#she just.

[fjordfolk]

I would say that Troj has spent Christmas learning the concept of stealing, except it's not so much stealing as it is helping herself to things she doesn't realize aren't hers?

Got up one morning, let the dogs into my mother's living room, came in a few minutes later to find Troj snuffling on the couch. The other dogs casually dispersed. Cookie tray on the table noticeably thinner than the night before. I realize belatedly that Troj is CHEWING and confiscate the soggy end of a krumkake, at which point my mother comes in, and we begin to discuss possible culprits, as the only known thief in the household is Sparta and Sparta is, for once, looking fairly innocent.

As we go through our options (Sparty but sneakier than usual, Melis but a bit short to reach the table, not Luna as she wouldn't eat it if you fed it to her, Troj has never taken anyting off my plate ever) Troj looks at me. And my mother. And the cookie tray.

And she very, very slowly she puts her paw on the table.

I tell her NO.TROJA.DOWN. and she backs off. And looks at me. Flicks her ears. And then she slowly. Deliberately. Tries one more time.

[tuxedo-rabbit]

Me: I'm just going to add 1 more mod to my game. I dont want to overdue it!

Me 5 minutes later: I mean, what damage can 10 more script mods REALLY do?

[dykeseinfeld]

i should be allowed to call in sick to work with a case of gideon nav

[flowerflamestars]

Effloresce snippet

Hands clasped perfect- it was perfection or screaming, she just needed to hold on, just needed to keep herself steady, Nesta needed time- Elain stared back. “Why what, Feyre?” “You,” Feyre wiped her pink nose, even her flush a thing of otherworldly, rosy exquisiteness, “You’re so angry. You won’t- you won’t let anyone help. Won’t- what you said to Rhys, what you did to Mor- we’re all on the same side, Elain.” Feyre made a horrible little noise, threw up her hands, “You wouldn’t even bring Nesta to her bedroom.” Something in Elain cracked. Her bedroom. Feyre had come to their home, to where they’d built all the while a place for her, and refused it. Slept in a cold unmade room, under the eye of some monstrous High Fae Lord, who’d told her she was the one in danger. That Feyre, an Archeron, was not safe on her own blood-sworn estate, the only bit of their birthright that could ever have saved them. It was all gone now. Everything was gone, and here Feyre was- perfect, immortal, unhurt, weeping- not asking where the hundreds of humans they were responsible for had landed. If the guards, under her own damned Court, had survived.

No, she wanted to know why Elain would reject the absurd hospitality they’d been shown. Three damned rooms, in three different gods-damned wings.

It might as well had been audible. Elain felt like the furrow should have been visible, hot blood streaming from her chest. Not blood- not simple heat- fire, alive, incandescent. Red ruddy blooming gold behind her eyes, a thousand withering blossoms overtaken into something beautiful too. It was not unlike holding, wearing that crown- it was a rupturing, utter magic, to just feel what she’d been feeling and let it out. “Nesta,” Elain kept her motion slow, precise, standing to back toward Lucien, away, safe, in control, “Told you exactly what would happen. I told you. We are not on the same side, Feyre. Do you understand?” “Hybern,” Feyre’s voice pitched, half a shout, “Will kill us all. We need to stand united. Rhys”- “Rhysand,” Lucien interrupted, all a forest shadow, suddenly both so dark and so bright he was impossibly to look away from.“Is not our High Lord.” “He saved my life.” “What part,” Fae and then some, a hiss of temper, Lucien right at the end of his rope, firelight seething off his skin with no clear source, air stinging with something harsher than smoke, “Of saving you, were the drugs, Feyre? Did he save you, by having you stripped bare before crowds? What does it cost you, to be the face of a war he cannot win? Has he not humiliated you enough?”

[puppyeared]

filipina miku!! my mom helped me with her outfit ^_^

[inbabylontheywept]

so once me and my wife were watching a documentary where a snake ate like a million eggs. that snake just went to fucking town on eggs. and the snake made the eggs look so good that i kept thinking about it, and thinking about it, and thinking about it, and eventually it was 11pm and i ran out of willpower and decided to eat one (1) singular raw egg just to prove to myself that the snake was surely a liar.

the snake was not a liar. texture is like, super important to me and raw eggs are very Texture so i had another one, and then another one, and then another one, and eventually i ran out of eggs.

i had like, fifteen raw eggs.

i didnt really know how to explain this momentary madness to my wife, so my Plan was to put all the eggshells into a grocey bag, and then throw that grocery bag in the dumpster, and if she never noticed that would be Excellent and if she noticed immediately i could lie and say that the eggs went bad.

except i cant lie very good, and of course with murphys law being such, i got salmonella.

so i threw up a lot and my wife asked me what poisoned me so and i tried very hard to dodge the question but i was oozing shame like oil from a room temperature cheese and eventaully i gave in and told her everything and to her enormous credit she was more flabbergasted than actually upset. she did make me promise to not eat any more raw eggs, which i have stuck to, and she gives me weird looks during nature documentaries now as if desire was the only thing keeping me from eating thousands of pounds of krill anyway i made a joke earlier about being able to eat my age in eggs and my sister in law in law made a drawing to comemorate the moment and also because it was my birthday. she's excellent. thank you 10000000% @cintailed. you should all visit her page and admire her work.

