#she got them bambi eyes b ye

[cloveroctobers]

BURN — DANTE TORRES: [Summer Writings]

A/N: Don’t fall over, yes this is a part two to one of my previous works which can be found here + we only saw a sprinkle of Mr. Bambi eyes since the last time I wrote the first piece because we clearly know who the show is catered to but we won’t go too deep on that lol.

🏷️: @darqchilddaydreamz

WARNINGS: Dante taking his job seriously, slight crossover with other shows such as: Chicago fire (character mentioned at best) + Abbott Elementary, language, she/reader now has a name for story purposes, mentions of addiction, mental health and drugs, slight plot with references to the final episodes of this last season, and me bringing you nothing but angst!

ོ༘₊⁺☀︎₊⁺⋆.˚ ོ༘₊⁺☀︎₊⁺⋆.˚ ོ༘₊⁺☀︎₊⁺⋆.˚ ོ༘₊⁺☀︎₊⁺⋆.˚ ོ༘₊⁺☀︎₊⁺⋆.˚ ོ༘₊⁺☀︎₊⁺⋆.˚ ོ༘

June’s air is a great contrast to what March once was. She can smell the grilling of food in the warm breeze as her face is turned towards the open passenger window and…shes hesitant. Which is a foreign feeling but it demanded to be felt. She can hear the squeal of laughter from children as they patter down the sidewalks, simply being children and that makes her heart swell to see they that still had their innocence.

There’s a mixture of Reggaeton and 2000’s r&b playing on different sides of the block and she’s reminiscent to many summer days on this same street as a teen, no JLO. Her fingertips are resting on the door handle, staring at the brick home and she knows she’s always welcome but things have been different since that night. It’s not like Dante would ever be nonexistent in her life, there was no timeline where she could imagine that happening but life really happened since then.

Dante went off and dug deeper into his case so communication was a bit tougher until it was all over. The only way she knew that was mainly from Momma Catalina who had called to chat with her, wondering when she was going to stop by (since the older woman missed her son’s friend’s pretty face—her words) and have dinner with the both of them soon because she also liked hearing the praises on her go to dish: Jocón from the younger woman. She also knew Dante’s case was over because the texts weren’t just a simple sentence and he would incorporate voice notes like he used to do. Yet the friends made no plans to come around despite being on each other’s minds. However she kept busy, like she always did when Dante got caught up in a case and she was a working woman herself, so she also knew how to keep her head on what she strived to do in life.

They were still parallel even if they weren’t face to face.

Now she has a case of her own, being brought in and working with forensics to figure out this new fatal strand that’s been killing kids as young as being in their preteens and may or may not have a connection to a serial killer as well. She already guessed that it did before a certain someone got in contact with her. It was heavy work and not typically the field she worked close with in years—since triggers were a thing—yet it was also the reason why she wanted to be a chemist. To make a loooong story short, she was to “blame” for her severely depressed mother’s addiction (granted her mother was now thirteen years sober) bringing opioids, unknowingly laced at the time, into the house with the intent to sell and also to try at just fourteen was the start of a lengthy journey. The reason she felt like she was to blame was her father not letting her forget it even now in her thirties. Which brings us to life in the now, being a “know-it-all,” chemist who always felt like she had a lot to prove.

Normally she did the basic boring tasks working with businesses and ensuring that their products were deemed safe for consumers rather than another serious level of crimes like murder, however she initially started out as a forensics chemist until she switched paths after it became too much on her mental. Her father felt that was a terrible decision, only thinking of the income rather than how that screwed with his daughter’s brain but she always learned how to take his words with a shard of glass. That’s right, glass. In spite of that anyone would be lying if they said she wasn’t one of the most well known in the city, going above and beyond—just behind the scenes now—to solve many cases. She preferred it that way, to herself, some may even say safe, being out of the way and she still got her thrill from figuring out what most couldn’t. And here she was over the last two weeks working this slowly building case, finding a balance of catering to her own self care by leaving the work solely behind at the lab and even engaging in a few more dates—just not with the salt and pepper haired SWAT member anymore.

Which didn’t turn sour, there was no need for that and she respected that Deacon also wanted to keep his mind on his work and his kids. He was still a good man in her eyes. Ultimately she knew that she didn’t see it working in the long run and that she didn’t have to take dating so seriously…at least that’s what she tried to tell herself.

“You seem stressed,” a voice says to her left, reminding her that she was in fact sitting beside another male that wasn’t her best friend, “you gotta roll that tension away, smell the lilacs, and then realize that there shouldn’t be any nerves right? You talk so highly about the guy…unless you want me come with?”

Immediately her eyes widen and she’s shaking her head, although the brunette means well she tells him, “no…I appreciate it though, Manny. it’s just the caffeine wearing off I guess. I’ll only be five to ten minutes tops, I need to get back home anyway and into a eucalyptus bath.”

Manny raises his brows, “a bath you say? You do know that it’s eighty degrees out here right?”

It was the woman’s turn to raise her own brows, silently challenging the man who breathes out a laugh with his signature wicked grin.

“Alright, alright.” Manny’s hands are raised in surrender, “I’m sensing hot showers are a thing too all year around? Which I don’t get if summer is here but if that’s your thing then I’ll accept it.”

“As you should.”

“I do.” He places a large hand against his chest still grinning, “there’s no static on my end.”

“Oh you’re such an east coaster,” she playfully rolls her eyes, “but you’re kinda great.”

“That’s what they tell me.” He winks as he reaches over to give her shoulder a light squeeze, “you’ll be fine out there I don’t doubt it. Now go and celebrate your best friend’s birthday and don’t forget the two slices of cake.”

She leans against the outside of the door, frowning at the man who shakes his head, “yeah that would be too much, considering we haven’t even met, right?”

She gives him a small smile in response and a point before she spins on her heels, taking the short walk towards the Torres’ household. Dante didn’t have much family here in Chicago, most being spread all over the globe, leaving it to always be just Catalina and Dante. From as long as she’s known the mother and son, Momma Catalina was always on the phone having long distance calls with family members but they seemed to be missing in action when she was being beat on nearly every day.

Moving along the side of the house towards the music and charcoal, her hands are behind her back as she nervously makes her way to the backyard. She likes to say it’s the social anxiety rather than seeing Dante but perhaps it was a mixture of both. Most of the faces are probably neighbors but it’s a nice crowd as she instantly spots the buzzed man up ahead, dressed in a short sleeve white loose fitting button up v-neck, tattoos on his arms are on full display, along with the chain that sways from his neck as he dumps chunks of ice into a cooler that Upton is holding open for him.

“Whaaat? Who let you out the cage? I thought they kept experiments locked down, Coty.” The voice of Atwater pulls her gaze to the man who’s smirking down at her with a beer in one hand.

Coty scoffed although there’s a smile on her lips, “You always know how to give the most warmest welcomes, Kev.”

He laughs as he swoops in with a side hug, “Well I had to say something with you sneaking in here like you about to steal something and roll out.”

“Not my style.”

“Yeah, just like you not interacting with nobody.”

“I just got here!”

Kevin nods his head letting the woman have that one before adding, “and how long do you plan on staying?”

“I haven’t decided yet.”

His round eyes give her a look of disbelief while she shields her eyes from his stare. Laughing to himself he taps her arm, “well in that case, I won’t hold you any longer to go talk to your boy. Just as a fair warning to you, don’t touch that potato salad. Somebody made it and it got peas, carrots, and I think I even saw some apples all up in it.”

Tilting your head to the side you say, “…sounds like a Russian salad.”

“A what?” Kevin cups a hand over his ear although he’s sure he’s heard Coty correctly.

She just smiles at him, giving his arm a squeeze before she turns to make her way to Dante, who is not where she’s last seen him. Coty pauses, scanning the backyard again and sends a wave to Burgess and Ruzek who are sitting thigh to thigh on the picnic bench with a face full of smiles. They echo a wave back in Coty’s direction before some hands plop down on her forearms.

“Seraphina, mija! You made it.” Momma Catalina greets before sinking into Coty’s frame.

She was a tiny woman who still managed to have the kindest of hearts given what she’s been through. Coty grips the woman back in a sweet embrace before they’re eye to eye again.

“Of course! Had to see the best lady in town,” Coty tells the cedar brown haired woman with a blunt bob full of ringlets.

Her grin reaches her summer green eyes which mirrors her son’s as she almost bounced on her toes, “that’s right! Didn’t know it had to take you forever and a day to come see about me.”

“I’m sorry about that…”

She blows a raspberry, “no need to dwell on that because I already know and all is forgiven now that you’re here! Let’s get you something to eat so you can enjoy the party.”

“Oh no, Momma Cat. I can’t stay.”

Her usual soft stare darkens for a moment and it’s actually scary to witness when you irk this pocket full of sunshine’s nerves, “you will stay, eat, and dance. You are family. Then you and my son will fix whatever this bullshit is.”

“Dante and I are fine.” It sounded weak coming from Coty’s lips but she knew she couldn’t fool Catalina. Momma Cat was the first to see something special between her son and Seraphina (even before Séan) before they ever did so hearing this felt like a big insult.

That’s when the woman shifts in her slippers, fists digging into her hips as she peers up at the woman in front of her, “Seraphina! do not lie to me in my own home, mija. I will not have it and you will do as I say.” Catalina clapped her hands as if she was dusting off Coty’s worries, although this was only adding to it.

Coty felt like she was being scolded and her own mother wasn’t even here! Sure she was grown and didn’t have to take being yelled at but she would never disrespect Catalina, especially when she’s done so much for her growing up and when her own parents didn’t want to be bothered with her when she was up to no good.

“Ma…is everything okay?” Dante’s quiet tone could be heard over the music, along with his body heat from behind the pair.

Coty can feel the hairs on the back of her neck stand up just from Dante speaking and she’s been sweating since she got out of Manny’s car.

Catalina flashes a smile at her son, reaching to cup his face as Coty steps to the side for the two to have their moment, “Everything’s perfect! Your best gift is here so enjoy it.”

She whispers the last part to him with a wink while Dante just scoffs with a shake of his head as he watches his mother start to dance with a neighbor on her way by. He turns to face his old friend and let’s out a sigh, “see what you started? I was expecting the dancing to start the moment I woke up but you seem to always bring it out of her.”

Momma Catalina came from a background of dancers and it was a dream that became distant once she gave birth to Dante and knew that passion wouldn’t pay the bills. Dante’s birth father passed when he was around six so everything really fell onto Catalina’s shoulders and seemed to keep piling up.

She was never regretful over how her life played out but rather thankful that Dante chose her to show her how to truly love. There was never sadness in her words when she showed the stack of photos of herself in her younger years and her joy shined whenever she still broke out into a move. In the end, you do what you have to do for family.

“Me?” Coty points to herself innocently although she’s not really at fault this time, “Maybe you should check if the Aguardiente is still available.”

Dante nods in realization, “you’re right…that could be it. I’ve been running around since this thing started so who knows how much is left and it’s supposed to be my day.”

“I thought you loved birthday’s?” Coty’s response is sarcastic, knowing just how much Dante dreaded his birthday but was right with Catalina in honoring your special day around the sun.

The look Dante sends his friend makes her snort out some laughter, “We still have six more hours at least.”

Letting out a low whistle, she lightly grips his shoulder, “you still have six hours. I can disappear with ease.”

Dante groans, “you’ll take me with you, won’t you?”

His light green’s were pleading as Coty slipped an arm across his waist, leaning into his shoulder, “stop being a little turd, have some more drinks and you’ll get through it.”

Dante grumbles, “I’ll remember that when it’s your birthday.”

“Uh…i’m going to Vegas.”

“When did we decide that?”

Coty lifts her head from his shoulder, “You should have gone to France with all this we talk.”

“Nah, not my vibe.” He says before peering down at her, “…thanks for coming. I was beginning to lose my mind.”

“Why?” Coty questions as she looks around at all the faces in the backyard, “You had the team here with you at least.”

“Yeah…but that’s not the same and you know it.” He honestly says as his eyes begins to trace over Coty’s features.

She couldn’t stomach the way he was looking at her and it made her guess how many drinks he’s had himself this evening. The amount of tenderness and care in his green hues was the same reason why they were in a constant battle in the first place.

“How’s Gloria?” Flies out of her mouth before she can even comprehend it.

Dante sharply inhales at this, looking elsewhere in slight annoyance before shrugging, “gone.”

“Gone where?”

“Can’t discuss that with you, Nina.” The way he’s the only one that uses her name this way, is enough to let her know that he means business.

Mostly everyone calls her by her last name: Coty, which she preferred (he’s not everyone) but he’s firm in his stance—closing himself off to that part of him and that’s not like Dante. Sure he’s not this open book by any means but it’s not like he has a piece of him that she hasn’t seen. That particular piece was still there but reopened by someone like Gloria. Someone that could bring out his skeletons and glamorize it to match her own pain. Coty knew Gloria was not the answer to whatever it is Dante was looking for and now that Gloria was suddenly gone, it will hold a weight he was willing to carry on his back—that he shouldn’t have to—but Coty was not willing to help him with that.

She said that months ago and she still meant that shit. She never wanted to pay for someone else’s mistakes. Coty knew how to love Dante but he wouldn’t let her, not in that way.

Only Dante and Gloria know what they’ve been up to since they decided to fuck around.

And perhaps they found out.

“…who’s this?” Dante suddenly lifted his chin, stepping forward a bit as Coty stood to the side of him.

Her eyes follow his line of sight to see Manny, searching around the backyard for her. Once he found her, he smiles, waving a bit before he starts making his way over. She deeply sighs as Dante sends a look her way, silently questioning her before the brunette gets closer.

“Hey, Having fun?”

Coty molds her lips together while Manny looks back and forth between the two, either oblivious to the tension or trying this best to ignore it.

“Phina-Mena, you left something—

Manny starts but Dante cuts him off, “sorry man, who are you?”

“Oh! How rude of me.” He frees one of his hands, “I’m Manny, friend of Seraphina’s. And you must be Dante! I’ve heard good things about you so it’s nice to finally meet you, bro.”

‘Finally?’ He cautiously puts his hand out to shake Manny’s but his eyes are hot on Seraphina’s who shifts on her feet, lightly swaying from one foot to the other.

