#shit I write

[unicornsandgenocide]

uh i wrote a poem idk

hope you like it?

it kinda sucks…

[hotteststar]

hi guys so that's a poem i wrote bout ummmm feelings ig???? i feel like I haven't explained well the um feelings?? so like pls help me idk how to say things idk how to talk idk how to write i just don't know man

FLOWERS

I'm dead.

i'm dead and i'm here,

i'm walking, i'm breathing, i'm looking,

i'm touching, i'm loving and i'm hating.

i'm waiting, i'm fearing and i'm crying.

And i'm dead.

Because i'm just like those flowers

the ones all around me right now

they're all pretty, all cute, all fine.

But it's not the kind of pretty flowers

that you decide to look growing

waiting and observing them until their death.

They are the kind of flowers that you pick

you kill them, hold them in your hands

watch as they slowly pass away.

And you smile,

because they still look pretty

still look cute, still look fine.

So here we are, I'm already dead

i just haven't lose my colors yet

like those flowers when you pick them.

They look alive but it's just fake

they seem fine but that's not true

they keep faking to be okay.

They don't show you their pain

they just silently accept that

they're already dead.

There's nothing they can do

and they must wait until they lose

all the life that dwell inside of them

to see people accpeting that

they are actually dead.

R.A.B.

[miss-celestia13]

Diabolical Desire

Aylin doesn’t play the victim—she’s the predator, leaving a bloody trail in her wake. Hunting her next kill online, she matches with Cole, a dangerously seductive man with his own insidious secret. Together, they deliver brutal justice and outrun the law, fueled by a savage, scorching shared desire.

For two people who see love as nothing more than a weakness, there are only two possible endings: wedding bells or a coffin. Either way, Aylin’s hooked on the dark pleasure Cole gives her—and she’ll do whatever it takes to keep it.

Published on Inkitt, Ao3, and Wattpad 🥰 a snippet can be found below the cut.

Diabolical Desire https://www.inkitt.com/stories/erotica/1349014

I’ve been writing this to help get myself out of the perfectionist, over-editing hell I put myself in with my fanfics this year. I made myself miserable, and this absurdly silly smutty story has been helping loads. It’s just unhinged and so much fun to write. I am hopeful I can return to my fics soon, without falling back into the trap I’d set for myself, but until then, I’ll be here 🥰❤️

That dense forest, eerie and silent, cloaked her as she sauntered under its organic canopy. Part of her wanted to call out for the big bad wolf to come out and play as she dodged smacking branches, and the freshly rained on soil filled her nose with its scent. These hidden gem towns where everyone knew everyone else were her bread and butter. Cities offered anonymity.

She used them when necessary. But the people she went after, the bad and the pure wicked, they thrived in these towns and she did her best work in them. She liked this one now that she was on her way to meet Cole and would think fondly of her time here. She hummed as she walked, content to wander the never-ending woods for now.

Silver ribbons of moonlight streamed through the foliage and fluttered across the dirt path strewn with amber and scarlet leaves ahead of her. The temperature dropped and dropped as she brushed against boughs and skirted around a thick patch of stinging nettles. The wind picked up to toss her hair around.

Fall’s oncoming sigh lifted the fine, pale hair on her nape and legs as she’d forgone tights, and only wore skimpy lace underwear beneath her skirt. She already knew how this night would end and wanted nothing to impede it.

Her filthy thoughts accompanied her as she followed the slowly rising sound of rushing water. It began as a rumbling hiss in the distance, as though some invisible basilisk slithered through the dark brown tree trunks splattered with weaving, moon thrown shadows. Soon, it was a thundering crash of splashing water as she broke through a towering group of bristling pine trees and the waterfall came into view.

Crystalline water poured from a gaping rock maw and into a deep shimmering pool she would have swum in as a child before people who should’ve been better had ripped from her hands her innocence.

Now, she only imagined drowning those people in it. She was alone here. She sensed no one else and knew he wouldn’t show himself until he was ready. Waiting it was then.

Aylin sank back amongst the pines, took her phone from her pocket and sent Cole a message. She played her part well. She was positive he had no clue that she’d figured him out. He wouldn’t see it coming.

Lilith: Ready when you are. I want what you promised me.

She grinned, broad and relaxed as Cole’s chat bubble instantly appeared and she drank in his words like a nicotine addict sucking their brown stained fingernails for a weak fix when the tobacco ran out.

