#she really said ‘i know i’m the baddest bitch’

[queensilvy]

*the intro to Dancing Queen*

Queen Silvia of Sweden almost immediately:

+ bonus silvy:

[ham1lton]

omg i had a similar idea about how yn’s birthday would be what exposed lewisyn but i didn’t send it bc i didn’t think you’d like it 🫣🫣🫣 i was just thinking that he’d get her something REALLY nice and everyone’s like 🤨🤔 whose boss would get them this….(as a kpop girlie my headcanon was that he flies her to coachella to see blackpink vip LMAO but honestly your choice)

author’s note: LEWISYN LEWISYN *we all chant in unison*. this is a part of the dream girl universe but can be read as a stand alone! also i’m posting the oscaryn fic tomorrow! so keep an eye out for that :D

liked by bestie1, alexandrasaintmleux and 728,928 others.

yourusername: when your boss pays for an all inclusive holiday for you and your girls for your birthday, but you miss his dog so you force him to send you updates every day 😔

view all 47,982 comments

user1: happy bday girl but this isn’t normal 😭

-> user2: bye she’s so real for this because if i could get exclusive lewis hamilton selfies I WOULD 😭

user3: you posted a darry ring box on your story? who bought it for you?

-> yourusername: lewis! :)

-> user4: hey babe… that’s literally INSANE

-> user5: idgi? what’s a darry ring? why is it insane? it’s just jewellery 🤷🏾‍♀️

-> user4: you can only buy ONE darry ring per LIFETIME. they make you submit your id so you can never buy another. it’s meant to be for your soulmate 😭 and lewis bought one for his ASSISTANT 😭

-> user5: nah, they GOTTA be fucking.

-> user4: worse. they’re in love.

carmenmmundt: HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEET GIRL ♥️

-> yourusername: i can’t even believe it but thank you babe!!! mwah!! we’ll go out as soon as i come back!!! :D

-> user6: my fav wags :(( gonna miss yn when lewis goes to ferrari :((

bestie1: HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BESTIE!!! SEXIEST GIRL EVER!!!!!!11!!!111

*liked by yourusername.*

user19: people talking about the darry ring like what about the HOLIDAY TO HER FAVOURITE PLACE??? like that is literally CRAZY???

-> user19: … you hiring? lewishamilton 👀

-> user21: fuck that, do you have an opening in your relationship? lewishamilton yourusername? 👀 bitch scooch over!! i want y’all 🤷🏻‍♀️

user20: what f1 driver wants to have a weird codependent relationship with a romantic subtext with me?

-> user21: i didn’t realise how much of a wattpad ass trope lewisyn is 😭 rich older famous hot boss and younger funny pretty employee who does whatever she wants while the boss is just fondly endeared.

-> user22: THAT SHOULD BE ME!!!!! 😔

-> user20: we can still do it oscarpiastri

-> oscarpiastri: no thank you! 🙂‍↔️

user28: yourusername are you and lewis dating be honest?

-> yourusername: NO 😭 i am definitely still single. lewis and i are just close friends that’s it!

-> user29: he said ‘happy birthday to my favourite girl, i want to spend all the rest of them with you’ in his post to you…. THATS A BOYFRIEND ASS QUOTE DONT LIE 😭

-> yourusername: that’s really normal??? like i’m sorry that you don’t have a decent relationship with your boss? 😭

user10: this whole bday thing is so funny cause why is yn trying to pass this as a normal employee and employer relationship 😭

-> user11: like you don’t see charles taking his assistant on romantic candlelit dinners do you 😭

-> user12: maybe if he does that, he’ll win a wdc. lewis does it, and he won eight, to ME!

user26: her insta stories are packed with all the gifts he bought her omg. someone tallied it all up and why did it amount to 2.7 million?!????

-> user27: IM SO JEALOUS

alexandrasaintmleux: next time brunch is on me ! 🥰 happy birthday honey 💕

-> yourusername: ily alex :(

-> user7: 1644 got the baddest bitches i know that’s right!

user13: lewisyn be normal challenge: FAILED!

-> user14: lewisyn be hopelessly in love with each other and co-parent lewis’ dog together challenge: COMPLETE!

user15: everyone talking about how weird it is that lewis spoils yn for her bday but why can’t we NORMALISE this?????? i want MY lazy ass boss to see shit like this and feel so ashamed that he books me on a cruise or some shit 😭

user17: LEWISYN CONFIRMED !!! WE CHEERED !!

-> user18: did you see his birthday post to her? babe it’s BEEN confirmed 😭

user24: im new to this. is yn lewis’ wag?

-> user25: no! she’s his assistant.

-> user24: don’t believe it. sorry.

user16: to everyone thinking this is weird, lewis’ team are like family to him. yn has been with him for almost a decade. like ofc he’s gonna reward loyalty? especially when she’s gotten offers from other celebs and brands. she could have pivoted to being an influencer but she likes working for lewis and it’s clearly mutual?

*liked by yourusername.*

landonorris: did you get my flowers?

-> yourusername: no?? :(

-> lewishamilton: roscoe ate them. my bad.

-> user8: MESSY ASS 😭 that dog did not eat those damn flowers.

-> user9: roscoe at home rn like … what he say fuck me for 🐶

-> yourusername: dw lando!! we’ll still have our weekly movie night when i come back!!

-> landonorris: :D

— dream girl taglist: @flowergirl1134 @laur20a23 @greantii @rafebun @sumlovesjude @papayadays

— all works taglist: @luvsforme @yelenasloverrrrr @donttouchthegnote @chelle1306 @bloodyymaryyy @aliciaablueprint @lennnooshh @km-23mr @stinkyjax @f1kenzzz @ctrlyomomma @theblueblub @lavisenri @marshmummy @23victoria @ourlifeforchaos @namgification @tallrock35 @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @ariellovelynn @shhhchriss @lifeless-firefly @xylinasdiary @evie-119 @itseightbeats @tsireyasgf @landososcar @yongi-lee @maxlarens @velentine @m1892 (if you were on more than one of the taglists, i’ve only tagged you once! :) also if you’re on the solo lewis taglist, i’ll tag you in the mentions as tumblr limits mentions at 50 per post!! :( and if you’d like to join either taglist, fill out this form! make sure you read the explanatory box, fill the form out correctly and allow your account to be tagged or i can’t tag you!)

[nuhoney1hunnit]

isn’t it great how our lizard brains have evolved to remember stuff that people say offhandedly weeks or even years later and not important things from 5 minutes ago?

love that shit!

[milessluvr]

ILL CUT THE BITCH !

꒰ ꒱ pairing : e42!miles morales x black!reader

꒰ ꒱ warnings : use of the N word cursing talking shit kissing lamme know if i miss any

꒰ ꒱ a/n : nicki was on my mind while makin this i feel like this was lazy asf short also💀

“Girl say you lyin, she fucked the the whole football team?? bitch probably got STD’s.” Alyssa spoke in shock looking at y/n waiting for her reply.

“Yeah ! But she called me the slut for dating miles ? Like bitch just say you’re jealous and go on with your life..” y/n said fixing her eyelashes.

“For real like.. bitches be jealous now and days because you the baddest bitch in the whole school and dating the hottest nigga on campus.” Alyssa spoke closing her locker and walking away with y/n still talking about that one bitch.

Few couple of periods later it was already lunch looking around miles going behind the school seeing a tall shadow seeing its miles.

“Miles ! Baby where was you I looked everyone for you!” Y/n asked wrapping her arms around his neck kissing he’s face leaving lipstick around his face.

“My bad ma, had to beat a nigga ass for you since he was peaking a lil too much around my girl.” Miles put his phone away in his pocket also wrapping a arm around y/n waist putting her in closer

“Was it that ugly nigga James? That nigga needa shut his ugly ass up.” Y/n said rolling her eyes putting on her lipgloss

“Yeah I heard something about sum girl talking shit about us ?” Miles asked sitting down and looking at y/n wanting her answer

“Yeah this bitch got jealous because I’m dating you while being the baddest bitch on campus and on the block?? she wanna be me so bad !” Y/n said laughing hard.

“But she know she fucked the WHOLEE football team she will never be a bad bitch like me “ y/n laughing even harder

“Plus after all of that fucking her ugly ass probably got STDs with her lil nappy ass hair she really is in love with me !” y/n said starting to dance a lil bit then Miles came behind her dancing right with her

“Damn right ma, remember what nicki Minaj said, I’ll cut the bitch “

@ entox 2023 don’t copy or steal my shit !

[earthtoharlow]

SERIES MASTERLIST

Previous Chapter

yourinsta just posted to their story!

