#shitty writing horrible person etc etc

[silverfairywings]

Thank you for liking my Eris fic <3 this is a side blog btw so I won’t be following anyone because I don’t want any association with my main blog lol the pt 2 will come out sometime in the near future

[varpusvaras]

Winnick will come this close to writing a good, rightfullly angry character with BPD/CPTSD and ruin it by making him his conception of "a dangerous psychopath" because dc's understanding of mental illness begins and ends with the joker.

I like that Jason was angry i'm not gonna lie I enjoy the "bad victim who doesn't accept that they were a necessary sacrifice, who doesn't think what happened to them is something they should be expected to tolerate, like fuck your greater good, you weren't there, it isn't worth this." I think even looking at Jason's past before getting adopted he has reason to be angry, like he is poor af and starving and he had to take care of his mom and his dad is in jail because he couldn't see another way to provide and he gets trafficked -he has so many reasons to be angry. And he's not, and I love jaybin, but I think there are so many ways and things he can be angry about without it feeling classist. And I love that he can't emotionally regulate, that he has so clearly BPD/CPTSD because why the fuck would he not, have you seen his life (and that's not even counting the csa hc, which i am because willfully and consistently implying csa and then not addressing it/denying it feels like feeding into a culture of taboo that ruins lives and getting away with covert victim-blaming at the same time). The issue is that they lack finesse or any kind of understanding of anger. The think anger is a personality trait. They think angry = evil. They think being angry means you're violent at and about everything, that you shoot indiscriminately even though you've known better since you were a kid, that you're suddenly treating women like shit (which, wtf seriously) which okay maybe THEY treat women shitty for no reason when they're angry, but that'd be more of a them problem I'd say. Their portrayal of anger is classist because their conception of emotions hasn't evolved since fucking Descartes. Think anger = bad = poor and not only doesn't it occur to them that this is classist, they so instinctively assign moral value to the concepts of poor and angry that they don't realise it and just conceptualise poor=angry and end up with incredibly classist portrayals of anger. You can write characters that are mentally ill and violent without being ableist, you can write characters that are poor and angry without being classist, but that requires a level of respect for people, introspection, humility willingness to learn about the sensitive topics you are exploring that is simply not accessible to Winnick and so many other dc writers.

And here comes my very hot take that I'm too cowardly to say off anon: the pit shouldn't have healed Jason's malnutrition. Like, outside of canon I love big jay, I love big men who are emotionally vulnerable and need comfort etc. but in canon? It just comes off as another way to adultify Jason, and make the horrible things that happen to him acceptable. Jason "sleeping with Talia because he is fucked up about Bruce" because they both look like adults until you realise this is actually just rape and you can't put any responsibility of Talia taking advantage of the kid under her care (very ooc of course) on the child himself. Jason fighting Mia looking like a 40 years old beating up a teenage girl when they're the same damn age. Fucking Ethiopia 2.0. And Jason's murders as well, for the matter. Like don't get me wrong the duffle bag of doom is an iconic villain move, but it's just that: a massive shock effect and a "psychopathic" move. We shouldn't need Jason beheading anyone to be horrified, because just one murder, if written correctly, should be enough. A child killing someone is a terrible thing. A child being put in a position where they think killing someone is the only solution to ending suffering (thinking about the Garzonas case) is a terrible thing. A kid trying to kill his murderer (because fuck his death has to matter it has to) and only begging to be allowed it should be horrifying. Jason, with his unhealed malnutrition making him look a couple of years smaller and younger than his physical age, should look his mental age. It should be impossible to look away from the reality of what he is: a traumatized teenager who wasn't allowed to grow up. And he has a gun. This is already a horror story.

Make utrh!Jason a villain if you must, but have the guts to sit with it. Don't shove the fact that he was a hero and a victim under the rug because it's uncomfortable. Sit with the unease that sometimes someone is doing something bad and is suffering a lot, and maybe they're doing the bad thing because they don't know how to survive the suffering, and suddenly it's not easy separating hero from villain from victim. Your imaginary lines in the sand will not protect you from the crude reality of the complicated and shitty situations you have chosen to depict; you open the can of worms now you can't look away and let the worms roam free just because you're squeamish.

How does it feel to be psychic and be in my head and write part of my essay on Jason for me? Fuck, I have so much to say about this but I need a good night of sleep to formulate it correctly. Look for a longer answer tomorrow, but in the meantime, everyone sit down and look at this and look at it hard. Thank you.

[castleofravens]

unpopular opinion but you're allowed to say that characters such as fitz or keefe or sophie exhibit toxic behaviors.

teenagers can be manipulative. teenagers can be cruel. teenagers can be jerks sometimes because they are still learning how to be people.

and saying they exhibit toxic behaviors isn't calling them toxic, just as saying a kid did something naughty (drawing on the walls, breaking something, etc.) doesn't make them a bad kid, you aren't defined by your behaviors because those are things you can change.

however it is still a perfectly valid thing to say "hey this behavior isn't healthy and they should be held accountable for this" because that's... something that is applicable to real life as well?

i'm a little older than a lot of the main keeper crew but still a teenager and i've dated people my age who were manipulative/toxic. you can absolutely have those behaviors as a teenager, and a shitty home life or mental health issues are explanations but they should never be excuses for that behavior.

topics such as this especially when they deal with trauma, mental illness, abuse, and interpersonal relationships should be looked at with way more nuance than a lot of people give it.

because yes, keefe (just as an example) does have textual evidence of toxic behaviors regarding his relationships (particularly with fitz and sophie), however that does not make him a toxic person. he does care about his friends and girlfriend (i don't remember if they made that official or not), he's just... inexperienced with relationships? and doesn't have much healthy examples from older figures to go off of for how he should act (just as fitz doesn't have healthy examples from older figures for how he should manage his emotions). (i would love to write an essay on cassius and gisela's relationship and how that affects keefe's relationships) (or the vackers' attitudes towards image and how that affects fitz - and biana's - self image)

i think a lot of keefe hate just stems from frustration that he doesn't really get held accountable a lot the same way other characters do, and i get that, but that still isn't an excuse to claim he's some horrible unredeemable person. he is a realistic and flawed character, you can't fit him in any "keefe good" "keefe evil" box, he simply is.. keefe? he definitely has shit he needs to work through but he's not... forever doomed to be some monstrous villain or whatever, a lot of people need a little (or big) nudge in the right direction to self awareness. people change, that is the nature of... i would say humanity but they're elves but i think the point would end up the same

[beneathsilverstars]

been doing research on writing plural systems for sif+loop in mundane modern aus, and i think i've got a solid idea of what i want to do! specifics may vary by au but i wanted a base set of headcanons to vary from, so sif+loop being a system can be a background fact of my au musings instead of something i have to reinvent every time.

