#she’ll probably come back properly timed

[sunlightfeeling]

if i make gifs from gift as my late smanniversary present, is that cheating? /j

[fortunxa]

Physical affection with Jinx

H E A D C A N O N S

╰┈➤ requested

Jinx x fem!reader

cw: mentions of nsfw, hallucinations

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆

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Jinx is such a touch-starved girl.

She doesn’t shy away from physical contact, but paradoxically, it can catch her off-guard if she’s not the one initiating it—blame it on her childhood.

As you get to know her, start off gently with some light taps that get her attention.

She’ll often nudge your shoulder, drag her nails across your arm or leg as you’re talking, doodle on your skin, or simply grab your hand as she’s excitedly leading you somewhere.

Jinx is just so curious as to how you’d react, testing the waters.

But once you gain her trust, her innocent touches turn into proper hugs. And I don’t mean duvet-like embraces that let you breathe, but cocoon ones where you can feel every ounce of her as she holds you tightly.

This is the moment you realize she’s now afraid of losing you.

Those hugs come unexpectedly, like a predator pouncing on its prey, and you often stumble from her sheer force.

She’s definitely a waist/torso hugger, and believe it or not, it’s not because of her height but because she genuinely feels safer that way.

Shoulder hugs are traps, so be prepared for a paint bomb to find itself attached to your back.

She will be impressed if you can throw her over your shoulder.

Loves piggyback rides.

Pinky promises. It’s a childish gesture but one that holds enormous significance to her. She would link her finger with yours with those wide, innocent eyes. No take-backs.

– “You know that’s legally binding, right?”

If you’re her first kiss—which, let’s be honest, you probably are—her Jinx persona is nowhere to be found. It’s Powder now, and she’s so cautious as she closes the distance.

Her lips ghost over yours so lightly it almost tickles, but you let her take her time as she grapples with the newfound closeness. You don’t rush her, and when she finally kisses you, it’s slow and tentative. She wants to feel and analyze everything.

– “Was that good?”

As she gains confidence, she starts experimenting with the mix of sensations.

She’s attentive to your reactions, and she soon finds all of your sweet spots.

Will randomly kiss you, and it doesn’t matter where or when.

Forehead kisses, kisses on your neck, earlobes, stomach, hips, thighs… You name it. She adores every single one of them.

She’s the type to swap a piece of candy or gum through a kiss.

Jinx is all about PDA. She wants everyone to know you’re hers.

Hickeys, hickeys, and more hickeys.

Unfortunately, when the wrong people figured out that you’re her partner, it did get you kidnapped once as a way to undermine Silco. Take Jinx’s favorite person away, and she becomes erratic, unfit to carry out his plans.

Heavy on ‘once’ because the hell she brought them was enough to terrify anyone else with the same strategy.

The number of explosions that day alerted Piltover itself.

Talking to Silco and/or Sevika? She’s holding your hand, slightly pushing you behind her in a protective manner. Neither of them approves of your relationship, they deem it a distraction.

Much to Silco’s dismay, she will drag you into most of their private meetings and fidgets with your fingers if she gets bored.

You’re ordering at the bar? She’s either behind you with her arms around your waist or next to you with her hand on your hip as she’s pulling you closer.

You’re on a mission together? There she is, fighting back-to-back with you so she knows you’re there, unharmed. If you’re separated, she can’t concentrate properly anymore, and she keeps seeking you out in between firing her gun. She’s prioritizing your safety over anything else, which has gotten her injured quite a few times.

She insists that she can patch up her wounds herself, but once you see that goddamn stapler approaching a gash, you’re frantically snatching it away from her hands.

You tend to her injuries in such a caring and gentle way that it brings tears to her eyes.

At first, you’re worried you went too deep with the needle as you were stitching her cuts.

– “What’s wrong? Did that hurt? I’m so sorry–”

– “No one has ever done that for me before.”

Whenever the roles are reversed, and you’re the injured one, she’s in a frenzy. She’s muttering to herself as she grabs the first aid kit.

Stern face and furrowed brows, but despite it all, she tries to be delicate—‘tries’ because the voices are making her movements jerky.

– “Are you crazy?! What were you thinking? No, no, she wasn’t thinking at all…”

She will absolutely kiss your wound better afterward.

Cuddle time on her couch after a long day.

She loves it when you sweep her off her feet and carry her bridal style to lay her down.

She likes to be the little spoon but face toward you because your scent and the sound of your heartbeat calm her down.

Occasionally, she’ll be the big spoon to switch it up and make you feel secure, too.

Your presence helps with her night terrors, and she sleeps more often with you around.

But you always wake up with her hair in your mouth, her elbow on your face, and covers on the ground, and she’s snoring—occasionally drooling—in a starfish position.

– “Where the fuck did your pillow go?”

Morning kisses!!!

Morning sex.

Showering and taking baths together.

Hygiene isn’t a big thing in Zaun (shocker), so when you have time to get clean, you do it together. Washing each other’s hair, trying to get all the grime—and occasionally blood—out.

It’s a tender moment that turns entertaining—or sexual—rather quickly.

You’re washing off, and you turn around to see Jinx with a bubble beard, her face completely stoic. She starts pretending to be a Piltovan man as you’re laughing.

Or she’ll come up behind you and press her soapy body to yours as her fingers dip inside you.

Physical affection while she’s working on a project can go two ways:

When she’s confident in her work: She loves having you close, whether it’s by having you sit on her lap and vice versa or grabbing your hands for an impromptu dance break when she’s feeling her playlist. She’s babbling about her ideas and designs, explaining each step as you play with her braids.

When she’s experimenting: Do not come close or she’ll scream. She’ll be too scared to have you near in case she messes up an equation and causes an explosion. She will actually make you go elsewhere as a precaution. But she’ll be more than happy to show you her progress after!

You love painting each other’s nails, but she often chips hers.

She straddles you as she does your makeup and vice versa.

Will use her own saliva to clean up any messes.

Jinx absolutely adores trying out new looks on you, and she treats you like her human canvas.

Not only with makeup but with markers and paint, too.

She will draw out tattoo ideas and judge each placement.

Speaking of tattoos, you constantly trace hers with a light touch that sends shivers down her spine.

Brushing and playing with each other’s hair. She actually melts in your hands once you take her braids out and start massaging her scalp.

Will bite your arm out of excitement. The urge to chomp is just too great.

You comfort her differently depending on how bad her episode gets:

You either hold her impossibly close, hiding her face in your chest as you stroke her hair and start humming or talking about something she loves to ground her.

If she gets to a point where you can’t even approach without her backing away—or worse, getting violent—you dim every bright light and reduce any other stimuli. You don’t call her by her name—neither Jinx nor Powder—as both can trigger her even more. She will use some of her bombs to try and muffle the voices with the sounds of explosions, but you do hide any other weapons. You don’t talk too much or too loudly to not confuse her even more. Once she’s calm enough, it’s back to scenario number 1.

You’re both crying by the time her episode ends.

– “Please… Tell me you’re real.”

Jinx is so in tune with your emotions, and contrary to popular belief, she’s very empathetic.

She notices any tone or mood changes immediately.

If you’re mad at something or someone, she’ll be mad with you, if not even madder. You have her unconditional support because her trinket can do no wrong. She’s tracing her nails down your back or stroking your thigh as you’re rambling.

– “And then Sevika called me incompetent. Can you fucking believe it? How was I supposed to know that they put the shimmer there?!”

– “Sevika’s a bitch. That barrel was totally in your way.”

If you’re mad at her, she’ll spiral. You want to leave to cool down? Nuh-uh. She’s holding you so tightly, shaking like a leaf, that it makes your anger dissipate.

– “Don’t leave me, toots. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I’ll be better.”

If you’re sad or crying, she cups your face in her hands and makes you look at her as she praises you. She wipes every tear away. This is also the only other time she will reach for a hug over your shoulders/around your neck—no paint bombs included. She just wants to cradle your head and soothe you.

[bytemee]

mean!sorority!karina x loser!gp!reader headcannons? 🙂‍↕️

WORST BEHAVIOR — yu jimin headcannons.

read the one shot here!

pairings. mean!sorority!karina x loser!gp!reader

warning(s). pet names (karina calling u puppy), jealous & possessive!karina, let me know if there’s more

words. 802

authors note. this is the first time i EVER did headcannons… got too lazy to add nsfw ones though 😞

navigation. main masterlist.

mean!sorority!karina who calls you ‘puppy’ more than your actual name because, in her eyes, that’s exactly what you are—her pathetic, obedient little lapdog.

mean!sorority!karina who keeps you on a short leash. you’re not allowed to talk to certain people, go to certain parties without her knowing, or—god forbid—ignore her texts. if you take too long to respond, she’ll send a follow-up: “puppy? don’t make me come find you.”

mean!sorority!karina who loves making you flustered. she’ll drag her fingers along your jaw, trace her nails down your arms, lean in as if she’s going to kiss you—only to pull away at the last second and laugh.

mean!sorority!karina who got possessive without realizing it. she still made fun of you relentlessly, but the moment someone else tried? her tone turned cold. “i didn’t say you could talk to them.”

mean!sorority!karina who bullies you in public, but gets territorial in private. if someone else messes with you? suddenly, she’s not amused.

mean!sorority!karina who hated how much she noticed you. the way your ears turned red when she got too close. how you always showed up when she needed you, no matter how ridiculous her request was.

mean!sorority!karina who would never admit she liked you first. instead, she’d just scoff, roll her eyes, and mutter, “ugh. why do you have to be so pathetic?” as if it was your fault she was falling.

mean!sorority!karina who is the most demanding, impatient person ever. she wants kisses when she wants them, and nothing is going to stop her from getting what she wants—not even you.

mean!sorority!karina who tries to hide it, but her heart melts when you do cute things. when you offer her the last cookie, or tell her she looks nice in a dress, or hold the door open for her.

mean!sorority!karina who doesn’t know how to express her feelings properly. so, when she says, “you’re so annoying,” or, “you’re lucky i tolerate you,” or, “it’s not that i like you or anything,”—you know it really means, “i love you.”

mean!sorority!karina who acts like she’s doing you a favor by letting you be around her. “you should be grateful, puppy. not everyone gets to be my personal lapdog.” but the truth is, she’d probably go insane if you ever actually left.

mean!sorority!karina who gets jealous so easily, it’s ridiculous. she’ll roll her eyes and act uninterested, but if she catches you laughing a little too hard at someone else’s joke? she’s suddenly in your space, hands on your collar, whispering, “what’s so funny? care to share with the class?”

mean!sorority!karina who uses her nails to tease you constantly. she loves the way you freeze up when she drags them down your arm or across the back of your neck. and she always does it when she knows you can’t react—like in public or in front of her friends.

mean!sorority!karina who finds excuses to touch you, even when she doesn’t have to. adjusting your hoodie strings, fixing your hair, pulling you close by your belt loop just to whisper something unnecessary. she’s addicted to how easily she can fluster you.

mean!sorority!karina who says she doesn’t do relationships, but somehow, you’re different. she doesn’t know when it happened, but suddenly, she’s only interested in you. and when someone asks if you two are a thing, she just scoffs and says, “she’s just my pup. i keep her around.”

mean!sorority!karina who would act like she doesn’t care, but if you ever tried to leave? if you ever pulled away from her, even slightly—suddenly, she’s not so nonchalant anymore.

mean!sorority!karina who will corner you at a party, arms crossed, voice deceptively calm. “what’s this i hear about you ignoring me, puppy?” and if you try to play dumb, her lips curve into a smirk that doesn’t reach her eyes. “don’t test me.”

mean!sorority!karina who will scoff, roll her eyes, and mutter, “fine. go.” if you ever seriously consider walking away. but the second you actually turn your back, she’s grabbing your wrist, yanking you close, and whispering, “you think you can just leave me?”

mean!sorority!karina who won’t beg, won’t admit she’s scared, but if you ever really push her—if you tell her you’re done, that she can’t keep stringing you along—her mask finally cracks. her voice will drop as she mutters, “you don’t get it, do you? you’re mine, puppy.”

mean!sorority!karina who is terrified you’ll realize that somewhere along the way, she became yours, too.

[p0orbaby]

The Dog House

summary: leah misses date night, she tries to make it up to you

warnings: leah being leah i guess…

a/n: based off this request !

word count: 1.2k

-

Leah’s been distracted lately. It’s not that you’re not important to her—you are—but there’s a lot going on. Training, media obligations, a sudden obsession with learning to bake sourdough bread for reasons you don’t quite understand. And her house is full of these massive jars of starter that she’s named things like “Gertrude” and “Stephen” and “Samantha.” Stephen’s the strongest one, apparently. Not that you care.

You’re trying to be supportive. Really, you are. But it’s getting weird.

So when you text her a gentle reminder about date night, you’re half-expecting a response that sounds like it’s written by one of those clunky bots—like, “Of course, darling! Can’t wait to see you tonight! ❤️❤️❤️” That’s what she’d usually do. Instead, you get nothing.

Hours pass. You start to get annoyed. Then you get anxious. Then you start wondering if maybe Leah’s planning some big surprise and that’s why she’s not responding. You imagine her secretly arranging a rooftop dinner with fairy lights and a string quartet, where she’ll confess she’s been so preoccupied because she’s actually writing a book about how incredible you are.

But then you come back to reality and grasp she probably just forgot.

By 7 PM, you’re pacing around the flat, wearing the outfit you picked out two days ago—a dress you specifically bought because Leah said you looked “so fucking sexy” in red, even though it’s so tight you can’t even breathe properly. Your makeup is perfect, your hair is styled, and you’re sitting on the couch, stewing in a potent cocktail of Chanel No. 5 and disappointment.

Finally, you text her again.

> Hey, you on your way?

Nothing.

Ten minutes later, still nothing.

By 8 PM, you’re starting to wonder what the protocol is for someone forgetting a date night. Do you call? Do you show up to their house with a “We need to talk” face? Do you… dump them? No, that’s too extreme, even though it would make a great story for your friends.

Finally, at 8:13, your phone buzzes.

> Shit. Be there in 20. Promise. Don’t hate me

You almost laugh, except you’re too irritated to find anything funny right now. Twenty minutes? Twenty minutes is nothing. She probably still smells like whatever alien protein shakes she drinks after training, which you pretend to like but secretly think taste like a mix of chalk and regret.

But you wait. Because you love her. Or because you’re a sucker. Or both.

Leah arrives at 8:42, disheveled and clearly not sorry enough. She’s holding a Tesco bag, which is never a good sign. Tesco bags mean last-minute attempts at forgiveness, and you don’t care how cute she looks in her sweats.

Okay, you care a little, but still.

“I’m so sorry,” she says as she bursts through the door, dropping the bag for life onto the floor like she’s just run a marathon. “I lost track of time”

You cross your arms and give her a look. The kind of look that says, Really?

“I know, I know,” she continues, talking at a speed that suggests she’s trying to cram a day’s worth of apologies into the next thirty seconds. “I’ve been so caught up with—”

“—Stephen?”

Leah blinks. “Stephen?”

“Your sourdough. Stephen”

“Oh. Right.” Leah runs a hand through her hair, which only makes it messier. “I might’ve forgotten to feed him, too”

“I’m sure he’s devastated,” you say, deadpan.

“I’m devastated,” Leah says, doing her best impression of someone who’s sincerely regretful. She takes a step closer, giving you that puppy-dog look that normally melts you but tonight just feels like she’s trying to disarm a bomb. “But I have a plan”

You raise an eyebrow. “A plan?”

“Yeah. A plan to make it up to you.” She’s bouncing on the balls of her feet like she’s about to reveal a new Tesla or something.

You stare at her, unimpressed. “Does it involve anything that’s not in that bag?”

She laughs, and you can’t help but soften a little. She’s got this laugh that makes you feel like everything is going to be okay, even when she’s screwed up royally.

