#she's getting better with emotional maturity and i'm getting better at other stuff

[popcorn-plots]

just some. personal rants i've been thinking about

little bit deep, but my parents don't know i'm trans/enby so I can't really share it with them, but I just had a realization about being trans/enby and how I've struggled a lot with the fact that I don't experience as much dysphoria as someone else. When I was just starting out, I thought I was faking it or somehow doing it wrong because I didn't feel the dysphoria I've heard so much about. Like, I don't feel like I was born in the wrong body, I just don't like certain aspects of it, and I've never felt comfortable being referred to with feminime terms, and a 'girl' is not who I am. But then I kept thinking about the euphoria part, of someone using the correct pronouns, referring to me as a person or a human being, and using the right name and how it's this overwhelming feeling of joy, but I don't feel that. Sure, I'll smile. It feels good to be seen, but I don't feel that overpowering joy. For a while, I had that thought that maybe I'm not trans, because I don't feel the dysphoria or the euphoria. I just exist. I know there's more than one way to be trans, but it never felt like I fit.

Then, I started thinking about it and I wonder if part of it is because of the way I was raised. Not by societal expectations, but by an emotionally immature parent. Being raised without any validation and rarely any praise. Where I had to walk on eggshells around my mom. I wonder if it got to the point where I don't know what pride feels like. I don't know what it feels like to be proud of myself, because why would I? I did a task. Congratulations, move on, there are other things to do. I have no idea how to be happy about something I did. I wonder if because I was never validated as a child, I struggle to validate myself. I have a really hard time even appreciating myself because I spent so much time appreciating others.

I wonder if that's translated into me being trans and not just my everyday life. Where I find it so incredibly hard to feel any kind of pride or joy or happiness from something I did, because I was never appreciated as a kid.

[followerofmercy]

I think Freminet has some of the most interesting dissonance in his self perception of any Genshin character.

Like, of the Hearthlings we know, he's one of the most emotionally mature and intelligent. Lynette might still have him beat, but after playing her hangout... I dunno. I think they're tied. Lyney is Crumbling, Alrecchino is. Well. Arlecchino. Everyone else is a deeply traumatized child or adult and Freminet seems to pretty regularly be people's emotional support. His character stories talk about getting his vision by saving a bunch of other kids on a dive that went bad. The Selkie event literally had him being a therapist for a grownass woman, citing his past experiences with all the other Hearthlings that have died or killed themselves. And he handled that situation WELL. Yeah, he seems to live in a fantasy, but goddamn he's alive and a lot of people in his position aren't so clearly something is working.

Either his or Lyney's character story talks about the time Freminet had reached out to Lyney to try to ease his burdens, which resulted in Lyney blowing up at him. That probably contributed to Freminet thinking he's not good at it, but I think the reason Lyney reacted so badly was BECAUSE Freminet is actually a good support. He can't allow himself that from the little brother he's supposed to protect.

Freminet seems to both cry and dissociate often, but like... Kiddo you are in fact the only person in this family actually processing your emotions. Lynette dissociates 24/7. Arlecchino. Lyney lies and tells everyone he's fine and would literally rather die than admit otherwise. In comparison, Freminet is doing FANTASTIC

Freminet also gets a lot out of helping people! Like anyone, he needs to feel useful and needed. He seems to be an excellent mentor to the younger Hearthlings and perfectly competent on his own, but when you put him in a room with Lyney and Lynette who baby him and insist that THEY take care of HIM, he withdraws into himself.

Like, Freminet by himself feels like a young man and Freminet with the magician twins feels like a teenager. I have no idea how old he actually is. Logically, he would be OLDER than them! He's been with the House much, much longer and his experience shows. I think it's fascinating that they love him SO MUCH and yet, they just Cannot let him help them. Which is hurting him.

(Lynette is much better about not babying him and that is probably why their relationship is so much better than Freminet and Lyney's. Also why she keeps having to mediate between them. Because Lyney charges off trying to Fix Everything and that just makes Freminet feel useless and he doesn't want to get in the way and- you get the point)

Idk. It's hard to tell what things the previous director said to him vs what Arlecchino has said to him. I'm inclined to think our Arlecchino was the one that said he cries too much, but in a "crying in front of your enemies will get you killed" way and she herself is too fucked up to realize how "you cry too much" could be damaging.

Also I try not to consider gameplay stuff when it comes to story, but Freminet also has some of the most BRUTAL animations. He SMASHES HIS EMOTIONAL SUPPORT METAL PENGUIN INTO HIS ENEMY'S FACE. He doesn't think he's the most amazing fighter, and by Fatui standards he probably isn't, but he is winning fights against most grown men.

Tldr Freminet thinks he cries too much and is a burden and isn't good at helping people when he's actually the most mentally stable Hearthling send tweet

[patentedsun]

You guys I'm actually crying over chapter 204.5 (which is technically an ad for a certain company we're all boycotting btw) but ignoring the actual ad THE STORYLINE WAS SO??? GOOD???? the Natsu characterization in this was INCREDIBLE (be prepared for intense 100yq hatred) and it portrayed exactly why I fell in love with nalu in the first place....

Summary and analysis below (doesn't incl all the pages btw!!)

We start off with Lucy finding Natsu and Happy at her place, as always.

this is followed by him being like "do you think we'll peek or something" which... 100yq natsu would have... that IMPOSTER...

Anyways while she's taking a bath, Natsu and Happy are browsing around Lucy's room and find a book that stands out. (Btw right next to this book is her diary, 100yq natsu would've gone straight for that). However they end up accidentally destroying it and start panicking. They ask Lucy if they can "borrow it" and Lucy panics at first, saying it's precious and not to touch it, but relents when they say they found it "interesting".

fast forward, we see them worn out after trying and failing to find a replacement copy. ONCE AGAIN, they're doing this because it's something precious to LUCY. Not because they care about reading, or because the book has any value to them, but because they understand it's important to HER. Natsu (and Happy) going the extra mile for things that are important to Lucy is SUCH AN IMPORTANT PART of their entire dynamic.

continuing, Lucy walks into the guild and asks how they're finding the book, they say it's interesting. Lucy gets SUPER EXCITED ABOUT THIS and starts talking non stop ab the book. Happy asks her why this book is so important to her and...

Y I K E S.

So yeah, they ultimately decide that lying isn't it and they should apologize upfront.

this is so beautiful to me, idk like the imagery of them bowing so sincerely is so.... and like wow MASHIMA seems like natsu IS capable of acknowledging his own wrongdoings and offering genuine apologies. I'm not even talking ab the whole post tartaros situation no, I'm talking about fucking 100yq, where natsu actually physically hurts Lucy and doesn't apologize for it (AND IN FACT ITS PLAYED FOR A GAG)(IMPOSTER!!! NOT MY NATSU!!!)

Soooo Lucy doesn't take it well and runs away.

the fact that they didn't stop their search here. the fact that they EXPANDED it to other towns to try and find her the book THIS IS JUST <3333

Anyways, Lucy returns and reveals dozens of copies of the book...

My heart actually broke for her here because as someone who ig creates stuff as well, it really can be painful to have no audience interaction. And to have a book you wrote bomb like that...ouch... and of course she would've been excited, her best friends told her they found it interesting!!! my HEART. OUCH. and the sheer guilt on Natsu and Happy's faces here 😭 Once again, 100yq would've played this off for a gag...

And they all start bawling (and the ad comes in so I will stop there) but YEAH. THIS WAS SO BEAUTIFUL??? The way she's regretful too, the way they're still trying to apologize and make her feel better I'm :(. This is what makes nalu work and it feels like mashima is forgetting that ab his own work... they're both genuinely good and kind to each other... like not to get sidetracked but there has always been goofy fanservice moments but there were also so many wonderful, emotional, complex scenes with them with depth and maturity and I just feel like that's lacking now. So reading this was like getting punched in the face srsly because wow... THIS is the natsu I know and love ugh .....

[kanmom51]

Public service notice

Remember how I said I haven't blocked you just yet @chaotickoalacat ?

Well, got your reply ask, and let me tell you this:

I'm really tempted to do it right now.

I am not going to answer this ask, more so because I know how you will be literally crucified in the comments not only for the utter nonsense you are spewing but the way you are doing so.

I will address a couple of things you are saying though. Because seriously dude, I'm in utter shock as to how you are actually able to come up with this stuff.

You believe MHJ? Really?

You tell me that because she created NJ then her saying that Illit are copying her then that's it? It must be true? She also said that BTS copied her concepts in the past, that true too? You are aware of the fact that she is all about the visuals and has nothing to do with the music part of things, right? Just checking.

And in the same breath you are also full on acknowledging that she was the one behind the BTS leaks, including the damaging leak of JM's private info.

So, let me get this straight, you have no issue in believing a person that is untrustworthy and moved to hurt your fave, as long as it suits your current agenda? Seriously? I kind of think that once untrustworthy always untrustworthy. Or in your world is it once untrustworthy sometimes trust worthy as long as what's coming out of their mouth is what I want to hear?

