#she's older than me but just really immature and it's so frustrating

[slippery-minghus]

*sighs* made it home ok and now have a purring lump on my lap. i took a panic pill as soon as i got home and i think it's helping. after how stressful work was and then electrolysis, i'm feeling post-meltdown exhaustion. i got a little food in me but i'm just so tired. i really hope tomorrow's a better day.

[blackbullet99]

Debunking The Stupidest Pro-Zutara Claims.

Howdy y’all.

If you follow me, you know I’m a Kataang truther and a Zutara hater. I always thought Kataang was cute as a kid, but I honestly didn’t appreciate how mutual and well developed their relationship more until I was older. By contrast, I didn’t think much of Zutara initially, I knew it had a huge following and I kinda got why, they have a very interesting dynamic that drastically changes and them becoming friends is heartwarming, but I never got the hype. Then I saw this…

And I was utterly baffled at the mischaracterization, media-illiteracy, Zuko dickriding and Aang demonization on this post. Let’s have a look…

See what I mean about the Zuko dickriding and Aang demonizing. You compare one scene of Zuko making tea for everyone in Book 3, to Aang showing off in Book 1. Need I mention that Aang later apologized for getting big-headed by the end, and later episodes show that Aang (and the rest of the group) all work together. Right off the bat and we get this dumb Katara/Cinderella narrative.

Not another Dadko. Momtara I kind of get, but Zuko is not a father figure. Zuko himself is still young, still growing, still capable of being immature. The first moment isn’t even a parental thing, it’s more Zuko stopping Katara from confronting Aang because he somewhat understands Aang’s frustration of being unsure and conflicting about a huge decision, because he’s been there not long ago.

Comforting someone when they’re worried or grieving isn’t parental responsibility, that’s being empathetic and good friend. Katara comforts Zuko when he’s worried about comforting Iroh and these people lap that scene up.

“Aang acts like Katara’s son” is such a baseless argument. Ignoring the fact that Aang canonically has romantic feelings for Katara and vise-verse, the first moment was a one-off joke about Katara being motherly, the second was also a joke where Katara PRETENDS to be Aang’s mom and her brother’s husband, the last moment is Katara telling Toph how she TRAINS Aang because she’s his Sifu and so it Toph, does that mean Toph is also Aang’s mom?

Let’s go over this for the umpteenth time: Aang kissing Katara was wrong, it was bad, we should’ve seen him apologize, but he immediately regretted what he did, he knew he messed up, he’s not a sexual-assaulter, blah, blah blah. The problem with this is that these are both completely different situations and also Zuko had to be told to get off Katara, so not only is this point meaningless, but it doesn’t even support Zutara.

This has gotta be one of the dumbest arguments here, Aang has always seen Katara as an ally and dear friend first and foremost since day one. Admittedly Aang was somewhat possessive here, but him nodding mean he literally though Katara was his possession, more so him thinking Katara returned his feelings (which she did). But throughout the entirety of the show Aang sees Katara as not only an ally, but a friend, a fellow waterbender, Zuko only saw her as a friend and ally near the very end of the show, before that he simply saw her as a peasant in the way of his goal.

Again, both of these are completely different contexts and both Aang and Zuko were pretty adamant about how Katara feels about them. Zuko frustratingly confronts Katara about why she’s mad it him, he wants to earn to trust and sleep deprives himself so he can resolve this as soon as she wakes up. Katara asks why Aang is so crestfallen, he explains part of the reason, Aang (while being somewhat pushy) wants to know how Katara feels before he confronts Ozai in life or death.

Both are different situations and really I wouldn’t say either is better than the other.

Okay, there’s a lot wrong with these points, lemme go over them as best as I can.

Aang has put his needs over Katara’s several times, just to name three: he gave himself so the Fire Nation would spare her home, was willing to forgo his own Waterbending because Pakku wouldn’t train her, willingly put aside mastering the Avatar State because SHE WAS IN DANGER!

Aang understands the importance of Katara’s family, he leaves so as to to come between Katara and her family when she threatens to leave, he brings back her necklace knowing how much it means to her.

In both of mentioned Aang instances, he realized he was wrong and he and Katara reconciled, the first instance was out of a misguided attempt to set things right after he was killed, and the former is something Aang would never do again, in a later episode he actively takes Sokka to his father and Aang is content for he and Katara to go their separate ways for a while. I find it utterly hypocritical to be a Zuko dickrider while bashing Aang for mistakes he regrets, apologizes for and learns from, you know who else does that?

Once again, THE CONTEXT! In the first scene Katara mentions her mother’s death in a more matter of fact way to explain to Aang that the Fire Nation have killed a lot of people including his own. Aang however in a state of denial dismissed the idea of his own people being killed. In the second scene Katara lashes out at Zuko for all the trouble he caused and Zuko after going through some development prior empathizes with her in a way to get Katara to understand he means no harm.

Aang also empathized with Katara’s loss. In this same episode, he himself says he knows what it’s like to feel the pain and rage Katara feels, specifically when he found out all his people were dead and encouraged Katara to confront the person who caused said pain.

I REALLY HATE making a Katara centric episode about shipping, I really do, many people say Zuko was right Aang was wrong, or Aang was right Zuko was wrong. Neither side was entirely right or entirely wrong.

Zuko was right to take Katara to confront Yon-Rha and this was when he truly began to understand what Katara had been through and see her as an individual, while Katara comes to see Zuko as a friend and forgive him, however he had no idea what Katara was going to do and didn’t think of toll this would take on Katara if she did end up choosing violence.

Meanwhile Aang not agreeing with Katara and confronting her isn’t a bad thing, he understands just what it’s like to lose someone close to you and to feel unbridled rage and hate, he’s been there, he also knows Katara isn’t cold-hearted and she could come to regret seeking violence. He actively encourages Katara to face Yon-Rha without killing him, which she does and as Zuko says he was right about what Katara needed. But as Katara points out she didn’t forgive Yon-Rha, forgiveness wasn’t the right choice, and you know what, this is something Aang accepts.

These points in particular really highlight the stupidity and hypocrisy of the OP. For one, as we can literally see Aang ignored his training specifically because Katara was in danger and he wanted to save her, this is no different from Zuko sacrificing himself to save Katara, in fact Aang has put his life on the line for Katara multiple times. Furthermore OP gets on Aang’s case for leaving Katara to fulfill his duties in the Book 3 premiere, but then praises Zuko for leaving Mai to fulfill his duties. They’re literally praising Zuko for doing the same stuff Aang’s doing and whining about Aang whether he chose to ignore his duties to be with Katara or if he leaves Katara to fulfill his duties, you can’t win!

Okay, screw this guy, this has nothing to do with the Zuko saving Katara, OP just wanted to bitch about Aang not wanting to kill Ozai as if this supposedly makes him selfish even though Aang is literally facing Ozai to save the world and is simply trying to find a peaceful solution, it’s like the theme of this show was lost on this dude.

This was the creep who made weird comments about Katara’s appearance wasn’t it.

I really don’t get what this final point is trying to prove. The first scene is Katara happy that Zuko is alive, the second is Katara happily gazing at Aang, who never at any point tried to change Katara, at all. Point me to one scene, one moment. If this is about how Katara looks, she doesn’t look that different, at the very least, her eyes are slightly bigger in the second pic because she close to someone she loves, but even then it’s a lot of whining from this guy about nothing.

Case in point, this is when I realized Anti-Kataang Zutara shippers have are media-illiterate morons with not a single good take, fake-fans who only care about mischaracterization for the sake of a mid middle-school ship.

Maybe I should make a counter post about what Katara gains from Kataang.

[2kyo7]

𝐂𝐀𝐈𝐌; 𝟎𝟓

metkayina!reader x avatar 2

THE SHORE HAD BECOME tiny after yourself and Tuk had swam such a great distance to reach the destination. At first you'd grown worried about going so far, even with your skills you didn't want her to tire out halfway through, but was graciously surprised when Tuk showed little sign of discomfort or distress. Simply enjoying the delicious food and scenery around her. "Tuktirey do not fear the waves as you swim." You held a steady grasp to Tuk's hand, providing some stability as she attempted to stay afloat comfortably as you did. "The harder you fight, the harder swimming will be."

Tuk let out a strong huff of frustration, "I only want to swim like you ____!" You laugh aloud at her inexperience, "most fyeyn in the clan can not swim half as well as me Tuktirey. Do not worry yourself so much." Tuk seemed to calm at the realization she was not lacking in skill, just you had an over abundance of it. "Woah, really!" You nodded, soon diving your head below the water in order to pick a ripe fruit from its underwater vine. "In truth Tuktirey, you are doing very well—even more so than your older siblings! Truly something only a strong warrior can accomplish.”

fyeyn - adult

She became silent at your words for a moment before speaking once more, "why do you call me that ____? I have never went into battle before like Neteyam and Lo'ak..." Tuk's head lowered slightly, a mix of sadness and anger playing on her features, all directed towards herself. You'd broken the fruit apart, placing its inside contents to her lips. "Being a warrior is not only about fighting. One can be a warrior of many things." Tuk took the fruit into her mouth, looking at you curiously. "Take me, I am a warrior of the water, and you—"

"You are a warrior of great courage. Not many are able to travel so far and stray from everything they've known, especially at your age."

"So...I am a warrior! More than Lo'ak, and Neteyam." Tuk's eyes gleamed with excitement, her arms moving to latch themselves around your neck. "____, if you know all this—can't you be nicer to everyone else?"

The question through you for a loop, but you came to understand why she'd ask this of you. Her family most likely spoke about you amongst themselves, no, you're positive they do, and she heard every word of it. Admittedly you did have your favorite out of the family, and to everyone else, the difference was noticeable. Though you still thought your actions of precaution were just, maybe at some points you took things too far. "I apologize Tuktirey, I've acted immaturely up until now."

