#she's so high above me
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i'm thinking abt fig and specifically "the second you see her you're gonna feel like yourself again. i get it, your girlfriend's out of town, it sucks"
it's like. fig's fear in the nightmare forest, that everyone loves the illusion of her and not the real her, that no one wants to hear a bass player solo. the one person in the world she has irrefutable proof that that's not true for, who she saw sees the real her with her own eyes, is ayda. ayda, who is gone and traveling across time.
and in the meantime, fig doubles down on helping her friends. she focuses on helping kristen and cassandra, helping riz with the mystery, solving things for the bad kids. she becomes a paladin because she's so devoted to her friends. that conversation she has with sandra lynn where she says she feels nauseous when asked about herself but so excited about other people. "i don't even wanna exist." sandra lynn suggests she asks the bad kids what they think of her and fig says no, she doesn't want to. it's scary to her.
and it's just... fig doesn't want to think about herself and she doesn't want to try to figure out what her friends think of her either. she's so content to focus on them, and almost everything she's done this season is for her friends. in rp and also mechanically-- becoming a paladin, focusing on mystery and fucking with ruben in the downtime, even just... going to school. she's doing that for the bad kids.
and she looks at ankarna, who has been corrupted by the things other people wanted her to be. the bad kids' influence on fig is positive, but it could just have easily been not, if she had different friends. if she was dedicated to people who weren't trying to do good.
"what do you think happens when i wear off and ayda notices the real you?" "i hope she finds something that i didn't know was there."
there's one person fig knows for a fact has always seen through the illusions of her, and sees something worthy of love. and she's out of town. so she gets it. it's hard.
#fantasy high junior year spoilers#fhjy#fhjylb#hanbles#i'm not sure why i am thinking so hard abt this today#i think maybe it's the fact that to me.#fig doesn't see ankarna as like... A Deity who is above mortals#she sees someone so very much like her#if she had gone down a different path#consumed by the illusion of her-- the version who is created for others
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I love singNsong again reminding people in Side Story that Dokja wanted other people to read TWSA (he wrote reviews and comments! It was his first wish), and he only stopped bothering because people harassed him for it. He didn't gate-keep the story. When he's avoiding talking to Sangah about it at the beginning of ORV, it's because he knows what happens when he tells people about the story, not because he's gate-keeping it from her. He notes he's not proud of his hobby (likely because he's been bullied all through his life, including for reading the thing he loves): he finds it embarrassing to talk about, and better respects her studying Spanish in her free time (learning another language is a generally accepted thing in society). He assumes she won't care or will look at him funny (or worse) for when she learns about the novel he's into.
Basically anyone writing "let's gatekeep ORV" posts because of the anime announcement or because they dislike the manhwa or some other weirdness, y'all are the villains in the scenario.
The literal climax of the story is about sharing ORV with as many people as possible. What story were y'all reading?
#orv#really tired of the stupid gate-keepy bs in some parts of this fandom#omniscient reader's viewpoint#kim dokja#side story spoilers#it's been quite fascinating seeing novel fanatics come out of the woodwork against potential anime fans#while showing how much they hate the manhwa and manhwa fans too#the only actual official English translation we have is the manhwa#acting like we're all in this together like no#I adore the novel and the manhwa#and folks who started with the manhwa or just happen to also like the manhwa but also like the novel see you for what you are#avoiding talking about something is not gatekeeping#it's often recognizing various social cues#like oh this person probably isn't familiar and I don't care to explain#or I'm worried they'll treat me badly if they know#when you're trying to connect with someone you tend to look for things you share not stuff you don't#if Dokja heard about people trying to gatekeep orv he would be disgusted#also NOT gatekeeping orv is literally the climax of the story I am so deeply confused by people encouraging gatekeeping of it#you're making han suyeong mad#she didn't nearly kill herself writing orv in order to share it to everyone they could find so people could gatekeep it#that is literally the opposite of the goal#it's not bad to ask if folks have read the novel because for a variety of reasons folks may not have#but it is bad to act like reading the novel is a fandom requirement especially given all we have is a fantranslation using MTL#or you must love the novel above others or the novel only#I want singnsong to get fucking rich from this story they shared and which I and many adore#gatekeeping does not make that happen#also good luck getting people to buy the Yen Press novel translation when it comes out when you act like this#the manhwa is available in at least seven languages officially fuck off with this gatekeeping crap#don't get me started how a lot of y'all don't even know what twatf is and a good chunk of y'all who won't even touch it when you do know#and that doesn't exactly bother me but it does bug me when book purists get all high and mighty
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Well instead of the cancelled date, my new regular friend (that I met through a friend of a friend) swung by to hang out for a few hours instead. And honestly? Just as good if not better of a time. It's been so dang long since I made a new friend! We just sat and smoked and talked and it felt so wonderfully at ease. I didn't even feel obligated to wear a bra lol
Also she had never heard of Bill and Ted?? So I loaned her my copies of the first two movies, and showed her my small collection of B&T art and memorabilia, while feeling like a bit of a huge dork.