(i'm a singlet so if any systems have concrit or thoughts they want to share i'd be happy to hear it! i'm not like planning a fic or anything currently, but it's still nice to not be working off of misconceptions for my silly little posts.)

siffrin took over as the main host in their late teens and doesn't remember anything from before that. in their early-mid 20s their work/housing situation was horrible and when they couldn't take another day like that, siffrin split into loop (who kept the mid 20s memories, with a new personality) and siffrin take two (who remembers the 17-20 era a bit better, but then there's a big gap). between the two of them they were able to cope better and hold a not-as-awful job and get a shitty apartment all to themselves!

siffrin fronts more often on average, because they're better at quietly accomplishing day-to-day tasks. but if he gets too overwhelmed or anxious (think their mini loop-backs in canon) then loop takes over, bc loop dgaf about some of the things siffrin worries about, and doesn't shut down as easily. but since they don't bottle up their feelings as severely, they're more likely to react outwardly and make rash choices like quitting their job, being rude, splurging on little treats, etc. so that's why siffrin is the default fronter for things like work and chores, when he's feeling up to it.

loop is fairly aware of what's going on while siffrin is fronting - sometimes they choose to tune more of it out, but they can catch most of it if they want to, and sometimes siffrin will talk to them or nudge them to pay attention. since they know at least the basics of what siffrin was up to, they can usually step in pretty smoothly when they need to take over! and it's very easy for them to take over, with or without siffrin's say-so, though they try to ask if it's not an emergency (and if it is an emergency, siffrin is likely trying to back away from the front anyway).

when loop is fronting, though, siffrin is entirely away, dreaming in the void. loop can nudge them for a vague opinion or relevant memory, but they can't hold a full conversation and they're not aware of what loop's doing. when loop puts them in the front again they're usually disoriented and need a moment for loop to tell them what's been happening. and again, loop is the one deciding to switch; sometimes siffrin might resist getting pulled back if they're still feeling bad, or get antsy and start reaching out if they've been asleep a while or are having bad dreams, but they're not gonna react to environmental situations since they're not aware of them.

mal is in there too but doesn't front. its role is to be socially hyper-vigilant, pointing out when other people might be upset at them so the alter who's fronting knows to fix it or avoid the person. it's been around longer than siffrin, and was helpful way back then, but now that siffrin and loop have worked out an effective balance and are fairly safe, mal's behavior is somewhat maladaptive (ha!). it's not super directly aware of the outside world like loop is, not anymore at least, but it does get secondhand memories from both siffrin and loop. it actually sometimes remembers facts and details that sif and loop both quickly forgot, because maybe those details will end up relevant to spotting and avoiding future problems - but since it got the memories secondhand and filtered them through a particularly paranoid worldview, it's likely to misremember subjective interpretations as literal truth, so you gotta take its claims with a grain of salt.

it mostly hangs out in the void imagining fractals and whatnot these days, keeping an eye on siffrin while they sleep. it occasionally perks up and chimes in with its pessimistic point of view when siffrin is really upset - it can communicate better with sleeping siffrin than loop can. loop is not on speaking terms with it because they're mad that it goes behind loop's back and makes siffrin more upset right when loop is trying to shield him from the upsetting situation. but siffrin doesn't mind it bc it's just trying to help in its own way, and sometimes it is helpful to face their fears in plain words instead of avoiding them. and siffrin will sometimes ask it for help with like, puzzles, because it's good at pattern recognition.

there's also a no-longer-quite-dormant alter that presumably fronted for much of the body's childhood. they don't hang out in siffrin and mal's void, and they don't talk to anyone else within the system. but now that the system is more safe and stable, every once in a while something will catch their attention and they'll gently push to the front and start talking. as soon as their train of thought is interrupted they're gone again, and the other alters don't even remember that they got usurped for a moment, a la siffrin's bits of telling childhood anecdotes in canon. loop and siffrin have surmised that they exist, and call them the lost one.

mal has also implied that there's at least one more dormant alter, but it's from before siffrin-and-loop's time and possibly mal's as well.

if something happens that's so distressing that siffrin retreats into headspace and loop won't take over either, the body goes into dissociated autopilot. it will follow basic one-step instructions (such as "follow me" or "eat this"), speak in a couple simple scripts (such as answering "how are you" with "i'm fine"), and complete rote tasks such as taking a familiar route home from work or going to bed. loop doesn't pay much attention because that would defeat the point / put them back in front, so they usually have very little if any idea of what happened in this state, but it is possible for outside events to catch their attention enough for them to try fronting again. otherwise they'll be back next time the body wakes up. siffrin, on the other hand, usually won't front for at least a day or two after this happens, and will likely have forgotten the events leading up to it as well.

it doesn't happen very often since it's the very last resort, after siffrin dissociating, loop taking over, and loop dissociating. loop and siffrin don't consider the autopilot an alter because it doesn't form memories, have emotions or opinions, or interact in the headspace; it just follows where it's led, by habit or outside influence. loop has argued in favor of trying to imbue it with more personhood so it's less uncanny for other people to interact with and can get loop's attention when the distressing thing is over, but siffrin argues that if it can think that defeats the point, and they'd just end up with this new alter and a new autopilot.

past all that, the specifics will depend on the exact au; particularly the ratio of loop time to siffrin time will depend on how much siffrin works and how awful their job is, whether siffrin and/or loop have friends yet, etc. but i think when they're doing pretty well they'd be happy with siffrin doing work/chores and most of the activities that they both enjoy (since then they'll both remember it), and loop fronting for maybe a third of their free time to do their own thing, and maybe here and there if something goes wrong at work. and then if siffrin starts feeling burnt out, they swap for a couple days of loop doing most things and siffrin just coming out for an hour or two. siffrin and mal probably talk maybe a couple times a month, unless siffrin is really going through it, in which case they might talk a lot for a couple days. it also might be possible for mal to eventually adapt a little more to being safe, and start providing a wider range of possible interpretations instead of just the worst case scenario.

ok that's all! and as i said, i'm totally open to feedback. :3

[flanaganfilm]

You have spoken about dealing with addiction in the past (congratulations on your sobriety, btw), and Hill House, Midnight Mass, Doctor Sleep, etc, all feature characters struggling with addiction. Do you find a sort of catharsis in writing those characters and their storylines, and do you find that having gone through that affects how you write those characters and their stories? p.s. if the question is too personal, I apologize. You are, of course, free to ignore it.

Happy to talk about it. I was writing about addiction long before I admitted having a problem. Looking all the way back to my student films, many years before Absentia, I can see myself starting to pick it apart. The fact is I was a really shitty drunk. I was absolutely a problem drinker. It was always that way, going back to school - I was never able to handle it, and there were times throughout my life starting very young when that thought would occur to me, and I'd get scared, and then I'd convince myself I was being dramatic and that I had no problem whatsoever.

The truth is that I didn't have an OFF switch, I was inclined to hide my drinking, and the older I got the more self-destructive I became when I was under the influence.