“Come on,” she says, grabbing the bag and heading to the kitchen. “Trust me. You’ll love it”

You don’t follow her immediately. You want to see how this plays out before you commit to pretending everything is okay. So you stand there in the doorway, watching as she pulls out ingredients that don’t really go together.

“Leah, what exactly are you planning to do with pickles, chocolate syrup, and a single red onion?”

She grins at you like she’s just cracked the code to the universe. “It’s a surprise”

“I’m surprised you even made it here alive if that’s what you’ve been eating lately”

Leah’s grin doesn’t waver. She’s on a mission now, and there’s no stopping her. “Look, just sit down. I’ve got this”

You sit, but mostly because your feet hurt in the heels you’re wearing and the sofa is closer than the bedroom. Leah’s bustling around the kitchen, and you can’t tell if she’s actually cooking or just making noise to buy herself more time.

Minutes later, she emerges with a tray. The tray has candles on it, which is at least a step in the right direction. Then you see what she’s made.

Two plates of what can only be described as… nachos. But they’re not nachos. They’re a weird interpretation of nachos where the tortilla chips have been replaced with some kind of protein bar, the cheese is… okay, there’s no cheese, and the toppings are just random things she found in your fridge.

She sets the tray down in front of you with the pride of a five-star chef presenting their signature dish.

“Voilà!” she announces, beaming.

You stare at the concoction in front of you, then back at her. “Leah, what the hell is this?”

“It’s my way of saying sorry”

You look at her, then at the nachos again. “You could’ve just said ‘I’m sorry’ like a normal person”

“But this is better,” she insists, her enthusiasm unwavering. “It’s like, an experience”

“Yeah, I’m experiencing regret,” you say, eyeing the “nachos” with suspicion.

Leah laughs again, this time a little sheepishly. “Okay, so maybe the food’s not great. But it’s the thought that counts, right?”

“You’re seriously expecting me to eat this?” you ask, poking at one of the protein bars with your fork like it might bite back.

Leah’s face falls just a little, and suddenly, you realise that she’s actually trying. She’s terrible at this—so, so terrible—but she’s trying.

And that’s why you love her.

“Fine,” you say with a sigh. “But if I get food poisoning, you’re sleeping on the couch”

She grins, leaning in to kiss you on the cheek. “Deal”

You end up eating the nachos. They’re awful, but Leah’s so happy you’re eating them that you can’t help but smile. She’s sitting there, watching you like you’re the most fascinating thing in the world, and you can’t help but remember that this is her way of showing she cares.

After dinner, she pulls out a bottle of wine—an actual, normal bottle of wine—and the two of you sit on the sofa, talking and laughing until you’re both too tired to keep your eyes open.

She falls asleep first, her head on your shoulder, snoring softly. You’re still a little annoyed at her, but you know she’ll make it up to you in other ways. And tomorrow, you’ll probably laugh about this whole thing.

[newnlovesjennie]

op hcs: taking a shower with them!

strawhats x reader! cw: suggestive material for sanji and zoro

luffy:

will be messing around the entire time

throwing water at your face, playing with rubber ducks… you know, just being luffy

will refuse unless its a bubble bath

he doesn’t really need massages because, well, he’s made of rubber, but he’ll gladly give you one! (he will try)

you two get to role-play as war generals while your rubber ducks go to war

overall not really sexual, he’d kinda be too busy having fun 

nami:

will go ALL out, bath bombs sugar scrubs scented candles EVERYTHING

nami goes all out in general whenever she showers by herself, so why not treat her gf even better?

you will get the absolute best scalp massage of your life, and she’ll massage every part of your body until you forget what tension is

warning: it will probably be difficult to concentrate when you’re in front of her while she’s naked

afterwords you’ll braid each others hair and do face masks, just an adorable little spa day

zoro:

this man REEKS

when you get in that bathtub you come in with a MISSION

you instantly get to work and throw out his 12-in-one shampoo and clean him properly

with his back pressed against your chest and your fingers delicately threading through his scalp, he’ll mumble something about how it feels okay-ish, and you’ll know you won

argue with him to shave his armpits bc he stinks but you eventually win

he’ll insist on washing your body, with his hands lingering on some parts, inciting a playful kick to his stomach and a giggle

usopp:

he’ll be a bit worried when you ask to shower with him 

he’s a bit insecure about his body, especially as someone as beautiful and amazing as you seeing it 

his plan: absolutely covering the tub in bubbles and soap to the point its overflowing so he can just hide inside it

sadly, you’re too smart and know him too well, and after five minutes of you complaining about usopp getting out of the tub to help you clean and him staying put under his blanket of bubbles, you’re able to guess why

some reassuring hugs and kisses later, you’re back to the regularly scheduled programming and he’s showing his multi step hair care routine while you’re in awe 

you walk away knowing 10x more about hair

sanji:

…. im sure you all know how this will go

25 seconds into you walking in the tub he has a nosebleed and taints the bath water

but besides that, he’s like nami on steroids

rose petals, candles, bath bombs, wine, fairy lights, dude got it all (after all, showering with your lover is one of the greatest forms of intimacy!)

after cleaning up the bath and replacing the water, he climbs back in and tries to hold his composure as his eyes take your naked form in

he’s seen you naked before, but nonetheless its a holy experience every time

“stop gawking, perv!” you’d playfully yell, and pull him in until he’s elbows deep in the water and grinning

he will take the utmost care to your body, massaging every last corner and gracing his slender fingers through each rift, leaving a trail of delicate kisses wherever he passes

“sanji, you’re supposed to be cleaning my body, not leaving your spit!” “sorry, mon amour, but can you really blame me?

[00valentina-writes00]

✞⛧Sevika/Abby/Ellie if you cheated on them ✞⛧

Warnings: Mentions of cheating, angst m?

✞⛧ Sevika ✞⛧

✞⛧ Sevika doesn’t react right away. She’s too angry, too betrayed to speak. The silence between you two feels suffocating. She just stares at you, her grey eyes turning cold like metal, her jaw clenched so tight you can almost hear her teeth grind.

✞⛧ She’ll act like it doesn’t bother her at first. She’s tough. She’s not the kind of person who lets things like this get to her. But the truth is, it cuts deeper than any blade. The realization that you—her person, her ally, the one person she’d let in—would do this to her? It’s too much. It’s a betrayal she can’t shake off.

✞⛧ Don’t expect her to shout, to throw things, to cry. Sevika doesn’t cry. She’ll leave instead, disappearing for a few hours, but when she comes back, she’s colder than before. Her metal arm will be clenched tight, and her voice will be low, almost a growl, when she speaks.

✞⛧ She’ll corner you in a room and ask in the most dangerous tone possible, “Did you really think I wouldn’t find out? Did you think I’m that stupid?” But there’s no yelling. It’s all calm, controlled rage.

✞⛧ Sevika will demand answers, but she won’t beg. She’ll force you to say the truth, to admit it, and when you do, her gaze will be so intense, so full of pain, that it’ll break your heart to see it. But she won’t show the hurt on her face. No, she’ll mask it with anger, with disgust.

✞⛧ She’ll remind you of everything she’s done for you. All the times she protected you, fought for you, killed for you. How she made you hers in every sense of the word. But now? Now you’ve thrown it all away for someone else. For what? A stupid mistake?

✞⛧ Sevika won’t scream. She won’t make a scene. But her body will shake with fury, her fists clenching at her sides. If you don’t beg her to stay, if you don’t apologize properly, she will walk away. Not even a backward glance.

✞⛧ You’ll feel the weight of her absence for days, weeks, months. When you come across her in public, you’ll see the way others look at you with pity, knowing what you did. But Sevika? She’ll act like you never existed. She’ll keep her distance, refusing to give you the satisfaction of seeing her hurt.

✞⛧ She won’t immediately forgive you. It’ll take time. If she does forgive you, it’s not going to be easy. She’ll keep you at arm’s length, never fully trusting you again. And when she does decide to let you back in, there’s no guarantee you’ll be the same person you were before. You’ll have to prove you’re worthy of her trust again, and that won’t happen overnight.

✞⛧ If you beg for her forgiveness, don’t expect it to be given easily. Sevika’s pride won’t let her give in that quickly. She’ll make you work for it—show her you’re sorry, prove that you won’t do it again.

✞⛧ She’ll probably stop calling you “hers” for a while, at least until she knows she can trust you again. You’ll feel the sting of her indifference every time you see her with someone else, every time you hear her laugh with someone else.

✞⛧ But you know what’s worse than her coldness? The rare moments when she lets her guard down. When she finally speaks to you, when her voice cracks with the emotion she’s been holding back. That’s when you realize just how deeply she was hurt. That’s when the guilt eats you alive.

✞⛧ If you think Sevika won’t find a way to punish you, you’re dead wrong. She might not do anything overt, but she’ll make sure you feel the consequences. A cold shoulder. A brush off. A reminder that she’s a force to be reckoned with—and you’re not the only one who can be ruthless.

✞⛧ Sevika won’t apologize for anything, but her actions will eventually speak louder than words. If she’s willing to take you back, she’ll show you in the way she holds you when she thinks you’re asleep, in the way she keeps her arm around you when no one else is around. But even then, there’ll always be a part of her that’s guarded, that’s holding back. Because you’ve proven that even the strongest walls can come down. And she can never forget that.

•|||——————————————————————|||•

✞⛧Abby ✞⛧

✞⛧ Abby finds out in the worst way possible. You think you’ve been subtle, but she’s been watching, quietly observing every small change in your behavior. She notices the way your smile doesn’t quite reach your eyes anymore, the way you avoid her touch, the way you get quiet after your phone buzzes. She knows. She always knows.

✞⛧ When she confronts you, she’s calm. Too calm. It makes your stomach drop because you know that when Abby is this still, this composed, it means she’s broken. Her voice doesn’t shake, but you can see the hurt in her eyes, even if she tries to hide it behind that stoic, cold façade.

✞⛧ Abby won’t scream. She won’t yell. She just… stops. She’s quiet for a long time, and that silence feels like it stretches on forever. It eats away at you, because the worst part is that she’s not angry—she’s disappointed. She’ll never yell. She won’t even beg you to explain. She’ll just leave. And that will hurt more than anything.

✞⛧ When she walks away, it feels like everything in her life just crumbled. All the walls she built to protect herself, everything she sacrificed, was because she trusted you. And now it feels like all of it is gone.

✞⛧ You’ll try to apologize, to explain that it was a mistake, but Abby’s not stupid. She’ll cut you off before you can even finish, her eyes sharp like knives, “Don’t you dare. I’m not stupid. Don’t make me regret ever giving you that trust.”

✞⛧ She won’t leave immediately, but she’ll pull away, emotionally, physically. Her touch? Gone. Her warmth? Gone. You’ll feel cold, like you’re just a ghost in her life now.

✞⛧ Every attempt to make things right will feel like it’s hitting a brick wall. You’ll buy her gifts, write her notes, try to touch her hand… but nothing works. She doesn’t want your apologies, she doesn’t want your gifts. She wants the trust that you broke—and now it’s gone forever.

✞⛧ You’ll regret it. Oh, you’ll regret it so hard. Because Abby Anderson isn’t the type to let go of people easily. When she loves, she loves deeply. And when she cuts someone out of her life, it’s like she never even knew them.

✞⛧ You’ll sit there, remembering the way her fingers would curl around yours, how she’d soften when she kissed you, the warmth of her body wrapped around yours at night. And then it hits you: I fucked up. You threw that all away.

✞⛧ And the worst part? When she’s gone, Abby won’t look back. She’ll keep moving forward. She’ll survive, like she always does, but it will kill her inside. Because she thought you were worth fighting for. And now, she’s fighting against herself. She’s fighting to forget you.

✞⛧ Maybe you’ll see her again, maybe you won’t. But every time you do, you’ll see the coldness in her eyes that wasn’t there before. You’ll see the wall between you, a divide she built to protect herself. She’ll never forgive you, not fully, and the pain of that will linger with you for as long as you live.

✞⛧ Abby doesn’t forgive easily, especially when it comes to betrayal. And now you’ll never be able to take back the damage you caused.

•|||——————————————————————|||•

✞⛧ Ellie ✞⛧

✞⛧ Ellie would feel a pit in her stomach, like someone just ripped her heart out and stomped on it. She doesn’t know if she wants to scream or cry, so she does both in her head while trying to stay calm on the outside.

✞⛧ She wouldn’t confront you right away. No, she’d need time to process. Maybe a couple days of silence where she avoids your gaze, her mind racing, but too hurt to speak up.

✞⛧ When she finally confronts you, it’s not with anger. It’s with quiet, devastated hurt. Her voice shakes, her hands trembling, and she’s trying to hold back tears. “Why? Was I not enough for you? What did I do wrong?”

✞⛧ She’s the type to think she’s messed up somehow. That she’s broken. Maybe you left because of something she couldn’t give you, maybe it’s her past catching up to her—her survivor’s guilt, her trauma.

✞⛧ The guilt would consume her. Even if you were the one in the wrong, Ellie would still find a way to blame herself. She’d second-guess everything she did for you. “Did I push you away? Was I too much?”

✞⛧ Her jealousy would become unbearable. Every time you talked to someone else, a dull ache would sting in her chest, knowing what happened. She’d try to act like she’s fine, but the weight of the betrayal would linger in her eyes.

✞⛧ If you tried to explain yourself, Ellie would shut down. She doesn’t want excuses. It’s too late for words now. She wants to forget everything and pretend like it never happened.

✞⛧ She’d probably push you away at first. Not because she doesn’t care, but because it hurts too much to love you knowing what you’ve done. She’d rather you hate her than face the possibility of being with you and feeling that same sting every time you touch her.

✞⛧ But deep down, she’d want you to fight for her. Not with words, but with actions. Show her that you’re sorry. Show her that you really want her. But she won’t admit it. Instead, she’ll act cold, distant, and self-destructive.

✞⛧ Ellie would start locking herself away even more. Her guitar would be the only thing that comforts her, strumming out painful, broken chords, her soul pouring into each note.

✞⛧ Every time she sees you, there’s this flicker of hope in her that maybe, just maybe, you’ll regret it, but it fades every time you look at her like she’s just a thing to you.

✞⛧ If you genuinely want to make amends, it would take a long time. Ellie’s not one to easily forgive, not when the wound is this deep. She’d need space to heal, but even then, she’d always wonder if you’d hurt her again.

✞⛧ She’d become distant, but in her quiet, fragile way, she’d want to be loved again—just not in the same way, because she can never go back to the naive hopefulness she had before. That part of her is gone.

✞⛧ The scars would remain. She could never forget, not fully. But she might forgive, in time—if only because, deep down, she still loves you. Even if it scares her. Even if it hurts too much.

✞⛧ But don’t be mistaken. She’s no fool. If you do it again, she’ll walk away. And she won’t look back.

[hauntedjellyfishwitch-blog]

Famous Last Words

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x Reader (No use of Y/N)

Summary: She'll never let him believe he isn't loved, even when he doesn't deserve it.

TW: None.

“Be careful. I love you”

She hears the snort of derision he lets out and resists the urge to roll her eyes at him lest she makes things worse. He’s like a cornered animal when he’s upset, all consuming anger to cover the vulnerability he doesn’t want to acknowledge exists. She’s worried the wrong move will make him tell her to ‘fuck off an’ then fuck off som’ more’ like he had the night before.

“Though’ ya were mad at me” He grunts, scuffing the toe of his boot in the pebble-dashed dirt, other leg poised to keep moving further away from her and closer to the run he’s supposed to be going on.

“I am mad at you, you’re mad at me too” She raises an eyebrow before scanning her eyes down, taking note of the way he’s picking at the skin of his thumb; a nervous habit he’s had the whole time she’s known him. He’s nervous, as if one fight will make her leave him, as if she’s going to suddenly realise he isn’t worth the effort. She huffs a small, understanding smile at him “I still love you, and I’m never going to risk that not being the last thing you hear me say”

He pauses at the gate, tilts his head to the side and looks at her properly, sees the way she’s looking at him wide eyed and concerned, the way her shoulders are tense. Whenever they fight he convinces himself he’s being left, talks himself into thinking she doesn’t care and here she is, mad at him, fighting with him and still refusing to let him believe she doesn’t whilst being scared he won’t come back for different reasons.