“Can’t say the same…Nina hasn’t mentioned you at all.”

“Oh well…don’t worry about it, y’all been busy.” Manny shrugs it off, not the least bit phased.

Dante nods his head and folds his arms, “right but…I’ve got time now. So you said you’re Manny. What do you do Manny?”

“I proudly work for the Philadelphia school district and I’m just here for a conference but it also doesn’t hurt that I get to hang out with Phina-Mena!” He boasts as he sends finger-guns at Seraphina while Dante finds his personality to be a lot.

And that was saying enough since Seraphina was mostly introverted and easily got exhausted around people…except for him.

Dante rounds off another inquiry, “where did you two meet?”

She huffs but Dante ignores her, awaiting all the information he can get.

Manny talks with his hands, “Down at that bar with the sticky floors along with one of the floorboards being this naturally strange color of purple that takes up a good portion of the place? My apologies, I forgot the name.”

That gets Dante frowning as he casts a glance over at Seraphina who’s chewing on her bottom lip now, “A bar? You’re not really a bar kinda woman.”

Manny shrugs his shoulders, “eh…people can surprise you.”

“Did you go alone…were you alone?” The second half of that question is directed at Seraphina and now she was getting agitated, this Dante could tell as she side eyed him.

Manny also gazed at the woman, picking up on the tension now. “You know my dad was an officer too so this is feelin’ a little too familiar for me.”

“Really, what precinct?”

“Dante, cut the shit.” Coty bites but the buzzed haired man just blinks not missing a beat.

“It’s only right I get to know your new friend since he already seems to know so much about me.”

“Well not everything…” Manny laughs, trying to ease the heaviness in the air but Dante’s not backing off.

Dante was suspicious and his guard had to be up so he redirects the conversation back, “so you said you two met at the bar…I’m assuming the Violet Branch?”

“Yeah,” Manny snaps with amazement crossing his bearded face, “that’s right! You know the place?”

Dante hardened his stare as he turns his head to Seraphina, “uh huh. That’s Sarge’s spot.”

Manny turns his eyes into slits, “sarge? As in sergeant. Oh was that the guy you were—

“Manny!” Coty interjects, “I think this interrogation is over. Why don’t you go mingle with the rest for a little, while I finish talking to the birthday boy.”

“No, No.” Dante shakes his head, “Let him finish, Nina.”

Manny’s eyes are moving back and forth between the two who are holding each other’s stare, “oh…I see what’s happening here. I’m doing that thing where I’m talking too much. I’m just gonna leave this…on that lovely gift table over there.”

And with that Manny swiftly points and drags himself to the left where most of the party goers are eating or dancing.

“He’s…interesting.” Dante’s stare lingers on the man who quickly strikes up a conversation with one of his nosy neighbors.

Coty scoffs, “the hell is your problem?”

“I don’t have one.”

“So you think it’s cool that you just grilled into my friend like that?”

“Is that really all he is? Because you didn’t tell me about him at all.” Dante’s jaw is tight, almost like he’s irritated with the woman for leaving this out over a few phone calls and then also bringing him here to his house with no type of heads up.

She attempts to reason with him, “We just started being somewhat normal again, Tay.”

“That didn’t stop you from telling me about things ending with Deacon.”

“You asked. I didn’t just bring him up.”

“I see so that was your way of what? Being fair by bringing up Gloria? Why bring her up if you know that topic bothers you so much?” Dante searched Coty’s eyes, trying to understand what she was doing and up to although his gut was telling him everything he needed to know.

Coty furrows her brows, “Because I’m being a good friend and checking in on you since you know? I can’t exactly do that when you’re undercover.”

Dante rubs at his jaw, “I can’t say I fully believe that. I feel like this was a tactic to get me riled up because I developed a relationship with Gloria—as if I don’t already know who you’ve been around since you’re that important to me. First it was Deacon, then it was that firefighter Jake Gibson, and now this Manny guy? It’s a game for you and I don’t want to play.”

Coty laughs in shock as Dante walks away from her, “are you fucking serious? And then you’re gonna walk away from me after that?”

“Yup.” Dante says over his shoulder as he makes his way back to the cooler.

Coty isn’t having that as she charges after him, watching as he squats and begins searching through the ice. She desperately tries to keep her voice leveled but she can feel her skin getting hot and her eyes beginning to burn out of frustration.

“I don’t even want to know how you know about Jake ghosting me—

Dante looks up at her, “he didn’t ghost you, he checked himself into rehab. Stop selling yourself short.”

Her mouth can’t help but to drop open at that.

“Dante.”

“Yes?”

“You can’t go searching up every guy that I might want to give a chance…I shouldn’t even have to tell you that,” her frown is so deep that it should be permanent for the rest of this conversation, “and I wouldn’t just bring a random stranger to your house. I told him to wait in the car but I left your gift.”

Dante snickers and drops his head with a shake of his head, “that’s no better, Nina! You don’t know him and I don’t know him.”

“Well I’m getting to because that’s my choice! He doesn’t even live here and you’re acting like this. And you don’t have the right to get upset with who I spend time with while you do whatever the hell you want anyway, clearly.” Coty crosses her arms while Dante is upright now.

His heat is radiating again as he stands in front of Coty, “I know.”

“You know?”

“Yes and I wish I could say I’m sorry, as if that’ll ever be enough when I know it’ll never be especially when you’re the one who said you’re not over me.”

“That was how many weeks ago? I didn’t think you’d still be worrying about what was said when who knows what you’ve been up to with Gloria. You say a relationship but judging by the fresh burn mark on your neck, tells me it’s been anything but loving.”

Dante exhales, “stop.”

“Stop what? Caring?”

“No, stop trying to tell me you told me so.”

“I wouldn’t gloat yet I’m not sure what it is exactly you want from me, as your friend?” Coty quizzed him, “To stay by your side and just continue accepting everything for what it is? I did that before and now look where we are.”

Dante blinks, trying to get his thoughts together.

“She was wrong from the start and you knew that. And that burn is enough to remind you of that forever.”

“And what about me huh? What about what I’ve done to you all these years, those scars I gave to you and you still stayed while she had to leave. You don’t think I’m not dealing with all that?”

That alone leaves Coty stunned.

To know Dante from his late preteen years all throughout many phases of their lives to this point now, was so much at times that Dante knew just how much it stung. He couldn’t give Coty what she wanted and not in the way she wanted because of his own issues. If it stung for him, he had to know that it burned for his dear friend Seraphina Coty. He tried to be alone, almost begged Coty to get out of his life by the time they were eighteen but there was a constant need for their souls to be intertwined.

It felt like bleeding internally when they were apart but somehow they were still functioning. It’s been a minute since that damp spring day but the earth never stopped spinning. When the good was present, it felt like a summer sunrise compared to a fire tornado the two of them could unleash.

“I—

Coty starts but stomps against the grass, catches both of the two’s attention, revealing Kevin who’s appears to be getting off his phone, “My fault for breaking this up but Voight needs us.”

“Now?” Dante asks, practically forcing his eye contact to his team member.

“Pronto.”

Dante dips his head, his hand going out to gently touch Coty’s elbow, “Looks like I have to go.”

Kevin glances between the two before adding, “Uh, he needs all of us. Including Coty.”

Dante’s widens his eyes at this news and this confirms what his gut was saying all along when Manny dropped the crumbs. Coty was about to get wrapped up in the same danger she warned him about. He couldn’t say what he felt in that moment since time was always of the essence but he’s aware that Coty saw the eruption in his eyes just then.

She sparked the flame that Dante didn’t want to spread.

He wasn’t sure how he could protect her after this. His blood was boiling in the passenger side of Kevin’s car and he wanted nothing more than to tell Kevin to pull the car over and to leave Coty on the side of the road, sending a ride to bring her back home and away from it all like she conditioned herself to be.

Dante knew Seraphina like the ink on his back and with her stare burning into the back of his neck, eyes probably focused on his new mark, he peered over his shoulder at her, meeting her view and was aware that she always finished what she started, whether he liked it or not.

“Happy birthday,” she mouths to him with a small smile but it’s anything but comforting.

The glare on Dante’s face is evident as he turns back to face the front with a roll of his eyes, rubbing at the tightness in his jaw once more while slouching down in the passenger seat.

June’s air is a great contrast to what March once was.

ོ༘₊⁺☀︎₊⁺⋆.˚ ོ༘₊⁺☀︎₊⁺⋆.˚ ོ༘₊⁺☀︎₊⁺⋆.˚ ོ༘₊⁺☀︎₊⁺⋆.˚ ོ༘₊⁺☀︎₊⁺⋆.˚ ོ༘₊⁺☀︎₊⁺⋆.˚ ོ༘

-> Part Three!

[spnexploration]

Collared part 30

Pairing: Dean x Reader eventually

Series summary: Sam and Dean save a woman from where she has been held as a slave by a witch. But things turn dark whenever they try to take her magic collar off, leaving them with a slave to look after and a curse to break.

Episode summary: Dean tries to teach you to use an angel blade.

Warnings: none particularly

Word count: 1.4k

Series masterlist | Supernatural writing masterlist

Part 29 <- -> Part 31

“Are you still looking for Azaneth?” you asked the next morning at breakfast, sitting on your cushion on the floor.

“Yes,” Dean answered honestly. “Something on your mind?”

“Umm, I want to learn how to defend myself.”

“Sweetheart, I ain't intending for you to see him unless he's safely restrained. We don't need to put you through that again.”

You nodded. “I, umm, I’d still like to know.”

He studied your face for a second. He wondered if your hesitation was because you were worried about his reaction, worried about Azaneth, or something else. Then he thought that maybe it was just because you were asking for something for yourself, which always seemed hard for you. “Ok, I’ll teach you.”

“Thank you,” you said quietly.

---

Dean took you to the gym. “Alright, this is an angel blade. Kills angels and demons. Maybe some other stuff too, but that’s not the point. Let’s see what you’ve got.”

He handed it to you, handle first. “Alright, swish it around a little, get a feel for the weight.” You did so, and immediately dropped it. It clattered to the floor. You squealed and jumped back, trying to avoid cutting off your own toes. “Christ,” he muttered.

“Sorry, the handle was slippery!”

 “It’s called a hilt, not a handle. Maybe we should start with something a little less sharp or you’re going to end up with no feet. I’ll be back, gonna see if we have practice daggers or something.”

He eventually came back with two plastic kids toy swords. “These are from a time we had to dress up and sneak into a Halloween party. We’ll have to find something a bit weightier another time, but for now we can practise some moves.”

He taught you a few basic blocking moves, but you could tell you weren’t very good. You felt dispirited, depressed that you couldn’t even hold a blade much less wield one.

“Hey, hey,” Dean interrupted your thoughts. “None of that. I can see you getting all up in your head. You’re not doing badly, you’re just not used to it. You do not go to one swimming lesson and the next minute bring home a Michael Phelps medal haul from the Olympics. Same thing for ganking monsters.”

You smiled weakly, appreciating his attempts at humour but struggling to get out of your emotions.

“Come on, Bambi, I’ll let you pick what’s for dinner.”

---

You had to expect it. You’d been the one to bring up Azaneth that day, after all. So when the nightmares came again that night, you only had yourself to blame.

You shivered in your blanket on the floor. You couldn’t shake the image of him towering over you, ready to strike. Even better, now your subconscious had helpfully added the imagery of you dropping the angel blade the instant you held it. Thanks for the vote of confidence, self.

You tried to lie down again, but every time you closed your eyes you saw him. You were so very alone.

Tears sprung to your eyes.

You thought about your options. You didn’t want to go drinking again. That hadn’t really helped last time anyway. Dean had told you to wake him up if you had a nightmare, but you couldn’t stomach the thought of doing it. It was too embarrassing, too personal, too… much.

You gathered your blanket and pillow and headed to the corridor. You needed to be able to hear them, to feel less alone.

You found your spot in front of Dean’s door. You could hear his light snoring, his movement. It was reassuring, there was someone else around. Someone who knew exactly how to fight demons.

You curled up and fell asleep.

---

Sam turned down the corridor to his room and stopped in his tracks. You were curled up, with a blanket and pillow, against Dean’s door. His heart broke for you.

He crept back around the corner and pulled out his phone, quickly pulling up Dean on the speed dial.

“Wasswrong?” Dean slurred after the second ring. Sam heard the faint click of a gun and knew Dean was getting ready to come charging out.

“Shh,” Sam said. “It’s nothing dangerous.”

“Ok. Why’d you wake me up then?”

“Y/N is asleep outside your door.”

“What?”

“She’s curled up, on the floor. Against your door. I think she’s done it before, I’ve seen her going into her room with a blanket first thing in the morning before.”

“Oh man, poor kid. Alright, thanks.”

---

Dean put his gun back under his pillow, his phone on the bedside table, and then crossed quietly to the door. He gently eased it open, not sure if you’d be leaning against it, but it didn’t feel any heavier.

You looked so peaceful in your sleep, but it was heartbreaking that you were doing so on the floor in the corridor. Something must’ve upset you to bring you out here. He wished you felt comfortable enough to just wake him up when you were upset, instead of trying to find your own coping mechanisms. Still, he’d take finding you sleeping in weird places over finding you drunk at 8:30am.

He crouched down and gently touched your shoulder. “Heya, Bambi,” he said quietly.

Your eyes flew open. He dropped his hand, worried at the panicked look on your face.

“Sorry for waking you up, but it’s ok. I’m not going to hurt you. You’re ok.”

You seemed to take a deep breath and then nodded, the wild look in your eyes gone now that you had worked out he was no threat.

“What’s going on, sweetheart?” You bit your lip and looked at the ground. He guessed you were embarrassed. “It’s ok, I just want to make sure you’re ok.” You still didn’t respond. “Was it another nightmare?”

You nodded, once.

“Does it make you feel better to sleep out here rather than in your room?”

You nodded again.

“Do you want to come sleep in my room? Or in Sammy’s?” You brought your knees to your chest and buried your head in them. “Hey, hey, it’s ok. I’m sorry if I scared you, but I thought it might be better than sleeping in the corridor.”

You paused, and then gave a tiny nod.

