#she had to really process it
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@kaiibacorp said: a flirtatious kiss on the back of the hand . // peiwen
kiss & tell prompts
“ Ol’ Pei, what are you up to? “
She knows Pei Ming well enough to know the fact there’s intent in his movement when he comes towards where she’s seated. But what he is up to in this case is not so clear. He’d already dragged her down from the Heavens as it was, and she was merciful enough to stay close so he didn’t have to make sure she wouldn’t slip away at the first opportunity. Or, admittedly, a book seller had managed to do that with some enticing looking pieces of literature. It was rare she got the chance to get any literature and she almost certainly wouldn’t have time to read it. But it was nice to pretend for a bit.
So Ling Wen had indulged in buying one of the books and sat herself on a bench beneath one of the flowering trees. Despite minor changes in her appearance, there was no changing her. It was like a winter snow in late spring wrapped into a human form. She might play mortal, but that did not mean she’d lower her eyes and be something passive like the sweet, doe-eyed women. If they were songbirds, then she was the eagle above, sharp eyed and proud.
But for Pei Ming, disguise or not, she allows his approach when others dare only observe from afar. The last thing she expects though is for him to take her hand and press a kiss to the back of her hand with that charming air of his. She much prefers his real face, but this one has its own charm. Still. The mere fact he’d done this!
.....She has to hand it to him though. He still shows her even after centuries that he can surprise her. No one had ever acted in such a way. Probably for the best for the other’s sake, lest her sharp tongue slaughter them like lambs.
Ling Wen’s blinks, and her slightly wide-eyed expression shifts back to something more sly even as she permits his act, standing up to draw herself closer to his height. Her lips curve up and she leans closer to his ear while allowing her hand to rest in his. “ I do hope you don’t think the disguises change things, hm? I’m a snake, not a mouse, pretty boy. “ Though a book is held in her free hand, she lifts it so one finger rests under his chin, blue eyes bright with a challenge. “ Think you can handle that? “
She gives him a wolfish smile, daring him on as she pulls away. If he wanted to play, then she’d play.
#kaiibacorp#she said you want to play? lets play 💅#(she is admittedly having a bit of fun at the idea of it)#but also the idea that he can still catch her by surprise !!#after all she's still her#hand kisses are not something she's normally given#or ever given like this#she had to really process it#congrats pm you got to see her visibly surprised!#its cute though#the idea of playing like this#᛭ — [IC] she who possesses tundra as a heart [LING WEN]#᛭ — [RELATION] when the flames grow nearer catch me in your arms [LW & PM]
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agatha definitely didn’t need to kiss rio to use her powers on her or take billy’s place. she chose for it to be the last thing she ever did. she wanted to let rio back in so bad but she is so stubborn that the only way she could actually do it was with the promise of death swiftly after.
#jac confirmed they had kissed before and the death was agatha using her power#so why didn’t she just absorb a blast??? we know why#i really hope they talk in an interview about agatha’s thought process in ep4 and why she was going in for the kiss then#bc with everything else afterwards it is complicated i want some more insight into the intention there#agatha all along#agatha all along spoilers#agatha harkness#rio vidal#agatha x rio#agathario
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Oh, help me God, this hellboy got me coming back for more
reblogs super appreciated !!! close-ups under the cut !
#south park#south park fanart#stan marsh#shroomer's art !#shroomer's archives: south park#artists on tumblr#my ramblings + thought process starts here (warning. its a lot) vvvvvvvvvvvvvv#"heyyyyy shadowww. its mee. da devil.#the amount of eyestrain i went through while rendering this#gradient maps!!! are so fun!!! (they are not i hate them so much)#lots to improve on still. but that's for next time!#the process of making this was so arduous.... but i learned a lot i feel#(and also if i had spent any more time working on this i would have actually lost it)#BUT YIPPEEEEE HAPPY BIRTHDAY STAN MARSH THE LOSER BOY I CANT BELIEVE I FINISHED THIS ON TIME#2 days in advance too by the time the queue uploads it#anyways.... stupid loser boy stan marsh..... i found out his birthday was coming up soon#and i had this idea sitting in my head for like.... 2 weeks i think#popped up when i was listening to lexie liu's album the happy star and the song diablo came up#and i thought wait.... doesnt stan get possessed by satan at some point#and so here we are!!#I ACTUALLY RECENTLY WATCHED THE EPISODE TOO AND THE THEME OF THE SONG FIT THE THEME OF THE EPISODE CRAZY WELL AS WELL#sometimes my genius is almost frightening#anyways this emotionally sensitive animal lover boy has really grown on me over the course of the series <3#i still havent.... finished cartman's sheet.....#the self designated deadline i gave myself of 2 weeks is coming up soon and erm. guh.#dies#this took so much effort and brainpower that needed to be allocated to my assignments.......#but its ok!!! im gonna sell this as a print!!! so its kind of!! productive!!#guh i hope this one performs well sob theres this nagging feeling i have that its not gonna do well at all#try painting some funky lighting + greyscale painting she said. it'll be fun she said.
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Well? Have I convinced you yet?