He strides forward suddenly, twisting his body to close the gap between them and slings an arm around her shoulder, bringing her in to press his lips to the top of her head. He lingers, lips against the hair he loves so much.

“I love ya”

“Be careful. I love you” She repeats, knowing the words have sunk in when he raises one side of a lip fleetingly before opening the clanking metal chain.

-

It was a stupid fight, in hindsight, the kind they probably wouldn’t have if anyone had eaten a full meal for dinner rather than whatever percentage of rabbit there was split between twelve people. Or maybe they would, because they could have twelve rabbits and Daryl would still give his up for someone else, and it would infuriate her just the same that he sacrifices his own wellbeing for them at every opportunity. She suspects it’s only half about taking care of others, and maybe a solid thirty percent just not thinking he deserves care; the other twenty percent she is entirely unwilling to examine.

It was a fight though, one that ought to have been kinder than it was. One that she wishes she could have kept her cool in, but she’ll be fucked if Daryl is the only one who gets to be angry. She stews on it, sitting perched on the solid prison cot, playing it over and over in her mind until she hears heavy footsteps outside the makeshift door. She’d recognise them anywhere, his distinctive gait and well-worn shoes that always scrape on the second step when he’s not trying to sneak. The consideration, even in his unconscious actions, is part of the reason she loves him as fiercely as she does.

She doesn’t get up, doesn’t allow herself to follow the overwhelming urge to rush towards him when he opens the bars and lifts aside the curtain. He bites the inside of his lip.

“’M sorry”

“Me too”

She moves then, coming to a stop in front of him to run her hands over the solid muscles under his shirt, checking him for cuts and scrapes, feels him exhale underneath her palms. He’s always taken by the act, no matter how long they’ve been together or how often he goes out. He remains captured by the tenderness and care she bestows upon him. He is, still, so unused to the kindness, so out of depth when the only gentleness he’s known has been a cover for malice, false sense of security so quickly followed by pain.

“Ain’t sure what I did t’ deserve ya love” He mumbles into the same spot on the crown of her head. The spot he kisses when he fucks her, the place his chin rests when he hugs her after a long day, the spot he’d patted condescendingly when he was too embarrassed to admit he liked her but needed an excuse to make contact.

Finally, after almost twenty four hours of not making contact, at least twenty three too long, she kisses him, presses her lips firmly to his, relishing the way he instantly responds. When she pulls away it’s with a smile, an always fucking present smile he’ll never get enough of, the smile that’s his.

“You don’t have to deserve it, you don’t have to earn it, its just there”

He eats more that night, sitting by the fire running a thumb soothingly on her knee as he takes a well earned swig from a bottle of water. He wants her to see it, wants her to know he's trying; and if he has to trick himself into it by thinking it's for her, caring for himself because she needs him to, then it'll have to do for now.

[ripplestitchskein]

What I loved most about Sinsmas is how well it’s setting up what will be the probable trajectory of Season 3 while resolving the conflicts of Season 2.

Octavia and Blitz are set on a similar path, realizing that Stolas needs more than they can give him, but not because they aren’t enough but because he has a mental illness. This conflict is setup explicitly to tie in with Barbie, Blitz will realize that whatever happened probably wasn’t as much his fault as he thinks, she just needed more than he could give alone. So I stand by the speculation that resolving Stolas and Blitz next season is going to be directly paralleled by Blitz and Barbie but will at the same time bring Octavia and Blitz into an accord.

Stolas will be getting several more reality checks and will spiral pretty hard, but I am holding on to faith that we will get a happy medium between getting proper treatment and reconciling his relationship with Blitz. I think Sinsmas did a great job setting up him as not realizing his continued unhappiness, even though he got everything he wanted with Blitz, is not a reflection on their relationship being ill suited but because he does have a mental illness that he is not treating properly or sharing with those around him. Blitz sidestepping the horse backstory while Stolas pulls back on asking him for help getting his meds was a perfect and succinct way to show this upcoming conflict.

Just excellent visuals with that all around. Blitz being the one to snuggle and try to be close to him while Stolas is the one closed off and refusing to relent was really solid. I would bet on this being the opening imagery of S3, some rehashing of Blitz trying but Stolas remaining closed off and that leading to a split that is slowly repaired over the course of the season, ending with them finally embracing each other.

The subtle cues from the imps of hell during the domesticity montage also great. Just this hatred Hell has for Stolas and how they will have to fight to be together. Like this was echoed in the fight with Andy as well, Stolas succumbing to being swallowed alive by a monster and Blitz going after him. Depression metaphor wow. The fight itself could be echoed in S3 too but this time with them working together.

And then everything with Millie, like her still not being on the same page when it comes to a family with kids while Moxxie and Blitz are opposed. Her reassuring Moxxie that her not wanting this doesn’t mean she doesn’t love him, and how that will play through S3.

Seeing Loona taking more responsibilities and stepping in for her father, seeing her with friends excited about board games. Too cute. I don’t know where she’ll go in S3 but I love her development so far and how they’ve taken a quieter approach to her parallels with Octavia and Stolitz.

Just a really great season finale.

[sainzzsturns]

Beach Day

R. Cameron x reader

category: fluff

warnings: past drug use mention, teary rafe

summary: family day at the beach

a/n: sorry for it being so short, i’m lwk depressed so i’ve got no motivation lol love this man though

“baby, she’s gonna be cold and get sick…” rafe muttered annoyed from the sand, watching you and your baby sit together on the shallow water, only small waves hitting your feet.

“rafe, handsome, it’s not even cold out, she’s having the time of her life” you chuckle, watching the toddler splash water around.

the older cameron snickers, walking over to you, “should we re-apply sunscreen-”

“rafe, jesus christ! can you stop freaking out and have some fun with us? everything is fine, i promise.” you interrupt.

“right- right- sorry i just wanna make sure im doing everything right…”

“love, you’re the best dad ever, stop stressing so much, otherwise you’re gonna spend more time freaking out than with your daughter” you reason, gently, but making sure your message gets through.

he sighs, finally sitting down beside you, pulling his shirt off, “you’re right, sorry baby…”

“don’t apologize, you’re good” you smile, kissing his cheek.

he smiles, holding your cheek, pulling your face as to properly kiss him. in between pecks, your daughter giggles, poking her dad’s chest, trying to get his attention.

rafe grabs a hold of her, poking her belly too, making her laugh, throwing herself against the water.

as he laughs and shakes her playfully, the water continues to hit her body, eventually getting into her eyes. now, any other kid would’ve gotten slightly scared and their parents would clean their eyes and they’d go back to normal. not your daughter, her dramatic genes (she probably got from her father) made her hysterically scream and cry, throwing a tantrum.

rafe though, started freaking out. immediately pulling her up into his arms and running over to your bag where bottles of water were sitting.

when the stinging in her eyes stopped and she calmed down, rafe looked up from the sun chair he sat on, his lost puppy eyes and lip pouted.

“hey, it’s okay, honey. she’s alright, everyone’s got salt water in their eyes at least once” you tried comforting, but it was no use.

“but it was my fault, i let the stupid ocean hurt my baby girl- see i told you this wasn’t a good idea…” he rambled.

“rafe, handsome, it’s okay, accidents happen. all she’ll remember is how her daddy saved her, okay? you’re good.” you chuckled softly, rubbing his back as he gazed down at the baby snuggled in his arms. “it’s late and she was getting fussy anyway, the sun’s already setting, let’s go home, yeah?”

the older man nodded, wrapping a towel around the baby girl, holding her against his body, rocking her gently. you chuckled, grabbing the bags and car keys.

when you finally got home, rafe made sure to feed her properly and give her a nice shower before tucking her in, wanting to "compensate" for his earlier mistake.

after coming down the stairs, rafe sits beside you on the couch, your hand instinctively rubbing against his buzz cut.

he sighs, resting his head against your shoulder. “i’m scared of messing up…”

“messing what up?” you ask, leaning forward to look at him.

“this whole fatherhood thing… what if im not a good dad?”

“rafe, sweetie, you went through so much trouble with your dad, i’m sure you know what our daughter does and doesn’t need in a dad…” you attempt to comfort, kissing his forehead.

“still, what if i mess up? what if i neglect her enough to make her do drugs like me? what if—”

“rafe.” you interrupted, “don’t ever say something like that. you fell into that because of multiple reasons, we won’t let her, okay? you didn’t have your mom to turn to… so even if you accidentally neglect her — which i’ll make sure you don’t — i’ll be there for her. and look at you, even though you fell into that you’re here, doing well, with your own business, wife and kid. everything will be fine, alright? i’m right here with you…”

“thank you, sweetheart. i know that as long as you’re with me everything will be alright. thank you for always being here for me…”

“of course, i love you more than anything, rafe” you nod, cupping his cheeks.

his slightly glossy eyes close as his chin, tucked into a pout, trembles. you instantly hug him, kissing his head and rubbing his back repeatedly, whispering soft words to him.

“i love you more, gorgeous”

you chuckle softly, kissing him.

[angelanderson]

SUCK IT— ELLIE WILLAIMS

you want a kiss, but ellie wants something first. cw: strap on sucking (ellie receiving), mean dom!ellie, bratty!r, r!receiving, light degradation. established relationship. u decide if au or not :) MINORS & MEN DNI. (long-ish tbh ! adding word count soon!) enjoy!! xoxoxoxo <3

── ⋅⋅⋅ ────꒰ ୨ ♡ ୧ ꒱──────────

ellie is beyond fed up with the attitude you’ve had all day. it seems like anyone and anything is setting you off, and she’s at the receiving end of it. she’s lost count of how many times she’s told you to stop rolling your eyes today after the seventh time.

you both know you can’t disagree with what’s about to happen— you know ellie doesn’t tolerate a bratty attitude ever. in hopes she’ll somehow be lenient with you, you look at her through thick lashes from your current position on the floor. a nervous whimper almost escapes your lips as you watch her ignore your attempts. you now accept that there won’t be any leniency tonight after all stunts you’ve pulled today.

“e-ellie?” you whine out, craving her warmth again. you hate when she doesn’t give you attention, and she knows that.

ellie hums, shamelessly eyeing your naked figure. she watches you squirm for a few more seconds for her pure enjoyment. while she’s acting nonchalant, she’s feeling anything but inside. she needs to scratch the itch that is punishing you, but your girlfriend knows to play the long game by now.

“already whining, huh? That’s kinda pathetic. Don’t you think so, baby?” she teases you, making you whine more.

you speak before even thinking about the words that leave your lips. “no! i’m not pathetic.”

ellie’s face visibly drops at that. you know you’re truly in for it now. you have the audacity to talk back? ellie can have what you’ll think is the audacity to make you work even harder for her forgiveness now. after all, she’s always shown you she can play meaner than you.

“oh, is that so,” she asks as she raises an eyebrow before continuing, “guess i’ll just have to to make you listen. get on your knees properly. now!”

you scramble to follow her orders as you watch intently watch to see what her next move is. to your surprise, you see the strap bounce as she pulls down her pants and boxers in one movement. your previous assumption that that’s what she went to get while you stripped down is correct.

ellie starts up again, her condescending tone immediately shining through. “i can see you practically drooling, baby. now, here’s what is going to happen-“

you interrupt her, feeling an even stronger craving for her warm affection now. “e-ellie? kiss? please? ‘m really sorry.”

“you’re sorry, huh?” she lets your interruption slide.

you frantically nod. “yes, really, really sorry! pretty please els, i want a kiss.” a permanent pout seemingly etches upon your lips.

you think she’s going to give in as she leans in closer, but she doesn’t. she roughly grabs your chin instead, forcing you to make eye contact with her. her rough grip on you has your lips puckering, almost seemingly to tease you.

“you’re going to have to work for that kiss. time to let me use that mouth of yours for something more useful than mouthing off. you’ll get your kiss later, but only if you can be a good girl for me first.”

knowing it’s pointless to argue, you lean in to give the tip of her strap a kiss. you pause before you wrap your lips around the tip, giving it an experimental suck. ellie’s always told you she swears she can feel it as if it’s attached to her body. she even swears it could probably make her come, in which you always call her a loser after.

a soft gag can be heard as ellie pushes your head down on her plastic cock. your girlfriend doesn’t think she has to play nice with you after all your attitude from today. she also maybe not-so-secretly loves to watch the tears fall from your eyes as she moves your head up and down.

ellie feels absolutely ruined as she watches your mouth take her. god, how she wishes she could feel you like this. she does the second best thing she can think: she moves the strap lower so it’ll rub her clit as you suck her off.

the guttural moan you let out when you catch onto her makes the strap vibrate— ellie thinks she could come on the spot. she carelessly chases that feeling, making you gag, which makes her more frantic in return. ellie loves when you just let her use you now she wants to.

“fuck, baby. you don’t know how crazy you’re driving me right now. shit. you’re such an angel.”

a few more seconds is all it takes before ellie’s being pushed over the edge. legs trembling, she starts to see stars in her eyes. pure bliss has taken over her whole body. she continues to spout out her praises of how well you’re doing as she rides out her orgasm.

her incredulous laugh is the only sound filing the room after she manages to whisper out a “fuck”. she grabs you chin, forcing you to look up at her again. “holy shit, babe. i think you deserve your kiss now, yeah?”

the speed at which your nod makes you both dizzy. “yes! yes, please. was so, so good? right?”

giving into your pleas, ellie leans in to give you a kiss on the lips. her gentle kiss largely contracts her rough behavior that was less than two minutes ago. you can make out the faint taste of some of the cherry chapstick you gave her last week. you both melt more into the kiss.

after pulling away and wiping away the drool off of your chin, ellie groans after fulling taking in your current state. she needs to ruin you immediately. there’s no way she can spend another second without her hands on you. she knows she needs to give in now. “fuck. get on the bed.”

you don’t bother to respond. you all but fling yourself onto the bed, and into the position you know she likes. ellie always has you on your back, leaning against the pillows when she’s rewarding you. something or another about it being her turn to pleasure you.

barley giving you time to recover from just moments ago, ellie rolls your nipples around with her thumbs. your moans start to quiet down as she leans over to make out with you. your body starts feels warm in the best way possible.

starting to feel desperate again, you whine for her to do something more. “need you. please? i deserve it now. did what you said!”

“yeah, you’re right.” is the only reply ellie gives you before she starts moving down your body.

your breath catches in your throat as her fingers trail down your thighs. an excited tremble runs through your body as you watch it unfold. hands parting your legs, ellie practically whimpers at the sight of seeing your sticky cunt on display for her. she takes no time in sticking two fingers in you

the sudden intrusion makes your back arch with pleasure. you watch ellie work her fingers in and out of you through pleasure-driven hooded eyes. had your eyes been open, it’d be hard to miss the smirk plastered on ellie’s face.

ellie suddenly pulls out of you, causing you to cry out. she’s quick to soothe you. “baby, ‘m just taking my fingers out so i can slut you out on my strap. no need to worry that pretty little head.”

your giggle in response is cut short the second you start to feel ellie push into you. your hands find her back, starting to dig your nails in as she sinks all the way into you. a strangled moan leaves your lips. you feel so full. so good.

“oh. my. god.” it’s the only think you can think of to say now.

