch of something hard at the height of every rotation.

Then the song hit its ending pitch and Kix used his grip on the chair to pull himself forward, pressing his chest flush against yours. He lingered there, breath fanning your skin and his lips hovered tantalizingly over yours. Said lips whispered the song’s iconic line just before he closed that small distance and- 

And kissed your cheek instead of your mouth.

Even if you wanted to, you couldn’t have stopped the whine that left you. It earned you a chuckle from him and his lips brushed your ear as he whispered, “So, what do you say, cyare? Are you seduced?”

All you could manage was a small nod and, though it was very unlikely that heard what Kix asked, Fives let out an annoyed, “Seriously?”

To please them both you let out a shaky praise, “Both of you could definitely give the professionals a run for their money.”

Everyone seemed pleased at that. Kix finally leaned back, getting up from your lap and offering to help you up like a gentleman.

Or at least, he would have, if Jesse hadn’t jumped up then.

“Oh no, baby, you stay right there. Fives and Kix can’t have all the fun. I think it’s only fair that all of us get to show off our potential.”

Hardcase, Tup, and Echo all cheered at that, and when Jesse started climbing out of the booth, they drummed their hands on the table like the music for a grand entrance. Kix gave you one final wink before making room for Jesse, who only wasted time in doubling back to the table for a moment.

“Hold on, need props for this one!” and he plucked the cherry garnish from Echo’s drink. Echo gave an indignant look as Jesse turned to you again and jabbed a finger at Hardcase, “Hit it!”

Again a beat poured out of the speakers and Jesse wasted no time. His hips instantly started jolting to the music as he put the skewer of fruit between his teeth. When Jesse moved his body it was hard and fast, constantly in motion just as the song demanded. He definitely had some moves and used the bouncing thrusts to push himself closer to where you were seated.

Like most of his brothers, he had forgone the top half of his armor that night, leaving his chest covered in nothing but his blacks. Keeping just an arm’s length away from you, Jesse started rubbing his hands down his sides, until he got to the hem of his shirt. Then, he pulled the fabric out from his belt and lifted it, revealing his well-toned muscles to your wide eyes.

Your greedy eyes pleased him and pulled the garnish from his teeth, “Like what you see, baby?”

He didn’t stop there, of course. Making sure it caught your eye, he trailed the cherry down his chest until it met bare skin. Juice from the fruit collected in the dips of Jesse’s abs as he rubbed it across his stomach. It was your turn to lick your lips, which pleased him even more.

“Come here, mesh’la, I’ll let you have a taste-”

“What the hells is going on up here?!”

The unfamiliar voice had all of you snapping out of whatever debaucherous bubble you had built around yourselves. Somehow, in the midst of all this, no one really seemed to care that you were all still in a corner booth on 79’s second floor.

Well, the manager cared, and he was standing there looking over the scene (you, disheveled in a chair, and Jesse rubbing fruit over his abs) with absolute disgust on his face.

“What? We’re having fun, what’s it to you?” Jesse snapped, clearly annoyed that his shot with you was being interrupted.

“Fun!?” the manager mocked in horror, “Son, this is a bar, not a strip club! Not to mention the racket all of you were making,” he cast a glare at the booth, “out! All of you, get out!”

Hardcase jumped from his seat, “Hold on a damn minute!”

“OUT!” the manager seethed, “And just be thankful I’m just throwing you out tonight and not banning all of Torrent Company!”

Knowing that they would listen if you stepped in, you got up from your seat and took Jesse’s hand, “Come on, boys, we don’t want to be any trouble, right?”

Jesse and Hardcase were still narrowing their eyes at the other man, but, catching your look, they softened. When Tup, Fives, and Echo started gathering their things from the table at your pleading eyes, they finally mumbled their agreements.

Thankfully, the manager didn’t feel the need to continue his berating comments as everyone filed out the door. But, of course, because these were your boys we’re talking about, the moment they were outside, the loud cursing and complaining started.

