#shitwaffles

[glompcat]

Had an interaction with the NYPD so egregious my father, looking over the paperwork for the $500 in fines I had to pay, shook his head sadly and said the only explanation for any of this is homophobia.

[fantasticalleigh]

June 21st 2024 Friday Night Smackdown photos + thoughts

I've been so excited for this show! Too bad it was so hot because by the end I was pretty sweaty but overall it was such a good show omfg

Including some photos but they all came out like ass bc my phone is so old and I was more concerned with being in the moment.

We got there a bit late and were still in the merch line when the show started. When we finally found our seats it was nearly 7pm and Tozawa's Speed title match was already ending. I forgot who he was up against tbh.

Punk opened up the show of course and gave a really good promo about Chicago and his rivalry with Drew. Everyone was eating it up. Personally I have a love/hate relationship with Punk so I still found it entertaining but wasn't cheering for him exactly. he mocked Drew and I've been calling it since Clash and since Punk announced he was gonna attend this Smackdown that I believed Drew was gonna show up and get revenge, just didn't know when. Paul Heyman interrupts Punk's promo to warn him to leave bc even though he's off limits to the Bloodline that they wouldn't be afraid to go after him. And then Paul begs Punk to take him with him :'( Poor man needs a break. They had a long hug. it was really hard to hear what paul was saying most of the time because of how loud the 'we want roman' and 'fuck you solo' chants were. solo interrupted the promo and the boos got so freaking loud i didn't hear a word of what he said. when the bloodline tried advancing on punk we saw cody running out from behind the front row to help punk and everyone went nuts.

(the groups of guys behind and beside me had the funniest commentary running all through the show to the point that sometimes i either couldn't hear or pay attention to what was going on in the ring. also, the sound at the Allstate Arena is absolute TRASH and sometimes you just couldn't hear a word that was being said when backstage promos were being shot so everyone just sat in annoyed silence until the volume was finally raised.)

i'm not gonna go over every single thing in the 'episode' that happened bc that would make this way too long and it's really late so i'm just writing about highlights

Bianca vs. Michin vs. Chelsea Green for Money in the Bank was super fun. Everyone was cheering for Bianca and Chelsea mostly but the crowd definitely popped when Chelsea stole the pin. I love her and really hoped she would get Queen of the Ring but I'm happy with this win and happy with Nia as Queen. Chelsea imo is amazing to watch bc she's doing amazing character work as the self-centered/egotistic/entitled/hot and bratty "spicy margarita" character she is. She's just so damn funny and I'm glad we get to see more of her.

All the Bloodline stuff--yet another member has joined the chat. Tbh i really don't care that much about the Bloodline and never have but at this point I'm cheering for Roman to come back along with everyone bc I don't think Solo Sikoa is all that impressive yet. Idk. He may grow on me. But every time Solo or Tama Tonga were out everyone started booing or shouting 'we want Roman'. Which says plenty. We also got to see a lot of Randy and KO tonight which was really great bc i love them and they're truly out there being the defenders of Smackdown any time the Bloodline pulls their cheating bs. The guys behind me were calling Solo "Temu Roman" which was hilarious. Jacob debuting today looked rad as hell and already a huge threat (possibly a greater one than Solo imo) and apparently he's a big deal in indie wrestling so I'm interested in seeing what he brings to the table.

Bayley was on screen for like ten seconds :(

Andrade was great but for some reason I don't really connect with him so I end up sort of tuning out whenever he's on. I feel bad about it but idk, I feel like he doesn't have a truly distinctive character yet that would actually make me interested in him but all his looks are nice at least.

Randy vs. Carmelo vs. Tama Tonga:

Great match. Melo also taking that win was unexpected but considering he's had mostly losses since his debut this is a good thing. Plus I got a (BAD) photo of Randy doing The Thing before the match and I think that's neat.