THESHADEROOM

liked by 478,085 users

theshaderoom: #TSRBreakups: Looks like things may be over for #Drake and #Y/N Y/L. According to @tmz_tv, the two have separated after almost two years of dating. The former couple share a child together.

view all 6789 comments

user: ok maybe she’s the problem

user: probably because she’s fucking that Urban guy

user: we been knew she never keeps a man

user: Y/N just wakes up one day and be like “unhand me, get out.”

user: She really hasn’t been the same since Jack

user: what if Jack is her soulmate

user: she just needs to focus on herself and be the best mom she can be

user: Jack is unusually quiet during all this

THATGIRLSTACEY

liked by jackharlow, cassie, iamkaylanicole, joiechavis, diddy, ladylondon, meekmill, djdrama and 697,368 others

thatgirlstacey: “Willow darling, go grab daddy’s Amex and tell him you’re going shopping with mommy cause we have some celebrating to do” 🤣❤️‍🔥

view all 9,578 comments

user: your karma is coming bitch just wait

user: nasty individual

user: teaching your daughter how to be a hater and a weirdo….?

user: Y/N put her through hell and now she can celebrate her downfall????

user: caption crazy 🤣

user: anyone scared of how Jack is going to react

user: notice how you asked Willow to get Jack’s card and not yours, cause you’re broke!!

YOURINSTA

liked by urbanwyatt, flomillishit, summerwalker, saweetie, kehlani, druski, 1dessdior and 789,468 others

yourinsta: Broke up with em and a bitch just got badder

view all 12,688 comments

user: um

user: so tmz was right damn

user: don’t tell me Drake fumbled!!!

user: the baddest 🔥

saweetie: love you sister ❤️‍🔥

user: well that explains why she didn’t publicly wish him a happy Father’s Day

user: damn well anyway it’s my turn

user: you can not keep a man to save your life on god

user: man fuck all that noise!! You look fine af

user: single looks good on you

user: that momma weight 🥰

CHAMPAGNEPAPI

Liked by neelamthadhani, icespice, partynextdoor, chubbsview, ayeshacurry,nemoachida, thedanielclark, druski, and 1,425,116 others

champagnepapi: There’s no ribbon givin’ to anyone that you dealt with. No badge of honor, no ceremony or benefits, I gotta start us up a support group with a membership.

comments are turned off

URBANWYATT

liked by yourinsta, selenosunni, joeywagner, cozane, yungmiami305, SZA, dojacat, jharlowupdates, and 467,086 others

urbanwyatt: when you convince your best friend and god daughter to leave Canada and move in with you in Kentucky >>>

view all 7,679 comments

user: Jack still hasn’t said anything y’all, I’m scared

user: Y/N back in Kentucky???? Stacey and Jack are going crazy I’m sure

yourinsta: don’t know what i’d without you 🥹

user: Stacey will be commenting in…

user: 3…2…1

thatgirlstacey: you got a lot of nerve! this exactly why Jack isn’t speaking to you…what kind of friend are you

thatgirlstacey: glad you’re out our lives

thatgirlstacey: never liked you

user: that didn’t take long

user: oh the karma that’s gonna hit Stacey is going to be amazing

urbanwyatt: won’t engage with the foolishness going on in my comments but I will say this. I’ll go to war for @yourinsta and if you got a problem with her you have a problem with me. Don’t need anyone in my life that doesn’t love or appreciate her

user: FINISH HER!!!

user: I know she’s sitting there gagged 🤣🫵

user: GET HER AGAIN FOR ME!

***

An: hated breaking them up i really did, I promise :) Who leaked the voicemail any guesses??? 🫣 Months ago an anon gave me the idea of a voicemail leaking, kisses to you anon 🫶

also a bitch just hit 900 followers that’s insane!!!! thank you all so much I can't believe this 🥹🫶 thanks to everyone who reads, comments, likes my work. It means so much to me

Tag List:

(message me if you’d like to be added or removed)

@heavyhitterheaux @hoodharlow @neon-lights-and-glitter @babiefries @toocriticalharlow @mace23477 @jackmans-poison @dstark-0706 @harlowsbby @itsyagirljaz @leftapricotprofessorlover @comehomeimissyou @minkookie95 @harlowcomehome @jackharloww @jaydaaasworld @blossomluvv​ @fdl305 @khiyah @kkrenae

[ethanlandryshotwife]

All I wanted was you | Xavier T.

Summary: All Y/n wanted was Xavier.

pairings: Xavier Thorpe x Fem!reader

warnings: Cursing and like rude comments ig??? No smut u lil weirdos (I was reading smut like 2 minutes ago but whatever)

Enemies to lovers??

_____

I hate Xavier Thorpe.

I hate all the stupid things he says. All the unnecessary comments he makes. 

Sometimes I want to kiss him, but the other times I just want to bash his head into the fucking wall. 

Every guy that has tried to ask me out I rejected because of him, I only wanted him. He just won’t get what I’m trying to tell him. Most of my friends know about the feelings I’ve developed.

It’s stupid. I’m tired of acting like I hate him. When I don’t.

“What are you thinking about?” Xavier says from next to me. Right now we are in Ms. Thornhill's class. She gave us assigned seats and mine was next to Xavier's.

“Thinking of the best possible way I can kill you in your sleep and get away with it,” I reply to him. Snarky, like always.

“Aww, you’re thinking about me.” He teases. You don’t even know, Thorpe.

I chuckle in response.

If only I could get him out of my fucking head. It’s like I’m being haunted. “What plant is this?” Xavier asks shoving his paper in my face. Gosh, he is so stupid sometimes.

“It’s the bleeding heart, we have been learning about it this whole week, idiot,” I explained it to him. “How is learning about stupid ass plants going to help us in life anyway.” He remarked mostly talking with his hands.

I’ve always noticed that.

“It will help you if you decide to go out into the wilderness Mr.Thorpe.” Ms.Thornhill overhears from her desk “Now, do your work.” She adds then goes back to grading papers.

I quietly laugh. “Bitch.” He mutters.

____

“Let's go shopping for the Rave’n.” This is the sentence that brought me here watching Enid twirling around in her perfect white dress.

“Do you like it?” She asks, for the 100th time “Yea, its cute.” I reply. I’m not trying to be a bad friend or anything but I just don’t really care about the dress or the Rave’n overall, I don’t even think I’m going.

“You keep saying that!” She pouts like a child “Anyways, what are you going to wear?” She questions me. 

My PJs, then I’m getting into my bed and going to sleep.

“Um, I don’t think I’m going,” I answer honestly. I know she's going to freak out. “What do you mean!” She yells.

“I just don’t really feel like it this year Enid, I’m sorry.” I apologize. “Nope, you are going. Even if I have to drag you there with my own paws.” She threats. “Please don’t make me,” I beg already knowing where this is going.

2 minutes later I’m in a spaghetti strap white dress with a slit on the leg.(the photo is at the bottom, or Imagine whatever you want idgaf)

“Its perfect.” Enid squeals “we’re going to be the baddest looking bitches in the room.” She snickered. Oh lord save me.

____

“Put the heels on before I hit you.” Is what echoes off of my dorm walls right now.

currently, Enid is forcing me to put heels on. I promised myself I would fight back, but it wasn’t enough against Enid's wrath and her claws. 

I internally cried as I slipped on the white heels. “Gorgeous,” Enid says looking at both of us in the mirror. If only I felt it.

“My goal tonight is to make Ajax jealous,” Enid says. She has been mad at him ever since he stood her up and considering the way he talks about her something obviously happened.

“What is your goal?” She asks me. To stay away from Xavier as best as I can. “To sneak away when you’re not looking.” I answer causing her to giggle.

A knock on the door stops her giggling, “He’s here.” she squeals running to the door “Who?” I say. What is this girl planning? “Well, I found some people who didn’t have dates and.....” Enid trails. 

“What!” I yell. I wanted to go by myself, not with some horny teenage boy.

“Who are the ‘people’?” I ask her. It better not be some jackass.

“Kent and that guy from the pilgrim world.” She answers before I can say anything she opens the door. Just like she said Kent and Lucas are standing at the door. “Hey guys, we were just finishing up.” She says.

She set me up with Kent. He asked me how to spell ‘you’ last year. God, I’m going to kill her.

My heels click against the hard floor under me as I walk. “Let's go!” Enid squeals practically running down the hall. I try my best to catch up with her in these heels.

I almost fall over a few times but I managed to catch up with her at the doors. “Come on!” She says dragging me into the door leaving are dates. “Welcome to The Rave’n girls.” Ms.Thornhill says with a creepy welcoming smile.

“Let's go get some Yeti-tini.” She shouted over the loud music. She grabs my hand and we walk over to the stand. I end up bumping into someone while waiting for her to fill our cups.

“Sorry,” I say before I meet the eyes of the person. It was Xavier, in a white suit and his hair down like usual. (Kill that man bun it was triggering the first time I saw it.)

“You actually look good for once.” He says while looking at my outfit. For once? “Well, you kinda look like that old man from KFC,” I reply.

“Touché.” He snickers “Look who has been paying attention in french, I’m proud.” I say giving him a little clap “Only took me 2 days to learn, a new record.” He laughs.

I look next to me and Enid has disappeared. “You here with anyone?” He adds. So much for staying away from him tonight. “I mean I guess not, my supposed date is making out with someone right now.” I say pointing to Kenny making out with a girl I don’t know.

“What about you?” I ask “Not really I pissed her off and she ran.” he explains earning a hum from me. Who is his date?

“Want to dance?” He says changing the subject. I can’t dance for shit. “I don’t see why not.” I answer.

Unexpectedly he grabs my hand and leads me to the middle of the dance floor. Life just seems to love me right now because as soon as we hit the middle of the floor it turns into a slow song.