#genshin#genshin impact#genshinedit#genshinet#xianyun#cloud retainer#m:gifs#m:*#m:gifs:cloud retainer#i just realized she said have i instead of has one.... hmmm....#not sure if i'll gif anything else from this demo tbh... there are some small shots i really like#but not enough to make a coherent set bc otherwise it's mostly just her twirling every 0.2 seconds LMAOO#and it's too chaotic to do my usual 3x2 ones#also for this at first i was gonna also include the shot of her smiling up bc IT STOLE MY HEART <3333#but this coloring actually looks awful there adfjklasdfj#i also had to change up my vapoursynth settings for once bc the artifacts from sharpening were real bad here#mostly bc they went full bloom filter on her face and her glasses contrast against it as a really hard edge for vs#tldr; this demo is process-wise hard for me to gif ajdlkajfs
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having fucked up thoughts middle of the night
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just sketching this down before i forget hehe
(my tablet broke. So I can't draw. Oop)
#do you think mizi has moments where her nightmares get really fucked up#but also do u think she has moments where she goes damn i didn't even get to kiss my gf before she died#yeah so i thought about that#something something loss of innocence something like that#something something horror is an afterthought or something like that#i wonder if she's had time to process regret yet#anyway#anyway i'll work on this later when i have the time maybe#alien stage#mizisua#kk rambles#my art
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derg
#wings of fire#mcsm#mcsm au#wof au#premaposting#i made these actually a long bit ago#except for jesse 2 thats recent#but the rest of them were from a good bit ago#i didnt want to post it idk why but i dont want it to rot in my folders either so im posting it#ok my thought process from these#i did a funny and made all of the jesses just mudwing sibs#the main one or first listed is acc the runt. thats why they look weird. theyre not fleshed out yet :(#second one is one of the only older siblings that are still around. the rest had separated for jobs and such#but she lingers around a bit. job-looking but occasionally is there to cheer her lil sib on and stuff#i didnt want the rest of them to be the same tribe or the same main tribe so i made axel a hivewing#skywing could work however i really really wanted petra to be a skywing#i chose hivewing also bc i wanted the ofts to match with them and i made magnus hivewing i think#ik ellegaard is a sandwing#thats why olivia is sand/night#i couldnt decide on whether to make either of them sand or night#so i made olivia both#petra skywing/seawing#i could not not give her seawing literal pirate motif#also smth smth earring is actually important and not really for show#then lukas silk/sand. debating on whether he should have fire be a flamesilk or have neither#a lot of these choices im still debating idk nightwing lukas would be cool#but i didnt want to choice obvi picks for everyone. tried to get a little creative#these tags are so long jsdnsjdnsjdsdkjsdkjsndsnd helppppp#update just realized i abbreviated the order as ofts instead of oots#smhhhhh im a fake fan
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Alicent .00005 seconds after learning about Rhaenyra and Mysaria
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#girl really had to go touch grass#she needed a lil float#too much to process#alicent hightower#hotd#house of the dragon#hotd spoilers#rhaenyra targaryen#rhaenicent#rhaenyra x alicent#alicent x rhaenyra#mysaria#mysaria x rhaenyra#rhaenyra x mysaria
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I finally got some moment to finish DTIYS @soularsss stylish OC Reave \o/
https://tumblr.com/tagged/soularsdtiys
#star wars#soularsDTIYS#star wars oc#star wars fanart#It's not really perfect I made it between other wips#I went with my first idea like#posing is me trying to do some kind of splash art#process was all over the place#I know the contrast and values are not super duper great#Well it's the intention who counts#she's so fire#I had to draw her
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Okayyyyy yeah also let's talk about Tammy. I didn't know how I felt about her for awhile because she did very much feel like the Disposable Black Girlfriend, but I'm seeing people saying she's an "abuser" or God forbid "just as bad as Kevin" and that's just. Not at all true.
Yes, Tammy is controlling. She doesn't seem to really like Patty for who she is, and kind of seems to want to change her into someone else instead. HOWEVER, I think we need to look at the whole character to understand WHY she's like that. I don't think she's controlling Patty for personal gain or for the sake of manipulating her. I think she's lonely and desperate for companionship, which leads to her ignoring/pushing past the obvious incompatibility in her relationship with Patty.
Here's what we know about Tammy:
1. She seems to be the only black person in the Worcester social circle. She also mentions frequently how she's surrounded entirely by white men at work.
2. She is also the only openly lgbt person in the area, other than Patty, who is still not exactly out and proud.
3. She describes her entire job as "making excuses for" and "cleaning up after" the men at her job, particularly her partner (whose name I am unfortunately forgetting, does anyone remember?), who even had her plant evidence for him on at least one occasion.
4. Despite being very competent and good at her job, the white men around her keep failing upwards (she mentions a few times that people beneath her keep getting promoted) while she remains stagnant in her career. There doesn't seem to be any explanation for this other than the fact that she is a black lesbian in an extremely white, conservative community.
Basically, Tammy seems like someone who has been taught (like many black women) that she will have to work much harder than everyone else to get ahead in any capacity. She is also likely very, very lonely. She doesn't seem to have any friends outside of work, which isn't surprising given the above. It seems like she doesn't exactly have a ton of prospects, dating-wise, other than Patty. In my opinion, it's really no wonder that she clung to Patty so desperately and immediately and tried to forcibly mold her into someone who could be compatible. She's tough, smart, organized, direct, manipulative, no-nonsense and controlling because, well, she had to be. And she ends up trying to "rein in" Patty because, in her mind, what's the other option? She ends up alone, surrounded by men who force her to cover for their antics and don't care if she lives or dies.