“mhm, feels good, my pretty girl, and yeah, just take it” are the only responses you get back from ellie. she’s also in her own little blissed out world with you.

wet sounds mixed with both of your incoherent moaning fill up the bedroom— you’re sure the neighbors can hear by now. but there’s no way you could you possibly care about that when your girlfriend is fucking you so hard that you’re seeing stars. every stroke makes you drip on the sheets even more.

ellie’s left thumb finds your clit as she starts to fuck you faster. your moans turn into incoherent babbling about how good you feel, thank you’s, and pleas for her to keep going. the feelings of sweet release start to wash over you like waves in the ocean. you feel as if you’re drowning with pleasure.

each thrust makes the room spin faster for you. ellie’s always felt amazing inside of you. your whole body is ignited with pleasure as you take everything ellie is giving you. you feel so close. any second now you’ll be the one cumming all over her cock.

picking up on this, ellie starts to speak normally again. “oh baby, are you gonna cum for me? gonna get my cock all wet for me, hmm? let go, baby, just let go.”

the second she tells you to let go is the second you hit peak bliss. your entire body twitches as your orgasm washes over you. ellie prolongs it by fucking you through it. she always makes you feel every last bit of your orgasm. and god, you haven’t felt this fucked out in a while now. you don’t think you’ll be walking normally for at least a day or two.

“baby?” ellie is the first to speak, like usual.

“els?”

“think you can go again? think you can handle me fucking you again?”

you know she’s feeling full of herself right now. she always does after she fucks you like this. “dunno, els. feeling very sensitive i think,” is your semi-questioning answer. you know she likes to overstimulate you.

“well that’s just too bad isn’t it? gonna have to give me another orgasm before i can forgive you for being a brat today. can’t be a brat anymore if i fuck you stupid and quiet, huh?”

your eyes snap open fully again after that. ellie’s freckled face is the closest thing in your line of vision. she’s wearing her classic look of fake sympathy on it. you’ve finally accept the fate of what’s going to be a very long night.

pouting, you question her, “can i have another kiss first at least?”

“yeah,” is the last thing ellie responds with before she crashes her lips against yours.

tag list: @cowgirlcherrie @cherriesxinthespring @ellies-princess @abbyskitty @dropsofs4turn @ellabsprincess @angelbill @cosmikoo @sosobaker @ellieismybbg

[repulsiveliquidation]

all the rain in the world.

warnings : angst, mentions of injury and binge-drinking. not proofread.

based on this poem!

all the rain in the world, can’t wash away how I feel about you.

Alexia watches as you wrap your arms around her. That gorgeous smile on your face was one that she wished she put on your face. Your eyes sparkled in the dim light as her hands held your waist and lifted you in her arms.

Her hands held you up with practiced ease. She pulled that giggle out of you way too easily. The others were enjoying the PDA. She heard Pina and Patri making fun of you and her. She heard them tell you two to get a room. She heard them say they wished to find a love like yours.

It made Alexia’s blood boil. She knew she had no right to be angry. You moved on too quickly in her opinion, leaving her to pick up the pieces. In her eyes, you abandoned her when she needed you. In the back of her head though, she knew she was to blame. She never gave you a chance.

In her anger, she gripped her water bottle so tight it was squirting water all over the changing room floor. She was sure if she let go she would do something she’d regret. Mapí notices her seething anger and places a hand on her shoulder and she shrugs it off, before standing and throwing the bottle into her cubby as she stomps out of the changing room. She stands just outside the door and takes deep breaths, fists clenched tight by her sides.

She could feel the tears pricking in her eyes. She breathed in her nose and out her mouth, praying for her tears to go away. She was shaking with how hard she was trying not the cry before she heard your voice muffled in the room.

“Was that Alexia?” you say, the sound of your cleats hitting the hard floor was clear as day. A chorus of yeah’s and I think so’s followed. The tears fell on their own, her heart breaking as she detected the genuine concern in your voice before she heard footsteps coming towards the door. She wiped her tears as fast as she could and walked towards the bathrooms to compose herself. You call out for her and she just walks faster, locking herself in the far stall trying to muffle her sniffling.

“Ale?” you call, voice as soft as can be. Alexia bites her lip and her head hits the wall, her hands over her mouth to try and pretend she’s not in there. You can hear her crying and trying to suppress her sounds, your heart clenching uncomfortably in your chest when you hear your best friend’s sobs.  

“Ale, qué pasa?”

“No es nada.”

“The way you’re crying doesn’t sound like nothing.”

“I said it’s nothing, just leave me alone!” Alexia yells, opening the door and storming out of the bathroom. She doesn’t see the tears on your face, heart aching just like hers was at the thought of her best friend not trusting her with her troubles.

Alexia bumps into her on the way out of the bathroom, mumbling a half-hearted sorry as she runs back to the changing room to grab her things and go home. She looks at the captain in bewilderment and steps into the bathroom to find her girlfriend splashing water on her tear-stained face.

“What did she say?” she asks, rubbing her girlfriend’s back. You shrug, sighing before hugging her.

“She hasn’t spoken to me properly in weeks, amor. I don’t know what I did wrong,” you mumble into her neck. She rubs soothing circles on your back and reassures you, citing that Alexia was probably stressed about her knee and was closing herself off like she usually did when she was struggling.

“This is not like her, she knows she can always come to me for help,”

“Give her some time, mi amor. She’ll come around.”

it makes me think how rain can flood, and love can sometimes feel smothering.

“Amor, keep up!”

“Ale, you’re the one with the long fucking legs!”

Alexia stops and you manage to catch up, bent over clutching the stitch in your side. She’s laughing and does not sound like she’s fighting for her life and you think you’ve got just enough energy to strangle your girlfriend.

“Why do you do this to me? Don’t you love me?”

“I love you so much, bebé. I am helping you, you just don’t see it yet,” she teases, starting to jog again. You’re about two miles from your house, Alexia was the one who thought it would be a good idea to go on a run before training that morning. She came knocking on your door, welcomed in by your mother who playfully scolded you for not being productive like Alexia.

You get home and are knackered, throwing your shirt off in front of Alexia. Being an 18-year-old with little to no experience in the bedroom, your actions put a blush on her face. You’re lying on the couch, chest heaving as the Barcelona heat rendered you out of breath. Alexia’s breath hitched in her throat for other reasons, eyes trained on your chest shamelessly. She didn’t realize she was staring till you pushed yourself up onto your elbows, grinning at her.

“Is there something here that interests you, Ms. Putellas?”

“Huh?”

“You’re staring, amor.”

“No, I am not.”

You stand, sauntering over before wrapping your arms around her neck. Her big hands come to rest on your hips instinctively, pulling you into her. You press your lips to hers and she kisses back eagerly. Her skin is hot from the run, her lips soft as ever. She pulls away and you smile, caressing the back of her neck.

“You know,” you say looking at the grandfather clock in the living room, “we’ve got two hours before training. That’s plenty of time to have a little fun…”

“Let’s not waste any time then,” Alexia grins, grabbing your arm and pulling you upstairs. She thanks all the gods she can remember that your mother isn’t home to hear all the sounds she hoped to pull out of you.

i want to be the small bit of sunshine, you carry around in your heart.

Alexia lays her head in your lap, listening as you read to her. You’re on a picnic together, one that Alexia herself put together. She got her mother to make your favorite and insisted on feeding you, giving you sweet kisses in between each mouthful.

She remembered the laugh you let out when Nala got loose and Alexia had to chase her, screaming at Nala to stop being a naughty girl and come back to her. Nala seemed to run even faster but made an abrupt U-turn when you whistled for her. She happily ran back to you, settled in your lap panting away. Alexia walked back over to you with a frown on her face, sitting on the picnic blanket facing away from you.

“Amor,” you coo, stroking Nala’s soft fur. Alexia huffs, arms crossed as she mumbles away under her breath.

“Alexia,” you try again, grinning as Nala crawls off your lap towards her mother. She doesn’t react as Nala climbs into her lap and begins licking the Catalan’s stone-faced expression. You scoot closer to her and lean on your arm with your legs stretched out and crossed. You struggle to suppress a smile and so does Alexia as she lifts Nala into the air.

“You betrayed me, pequeña. Mami is very hurt, you know,” she tells the little dog, hugging the squirming animal close to her chest. You chuckle and lean into her, Alexia pressing a long, loving kiss to your lips.

“I’m clearly her favorite,” you whisper and Alexia nods, stroking Nala gently.

“Guess I have to keep you around forever then.”

the person who reminds you of blue skies, and loves you the way you are.

“How much have you had to drink?” you ask her, mentally counting the number of empty bottles in the living room. Her injury setback was taking a toll on her and she was on a weekend bender, not picking up any of your calls or texts since Friday. You’ve been worried sick the whole time but couldn’t check on her since you were in London visiting your brother who worked there.

You called Mapí on Sunday panicking, asking if she had heard from Alexia all weekend. Ingrid was listening in and immediately assured you that they would check on her for you. You thanked them profusely before hanging up and pulling your laptop out to change your flight.

Mapí called just as your brother dropped you off at the airport, telling you that Alexia refused to open the door and you had the other key. You thanked Mapi and Ingrid for trying to check on her and that you were on the way home but they insisted on waiting for you to get back. You apologized to your brother for cutting your holiday short and he understood your distress, telling you to “go make sure she’s okay, kiddo. She needs you.”

Two hours later, you three stood in front of a very drunk Alexia with similar looks of anger and concern. Alexia only stared back at the three of you with a stupid grin on her face, boldly offering you a sip of what looked like her 15th bottle of beer.

“What are you doing to yourself? Are you insane?” you scolded, not letting her answer you. Ingrid was halfway through cleaning up all the bottles and plates, leaving Mapí and you to deal with Alexia.

“Amor, I missed youuuuu,” she slurred, standing up sharply before sitting back down when a sharp pain shot through her leg.

Mapí chews her out as you stand there at a loss for words. For weeks Alexia had kept you locked out, merely shrugging her problems off like they didn’t affect her when they did. She insisted that she would be fine while you were away, albeit a little offended when you told her Alba would come and check on her on Saturday. You didn’t like leaving her alone when she clearly needed you but you had booked this holiday before she was hurt again.

That was merely the beginning of her rapid decline, spending more and more time at the local bar after her rehab, and over time she got home later and later. You stayed up the first month, gently ushering her into the house and to bed, even picking her up a few times at odd hours when she was too out of it to call an Uber, let alone drive.

The fifth time you were woken up by her unique ringtone you had had enough, deciding then and there that this was the last time.

“Bebita! Ahí está mi hermosa chica!” she mumbled drunkenly as she got into the passenger seat. She leaned over for a kiss and you pushed her away, steam coming out of your ears. You didn’t know who was sitting in your passenger seat, this was not the overly responsible, i-never-drink-during-the-season, dedicated captain you had loved for over ten years, this was a broken version of that and you couldn’t stand the person she was becoming.

This was not the woman your 18-year-old self knew you were marrying. This was not the woman who made you race her before training “just because.” This was not the woman who got jealous of you because her dog learned to love you more than her. This was a woman who was destroying herself because she was stubborn and refused to admit she needed help, who refused to admit she needed you. There was some fault that was on your end, you clearly didn’t show her that she could lean on you no matter what. She didn’t think you were safe enough to be let into her noisy mind. You failed her. Insecurity filled your mind and you couldn’t face the impending fear of losing her so you took matters into your own hands.

You left that morning with a duffel back and a note placed on your side on the bed. Alexia woke up with a splitting headache, wanting nothing else than to bury her face in your hair and refuse to let you out of bed. She threw her hand over to your side and was met with cold sheets. She dragged her hand down the expanse of your side of the bed and felt the ruffle of paper, eyes shooting open in fear.

Her heart was in her throat and her headache a mere afterthought as she read your beautiful handwriting. You stated that you couldn’t deal with her absence any longer, the last few months felt like you had a roommate and not a girlfriend. You expressed that you felt upset with yourself for not giving you the confidence to come to you with her problems and she smudged your last words with her tears. They rained down on your letter, her heart ripped out of her chest as she realized she’d lost you forever.

[cobaltperun]

Eternal Flame (10) - In the End

Jenna Ortega x Female Reader

Summary: For her it’s a passion, for you it’s an accident. And as she continues shining brighter and brighter with each role you are left mesmerized, drawn to her flame and cherishing every time she lets herself be vulnerable with you.

Spotify playlist

Masterlist / First Part / Previous part / Next Part

Word Count: 7.3k

-I kept everything inside and even though I tried, it all fell apart-

The first time your and Jenna's photo leaked neither of you really noticed. Too wrapped up in spending time together to check the news. But in the wild lands of social media, the photo of you hugging Jenna from behind as she hugged you back as well as the position allowed back in the coffee shop provoked some thoughts.

Jennaortegafanpage: A relationship?

Jennafan36: Who even is that girl hugging her?

Hastoomuchtime4: On it!

Celebritynews: Probably just friends 🙄

Jennaortegafanpage: I don't know, Jenna looks really happy, and they look cute together 🥰

Hastoomuchtime4: Found her! Y/N L/N, she's Laura from Logan. Jenna follows her, but the account is private

Y/Ncomeback1: Is she finally acting again? 😭 She must be! Please let it be that!

And through it all, you just woke up one morning, confused about the sudden, and extreme, jump in follower requests on Instagram. "Fuck it, I should probably make the account public anyway," you were serious about acting, and some presence on social media probably wouldn't hurt. Right? Wait... why were so many requests from Jenna's fan pages?

It was probably nothing.

~X~

A week after you came back from Jenna’s place you found yourself stretching at the theatre. Hugh had quite a show in mind, and you’ve spent these past few days coming up with it, just the two of you. It was a challenge, but you bounced off each other really well. Today you’d be giving it a try for the first time.

Your phone suddenly rang in your bag and you remembered you didn’t put it on silent and mentally cursed yourself for not doing it, while also being thankful it didn’t interrupt your rehearsal. You strolled over to the bag and picked up your phone, it was just a message, and you unlocked your phone.

“You ready?” Hugh came in, dressed in quite a comfortable looking clothes. You wanted to get everything down perfectly before getting properly dressed for the event.

“Just a moment,” you said and read the message. You didn’t frown, didn’t react, there was no need to, you just read the message detailing the time and place for the next fight. You smiled, walking over to Hugh and putting an arm around his shoulders, confusing him, at least before you showed him the message.

“Y/N,” he began but you just grinned, blocking Davis’s number right in front of Hugh.

“I’m done,” you told him and the grin on his face made it even more worth it as he ruffled your hair and pulled you in for a hug.

“That’s the way! Lunch is on me, we’re going out to treat ourselves, call Barbara and tell her to be ready!” and with your spirits lifted and actual excitement in the air you were ready to begin the rehearsal. “I need to call Deb really quick, she’ll be really happy to hear this!” and she would be. She was a lot more understanding than you probably deserved her to be, and you knew this would mean a lot to her as well.

Sure, you weren’t all that close to her or Hugh’s kids, you knew them well, and you were happy to spend time with them, but the bond between you and the three of them wasn’t as strong as it was between you and Hugh. Still, they cared enough to be genuinely happy over this decision.

~X~

The last thing Jenna expected to happen two weeks after you left her home was to suddenly get a message from an unknown number, and she probably would have ignored it, if the person sending the message didn't also send a photo of you, your best friend, who was taking the photo, and Hugh Jackman sitting at a table having a lunch. “What the hell?” she muttered, more than a little confused. Minutes later a message came through. ‘That was just to get your attention. I'm Barbara, by the way, can I call you?’ The message read and instead of replying Jenna just called the girl herself, even if it was it was a bit nerve wracking to just randomly call someone she didn’t know.

Still, this was your best friend. And Jenna figured she could have that much freedom to just go ahead and call the girl.

“Oh my God, you have no idea the hoops I went through to get your number. It would have been a lot easier if that dumbass who happens to be my best friend just gave me your number,” was the first thing Barbara said and Jenna wasn't sure whether to laugh or just ask what the hoops she had to go through. Either way, she got to the impression that the girl would tell her regardless. “Get this, so, I couldn't crack her password. It really isn’t my birthday. Shame on Y/N,” Jenna already liked the dry sarcasm in Barbara’s tone. “Meaning, I had to make this elaborate plan where I went and began texting anyone who I thought might be able to help me out. So, your stylist, your mother your co-stars from Scream, yeah I went through a lot of proving who I am and finally getting your number, because damn it's difficult to get celebrity numbers,” Barbara concluded her tale with a deep breath, as she somehow managed to say all that without once taking a breath in.