But I was also very committed to the belief that I could handle it, and that I didn't have an actual problem, so for years I'd coast by, telling myself whatever issues I may have had weren't so serious. "Nine times out of ten, I'm just fine - I'm the life of the party," I'd think. I wasn't, though, and soon enough it was 50/50 whether I'd have to make apologetic phone calls on a given hungover morning. And those stretches where'd I'd really let go and drink hard, the person who emerged was less and less like me. It got to the point I didn't recognize him at all - there was this stranger who lived inside, and if he got out, he was could destroy everything I held dear, and he didn't give two shits about it. Looking back at the last decade of my work with the perspective I have now, I can see an escalating subconscious urgency in the way I was talking about alcoholism and addiction. My 2003 student feature Ghosts of Hamilton Street features a wanna-be writer with a horribly self-destructive alcohol problem. The people in his life begin to physically disappear, and the world around him resets as though they never existed at all, so he's the only who notices. I was 25 years old when I made that movie, and looking at it now, the addiction issues are a huge blinking red light all over the movie. At the time, I thought it was just interesting context for the character.

I wrote the opening scene of Midnight Mass (which features Riley Flynn waking up from a blackout drunk driving session to find that he's killed someone) all the way back in 2010, eight years before I finally sobered up. That was always something I was absolutely terrified of - not that I'd die because of my drinking, but that I'd kill someone else and live with the consequences. That was probably my biggest fear for most of my life, if I'm honest. And there were mornings I'd wake up at home and wonder how the hell I'd driven myself there the night before. I remember those mornings with a stomach-turning degree of terror and shame.

It was always somewhat cathartic to write about characters with addiction issues. There's a long stretch between Absentia and Hill House where it appears that I'm not dealing with those themes in my work (though I'd argue there's a subtle addiction meditation at play in Before I Wake that I've only recently noticed), but I was also secretly working on Midnight Mass that entire time, and just pouring all of my thoughts and anxieties about alcoholism into that story. So while Oculus, Hush, Ouija: OOE, and Gerald's Game don't seem to dwell much on addiction, that's really because I was spending my nights pouring all of that into the pages of Midnight Mass, which existed alternately as a novel, a screenplay, and then a series during those years.

Working on Doctor Sleep is what brought it all to the surface for me. Stephen King's novel deals thoroughly with the theme of recovery (The Shining is about destruction of addiction, and Doctor Sleep is about the journey and reality of recovery), and a lot of people in my cast were sober. It was while we were shooting that film that I realized I needed to make a seismic change in my life.

My wife will say that reading the scene in Doctor Sleep where Dan sits at the Gold Room bar in the Overlook was when she knew I was reaching a critical moment. That scene isn't in King's book, and my first draft of that conversation between Dan and Jack was almost fifteen pages long. It's basically a prolonged argument between the addictive and sober voices in my mind, and writing that scene shook something loose in me. I stopped drinking just a few days before we filmed that scene for that movie, and I haven't had a drop since.

But for catharsis, Midnight Mass truly is the most personal piece of work I've ever made. Riley is a very thinly disguised avatar of myself. I look at that series and I see several distinct versions of myself in conversation with each other over more than a decade. I'm glad it took so long to get that show made, because if I'd made it in 2016 like I wanted to, I wouldn't have done a good job - there is no way I could have told that story until I was finally sober. If you listen closely to the AA meeting scenes between Riley and Father Paul throughout the series, you're basically looking directly into my conflicted brain over many, many years.

This year is my fifth year sober, and I spend my days happy, busy, and so grateful that I was able to make those changes before my drinking destroyed my career, my marriage, and my life. I was lucky. I am lucky. But since I finished Midnight Mass, I haven't felt that pull when I'm writing. I haven't felt those themes elbowing their way into my work. That part of me is still in here (it always will be), but I feel like I was somehow able, over many years, to coax it to sleep. I'm sure I'll return to those themes over the years, as I hope to learn more about myself and have more to say... but for now, those voices are peaceful and quiet. I have projects on the horizon that will touch on some of those things (if I'm able to make The Dark Tower, there's some wonderful elements with Eddie's addiction issues that I look forward to exploring) but it feels different.

One of the things I hold onto when I look back at that time is the hope that the work can be helpful to someone else who may struggle in a similar way. And talking to fans, I've heard here and there that it has, and that means the world to me. I think storytellers can't help but use their stories as a mirror, it's one of the ways we take ourselves apart, look at the pieces, and put them back. It's one of the only ways we can see ourselves clearly.

Sometimes we don't even realize we're doing it. It's only looking back that we can see ourselves, and our work, with any real clarity.

[mixelation]

on itatori and physical intimacy

i've been meaning to sort of flesh out this side of their relationship more. mutagenicity flavor itachi/tori is kind of weird in that it started as a joke, and also it started back when i didn't want to actually write about tori with anyone due to fear of cringe content. however since then my views on tori ships have shifted a lot. she is absolutely hooking up with all the other ships i've written for her. so does she ever hook up with her fake boyfriend??

the thing is. i don't think either tori OR itachi are very sexual. for the other tori ships

async: tori falls for the fantasy of a pretty man protecting her from her horrible shitty circumstances and is so unused to feeling this way it makes her act insane. she likes the fantasy minato represents and eventually learns to like and care about the person he actually is, but she's not actually overly interested in sex. that aspect of their relationship is mostly driven by minato (up unti the shinigami gets involved and it becomes.... weird), but she enjoys it because it makes her feel safe and cared about and also orgasms feel good, plus she does deep down like getting to do things for minato. she tolerates cuddling because she likes having a human weighted blanket and built in weapon

toxicity: tori hooks up with obito because she likes having power over him. that's mostly all there is to it. it's not completely devoid of affection (she wouldn't want to lord power over him that way if she didn't ALSO like him), but the sex itself isn't really an attractant for tori. i don't think they do a ton of cuddling or anything, EXCEPT when obito wants to see other people lose their minds by holding hands or putting his arm around her waist or, god forbid, kissing her in public

the weird kakashi/tori/obito au: it starts off as mostly a power thing. tori likes scams because of the sense of control it brings her, and she gets off on tricking kakashi. i don't think she'd organically go this route if obito wasn't egging her on, and it additionally pats her ego that kakashi is receptive. it does eventually collapse into at least partly "but it makes me feel closer to this person i like a lot" and also orgasms feel good. most of it is led by kakashi in what on the surface must seem like a painfully heterosexual way

now, the thing about itatori is.... itachi also isn't super into sex. i think he'd be into other types of physical affection (cuddling, kissing, hand holding, etc) but also he is so fucked up he doesn't really think of those things as options available to him outside of vague, impossible fantasies

plus they're both mutually like "this is FAKE we are FAKE DATING" even though after some point. they're just dating with some extra steps. they hang out in private. they have mutual hobbies and interests. they like each other in a mostly platonic but also very strongly "yes i AM hitching my ride to this person for potentially forever because who else would i do this with" way. so i think for a very long time, all their PDA is just for show, and they're definitely not having sex

now, itachi's relationship with his family is actually insane, and he spends a lot of nights crashing at tori and deidara's. so people definitely think they're having sex. why wouldn't they be?

