#she was more to me than i expected
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Learning who desrves that type of loyalty and valuing your loves worth should be set higher then your loyalty is to someone who doesnt love you properly
Being committed to a person who can’t love you properly is one of the hardest feelings to shake
#feelings#words#life quotes#my soulmate#relationship quotes#spilled emotions#spilled thoughts#she was more to me than i expected#excerpt from a book i'll never write#you were never good to me#my thoughts#my love#loyalty#love#worthy of love
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your pearl is one of my favorite designs for her i’ve ever seen <3 her face shape feels so right, and i love how you draw her hair. by way of a request, have you ever drawn her as an avian?
thank you so much! pearl's design is definitely my favorite to draw :')
ive done a bit of practice with pearl and grian as avians but that was way before i started posting hc publicly! ( these ones are new :D )
also played around with an alternate version! i dont know much about birds but i saw the australian barn owl and took more inspo from them
#pearlescentmoon#i also drew pearl with her head tilted all the way like how owls do but it ended up a bit freakier than i expected heh#me barely dipping my toes into more crechur designs... im too scared to try#eydireqs#asks#hc#my art#pearl was THE first hermit i ever drew (cleaning lady pearl and suit pearl)#she's always looked like this to me in my head#although in my earlier sketches she had curlier hair in the front that slowly phased out to the swoopy ones she has now#anyway this was really fun to do!!! i definitely need to do more studies on how wings work but :DD#learning many a things over here
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I remember that when everything was happening with Noah Schnapp, so many people were saying that ‘he’s a white coloniser!’ ‘he’s clearly European!’ and ‘how are we supposed to think he’s indigenous to the Middle East when he looks like that?!’ They were screaming so much about he couldn’t possibly be from the swana region due to being pale, despite the fact that… wait for it…
Noah Schnapp is a Moroccan Jew.
The exact the same thing happened with Jerry Seinfeld too, despite him being a Syrian Jew.
But what this tells me is that so many American and European leftists fundamentally do not understand what North Africans and Southwest Asians look like. They do not understand that many Middle Eastern groups are pale, many Middle Eastern groups share features with Europeans— I mean, the Middle East literally borders Europe, did you not expect us to have similarities? This stretches back to the ancient world too. We know that in Yehuda there were gingers, as shown by King David*. Iirc, studies on Rameses the second’s remains show that he most likely had an olive tanned complexion and reddish-blondish hair, similar to a European Mediterranean look— which makes total sense seeing as Egypt is literally a Mediterranean country as well
It’s not just Jews. Persians, Kurds, Assyrians, Copts, Amazigh, Arabs from the Arabian Peninsula**, all of these ethnic groups are incredibly diverse in their features, even without any significant genetic influence from other areas. You cannot just project American and European black and white concepts of race onto the Middle East and act as if that is reality. The world is not split into pale people in the north, brown people in the middle, and black people in the south, and if you genuinely believe that then you really need to look at some pictures of the groups that you’re claiming to be the defender of. Please. I’m so tired of this bullshit lol
*I know that the historical evidence for David is shaky at best and we’re not sure if he was real or not (I personally believe it’s a King Arthur sort of situation where there was a real person here that got turned into legend), what I’m trying to say is that if the Ivrim could have a figure like this who was ginger, then the Ivrim clearly had gingers. Nobody come for me please
**not adding other Arabs because there tends to be genetic mixes with other groups, and my point is about how even without distinct genetic markers from each other, middle easterners groups can turn out with a super intense variation in appearance, especially skin tone
#like it’s funny to me when I see Ashkenazim say that they’re pale because that’s the European genetic mixing or whatever#cause like there’s plenty of people on my Iranian Jew side of the family that are pale as shit#my mum’s cousin is half of our Iranian Jewish subculture and half Persian Jewish and she’s light as well#that doesn’t mean they have that much European dna it just means that the Middle East is much more to the north than people expect lol#antisemitism#leftist antisemitism#I could tag this as racism or stuff but I think that would attract Hamasnikim lol#also I think a lot of this twisting into a pretzel on what people in North Africa and Southwest Asia look like#comes from trying to ‘prove’ that Jews aren’t Middle Eastern because apparently we’ve overfilled the maximum ‘swana pale quota’ for them
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steph and babs don’t need personas, as far as anyone is concerned they’re just family friends.