Frankly, it was impressive that she even managed to get Jenna’s number. Jenna knew for a fact that her mother got tons of messages every day, each one asking for the same thing Barbara did. “You could have just asked Y/N you know,” she replied, and it really should have been that easy, or maybe Barbara just loved having a challenge in her life.

“That would have spoiled the surprise,” there was a hints of mischievousness in Barbara’s tone.

Jenna raised an eyebrow at that. Well, she was definitely down for surprising you, especially if it meant she would get to see you. “I'm listening,” Jenna all of a sudden felt like she was a part of some hidden plot, a secret only her and your best friend were in on, related to you and she was quite excited about it.

Barbara cheered, excited and probably very happy that things were going according to her plan. “Hear me out, Y/N and Hugh are participating in this charity event,” of course you were. Her lovely woman. “And I figured you might want to drop by and watch her give her first and potentially only live performance in a theatre?” how was that even a question? It was a chance to watch you perform, there was only one answer to that.

“Are you kidding me? I absolutely am coming! When and where?” that was all Jenna needed to know. Come hell or high water and even if it meant missing out on spending the holidays with her family she would go and watch you.

~X~

The day of the event Jenna took a flight from LA to Denver to meet up with Barbara in secret. Was it kind of weird? Meeting up with the same girl that made her rather jealous when you called her ‘babe’ behind your back? Yes, but she knew it would be worth it. She was in front of the theatre exactly 10 minutes before the event would start. The two of them were supposed to go inside and take their seats, not at the front of the crowd, but a bit further back so you wouldn't notice them right away. The plan was simple, Jenna would watch you in secret, dressed in a bit of a disguise, which was basically just a scarf, and then when you and Hugh finished her and Barbara would come and congratulate you.

Thinking about it now, maybe it wasn’t the smartest idea. Maybe you would look at Barbara if you felt nervous, and then you would recognize Jenna, and the surprise would be ruined. But it was too late to fix things now.

She spotted Barbara waiting for her in front of the theater and she had to admit the girl really was stunningly beautiful. Good thing she was straight, or Jenna would be feeling quite jealous. At that moment Barber noticed her and actually nodded in approval.

“You know, I've seen the pictures, but you look even more beautiful in person. No wonder Y/N is smitten with you,” ah, right, there it was. The teasing. You did mention Barbara was prone to teasing you, so this was what you meant when wasn't it? Not even a ‘hi, nice to meet you.’ No, it was right to teasing.

“She is?” Jenna asked trying to stop her mind from wandering off to all the times you nearly kissed and all the inappropriate thoughts and the dreams she had with you at the center of them. As well as to try and deflect, and maybe try to pretend there wasn’t anything more than friendship between you. She wasn’t blind, she could see you wanted more just as much as she did, but maybe, just maybe, it was still a bit too early.

Who was she kidding? After spending the night with you at her parents’ house she’s been missing you even more. She could deny it all she wanted, but a part of her knew that everything was falling into place for both of you to just take the risk. Spending the night at your place, hopefully alone, after everything, celebrating a successful live performance.

“You're blushing,” Barbara noticed before Jenna even figured it out herself, and it only made her blush more pronounced. “She absolutely is, by the way. She keeps wearing that ring like it's her lucky charm. Hell, she’s wearing it tonight as well,” that made Jenna smile.

The idea that you were wearing her ring around your neck made her heart beat faster. You were wearing it like a badge of honor, and, in another way wearing it as the declaration that there was something going on between you, that she was kind of staking her claim by marking you with her ring. It didn't cross her mind when she gave it to you, but now that she thought about it, it kind of was like that.

Barbara smiled. “Come on let's go inside. I think they are the last ones, but we should still get to our seats in time,” Barbara led her inside knowing the theater a lot better than she did since this was basically her first time in this theater.

From what she found out on the advertisement for the event, the charity was organized for the sake of rebuilding an old children's hospital and of course you, being the softy that you were, accepted. Just another reason to add to the list of reasons why she loved you. That being said, she had no idea what you and Hugh prepared for the night and from the looks of it neither did Barbara. For now, she would have fun with the rest of the event.

And she has fun! For roughly seventy-five minutes the performance was filled with various kinds of entertainment. Some people were singing, some were doing dance routines, some chose to go for usual theatre plays, only fit for the time frame given to them, some were showing impressive gymnastic skills choreographed to look more like a dance. And Jenna quite enjoyed herself, admiring the guts it took to perform live in front of an audience. and then an announcer came out just like he did between every act.

“Give it up for Logan reunion people, Hugh Jackman and Y/N L/N!” he exclaimed, and the crowd cheered as you quickly ran out pulling him aside.

“We're not ready, Hugh's not here,” you whispered but the announcer’s mic was still on, and the entire theater heard you say that. You looked like you were panicking, and it actually took Jenna's mind off of how absolutely stunning that black suit looked on you. You were dressed in all black, down to gloves! Not a hint of color to be seen, and while it was a bit unusual not to break all that black with something it looked really good on you.

“It's a closing act we can't move it! Why isn't he here?” the announcer asked frantically, and you just looked at him apologetically.

“Look there's nothing I can do. The show is already ending, they can just go home,” you suggested completely serious. Jenna glanced at Barbara, only to see she was just as confused as Jenna was.

“This is a serious event, now go out there and improvise something,” the announcer basically ordered you as he pointed toward the center of the stage, and you just sighed, taking the microphone and taking your spot on the stage.

“Right. Mistakes were made tonight, I'm sorry to announce that Hugh’s car got jacked, man. Uf, that was a lame joke. Well, you know what, after that start whatever I say after this will only sound better,” you said, walking along the stage just talking to the crowd and it got them to laugh. It was not the usual Hugh Jackman joke people used so there was a sense of freshness in it. And it was working.

You pulled out one of the chairs that was set up for you and Hugh for what Jenna guessed was a more subdued character-driven driven performance. Perhaps Jenna would never know, unless you began complaining about it later tonight, and you probably would. And you would have every right to complain considering Hugh wasn't here and you were alone on the stage in front of all the people that expected the two of you to show up.

You sat it down on the chair and dramatically hung your head back while tugging at your tie and sighed before bringing the microphone up to your lips. “Mistakes. We've all made them, you know? But this one might just be the biggest one I ever made. Here I am, replacing Hugh Jackman once again, like we all don’t already know how attached people get to their superheroes. I’m telling you, whoever thought there would be an X-23 movie continuing the franchise, better think twice. I have better chances doing that New Zealand movie Hugh gave up on, since there was no need to downsize everything.” you said and got up. “Most of you didn’t get that last one, and that’s perfectly fine. I don’t know what I’m doing either.”

You weren't even angry over this, just resigned to your fate as you got up and walked over to the center of the stage. Apparently, you've taken enough time to think of something. “See, if I could do this day all over again, I would not be wearing this tie. I'm telling you, it's really tight around my neck,” you tucked a finger underneath the tie and pulled, loosening it up a bit. “There’s not even a point, I’m in all black anyway,” you said, exasperated as people laughed, mostly at the way you were delivering the lines. “Other than that, I'd do this all over again. It's for a good cause, granted, it’s sad that we got to that point, but you know how things go. More often than not you don't notice things went wrong until it's too late,” people laughed again. “Yeah! And I’ll prove it to you!” you pointed at a random person in the crowd. “Say, have you ever had your heart broken?” you asked and the woman you pointed at nodded.

And Jenna just watched, mesmerized. You looked like you were comfortable doing this.

“Don’t you hate when that happens? There you are,” you spread your arm and turned slightly away from the crowd. “Thinking you’ve got it all figured out, you’re over it, but then you go into a car with someone, and you just realize you've made a mistake,” where the hell were you going with that one? “Just as you get comfortable for hours long ride, all of a sudden here comes piano followed by: I heard that you're settled down, that you found a girl and you're married now,” you actually sand really well. You weren’t Adele, but damn, Jenna wouldn’t mind listening to you singing more often. “And you’re reminded that the one driving you is that one friend that is obsessed with Adele and that's all you'll be listening to for the rest of the car ride. Love songs! No rock, no metal, no punk, or jazz, and you’re just hoping the shuffle will take some pity on you and you’ll get lucky to get Skyfall more than once!”

The laughter filled the theatre and you paused, letting it pass.

“It's mistakes like that, you know? It's the tiny things like a pebble that got stuck in your shoe and you can't get it out because it's inappropriate. And at that point you just hear alarms going off in your brain. It’s like a scene from an over the top action movie, you know the ones I’m talking about. Alarms blaring, red lights all around the main character, and that one voice going: 1 minute until total annihilation, but you're committed to it. You will make it work, damn it! You will push on with the Pebble in your shoe if that's the last thing you do!” and you were really getting into it, talking like an aggressively motivational coach trying to get people pumped. “It's like getting a role and thinking ‘good I don't have many lines, I can do this!’ and then three days in your voice is gone and your throat hurts because you've been screaming your heart out like it gives you special powers or something. Seriously, was I filming Logan or dubbing Dragon Ball Z?”

You went and sat down at the corner of the stage feet kind of dangling there as the crowd laughed and you nodded a few times. And then it happened, the stage lit up, the curtains moved to the side and in walked Hugh Jackman, dressed all in white as opposed to your all black suit, and it was clear by now that all of this was planned, and Hugh wasn’t late at all.

And the crowd went wild when they saw him. “See, that’s why I told you that X-23 joke would work,” you laughed and walked over to him, your microphone left behind at the edge of the stage, and since they could all still hear you Jenna figured you and Hugh had mics on your collars.

You went and stood slightly further back than Hugh, as only one spotlight remained on, the one on Hugh, and you were strangely standing right where his shadow was.

As Hugh walked closer to the end of the stage you followed him, perfectly replicating his movement, down to the slight sway of his hands. “Hello everyone, it’s wonderful seeing this many people gathering for a cause like this,” he stood there, confident, with his arms spread to greet the crowd, and you were actually moving at the same time as he was.

Hugh turned to look at you, and you looked back. “Y/N?” he sounded confused.

The spotlight on Hugh flickered for a moment and then got turned off entirely, only for one on the opposite side to be turned on, and in the brief moment it took the lights to switch you were on Hugh’s other side. “I’m just a shadow of the man you used to be,” you lamented, shadowing Hugh as he raised turned around to look at you and then scoffed. He raised his hand and snapped his fingers, and the upbeat music started.

He spun around, beginning to dance, and you did it all at the same time, with the same grace and rhythm Hugh had. And Jenna just watched, a smile on her face as the dance got progressively more complicated and even somewhat ridiculous. Hugh abruptly stopped, both of you breathing a bit heavily from the dancing, and looked back at you, frowning when you looked in the same direction he was looking at. “Look at me,” he demanded.

“Not how shadows work,” you corrected him, doing the same movement as he did as he silently directed the people controlling the spotlight to move them. You moved along with the lights, and raised your hand with Hugh when it looked like you were now face to face, with the light on Hugh’s back, but then you just turned your back to Hugh.

“Come on!” he exclaimed.

“I’m a shadow, not a mirror,” you reminded him.

“I see how it is,” the lights moved once more, and he began walking back, but the way light was shining on him made his shadow longer, meaning you were walking forward, following the path of the shadow right to the edge of the stage, and Hugh began taking the next step, thus your foot hovered over the stage.

And the lights went off once more, and when the lights came back you were nowhere to be seen as Hugh leaned against a cardboard wall, light shining on him, and no shadow in sight. “I’m safe,” he let out a sigh of relief and then the wall fell with a loud thud, and you were there, right behind it. Hugh hung his head and just accepted it as the two of you began walking off the stage, and then the lights went off again.

“Come on, man! Let me exist!” you shouted and when the lights came back you and Hugh were back on the stage, no longer performing as you just bowed to the crowd and curtains dropped.

And Jenna? She was astonished, completely swept off her feet by what you and Hugh just did.

“They were amazing,” Barbara said and frankly, Jenna couldn’t agree more, you truly were amazing.

~X~

You and Hugh just finished talking to the even organizers, finalizing your own donations to the cause, all that was left to do was find Barbara and go to your place to celebrate a successful night. You were a bit disappointed Jenna couldn’t make it, but Christmas was yesterday, so you understood. She wanted to spend time with her family, even though she didn’t put it like that, and you were honestly just happy that she was having fun. She did tell you to call her after the performance, so, instead of calling Barbara you went and called Jenna.

Only to hear ringing close to the doors and then saw Jenna reject your call. “What the fuck?” you looked at your phone and then at Hugh, who was equally puzzled.

“How was I supposed to know she’d call me right away?” that sounded like Jenna! You jumped to your feet, happy that you were finally out of that suit, and went to the doors.

“How could you not know?” and that was Barbara. “Why wasn’t your phone on silent?”

“I was excited, okay? I forgot,” that was definitely Jenna’s voice, and you opened the doors, seeing the two of them approaching while almost childishly going back and forth about Jenna not putting her phone on silent.

“If I knew about the surprise I could have stopped that unfortunate timing,” Hugh chimed in and Barbara slapped her forehead.

“I should have thought of that!” she berated herself, but you and Jenna just looked at each other.

Jenna smiled, her gaze dropping down to her ring, hanging around your neck, visible for anyone paying attention to see it. At least for now, while you were in the back room, getting ready to go back home. “Surprise,” Jenna spoke softly and the two of you hugged.

You lifted her up, and she immediately kissed your cheek as she hugged you back and buried her face in your neck. “It’s so good to see you, Jen,” you whispered, now feeling like this might just be one of the best nights in your entire life.

“I missed you,” her voice came out muffled, and you had to hold back so you wouldn’t just kiss her right then and there. You wanted to do it, so much it almost hurt. Not here though, you couldn’t do it here. She deserved a better spot for your first kiss, someplace better than a backroom of a theatre.

Barbara clearing her throat made you roll your eyes as you gently lowered Jenna down. And that was another reason why you had to restrain yourself. Because Barbara would never let you or Jenna hear the end of it. It would haunt you for the rest of your lives that you couldn’t hold back at least until you were alone.

And even if you could somehow ignore both of those reasons, you couldn’t do it until you were completely honest with Jenna. She had to know what you were involved in.

Jenna blushed and looked to the side, before regaining her composure and turning to Hugh. “It’s an honor to meet you, Mr. Jackman,” she said, offering her hand to him, and you had to hold back your laugh, because that might make Jenna uncomfortable.

“Please, Hugh is fine. The honor is mine, Jenna, I’ve heard so much about you,” Hugh assured her as he accepted her hand.

“Mr. Jackman. That’s hilarious,” you patted Jenna on the back and finally burst out laughing at the ridiculousness of that.

“Oh, no, you don’t. You don’t get to divert attention, Y/N,” Barbara said and smirked, and you tried to shake your head, pleading silently for Barbara to have mercy. “Hugh is being gentle. We’ve heard too much about you. At this point we’ve heard so much about you it turned into a parasocial relationship,” someone kill you, right now.

“That’s one way of putting it. You’ve got our Y/N here, quite enamored with you, miss Ortega,” Hugh flung his arm around your shoulders and pulled you closer.

This was your life right now. At least Aliyah and Enrique weren’t here as well. You and Jenna might not survive it.

You noticed Jenna getting more embarrassed by the second. “Okay, okay, you’ve had your fun, let’s get out of here,” you ushered them all to finally leave so you could go back to your apartment.

~X~

Jenna supposed she couldn’t really blame everyone for teasing the two of you. In reality it wasn’t just their way of showing love, it was kind of warranted because, well, if Aliyah was sitting on the sofa, pretty much cuddling with some guy, while claiming he was just a friend, Jenna would probably tease her too. And that was the position Jenna was in. The four of you went to your apartment, and Jenna found herself sitting on the sofa and leaning on your side as you had your arm around her shoulders, and to make things even more obvious, Jenna’s arm was around your waist, up until five minutes ago.