(do not speak to deidara about this. he is upset about every single step of their relationship but also he has this weird sense of loyalty where he won't call them out in public. he knows itachi isn't sleeping with tori and he's annoyed he's in deidara's apartment and also he feels like he can't say anything!!!!!)

i think at some point it might occur to tori that she might actually be in this Forever, and it is not going to be fun to fake that she and itachi are Doing Stuff. like, they can just say they're private people, but also people are going to stop blaming them being physically awkward with each other on them being too young to be very experienced.

so one winter night itachi is over and deidara is being a bitch about wanting the heat on low because he like the apartment significantly colder than tori and tori is like. welp. itachi, you're sleeping in my bed tonight!! human space heater time~

and i think plasticity!tori would find bed sharing intrusive and uncomfortable, but mutagenicity!Tori has had this beaten out of her by growing up in settings where kids are expected to basically sleep on top of each other, and then field missions often require you getting in your teammate's personal space. and so..... it's nice? bed sharing is nice, actually. itachi is very warm. he, somehow, makes her feel safe.

and then tori slowly figures out itachi secretly actually really likes several types of physical affection BUT he's insane about it so she'll be like, "fine i'll take one for the team, it's not like i want to try this or anything. itachi, listen, i am literally your girlfriend. if you want to kiss me, you're allowed" and he's like "???? PANIC" and she's like "IT WOULD BE GOOD FOR OUR COVER" and he's like "oh, sure, yeah--"

so like five years into dating they kiss* for the first time and deidara is judging this stupid thing SO hard. you two are SO fucking dumb

also at some point deidara realizes he has no clue if they're hooking up or not. he's pretty sure if they do start fucking they will go about it in the most bizarre, alien courtship way possible so he has no idea how to judge. he hates them

they still don't like holding hands though

*there might be a fake kiss earlier if i think it's funny

[the-dark-parade]

WARNINGS! THIS STORY CONTAINS... angst + fluff + lilia×fem reader

A/N: Dear souls, my apologies. I have not finished the previous fic yet, and I'm already starting in the next. For the moment, that is paused. Yet again, I hope my work pleases you. If you are not comfortable with this, feel free to leave. If you would like a version with male reader instead, please request it. Likes, comments and reblogs are very much appreciated.

(inspired by @solxamber so you should def read their stories)

Now, the parade completely skips its first destination, and goes to the second!

Part 1,

THE RANT. and how hell began

(if only I didn't read that story...)

-----

"So girlie pop, have you SEEN the new fic going around lately? Like I've been going cray cray over it, and I swear, it's worth it!" My friend gushed, then proceeding to send you the link to it on AO3.

You internally rolled my eyes, already knowing that it's definitely going to be shit. She always does this, recommending you things that are 'top tier' just for them to have 0 kudos or comments other than the one she gives.

You sighed, thinking of just humoring her...

You hoped for the nth time that this wasn't another one of those random shitty fics she found in the sea of fanfictions.

So you clicked open the link.

And guess what you found?

You found the one, the only, (well not the one and only, but you get the gag) the shittest fanfiction of shit fanfiction.

Not the shittest of the shittest, but the writing kinda was.

There were spelling mistakes and bad grammar and usually you would be fine with that. As an experienced A03 and manga reader, you already prepared yourself for such things. But there was at least one. Every. Ten. Words. Or less.

It drove you crazy. And don't even get started on the plot.

Magical fantasy. It's a magical fantasy, you get that right? And by the way, it's medieval. Not that it's a bad thing, you love that troupe!

(live laugh love medieval novels)

BUT.

BUT!!!

Why... WHY WERE THERE FUCKING BOMBS AND MECHANICAL ENGINEERING BLOODY TANKS AND NUCLEAR BOMBS?!?!

Like what the fuck-

Ahem.

Anyways, the main gist of it was that you have the POV of the main character whose name is not even mentioned at all! At all!!

Like you'll think there would be at least 1 scene where it pops out but spoiler alert! It doesn't.

And he's called, what, the Knight of Dawn? The Dawn Knight?!

What kind of cringy-ahhh name and title is that?!

Like okay man, I get that you're being emotionally manipulated by Mr. Humpty Dumpty fatty pants WHOSE NAME WAS EVEN MENTIONED.

"Henrick Istvan" more like a Hen-ick isn't van. Simply disgusting.

You just have to applaud the author's skill for writing horrible characters.

Manipulator, ugly, fat (not fat-shaming he's just that ugly and fat), too ambitious, etc etc etc.

The Knight of Dawn - you're just calling him KOD cause why not - life was absolute hell.

For this guy and his guy, he fought the faes. He went head on to fight the faes and battle in the war as the war commander on the first lines.

He fought, trained, sharpened his weapon, cut down his enemies, maybe some spicy times with his wife, but that was all.

His personality was so...

He forgave Humpty Dumpty for disrespecting and guilt tripping him so many times, so much that you would puke rainbows and sunshines like he was in the story by now!

Classic "too kind and innocent" main character.

All in all, that book was absolutely shit. It was so repetitive, yet you couldn't stop myself from clicking the next chapter.

Well, you suppose there was another reason too, and that said reason was how the chapter flipped to the faes point of view every few chapters.

They were.. much, much, much crueller than the KOD.

But it was natural, knowing they were the villains in the story.

Yet your heart couldn't help but to get drawn to them every word, dynamic, expression and behaviour they said and did.

You may have gotten obsessed with the right hand man of the main villain herself, but switching topics...

And what came next was absolutely jaw-dropping. And not in a good way.

After the tanks came, soon they made a bomb.

A BOMB.

A LITERAL, ACTUAL, BOMB.

And of course, the enemies were wiped out.

The book ended anticlimactically.

The buildup, the plot devices, everything!

All gone.

Man, what was the author thinking?!

And then the story ended there.

RIGHT THEN AND THERE.

From that, you had gotten SO ANGRY that your blood pressure spiked, and-

...

...

...am I dreaming?

This is an unfamiliar ceiling.

A/N: dear souls, stay tuned for part 2! Thank you for reading if you read.

[usedpidemo]

Update - 3rd year anniversary! (and some future plans, a reflection, etc.)

Hi everyone! π here.

By the time this post is up, it'll be the 13th of May. Three years since I began my writing journey and this Tumblr blog. Three years. Time flies by so fast. I was close to graduating senior high after it was delayed because pandemic, had my graduation in an empty room basically, now I'm hitting my third year of college. Crazy stuff.

With that said, here are the stats + timetable of the blog so far:

First work: Sandwich (Wendy) (published 05/13/21, 4:03 a.m)

Highest note count: Tell your friends (Yujin x Wonyoung) (published 01/14/23, 1274 notes)

Number of works published: 91 fics (1 fic every 12.03 days)

500 followers: June 18, 2021 (36 days)

1000 followers: October 12, 2021 (152 days)

2000 followers: June 18, 2022 (401 days)

3000 followers: November 12, 2022 (548 days)

4000 followers: May 22, 2023 (740 days)

5000 followers: December 18, 2023 (950 days)

Current follower count: 5615 (1 new follower every 5.12 days)

It's been a hectic final month of college, so I apologize for the lack of activity in recent times :< But summer is coming up very soon, so hopefully I'll have all the time in the world to write more till then! I will say, a new fic is on the near horizon, so please be on the lookout!

I would like to take the opportunity to thank every single of you, whether reader, lurker, or a fellow writer for your support! Especially during these lull times, your unwavering support has kept me afloat and has been a motivation in continuing to write. Love you guys as always. Here's to another fruitful year <3

From this point, this part will be an overall reflection and life summary of the previous year, my thoughts on some personal matters, and some ideas I've been contemplating. If you don't wanna read this, you can stop here.