Btw, you most definitley showed your true colours with the whole "JK's fling" idiocy. Prey tell me what does it say about JM, or more so, what does it say about what you think about JM if he sticks by JK's side while JK, in your warped mind, is an untrustworthy copy cat cheater? You must think so highly of JM for sticking by JK's side when JK treats him like shit (according to your warped views).

And let me make my views clear as day here. JK did not copy JM nor is JK an asshole cheater that can't keep his dick to himself. Balloon busted for you, I guess.

And yes, we are both BTS fans (or are we? cause you seem to be a solo stan and not a fan of BTS the band and all it's members), but clearly you lack the basic emotional intelligence that someone who is mature enough and with some life and long term relationship experience has. Either you are very young and inexperienced or for some reason lack that healthy relationship experience. Because thinking so low of JK and yet believing at the same time that JM would stick around someone like that, yeah, there is something lacking in your life experience. Maybe no experience, maybe bad experience, maybe too much Kdrama watching experience. Whichever it is, please, do not try and compare us.

There is NO comparison.

You say that you don't view JM as a damsel in distress, that he is a strong person, stronger than JK seeing how well he did in the army. Let me start by saying what a load of bull (not the him being strong part, but the part where you claim you aren't out to 'save' him). He's strong when it suits you, which is when you want to prove he's better than JK and/or the others (I'll get into how disgusting and disrespectful that comparison you are making is in a second). But at the same time he, supposedly in your fantasy world, allows JK and the company to step all over him, to copy his ideas and creativity and to scorn him and mess around with others, and continues to play along with their game, of showing up for JK, going on trips with him, enlisting with him even after he's supposedly, again, been mistreated, disrespected, cheated on. I would kind of suggest that you make up your mind which is it?

As for this constant comparison with the others when it comes to their army service, I've been vocal about this in the past and I will say it again. It sickens me how disrespectful you are towards not only the other BTS members, each and every one of them doing their utmost best within their army placement, but it's disrespectful towards every single other SK young man that is doing their compulsory military service. How easy it is sitting on your comfy chair in the safety of your own home or wherever it is you are sitting, which isn't an actual war zone, behind your screen and keyboard, grading these young men that have left their lives behind for 18 months to enlist into active duty in a military that is at war with another country. Please have more respect not only for every single one of the members (each serving at their utmost best within their assigned duties) but also for all the other young men that are doing just the same. JM is amazing, he's assigned duties are utilizing his high level of intelligence and mathematical abilities. Kudos to him for excelling at it. But why is it so hard for you to say that and at the same time say the same about each and every other member? Why is there this need not only to uplift one, but to do so at the expense of the other, diminishing what the other is doing? This whole attitude is just so childish and stupid. And you know what? Like I said, it's disrespectful not only to the other members and to every single other soldier, but also to JM, who doesn't need to bring down the others to show just how amazing he is.

This is it. Let me make this as clear as day that even if I end my sentences with a question mark, it's a rhetorical question and not an invitation for your response. I will not reply to any more asks you might throw my way. Obviously you are intrenched in your ideas and opinions, as warped and unhealthy as they may be.

Good luck trying to save JM from the one person he is showing us all that he wants to spend every second, every minute, every hour with.

And good luck with it all when Jikook Karma strikes, cause it's coming and it's coming strong, and when it does come well, all those that lack the respect to either JK or JM, those who are willfully closing their eyes and ears to what they have been showing and telling us for years now...

...the day is coming when it can no longer be ignored.

[thewertsearch]

We're got a couple of assorted asks about quadrant dynamics here. Since they're all related, I'll answer them as a single post.

@galaxa-13 asked: I personally never saw Feferi being annoyed by Eridan talking about feelings with Karkat because he was only supposed to talk about them with her, but rather because he ONLY talked about them with Karkat. She had to do all the heavy lifting in their relationship by making sure he didn't commit genocide, and then didn't get to unwind with some romantic gossip. If my platonic boyfriend never talked to me, but did with others, I'd question him too. @lilietsblog asked: I never read Feferi as being jealous of Karkat in a violating relationship exclusivity / cheating on her way. I read it as a playful "why aren't you talking about stuff with me? is it because you've already talked it all out?" where Eridan was very much supposed to read between the lines and undersatnd that she just wanted him to tell her about his red crushes (awkward, that…) While I'm sure there are specific rituals trolls /only/ do with their moirails, my overall impression is that trolls normally just… don't form relationships close and trusting enough for emotional support like that. The quadrants help by making it semi-mandatory to find SOMEONE. (Also I'm actually sure that a healthy moirallegiance would be reciprocal with both partners pacifying each other, it's just the hemospectrum version of gender roles)

You may have a point. Eridan was clearly a poor moirail from the start - probably because he never actually wanted to be Feferi's moirail. To him, the quadrant was clearly just a stepping stone to matespritship, so he wasn't invested in its dynamics. Feferi's not really angry about Karkat, here - she's just a little frustrated about how one-sided their moirallegence has turned out to be.

That said, I do still believe that quadrants would work better if they were polyamorous - even if this particular scenario doesn't illustrate my point as well as I thought it did.

@morganwick asked: I mean, some would argue that placing undue emphasis on monogamy beyond what's actually healthy or natural is true of human romance as well. But part of what might be going on here is that on Alternia, it's not a good idea to let knowledge of your fears, doubts, and weaknesses spread too far, lest it mark you for culling. Best to vent to a single person who won't tell another soul. (See also how Vriska is saying things to John she wouldn't tell any other troll.) @bladekindeyewear asked: "At the end of the day, I do think moirallegiance is a good idea. I just don’t think it really works if moirails can’t be poly." What if they CAN be? People with naturally polyamorous inclinations are few and marginalized on present-day Earth, and Alternian society seems set up to STOMP OUT the marginalized. Quadrants certainly exist, but how much of their rigidity and the pervasive troll view that you only have "one true fated partner(s)" for each quadrant might just be cultural?

I think a monogamous system of moirallegence is probably all that Alternia could handle. Sustaining a polyamorous quadrant system would require a level of emotional maturity that the average troll simply isn't going to have - and, like you said, it might be dangerous to widen your circle more than is actually necessary.

I still think the trolls would benefit from such a system, though. On Alternia, it simply wasn't to be - but the Alternian Players now have the chance to build an entirely new culture. Who knows what new dynamics they might discover?

@lilietsblog asked: I don't think Hussie "jumped the gun". I think Hussie was messing around with the very idea of "what romance should be like". Trolls don't care about what gender their partners are, and have a different system of confusing rigid rules that no two people understand quite the same and that don't work out in practice that way anyway, instead. The quadrant system was never intended to be a serious worldbuilding project any more than Troll Will Smith

See, I get what you're saying - but the difference, in my opinion, is that that Troll Will Smith was a one-panel joke, whereas the quadrant system has informed our understanding of troll relationships for the entirety of Act 5. Unlike Will, quadrants have stayed relevant, and they've been critical to understanding many of the Alternians' key character moments.

That's not to say that quadrants aren't partially a joke. Frankly, I don't think any of Homestuck is entirely serious - but I do think quadrants are 'real' in the context of the story, and should be analyzed as a legitimate part of its world.

@bladekindeyewear asked: One last bout moirails-- Andrew in his asks has said that the idea behind each of the Quadrants IS supposed to match up with real human relationship and friend dynamics we already understand, making them relatable but w/ a romantic drive that isn't quite human-analogous. Trolls biologically compelled to enter them before understanding them, a challenge "particularly tortuous for young trolls" (p2393), plus the 600 hour session makes sense of Eq/Nep's relationship's drastic evolution to me.

I've always been a little skeptical about this whole 'biological drive' angle for the quadrants - mostly because there are plenty of human biological drives that are either overstated, misinterpreted, or outright fabricated.

That's not to say that the trolls don't have some sort of compulsion to seek out quadrants. If it does exist, though, I hope it slowly fades, now that the trolls have left their planet and its expectations behind.

[memopmiff]

do you have any maiko headcanons? i love your artstyle btw <3

Thank you so much I'm glad you like it!

Here's some maiko headcanons

- Once everything is all settled (fire nation is stable, no threat to the throne) they can finally relax and be more open freely towards each other, that includes more kisses in hallways, laying near the pond and the occasional quick makeouts etc.

- They understand each other very well like the silent communication type. They also learn from their mistakes and get better at expressing their feelings as they grow older

- Zuko has the dopiest grin looking at Mai and she melts inside every time

- He’s the only one who knows that Mai is quite an affectionate person when they’re in private

- Mai reveals her pregnancy at the fountain (since izumi means fountain) and Zuko stops breathing and falls into it

- Even though they get better at communicating and expressing their emotions as they mature, their main love language is always touch

- Mai does Zuko’s hair in the mornings but sometimes Zuko offers to do her hair too and he’s pretty good at it!

