#she's too good for how they're writing her

[jarofstyles]

Tiny picture blurb! Fluffy n cute. They're on vacation <3

Check out our Patreon for close to 300 exclusive writings!

warnings- none!

“Need to see the camera please.” Y/N chirped, leaning into Harry’s body. He was particularly clingy when he was tired and she knew he’d be grumpy, but he’d fish it out of his bag anyways.

"Look like shit, doll. Barely slept." He mumbled, dragging the camera out and placing it into her palm. His hair was a mess under his cap, clothing a tiny bit wrinkled, but she wanted to get ice cream. Jet lag be damned, he still hated seeing any sort of pout on her face.

"First of all, you never look like shit." She scolded him gently as she took the camera in hand. "Second of all, you can hide your face If you want. Can be all aesthetically pleasing, like the Pinterest pictures." Y/N wasn't too picky. "Just want something to capture the memories. It's important I take a cute photo to remember you getting out of bed at 8 in the evening, regardless of how tired you are, because you're the best boyfriend in the world who knows I want ice cream."

Harry found himself smiling as he hid his face in her neck, hand wrapping around her body and placing flat on her stomach. Dragging her into his body, he inhaled deeply and snuggled his way into her. Lips pressed against the curve where her neck met her shoulder as he listened for the telltale snap sound of the shutter.

"M'always going t'get you what you want, I'm afraid. You've gotten me properly whipped into shape. Made me a sucker for you." He whispered tiredly into her skin, the closed eyes and movement of the elevator almost lulling him back to sleep.

"Well, It's a good thing I'm just as gone for you too." The snap of the shutter alerted him to the photo being taken, but he made no move to get his face away from the warmth of her. Why she wanted an iced treat when it was cool out, he didn't know- but he'd spoken the truth. He'd do anything for his girl.

[sakuravalenp]

What if, Danny considers all the storyline as part of the service.

Sam, Danny, Jazz, Tucker and Dan create the characters with so much love. This are they're OC'S y'all.

The characters have backgrounds, but more importantly their current situations. Why are they working here?

Anna is struggling financially and her parents are threatening to throw her out, so she's desperately trying to get money before that happens.

Joseph is saving to finally get formal education and finish highschool. He wants to be a good example for his future kids and be able to afford they're education.

Angeline is so happy to be a head chef. As a women, it's been hard getting this position, despite all her years of experience in the kitchen. She's still working on balancing being too soft with the people under her, and being too strict. But she loves this job so much.

Things like that. And their wardrobe and character design! They all spend hours around Danny asking him to change and adjust like one of those girl games where you created your own doll. But you have infinite options and complete freedom.

“Could you make the hair a tan bit lighter? No, no, that's too light.”

“Sam, it's almost the same color!”

“No they're not, and I need something in between!”

"I think the nose should be bigger? Yeah yeah like that. And let's put a mole here!"

"Ellie, there's already a mole there."

"Well, then make it darker, because I can't see it!"

Danny got a phone just for this, where he keeps the characters notes. The phone Gallery is full of photos of him in character wearing all the possible wardrobe the character would wear.

At some point Paulina and Star are pulled in to create some outfits. Maybe they know about Danny, maybe they don't and they simply say that some co-workers need help with their fashion.

Sam, Danny, Jazz, Danny and Dan reunite every now and then to put together storylines. It's open improv so they're not writing scripts but more like events that need to be reached. (Choose whoever you think is speaking)

“How ready are you for kid characters?”

“Uh… haven't tried yet?”

“Because I've been thinking that Alice could be a teen mom!”

"She's like 23, a bit old for teen mom, you know?"

"Was a teen mom 🙄. The kids is like 8."

“Wait, isn't Alice going out with Mark? The Mark that has explicitly said that he absolutely never likes kids? The one that was thinking about proposing?”

“Yes, so picture this. Alice comes to the restaurant for whatever reason and it is revealed that Alice has kids, and never told Mark!”

“Mark has a temper, it would be a whole screaming match! The drama! Will he reveal he was planning to propose?”

“Okay, okay, but we need some ground work, we can't just get that out without any hints.”

“Well, it'll take me a while to get a kid right.” Danny says while making a clone half his height but with all the proportions wrong. “So we have time for that…”

They're all aware that the clients go to the restaurant more for the absolute soap opera that the workers have for lives, than for the food. Sure, the food is good, but the drama? The friends to lovers, the love triangle, the break ups, the return character for last season.

It works because no one knows these people outside of the restaurant so it feels like pure gossip that doesn't actually affect their community, but also they can interact and affect the story!!! And the community is closer than ever because it's impossible to be there for every scene, so they rely on each other to be up to date.

The whole bats being suspicious still work, since they all may have forgotten the characters should have some life out of the restaurant, that is seen instead of just told. Characters are only seen within the neighborhood for special scenes in the neighborhood bakery, and whatnot, but they'll always be back at the restaurant or disappear before they can follow them anywhere else.

There's no way all these people live there, and it doesn't match with how they act in the restaurant at all. What's going on!?

Danny's becoming the best actor in history. In the end, all the duplicates are still him. He just wished to know how Vlad did to reintegrate the memories of so many duplicates without getting a headache.

Danny didn’t mean to be so shady.

He had been working hard on his duplicates and had recently gained the ability to morph his appearance.

So he decided to challenge himself to see how long he could run a small business only using him and his clones.

The plan was to, at most, seem to have a group of quirky employees.

Unfortunately, it seems he has accidentally left more of an impression of being a shell company for less than legal reasons.

Good news is that he had did all the legal legwork properly and was not breaking the law.

Bad news was that the bats were getting suspicious and were trying to catch him in some sort of act.

Oh well, this just means that the difficulty has ramped up!

[prettiest-thing-in-the-morgue]

First of all I wanted to say I love ur writing style.

What I wanted to ask is I came across a prompt in ur asks from someone about batfam x neglected reader which u also told u would write.

I just want to know when u might write it because genuinely I loved the prompt and love to read it.

The link of the post is https://www.tumblr.com/prettiest-thing-in-the-morgue/781014256622714880/hi-i-have-a-batfam-x-neglected-reader-angst?source=share

hihi ! Sorry took so long to reply , I had a huge authors block and an unsolicited break (づ ᴗ _ᴗ)づ♡

For some reason it won't let me access the link but if I remember properly it was this ask 🎀

rushed ; cursing ; idk man , edit in honor pof fathers day lol

january marked a month of hope and prosperity , a month of new beginnigs , a shed of the old in many cultures. but to y/n wayne it marked the month of brutality and an era of neglect . she always knew her family loathed her .

cassandra and stephanie are not saints either - in fact stephanie runs a controversial podcast alongside cass where they actively debated with other celebrities - often known as the duo whom likes to instigate things. damian wayne does not have a pretty track record either - he is often every week has trending becuase news of him violently beating up another kid at school got surfaced.

wasn't of of spite , wasn't of of hatred , wasn't out of anything but pure neglect. in comparison to most of her siblings , y/n wayne actaully had a decent public appearance . something most of her family can not relater to .

she did not have have a messy social life like her father , frequent videos of him in night clubs galroe , her older brother dick who had several articles critiquing the manner he cheated on his wife , kori , the night before their wedding or jason's plathera of tabloids talking about his messy death.

tim is not safe either - you think tech genius and prodigy would keep his messy relationships under the wraps would you ? safe to say y/n wayne and duke thomas are the only two wayne family memebers with a decent background.

duke barely posts but y/n wayne is a known and well revered celebrity and lawyer. graudated from Harvard law , top of her class , known as a living legend who passed her bar exam on her first try since 1990's. not to mention she also co-graduated from harvard medicine and was already running her own firm and clinic a year after her graduation. was president for both class and student council and was captain of harvard girl's volleyball team.

y/n wayne is the girl every socilaite talks about , the girl your parents compare you too , the girl everyone wants to be , the perfect embodiment of a wayne . yet despite how good she is , her family would never like her , except for alfred.

alfred pennyworth would never say he had favorites to anyone in the family who asks him in jest but it does not take a person with a brain to figure out it is y/n wayne . the man , despite his old age would personally drive himself to harvard's campus and spend the weekend with name in her apartment that he himself bought for her because why woukd his favorite child live in a dormitory ?

the man personally meal prep a week's worth of food just for her - feigning that his baby shouldn't have to worry about meaningless work she has more important things at hand. said man attends all her events , parent meetings , her school seminars , all her speeches - he personally records for himself , graduations , personally attended her first clinic opening , met her first girlfriend in highschool , literally goes dress shopping to spa and makeup appointment because his baby just got her nails done and has a big gala to attend to why should she worry about driving when he can ?

basically y/n wayne is that man's pride and joy , if anyone walks up to this man and asks about any of the wayne children he'd give a small polite , " they're doing alright " but ask him about y/n wayne ?? that man is already pulling out his phone to show his lockscreen of him and y/n at a recent gala where she gave an opening speech and he will talk your head off about her .

safe to say y/n wayne's life at home maybe depressing but alfred made up for it. flash forward to early morning , and the news are lighting up , ' y/n wayne caught holding a child in gotham square could this be a secret wayne child we don't know of ?'

alfred practically rolled his eyes when he saw those news - it wasn't public information but y/n along with her highschool girlfriend actively run an orphanage , the reasoning why it wasn't public was because y/n wayne kept it under the wraps for the children's safety and wellbeing so her highschool girlfriend became the face of said orphanage and y/n was just a silent owner.

alfred rolls his eyes again before switching to another channel - he knows y/n wasn't waking up anytime soon because last night she not only had an emegency surgery , an unscheduled meeting with italian overseas investors for her firm but she also had an emergency enrollment . alfred doesn't know the specifics of why and how but he knows she did message him that she had been called by gordon about taking in a child last night and he assunes that was just her and the child in the pictures.

alfred sets put the tableware as the other wayne members fillter in. bruce had am angry expression and everyone else was muttering amoug themselves , " how can she shame us like that ?" , " i know she was weird but i mean.." , " such an attention seeking whore i mean whe couldn't keep it in her pants ?" , " for fucks sake shes 16 - when I was 16 i would never do that shit ".

breakfast continued on just like that , everyone murmuring and gossiping staurday morning in silk pajamas except bruce whos taken to brooding more this morning. alfred had just finished washing up before going to finish up y/n's breakfast when she walked in.

she's dressed immaculately , red ysl heels and black channel pants and jacket along with a dark maroon shirt. she wears her gold accesories , her hair is open and free , makeup minimal but beautiful as she strolls in towards alfred.

" I know such a disrespectful child like yoruself is not perading in my house when she was outside being a whore ! " bruce angerily exclaims as his eyes glare into her. y/n just stood there shocked and confused , " what are you even on about ?" she asks.

y/n embracss alfred , has not even glanced at her family - she hasn't since she was a wee naive 11 year old. " morning pa " she greeted him. alfred embraces her back , " morning hun , work meeting ?" alfred asks and before y/n can even respond bruce angerily slams his hands against the table.

damian snared , " dont pretend your not a hooker y/n your disgrace is all over the news " . " yeah y/n have some fucking class " stephanie retroted. y/n just stood there and just looked at them , " listen - i don't know what the fuck crawled up your asses this morning but i am no hooker " y/n said defensively.

bruce laughed , " shut up y/n , you've alaways been a disappointment now ? now you've surpassed it". y/n glares at him - how dare he call her a disappointment when he is one ? " yn its all over gotham fucking news how you have a secret love child no one knows about - like for fuck sake name your 16 close youe damn legs " tim yells at her.

y/n just stands there shocked and angry , " go fuck yourself " she curses before walking out , alfred trailing after her. y/n just walked straight out before walking into her red proche and speeding out of the gateway , not even stopping for alfred.

alfred sighs in disappointment but he's also furious and walks back inside , body shaking as he stands before the rest of them. " IN WHAT WORLD GAVE YOU THE RIGHT TO TALK TO HER LIKE THAT ?" he yelled at bruce.

bruce hides his immediate shock but yells back , " SHES A 16 YEAT OLD WITH A BABY WHAT ELSE WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO ?" . alfred can practically feel the vein in his head popping

" YOUR DAMNED DAUGHTER IS 25 BRUCE , 25 AND WAS NEVER FUCKING PREGENANT " , alfred cursed back , enraged. bruce sat back , in both shock and embrassment and the others ? well the others can only open and cllse their mouth shut . " ..25..." jason murmured as if it's unbelievable . " yes your damn sister is 25 " alfred confirms , voice angry.