bruce has his “brucie wayne” persona, very clumsy, playboy, kinda air headed but still very smart and wants to do good for gotham. which of course makes him seem naive cause good?? for gotham??
dick has “richie grayson-wayne” who’s dabbled in modeling before becoming a gymnastics teacher. also very vocal about his “adorable little siblings”
jason never really had a “nickname” after all he was from crime alley and he had to look GOOD for them or else they’d go back to “he’s just like the rest of them”. his persona was very empathetic and kind though, which worked great for him since that’s how he was like. he always talked about doing several non profit charities. the elites switched their opinions of him on a dime, although the rest of gotham adored him.
damian refuses to go by a nickname. his persona is based around animals, mostly about abandoned animals. it’s very clear his goal for the future is to make good animal shelters and help every animal he can. it’s the only persona he could stomach and there were SEVERAL other ideas
cass is “cass wayne” very quiet, polite, generally just there in the background. normally hanging around one of her siblings, most often tim. although her being around him unnerves some of them, she’ll get a look in her face and then her and tim both know they were lying. they fully get why she hangs around tim
duke is regularly seen as the normal one. pleasant to be around, kind, but generally also just there. very normal student, not really sure what he’s gonna do. the elites don’t particularly for him, though the rest of gotham love him.
tim’s persona differs from the rest pretty heavily. he can’t get away with being like bruce, the elites vividly remember janet and see her in him very often, which vaguely scares them if they’ll be honest. he’ll act like “Tim Drake-Wayne” to unsettle them, after all he’s a Drake why is he acting clumsy? they’ve seen him when he was younger and he was the spitting image of perfect. it makes more sense to them when he trips and lands right where he can tell them something no one else can hear. “Timothy Drake” is what scares them though. the tim that casually whispers secrets no one else knows, who points out someone they’re supposed to have a “private meeting with” in a week. who has nearly cause several of them to go broke with such simple actions, and the only reason they didn’t was cause he let them stay rich. there was one elite who insulted damian near tim and suddenly said elite had to get an apartment in crime alley, pay his now ex-wife, a kid he had with some random person, and several debts
the fact that lex luther and tim are some kind of friends also doesn’t make them feel super great but that’s another issue
#tim drake#bruce wayne#damian wayne#jason todd#cassandra cain#dick grayson#unhinged tim drake#chaotic tim drake#i am pushing the tim and lex being weird friends who aren’t really friends but they tolerate each other significantly more than you would#expect. gotta be on good terms with the in laws right?#tim starts walking over to someone and they scramble for a reason to leave and hide#dc stands for disregard canon#is tim fanonized in this? yes. am i gonna stop making him like that? no. and you can’t make me#lex: who are you trying to bankrupt now?#tim: that bitch right there. she insulted cass’s clothing who does that? ig she also called me a slur but who cares#lex is debating if he needs to get someone to take care of a dead body. mentally preparing for this to be thing to make tim go super villain
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More Jason and Cass thoughts (sorry but also not sorry) but if I was magically given full control over DC and could write what I'd want obviously I'd make Cass Batman but I've been thinking of what sort of reaction and role Jason would have in response. I think I'd write his version of "Congrats on the new job!" as a test, involving the Joker and civilians and gangs and Red Hood and a ton of explosives. Bruce failed me, and now he's given up. You're his successor, let's see how you handle this dilemma that freaked him out so badly he threw a batarang into my throat rather than let me avenge my own death in front of him.