“Ok, you nod for which one you want. Sammy’s room? My room?” You nodded slightly when he said his room. “Ok sweetheart, let’s get you set up. We can make this more comfy than a blanket on the floor.”

He quickly went to your room and gathered some of the bedding he’d put in there for you, bringing it back to his room. “Now, just because I moved this stuff doesn’t mean you have to stay in here. If at any point you want me to move it back, or take it to Sam’s, or take it anywhere else in the bunker, you just tell me. You can wake me up if you need. I won’t mind at all.”

You trailed after him into his room, clutching your pillow to your chest. The blanket dangled down onto the floor from where it was clutched in one hand. He wanted to gather you in his arms and hug you, but he wasn’t sure you wanted that, and he didn’t want to make you any more uncomfortable than you already were.

“Do you want to be closer to the door or further away?” You nodded to further away, so he took your bedding the other side of his bed. He set it all up for you, trying to make it as comfortable as possible.

“Is that ok?”

You nodded again, before saying very quietly, “Thank you.”

“Any time, sweetheart. Now, if my snoring annoys you, or if anything at all happens, you wake me up, ok?”

You seemed hesitant to move, so he turned around and started to climb back into bed, hoping that you’d be more confident without him watching your every move. It worked. Once you seemed settled in your bedding, he asked, “Do you want me to leave the lamp on or turn it off?”

“Off, please,” you mumbled.

“Ok, good night, Bambi.”

---

You lay in the dark, listening to Dean’s breathing. You felt so much better to be in here, with him between you and the door and his reassuring sounds that you weren’t alone.

You drifted off to a dreamless sleep.

.

.

.

Tag list:

@malindacath

@stoneyggirl2

@iprobablyshipit91

@tiggytaylor

@ellie-andthemachine

@muhahaha303

@deans-spinster-witch

@mrswhozeewhatsis

@kazsrm67

@foxyjwls007

@sassy-pelican

@saiyanprincessswanie

@sojuxxi

@ilovedean-spn2

@lacilou

@agirlwithdemonblood

@rachiem4-blog

@miss-madness67

@iamsapphine

@where-the-river-bends

@globetrotter28

@skybunnybaby

@icequeen1371

[baekhvuns]

OMG HELLO BAEKSSS!!!

It has been such a long time 😭

I have SAUR much to tell you!

Ok first of all let's start with how I got a part time job as a second year student and 😭 THERE'S THIS GUY THERE AND MY FREAKING MIND CANNOT COMPREHEND HIS BEAUTY! Like istg he looks like a mix of yunho and soobin?? His lips are an exact copy of soobin's! (Don't ask why il abt his lips-) And obviously he's so tall. (The part-time job is at a restaurant btw) and when I tell you he's probably the reason so many people even come to that restaurant like I'm not saying all of them but I'm sure half the portion of them high school girls 😭 but I kinda feel lonely there since I'm bad at socialising but dw I'm working on that.

My phone just acted up- anyways, it acted up again 😭 so I was saying i read those asks regarding the whole ff thing. And y'all aren't wrong, Bcz these days the plot is porn 😃. I mean have you seen those fic with tons of warning at hand that's just a collection of kinks 😭 and the whole bsf's dad trope??? Like atp y'all require grass! Or maybe a whole dang rainforest!

But other than that I reread your fics just to feel something 🥹 and yes I'm positive I felt something Bcz now I'm lovesick. Someone send me my Mr Park, my bg, MY DUKEEE 😭 oh I also dedicated one song to each of the hwa fics, (even tho I've read the other members fics, ...hwa just hits diff.) Okokok! Pls don't judge my music taste tho 😩 [the way I said one nd gv out a whole playlist smh]

Rewrite the stars- if I didn't put rewrite the stars, the greatest showman I'd be considered a criminal! You belong with me too!!

The trouble with hating you- ok ok so Polaroid love for the whole happy moments but then she's in the rain by The Rose for when hwa breaks yn's heart and aurora (Ateez)

Mr and Mrs park- MAMA IM IN LOVE WITH A CRIMINAL 😩 Britney spearsss and i discovered a new song that's called "old love" by Yuji and boi, i get flashbacks to that confession scene! Bambi (baekhyun), mhm (kai) and peaches were made for this, OK HEAR ME OUT FILTER BY JIMIN-

Duke and the general- I GOT SO MANY!!

- day and night (Jung seung hwan)

-But it's destiny (10cm)

-breaking down (Ailee)

-lover (TS)

-My everything (Ariana Grande)

I could go on-

Khronos- Tears, trauma o wait one last time by Ariana, young and beautiful Lana del rey, stay with me (chanyeol and punch) all about you (Ateez) euphoria too

Just friends- ohhh lemme whip my nsfw song playli-

-circus (Britney mother spears)

-Angel eyes (ABBA)

-into you (Ariana)

- they don't know about us (1D)

- luxurious (Gwen Stefani)

- pillow talk (Zayn) AHEM-

- love talk (wayv) AHEEMMM

-cream soda (exo) aiahwjahsjsj

-Candy (baekhyun) AGH-

Ok but in the end we never knew if yn and hwa got married but like imagine if they had decided to and they hv their kids! Like the leading models get married and just think THE VISUAL hwayoung would hv (I mean I obv don't mean I'm the yn 😭) and then yn takes her for a red carpet or something when she's like 9 or 10 and then we see hwayoung directly after like 10 yrs and everyone is shocked Bcz she has the genes of her mother with the personality of her father THAT'D BE SO DOPE!

Let's not fall in love again- OK GET READY FOR THIS!

-Everytime (chen, punch)

-love sight (TXT)

-I think I'm in love again (kat dahlia) I love the irony, Bcz I also know this is what went thru hwa's brain

- I will go to you like the first snow (Ailee)

- love me like that (Sam Kim)

Bodyguard- but idk why I'd like to put some 00's nd 10s songs here bcz....it's just the vibe!

-OMG I WANT IT THT WAY 😭😭 idkw but it fits acc to me

- you drive me crazy (Britney again...I luv her sm :') )

- all of me (John legend)

- dandelions (ruth b)

- serendipity (jimin)

-a lot like love (baek a yoon)

Somehow bg's ones are kinda soft? Idk 😭but yeah this was fun to do! I love doing these things for ffs, like you'd do with movies or novels! And i hope you enjoy these too 😩🤧 anyways it's like 1:00 AM, and my phone screen feels a little too bright for my eyes 😭 gnn and bye hope you're taking care of yourselves! 💕💕💕

HELLO t’s been a while!!

omg???? a part time AND at a restaurant as a second year student?? swap places right now idc idc idc & OH??? that’s a very interesting thing u shared, when r we making the moves 🔫 chaerss u have a very y/n job, you gotta bring out your y/n-ness in these situations like ITS NEARING THE HOLIDAYS U NEVER KNOW

ur correct, i was scrolling thru some atz fics yesterday to see abt to read and all the disclaimers were: angry, handcuffs, pissed off reader x pissed off member or name calling or every kink in existence what happened to HI?? HELLO??? A RAINFOREST LMFAOOO,,, crying u guys r so nice it makes me so happy to see that u guys really enjoy the fics to the whole 😭😭 i will be back pls im defrosting!!

LMFAOOOO OKAY IM READY BC I ALSO HAD MY LISTS FROM WHEN I WROTE THESE FICS!! omg the rewrite the stars one is absolutely correct, it’s what i listened to every time i wrote that fic!

omg wait ur kinda right that fits the trouble w hating u,, i used classic by mkto for the funsies! WAIT FUCK THAT CRIMINAL FITS MR AND MRS PARK SO WELL FHWKDHWKHDKW I ALSO USED HIM & I BY HALSEY AND GEASY & IM YOURS BY ISABEL LAROSA!! duke and his general never had a song lost but i agree with everything up there 🤚🏻

omg khronus??? i used moon lovers ost the most, my love my lee hi and davichi’s songs, insterstellar BUT YOUNG AND BEAUTIFUL??? KILL ME RIVHT NOW FJWKFHEK this was my playlist for khronus

WAIT THEY DONT KNOW ABOUT US WAS A BODYGUARD HWA SONG + you & i FBWKDHK,,, just friends had the most fashion and nsfw songs, the weeknd, just friends by virginia to vegas, say it right nelly furtado, rich girl by gwen stefani, i like me better lauv, OH PILLOW TALK??? 👀 omg no bc i have a whole universe for them and ur right on track no bc imagine the two top models of the industry getting married like??? crazy i know the kids would be crazy tall too and the GENES??? wow i will draft a fic just u wait

STOP THAT LETS NOT FALL IN LOVE IS SO ACCURATE STOP IT FBKWBDKS IM IN LOVE AGAIN WAS MY SHIT!

omg no i love these i love hearing the thoughts on the different stories & what ppl think their future would be like esp for just friends, the entire industry at their wedding??? iM THERE hope u had a good sleep!! thank u for sending this in 💓

[byuqi]

im back~ so school ended a couple days ago but BOY LEMME TELL YOU I GOT TEA. okay well i honestly don’t know the full story but tea is tea so lemme spill 😋

okay so basically my two friends who imma call 🦶and🫄 are best friends but 🫄 used to be my best friend until 🦶 stole her from me last year

so they’re like those friends where if 🦶is mad at someone then automatically 🫄has to be mad at that person too or else 🦶 will get mad at 🫄

AND FOR SOME REASON 🦶 GOT MAD AT ME⁉️⁉️ like imma be fr i dont even know why she’s mad at me bc the last time i talked to her was on May 19th and we were perfectly fine but then i sprained my ankle and didnt come back until like a week and a half later and then suddenly shes mad at me?

so the way i found out 🦶was mad at me was because i was tryna talk to her but she was just ignoring me so my other friend who imma call (N) was like “hey 🦶 bambi is tryna talk to you” and then 🦶 is just like “oh i know” LIKE TF⁉️⁉️ so then (N) and i just look at each other and shrug our shoulders cause we don’t know wtf is going on with 🦶

now fast forward like a week later i still dont know why 🦶 is mad at me and now 🫄 is ignoring me too and none of our other friends know why they’re mad at me. and even tho they’re mad at me they still hang out with me and the rest of our friends at lunch they just dont talk to me and then 🦶 offers some chips to (N) and our other friend (B) and she sees me looking because i was sitting next to (N) and she says “Y a que te mires?” which means “what are you looking at?” so i just said “nothing” and she rolled her eyes then called me a bitch 😭 AND WE HAVE THIRD PERIOD TOGETHER SO I HAD TO SEE HER THERE AND SHE KEPT GLARING AT ME DURING THE WHOLE CLASS LIKE⁉️⁉️ also whenever she gets mad she doesnt tell people why shes mad and just expects them to figure it out?? like shes done this before and i’ve had to apologize even tho i didnt do anything wrong

so now lets go to the last day of school so im hanging out with (N) and (B) again and ofc 🦶 and 🫄 are there too with our other friend (M). (M) and i have always been close so i was talking to (M) and she was standing next to 🦶 and then when im talking i hear 🦶 say “no vale verga” which is kinda like “i dont care” but in a mean way so then (M) just looks at me and is like “i dont know why she’s acting like that just ignore her” so i did and then when i get home i decide to check (B)’s location bc she was supposed to come over and i notice 🫄 turned off her location and she only does that when she doesnt want to be friends anymore so im like oh shit because even tho shes not my best friend anymore like we were still friends so yeah now 🫄 isnt friends with me anymore 🧍

anyway thats all and i’ll update if i find out anything else but thats all for now

-🦌

HI BAMBI MY LOVE❤️❤️❤️❤️

well said!! tea is tea and if has to be spilled one way or another 🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️

OMG NO BC I LITERALLY HAD THE SAME THING HAPPEN TO ME THIS YEAR WHAT. 💞 and i were bsfs bc 💞 was new in the school. then ☠️ came along and they became friends and 💞 left me like i was nothing. im talking like i was literally the person who made her who she is rn in the school like bffr girl🤨🤨🤨🤨

lets be real here? we all know stinky feet tryna be you fr🙄🙄��🙄🙄🙄🙄on a real note they’re both fucked up in the head. yes i get that thing of “if shes mad at you im mad at you” BUT ATLEAST HAVE A REASON TOO??? like it doesn’t make sense to me at all. shes a real bitch for ignoring you straight up like that and still saying “i know shes talking to me” BFFR?????? see me personally i would immediately remove myself from them two as soon as possible. you know why i think stinky feet is mad at you? bc she knows you could have ms preggo back whenever you wanted to bc you two were bsf. I SWEAR ITS ALSAYS LIKE THAT TELL ME IM WRONG🤣

but at the end of the day, remove yourself from them 2. fuck what they think and fuck what other people think, its your life and youre not gonna let 2 dumbass bitches ruin it for you bc they “dont like you” MAN STFU😭😭😭also FUCK MS PREGGO🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕

neways, thanks for the tea bambi😘😘😘i love listening (reading) drama!! ily and stay safe❤️

[compatiissante]

“ no , i won’t do what i’m told . that’d involve listening to what people tell me ” / ba'al

♡  -  @WOLFPUPY   TWEETS   AS   STARTER   PROMPTS  .

      “….i mean, that’s a mood, but— i get yelled at or hit for it. you don’t get yelled at or hit for it, do you?”  this is the quietest she’s ever been, but at least she’s just leaning against him with her question.

[sugarcoatedstarkey]

I could use some help

jj maybank x reader

summary- when john b’s next door neighbour comes knocking.

warning- smut, Oral. [18+]

a/n- enjoy the scenario I had in my head all morning, also sorry its unedited atm :)

(Gif credit to @jjouterbanks )

JJ stood in the middle of the living room; John B had just left to see Sarah. He was sweaty and oiled up from being outside all day helping clean up the mess in the garden. He had come inside to quench his thirst with an ice-cold beer.

Spotting the soccer ball, he began to practice his tricks, paying no attention to his surroundings until a loud knock startled him and the ball went flying into the screen door. The person behind the door let out a yelp and he could hear them stumble on the flooring.

“Jesus Christ”

His ears pricked at the sound of an unfamiliar voice, soft and silky of the unknown female had him rushing towards the noise. Peeling open the screen door he was met with a woman.