" THEN WHAT ABOUT THE KID ?" Stephanie yells back . alfred practically feels himself loose more braincells , " SHE FUCKING CO RUNS A DAMN ORPHANAGE SO SPEAKING SHE HAS MANY KIDS I'D FUCKING KNOW I MET THEM ALL " he shouted back.

alfred then walks off , grabbing a suitcase along with him. " wait where are you going -" dick asks as theh watch alfred haul the suitcase into the foyer , " i'm going to stay at y/n's " and walked out.

[track11]

rockstar's muse

pairing: drummer van palmer x fem rockstar reader summary: with the popularity of your band growing, you decide to set the record straight on who your songs are about warnings: none!! a/n: sorry this is kind of short, but i love me a good yellowjackets au (moodboard here) song rec: i can see you - taylor swift word count: 1k

You never expected to get this popular. The band you made with your friends started as a joke, but here you are, backstage at a pub in the city with quite the crowd waiting for you.

Your popularity is almost overwhelming, but it’s also so fun. It's a way to let off steam and express yourselves, and if that draws a crowd, you can't complain.

With a couple of minutes before showtime, you laugh with your bandmates, chatting as you pass a joint around.

Jackie’s pleased with herself, having managed to get Nat to dress up (secretly matching what Lottie's wearing), and you’ve forcibly applied glitter to Van’s face. She had rolled her eyes and said she was “too cool for sparkles”, but there was little she could do when you sat in her lap and applied the makeup with a grin.

“You guys are up.”

You take your place on the stage, gripping the mic as the others find their instruments.

You’re not the only one with a decent voice, but Lottie absolutely refuses to sing and Nat feels more at home on the guitar, so naturally, you became the lead singer.

You write most of the songs too, occasionally with the help of Shauna, who isn’t officially a part of the band, but she hangs around enough to be included.

People adore your songs, the raw talent and energy you all have, the authentic words you sing, they just don’t know who they’re about.

The fans have their theories, of course.

Maybe she has a partner? I heard Jackie wrote the songs about her boyfriend… or maybe about that girl who’s friends with the band? No, it’s Lottie and Nat, have you seen how they look at each other?! - That one always makes you laugh, the two of them are completely oblivious to each other’s feelings, and it's hilarious how the fans have picked up on them but not you and Van.

For some reason, no one ever suspects a thing about you two. The fans never catch how she looks at you or how you always gravitate towards the drummer as you parade around the stage.

The two of you got together around the same time the band had formed, sneaking around after practice and making eyes at each other during gigs. It was exhilarating. Then the band found out - rather quickly because the two of you were extremely obvious around your friends, and suddenly half your songs were about her.

You’re the front woman and Van’s the muse. You sing your heart out to fans who cheer your name, and she plays the drums behind you, knowing you'll run to her after the show.

Van can’t help but feel a little jealous about how much the fans practically worship you though. Of course, she loves sitting back and watching you perform with your pretty outfits and messy hair. What she doesn’t love is how much the fans enjoy it too, especially without knowing who gets to call you theirs.

But she can’t blame them, not really, you just look so confident, like a real rockstar. Plus, you both decided not to publicize it for the sake of being professional.

Though that doesn’t stop either of you from trying to hint at your relationship. You point to her during your favorite songs, smiling as you sing, and she always introduces the band to the crowd, never failing to compliment you,

“Our beautiful lead singer!”

You thought you’d done enough the time Van came on stage with a lipstick kiss on her cheek in the exact shade you were wearing, but somehow they didn’t connect the dots. Hell, you even wrote a song basically spelling the situation out and it still didn't work.

You love your fans, but god they're clueless.

You can feel Van staring in the middle of your set, playing the drums on autopilot as you sing the words you wrote only for her. It always gives her a small sense of pride, the way you sing about her so passionately, so honestly. It makes the fact that the fans can't comprehend you're together a little sweeter.

You laugh into the mic as you turn to face her, she looks completely bewitched - it’s the same face some fans have when you get up close to the crowd.

There in the moment, something hits you. It's fun to sneak around and wait for the fans to spread rumors, but you love her, and you need them to know it. Plus, they obviously won't be figuring it out by themselves any time soon.

Before she can stop you, you pull her up from the drum kit, the song doesn’t need a beat anyway.

“What are you doing?”

Still singing your sweet words - albeit slightly giggly and out of breath, you shrug off her questioning, pulling her to the middle of the stage, careful not to tangle her in the cord of the microphone.

You’re practically serenading her, and she’s gone completely red. Sure, that’s what you do every time you write a new song, but in private with just the two of you, never in front of the entire crowd.

Still gripping her drumsticks, she’s standing next to you awkwardly, trying to block out the crowd’s cheering. She’s not used to being front and center, but she does her best to focus on you.

Stage presence has become obsolete and you refuse to break eye contact as you sing. She’s watching you like no one else matters, and no one does. All you care about is showing her how much she means to you.

By the end of the song, she’s redder than the pub lights and smiling at you like you’re the only one there. She’s standing in front of countless fans who are probably in love with you, but you’re in love with her.

To set the record straight once and for all, she pulls you in for a kiss, smiling against your lips as you kiss her back, ignoring the screams of the crowd.

Finally, you declare just who you’ve been singing about.

taglist 💌: @callsignwidow My requests are open (and slowly being worked on) <3 masterlist

[emeraldserenade]

ER Visit and High Actions ~ Joaquín Torres

synopsis: You have to make an ER visit, thank goodness for your husband, Joaquín.

tw: fem!reader, talk of strong pain relief drug use (prescription!!), reader has kidney stone (like me), wife!reader, reader is scared of needles and has never had an IV or surgery before, this is basically what I went through but I didn't have Joaquín (I had my mom with me), I did write this high on pain killers, barely edited.

fic, ficlet, drabble, request

Sorry for not posting on the 12 or the 13th, I was just in pain for the 12th and in the ER the 13th!! I hope you guys aren't mad!! Not me making a fic, based on the fact that I went to the ER at 8am. I have a kidney stone way too young, going to the urologist on Monday to for a follow up!! I am also on really strong pain meds right now, so this may make so sense. It also may make a lot of sense since this is basically what happened to me.

➽──────────────❥

Joaquín was there when you doubled over in pain and collapsed on the floor. Well, you slowly descended to the floor while you dealt with the pain.

Joaquín rushed you to the ER, thankful that there was no one else in the waiting room. You quickly checked in and just as quickly were called back. Your vitals were taken while the doctor asked you the normal questions, you all shared a laugh, even though it hurt you, when he made the joke about not needing to know if you were sexually active. You saw the concern pass the doctor and nurse practitioner's faces, as well as Joaquín's, when you said your pain was about a 6.

Joaquín had to wait in the waiting room while they put in the IV port into your arm and took your blood. You hated needles and never had an IV before, so wished he could stay with you; however, you understood that there was only so much space. You joined Joaquín in the waiting room as soon as you had given your urine sample and were dismissed.

"They're waiting for a room to open up, the hospital's pretty full," you mumbled, the pain slowly ebbing back to the dull throb instead of the sharp stab.

"Do they know how long that will be?" Joaquín was worried that it was appendicitis.

"Hm, they said maybe like 20 minutes. They're finishing up with someone and then have to clean the room enough for me," you told him, you were exhausted. You had woken up at unholy hours of the morning, you were only showing up so late because you were convinced they were really bad cramps. But when your heating pad and ibuprofen wasn't working, you had woken Joaquín and gotten up to get ready. That was when you collapsed, slowly descended, to the floor and Joaquín rushed getting you both ready.

Joaquín gently wrapped an arm around your waist, pulling you closer to him on the two seater chair by the window. You laid your head on his shoulder while holding your hands to your lower right abdomen, where the pain was. "Torres?" You were called and you both walked to the lady. "Hi, I'll take you to the room," she told you and you nodded, following her there.

You settled onto the bed and started rubbing your arm above the elbow where the IV was. "What's wrong?" Joaquín questioned, leaning forward in his seat.

"It may just be my weird fear of things in my arm, but I swear I can feel the plastic tube move with my arm. I want to bend it but I also don't," you mumbled, clutching your side a little bit more as the pain ebbed back to full force.

"Hi, I'm Shelly, I'll be your nurse practitioner today," a blonde introduced herself and you smiled. "How are you feeling, other than the obvious pain," she asked.

"Tired and wishing I was at home in my bed," you answered her while she smiled at you.

"Well, I just wanted to ask how you were and to let you know that you'll be collected for your CT scan soon," she told you and you nodded.

✧°˖ . ݁˖︵‿❀‿︵˖ . ݁˖°✧

You were sitting alone in the cold hallway of the hospital right outside the CT room. You told Joaquín that you would be ok to be alone, but you hadn't realized that he was one of the only things keeping you from crying. Not just of pain, but at the prospect of having to have surgery for the first time.

"Mrs. Torres, you can come in now," the CT operator told you as one of the nurses rolled the bed of another patient out. You walked in and did as you were told, you sat down and laid out the way you were told. The awkward angle of your arms straight up made it really easy for you to feel the plastic tube of the IV but said nothing. The iodine for the contrast did exactly as the lady said, it made you warm and it truly felt like you did pee yourself. It was over before you could start to get uncomfortable with feeling the plastic tube and you were being led back to your room where Joaquín was waiting.

When you reached the room, Shelly walked in a few minutes later to hook you up to the IV. It started to go and you glanced up, it was wide open and you could feel the beginnings of the fluid enter you.

✧°˖ . ݁˖︵‿❀‿︵˖ . ݁˖°✧

You were watching old Cartoon Network shows, Teen Titans Go specifically, when Shelly walked back in. She was holding a few things and you were confused.

"Are you allergic to any medicine?" Shelly asked and you gave her the answer. "Ok, this is Toradol, it's a pain med. It'll help you feel better," she informed you and you nodded. You watched as she drew the correct amount before connecting the syringe to your IV. You held Joaquín's hand the entire time, your arm had started to get cold from the IV. Shelly must have noticed because she took the sheet that was supposed to be your blanket, not that you were using it, and gently laid it out on your arm to help warm you up. "Whenever you need me, press the button," were her parting words as you looked to Joaquín.

"I love you," you muttered, you felt like you needed to tell him as a thank you for taking you to the hospital.

"I love you, more," he replied and you gently shook your head.

"Impossible," you mused but he just gently pressed a kiss to your lips before scooting his chair impossibly closer to your bed, all while still holding your hand.

✧°˖ . ݁˖︵‿❀‿︵˖ . ݁˖°✧

You hesitated to press the button, but Joaquín did it for you. "What can I help you with?" Shelly questioned, popping her head in.