I'm not saying her behavior is healthy. But it comes from an entirely different place than Kevin's abuse, or Chuck's, or even Neil's. And it's also not uncommon. In real life, I know many queer women (specifically small-town lesbians) who end up in relationship dynamics just like that over and over again because they start dating someone who doesn't quite fit, and they compensate for it by trying to force a connection instead of accepting loneliness and isolation. I have a lot of sympathy for Tammy. And I wish the show had taken more care to establish the abuse she faced from her coworkers off-camera.
#tammy ridgeway#kevin can fuck himself#kevin can f himself#patty oconnor#basically i think tammys story is about the perils of girlbossdom for black queer women#and theres a lot to be said about the fact that she chose to be a cop. we dont know anything about her home life or childhood or anything#other than that she grew up in worchester (?) which i think she mentions one time#but like the black lesbian cop trope is so overplayed due to sitcoms fundamentally not understanding why 'diversity' is important#and like im sure her character was meant to kind of lampshade that phemonenon#but i think its so interesting to look at characters like that and ask WHY they ended up in that position#in tammys case i think it was definitely trying to 'rise above her stature' and basically force people to actually respect her#not that it worked of course. it never does#and she had to become a tool of the oppressor in the process#ill talk about sam later because hes also a really interesting case study on race in sitcoms and the way poc are framed#but these are my thoughts for now. this show has gotten my analysis brain buzzing again and i feel alive for the first time in months
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Okay I'm back on grinding out money pins in NEO (as you do) and I'm sorry was anyone going to tell me that the overpowered Gatto Nero pins are each named after a season and the flavor text says they're engraved with the words "seasons greetings"
Implying they were released as seasonal promotions, And, someone in the UG, who had access to pins, would be able to collect them, and be able to tell what time of year it was, perhaps important because their grasp of the passage of time is shaky, wherever they are. And perhaps they could read the pin, and be protected, not just by the power of the psychs, but by knowing that, somewhere, somewhere in the real world, the person who made the pin is trying to say hello?
Or was I supposed to notice on my own and come up with this elaborate headcanon on my own?
#I've heard the hc that the gatto nero pins are shiki trying to reach out. but I had never really THOUGHT about it#oh my god. she tried. she tried with everything she had#thinking about her making this set year after year. her having twelve of these collected in a box somewhere. Four for every year he missed#about how of COURSE its by season. gatto nero is a FASHION BRAND. its one for every season of hers he missed the shows and the lines#and the design process and her artblocks and her breakthroughs and her runway weeks and the tears and the smiles and their dream#coming together bit by bit. and he doesnt get to be there.#but she can do something. she can try to keep him aware. she can tell him that somewhere the spring flowers are blooming.#she can reach out and say 'hey. its summer. and I'm thinking about you.'#'its autumn. the leaves are starting to turn and fall. I'm still thinking about you.'#'hey. it's been a couple of months. the snows just started to fall. I dont know if it's falling where you are. But I'm thinking about you.'#SCREAMING#ON MY HANDS AND KNEES DRY HEAVING#the world ends with you#twewy#neo the world ends with you#neo: the world ends with you#neo: twewy#neo twewy#ntwewy#twewy spoilers#ntwewy spoilers#shiki misaki#neku sakuraba
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Question about Couya! Since she is a bastard what are the reasons about her being brought into the main family by her father. Was it genuine care for his child or a way to save face politically/socially? Is her birth mother alive? Do you think she would have had a better life growing up anywhere else?
This is in large part due to how cultural perceptions and legal punishment of adultery varies between male and female citizens, looped into the very strictly patrilineal kinship system.
By legal definition, the word for 'adultery' applies only to situations where a man has an affair with a married woman, or a married woman has an affair with any man. Other forms of affairs (eg a married man having an affair with an unmarried woman) are wrapped into a broader set of sexual misdemeanors and aren't often charged or punished in practice, and the punishments are comparatively minor (if an unwed woman's father pursues charges, the man in the affair is likely to just pay a fine). On a social level, extramaritial affairs in general are certainly not Approved of and seen as lowly and dishonorable, but the average response is significantly less harsh/more willing to entertain Nuance with men than with women.
In this society there's differentiated shades of bastardry depending on the contexts of the child's birth, as well as a distinction for 'nameless bastards' (has not been claimed by their biological father or maternal grandfather, or claimed in adoption).
a) A child born to an unmarried woman via an unmarried man: non-issue for father, potentially serious social harm for the woman (especially if she has never been married and expected virginal, much less severe as a widow or divorcee). The child will not be notably disadvantaged in of themselves (their status will depend more on whether they are claimed and thus provided the social security of a family patriarch), the father will experience no hard disadvantages in claiming them.
b) A child born to an unmarried woman via a married man: mild sexual misdemeanor for the father carrying levels of social shame, even more serious social harm for the woman (often framed as not just loose but a manipulative Seductress of a married man). The child might experience minor to moderate social disadvantages, the consequences of the father claiming them are purely social and will not typically be severe. (Couya is this)
c) A child born to a married woman via an unmarried or married man: both man and woman have committed a crime and can be severely punished. The biological father can technically claim the child but will be disincentivized from doing so. This is the form of bastardry most comparable to the conventional definition, in that it is heavily stigmatized and has effects on concerns of kinship and inheritance.
In addendum to this, if the adulterous wife's legal husband claims the child, this may be punishable if determined to be active concealment of adultery (which is also a crime), and has EXTREME social consequences either way. (Either you're a cuckold too stupid to notice that your wife has been skipping out on you, or you're a MEGAcuckold adultery-accessory willingly rearing another man's child after being horribly shamed by him).