- Mai is NOT am early riser. She also steals pillows

- And blankets

- Zuko loves cuddles. He would be very happy if Mai’s the one who initiates the cuddle (she’s the more timid of the two)

- Zuko thinks he got every sigh of her figured out but then he completely misread it, obliviously making things worse. Their relationship has bumps and it’s not always perfect, but they always make up for it

- Being firelord keeps Zuko up late at night, Mai lets him work until she thinks that he needs to rest that she forcefully drags him to bed

- Sometimes Mai falls back into her old habits and completely shuts off, but Zuko always gets through to her

- They’re the happiest with each other. She is his anchor and he is her world

- Shortly after Izumi was born, Zuko entertained the idea of having another kid. Mai gave him one look and Zuko went ‘Yep. 1 is enough.”

I like them in a specific way that's hard for me to describe into words but here's the light stuff! Sorry if these are cheesy, thanks for the ask!

[msp9]

THIS IS MY LIKES AND DISLIKES OF CHAOS THEORY ⚠️Spoilers below cut⚠️

When i first finished this season, I too like some people, was skeptical about it. I get why some people say its bad, I just thought it was very different from cc. At points the characters didin't feel like themsleves, the way some of them were written and the designs gave me a real hard time to get used to them. Also i felt as if it was just too much to process at times so i rewatched it and my final answer is that its a good show the pacing is incredeble, the plot, the suspence and character development. i just had a hard time getting used to everything new? Ig. I'm still doubting whether its a 10 but sure thing is that it was a very good first season its a easy 9/10. So here are the thinks i liked abt it:

-THE WAY THEY POTRAYED EVERYONES TRAUMA/STRUGGLES , Sammy having anxiety, Yaz overcoming her ptsd, and KENJI. MY BOY. That must have been the best breakdown i've seen in animated series. Whoever wrote that scene. Wow. It was the best thing in the whole show honestly. His vision gtting blurry, having truble breathing. The panick. Wow. I CANNOT SAY THIS LOUD ENOUGH.

-Ben and Sammy duo? Hello? Im srry to say but you might just be better than Yaz and Ben duo. Idk i really loved them.

- "Benjamin."

- Showing Yaz is doing better. Despite her ongoing struggles, she has clearly grown and matured the last 6 years, and the way she calmed Sammy in the sinking van? Ig all those therapy sessions and college paid off. That scene is a clear illustration of the progress she has made. I mean sammy did say "i can tell shes still struggling" but there wasnt really a clear scene of her getting stuck in place as she used to. So my guess is that it was just Sammys anxiety and the fact that they didint talk much. Bc then Sammy was surprised how she kept herselve together. So yeah

-YASAMMY. NOTHING MORE TO ADD.

-UM SAMMYS CHARACTER?? HELLO? GLOW UP, CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT, i loved her sm. She moved up to my top 3.

And her anxiety? It was so well shown too

-the fight between Sammy and Yaz felt so natural and not at all forced. They both had valid points and in the end they did understand each other and were on the same page.

-Ben being Ben in almost every episode

- Yasmina's "boo."

-Brooklynns design?? Majestic to say the least.

- ingore what i said ealrier abt the acting out of character. They do remind themsleves they just grew

Well, all except Ben...

-Kenjis new voice actor, he did a real good job, as much as it doesn't sound like him, he really captured some emotional scenes very well.

- The robot lady. THEY REALLY SAID TAKE A WOMAN AND MAKE HER CREEPY ASF. I was genunanly creeped out. And the detail that at the ranch if u listen closesly u can hear the whistle. Hell nah that was scary.

-Benrius Ben and Darius friendship, okay actually u can't tell me u didint feel it too, the tention between ben and Darius cmon we all know what u are Ben stop making up girlfriends in Europe

-Brooklynn turning bad, or from what we are told worked for bad people ig. Personally as much as it shocked me, im sure theres a good reason as to why and i cant wait to hear more abt in season 2.

-I can now undertand what everyone meant in reviews saying "its more mature" not only in the more death and dinos but it woyud be kind of confusing for a younger audience to undertsand some stuff in this show.

-I really liked Daniels kon death, maybe it wasn't necesarry but im all in for that dark death scene.

-Lastly the comment Sammy makes when Ben asks how bumpy got pregnant, and the yazs smirk. Gurl i was suprised they added that but i loved it

Now, the things that i didint like and why:

- First of all, Darius being in love with brooklynn. I mean i get it but i also dont get it. In my opinion, there shouldn't have been a different reason as to why Darius was the most effected by her death. They were close and she died. Its okay to be really effected by someones death and not bc u liked them, and i also do believe that the reason for him not showing up the night she "died" should have been smth more serious. Then again i get it bc now he felt a lot more guilt bc it was for a not so important reason he didint show up and thats why he didint tell anyone. Well axtually it isnt that bad, but i just felt it was forced for the plot. This again could be bc i started to like kenlynn and now they turned the tables completly but sure.

-Brooklynns voice actor. I just couldn't connect her to brooklynn? She sounded a lot different, not a major bad thing it was just hard to get used to.

-Ben having a gf, or supposedly having one, u telling me this man has a gf:

I thought it funny but yk that man is a homosexual

- and lastly, Brooklynn being alive. This might sound bad but it made sense for her to die. And i was kinda lamed out that she wasnt dead. (Pls ironically enough, just weeks ago i begged for her to be alive.) But like the way everyone suffered bc of her death, going throught the 5 stages of grief, and the way the show was played. It just would have been better if she died, all those flashbacks, the emotional moments, i mean its not gonna be the same when i rewatch it bc i know shes alive. Anyways enough abt this.

Actually i have nothing more to add to my "bad stuff" list but i might come up with smth later. Bc i will be rewatchibg it obviously. Ig lastly i just wanted more episodes how dare they cutting the season of right there.

[guplia]

Hello anon! First of all, thanks for the ask! (asks? idk I received three anon asks at almost the same time, it would be weird if they didn't all come from the same person lol)

fic recommendations? read mine /hj Sure! Just note that while I've enjoyed a lot of wips, I'm only gonna recommend completed fics rn.

Okay! Here's all I can remember rn:

"Clouds" by youngmoInactive (fanfiction.net):

Original summary:

"Even though he's a hero, he's still a human. CONTAINS CHARACTER DEATH. A nice look into Kai's perspective as he watches a close friend slowly lose a fight for his life."

Okay all I've gotta say on this one is that IT MADE ME CRY. OVER AND OVER AGAIN. Obviously I can't speak for everyone who read this fic but I think this will hurt Lloyd lovers. I have re-read it so many times to the point where I have half the fic memorised word-by-word. This is a must-read.

(if you're on the phone it's better to add "m." To the start of the URL)

"a day in the life of a fatherless child" by holographicknife (Archive of Our Own):

Original summary:

"lloyd has a panic attack *confetti* title suggested by my friend lol loosely based on a crack rp between friend and i   Warning for: mentions of suicidal thoughts and medication, explicit descriptions of a panic attack, including tight chest, difficulty breathing, nausea, and headaches. Proceed with caution."

This is a Kai And Lloyd fic, and I love Kai And Lloyd fics! Specifically ones where they address Lloyd's trauma from Morro and where Kai comforts him. So if anyone's into this sort of stuff I'd recommend it!

"A Courageous Escape" by Lilac_Lily234 (Archive of Our Own):

Original summary:

"In the midst of possession Morro hatred flows freely as he seeks to make Lloyd suffer for taking what he believes as his rightful title, but his cruelty know no bounds; Lloyd however refuses to give up but knows that time is running out, and in his desperation will find either salvation, or death.  - I don't own Ninjago, this is an au"

Ahem... once again, Lloyd goes through pain. A season 5 canon-divergent AU, from which my favourite part was... you guessed it! Lloyd having a panic attack and being comforted! But it's still a cool story besides too, season 5 being one of the best seasons imo.

While this fic is finished, the AU is not but I think this one has a good ending on its own.

"Out for revenge" by lloyd_slander (Archive of Our Own):

Original summary:

"Harumi’s plan to resurrect Lord Garmadon failed, during her time in Kryptarium prison she heard about Morro, the master of wind, and guy who had managed to make Lloyd’s life a living hell. Wanting revenge, she doesn’t stop from anything, not even from getting Morro back from the dead. Or The duo we always wanted, but never got. Lloyd is in for a hard time. Head the tags, guys!"

Okay. This one is rated Mature for drug usage and blood (there was nothing sexual though)

So it's a Morro traumatising Lloyd fic again, but this time he's with Harumi! So it's double trouble for Lloyd! (things go VERY BAD for him >:3)

Honestly I can't say much except read the fic, the summary's right there lol.