#good things#new friend#bill and ted#realizing that i have an above average amount of bill and ted memorabilia (i.e. any at all lol)#anyway I'm glad i have a new pal#she's the gf of my friend's friend and I met her at their bbq on the 4th#then i ended up protecting her from a creepy fucker at a wedding in august so now we're basically besties#she's the one who's been helping me with dating app stuff#lol apparently her partner told her to be careful smoking with me because I have an unnaturally high tolerance 😂#which is true but also mostly they only see me at parties when I'm chain smoking joints to deal with my anxiety#so perhaps a skewed vision of my regular weed smoking habits#life of faye
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i’ve come to the conclusion after watching heartbreak high, that personally i will forgive and defend characters for being unhinged and insane (rowan) or even just cunts if they have redeemable qualities (probably most of the cast but particularly amerie and harper and yes spider too now) but i will NOT stand characters that are fucking annoying (sasha ,,, srsly my girl quinni did NOT deserve that!!!!)
#y’all could NOT make me hate amerie#she bullied someone for liking ed sheeran and i became a permanent stan sorry#does she have flaws?? absolutely. they are flashing neon signs above her head#unfortunately doesn’t stop me. she’s too cool and funny#also harper is an icon. an asshole but an icon#i feel like i’m gonna have issues in this fandom bc i live in a yellowjackets hole#and i’ve gotten used to overlooking flaws in fictional characters (bc everyone is a cannibal)#so anyways catch me being an amerie harper and rowan defender ✌️#(spider will be fending for himself until s3 but i am rooting for him)#also can we get a shoutout for the ace rep??? the autism rep????#remind me to make another post focusing on quinni she’s one of my favs#another day another autistic girl i’m in love with#heartbreak high#heart break high#hbh#hbh s2#hbh spoilers#harper mclean#amerie wadia#rowan callaghan#sasha so#spencer spider white#<3
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have a transparent Silver :) you can make him sit on anything you want now!
Awww, thank you!🍀💕 Such a polite boi!
#Now I want to draw him in a field of flowers with a blue sky above him but I am not sure if my IbisPaint skills are high enough for that#silver the hedgehog#idw sonic#also this is how I always sit when I'm sitting on the ground since I find it uncomfortable to tuck my legs underneath me#that or I sit like Blaze like how she sits beside Silver in the respective panel this picture comes from#so I fully approve of this sitting pose lol!
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Considering that we're gonna be entering Natlan in the next nation of genshin. I have a few words I wanna say on it.
On one hand, I'm so happy we're finally gonna see Capitano and learn about all the new lore, ect!
But on the other hand, I'm really nervous on what hoyoverse is going to be doing with the people in the nation considering the treatment with Sumeru and the fact that Natlan is inspired off of West African cultures and Latin America.
But considering the character designs of Vannessa and Iansan, I have some(what) faith in hoyo (fingers crossed!)
#I don't have much high hopes in hoyo (other than my delulu thoughts but that's on me) but I have some trust in hoyo...#Not much considering Vannessa is a bit light skinned but like I said above. I have some faith in hoyo#Plus. Iansan's design looks promising#Tbh I feel like hoyo will make black characters. Just really light skinned....#Take that above tag with a grain of salt since I have no clue what hoyoverse is going to do#Tbh take this whole post as a grain of salt. BUT TAKE IT#Hoyo.... please I am fucking beggging you#genshin impact#genshin#genshin natlan#natlan#hoyoverse#edit: I recently saw like two leaks of the Pyro archon and while she was white.... it looked super fake#so I still have some hope but idk#one of them was her whole outfit and it looked like it was from an entirely different game#also I'm pretty sure it was a design for a different scrapped character + it was probably an old sketch even if it was the pyro archon#also also. It was confirmed a while ago that 99% of the natlan leaks were fake#so this could also totally be fake
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(Color guard rant of the month) knowing I’m going to be captain next year scares the shit out of me when I see my current captain (who did dance for years) pick up advanced sabre choreography in a half hour and know the correct counts to it when I could barely REMEMBER the first third 💀 that’s what I get when I joined freshmen year with no dance/choreography background. I clawed my way up over the course of three years and disregarded my mental health so many times to be where I am but still will forever lack the natural talent some people have. And that fact makes me truly upset sometimes
#vent#the worst part is that she only has one season over me too#my school didn’t have winterguard her freshmen year#and she still is so many leagues above me#in everything from toss rotations to memorization to leadership to versatility#I want to be captain. I want to leave high school knowing I’m the sole surviving member from my freshmen class#who sucked my first year but put in enough work that by my senior year I’m the most advanced on the team#but sometimes it just feels like I’m never going to be good or sheerly dedicated enough to rise to the task#it gives me so much anxiety#colorguard#color guard#winterguard#winter guard#marching band#lyn rambles#lyn rants
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If you're not having any kind of joint pain today, take a second to thank your body..... And do some stretching RIGHT NOW.