 “I’ve never slow danced in my life.” I tell him with panic on my face. “Just follow me.” He says as if we’re in some movie “People only say that in movies following you isn't helping shit.” I explain to him, I’m most likely going to bust my ass.

He starts laughing as I trip over my own foot “Shut up.” I say hitting him upside the head and making him laugh harder. I wish a hole would just swallow me whole right now.

“Do you just want to get out of here?” He asks.

“yea, but we better run before End attacks us.” I tell him he smiles in response. He takes my hand and leads me out of the dance.

Me and Xavier end up on the balcony that overlooks the quad. I usually hang out here when I’m not in the mood to hang out with my friends. 

Silence fills the air as we look over the balcony “You know I don’t actually hate you.” Xavier says out of nowhere. “I guess you’re okay.” I say sarcastically rolling my eyes causing Xavier to chuckle.

“The argument I got into with my date was about you.” Xavier confesses. “talking about me, eh?” I ask. I don't recall doing anything to Xavier or his date, I don’t think.

He laughs.

“I just felt like you needed to know.” He tells me “What did I do to start the argument?” I ask him. “You didn’t do anything, it’s my fault.” He answers.

“I’m so confused.” I giggle. Did I do something to his date? “She said I talked about you too much.” He says.

Oh.

“Can I do something?” He asks me “Go ahead, Mr.Thorpe.” I say. I don't know what I expected him to do, but it most certainly wasn't this.

Xavier gently put his lips on mine. It felt like finally eating food you have been carving for a long time.

Sadly Xavier pulled away to breathe. Our noses touching “I think I kinda like you.” He admits. “Kinda?” I ask.

If only you knew, Xavier.

____

Words;1,440

Taking request!

Damn this took all night my back hurts. Btw I apologize I was very bored so I wrote this, I’m begging you if I spelled something wrong tell me bc its so embarrassing. Anyways I think ima start a kill Xavier's man bun cult what do you think?

The dress and heels or whatever u want idc<3

[eddies-whoreee]

Traitor (1/2)

Summary: Eddie chose Chrissy over you. You couldn’t stand see them together so you left. In those 2 years you’ve been gone, he realized you are the love of his life and he made a huge mistake.

CW: angst, mean!eddie, bitchy!Chrissy, lots of crying, happy ending (eventually). BASED IN MODERN TIMES!!

Hawkins, July 2020

“What? Eddie I thought-” you say as tears fall down your face. “Look, I’m just not in the mindset to be in a relationship its me not you, okay?” He tells you. You shake your head, “w-why? What happened, w-was it something I did?” You question, tears now pour down your face as he just stared at you, no emotion what so ever. “I just told you, I just can’t be in a relationship.” He states more harshly, rolling his eyes. “It’s her, isn’t it. It’s Chrissy” you ask. “Oh my God, Y/n, please you’re being paranoid! My mental health is all fucked up and you think im cheating!?! Wow you’re really selfish” he snaps at you. “No! That’s not what I’m saying, Eddie I do care!” You speak. He holds the bridge of his nose and let’s out a frustrated sigh. “Just-please, we’re done okay? It’s over I can’t-” he says walking away. Leaving you, heart broken, crying, and mostly confused in your driveway.

2 weeks later

You were walking to lunch with your best friend Robin, who had been comforting you the past 2 weeks. That’s when you see it, “what the fuck” you mumble stopping in your tracks. Robin looks at you confused and follows your gaze. Her face drops, tears flood your eyes and you turn around storming off. She follows after you calling out for you. You guys get into the girls bathroom when you completely break down. “He said, they were just friends! He said I was paranoid” you sob into her hug. “I know babes I’m so sorry” she says rubbing your back soothingly. “I can’t believe him, I thought- I thought he loved me” you state. “He’s an asshat that lost the baddest bitch ever, not that you are a bitch. Chrissy’s a two faced cunt anyways it won’t last long” she tries to assure you. “That’s not the point! He told me that he wasn’t ready mentally for a relationship, and then suddenly two weeks later he’s in a relationship with the same girl he told me not to worry about” you tell her. “He such a slut!” You exclaim. “Totally slut” Robin agrees.

Hawkins, August 2020

Robin sat leaned on the side of your car as you loaded one of your boxes into your trunk. “Babes are you sure this is the best decision?” She asks worriedly. “I can’t stand to see them and I need a break from the Hawkins gossip. Its toxic, plus my aunt has been begging me to come down with her forever so..” you trail off. She nods, “I’m gonna miss you, like a lot. You’re the only person who doesn’t suck in this town” she says. “Hey! Okay that hurt!” Steve exclaims loading the last box into your trunk. “Thanks Steve” you tell him. He nods. “Okay even you suck sometimes Steve, and Y/n has been my bestie since kindergarten so… it’s different” Robin explains. He rolls his eyes playfully. You sigh closing the trunk. “Well, guys I guess this is it. All packed up and ready to go” you say. Robin nods tears filling her eyes. “Don’t cry, then I’m gonna cry” you state tears already starting to form. She gives you a hug tears spilling on your shirt, you didn’t care though. “Don’t forget about me please, I couldn’t handle it” she jokes. “Hell no, you always find away to invade my thoughts” you giggle. “Stevie? Why are you covering your face?” You asks concerned. “My eyes are sweating” he says. “Aww are you gonna miss me Stevie” you tease. “Something like that” he speaks. You give him a hug. “Your killing me smalls” he jokes returning your hug. As you pull away, steve quickly wipes his tears. “I love you guys, okay? I’ll be back one day. Okay this isn’t forever” you tell them. They nod, “okay farewell my fellow friends” you say then wave as you get in the car.

Hawkins, November 2022

You step out of the car, letting out a sigh of relief. For the first time in a longtime you were actually happy to be in Hawkins. You unlock the door to your moms house, it was completely pitch black. You tried to flip the light on but it wouldn’t turn on. “Surprise!!” Your friends shout as the lights turn on, you jump and let out a yelp. “Holy fucking shit!! What the fuck?!?” You giggle. “Welcome home!” Robin exclaims giving you a very aggressive hug. “Hey bestie” you tell her, she pulls back inspecting you. “Have you grown 6 feet? Did you get new hair?” She questions. “No just got over a breakup, you know I have my glow back” you state happily. She nods pulling you into another hug. “Hey Robin share the wealth we miss her too” Steve says, Robin sighs rolling her eyes and letting you go. “Hey kiddo” Steve says pulling you into a hug. “I’m the same age as you!” You tell him. “But your like 10 feet shorter than me so..” he states making you giggle. “I hate you” you joke. The door bell rings, Steve looks at the door confused. “Are we expecting someone?” He asks looking at the rest of the party. They all shake their head ‘no’. “I’ll get it. Be right back” he says patting your head as he walks to the door. Robin and Dustin lead you into the kitchen showing you the master meal they were preparing that was only minutes away from being done. “You need to go” Steve says angrily. “Just let me see her, it’s important” some one replies pleadingly. “As important as cheating on her with Chrissy and breaking her heart?” Steve states. There was a moment of silence. “That’s what I thought.. leave. Now.” Steve tells the person. Their conversations were muffled but you could make the words out. You walk from the kitchen to see who it was. You freeze in your steps, your heart raced and tears were working their way into your eyes. “Baby, Y/n, please just 2 minutes that all I need” he begs. “Eddie? How did you know I was back?” You ask trying to keep the tears from falling. “It’s a small town and that’s all Robin and Steve talk about, and I visit Family Video a lot” he says. “Look, just tell me you don’t want him here and he’s gone” Steve tells you. You fiddle with your fingers knowing you would probably regret this decision. “It’s fine. It’ll only be 2 minutes” you speak walking to the door. “Outside” you say walking out. Eddie nods shutting the door behind you. You take a seat on the porch swing. Eddie sits next to you. He tries to put a hand on your thigh, but you scoot away from his touch. “I made a horrible mistake. Like the biggest mistake ever. I love you, you’re the love of my life” he says. You scoff shaking your head, “I’ve heard that before” you tell him. “I know, I know, it’s just I’m an asshole okay?” He states. “I gathered that” you speak rolling your eyes. “So why do you want me back now? Did she break your heart, you figure out that being with her isn’t pure paradise? Let me guess she treated you like her puppet?” You question bitterly. He doesn’t say anything knowing you were right.

Hawkins, October 2020

“Ughh Eddie that isn’t the point you can’t go to the party dressed as the joker if I’m not Harley Quinn! You will be Bugs Bunny and you’ll have a smile on your face the whole time!” She spits at him. “Baby, I don’t want-” he’s cut off by her scoff. “It isn’t about what you want! I’m head cheerleader! Okay? Having you as a charity case is bad enough. I can’t have you ruining Halloween too” she states angrily. “Wow, so that’s what I am a fucking charity case” Eddie asks. “Well I’m not dating you because I love you and want to get married” she snickers fixing up her makeup. He scoffs shaking his head. “Well then have fun going to the party with Jason, because I’m done, with you, this bullshit, Y/n was right your a cold hearted bitch” Eddie snaps at her. She turns around and narrows her eyes at him. “You can’t break up with me 30 minutes before the damn party! Jason is going with Cynthia! I cant go alone!” She exclaims. “Too bad find another charity case, get out” Eddie tells her. “Wait I’m sorry I didn’t mean it Eddie, c’mon-” she tries to speak but Eddie cuts her off. “Nope leave! God you’re actually a horrible person” he says tears forming his eyes. But not from his and Chrissy’s break up but from the fact he knew he fucked up. He was always happy with you. You never made him feel less. “Whatever you will never find someone better than me!” She screams storming out. He sighs as he hears the door slam. He plops down on the bed and cries, he feels like a fucking child, an immature, stupid child.