So obviously Cass will overcome the traps and the puzzles. That's the fun part to show how competent both of them are and sprinkle in little character moments as we go. But then we reach the emotional crux of the matter, probably laid out as some sort of saw trap because it's Jason. Here I am, a victim of murder. You say nobody dies tonight but I did, and I want the man who did it dead. Not only did Batman fail to avenge me but he failed to stop the Joker from going on to create even more victims. What right do you have to stop me from getting justice for myself? What right does this man have to life after what he's taken from me and from countless others? I'm not trying to kill a random stranger, I'm specifically demanding justice for my own death that I never got while I was gone.
There are two ways this could go. The straightforward route if I knew my time on this run was limited would probably be a pyrrhic victory like the ones Cass's og series was so fond of. Just like Bruce in utrh, she acts on instinct and saves the Joker (and Jason this time) . A win technically, but she fails the test. Jason is once again vindicated but with nothing to show for it. The story ends with Cass sending the Joker back to jail and going back to the batcave, where the old Robin costume looms judgementally, highlighting her failure. It would be the most fitting end given their character molds, all tragedy and conviction and unstoppable force meets immovable object etc.
However... I think the option I prefer would be a little different. Cass levelling with Jason, a killer talking to a murder victim. She has no right to stop Jason from getting justice, she has no love for the Joker but she knows any death she allows to happen like this would devastate her, just like that death row inmate long ago she tried to break out but ended up letting go once the family of the victim talked to her and demanded justice. I think... In this specific situation, she'd just be honest. Morally she has no right sure. Personally she just really really doesn't want anyone to die. Give her one chance, please. Let her try it her way. Not demanding, not lecturing or insisting, just... Please. Don't do this. Let me try another way.
And then what? Jason asks.
In the end a deal is struck. Cass will take the Joker and lock him up, ensuring he never harms anyone again while also trying to rehabilitate him. But the second she fails and he gets free, Jason kills him and she won't stand in his way. It's the kind of deal that leaves both of them mildly disgusted and dissatisfied with themselves, neither of them naturally creatures of compromise when it comes to this specific topic. But Cass is willing to do anything to avoid death and Jason did not expect the new Bat to be so... Flexible? Kind of? Of course maybe she won't actually hold up her end of the deal and when the Joker gets loose she'll try and stop Jason from killing him and he'll get his miserable vindication, but right now this is something strange and new and he's mildly confused and curious about where it will go. He doesn't believe in her ability to contain the Joker forever but he's willing to let her try because her reaction to that future failure interests him. She's given him a sword of damocles to hang above her head and he didn't ask for it or expect it. It's the type of power he never thought the Bat would just... Hand to him.
The conflict ends with neither of them fully winning or losing. They both don't really know what to feel about this.
The thing is, the second Cass let's Jason kill the Joker she's hanging up the mantle. She's staking the Bat on this, because it's always go big or go home with her when it comes to saving others, even someone like the Joker. In this magical universe where I have unlimited power, Cass would lock the Joker in a secret bunker and have Leslie Thompkins talk to him daily, mostly because I think her pacifism speeches and debates in the comics would make a fun contrast to the Joker's evil sadism. (But what about his rights? Doesn't he deserve a trial and to be held in a regular prison? I'm going to be honest I think Cass would be very comfortable bending the rules on this specific situation. Morally questionable but I'd have fun with it. She's going to let Leslie treat Joker like her personal pet project to save his soul because yes she wants him to change but also she's got a city to save every night so go crazy Leslie, have fun.)
And the Batman series would continue with Cass as the lead, new challenges and new antagonists and every twenty issues or so for the first hundred we'll cut back to the Joker briefly if his chats with Leslie can help highlight some thematic element of the current arc. But bit by bit he'd slowly fade away onto oblivion, maybe getting referenced every hundred issues or so until eventually no one remembers or cares about him because there's so much else going on. Meanwhile Jason's got a good thing going as Red Hood, primarily based in Park Row and a tentative ally on the occasion when their vigilante work aligns. Unlike Joker he's a much more frequent character in the comics, and after say 10 years (this is my magical fantasy universe Cass's batman run is going to last for a very long time alright) when people think of DC characters they think of Red Hood long before they think of the Joker.