"Revealed" by Nation_Ustria (Archive of Our Own):

Original summary:

"Lloyd Garmadon is used to being hated. That's just how his life works—if someone knows that he's the son of the warlord who attacks Ninjago City on a weekly basis, they hate his guts. That's why he's made sure that his team—the only people he's ever been happy with—don't know who he is behind the mask, with the small price attached that he doesn't know their identities, either. It's not like they know each other's, anyways, so it's not a big deal. But then they find out. The fact that Lloyd's elemental power makes him an empath doesn't help, either. Basically the premise of the movie pre-reveal with show elements and personalities, and Lloyd's Green Power is him being able to sense and be influenced by the emotions of those around him."

Okay so here's a fic without Morro! (that's cause it's in the movie-verse) Another type of fanfic I like reading is where Lloyd in tlnm keeps his identity secret from the other ninja and it ends up getting revealed (like this one.).

I've seen this fic being recommended more than once and it's one of the fics with the most kudos in the entire fandom on AO3! So 2000 others agree with me on how awesome this fic is!!!

"What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Stronger" by @crystaleclipse10 (CrystalEclipse on Archive of Our Own)

Original summary:

"Lloyd batted Red's hand away. “’m fine.” His head pounded, but at least it was quiet and dark. His hair tickled his nose. “What happened?” “We…didn’t get out in time,” Red whispered. “The missile exploded. We got everyone else out, though.” Lloyd relaxed and slumped forward as pure relief washed over him. They’d done it. They’d beaten Garmadon’s game. They’d freed the civilians and survived. Didn’t feel great, though. ~OR~ Lloyd and Kai get trapped under a building when it collapses, both injured. Angst and bonding ensue."

So it's another tlnm au fic! And this one has Kai And Lloyd bonding specific so I like it!!!

As I was reading this when it was still being updated I was very excited every time a new chapter would come out and my heart hurt for Lloyd each time! It IS worth the read! Just note that while tis fic is completed, the au is not.

"Officer Smith, Do You Copy?" by @hijabiwriter (same username on Archive of Our Own):

Original summary:

"Everyone has their reasons for becoming a police officer. Maybe they were forced. Maybe the profession stood out to them. Maybe they had some experience that prompted the idea of becoming a police officer. But that's only a few reasons. There are others, too. Like for instance, one of these officers is out for revenge."

This fic is entered around Nya, who's a police officer alongside Jay, Cole and Lloyd (for some reason Zane is not in this au/fic). Anyways her dark secrets are explored in every other chapter alongside the progressing story, and of course, an explanation is given to everything in the end.

On a personal note this is the fic where I left my first comment on my Ao3 account lol (the historic moment is on chapter 13!!!)

"Too Late to Say Goodbye" by @greenamethyst16 (same username on Archive of Our Own)

Original summary:

"Kai gets stabbed and Lloyd helps him... :D"

I think length-wise this is the shortest fic on the list but that doesn't make it bad!!! Basically Lloyd downplays his injuries and there are consequences... :D

"All the ways I say "I love you"" by @ninja-knox-ur-sox-off (Leonardo_Charles_BlueWood_21 on Archive of Our Own)

Original summary:

"Cole loves his team. They're his family and he does everything in his power to keep them safe and steady. He does his best to let them know he cares about them in every way but one.  Or  Seven times Cole couldn't quite say "I love you," and the one time he could."

Note: This story can only be read if you're logged in on AO3.

I like this fic because it encouraged me to remind my own irl friends how much they mean to me. In this story Cole believes that he's "the rock" of the team, and hence he doesn't show his emotions much. He's never told even one of them that he loves them and thinks that they deserve better than him. So stuff happens after that :D

Okay, I've read a lot more than this but this is all I'm gonna write about now cause I'm tired and I think this post has became too long. But if you wanna read more just check out the profiles of the writers! I haven't read everything myself but most of them have other good Ninjago fics to read!

If I've tagged you or mentioned your fic and you want it removed just let me know! I have no problem with removing it! :D

[pfhwrittes]

okay alright here we go. disclaimer here: i am not an expert on his dark materials. i am just a nerd that read the books at the age of 11 and fell in love with them. i have started to re-read them again as an adult but i can't find my copies of the subtle knife or the amber spyglass. things in this post will be wrong. i'm using the knowledge i have in my head. also, i'm going off the book lore, not the film (we do not speak of the film) or tv show lore.

also, there are spoilers under the cut for his dark materials.

so, for those of you that are unfamiliar with Philip Pullman's His Dark Materials trilogy, daemons are a sentient animal companion that is a reflection of your soul/personality that appears when you are born. they can talk, have independent thoughts, express emotions, feel pain, and also have a telepathic link with their human counterparts.

pre-pubescent children's daemons can change shape/type at will. at the onset of puberty (or, it's heavily implied that trauma is a factor too) the daemon will "settle" into its adult/mature form and can no longer change shape.

in his dark materials lyra's daemon, pantalaimon, is shown to change forms multiple times during her childhood/adventures before "settling" into the form of a pine marten. pan commonly changes forms to represent a mouse, a small bird (a sparrow i think?), a dolphin when she was travelling via sea voyage, and the book referenced that pan turned into a dragon when playing with other children and their daemons too. daemons can and do express a preference for certain forms throughout childhood.

according to the books (please note the first was published in the 90s), daemons are most commonly the "opposite sex" to their human counterparts. so males would have a female daemon and vice versa, but it was noted in the books that an unnamed character was considered an oddity because his daemon was the same sex as him. so it's not unheard of, just uncommon (or at least, uncommon according to the author - but i digress. i'm not getting into gender stuff on this post. i'm trans. i have Other Thoughts regarding gender stuff and daemons but i'm trying to keep this as short as possible.)

important stuff to know about daemons that could be considered spoilers if you haven't read the books/watched the TV show (sidenote: do not watch the 2008 film. it's bad. it's so so bad.)

social etiquette is that humans do not touch another human's daemon. it's an exceptionally intimate act, usually reserved for familial/romantic relationships or incredibly close friendships.

daemons are usually named by the parent/guardian's daemons.

daemons can and do talk to each other, groom each other, play, cuddle, and otherwise interact with each other. it's not uncommon for children's daemons to get into scuffles with each other.

if you are hurt, your daemon will feel it. if your daemon is hurt, you will feel it. if someone else touches your daemon, you will feel it. (in the books it's described as a kind of paralysing, anxiety inducing sensation if someone with hostile intent touches your daemon.)

if the human dies, the daemon turns into Dust (they turn into a shower of gold sparks and float away). if a daemon turns into Dust before the human does the human may not necessarily die...

there is a finite distance with how far a daemon can travel away from their human. some types of daemons (birds, dolphins) can travel further than terrestrial daemons but that is entirely dependent on the size/motility of the daemon AND on whether or not the pairing have been Separated.

being Separated hurts. it's agonising. it's not something that most people or daemons would willingly choose to do but there are exceptions...

people are very much stereotyped on their type of daemon. for example, in his dark materials soldiers usually have canine-type daemons. "common" folk usually have "common" types of daemons but more wealthy/better educated/higher social classes have "uncommon" daemons. in his dark materials lord asriel's daemon is a snow leopard called stelmaria, marisa coulter's (a wealthy socialite) daemon is a golden monkey (unnamed in the books, but according to the tv show and radio adaptation is named ozymandias) compared to various staff members at jordan college who all have daemons like house sparrows or small dogs or cats.... make of that what you will.

so yeah, consider this a primer on daemons as inspired by his dark materials. hopefully i will be able to weave this lore (and some of my own headcanons) into the au i'm noodling away on for the 141!

[accirax]

initial thoughts on DCAS episode 13

i guess Marcus cares about everyone. Marcus characterization jumpscare.

it's so interesting to me how much Alec seems to care about his family in retrospect when we've seen illustrated time and time again that he didn't seem to care about them (or at least his son) in the moment pretty much at all. i guess it's a "you don't know what you have until it's gone" type of thing?

hey, we finally got names!

well, that happened. once again, congrats to the AleRiya shippers. i probably still prefer them as friends for now, but i'm not opposed to them becoming a ship in the future. i doubt they will, since the writers seem to really like Connor and Riya and probably want that to be endgame, but i digress. it's really important to Alec's character, i think, that he was one of the only completely new characters created for s1, and was quite possibly crafted with an All Stars season in mind. thus, as much as Alec was created for Fiore in s1 (to help her have numbers and allies and stuff), he may have also been created for Riya in DCAS. i wouldn't be surprised if a lot of Alec's traits were crafted with this friendship and possibly even this plot beat in mind.

this whole scene is so sad :(

i... really don't understand Aiden's motivations here? like, what will happen if you tell the group "Alec and Riya kissed"? who would care other than Connor, who you already acknowledged would be crushed by the news? do you really think that Gabby or whoever would stop working with the villains under the knowledge that two legal adults smooched? is this about ruining Riya's reputation? the footage will certainly air on TV regardless of whether you tell anyone or not. am i just missing something? what game is Aiden playing at???

here's how aro Kristal truthers can still win.

waterBENDING? does Grett watch Avatar? :D i suppose she is in a good age demographic for it.