“This is bantha shit!”

“Buzzkill!”

“No fun!”

“Had the perfect song for my dance!”

You laughed at their array of comments, especially when Hardcase flung his arms around you and clung to you as everyone started walking. “Come on, boys, it’s not that bad! Listen, I say we get some booze from the corner store up the way, and we can make as much of a racket as we want back at my place.”

The words didn’t strike you as anything suggestive. The boys had drunk at your apartment plenty of times before, but, given the context, it was no surprise that some of them exchanged looks.

“I’m in,” Echo said, the corner of his lips lifting as he caught Fives’ eye.

Tup, who was walking backwards in front of you, flashed that toothy smile of his, “Sounds like a perfect night to me.” That’s when he reached up and pulled his hair loose from his top knot. “And back at your place, gives the rest of us a chance to really show you our moves.” He winked at his curls came cascading down.

Hardcase tightened his grip on you, “Oh, kriff yeah!”

Well, looks like the night was just getting started.

I want to give my sincere apologies to all the Jesse Girls, plz don't strangle me for cock blocking you lol

taglist: @blueink-bluesoul @anxiouspineapple99 @starrylothcat @sinfulsalutations @commander-sunshine @dystopicjumpsuit @wolffegirlsunite @sunshinesdaydream @arcsimper5

[menace-behaviour]

*Season 2, Episode 1*

Buck: I want to kiss you.

Eddie: *not paying attention* What?

Buck: I said if you die, I won't miss you.

[that-scouse-wizard]

Through Thick and Thin

Day 4 of @cursebreakerfarrier‘s Back to School challenge (a day late I know 😂) Technically takes place before Hogwarts but this was too good not to use with these two. Characters mentioned here belong to @kc-and-co and @lifeofkaze 

Robin bounced excitedly in her seat as the car came to a crawl before stopping. To muggles, the castle in front of them would have looked ominous and decrepit, not a place any sane person would want to go exploring. For Robin however, the ancient structure was a place she had been excited about since her parents had first proposed the idea to her. Today was the day she and Nick would be attending Katriona Cassiopeia’s famous quidditch camp.

Though she was far more enthusiastic than her twin by a country mile, Nick seemed pleased to have finally arrived as well.

The family exited their vehicle, Robin practically launching herself towards the boot, where her rucksack was stored. “Excited?” David asked, chuckling as he opened it up for her, she snatched the bright yellow Wimbourne Wasps rucksack. Nick by contrast took his dark blue one out much more calmly.

“Right kids, remember. Everything you need is those rucksacks, write to us if you get homesick and most important, be careful. Yeah?” David asked, Robin nodding vigorously, whilst Nick did similar.

“With Rath and Cassiopeia around, I’m sure you’ll be in good hands, stay out of trouble you two.” Merula warned light-heartedly, with Robin due to meet up with Reva, chaos was bound to occur.

“Will do mum and dad, love you!” Robin called as she began sprinting for the castle, “I’ll race you Nick!”

“Hey that’s cheating!” Nick shouted after her, giving both of his parents a brief hug before taking off after his sister.

David and Merula beamed, his arm over her shoulder as they watched their children running for the camp, “You know that without us or the Amaris around Robin and Reva are going to be completely uncontrolled, right?” Merula asked.

“Oh yeah,” David nodded in agreement, “I gave Murph and KC the heads up, they’ll think of something for them.”

“I hope you’re right,” Merula laughed, finally turning her attention from the kids towards her husband, “In the meantime, we’re free to do whatever we want.” David smirked as Merula gave him a knowing look, they rarely had time away from the kids nowadays, they aimed to make the best of it.

Robin cheered triumphantly, entering the foyer where several other children who were first timers had gathered. Even going so far as to do a victory pirouette and bow, she had won the race against her brother. Nick came in shortly after, rolling his eyes at Robin’s showboating. Just as she was about to start jokingly gloating, a squeal of delight cut her off.