Hawkins, May 2021

He walks into Family Video going to buy your favorite movie since it was your birthday and you always loved 10 Things I Hate About You. As he walks up from to the register putting the movie on the counter. “Hm, her favorite movie, doing some sulking from losing the best thing that ever happened to you?” Robin asks bitterly. “This isn’t very good costumer service” Eddie states. “You know if I wanted to which I really should I could refuse service to you, since I have the right to” she replies with a fake smile pointing to the sign. He rolls his eyes. “Can I just get the damn movie” he speaks frustratedly. “Sure that’ll be $13.99” she says. “What? the price says 8.99” he tells her. She snickers, “oh you get the douche fee.” He scoffs and hands her a 10 dollar bill. “Good one Buckley, how’s Vickie?” He smirks, “how’s Chrissy?” She snaps back. He tenses up. “Bye-bye loser” she states with a smile. “Fuck off” he mumbles grabbing the movie and walking out.

Hawkins, July 2021

He sat in his living room plopped down on the couch. This was about the 100th time he watch you favorite movie just in this month alone. As Wayne entered the house he sighed seeing the movie playing and his nephew snuggling up with one of your shirts. “Boy, this again?” He asks. Eddie jumps and pushes your shirt away. “What? No- I- just” he tries to lie but Wayne huffs. “It’s your fault, you broke that sweet girl’s heart. Now you’re getting a taste of your own medicine” he tells him bluntly. “I know Wayne, trust me I’ve been contemplating my whole life’s decisions since that day” Eddie replies annoyingly. “So why are you sulking” Wayne questions. “Because I love her! I fucked up, exactly a year ago today I made the worst mistake of my life. You should’ve seen how heart broken she was, god, every time I close my eyes all I see is her crying because I broke her heart.” Eddie exclaims tears flowing down his face. Wayne did hate to see his nephew sad, but this was his own fault. Wayne didn’t raise Eddie to be a heart breaker. He raised him to respect and treat women like queens and Eddie just screwed up, no way to sugar coat that. “I miss her Wayne” Eddie says. “Yeah, I do too son” Wayne sighs walking into the bathroom. Eddie lays back staring at the ceiling.

Hawkins, November 2022

“Eddie you really hurt me. I gave you everything, you were my first everything! And you just…hurt me” you tell him. He sighs wiping away the tear that poured down his face. “Look I’m not asking for you to take me back, or even forgive me. I just want you to give me another chance, I know I don’t deserve it. I don’t deserve you. You are too good for me, you loved me at my worst when everyone hated me you were there and I fucked up. I know it. Just let me make what I can up to you. I know I’ll never fully be able to win all the trust I used to have back but just let me make you feel how special you make me feel” he pleads. “Why did you do it?“ you question. “Because.. I thought people would look at me different if I was with her, I thought for once people would actually treat me like a decent human being instead of judging me for my last name. It’s not a good reason, no reason would be. But it’s the truth and I’m done lying to you” he says looking down at the ground. “Did you c-cheat?” You asks. “Hell no, I never cheated. No. I would never” he states looking at you. “But you talked to her while we were together? You wanted her while you were with me?” You question. “Yes, but I never stopped loving you, not for one second. I was just tired, of being labeled the freak, Jason and his mouth breathing clan fucking with me. People looking down on me. But I thought that if I had the head cheerleader on my side, that would change everything. What I did was completely selfish. And I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” He apologizes, holding your hand. “Times up Munson” Steve says as he walks out the door. You stand up wiping your tears away. Eddie sighs and nods standing up. He goes in for a hug but you back up. You hold out your fist for a bump. He bumps your fist. “I love you, bye” he says walking to his car. You watch him and huff. “Love you too” you mumble and walk in the house.

THERE WILL BE A PART 2!! THE FINAL PART HAPPEY ENDINGS ARE TO COME!! SHOULD I END WITH SOME SMUT OR NO?? I can’t decide!!

[kymerawrites]

Maffia boss! x Simon Riley

I’m way to creative, needed a small break from sir Simon Riley as I have ALOTT of ideas

I was the daughter of one of the most rich and powerful people in underworld. Too bad I was a daughter and not the son yet my mother couldn’t conceive any children after me my dad was doomed with a woman taking over his business, and I was fucking great at it.

Because of me, his empire expended way beyond Cartagena, Colombia. I got our secret formula in the USA, England, Seychelles South France, Brazil, China, Australia, and many more countries. We also had a lot of allies in politics because of me and the CIA I was booming in this business, and the people I partnered with were all crushing on me, I was the baddest bitch alive right now and everyone knew that. I was on top of the game and I liked to stay that way until I started playing a dangerous game with SAS, agent and member of the task force 141 Simon Riley.

My head was all over money. I only talked in money. I only loved money, and I only wanted money. I was a material girl I love anything that was expensive you could see it on me. I was really expensive looking woman and it made me felt super powerful. But now that I am on top of the game there are always the jealous motherfuckers that want to take you down.

“Do we have any information about this woman price?” All the task force and even general Shepard was in the meeting.

“ this is one of the most dangerous woman on our list right now Shym Medusa. She has one of the biggest maffia leaders in Colombia and has a very secretive formula of drugs that no one can find out and it makes people go to war. We need to take her down as soon as possible because she’s also overruling us.”

 Simon looked at the information “there’s no picture of her..”

Soap also agreed “how do we find a woman if we cannot even see the woman?”

Price sighed “ we also found el sin Nombre who was faceless in their business. This will be easy.”

 Simon looked again at the information on the screen. He was kind of impressed a woman doing after that on her own, and have been one of the strongest leaders in the world right now he wanted to find out who she was, and of course take her down.

He didn’t realize that it might be so easy to take her down, but it was way harder to actually take her down. They infiltrated her in Columbia in a club where they went out as regular guests one of the bars she saw her sitting with a whole team of people that were seen as her ‘family’ were a few of the most skillful, murderers, snipers fighters, and even some agents. She had a strong army with the task force one for one even be powerful enough to take them down?

 I was sitting on my regular table. We had a bunch of cash on the table almost too much to even count. This was my club when I implement my money and my hour into something I own it just like one of the many clubs, banks, and other things that I have taken over until I saw someone with a school mask and a bacalava sitting on across in the club. he was muscular and mysterious something pulled me towards him. He looked deep in the eye. Those eyes spoke something that I couldn’t catch.

I excuse myself from the table and walk towards the bar where I ordered a martini. I lit up a sigaret and looked at the man again, he stared me in the eye

“i’ve never seen you in my club before who are you? are you here to make a deal maybe because I’m talking cash right now.”

 Simon was in shock. This woman was magnificent, beautiful, and she had an aura that said I am that woman. She look confident like she’s bragging about it.

“I’m here for you miss medusa, but I don’t know what my goals are yet, I just wanted to see such a stunning woman like you.” 

“You’re playing a dangerous game doing business with me sir, it’s for the players who really want to play.”

Ghost nodded “I’m aware sugar.”

She looked him in the eye, tilting her head to side something about the way… the way he said Sugar made her impressed something not everyone could do, everyone who approached her, wasn’t that good for her, but somehow she was from this mysterious skeleton mask man.

I sipped my martini “what is your proposal? Do you have any allies or affiliates I need to know about to consider doing business with you?” 

Simon instantly fell questions. How would he play this off? She was maybe one of the most stunning person he’s ever seen, he gave her the thrills no one else could in a woman, he dated a few but they were all so mediocre, he saw something in her that stood out.

“ if you join me tonight there’s no going back, from now you’re my partner and you cannot leave so I suggest you think really good about the choice you’re going to make next.”

this was a big sacrifice, but it was needed for his team. The only word he said “I’m down to do business.”

“Very well..what is your name?”

“Call me ghost.”