"I need to use the bathroom," you told her and she smiled.

"Ok, let me unhook you," she moved to the IV and stopped the flow before disconnecting the IV line from the port. "I'll bring you to the bathroom," she lead you out of the room and to the left.

Using the bathroom was a whole different experience. You didn't like the feeling of bending your arm with the IV port in, but you also had to pull your pants up. Your prayers were answered when there was a small knock on the door. "Mrs. Torres?"

"Yeah?" You pitifully called back, defeated on the toilet.

"Your husband told me you felt weird with bending your arm, he's right here if you wanted to let him in to help you," Shelly said through the door, you were thanking every star in the galaxy for giving you Joaquín. You stood, waddled to the door, stood awkwardly behind it, let Joaquín in, and shut it once you could.

"I got them down with one hand, could wipe, but I got stuck here," you mumbled, embarrassed but thankful that it was Joaquín helping you.

"It's ok, angel," Joaquín soothed you and pulled your shorts all the way up again, adjusting the way they sat to not be resting directly over the pain. He stood behind you as you washed your hands and dried them before opening the door for you and letting you walk in front. "How are you feeling?"

"Great actually, I think I'm a little high," you told him and you got a to see his breathtaking smile. "I love when you smile, and laugh, and even just look in my direction," you told him as you settled back into the bed. Shelly was waiting for you to get back and hooked you back up to the IV, you shivered at the saline entering you again and she covered your arm back up.

"You're definitely a little high," Joaquín told you, his smile still on his face.

"Yeah," you nodded and gasped when you heard the opening to The Amazing World of Gumball. "I loved this show," you told Joaquín, grasping his hand.

At some point of the quiet, you started to play with Joaquín's hand. You gently bit one before mumbling a sheepish sorry. "Amor, why'd you bite me?" There were no malice or judgement in his words, just cirousity.

"You're bitable? I don't know, I just didn't know how to express my love," you huffed.

"Hey, hey," Joaquín shushed you and you realized you were lightly crying, the meds were really making you high. "I wasn't judging or telling you to stop, I was just wondering. I think I deserve to know if you were suddenly being a cannibal," Joaquín joked and you started to laugh with him.

"I have good news," the doctor walked in. "You're not pregnant and it's not appendicitis; however, you do have a kidney stone. Which for your age is unusual, what do you normally eat?" You told him, looking at Joaquín for confirmation since he cooked a little more than you did. "Hm, ok," he nodded. "It could be genetic, do you know if either of your parents have some?"

"I think my dad does," you answered and he nodded.

"Well, since you are younger, I'm going to refer you to a urologist. Here's a strainer," he placed down the white funnel looking thing he was holding, "strain your pee until you pass it and put it in a baggy. You'll want to get it tested," he told you and you nodded. "Well, I'll go get the discharge started, the nurse will be back to finish everything else," he bid you goodbye before leaving.

✧°˖ . ݁˖︵‿❀‿︵˖ . ݁˖°✧

You were walking out with Joaquín, he was holding your hand and the discharge papers. You had a smile on your face as you left and turned to face him a bit when you got into his truck. "Thank you for taking me," you told him, leaning over the middle console to kiss him.

"Hey, of course, cariño. I promised to love you forever, no matter what's happening. And that's a promise I intend to keep," Joaquín told you, giving you one last kiss before you moved back into your seat. cariño = honey/darling

You were headed home while you waited for the pharmacy to fill your prescriptions, and you couldn't wait to lay in bed with Joaquín for the day.

➽──────────────❥

Masterlist | Requests If you want to be added to the tag list, follow the directions on my masterlist

[bewitched-hours]

hello! can i request a fluff oneshot (or headcanons!) for boss! two time x singer!reader ? erm ive been having this idea for a while now and thought this dynamic couple will be cool lol,,, also thank you!

Ooo, sounds like a good idea! I'm assuming you meant that Two Time is the reader's boss but I'm sorry if I misunderstood (•﹏•;)

Reader's getting She/Her pronouns!

Life could be a dream~

You worked directly under your partner, Two Time. As a singer.

People loved you and you loved your friends but you were hiding your relationship for obvious reasons.

It was all a bit of a shock, at first. You didn't know Two Time was the boss of a live music branch and you just so happened to become a singer... In their specific branch...

You agreed to keep it a secret, treating each other as though you were just friends while making up reasons to reject romantic advances from others.

But when you were alone together, it was like a switch flipped.

Suddenly you'd be all over each other, acting like newlyweds and being completely obsessed with one another.

If anything, it was extra motivation to have them be your boss.

Perform, tend to fans, repeat. All until your shift is done and then you usually ask Two Time when they're getting off. Usually it was a few hours after you which gave you the chance to take the quicker route home and prepare dinner.

It worked with the fact you loved cooking. And Two Time also insisted on cooking sometimes too when they or both of you have an off-day.

They're not the best cook but the fact that they try still warms your heart.

And at night you were cuddled up on a Queen sized bed, often switching who was the big or the little spoon at random and not caring about how much space you leave open.

Truly, a life of bliss...

I hate how short this turned out but I couldn't think of much more, please give me ideas if you'd like more of this- (╥﹏╥)

Anything you'd like to request/ask? Check out my pinned post first and I'll be happy to write up whatever you want!

[sushirrrry]

FRONTLINES: COMING HOME || a part two of a harry styles x original character story.

full story, tomorrow.

summary: after being discharged from the hospital, Harry returns to Manchester haunted by the war but grounded by the letters and quiet devotion of Clare, the nurse who helped piece him back together. their relationship, born from each reunion that they hold so dear to themselves until they're able to see each other again—until their longing becomes impossible to deny, and love replaces what war tried to destroy.

READ "FRONTLINES" HERE.

_______________________________________________

May, 1943 - 3 Weeks After London - Manchester

The house had a hush to it that still startled him.

No men shouting over static radios, no bombs whistling from above or below or side to side, no engines humming like angry ghosts in the sky through clouds that wouldn’t give up. Only the sound of the kettle clicking off, the tick of the hallway clock, and his pencil scratching softly against paper in the front room as he viciously wrote.

He sat, half-curled sideways in the armchair by the window, blanket wrapped over one shoulder, letter perched on his knee. A candle flickered nearby, though the overhead light had long since been switched off. He preferred the quiet and the dim when he thought about writing to Clare.

Clare’s most recent letter rested on the arm of the chair; folded, unfolded, and folded again so many times the crease was near worn through.

Harry smiled faintly as he reread the way she’d described how her flat felt without him there — tiny, drafty, and full of too many books. Said she couldn’t look at a cup of tea lately without thinking of how he always asked for a second.

He didn’t even like tea that much. But she always brought it to him in a good mug.

He was in the middle of writing a sentence — I think about that night at the bar more than I should — when the hallway floor creaked.

His sister’s voice floated into the room like an announcement, amused and matter-of-fact: “It’s well past midnight, you know.”

Harry blinked up at her, not wanting to ignore her but always needing to get his thoughts down. Nora stood leaning in the doorway in her dressing gown, arms folded. Her dark hair, always too curly for its own good, was tied up in a loose braid against her back, and she gave him a look only older sisters could manage: part concern, part accusation, and mostly curiosity.

“Mum’s noticed,” she added, crossing her arms as she made her way over, “You’re hardly sleeping. Or when you do, it’s in that chair.”

Harry gave a low sigh, set the letter aside. “Just writing, Nor.”

“Every night?” She asked, a bit pushy in trying to get information from him. He already was quiet, but then he went to war. That changed him more than he’d like to admit; now, he was just secretive, like the one thing that he wanted for himself was just sitting between his own fingertips.

He rubbed the back of his neck. “I’ve got time to make up for, that’s all. Mum doesn’t need to worry.”

Nora’s eyes narrowed. She stepped further into the room, picked up the letter on the arm of the chair and glanced at the handwriting.

“Clare,” she read aloud, smiling as Harry tried to grab the letter back from her; a flush over his cheeks remembers words she mentioned, really only for his eyes. “So, this is why you can’t sleep, then.”

“Don’t start now.” Harry mumbled under his breath.

“Oh, come on. You’re out here smiling at her letters like some daft schoolboy. You’ve read that one a dozen times.”

“Eleven,” Harry muttered, earning a sharp jab to the shoulder.

“I knew something was going on. You’ve been out in the garden scribbling into the wind like you’re composing poetry.”

“I’m not writing poetry,” he said, a bit defensive. “I’m writing back. And she’s not just — she’s not…”

He trailed off, unsure of how to say what he meant. He wasn’t sure how to explain that in a time where everything had been stripped down to survival, Clare had shown up and seen him — not as a soldier, not as a body to medicate and stitch up, but as a man still holding his own guilt and softness in trembling hands.

Nora softened as she handed him back the letter. “You really like her.”

Harry nodded, voice low and raspy then. “She made it bearable in there. And it was never supposed to be more than talk to pass the hours spent in that hospital bed. But—”

“But now you’re smiling at paper like a lunatic,” she teased, cutting him off. Nora sat down on the armrest beside him, “Does Mum know?”

“She’s only asked if it was a girl I was writing," Harry licked his lips, "I didn’t answer.”

“She told me she hopes she’s pretty.”

Harry huffed a soft laugh. “She is. Beautiful. In that way where you don’t see it all at once—it’s hard to describe, but she’s one of a kind, I think.”

“My God, listen to you.” Nora nudged his shoulder. “You are writing poetry.”

[simpy-simpers]

Day 7 - Possession

Couldn't pick rain or no rain so I chose both. Technically had this 50% done as a wip but it fit the prompt so I did itttttt

I love them so much

rahhH!! Skinned Teeth!!! I love this story so baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad. Slice of life turned straight into psychological horror in a chapter.

Anyhow, I'd write lore, but that'd be too nice and I'd have to stay up later, and I want to sleep. Maybe when I draw them again I'll add more about them!!!! Ballora/Emilia Afton(Maiden name Schmidt) and Henry Emily. They're so tragic. ough. yes I need them to kiss thank you for asking.

I'll include the writing snippet below that had inspired the story itself. Trigger warning for minor violence(?), body dysmorphia, uhmmm generally just sadness. Not my best writing and it was written in one go so it's got a bit of a weird taste to it, but I figured I'd share with the class if anyone is interested. I hate saying names in stories, it feels weird and interrupts my flow. So for context, "she" is Emilia Schmidt/Ballora after getting springlocked by William within Ballora, and "he" is Henry, this is a couple weeks after finding her once she'd escaped (going over how that'd work), and after she spirals. For context, the above picture is of when he first finds her after everything. blah blah blah blah. Enjoy!

Looping time spent in song and dance, the same steps memorized, the song burned into her mind. She’d long resorted to closing her eyes, hoping to find solace in sleep.

To sleep was to be alive.

Oh, to be alive. She longed to be such. Though she spun and sang with laughter in her steel throat, and her eyes blinked with the sparkle of being, she did not fit. Her reflection was enough to prove so.

A monster.

A creature.

A machine.

The way her fingers clicked on the sink, sounding as steel does upon the granite. A metallic ting she’d never escape. Nothing was the same. She did not know these eyes, nor the body that held her anger. 

She could feel the slow hand up and down her back, a comforting sensation amongst the mental anguish.

But she couldn’t look away from the demon in the mirror. 

In the dark, she could forget, relive memories, and pretend it was all as she wanted. She didn’t have to see these blackened eyes or pale skin. She could forget how her face separated when she was startled, and the horrors beneath it.

She could forget.

And how she wished to now. To be scared of her appearance.