(every time i see the MITB briefcases i quietly sing to myself "I got money in the BAYank" from that T-Pain song)

also got this hilarious pic of Randy who looks like a lion pouncing on Mello who looks like a frightened gazelle running away lol

for possibly my favorite part of the night:

MY MANS GOT HIS VENGEANCE.

when this happened in the middle of Grayson Waller's promo (can we talk about how GOOD that shot was??? with the garage door pulling up to do the reveal??) everyone lost their shit and started booing Drew. I was grinning ear to ear bc i fucking CALLED IT. Though i'd hoped we'd have actually gotten to see it happen and not only the aftermath. this is a very shit pic but drew + the cameraperson walked all the way from backstage to the entry and drew just fucking tossed Punk off his shoulders like a sack of potatoes. it was hot. it was wrong and it was wild. the people of chicago cried out in absolute outrage and the boos rained down. look at your god now, i would have said if i had the courage (and lung capacity) he is a mortal like us, he brought this on himself, and he ain't shit.

i was too busy cheering to notice drew taking punk's bracelet? watch? idk. it looked shiny and silver. and then he left without a word but backstage argued with Nick Aldis and others before storming off. absolute cinema. everyone was still booing and i raised my plastic margarita jar in a toast to my beloved Scotsman.

(i'd really been hoping to hear his music live again tho)

at one point at the end of a match i sprang out of my seat and ran to the bathroom because i believed we were on a commercial break. commercials were playing on the screens, after all. i had literally just started washing my hands when i heard ~~L. A. KNIGHT~~ and then the music and i started swearing because i missed his entrance :( i was so annoyed lmao. (I was wearing black lipstick and the Judgement Day spiked vest and when i walked in a woman exiting at the same time saw me and said "Mami!" and it was great lol) (there were a lot of signs for rhea tonight btw we miss her!!!) anyway i got back to my seat while Knight was still in the ring but Logan Paul had just shown up and knocked him out and that sucked lmao for some reason I was sure they were actually going to fight tonight?? guess i was wrong. the guys next to me were cheering for logan, no shame do what you want but bleghhhhh

Cody did two appearances. first when he came out in his corporate attire and then again for his match with Solo. everyone sang his theme with gusto, and it was a pleasure to actually know the words this time. the pyro was WILD. and imo there was too much fog coming from it to the point the arena got noticeably hotter after the pyro went off. i was wearing a mesh shirt and i was still pretty sweaty. everyone did the WOAH. i think cody was wearing his Mania fit so it was really cool to see it again; his costumes are the best in the WWE rn and no one else comes close. at least not in the men's division. the match itself was kinda disappointing with how quickly it was disqualified bc of the bloodline's bs. not that i expected there to be a title drop or anything then and there but it all happened so quickly and i was so annoyed that when jacob came out i was sort of checked out. obvs i wondered who he was but there was no name card on the screens or anything so i was lost until i checked the subreddit later. cody got his ass beat and even tho randy and KO tried to help the bloodline still won and ended the episode and everyone booed them.

was it good tv though? absolutely. i feel lucky to have been there and seen it all live. this is only my second live WWE show and i'm hooked. i can't wait to watch the episode and hear the commentary.

after the cameras stopped rolling The Awesome Truth came out and everyone fucking lit up when Mix and R Truth came out singing their song and everyone was super into it, screaming 'WHAT'S UP?' back to Truth. tbh after the way the main event match went it was a perfect pick me up to end the night and it got our energy back up immediately. then the Judgement Day came out and the boos came out again for Dominik and JD (but mostly Dom). i was there in my dorky lil spiked vest cheering my babies on. it was a great fucking match, super entertaining and they were absolutely feeling the energy. Miz and Dom were having a contest throughout trying to get the loudest crowd response and Miz was raising his arms getting us to build up to it and then Dom tried getting us on his side but when we didn't or just booed him he more or less flipped us off without actually giving the bird lol. he also took a bottle of Prime and tasted it, only to spit it back out in disgust which actually earned him a few cheers and several shouts of "fuck Prime!!" i may have seen it from the wrong angle but it did also look like he wiped the bottle on his butt before tossing it away. R Truth did the five knuckle shuffle and everyone got hyped and screamed the you can't see me thing and then he did it again with Miz and then they did their tag team finisher. idk the name for it but it's the dancey in sync move they do. it's adorable and i love them so much. but back to the match, all of them were fantastic and of course Awesome Truth won, but at one point when it was quiet enough i yelled out "YOU SHOULD'VE LET R-TRUTH JOIN THE JUDGEMENT DAY" and a few people laughed which felt really good lmao.