Cole: You’ll get whatever I give you.

Lilith: What should I do while I wait?

A minute passed. Anticipation and irritation built inside her and she was gritting her teeth by the time he responded.

Cole: Nothing. Do as you’re told and wait. You’re pissing me off.

She smothered a pleased smile. A flash of heat in her chest that trickled down, down, down to settle in her core banished the night’s creeping cold. Aylin couldn’t resist needling him, knew it would make the pain burn all the sweeter once he fucked her.

Lilith: Are you even worth waiting for?

[maihonhassan]

Ask a brown girl about her past relationship and she will say;

“Pagal thi main”

[captain-grammar]

I trace my finger lightly across his skin, drawing constellations using the freckles on his arms as anchor points; dark stars on a pale canvas that’s just as beautiful as anything in the heavens.

[unknownoro]

This’ll most likely be the last time, if I deactivate again i’m hopefully never back

[lex-confessions]

I didn’t know I was selfish until my mother told me so. I didn’t know I was ungrateful until my mother told me so. I didn’t know I was a bitch until my mother told me so. I didn’t know I was aimless until my mother told me so. I didn’t know I was weak until my mother told me so. There used to be a time where I told me so.

- ls

[supermightyglue]

do your jackass/cky/dickhouse girls coexist? and if they do, what's the dynamics between them?

HI sorry this is so late im bad at maintaining shit + life is rough lol

but yeah they do! not all of them tho—dickhouse girl nd main cast member are independent in their own lil universes (as of rn .. i have a few more ocs i havent posted ab that might chill w/ them) but dunn’s sister + cky girl coexist!!

their relationship is very much golden retriever x strange untrained mutt

dunn’s sister knew all the guys + cky gal growing up ofc but during those teen years she wasnt as present with them as she is in adulthood

she just had her own friends outside of them. she only decided she liked hanging w/ them AFTER high school, espec cuz she was a lil younger than bam & co

she always saw them tho & picked up lil things from ryan cuz she adores him so certain mannerisms we’re just collateral

then she kinda (easily) assimilated into the actual group nd instantly knew cky girl was meant to be her best friend

now our cky girl lowkey had a crush on her LMAO

even tho theyre VERY different nd lady dunn was oblivious af. it lasted for a good year or two nd ended some months after she got closer with their group

but circa jackass eras, theyre finally besties

we got cky gal wearing lady dunn’s lil bracelets nd always having an extra hair tie for her

meanwhile dunn always makes sure she has food for her & leaves notes/reminders for her all the time

and tbh theyre useless but cky girlie saves every single one nd reads them when shes down

they share clothes too! like usually its just stuff like i said that she’ll be wearing dunns bracelets but at sleepovers she’ll take her clothes too or accidentally swap something and then forget it wasnt theirs to begin with

speaking of, lots of sleepovers! theyre always at dunns apartment because tbh we dont know if cky girl even has a permanent residence

so dunn used to always try nd convince her to move in her spare room. she gave up when she realized 1.) no use cuz she wont and 2.) if she did, shed probably let bam and them in when she wasnt home soooo yeah no

they have so much fun getting high together. its either super chill nd cky gal is jamming on her bass while dunn just vibes or theyre silly af

dunn is the best wingwoman ever but also ppl confuse the two of them as a couple a LOT

cuz theyre too close nd dunn is a touchy clingy person and even tho cky girl isnt, she is completely desensitized to dunn hanging on her arm or being up in her face because thats just how she is

but they dont gaf nd roll with it when someone thinks that. usually they laugh so much that ppl realize their mistake

and whenever she remembers dunn simps over knoxville she wants to gag

but finding out dunn used to have a thing for bam? oh she LAUGHEDDDD and didnt stop .. ever tbh

theyre just the cutest gfs besties ever nd i’ll probably post more about them in the future mayb even a moodboard

[inbabylontheywept]

bad dating stories time: the shoe incident

so in highschool, my best friend wasnt allowed to go on dates unless there was another couple there to keep an eye on him. part of this was his parents being insane, but also, part of it was him being insane. in a problem with no reasonable parties, there are no reasonable solutions.

at some point in my junior year, my sorta-gf broke up with me, and i just wasnt feeling dating, which was bad for my friend, because he had a good thing going with a girl he met in court.