#my right hip has been in so much pain for about three weeks now. i was determined to not let it slow me down on vacation but now that im#home and have less distractions it is KILLING ME!!!!#im gonna talk to my physical therapist about it tomorrow and probably make a doctors appointment unless she can figure out whats up with it.#ive tried EVERYTHING too. I'm doing all the different hip stretches every day. ibuprofen like candy. alternating heat and ice. resting it as#much as possible while still getting light exercise. nothing is really helping.#i have a hunch its something to do with going from out of shape to loving running on the treadmill in a month and a half.....#sudden high joint impact exercise for several hours a week after being inactive for a while you know? maybe i overdid it#but im worrying its something else like arthritis or iliopsoas issues or something because i havent stepped onto a treadmill in like two#weeks now and its not really getting better. so i think something is up.#side note: common advice for joint pain is to elevate the joint above the heart and rest like that..... how the fuck am i supposed to#elevate my hips above my heart???? i cant find a good explanation of how to do that#without bwing upside down i guess lol
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get yourself a cat who will smack you impatiently, then once you pick her up she sprawls on your back to groom herself, and five minutes later gets up to Sneeze 3x in your freshly washed hair
#this cat i swear to fucking god. shes so Funny#she literally. sometimes when shes impatient she'll do the stretchy reachy thing#but this time she just. reared up and smacked me with both paws. and claws#then she had the AUDACITY to sit there looking at me like i personally spayed her#until i picked her up. then she did the above#like GIRL#i had to put my pizza away while hunched tf over#she has too much personality. like put some Back#(kidding. shes perfect (a menace))#absolutely unprompted#and then she immediately did something Else that was hysterical#i put the pizza away i refilled my water#then i was gonna go back to my room and she was sitting there looking at me with a Very displeased expression#very clearly being like 'am i invited into your room. youve kicked me out twice today. am i Allowed. huh.'#so i passive aggressively stuck my arm out a la ~After You Your Esteemed Highness~#and she. she IMMEDIATELY leapt up and galloped to my room#WHO GAVE HER THE RIGHT-#swear to fuck a wizard turned her into a cat. she's too Human#which i would fully believe if i hadn't taken her from her mother myself as a teeny kitten#Wow That Sounds Fucking Mean lmfao#but god damn. tonight she has quite the Attitude#on another note i just had to kill a spider on my freshly washed rug. which i washed last night bc i had to kill a Different spider on it#i think i scrubbed the Residue out well enough#either way im not going through the ordeal of rug washing again#i need a different one. i still Really want a cowhide rug. ill settle for fake ikea wool for now
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Tuvok’s Vulcan Facebook would just be plant growth progress reports, pictures of his kids and then massively reblogged Vulcan quotes like (picture of Surakian Texts) “This book will either keep you from illogic...or illogic will keep you from this book.”