She was radiant, her chiselled features and long y/h/c hair pushed over her shoulders. She was dressed in very short shorts and a crop top that left nothing to imagination, he could see her pebbled nipples through the material.

“Uh hi?” He says, his eyebrows arching at the females in front of him. She gives him a soft smile and puts out her hand. “Hey, I’m your neighbour Y/N” she smiles, her voice silvery and sweet.

“Oh, I’m JJ but I don’t live here. John B has just popped out” he advises, his eyes trained on the girls face. He noticed the soft freckled that littered her nose and her plump rosy lips that were layered in shiny lip-gloss.

“Well, you’ll do” she states, her body pushes past his and into the house. Turning his body to watch as the girl looks around the house, hands on her hips. “I’ve had a really shitty day and I could use someone to have sex with me”.

His eyes widen at her bold statement. Her body turning to face his. He can’t quiet think of words to say, his mouth agape as he stares at her.

“You want me to have sex with you?” He questions, his stomach muscles clenching when her feet start moving. Eyes trained on her toned legs until she stood directly in front of him, her perfume was intoxicating. Clean but floral, it invaded his nostril causing his mind to fog up.

“Yes, that’s exactly what I want. You down? Or should I wait for this John B, was it?” She pesters, he’s confused. Never had a women shown up and offered sex to him, he usually got laid at parties not by neighbours of his best friend.

“Oh no, I’ll do it” He insists, his voice going slightly higher when her fingers dragged down his oiled abs. Holding in his breath as her eyes stay trained on her fingers. “Wait, I’ve seen you before. Don’t you work at the wreck?” He questions, the only reason he suddenly remembers is because of her rings.

She had her fingers dressed in delicate gold bands, the one that stood out to him was a moon shaped ring placed on her thumb. His eyes lingered on her hands when she handed the group their food, never actually paying attention to her face. “I remember you rings”.

“That’s a weird thing to remember” she chuckles, her fingers grasp at the empty belt loops of his pants and tugs on him slightly. “Yeah, just a little, but they are nice” he says, his hands wrapping around her wrist.

“Do you do this often?” He questions, wincing when he realizes how it sounds. Obviously, he was curious, he wasn’t judging her for wanting have sex with a stranger. He had done it plenty of times before.

“Actually no” she says, her Bambi like eyes staring up at him. She licks her lips and giggles. “I saw you outside earlier, you looked good and I thought I’d shoot my shot” she reveals, the apples of her cheeks turning rosy pink under his stare.

“So, you weren’t having a shitty day? I just looked good?” He teases, his fingers walking up the length of her arms until they gripped the back of her neck. Squeezing slightly as she physically melted under his touch.

“Oh no my days been shit, but I’ve been thinking about having a man fuck mine brains out. You look like you could do it” she laughs, the sound of her laugh has goose bumps rising on his skin and he finds himself moving forward.

Lips pressing together, his hold on her neck tight as he pulls her close to his body. Her long nails scratching down his abs, his stomach muscles tightening each time her tongue runs against his.

Pulling away from her lips he nods over to the couch. “You know I don’t think that couch has seen much action in a while, we could start there?”.

He watches as she gulps and moves towards the couch. The tight gym shorts she had on were being pulled down her legs, her nude thong exposing her ass. JJ found himself reaching over to grasp it, a new found confidence he had found in himself.

“Be rough with me, show me how good you can fuck” she purrs, her hands reach for the edge of crop top and pulls It over her head. Breasts spilling out of the material, his eyes trained on the harden nub.

His mouth watered at the sight of them, they were perky and a handful. Just the right amount for him, she steps closer to him and grasped his hands that were fisted at his side. Her fingers massaging at the fists until they loosened, bringing them to her breasts. “Don’t hold back”.

And so, he didn’t, he gripped the back of her neck and pulled her towards him. Lips pressed together softly until he deepened them, tongues together, swirling and mixing them until you couldn’t tell themselves from the other.

His fingers pulling softly at her hair while she got to work unbuttoning his shorts, he’d never kissed this long before. Usually, he was hooking up with girls at parties and they just wanted him to get right to it. He was enjoying the feeling of her lips on his, even if she was a stranger.

She pulls away from his lips. “Can I take these off?” She questions, looking down at where her hands grasped the material of his shorts. He nods his head and she begins pulling them down. She’s falling to her knees in front of him and he can’t stop the audible groan that leaves his lips.

He can see the smirk on her lips but chooses not to comment, her hands drag down the last piece of clothing that shielded him from her view. She is now the one letting out a noise, her lips parted as she stares at his dick.

“Okay, yep I knew I was right” she whispers, her eyes looking up at him through her lashes. He nods at her as though to say she can touch, her hand reaching out to grasp him between her fingers. He bites down on his lips to stop the involuntary moans from echoing in the room.

Her tongue comes out to lick up his shaft, his hand gripping onto her hair and head rolling back to stare at the ceiling. Her mouth took him in until his tip hit the back of her throat, she gagged around him softly causing him to buck his hips involuntarily at the feeling. “Shit sorry” He groans, her hands grip at his thighs to stop him from stepping back, instead she looks up through her lashes as she continues to suck.

“Come here, my turn” He demands, pulling himself out of her before he could finish. His cock throbbing as she let him go. Her gripped her biceps and picked her up, throwing her onto the couch. Her back pressed against the back of the couch, her spread her legs and placed her feet onto the edge of the couch. Her dropping core exposed for him to see, her cheeks flushed when she noticed him staring. “Can I?” he pleads, she responds by nodding her head.

JJ brought his lips to her chest, moving his lips to explore her body. Kissin her breasts and caressing her thighs. Pleasure ripples through her body when his tongue envelopes her nipple between his mouth. Moving down towards her stomach and onto her thighs, giving her a slight squeeze before pressing an opened mouth kiss to her pussy.

She let out a moan at the feeling of his tongue circling her bundle of nerves, he sucked and licked her pussy like it was his last meal. Her fingers thread through his blonde hair and yanking when she could feel her orgasm bubbling in her stomach, he doesn’t move away from her though and instead pushes two fingers into her entrance.

He can feel her pulsing around his fingers as he fucks her, sucking on her clit while she cries out under him. Her body sweating as the orgasm hits her hard, she soaks his fingers in the process. Her moans fill the living room of the chateau. His tongue ached as he lapped up her juices.

“Holy shit” she gasps, pulling at his hair to bring him up on top of her. His lips glisten with her arousal, her tongue coming out to lick her lips before enveloping his mouth into a heavy kiss. She manages to move them around so she is straddling him, her hips grinding into his hard dick. “This feels so good” she moans, her hips making contact with his. He grips her tightly watching as she got herself on humping him.

“Fuck me please” she begs, she reaches into the small pocket in her pants and pulls out a condom, he stifles a laugh that she came prepared. She quickly rips the foil and brings it over his dick, gripping it between her fingers and lines him up with her entrance. With one rough thrust he enters her, filling her up until she lets out a loud gasp. His hands roam her body as she brings her hips up and down on him, her clit rubbing against his abs each time she came down.

Her head thrown back and one hand pressed onto his thigh as she arches her body on top of him, his eyes are trained on her breasts as they bounce with each movement. Their moans and gasps fill the empty room, bodies sweating as she rides him. He can feel her pulsing around him as she nears her second orgasm, her hair is sticking to her forehead while the loose curls sway behind her with each thrust.

“Yes” She moans as her orgasm ripples through her body, her nails digging into his thigh while the other squeezed his shoulder for leverage.

“Oh, God, yes” JJ echoes as he reached his own, fast and rough thrusts up into her pussy as he came into the condom. His chest rising and falling harshly as he stares at the girl on top of him. Her eyes closed and a soft smile on her lips.

She lets out a breathy laugh and pulls off him, reaching for her clothes. “Can I use the bathroom?” She asks, he nods pointing to the door just a few steps away. She disappears behind closed doors; he gathers up his pants and throws the condom away. Pulling his clothes back on he leans against the kitchen counter, eyes on the door of the bathroom.

She walks out looking fresh, like she hadn’t just been railed on the couch. Her cheeks still pink and lips swollen from the many kisses they shared. Her head turns towards him and she gives him a smile. “You're a good fuck” She laughs, her boldness has him growing in his pants all over again. “So are you” He states, just as he’s about to offer her a drink he can hear the voices of his friends outside.

“Who’s this?” John B questions as he steps through the threshold of his home. Eyes trained on the random girl standing with JJ in the kitchen, she bites down on her bottom lip to hold back her smirk. “Hey, I am Y/N. I live next door” She offers, John B and Pope greet her politely while also sending JJ a confused look.

“She works at the wreck, Kie would know her. She’s cool” JJ announces, his eyes trained on the girl he had just fucked on the couch that the guys had sat down. Her fist coming up to hide her laugh, she quickly looks away and makes eye contact with JJ.

“Let’s do this again sometime” She whispers, before he can say anything she is already walking out of the door sending everyone a wave and disappearing behind the closed door.

“You fucked her didn’t you” John B states, all JJ can do is let out a howl of laughter and turn around to make himself a glass of water. Hell yeah, he fucked her, and he would do it again at the drop of a hat he thought.

Taglist- @maybankforlife @lilklr69 @livinfullpogue @typic4lpisces @drewsgfduh

[muffindaddystyles]

DENTIST THE BAD BOI

Word count: 7k

A/N: Heavily inspired from 90's rom-coms, so if your heart swoons out of loneliness it's not on me sistas -- doctor Harry my fav.

Summary: Harry's a med-student and Y/N's an art student, being neighbours with Y/N was already a living hell for Harry but when she fusses over his cat getting her cat pregnant -- he mighty looses it.

Pairing: Dentist Harry × Artist reader, Frenemies to bestfriends to lovers, platonic affection and loads of bestie fluff.

MASTERLIST, REQUEST FOR BLURBS FROM THIS FIC ARE OPEN || PART 2

“Harryyyyy!!!!” Y/N screamed at the top of her lungs staring at the small picture of ultrasound, blinking at it several times to vision herself back into reality because the more she does the more she becomes grumpy and fussy – cursing the beast of a neighbour who got her little innocent cat pregnant.

She pulled the strings of her pyjama shorts to tighten it around her and hastily towed her feet into fuzzy slippers, giving a stink of an eye to her cat “don't act so surprised you little ragamuffin!” She mouthed at her with venom (as if trippers her cat cares), stomping her way out and writes a whole book of judgements in her rattling brain upon hearing the loud music weeping through walls.

She knocks. Huffs when it goes unnoticed and this time pounds at the door, crossing her forearms infront of her chest. Not unaware and very accustomed; of happy chatter whirling around whenever she’s trying to focus how a certain recipe goes by, his mates chanting his name from outside when he’s too occupied in whatever he's sorting out inside for their arrival, clanking of beer bottles knowing they and her have a long time to go, the music dimming in the wee of night as the door closes after every fifteen minutes and it dawns at that time –-- she always get left with one option and that’s to curse him till she sleeps.

It’s every Friday and Saturday’s story.

“Max stop that before Ni asks fo’ a dummy —-,” His neck's craned to where his friends are sitting on one of the cosy spots. His jaw popping, dimples chasmic from the smirk he’s holding and Y/N gulps then arches her brow when his attention drops down at her, “Oh .... hi, could help ya?” His cocky grin irks her – bubbling a fire in her pit and an urge to twinge his ear and drag him to her apartment, to show him what he did.

“Could you help me!?” She laughs ironically, chases her frowning gaze from the ripped patches of his jeans towards where his curls are brushing his earlobes and it kind of makes her gasp which she traps in fortunately because – he’s always wearing a hoodie, beanie or his hair up in a little fountain like bun rushing through the lobby with his thick books and laptop clutched in his arms, “Yes please .. y’could help me by transferring expenses of your cat's babies every month to me —-...um could simply have them in your apartment too if the first deal’s too bad.” She shrugs. Taking a glimpse from his shoulder of his friends bunched over eachother and he toys with his bottom wet lip, brows stringing into confusion and his bicep flexes making her flutter her eyes away as he grips the knob of the door and closes it behind him.

“What d'ya mean?”

“You’re doing it on purpose right? ‘cos there’s no way —--” He cuts her groans with a snap and runs a palm down his face, “I seriously don’t know what you’re talkin' ‘bout, Y/N.” His lips tinned into a flat line, his posture now resembling her's and she slaps her forehead with the heel of her palm.

“Then you should keep tabs of your beasty minx of a cat who got my cat pregnant!” She exclaims disbelievingly to which his eyes turns saucer and he throws his sinewy arms in between them, mimics her expressions comically, “Is that my fault? Did I get your cat prego?” She blinks up at him rapidly --- he’s such a nerve puller.

“Yes it is! You didn’t get your cat desexed —-,” She stuffs her pointer against his chest and twist it with a grit, “Now he’ll have babies left and right – like a catwhore he is!!” She aerials her hands in different directions rapidly and he takes a step closer kissing his teeth together to seethe his words.

“He’s not a catwhore!”

“Kay then take the responsibility of what he did.” She mutters tapping her foot onto the carpeted floor and guppies at him like a fish when he bursts into taunting cackles, leaning to catch the door-frame before he mushes her under his weight. ”

“Ye -‐..- you’re —- you aren’t serious are ya?” His rosy eyelids snib tightly forming crinkles to where his temples meet his cheeks and she almost pouts, how much she doesn’t want to she could never cascade her expressions.

“Oh my — .... Bambi eyed wouldn’t I’ave had free him of his ball’s heaviness –-- if I’d ‘ave enough money down me pocket?” He scrunches his nose to take a breather from laughing hard.

“Don’t call me that!” She bites at him.

“You’re cute when you’re angry.” He smirks gingerly – drums his fingers against his folded bicep and presses his back to the wall tipping his chin high.

Her blush eager to creep up her neck embarrasses her further more and she hides the softness in her voice, muttering gruffly, “Shut up.” Then turns to walk back into her apartment and to slam the door at his face -- but -- his whistle for her halts her in tracks.

“Hey – Bambi, we could sign the custody of kitties if that what ye'want.”

..

Three weeks after. There was another knock on Harry’s door, Niall's head perks up and bangs against the bookshelf –- he was trying to keep the furry cat in his lap, for a good warmer but its more enamoured with the ‘clucks' of his daddy’s boots than the soft flesh of Niall’s thigh as Harry chucks his wallet in the back-pocket of his jeans (he was about to go outside and bring some food) and opens the door slightly to see through the trapping chain, “who’s it?”