he kind of hounded me about it. kept pushing me to just put me feet back in the dating pool and i wasnt real thrilled about it, because i knew he was pushing me for his own benefit, not mine, so i kept telling him to fuck off, and after a few weeks of being told that i would date when i was damn well ready, he eventually said: okay. what if i paid for the date AND found you a blind date AND all you had to do was show up?

and i shouldve said no, i know, but i let him wear me down, and i will own my fault in that. a date starting on such a stupid premise could never have gone well.

but he still managed to find a way to make it worse.

i dont know how long he tried to set a blind date up. it couldve been multiple attempts. he couldve stooped to this immediately. but what happened in the end was that he called a girl from the ward he attended - a girl that he knew had a giant, mushy crush on him - and he said: hey! how would you feel about going on a date this weekend?

(you know, implying it was with him, but never actually saying it.)

and she said YES WOW I WOULD LOVE TO and he said great! and then he called me up and said he found me a date.

i did not learn about his crimes until several weeks later. i will die swearing before god almighty that i would never have allowed this travesty to happen if i had known.

that was on a monday. the date of the date rolled around that friday evening, and im sorry to confess, i really phoned the whole thing in. i showed up in my favorite comfy outfit, which was also a fashion crime: basketball shorts and flipflops and a baja hoodie. it was super comfy but it made me look kind of crazy. i picked him up first, and then i picked up his date next, and then we went to pick up my date, and thats where you're gonna get the play by play.

i arrived, walked across the yard, and knocked on the front door. she opened it almost immediately, like shed been waiting right by it, and i could see her expression go from OMG IM SO EXCITED to super disappointed, then disgusted and finally pissed. and because i didn't know about my friends sins, i thought it was from my outfit. which seemed... harsh. like, hey, im allowed to be quirky, fuck you. also its a blind date, i thought the deal was that we were both going to be sad broken sacks of mortality.

anyway, we looked at each other for several seconds before she slammed the door in my face.

i looked back at my friend. he was sweating bullets. i dont know what he expected from this, but there was this big long pause where we both tried to figure out what to do, and then the door opened up, and her dad invited me in, and he said she was gonna need a few minutes to finish getting ready, and that in the meantime we could sit and talk.

we did not talk. we did sit. i sat down on the couch, and he sat down in a chair across the couch, and then instead of talking he cleaned his pistol on the coffee table. i wasnt actually sure if it was a threat, or if it was just a fidget thing for 40+ year old republican men, but when i tried to help he got snappy so i just watched him put a pistol back together.

he was okay at it.

eventually my date came downstairs, still mad as hell for reasons beyond my ken, and i felt pretty guilty for being such a mess because i thought that was why she was so angry. i tried to make up for by walking her to the car and getting the door for her, just generally trying to be extra polite, but before i could make it back to the drivers side, her dad called me back to the door. so i flipped around, went to the door, and immediately regreted my decision.

soon as i was within range, her dad got waaaay too close to me, leaned in, and said "whatever you do to her, i will do to you," and my brain went into overdrive making three consecutive realizations.

realization one was, damn, the pistol thing was a threat. that sucks. what an asshole. realization two was, wait, im autistic and even i know theres a 0% chance me and my date even hold hands, least of all boink. does this guy actually think there's even a 1% chance of anyone in that car getting laid tonight? is he an idiot? and then realization three went through, which was wait, is this guy threatening to fuck me? and unfortunately, with my brain doing so much processing, my mouth was left to run amok, so somewhere between realization 2 and 3, i said:

"i can't get pregnant"

which, i swear, wasn't actually me trying to be a smartass, it was just me pointing out that he couldn't actually follow up on that threat. it just wasn't possible. we do not live in the omegaverse and im not scared of you.

still, it was an insanely catastrophic thing to say, and the moment we both heard it, we bluescreened. that single sentence obliterated both of our momentary streams of consciousness like a saltine in front of a sand blaster. problem was, he'd probably gone his whole life not even realizing someone could say something that stupid, and making that realization was going to cost him a lot of thinking time. me though? i had been saying shit like that for 17 years, i didnt have to rewrite my expectations of human nature, i just had to plan an exit and start striding. so i was already halfway back to the car before i heard "hey. hey come back. Hey. Hey. HEY. HEY WAIT. HEY GET BACK HERE. HEY-"

and then i was in my car, and i drove away.

if this happened today, he'd have called her, and the whole thing wouldve imploded then and there, but back then, there were still a decent number of teenagers without cell phones. especially the teenagers of insane, gun toting parents. so she just said: whoa what was that all about? and i said: dont worry about it, he'll tell you about it when you get home.

and she said: ok and went back to staring daggers at me and my friend.