I miss 2023 quite a bit, not gonna lie. I know nostalgia can quickly grow warm and fuzzy, seeing the past through rose tinted lens, but I'll admit that 2024 hasn't been off to the start I envisioned it to be. That year was mostly peak for me, and I could even argue it's my favorite year to live out based on all my experiences. Traveling to new places, finally attending live events, interacting with my K-pop biases, and so on—it really felt like the best was yet to come with how 2023 flowed and transitioned into the new year.

Five months in, and I am struggling. Horribly. Most plans, dreams, and ideas have gone up in smoke, and it's just one devastating gut punch after another. I have a shitty professor in one major that basically made me check out of that class, and I don't know my family will react when I tell them I have to repeat said class because that professor was a dick. My family's been infighting on a daily basis, and I'm mostly collateral damage to them. Not one week can go by without some serious confrontation between them. There was a brief health scare with my mother, but that seems to be a nothing matter; thank God she'll be okay.

All this just makes life so deflating, in all honesty. I get that no life is without struggle, but I genuinely don't know when we'll be in the clear. Not anytime soon, I reckon. In these tough times, there's very little comfort except the past, when everything was pretty all right for the most part. It's been demotivating to write when mom comes forward with another grievance with my sister. It's hard to write when you have a professor who likes to power trip their students into submission. It's hard when you don't know how to admit to your mother that he failed his one class because of said power tripping professor.

But that doesn't mean I will let it eat me alive. I know we've been through some utter lows in the past. And we always get back up. If no one has us, then God does.

Summer break is fast approaching and I want to fix things. Even in my own little way. I know none of what I'm saying has anything to do with writing degenerate stories about hot K-pop idols, but real life circumstances have definitely affected me more than I can brush off. I should be calm, unfazed, undeterred.

After all, some stories are meant to be finished. They just take a more unconventional route. Ask Cody.

With all that being said, I will finish these commissions over the next two months. I'm really sorry to everyone who requested and paid for their stories months and months ago; I genuinely feel bad for not getting these out on time, but I am very mindful of quality control, and I have no one to blame but myself for being a slacker and lazy worker. Despite my feelings, I should remain professional—that's what being a worker means.

A lifestyle overhaul is definitely in my list of things to improve over the summer too. Figuring out how to get writing done, finding ways to alleviate my PokeRogue addiction (GOTY), whilst having a healthy work/life balance and not losing my sanity over it. Or worse, burning out.

And I want to take this opportunity to thank all my friends—peach, caps, majorblinks, chunk, frisky, raf, c.o, levi, sins, iz, ken, v1n, ddeun, notions, kevin, eros, brandon, kaede, svn, frisky, cray, rpg, prael—for putting up with my shit for another year. This life is tough, but you guys make it tolerable. Thank you for letting me air out my grievances even when it wasn't the best time to. I pray that when everything passes, I'm able to repay you all in some shape or form generously.

And to you, dear reader, for making it this far, thank you. Whether you've been with me since day one, or day 1094, as a commenter, reposter, liking, or just passing by/lurking, thank you for giving me a chance. Without you, all of this would have been for nothing. I don't know where I would be now if I didn't take that chance, that leap of faith back in 2021, and it's because of you I am able to keep doing this for the love of the game.

With grace,

Peter / π

[rins-batcave]

I’ve finally decide to make and intro post!!!

I’m Rin or Ria (or Batman), I like a lot so stuff but especially reading and indie music.

I go by any pronouns but mainly they/he/she. I’m gender fluid/queer, asexual and aroflux.

I like being called mostly masc terms (boy, handsome etc.) but I also like being called a doll and pretty so I kinda just fuck with everything.

I’m up late a lot, kinda inconsistent with my posting, scared of rain/storms, needles and spiders, and I swear a fuck ton.

I am an age. (But Fr 1000000000 years old) !!Minor!!

Here's pronouns page: https://en.pronouns.page/@_Rin-

Other Accounts:

Vent 1 - @rinbowroses

Vent 2 - @i-hate-myself-love-that

Writing - @rinwritiesbutitssecret

Diary - @rins-diary-entries.

Poetry - @rins-poetry-blog

If you want my 6th or 7th account msg me

If you want my discord msg me :3

Rules:

- Don’t be an asshole

I don't use many tags, but #shitty poetry is all my poetry :3

I’m very interested in writing, good omens, the osemanverse, good kid, dayglow, anything queer and some (not horrible) mcyts.

I’m an INTP-A personality type

Send me messages please, I’m extremely bored.

NOTICE: Recently I’ve gotten a lot of asks for donations. I’d like to ask people for refrain from sending me these kind of asks as sadly, I’m really not in the position to donate and it really stresses me out

Here’s my moots board, I update it sometimes but it could be outdated

Below the cut is a list of my current interests:

Music:

Dayglow

Wallows

Vacations

Clairo

Last dinosaurs

Good kid

Ricky Montgomery

High sunn

Rex orange county

Rare occasions

Rare Americans

Vansire

Yungblood

Beach Bunny

Cave town

The drums

Baby Queen

I’ll stop listing here for the sake of time

Books:

Anything Alice Oseman

Hell followed with us

Anything queer really

Good omens

Movies/TV:

A good girls guide to murder

Heartstopper

Young royals

Heartbreak high

Fandoms:

Osemanverse

Mcyt sometimes

[some-thrilling-heroics]

shadowheart and halsin

so. the thing that i don't get (aside from the meta reason of 'they didn't write that in or record any lines' etc) is shadowheart and halsin in act 2 BEFORE she goes and spares the life of you know who

there are some jabs from halsin abt her yapping and reciting lessons like a student without understanding what she's saying and i know he is proud of her when she rejects shar, but before all that, i feel a distinct lack of conflict

shadowheart is perfectly happy to put her knife to lae'zel's throat and that whole thing where you can take sides and it's all bc the artifact she carries is for shar, that's her holy mission (plus she hates the gith on top of that)

why is there no similarly visible conflict between her and halsin when the setting is ripe for it? i would expect some comments abt helping him lift the curse - kinda like astarion says to fuck off and not expect his help with the gnome slaves (you can still have him in the party but he does complain abt us helping them) - and it could just be 'do not involve me in this, if he wants to waste his time going against the dark lady then that's his choice, but he will pay the price eventually' and then you don't have her in the party when you clearly are working to help him with the curse. also that comment he has on the old battle field when he sees the corpses - shadowheart could go 'that's what happens to enemies of lady shar. you should take note and stop your foolish quest' or some minor passive aggressive quips abt futility of it all.

now, i know shadowheart is a shitty sharran XD sure, but even with that in mind she does have a vibe of a pupil that is trying very hard for approval still and i think that would work for me as a motivator when there's nothing else to it. and i do think that she could be conflicted deep inside when she sees the effects of the shadow curse, but at least for the first half of act 2, maybe before the gauntlet she would outwardly not show that imo (plus then she does apparently share her doubts at the gauntlet, not that i ever saw that in game myself)

as for halsin. eh, on one hand he has zero issue with a vampire or a bhaalspawn and all that but imo a sharran would feel more personal than a random undead 🤔but afaik there's not much there.