QUIRK??? DOES ALEC WATCH BNHA????? that's way more surprising than Grett watching Avatar. i do not know what Alec would possibly enjoy in BNHA. like, who's his favorite character? Aizawa???

this is WAY funnier than him being invisible. props.

Alec may have the looks of a mastermind strategist, but he has the heart of a simp. truly tragic. you know, if you want a family again, you could always direct that (platonic) love at a certain other competitor...

what a fucking loser (affectionate)

"have you considered that your employees might think you're cringe?"

LMAOOOOOOO this says so much about Jake. of course he's a villain shipper. but, see, to my point-- Jake literally doesn't give a fuck about this! what are you planning to gain!!!

Jake get the banana

potassium

ALEC FUCKING DIES?????? AIDEN KILLED A MAN??????????

i didn't put it together after watching the trailer, but it's really interesting to me that Yul and Grett were lightning and water respectively. i guess it's saying that if they could actually work together, they'd be a super deadly pair? or, maybe it was a coincidence.

nobody is wearing a cape, Gabby included. i thought she said she was working on her mask and cape designs :(

it's... a massive geological structure that weighs and should be able to withstand several tons of force? what?

TURN INTO A BIRD.

cathartic and appropriate that Yul becomes desperate once he feels his power is lost.

this was a real L episode for Alec. sorry buddy.

neither disappointed nor surprised. it truly was Yul's time to go.

THE TWINK TRUCE!! they're even making, like, the same face, lol.

GOTTEM

SO interesting how closely this mirror's Grett's exit in S1. Grett grew from her experience, while Yul can only manage to POSSIBLY be at the emotional maturity of s1 Grett now. and, tbh, he's not even close to that.

HOORAY!!! now make sure you apologize to her. thoroughly.

HOW?????????? i seriously don't understand this... maybe Aiden will explain himself better when this happens next episode.

yay, fun superhero challenge! love a good themed episode. i do think the fact that like... five people could have had immunity in this one was kind of weird, but, eh. as it turns out, Grett and Gabby could have won immunity as well as Aiden and Jake and it would have changed literally nothing about the outcome of this vote. it was really just about Yul (and kind of Connor, i guess).

i do wonder if Yul's elimination will essentially spell the end of the "heroes versus villains" portion of the game, and the gameplay will shift to being more individually focused. we do kinda have four groups of two at the moment-- Gabby and Grett, Alec and Riya, Aiden and Jake, and... Connor and Ally, I guess? that could make for some interesting votes.

after a somewhat longer hiatus than usual, now we're going to be doing one episode per week! how exciting! in that case, i'll see you again on (presumably) Wednesday for the power rankings, and if you don't read those, once again on Saturday for Episode 14. bye for now!

[three-fulm-thaumaturd]

Dawn? Trailed.

Finished Dawntrail MSQ tonight. Assorted scattershot (and spoiler-heavy) thoughts under the RM.

-I came to DT without much preexisting hype or emotional investment. All I wanted out of this expansion was to have a break from being the main character who has to save the multiverse from extinction, again, and to have some cool scenery to look at and some banger music, and we sure got that!

-There are a lot of things about how this expansion was written that didn't effortlessly or instinctively emotionally appeal to me in specific, but that are, when I think about them, really good, solid workmanlike choices re: how to construct a video game narrative.

-I know J-media tournament arcs are “well worn” in the same sense that the Grand Canyon or the Marianas Trench are, but they provide a plausible pretext for the things that MMOs are set up to do. Better than a host of supposedly highly-realized and virtuous precursor beings insisting that we repeatedly justify our existence by fighting, for sure.

-Being Wuk Lamat's mentor/emotional support Eorzean/800 pound gorilla was an interesting conceit. I think the writers carried off "non-protagonist PC" fairly well, and I've played other games where that was tried and didn't work (lookin at you SWtOR, re: KotFE). Lamat'yi feels like a more competently-written version of Stormblood-era Lyse. She's got both a core personality that remains consistent and a trajectory of increasing competence and maturity. I think she's well constructed as a protag/viewpoint character: she's primed to like things and people, her ethos of addressing conflict by seeking understanding and consensus is a good pretext to deliver exposition, and she feels/empathizes intensely but doesn't get stuck on her own emotional reactions. I wouldn’t say I effortlessly enjoy her as a character, especially early on when the writing leans hard into her immaturity and desperation to be liked and to prove herself, but I understand and respect what that’s for. It’s no different than Naruto or early-OT Luke Skywalker.

-I like the variety of Central/South American cultural inspo (Aztec, Quechua, Yucatec Maya, Pueblo, etc), we got in the setting and culture for this xpac, and the conception of Tural as a very racially/culturally heterogeneous place where power comes from the aggregate of a complicated network of relationships that have to be negotiated on an ongoing basis. It's not zero-sum, and finding solutions that benefit everyone is hard but worthwhile.

-I was excited to be able to bring Krile, my favorite Scion, along this time. I feel like the ShB/EW A-team had enough presence to appeal to people who like them and not so much that they upstaged the new characters or the change of scenery.

-I think there was effort to add cinematographic interest to the many, dense cutscenes other than wide-angle shot/reverse-shot over paragraphs of text. Some of the camera angles (switching between the faces of my minimum-height lalafell and 2m+ Wuk Lamat) and long shots of characters' expressions resulted in...sometimes-intentional uncanniness and unintentional comedy. This probably was not the devs' intention (their intention was probably a performance with emotional subtlety that the graphics overhaul alas still doesn't permit), but my instinctive read was that it felt like unnecessary padding/stalling for time.

-Re: other stuff that felt like it unnecessarily lengthened the playtime and the amount of text to read, sometimes I resent that it feels like I'm being not just spoon-fed, but bottle-fed plot and character beats that are not complicated or hard to understand. Then I see people evincing failure to comprehend what they're reading elsewhere on the internet and understand why it's done that way. :\

-There's basically one trademark Ishikawa conflict: Local man driven to extremes by inability/unwillingness to come to terms with loss, aging, and death. There's also one trademark Ishikawa sin that characterizes all of the ShB-and-after antagonists: a delusional insistence on harming the living to feed the dead. Those come up so consistently that her style is instantly recognizable...and I wonder some about what she's experienced or how she's doing.

-The hairpin turn in the plot about 2/3 of the way in and the by-now very familiar tropes aren't my narrative jam at all, but it was engaging enough to mostly keep my attention until the end. I'm beyond weary of Ascians/Ancients and shard math, so I'm glad those things were referenced (and there's some interesting stuff to chew on re: Lalafell history in particular) but not focal.

-I'm a little mad, because my pre-Heritage-Found speculation that El Dorado was going to turn out to actually be an aetherologic Superfund site (which would explain the security, the giants charging in and coming back dead, sick, or unable to reproduce, the teratogenic effects on eg Blessed Siblings etc and the fight for control of it as a putative military asset) seemed to have a lot of fun possibilities. I guess you could argue that Living Memory might be a very abstracted nod in that direction.

-*Queen Sphene*? Really, you couldn’t have named her anything at all else???

-I'm not at all satisfied that "he felt overshadowed by his father's accomplishments and wanted to prove his worth independent of his unusual heritage" is sufficient justification for how Zoraal Ja was, especially prior to his first contact with Alexandria. I figured based on his behavior and Krile's remarks, that he had to be Tempered, or affected by an equivalent kind of magical compulsion.

-The final trial, and to a lesser extent the last dungeon are an unmitigated (and unmitigatable until mods become available again) accessibility nightmare if you're photosensitive or prone to motion sickness. I hoped the devs would take the feedback they got from the ShB alliance raid series under consideration but they sure didn't give a shit. Guess I'm not doing roulettes for a while.

[uptoolateart]

Thanks to @hailqiqi for tagging me about ten thousand years ago. I just have so much to do 😩 Anyway! The original post said:

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers (except me because obvs I have done it). Spread the self-love ❤

Here we go!

Breaking Free - the whole series

I'm cheating here, because I'm listing a multi-book series, but I can't help it. I'm super proud of it. It started as a one-shot of Adrien and Marinette finding Gabriel's basement, and then it spiralled hard. It begins right after Strike Back. From there, it's a complicated, twisted and very bumpy ride.

'How did you think this up?' my BF beta has asked me many times. I don't know, guys. It just seemed obvious at the time 😆

This was my 'getting back into writing' book, after a lengthy creative hiatus / identity crisis. I churned out chapters because I needed to get back in the game and rediscover myself artistically. Then I went back and edited the whole thing a couple years later, to make it better (and expand it by about 20k words).

It became a series because I had requests for sequel scenes. Again, a couple one-shot ideas spiralled, and I merged them with another premise that had been kicking around in my head - Adrien, years later, trying to heal from everything as an adult and find himself as a father with his own teenage son.

That then spiralled again, and I ended up exploring Felix in depth, too, and pushing all the sentibeing stuff to extremes. The whole concept for Book 4 intimidated the hell out of me as soon as I thought of it. I was so worried I wouldn't be able to do it justice. Writing it was sometimes physical torture. But in the end, I think Book 4 contains what might be the best chapter I've ever written for anything in my life.