Is any of this realistic? Right now of course not. It's why I'd go with the pyrrhic victory if I actually got the chance, because it would be the best way to tell the story in the larger context of the Bat narrative. But it's my fantasy DC editor and writer daydream and I'm going to dream big. They're never going to be normal happy siblings, their personal demons will never fully let them be free and the looming possibility of losing everything they currently have narrative wise if Bruce comes back as Batman will always be there. But it's maybe the closest to peace they'll ever get. Unsatisfying and tame compromise that probably violates several laws and ethical codes but whatever. Cass has never read the Geneva convention and Jason's not going to shed tears over the Joker. Let him die relevancy wise if not physically.
#dc#cassandra cain#batfam#dc rambles#Jason Todd#In terms of the larger meta narrative ultimately whether the Joker dies or gets locked up is irrelevant#But Cass will never be willing to just let someone die without trying to the very end to make her case for their life#And I think it's entirely possible Jason would reject her proposal and we're back to square one#But I think the two main reasons to me that he'd accept is one. Cass betting her career on this. She doesn't need to do that.#She could save the Joker and fail Jason's personal test and that would be that. Her actually reaching out#Being willing to risk something precious just to try and compromise with Jason. It would be more than he expected#From a family that he understandably believes he does not matter enough to#And secondly is the long term consequence of the Joker fading into irrelevancy while Jason maintains his prominence as a character#A reverse of his death where he was turned into nothing but a footnote and a memorial for Batman angst#While the Joker went on to gain even more narrative power as Batman's Greatest Enemy#Now he is nothing. And Jason is alive and a solid part of the mythos#It would take time obviously but ultimately from a Doylist sense to me it's the most satisfying resolution#Maybe after like 10 years Cass can die again briefly the Joker gets out and Jason gets to kill him to give Maps some fun Robin angst#But ultimately it's very important to me that if Cass becomes batman the Joker must become irrelevant#He's just not useful enough thematically to be worth his current narrative weight when she's running the show
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- I heard there's a newlywed couple here. May I join the celebration? - We're not married yet. But maybe soon.
#The Secret of Us the series#tsou#tsou the series#thai gl#gl drama#*mine#when she said 'soon' i did not expect it to be like... that weekend lmao#i really like this series but no joke the time jump scares me more than horror movie jumpscares#ANYWAY#like Steph said: they are THE BIGGEST TUB OF CUTE
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vampire empire.
#HAII I WORKED VERY HARD ON THIS AND IT MIGHT BE MY MAGNUM OPUS BUT NAH#CLAUUUDIAAAA AMY LOVELY BFF CLAUDIA#she is stronger than me because i would’ve gone insane way earlier#kaitsart#interview with the vampire#interview with the vampire fanart#interview with the vampire 2022#iwtv#claudia iwtv#claudia de pointe du lac#claudia de lioncourt#louis de pointe du lac#lestat de lioncourt#pmv#?#iwtv season 2#iwtv s2#iwtv spoilers#please expect me to make more pmvs in the future i am not normal about this show
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Skén:nen sá:sewh
as promised, here's Precious boy™ getting kissed by Precious wife™ because he deserves all the love in the world :cc
translation: Get home safe
#nobody translate the file name#nah but home girl is the strongest soldier let me tell you#imagine date/being married to an assassin fr I would loose my mind#I'm such a sucker for the friends to lovers trope ok hear me out#Girlie is an ally to the assassin's and that's how she meets Connor and they become friends because Ratonhnhaké:ton deserves more friends o#she is VERY smart knows how to stand her ground but also very sweet and funny he respects and admires her a lot and so does she#she's from another displaced kanien'kehá:ka clan they bond really close sooner than later the feeling just blooms everyone's knows but THEM#until prob the recruits and the people in the homestead get tired of these oblivious fools in love and plot to finally get them together#I headcanon Connor didn't settle down completely until they were expecting their first child like they both panicked when they realized#I mean they're already married and stuff but still our girl is all over the place bcs she's scared of something happening to him or the bby#and connor acts cool and leveled on the outside but he's just a whirpool of emotions on the inside as well it's really funny to watch#they probably broke down in tears from both laughter and fear but they are amazing parents we are certain of it :')#I want their dinamic to be like that mainly because Connor deserves some light and laugh in his life after all the things he went through#connor i'm in love with your wife#ratonhnhaké:ton#connor kenway#connor's mistery wife#ac 3#assassin's creed#oc#the way you can tell I almost never draw men just from this sketch 💀#my art
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For the requests: maybe Dash and Spitfire are doing some bonding gaming with Scoots? I'm sure they enjoy some console gaming, but maybe they could be convinced to do some board games as well?