LMK IF YOU WANT A PART 2 bc I know I can write this GREAT

[potentialguybodyswaps]

Halloween Party Swap:

The Halloween party between all the cool kids was just a few days away, and the winner of the costume party would supposedly get to bang Christine, she was the baddest bitch on campus, 5’6, D sized tits, the type of girl who had access to “mommies and daddy’s” money, everyone knew she had a lot of work done but that didn’t change from how fucking hot she was

How ever I didn’t really have a costume picked out… one of my buddies told me about this magic spell that could swap people’s bodies, reason he told me is cause he was gonna swap with this Chinese student who had a thick accent, and just go full stereotype and wear one of those straw hats the rice farmers use to wear in Asia, while also carrying around a rice cooker, asking people if they wanted rice

A few other people were running with this idea and so a lot of people already knew that not everyone is gonna be who they seem, so if they enter the contest they just gotta tell their real names

Now don’t get me wrong, my friend had a pretty good and pretty hilarious idea, it would really be hard to top that, but I think I could manage

I met up with the biggest nerd on campus, Davis, and told him about the party, he told me he already knew but also knew he wasn’t invited

“Bro if you help me with my costume, I’ll get you in, I promise” I said trying to convince him to come

“Ok, ya cool, I’d love to go to a party, what’s your costume” Davis said excitedly

“Um well you see Davis… I was hoping you could be my costume” I said continuing to explain the situation to him

He didn’t seem to buy it at first

“ so your telling me, you wanna swap bodies with me, dress extra nerdy, just to win some contest to fuck a chick?… quit fucking with me, everyone knows it’s not possible to swap bodies, and that magic doesn’t exist. grow up.” He said walking away

I continued to walk behind him and ask”come on bro, some of my other friends have already done it, why not, I mean you’d get to be me for a couple days”

“You know what?” He said stopping and turning around

If you want my body and can somehow use magic to swap us, sure I’d love to be you Brad ” he said turning around and continuing to his next class

“You won’t regret it” I yelled

Later that night before bed I starting looking at the spell online that my friend sent me, underneath it in some of the smallest font a computer can make, was a list of side effects

I had to zoom in just to see them, only thing that stuck out is if both individuals cum inside their bodies, the swap becomes permanent…

Now typically I would just, not jerk off in Davis’s body, but I’ve herd the stories, and apparently bro is a premature cummer, I’m talking like, just looking at too hot of a bitch could make him cum

So I did the only logical thing someone in my shoes would do, I went into my girlfriend’s drawer (well, she’s not really my girlfriend, but like a long term fling), and grabbed a chastity lock that my girl likes to use on me when she’s feeling extra kinky that night, and locked my cock in it and hid the key

It was a tight fit while soft and absolutely hurt while hard but I guess that’s the price he’ll have to pay if he wants to be me for a couple days

I proceeded to do the spell and nothing happened

I texted my friend who already did it with that Asian guy and asked what was up. He told me it takes effect while we’re sleeping, he then asked who I’d be swapping with, when I told him, he was a bit upset but proud of my idea “ dam bro, that’s a good one, I wish I would have thought about that”

So I decided I guess I should go to sleep, no better way to kill time right haha? I just wanna win this competition so bad so I can fuck Christine

The next day I woke up in a dorm that looked nothing like mine, all my posters of nude girls were gone (which I typically take down when I have girls over) and my posters of cars and shit

I instantly thought and new that it had to worked I got up feeling extremely boney and rushed to a mirror, the face that greeted me was this

Now typically someone that’s a hot certified fuck boi like myself would be upset they got swapped into a nerds body, but I was ecstatic. I mean ya I was ugly as shit and these braces looked fuck, man who in college still wears braces haha .

But man, I’m so gonna win this competition I said, getting dressed in a rush, not bothering to check out my crappy body.

I proceeded to go to the customs store and by a stereotype nerd costume to add to the “costume” I’m wearing now… white shirt with a pocket calculator, and pants held up by suspenders

As I was checking out at the register I started getting texts from my old body

“Hey um bro, I woke up in your body, I can’t believe it worked, this is crazy, but um, what’s this thing on my cock and how do I get it off, it kinda hurts my dick bro”

I smirked at the texts, I knew he’d want out of my chastity lock

“It’s a chastity lock, keeps you from pleasuring yourself, and you don’t… that’s the price you gotta pay if you want to be me” I replied putting my phone away and walking home with the costume in a bag

When I got home I had numerous texts from Davis, BEGGING me to get it unlocked

“ Brad come on dude, this hurts really bad and since I can’t jerk it, all I can do is keep staring and or adjusting it so it don’t hurt as much, doesn’t really help much but…”

“Brad, help me out here”

I decided to reply back and let him know why I can’t unlock it

“Look Davis, it’s there for a reason, If we both cum, we’re stuck like this and can’t swap back, and I’ve herd the stories about how just a girl talking to you can make you cum, so I’m not risking you jerking off in my body, and then me having a accident or something in yours… plus I’ve hidden the key so don’t think about trying to unlock it, that stays on untill we swap back, got it?”

“Ya got it, you’ve hidden the key so it stays on” he replied back

After that, I didn’t hear from David for the rest of the day…

Truthfully I’ve been holding in the urge to piss and shit all day, so once I got back to David’s dorm, I couldn’t take it anymore and rushed to the bathroom

As I’m blowin it up I have my eyes resting in my arms trying not to look at his junk but I caught a glimpse and had to look

“ no fucking way” I said as I removed an arm and took a look

“It’s so small it doesn’t even hang haha, this thing is pathetic, maybe like an inch soft, it kinda curls into itself” I said as I got done with natures call

“ I wonder how big it is hard” I thought to myself as imagined naked chicks

I watched as it grew to a pathetic 3 and a half inches

“Dam I would hate to be this guy haha” I said as I gave it a quick tug

That was a mistake, I almost blew it right there

“Jesus Christ, that was close, the rumors really undersold him, he’s not a premature cumer, he’s extremely premature” I said getting up making sure to be as careful as possible to not make myself cum.

………………………………………….

The night of the Halloween party came and I went, fully dressed in my nerd costume, suspenders and all

There was a lot of hot chicks around and at some point in the night they announced via the DJ that costume swaps that involved swapping we’re not gonna be counted in this years contest

“Man this is stupid” I said angrily walking to start getting drinks, that was probably the worst decision of the night because after an hour of drinking, I saw my body walk in, in this skeleton costume, now I shouldn’t be mad cause I did say I’d get him into the party, but what had me upset was the skeleton costume had an extra bone. My dick, he must have gotten out of the chastity lock somehow? Maybe he found the key?

I won’t lie, I was already hard from looking at all the hot chicks that I can’t fuck, mainly due to the rules of the swap, and due to how none of them wanna fuck this nerd…

But when I saw my body walk in, in that costume, displaying my dick though a costume I was gonna originally wear, and knowing I was disqualified myself from the contest, I let lose.

I got absolutely trashed, the last thing I remember before blacking out was Davis coming up to me an making small talk

“Hey bro, I herd they’re not counting swapped costumes this year” he said looking down at me

“Ya” I said looking up from my cup “so ima just drink my problems away and swap us back tomorrow night… I see you don’t have that chastity lock on anymore”

“Ya, I found the lock but I decided I’d need a costume and found this in your room, I’m guessing this was your original idea” he said giving his dick a quick pull.

“Ya” I said looking back down at my cup

Davis lightly slapped my arm and said “ aye don’t worry tho, I haven’t cummed yet, kinda hard staying erect for this costume all night haha”

“That’s good” I said, and then blacked out

I woke up in the middle of the night still drunk as fuck and couldn’t think straight

I saw Christine kissing my old body on the couch and got hard immediately

I rolled over to face them and whipped my dick our starting to slowly massage it

“Oh fuck ya, I always knew I’d end up with her” I said

“Christine looked over and without saying a word smacked my body to look this way”

Davis told her “it’s fine, he’s probably sexless and just living out some sick fantasy in his head, I mean maybe we should help him, how about instead of fucking tonight, we can just match him, and you can give me a hand job, and we can call it even if you want”

“Ok” she said putting back on her sexy face and proceeding to start giving Davis a hand job in my body

“Oh fuck this is so hot, a handjob from Christine, it feels so go-O-OD I said to myself cumming in my hand and falling asleep, not aware that I’m not actually me anymore and was just watching from Davis’s real body, not some out of body experience where I watch from the 3rd person

I awoke the next day with my pants down and my hand feeling Crusty,

“Ew, what happened last night?” I said to myself

I looked around and saw my body still on the couch, no longer with a boner, “Jesus how long did he hold that thing” I thought to myself

I reached over and threw a pillow at Davis’s head, waking him up

“ I’m up” he said frantically shooting upright

“Hey what happened last night” I said looking confused “why are my pants down”

“Oh you got drunk as fuck last night and jerked off last night on the couch” he said with a smile

“Oh shit did I? Well good save bro, I owe you one, I think ima get dressed and go home, we should be back to our normal selves tomorrow” I said getting up

“ I don’t think that’ll happen” Davis said standing up

“Woah woah why not?” I said looking concerned

He pointed down at his dick and I could see a white stain

“Did I mention you jerked off to Christine making out with me, and then proceeded to give me a handjob when she saw you jerking to us?” He said with a smile on his face

“How was it, was it worth the cumming” he said seeming excited at me slowly piecing things together

“I-I-don’t remember, you just let her jerk you off bro? Did you finish? Please tell me no”

“ dam that’s ashame, you seemed so satisfied after you lasted way longer than I typically do, you lasted about 2 minutes, there wasn’t a lot of cum at all but, hey, it still happened” he said smirking

“And I won’t say I did cum, but I also won’t say I didn’t, I think the stain in your costume answers that question pretty well hahahaha” he said laughing with the biggest shit eating grin I’ve ever seen

“ man, sorry you couldn’t help yourself last night but neither could I, I mean it’s not all bad tho, I get to stay as a bonafide fuck boi, this couldn’t have ended better for me” he said turning and walking out the door, leaving me to ponder what exactly went wrong last night tripping me in his nerdy body

#Edit I know this is a little out of season but I’ve been saving this story for awhile and just find it too hot not to post, hope tumblr don’t block it, if so it’ll have to wait till my patreon

[asteria7fics]

I’m feeling uncharacteristically sentimental right now, so I’m gonna capitalize on it and make my personal RANT girl appreciation post! (*ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)

As I’m sure many of you have seen, I’ve found myself with the incredible fortune of befriending three of the coolest girlies that allow me to be utterly INSANE in chat. They are THE hype masters, and honestly I don’t think I would have even considered posting RSB had they not all boosted my confidence with their encouragement.