"Pänutìng you won't be mean anymore!" Her bottom lip quivered ever so slight, in a silent plea. Wrapping an arm around your middle, you started swimming towards shore with ease despite the added weight. "I pänuting Tuktirey, kindness and respect shall be shown to your family by me from now on."

pänuting - promise

Eclipse over took the sky's bright and shining blues, now exchanging them for dark contrasting purples lined with thousands of stars. Both you and Tuk admired Eywa's enchanting sky view causing your voyage to take much longer than intended. Upon arrival, you notice the Sully's in their usual circle—minus one of course, deciding that your distance was close enough. "I'm afraid this is where we part ways young warrior."

"Come join us for dinner, they won't mind trust me!" Tuk began pulling you closer towards her home, you retracted yourself from her surprisingly vice grip on your arm. "No Tuktirey, I must leave for home myself soon—may eywa grant you peace."

"Goodnight ____." Tuk's pace turned into a fast jog as she approached her family's marui, "see you tomorrow!" You watched as she was immediately greeted by the others, showered with affection after she'd technically disappeared for nearly an entire day, cooing you watched the scene only a moment before the ocean called out your name in whisperers. Allowing herself to sucome to Eywa's waters.

Neteyam soon departed from his shared marui pod, eyes scanning around the dark in search of something—or rather—someone. Ah, he thinks, there you are. "Neteyam? What are you doing, sit. Dinner will be fixed soon." He paused at the entrance, with half his body already out, Neteyam turned to look at his mother pleadingly. "Uh, I'll be back soon, don't wait to eat."

Venturing out of his home at a rather quickened pace, Neteyam nearly tripped over himself to get to you, praying that the slip up went unnoticed.  "____" He called softly, possible the softest he ever would to anyone, so much he'd doubt you'd heard him.

Your ear twitched—you heard him— but the rest of your body remained unmoving. You'd submerge yourself barely waist length into the water, your arms outstretched to feel the bioluminescent squid which swam in circles around you as if you were born one of their own.

Neteyam ungracefully joined alongside by you in the ocean waves that pushed against his body, not only causing him to nearly lose his footing but also scare away your marine life.  "Oh! I truly meant no harm—" You interrupted his apology with a deep groan, silencing yourself by dragging two hands down your face, muffling the next words you spoke. "Eywa give me strength."

He'd really done it now, embarrassing himself not only once but twice in front of you of all na'vi. It's as if he lost all sense in your presence, who could recover from this? "Worry not, brother of Tuktirey, you are not completely to blame for your clumsiness. I am at fault too."

Neteyam lowered his own posture send you a look of surprise, you'd never said something like this to him. "Your sister has made me realize the error of my ways." Your gaze shifted to look towards Neteyam, leaving him breathless simply because of your stare. "I have been unreasonably cruel to you and your family."

Placing a light hand to his shoulder, you wanted Neteyam to understand the truth to your words—your truth. "I am sorry Neteyam."

A toothy grin grew on the younger na'vis face quicker than he could suppress it, an expression of true happiness taking shape. He'd never thought four simple words of an apology would ever make him feel the way he did now, like an opposing force finally released him, now Neteyam felt ten times lighter.

"Irayo ____." Encasing his hand around yours, Neteyam's words were followed by a deep, meaningful silence between the both of you. So much so, you barely took noticed of the lightened squid which not only surrounded yourself but also Neteyam into a circle. What you did take notice of were his round bunny ears, that twitched too often. And every tiny syuratan freckles scattered throughout his face. Your eyes began traveling further than they should've, taking note of his arms, though thin compared to your people, had a thick layer of toned muscle. Wondering the tiniest bit lower revealed a noticeable vline—

irayo - thank you

syuratan - bioluminescence

"I-I don't deserve your thanks," you withdrew your hand from his hold, opting to sway them in the waves. "Tomorrow I will truly teach you the ways of our people, just as I always should have." Neteyam stopped himself from reaching out to hold your limb once again, not wanting to risk losing the new found sympathy, watching while you fully submerged yourself, causing splashes of water to land on him. "Alright. Tomorrow then." He turned to walk back towards the dry surface sand.

"Nìhona unil, ____" Neteyam's smile outshined even thr thousands of stars above you, hoping he wouldn't see your growing nervousness. Simply nodding in response as he walked away.

nìhona - sweet

unil - dreams

You swam with your head atop the waves, enjoying the simple comfort and familiarity of something so known to you—paired with the overwhelming presence of the sky. Tears breamed along your waterline, mixing amidst salty water droplets that already occupied your cheeks. To do this, accepting them, went against the very values you'd built to protect yourself and the clan from your parent's fate. As if you broke some type of taboo by welcoming them with open arms despite knowing their origins.

"Great Mother," you say breathlessly, "guide me well."

[positivelybeastly]

X-Men #3

Again, late, but who cares? Let's do this.

Fuckin' Vanisher. For the second villain the X-Men ever faced, he really has never been anything more than just a mercenary twit.

That being said, I do appreciate his presence as a furthering of the general vibe of post-Krakoa Earth - mutants are on the run and scrabbling to find stability wherever they can find it, whether that be X-Men, X-Factor or, in Vanisher's case, O*N*E. Some are pickier than others, it would seem.

Ohhhhh my god, Hank. Hank. HANK.

Ahoy hoy? You Alexander Graham Bell Montgomery Burns loving bastard. I love it. Such a goober.

I do also appreciate that Hank's response here works because, even though we can assume that he knows vaguely who these people are - he's probably been reading the X-Men files to catch up on what he's missed, which, depending on when they were last updated, might mean he's reading his own observations on everyone else - he does not know how stubborn those four individuals are.

Half of them, Remy and Jubilee, he's never even met before, which is a wild concept, but true, nonetheless.

I do also like how easily Scott's fallen back into the habit of having Hank as his best friend. Like, I love Scott's friendships with a lot of the X-Men, they're all very unique dynamics, but I've made my case before that Hank was, at least up until 2009, Scott's very best friend, based on how much more free and able to talk about anything Scott was with him, and I feel like it's being born out here.

Even Illyana, who probably became closest to Scott after that point during the revolutionary era, never had the same emotionally intimate conversations that Hank and Scott could have during New or Astonishing X-Men. Among the O5, Scott's detachment and analytical side gelled with Hank's intelligence and social acumen in ways that Warren's easy going confidence and Bobby's immaturity simply couldn't.

Even back in the very original run, Hank is understanding of Scott's psychological make-up in ways that the others aren't, and you can really see that Scott allowed Hank to pull him along to being a little more open and free with his emotions, while being safe in the knowledge that Hank wouldn't try to force him out of his comfort zones. There was absolute, complete trust between them.

Was. And, seemingly, is again!

But yeah, you can really see it on display here. I don't know that Scott would be this willing to be this visibly frustrated and annoyed with Rogue's X-Men with, say, Kwannon or Max, but he can be with Hank, because Hank is gonna roll with him and work with him. I missed this dynamic.

God, this conversation fucks. I'm so glad that Idie is being given the space and the time and the freedom to be fucking furious with Magneto here, because she has every right to be. Her relationship with the X-Men and killing and death is so historically fraught, so full of judgement and learning and ideology, that I completely buy her frustration and fury and lack of patience for Max's hypocrisy.

When the teams for the From the Ashes books were being announced, I remember a lot of people analysing the team make-ups and thinking, ooh, I wonder if they'll touch on this, if they'll touch on that - all the canon deep cuts, all the conversations that should happen, the dynamics that should exist.

And because Jed MacKay is gonna Jed MacKay everywhere, all of those deep cuts and conversations and dynamics are present. It just. Pleases me, immensely. He's even intimated that Hank might have his time displaced memories, which would awesome to explore, since his time in the future with his older self has never really been brought up again, unlike Bobby and Scott. So much potential . . .

Lundqvist having to just sit there and take it is so good. I also appreciate the clarification of a bit of the world state that was going on in Fall of X, even if it is a . . . very disturbing and unfortunately realistic answer. Like, Christ, it doesn't surprise me to hear that the US just let Orchis do what they wanted, but it still just. Woof.

The demonstration of emotional control and the rattling off of the damage done to Scott in the wake of the Hellfire Gala is excellent foreshadowing, too.

I do love how fast and loose psychic connection allows you to be with team scenes in X-books. Literal info-dumps and fast-acting stratagem crafting on the fly - this is absolutely a team that Scott hand picked, because even without him around, they perform like, well.

Magic.

Also loving that Cain and Illyana continue to be bash siblings in the best way possible. Even if they don't get the same character focus that Hank, Scott and Idie have been getting thus far (still too early to say), if they come out of this with a fun dynamic, then I'll call this run a win for them both.

Beautiful.

I do love the continuing interconnectivity between the books - even though they're all separated geographically, people are aware of the changes in status quo, what everyone's doing, what their angles are, and it feels like a cohesive world. This was one of the better parts of Krakoa (and one of the more glaring flaws of X-Force/Wolverine), so I'm glad to see that the writers are clearly talking to each other a lot.

Also, ow, Scott, did you have to do Alex like that?

(I like unpopular X-Men, so, yeah, I have a soft spot for Alex Summers. Enough of a soft spot that I think that Scott is playing dismissive because it means that Alex isn't considered an easily exploited way to get at Scott, which keeps him safe. Scott has to play the lone wolf, no weaknesses, thinking five steps ahead leader man, and that means quite a lot of posturing. Hence the final line.)

Goes hard, tbh. I remember people being worried that Idie was going to get the short end of the stick, going into this series, just because she wasn't front and centre on a lot of the promotional material.

I don't think people have much to be worried about.

And then we come to the stinger, arguably the most interesting part of the issue - and the part that makes the most sense to me.

Now, I hate a certain contingent of Scott Summers fans. I hate the fans that act like he's some kind of alpha chad turbo mutant general boss man who gets all the hot telepaths and he's always right, because the amount of projection involved in that 'look at this introverted guy, he became a total badass that everyone respects' concept of Scott is off the charts, but also because it's just. Less interesting.