I had to color this in because I loved this idea too much. Scootaloo gets some help from Spitfire and learns an important lesson about strategy and playing the long game.
Poor Rainbow gets demolished.
#Rainbow - honestly what did you expect?#You can't let Spitfire and Scootaloo team up and expect not to be beaten swift and quickly#Honestly this is more of a Rainbow vs Spitfire#with little Scootaloo being oblivious. She's just here for the fun#I can absolutely see them do board games#And both Spitfire and Rainbow take it so serious because they are in it to WIN#it's the Wonderbolt drive they all have#Ok but this was such an adorable prompt#I love love love the three of them...#I left it open in the image but I love to think of Spitfire as a sort of step-mom/not really yet but kinda surrogate mom#in the in between state of 'this kid clearly means more to me and I'm spending more time with her than others'#but she's not officially part of the family and a mom (or rather dad) yet#spitdash#spitfire#mlp spitfire#rainbow dash#scootaloo#mlp scootaloo#mlp#my art#requests#ask chim
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Bitter Truth
#mdzs#lan qiren#madam lan#they were in love and I will die on that hill#mdzs art#my art#in chinese flower language blue gentians mean elegance purity and bitter truth#I like the hanahaki take where a couple in love are aware of each other’s feelings and return them but are unable to act on it#just more suffering for them to go through :)#you can’t tell me that through those long years of isolation with only the visits being her children (maybe) her a-hole husband and her BIL#that they didn’t bond over the boys and games of weiqi and heated discussions about Lan regulations and possibly#just maybe#started to wish for that ever dangerous ‘what if’#because they could never have it—he could never act on it and she was leashed in place#he might work up his courage to go against the rules for her but by that point she’s dead#and he can only punish himself and push himself to higher expectations than before and become what his brother failed to be#be what she needed even after she’s gone and instead protect her sons the way he could not protect her
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Okay, I'm going to talk about the Illario comment from the AMA. This one:
It frames Illario in a way that feels like he deserves everything that happened because he is Bad. Viago, Teia, and Lucanis (and Caterina????) are Good and Illario is Bad. Illario had to be kept in check, because he is Bad. Lucanis belittles Illario because he is Bad. Caterina never respected or cared for Illario because he is Bad.
The idea that the reason Illario was treated the way he was is because everyone around him could just tell he was just inherently Not As Good As Them in some way is an awful thing to suggest, but it's also a bad storytelling choice, because it's boring? Illario is a tragedy, he's not a kids' cartoon villain. He's a victim of his circumstances, a victim of favoritism, a victim of abuse. It doesn't absolve him of his own choices (crimes), but it does explain them. In a way that is way more interesting, and tragic, and satisfying than just "well he was Bad all along".
BUT ALSO Illario isn't even that bad? Before *this*, what is the worst thing Illario has ever done? His job?? Is his crime not developing an abundance of empathy and altruism in an environment that was literally intentionally designed to turn him into a ruthless killer?? He is pretty selfish and only cares about himself and his family (which is, again, exactly how he was raised to be), but just because he isn't "good" doesn't mean he's evil.