perhaps he doesn't sees shadowheart as much of a threat (as, again, she is patently a very crappy sharran), but more a misguided person that needs patience to guide them away from a bad path. maybe he sees her internal conflict? i wouldn't expect him do that thing he does with minthara where it's either him or her bc he just wants to be anywhere but around minthara bc it's unsafe - but wouldn't seeing shadowheart's armor / regalia bring back bad memories? he's seen people wearing similar vestiges do horrible things. i think he would be very wary of her at least for the remainder of act 1 since joining the tadfools before he gets ....idk i don't want to say comfortable but idk.

once again, comments? thoughts? XD

[roeyliteratiforever]

So if your looking at things from Jess' pov his mom just kicked him out to live with his uncle he barely knows, he has a lady he's just meeting for the first time talking to him about how she knows what he's going through and to him it feels condescending even if it wasn't meant that way by Lorelai. He doesn't want to be in Stars Hollow initially so he starts acting out to test how quickly he could get sent back such as stealing garden noms...etc, then he meets a girl who shares the same interests as him and the only person in town so far that doesn't automatically treat him like a preconceived opinion about him and she makes him feel comfortable so he proceed to impress his crush with writing notes in her book margins (that says I want you to know me) and pulls pranks that would make her laugh to then learn she has a boyfriend and learn that he is beloved by her mother that loathes him.

Dean does all the "perfect boyfriend things" while being a possessive, explosive, and an emotionally abusive control freak. Jess only wants to then spend more time with her, but the whole town already thinks he is trouble because of the reputation he set for himself.

He gets into a car accident with Rory and people then act like he's the spawn of Satan. He becomes so anxious and feels so bad after the accident that he leaves town because he doesn't want to cause Rory any harm or get harm from the weirdo townies. When she comes for him in New York he gets this burst of hope in him which is why he decides to move back for the possibility of being with Rory.

After Rory kissed him the first time he was so gone for her and in that moment that was all he wanted. He genuinely thought she was going to break up with Dean and choose to be with him, but when she didn't and left instead (my boy who already has deep abandonment wounds) is hurt because she didn't outright choose him and left. He then was alone without the one person in that town that he wanted to be around and so he met Shane who didn't want anything serious so it was a perfect way to try to mask his pain with her. He mysteriously gets a car, and people are going nuts thinking he stole it, and he's thinking I can't even get a second job without people thinking I'm a criminal, and I can't get a second job without people accusing me of being a drug dealer or a stripper.

Once him and Rory get together he is so happy he doesn't want to mess it up with her and he gets nervous because he wants everything to go right. She's the one he's been waiting for and now he has her. Then her ex boyfriend starts stalking and harassing him in secret and he feels like he can't do anything about it, and can't even tell his girlfriend about it because he thinks she won't believe her if he told her, so he bottles it up. When he gets attacked by the swan and she thought he got in a fight with Dean and didn't believe him it really hurt him. (I don't blame Rory for this she had no way of knowing and Dean was being manipulative with his "nice guy" and shitty behaviors but it still hurt Jess none the less.) After that he begins to put up his walls again.

When he realizes he's been messing up after not calling he then starts trying to do better and set dates and plans to be with her. All he wants to do is make her happy at this point. Then he gets the news that he's not graduating and in that moment it feels like everything everyone had always said about him came true, he felt like a failure and knowing that he wasn't going to be able to keep his promise to Rory that he would take her to prom crushed him. He wanted so badly to be there for her and do all the boyfriend things and he was so afraid of telling her he wasn't graduating and so upset he couldn't keep his promise to her. His smart girlfriend was getting into an ivy league school and he wasn't even going to graduate highschool and the thought of telling her that was horrible to him.

He could feel he was losing her and he thought once he told her that it would be over, and ended up messing things up with her anyways. He felt like he was doing her a favor by leaving because he figured she would want him gone. He didn't think she would want him to stay, even though that's all she wanted. He was battling his demons alone and was used to everyone shipping him off when he messed up that he thought he was doing her a favor by leaving after he messed up so bad.

His father that left him as a baby showed up in his life for the first time and he didn't know how to handle that. Once Luke kicked him out he ran to his dad that left him because crashing on his couch or floor was better than staying with his neglectful deadbeat mother.

He finds out his uncle was hiding his car from him and felt double betrayed he was already feeling abandoned yet again after Luke kicked him out to then find out he took something he worked so hard to get from him he was more betrayed. He comes back to Stars Hollow to get his car and everyone still wants him gone. Luke tells Jess to stay away from Rory so he proceeds trying to avoid her while he is there and he knows how badly he messed up with her and he wants to talk to her but when he sees her at the firelight festival he wants to explain to her but she is still so mad and all he could get out was that he loves her. He just wanted her to know he then leaves because he doesn't expect her to say anything he just wanted her to know. Jess is deeply hurting at this point inside and his pain is at it's peak. He just keeps digging a deeper whole and doesn't know how to fix it at this point.

Luke convinces Jess to go to his neglectful mother's wedding and goes to a bachelor party where he is assaulted by his stepdad to be at a bar and he naturally goes into defense mode. He was so used to his other abusive step dad's that he was constantly in defense mode and fought back. He goes to his mother's wedding anyways and walks her down the isle despite everything his mom put him through. Luke gives him the self help book that he had been reading, and Jess reads it and tries to better himself as well, meanwhile Lorelai scoffs to Luke about it. (I love Lorelai but that was extremely uncalled for by her and it just makes me think no matter what he does or how better he becomes he will always resent him, and it just makes no sense that she has this one sided grudge with a kid that was deeply in pain.) He makes up with Luke and thanks him for everything he did for him, and then he goes to try to apologize and tell Rory how he feels, but then he sees Dean there and he is thrown off and he just wants to make things right so in the spur of the moment he asks her to leave with him because he just wants to fix what they had. (He wasn't thinking rationally, but he meant it when he said she could count on him now and so he went out and turned his life around and made something for himself and came back to show her how much she could count him now even if it meant as a friend. He would still be there for her and he showed her that he could be the person she always knew he was. He still didn't expect anything from her he just wanted to show her his book, and let her know he couldn't have done it without her.)

He was so badly traumatized while him and Rory were together and it couldn't have possibly worked out at that time. He was battling so much pain internally, and everyone in that town was against him and actively hating him 😭 and I just feel for what he was going through, and I'm just so proud of who he turned out to be. I'm not sure what this rant was anymore but I'm just thinking about Jess' perspective and his pain right now. He was in so much pain while him and Rory were together and he didn't know how to properly express that or tell her that, and I just want to hug him and I'm so proud of him for how far he came and how much he overcame his pain and trauma and ugh I just feel so much right now. (Also I had a lot of coffee today and my autistic/ADHD brain is just going with thoughts right now.)