Scott Summers has fucking garbage mental health. Always has done. How could he not? His childhood was a literal nightmare. His surviving parent is a deadbeat asshole. He's lived from trauma to trauma since he was 15 years old. He was never taught proper coping techniques, never given the help he needed by Professor Xavier to help him live a life outside of the X-Men - which is why he's always come back to them. Which is why he's always there.

Because he has nowhere else to be. If he isn't an X-Man, he's nothing.

And now? Now, it's gotten to be bad enough that he's having panic/anxiety attacks. Because of course it has! His eyes got sewn shut! His wife got murdered! He's been through it!

This is one of those stingers that catches you off guard for a second, and then anyone with a brain goes, oh yeah, nah, that actually makes total and complete sense, of course Scott Summers would have panic attacks, the guy has some of the most insecure psychology you'll see outside of a Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders!

Absolutely fascinated to see where this goes, honestly. It's not often you get to see a 60 year old comic book character in a new light, and the idea that MacKay is really going to dive into Scott's trauma, into who he is now and who he's always been, into the man that people have made him, is just fascinating.

Issue #2 was good, but it did feel very much like filler. This, though. This is way more in line with issue #1, and it has me genuinely excited to see what comes next.

Just, uh. If we could get more than three panels of Hank, two of which have him unconscious on the floor, that'd be great, thank you. I need new icons, ya dig?

[jessicanjpa]

normal

A snippet from this chapter of 1935, in which Rosalie is getting to know a fellow engineering major. This is her first time going to college. Edward POV.

"Edward, for once, could you just leave me alone?"

Rosalie twisted her arm, breaking my grasp. Is it so bad that I want to have lunch with one of my classmates? You know I won't let it go anywhere.

"This is a bad idea," I growled as George walked up to us the second he entered the dining hall. He was frowning at me.

"Is there a problem?" he asked, lowering his voice. Oh, come on.

"No, my brother was just leaving," Rosalie said through her teeth. Get lost.

George relaxed visibly. I turned to him and crossed my arms, giving him a silent, menacing stare.

Good thing he's her brother… wouldn't want to have THAT for competition. "Well, let's go," he said to Rosalie, brushing past me. I followed them in and stood right behind them in the line, much to Rosalie's annoyance. George handed her a tray and gestured for her to step in front of him. The three of us passed through the line silently, loading our trays with the awful-smelling food. I wondered if it smelled any better to George; it seemed a little nicer than the fare at the high school, but I wasn't really the best judge of that.

As soon as George had paid for their food, Rosalie quickly walked over to a tiny table with two chairs. If you're going to be annoying, at least be annoying across the room. I frowned at her and went to sit alone at a similar table about fifty feet away.

Rosalie picked up her fork and started poking at her food, chattering away with George about the quiz. It was obvious he had found it difficult, but he was trying to hide that fact from Rosalie.

"He only got seventy percent of them right," I muttered, knowing she could hear me.

Rosalie ignored me; if anything, my interference seemed to be egging her on. She combed a delicate hand through her hair, smiling to herself when George's heart rate sped up. She folded her hands under her chin and leaned forward. "Oh, well, enough about engineering. Tell me about yourself, George. Where are you from?"

My fork clattered on the table in frustration. This was getting ridiculous.

George gladly talked about himself for most of the lunch hour, occasionally asking Rosalie questions about her own life, which she answered smoothly. She took special pleasure in pointing out that I was actually a year older than her, but had been held back while I was in foster care. "It's not that Edward isn't intelligent," she said cheerfully. "It's just that he was a little immature back then. He cried all the time."

George snuck an anxious glance over at me. "He's not your real brother?"

"Well, he is now. Carlisle and Esme adopted both of us eventually. My father was a brain surgeon up in Pennsylvania. He and Dr. Cullen were close friends. So when my parents died in the accident, Dr. and Mrs. Cullen adopted me."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I had no idea. Do you miss your parents?" George asked. And why isn't she eating anything? Maybe she's nervous, too.

She shrugged. "Not really. I was only three when it happened. But tell me more about your family."

I stood up abruptly, carrying my still-full tray past them on my way to the trashcan. I purposely bumped into Rosalie on my way. "Stop messing around," I growled under my breath.

"I take it back," Rosalie said loudly to George. "He's still immature." George smirked up at me, encouraged by our banter.

"It's too bad you have plans tonight," he said wistfully.

"Well, I suppose I could reschedule them. It was only a family thing, anyway. Maybe we could—"

My glass shattered in my hand, drawing the attention of everyone in the room. I quickly stuck my finger in my mouth, wincing at my "cut." After a moment, the conversations around us resumed, and I headed back to Rosalie's table, pushing my way through the crowd.

George was leaning forward conspiratorially, speaking quickly before I could reach the table. "Really? That's great! Could I pick you up at six?"

Rosalie hesitated just briefly. "That sounds lovely." She reached over and scribbled our address on George's napkin.

I finally reached them. "Let's go," I said sternly. "We don't want to be late for English." I picked up Rosalie's tray, quickly sweeping up George's napkin onto it when he wasn't looking.

See you tonight, Rosalie mouthed to him as I pulled her anxiously away. The human just grinned, reaching down for his napkin. He frowned when he realized it was gone.

My smug smile disappeared when I heard his next thought; he didn't need the napkin. He had already memorized our address.

.

.

.

We got to English with two minutes to spare. As soon as we sat down, I turned to my sister angrily. "That was idiotic, you know, even for you. He could tell you weren't eating. And I can't believe you gave him our address!"

"What was I supposed to do?" she hissed back. "Tell him I'd run over to his house?"

"You're not going anywhere! You are going to cancel the whole thing when you see him later."

"No, I'm not. And besides, I don't have any more classes with him today. And it's not like we really had plans tonight."

"Rosalie, if you don't cancel it, I'm going to tell Carlisle."

Now she was getting angry. "Go ahead! He'll probably tell you to mind your own business."

I snorted. "I doubt that."

She leaned in closer, talking at vampire speed; the professor was entering the room. "Just because you don't want any friends, doesn't mean that I don't. I just want someone to talk to."

"Why can't you talk to a girl?"

"You know there aren't any other girls in my major. I'll just go on this one date, and that'll be it. And you had better not follow me."

"I'm not following you, because you're not going," I whispered back. The professor began his lecture and we turned our eyes to the front of the room. Rosalie focused intently on the lesson, but she shot me one last thought before blocking me out.

I just want to be normal, Edward. Can't you understand that?

[gerardpilled]

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[mimisfortress]

Guess who lost her diary key and is now turning to Tumblr to blog my feelings (me) 🦄🌈

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💞💌Really long VENT post coming your way ❤️‍🩹🪽

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Currently going through an emotional rut.

I feel pretty unsure of myself. I lost a couple of friends and I am having a hard time knowing whether it was my fault or if they had it coming.

These weren't just normal friends, they were family at that point. We witnessed unspeakable things together at a fairly young age and I really, really, really thought that our friendship was forever. I thought our friendship was different from everyone else's in a sense that growing older wouldn't impact us the way adults warned us it would. I thought trauma made us special and I thought change wouldn't find us.

To these friends, I was their baby sister and they treated me as such, too. They dogged on who I loved and did not trust me to make my own choices. They grilled someone who I had genuine love for after not batting an eye at the unhappy abusive relationship I was in for three years.

As I grew older, I grew distant because I was too scared to express that the way they treated me upset me. I figured that since they already have so much to worry about in their lives, my fragile feelings would burden them.

I am aware of the importance of communication, but I simply just felt like I couldn't communicate my feelings to them in any way.

During the past month, our friendship of 9 years came to an end. It crashed and burned when I couldn't make it to a big hang out that costed a lot of money. It was only supposed to be my friend and I, just us two. Luckily, this former friend of mine got a refund and another friend was able to take my place.

I don't know why they wanted me so bad. They had a lot to say about how bad of a friend I was and not much good to say about me, and yet they wanted me so bad. I didn't feel appreciated as a person and they didn't celebrate me as a friend. Yet, if they told me they needed me I'd come in and do what I could to the best of my ability even after they told me they hated me or told me my desperate attempts to help after they begged for my help was "inappropriate". I still stayed because if I'm the one in the wrong, I can also make it into a right if I really tried.

I hate to say it, but I feel anger when I think about these friends of mine. What I hate even more is that I keep wanting to go back. I keep wanting to say "yes! You're right, I am a terrible and awful person and I will change myself just for you guys!" just to hear their laughter again, see their funny smiles, and . . . inevitably get sent large paragraphs of text telling me I did something wrong again. And then the cycle repeats where I think that I'm wrong and they're right because I'm the little sister who's immature and doesn't know anything and they're the older, wiser sisters who parent me.

I was really sure that I was the failure. I was the one that failed to hold it together. I mean, come on! I didn't communicate my feelings, I told a big lie to them, and I grew distant without explanation.

But then I had invited a friend of mine into my home who has hurt more times than anyone I've ever known. We didn't have to experience a terribly traumatic event together at a young age to be best friends, she just loved me. She loved me and she told me why.

She liked that I didn't yell or curse when she had moments of frustration and impatience, she appreciated my high level of patience, and she tells me that she thinks I have emotional intelligence.

My other friends never told me anything like that. They think I suck at supporting them, they don't think I can be trusted to make good decisions, that I'm an inconvenience and blah, blah, blah, blah.

At my house, my friend looked over the texts shared between me and these other friends. Maybe it's pushing their privacy, but I felt like it was detrimental for my mental health for eyes other than mine to view these text messages and tell me if I'm allowed to be upset or not.

This friend of mine looked at these text messages with complete and utter disgust. I watched her make faces viewing the messages. She visibly cringed upon reading them and it shocked me. I thought she was going to be able to find something I said, point at it, and tell me "here's what I think made her mad. I can help you write an apology if you want!"

But no, reading the exchange of text messages angered her so much that she couldn't bare to read the rest, which disappointed me. What if she's missing the part where I say something I need to apologize for?