and after the match ended and everyone was clapping, Miz asked for a mic and told us (and this is very paraphrased and relying on my memory) that he 'doesn't get to do this often' and he isn't used to being cheered so much so this was really great and he was thankful to chicago for that. we cheered extra loud for that and then they left and it was over.

i'm still newish to the wwe universe but i know Miz was a world champ not that long ago. i haven't seen much of that run and i always thought he was a very likable character for all his faults so hearing that he wasn't used to being cheered broke my heart a little bc i like him a lot.

anyway it was amazing overall and i really hope they come back again soon. when i went to RAW in march they gave us all a promo code for early access tickets for this show, but this time there wasn't one, to my knowledge.

after tonight i now have a cody rhodes shirt, a deeper love for wrestling, and a new friendship bracelet. i have a ton that i made for myself a while back and a couple given by friends/family. i wore them all today and after the show while waiting for my brother near the merch line a woman came up to me and asked if i wanted to swap bracelets. i was like :o i didn't know people did that here!! and she said a few do, that she'd given a couple away already and luckily i'd just made an 'omg it's cody rhodes' and a rhea ripley one the night before so i happily gave her the rhea one and she gave me a 'mami's always on top' bracelet in return and just like the Judgement Day bracelet my dear @rogueimperator got me for my birthday, i will treasure them forever <3 i should have asked for her name tbh but thank you kind stranger! now i need to make more for next time :)

a lot of people were also very sweet about my goth look for the night--i was trying to channel Rhea for sure lol but my black lipstick was rubbing off everywhere and i was so sweaty because of the vest and boots lol--not a good choice for a 90 degree day but we're all doing our part to hasten Rhea's hasty return, right??? a bit of sweat is no problem in the long run.

[syntheticpaperd0ll]

actually its kind of alienating to have to google common slang because it comes and goes so fast thanks to what i can only assume is tiktok's influence. what the everloving fuck is a womp womp?? what the shit is skibidibi ohio rizz??? who the hell is bozo????

[fun-ghoul-irl]

Kobra Kid and i are NOT a couple. we are NOT dating and i have NOT eaten his ass!! IT WAS A THREAT!! AND YOU'RE STILL SHORT!!!!!

-red thrill

Yes you are!!!

AND FUCK YOU YOU FUCKING CUNT IM NOT FUCKING SHORT YOU FUCKING BITCHY FUCKING ASSHOLE FUCK YOU YOURE THE FUCKING SHORT ONE YOU FUCKING SHITWAFFLE 🤬🤬🤬🤬

[onlyplatonicirl]

Thanks to you shitwaffles on tumblr I have now been booped over 8,000 times. I HAVENT EVEN HIT 1k YET.

[rayshippouuchiha]

new favourite wild tag is "danzo is a shitwaffle"

truer words have never been spoken

[ginstermoff]

I hate it when I read some shit about ppl experiencing misogyny and go "yeah same" and some absolut shitwaffle tells me

"Aren't you supposed to be non-binary"

Well, Debrah, aren't you supposed to mind ya business?

Just because I'm non-binary doesn't mean I don't experience misogyny due to my perceived gender, what's not clicking?

[queereldritchgalaxyprincess]

ugh thanks to the influx of Twitter refugees I just realized there's a nonzero chance my shitwaffle ex might come back here and like, I don't want to have to deal with keeping an eye out for his fuckboi nonsense 🙄

edit: to the obnoxious twit who reblogged this and tried to make it into some skeleton war shit: I hope you develop a sudden and severe allergy to whatever fabric your underwear is made of.

[elmodoescrimes]

HOLY SHITWAFFLES I HATE STEPPING ON LEGOS!!! WHY DO THEY HURT SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ):

[somerandomadhdhuman]

i have found THE formula to for exclamations.

(swear)(food) [optional: on a (noun)] with a side of (food) (exclamation)

Example: Shitwaffles on a stick with a side of ravioli, WHYY

[macksting]

Insults are difficult.