Still, the saga continues! Book 5 starts posting in 4 weeks. I've set myself another crazy challenge with that one, but I am determined to pull it off. I also have ideas for a few one-shots to collect in a volume I'm calling Book 6. The series is going to be like 700k words by the time I'm done. Maybe more. Will I ever truly finish this thing? I don't know. I fell so hard into the universe I created, and it's going to be hard to let it go. I fully expect to cry when I post the epilogue to Book 5.

Book 1 was also how I really got into this fandom and started making friends. Honestly, that book changed my life. Yeah...I'm gonna cry.

Dreaming Wide Awake

This was my follow-up to the S5 finale. The show is now going its own way, but I'm still so proud of how all the tension and emotions turned out in this fic. Again, the story is complex. It's also really surreal, and I think the battle scenes are some of my best. I was soooo nervous about the reader response to one of the big moments in it, but the unanimous reaction was everything I'd hoped for.

How the Heart Learns to Beat Again

A backstory from Nathalie's POV. It starts with her at age 25, as the sole survivor of an old magical order, going on extraordinary adventures seeking legendary artefacts. Then she meets the Agrestes, loses her magic, and gets roped into a new crazy world.

The story also explores Gabriel and Emilie, Colt and Amelie, and Adrien and Felix's creation / infancy. Book 2 (covering Emilie's death and how Gabriel and Nathalie start using the butterfly and peacock) starts posting on Monday. I think these fics are possibly the most mature writing I've ever done. There's a certain 'voice' to them that stands out from my other writing.

Finding a Way (Jurassic Park AU)

This is my most successful fic, so far. It's half goofy / romantic and half tense / action - with a lot of gore. I thought it would be total crack, but it took on a life of its own and became much more serious. There was something magical about how it all came together. I'm planning a sequel, but I need to get through a few other big fics first.

Voyage! Tales of the USS Miraculous (Star Trek Crossover)

This is so far from finished, but I'm having a blast writing it. It's basically all planned out and going to be mammoth when it's done. There's a little of everything in it, and you don't need to know Star Trek to understand it. I'm loving the reader speculations over what might be going on.

Okay! That's my list. Tagging @raspberrycatapult @kuromori4 @cardiac-agreste @mysticraven20 @trinketsinthesun @hamsteriffic @jigglypuff1994 @fandomofone

[zvtara-was-never-canon]

what is your second most favorite otp from any series?

AAAAAAHHHHH, DON'T DO THIS TO ME! There are some many pairings I love in so many books, movies, series, soap-operas, etc.

*sighs* Okay, gun to my head, there's three, in no particular order that I absolutely ADORE, have made me cry, and that I legitimately don't understand how anyone could watch these shows and not ship them (spoilers for Friends, How I Met Your Mother and The Borgias, respectively)

Monica and Chandler

Because I was just 4-years-old when Friends final season was aired, I already knew these two were going to be endgame when I watched the show - and it didn't take long for me to see the appeal, even when they were still supposed to be just friends.

They're just so affectionate with each other right from the start, cuddling on the couch, helping each other out - and Chandler just casually says stuff like "If neither of us is married when we're fourty, I'm totally willing to marry and have a kid with you just so you get the family you want" and actively tries PROVE to her he is boyfriend material and they make a game out of it??????? Genius. Perfect. Amazing.

And then it happens, they hook up and right away they're couple goals. Can't keep their hands off each other, are super clingy, all of their friends find them ridiculously adorable, Chandler matures A LOT and Monica is very patient with him because she knows he's used to hiding any emotional turmoil behind a sarcastic joke, and they can joke about and tease each other without either of them being too mean or too sensitive.

Also their conflicts never last more than one or two episodes and they never break up after first getting together, and it was a breath of fresh air coming from the same show that gave us Ross and Rachel.

Barney and Robin

They have INSANE chemistry, Robin was the only woman Barney was truly willing to change for, and Barney was the one guy Robin was with that ever truly liked her for who she was.

They. Deserved. So. Much. Better.

Seriously, I can't get over how unfair their ending was. There's a reason I tell Zutarians to give this show a watch before they complain about how their ship, that was never even canon, was "robbed of it's happy ending."

We see Barney and Robin being teased as potentially having at least a fling someday as early as season 1, they finally hook up in season 3, season 4 is all about him struggling with being in love with her, seasons 5-7 are all about them dating then breaking up while still being very much in love yet never properly reconciliating because life gets in the way, season 8 is them getting engaged and being adorably happy together, the 9th and final season is THE WEEKEND OF THEIR WEDDING and them working through every last issue they still have to make sure they will a long, happy life together as a married couple...

Then the finale goes and says "Actually, they divorced off-screen because their hotel room had no wi-fi. Sorry." WHO THE FUCK DOES THAT? It's really no wonder the network cancelled the planned spin-off right after the finale aired.

Cesare and Lucrezia

Ah yes, a Nichya list of great ships includes a pair of siblings, specifically Older Brother X Young Sister, who would have thought? This time a kind of, sort of historical one! (Seriously, The Borgias is the kind of over-dramatic, historically inaccurate period piece I love wasting my time with, and the aesthetic is incredible).

Even as someone who is very into that kind of dynamic and that knew the show was gonna go there, I was still SHOCKED at how unsubtle is right from the start - especially once I found out the writer didn't want to play up the sexual tension originally.

Somehow, the first time we see these two on screen, Lucrezia is spying on her brother as he has sex and once he notices he playfully chases her around the garden, berating her for spying on him AGAIN, and then when they're on the ground together he just casually admits to loving her more than he loves God????????????????????????????? NORMAL SIBLING BEHAVIOR, EVERYBODY! NOTHING WEIRD GOING ON HERE!

I adore how protective (and possessive) Cesare is of her, ready to commit murder at the very thought of a man mistreating her - yet he is still willing to step aside when he thinks she found a good man, because nothing matters to him more than Lucrezia's happiness, not even his own. It just so happens that he always has to step in again because nobody loves her quite to insane degree he does, and thus she only feels truly safe, happy and loved with him, hence her saying "Only a Borgia can truly love a Borgia."

And they, legitimately, are insepareble. They're always close to each other, holding hands, hugging, cuddling, KISSING - all long before they're ready to admit, even to themselves that they're in love.

They are so clueless about what level of physical affection is normal between relatives that they made out in front of her husband and were surprised he found out about their incestuous affair.

And more importantly, thanks to the show being cancelled after season 3 instead of getting the planned fourth season, they never broke up! The show literally ends with them in each other's arms, accepting their love. I couldn't have asked for literally anything else.

[kurov1864]

Opinions on Milgram characters

I've actually been wanting to do this for some time now lmao. Btw this is just my interpretation of each character, followed by my opinion on said interpretation. Feel free to disagree, I love to discuss with other people. (also cross-posted on Reddit)

Haruka: Okay so what I think happened for him is that he very obviously has a developmental disorder of some sort. I'm not sure exactly what, and I don't really wanna speculate because I'm not an expert. So he, as a child, was neglected by his mom and didn't receive enough attention. This led him to become extremely attached to his childhood best friend, which didn't really affect anything when they were both children. But then, she grew up, yet he didn't. She started to act more maturely, and he didn't. They grew apart, and Haruka couldn't understand why. Or maybe he did, and blamed himself. Anyways. Yada yada, he tried getting attention from his mom by killing animals, he did get attention (the wrong kind), kinda went off and killed his ex bestie as well, either out of frustration or for literally more attention.

Now, my general opinion of him? Neutral. I don't love or hate him. Maybe a very mild dislike, but that's only because I find it kinda disturbing how he calls Muu his mom.

Yuno: Abortion. I like Yuno. Not because of the whole "omg girlboss slayyyy you have total control over your body yas queen" thing, because honestly yall have got to stop saying stuff like that. I like her because she wants to be recognized as a "mature adult" who can actually take responsibility for her actions, instead of being degraded into this poor innocent girl who knows what the shit is. She's so impartial to everyone, even herself, yet she knows and acknowledges the fact that she's still human who has emotions and empathy, which is why she sometimes tries to help out. Yet, she doesn't deny the fact that she seeks interesting and new things, leaving behind others when most would feel guilty. 10/10, relatable character.

Fuuta: HATE. He is so... thoughtless?? I absolutely hate people who gets so caught up in their cause that they literally cannot see anything else. They don't stop to think, "oh, maybe what I'm doing is wrong? Maybe there is a better way to go about this?". Now, to be fair, I don't know much about Fuuta. So please, feel free to disagree with me about him, but I cannot stand the way he didn't stop to think that maybe cancelling others would push them to suicide. That just shows his naivety. I acknowledge that his passion is admirable (passion for what I'm still thinking about), but passion without the knowledge to help is just being a stubborn idiot. His impulsiveness is also another very strong ick of mine.