(This is separate from adoption- a man who marries a woman with an unclaimed child after the fact (whether it was a product of adultery or just a general out of wedlock birth) and claims the child is an adoptive father, he is not concealing adultery or being cuckolded.)
A child born in an affair can be considered an heir to their biological fathers (descent and kinship is fully patrilineal and on a Basic level it doesn't matter who the mother is), and can very smoothly and legally be claimed when the affair was not considered criminal adultery. The concern on that front is social perception rather than material legal consequences or kinship issues.
Couya's birth mother was an unwed servant working as a housekeeper for her father Saizen, so the Crime of adultery did not take place. It would be considered a minor sexual misdemeanor, and the woman's father was not about to pursue charges against a nobleman who could Ruin him (and had also formally expressed that he would claim the child, which meant he would not be saddled with a nameless bastard granddaughter). So the concerns here were entirely social.
The affair might have started beforehand but the pregnancy that produced Couya occurred after his wife's third viable pregnancy ended in the premature birth of a underdeveloped boy deemed necessary to euthanize (and tbr would Not have survived either way). This was after Livya Haidamane had a couple early term miscarriages, two viable but very difficult pregnancies wherein one child was very weak and sickly for the first several years of life, and struggled to conceive every time. A lot of people are going to be at least a little sympathetic to a married man having an affair and claiming a bastard in this context. It's definitely ideal and practical to have more than two children, and his wife (while not outright infertile) clearly could not reliably bear healthy children. (The average response is going to be "Well he shouldn't have done it but like, I get it")
Couya being claimed by her father was a mix of genuine care and saving face. Initially it was MUCH more the latter than the former. Saizen made attempts to hide the servant's pregnancy and to keep his own wife out of sight during the late term (to prevent the baby appearing after his wife had been seen Extremely not pregnant). But there's some levels of care involved, he could very easily have fired the pregnant servant and had nothing to do with his bastard and she would have no recompense whatsoever. The choice to keep and claim the baby and ensure its entrance into the world bore as little social scrutiny as possible is an act of care for his own progeny.
This was Not an act of care for Couya's birth mother (beyond the fact that concealing her pregnancy would benefit her in hiding that she is not only Not a virgin prior to marriage but had a child). She probably would have been about 17-19 at the time and was fired a few months after giving birth, and most likely never saw Couya again after this point (if she did, it would most likely be in the context of seeing her as an adult Odonii in public and noting her to look Scarily familiar). She has an Okayish chance at still being alive, she'd be around 50 (and a person who survives the high infant mortality and birth casualty rates stands a good chance of hitting their 60s), though she could very well be a casualty of the drought+famine.
Whether or not Couya's life would have been better is kind of a mixed bag. She had an awful fucking childhood in large part because her adoptive mother Livya Haidamane hated her. (Livya was ultimately a pretty horrible person but not just like. An Evil Bitch. She had A Lot going on and Couya was a living breathing insult to her and reminder of like, every one of her dashed hopes and dreams). Couya is also autistic and presented very intense symptoms as a child in a society that is Not equipped for a mass-understanding and support of cognitive differences. But she still did have an immensely privileged life with profound physical/economic levels of security inaccessible to the vast majority of people in this region, including her birth mother. Saizen also actually Liked her and cared about her, he just wasn't a routine physical presence in any of his children's lives.
Had she been left with her biological mother, she would be in a very disadvantaged situation as a nameless bastard to an unwed mother. Her biological grandfather may or may not have been willing to claim her, and her mother would have great difficulties in finding a husband (which is ultimately necessary for the security of women in this society). I think her mother was a relatively kind person but not like, a perfect angel. She would probably have complicated feelings about her bastard daughter, especially one whose very existence materially disadvantages her and was very, very difficult as a child. So this probably would not have been a good situation for Couya either.
If you broaden the question to ANY other family completely divorced from the circumstances of her birth, yeah it definitely could have been better. But in her case it's like either "Life of grotesque socioeconomic privilege but in an abusive household" or "Life of profound socioeconomic disadvantages in a household that Probably wouldn't have been this abusive but certainly wouldn't be healthy". There wasn't really a good option for her.
#I think I've overemphasized the Social consequences of adultery/bastard children and underemphasized that committing#or abetting adultery is Illegal and punished pretty severely#But in this case nothing about Couya's birth was considered 'adultery' by societal definition and in being formally claimed by her#father (with no reason to question that he Is her father) the rest of her family is obligated to treat her as full kin wrt familial#obligations and inheritance#Livya Haidamane was also expected to fully behave as her mother and like. This happened after suffering through very difficult and#traumatic pregnancies. Delivering a premature son and watching him be euthanized. Then her husband IMMEDIATELY#knocks up a servant and most people around her are kind of like 'yeah not a great thing to do but I get it' because she was Only able#to push out two relatively healthy kids. And then she has to treat the Living Embodiment of all this as her daughter who happens#to also be an extremely difficult child.#This kind of changed the whole trajectory of her life and was not something she had Any means of processing or coming to terms with#and instead Coped with by severely emotionally abusing said child and pitting her against her disappointing son while idolizing her#eldest daughter thus contributing to the production of three really fucked up adults.#Also note that 'claiming a child' overlaps with but is not the same thing as 'raising a child in your household'#A claimed child takes the father's family name and is considered legal kin. This has very practical applications and means that#you and the rest of your family have lifelong legal and honor-based familial obligations to this child.#A father (or grandfather) may deign to raise a bastard without claiming them which can provide physical security but does not#have Kinship and its structure of familial obligations backing it. So these two situations can be materially different and affect#the trajectory of a child's life.