If you’re somehow unaware of my wonderful RANT Park girlies, then let me introduce you while I muse about how talented and wonderful they all are!!!

@1moreoffkeyanthem

Riley, the first letter and for me, the person that started it all. I don’t think I would have ever met the other girls had she not been so lovely in the comments of TSOB in its earliest chapters. Just knowing that someone out there was finding something to enjoy in my silly, self-indulgent fic really kept me going, both with continuing to post TSOB and during the drafting process of EWILY.

There’s a reason I’m constantly screaming at you guys to read Riley’s work. Every fic hits. Every. Single. One, and the queen has MANY to choose from. I have yet to find a PCE fic that I didn’t thoroughly enjoy. Between the beautiful prose, the perfect character dynamics and the level of creativity required to not only create deeply engrossing AUs, but to make so many of them bite-sized and easily digestible. I frequently marvel at her ability to pull me into her worlds in just a few sentences, every single time.

Don’t even get me started on the quality of whump. I’m not even a whump girl, or at least I never thought I was but man, I really am not joking when I say I think I’ve been converted. Riley helped me see the light you guys, and she can help you see it, too.

I’ve said it once, and I’ll say it a million times more. IF YOU AREN’T READING PCE WHAT ARE YOU EVEN DOING???

And you can read Riley’s work right here!

@alwaysinstyle

Ana, the sickfic queen herself. Walking hand in hand through the hurt/comfort tag with Riley and absolutely carrying the fandom on their backs while they do it. The day Ana joined Tumblr was the day everything truly came together, and we literally would not shut up about missing her for the week that she was away from us!!!

Though I’ve only been able to scratch the surface of Ana’s writing, I am already consistently blown away by her works. She may very well be the smartest person I have ever met, and my god does she bring that incredible intelligence to everything she writes. Always the perfect word, always the most beautiful flow and poignant moments that have made me frequently and audibly gasp. I mean it when I say my greatest shame is that I hadn’t started reading her work sooner.

When I tell you guys that you need to bring tissues to the function when Ana is there, I MEAN IT!! Do not take this warning lightly!!! You WILL cry, and you’ll be better for it. The catharsis I feel after every chapter of Hourglass is simply unmatched.

Which you can read here, along with Ana’s other works, of which there are also a great many!

@boxwinebaddie

Nina, the baddest bitch on the block who has undoubtedly been subjected to the most insanity from me. I still laugh when I think about how wild it is that our first conversation was us bonding over fucking Saltburn, but I also fear it says a whole lot about why we get along so well. NASTY! GIRLS!!!

One does not simply read Nina’s work. Her works are an experience, the likes of which I don’t think this fandom has ever seen before, or may ever see again. I don’t believe anyone will ever be able to replicate the biting wit and emotionally devastating prose that she has given us, nor has any other fic made me cackle the way hers do. I’m serious you guys, she is HILARIOUS when she isn’t literally ripping my heart out with her dangerously powerful angst.

Despite being someone who loves the challenge of sticking as close to canon as possible, I am an absolute sucker for the ways that Nina pushes every single character in new and fascinating directions. Non-canon compliant done SO right, and I think that anyone that’s feeling worn down by derivative angst in the fandom needs to give her fics a shot.

I will die on Ravesey hill, and if you’d like to join me you can read Nina’s works here!

It sounds silly to say as someone who writes as a hobby, but I really don’t think I have the words to express my gratitude for these women. Their creativity, humor and unending resilience inspires me every fucking day, and I really don’t know how I managed to get THIS lucky.

Ladies, I love you endlessly. Thank you for accepting me as your Cartman-coded friend, for being my biggest cheerleaders, and for creating such incredible works for everyone to enjoy. This fandom, and my time within it, has been greatly improved by every single one of you ♡

[carmenized-onions]

I’m speechless (I have so much to say)

Your mind?! Your skills?!

I totally forgot that the fucking iconic freezer fight never happened in the first chapter because Tony/Inky/Chip/Best Repairwoman To Ever Live/ Baddest Bitch To Ever Exist/ etc got there just in time, so to see it HERE??? So fucking satisfying. It’s like a train wreck you can’t look away from and you managed to completely recreate that scene, only now it’s Tony’s heart breaking instead of Claire’s 😔

I also love the fact that it was the “You’re fucking nothing!” line that prompted Tony to intervene. The same thing Lee said to Michael 💔 (Fuck that guy)

And your characterization of Tony is honesty my favorite because it’s like Carmen says, she defends herself without being mean (even though he deserves to be locked in the freezer again AND the office just for good measure) and THAT makes Carmen’s words all the more vicious because she knows he’s spiraling about something, she’s trying to be compassionate, she’s trying her damn hardest to believe that he doesn’t mean it, but then he delivers the final blow to an open wound and yeah…he must mean it

Also, Richie ready to throw down with Carmen after he made Tony cry??? Sydney immediately comforting her??? Both them AND the staff ready to WALK??? Sweeps not knowing what the fuck is going on during his smoke break??? I love them all 💕

“No. Richie’s got it. You’ve gotta keep your kitchen in order.” The way I would say the same shit just to be petty 😊

Also, the Exec asking for her number??? ew

Jump scare fr, didn’t see that coming at all 😂

Carmen’s gonna have an aneurysm when he reads that

The parking lot scene between Tony and Richie was so cathartic. They grieved Michael’s death separately for so long, blaming themselves, and now they can grieve together 🥺

I once again fully support Tony’s decision to let the stray fur ball eat Carmen’s flowers AND to leave the black plate out to fend for itself 😊

And FINALLY, “I know you said I’d be a perfect match for your little brother…” I’m SOBBING. Carmen was out here thinking that Michael and Tony were a thing when all along his older brother was trying to play matchmaker 💔

I’m gonna need about 5 business days to recover

I’m also gonna be very disappointed when season 3 drops next week and I don’t see Chip pop up within the first couple of seconds. Like THIS is season 3. It’s canon. 💜💜💜

I feel bad not responding in order but I have to start with the end. Can I be so fr. Me too. LMAO. I HAVE R O T T E D MY BRAIN. I HAVE RUINED THE BEAR FOR MYSELF LMAOOOO. I'm gonna be watching in 6 fucking days going,,,, but,,, but toneee???? but chipp??? where chip!!?!?!?!!

So I'm glad other people also think this. Delights me. I am hoping that a bunch of plot points I did still happen in season 3, because some of writing this has genuinely been either me guessing or just wanting a fun thing to happen in S3 (I.e I think wedding catering ep would genuinely be so fucking fun. like terrible. but so fun)

ANYWAYYYSSSS Back to this chapter's thoughts.

Thank you sm for having sm to say because I love to hear it-- An analysis??? ooohhfhsdfhksdjfh i could. i could maybe die. Fuckin love when people DIG IN!!!

I don't remember if I always planned for this fight to lead with the freezer fight, but I do remember seeing like a gifset of the freezer fight, and going oh I can't just let this all go unsaid. It would be AN INJUSTICE to Carm/Rich to not let that air out. You gotta level a building to rebuild. And there's just something I think on like, a reader level/ me writing it of like-- Knowing when this was supposed to happen and where that really adds so much to reading it this time, because instead of a door between them it's fucking YOU!!! FUCK !!!!!!

YEEAAGGHHH!!!! (You will see why I cannot comment more on this point of Uncle Lee later. But Just know. YEEAHFKJDFHGKJDFHGFKJDFG!!!!!!!!!)

Every time people say they love Tony as a character, an angel gets it's wings. That's how it feels for me. But 100% it made that whole scene so much more brutal because she's trying to explain and trying to understand but that's simply not how any dynamic Carmen's ever been in has worked and so it's just making him wig out more. RAH!

The other thing, that I think is like, a golden rule in writing fights-- Or at least it's always been one for me-- The hardest hitting line will always be the one that the person hearing it thinks is true about themselves. Peoples princess? Sure. Don't work here? Ouch but okay. The one thing that haunts you every day that you blame yourself for and were just waiting for one person to affirm it for you? OH!!!! OH!!!! BABYYYYYYYYY!!!!

The aftermath with the kitchen was so tough for me to think out, because I was like-- I cannot have them fucking punch Carmen. Like we can't do that. But also like. Richie would do that. WOP WOP! But I eventually agreed with myself that he'd go with chewing him out BEFORE the punch, and thankfully Chip stopped him in time.

Syd was me, when my friends cry. The yoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyo-- came from an extremely real place. and that place is my mouth. I love The Bear and Tony's relationship, which is also what makes the I don't think anyone's my friend all the more heartbreaking, because everyone was on her side there. And she just cannot see that. SON OF A BITCH BROOOOO BROOOOO STOPPPPPP I'm the one writing it who am I telling to stop?