The teasing was put on pause for now, though. As you all focused on eating a somewhat late dinner. You and Hugh didn’t get the chance to eat before the charity event, so you were both hungry. If she wasn’t eating Jenna would still have her arm around you, while you were just eating a burrito, so you could do it with one hand.

It was the first time Jenna was in your apartment, and she was taking it in. It looked kind of empty. No pictures, no decorations, nothing. Just furniture, and even that showed how few people came here. The table in the kitchen? In theory four people could eat there, but it really was only big enough for three people to be comfortable, thus the four of you ate in the living room. You did have an extra bedroom, showing that Barbara and Hugh did sleep over often enough for you to consider that a necessity, but barely anything else in the apartment showed you enjoyed living here. It was like this wasn’t a home, but just a place to live in for you, with no emotional attachment. Sure, you were renting it, but this level of detachment was something she definitely wasn’t used to.

There were some books and movies in the apartment, but that was as far as personal touch went. You didn’t even have something as small as a magnet on the fridge, or some tiny decoration on the table in the living room. Hell, Jenna was willing to swear you didn’t even own a flower vase with how bare everything was.

New Year was right around the corner, and that only made the emptiness of the apartment speak even louder.

She glanced at you, remembering how you forgot about Thanksgiving, it made sense now. Of course you would forget something that you didn’t even consider worth putting effort into celebrating, did you? She leaned a bit closer to you, wondering just how living in a place as empty as this one would affect you. Your inability to open up about what was causing you pain certainly made more sense now that she saw the place you lived in.

“You okay?” you whispered softly and she nodded, smiling slightly. You were this warm and attentive despite living in a place as cold as this one. She missed the smiles, genuine smiles, with no intentions of teasing, on both Hugh and Barbara’s faces.

~X~

Jenna would be spending the night, that much was clear, and you found yourself wondering how exactly to approach this. Was it too bold to assume she’d sleep in your bed? With how many nights you spent together it seemed like a natural conclusion to make, but you also didn’t want to make her potentially uncomfortable.

But would getting the spare bedroom ready make it seem like you didn’t want her to spend the night with you? You’d just ask her when Barbara and Hugh leave. Either way you needed another pillow and another blanket because Jenna spent that night at her parents’ house covered in blankets from head to toe, even with the heating on. You weren’t as bothered by cold and she liked warmth, and you would definitely need to add one more blanket to your bed because of that.

You were just pulling a blanket out when Barbara came in and sat down on your bed. “Something’s on your mind,” you said, noticing she became a bit more silent than she usually was as the night went on. It was almost unnoticeable, but you knew her better than perhaps anyone.

“Jenna doesn’t know yet, does she?” and Barbara didn’t even need to clarify what she meant. You understood.

“No, I haven’t told her yet. I don’t know how,” and it weighed heavily on your mind. For the first time since you started fighting you skipped two fights in a row, while still being in Denver. You blocked Davis, you quit. You were adamant that you weren’t going to go back there. Regardless of that, those fights were a big part of the last four years, so big in fact, that hiding that information from Jenna felt like you were betraying her.

You loved her, so much so that you were well-aware that you quitting fights had a lot to do with her. Was it wrong? To make a decision like that because of someone other than yourself? In a way, but you were so far gone that nothing else could probably push you into that decision.

“I get it, I really do, but she deserves to know. No, it’s not just that, you can’t risk hurting her down the line by hiding that,” Barbara sighed, understanding you, but also pushing you to do what was right. What else could you do? Wait and start a relationship with Jenna. Something both of you clearly wanted. And then what? Have the truth come out weeks, months, or even worse, years later and have her lose all of her trust in you?

You didn’t pay attention to the doors opening behind you, you just scoffed, getting somewhat frustrated by the conversation. “I know, Barb, but I need the right moment, I can’t just sit down next to her and go: Hey, Jen, I’ve been fighting in this underground fight club,” you said and were about to continue, but Barbara suddenly froze. and your eyes widened. Why would she? 'No,' that single word went through your mind as you turned around and saw Jenna standing there. Shocked and confused.

“Shit,” Barbara cursed. This was the worst way for Jenna to find out, well, maybe aside from walking in on you all bruised up after a fight. But seeing as you quit fighting, this really was the worse way for her to find out.

"Jen," you tried to speak, but you could barely say her nickname, let alone form a proper sentence.

The look on her face damn near broke you into millions of pieces. Shattering you beyond repair in an instant. "You fight?" she asked.

You looked at her, at the heart-broken expression on her face, at the silent plea not for you to explain, but to tell her you were lying. And you looked down, recognizing that look. You saw it on Barbara's family, only to a lesser extent. "I do," you replied. "In a fight club, barely any rules, might as well be an organized street fight," you said bitterly.

Jenna looked ready to cry, as if her entire world came crashing down in that instance. "What?" she asked, but as you took a step closer, she took a step back. "Please, no. You're lying," tears freely flowed from her eyes now.

You just shook your head, seeing she wasn't comfortable. There seemed to be a rift between you now. A chasm so deep and wide that your words wouldn't reach her.

"I need to go," Jenna said, and your eyes met once more, a silent acceptance of the end in both her and your own eyes. She turned around and you watched as she left, and you felt pain consuming you, threatening to overwhelm you.

"Go after her!" Barbara tried to push you, and then to pull your hand to get you to move, but she just wasn't strong enough. She cried out in frustration and realized you wouldn't move as hard as she tried. "Wait, Jenna," Barbara went after her as Hugh came into your room, confused.

"Y/N?" he asked, but the look on your face told him everything.

"She knows," you shook, on the verge of crying, and you would have collapsed onto the floor if he didn't catch you in time. “She knows, Hugh,” why couldn’t you just let it all out? Why was it so difficult to just cry your heart out?

“Give her time, okay? You’ll be fine, just let it out,” he tried to encourage you, hugging you tightly and you clung to him as if your life depended on it. In some way, maybe it did.

“I can’t,” you gasped, afraid to fall apart, afraid that you wouldn’t be able to put yourself back together if you let it happen.

You could feel Hugh’s jaw tightening next to you. “Fall apart, I’ll be right here with you to pick up the pieces,” he promised, and you shattered like a broken mirror that could never be mended back together, feeling like all the pieces fell through your hands, only to be caught by the man who’s been treating you like his own child ever since you met him.

~X~

This wasn’t happening. This had to be some nightmare, a horrible dream she was just about to wake up from. Jenna leaned against the wall of your apartment building, right next to the entrance, her face buried in her hands as she grappled with the knowledge she just gained.

You fought. You actively went and sought out fights in underground fight clubs.

It all suddenly made sense. That night when you were about to leave, back while you were still filming Scream, and then your occasional wincing when you visited her. You weren’t humoring her, you were actually in pain.

You were involved in something like that.

Jenna felt sick. She felt like vomiting. She felt nauseous, and then hands grabbed her and she looked up, startled, expecting to see you, only to be met with Barbara instead.

“Hey, look, I’m not Y/N, I don’t know how to deal with a panic attack,” that was reassuring. And it also frightened her. Did she look like she was about to have a panic attack?

“Mentioning her definitely isn’t helping me,” she nearly pushed the girl away, wishing she could just be home right now, wishing she could be with someone she could trust completely, and not… you didn’t lie to her, but this was a huge thing to hide.

Barbara’s eyes softened at that, and she even managed to smile a bit as she removed her hands from Jenna’s arms. “Please, at least let me tell you what I know,” she said, and Jenna had no idea how that would possibly help. What reason could excuse not only putting yourself in harm’s way, but also hurting other people.

“I don’t think anything could excuse choosing violence,” especially as dangerous as the one you were involved in. Martial arts sports had rules, and people still died. She remembered countless times her mother came back home, shaken up by someone as young as one of her children getting into a barfight and losing their life or being seriously injured, and her dad had even more of those stories. She was frightened.

Barbara shook her head. “It’s not as simple as you think,” how? What could possibly make her go from absolutely terrified that participating in that willingly. You were actually willing to travel who knows how far, potentially be absent for several days, just to fight, knowing you could get injured, or worse. Not only was it dangerous, but it was also ridiculously irresponsible toward the rest of the cast, as you may have gotten injured to the point of delaying the filming. “Jenna, please, you love her. At least hear me out if you won’t hear her out,” Barbara pleaded.

Jenna laughed bitterly. “I don’t know her. I fell in love with a strong, yet gentle woman, who I thought could never hurt someone. And now I’m finding out she hurts people for money,” tears streamed down her face freely.

“She needed money, Jenna, come on, there’s a small coffee shop nearby, at least let me tell you the basics,” she was desperate, and sure, why not. Might as well get the full picture, humor the reasons that could never be enough to excuse you.

“Fine, whatever,” she sighed, following Barbara into a small coffee shop that would give them enough privacy. Frankly, Jenna wasn’t in the mood for a coffee, more for something stronger, anything to numb what she was feeling right now. She still ordered whatever Barbara ordered, not even properly paying attention. “Why does she fight?”

“It started four years ago,” Barbara began, and Jenna’s eyes widened for a moment. The remark that it’s been going on for so long and that it was all she needed to hear was silenced by the realization of what happened back then.

“To get over the deaths of her parents?” she asked, still disturbed by the idea of you fighting, but a tiny bit more sympathetic. Why couldn’t you just get a better coping mechanism?

Barbara shook her head. “It happened in early September,” that didn’t match what you told her. You said your parents died in December. “A truck driver drove into a restaurant Y/N was in with her parents, it would have been a mercy for everyone if they died right then and there, but they survived. Only they were comatose, on life support and in need on of several surgeries, and even then, their chances were slim.”

Jenna listened closely, horrified that you had to go through that. She knew there was an accident, she never even imagined the horror you must have went through lasting for months.

“Y/N decided to take them to Mayo Clinic in Rochester, believing that would improve their chances,” Jenna knew well enough what that would mean, her mom was a nurse, after all. You would have to transport them probably from Denver to Rochester, and as far as she was aware you wouldn’t be able to get aid for bills, seeing as most states didn’t have that deal with Mayo Clinic.

“Shit,” she lowered her head, seeing where this was going.

“I don’t know when exactly the fighting began. She used up all the savings, sold her family’s apartment with the help of a family lawyer, though for a lot cheaper in order to get the money quickly, but she had no job. You know how acting works, even if she auditioned a lot of time would pass before she would get paid, money ran out and somehow, she found herself in those fights. To this day I don’t know why she didn’t just borrow money from Hugh, he actually had no idea what was going on until the end of November,” Barbara explained, and Jenna just sank into her seat.

“God, that’s,” she couldn’t even find the right words. She just imagined Aliyah or Markus, who were now about the same age as you were back then, in that same position and she could swear she heard her heart breaking.

“She’s still the same person you got to know. I don’t know why she keeps on fighting, Jenna, I thought she had a debt, or that there was a blackmail involved of some sort, but she’s going back there of her own free will. I don’t know how to reach her and get her to explain that,” by now both of them were crying as Jenna buried her face in her hands.

It was horrible. Everything about this. The circumstances that led you down that path, your inability to stop after there was no purpose behind the fights. She could understand every single fight you went to in order to try and save your parents’ lives. But this? Now? She couldn’t understand that.

“I need time to think,” Jenna eventually said, and Barbara nodded.

“That’s all I’m asking. That you don’t cut her off without at least knowing why she began fighting in the first place,” Barbara said softly, and for a moment Jenna thought Barbara might have been more understanding of her than she deserved. You were Barbara’s best friend after all.

“I’m not,” she almost said she wouldn’t cut you off, but realized it was too soon to promise something like that. “We both need space away from one another,” there was resignation on Barbara’s face when she said that, as if she just accepted it, as if she was no longer going to argue.

“I get it,” she really seemed to get it. For a brief moment Jenna thought that maybe, just maybe, the same thoughts were once upon a time crossing Barbara’s mind as well. “Coffee is on me. Might be our last,” she said with a sense of finality in her tone that Jenna wasn’t ready or willing to argue against.

That was also a possibility. All things considered.

Even if she could excuse you, accept this about you, her parents would never be able to do the same.

And between you and her family… it wasn’t a choice she wanted to make, but it was clear to her what she would choose.

Taglist: @lilbitdepressed27 @freakshow2501 @osnapitzmel1 @belatrixdragon @ijustlovemaths

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[samkerrworshipper]

The Last Time (exile pt.2) | Alexia Putellas x Reader

part 2 to exile

summary: Alexia tries to apologise to r after what happened at the club… another songfic based off the song the last time by taylor swift

warnings: none besides a whole lot of angst :(

Alexia knows a lot of things. 

She knows how to play soccer, she knows how to speak English, Spanish and Catalan, she knows how to make some of the best paella in Barcelona thanks to her mother, she knows how to dance, she knows how to have some fun. 

She also knows that you are the best thing that has ever happened to her. 

It’s a fact, because Alexia was a mess before you, fresh out of a break up with Jenni, who she never really saw herself staying with but also never saw herself breaking up with. 

There are some people like Alexia thinks, people that you love, but they aren’t your person. Sometimes those relationships are the ones that hurt the most. 

Alexia knows that she’s fucked up more than she ever has before, she’s stripped you of your dignity and the respect in your relationship. 

Eli told her as much, her mother taking your side as Alexia sobbed into her phone explaining just how badly she had messed up and how she had to fix it. 

Alexia knew she was right, but she was also frightfully aware that she was fairly intoxicated, and she didn’t want to ruin your night anymore by showing up at your doorstep. 

So, she timidly stepped back into the bar, taking in how a lot of the team had exited the dance floor, Jenni appeared to be gone, something Alexia was grateful for. 

Before she could properly step into the space, Mapi was coming out of nowhere and clutching onto Alexia’s forearm, dragging her out of the club as quickly as humanly possible. 

Before Alexia could ask any questions, all the air was exiting her lungs as she was slammed up against the brick wall of the outside of the club. 

Mapi’s arm had come to rest flat against her chest, pressing her directly into the cold concrete. 

“What the actual fuck was that.”

Mapi’s voice is seething, and sure, she’s Alexia’s best friend in the entire world, but you are also Ingrid and Mapi’s adoptive daughter, when it comes to protecting you they do it fiercely. 

Alexia can’t do much besides burst into tears, she feels weak, stupidly weak, she doesn’t deserve to be crying, not after what she just did to you, but she can’t help herself, everything is too much. 

Mapi eases up a little bit, her arm falling from Alexia’s chest, down to her stomach and bringing her in for a hug, it’s clear that Alexia is pretty tipsy, and she decides she’ll save the yelling for when she can fully appreciate it. 

“C’mon, let’s get you home, Ingrid’s sober, she’ll drive.”

Alexia looks behind Mapi, to find her girlfriend lingering behind the two of them, a deep frown of anger and disappointment on her face. 

It makes Alexia sick to her stomach, like she’s been punched in the gut repetitively, she probably deserves it, especially after what she just did to you. 

She allows Mapi to lead her to a car, her body crumpling into the backseat, the thoughts of the last hour circling in her mind repetitively, like a record stuck on replay. 

Drunken, heartbroken Alexia forces herself to make a promise in the back of Mapi’s car, this is the last time. 

The last time she puts her feelings above yours, the last time she thinks without acting, the last time she disregards your relationship with such ease. 

If for some miracle, she can manage to claw her way back into your life, then she promises herself she will never let this happen again, this will be the first and only time that she goes behind your back, this will be the last time that she treats you like you aren’t enough, this is the last night she will lie to you. 

It seems empty, in the context, but Alexia doesn’t care, as far as she’s concerned this is rock bottom, this is the worst thing that has ever happened to her, and she’ll be damned if she lets you slip out of her hands without putting up a fight. 

Never again will she allow you to push your feelings under the rug, she is never going to hide all of your problems away like they don’t matter. 

When they do make it back to Ingrid and Mapi’s apartment, it’s clear Ingrid is fuming, Alexia can’t really blame her. 