In The Wigmaker Job when Lucanis asks him to, he rounds up the slaves and gets them to safety even though he thinks they should kill them because they're witnesses. Lucanis says he trusts Illario, says he "may be a snob, but he's true to his word", and he IS! Illario could have just left them and made up some excuse, and the only consequence would have been Lucanis being mad/disappointed, but he didn't. Both Lucanis and Teia mention that he is the one who follows Lucanis and helps put out all the proverbial fires Lucanis starts. Illario doesn't have to put up with any of this. He chooses to follow Lucanis, and chooses to help people when Lucanis asks him to. He's not evil, he is very explicitly neutral.
Because while Illario doesn't have empathy for strangers (which is a survival thing! He can't feel empathy for people he has to kill them! Lucanis is an anomaly) he has an abundance of it for Lucanis. He worries about Lucanis, he cares about Lucanis! He resents Caterina's treatment of not only himself, but Lucanis too. He wouldn't send someone he loves out to die on dangerous missions, and part of him resents that Caterina does it to Lucanis. ("If I was in charge, you wouldn't have to do this anymore.")
And, genuinely, if Caterina had spontaneously decided to retire to some remote island somewhere after The Wigmaker Job and leave Illario in charge, what would happen? What horrible crimes would an "unchecked" Illario have unleashed upon the world that Caterina had to protect us all from? Firing Lucanis? Honestly probably not even that, since it's more likely he'd play up his own rashness in an attempt to convince Lucanis that he most definitely should not leave Illario unattended and should instead stay safe and sound by his side, since that's the tactic he uses to convinced Lucanis to join him in this note ("Would you truly leave me to my own devices? What would I do without you!")
Illario isn't a bad person, and Caterina wasn't "keeping him in check" oh my god.
#No one is Bad. And certainly no one is BORN Bad. Illario is not inherently evil. Illario didn't do anything to deserve how he's been treated#illario dellamorte#veilguard spoilers#I trust Mary Kirby too much to believe this is her take or her intent. Right?#The real Illario is still there in the game; it's the overall story that failed him#I will until otherwise proven give her the benefit of the doubt that *this* wasn't her fault or her choice or her message#Also Epler stop talking about characters you didn't write challenge#This is mostly ranting but I tried to keep it short and somewhat coherent#OH ALSO the idea that Caterina kept him in check pisses me off because if she wanted to she would have by beating and torturing him into#what she wanted#Illario is actually the more obedient Dellamorte despite his actions lately. He's the one who is shocked and confused when Lucanis goes#against the job. Illario comments about how only Lucanis would delay a summon from the First Talon#Illario either doesn't expect as much leniency as Lucanis does or he's more afraid of the consequences than Lucanis is
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I don't think Jayce and Viktor literally died. They were kind of pulled into another dimension/astral plane/whatever you call it. We see older Viktor, and while it could be another Viktor, I think it would be more meaningful if it was our Viktor, finally free from the arcane, going through the universe with Jayce, fixing timelines together. Kind of like a cosmic mission.