WHICH SURPRISINGLY isnt even how the story ends.

we went to an improv comedy show, and it was a disaster. it shouldve been like, 7/10 tops, but between my date being mad, and my friend having a good time, and me having the existential terror of knowing that a guy with a pistol was probably waiting outside his house for me to come back, it was easily 11/10. i laughed way too hard at everything. especially the jokes that flopped. id sit there in this mostly silent room and laugh until i dry heaved a little, and my date was absolutely disgusted, and even my friend was a little embarrassed, which would just make me laugh harder. i laughed so hard that night i could barely talk the next day. and then the show ended, and my friend said, you know, that was a good time, but i think we should maybe do something a little chiller? who wants to walk around the park? and his date said yeah, and my date said no, and i finally had mercy on the poor woman so i said, look, im gonna drop you off. and i am so, so sorry about this, but im dropping you off like a block away. super duper sorry.

do talk to your dad about the pistols thing if you dont want this happening more in the future tho.

and she said: okay. so i dropped her off, and she walked a block down, and that was that.

then i drove my friend and his date to a park that was good for wandering. i figured they wanted something more private, so instead of following them around point blank, i chose a park with this 30 foot rope tower, and i climbed to the top and i said: hey i can see you anywhere from up here, you are officially chaperoned from a distance. get panopticoned idiot. except my friend really is an idiot, and he didnt really get the whole 'now i dont have to third wheel so insanely hard with you guys' thing so he climbed up the tower too, and then his date followed behind him, so there are three people basically sitting together on top of a telephone pole.

and then they started making out.

i was close enough to hear it.

i didnt really know what to do so i was just kind of sitting there, dissociating, when some college kids came around and started shaking the tower. my friend's date went aaaaaaaaaa im afraid of heights :( and my friend went oh, dont worry, ill hold you tight ;) and i went hey, im gonna climb down and ask them to stop.

so i did climb down, and i did ask them to stop, and they flipped me off, which i wasnt even mad about. at that point i was i was like yeah, it would be weirder if this wasnt a mess. gods plan has been to fly this day like a 747 into my metaphorical twin towers and brother he is close enough for me to see him grinning through the cockpit window. still, eventually the college students got bored, so they climbed up the tower, which gave my friend and his date a window to climb down, and together we walked back to my car.

now, i cant explain why this is, but sitting back in the drivers seat was my carriage-back-into-a-pumpkin moment. i'd been chill about all the chaos, just rolling with the punches, but sitting down made me realize how much of a shitshow the day had been, and while i couldnt go back and fix all of it, i could go back and fix one thing.

so i told my friend and his date, hey, you two, stay here and don't do anything weird. don't. then i walked back to the rope tower, and i started picking up the shoes the college students had left at the base in order to climb.

about halfway through this, i realized that if i took all their shoes, they might think i was in it for the money, and i actually wanted them to know i was in it specifically to spite them. fuck those guys. so i put all the right shoes back, gave myself a 100 foot headstart, yelled "nice shoes, assholes", did a little jig, and started running.

my advice to everyone is that college students are faster than you think. even with the headstart, and the whole climb down the tower thing, i was still only fivish seconds ahead of them by the time i got to my car. i flung the door open, looked in the backseat, didnt see anyone, flung the stolen shoes in the backseat, heard two "ow"s, took that as proof of presence, jumped in and pealed out of the lot.

my friend and his date popped up a few seconds later. they were, uh, doing something weird in the back seat. my one request - obliterated.

they climbed up to ask where the hell all the shoes had come from, and i was like yeah i stole them from the college students, and they were like oh. cool. hope you had fun. and i was like, i did. i did. but speaking of fun, what were you doing back there?

and for the first time in my buddies life, i think he was actually embarassed.

[orangejuice333]

I thought it was some external entity

I thought it would be my mother's rage

And I just came to realize that it was me, I am her, the one who would never let anyone touch me again, the one who would never allow anyone to love me.

[miurnawantsmayhem]

Everywhere I go there is a trans person.

In my home.

At my school.

At the mall.

Everywhere,

Perhaps, just maybe

Just kidding, I'm really

A trans person!

And YES, we live in your walls.