[time-woods]

Accessorize ! Accessorize ! Accessorize !

based off of how my dad got his ears pierced))

[swan2swan]

Whoever conceived and animated this moment, I hope they're doing well and thriving. This is S-rank romance stuff here.

[mountainshroom]

If she has no fans call the ambulance cause I am dead

[happyheidi]

𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗅𝗂𝗍𝗍𝗅𝖾 𝖺𝗇𝗀𝖾𝗅 𝗐𝗂𝗌𝗁𝖾𝗌 𝗎 𝖺 𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾𝗅𝗒 𝖽𝖺𝗒 ♡

𝗏𝗂𝖺: 𝖾𝗇𝗀𝗅𝖺𝗇𝖽𝗁𝗂𝗅𝗅_𝗓𝗈𝗈

[hamsternamedmarinette]

Italian microaggressions

[churroach]

Full of Desires

[frankierotwinkdeath]

Y’all want Taylor Swift to be gay so bad but you won’t even write femslash about her

[inkskinned]

she's singing in another room and my dog is asleep at my feet. my grandma asked me why i haven't found a man yet and i laughed. oh, you know. i like my house clean.

my girlfriend is also my man is also "my partner" if i'm in a professional setting. yesterday we went to a ren faire and a man mimed at me - you're together? and at my delighted nod, his baffled, you're gay? made me laugh. a woman with rainbow hair said i love the two of you together. you're both so beautiful it's absurd.

my dad introduced my partner as my "..... friend. or whatever" the other day. he knows we're dating. in the same way, i was never able to get my sister's husband to stop saying that's gay like it's 2008. he still uses the word fa***t, and my sister's defense of him has always been well, he's just kidding.

my lover and i dance to old music in a tiny kitchen. we judge new music together and take food critique very seriously. we watch love is blind before we fall asleep and agree that if they had a queer season, it would be bloody but also make for excellent tv. of fucking course queer people would know someone for only 2 weeks and agree to get married. what are you saying.

at a bar with friends, a man puts his hand on my wrist. got a boyfriend? and yes, i do have a boyfriend, she's amazing. i am texting her while i wander around a gas station named after geese. i am visiting a swing state for a wedding. in the candy aisle i overhear: she's actually like a lesbian it's disgusting. two teenage girls with packaged sandwiches in their hands, giggling. no literally, like. i'm not, like. okay with her being there while we're all, like, naked and changing.

my girlfriend and i tailgate, drink gin and cider out of cups. from the frat group beside us, a man corrects himself with one of his friends: bro, i mean, nonbinary entity, and it makes everyone around him laugh, myself included. he razzes his friend the same way i would have killed for at 19 years old - like nothing happened, he continues: you apply sunscreen like an alien. he does a little sassy (and fairly accurate) dance interpretation of the motion. his friend is laughing so hard they're crying.

i am lucky, i live in a safe neighborhood in a safe state. my masc passenger princess comes up from DC. i drive her for an hour to where all the leaves are a violent arrangement of color. we walk along the trails, letting autumn into our blood. in this part of the state, there's a lot of pickup trucks and trump signs. when we chastely kiss before getting into the car, i accidentally make eye contact with a woman holding her child's wrist. she looks disgusted. she looks fucking pissed.

two hours later my girl and i are eating dinner on a patio, soaking in the last warmth of new england sun before the chill of winter sets in. we are giggling and trying to talk through plastic vampire teeth. at another table, i see a young woman sit up straighter. i watch her watch us. she blushes and takes her partner's hand from across the table. shy, like the taste of evening has just become something deeper.

it's worth it for this moment, i think. my lover is still humming the same song she's been singing for four days straight and i don't want to kill her for it. her guitar is beside my bed. her toothbrush is in my bathroom. in a few moments i will make us lunch. we are lucky enough to have found each other. it is lucky enough to be in love.

[yeepof]

Local PHD student at wizard school HARRASSED!! FOR SHAME!!