“Harry ‘s me ....” The voice mousey and worried. Niall recognizes it in a hot-second, frowns and tries to gain snowy’s attention, “What did y'do again? Did ya get the pretty neighbour's cat prego twice, you fat farts.” He chuckles when snowy meows at him innocently and Harry's brows skews together into a scowl.

“Call him fat farts another time —- I dare you —--,” He howls. Throwing angry upset glares towards Niall – their bickering gets interrupted when Y/N slips her hand from the crack of door, pinches Harry’s knuckles and he squeaks, “Ow —- what the fuck!”

“Harry.” Her tone threatening.

Harry puffs out a huge sigh and reveals himself infront of her, he's not in mood to fight with her over their cats, or the parcel Harry forgot to give her which got delivered to him on accident like one of the thousand times (he never found anything freakish until now .. not that he goes through what’s inside, but the labels tell they’re mostly her art supplies), or why he’s been showering for an hour because she now isn’t left with any warm water —- because he just came back from UNI and is dust bones from having two exams in a row.

“Y/N —-,” His face reeks with exhaustion. His curls drowsy, escaping from his knit beanie and his eyes glazed with sea-foam. She kinda feels bad for disturbing him -- but – it’s an emergency and she doesn’t know where to go, except him.

His weary vision falls upon trippers tucked beneath Y/N’s arm, “Is she alright?” He scratches behind her ear and trippers gives out a pained yowl.

“No –-.. that’s why ‘m here. She’s spotting blood everywhere and –-- and I don’t have enough money ...,” She’s embarrassed to say least. Not meeting Harry’s eyes and he gazes her sincerely –- belly doing weirdly funny somersaults. He clears his throat, grogs out gathering all the information in his head from the anatomy of humans and animals he studied till now.

“It’s okay for spotting in pregnancies – but ‐-.. she looks very much in pain s' we shouldn’t risk it. I’ve a friend. She’s practicing vet -- we could take her there.” He offers. Rubbing the back of his neck and Y/N bobs her head vigorously, anything to save her trippers baby.

“Fine –-- yeah, Iemme just wear my shoes ... then we're good to go.” She mumbles. Harry hasn’t seen her demeanour flatter like this ever before, whenever she’s banging and barging through his flat it’s always taut and cold banter.

He has never seen her this defenceless.

He drops his gaze down at her feet and finds that she’s wearing cute pizza slices socksies.

..

“Is this a clinic, or weed doing zone for animals?” She didn’t try to be mean. It just happened as she takes in the wearbouts of garage, stuffed with drums and musical instruments, spray paint on walls. Harry seems unfazed though, he could be shabbier than her if he wants to –- much fouler that could make her cry.

“Told you. She’s practicing not a vet yet.” She doesn’t question him further. Grateful enough for his help. She might not admit but he isn’t that bad of guy as she once imagined him in her head.

Y/N stifles a snort when a girl with mullet shag, having a stud in her brow and the corner of her lip, attired in all black greets Harry with a hip-check, “Vas’up booger.” She grins and Harry grumbles ruffling her hair with his knuckles.

It leaves Y/N in awe. This’s what group of friends look like -- so fun and annoying, she wanted to have this since when she’s small. Sadly, it’s just her and trippers in her friend group.

“Hi there!” She waves to Y/N trying to battle Harry’s tickles away. Takes trippers from Y/N's arms and coos up at her, “hiyaa baby .. oh, she’s having lil buns inside her.” She laughs and Y/N already likes her so much. As if, she’s the main character of any vintage styled movie.

“Rori here.” She introduces herself as Harry strolls inside her kitchen to rummage through her fridge, “Y/N.” Y/N smiles –-- eyeing Harry who’s whistling and tearing the crate of orange juice open.

When Trippers purrs from a cramp, Rori snuggles her closer to herself – “Her spotting is nothing to worry about –-- maybe she’s ready to give birth. If not I’ll take her to my hospital.”

“So Harry said...” Y/N nods.

“Oohh.” Rori exclaims, wiggling her brows curiously at Harry who’s gulping down juice hungrily, “Booger got normal friends too? Thought, those were all white lies.” He almost chokes at it – downing it cautiously and blinks vividly.

“No. Just neighbours.” Yeah, there’s nothing friendly between them –-- but how it’d be like to befriend Harry. The thought makes Y/N feel snoozy and warm.

“I see.”

“Okay then! ‘m gonna keep Trippers with me for two days –-- figure out what I could do to help her and if she heals I’ll drop her by, how that sounds?”

“Sounds good!” Both, Harry and Y/N chimes together heating their cheeks up. Harry wavers his gaze away, sulking a pouty mouth and turns all stoic again.

He doesn’t want to like, Y/N. Nope. Not at all. In any case.

She’s his bedevilling, bothersome and galling neighbour who just screams at him too much for his likening.

..

“Would you like something to eat?” She asks him while walking back home and he shakes his head, so she nudges him in ribs, “oh c'mon let it be a thank you, grumpy pants.”

“’M not –-,” He was about to snap at her. Instead, he groped her wrist tightly and tugged her to his side –-- she squeals into his chest as a car passes by them swiftly, honking at them in anger.

Her hair wisps from the friction of Harry’s hoodie as she pushes herself away from him, surprisingly he smells incredibly sweet – that of vanilla and citrus musk, something very cosy and like a morning breeze.

A jolt buzzes through her spine at the fact she was about to get crushed under a vehicle but she grins up at him awkwardly, “Tofu then?” His peepers widen in shock and he slaps his forehead.

“You’re mad, know that.”

..

Harry and Y/N. Sky and earth . She sprouts buds of irises and peonies when she speaks, her touch that shines away even an intimidating person as if they're mimosa plants, those eyes --- those eyes are itself sepia of grounds on which the tiny creatures celebrates by and Harry's well ... he’s the floss of clouds hidden behind sunshine, his rains would turn her into loam and his uppish thunder would make her loathe him.

Then some gods decided to break the needles and fix it in some other clock that rotates anti-clock wise.

Now, when she’s unable to nourish her flowers he's always there to rain and stroke a tender breeze against her that makes her lush grass snuggle the roots of who she’s.

They were enemies once. Opposite to eachother in many ways but couldn’t live without eachother despite of their distances. Just like sky's a hollow sheet of nothingness without it’s dear earth.

..

What blossomed their friendship was Y/N's date with this cute boy that is in her ceramic class, (not a date if you’d ask so –-- more like a meetup at this coffee house near her UNI).

Turns out he isn’t that cute. His blunt hands wandered up Y/N’s thigh without her consent and before she could know that, he was groping at it –-- making her gasp and hit her knee against the table. She struggles to writhe out of the chair but he stitches his nails in her skin, “I’m not liking it – you better stop.” She hisses, palms sweaty and slipping trying to remove his grip from around her.

“Don’t act all stupid .. you were hitting at me for hours, you want it but wouldn’t admit.” He groans, rolling his eyes and she feels like crying –-- teeth clanking letting out a shuddering breath.

“I’ll scream.” She warns him.

“You’re not that innocent, you act like.” He smirks, sliding his hand down her insides and before he could reach further Y/N sneaked a fork from the table and stabbed it in his knuckles.

“Fuck.” He shrieks, “Bitch.” He almost screams but stops when everyone stares at him as Y/N’s chair fell against the floor and she stumbles inside the bathroom.

Locking it behind her. Her chest burns with tears. Her vision spins and her fingers shakes as she dials one number she could reach for anytime, it rings then goes to voicemail so her bitten lip wobbles and eyes turn glossy.

She again dials it. There’re noises behind, that of someone instructing and Harry was in his lecture hall when she called .. his heart drops because all he could hear is quivering breath ... it shudders to tight painful gasps and he’s collecting his stuff leaving his seat immediately the doctor who's teaching them Apiceoctomy stares Harry while speaking.

Once he’s out in hallway, “Hey? Y/n are y’there? You okay? What happened?” She bolt her eyes close pressing her head to cold tiled wall and yawps outta fear when someone pounds at the door. Harry runs towards the exist, “Y/N where are you!? ‘m coming .. whatever it’s just --.. just ...” He gripes at his curls pushing them back – his heart beating loud, “ – just stay where you’re ‘n don’t panic .. yeah? It’s okay.” He mutters. Voice soft and assuring.

Her breathing patterns back to calmness – something about him so consoling, so warm and she nods. After some minutes she’s telling him the address and gladly it’s not that far away from Harry.

When he reaches. There are several people waiting at the bathrooms door and he’s knocking on it lightly, pressing his ear to it and grabs the knob (in case he’d have to break it).

When there’s no-response from inside he gets it something’s peculiar, “Bambi. ‘s me Harry.” It clicks and unlocks and he’s tumbling inside while the others groans and disperses knowing it’s invain waiting.

He’s dishevelled. His curls in moppy condition and his eyes full of concern and worry –-- she feels awful for doing this to him.

“Were you crying? Did somethin' happen?” He frowns. Ducking a bit to meet her gaze level and she clears the clump in her throat, “Can we just leave .. please?” He couldn’t believe it’s her voice – the bubbliness and chirpiness of it died to frightened meekness.

Harry takes her hand and walks them outside, Y/N sucks in squeak when the same guy rushes to confront them and when Harry sees his injured hand -- everything pieces together and fury spikes through his veins.

His brows pinches together into a frown, his lips lifting into a scowl and his eyes darkens pitch coal like.

He grips her dainty fingers and moves her behind him protectively and his chest buffs out as he takes a step forward towering the guy – “What d'ya want?” He kisses his teeth together to grit vehemence and that guy lift his trembling hand infront of Harry.

“Look what this bitch —-,” Ah –-- he really pushed Harry’s bad button didn’t he?

Harry grabs him from collar and Y/N squeals rubbing his wrist to pull him back, no-use.

“Badmouth her or anyone —-" Harry sneers and if he'd be a cartoon character – fume would have been coming out of his ears and nose.

“Else what!?” Harry’s more of a practical person -- so he did what he's been learning for years now and breaks his nose with such force it almost knocks him out.

Y/N's still in shock. Walking behind him on jelly toes and a shiver spirals in her bone marrow when her sweat dries from the wind that’s blowing and hitting them in faces.

They wait at bus shelter, sitting side by side –-- thighs brushing now and then flustering Y/N, Moreso when he apologizes everytime.

There’s silence. Harry’s irritated groan breaks it –- he clenches and unclenches his knuckles .. the thin skin a bit bruised.

“Are you okay? I’m so sorry –-- .. ‘s my fault.” She rambles. Taking his hand to inspect it, “I shouldn’t have called you at ---..” He frowns confused and pokes her in knee conveying her to stop worrying. Because if anyone needs to be taken care of is her and wish he could just hug her and tell her that it’s not her fault – not even a tad.

“Y/n...” He gains her attention and his gaze flickers from her snotty nose towards her soaky cheeks, “Shut up.” She chuckles at that putting his palm gently back on his thigh.

“Would you like to have, noodles? I know this incredible chinese place ...” He shakes his head. His smile small and kooky, nose scrunched up as he sniffs the air – predicting a rain coming soon.

“D'we have to eat after every tragedy that happens t’you?”

“Yup, tragedies makes me hungry.” It’s her coping mechanism if she'll be honest and that’s what she’s been doing for ages.

“Who are you, Y/N?

She jumps up. Wiggling her fingers for him to take and beams sweetly, “Bambi next door?”

..

“From when did ya become s' rich?” He giggles. He finds her fucking adorable as she drags him along herself excitedly – she halts infront of the expensive restaurant –- where people dressed in all kind of luxuries and bright pearls are dinning in and she arches her brow sceptically, “Did you really think –- I’ll be able to take us here?” He shoves his hands in his jeans pocket, elevates his shoulders and smiles bashfully.

“Maybe one day, who knows?” They walk towards the chinese take out and Y/N trots backwards –-- facing him all while and rolls her eyes, “’M an artist whose half of paintings goes to trash.” Harry’s eyeballs springs out of his sockets hearing her statement and he really wants to knock some senses into this silly girl.

“Oh my --.. jeez .. those paintings are ‘s good y'divvy. They're hanging onto my walls, been enjoying them fo' free —- what the actual fuck .. really your hands are magical.” He feels annoyed and sad that she felt a need to dump them, because those were some beautiful art pieces.

(“Hmm. It has some hidden meaning beneath it, H. I’m tellin' ya.” Ni would always say. Standing infront of it for hours and hours staring at it.

“Looks like a pussy to me.” Max would quip sipping his bevy and Harry would smack him in head, “Guys how ‘bout we just see it like a fuckin' painting.” He'd grumble focusing back on his books.)

“Really?” She asks shyly and he bobs his head, “Guess you could just keep them then ...” She grins up at him taking the boxes from the cashier.

“Where are we going?”

“You’d see yourself.” She sing-songs galloping over the muddy potholes and Harry looks funny doing it with his spider long legs. Their footsteps echoes in the empty warehouse and Harry didn’t expect her to be the person – that loves finding weird places and spend time there.

“Careful there.” He murmurs. Pressing a hand to her waist when she wobbles on her feet climbing the metal stairs and Harry thinks if she was this clumsy all along or it’s from what happened at the coffee house.

“Holy shit!” He cups a hand around his mouth as the traffic bustles down on the street, “You afraid of heights?” She glances back at him from where she’s standing on the cemented edge.

“Matters. If we're about to act silly and jump, then yes.”

Warmth worms up at his chest and his adam apple bobs, he barks out a laugh when she giggles demanding him to come closer to her, “Come here then you dentist the bad boi.” He tugs the fabric of his jeans from his crotch and hikes his one knee up sitting beside her, other leg swinging in air.

He listens to her hums and happy sounds as she slurps the long noodle inside her mouth, “What you’re afraid of then Harry?” Her question catches him off-guard. Nobody has ever asked what his fears are and he might be famous for an intimidating personality just because he speaks less and owns a roaring bullet –-- he’s still very nice to talk to, but he'd rather spend his time with snowy than waste his time on orgy parties.