We are everywhere

Someone you know is trans. You regularly interact with trans people.

They are closer than you think.

They have entered your home before and will do so in the future.

They are in your walls.

They produced the sounds you hear at night.

You cannot escape them until you join them.

Someone you know is trans.

[inkskinned]

this is just my opinion but i think any good media needs obsession behind it. it needs passion, the kind of passion that's no longer "gentle scented candle" and is now "oh shit the house caught on fire". it needs a creator that's biting the floorboards and gnawing the story off their skin. creators are supposed to be wild animals. they are supposed to want to tell a story with the ferocity of eating a good stone fruit while standing over the sink. the same protective, strange instinct as being 7 and making mud potions in pink teacups: you gotta get weird with it.

good media needs unhinged, googling-at-midnight kind of energy. it needs "what kind of seams are invented on this planet" energy and "im just gonna trust the audience to roll with me about this" energy. it needs one person (at least) screaming into the void with so much drive and energy that it forces the story to be real.

sometimes people are baffled when fanfic has some stunning jaw-dropping tattoo-it-on-you lines. and i'm like - well, i don't go here, but that makes sense to me. of fucking course people who have this amount of passion are going to create something good. they moved from a place of genuine love and enjoyment.

so yeah, duh! saturday cartoons have banger lines. random street art is sometimes the most precious heart-wrenching shit you've ever seen. someone singing on tiktok ends up creating your next favorite song. youtubers are giving us 5 hours of carefully researched content. all of this is the impossible equation to latestage capitalism. like, you can't force something to be good. AI cannot make it good. no amount of focus-group testing or market research. what makes a story worth listening to is that someone cares so much about telling it - through dance, art, music, whatever it takes - that they are just a little unhinged about it.

one time my friend told me he stayed up all night researching how many ways there are to peel an orange. he wrote me a poem that made me cry on public transportation. the love came through it like pith, you know? the words all came apart in my hands. it tasted like breakfast.

[gh0sdae]

On how they still think curly tried to commit with the crash:

[prolibytherium]

One of my all time biggest pet peeves with historical(ish) fantasy is when the writer constructs a religion with a clear bias that it's stupid and false and therefore only the Stupid People and/or commoners believe in it and all the smart/elite main characters are like, quasi-atheists or otherwise just routinely flout established religious conventions of orthodoxy and/or orthopraxy because they're Too Smart for it or etc.

It's usually an extension of assumptions that people in the past were just less intelligent than in the contemporary, just being like "I know that the sun is a star millions of miles away that the earth orbits, but this ancient religion describes it as a chariot flying through the sky" and not really bothering to learn the context and just (consciously or subconsciously) settling on 'that's a crazy thing to think and was probably believed in because they were Stupid'.

And that whole attitude pisses me off so much. People were as 'smart' 10,000 years ago as they are today. These beliefs aren't just desperate, random flailing to explain phenomena that could not directly be accounted for either, it's not like people just looked at the sun and went "Uhhh I don't know what the fuck that thing is, actually. I guess it might be a chariot or a boat or something?? Yeah let's go with that." and based entire religious practices on this. Every well-established belief system exists within broader contexts of cultural values/subjective perceptions of reality/knowledge systems/etc, and exist as part of a historical continuum of religious practices that came before. Even when not Materially Correct, they have context and internal logic, they're not always dead literal with zero levels of allegory, and they're never a result of stupidity.

[soliusss]

Funniest thing I’ve seen on tiktok are those sigma male boys getting mad that American psycho was written by a gay man and going “well I like fight club better” buddy I’ve got some world ending devastating news for you

[captain-grammar]

I trace my finger lightly across his skin, drawing constellations using the freckles on his arms as anchor points; dark stars on a pale canvas that’s just as beautiful as anything in the heavens.

I don’t want to leave. I want to lie here in Will’s arms, drift back into sleep then wake up and spend an unhurried morning with him under the covers, forgetting that anything beyond the door to his hotel room exists. 

But the world doesn’t stop turning just because I want it to. Life won’t pause just because I’ve willed it to. Beyond the door are the judgemental eyes of peers and coworkers who will dine out on even the most innocent of rumours, picking at the kill until all that’s left is a jumble of bleached bones.

I want to stay but I cannot be seen leaving this room. I refuse to let whatever this is become fodder for the circling vultures, or allow the whispers to follow us down the grapevine until the truth becomes distorted noise.