“Robin!” It was none other than Reva Amari, who immediately tackled her best friend, Robin happily returning the vice-like grip.

“Have you got the snacks?” Robin asked, Reva nodded.

“Have you got the drinks?” Reva asked in response, Robin returned the nod.

The two of them giggling at the thought of the epic midnight feast that would be sure to come about, chock full of sweets, salty snacks and soft drinks. After a long day of quidditch and causing chaos, such a banquet was the perfect way to celebrate as well as defy any trivial ‘lights out’ rule.

“Alright first-timers, settle down.” The announcement came from Murphy McNully, the crowd of children falling silent as he wheeled over to them, followed by an imposing Erika Rath, “Now as I’m sure you’re aware we have four teams for you to join up with, Rowan’s Ravens, Dora’s Dragons, Freddie’s Foxes and Llewelyn’s Lions. For those who already know what it is the teams do, feel free to choose. If not, Miss Rath hear can explain their functions. In the meantime, I would like to have a word with Reva Amari and Robin Willows.”

A few curious glances went the duo’s way but for the most part, no one but Nick knew who they were. Those who already knew what each house stood for rushed to boxes containing the jerseys. Others began queuing up for questions directed at Erika. In the middle of the chaos, Robin and Reva held each other’s hands so they wouldn’t lose each other.

As Murphy waved his wand to begin levitating his wheelchair up a set of stairs, the girls followed after him, giving them an overhead view of the others below. Robin seeing Nick now donning the pink of Dora’s Dragons, they were focused more on broom making, team management and playing the game at an introductory level. Something that Robin thought would be suited for Nick.

“Now then,” Murphy began as he lead the two of them into his office, “I hear the two of you have a certain talent for pranks.” Both girls grinned at that they did enjoy it, especially if the target was either Dylan or Nick.

“Judging by your smirks I’d say there’s an 89% chance of what your parents have told me being right. Which is perfect as I have a special assignment for the two of you,” Murphy’s statement peaked the girl’s interest, “I happen to believe I’m at least somewhat successful at picking out people with the potential to be great quidditch players, so far I’ve been proven right with David, Lizzie, Orion and even my darling wife. I believe the best way is to get them to hone their talents. However, in your case, I feel that we can channel your innate desire towards mischief-making for not just your own benefits but even the entire camp!”

Robin and Reva gave each other, and Murphy, a puzzled look. Where exactly was he going with this?

“That’s why, I want the two of you to start a prank war with each other.” There was a long pause as such a revelation stunned the two girls.

“You’re serious?” Robin asked, just the faintest hint of joy seeping into her tone. Reva was pinching herself to be sure it wasn’t a dream.

“Indeed,” Murphy grinned, “There are a few things to consider. For one, do nothing that would damage equipment, do not target staff members and above all else, do not tamper with my wife’s coffee.” Both girl’s nodded, shuddering at the last point, being fairly confident nothing would placate Katriona Cassiopeia’s rage if that were to happen.

“Excellent! Now, go fetch your jerseys, I’m sure you’d both make a fine addition to Llwelyn’s Lions.”

The two of them were positively giddy with excitement at being allowed almost free reign to do whatever they wanted as far as pranking went. Yet even so, they scrutinised each other, silently trying to come up with the best way to get ahead in the coming prank war. Even as they took on the Lion’s lavender colouration, they dared not turn their back on the other.

They both rounded a corner into the mess hall, all students from every house were gathered there, enjoying a banquet of sandwiches and cakes with juice and water as refreshments. At the centre piece was a beautifully baked Victoria sponge, somehow untouched and so perfect for smashing into someone’s face.

Robin and Reva looked at each other, they began slowly walking towards the cake, that became a light jog, then a run until finally it was a full on sprint. Robin had always been faster off the broom and reached the cake first. Yet, Reva slammed into her, planting Robin’s face into the cake. Robin was down briefly but far from out. She took a fistful of cake, cream and jam before smearing into Reva’s face.