“Snowy’s funky farts -- they're ‘orrible!! have to leave the flat fo’ a minute.” He grins when Y/N’s head lulls back and she laughs gleefully, rolling into his side to support herself, “Oh no!” She whines when her chopsticks falls and drops onto the road poorly.

“We can share mine.” He hands her his chopsticks and she thanks him timidly, “What d'you fear?” They pass it back and forth –- his lips wrapping around them as he takes a chunky bite.

Harry tries to down the food that got stuck in his throat when she said nonchalantly, “Dying alone I guess?” He chews the veggies, grimaces and shakes his head -- puts his hand over her knee squeezing it kind-heartedly.

“You’ll not.” She feels like every tulip of light around her’s sparkling – the buzz of having his company tingling her in good way, “Promise?” She asks and Harry lifts his pinky in between them encouraging her to bring her's.

She wasn’t serious about the promise thing it was more onto sarcastic side than to sincerity.

“Promise.” His dimples caters deep and his eyes crinkles when different golden lights dances against her skin making her look prettier than she’s.

He’s gonna fulfill his promise.

..

Y/N could be sentimental given on occasions and how bad the situation’s – but she bottles it up for good amount until later, it all crushes her completely and she’s unable to stand back.

Now, when there’s eerie quietness in the bus and the world infront of her fades behind in weird shapes and forms in her head because of the speed of vehicle – her mind thought it’d be best time to remorse over what happened to her and her eyes well up at that.

Harry plucks his headphones down upon hearing her soft sniffles and turns her towards him with her shoulder, “Y/N hey ....” His voice tender and dewy as he slides his palm under her jaw and cups her cheek to wipe out her tears with the mild stroke of his thumb.

His gentleness rakes out an agonising sob from inside her and she feels like her organs are clashing together.

“Shh. Bambi you’re okay now, ‘s alright you’re here with me -- shh, ‘m so sorry love —- but it’s over now, yeah? We're going home and I’ll make you chamomile tea, could ‘ve both snowy and trippers cuddle with you while I’ll get you all warm and nice inside this new fluffy blanket I just bought! – how does that sound?” He pets her hair. Brings her closer to his chest and she keeps her nose tucked against his clavicles to stop from crying and make a show.

When she nods, suckling a wet breath he swipes a loose errand of her hair behind, “Sounds good yeah?” She just hums snuggling into him.

Her arms slowly loops around his love-handles and he stows her head under his chin -- rubs her back in circles to soothe the stiff muscles, covers her ears with the headphones he was wearing before – plays acoustic version of Landslide by Fleetwood Mac and simpers when she hiccups his name, but doesn’t respond when he answers – his ears turns pink from fond and his belly overglows with butterflies as she babbles his name till she drops into peaceful sleep.

Y/N found herself in his bed with snowy and trippers ontop of her and Harry snoring on the couch – his gangly limbs not fitting at all.

She really wanted to call him and sleep on his bed, but she drowses back to slumber.

..

“Grumpy jerk and an actual ray of sunshine. Sorry, couldn’t process it – too much.” Rori teased Harry the last time they gathered and Y/N was there too! though the true statement was claimed after her departure.

Harry’s friends couldn’t believe that he stepped out of his comfort zone and made a new cute friend, now after one year of their friendship it doesn’t feel like they’re neighbours anymore –-- it's just one big home with an alleyway in between.

“What're y'doin', moppet?” Harry chuckles picking up the half eaten packet of crisps, chewy sour candies, wrappers of oreos and the romcom CDs they were playing before.

Y/N's sprawled on her tummy. Feetsie in air and her chin secured in her palm as she looks like she’s seriously about to take an admission in med school –-- she’s concentrating real hard on the thick book under her, eyes fixated on the diagrams of teeth – it makes Harry laugh like a maniac.

“Aish. Your books, gives me an ache.” She massages her forehead, shakes her head as if she tasted something icky and pushes his book away. Harry laughs harder at her antics wrappers flying away from his grasp and he flops onto couch –-- thighs spreading wide and back sinking into the cushions.

“Where?” His lips rumbles as he tries to hold back another fits of laughter when she gets his dirty joke and pouts, lips fluttering into a smile until she bursts into giggles joining him.

“Nope. My cookie doesn’t throb like it used to sneaking on reproduction chapters in biology.” Harry roars out a cackle at that and Y/N grins fiddling with the frizz of her socks, “Heyyyy it’s not funny –- very much sad.”

He suckles a breath in, their grins achy and big, “Stuff your cookie with some jam ‘n you'll be alright.”

“You’re gross!” She fake gags. Hunches over to exaggerate the severity and scares the shit out of Harry when she gasps loudly slapping his knee, “Harry! Harry! Oh my gosh.....ahhhh!” She gallops like a bunny towards the window and gazes up at the sky with glinting eyes, “Harry look! It’s snowing.” He trots behind her with a roll of eyes knowing what’s about to come next.

When she turns around with sparkly grin, hands clasped atop her chest and tippy-toes to beg him, Harry shuts his lids, “No Muffy.” Y/N loves eating chocolate muffins –-- eating them whenever she could possibly ... and that’s how the pet name Harry decided to call her was muffy.

“Please, it would be so fun .. we could have hot chocolate afterwards.” She mumbles tugging at the hem of his chunky yarn sweater.

“Nothing’s fun about snow angles, Muffyyyy!!” He whines. Squinting down at her with one eye and finds her all slumpy, head falling downwards.

“Okie then. ‘m going to sleep.” She mutters in a meek voice pushing past him –-- but he wraps his hand around her wrist and pulls her back to himself, chuckling with wide eyes, “You’re very dramatic and annoyin’ y’know that?”

Instead, she grins bobbing her head shamelessly, pats his chest and dashes to wear his warm jacket, “Biscuits on you -- hot chocolate on me.” She tells him slipping into her shoes with the support of doorframe.

He comes closer to her and her heart thuds into her tiny ribs as he zips his jacket she’s wearing up till her neck and warns her while pulling out her hair, “If I get sick – ‘m gettin'y sick too.”

..

Harry’s waiting outside the candy shop Y/N just barged in moments ago. He refused to step inside – knowing she’ll use him as a taste tester and at the end of the day his tongue would have a mountain sugar atop his taste buds.

The spring breeze flowery and warm. He shakes his head, smiles softly watching her switch aisles and guffaws loudly catching attention of an old couple siting on the bench behind -- at her eagerness when she started chomping onto the long chewy candy right after getting it from the cashier.

“That’s g'na rot your teeth even before your forties.” He tells her taking the small bag from her and walks beside her, “Your kids are gonna hate you ...” She tells him –- stretching out the candy with her teeth.

“You sure, y'were allowed colas and candies in childhood?” He teases her prodding her side so she throws it at his chest making him laugh and he bends down to pick it up and dump it in bin.

“You’ve got a cute bum.” She whistles and Harry’s cheeks bashes with blush – turns around and wiggles herself, “How's mine?” She hums glancing back at him with cheeky grin.

“Ten by two, I guess?” He bites down a smirk when she spins to face him a bit gobsmacked, “Not even five?” She grumps chin doubling as she tries to see her bum herself.

“Six then?” He giggles enjoying how she’s getting riled up out of nowhere and she stomps away from him so he jogs to catch her, “Bambi. Was kiddin'.”

“You owe me two muffins with the amount of insults you’ve caused my poor bum.” He knuckles at her hair and she slaps him away like a feisty kitten, “I take it back –-- you’re really ten by two.”

“Oi!!!” Now, she’s running behind him. His curls blowing away and his coat ruffling with the zephyr, his head falling back with the belly-ache laughter that bounces against the bricked walls of shops.

..

It’s Friday night. Y/N is doing her laundry. Plucking out Harry’s socks from Trippers furry ear, her kitties sleeping in bassinet. Harry and Y/N have named them Tum, Tug and Truggers –-- she sits back on her heels upon hearing her door closing and hikes the small basket on her hip trudging outside —-- she didn’t had any clothes that could make her feel warm during these days – even her socks were all soggy -- so was Harry’s, now all she’s gonna do is make a blanket fort and hide in it for hours.

She knuckles at her eyes, blinking the tiredness away to see properly who’s standing in the middle of room, “Harry?” He's wearing a graduation gown and tips his hat with a sheepish smile then waves his degree infront of her, “Guess who's a proper dentist now!?” She’s frozen to her spot –- jaw slacked and eyes blown away in surprise.

“Your bad boi!” The basket falls from her hip onto the floor scaring Trippers and she whispers an, “Oh my goodness.” Before, stumbling towards him and crashes in his arms giving him a tight loving hug. He slinks his forearms around her and squishes his face into the crook of her neck, lips tickling her skin and if it was possible for him to freeze the time and cherish it for some more he'd.

“I’m so proud of you.” She mumbles into him with a grin. He feels so worthy and every hardship he faced now feels like nothing, this's how life supposed be throughout –- but best things always bores fruit for the right time.

“How about we celebrate? Just you and me.” Just you and me. It feels nice to just her and him. Makes her heart swoon. Makes her feel like skies outside are wet and pink, “Umm .. can we celebrate here? It’s okay .... “ She shifts on her feet and he furrows his brows in confusion, lips ticked up as if he’s scrutinizing her.

“You and not goin' nutters for an outing .. seems odd —-,” Then his eyes falls over the surrounding, a heating pad beside his feet – aloe fused socks hanging to get dry, a tray of chocolate muffins, kettle on the coffee table so he puts one and one together himself.

“Oh muffy —-... pizza and cuddles then?” If he wouldn’t be aware of how first few days of her period are hell for her then who would? He’s always making her pot meals and curry rice – feeds her and gets all strict when she refuses to eat anything. She looses her appetite and transforms into something ‘if zombie had a baby with vampire -- it sure looked like you’ he'd always scold her.

Even bribe her with candies. Once they were awfully painful and Y/N really didn’t want to be all dramatic not when their friends were having a good time, she doesn’t like to be a party pooper.

But, when a stinging cramp cut through her pelvis and thighs she was hunching forward with a jolt -- all teary eyes and wobbly lips. Harry left everything and rushed towards her, sitting on his knees on the floor and cupped her throat to make her look at him when she refused to, “Y/N ‘m serious -- you rather tell me what’s happening with ye’ or ‘m throwin' you at my shoulder and takin’ you hospital —... cause fuck look at you been like this since morning ....” He was rambling and Y/N felt like drilling a hole into floor and hide herself there forever.

She was mortified and embarrassed, a terrible combination.

She wasn’t able to tell him infront of all of their friends even though it’s something very normal, so everyone stared and nodded when they left they for Harry’s room.

“Bambi are you okay? I’m not even kidding something’s not —-..” She wipes her nose and tugs at his wrist trying to shush him, when he doesn’t pushes a fingers against his lips.

“Don’t worry. ‘m good --- just —-... umm I’m on my periods.” She rubs her one feet on another and his mouth fall into an ‘o' when realization hit him and his brows clinches together sternly.

He sighs running his fingers through his hair, something he does when frustrated and whumpy.

“Should’ve told me. We could have done this later ... do you want anything? I’ve got pain —--,” His words swells on his tongue when her head bumps against his chest and her hands locks around his neck, hugging him with all her gentle will because nobody has ever cared for her –-- him being so tentative to her makes her want to sob into his chest.

He warms her in all the right places.

..

“How’re you feeling on scale of one to ten?” He speaks while chewing onto the stuffed crust of pizza. They’re cosied up on the sofa while Mama Mia plays on the telly and she’s cuddled up into him, he's holding her heat pad with the grip of his forearm and she lifts her head mousey-ly from his bicep and whispers – “Eightish...? Now, you’re Dr.Styles.” He giggles at her and pushes her head back against him with his finger.

“What does my being dentist has a connection to your periods?” He dips the pads of his fingers into her pudgy love handles and squeezes them -- she giggles thinking about the joke she’s about to crack.

“You pull teeth, it’s blood and I pull out tampon so it’s —...” Harry chuckles gruntly at her and tickles her more, “Oh no. I know where it’s goin'....”

“You asked for it!” She pouts at him and he squishes her lips together as if she’s a duck toy.

Then they flump back into their cuddling position and Harry rubs her tummy in tender soothing circles, it helps her relax and his breath syncs with her and she really tries not to pay attention to her bratty screaming hormones heating her skin up – her thighs experiencing a quiver and she squeaks down a huffy whimper.

“You okay?” Harry asks. When she squirms against him and she gulps -- they don’t hide stuff from eachother so she tells him honestly, “You’re really turning me on.” Harry’s heart hiccups at that and his palms still over her thighs.

“Is that so?”

He pets her hair and tries to make her stand, “Just go to washroom and jizz one out.”

“I can’t.”

“You can’t? Why?”

“Promise me you wouldn’t make fun....” He frowns and nods bringing his pinky to make the deal.

She clutches her sweater down to her knees, cheeks rosy and mutters out in one breath – “I’ve specific days for that....” Harry really tires to. He locks up his laughs in his lungs and it aches his chest, his cheeks balloons up but at last he rolls onto floor and guffaws into his elbow.

“You said you wouldn’t make fun!!!” She whines kicking his side lightly and he grabs her ankle, “This means all those times you’d be all locked up –- oh my god, you were playing with yourself.” She folds her arms. Her nostrils flares with irritation and she doesn’t even spare him a glance.

“Pet, waiting so long .. it’s a torture to yourself.” He tells her genuinely sitting up with crossed legs and she mumbles knuckling at her eyes, “just some reasons ... horny is bad.” Now, Harry feels kind of terrible pushy person and he really wants to help her out but he’s walking on egg shells here. So, he stops asking anything.

“Rori's girlfriend is a sex therapist —-“ She becomes all fidgety at that and Harry takes in her nervousness, “It’s totally fine if you don’t want to.” He exclaims waving his hands and she gulps giving him a small nod.

“Night time fo' some grumpy muffy!” He coos, brings the blanket to her chin and his pupils dilate adorningly when she asks him, “Could I snuggle you?”

“Ofcourse.” He pecks her temple and tells her to budge over before sandwiching her between him and the sofa.

That whole night all his mind could think was why horny is bad for her?

..