So Mapi is on clean up, dragging a zoned out Alexia into the apartment, throwing her into the guest bedroom with some Advil and water on her bedside. 

It’s the bare minimum, it’s what Alexia deserves, Mapi doesn’t comfort her, she just gives her the look, the ‘you’ve seriously fucked up and I won’t lie to you about it’ look, it’s a look that previously Alexia had used on Mapi, before Ingrid, before Mapi got her shit together. 

She leaves Alexia to wallow in her hangover and depression, deep down Mapi knows it’s what's best, even if it hurts her, she knows from personal experience that sometimes it’s best to hold yourself accountable for your actions, and she knows Alexia will. 

Alexia manages to tug her clothes off, the items harbouring memories that make Alexia gag, she manages to crawl into the unfamiliar sheets of the bed and tumble into an alcohol induced sleep. 

It’s not a good sleep, the kind of sleep where no matter how long you stay unconscious for, you seem like you are teetering on the edge of waking up again. 

It’s why Alexia can’t sleep anything past 6am, which is her normal wake up time, on every day but a Monday, Monday’s are the one day of the week where Alexia allows herself to sleep in, because typically the only thing that happens on a Monday is video review in the afternoon, but that had been cancelled because Jona had some family commitment. 

She crawls out of bed, finding a spare hoodie and shorts on the dresser in the room and tugging them on before walking into the living room. 

To her surprise, Ingrid is already sitting at the kitchen table, a steaming mug of coffee in her hands, Bagheera in her lap and a laptop sitting on the counter in front of her. 

“There is coffee in the pot.”

Ingrid’s voice is stiff, something so unusual for the brunette, normally she is all things warm and kind, it’s why Alexia believes she compliments Maria so well, she mellows out all of Mapi’s bluntness and contradictiveness. 

Alexia tiptoes over to the pot, pouring herself a cup and then tentatively taking a seat at the table after Ingrid eyeballed the seat beside her. 

She closes the laptop once Alexia has sat down, all of the Norwegians attention turning to Alexia, unfortunately. 

“What you did last night was quite frankly disgusting. Your wife, my best friend, has put seven years of her life into you, you fall on her for anything you like, everything in your relationship is her problem, and for whatever reason she puts up with it, I know if it was me I wouldn’t put up with an inch of it, but she does, because that's who she is. She was holding on to one thing, you give away every single part of you, but she had something, a little piece of hope and last night you took it away from her. In fact, you practically stomped on that hope right in front of her. You don’t deserve her, you don’t deserve to walk on the ground that she does. I don’t care if you're my captain, or that you are La Reina or Alexia Putellas,  you do not get to treat the person that loves you very most in the world like a piece of lint on a sweater. You dust her off at every single opportunity you can, and she just sits by, allowing you to, because she loves you, a lot more than you deserve.”

Alexia tries to say something, agree with Ingrid, because she does agree, everything Ingrid is saying is true, Ingrid stops her though, continuing her rant. 

“For whatever reason, one I do not understand, she loves you, she talks about you like you created the moon and the stars, you make her happier than anybody else. That is why I am telling you that you have to make this right. Fuck Jenni, fuck you, fuck your fucked up ways. You need to fix this because she is going to be broken if you just give up. If anyone deserves to have their heart broken it’s you, so I don’t care if you have to die for her, you owe her that for all of the shit that you’ve forced her to put up with over the years. Last night might have been the straw that broke the camel's back, but you’ve been disloyal in every single way besides cheating up until last night, and if you love her at all, you will make it right. Nobody deserves to be loved more than she does, and if you don’t prove to her that you love her then she will spend every minute left of her life on earth gutted about it.”

Ingrid’s words are cut throat, so brutal that it takes Alexia a few seconds to absorb them all. 

“Ingrid, she told me that she wanted a divorce, that she didn’t want to be married to a woman who broke vows, I can’t blatantly disregard her wants.”

Ingrid just rolled her eyes.

“Of course she doesn’t, so prove to her that you aren’t that woman, that it was a mistake and that it will never happen again, and I swear to every single god that exists that if it ever happens again, mark my words, you will be six feet under and nobody will be finding your body, understood?”

It’s a threat that normally Alexia would find humorous, but the way Ingrid says it makes Alexia fairly certain that the Norwegian is fairly serious. Ingrid is innocent, Ingrid is a sweetheart, Ingrid is kittens and all things sweet and nice, apparently until you hurt someone she loves. 

“Do you know where she is?”

Ingrid takes a deep sip from her coffee. 

“I talked to Keira and Lucy last night, they took her back to their apartment, said she was practically catatonic and refused to speak to them, just cried and sat on their couch with Narla.”

It’s a sad image, the pit of guilt in Alexia’s stomach only seems to continue to grow the more information she’s fed.

“They live two blocks away from here, right?”

Ingrid nods hesitantly, with the confirmation Alexia is shooting out of her seat, rushing towards the door of Mapi and Ingrid’s apartment, Ingrid is far to tired and fed up with the whole situation to try and stop her, even with the negative feeling that’s pooling up in her gut, she figures Alexia is a big girl though, and if she’s going to make time to atone for her sins there's no time like the present. 

Alexia’s fast paced walk is fueled by one thing: fear. 

Fear she’s lost you forever, fear she’s made the biggest mistake in her life, fear that one stupid fucking kiss could be the end of her life as she knows it. 

It doesn’t take her very long to navigate her way through the Barcelona streets to Lucy’s apartment, Alexia and Barcelona are practically synonymous. 

She grew up on these streets, she knows them better than anything in the world, she knows them better than she knows you.

Which almost makes her hurl, at what point did her wife, her lover, her heart become somebody that she doesn’t know, when did you stop becoming her priority?

Find myself at your door

Just like all those times before

I’m not sure how I got here

All roads, they lead me here

I imagine you are home

In your room, all alone

And you open your eyes into mine

Everything feels better

Alexia somehow finds her way to Keira and Lucy’s apartment, she’s been her hundreds of times, team bonding, dinners, movie nights, coffee catch ups. Lucy and Keira are also two people who you heavily rely on, often Alexia’s innately grateful for the two of them, because she can always trust that whilst the two of you are separated for national duties that you are in good company. 

She knocks on the door, powerful, unyielding, confident. All things that Alexia is definitely not feeling. 

She waits a maximum of three seconds, before she’s met with a frazzled looking Keira, who is still dressed in her pyjamas and looks like she hasn’t slept a single bit. 

“Leave.”

Keira’s voice is scratchy, dry and weirdly fearful. 

“I need to talk to my wife.”

Alexia doesn’t know why she uses the honorific, she hardly ever refers to you as anything but your name, but it's some sort of safety blanket for herself, a reminder that technically, according to a piece of paper the two of you are still married. 

“Alexia, leave, she doesn’t want to see you and I don’t want you to get hurt when my girlfriend finds out you are here.”

Alexia grimaces at the thought of Lucy, who she knows will have far less restraint then Ingrid and Maria when it comes to defending your honour. 

She relents though, Alexia has walked out the door one too many times, she knows it, and she won’t allow this time to be just another time that Alexia’s failed to show up for you. 

“Keira, I won’t leave until I get to see her.”

Keira rakes her hand through the roots of her hair. 

“Look, she’s been torn up about what happened all night, didn’t catch a wink of sleep, neither did Luce or I because we were so worried that if we left her she’d jump off our balcony or do something stupid. I’m sure you didn’t sleep well either, so how about you come back tomorrow or something, when she’s feeling up to it.”

Alexia pities Keira just a little bit, it’s Alexia’s fault that she looks like shit, everything is Alexia’s fault. 

“Keira, please, I just need to see her, I know I fucked up, trust me, nobody knows it more than I do, I just need to see her, and apologise. You can kick me out afterwards, just please, let me say my peace.”

Keira’s jaw sets, and for a moment Alexia sees a different side to Keira, it scares her just a little bit. 

“I hardly think you deserve any of her time, you don’t deserve her time or forgiveness.”

Alexia is about to agree with Keira, but the both of them are silenced by a voice. 

“Kei, let her say what she has to say.”

And right before your eyes 

I’m breaking

No past, no reasons

Just you and I

Just the sight of you brings tears to Alexia’s eyes. 

There are big, puffy, red bags underneath your eyes, your makeup from the previous night smeared and mixed all over yourself.

You look so incredibly raw, like a piece of art, and it pains Alexia so much that she’s the reason for all of your pain, that her fucked up decisions have made you so broken. 

“We’re waiting.”

Alexia’s brain snaps into order, all of her thoughts circulating as she tries to articulate what she needs to say to you. 

This is the last time I’m asking you this

Put my name at the top of your list

This is the last time I’m asking you why

You break my heart in the blink of an eye, eye, eye 

You find yourself at my door

Like all those times before

“Please, I know I fucked up last night. And it’s not the first time that I’ve put myself above you in the last little while, and you deserve better, you deserve so much better. But I do love you, I loved you enough to marry you, I loved you enough to make you a Putellas and I don’t regret that. I don’t love Jenni, I don’t want her, I don’t think about her like I think about you. I know, I broke your heart, a heart that I promised I would protect, that I’d care for. I know that I’ve asked too much of you, asked for you to forgive me of too much, you deserve better. Please, let this be the last time, I promise, I swear on my mothers life, that if you give me a chance, I will make this the last time. I know we’ve been here hundreds of times, and you have no reason to trust me, but please, give me a chance.”

Your facial expression doesn’t change, it’s spacey, sort of like you’re on a different wavelength.

Alexia’s toes are scuffing against the doormat, her hand resting on the door frame as she looks at you, with tears and desperation in her eyes. 

“Little while? Alexia the last time you told me you loved me when it wasn’t for cameras or show was two years ago. When we took the trip to Ibiza before your break out season started, as soon as the award started rolling in, I didn’t matter, how could I? I didn’t marry La Reina, I married Alexia Putellas Segura, the woman who loved me, you aren’t that person anymore.”

You wear your best apology

But I was there to watch you leave

And all the times I let you in

Just for you to go again

Disappear when you come back 

Everything is better

“Please, Y/n/n.”

Your face is unwavering, and for once Alexia doesn’t feel weak for being the one breaking down, it feels deserved, considering how many times the tables have been turned and you’ve broken down in front of Alexia because of her words and actions. 

“No, you do not get to show up here with some perfect fucking apology to try and worm your way back into my life. It’s not fair Alexia Putellas, because you know I love you, you know that I would follow you to the ends of the earth, you know that I would give up every single part of myself for you. But I have watched you walk out the door so many times, and every single time I’ve let you back in, I’ve let you disappear whenever its been most convenient for you and act like everything is fine when you return. I put up with that, because I am a good fucking wife and I love you, more than is healthy. You are my everything, you are my world, and I would have died knowing you didn’t love me as much, because loving you was enough for me. But knowing that you loved Jenni enough to give her something so sacred to me, it felt like you ripped my heart out of my chest and cut it to pieces in front of my eyes. The worst part is, I still fucking love you, you could kill a hundred people or move to Antarctica and it wouldn’t matter, because I love you, unconditionally and it hurts. So please, for me, walk away, because if you don’t I’ll forgive you, and then you’ll worm your way back into my life, and it’ll hurt even more because I’ll be going against my beliefs and wishes.”

And right before your eyes

I’m aching 

Run fast, nowhere to hide

Just you and me

Suddenly, tears are dripping down Alexia’s face, it hurts so bad to hear what you are saying, it feels like she’s being stabbed. 

Having you hate Alexia is one thing, but having you love her but ask her to leave is the worst possible thing. 

Alexia wants to runa way from the door, to leave you, leave this awkward fucking situation which Keira is directly in the middle of, but she can’t, not when your staring at Alexia like it’s physically hurting you to do so. 

This is the last time I’m asking you this

Put my name at the top of your list

This is the last time I’m asking you why

You break my heart in the blink of an eye, eye, eye 

“Please just let this be the last time, let it be the last time I fuck up, let this be the last time I hurt you.”

Alexia’s voice is pleading, begging, hoping. 

“Sure, this is the last time you hurt me, this is the last time, because there won’t be any more times between us, we’re done Alexia.”

This is the last time you tell me I've got it wrong

This is the last time I say it's been you all along

This is the last time I let you in my door

This is the last time, I won't hurt you anymore

Alexia is balling now, big, wet, fat tears sloppily falling down her face as she processes the emotions and current conversation. 

“Alexia, it’s been you all along for me, and I was okay with that, even if it was painful, even if you could never reciprocate. But this is the last time I open my door to you, this is the last time you hurt me. So leave, please, don’t make this any harder than it has to be.”

Alexia’s feet feel rooted to the floor, her toes curling into the doormat below her feet. 

“Alexia, leave, before we call security.”

It’s Lucy’s bigger body, now shielding you from Alexia that sends the order, and before Alexia can say anything more, the door of the apartment is slammed in her face, and she’s left standing in front of a white door, with tears streaming down her face as she mourns her marriage that’s slipped out from under her, all because she was fucking stupid. 

[na0koz]

hiii i was wondering if you could write about toxic vi from arcane? <3

cw: mention of sex, ghosting, alcohol, arguing, wall punching, gaslighting, vi is just mean

hell yeah

i don’t think vi would be toxic in the way that i write jinx, like she wouldn’t be completely psychotic and obsessed, like she just wouldn’t be the best girlfriend, y’know.

she’d be veryyyy possessive but still refuses to put a label on your relationship. i don’t think she likes committing like that. but if she catches wind of someone else flirting with you, or you flirting with someone else then she will be having words. beats up the other person and maybe yells at you too.

she is so so mean. uses personal stuff you’ve told her against you all the time, purposefully to hurt you. she knows how to get under your skin and make you cry and she uses that skill to her advantage.

if you argue then she’ll storm off and come back a couple days later, sweet talking you trying to get you back while you stare at her with your arms folded over your chest. “please princess, you’re the only person i wanna be with, i need you.” kinda shit.

she does ghost you a lot though. she’s not reallyyyy sure how to do relationships ‘properly’ so she thinks it’s fine to disappear for a days or weeks and come back like nothing happened just because she ‘wasn’t feeling like a relationship’.

really fucks with your head a lot. acts like she didn’t say stuff when she definitely did. called you a slut once for pretty much no reason and then when you brought it up in a later argument, where she said you were “being stupid, baby” and she’d never say that about you because she loves you.

like i said earlier, she’s different to jinx in how they’re toxic. i guess the way to describe it would be that vi is actively toxic, because she argues and ghosts you and all that bs, while jinx is like secretly obsessed and crazy about you.

she never tells you anything. you probably started seeing each other as a result of a one night stand, so there wasn’t any like talking stage beforehand. she picked you up from a club and thought she wouldn’t mind seeing you again after she’d fucked you. but you guys barely talk properly, if you do then it’s you talking and her half-listening. you don’t know anything about her family or anything like that, nothing about her past.

she’s not that physical when she’s angry, but she has been and will be if she gets worked up enough. punches walls for sure. her apartment is so messy from her punching shit and throwing stuff. in a particularly messy argument you said something that just really rubbed her the wrong way. she punched the wall by your head as a result and made you cry. cue the sickly sweet, yet empty, comforts and apologies.

once ran into someone she knew while you were on a ‘date’ (going to a bar, making out in an alleyway, then fucking at her apartment), and introduced you as her girlfriend. you asked her about it, a smile on your face as you thought she had finally decided she wanted to seal the deal with you. she then burst your bubble saying that she “kind of had to” call you her girlfriend because you’re definitely more than friends, but you are not her girlfriend. she makes that very clear.

she did try to do something for your birthday, (doesn’t give a fuck about anniversaries) not very well though. she missed it by a couple of days and probably only knew about it from hearing it from a friend of yours. showed up to your door with some kind of ugly wilted flowers and a bottle of whiskey. she may have already popped the cork of the bottle and had some on her way.

her answer to everything is just sex, unfortunately. her idea of making up after an argument is just fucking you to make to forget how horrible she is, rather than actually apologising and talking with you.

basically, she fucks with you so bad, your friends hate her, you hate her (sometimes), she acts like she hates you but truthfully she is just terrified but the feeling that you give her. she is evil.