What she told me was this :

• You need to stop letting them walk all over you, you need to write a long message to them but not out of empathy or kindness, but to give yourself closure. You need to do more for yourself. I just don't want you to sit here and let them bully you.

• They are simply just choosing to believe that you are a bad friend. You don't talk bad about them to me at all, and yet they claim that's all you've been doing.

• Why is it okay for them to discuss what they don't like about you behind your back and not you?

And stuff like that. We never ended up sending a long text for me to express my emotions because knowing these friends, they'd blow up on me even more and tell me how a lot of it is actually my fault.

It's been a hard 3 months. I'm worried about becoming exactly what these friends of mine chose to believe I was; an unempathetic, emotionally unintelligent, mentally-unstable, coldhearted, and immature creature.

This is because often times things are believed into existence. Therefore, I'm going to work on kindness without the expectation of something in return, generosity, mental clarity, and patience to prevent their beliefs from becoming reality. I'm not going to give anyone a reason to treat me like they did ever again.

This situation has impacted my mental health pretty negatively, and so I'll be posting updates on my mental health!

[nevergonnabemuchmorethanweather]

What's your favorite and least favorite thing about each main character on BTVS and Angel?

I can really only answer this for BTVS. I have seen Angel, but not recently, and it just doesn't resonate with me the way BTVS does. Turns out, when there's no Buffy, I don't care.

Buffy:

I love so much about Buffy Summers that it's hard to pick a true favorite trait. I'm going to go with her intelligence because it's so often overlooked even though, in many ways, she's the smartest character on the show-- and the one who actually uses her brain when everyone around her is being utterly irrational and falling for every trick in the manipulative villain handbook.

My least favorite thing about her, by far, is what a doormat she can be sometimes. It's so frustrating watching her take so much shit from her friends and family and forget her own strength over and over.

Giles:

This is difficult to articulate, but I like that Giles chooses to be one of the good guys despite clearly having the capacity not to be, and how his own moral grayness gives him an understanding of the nuances of human nature that the others lack.

My least favorite thing about Giles is his emotional cowardice and immaturity. He does so many harmful and downright stupid things trying to run from his feelings. He never quite learns to put on his big boy pants and deal with his issues, and his being decades older than the rest of the cast makes it really glaring.

Willow:

I love it when Willow cuts down to the core of a situation and exposes everybody's bullshit. Her rant to Giles and Angel in Reptile Boy, reading Faith for filth in Choices, and shutting Parker down in Beer Bad are some of my favorite moments with her.

My least favorite thing about her is that she's actually incredibly self-centered and entitled a lot of the time. She expects the world to stop for her when she's in pain and when she thinks she's right, she's not interested in what anyone else has to say or silly things like basic human rights and autonomy.

Xander:

His bravery. Despite having no powers and no particular skill set, he ends up accomplishing some pretty impressive things through sheer balls and determination, and it's hard not to respect that. Trust me, I've tried.

My least favorite thing about him is almost everything else about him, but I guess that's kind of cheating. If I had to sum it up into one trait, I think I'd say it's his blatant hypocrisy that bothers me the absolute most. He doesn't even try to live up to the standards he sets for other people.

From here on out, my take on who is and who isn't a main character is going to be pretty arbitrary. For instance, I'm not including Tara, even though I adore her, because I couldn't think of anything bad to say about her and that probably means she wasn't fleshed out enough to be a true main character. If I skip a character you wanted my opinion on, I'm always open to more Buffy asks!

Dawn:

Her loyalty. My girl does not mess around when you mess with the people she cares about, and she doesn't play that 'don't take sides' crap. If you hurt someone she loves, you're going to hear about it. I know, I know, Empty Places, but she was clearly being manipulated there and if you look at her behavior overall, she's absolutely a ride or die and I love it.

Her expectations, especially of Buffy, are extremely unreasonable sometimes and it causes a lot of misery all around. I don't count it against her too much because it's a pretty normal teenager thing, but if there was one thing I could change about her, it would probably be that.

Angel:

His insight. He's very good at channeling his own emotional turmoil and self-loathing into understanding others-- usually Buffy, but not always.

His martyr complex and constant self-sabotage are super annoying. Though I love him, I do totally understand people who can't deal with his Man Pain.

Spike:

Devotion. I have all sorts of problems with him but he does have a capacity for sacrificial love that transcends all else-- including soullessness and demonic influence.

And my least favorite thing about him is really just the flip side of that same trait. He's simultaneously creepily obsessive and eye-rollingly sentimental and dramatic.

Thanks for the ask!

[overlyimmersed]

god frickin damn it...

so I hate getting involved in internet discourse, I try not to do that ranting thing, I don't like the feeling of conflict. you lot frickin scare me...

but...

Today I read- for the second time mind you, I let it go the first time- this post about the age gaps in 7DS. It was written in respond to the "Jericho situation" but called out several instances where characters were weird in this way, such as that time right after Danafall where Meliodas called a literal baby Elizabeth "my woman"...

But this isn't about Meliodas, it's not even about Jericho, cuz hunny I'm not touchin that one...Not yet anyway, I haven't reached a point where I'm frustrated enough to go into that (but I am close thanks to another stupid post I read)

No, this is about King and Diane. Note that I call King by his real name almost exclusively, so from here he'll be referred to as Harlequin. For the sake of everyone who doesn't give a damn, and I truly don't blame you, I'll put a read more cuz I don't know how long this is gonna get...

This poster seemed to feel like the 500 years Harlequin and Diane spent together after the "Helbram incident" while Harlequin had amnesia counts as "him raising her". Excuse me...that's not how either of those races work...

I'll be generally disregarding the actual numbers here, because not only do the numbers tell us very little about the stages of maturity for these races, but Fairies and Giants also mature at different rates in relation to each other, so the math wouldn't really prove anything.

For one thing, Diane isn't a toddler here. At this point, despite her general naive nature, she's probably more like the equivalent of an 11 or 12 year old. Diane has a naive personality as a fully grown adult. It's just her personality. The fact that Harlequin knows more about the world then her, does not automatically parentify him...

Harlequin on the other hand, yes is older than Diane. But not by very much from a maturity standpoint. Fairies are basically kids till they get their wings. Like that's how their physiology works. Harlequin is, not just emotionally but also physically, immature for almost the entire series. That's why he behaves like that. During the series, which is 500 years after the incident in question remember, Harlequin is basically a teenager. Which is why he acts like one.

During his time with Diane he's equal to probably a 14 year old. Still a little squiggy age gap wise, when you think of it in those terms. A 14 year old and a 12 year old seems a little off by modern-day human standards. But for what they are, an immature Fairy and an immature Giant, they've always been in similar places as far as mental/emotional maturity goes.

bottom line?

He didn't raise her, they grew up together.

[mild-lunacy]

I always thought of myself as someone who's a big fan of 'unlikeable' or difficult characters in fiction, from the most psychologically complex to your basic 'bad boy' types (if written well enough). So it's difficult for me to reconcile this with the fact that I gave up on Mira Honfleur's Blade and Rose series at least partly because of the 'bad boy' problem. It seems I make an exception for... entitled internet asshole types, I guess?

If you've read the book(s) more than a quarter of the way, feel free to enlighten me or let me know it improves. At this point, it seems like my issue is that a) there's a love triangle (which I default to hating in any romance where it's a source of drama) and b) the 'bad boy' is just really entitled and... weak because he's insecure, I guess? Like the sort of guy that blames the woman for his own insecurity, while being responsible for meeting his needs and solving his issues.

I mean, insecurity can be sympathetic, but when a person blames someone else for not solving their problems.... You can argue it's realistic, but I think it's *too* realistic. Or rather, it's so frustrating and annoying that it starts to make me annoyed not at the guy, but at the supposedly 'strong' female character who would tolerate this bullshit, even if it's in the past by the time the couple's temporary reconciliation eventually occurs (according to spoilers).

I think I'm used to 'bad boys' just being extra ruthless, possibly violent, empathically challenged, overly ambitious but not... personally odious, I guess? Like in a gross way. Like... a loser way. Not being a sad loser is kind of a prerequisite to being a 'bad boy' love interest and not... a YA villain, basically.

I find myself making comparisons to incels and like, Tate fanboys, though this is just vibes mainly. Basically, this guy wants the main character to shut up and marry him because he needs his curse lifted ASAP, and it's inconvenient and embarrassing for him to have to wait while she gets the magical education she needs to be safe. Therefore he's going to seduce and scheme, and if that fails, try to ruin her life. That's not really the sort of thing I can find cute or forgivable on any level. Perhaps that's unsurprising after all.

Anyway, this is why I never truly liked Snape in HP . Not really. I mean, I loved Draco and he was bitter and envious and insecure... so why was that attractive, then? Well, it's because there was a power imbalance in Harry's favor between them. Unlike Snape, who abused his power over Harry, Draco just kinda... tried and failed a lot. His insecurities and immaturity were also more justifiable in my mind 'cause he's a kid and then a young teen, who was scheming against a favored school peer, even if Harry's an orphan and Draco had higher social status. By contrast, this 'bad boy' currently has higher social status than the main character that he schemes against (who's also an orphan), and he's in his mid-twenties. Definitely time to know better.

I'll admit though, partly it's that I'm okay with Harry and Draco 'cause a) they were both boys and b) the narrative doesn't make Draco a major character, let alone a love interest. He's a rival. Rivals in YA books get to scheme and be little jerks in pathetic, even disgusting ways. If a love interest and ongoing major POV character (even if he's not endgame) is a 'pathetic little cockroach' , you've got a problem in an adult romance storyline.

To be honest, this is why I used to almost exclusively read slash or m/m fiction. Would this whole gross dynamic be okay with me if everyone was male? Well... probably? It wouldn't be great 'cause I still hate love triangles, but there's still an irrefutable power dynamic issue when an older male character in a position of social and romantic authority tries to abuse his power at the expense of a young woman. It doesn't matter if she's strong, and doesn't buy what he's selling and is even able to defeat his earlier schemes. Any ethical retreat or future accommodation made might be considered big-hearted and generous from a male main character... but seems like validation of the male abuser when a woman is involved.