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What are your headcanons about Marcille's mom if you have any? It's interesting that what drew Donato to her was cause she lived the history he studied, or that was said somewhere at least. She must've had an interesting life.
so this was going to be just a normal answer but then I realized I have a Lot of Things To Say. so here goes, a compilation of what we know for a fact from the canon, what I've extrapolated from the visual cues and details, and my theories based on all of that.
Things we know for a fact about Marcille's mother because they were explicitly stated in the manga and supplemental materials:
She was a court mage for a Tall-man kingdom at the southern part of the Northern Continent
Donato, a court historian, fell in love with her because she had lived through the history he was studying, and he courted her for 17 years (age 15 to 32) before getting married
She was a cheerful person who rarely showed extreme emotion and took things as they came
She always cooked a huge meal for Marcille on her birthdays
She remarried a gnome after Donato's death and a short distance away from Marcille's childhood home
Pipi, Marcille's pet bird, was actually older than Marcille and originally belonged to her mother (bird died at 62)
She was extremely heartbroken when Donato died and ultimately ended up instilling a deep fear of mortality in Marcille with her words
the only time she showed extreme emotion in front of her family was when Donato could no longer eat his favourite dish near the end of his life.
She scolded Marcille for being cruel to ants (implying she can have a stern side when needed)
Things that are explicitly shown but mostly through visual cues
She has a very distinctive style of dress always involving a ribbon choker (mirroring Marcille's habit of always wearing a matching choker with any of her outfits that don't cover her neck)
She was almost stereotypically good at housekeeping and traditionally "wifely" things (very frequently depicted wearing an apron or doing some domestic chore when not at work, seems to have been an avid cook).
She knits? (also, note the affectionate smile as she's looking at Donato and Marcille reading a book together in the full panel)
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She was as excited for Marcille's milestones as Donato was.
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She didn't tell Marcille much about elven food
(there are a couple things that this panel in particular implies:
She lived a good deal of her life (if not being born and raised) in a mainly elven country in the West, implied by her knowing enough of an elven region's cuisine to prefer Tall-man food over it
seems to have a pretty carefree and casual demeanour overall, if this is how she replied to Marcille asking her about it (sounds like she never gave her culinary preferences that much thought to begin with)
slightly related to number 2, it seems like she and Marcille had a fairly casual parent-child dynamic (especially in comparison to the Toudens' memory of their father)
(local elf tastes Italian food once and never goes back))
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However, she seems a lot more... serious in most of the other times we see her? Almost like the very stereotypical archetype of a graceful elf.
Subsequent conclusions about her personality:
Usually pretty carefree and cheerful at home, has been a loving and attentive parent throughout Marcille's childhood (while not being so doting that she didn't discipline Marcille).
Slightly more conjectural theories on her personality:
Had a much more graceful and professional personality at work, which would explain the more serious portraits we see of her.
Given that both she and Donato had positions at the royal court, it seems a little odd that she'd go out of her way to do all the housework herself, so maybe she just enjoyed doing it?
Now taping all the evidence together and toeing the line between analysis and fanfiction:
It's clear that she loved Donato very much and was utterly devastated by losing him. But there's one thing that really stuck out to me in what little we see of her:
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Doesn't she seem... angry? The way she's gritting her teeth, clutching the tablecloth, and how this is the first and only time we see her eyes opened that wide. In the following panel, you see her being quiet and dejected after her initial outburst. She's still crying very intensely, but her brows are furrowed, and she's not really responding to Donato's affection in her body language.
We're not told the details of how she felt about losing Donato other than that it upset her. But this, to me, implies that she was angry and resented that he was aging, that the end of his life was approaching. An "it's not fair" type of preemptive grief. And if this was the first and last time she cried like this in front of her family, she was either very good at coping in private... or very bad at letting herself feel unpleasant emotions until they become unavoidable and end up overwhelming her.
It's not too remarkable a detail on the surface. It's even reminiscent of what the audience has seen of Marcille. But... when it comes to the big picture, you'd think an elf who voluntarily chose to marry a tall-man and have a half-elf child would have been better prepared for this.
It kind of recontextualizes her cheerfulness to me.
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"I'm sure everything's gonna be okay!" (or some variation thereof, depending on what translation you have).
And this is stated to contrast her extreme grief when finally confronting Donato's failing body and eventual death. But I'm wondering if... maybe this optimism was why she was so upset. What if she went into all of it thinking "everything's gonna be okay"? What if she was a little young by elven standards, and just followed her heart thinking that her own resilience would get her through anything?
Of course, only to get completely overwhelmed when she actually loses Donato. She turns into a completely different person. And that's heartbreaking on its own-- but what the audience sees is the effect it had on Marcille. Can you imagine being her, watching your invincible and upbeat mother suddenly lose all the light in her eyes in one go?
I've already made a huge post about how I think Marcille models her "work persona" off her mother, but another thing that stuck with me as I was looking for more details in the manga was this:
copy pasting from the other post i made about it lmao it's like... the second she resigns herself to lifelong pain and terror, there's another portrait of her mother facing her like this. with their heads bowed, in mirrored body language of resignation and despair and sorrow. Except it's posed like Marcille is still looking at her mother but her mother is looking away.