I've had a really bad headache off and on for weeks, so this might not be wholly coherent, but insults are hard. There's some guides for how to insult others in an ethical way, I like those guides. Vaspider had a good method I was previously unfamiliar with involving just calling them objectively unpleasant things or things bad at their jobs (steel wool thong). Another common one is DAH DAHdah syllables, which is where you get ones like "shitwaffle." But what I really wanna get at is: 1) Insults are transgressive. That doesn't make them bad; humor is transgressive too. But it does mean that most insults are based on trying to make someone feel bad by telling them they are a thing they think, or you think, is bad, such as a cuckold or an illegitimate child or where you poop from. As a result, most insults that are even marginally effective tend to throw someone under the bus. Most. There's some good ones. My point is that this is why insults are difficult. 2) They're usually not very good at making the other person feel bad. They can make them angry if they're really effective, but you're probably insulting them to make yourself feel better about a situation that annoys or upsets you. (I'm just assuming we're not all assholes in this regard.) In which case, your insults should suit your needs. If you know they won't actually care if you call them a fart nugget, but it's satisfying to you to call them that, then call them a fart nugget. Most folks we're insulting don't actually care if we insult them. You're doing it for you, prolly, not them. Find what satisfies you. This, I think, frees one from feeling restricted to using only a narrow range of invective that we think might be effectively hurtful, but won't cause collateral damage or play into someone's very real oppression. From our perspective the person you're insulting isn't likely to care if you call them a slur* or you call them a smeg chisel. The people who already agree with you might. You'll want to feel like you said something later. So make your vitriol clever. It won't be very effective anyway. 3) Sidenote: Analyzing what someone is saying and telling them it sounds like something awful people would say or is being said for awful reasons, isn't or shouldn't be an insult, though it sure can be vitriol. So if I am reading someone's opinions and tell them they sound TERFy, that's a distinct class of statement. It's arguing with their opinions, not trying to roast them on a spit. (I might do that too.) * Again, I am assuming people reading this aren't monsters.

[dancingspirals]

Whenever I think about what is 'real' for human interactions, I remember this cake.

When it is too hot, the human body is physically stressed. People will not behave in the same manner they will at any other time. When people are very hungry, when they are very tired, when they are in pain, that isn't the person that they are.

Earlier this summer, when it was 104 inside my car even with the AC blasting, I screamed at someone who cut me off in traffic. It didn't matter because they didn't hear it, but once I very literally cooled off, I wondered why i was so ANGRY? It wasn't a big deal! I don't think that who I 'really' am is the person pterodactyl screeching 'You shitwaffle!' at another car and I don't the person in the other car is a shitwaffle.

So again:

Don't judge people too harshly for what they said when it was 109 outside.

[fun-ghoul-irl]

crash wants to know if your a shit waffle. (they think you might be)

i am not a shitwaffle

[onlyplatonicirl]

We're very good shitwaffles :D

It’s like walking around with fifty toddlers on child leashes

[supercodi]

If you haven’t yet come across my protein waffle recipe, here it is! If you have already come across my protein waffle recipe: This is a revised version 🙌 . . I’ve made at least 1,000 waffles since I posted the original recipe and have made little tweaks here and there to help make them less of a challenge to make. 😁 ... I can’t stress enough the importance of bananas with at least some green on them. The starch in the green bananas is what helps hold them together better. 👍 ... Also make sure to use ground chia seeds. You can grind them in a coffee grinder if you can only find them whole in the store ( this is what I have to do ). 👌 ... You might also notice the bananas and chia seeds are measured in grams. You will need a food scale for this. You can try to guess but generally that doesn’t work out too well 😂 ... Oh and yes, you can make these as pancakes just make them small so you can flip them easier. 💯 ... Good luck! If you try them out, make sure to tag me! 🧇❤️ . . #shitwaffles #proteinwaffles #shityouwillactuallycook #nutrition #waffles #sundaywaffles #protein #bananarecipe #breakfast #health #fitness https://www.instagram.com/p/CC1vrt0MW_9/?igshid=7lity4fpcpjp

[jellycotxt]

you swear!!! congratulations, buddy!!!

-sonic lock

BUT WHAT IF I GET IN TROUBLE