Y/N was feeling overly warm and heated, a tad achy between her thighs. She vigorously tries to focus on something else but her chest is heaving at this point, even opens the windows and let the cool air hit her but no use –- so she does what have to be done in order to get rid of the throb.

She cosies herself on the bed, switches onto hentai and throws her legs in air to shimmy her sheer white panty down.

“Oh ...” Whimpers teeny-ly when her fingers brushing up her soaking pussyfolds provides her a bit relief – her soft hands wanders beneath her flimsy shirt and touches her skin in the most arousing way possible –-- tweaks her nipples and jerks up, oozing more wetness.

“Ah! Fuck.” She moans easing in two fingers at once and cramps down at them watching the hentai porn –- but it’s not enough, she’s been pushing her fingers in and out for ten minutes now—she’s unable to get to climax.

So she groans sits up and switches to domineering audios, listens to it while fingering herself hard and she has no idea from where her mind gathered these images from -- but -- soon she’s thinking about Harry’s husky rasp, his sea-foam beautiful eyes and those rosy knuckles ring clad hands —-- imagining him holding her down into mattress and pounding into her at a brutal pace, making her sit on his cock and not letting her move –-- his fingers down her petty throat —-- him spanking her ass if she let’s out any voice out and he'd roar at her beg as she'd be lurking at her tenth orgasm –---- every plausible dirty stuff with him.

She was so engulfed into making herself feel good, lost in her own headspace and imaginations that she didn’t hear footsteps approaching and it’s like she manifested him as he stands at the door-frame with blown away pupils –-- guppy mouth and she’s squealing feeling dizzy upon sitting up this quick.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck —-... sorry sorry ... “ He covers his eyes and turns to walk away but bumps his head with a thud into doorframe.

She gasps, knees up and almost shouts, “No!” making him halt mid-track and she’s on the verge of tears, red face and shaky fingers.

“Please ....”

“Stay.”

Harry’s eyes turns soft at that and he walks towards bed, licks his lips wet and brushes the loose tress of her hair away.

“You want me to stay, muffy?” He asks to make sure – she isn’t in haze and all fog minded.

“Yes. I want you to stay.” She doesn’t hesitate this time. Her words honest and full of plead, she needs him, she wants him, she wants to have him.

[embrassemoi]

Surrounded by the Moon and Stars ✷ 29

Pairings: Sirius B, F!Reader, Remus L Warnings: Language, angst, insecurities, blood, darkish thoughts (self-hatred), fighting, violence Author's Note: heavy chap. if you’re having a bad day, take a moment, be kind to yourself and put off reading this until you feel better 💜

【 Masterlist | Previous Chapter | Playlist 】

Chapter 29: That Pet You Just Couldn't Keep

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Remus woke up to a bright, white light. He squinted, head lolling to the side of his lumpy pillow. The chair near his bedside was empty, saved from a pitcher of water along with a few potions Madam Pomfrey must’ve left for him, were placed on the stand beside his bed.

Something wasn’t right. Peter or one of the other Marauders were always there waiting for him after his transformations.

Too hot for a blanket in June, he ripped off his covers and noticed the bumpy, large material hiding beneath his nightgown. He licked his lips, letting air whistle down his dry throat while a sharp, burning sensation flooded his abdomen. Remus winched, groaning out while stretching to drink the potions and water. Although, as he brought the glass vials to his lips, he noticed that his arm was littered with scratches and bruises. Curious, he lifted the slit of the gown to see a large wrapping across his lower stomach and bruises in the shape of lopsided circles and rectangles travelling across his body.

Remus felt his face scrunch. Ever since the Marauders had become animaguses, he hardly sustained any injuries aside from the occasional limp or flimsy scratch. There was usually an absence of pain nowadays, not an overload of it.

What caught his attention was the scent of human blood. His senses were always heightened the week leading up to the full moon and the week following, so it was particularly strong. It caused his head to spin like planets performing a celestial dance.

Preoccupied with the scent, Remus didn’t notice someone slipping into the room.

“Hey, how are you feeling?” A fuzzy Peter came into view. He went to sit on the edge of his bed sporting a nervous look.

“Was wondering where you were.” Remus relaxed at his appearance.

“Yeah… Erm — been busy.”

Soon enough, another sharp pain stabbed at his abdomen again. “Fuck — what happened last night?”

Wormtail sucked in sharply as he wiggled in his seat uncomfortably. “I… something terrible happened. Bollocks, Moons — I’m sorry...”

Remus felt his spine prickle with needles. “What?”

“We should wait until Dumbledore or James comes back.”

“Dumbledore?!”

Ghostly pale, Peter was on the verge of fainting. Remus took another deep inhale. This time, he smelt blood, but it was coming off of Peter and a few other foreign scents lingered on him. Was that… Y/N? And… Snape? Remus scanned Peter, noticing the droplet of red on his shoes.

“Pete,” his voice dropped to an icy whisper, “Whose blood is that?”

He remained quiet.

Remus moved to prop himself up on the bed. “What happened?”

As Peter spoke, every word made Remus recline into himself and he was left unsure of how to feel. The overload of information put him into a state of complete shock. His vision faded in and out, suddenly feeling very cold and dizzy compared to the hot weather.

He distantly heard Peter trying to gain his attention but stared blankly at the metal bed frame.

“Say something,” his friend tried, sounding desperate. He didn’t even know how long he’d been quiet for.

Remus worked through the betrayal in nine steps. It helped make sense of his emotions. To categorize them — making it easier to file away.

1. Shock & denial

“No,” he said, barely moving a muscle in his face. “That's impossible! Padfoot would never…”

Peter watched him pitifully. Remus’ eyes blinked rapidly, heart pounding. “I’m sorry.”

2. Process what happened (or try to)

“He… told… Snape?” He asked despite Peter repeating the story multiple times.

“Sirius was mad at Sniv — Snape, and he was provoked by —”

“I didn’t hurt him, did I? I didn’t hurt anyone?”

“He’s fine.”

“Then why won’t you tell me what happened to me? Why was I bleeding?”

He refused to look him in the eyes and Remus felt terror ebb it's way through his skin. “Answer me!”

“As I said, L/N and Snape got into a row… she heard Sirius tell him and she went to save him…”

“Don’t you dare lie to me.”

Wormtail took a deep breath. “You… nicked her a bit and James’ antler broke off in you because… he was trying to get you off of her…”

Remus was rooted in place. What Peter just said was unreal. His stomach twisted painfully. He blinked. “Y/N’s hurt? I hurt her?”

“Yes — no! That was Snape —” “Is she here? Did I bite her?”

“You didn’t and yeah but —” “Move out of my way.” He pushed himself up wobbly.

“You lot a lot of blood, sit —”

“Get out of my way!” He threatened. Remus pushed Peter to the side, clambered to his feet. Remus gripped the bed tightly and felt a few seams rip open and blood began to faintly seep through his white bandages.

He staggered around, ripping back the curtains until he saw Y/N. Limping up to her bed, Remus almost burst into tears when he saw her. She looked so tiny, curled up and engulfed in blankets and pillows. Her ankle was propped up, head bandage and skin dull.

It felt like Peter had poured a bucket of freezing cold water on him.

He hurt her. Almost got her and Snape killed or infected. Could have hurt Prongs and Wormtail…

He was a fucking monster.

He should be put down.

From how loud he was, running around the wing, Y/N’s eyes fluttered open. She attempted to stretch, groaning out in pain. But then, her eyes flickered up to him and she froze. Her hand shot up protectively to her chest and face as instinctively went for her wand but stopped. Genuine fear flashed through her, making Remus instantly want to cry. It felt like an eternity passed as she gripped her sheets and opened her mouth.

She was going to scream — to take him away — call him a monster — to cry or yell for Madam Pomfrey or —

But Y/N’s body relaxed. A tried smile twisted and gaze dissipated with fear, replaced with nothing but understanding and softness; she even went as far to touch his hand but Remus wrenched it back.

“Ta-da!” She croaked. “I lived.”

Remus didn’t smile, only staring horrified.

“Yeah, that was a hit or miss...” Peter interjected. He stood behind him, ensuring that if he fell, he’d be there to catch Remus. He continued to stare like she grew another set of eyes.

“What?” Her grin deflated. “Am I that irresistible?”

That pulled a breathy laugh from Remus as he shook his head. Why wasn’t she disgusted with him?

“Thank Merlin, you’re both awake.” All their heads turned to James’s floating head before he pulled off the invisibility cloak.

James moved to pull Remus into a large hug, whispering an ‘I’m sorry’ into his ear. He held him for a while before breaking off, going to embrace Y/N who wheezed.

“Ouch.”

“My bad, my bad!” He pulled back and slipped into bed with her. Peter forced Remus to sit on the edge of her bed while he stood.

A million thoughts ran through his head. He wanted to get away, to run — not even be in the same room as her. Remus wanted to think, to make any sense of what happened.

What the fuck happened? He couldn’t even process it.

She remembered everything, right? Surely she wouldn’t be this calm had she.

“Oh, wait — Lupin, are you alright? I swear a deer came at you last night.”

James chuckled out loud, breaking Remus out of his thoughts as he looked at him and Peter. “I guess there’s no point for secrets anymore.”

Y/N looked at them questioningly, her eyes squinting from the bright light before Peter went to close the blinds shut. James got off the bed, smiling widely at Remus and Peter got onto the bed instead.

“Ugh — Pete? James? What —”

A loud gasp ripped from her mouth as she jerked away from James who turned into a very large stag and Peter into a fat brown rat.

Remus could almost cry at how comical her face looked.

James was so large that he had to take a few steps back to prevent his antlers from poking one of their eyes out and Remus noticed that one was gone.

He felt sick again. A hand drifted to his stomach.

“Holy shit! Oh my god!” Y/N went to graze a finger on Peter’s fur before turning to James with shaky hands to touch one of his antlers and patting him on the head. She was speechless as her mouth open several times before forcing out, “You're really Bambi!”

James turned back, taking his glasses off to clean. “I wanted to be a lion — for Gryffindor, y’know.”

“You can’t choose, I wouldn’t be a rat.” Peter grimaced.

“They’re highly intelligent. Nothing to worry about.” James reassured and ruffled his hair.

“When did you guys learn to do this?”

“We’ve been at it for three years now. We finally were able to do it in August before school started.”

She shook her head, staring in awe.

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Dumbledore came to speak to everyone later that day.

Remus had been dreading it once he came into the wing and began speaking to Y/N, a buzzing sound filling his ear. All Remus was left to do was twiddle his thumbs, waiting and completely disoriented.

When he finally approached him, Dumbledore lost his usual twinkle in his eyes. He made sure to close the long vertical blinds and again, the room filled with a low buzzing sound.

“How are you doing?” He asked. Remus, had he been in the right mindset, would have prevented the scoff escaping him. Dumbledore didn’t react but continued. “Miss L/N is recovering well and Mr. Snape didn’t receive any injuries. Just a fright.”

Remus nodded, that was good, but he remained quiet.

“Snape’s been persuaded to act accordingly for the best interest of his fellow pupils and L/N gave her word.”

Remus choked back a laugh. Snape was going to, no matter what, let his secret slip somehow.

“You’re also exempt from the Transfiguration exams, both you and Miss L/N. You’ve both sustained a degree of varying head injuries and you’ll be graded on a cumulative from McGonagall.”

Dumbledore was forcing Remus to the edge as he bit down on his inner cheek. It was useless to listen to him. “Are you expelling me?”

“No. You should not bear any blame.”

“Dumbledore, no offence, but are you mental?” Remus sputtered adding, “I endangered four students last night.”

“Yes but —” “The next time we won’t be so lucky. I’m a monster, sir. I should be.”

The headmaster sighed. “Remus, give yourself a bit of credit. Think highly of yourself.”

Remus gave a dry laugh, almost baffled at how Dumbledore was acting. Did he just gloss over the fact he could have gotten students infected? He wouldn’t be able to live with himself had he. “How can I?”

“Well Y/N seemed to think very highly of you. She made you a very compelling case along with your friends, Potter, Pettigrew and Black.”

“Black’s not my friend,” Remus countered. He didn’t care about how rude he was being.

“Remus —”

“Is he expelled?”

“No.” The answer had Remus wheeling, anger spiking. “He’s not.”

“Why not? If it isn’t my fault, that I’m not to blame then why isn’t he? He told them how to find me.”

“I understand that this is a very difficult situation and rest assured, Sirius will be punished. I can promise you. But expulsion isn’t the answer.”

Remus refused to look at Dumbledore and he must've realized he was getting nowhere with him. He stood but before leaving, he gave a pitiful look.

“I have done terrible deeds, indulged in foolish pranks that I have lived to regret, but each has been a valuable learning experience. It’s a pity that it came to this. Learn in your heart to forgive, Remus. The world is already filled with too much hate.”

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June 16th, 1976

3. Sadness & pain

Remus had been avoiding the Marauder’s dorm. He’d gone as far as begging Madam Pomfrey (who’d taken pity because she knew what happened) to let him stay another two nights before getting kicked out. Remus always healed physically faster and his wounds were already healed by the third day. Pathetically, he’d been sleeping in dingy passageways or the prefects’ bathroom before relocating after being harassed by the ghosts.

Remus had a plan, avoid them; skip classes, get longer prefect duties, never staying in one spot for too long. He wouldn’t know what would happen if Snape saw him. Although, whatever Dumbledore told him, it kept Snape quite so far. But tonight, he got tired of Moaning Myrtle sobbing.

Before curfew, Remus made it a habit of visiting Y/N, who was still stuck in the wing; both out of guilt and because she was his friend, but he couldn't stay for long — seeing her like that made him wallow in guilt.

Similar to him, Lily had visited, along with the other girls, every day. Today, Lily stayed a little longer, bleeding into the time Remus usually dropped by. He watched as Lily whisper into her ear, causing Y/N to laugh and Lily blush madly as she sat snug by her side. Not wanting to ruin their moment, Remus went to leave before they had the chance to see him.

Remus had another pressing matter anyway.

He entered one of the nearest bathrooms to give himself some sort of pep talk and stared at the mirror.

You can do this. A voice echoed in his head.

Typically, memories from the full moon came back to Remus a few days or even weeks later, his brain usually too foggy a couple of hours after and even then, he would never fully remember everything. He vaguely remembered seeing a flash of Snape’s face and Prongs but Y/N’s screams were one of the clearer memories from that night.