It took me a second to realize, but I think that it's a visual metaphor for the fact that Marcille's mother was the only long-lived role model she had-- and she failed to model healthy grief for her daughter. I don't say this as an accusation or to disparage her as a character, but just as a matter of fact. In her, Marcille was seeing herself older and losing a short-lived spouse or loved one of her own, and all she saw was hopelessness.
But her mother didn't mean to instill hopelessness and terror in her. She wasn't really thinking of how it would truly affect Marcille at all (at least, that's how I'm interpreting her looking down and away from Marcille in the metaphor), she was just sad. And she, in her own way, was trying to protect her daughter and help her prepare for future losses.
What she meant was "loss is inevitable, and you have to learn how to be in pain but live on anyway." What Marcille heard was "loss is inevitable, and you will be scared and hurt for the rest of your life."
Again. Marcille's mother doesn't feature explicitly in the story the way her father does -- but in so many ways, her shadow, her silhouette, her reflection is always hanging over Marcille.
All that to say... headcanon-wise (everything from here on is 100% without evidence lmao), I'd like to think that she matured and realized that she failed Marcille. I imagine her being regretful about it, wanting a chance to fix it but never finding a way to insert herself back into Marcille's life when Marcille is so so so busy becoming the most accomplished mage possible. I imagine her being herself again, now, so many years after her loss and after remarrying -- but with her cheerfulness tempered with a lot more wisdom and the pain of having gone through loss like that. I think the second Marcille actually tells her what happened in the dungeon, she'd want to go running to her daughter again -- if Marcille tells her the full truth instead of just being embarrassed she let things get that far. (oh, the tragedy of her wanting to be more like her mother and an accomplished adult who doesn't need to be babied... being embarrassed to actually tell her mother how much she fucked up...)
There's also the tension of her having remarried -- I know that there's at least a little bit of resentment that Marcille harbours about that, because she's childish like that at heart even if she makes an effort not to externalize it. I think that her mother would be aware of that, potentially adding to her sense of guilt and apprehension at trying to reappear/intrude on Marcille's life. I honestly don't think Marcille has met her stepfather -- or even considers him a stepfather rather than "mama's new husband" and kind of a total stranger. I think she and her mother actively don't talk about it in their correspondence, like an elephant in the room.
but, ultimately, I think her mother is on her side no matter what. Ancient magic? Dark necromancy? Sure, she'll feel guilty and like she was partially responsible for setting Marcille down such a painful path, but she wouldn't care. that's her daughter!! she would've moved back west and been petitioning for her at the court, buying a house right next to the Canaries barracks and visiting her every day that she wasn't on a mission. And if her husband had opinions on Marcille becoming a "dark arts user," he either gets over it or it's divorce with him. Yes, she might have had her optimism completely humbled by losing Donato like that -- but she's still headstrong and self-assured and she doesn't care what people think of her. It's her way or the highway and she's always going to be in Marcille's corner.
(She also needs a name lol. I went with Juno, just to be cute about "Marcille"s closest real life equivalent being Marcella, which is the female version of Marcellus, which in turn is a diminutive of Marcus, which was derived from Mars. Absolutely in love with Marcille potentially being named after Ares/Mars the fucking god of war btw)
#asks#she could easily be interpreted as distant or neglectful after Donato's death too#with how little involvement she has in Marcille's life/the fact that Marcille doesn't even mention her when talking about her life prospect#and that's fair! I will argue to hell and back that she was a loving parent when Donato was alive#but there's nothing that suggests she remained a loving parent afterwards#I just think that like... parental relationships are so complicated in dungeon meshi#you cannot deny that the toudens' mother loved them dearly but that she failed them both miserably as a parent#and i think it'd be more compelling if Marcille's mother was a little like that too#not a totally and easily dismissable deadbeat#but someone who truly loves her daughter but was only human herself and couldn't be what Marcille needed at a crucial moment#and regrets it deeply#and that the distance between them is mutually self-imposed by complicated feelings of guilt and fear#and a little resentment from Marcille's side that she hasn't really properly processed#I don't know if I'll ever get around to writing it but i had this idea where Marcille does finally spill the beans to her mom and she just#immediately arrives in Melini#and its awkward for a bit but they do finally have a heart to heart and air it all out#and marcille starts freaking out that her marriage is rocky rn bc her new husband wants her to distance herself from marcille#on account of the crimes and all#marcille's like no you can't blow up your marriage for me and her mother just shuts that shit down#'you didn't choose to be born. i was the one who made that choice for you'#'i brought you into this world and i'll be damned if i don't take responsibility for that the entire way'#'you are entitled to *nothing less* than my unconditional love.'#and obviously that's not a sentiment that's exactly healthy as a universal statement about parenthood#but i think its what her mother would believe and what marcille needs to hear#and dungeon meshi does such a fantastic job at just... letting imperfect things just *be* without having to justify it immediately#it expects the audience to do their own critical thinking#and know that its not trying to make sweeping universal statements in every instance#marcilleposting#marcille donato#junoposting
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Osprey and Carnelian
So, I have this little headcanon that Carnelian and Osprey were related, maybe he was her grandfather or great-uncle (which is how Carnelian knew Peril), so I figured I'd draw something inspired by that headcanon
I gave them both curled horns and orange feathers just to add some resemblance between them. They also both have just the slightest pink tint to their scales, which is actually also the case in the graphic novels!