Muu: I don't have much of an opinion on her character, but I do enjoy the concept that she represents. My personal theory is that she represents how somebody can be both a victim and a bully at the same time. She is at her very core, human, but without all those polite manners and social skills drilled into her. She turns pitiful and desperate when disadvantaged, but turns cocky, arrogant and confident when she has power. She is so, undeniably, human. And yet she can also be kind at times. She has such a f-ked up perception of everything, so maybe yall didn't catch it, but she's still trying to be nice in her own warped way.

Shidou: Eh. He's like, okay?? Not gonna comment on his crime because I don't feel anything towards it. But his attitude is sort of annoying. The way that he clings to his role as a doctor in prison after trying to forsake his life, the way he keeps trying to bring up age with Es (yes I know age is a valid point but bringing that up just makes it seem as if you're looking down on Es only because of their age. it's degrading), all that stuff just kinda gets on my nerves a bit. I appreciate what he's doing for the prison,,, but I don't really like him.

Mahiru: Love her. I love the way she tries to stand up for her ideals, no matter how much society + Es tells her it's wrong. She's been hurt so much yet she's still so optimistic, bright and hopeful about love. I love her. Granted, it may be because I also have fucked up views of love like her which is why I gave her such a high rating compared to like, Fuuta.

Kazui: Neutral. I would have wanted to scream at him about just,,, not telling lies, but I can acknowledge how hard it is for some people to not care about their image, especially if they grew up in a traditional household.

Amane: A bit positive and negative at the same time. I dunno, I just kinda like the way that she found a way to adapt to her horrible circumstances. Although that way is by weaponizing her religion to protect herself, but yeah. Unhealthy circumstances calls for unhealthy coping methods. What I dislike is how she doesn't even want to give other thoughts a try. Like she won't stop and think about other options, not even for a little bit. But then again, it's literally been drilled into her since childhood to not betray that religion, so I guess that makes my point invalid.

Mikoto: Why, why is he so popular?? What?? I'm so confused. Honestly I just think he's neutral. Just like, oh look, another victim of the toxic work environment who found a terrible way to cope. I don't have any feelings about John either, although I do admire his dedication to Mikoto. He's just so,,, uninteresting?? Someone please tell me why he is so popular, because I gen want to try to understand and see his appeal.

Kotoko: My wife. I'll try not to let bias get in the way of this one.

Okay I'm gonna be so fr rn I absolutely detested her at first. She's like Fuuta,,, but so much worse. She takes her ideals to the absolute extreme, pushes down all guilts and feelings about others to carry out her "justice". She's so unwilling to admit that she likes the feeling of beating bad guys up, the moral high ground it gives her. She's not only hurting other people, but also herself. Mf thinks she's in an edgy movie where she's the anti-hero who goes against the government and is constantly misunderstood, like girlie stop. Stop and THINK about what you are doing, see the death, destruction and harm you've brought about not just to others but also yourself?? Goddamn.

I'm not even sure why I like her LMFAO. All my opinions about her is just, she's human scum who needs lots of therapy to stop hurting herself and others.

Es: Love my non-binary guard. They care so much for the prisoners, trying their absolute best to understand them while coping with their body and mind being infiltrated by us. I always feel so guilty having them bear the burden of explaining the guilty decisions to the prisoners,,, just want em to be happy and work-free. I admire their dedication to truly, truly feel for the prisoners, try to understand the entire context instead of the one on the surface. Yeah, they act immaturely, they're a 15 year old who has no memories, no clue as to where they are, clinging onto their role as a warden even if it makes them look pathetic because that's the only thing they've ever known. It's their only sense of "identity" they have that gives them power and pride.

Jackalope: HATE HATE HATE HATE GO BACK TO YOUR ROOM I DON'T WANT TO SEE YOU IN TRIAL 2 END gOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO BACK TO WHICHEVER MISERABLE BASEMENT YOU CRAWLED OUT FROM AND STAY IN THERE FOR THE REST OF ETERNITY. JACKALOPE IS A FATHER AND CARES FOR ES?? I CALL BS. HE DUMPED SO MUCH WORK ON ES, ACTS SHIFTY AND MANIPULATIVE ALL THE TIME, DOESN'T EXPLAIN ANYTHING TO ES, AND YOU EXPECT ME TO LIKE HIM?????

[raayllum]

it’s high key really annoying the attention toh gets on this website while no one acknowledges tdp exists

Yeah, sometimes I wish TDP got more recognition and appreciation in a fandom space for its storytelling (the parallels, the worldbuilding, the mature theme explorations) simply because we haven't had a western kids' show go this hard since TLOK (even if I think Korra stumbles in a lot of ways) and arguably ATLA in its explorations of war and morality, two things that TDP is obsessed with, as well as a sometimes overwhelming discussion of Grief.

However, to be frank, while many teen and adult fans of kids cartoons say that they want darker themes and storylines, what that usually means, I think, is more akin to something like TOH or She Ra, in which you know 1) your favourite characters will always typically survive with maybe one or two minor parental or villainous exceptions, and 2) one or two characters in an otherwise fairly cookie cutter 'good guy' cast will have a redemption arc or be quirky morally dubious in a way that's played for comedy, and there will be a handful of significantly "Oh Shit!" darker or creepier moments. The characters are mostly teenagers, the heavier plot stuff is regulated to a few standout episodes, with most of the other conflicts being things like figuring out how to make friends or struggling with not fitting in or deciding what you want to do with your life. And those are all good explorations, and it's not as though TDP doesn't touch on some of that (Callum is finding his place in the world, Rayla is 'changing careers', Ez struggles with his new responsibilities and not fitting in, Soren - like Hunter - leaves an emotionally abusive relationship with a parental figure).

But I think it's TDP's attachment of all of those things to morality that makes the emotional stakes higher and less comforting and/or comfortable for people who are, likely, going to fiction for escapism rather than exploration. (To be clear: one is not better than the other, I just know what my personal preferences are.) Rayla's 'career/schooling' change is whether she's going to kill people for a living; Callum deciding what sort of mage he's going to be is rooted in deciding how much he's willing to either slowly destroy himself or take on the impossible, both with some dire consequences; Ezran not fitting is is also tied to having mysterious, unknown magical powers the story still hasn't fully explained the root cause of. Yes, the three main kids are typically good people who want to do the right thing, but that's much easier said than done (Ezran burning the monster soldiers, Callum's ruthlessness, Rayla's self sacrificial tendencies manifesting in destructive ways). TDP is never going to have an episode of "I lied to my friends because I wanted them to think I was cool or not a nerd" or "I'm scared of them preferring someone else over me" or "I need to learn how to be a good friend" (hi TOH with like 5 episodes and She Ra).

Like Rayla lies to the boys, but that's because she isn't sure how to tell them that her father murdered theirs and made them orphans, and she's worried it will accordingly be a wedge between them.

Like, there's hardly any episodes of TDP that don't talk about grief or death or both in some manner. The show consistently explores unreliable narrators across all sides of its ethical spectrum(s). S4 has a subplot regarding religious traditions and the ethics of the death penalty. Most of Arc 1 and now into Arc 2 sees good people with good intentions or understandable motivations doing pretty terrible things to either themselves, the people around them, or both. The death and body horror imagery aren't one offs, but consistent series defining elements that are always treated seriously. Villains aren't people who don't love their families (or anyone) and good guys aren't good because they're good friends to one another. It's more complicated than that, from the body swap and discussions of the soul in S1, to the cycle of violence laid out explicitly in S2, to explorations of punishment and exile in S3.

Overall, I'm fine with the success and appreciation that TDP gets; some of my students watch it, actually, which makes it useful in some of our lesson discussions. Because TDP is a good show for kids, yes, but it certainly never pulls its punches in forcing all of its ensemble cast through the wringer.

TLDR; due to age demographics and tonal differences, particularly in character conflicts, themes, and amount of Lore, I'm not surprised at all that TDP is pretty underrated on tumblr. Again, doesn't mean these elements of 'maturity' make it Better (although I do think it's written more cohesively than She Ra and more consistently than TOH in its set up and payoff), I just know where my (and many other's) preferences lay accordingly, and am not surprised at the split.

[itsasilentreader]

Itsasilentreader favourites

Hi all! I can imagine what you are thinking; who is she? I understand, I don't have a lot of followers on here or even mutuals. But since I have read a lot (and I mean a LOT) of Eddie Munson fics, I want to share my favourites of this moment.

Even if I can influence one person with this post, I would be happy. Where to begin, where to begin? I have so many that I absolutely love but I will share some in this post, in no particular order.

DISCLAIMER! This contains 18+, NSFW themes > minors DNI! Also, this is going to be a long read. Enjoy!

Note: I love every single blog on here, especially the ones that I follow. There are a lot of people who are so talented and have a writing gift (please share your talents with me) and I don't want to exclude anyone. If people like this, I will continue creating posts of my favourite fics and recommendations (of that time).