#jayvik#arcane spoilers#arcane season 2#arcane#the yaoi isn't as doomed as it seems#i mean arcane s2 wasn't perfect#and jayvik left me feeling colder than expected#they played a huge role in the end and they barely had screentime this season????#i will always love jayvik tho#otp otp i adore them#jayvik screentime isn't the only issue I have with season 2 tho#the way piltover vs zaun was treated.........#“omg if we work together we can solve our differences” what differences tho there was a clear power imbalance and police brutality I'm????#plus jink's “death” was kinda forced and weak?? so last minute??? like I know she isn't actually dead but yeah#and sevika????? where's my wife?????? she did NOTHING on act 3???? did she even talk????#also mel has never been my favourite bc they mainly used her as a plot device and a romantic interest to a male character which suckss#but in s1 she started to show vulnerability in the end??? even early s2??? like girl where is all of that??#that's WAY more interesting than the “tough serious warrior” character she's become#anyway everything happened too quickly#too much time spent on noxus shit#ooooh i wonder what the next show is going to be about hmmmm#and so many things weren't explained#everything surrounding viktor and the arcane and what happened to jayce and viktor was kinda foggy#also wtf is sky doing there???? it should have been little viktor or something idk#plus where are caitlyn's dictator arc and vi's boxer arc?? they barely lasted???#and maddie should have been more prominent if she was working with ambessa? we barely saw her (or ambessa) manipulate caitlyn#also ambessa's plan wasn't 100% clear either so I'm guessing that plot line (and singed's???) will appear again sometime
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"why couldn't shuro have just been honest about what he felt with laios and falin it's not that hard" are you. are you White
#dungeon meshi#shuro#toshiro nakamoto#look you can hate him for other things but this is very clearly a case of cultures (& personalities influenced by these cultures) clashing#shuro is japanese/east asian-coded and laios is european white boy#i am not japanese but i also come from a collectivistic society#pakikisama is a filipino value both prized and abhorred#it relies heavily on being able to read social cues and prior knowledge of societal norms#shuro being from a different country/culture is important to his character#his repressed nature is meant to contrast with laios' open one like that's the point#they both had similar upbringings but different coping mechanisms#shuro explicitly admits that he's jealous of laios being able to live life sincerely#anyway the point is they were operating on different expectations entirely and neither had healthy enough communication skills#to hash things out before they got too bad#re his attraction to falin i personally believe he unfortunately mpdg-ed her#she represented something new & different. a fresh drink of water for his parched repressed self#alas not meant to be#i'll be honest the way ryoko kui handles both fantasy & regular racism in dm is more miss than hit for me#i don't doubt that a lot of the shuro hate is based off of marcille's pov of him#marcille famously racist 😭#characters' racist views don't often get (too) challenged#practically everyone is casually racist at some point#anyway. again if you're gonna hate shuro at least hate him for being complicit in human trafficking & slavery#he couldn't help falling for the wrong woman goddamn 😭#calemonsito notes#edit: upon further reflection i take back what i said about toshiro mpdg-ing falin!#i'm sorry toshiro 😭
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I just found out that my mom has a jewish grandfather who has roots from germany making him as ashkenazi despite being born in the west indies.
since judaism comes from the mom, it doesnt really matter if she got it from her mom or dad does it ?? all that matters is that it comes from the moms side. if the mother has jewish roots from her side then that her kids r jewish. by those means im jewish ????
never knew i was a jew until the age of nearly 17 and I havent celebrated shabbat or read torah, traditions, explored judaism and no nothing, worn a kippah, did hanukkah candles, went to a synagogue (except on my school trip but I was still so young???), and more.
how the fuck like
im in so much shock like you mean to tell me i am a jew all this time ??? and the fact that my uncle explained the judaism line in our family aka his family. like the jewish side comes from my uncle and mom (since they r bothers and sisters since they were both born to my grandma which had my mom so its my moms brother) their side is the German side (ashkenazi) and my moms grandfather (my great grandfather) is a jew from germany. his mother is jewish and the judaism is only in the father’s side all the way to my mom passed my grandma making it my moms side of the family.
like. u mean to tell me. I am jewish ??? JEWISH ???? ALL THIS TIME ???
I asked her yesterday to make me and her do an ancestry test and find out what else is in our tree. I come from an extremely diverse background so I wouldnt be suprised if HALF the generation is a jew up until this point of the grandfather.
the fact it is from the father’s side only ????? like... I AM SO IN SHOCK ???