Even then, there's a special wrongness in a man who attempted to rob the main character of an education. Maybe that's just me, but I'm much more likely to get over an attempt on their life, money or liberty (those are pretty commonplace, really). People's personal issues, needs and insecurities don't really matter that much when they're used as an *excuse* for truly antisocial behavior. And even though the main character never *actually* excuses this behavior as an adult, and the text explicitly doesn't justify it in any way, just merely being a POV love interest is enough to create a dynamic where readers will be likely to hand-wave these things or become increasingly frustrated. Like, there's being empathetic and then there's being a sucker. 💁

[troutfur]

Reading a couple of chapters of Moonrise just before I have to go out and do stuff and it just immediately hits me how this passage:

Stormfur felt a stab of jealousy at the sight of the two ThunderClan cats close together, and tried to push it away. He had no right to admire Squirrelpaw, and her courage and bright optimism, as much as he did, when they came from different Clans. Brambleclaw would make her a much better mate.

not only has me groaning because it's like "Oh great, here we go pushing the romantic subplot way too early", but also how it comes across so incredibly badly considering Squirrelpaw is, at most, 10 moons old. More realistically about 9 going by time references in the books themselves.

You can make the argument based on the extra time Firestar's Quest adds to the timeline that everyone is about a year older than their stated ages IIRC. But that's rather dishonest and definitely not consistent with the text.

I really wouldn't have minded if Squirrel and Leaf were aged up a little to be about young warrior aged much like Crowpaw. Particularly because I feel like frustrated older apprentice who's being denied her assessment and warrior name due to immaturity and disobedience fits the kind of character she is at this time. And it'd help her fit better in the group dynamic rather than making her feel like the obligatory tag-along kid.

(Though at that point the writers may have wanted to consider whether she and Crowpaw are redundant characters and merge them. Which to be honest, canon in itself already makes the argument for. What was the point of doubling up on the apprentice characters in the journey?)

We would loose a little in the Mothpool department. "Young teen Lesbian crushing on a young adult who from her perspective seems to be so much more mature but under the surface is very much not as well put together as she seems" is a great dynamic they have going on towards the beginning. But I think the sacrifice would be worth it.

[castingspellsanddaisies]

Haha sorry, I meant to write fangirls but somehow my keyboard corrected it for…Daniel’s?

I completely respect your opinion that maturity comes with age, but I just wanted to mention the possibility, cause it was the case for me!

Since I got into tarot, readers had been telling me that my soulmate is someone with more youthful energy than me and it always made me kind of frustrated because I was into older guys and I was still in my late teens so what would I do with a younger guy?… but now that I’ve been with him, he’s indeed more childlike than me while I’m way more mature than him(Scorpio rising and Pluto in first house haha!) meanwhile he’s physically three years older than me! (By the way we met when I was 22 and he was 25, but our dynamic has always been the same!)

Some people just mature really early and some stay childlike and that’s ok!

*And also it’s more likely that Jude’s future wife is older physically too, I just wanted to mention the possibility based on my own life!*

WOW! Congratulations for you and your partner! Amazing, truly.

But, yes, there's nothing wrong with being childlike, and it's not a sign of someone being immature. Yes, we adults tend to become a little more distrustful as we grow old, but how can we not? We see how shit the world is. Children and younger ones tend to act more lighthearted because they're still and awe.

*Yeah... She's older and more mature haha*

Thank you! Have a nice day!

[jodilin65]

I’m truly frustrated as fuck. I’m so tired of the way I have suffered nearly every single fucking day for a decade from some kind of shit or another. If I’m not anxious, I’m tired or there’s something else. But my hands are tied. Because of Tom, I can’t end my misery. I still care more about what he wants more than what I want, but oh, how I wish I would get something that would kill me! I know that won’t happen, though. I trust my intuition too much not to believe I don’t have many years ahead. They will be tough but they’re there until I just can’t take it anymore.

The same thing happened last time around only this time I woke myself up snoring at 5.5 hours into my sleep rather than 3.5. Also like the last time, it took me an hour or so to get back to sleep.

Again I find it hard to believe this is all one big coincidence and that nothing’s been cursing my sleep in one form or another all my life. It’s like with the dream premonitions. After you have a few you think it’s a neat coincidence. But when a few become dozens you know it’s not.

We looked at snoring backpack pillows where you wear this vest-like thing with a cushion in the middle of your back to keep you off your back. It seemed a bit bulky and uncomfortable. When Tom did additional research, he found someone who said to just tape a tennis ball to your back. Well, I was thinking I may start with one of those small plastic containers I store my diamonds in for diamond painting. This way it wouldn’t be anything bulky and annoying but I would definitely notice it if I shifted on to my back.

This doesn’t mean I still wouldn’t wake up to pee or for no apparent reason and struggle to fall back asleep. Having my sleep broken up is such a killer on me. The older I get, the harder it is on my body. My biggest concern right now is how hard it’s going to be to get to my appointment on the 13th. I’m going either way because it’s a very important appointment but I just wonder how exhausted I’m going to be that day. At least it’s close!

I’m just starting to feel traces of burning again down there too, which tells me dryness wasn’t my only issue as I suspected. It’s probably connected to whatever was raising the WBC count in my pee.

Different subject. A sick twisted bitch I call Termite Tammy.

This poorly written 2009 message from my dear sister said, “you should of jumped from a higher window and saved your family all this hurt and grief.”

And this is someone I forgave and let back into my life for nearly a decade?! Shame on me!!! Really, WTF was I thinking???

My eyes are now wide open to my past stupidity but I’m ashamed and even embarrassed to know how long it took me to finally stop giving toxic people not only second chances but third chances and sometimes even more. I guess sometimes we just want to believe that people really are aware of their mistakes and are determined to change. But they’re not aware of them and even if they are, they don’t think they’ve done anything wrong and they’re not about to change for anyone or anything.

When I first started editing the part for my blog where she and her brood pulled their twisted shit on me in the summer of 2009, I kind of laughed and shook my head at just how childish and utterly insane they were and will no doubt always be when reading back on some of the nasty shit they sent me that I copied into journals. I mean it was just fucking ridiculous. Forget just immature, it was completely asinine and dumber than dumb. These people can’t even write much less make sense or know what the hell they were even talking about. On top of the stupidity was the sheer evilness and vindictiveness.

But when I got to that part about jumping, the giggles turn to anger and this time more at myself than at the termite because I should have known better than to let someone like that back into my life when I knew damn well what she was capable of in the past. She caused me so much trouble throughout my life but there I was, oh so nice and oh so forgiving, always wanting to try again as if a miracle could happen and they’d be anyone but who they always were.

Despite the cruelness of her words, I’m also glad I read that because it was the final clincher in getting myself not to care about those who don’t care about me which I’ve been working on for a while now. So no, I don’t want to hear from Nane because I’m finally smart enough to know better and to know that we would only get into another argument in the future and one of us would dump the other. And no, I don’t want to hear from Maliheh either or anyone else I’ve ever had problems with online or in person. From this day forward, one strike and you’re out! I don’t care how much history we may have. I don’t care how apologetic you may be and how much you swear never to repeat your mistakes.

[mybeardsblog]

´º´•»⋆° 𝒯𝒽𝑒 𝑅𝑒𝒶𝒹𝑒𝓇 °⋆´º´•»

📕 𝐵𝓎:𝐵𝑒𝓇𝓃𝒶𝓇𝒹 𝒮𝒸𝒽𝓁𝒾𝓃𝓀 📕

(Critique #1)

The Characters:

Michael Berg - The story’s protagonist and narrator, who as a fifteen-year-old boy has an affair with an older woman named Hanna, only to discover years later that his lover was once a Nazi prison guard.

Hanna Schmitz (Frau Shmitz) - Michael’s lover and the story’s antagonist. Often described by Michael as “tired,” Hanna’s emotions, motivations, and personalities can be seen only through the eyes of Michael, who is often conflicted about her.

Michael’s Father - A philosophy professor who is distant from his wife and children. Though he doesn’t appear often in the story, Michael’s father and their relationship are mentioned more often than his other family members.

The Jewish Woman / The Daughter - The daughter (nameless in the book) who had survived, with her mother, in the church fire in which Hanna was complicit.

The Prison Warden - The warden of Hanna’s prison seems to care sincerely for the welfare of Hanna and the other prisoners.

The Driver - The driver who allows Michael to hitchhike with him to Struthof, a nearby concentration camp.

The Judge - The judge who presides over Hanna’s trial. Michael observes the judge’s near constant expression of annoyance, especially at Hanna’s contradictions to certain claims about her.

Gertrud - Michael’s wife, and later ex-wife. A law clerk and later a judge, Gertrud is described by Michael as “smart, efficient, and loyal.”

Michael’s mother - Michael’s mother seldom appears in the story, and as Michael’s girlfriend Gesina notes, he rarely mentions her when discussing his past.

Michael’s older brother- Like Michael’s other siblings, his brother also appears only rarely in the novel.

Summary/Moral Lesson

So far, I have grown to appreciate this book, not only because I have a love for coming of age literature but also because it has really grown on me. When I first started reading the first 6 chapters on the bus to states, I was in an environment of frustration which lead me to initially dislike the book. However, as I began to absorb the novel, I became aware of the themes that it was suggesting of immature love, the relationship between romantic and sexual intimacy and the lack of romantic maturity within the mind of a teenage boy.Getting started with the book was super difficult and I really could not bring myself to get into it. I guess I was just feeling lazy since we’re back at school or something because the first ten pages took me an hour to get through but then I literally flew through the rest of the twenty pages in about twelve minutes; this is a definite plus side to the book because it goes by super quickly while you are reading. I like how the narrator starts the book off by saying that he was young when he got sick. This makes the reader think that the whole book will be about growing up really sick and how he dealt with that. However in reality, it seems like Michael just stated that he was sick to explain the events that led up to the narrator meeting the woman. I find their relationship, if you can even call it one at this point, extremely weird. Hanna found Michael when he was very sick and helped him, then he went to her house to thank her, she caught him watching her change so he ran away, he couldn’t stop thinking about her for a week so he returned to her house, then thirty-year-old Hanna invites fifteen-year-old Michael in to her house take a bath and ends up having sex with him, and the narrator falls in love with her, of course. Once he’s had sex with Hanna, Michael feels like he has transformed from a child to a man and feels very distant from his family. All of a sudden, he is strong enough to go back to school because he wants to show off his new found confidence. He immediately misses Hanna and realizes that he only wants to be with her, all of the time. Michael feels very attached to her, but it seems like Hanna is only playing with his emotions. Ilike how Bernhard Schlink’s diction is so simple but he includes so many details in such a small space. This is such a nice change from Paris Architect because everything in that book was sooooo drawn out and repetitive, whereas The Reader is very concise and to the point.