With that declaration of war made, the food fight soon became a free for all. Something sure to go down in the history books as one of the greatest welcome’s to the quidditch camp.

[fowlblue]

Tell us about an Artemis Fowl au you've been cooking up, if you'd like!

I’ll admit, the vast majority of my AUs that I’ve been thinking of are either A. Mostly just fun to picture, with little plot (such as a Winged AU), or B. TimSpiro and not much else, lol- however, I will take the opportunity to talk a bit about my Evil Tim AU, since it has lived rent-free in my head for a few weeks now.

So the initial thought of the AU is similar to others I’ve had before: encouraged by newfound ‘friend’ Jon Spiro, Tim tries to put a stop to his family’s fairy shenanigans, Artemis (and Angeline, in this case) go behind his back in an effort to undo the damage, and Tim, overwhelmed with it all, ultimately decides to leave Fowl Manor. He heads to the Needle after Spiro, seeing an opportunity to cause discord (and potentially seeing an ally in Tim) invites him to stay and become his partner-in-crime. All fine and dandy and straightforward- Tim, however, bores of this quickly.

Tim finds that the mafia-and-gang sort of criminal underworld utterly fascinating, the sudden violence and showboating unlike anything from his ‘old-money’ background. Tim finds it... thrilling, and thus begins to push his power around, gathering allies under the table. While he and Spiro are affectionate on the surface, it’s a shallow sort of ‘love’, and soon Tim realizes he’d much rather have it where he’s in charge of it all, fed up with being in the background any longer.

In one fell swoop, Tim takes over the Needle, and, realizing it would be best to have a scapegoat in case things go south, spares Jon, but only in return for the man ceding the power in his business and criminal enterprises. Just like that, Tim has power, wealth, and a brand-new castle- now comfortable in his position, he begins taking over rival forces within Chicago and bending them to his rule, one by one. He decorates himself with iron jewelry, rings and bracelets and even a heavy torc (a sort of necklace), carrying an iron-topped cane with him- a massive spite (and internal superstition) meant to drive away the fairy folk.

Jon is powerless to stop it, held prisoner within the Needle. While the two were once able to coexist peacefully, Tim becomes controlling, manipulative, and in time, incredibly abusive, taking out pent-up frustrations of his former family and his cruel whims out on Jon. While the man makes several attempts to end Tim himself, angry at the position he has found himself in, every time ends in failure, and eventually, Jon decides to turn to an outside source for help when things begin to become physically dangerous- he reaches out to Artemis Fowl, the Second.

Artemis is initially confused by the message- he finds a deep sense of dread within him when, minutes later, it is followed by another:

Stay out of this- Sr.

Uneasy, he debates what to do about it, until Angeline puts her foot down- they’re staying out of this for now. She will not lose Artemis in the same way she has now lost her husband- whatever internal problems are happening at the Needle, they will not take part in it. Ultimately, neither Angeline or Artemis are aware of just how bad things have gotten- Artemis, however, swiftly finds a solution. He summons his dear uncle, Foxy. The only man who can safely approach Fowl Senior in his cruel, quick-tempered state.

Foxy becomes a sort-of spy for Artemis, visiting the Needle often in order to steal away information to later give to his nephew. He, however, is shocked at just how far his brother has fallen, and the now broken-down and sickening state he has left Spiro, his supposed ‘partner’ in. Things spiral from bad to worse when Jon first vanishes from the Needle, followed closely by Foxy from his Norfolk home. Meanwhile, Tim’s power in Chicago, and eventually the region, only grows, and his hatred and anger with it.

Needless to say, nothing good comes of this.

(Also- huge, huge shoutout to @fowl-fox for listening to me ramble about this AU so much and helping me develop it well, well beyond what I initially started with. Go check out his blog if you love awesome AF headcanons and fics, cause his stuff is incredible!)