All the nights of whispers in her ear, reassurances of beauty and love, meant nothing when she couldn’t recognize her own hands. She couldn’t feel the fur of her favorite coat, nor did it fit the same.

The stagnant hair had clung to her head for too long, but it was all she had.

It would never grow, it would never change.

Fragmented reflections weren’t any better, only more of a beast. The glass fell with her to the ground.

Someone was holding her up.

It was him.

His face was buried in her hair, and hers in his chest. She could see the blood leaking down from his pierced skin. How she wished to feel a pain like that. Unblinking eyes, yet she still couldn’t see just right.

A touch like this hadn’t graced her in years. Or was it decades? The silent years of the bunker had warped her mind several times over.

He was shaking. She could hear his tears more than feel them, a gentle tap on her silvery cheek.

“ –so sorry– I’m so– fuck…”

She couldn’t bring her arms to embrace him back, but she managed a voice.

“I know.”

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yippeeee

not the best at writing angst but I like it. Anywho, that's what's in place of the lore today. Have a good night/day yall

Stay simping!

[skoolnites]

𝙀𝙣𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙩𝙚𝙙 (𝙩𝙖𝙮𝙡𝙤𝙧'𝙨 𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙞𝙤𝙣)

cb98 x reader

previous chapter | series masterlist | next chapter

->𝙬𝙘: 1.1k

->𝙨𝙪𝙢𝙢𝙖𝙧𝙮: basically just y/n rambling and connor intently listening to every word she says

->𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨: swear words, not proofread

->𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙚: filler chapter whoopsie, you can tell when a chapter is filler because it takes me forever to write, everyone lets pray that i become more consistent in my updates but also don't hate me if i don't, i'm a busy gal (i have a job now and a terrible attention span) sorry i lied about when i was posting but i was watching the pacers game and my loyalties lie with the pacers sorryyyyy

Enchanted (taylor's version) - Taylor Swift 

Please don't be in love with someone else, please don't have somebody waiting on you,"

i knew it then, i yearned. i was terrified that you had a girlfriend cause, like how awkward would that be. also like, when you looked into my eyes (holy hell am i a sucker for blue eyes), i nearly screamed. there was so much uncertainty, so many feelings, so many things left unsaid, and so many thoughts running wild. so i grew a pair and took a step with this song flashing through my mind. it wasn't a lot, and you probably don't even remember this but to me it was the moment that started everything

⇄           ◁◁  I I  ▷▷         ↻

⁰⁰ ³¹ ━━●━━━━━━━━ ⁰² ¹¹

early november 2023

y/n still wasn't sure. she wasn't sure if she felt more than she wanted to, she wasn't sure what the math homework was, she wasn't sure how the hell she got into this situation, and she certainly wasn't sure how she got the connor bedard to lay on a basketball court with her in mid october after only knowing her for a week. Still, her feelings would probably make themselves known whether she wanted them to or not. She'd text someone for the math homework; she definitely knew how she got into this situation, and she'd asked him if he wanted to look at the stars with her, and he said sure. 

the autumn air was perfect for her, even if goosebumps were forming on her arms under her hoodie. she could feel the wind through her hair and in her lungs from the passing cars. This park would always be her home base, it was familiar, safe even. so when she had stupidly asked connor if he wanted to hang out, she at least knew where she would take him. getting him to lie on the empty basketball court with her was a ploy in her mind, because if she didn't have to look at him, then she could be more normal.

"ok, wait, so you're telling me you don't do anything else besides hockey?" y/n asked.

"i mean, not really, even growing up i had a pretty one-track mind," 

"but, like, what about fun?"

"what about it? hockey's fun to me. do i need to do other things?" y/n sat up a bit when he said this

"do you ever burn out?" she asked.

"i don't know, i don't really know what burnout feels like, there are times where every time the puck doesn't go in the goal, i wanna break my stick, or a shitty penalty call makes me want to quit, but i never do."

"you're something else connor," y/n giggled, sitting fully up. "do you have a social life?"

"friends?" connor asked, sitting up as well so that they were facing each other, knees almost close enough to touch.

"yeah, friends, but also, like, do you go out?"

"i mean, most of my friends i met through hockey and, i guess, school. i had a girlfriend for a bit too, but that's over now. i liked her and had a good time with her when it was just the two of us, but she used to drag me to parties and other things, and i hated them. i do like hanging out with my teammates on our days off though, that's fun they're like my brothers, so it's different. you?"

"oh, um, well, i met a bunch of people from doing dance as a little girl. even after i quit, we stayed close. i have my school friends and the girls in my section in choir and my bandmates, of course, but i don't really keep a large group, i think a couple good friends are more valuable than a bunch of ok friends" y/n tried to avoid the relationship talk. against her better judgment, y/n did some digging to try and see if connor had a girlfriend. he was such a private guy, but of course, a name came up, she was hoping it was the ex he was talking about.

"the worst part about most of my non-hockey friends is that they don't really treat me like a person if that makes sense?" he's looking at her more intently now, "no one's really seen me as anything other than connor bedard hockey all-star,"

y/n shifted under his gaze, needing something to break the tension, "if it makes you feel any better, i've been telling myself that you're just some dude since you agreed to hang out. i feel like it eased up the stakes, not that this was a high-stakes thing. still, just like you know, any situation like this can be anxiety provoking or, well, like i guess is just making me jittery, and now i'm rambling like a dork, i'm sorry," y/n laughs at herself because it's the only thing she knows how to do.

[shatcey]

Good people

You know that feeling… you really need to finish something (you have a deadline), but you're stuck. It's like there's nothing in my head… empty. I usually just take on another project. Something short… sort of distraction or practice. Call it whatever you like. This idea came to my mind after I wrote a very silly scene with an overly positive Kate. This is completely out of Kate's character… maybe that's why the idea was still stuck in my head. And I decided it was time to write it.

Liam / Harrison / William / Elbert / Alfons / Ellis / Jude / Roger / Victor / Kate. Around 1100 words. It was supposed to be a very short scene. Like… 200-300 words. But… Boys like to talk too much. And I really like how it turned out. WARNING!!! References to corpses, multiple stabbings, blood. These are the villains, and we will be present on their missions. But I tried to make the description as vague as possible. Kate is Vivi's girl in the pre-relationship stage. But she's already fascinated by him. Kate has a very strong positive filter. Which the guys are trying to… break. Dividers by @.sweetmelodygraphics

Next morning after that.... horror scene

At breakfast, Kate suddenly looked at Victor and asked.

Victor, I was wondering... how are these guys doing?

The guys I saw yesterday... on the ground.

William looked at Victor and turned back to Kate... There was amusement in his eyes.

Well...

For the first time in who knows how long, Victor didn't know what to say.

I'm sure they're fine, you told me they wouldn't lay there for long...

A cough that looked suspiciously like barely concealed laughter.

Were there... guys on the... ground yesterday?

Alfons looked at Victor with the same amused expression as William.

Yes...

How horrific!

They were probably tired or too drunk. Or Victor just work them to the bone.

I don't remember him being simular to Jude...

Hey! I'm not forcing you to do more than you're capable of.

I'm not catching... What are they talking about?

Kate saw the corpses yesterday...

Harrison!

Several people shouted his name at the same time, but only Kate continued.

How could you assume that? This is Victor. He wouldn't kill a fly.

(buzzing of a fly)

I can hear a fly. Victor, could you kill it?

...

For some reason, Victor was staring at Kate unblinkingly.

No problem, I can do it... If it makes you happy, Harry.

Ellis took out a knife and cut the fly. The buzzing stopped.

The fly probably got tired and went to sleep...

Yes, it's deadly tired...

Poor thing.

Victor finally recovered from his shock, knelt down in front of Kate and took her hand.

Don't tell me he's going to propose to her after that?

Owwww... It's really sweet.

Kate, dear... do you know what we're doing here?

Yes, you conquer evil with evil so that England prosper.

And how do we do it?

By telling people not to be bad.

(sound of the crickets)

Is she for real?

She truly believes in that…

How could she be so naive at her age?

Kate.... What if I tell you... that people don't tend to listen? They do bad things over and over again...

That's sad.

Leave it to me! I'll talk to them. I can be very persuasive...

Oh, dear...

How she survived...

That's a good question, dear Elbie...

Kate... What if I tell you that we kill people?..

Impossible! You are good people.

(awkward laughter)

Why do you think so?..

You are very kind to me. You are good people.

I see the problem...

I suppose we have no other choice.

She has to see it for herself.

The next night on a mission (Liam, Victor , Roger)

Liam landed almost silently, like a cat, next to the bloody mass that had been people just a minute ago.

See? Liam just killed these people.

He's an actor.

Yes...

So, this is a rehearsal.

No, my dear.

What else could it be? I'm sure they're fine. And it's not real blood.

Liam looked confused. He turned his gaze to the corpses and muttered...

Didn't I finish them off?

You definitely did.

Okay… I started thinking that I needed to stab them a couple more times to be sure…

But they aren't dead!

Liam frowned and looked at the corpses again.

Kate, don't confuse our kitten.

But...

Come on... Maybe the next mission will convince her.

A few days later (Ellis, Jude, Harrison and Victor)

As soon as they entered the alley... they were attacked by a group of very big guys. Kate, who witnessed the real brawl, didn't look the least bit worried.

Kate... step back!

There was panic in Victor's voice, so she obeyed without question. She took a few steps back and continued to watch the "show." She couldn't called it something else. All the guys' movements were so smooth and graceful. It was like dancing... with a weapon. But the "show" ended much faster than she would have liked.

Victor rushed to her.

Are you hurt?

Of course not. It was so beautiful!

Did she hit her head or something?

If she did, I didn't notice...

Is your head hurt?

No, nothing like that... Don't worry.

It was a dance, right? I've never seen this before.

Dance...

Jude snorted.

She's even more lunatic than Ellis.

Am I a lunatic?

Of course not! Jude is just exaggerating.

When did you find time to practice? I couldn't look away. It's amazing...

Kate's eyes were shining with delight.

Maybe we should take her to a doctor.

Roger checked her. She's fine.

I don't think so.

No, she isn't...

Kate and Ellis looked at each other and smiled, as if to say.. these guys are so silly.

In a few more days (Alfons, Victor, Elbert, William)

There was a row of cages in the basement they entered. There were several people in rags in each of them. The guy with the whip pulled out his tool and hit one of the cages with a loud bang.

Well, well... What do we have here?

We have to free them....

Are you sure? Maybe they like it...

Like being whipped?

Don't judge! We don't kink shame here!

Why did I say that?... (*)

Alfons sneaked up to the guy with the whip and whispered something in his ear. And immediately after that pierced his body with a sword. Kate noticed the dreamy expression as he fell.

See? Alfons just killed this guy.

No. He didn't.

There is a blood on the floor.

It's fake blood.

He's not an actor like Liam. Where would he get the fake blood?

They're friends. So...

Amazing! I don't even need to use my abilities, she lives in an illusion all the time.

Maybe she's afraid of reality...

The sound of numerous footsteps approaching made everyone turn towards the exit.

Several people with obvious murderous intentions appear one after the other and line up in a semicircle so that the Crown does not have the opportunity to slip out.

William took a step, another one.

Everyone who is not from the Crown, take your weapon and kill yourself.

The guys who had been full of themselves just now suddenly looked at their hands in fright, which had done what was ordered. And in a matter of seconds, not a single enemy was left in the room.

William turned around and looked at Kate expectantly. As if he couldn't wait to hear her version of what had just happened.

That was very kind of you.

Kind?

William was stunned for a moment.

Obviously, they had some kind of incurable disease.