[twiniverse]

Just to give it its own post, because it's important enough to warrant it:

I'm not "the person choosing the give the finger to people who need accessibility tools". I have not once said that people can't write ids on my posts. I didn't say I wouldn't look into having someone else do it. I said that I can't do it, that it is not my job, and that a certain someone's attitude is foul and that makes people less likely to want to do what they say.

I also have not thrown a little hissy fit because someone isn't doing what I want. I haven't literally told anyone that I wouldn't leave them alone until they did what I wanted them to do. I haven't used several different accounts and ips to evade being blocked in order to angrily yell about how superior I am to everyone else in the fandom, or to belittle anyone. I haven't gone to the side account of someone who has blocked me to continue my tantrum there.

I don't have a problem with accessibility, or with people who volunteer their time to give access to more people. Believe it or not, accessibility is something I'm highly dedicated to and something I am often finding new ways to implement in my actual job. My team is implementing on-site image blockers on the user side so they don't have to see things that upset them. We're making sure our on-site games aren't going to be triggering people's vertigo. We're making sure there are colour themes so that no one has to choose between blinding white light or blinding white letters, but the people who do like those options will have them, too! We're implementing high contrast mode! Our head coder is blind, in fact. We'll be working with her quite a bit to make the site- which is visual based- still accessible for those with screen readers and other aids. She has a braille display, isn't that cool? I didn't even know those were a thing until she told me.

My problem is specifically with the person who has not only harassed me, but other people in the fandom. My problem is specifically with the person who outright admitted that their reaction to being told "no" is to become aggressive and condescending. My problem is specifically with the person who thinks they're the only person who gives a damn. My problem is with the person who says that they don't have to do it, that they're volunteering their time because they care, but also says it's their job and we need to let them do it. My problem is with the person who speaks on behalf of others who do not want to be spoken for. My problem is specifically with the person who told me that they would continue harassing me unless I met their demands. My problem is specifically with the person who will read a fraction of what I actually said here and will respond with how horrible of a human I am because I focus on accessibility with my actual job and not my fancomic that I barely have the energy to work on in the first place.

My problem is specifically with the person who read everything I said and instead of recognising and accepting that they're the only one I have a problem with decided to start attacking me and accusing me of being ableist because they, and no one else, have pissed me off.

As I said to begin with, I blocked them because of their attitude and the way they harass people. The way they've harassed my friends, the way they've harassed people I don't like, the way they've harassed newbies, etc, etc. It had nothing to do with IDs, and it still doesn't. I blocked a shitty person, and that person made an assumption and is throwing a hissy fit about it. That's all there is to it. The bottom line is that genuinely anyone can add id's to my posts except for that specific person because I don't want that specific person interacting with me.

This next bit is for you, that specific person: "-but you blocked me after writing a single image description for your posts, for some stupid reason." It was not a stupid reason. And like I said in my response, it had nothing to do with you writing an image description for my post. It's because you're a foul, slimy little cockroach with a superiority complex. You think you're the hero but you're the villain here.

So, again, as disrespectfully as possible: Fuck. Off.

[mrstsung]

Alan Lee's shang tsung, you deserve a better narrative and script.

😔 *sigh*

I just hate the story this shang was in. If it wasn't for bad plot. And horrible direction.

This could have been an amazing young/early sorcerer days shang tsung.

Like I'm just sad the more that i think about it.

Like the bad plot,plot holes,simple solutions to a problem that isn't really that much of a problem,the character favoritism,etc.

God,shang,im so sorry.

Mr. Alan Lee,i feel if the script wasn't crap,the narrative didn't screw you over,and this game wasn't filled with useless microtransactions,and shitty gameplay. You would have been a perfect successor.

But sadly. It's not ment to be.

I personally feel if he was given a chance to bring his shang tsung to life more,make him actually intimidating,and add oomph to it. Then i feel like he could shine. Like i just feel he's held back. Like get angry dude! Genuinely,get pissed off! Make shang scary. And not in the cunning sense like they seem to shoehorn him into. Like yes that is a facet of his character,but only one small part. Shang is complex. And so should be his energy and expression. Like i feel mr. Lee was scared doing shang. But excited too going by his interviews. But i feel he was so worried a out disappointment,that he got blindsided by the bad writing. If i had a chance to write something for him. I would in a heartbeat. Give him a better narrative and story for his shang tsung.

I would absolutely looooove to write for mortal kombat. At very least shang tsungs part. And idc if it's "canon" or not. I just want a good story. That treats shang as the badass we KNOW he is. *sigh* alas i have to only share with my fellow shang tsimps. Not that that's all bad. I love you guys.

But i really really wish that alan Lee's shang was done better. I dont mind his voice,aesthetics,i just hate the writing.

I wanna give him a hug and take him away from this horrible version of the game and series.

Me at all shang tsung's: "my heart n soul sir"

[l1tw1ck]

got a reply on ao3 where someone was being ableist to me by using dyslexic is an insult, so I told them that was ableist and then they said "not liking your writing isn't ableist" (i never said it was) and then proceeded to use the r slur and then said "i could tell you're autistic."

so in order to fight the ableist allegation...you use more ableist rhetoric...i see 🤔

laughably ironic

rambling under the cut bc it's just ... hilarious

i wasn't gonna say anything about it on here bc it's not worth thinking about it any further than necessary but i just have to say something bc it's so funny to me.

i wish people knew how to insult me and talk about my work negatively without being ableist, racist, transphobic, etc. like, i'd rather not get any rude comments at all but if you're gonna be a dick at least be ethical about it 😭 how are you gonna READ a fic including things you DON'T like and then insult me over it?! why do people do this?!

i honestly can't be upset by this kind of thing because it's just so hard to take them seriously. people just sling slurs at me thinking it'll hurt me but it doesn't, because I know they're only doing it because they feel comfortable doing it online anonymously. if they were really about it they'd say it on their main account, but they don't.

it's hard to fully articulate my feelings and thoughts on this but man...reading their replies made me cringe

nobody has to like my writing or the type of content I create, i really don't care about that. especially because i don't even like my older work anyway (the fic in question is 2 yrs old). my writing style and skills are the way they are because I'm disabled and struggled throughout school because of it, not liking the way I write or thinking i'm not highly skilled isn't ableist. using ableist rhetoric and slurs is. i write purely for fun and i don't care if someone hates it because it's not like i'm trying to submit these to like...the new york times 😭

everyone has a right to feel disgusted or uncomfortable with my work, i'm not gonna cry about it or call them a "puriteen" (god i hate that term). but if you're gonna waste your time and energy reading my fics and then insult me about it, at least hold back on the slurs and bigoted language. insult me all you want but don't use my identity as a marginalized person to do it

oh my god i just remembered they also said i should give up on being an author bc my writing is terrible. Who the hell is reading smut fanfic and expecting shakespeare????? it's porn! porn is known for being shitty. it's the equivalent of opening up a video on pornhub and expecting an A24 level of production 😭 i'm an adult with a personal life, what do i look like emulating the skills and stylings of mark twain or jane austen for PORN? for free no less! 😭😭 ppl tend to forget that part

full respect to people who actually do write really fancy stuff for smut fics cause I don't have the energy for all that 😭 or even the skills honestly. i'm currently trying to make up for the train wreck that was high school (major depressive episode for FOUR years)

i'm ranting (i have a tendency to ramble...writer's curse) but man, i really hate how acceptable it is for people to say these kinds of things online. In the past, people would lose their jobs and scholarships for being bigoted but now you can just open up twitter on a new account/logged out and you'll see plenty of people saying horrible things (and getting PAID for it!) It's like a reverse of 2020, people were overly scared of being "canceled" and now everyone is comfortable using slurs against people. sigh.

like i said, insult me ethically!

anyways i'm gonna keep writing crappy fics ☺️ progress is slow but i'm still writing!