+ extra Carnelian drawing, I was gonna give her the necklace she has in the graphic novel (which I assume has a mountain lion claw on it which is really cool) but I forgor
(This was originally going to be Carnelian's mother, who I named Wildfire, but as the drawing went on it started looking more and more like Carnelian so I just made it Carnelian, I have another drawing of Wildfire but it's not done yet)
#bonus hc: Carnelian had a crush on Peril but didn't do or say anything about it because she didnt know how to process those emotions#I am really bad about posting art on here huh#wings of fire#wof#wof carnelian#wof osprey#digital art#art#headcanon#hc#my art
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bad omens
#rin nohara#team minato#naruto#my art#URGH hi first art post...#i've had such big feelings about rin lately#specifically about the really haunted... distant way she expressed grief and resolution post kanabi bridge and in the moments before she di#d#<- lol the disrespect#it just keeps hitting me how seriously conditioned this generation was into not expressing/identifying with fear#and how reaching adulthood must have felt like such an impossible ordeal#crazy to think how few of the genin from this group ever made it past chunnin...#idk#i feel like she must have heard the death bells tolling for months after obito's death#(which would explain why she seems to grow up so suddenly... and kakashi sort of stagnates like he hasn't even begun to process it)#ARGHHHH i don't know there's too much to write#in like tags#i'm just kind of nuts about her
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Late night Van doodles
#a hat in time#demondoodles#my art#ahit#queen vanessa#ahit vanessa#Riddle Rosehearts#Twst#twisted wonderland#implied child abuse#ah yes my favorite queen character with mommy issues#Fr tho Lore HC time:#I don't think Vanessa enjoyed the whole cutting the hair thing#she knew it was wrong but kept justifying it to herself that it had to be right because the fact they didn't match was wrong#I mean Vanessa being the love crazed obsessed gf she wouldn’t have apologized in that note rather tried to gaslit him further#seeing as he was willing to overlook a lot of things this wouldn’t be a big deal for him but even so she apologizes for it#me thinks she most likely experienced something like that and processed it as something was normal#horrible and wrong but normal#not to say I excuse her abusive behavior I just know it’s not easy to get abusers to apologize#sure she might have done it to be manipulative but I like to think she meant some of it#also another thing: I like to believe she idolized her princess days#back then she never had to work hard she was just supposed to be a perfect sweet princess#now that's she’s queen she can't be a little girl hiding from responsibility she has to run a kingdom and worst by herself since no family#sure she had the prince but he was at school all ugly responsibilities went to her and she just doesn’t want it#she wants to be a sweet naive princess that the prince fell in love with and not a responsible ugly queen like her mom#Sorry for the rambling I just really love van and I'm sure you can tell lol
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Hello!!
I’ve had an unpublished modern au byler fic in the works for an embarrassing amount of time and I’ve noticed that you two talk about characterization a lot, which has been my main struggle. I’ve figured out choices to make for characters and how they relate to choices and characteristics of the canon characters in the show, but I’m not sure if the reasoning behind those choices and traits will translate to readers.
I love the fic and I feel like y’all did a great job with making those reasonings clear in your writing without directly saying it, so I’d love to know if you have any specific tricks for that!
Also sorry if this kind of formal, I’m stuck in email mode with finals coming up :|
hello! soooo sorry this is such a late response — i was thinking it over when it came in and then i ended up talking about something similar on another ask and totally blanked 😔 thank you so much for asking for our input, i’ll try to be as concise as i can! (<- edit from future me who has finished typing up her answer to this ask: famous last words. you were not concise. at all. oh my god i’m sorry) i know you said you already made your initial characterization choices and everything so please bear with me while i word vomit and rehash what was probably part of your thought process anyways just to be able to follow my own train of thought lol
some general thoughts here that thea and i have been mulling over for the last few months regarding how we’ve written our fic and choices we have made for it: we’re both well aware that acswy is not everyone’s cup of tea for many reasons, but i’m specifically bringing this up in response to your ask because every once in a while, we do see someone refer to our mike and will as being written out of character, whether or not that’s a deterrent for them in reading. and i want to make it clear that this doesn’t bother us and nothing im about to say is meant to sound defensive or like we’re making a case to people who feel this way — we have our reasons for making the decisions that we did and also already heavily retconned our og concept for them on account of it having been pretty ooc at the time, even to us, so we’re confident with where we are now — but it has made us think about what people actually consider to be “out of character.” this brings me to my first point re: characterization which is, to us, the importance of differentiating between something that the character in the source material doesn’t/probably wouldn’t do versus something that is more of a direct contradiction to the character themselves. for example, we’ve seen people say (often while reading for the first time) that will is ooc specifically in the first couple chapters of acswy, a big reason being because he’s “mean to mike.” it is, of course, vastly different from how he acts in the show and is probably a slightly jarring dynamic to be dropped into right off the bat, especially since the entire premise of the fic is that the reader has almost zero context for why he’s behaving this way, and even more so at the beginning of the fic before his and mike’s relationship develops further. to me and thea as writers, the importance lies more so in the context for it all: how mike and will would turn out after growing up without each other as best friends, with a lot of the cultural pressures of the 1980s removed but having some new ones of the 2010s/20s introduced; not going to high school together, being in the same friend group for years and getting closer over time with many interests in common, but also facing a lot of conflict and having that friend group be geographically separated while a lot of it goes down.