Dividers by @firefly-graphics & @silkholland

1. Title: Twenty-Four Hours

Writer: @ghost-proofbaby

Summary: In which Eddie Munson and you absolutely hate each other's guts. What happens when your friends make a bet that you can't spend more than twenty-four hours consecutively together?

CW: NSFW eventual smut > minors DNI! Strong languages.

Pairing: Modern!college!Eddie Munson x fem!college!reader

Tropes: Enemies to lovers, forced proximity, slow burn

My notes: This series has two of my favourite tropes: enemies to lovers and forced proximity. It is so well written and so much fun to read. Also, starting off with a bet?! One of my favourite things and takes me back to those 90s/00s rom-com vibes.

There is a story behind what happened with Eddie and the reader before, and it is so well-written that it keeps you on your toes while catching a glimpse from time to time of what happened that night they met. I can't wait to discover what happened and why they are the way they are right now.

I just can't get enough of this series and it is so good. It has enough banter, angst and humour. There is one scene in this series where the reader goes through Eddie's.. stuff, that got me giggling and almost cackling while trying to imagine Eddie's reaction. If you wanna find out which scene I'm talking about, you should read this series!

If you like these tropes, this one is for you!

2. Title: To know you're mine

Writer: @blue-mossbird

Summary: Where you and Steve swing with Eddie and Chrissy, and it gets complicated.

CW: for obvious reasons, NSFW > has a lot of smut. Minors DNI! body insecurity, swingers, group sex, dirty talk, emotional hurt/comfort, cheating, angst with a happy ending.

Pairing: Modern!au, Eddie Munson x Chrissy Cunningham x Steve Harrington x you, fem!reader, chubby!reader

My notes: Okay to be completely honest, I had my doubts when I came across this fic and before I started reading it. I am not that keen on the tags swinging and cheating in fics (with main characters). Most of the time, it is just not my cup of tea. But man oh man, when I read this, my doubts were gone, GONE I tell ya.

This is one of the best and most well-written pieces of art I have ever read. It is, obviously, a dirty and fun story. But the aspect of confronting changing feelings for another is written in such a mature way, it really sucked (pun not intended) me into this story.

Also, as someone who is not as skinny but not as chubby, it did make me feel better about myself while reading a reader that has the same insecurities as I have, and actually seeing it written in a story like this makes me feel validated.

If you like romance, angst and a LOT of smut? This one is for you!

3. Title: The "Yes" Policy

Writer: @pinkrelish

Summary: After a lifetime of questionable decisions, you moved from the big city to the sleepy town of Hawkins with your best friend, and took the first job you saw: answering phones for the most boring auto shop in the dullest place on Earth. It wasn't exactly the adventure you wanted it to be... but attempting to win over the jaded mechanic who insisted on ignoring your existence proved entertaining.

CW: It is NSFW since there will be eventual smut. You know the drill > minors DNI! angst, drug/alcohol mention/use, depictions of poverty

Pairing: singledad!mechanic!Eddie x fem!reader.

Tropes: A delicious written slow burn

My notes: Honestly, I cannot get enough of this one. This is my all-time favourite at this moment. The way this is written will make you giggle and blush like a high schooler. I don't think I can put into words how much I love this series.

Every chapter is a long read and every word got me hooked. Anticipating what is coming next. Every word, every action and every thought is so well written that I sometimes forget it is fiction and they don’t exist.

Also, Eddie Munson as a girl dad? Sign me up! The relationship between them, and his daughter with the reader is so adorable it makes my heart hurt. (I just wanted a happy ending for him).

It is also set a little bit later than season 4, it does look back on certain aspects of that season, but you just have to read this to find out!

If you love slow burns and strangers to lovers, this is it for you!

4. Title: Honey, I'm home

Writer: @trashmouth-richie

Summary: You were desperate for a roommate after Nancy got married and moved out. An ad in the paper goes unanswered until someone comes knocking on the door.

CW: NSFW, eventual smut > minors DNI! crude behaviour, Eddie is a fucking menace

Pairing: Eddie Munson x fem!reader

Tropes: enemies to lovers

My notes: Okay so enemies to lovers is my favourite trope, and yes I have issues but that's what therapy is for.

I don't know why everyone is writing enemies to lovers!roommate Eddie at this moment but please never stop. I love you. This series has three parts (as of creating this post) and the relationship between these two is so funny but also like, more realistic of some sort? Eddie is a fucking menace indeed but the reader is so stubborn as hell and does not let Eddie walk over her.

The way Eddie is written here made me cackle so hard because this is what I can imagine being roomies with him is like, to be really fucking honest. Anyways, I can't wait to see how this series goes and how the relationship between Eddie and the reader will shift to something more.

If you like enemies to lovers and menace Eddie, this one is for you!

5. Title: Bad Idea

Writer: @lunarzstarz

Summary: Not wanting to leave for college with your virginity still intact. you turn to the last resort that you know can only end terribly...

CW: NSFW > minors DNI! drugs, first times, oral (F receiving), fingering, unprotected sex, nicknames (princess/sweetheart), Eddie being a goof but also an asshole

Pairing: fuckboy!Eddie Munson x Virgin!fem!reader

My notes: okay listen up, this was so good. Normally, I stay clear of fuckboy!Eddie because I can't handle angst and there is, of course, always angst involved with him.

But this one? My god, I want him. Currently, as I am writing this, Shameless by Camilla Cabello came on and it is so fitting even though I do not know what is coming next. This was a delicious read and I can't wait to find out how Eddie will get his head out of his ass. I'm hoping the reader will have this impact on him that he can't explain and drive him crazy. That's all.

No but in all seriousness, this is also a piece that is so well-written and I can't wait for part two and three!

If you are into fuckboy!Eddie, this one is for you!

6. Title: The customer's always right

Writer: @lovebugism

Summary: Eddie Munson is a virgin and doesn't want anyone to know (because being an adult who's never fucked anyone is a total reputation ruiner). But you, his favorite customer, are more than willing to change that.

CW: Also for obvious reasons, NSFW > minors DNI! Virginity loss, new relationship shenanigans, mentions of previous toxic relationships, angst with a happy ending, canon divergent

Pairing: Eddie Munson x fem!reader

Tropes: friends to lovers

My notes: Okay you can never go wrong with friends to lovers, right? This is a fun and spicy read, with finally a not-so-confident and experienced Eddie regarding sex.

Meanwhile, I am a total sucker (pun definitely intended) for a confident, know it all, sex-god type of Eddie (because who isn't?!), this is a refreshing read. It shows a different side of Eddie. There are probably more virgin!reader x eddie, than the other way around, but I love to read these types of fics.

It is cute and spicy and has the right amount of angst. Like I have mentioned before, I'm usually avoiding angst fics because my heart will ache so bad and I physically can't take it, this contains just the right amount.

If you are also into virgin!eddie, friends to lovers, this one is for you!

7. Title: I want you to want me

Writer: @upsidedownwithsteve

Summary: Basically you go to a summer camp as a camp counselor and meet Eddie. You have one personal rule: no boys.

CW: So fluffy, it is sickening. A few almost kisses. Billy does make an appearance so I think that should be considered a CW?

Pairing: Eddie Munson x fem!reader

Trope: strangers to friends to lovers I think

My notes: When I came across this fic, I was already hooked by the fact is like a camp counselor!Eddie AND the first part was already 33K words. (if you haven't noticed, I loved long chapters). It fits the whole vibe with Eddie.

This is just pure fluff, teeth-rotting fluff and I absolutely love it. This is one of the best camp counselor fics I have ever read and it is overall just amazing. There is a part two and baby blurbs available to read too! I read these two back to back and even though it was a long read, it is worth it.

If you like camp counselor Eddie like me, this one is for you!

8. Title: Is it my body, part of the Super Freak series

Writer: @punk-in-docs

Summary: The one where Eddie gives you a ride home after your friend ditched you at a terrible party.

CW: This particular part doesn't have any CWs in particular, just fluff and pining. Some parts are NSFW (minors DNI!) because it contains smut.

Pairing: Eddie Munson x fem!reader

My notes: I am currently rereading this series because this is just amazing. This particular part has my heart. The flirting, the pining, the fluff, it all makes my heart melt.

Overall this series is so much fun to read. It finally has a reader who is not particularly popular but also not a total outcast. It just kind of hangs in between, just like I was in high school. Maybe that is why I love this series. And his nickname for reader is fucking adorable. Please.

Also, the friend of the reader in this series reminds me of my ex-friend who has a similar personality. I don't know why I gave you this information.

With that being said, I'm going to reread this series again and blush at this part.

If you like fluff, goofy Eddie with some smut, this one is for you!

If you made it to the end, congrats! Thank you so much for taking the time to read through a few of my favourite fics at this moment. They are all talented writers and I absolutely love all of their work. If you decide to check these fics out, please also check out the rest of their work! This took way too long to write but I hope you enjoyed it!

Thank you all, have a great day/night <3