Why would you think that?

Why else would he order them to die?

(eary silence)

Is she for real?

I'm not Harrison.

A pearling laugh echoed through the room.

Victor, we have to keep her. She won't survive without us.

Yes, yes... I suppose you're right.

Kate smiled happily. (**)

(*) - this is a reference to the same line that Victor said at the animal event. I showed the screenshot here.

(**) - at that moment, I thought… maybe she was faking it. But… Harry said she wasn't lying… maybe she tricked him somehow…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

🔝 𝕊𝕋𝔸ℝ𝕋 ℙ𝔸𝔾𝔼 🔝

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[loserabby]

more headcanons about the parent!verse aka everyone from my mom!abby fic cause i had too many thoughts about everyone while writing

you know those dads that rough-house too much with their kids, hang them upside down by their ankles, swing them around for ages until they finally put them down only for the kid to immediately fall to the floor? that's ellie and dina (to an extent). jesse has to use a stern 'mom' voice to get them to play more gentle.

the snowball fight scene in tlou2 with the kids? where they just absolutely annhilate the kids? yeah thats canon too. keep in mind jj is like 3 in this universe so they're pelting 3-5 year olds

abby isn't a paediatrician but she's stands in on all her friends kids doctors appointments in case they get scared. she gives them squishy sweets at the end cause she thinks lollipops are a choking hazard at their age (she's right)

ellie calls jj potato so much he once insisted his name was potato at daycare and teacher!reader had to try not to laugh when dina came to pick him up

manny is the resident fun uncle and the kids all want his attention as soon as they spot him. he holds their hands and lets them walk up him until they're up so high he flips them over.

abby's youtube recommended is so severely fucked from learning braiding that even when she learnt how to do the most intricate braids without needing to watch anymore tutorials, they still come up in her recommended. she'll never escape the braiding youtube tutorials

dina is the resident gossip mom of the class but it's ellie who manages to actually get a hold of the gossip, no one knows how but she does and she WILL let joel know too

teacher!reader doesn't put two and two together that owen is abby's ex-husband until maybe three months into dating. it's not a secret and abby genuinely thought you knew, it's only when she's showing her pictures of her and her dad that owen appears and abby casually mentions "oh yeah that was after we got back from our honeymoon". you might glare at owen for the next two weeks when he picks up his son from daycare on principle but otherwise are fine

SPEAKING OF OWEN AND ABBY'S MARRIAGE, they obviously dont celebrate their wedding anniversary but cause they ended on good terms they still send each other a card and gift on their divorce anniversary, like beers or an amazon delivery of whatever snack the other is liking at the moment. they dgaf tbh

yara sometimes will wake up around 10pm and walk her tiny self to the kitchen for a cup of water. if abby has fallen asleep on the sofa she'll wake her up with a simple "mama it's bedtime and that is not a bed" and then leave so all abby hears is the soft padding of her feet. if abby is in bed then she wakes up to find the empty cup left on the counter and the kids step still left out

the daycare teachers know way too much about the parents thanks to the kids unintentionally tattling on them. ellie secretly started smoking again? jj is in the home corner, pretending to put toy food in the oven with one hand and pretending to have a cigarette in his other. owen called in work pretending to be sick cause they wouldn't let him leave to go to mel's scan for baby n2? kiddo n1 sits happily happing to Y/N and Cat telling them all about how his daddy made it sound like he was 'really really sick' on the phone.

[404daydreams]

And I'll always will! Shine bright like a crazy diamond.

I am everything that I wanted from someone else, even more. I'm in a relatonship with my soul, exact truly the way I loved people - and I will never abandon him ever again. I can't even fathom of hurting myself to keep someone warm. I'm not rushing anything, my career and passion are the most important. There is a woman at my workplace who seems quite beautiful and interesting. We haven't spoken yet but we do make eye contacts all of those 8-9 hours, like a sparkling way of meeting eyes. If I catch her looking at me, she flinches and when she stares at me then I flinch, Its just a cute little moment of "I didn't look at you."

No rushing, I am becoming the garden where butterflies will come, I don't chase, but attract. Due to the flying monkey situation, I keep minding my own business, but I have an interesting group of people around me now - except those flying monkeys.

When the right one will come, it will all make sense. Enough of the days where I am sad about someone else's action. I admitted that they never deserved me anyways, its nice that they showed me their true colors before I was stepping into a marriage with them.

Life's been treating me good, finally. I am not the kind of a person who would harm his self-respect but my love, those intense emotions made me do lose it, but I lost it to a wrong person. The kind of begging in writings I have done, is not the kind of a person I am. They're free, and its a choice they made to never speak to me, or see me again. Now I don't care, because I did too much and it all drifted in the abyss where I was standing but after it passed I live with an adbundance mindset.

Who wants to be with me, they will. I'm no more questioning that why everyone and why not me? - It's a choice. Period! They can live with their choice and I'll live with mine, and I am relentlessly doing it.

Not jealous, not miserable. Just slowly fixing every part of me that people intentionally damaged. I am no more crying on why they did this? Because this is who they are and they never loved me. They just love the attention, if they really loved me - everything that they do, wouldn't be executing.

I'm happy and grateful with what I have. And I look forward in life. I deserve the world in love, and until there's a person who is willing to genuinely, I'm single focusing on my work and my music.

If someone didn't love me, or value me, or compared me physically is no more my pain to carry. I'm not insecure, I am safe withing my skin and people hate it. Well, haters are motivators. People who compared my physical aspects or spoke shit about me, behind my back should remind themselves of who they were and how they were before any skin treatment, yet I loved them with all I had, until I was forced to leave, tried reconciling, only served silence.

This just shows how they are self-absorbed and refuse to acknowledge on how I have stood up for them, in any circumstance and I played my part well except a couple of horrible mistakes that i even apologized for, and I never received anything.

This kind of silence is stonewalling, another psychological abuse to keep their victims hanging on a thread of hope to get their fix and that never happens, cut the cord, fly down, break a couple of bones and make a massive comeback.

In love - you just don't disappear, you don't plot things against them so your personal vendetta can be fulfilled. In love you don't let your body being a brothel, you don't fuck around.

Some simple truths I've been ignoring, but when the acceptance happened, it took me a while to digest it.

They never loved menand accepting the fact is making me shine like a crazy diamond.

A journal entry, 14th June 2025, 11:07 AM.

[barkingbarghest]

So true!

I've seen some discussion floating around about Lumièrian characters as parallels for or extensions or expressions of this-or-that Dessendre. And, while I do enjoy the idea of Lumière and its people as a thematic extension of Aline's grief, I don't agree with a more literal read and prefer, as you say, an interpretation where the people of Lumière, especially those we see in the game who are several generations removed from any original people who Aline created firsthand, have grown independent from their origins.

But bringing it back to Lune and Sciel, I also love those characters so much and how they are used to explore grief.

I think about Kirsty Rider's amazing line read on [Even her last words were still—“Finish our work.”]. She sounds unsurprised, but maybe a little disappointed too or resigned like some part of her was hoping for something she didn't get. It reminds me of Lune's conversation with Sciel, and her admission that she'd once harbored a hope that her parents' Expedition had actually succeeded.

I think it's very purposeful that we never see or hear anything about or from Lune's parents that contradicts her assertions that her parents' work was their first priority. It's a noticeable contrast from the kind of open affection that's expressed in the other families. I got the sense that Lune never knew if her parents did love her in the same way Gustave loved Maelle or Renoir loved Verso, or at least if she did then they gave her plenty to doubt. And Lune is the kind of person who is always questioning things, looking for definitive answers.

Lune's relationship with her parents was complicated, and it burdened her, but I totally agree that she isn't happy they're dead. It's just not that simple.

Also yes! Sciel's grief is worn openly, such a fantastic choice by the character designer, in her surgical scar and bracelets. Sciel is a really cool perspective to have in the group because she's most at peace with her grief. Like you pointed out, she has holes left behind but she's still growing around them. She's such an interesting, and at times refreshing, contrast to all the characters who are stuck in their grief unable to escape their gravity.

I don't have too much to add, but I do want to mention how Sciel only got to where she did through the support and connections she made. At her lowest, she was adrift at sea and carried back to shore. Her friendship with Sophie and Gustave, her love for her students, it's no wonder Sciel is always the one to bridge the group when they begin to diverge.

The writing and performances are so good at drawing these textured pictures, and I really like the inclusions of Lune and Sciel as alternate sketches of how grief affects us separate from everything the Dessendres have going on.

Speaking of grief, I also love how the writing treats the grief of Lune and Sciel.

For Lune, it seems her parents' gommage was both sad and a relief. With how strict they were in her upbringing it is clear that it built some resentment as they effectively caged her. But at the same time, she didn't hate them.

It's also clear that Lune does genuinely love exploring new things and study them thoroughly. She's very much her parents' daughter, but with them dead the pressure of performing and conforming is gone and she can analyze and study what she finds interesting. And play music when she wants a break from studying.

That is an aspect of grief that I rarely see explored and even less rarely explored well. There are moments of missing them, but mostly it is a release. It's not the same as her being happy they are dead, which some might interpret it as. Just, a release of a constant pressure that you still miss sometimes.

The way Sciel's grief is always with her but very rarely shown. And being able to remember good times along with missing their presence. It reminds me of that line Jaheira says in BG3: “You twine your life around the people you love. And when they’re gone, you grow around their absence instead. It is just another way they shape you.”

She's a great example of how he death of a loved one isn't the end of the world. There's still fun, laughter and growth to be had around and through the hole they left in you.

I really like the more nuanced and subtler versions of grief those two bring, it complements the more stark versions of the Dessendre family and it also reinforce that they are real people. In whatever way they started out as Aline populating Verso's world/canvas, they grew beyond what she initially made.

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

Y'know, it's unfortunate more people don't compare Louis and Violet in good faith.

Like, when I do see people compare them, it's usually through the lens of one is good, and the other bad. One is more canon than the other, and here's why. One is objectively better for Clementine, and the other is less impactful, worse written, didn't have chemistry with her, insert several insults here, etc.

I don't think it's inherently bad to express why you might not like one of them, or why you prefer one over the other. That's fine, that's a matter of opinion. It only gets to me when it becomes hostile, or passive aggressive... but even then, I've learned to just roll my eyes and move on. Some people make it very clear that they're not worth having a discussion with.

However, I wish I could read more nuanced comparisons of the two that didn't default to the "and that's why this one is better." At least some are kind enough to tack on a "for my Clementine" at the end.

You know how it goes: Louis is cute and he makes Clementine laugh, whereas Violet's boring, her love is shallow, she's still not over Minerva and she's using Clementine as a rebound. Violentine's a bad ship because Violet's actually a traitor, and they're practically the same person and that's bad.

Violet's loyal and reliable, whereas Louis is annoying, he never takes anything serious, he's a traitor for his vote, and he's nothing but a distraction. Clouis is a bad ship because how could any Clementine possibly like him after he voted her and AJ out? That's bad!

That's always the conclusion, right? One good, one bad.

This is incredibly limiting and it drives me nuts.

They're foils. They contrast one another, highlight each other's strengths and flaws, in such an interesting way that it makes Clementine's choice between them all the more meaningful.

One is not good and the other bad, they're different, and I think that's worth exploring.

Let's start with a common argument: Violet is the more impactful option due to her connection to Minerva.

Now, to be fair, I can understand why someone on Team Violet would believe this. Yes, it's true that the confrontation with Minerva is more impactful for a violentine shipper who has more investment in Violet as a character. Louis doesn't have as strong of a connection to her.