and with this context, what we would consider to be ooc would be if we just like. made will a straight up DICK or something lol. no nuance involved, constantly berating mike with no reason to do so, even with their unknown history, like just ragging on him all the time and never backing down, even when mike isn’t engaging (side note: giant personal pet peeve of mine that max constantly gets written this way but i digress). we see in the show that will is often snarky and sarcastic and will stand up for himself when needed, especially with mike — which imo is another sign of will’s trust in him and their bond, that he can be honest with mike and not fear genuine retribution, and in acswy, he knows mike will meet him where he’s at. he sometimes isn’t afraid to hit a sore spot, but he would never ever just be a jerk for the hell of it -> we even see him apologize after their fight in s4, despite it clearly being a very emotional moment for him and a lot of truth behind what he was saying. whether he intended for it to come out that way or not, he still felt bad for reacting that way and apologized to mike’s face about it. likewise, there’s a reason acswy will acts the way he does with mike specifically, and we were also intentional with making mike match his energy like he does in canon, which will counts on, even — the way these boys BICKER, oh my god — and he has his own ways of pushing will’s buttons which prove to be very effective. even in the early chapters there are a lot of moments of softness and real friendship between them that (we hope!!) make it pretty clear that it takes some effort to maintain this facade, that there is more than enough of their “canon” bond and dynamic and chemistry where being friends and having fun together is a much more natural state to exist in, and is where they usual end up during those brief periods where they let that mask slip. same principle if we had made mike some uber-jerk who had completely different interests than he does in the show (we are so glad that book annotator and zelda fan mike wheeler is ringing true for you all ☺️), or someone who’s super self confident and popular and charming (outside of will’s very unreliable pov) once he and will start hooking up. i think most people would look at that and look back at canon mike wheeler and say yeah that is Not my mike, because making will an actual asshole or making mike any of these things would be going against core character traits that are central to their arcs in the show. will wouldn’t be will if he was generally a confrontational dick, and mike wouldn’t be mike if he was popular and exuded self confidence and so on. that’s just not them! so to summarize, i guess the question to us is more along the lines of “would they ‘not do this’ in the show out of circumstance/lack of necessity (e.g: canon byler going to the same schools until s4, never having a reason for rivalry to develop, growing up living in close proximity to each other and all of their mutual friends, etc) or would they ‘not do this’ in the show because it’s antithetical to the way they have been written?” we find it much more interesting to put a character in a situation and then essentially work backwards in a way to see how they would react to it, rather than putting them in situations that correlate to things we have seen before, and therefore would probably result in them reacting in a way we have seen them do before.
and now coming back to what i think you were actually asking: i think my biggest tip to making those references without it being said outright is honestly just to have faith in both your readers And the creative choices you make. which sounds like a bit of a cop out answer but i simply can’t understate the important of trusting your readers to pick up what you’re putting down, and to trust that they’ll read between the lines for you. a lot of my favorite characterization moments in aus are ones that are really really subtle, where a character does or says something that is clearly a callback to something in the source media, but it isn’t explained in a way that’s actually calling attention to it — it always seems much more natural that way, like whatever they did is just a progression of who they are in that story instead of the author trying to make a point or force a connection. just off the top of my head a small example might be how i see so many authors in non-magic/no upside down aus still make will really struggle with the cold, often just as a throwaway line or paragraph which imo is much more effective for me than trying to explain why he’s feeling this way. or having him enjoy the same media as in the show in a slightly varied and less direct way (e.g: being into the new star wars shows as a continuation of his canon interests, putting him in theater club to play off of the posters we saw in his room, etc). i think it also helps to have something specific in mind that you’re trying to tie back, like an important moment for that character’s story or something that stood out in the source material. like, i love writing lucas and dustin bickering over stupid stuff bc it takes me back to them in s1 in the principal’s office or s2 in general, or one of my personal favs in my own fics was one where i had will be on a constant rotation of fun patterned socks. he’s creative, he’s an artist, it’s (hopefully) a pretty clear connection to make once i write it in, and i really do think a modern version of him would get a kick out of something like that! and sometimes people just won’t pick up on what you’re trying to say and that’s okay too! everyone reads fics a little differently so some connections might be more obvious to some people than others and so on. from my experience as a reader, i find it pretty easy to connect the dots between an intentional and thoughtful moment of characterization vs one that doesn’t quite hit the nail on the head, or the author felt the need to spell out for the reader which maybe took me out of the moment a little too much or something. to me, making those choices and translating canon to an au is honestly the hardest part, especially with a modern au and a show like st that is So defined by the period it’s set in, so if you’ve already got that out of the way i genuinely think you have the rest of it in the bag as well. unless you worked through it in the month it took me to get to this in which case i am so so so sorry LOL
okay that’s been my word vomit of the day, hopefully any of this made sense or was useful at all, but thank you again for your kind words and support and for thinking to ask us! always always happy to chat writing, even if it takes me a million words to do it 😗
#the note about people saying acswy is ooc is more to point out that even if you are really intentional and thoughtful about characterizatio#sometimes it doesn’t translate for everyone or they use a different metric to evaluate ooc-ness than you might which is inevitable and also#totally fine! as long as you have your reasons and are confident in them that’s all that matters i think#i had even more i wanted to say but then i realized that it’s very easy to read this and forget what my og point was#it was going to be about sneakers guy will bc that doesn’t get touched on as much as the mike with pins thing does but it is important to M#*ME#and relevant to characterization i promise. anyways#i keep being cut off in the tags .#i feel winded. so sorry you did Not ask for all of that#i think i covered thea’s bases from when i asked her if i could answer this and her input#but she can add stuff in a rb if needed. ok anyways bye bye#i love to talk. if you haven’t noticed#asks#writing process#i have my thoughts about mike characterization specifically as well. but that is a post for Later
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