#being jewish struggles#yall im a jew after all this time#imagine hiding it from me and i wouldnt have known#the family tree is... interesting...#its the way it was the rememberance of the tragic thing of jewish people and i ask my uncle#“hey r there any jews in our family?” and he goes “yeah there r some in japan too.. u got japanese jews you got german jews#and a few more..” ???????#like ??????????????? what the actual fuck#im so glad im taking the test that me and my mom r about to do I NEED TO FIND OUT MORE ABOUT THE JEWISH SIDE#apparently due to where he comes from there are alot of diverse jews#like in his country where he was born (in the west indies) there were polish jews dutch jews sephardic jews and for my mom#her side is syrian and she has muslim people as well as jewish people who are mizrahi as well#im not even suprised if it stretches further than i expect it to#its the way i wouldnt have known if i never have asked. right now we r checking the tree to see what else is there#i guess im a proud jew ???? never had a jewish lifestyle so hopefully when i get a job and a house i can feel closer to my roots#i hope i still count as a jew.#judaism#jewish#multiracial and jewish struggles#i hate it here#why does the jewish line come from my MOM but it has to BE the DADS SIDE ONLY URGHHHH the best part about it is that its from the moms side#so matter what ur considered jewish AS LONG AS ITS ON MY MOTHER’S LINE since judaism is about the mom...very VERY STRICT about who is n not#so im black/white & asian with arab desi creole african european west indian (west indies) & jewish... interesting...#watch me get something more suprising. my great grandma is indian like fully blown indian mixed w bengali and pakistani and her background#is sri lankan.. my great grandfather is jewish from germany.. my great great great great grandma and father r muslims.. my head hurts#ITS TOO MUCH FUCKING INFORMATION LIKE HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO FUCKING GRASP ON ALL THAT..#all i know is that my momma dont believe in a religion. she leans into islam and sometimes god. my dad is FULLY Christian.#not suprised if hes also hiding jewish roots in the tree and hid it from me since he is kinda... deceased now.#like i said im taking a dna test and find out my roots and connect the dots because THIS is all insane. ALL INSANE.
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can't believe a show based on a videogame (usually games adaptations are notoriously bad, which isn't the case here tho) gave me the beauty and the beast/twisted mirrors/enemies to traveling companions/ruthless antihero+optmistic but still badass heroine who takes none of his shit/age gap but make it sexy dynamic of my dreams. as much as i love maximus and i think he deserves the best writing ever because 1. he's a clever deconstruction of the aspiring Knight bro who's actually a bit of a loser and, as much as lucy, sees the world in black&white at first and then doesn't get what he thought he wanted but what he needs (or at least i hope he'll eventually get it), and 2. he's a cutie and i want an epic love story for him too, it's very funny how they tried to give us a puppy kind of romance and the tumblr girlies still fixated on the "toxic ~she bites his finger off and he cuts hers off and sews it on his hand in what we'll pretend it's a symbolic marriage rings exchange or whatever~ asshole who used to be a nice guy/good girl™ with a lot of spunk and hidden anger but unshakeable morals" kind of relationship.
#mind you idt the writers will ever have the guts to go for this pair or anything and i'm perfectly okay with the maximus/lucy romance#but still. they tried to give us the wholesome love story between two cuties with a killer side#and the fandom went ~mmmh we kinda want for that girl and the noseless radioactive ghoul to fuck nasty actually#shhdhdhf i'm sorry but this was so predictable to me. conosco i miei polli#also. i don't fully understand those who see it as a father/daughter thing? just because it worked on tlos#doesn't mean we need the same kind of dynamic here#1. despite him being an actual father (or at least. he was 200+ years ago) i've never seen a less paternal character than the ghoul lmao#2. lucy is an adult woman. young but in her mid twenties i guess? cooper had (and maybe still has) a daughter but the kid was like. 6 or 7?#lucy doesn't need a daddy she's a grown up. stop infantilizing women all the freaking time#let them be fully equals!! let them be bickering road trip companions/a killer squad/tentative allies who eventually form a real bond#i SWEAR if the writers go full parent/child bs with them in s2 because they're more popular#(at least on ao3. i don't expect the same level of insanity from the general audience)#than the canon ship i'll riot. idt they will but still#..... maybe they should go for a hot max/lucy/coop polycule instead. that would be interesting lmao#vaultghoul#fallout#val rambles in the tags#val speaks#txt
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