However, what they're failing to recognize is that Minerva isn't the only ghost to haunt this narrative. Violet may have Minerva, yes, but Louis has Marlon... and that doesn't just go away once Marlon's dead.

Violet's route has Minerva as her ex-girlfriend, and her bond with Tenn that all comes to a head on the bridge. Louis' route has Marlon's death and how that specifically impacts his relationship with AJ and Clementine, and the slow burn of forgiveness on all sides.

Marlon and Minerva are also reflective of Clementine's worst outcomes.

Clementine and Marlon were tied together through Brody's blood splattered on their hands and faces. They both killed a part of Brody, but only one of them lies about who killed her first.

After Marlon dies, Clementine gradually replaces him throughout the game; Rosie is her dog now, she uses his bow [which Louis gave her], she becomes the leader. Clementine gets them to fight back, and when three of her people are captured, she doesn't cut her losses. She does what Marlon couldn't; "we're getting them back."

When she chooses Louis, he does for her what he never did for Marlon: he steps up.

Clementine proves she won't become Marlon just as she proves she won't become Minerva.

After getting James to agree to help them, Clementine and AJ talk about what to do if she ever gets bit. AJ says he'd want her to bite him, too. He repeats this sentiment after she's actually bitten, telling her he wants to stay and they could turn together, peacefully.

When Minerva confronts them on the bridge, she's dying... and she wants Tenn to die with her. She doesn't care who she has to kill in the process. She's more monster than human at this point, and most times, she succeeds.

They're both bitten. Clementine could've become a monster like Minerva in the end. She could've killed AJ, and they could've become walkers together. But she didn't. Minerva wanted Tenn to die for her, and Clementine wanted AJ to live for her.

Also, I should mention she has Minerva's axe. She carries the key weapons associated with Marlon and Minerva throughout different points in the game, further solidifying these connections. She uses Marlon's bow to save her friends, and she uses Minerva's axe to save AJ, who in turn uses it to save her.

What's also so interesting about this is how Marlon's alive in episode one, and Minerva is thought to be dead. Louis has his best friend, and Violet's lost hers. But, at the end of the episode, Marlon's dead and Minerva's revealed to be alive.

Marlon becomes the ghost, and Minerva becomes the monster. Clementine becomes to Louis and Violet what Marlon and Minerva never could... how does that not drive anyone else insane?

So, no. One is not objectively better, or more impactful, because of a connection to Marlon or Minerva. They're different. It just depends on which storyline you personally find more compelling.

Actually, let's talk about that a little more.

In my opinion, the most intriguing point of comparison between Louis and Violet stems from their perceptions of survival, and how that impacts Clementine.

An argument I see made against violentine is that Violet's boring because she and Clementine are too similar. This usually comes from clouis shippers who prefer the "opposites attract" dynamic Clementine and Louis have.

On the flip side, there's the counter argument that Louis is reckless, that he doesn't take survival as seriously as he should and Clementine wouldn't want him because of that.

These are interesting to me because I get where they're coming from... but they ultimately miss the point.

The other day, I replayed TFS. Except this time, I did something a little bit differently. I played my usual clouis route, but then I had the violentine route pulled up on my laptop so that I could watch these scenes, comparing them side by side… and something occurred to me. 

Louis is about challenging Clementine's perception of survival, and Violet is about validating it.

Louis challenges Clementine from the very moment we meet him—he’s playing music. His initial philosophy on survival butts heads with Clementine’s. The fact that hunting with him and Aasim challenges your perception of “your choices have consequences.” These games have conditioned the player to think along the lines of, “Yeah, Louis is more fun… but if I don’t hunt with Aasim, we won’t have any food.”

Except that’s just it. I hate to say it, Aasim, but in the grand scheme of things… hunting with you doesn’t matter. It's actually less rewarding. You know why? Because in the next section, we get food from the train station. It would’ve been more beneficial to spend time with Louis over hunting, hence how he challenges you.  

This then primes you for the choice between choosing to follow Louis or follow Violet. I know people complain about how this is presented with Violet doing something productive [checking the walls] and Louis playing piano… but that’s the point. If you’re going through with Louis’ full route, you need to meet him at his level, and in turn, he will meet you at yours. You need to accept the challenge, the idea that Clementine isn’t entirely right about the way she’s gone about survival.

Oh, and do I even need to mention the vote? The debate over Louis’ vote is exhausting. Often times, people tell on themselves in how they talk about it. It’s not actually about the fact that he voted against them. If it was, these people would have a bigger bone with pick with Mitch, Willy, Ruby, and Omar… and yet Louis is the one who takes all the blame as if he’s the only one personally kicking them out. 

Louis is reacting to the death of his best friend, and the complicated feelings that come with it being caused by AJ. He wants accountability, even if he knows something's wrong. You can either agree with him that it was murder, and set AJ on the path of atonement… or, you can double down and tell him to fuck off, AJ was justified. 

But here’s the thing… the vote adds to the appeal of Louis’ route. To someone who hates him, or at the very least is critical of his vote, that sounds mad or delusional.

Except it’s really not.

Ever heard of a thing called tension? Because there’s a lot of it in ep2 between clouis + AJ and it’s fantastic.

Yes, Louis voting them out is problematic because we need a problem to solve. We need something to feed the tension between him and Clementine. He stepped in front of a gun held by his best friend in order to protect her, forever changing their relationship… only for that to seemingly be taken away from us the moment AJ shoots Marlon. 

Yes, Louis’ route is about being challenged, but it’s also about challenging him. That he’s able to forgive them, that he’s able to question his own survival philosophy and understand theirs, that he’s able to apologize and actually change for the better… that right there is what makes clouis so damn good. 

He becomes hardened whereas Clementine softens. By the end of the game, they’re on a similar level now without neglecting their differences, and they can move forward together. 

That’s what makes Louis’ route appealing… and it’s also what makes it unappealing to people who prefer Violet. 

By contrast, Violet’s already on Clementine’s level when it comes to this perception of survival. She validates that Clementine’s on the right path.

They have other similarities in the way that they’re both female, queer, they both have a kid they look after, they’re not always great with other people, etc. 

People who prefer Louis might consider this boring, but I think to Team Violet, it’s comforting. It’s comforting to have a partner who takes this as seriously as you do, who wants to get shit done. They’re playing Clementine with a similar attitude, and don’t believe it needs to be challenged. It’s comforting to feel validated on something you already firmly believe in. 

We also see this if we compare the hunting and fishing scenes. You have to make an effort to choose Louis by choosing to neglect hunting, but the game makes you fish with Violet no matter what.

Violet’s prioritizing fishing because they need food. That’s what they’ve set out to do, so let’s do it. The game is letting you know that’s the case, and if you value that, continue pursuing her. 

While fishing, they discuss why things are weird with her and Brody. Violet doesn’t take well to Clementine’s blunt, “Because you make it weird. Brody tries and you just make fun of her."

That’s understandable because I think she already kind of knows why and is looking to have her feelings validated. She prefers it when Clementine suggests that it’s because Brody never said sorry for what happened to the twins. 

There’s also comfort and validation in the way Violet sides with Clementine and AJ after Marlon’s death. She votes for them to stay, vocalizing how much she disapproves of the results. There’s this feeling that I recognize from a lot of the sapphic romance I read; “it’s you and me against the world, I’ll always have your back, even if you’re in the wrong, I’ll fight for you.”

In our case, it’s violentine + AJ against the rest of Ericson, save Tenn and Aasim. Violet validates that AJ was justified because Marlon was a liar and murderer, claiming that AJ and Clementine did nothing wrong. Violet fights to keep them. 

The tension between violentine in ep2 is different because instead of one pushing the other away, they’re being forced apart by the vote and there’s nothing they can do about it. That tension is somewhat released when Clementine comes back and they’re reunited, working out a plan to best defend the school. 

It’s also why Violet’s presented as doing something productive when you follow her instead of Louis, and why she asks if you want to hang out after checking the defenses. 

All that being said, allow me to reiterate that one is not good and the other bad, they're different. These concepts of challenge and change/validation and comfort exist on a neutral road as diverging paths. It’s up to the player to pick what path they prefer, but that doesn’t mean the other path isn’t worth acknowledging or analyzing. 

I should also mention that they’re not exclusive; there is overlap with validation being present in Louis’ route and challenges in Violet’s. They’re just more present in episodes 3 and 4 after we’ve made our decision. 

There are several more examples of how this all fits together, buuuuut–

Ya’ll wanna compare some allegories?

Those familiar with my content might already know where I’m going with this as I’ve made a post about Louis and the piano in the past. 

You see, I believe that there are allegories for Louis and Violet’s hearts present in their routes: Louis’ piano, and Violet’s pin. 

I already have a thorough, in-depth analysis of Louis and the piano that you can read, so all I’ll say about it is that on the night of the raid, he asked Clementine to carve a piece of herself into his heart so that no matter what, their initials will be immortalized together in its wood…

And that makes me fucking feral. 

But I'm also so normal about it.

As for Violet, her heart is the star gazing pin she gives to Clementine. She gives it to her so she’ll always remember that night… but she doesn’t give it to her until after Clementine’s saved her, and that fascinates me in the context of it being allegory. 

Louis asks Clementine to carve herself into his heart right before the raid, cementing that from that moment on, he is utterly devoted to her. I believe this is part of the reason why Louis is still happy to see her if he’s the one who’s captured. Yes, yes, he’s also incredibly traumatized from having his tongue cut out and he’d be happy to see anyone, yada yada… but listen, if you romance Louis and he’s captured, his heart remains with her—that piano with their intitals is on full display. When he sees her, he’s still so devoted to her that he refuses to accept that it’s at all her fault. Even when she says it is, he shakes his head... and he so easily accepts her when they’re together in the end. From the moment Clementine puts knife to wood, he’s hers. 

Now, look… you might think I’m going somewhere not great with this but hear me out. 

I think after Clementine’s gone star gazing with her, Violet is fully ready to give her heart to her. Y’know, give her the pin. But, think about what Violet said about how people have left, but Clementine came back. Plus, with the impending raid to think about, maybe Violet should keep the pin until the right moment. 

I believe a key difference between her and Louis is that Violet needs one last thing to solidify that Clementine’s the one. 

Louis gives her his heart prior to the raid because of everything that’s already gone down between them following Marlon’s death. Violet needs to know that Clementine’s willing to fight for her the way she fought before. When Clementine saves her from the raiders, it’s solidified. Even after she sees Minerva again, it changes nothing.

It’s also worth noting that the pin is something Clementine wears. Like the piano carving, it’s a piece on display for everyone to see, to let them know whose heart Clementine has.

Violet literally handed Clementine her heart as a means of saying, “I’m yours. I’m devoted to you.” 

This is why romanced/captured Violet is devastating, and is why she behaves the way she does in the cells. She was so ready to give her heart away and then nope, sorry, Vi! You get knocked unconscious by raiders instead! 

If anything, you kind of deserve to be told to fuck off if you romanced her and then let her get captured. Just sayin’. 

Look, I have a lot of complicated feelings about the captured violentine route, mostly with Violet being as forgiving as she is after her eyes are burned—yes, yes, I know, her eyes are burned and Minerva messed with her head so of course now she’s not hostile, yada, yada. 

But I think it’s rather telling that you don’t get the pin in this route. Sure, Violet’s willing to forgive and possibly pursue this romance in the future… but she’s not ready to hand over her heart, not truly. Not after everything that’s happened. 

And if you want to get extra angsty about it, imagine that Violet made the pin right after they parted ways, but before the raiders came. Meaning that if she’s captured, it’s possibly still sitting somewhere, abandoned. 