I-- With the petty line, bro,,,, I wanted to dig into hell so bad. I wanted to snatch that motherfucker's soul-- But I left it at your kitchen because it just wouldn't be in Tony's like,,,, energy? to do so?? Like she'd already been murdered at that point, so she couldn't turn on roast mode. my poor bird.

JUMP SCARE EXEC!!! There were actually surprise surprise whether you believe me or not, a lot of different ways his dinner could've went, and I'll probably share them in another ask down the line, but the one thing I felt pretty solid about is he would be into Tony. ew.

The parking lot scene really was everything for me tbh, I'd been waiting to write this chapter overall for some time, but that one like,,,, fuck i really adore these two and it's exactly like ya said, so very cathartic for them to finally get to be absolutely not over anything togetherrrr yknow?

And that's another vote for---Fuck it, poll,

As for Mikey Matchmaker,,,,, -- You know what, i'm gonna save this for after either the series is done or after chapter 13, pending. But remind me later that i need to tell you something about Mikey and ,,,,, fire???? Yeah. Tell me I need to tell you about that, after chapter 13 or so.

[giogio1998]

Ok nerds, hear me the fuck out !!

This is my fancast for the JLI, but before we all lose it I need a quick disclaimer: this fancast is what I think the JLI could look like in a live action movie, this isn’t serious and I think if this movies were to exist it would be a comedy movie bc it’s the JLI, they’re not supposed to be taken seriously by anyone!!!!

With that in mind this is my fancast and I’ll walk you through it, let’s go:

Blue Beetle (Ted Kord):

Logan Lerman, off to a great start, i know (lol). Based on Logan’s roles throughout his career I think he would be a great Ted Kord bc he can play a nice, wholesome guy and I think he looks like the character as well. Like Ted, you would wanna put him in a jar and protect him from the world. Also he hasn’t been in many movies recently and I miss him, he deserves better.

Booster Gold (Michael J. Carter):

Lucas Till, just look at him !!! You cannot tell me he doesn’t look exactly like booster, you can’t !!! Besides Lucas has been in many action productions from movies to tv shows BUT he was also the love interest in the Hannah Montana movie THATS RANGE, he can play a the super hero and the goof we all know and love. And again, look at him !!!!

Green lantern (Guy Gardner):

Dacre Montgomery. Ok, Guy is a hard one to cast bc he is the biggest asshole in the world but we also love him bc he’s part of the JLI, we need someone that can play a jerk but can also have a redeeming plot bc again, we love him. And in my opinion dacre is the guy (get it ? Guy ?) I mean, u saw him as Billy in stranger things, he’s a great actor, he is perfect for this role.

Now comes the exciting part, the gurls.

Ice (tora olafsdotter):

Sophie Turner. Do I even have to say anything at this point? Look at her she IS Tora. You’ve seen Sophie in GOT you know she can play the baddest bitch on the planet while playing a sweet girly girl and that’s Tora right there. She can carry this role easily and I think she looks just like Tora she’s also very tall wich is great considering she’s playing a Norwegian woman.

Ok, now we need to have a talk about this next one, HEAR ME OUT.

Fire (Beatriz Bonilla da Costa):

Selena Gomez. I know what you’re gonna say: “she’s not Brazilian”. Yeah I know (I’m Brazilian myself) but let’s be realistic, it’s Hollywood, they don’t care, they don’t even know the difference between Latinos and frankly, so doesn’t the rest of the world. So if we’re gonna have a Latina play Fire it would be great to have one the most loved latinas in the world playing her. I love Selena Gomez, she’s a great actress and she can play a bad bitch and a lovely girl just like Bea. And I even got this photo to help you visualize (you’re welcome btw) and I think she looks amazing, I would add green eye contacts to the mix but I think she would nail it. And also, as a Brazilian myself she has my blessing to play fire U.U

Martian Manhunter (J’onn J’onzz):

Terry Crews, remember when I said that this movie has to be a comedy?? I always thought that Martian Manhunter would be a great comic relief bc of the breach of expectation considering he’s supposed to be a very serious character and to me Terry Crews would be PERFECT for this role, not only he can play a very intimidating character he is also one of the funniest actors out there, also with Martian’s ability to shape shift I would love to see terry play a range of things martian can turn into. I love him.

Max Lord:

Zac Efron, here’s what I’m thinking for this one: Max has to be played by someone that we really love so when it’s reveled that he’s the villain we feel even more betrayed and I think Zac is our guy. Bc everybody loves Zac efron, if you don’t you’re dead on the inside, and Zac had shown us that he can play a villain role, the man played Ted B*ndy for fuck sake’s !! He can carry this role easily.

And last but not least

Batman (Bruce Wayne):

I have no idea, this is the only one I can’t think of, bc although I love BatPat I don’t think Robert is a great fit for this particular fictional project lol, this would be a comedy movie and Robert’s version of the Batman is super serious, besides I wanted the main JLI and Batman and Martian to have a bit of an age gap to show how immature the JLI is compared to household name super heroes like the Batman you know ? So if you have a suggestion let me know bc I can’t think of anyone.

That’s it nerds, this is my fancast for the fictional JLI movie. James Gunn if you’re seeing this give me a call, I have some ideas LOL. Let me know what you think in the comments, bye ✌🏻

[lovelyelbowleech]

Small dumb ask but hear me out:

So I’ve been thinking how, in general, people of the Earth Kingdom and also the Southern Water Tribe are pretty accepting of different sexualities.

..and yet Sokka, who lived pretty isolated for all his life, still knew that telling Zuko that Hakoda and Bato were together would be a no-go-pretty-bad idea and was unsure on the Fire Nation’s stand on homosexuality. Which brings me to the conclusion that somehow he needed to have the the notion that being acceptable of queer people was not a norm and that some places condemn stupid shit like that. Considering this fact, can it then be that Kanna, baddest bitch from the Northern Water Tribe, lived in a oppressive, sexist, homophobic Society, and decided to create a little alternative community in the south where gender equality and gay rights were a thing???? Like, she literally said fuck you all I’m going to be an unsung hero here and permit Zukka to finally exist in peace? And maybe tell some tales to my grankids of how motherfucking stupid some people can be a little up north of here.

‘Cause, if that’s so..I don’t know, just hm redirect my thanks to her, that was pretty dope of her.

I don’t really know exactly what is going on here, but I’m in literal tears every time you post and just wanted to say hello and by all spirits, you really have given the world (and by that I mean me heh) a shit tone happiness, thank YOU <3

Not a dumb ask at all! I love this idea! Kanna is a bad bitch, and she definitely would embrace the more liberal views of the south, as well as making sure her son and family did not have to adhere to the rules of her own upbringing.

There will be more info on Hakoda's relationships with Kya and Bato in the fic and how that relates to their culture... although not for a while yet as there is apparently a billion chapters still to come 😂

I love these asks, and hearing people's theories and what they would like to see, so thank you for sharing! I am glad you are enjoying the fic so much! It's always really encouraging to hear ❤️

I hope your weekend is a good one!

[cacklingblobbittyrabbitty]

super unhinged rainbow magic post 10 of 12

I was a music kid so I have a lot of opinons about instruments and Vibes, they may not be correct but here they are, also small lil backstory shit will be mixed in here muahahaha

MUSIC FAIRIES

hurray no necklaces!

Poppy

That is some amazing hair!

FEDORA ALERT BABEY

Painfully 2000s - KELSI FROM HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL

She 1000% borrowed the waistcoat from Tasha (tap dance fairy)

Needs a shirt underneath tho cos Poppy is not as confident as Tasha

That being said the chosen shirt is a Disgusting colour (what’s wrong with white bruh louise the lily fairy had the same problem)

I appreciate that belt resembles a stave, but i don’t LIKE it

LOW WAISTED FLARESSSSS ARE BACK WOOHOOOO

This should be a black and white ensemble to complement the vibrancy of her hair

Ellie 

Has just graduated from acoustic to electric, she’s slightly scared of it lmao, but she eventually will buy a midnight blue guitar and her whole vibe is gonna end up being a lil bit darker

Top half shows she started playing acoustic - the shrug cardigan and sparkly stripy top have primary school vibes I’m sorry

Bottom half is brilliant and ready and raring to go - Doc Martens, tights, poofy petticoated skater skirt

That bisexual bob is a new haircut - currently she hasn’t figured out she’s bi but she’ll work it out soon - there is one girl and one boy that play bass guitar in the band and she’s gonna look at them and go oh shit

Fiona

Sandals with ballet straps! BADDEST of bad bitches

Colour scheme is gorgeous! The silver and blue work so well, I especially love the blue-black braids

Belt is so 2000s it hurts but she is WORKING IT

This is exactly how i thought she was gonna look

Really really cute outfit well done best one yet

No necklace HURRAY

Bit worried about where her wand is but we reckon she tucks it into her ballet ribbons

Oh Danni, Danni, Danni

1) the background is weirdly christmassy and i don’t like it

2) why is the outfit Like That? she’s a solar pannelled bitch - she wishes it was solar punk but it’s not, plus the 3/4 length leggings are too short 

3) why is the hair Like That? the colour, the style, UGH

This is not gay enough for a percussionist of the female persuasion! 