#His kids are like daaaaaad no one'seven ON Vulcan facebook anymore.........#pulling from my own experience where whenever I did something mildly impressive in high school my mom would be so excited#and say she was gonna tell all her friends! mildly embarrassing but also a warm feeling <3#Vulcan facebook is notoriously difficult to use and signing up + liking a post is actually the beginniner hacking course in most#federation (non Vulcan majority) colleges. It's very old programming and nearly incomprehensible if you're not Vulcan#if you ARE Vulcan it's just mildly cumbersome. Unless you're above a certain age and then it's no problem at all.#Tuvok being the Vulcan version of the most normal suburban dad...it treats me right -nodnod-#st voyager#Tuvok
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thinking about making a pack au where they actually stick closer to hyenas than whatever the fuck they did in that episode
bc uh he-LLO? hyenas are like... one of the BIG popular matriarchal animals and we just acted like xander was all scary now? pshh. I mean he was hyenas are scary but buffy is absolutely highest rank top dog here no wayyy he'd be all scary to her since they're already y'know a "pack" of sorts. like I'm pretty sure he'd still defer to her. plus willow! her making friends with buffy first and just generally being a girl he'd rank below her as well (though I do wonder where his stance with giles would be)
and I get that xander already sorta had a new clan with the other possessed kids but even then why was HE at the top of that hierarchy?? in fact it was so barely structured at all I'm only assuming xander was a high rank bc he's just one of our mains. and the shot of them all walking ofc where he was front and center I can read basic filmmaking choices lol
but also hyenas have FRIENDS! they have cliques and groups within their own clan. isn't that so cool? why did they just disregard xander's friendship with the scoobies? I think the fact xander had friends and quite loyal ones is like important? I mean okay I suppose it's all he's in this clan now he's cut ties with the scoobies, but to me at least I think that's kinda boring haha. though actually even if xander had the support of the scoobies, with how that clan were already a group before xander and not with xander at all, he'd actually probably be like real goddamn low anyways instead of more equal like it was shown
look I really have no idea about any of this I've just been looking up hyena facts for the past hour bc I thought it was neat. I simply think they should've done more with this instead of oo look xander's all feral and evil when they literally chose hyena to be their animal. like ooookay then whateverrrr lame
#they should've just done wolves or smth why the hell did they pick hyenas if they weren't even gonna play with their more unique structure#btw PACK? not CLAN? guys seriously re see above they just wanted to be different while still riding off of wolf girls#buffy IS the leader. highest of the high. top rank here. she's the alpha female since that is apparently what they're called lol#I just don't see why xander would Act like he did in that episode if we we're going off of hyenas and not some other predator#even if we go off the idea he broke ties with the scoobs as outsider females I think both wils and buff r still doing better than him#ANYWAYS. that's my two cents this episode was silly and I wish they'd had more fun playing with the animal they chose#someone with more spotted hyena knowledge should talk to me I'd LOVE to learn more I think these animals are so fucking cool#xander harris#btvs#buffy the vampire slayer#alright I did a little more googling and interesting! xander and wil might outdo buffy in the whole friendship department#so I THINK their clan WOULD have a far more level playing field simply because of how close everyone is. neat neat neat!#but buffy could still kick their asses be fr
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a starstruck odyssey is for lovers
#more than acofaf even. the love story of the wurst is what dreams are made of#emilymurph sitting next to each other...skip straightest man ever prince of alien slugs learning to be free bc of the crew...gnosis...#best on average npcs. lucienne plug bambi leroux the butch at the space station fuckin space heiress trust fund baby bajar crunch moon jone#and this is not to say ANYTHING of how good the characters are.#they could keep making d20 seasons forever and starstruck will always be a cut above the rest because of how fucking good the setting is#like with crown of candy even tho i loved it sm i feel like some politics were discarded in favor of the others; all out war was eh to me#the build up to a war tho? now that's interesting that's where the juice is basically i wanted asoiaf book one vibes with this cast but#that's a matter of personal preference! i don't feel like acoc did the most that could've been done with a “politics” campaign#dimension 20#dropout.tv#a starstruck odyssey#because of their deep investment in the world and the genre it never feels like starstruck couldn't do anything. it feels limitless!#season two...god if they never do one that'd be such wasted capability#ik fantasy high is so beloved and it is a beautiful lasagna of time and playing style but if i could get multiple seasons w starstruck...#the thing that makes asoiaf asoiaf is that we have a similar level of insight into the minds of baddies like the lannisters as we do into#the minds of the clean jesus allegory starks. and in acoc the “worst” character we got from the heroes was lapin n even he was aligned#to the rocks' cause. saccharina WAS a rocks -- that was her whole deal -- and even then she wasn't a morally reproachable character bc#she was right! i wanted acoc to be down and dirty and when they said ravening would be i was excited but even that turned out to be them#destroying a secret cult which was going to kill the world. no really down low shenanigans!