Mmhmmm, very normal about this. I feel normal. My normalness about this continues... normally. I'm not losing my shit thinking about that. Nope. Why would I? I wouldn't! So normal.

Okay just let me talk about their reactions to Tenn's death and then I'll shut up.

This makes me want to gnaw my own foot off, I can barely handle it.

AJ shoots Tenn on the bridge because Clementine trusted him to make the hard calls. This saves Louis or Violet's life.

When Louis jumps across, he's completely silent as he watches Tenn die... and then he's pissed; "What the fuck?! How could you just shoot him like that?!"

AJ explains himself, that he did it for him, and Louis is so upset that he forces AJ to look at what he's done, to watch the walkers eat Tenn; "Tenn's dead. He's dead! Do you realize that?! Look! [...] He's... he's gone, because of you. Just fucking gone."

If Clementine says AJ saved his life, Louis says, "So what, we just cut him loose? Gun him down like he was nothing?"

If Clementine says nothing, Louis says, "Tenn was just a little boy!"

The reason Louis responds this way is because in this moment, he just relived Marlon's death all over again, but worse. So, SO much worse!

When Violet jumps across, she breaks down, begging, "Oh, my God! Oh, my God! No, no! No, no, no..." as she watches Tenn die... and then says to AJ, "No! What the fuck?! How could you do that?!"

AJ explains himself, that he did it for her, and Violet is faaaar from okay; "For me? I can't... Tenn is gone! That soft little boy who liked to draw, he's gone, because of you!"

If Clementine says AJ saved her life, Violet says, "You think that's okay?! Just gunning down one of our own?!"

And there it is.

Louis is hardened in this situation because he already went through this... Violet hasn't, not with AJ. She softened up throughout her route due to her relationships to him and Clementine... but this is the moment where she realizes that maybe AJ wasn't as justified as she believed, and this is the consequence.

This leads us to the ending where AJ asks if they're still mad about him killing Tenn, and I just... I'm biting my foot right now because the script has flipped.

Louis is forgiving and understanding. He's soft, he's sympathetic, he shakes AJ's hand to let him know that all is forgiven and they're okay; "I... AJ, I guess it's like... You saw something I didn't. About the situation, I mean. Minnie and the walkers and Tenn, it's just all this chaos in my head when I think back on it. [...] Clem says you saved my life? Well, then, that's exactly what you did. And how can I stay mad at anyone for doing that?"

Or, alternatively, "He was your friend, AJ. I know you are hurting just as much as I am."

As for Violet? She's understanding, too... but she's not quite ready to forgive yet; "The thing you said on the bridge...that he was messing up all the time. It wasn't something new, you know. Tenn got himself or other people into trouble all the time, long before you guys got here. He was always so lost. He lived in a world that just...isn't there, you know? And that's why I tried to look after him. But when I was pulling him away from the walkers, and Minnie, I could also see...he just wasn't there anymore."

"So you're mad, but sad."

"Can I be that for a while?"

And it's completely understandable that she's hurting and struggling with how she feels about AJ moving forward! She wants to be okay, she wants to forgive him, she just needs time.

Now, because I'm forever bitter, but I'm gonna mention this as well: whenever I see someone point at Violet's scene and say, "See!? This is how LOUIS should've acted in ep2!" like... they're telling on themselves again. Not just that they don't understand Louis as a character or his route, but that they don't fully grasp Violet's part in this either. Or time frames, for that matter.

Let me put it to you in simple terms... they react the same.

After Marlon and Tenn die, they're upset. They're pissed. They blame AJ and yell at him. After they've had time to process what happened [Louis after the two week time skip, Violet after time passes between the bridge and the ending] they share the same, "I'm still upset about Marlon/Tenn. Can I be that for a while and still be your friend?" sentiment.

The difference is that Louis is treated poorly for it because of the vote, and because we feel it first hand for longer... Violet got to grieve off screen and come back after she's sorted herself out.

It's a disservice to both of their characters because it's rooted in that same mentality that I criticized at the beginning: "This is why one is better than the other."

Do I need to say it again? I'm gonna say it again.

One is not good and the other bad. They're different.

There are so many fun discussions that could come from putting Louis and Violet side by side, and examining them. I haven't even covered the different ways they're introduced, or compared their ep3 dates to see what it says about them and the overall narratives! What about the cell scenes!? How they react when Dorian's about the cut off their fingers! The way they approach James upon meeting him!

That last one in particular is especially funny! They're all under stress about blending in with a herd of walkers to infiltrate a boat to save their friends, and yet Louis easily saunters up to the guy wearing walker skins with a smile, and makes him laugh by saying, "Functional and fashionable. I'll take two."

Violet approaches James like he's an injured wild animal that's going to bite her, and bless her heart, she tries with, "I, uh… hey. Hey there, James. Sorry about Willy." Then James gives her this judgmental side-eye, like buddy? She's not the weirdo here.

There is so much potential to dissect here, and I want to see people do it... but I want them to do it fairly, in good faith.

I want to get away from the idea of comparing them to "prove" which is better because there is no objective better. There isn't! That's a waste of time!

I'm so done with The Debate™; it's unhelpful, it's annoying, and it's boring as shit. I've heard it all before, and you probably have, too.

I want to put Louis and Violet under a microscope and study them with the thought process of, "one does this and the other does that... what does it mean!? what does it say about the narrative!? Oh my god, they have the same opinion on this thing, WRITE THAT DOWN!"

So yeah, that's my ramble for the night.

I'm gonna go replay TFS for further research.

[spacedace]

another bit from the "Constantine adopts Elle au" idea I posted a snippet of yesterday:

The days immediately after the…loss of Elle’s brothers weren’t the hardest. It would, they’d all learn soon enough, only get worse as their friend’s mental state continued to deteroriate. At the time though, it had certainly felt like it couldn’t have gotten any worse.

Elle had always been, for as long as Lian had known the other girl, been a bright, energetic person. Even when being drug from bed in those ungodly hours that so easily could be labeled as late night and early morning equally to go fight some asshole who couldn’t wait for decent crime-spree hours. Elle had never been so cruel to the rest of them as to be chipper during those awful exhausted - and exhausting - incidents, but she’d always been upbeat. Rousing them into feeling more alive with a carefully currated playlist blasting over the comms and promises of delicious, greasy breakfasts at their favorite twenty-four hour diner that she always delivered on.

She was always vibrant, always excited for whatever came at her next, always dancing ahead of them all in search of a new hobby, a new special interest, a new once-in-a-lifetime experience. Her eternally burning hope that the horizon would have something better, something brighter not a foolish security blanket to hide behind but a weapon she weilded against the world. A spine of steal, a heart of a stellar nursery, a hand equally capable of being stretched out in friendship or clenched into a fist ready to deliver the nastiest left hook that side of Metropolis.

Elle Constantine was a lot of things - a good number of them questionable - but in every single one of them, she was full of life.

So seeing her so completely empty…

The Justice League had gotten roped in on their mission before they even realized the scope of it all. Grand-Bat looming and scowling and digging his grubby fingers into things, the rest of the League not much better as they wormed their way in on the case. For all the good it had done, when they’d been too late actually on the scene to be of any actual use. Only able to show up hours after their initial call for backup when the shit show was finally over and the world saved.

She and the team were all still reeling by the time the got there. Elle still crumpled on the ground, coverd in soot and blood in a writhing heap of pain no one else could even begin to understand. The still air rent by her ragged, broken voice wailing and keening like a banshee from the stories of old.

Screaming until she coughed up blood. Hands dripping red and green ripping at the dirt, at her clothes, at her hair, her skin. Shreiking in mindless, all consuming greif as they tried to calm her down, the only words anyone could make out the broken shapes of her brothers’ name.

Jon had to pin her arms to her side in the end, face pained as he tried hard not to hurt her while keeping her thrashing frame in place. Connor crouched before her cradling her tattered hands in his as he tried desperately to get her to follow his breathing, his own voice thick with barely contained tears. Damian, soft hearted beneath all his bluster and bristling, dropped to his knees beside her in the blood soaked ground and simply wrapped his arms around her in a hug.

There had been nothing Lian wanted more than to be with them in that moment. To join her team in trying to help their friend through the initial horror and agony of having a part of herself so cruelly ripped out and crushed before her very eyes. She wanted to wipe at the endless tears falling down Elle’s face and hold her hands and wrap her in a hug and weep with her over what had happend.

Wanted to get them all out of there, get them back to the Tower, get them all washed up and bundled in a protected, quiet corner where they could all cling to each other in the dark in a mess of blankets and pillows like the children they were. Wanted to shield Elle from the watching eyes of the Justice League members, the clean up crew, the gawking civilians and hungry press. To protect her while she was so horribly vulnerable, her friend ripped open and bleeding out in front of the world like a sideshow and not a girl who had just lost the only people in the world that had known and loved her since the very beggining of her fucked up life.

But Lian was the leader of the Titans. She was the one they trusted to make the hard calls. To look after them. To be their champion against not just their enemies but their allies too when it was called for.

So that’s what she did.

She stood with her feet planted firm on the slick, broken ground. Spine straight, shoulders back, head high and gaze full of hellfire. A sentry between her confused, greiving friends and the good intentioned but ultimately distructive attempts of the Justice League members before her to help.

Lian’s arm was broken in at least two places, hanging limply at her side from a dislocated shoulder. Her weapons buried in the flesh of one monster or other that they had faced that night. Her poison tipped nails split and torn, fingernails missing entirely on three fingers of her left hand. Her mask was cracked and broken somewhere in the debris, leaving her only with a domino that had nearly been clawed off with the rest of her face. Blood going cool and tacky where it had poured down her ragged cheeks, settling in the hollows and lines around her mouth. Pinking her teeth whenever she spoke and the gruesome evidence of the brutal fight found its way to curl insideious in her mouth, down her throat, into the cold pit in her chest.

When she met her grandfather’s grim, obscured face it was with her mother’s strength and her father’s stubbornness and her Pops’ willingness to shoot any motherfucker who dared to try.

Clark’s gaze was on the hunched crowd behind her, tight lines on his face as he stared at his son making it all to clear that he wanted to move past her and insert himself into the situation. To use his everything will be okay voice to command them like confused civilians or lost ducklings in need of a minder. He wanted to play the part he always played in times of disaster: shining beacon, untarnished champion. The last thing her team wanted, the last thing that Elle needed on top of everything else.

Lian’s good hand flexed by the pistol strapped to her thigh in a small warning. The Man of Steel knew well enough that there was glowing green waiting for him in the clip. Her gramps’ obsessive paranoia, her Pops’ good advice about big blue boyscouts who couldn’t keep their noses out of of other people’s business.

They stood in tense silence for long moments, the stillness only broken by Elle’s broken voice rising up in a keening wail for those she lost.

A stand-off that Lian knew that she’d win, one way or another.

Her gramps’ shoulders lowered, so minutely as to be inperceptible to anyone not in their family.

“Wonder Woman will be here shortly.” He said in his low rumbling voice. Beside him Clark finally drifted to the ground, a concession from both of them. “Justice League Dark went radio silent seven hours ago. Last transmission from Zantanna indicated they were dealing with an interdimensional issue and would be unreachable for at least three days.”

Elle’s dad - her family - were unreachable. John Constantine didn’t know that he’d lost his three sons in the span of a handful of minutes, that his daughter was being crushed beneath the weight of greif and trauma to the point of madness. Wouldn’t know for days what tragedy had struck his family, had destroyed the strange but happy life he and his adopted children had carved out for themselves.