She’s better than that shitty little drum kit and her drumsticks are too damn short 

FIX HER 

Band shirt, flannel, skinny jeans, doc martens, solar panel belt

Messy high ponytail, no fringe, wand tucked behind ear/into ponytail

Full drum kit (bass, three cymbals, two snares and a tom tom) and a timpanny, a tambourine (dancing queeeeeeeeeen), and a vibraslap in the background with normal-sized drumsticks

Maya

70s groovy

I like her hair but not the headband

I can’t decide whether or not i like the dress, it’s giving weird kooky music teacher vibes - I love the colour scheme tho

Her shoes are really cute!

That’s not a big enough harp for her, we are so disappointed - we’ve stopped being one person so we can double our disappointment

It’s not even pretty it’s ugly as fuck

You gotta be elegant to play the harp babe i’m sorry

You are groovy - you gotta have a sexy instrument! I’d give her a trombone of a french horn for some lower brass representation but she could also absolutely pull off a sax or a clarinet

Victoria

SHE DOESN’T PLAY THE VIOLIN SHE PLAYS THE FIDDLE she’s a country bitch and she plays on the taylor swift song ‘mean’

She knows exactly who she is and she’s rocking itttttt

Alexander Rybak was in love with THIS fairytale

FINALLY SHE’S ACTIVELY USING HER WAND TO PLAY THE INSTRUMENT

We finally understood the assignment bitches

Sweepy fringe? Streaks of purple? Shoulder length messy? BEAUTIFUL

The 2000s have been condensed into this outfit - I weirdly like it tho

The embroidery on the jeans is my fave part

Colour of the boots is questionable at best but forgivable cos she’s a hoedown throwdown queen

We were on such a high with Victoria :(

Sadie

That is an oddly proportioned sax (alto? Soprano? Who fuckin knows)

Colour of hair is yuck make it darker

Headband is… a choice

I don’t like the green but the turquoise and blue colours are cute ig?

Dress is cute! Triple layer colour changing skirt!

Cardigan looks fuckin RAGGED bruh, what is it meant to be? An artistic interpretation of a treble clef??? HUHHHH also it’s ugly

I do quite like the boots it has to be said even though, once again, white boots on principle? Nein

She does have the weird girl woodwind vibes so well done ig

FIX HER

Darker hair with a wispy side fringe (like Victoria)

NO FUCKING CARDIGAN, a demin jacket instead (navy or black) with gold sparkle embroidery

Make the dress all blue, going from dark to lighter

I want her to have Helena’s (horseriding fairy) sparkly boots but in navy and gold

[vivianbernadetteaurora]

Cancer and Leo you cannot be as the duo they are the baddest bitches and they balance each other out really well because cancer fools before Leo cancers have a lot to learn from Leo. This relationship interests me because Debbie Harry is eight years older than Sable star who became a groupie at 12 years old, which worries me greatly She died at 57 of brain cancer while working in Vegas. There’s not much you can find on her life. I’m trying to find Reddit forums where I can find out more about her because if you look on YouTube there’s no documentaries all there is documentaries about the groupies And me Laurie Maddix sounds very arrogant. Where is I get this feeling of sable star being a lot more grounded don’t get me wrong. I know she was a groupie and she was like don’t go near Jimmy page to lorry but she was taken by that New York dog guy I don’t know his name as a mum don’t care Johnny funders Became very committed to the guy so much so that he did a said to her like Nancy got a good old beating trigger warning of domestic violence and background they would just say oh that’s what it was a woman gets a slut gets this Debbie Harvey has had a very interesting life as

Cancer women do she was taken in a car by Ted Bundy and managed to escape in the 70s before she became big. She was a bunny girl. She also didn’t release her first track till she was 32 years old which is really inspiring. I feel the only thing that’s a red flag for me, is a sable staffing and the relationship there. Maybe she is a mentor maybe she helps her get away from these abusive man and abusive power because of Debbie was a strong cancer woman with strong Taurus energy to And these pictures they look like a struct as strong dynamic Geo and pictures say a lot that’s why I love them so much and I’ve started scrap breaking as much as I can, going back 20 years. When I was 12 years old astrology are very niche subject so now I’m competing with these beautiful 20-year-olds as a 33-year-old woman And I’m doing all I can on here on Tumblr to show what I’m good I’ve done charts I know what I’m doing and I’m learning more. I’m actually paid £1000 to do this course and I want to do this as a living because I enjoy it so much and yes I want to do it for the money. Why should I do something for free that takes me a lot of time and effort

So to me I believe Debbie must have met Sable staff through the circles of these rockstar, men  so the picture of them at the top where they have got their heels up is at the whiskey go-go on the 20th of February 1977, say sable would’ve been 20 no 19 because she’s a Leo and Debbie would’ve been 27, I think not a massive age difference. Sorry I couldn’t give you more information but I just think it’s an interesting thing to look at them.

So I have just found out some shocking sable star has a Virgo stellium and a Virgo rules grooming and she started going to these concerts at 12 years old, but the time she was 19 she looked a lot older I wonder she died so young , she had a troubled life, which he said rest in power

[blondrichclosetwitch]

In the end, this is the truth

We just need to pick a restaurant

I wake in the morning, another appointment, I hope the psychologist listenin'

I fear you will attack me soon

All I wanna tell you is now you'll never ever have to compromise

“Well, it ain't that Barbie doll.”

(I heard the news today, oh boy)

I slip and I fall and I die

If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it

If you see my reflection in the snow-covered hills, know the beekeeper is tapping you on the shoulder, telling you it’s time

you said that it would last, but I guess we enrolled in 1984

Well, I've been haunted in my sleep; you've been starring in my dreams

Lights, camera, acción: I'll do it on my own

And do you wanna go back home?

But she don’t know that daddy got plans

A migraine headache that just won’t go away

Listen to the girl as she takes on half the world

I’ve learned all I know by the age of 9

And hey, worry turns to murder= fisherman’s tale

Secret stash, heavy bread, baddest bitches in the bed: I'm your pusherman

In ten minutes I'll be late for the door

I hope to see him someday soon

All these people think love’s for show

I’m sure you’re not protected

Two friends and two true lovers

We are programmed to receive*

And when I think of it, my fingers turn to fists

I never did anything to you, man

Why did it seem so difficult to realise a simple truth?

The answer was here all the time, you see.

Just how i missed it is a mystery to me.

I have waited and waited for this day to arrive.

The revolution was televised.

Now it's over, bye bye.

The fear is over. Men are over. Women are over.

Prayer cycle

Breakdown on the shoreline

Before work I must rehearse

I couldn’t love you more

I know they're watching

All the commotion

The kiddie-like play has people talking

They're talking

Your sex is on fire ( I find it hysterical that this is my sotd, and that the subtitles are the tower& the absolute psycho version when really we’re talking about people watching me masturbate (unknowingly) on a webcam, ahhhh those were the days)

Tell me for my sanity how do I get out of here

You're the right kind of sinner to release my inner fantasy

Yeah, find your love and treat him nice

German tangerine (tangerine story, anybody not know it? Oh just ask maggie she came up with it, never mind that she abused my mother’s belief in miracles/grief, surely this is why the teenager has her on the brain, who else do you think named 8:03 oh, she’s bad)

Well you can tie me to the bed/well you can shoot me in the leg (girls, did you know two of your storylines were in a nickel back song? Shot in the leg in September/ tied to the bed for 12 days in May.)

Drummer

Brick butterfly had a history of sleeping with the kitchen staff

Superbad!

“It’s written all over your face.”

Bring your Alibis. (Now I’m of the personal belief that when something plays 3x in a day, spirit/God/the Universe is definitely trying to to slam something down your throat for a very special reason, so don’t say they didn’t warn you.)

Some other ocean at her feet

That disappearing horizon brings cold comfort to my soul

TREASON (duh—“let me put on a show.”)

Ok well let’s start here:

Who? Lisa, a great hoodoo master who was besties with the TR

Where: online jan-April 2016

What? We got assigned as “partners” in project 40 at the TR’s suggestion.

Why: all I know is I have a tape from spring 2017 where I was told the whole thing was a set-up & Chloe was doing rituals with the TR to make me lose my mind the year before. Shall I transcribe that next?

How: all I know is my mind started to breakdown, and I had to leave the program. I even left New York. And I told Sherene that the only person I would talk to was the Tarot Reader.

I never recovered after that. I cracked nonstop for months. (I’ve actually been listening to tapes from that Lisa time, and they are def disturbing)

All the stuff they tell you about in the movies

But this isn't chocolate boxes and roses

It's dirtier than that

You count the centuries, I blink my eyes

Your town is very famous for the little girl whose crying can be heard all around the world

You are forgiven

Lost in time

Your servants

We protect our little fictions like it’s all we are

You get down, real low down

You listen to Coltrane, derail your own train

Well, who hasn't been there before?

Rhiannon

I felt you so much today

I tell you that I’ll always want you near

You made a first-class fool out of me

Careful when you're tellin' us about obsessions

Also: maggie may played twice and Maggie’s farm played once yesterday. 3 times for a 3.