[girlboypersonthingy]

Can I request Vi, Jinx and Caitlyn trying to cheer up/apologize to their S/O after a nasty fight? I wonder what they would do to try and make it up to them.

AAAHHHH ANGSTY GIRLS ARE MY WEAKNESS 😩💔 As always, I am so grateful for the request! Also sorry this took so long… ENJOY~

VI 💘

Okay, she def said some mean shit to you. She’s good with her fists, but she has a sharp tongue too. She can destroy someone with her words just as fast as she could with her bare hands.

You’re hurt and upset, probably crying or maybe you’re angry at her. She knows you’re upset at her too…she just doesn’t care rn.

Once she’s gone off on her own to calm down, she’s thinking about what she said to you and the longer Vi thinks about it, replaying the words in her head, the more she feels guilty.

She comes back to find you later with the saddest look on her face. It’s obvious that she feels so guilty she wants to die right now but it doesn’t make the sting of her words any better.

“(Y/N)….I…” She can’t even come up with words that could fix this. She knows she really fucked up.

She’d definitely try to physically comfort you before she would try to offer comforting words. She does not know how to say sorry, it’s lowkey so hard for her. She feels sorry but the words just won’t leave her mouth.

Vi would sit or lay beside you and gently cup your chin in her hand, turning your face so she can look at you.

“Sorry…” She finally spits it out, watching your eyes water.

Then she’d go straight in for a kiss, maybe on the lips, maybe on your forehead. She’ll put her lips wherever you’ll let her rn.

If you accept/return the kiss, now she’s feeling more comfortable with talking. She’ll apologize again then kiss you again then apologize again then kiss you again, maybe slip a little compliment in about how precious you are to her then back to kisses. This goes on for like 5 minutes straight until you’re smiling a bit and your heart feels full again.

If you DONT accept her kisses or apologies, she’ll get so sad. This girl will just watch you with wide eyes, chewing on her lip as she asks “what…can I do?”

Honestly, give her any task you can think of, she will do it so fast with no complaints. Tell her to go jump off a bridge and she’s running there. Tell her to actually give you a proper apology and she will stutter through it and look at you with puppy dog eyes as she tries her best to make you feel like she doesn’t hate you.

If you’re just giving her the silent treatment, she will literally go disappear for like 8 hours. She’ll just give you space and go think about what she did. She’ll spend this time reflecting inward, thinking about what lead up to the outburst, why she felt the way she did, why she let her emotions get the best of her, why she took it out on you of all people.

When she finally comes back, hopefully you’re more ready to listen and respond to her. She’s so grateful when you are.

She will do literally anything for you when you’re upset with her. Even if it’s illegal or dangerous or something she has no idea about, she’ll figure it out and do it for you. Think there’s something she won’t do? Try her.

Once you’ve been consoled and talked to properly, when you’ve finally accepted her apology, she just wants to be close to your. You don’t have to be cuddling, you could just be holding hands or laying down with your head in her lap. She just needs the physical reassurance that you’re still her ✨partner✨

JINX 🦋

Let’s be real…Jinx blows up on you a lot. She just loses it too often and you two are so close, you’re always right in the path of destruction.

She’s not really the type to apologize after every time she blows up on you. If it’s obvious that you’re just butt hurt and irritated with her, she won’t bring up what happened but she will get all clingy and nice all of a sudden. She knows what she did and she’s gonna cheer you up and make you feel loved. She just wants to remind you that she’s unstable but your relationship shouldn’t be. She’s trying.

If she really upsets you, says something that really hits home, she’ll break down crying almost immediately after the words have left her lips. You might not even be crying yet, but Jinx is. She can tell by the look on your face, the way your lips are turned down and your eye brows are lowered, she can tell that you are truly hurt.

When you’re upset like this, she will cry hysterically as she tries to apologize and explain herself. She’ll be sniffling and hiccuping as she furiously wipes her wet eyes. Honestly, when she gets like this you think maybe she’s more upset than you are rn.

When she yells at you like this, it all comes pouring out of her mouth in the heat of the moment. She’s just in a blind rage. But as your face changes, she’s always reminded of her sister. The way her sister would yell at her and call her names. It triggers her and she always ends up sobbing in your lap, begging for your forgiveness, begging for you to stay with her, begging for you to love her still.

If you readily accept her apology and maybe offer her some comfort, she will comfort you back tenfold! She’s playing with your hair, gently scratching your back, offering to rub your feet while she’s still apologizing every so often. She feels like a bad dog who needs punishing and bc you won’t really punish her, she turns to manual labor on you. This is her punishment, pampering you until she’s exhausted.

If you’re not so quick to accept her apology, she gets scared…like actually terrified of you walking out on her right now. She’ll get really quiet, probably not even crying anymore, but she won’t let go of you. She’ll stay flush against you, her arms trapping your torso against her own. She feels like if she just clings to you, you can never leave. She can’t handle you leaving…plz don’t leave her.

As you both sit in silence, she’ll remain still, only moving to tighten her grip or lay her head on your other shoulder. In this moment, nothing else matters to her, no one else matters to her. Sure, she’s probably scared of being alone, but she’s never loved someone as much as she loves you. You are her everything…if she loses you…then she has nothing else to lose. She doesn’t know what she’ll do then.

She’s basically having a silent panic attack as she clings to you, awaiting your response. And she’ll wait forever if she has to.

If you need some space and time to yourself, she will literally just back away a little bit and still stay in the same room. She’s literally terrified…she thinks if she leaves the room she’ll never see you again. But she will stay silent and give you some breathing room.

Once you’re finally ready to talk about it, she’s constantly interrupting you to tell you that this is all her fault and how sorry she is. She isn’t trying to speak over you, she just feels like you shouldn’t be the one doing the talking, she just needs to make sure you know how horrible she feels.

As you talk it out and come to terms with what has happened between you two, she’ll get happy again and start smiling at you. She’s just so overjoyed that you forgave her and are willing to keep trying with her. That’s all she can ask of you…please keep trying. Don’t give up on her.

She’s a good girl at heart and she’s trying her best with what she’s got.

CAITLYN 🤍

It’s actually very rare that you two fight. Caitlyn can be very stubborn and hard headed but she is always willing to compromise for you.

This time tho…she just lost control. She was having a rough week, feeling like she lacked confidence and security in her job, feeling the weight of her parent’s expectations of her and she just snapped at you.

Yeah…it stings but she would never say anything offensive to you. Ever. She might raise her voice at you and call you a pain in her ass but a crude name or insult would never leave her mouth when talking to you.

She probably just told you to shut up and leave her alone bc she’s stressed okay? She can’t handle you rn. She needs to be alone and think in silence.

If you’re upset and decide to leave her be, she’ll spend maybe an hour or two alone before she comes to find you. When she does, she takes your hands in hers and says your name so softly. If you’re not looking at her, she’ll pull her hand away from yours to gently grab your chin and turn your face to her. She pretty much forces eye contact and tenderly whispers an apology.

If you decide not to leave her, maybe you just back away and stay on the other side of the room. She’ll accept your presence as long as you’re quiet…and after the way she said “shut up”, you’re sure to keep quiet.

After maybe 20 minutes, she’s speaking up to apologize…but she’s still in a sour mood. Don’t let her stern apology fool you. You should probably just stay silent.

Soon she’s waving her hand at you as she mumbles “come here…” and you do. You go to her slowly, noticing how she’s watching you. Once you’re within arms length of her, she’s reaching for your hands and trying to look into your sad eyes. She’ll shyly apologize as her thumbs rub over your hands.

If you don’t accept her apology so quickly, she’s very mature about it. She’ll tell you that she accepts your response and then she’ll say how sorry she is again before leaving you to think about it more. She’ll give you space for as long as you need it. She’ll busy herself with other things while still thinking of what she can say to make you understand how sorry she is. She’ll take this time apart to really think about how much you mean to her and how she can better herself and your relationship.

If you immediately accept her apology, she’ll pull you into a tight hug and gently kiss your cheek before explaining herself to you. Caitlyn feels like she has to explain where she’s coming from and why she snapped like that. She needs you to know that she’s not upset with you and she shouldn’t have taken her anger out on you. She doesn’t want you thinking she’s mad at you when she’s actually mad at everything but you.

Whenever you decide to accept her apology, she wants to have a whole conversation about it immediately. Like I said, Caitlyn is very mature, very polite and caring. She wants to talk this out like a couple in love should. She wants to dive deep into your partnership and make sure you’re feeling okay.

She just cares about you so much. She never means to snap at you…she’s just under a lot of pressure. So when it does happen, she can’t just sweep it under the rug. She must be sure that you still love her and that you know she still loves you. Plz tell her you still love her.

[radio-fmm]

Withered

Sanji x gardener!reader

Warnings: fluff with a little angst, mentions of sickness and fainting, fem reader

Word count: 1,526 words

Summary: In which you got sick because you worked so hard. From my gardener!reader series but can be read as a stand alone.

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“SANJI IT’S NOT FAIR” Luffy screamed while throwing himself at the cook who was busy prepping vegetables “Luffy we already told you that because y/n is sick the garden is not in conditions for us to eat stuff from it” Nami said for like a millionth time that day.

You had fainted yesterday morning and have had a fever since, you were still very weak, because of this, your powers affected all the plants around the ship… and Sanji’s mood apparently, he had already gone trough half a box of cigarettes and it was just past noon.

“But you’re making something why can’t I have some?” The captain whined once more “This is all the vegetables I could salvage from the garden and its all going to y/n’s soup so she can get better sooner” he explained as patiently as he could. Since the garden was withering the food rations were now just half, and obviously the most affected form this was Luffy since he wasn’t having any snacks between dinners. “I’ve never seen her sick like this” sighed Nami a little worry in her eyes “Don’t worry! We have the best doctor in the world! He’ll take care of her!” Luffy exclaimed, he noticed how Sanji tensed at Namis comment, breath shaky “You know she’s strong, she’ll be fresh as a fruit in no time!” he said while patting Sanji’s back smiling brightly.

He took the vegetable soup steaming hot and walked to your room, opened the door ever so slowly so he wouldn’t make any noise and wake you up. He was greeted with Chopper sitting beside your bed with a cold towel in your forehead “How is she?” Sanji asked in a whisper “Better that yesterday but still has a little fever, she’ll be up in a day or two” Chopper explained with worry… there was something he wasn’t telling for sure “Is it just a fever?” Sanji positioned the soup in the nightstand beside you while looking at the doctor who had started to sweat “Oh yeah yeah just… just that no biggie he he” He answered quickly while looking away from the cook. Sanji tensed, eyes twitching “Chopper…” he went down to his eye level “It wouldn’t be really professional if you lied to me about a patient diagnosis would it?” the reindeer panicked “She made me promise! Confidentiality with my patients comes first!”

There it was… The blonde sighed and massaged his temples “If you don’t tell me I’ll probably go insane” there was a pause, the doctor was getting worried not only about you but now also about Sanji, he looked so disheveled, big bags under his eyes, hair all over the place, his smell of cigarettes stronger than other days and instead of having his neatly tuxedo on he had just thrown in a shirt, no tie, with a couple loosed buttons… he looked like he was going insane. “Fine, just because I know you care a lot” he started “She fainted because she had pushed her body too far. In our last fight with the marines she used her powers to protect us too long and didn’t rest properly” he paused to look at you “Her body is just asking for a break, I scolded her because this is not the first time she ends up sick because of this, and she asked me to keep it a secret”

Of course you did… you always overworked yourself and Sanji couldn’t do anything about its since he did that too, how ironic. He looked back at where you slept, you looked so peaceful for someone so sick, your hair covering the pillow like a spider web and your mouth parted a little. “I gave her medicine and the fever has gone down but she needs to rest!”

“Thank you Chopper I’ll take care of her now” the cook sat at the end of the bed as the reindeer left the room quietly

He admired you for a moment, worry shaking trough his body. You’ve been a straw hat for a long time now, and still felt like you owed everyone. “Sunlight” he spoke up. As he removed hairs from your face, you groaned and wiggled under the covers, scrunched your face as you opened your eyes trying to focus on the man before you “There you are” he said feeling a little better since he could look at your eyes once more.

“Sanji?” You yawned and stretched before you felt a stinging pain travel trough your muscles that made you groan “Take it easy dear” Sanji stood up and helped you sit on your bed “It’s ok I got it” slowly but surely you made yourself comfortable. “Made you this” Your eyes widened a smiled was painted on your face “Oh god I most be dreaming!” you let out a laugh that made Sanji feel lighter, softer. How could you still be bright as day while you’re sick? “Thank you! You didn’t had to tho” you tried to take the plate from his hands but he backed up “Slow down there sweetheart” he grinned playfully “Now what kind of gentleman would I be if I let a sick woman eat by herself?” Maybe you should get sick more often if it meant having this kind of treatment form the cook, your whole face turned all shades of red and you stiffened. But the day you decline Sanji’s food, is the day you’ve gone mad, so you leaned and took the spoonful.

You happily ate the whole plate between chatter laughs and shared stares “Sanji I really don’t know how you manage to outdo yourself every time!” You always made sure the cook knew how amazing his skills were, which always made him smile proud and puff out his chest feeling absolutely unstoppable “Thank you dear” you smiled and thanked him for the hundred time “Can you do me a favor Sanji? Before you leave?” The mentioned felt his legs babble at the way his name left your lips, whenever you asked him something, which was very rare because you’re not the type to ask for help for anyone, your voice always flowed in such a way, like a soft plead, that made Sanji’s breath and heartbeat stop “Anything dear!”

“Could you open the blinds for me?” without missing a beat he opened them so that the sun could pour in your room, you closed your eyes and sighed in satisfaction, taking in the rays of sun like a flower opening her petals Sanji thought, you looked angelic

“Can I now ask you something y/n” your eyes opened in fear, whenever the blonde cook called you by your name without nothing endearing attached to it he was about to say something really serious “Of course” all your attention was on him who sat now in the chair next to you so he could see you better and closer “Why are you overworking yourself?” a silence was followed, nervousness hanged in the air piercing both of your ears, you’ve talked about this with Sanji before but nothing ever this serious. You looked at him and notice his weary eyes, you sighed “I… don’t know” your eyes ran away from his face “I just want to be of use for everyone in the crew… did Chopper said something?” The cook nodded with a little guilt as you covered your face in your hands, embarrassed to be somehow a burden.

“You all make me so happy, so this is my way to pay you back” you offered a smile as Sanji sat there, wordless, it was like he was hearing his own thoughts, your hearts were so much alike that it stunted him sometimes, so, he said what he would like to hear himself “You’re not a tool or a maid, you’re a strawhat” he leaned in to take your hand in his “Luffy invited you to join this crew not only because of your powers or strength, but also because he believes in you and likes you… as so do I” you felt your eyes water a bit which made the blondes heart hurt “Your health and happiness is important to everyone in the crew”.

You sighed and hugged Sanji, tightly and with such eagerness and grateful you could always count on him to make you feel wanted and important, you were always strong and kind in front of everyone but he always managed to get your vulnerable side out “Thank you Sanji, I promise I won’t do that ever again” you whispered in his ear, Sanji felt like floating, your hug was so full of love that made his head spin, heart pounding hard and pink creeping trough his neck, you were so sweet “But I must ask you the same, please let me help you too” he stiffened, he sure wasn’t ready for that talk.

He cleared his throat before pulling out of your embrace which hurt him like hell and taking the plate “You don’t worry that pretty head of yours dear” he walked towards your door “I’ll keep an eye on you cook!”

Oh please, do~

⋆ ˚ ꩜ ｡ ⋆୨୧˚

I sweat next one in the series would be a confession I had this idea and got carried away lol, as always you can request what you wanna read about these two and correct me if I made any mistakes English is not first language!