John Constantine. Zantanna Zatara. Detective Bobo. Boston Brand. Asa the Nightmare Nurse. Elle’s family, out of reach while she writhed and wailed in agony. The only people who might come close to understand just how deep, how awful, the pain of her brothers’ loss truly was.

Diana was something, was someone, but the Amazon’s time being split between JL Light and Dark meant that she wasn’t a touchstone to Elle in the way the rest of the core members of the magical team were. Elle commented once that Diana was more like a fun aunt she barely saw growing up. Someone she was always excited to see and hang out with, someone she wanted to make proud, but not someone she felt especially close to in comparison to the rest of her family.

Lian did not give in to the pained urge to close her eyes and swear.

She was keenly aware that all it would take was a single crack, as narrow and insignificant as a strand of hair. The smallest hint that the crushing weight of everything that had happened - that was still happening - was effecting her and they’d be back at the attempts to push past her and take over. A desire to help, the restless urge to jump in and save the day, to ease the pain of those so clearly suffering, blinding them to how much worse they would make things in the process.

The intentions were good, but the ultimate results blistering and painful and too often overlooked as the next disaster pulled thier attentions away. Stubborn insistence that their experience overruled her and her team’s instincts. The hands of the older heroes always reaching, unaware that they were too sharp as they dug into the soft flesh of the Titans’ fresh wounds. Picking apart their flaws and failures in the name of bettering them, never stopping to consider the wounds they pressed hard against as part of their lecturing might still be open and raw. That while the men before her had hands in raising most of them, that did not mean they had perfect comprehension to who the Titans were or always knew what the members of her team really needed.

“Have Wonder Woman go to the Tower.” Lian said, knowing that her grandfather heard Selina’s cadence in her voice. A habit, a gamble. Catwoman had been her mentor for a time, had helped her sharpen her claws and her instincts and that budding part of her that would make her a leader one day. Sometimes it pushed Bruce into listening to her, sometimes it just led to him pushing back.

He’d find that latter option unwise at the moment, though.

Her beloved Grand-Bat or no, she knew where his armor was weakest. Knew how to make the single shot she’d manage to get off on him count. Knew just how far she’d go to make sure that Elle and the rest of her friends were sheilded from any and all harm when they were so vulnerable.

She was their champion, their sentry, their knight.

Batman, of all people, knew the lengths a knight was willing to go in the name of the oaths they took.

She watched him shift back. A silent, unseen signal between him and Clark having Superman step back too. Lian wasn’t sure if her grandfather had found the wall she presented him too strong to conted with, or if Elle’s heart wrenching screams of greif and agony made him decide against testing the wall at all. Whatever it was, Lian would take the small victory where she could. It was the only real one she might be able to claim that day.

[feroluce]

Belobog was my fave main quest but a lot of it is so. Contradictory. It's like they had multiple groups doing different shit and none of them checked in with each other for consistency. And you see this so much in Gepard's profile.

So in the main quest, they made him unfailingly, unquestionably loyal to Cocolia. Gepard's character arc is him learning to question authority etc etc. And this isn't even a bad thing; that's a story worth telling! It makes good conflict between him and Serval! And I love that we got Gepard as a boss battle and I get to see him all the time in SU!

But then you look at his character stories and it's like. The complete opposite.

According to his profile, Gepard has already HAD this awakening, long before the Astral Express, and he'd already decided Cocolia sucks. Even outside of his stories, there's a pretty damning readable between him and Pela.

He even disobeyed direct orders right in front of her- he has been disobeying orders for a while now!

So I've decided I'm marrying the two different sides of this into a 1.5k fic-ish thingy, because I think there's some fun potential there with Gepard not trusting Cocolia, but still having to pretend to be a good obedient little soldier.

Anyway. I love to think of it as like. Gepard knows Cocolia has sunk into her apathy. He can see it in her eyes every time he looks at her. She doesn't care. Not about him, not about Pela, not about all his soldiers on the frontlines giving their lives to protect the citizens. And that's... It makes him bristle a bit, but ok. Gepard can deal with this. Even if Cocolia no longer cares, as long as she does her job then it's fine. Having compassion behind an action doesn't matter as much as the action itself. If Cocolia's heart is no longer swayed, then he'll just have to care twice as hard to pick up the slack. He considers it part of his duty as a captain of the guard anyway. It's fine. Gepard can deal with it.

And then, Cocolia starts coming down to the restricted zone. Issuing direct orders.

And Gepard realizes he is in way over his head.

Because Cocolia orders him to stay back and issue commands from the ramparts, away from all his comrades, away from where he can protect them.

Gepard had thought nothing could be as bad as watching a fellow guard die right next to him. But the first time he watches someone struck by a killing blow, so far away, it hurts. Every defensive scar across his arms itches, his fingers curl in want of a weapon, the cold cannot numb his hands enough as they desperately ache for his shield. It hurts.

Gepard tries to find any reason to stay. Because surely... He knows Cocolia has lost her love for her people, but surely... She wouldn't...

One day, Cocolia orders for their gunners to advance 20 yards. There are no survivors. She almost looks like she smiles.

Gepard doesn't sleep that night.

Pela brings him the report at the end of the first month; and then the month after that, and the month after that. A significant uptick in losses, and all of it started on that first day Cocolia started overriding his authority and issuing her own orders. The ends of Gepard's pens have all been nearly chewed off. Pela outright calls Cocolia an idiot, and Gepard corrects her. Cocolia isn't an idiot. Gepard had known her through Serval, knew her through all her college years and then some, and he knows how intelligent she is. It's not that she's stupid, and it's not that she's inexperienced, it's nothing of the sort.

Cocolia knows exactly what she's doing.

She must, there's no way she could make such a horrible mess of things so badly by accident. And Pela, quick as a whip, sharp as a tack, always too smart for her own good, catches onto the meaning behind Gepard's correction without any further prompting. The tent goes deathly quiet, nothing but the wind howling outside.

"...She's trying to kill us," Pela whispers, her voice swiftly suffocated by the silence.

Gepard swallows. He can't bring himself to correct her this time. There is nothing he could say that he would actually mean.

His gaze drops, back down to his desk and the reports on it. The names aren't listed, just the numbers, but Gepard knows them, knew them, and there must be something wrong, something he's missing, because why, why would she-? What could this possibly accomplish-?

“Gepard! Focus!” Something snaps right under his nose, and Gepard startles, eyes instantly honing in on Pela's irritated face as she leans over his desk. She holds his gaze for a moment before she huffs and begins to pace, wedges a knuckle between her teeth and bites like Gepard hasn't seen her do since cadet school.

Pela angrily strides from one end of his tent to the other, words hissed between her grit teeth. “What are we going to do?” In the dim lighting, Gepard can just barely see the damp spot of blood weeping under her gloves. “We need a plan.”

“A plan?”

“Wh- Yes, a plan! Unless you want more people to die!” Pela rounds on him then, all the wrath of a blizzard, winds roaring and snow sharp enough to cut.

“We don't even know-”

“What does it matter?! She killed-!!” Pela cuts off with a garbled noise when Gepard leaps up from his desk, hastily shoves his hand over her mouth. The prosthetic, not the flesh one, because he knows better than to assume Pela won't seize the opportunity to leave teeth marks in his skin.

“You're right. I'm sorry, I'm sorry; you're right. But you need to keep quiet.” Pela quirks an eyebrow at him and Gepard can read the question in her face. “Because we both saw what she did to Serval,” he hisses.

It's amazing the snow plains haven't thawed out yet, the amount of heat Pela can put behind a glare. The mere mention of Serval, and the smoking ruins Cocolia had made of her life and career, have her bristling up like a riled cat. The sudden hot breath she takes fans fog across his metal skin, and Gepard wisely keeps it in place until Pela finally sighs and reaches up, taps her fingertips against the back of his hand.

The second she's free, Pela bats him away and then her knuckle is right back between her teeth again, Gepard leaning back against his desk with his arms crossed to watch her resume her pacing. “If we spread the word, she'll have us discharged and make sure we can't even touch the frontlines,” Pela's voice seethes like an open sore. Gepard nods but keeps his silence. He knows better than to get in her way.

“And if you and I are both out of the picture, Belobog is fucked.” A little harsher than how he would have put it, but there's no denying that they're both important to the city's survival. Pela has the restricted zone running as efficiently as ever, and Gepard had become the youngest captain on record for a reason. “We need to keep this tight under wraps, at least for now… It can't leak to anyone higher up the chain.” Another nod. “Serval might know other discontents…” Another n-

Gepard's head snaps up. “No.”

“No what?”

“No. We're not involving Serval in this.”

Somehow, even the same tone that leaves entire squadrons shaking in their boots has never worked on her. “You're not deciding that for her, Gepard.”

Pela hadn't seen the worst of it, though, back when his sister had just been banned from the Architects. Serval's pride hadn't allowed it. Pela wasn't the one to find her passed out bottle still in hand, hadn't been the one to wash the sick out of her hair or carry her to bed. 

Serval still has trouble thinking clearly when it comes to Cocolia, still can't quite bring herself to be objective. And Gepard maybe doesn't want her to be purely objective- but he would worry a lot less if she thought twice before she acted more often.

“At least let me be the one to bring it up to her.”

“Whatever, fine,” Pela gestures affirmatively at him as she paces past, and Gepard sighs. Good, at least that's one thing he can help.

From there, it's a lot of hemming and hawing and frustration. Cocolia has them under her boot, and Gepard and Pela both know it. Even with the way she's been cracking down on freedoms lately, Cocolia is still, overall, liked by the people. It's unlikely anyone would believe them. They don't even have solid proof, because most people don't know Cocolia as well as they do and won't see the clues in the same light. 

The Fragmentum has been ramping up in recent years, too. Everyone is struggling just to survive as is, they can't afford a fight on two fronts. Gepard is a damn good captain, one of the best for that matter. But they're at a massive disadvantage, his experience is narrowed to fighting a defensive battle against monsters, that's all he's ever done. That's all anyone there has ever done. He has no way of finding first-hand knowledge for taking the offensive against a human opponent, and if he goes at this blind, there's no way he'll get everyone out unscathed. He's going to lose people. He's going to lose a lot of people.

He'd never thought before that Cocolia would have it in her to have someone killed. And with this new knowledge, he has no guarantee she won't go after Serval or Lynx if she decides to retaliate.

Gepard has to remind himself to breathe when he realizes this.

Pela writes down every name the two of them can come up with. Lists and lists of names and groups and anyone they can think of who might be an ally in all of this. They memorize every bit of it, make their plans of who to talk to and when. Gepard watches the sparks reflect off Pela's glasses as they burn the evidence together.

Pela finally leaves, far too late to make it home, but says she wants to stay in the restricted zone anyway to investigate. Gepard watches her make her way in the direction of Dunn's tent, watches her back until she's out of his sight and squashes down the urge to follow and keep an eye on her. His tent feels empty.

In the morning, Gepard is up before the wake up bells. He drags himself out of bed, leads his soldiers through their morning training. The same people gravitate to each other everyday. Friend groups and training partners. There's an ongoing rivalry between a few squadrons that everyone bets on. Some of them have lockets around their necks, keepsakes, mementos. Some of them wear wedding rings.

Gepard is suddenly, painfully aware of something acidic clawing at the inside of his throat, of a heavy weight low in his chest that blooms, takes up room until it threatens to spread his ribs. His mouth tastes of bile and blood.

He rearranges the schedules. Puts himself down for every open patrol into the Fragmentum, makes sure he'll be on the frontlines every single time Cocolia visits.

He only hopes that it's enough.