[cigvrettedvet]

mina & atlas.

      ❝ if that’s the case, i’ll go ahead and continue what i’ve been thinking all along then. it’s not like you’ll ever care enough to ask what i think anyways. ❞ more of a bluff than anything, since atlas was never kept awake late at night thinking of her anyways. had she not pressed his buttons so hard, he wouldn’t think very negatively of her at all. she purposely crawled under his skin to get reactions out of him; how else was he supposed to feel about her? she certainly hadn’t given him good reason to think very positively either. ❝ right, yup. that’s me - creepy, ❞ he murmured, letting the weak insult roll off of his shoulders as if it was nothing. ❝ i’m not sure why you’re harping on the idea of charm when it’d never been my intention to woo any women going to those parties. ❞ wasn’t to say that he’d never been interested ever, and the same for the girls who had been interested in him in the past. but parties? to pick up girls? certainly wasn’t his MO. his eyes and expression remain deadpan as he plopped a cut of veal into his mouth, slowly chewing in thought and not hinting or giving any semblance of an answer until he was quite finished with his bite. ❝ if you really think my conversation skills are lacking, why is that you’re always around to pester me? surely it’s not like you to just sit around and enjoy my company so what is it? why haven’t you run off with anyone else? why ME? ❞ 

             “why should i? i’m just doing the exact same thing you do to me. we don’t care about each other, it’s simple.” safe is probably the better word. mina liked knowing who she was dealing with and she knew exactly what she was getting with atlas every time. “at least you admit it,” mina teases with an annoyingly smug smile. the woman’s willing to take whatever victory she can get - big or small. “of course, it was to people watch. how could i forget?” she’s on a roll for tonight, even if atlas doesn’t betray much emotion at all. mina gets hints of annoyance here and there but it’s frustrating just how much atlas doesn’t care. atlas being the older sibling makes so much sense, probably used to the teasing and the insults by now. and it’s not long atlas finds a way to strike back in a way where mina can’t think of a quick comeback for him. mina pauses at his question, wanting to choose carefully. mina doesn’t even really know the answer but her best bet is a safe one. no matter how immature it might make her look. “it’s not such a big deal. i just like to annoy you. everyone else is so boring and you’re the only one who hasn’t managed to crack yet,” mina shrugged, “you’re nothing more than a challenge to me. one i’m determined to win.” there was nothing else to it so mina wasn’t sure why she couldn’t look atlas in the eye suddenly. “i can ask you the same question. why do you continue to talk to me if i’m such an annoying brat to you? why bother to help me tonight besides human decency?”

[helloalycia]

body swap [one] // wanda maximoff

summary: when Kate tries to cheer you up after you're continuously moping around following your breakup with Wanda, she ends up messing around with one of Doctor Strange's spells and leaves you both in an unexpected predicament.

warning/s: mentions of a breakup, body swapping i guess??

author's note: okay this came to me when i was watching 17 Again and then i realised it’s a little Freaky Friday related too so yeah, there you go, hope you enjoy!

also i’m estimating wanda to be 29 and reader to be 25, just for context. okay, now enjoy!

two / three / four / masterlist / wattpad

Wanda crossed her arms, fingers clutching her arms tightly and with frustration. I watched her with a scowl, hating the anger that was burning in my chest the longer I waited for her to speak.

"Did you ever think that I act the way I do because you don't listen?" I said when she wouldn't fill the silence. "You stopped listening a while ago, Wanda. How do you expect me to take things seriously when you don't give me the time of day?"

She rolled her eyes and scoffed. "We're Avengers, Y/N, we have busy lives. This isn't my fault. And our jobs are not an excuse for you to act the way you do."

I raised my eyebrows with offence. "The way I do? And what way is that, Miss Maximoff?"

She glared at me. "Like a child! You can't take anything seriously! Every time I try to have a serious conversation with you, you think it's funny."

"Again, it would be easier to take you seriously if you gave me a minute of your day without making it about yourself," I snarled with a frown.

She clenched her fists in her crossed arms. "You're such a baby, Y/N."

"Then why are you putting up with me?!" I shouted with frustration. "You clearly don't have the patience for me!"

"This is what I get for dating a child," she said with irritation. "Four years is quite the difference after all, isn't it?"

I groaned exaggeratedly. If I'd had a penny for every time she brought our age difference into an argument, I'd be richer than Tony.

"And the biggest drama queen award goes to...," she muttered with an eye roll.

It wasn't working anymore. We both knew it. The arguments had been more frequent for a few months now. We weren't communicating. I felt like she was always neglecting me for work, never putting me first like I wanted, and she clearly thought I was too immature for her. Maybe we'd finally ran our course after all this time.

"Maybe we have," she said with a glassy stare directed my way, and I realised she'd read my mind.

I swallowed the growing lump in my throat. "So, now what?"

Her jaw was clenched tightly, a fury in her gaze that hadn't disappeared this whole argument. "I think you know."

I squeezed my fists tightly, trying to stop my eyes from tearing up, but it was no use. This was it. The end.

"Fine," I gave in, too tired to fight anymore. "I guess this is it."

A small part of me hoped she would tell me to stop, tell me that we could somehow make this work, but I knew it wasn't the truth. And she knew it, too.

"Goodbye, Y/N," she mumbled, blinking a tear from her eye.

I looked down at the ground when she walked right past me and out of my bedroom. It was funny how three years could end just like that.

————————

"Come on, it's so cool!" Kate was saying excitedly, barely able to keep still as she dragged me through hallway after hallway in the compound.

I let her take me wherever, not in the mood to put up a fight and also not really caring what had her so excited. Probably something that would get us in trouble, which was usually what followed after she found something new and showed me.

Despite Kate being twenty-two and myself a few years older, we got on really well and it was nice to have a friend in her. Maybe that was another thing Wanda considered a reason to break our relationship off for – maybe she considered it another way in which I was immature, unable to make friends my own age. Whatever. Who cared what she thought?

"Isn't it cool?!" Kate exclaimed with a grin when we reached a room I'd never been in before. "It's Strange's office!"

I probably should have told her that we shouldn't be here, and that she definitely shouldn't be snooping around his things because he had literal magic and we might do something stupid, but I couldn't find the energy to care.

"It'll cheer you up, c'mon," Kate was insistent, pulling me into the office.

"I doubt it..."

Since the breakup, I hadn't been myself, not wholly. It happened a month ago and was still pretty fresh, the words of our argument still ringing in my head, the heartbreak still crumbling in my chest. Wanda hadn't spoken to me since, not unless it was work-related, and so I hadn't spoken to her either. But it didn't make me feel any better. She probably didn't even care, so I tried to tell myself I didn't either. Key word being tried.

Kate was rambling about a bunch of cool magic-y stuff she'd found, shoving random objects and valuables in my face like a toddler let loose in a sweet shop, but I wasn't paying much attention. As always, my thoughts were preoccupied by a certain redhead.

"...so just hold this a sec," Kate was saying, before thrusting a glass of juice in my hand.

I accepted it without thinking, leaning against the table and sulking to myself. Again, I wasn't really paying attention, so when I drank half of the juice she passed me, I didn't question it, not until she looked to me with wide eyes and a panicked expression.

"Oh my God, stop!" she exclaimed.

I jumped at her loudness before looking to her with confusion. "What?"

Still rattled, her eyes fell to the glass in my hand. "You just drank that!"

I straightened up and quirked a brow. "So?"

Stumbling over her words, she finally got out a coherent sentence. "I have no idea what that is!"

It took a moment for her words to digest, and then my own eyes widened and I looked down at the drink. Quickly putting it down on the table, I took a step back worriedly.

"Why would you do that?!" she asked with disbelief.

"I was thirsty, I thought you were giving me a drink!" I cried out.

She stomped her foot with irritation. "No, what the hell, Y/N?! I'm not a bartender!"

I tried to calm down, taking a deep breath, but the fact that I just sipped an unknown substance from Doctor Strange's office wasn't an easy thing to accept.

"Now what?" I asked Kate as if she would know, though it was her fault this happened anyway.

"I don't freakin' know!"

She exhaled deeply, exchanging nervous glances with me before we both looked to the scary-looking orange drink.

"Erm, how do you feel?" she asked after a moment, talking slowly like I was going to grow a second head or something.

I looked down at myself carefully. "Fine, I guess..."

This reassured her as she let out a breath of relief. "Okay, good. Maybe it wasn't a big deal."

The raised pitch in her voice didn't do much to reassure me, and I suddenly remembered where we were.

"He's going to kill us if he finds out," I muttered to her.

She put her hands on her hips, nodding slowly. "Probably. But he won't find out."

I gave her a knowing look. "Kate, I think he's gonna notice."

She shook her head, in denial. "He's on a mission and won't be back for a while. He won't realise."

I pursed my lips, chewing on my bottom one nervously. Technically Kate was right, he wouldn't notice. But if he did, we were dead. I couldn't help but think how this was the stupid, immature stuff Wanda didn't like about me. Maybe she was right.

Glancing at the glass once more, I picked it up and held it out to Kate. "Drink it."

She stepped back instinctively. "What? No way!"