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why does everything have to be a hecking issue with my sister
#she keeps getting on my case about the Theatre Boy thing which I would just like to hecking leave in the past#she keeps getting on my case bc I wear short shorts and spaghetti strap tank tops AROUND THE HOUSE AS LOUNGE CLOTHES#she's like DO YOU EVEN CARE ABOUT MODESTY and I'm like YOU WALK AROUND IN SHORTS AND A SPORTS BRA ALL THE TIME#(possibly bc I thought I could get away with wearing lounge clothes with a long shawl thing overtop the other day to worship practice#but I did in fact change my trousers after my mama pointed out that it wasn't super modest)#she keeps making comments about how I do inappropriate stuff on my phone bc I... watch one(1) sitcom?????#shows like that are IRREVERENT AS HECK like come on of course I'm not going to be totally open with my kid sister about them#I am an ADULT I can make my own choices about what content I will put up with in media#I can make my own choices about clothing if I think my mom's idea of ''anything more than an inch above the knee#is immodest'' is silly and restrictive for my body shape and comfort level personally#like... why does she have to act so high and mighty around me? she's in MIDDLE SCHOOL and I know I haven't always been the nicest to her#but I'm making the effort. I'm trying to get along with her and what I get is disdain on the daily in return :/#our mom said it's probably bc she was hoping I wouldn't move back in so she'd have our room to herself and now she's mad#that I'm back bc she has to share a space again and like I KNOW middle school ages SUCK I've BEEN THERE#but still I just. want to get along. but she picks on me and then I get frustrated and then I snap at her and it just doesn't end well#it's a nasty cycle tbh. I'm praying about it.#Lu rambles#personal#delete later
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At roughly 4 to 5am one of the cats decided to climb on top of the shelves right above my head where i sleep. Shelves that we put there specifically bc they couldn't reach them. (They grew since then. They can now...) And I was rudely woken up by a lego succulent that was on display hitting me right in the head.
The little shits have mastered verticality and I'm hating it.
Anyways. Anybody have any recommendations of museum putty for displayed lego sets? (Bc anything that isn't plastic isn't out in the open bc of them.)
#taks speaks#my ceramics are in one spot specifically in a glass cabinet#and literally nothing but lego and plush are actually out#i have been hit multiple times by my shelf sitting cyndaquil plush but that hurts far less#that was at least from them just reaching up and bapping at the shelf#they stand in the window sill and just reach#but now. somehow. they have gotten past the wall of cyndaquil. knocking everything on the shelf over in their path#to reach the highest point of the bedroom: the top of the cabinet/shelf that i have as a bedside table#what scared me the most when i woke up wasn't a pile of green legos but the fact#that the squirtle ditto plush that was shoved between the cabinet and the plush net above was sitting hauntingly perfectly beside my head#it's plain faced smile just staring back at me as i'm wondering wtf just hit my head#how did it land perfectly like this? idk. but i swear i had a moment of thinking halfawake where i thought it was posessed#the cats really want to be in the nook between the cabinet and plush net#i can't blame them. it's high up and it's covered#but it's how they get up there and how it's right over my head#and due to the rise in infiltrating wolf spiders in the apartment we don't want to kick them out of the bedroom#so they can hunt the one we lost behind the shelf#which bean had last night btw but dropped it#and bc it ran under the door she was so focused on behind the door so i picked her up and put her facing it from like 3 inches away#and she turns quickly to go back behind the door#so i grab eek and do the same but she just stared at it and watched as it ran behind the shelf#they aren't doing their job. and they're waking me up very rudely
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I now know the context for the 'Doctor... you're huge' line
#prince's gaming tag#hi can i ramble for a bit? bc im losing my mind and i didnt screenshot that scene bc i was too focused on what was happening#so like i got to control both characters in this pic for a bit mainly aventurine and he was summoned by Sunday for a negotiation#or so we thought but Sunday wanted to know what his plans were and casted Harmony on him#and then asked him some questions where if he lied there would be dire consequences#and that whole fucking scene had me TENSE like holy shit#and then it was revealed aventurine was lying and it turns out Sunday knew this bc Ratio ratted him out!!!#so it wasnt an negotiation or an interrogation but an execution like aventurine said#so now unless he does what sunday wants hes gonna die in 17 system hours#and like. holy fucking shit. holy shit!!!!#like ok im still kinda confused about the lore of the game and what actually the aeons are and the factions and all that#like theyll say some unfamiliar word and therell be a word above it like its explaining what that word means#but its just another in universe word so im still confused#but with this interrogation scene i got enough of what was going on to get the high stakes#and im just like AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA rn in my head bc what the fuuuuuuuuck#now i wonder if this is gonna be why he becomes a boss fight for us#oh also i was right. when aventurine is serious his voice isnt as grating to me so its only when he's forcing his facade that i cant take i#but this interrogation scene was really fucking good#anyway i finished aventurine's pov and im back to trailblazer's pov. I get to see Topaz!!#who i havent met before but apparently the crew has. i guess i didnt do the mission where she was introduced oops#but i hadnt heard her voice before so i thought it was higher pitched and was very glad to hear it wasnt#oh and i gotta pull for aventurine when he comes back bc i need someone who can cast shield on everyone and hes the man for it#the only preservation character i have is march and caelus if i choose that path but i need him on another one rn so march is the main one#but she can only put up one shield at a time which is not enough as the fights get harder
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