[dootznbootz]

I know we love our morally gray characters. But the internet kinda ruined Circe for me.

Let me explain.

I remember I actually used to really like Circe's character when I first read the Odyssey last year. I loved her as a "helpful antagonist type" character.

But what ruined her character for me was everybody calling her a "girlboss" or just simping for her in a way? But they completely disregard the fact she technically raped a man. (But no one cares about that because male SA victims never get taken seriously, especially in media smh)

Now, I can never experience Circe as the same character because all I see is a terrible person being glorified because of her gender. And then people say double standards don't exist!

Which I hate cause she's a genuinely cool character. (From a writing standpoint)

Circe isn't a bad character let me be clear (in the Odyssey anyway. Cough cough Madeline Mil-) But I just hate how people romanticize her completely ignoring her terrible actions. And to think it's all just because she's a "hot badass female".

And this isn't just about Odysseus either, there's literally a myth where she tries to seduce a man, but when he remains faithful she turns him into a woodpecker-

People can like her CHARACTER, however, they should still acknowledge her bad actions too and hold her accountable. If we can all agree it's shitty what Zeus did to a bunch of women, we can also agree what Circe did to Odysseus was shitty.

Women sexually assaulting men is just as inhumane as vice versa and we have to stop turning a blind eye about it, even if it's fictional.

And I feel like people WOULD actually hold her accountable if she was a male character. Which makes me even more angry.

Maybe this is just a me thing, but I just can't fawn over a character and call them hot when they've done something as bad as some of the things Circe has done.

So, I guess what you could get out of this-

Please stop romanticizing circe.

Hold her accountable as you would any other character.

Don't be so forgiving just because you find her attractive.

Anyways, thank you for coming to my Ted talk and sorry for ranting

honestly yeah, all of this.

I sadly had to block Circe's tag on tumblr because it pisses me off how much people glorify her and/shittalk Odysseus with it. (I trust my friends when they have Circe content lol)

I love Circe as well. She's such an interesting and fun character but how people twist her just fucks with me so much. Also to make HER a victim just for girlbossness? What's so girlboss about having such a horrific thing happen to you?

I said it in a different post but you can thirst for Circe without making fun of her victim. People will call a victim of rape a manwhore or a slut as if what happened to him was a grand ol time. It's genuinely disturbing. He is shown to have PTSD from it (in my opinion) in the Odyssey. This book is ancient and yet it captures that better than anything I've read.

Odysseus isn't necessarily a wholesome, "goody-to-shoes" man. He does a lot of awful things. That doesn't mean that the suffering he went through is suddenly negated.

Even bringing up stuff with female characters, the fact that people will water them down so then they're not "problematic" pisses me off. Women can be horrible, even good women. Penelope is my fave but she's pretty awful in many ways.

Evidence will be right in front of people and they won't care. Crying, begging to go, fear, avoidance, numbness, etc. There'll be excuses anyway. "He's a guy, he's fine with it." "Men are sex crazed, especially back then." "He didn't try hard enough." "He should be grateful."

Honestly? What saddens me the most is that I don't think people will ever really understand what happened or even WANT to because they have their own idea in their head and refuse to see it for what it is. I mean Hades game did it too. It's really sad.

Circe and him weren't fwb. They weren't lovers. What about "heart full of grim forebodings" screams love? He wanted to save his friends and go home.

[stromuprisahat]

Though compared to other characters and ships in the books, do you think that darklina could be called toxic from both parties (Aleksander + Alina)? Sorry if this offense anyone I only read the first book.

First of all- fuck offending people. Fiction is written to be discussed among other things and asking a question without ill intent should never be something to be afraid of.

As for the matter at hand- yes, absolutely.

There's plenty written on how did Aleksander wrong Alina and although most of it could be chalked up to caution, strategy and having to deal with mentally damaged girl necessary for his plans alongside more pressing matters like war and incompetent leadership. It's undeniable his feelings got involved, so he hardly remained simply cold and calculating.

He's also a petty bitch, who won't let an offense against himself and his goals slide, if he is in position to take revenge. (See: Genya's punishment, Nikolai's volcralization, partly burning that Saintsdamned orphanage..) Plus he knows words don't cost him anything, but often could work as well as actions (threatening to skin Alina, kill Grishenka etc.).

The main issue is that neither Alina, not plenty of readers see the difference between Alina as a person and her as a strategically important figure, later a leader and figurehead of part of his opposition. Or cannot grasp that a single action rarely has just one purpose with the Darkling.

For example burning that orphanage isn't necessary to prove how far he's willing to go- Alina already sees him as evil incarnate-, but it:

Destroys symbol of the past Alina keeps clinging to, even though it's holding her back.

Destroys one of few things she truly cared for.

Lures her out of hiding, so at least the Civil war can end.

Frees Alina from her shitty mother figure.

Settles the score of dead horrible women that kept damaging their "children" even from afar. And no, I won't cry for Anne Cunt any more than for Ol' Bags.

The other way around is often overlooked. Partly because Aleksander's viewed as a heartless monster by plenty of people, partly because he's the bad guy AND a ("white powerful") man, so he "cannot be abused", especially not by the heroine, from whose POV we see the story unfold.

Aleksander's only role model regarding long lasting relationships is his toxic mother, so he treats harm as affection, therefore we never see him complain, but let's be fair- if he were the one promising Alina to join her, only to proceed trying to kill them both through her powers, he'd be judged for it even more than he already is.

Alina from the first book never saw him as a human being. She found him attractive- yes-, but denied him something as basic as ability to have feelings. and once a salvation in a form of older female figure with puritan attitudes appears, Alina embraces her lies as a word of God, and immediately flees from him, never to stop and think about wider consequences of her sudden disappearance. Her dehumanization of him in the tent scene is quite something.

Alina from following books has fleeing moments of empathy, only to slide back into her "Evil man-needs to be destroyed" attitude. She feels ashamed of wanting him, she finds funny the notion he might've been sexually assaulted, she never considers his points or losses. There's probably more, but this already got longer than I intended, so I'll drop a link to my tag on their interactions I write as I go through the books.

While his unhealthy treatment of her is a combination of centuries of losses, damage caused by narcissistic mother and desperation of a cornered leader, hers of him is about bigotry, shame and will to be responsibility-free no matter the cost.

It's rather ironic, that he keeps trying to teach her- even though it's often the "tough love" he was taught at Baghra's knee-, while she uses "wisdom" of the same woman as ear plugs

Actually, the only truly nice action from her side I can think of is her honoring his last wish.