I glared at her. "If I'm gonna die because of you, you're coming with me!"

She shook her head, stepping back slowly. "No way. It was an accident. Your fault, not mine."

"Kate Bishop, if you don't–"

"No!"

I chased her around the office for a minute, eventually managing to catch her when she cornered herself between a bookshelf and a desk.

"I hate you," she mumbled, and I rolled my eyes.

"Just drink it."

She stuck her tongue out at me before snatching the glass from my hand and taking a small sip. She pulled a face and I eyed her suspiciously.

"So...?" I raised an eyebrow. "How do you feel?"

She shook her head. "I feel perfectly fine, drama queen."

I ignored her sass, and the dèjà vu I felt from Wanda and I's break up argument, and relaxed. "Okay, fine. We're both fine. Maybe it was just a drink."

"A drink that tastes like foot," she complained as she returned the glass to where she found it.

"I didn't think it tasted that bad," I said with a shrug, and she rolled her eyes.

"Let's just get out of here. She frowned, glancing around the office. "It's not so fun anymore."

I nodded in agreement and we both rushed to the door to leave, silently agreeing to never set foot in there again. In our attempt at scrambling away from there in a panic, we walked right into someone else and I lost my breath when I saw it was Wanda. Her green eyes widened slightly when she saw me, before she glanced over at Kate, too.

"Hi, Wanda," Kate said with an innocent smile, waving.

Wanda returned her smile halfheartedly, and I knew my presence was making her uncomfortable.

"Hey, Kate," she replied, eyes avoiding mine, before she nodded and walked around us.

I watched her walk away, eyes glued to her retreating form, before Kate nudging me pulled me from my thoughts. I sighed quietly, trying to push the stinging feeling away and focus on something else. But she was making it so damn hard to.

————————

That night was absolute hell for me, and I had no idea why.

I tried to go to sleep, but I just couldn't. Every position I got into was uncomfortable; my legs were always twisted, my head always felt heavy and my eyes just wouldn't close despite how tired they were. And when I finally did get to sleep, I kept waking up, always close to fully passing out but never close enough.

As if that wasn't worse enough, I ended up waking up to an alarm I didn't remember setting. Still half asleep, I caught a glimpse of the big red numbers on the digital clock, reading 6.00am. Never in a million years would I wake up that early, not even as an Avenger and definitely not voluntarily, so I groaned and turned it off before falling back asleep without a second thought.

When I finally woke up on my own accord, I rubbed my eyes and half-consciously walked to the ensuite in my room, only to jump when I walked right into the wall.

"What the..."

This wasn't my room. I looked around with furrowed brows, realising I was in Kate's room. When the hell did I fall asleep in Kate's room? And where was she if that was the case?

Putting it down as a mystery I could solve later, I made my way to Kate's ensuite which was on the opposite side of the room than mine, hence me misstepping and hitting the wall before. I yawned tiredly, stretching my arms, before facing the mirror and immediately screaming at my reflection.

"What the fuck?!" I shouted to myself, closing and opening my eyes again in case I was imagining things.

"Miss Bishop, are you alright?" F.R.I.D.A.Y said over the speaker in the bathroom.

When I leaned closer to see my reflection, I wasn't looking back at myself, but rather the face of Kate Bishop.

"No!" I shouted, hands touching my face. "I'm Y/N!"

F.R.I.D.A.Y. asked, "Would you like me to call Y/N to your room?"

I looked up at nothing. "What? No! I am Y/N!"

Looking down at my body, I noticed how much taller I was, the difference in my body shape, the long dark hair over my shoulders. I felt like me, but this wasn't me. 

"I'm sorry, Miss Bishop, but I do not understand," F.R.I.D.A.Y. said, and I had never been more confused in my life.

"Where's Kate?!" I asked with impatience, trying to figure out whether this was a very vivid dream or not.

"You are Kate, Miss Bishop," F.R.I.D.A.Y. said, and I didn't think A.I.'s could get confused, but this one sounded it.

Nope, there was no way. I was definitely going to pass out. What the hell was happening?

Suddenly, an incessant knocking was coming from the bedroom door and I had no choice but to go and answer it, hoping it would be the real Kate and she'd know what the hell was going on.

"Clint," I breathed out, when I saw it was him who was there. Maybe he could help. "Thank God. Listen, I–"

"You missed training," he said with a clipped tone, arms crossed and eyes narrowed.

"What?"

"I was waiting for two hours and you never showed!" he snapped.

I blinked, trying to figure out what he was talking about. Was this a dream? It had to be a dream.

"Well?" he said with annoyance. "D'you have anything to say?!"

I shook my head, trying to find the right words. "I don't– where's Kate?"

He rolled his eyes, sighing. "I don't know what game you're playing, Kate, but it better not happen again. Especially since you're the one who begged me for the morning sessions!"

And with that, he turned on his heel and stormed off, grumbling to himself about annoying archers and lazy kids, presumably me. Or rather, in this case, Kate. It had to be Kate he thought he was talking to because I never trained with Clint, and never that early.

This couldn't be happening. It made no sense. He thought I was Kate and so did F.R.I.D.A.Y., and my reflection was in agreement. I looked down at myself with a puzzled expression. If I was in Kate's body it seemed, then where the hell was my body? Everybody believed I was Kate, so the real Kate must be...

Oh, God, she was in me, wasn't she?

Without giving it a second thought, I immediately ran down the many hallways of the compound and to my bedroom, the only logical place that Kate could be. When I rounded the corner, I ran straight into someone else and almost brought us both to the ground if not for my quick reflexes.

"Shoot, sorry," I apologised quickly, before letting go of the person because it was Wanda, and she would kill me if I touched her.

"It's okay, don't worry about it," she said sweetly, offering me a small smile, and I froze because she was looking right at me and not an ounce of hurt or hatred was in her eyes. "Everything alright, Kate?" she asked when I didn't speak, and I blinked when I realised who she thought I was. It was the only explanation for the way she was acting.

"Uh-huh," I squeaked out.

She tilted her head slightly, confused. "You're very odd this morning. Maybe you should head back to sleep and wake up again."

I forced out an awkward chuckle at her joke and she was very confused when she walked away, leaving me alone and giving me a moment to stay focused. But it was hard when it had been a whole month since she'd spoken to me without bitterness, and I'd missed it more than I realised.

Snapping back into reality, I continued to go to my bedroom before knocking on the door frantically. It opened quite quickly, and I jumped back instinctively when I came face to face with myself. The other person, presumably Kate, did the same, and we both paused for a moment, studying ourselves in each other's bodies.

She was wearing exactly what I'd been wearing when I went to sleep last night. My face, body, hair – everything – was mine, but I wasn't in there. And it was creepy to say the least. Is that what I looked like to other people?

"This is insane," I said quietly, still in disbelief. "It's you, Kate, isn't it?"

She nodded slowly, as shocked as I was. "You're me."

"And you're me."

She looked me up and down – or, I guess, I looked me up and down, but it was her, wasn't it? – and her eyes settled on my head. "Have my bangs always been uneven? Why did nobody tell me?"

I refrained from making a comment and instead said, "Forget that. We need to talk."

"But it looks kinda stupid," she said distractedly, still caught up on my– her hair. "Especially if I'm a superhero now. All I'm gonna be known as is the girl with uneven bangs–"

"Kate!" I shouted, before pushing her backwards into my bedroom. "Shush!"

She focused on me when I closed the door behind us, nodding. "Right, yeah."

It was insane. She looked and sounded exactly like me.

"I can't believe it," I said with disbelief, touching her hair, before meeting her gaze. "Everybody thinks I'm you."

She raised her eyebrows. "Really?"

"Yeah... Kate, what the hell happened?"

She shook her head. "I'm just as confused as you, Y/N. I don't know."

"Fuck, okay, erm... let's see." I began to pace as I tried to piece everything together. "I went to sleep in my bed last night. Couldn't sleep much. Then I woke up in your bed this morning to that stupid alarm."

"Oh, shoot, I had training with Clint this morning!" Kate realised with wide eyes.

I waved a hand dismissively. "Yeah, well you missed that." She groaned but I ignored it as I shook my head. "I don't get it. What happened?"

She sighed, sitting at the edge of my desk. "I don't know... I did the same thing as you."

I tried to think about yesterday in general, about what could have caused this.

"Oh, no," she said in a voice that wasn't promising, and I looked up to see her looking at me guiltily. "I think I might know what caused this."

"What?"

A sheepish smile appeared on her lips, and it was still so strange seeing myself looking back at me.

"The drink we sipped in Strange's office," she said reluctantly. "We both took a sip."

Fuck, she was right...

I groaned loudly, smacking my head. "I knew it was bad! For God's sake, Kate!"

"Hey, I never made you drink it!" she said defensively. "If anything, you made me drink it!"

I closed my eyes, trying not to get angry. "This is why I need to make more friends my own age..."

She pouted in response. "Hurtful."

Is this what Wanda meant? Probably.

"Now what?" I asked with a frown.

She threw her hands up in defeat. "I don't know. I guess we gotta tell everyone. Maybe they can fix this."

I raised my eyebrows with disbelief. "Are you kidding? Kate, they'll kill us! Especially Strange when he finds out you were nosing around in his stuff!"

"We," she corrected with narrowed eyes. "It was a team effort in case you forgot."

I facepalmed. "We can't tell them... maybe we can figure it out ourselves. There's got to be some sort of instruction manual, right? Let's just– let's just go back to his office and see."

She exhaled deeply before nodding. "Okay, good plan. Come on."

We both made a move to leave, but as soon as she opened the door, we came face to face with Natasha who had her hand raised like she was about to knock. She lowered it and nodded.

"Great, you're up," she said, looking between us, before her eyes settled on Kate. "I need your help with some S.H.I.E.L.D. recruits today."

I groaned quietly. "Do I have to?"

Natasha blinked, looking to me. "You don't have to, Kate, no, but Y/N here does, yeah."

I sighed inwardly when I realised she thought I was Kate. This was going to be a pain in my arse if it wasn't sorted soon.

Natasha looked to Kate, who was simply staring at her without an expression, and only when I nudged her in the side did she spring back to life.

"Right!" she exclaimed, perking up. "Sorry, yes, the recruits. Of course."

Natasha eyed her suspiciously, glanced at me, then nodded. "Great... I think. Meet me in the gym in twenty minutes?"

Kate nodded, flashing Natasha a small smile. "Yes, of course."

Natasha nodded with satisfaction before doing the same to me. "Catch you later, Kate."

I smiled awkwardly and waved goodbye as she walked away. Only when I was certain she was out of hearing distance did I let out a quiet sigh, already beginning to feel the tension from this stupid mistake.

"We're gonna have to look for the instructions later," I said regretfully. "Until then, nobody can know about this."

Kate looked nervous. "Easier said than done, Y/N."

"It's okay, we'll be fine," I assured her, trying to believe it myself. "Just try to get through training with Nat and then you can meet me outside of Strange's office afterwards."

Kate was panicked now. "I don't think I can pretend to be you."

I shrugged. "You're gonna have to. And you can't let Nat know otherwise."

She gave me a wide-eyed look. "Seriously? Have you met Natasha? She's terrifying!"

"She's not that bad," I assured her. "Just... don't be an idiot. She hates idiots. And I am not an idiot." This didn't seem to help, as Kate was getting paler by the second, so I added, "It's okay, you'll be fine. Just channel your inner me. You know how I am. We hang out enough, don't we?"

She breathed out slowly, nodding. "Right. Inner you. I can do that."

"Good. Training the S.H.I.E.L.D. recruits is easy. Nat usually takes the lead and I follow, so just behave and listen to her and it'll be okay. And please don't embarrass me."

"I won't," she said with a nod. "I got this."

I wasn't so sure if I believed that, but I had no choice, so I nodded, too. "Okay. I'm gonna try to lay low until after."

"Okay, I should get changed," she said, looking down, before backing up into my room. "I'll see you soon."

I stepped into the hall and looked to her. "See you. And remember, Kate, nobody can know. You're Y/N this morning, okay?"

She nodded and closed the door. I let out a shaky breath, hoping we could both keep it up until after training.

Having no choice but to trust Kate had this under control, I headed back to her room to get changed into something she'd wear to lounge around in the compound. After I assured myself I looked okay, I went to the kitchen to get some breakfast. Nobody was there apart from Clint, who was sat on the couch with a cup of coffee and watching the news. He didn't comment on my arrival, so I decided to stick to myself and make a bowl of cereal.

As I was minding my own business, pouring my cereal and milk into a bowl, I almost missed the presence of Wanda who walked into the kitchen not long after.

"Morning," she greeted, and I jumped out of my skin when she passed behind me, because I wasn't expecting her to be so close to me. She paused, glancing at me with concern. "Are you okay this morning, Kate? You're acting strange."

Swallowing hard, I tried not to overthink acting like the archer Wanda believed I was. And then I remembered that Wanda could read minds and all she'd have to do is glance into mine right now to know the truth.

"I'm fine," I said, wondering how long this pretence would last. "Just didn't get enough sleep."

Before Wanda could reply, Clint chirped up from the couch without sparing a look our way. "Really? Because you slept right through training, so I figured you'd had enough."

Wanda quirked a brow of amusement, looking to me questioningly.

I cleared my throat and explained, "I accidentally slept through my alarm and missed a session with Clint this morning."

She tried not to laugh. "Don't worry about it, Clint will lighten up. One time, back when I was new here, I basically did the same thing. He wasn't happy then either, but he got over it."

"It's not hard to keep to a schedule!" Clint grumbled from the couch.

Wanda rolled her eyes playfully, resting a hand on the small of my back and sending shivers down my spine. "It's just the dad in him getting annoyed."

I smiled nervously as she let go to grab a mug from the cupboard.

"So, what have you got planned today?" she asked, trying to make conversation, but she was completely oblivious to my racing heart and sweaty palms.

It was stupid to feel like this, but she hadn't spoken to me properly in so long and I'd missed it. She thought I was Kate, obviously, hence why she was being so nice, but it was better than what I'd been getting from her lately, so I played along.

"Not much," I answered after a moment. "It's kind of a lazy day."

"It wasn't supposed to be," Clint mumbled, and I ignored him as Wanda flashed me a smile.

"Sounds nice," she said politely, before grabbing her cup of coffee. "Enjoy it, Kate. There's not many of those around here."

I hummed distractedly, unable to tear my gaze from her as she nodded my way before leaving the kitchen. Only when she left did I let out a quiet breath of relief. For whatever reason, Wanda didn't know the truth. She either wasn't reading my mind or couldn't, but whichever it was, I hoped it stayed that way. At least until Kate and I could fix this mess.

The last thing I needed was Wanda finding out the truth. This is one of those things she'd consider immature about me, only proving her right about our breakup, and I was not about to give her more ammo to prove her right.

————————

I found myself waiting outside of Strange's office for ten more minutes than I was supposed to when Kate finally showed up, looking sweaty and tired. Did I really look like that after training? Gross.

Trying to stay focused, I gave her a look of disbelief. "Finally! You're late!"

She caught her breath as she leaned against the wall momentarily. "Sorry. Natasha hung around afterwards and started talking to me, well you, about the breakup and I had to pretend to act all sad and mopey, and it was hard!"

I frowned, offended. "I'm not all sad and mopey."

She rolled her eyes. "You are, but never mind that. C'mon, let's fix this."

We both headed inside Strange's office and split up to find some sort of clue to what was going on with us and how we could fix it. But it was difficult since Strange had a lot of stuff and barely any of it made sense.

"Ooh, okay, I think I got something!" Kate called five minutes into our search, and I went over to her hopefully. "There's something here about switching bodies, which is what we did."

"No shit, Sherlock."

She ignored me and continued to scan the pages of a book in her hands. "It says it's temporary which is good." I let out a relieved breath as she continued. "But it requires some sort of concoction for us to revert back to normal."

"That's not so bad," I said with a nod. "What is it?"

She frowned, looking up at me. "I don't know. It's written in something I don't understand."

I snatched the book from her hands impatiently. "Let me see that..."

To my regret, Kate was right and the page indicating the reversion drink was barely legible. I cursed under my breath and tried not to rip the page out of frustration.

"We need Strange's help," she said regretfully.

I sighed. "I know."

Her eyes were swimming with guilt and fear. "We're both dead."

I frowned. "I know."

And with that lovely revelation, the two of us left everything where we found it, yet again, and tracked down Steve with hopes he could help us find Strange, or somehow contact him.

"I'm sorry, ladies, but he can't be contacted," Steve said when we found him in one of the conference rooms preparing a mission brief. "He's gone for another month and is on a strict no-contact mission."

"Steve, please," I begged with a pout. "We need to talk to him about something important."

He shrugged helplessly. "It's impossible, Kate, I'm sorry."

Kate and I exchanged worried glances, thinking the same thing. We were screwed.

"What's got you so desperate anyway?" he asked curiously.

I didn't answer, trying to think of an excuse, but Kate didn't seem to get the hint as she let out a sigh and opened her mouth to speak, about to tell the truth.

"We kind of went into–"

I pinched her hip, making her jump and Steve look to me with confusion.

"It's not important," I assured Steve. "We just had a lot of questions about magic."

Steve nodded, though seemed reluctant to believe me. "Okay... well he'll be back in a month like I said. You can wait until then."

I nodded and grabbed Kate's arm, dragging her away before she could somehow spill the beans like the idiot she was. Once we were out of sight from Steve, I shoved her into the wall.

"Ow!" she said dramatically, giving me a look.

"Are you crazy?!" I whisper-shouted to her. "You almost told him!"

She looked at me like I was insane. "I know! Why wouldn't we?"

I raised my brows. "Er, how about the fact that this is very embarrassing?"

She shook her head. "Look, it was a silly mistake. Steve will understand if we just explain. Same with the others, I'm sure."

I massaged my forehead at Kate's naivety. "Oh, Kate, dear. I've been an Avenger a lot longer than you. Respectfully, you're an idiot."

She crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes at me.

"They expect this sort of dumb stuff from you, no offence," I explained, making her shove me which I ignored, "but not from me. I will get ridiculed forever. They'll make fun of me and simultaneously be disappointed at how stupid I was. And Wanda, she'll–"

I paused, the redhead's face coming to mind. She would probably say I told you so, this proving her right about her claims of how childish I was. We may have been broken up, but I didn't want her to view me like that. I didn't want to prove her right.

"It's okay," Kate said, resting a hand on my shoulder when she immediately read my expression, knowing what I was thinking.

"It's not," I said with a frown, already embarrassed at the thought of the rest of the team finding out about this stupid mishap. They looked to me like an equal, and this silly mistake would immediately put me at the bottom of the hierarchy. I couldn't have that. "We can hold out until Strange gets back."

Kate dropped her hand, surprised. "You know what you just said, right?"

I did, and I wasn't too convinced with myself, but it was the only way to avoid crippling embarrassment. Could I pretend to be Kate for a month? Surely it couldn't be too difficult. After all, I'd spent enough time with her to know her mannerisms and such. Everybody could believe it. And it was the same with Kate. She knew me inside out. This could work, surely.

"We can do it," I said with certainty, nodding. "It's only a month. That's nothing. We just have to lay low and not draw attention to ourselves and nobody will be none the wiser."

She groaned lowly, pulling a face. "Y/N, I'm not too sure..."

"You owe me," I reminded her.

"You took the sip yourself," she said with an eye roll.

"You took me to his damn office in the first place!" I retorted, and she knew I had her there because she groaned louder this time.

"Fine," she gave in after a few seconds.

"So, agreed?" I confirmed with a raised brow. "We'll be each other for the month?"

She still seemed opposed to the idea, but nodded reluctantly. "I'll be you."

"And I'll be you."

And we shook on it, ready to give it a go.