“REMUS! PLEASE REMUS! STOP!”

Remus looked to stare at himself in the mirror. He observed the scar on the bridge of his nose, feeling bile rush up his throat at the sight.

He was a freak, littered with scars covering himself.

He was disgusting.

Ugly.

Pathetic.

Dangerous.

A monster!

4. Anger

Sirius Black had always been loyal, so what changed that night?

He needed to leave. It was no good staying here anymore.

Remus was shaking with rage, twinged with hurt. He paced outside of the common room door and had a few options running through him. Either start a huge fight with Sirius or just… ignore it.

Avoidance.

Maybe he could ignore Sirius forever? Impossible, surely. Sirius would get bored, anxious within a couple of weeks — that was too generous — a few days sounded right.

With his mind made up, Remus crept up to his room. He could hear the faint shouts of James and pondered about just sleeping in the common room or prefects’ bathroom. Even if he did have to listen to Moaning Myrtle.

Maybe because his senses were still coming down from its peak or James was just brash, but Remus didn’t even have to press his ear on the door.

“— done ENOUGH! — hear me? You better — why are YOU crying? You bloody — understand? Understand?! You will not talk — him — best friends my —”

The only person he's told he was coming back was Wormtail and it sounded like he told Prongs.

Remus didn’t care to listen anymore as he pushed open the door. Pete was sitting on his bed, eyes wide at Remus’ presence surrounded by unwrapped wrappers. He always tended to eat while stressed.

Sirius was looking down at the floor as James stood in front of him, scolding him like a child. But, his head shot up once he walked through the door. Out of his peripheral vision, he could see his eyes bloodshot, puffy and circles dark. He didn’t dare look at him.

Remus didn’t acknowledge them, instead moving robotically to the bathroom, changing into his holey yet comfortable clothes before scurrying off to bed, swinging his curtains shut before casting a silencing spell around.

He’d plan to adhere to his avoidance strategy. It worked so far.

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June 18th, 1976 | 1:29 am

“Psst… Moony.”

Remus turned over to face him. “What do you want Peter?”

“Just wanted to check up. You okay?”

“What do you think? Please, leave me alone.” And then closed his bed drapes.

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June 19th, 1976 | 11:37 pm

Peter had crept up to his bed again as Remus laid there awake, thoughts swarming him.

“I’m not in the mood. I’m tired.” He moved to turn over and forced his eyes closed.

Peter had been nothing but amazing. Always thinking about him and his needs but what Remus wanted most was to be alone and Peter's pity and worried features did nothing but make Remus feel like shit.

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June 21st, 1976

In life, there are few things that are certain. Getting older, death, taxes… No matter how hard we try, no matter how good our morals are or our intentions, we all will eventually make mistakes. It’s either as small as burning your food or writing the wrong answer down on a test, but you’re also going to fuck up pretty bad and hurt people. Say something — do something you don’t mean and it’ll end up with both sides hurt. If you want forgiveness, there’s multiple solutions to gain that back, but the two words — obvious, there, waving in front of your face — can be the hardest words to say.

“I’m sorry.” Black muttered for the hundredth time that night. His voice was pushing Remus to the edge as he kept his face straight. Dead. Not once taking Sirius’ shitty apology baits. He continued to stare down at his book, reading silently in his dorm. His teeth hurt from how hard he was clenching his jaw.

Remus was right, of course, he was fucking right. Black had grown anxious as he ignored him.

“I’m sorry.”

Remus never really considered himself violent. Sure, he’s gotten into rows that ended with a punch or hex here or there, but Remus didn’t have violent thoughts. If anything, he prided himself on not being a bonehead like Black and Prongs. But, it took every ounce not to beat the shit out of Black right there and then.

Bastard. Scumbag. You mother fucking betrayer.

Remus never liked not being in control. Not having it scared him too much, feeling more animal than man. He did everything to avoid being violent, the wolf was already violent enough and had too much control and Remus refused to let it dictate human him. There was already too much violence, he never wanted to contribute more.

He did everything not to be a monster. But it's like the wolf roared from deep within, scratching and begging to let him pounce.

Remus wasn’t violent — anyone who met him would vouch for that. Fuck, if he saw a spider, he would open a nearby window and release it. But now, he wanted to slam Sirius against a wall and wrap his hands around his neck and squeeze.

You piece of shit. Wanker. Twat. I want you to feel as much pain as I do.

“Moony, please let me explain —”

All the words suddenly blurred before Remus slammed his book shut, causing to become still and quiet.

Sirius trying to explain — excuse his actions — pushed him over the edge. Remus sent a venomous glare at Sirius, waiting for him to talk. His quietness made everyone uneasy.

Selfish bastard.

Any sympathy Remus held for him this past year, along with any logic, evaporated to the point where he felt a rabid thump spread through him. There was a desperation to relieve himself of it — lash out, scream, cry —

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it,” the rest of the Marauders watched the scene, knowing not to get involved. “It was a mistake and —“

“A mistake?”

Sirius perked up at this. That was the only word he’d spoken to him since the incident. “Honest. I did it because —” “Shut the fuck up.” Remus stood, tall and loomed over Sirius. He could almost smell the fear off him.

He had never been so mad before.

“I — I… I,” stutters Remus. But instead of it being out of shyness or nerves, it was out of pure wrath that he wasn’t able to articulate his emotions properly. He took a deep breath in, attempting to regain control over his emotions but failed as he burned with deep, seething hatred. “I am the monster that mothers tell their children to keep them in at night.”

“Moony —”

“Don’t call me that!” His voice boomed so loud that everyone in the room had to take a step back and shrink down. Remus was always so reserved, only ever lashing out in annoyance close to the full moon but nothing more.

“Living up to your name, aren’t you?” There’s a sarcastic, bitter humour lilt to his voice.

Someone so in control of his emotions, someone with an unbreakable exterior, the only glimpses they’d ever seen of Remus losing control was him snapping at someone close to the full moon but would later apologize within mere seconds. But to see him like that… it was an intrusion, something the Marauders hadn’t ever seen or wanted to before.

“Please, just calm down so we can talk.”

Remus paces around the room. “You — y’know I’ve never understood why everyone lets you get around treating others like shit. First, it was Marlene, James, me, Peter, Lily and Y/N — we all let you get away with it. Outburst after outburst, we all sat back because you were going through shit. But I can’t? I’m not allowed to get angry?!”

Sirius wouldn’t look at him.

“Look at me.” Remus kept his voice low throughout the ordeal, only ever raising if Black interjected. “You coward, look at me!”

5. A lot of anger

He couldn’t meet his eyes so he settled to stare at the scar across his nose. It only angered him more as Remus picked Sirius up and pushed him against the wall as he fisted his shirt.

“I’m sorry.”

Sorry is nothing but a word to you. I gave you my most trusted secrets. I confided in you. I was there for you when you needed it. I loved and cared for you like my own brother but I was nothing more than a pet that you discarded when you got bored. You’re only guilty because of the repercussions you’re facing. Your guilt isn’t nearly enough. Bastard. I trusted you. You’re a Marauder. My best friend. I would’ve done anything for you. You fucking ruined it.

“You did this! You did!”

“I know. I’m sorry.”

He laughs, mocking and loud, void of any emotion. “No, you aren’t. You’re never fucking sorry!”

Stupid fucking selfish arsehole.

“For years you’ve told me that you accepted me — cared for me — loved me like your own brother! That what I am — a-a monster — that it didn’t matter!”

“It didn’t mean anything, I promise! It was a shitty, fucked up prank —”

“A prank?! You used me as a weapon! A toy because how could anyone ever love a werewolf?” Remus’ voice was so low. “You’ve never respected me. If you had any, you wouldn’t have — you - wouldn’t....”

Everything came crashing on Remus at once.

6. The realization settles in

And after nine days, Remus Lupin had finally realized what Sirius Black had done. Before, everything he felt had been true but he hadn’t fully realized the gravity of what happened, as silly as it sounds.

Sirius turned his worst fear into a living nightmare.

In the background, one of James’ Quidditch posters, encased in glass exploded, shattering into millions of pieces from the amount of pure magic radiating off Remus. He didn’t even flinch at the sound.

James finally interjected, placing a hand on Remus’ shoulder. “Lay off him… He isn’t worth it.”

Remus eased off Black instantly. “You had no right… no right…” He pointed. Remus turned his face down as he felt tears build up.

“I trusted you,” he whispers. “Every bit.”

Remus stormed out of the dorm, going to sleep in the common room.

━━━━━━━━━༻☽༺━━━━━━━━━

June 22nd, 1976

7. Depression

When Remus finally let himself cry, he didn’t make a move to leave his bed. Even skipping meal times, leaving James or Pete to bring him food.

Everything felt suffocating, a gnawing feeling that made every part of him ache. Remus couldn’t handle anymore pain or emotions from ‘the prank’ as he felt himself slip into a temporary void.

He hugged his pillow tighter and closed his eyes once more.

━━━━━━━━━༻☽༺━━━━━━━━━

June 23rd, 1976 | 11: 37 pm

Remus had gone straight to bed again, effectively shutting up the rest of the dorm. James was ignoring Black, leaving Remus surprised that he hadn’t made a move to defend his actions. Nonetheless, he was appreciative still. Peter had been trying to appease everyone, not taking sides but still must’ve thought Sirius was in the wrong because he hadn’t talked to him much.

He didn’t ask James to choose between him or Black. Remus was never one for ultimatums but even then, it seemed like James picked him. He was beyond furious, seemingly more than Remus at this point who pathetically wallowed in his depression. He wouldn’t spare Black a second glance, wouldn’t talk to him, shut him down if he tried to speak to him. Hell, he’d even gone as far as to make it very clear to the entirety of Hogwarts that they were no longer friends, making sure to not sit with him, ever. Always choosing to sit by Remus.

They chose his side and a part of Remus felt elated to know they had his back.

This left Black alone, looking at them through tearful gazes. Remus had been ignoring all of them and they seemed to be understanding, avoiding crossing the wordless boundary Remus set in stone.

But, both James and Peter had been checking up on him nightly, always there and he could tell they were getting impatient.

When the lights went out, he heard James crept out of bed. Usually, Remus would find some sort of comfort in knowing who was approaching him, but now, it only left him feeling uneasy.

And then he felt the bed dip and James muttered out a spell.

“Hey, Moony.”

Remus didn’t face him. “Prongs?”

“Hey,” there was a loud sigh, “Do you need anything?”

What was he supposed to say? A hug? To talk? He’d much rather use his avoidance strategy, although he realized it left him alone with too many thoughts and nobody to confide in.

“M’good.” He felt James place a hand on his shoulder.

“I’ll always be there for you. That’s what Marau - that’s what friends are for, no?”

Remus didn’t answer and felt James move to leave. But before he had the chance to slip out, Remus peeked his head from the drapes, announcing just loud enough for Sirius to hear.

“Thanks for saving all of us, James. You’re a true friend.”

━━━━━━━━━༻☽༺━━━━━━━━━

June 24th, 1976

People had their poisons.

Alcohol can make you forget. It blocks out everything and makes the rest of the world fade away until you can’t remember. People gambled to feel a rush, only to realize they dug themself into irreversible debt. Shopping, food, the high from risky behaviour…

But how we manage our poisons is up to the person.

People love to deny that they have addictions. They deny they’re hooked, they deny that they can’t put it down, they deny that they’re scared or want to stop. People only see what they want to see, believe what they want to believe.

And then the truth becomes muddled with lies that it’s hard to recognize the poisons sitting right in front of us. And all we want is more.

For Remus, his poison, his bright red self-destruction button, was smoking.

Granted, he never was a big smoker, typically only smoking when stressed or bored. But he still did it, filling his lungs with poison. But maybe he was wired like that. Besides, what werewolf lives past thirty? Might as well die revelling in the poison that brought him ease…

Remus conjured a ball of bright fire from his hand; fishing out a pack of cigarettes, slipped it past his lips and lit it. He inhaled, feeling the familiar, comforting feeling before dragging it from his lips, blowing out the thick cloud of smoke that left him wanting more.

He’d been sticking to his avoidance tactic strictly now. The Marauders were hovering over him, worry evident on their faces. A few times, Lily and James both invited him to sit. They never fought anymore, or at least in front of him, and it probably was his doing — a group effort into getting him to talk.

So even Lily knew something was wrong… Snape probably told her…

The door clicked open and Remus didn’t have to turn around to know how it was.

“Leave me alone. I’m not ready to talk.”

“Wasn’t gonna make you.”

He spun around, that wasn’t James or Peter. His face softened.

“Well… I’m not,” Y/N said simply, “But the others are about to.”

Remus groaned at that but Y/N smiled and turned around, ushering him over with a little wave. In one hand, she raised the Marauder’s map. “C’mon, I know a place and that they won’t be able to find.”

Remus was intrigued. He stepped out the butt of the cigarette, flicked it into the trash and followed her. Surely he’d already been there but being with Y/N seemed ten folds better than being around the other Marauders.

He followed wordlessly, passageways flying through his head but she never stopped by them. Instead, she climbed onto a ledge, slipping into an area under a large curtain. He followed, eyes lighting up in awe. He’s definitely never been there before.

“Get comfortable,” she said, flinging him a pillow and lighting a few candles.

They sat opposed to each other in complete silence. Y/N flicked back and forth, watching James and Peter scrabble around the castle looking for him. A few times, they passed by, each time leaving Y/N amused.

Remus tapped his leg anxiously. The question remained: Why wasn’t she disgusted with him? Why was she helping him? Why wasn’t she afraid?

Now alone together, those questions dangled on his tongue.

“Why aren’t you afraid of me?”

She looked up at him, finally putting down the map. “Because you’re Remus.” She said, like it was the most obvious answer. “You’re not scary.”

8. Hold onto doubt

The answer irritated him. Another memory unfolded then and he blurted it out. “Why didn’t you cast any spells at me?”

Her brows rose, “I didn’t want to hurt you.”

“I’m dangerous.” His voice was bleak and cold. “Why can't you grasp that?”

She stays quiet for a long time, her head turning to look out the large window. Y/N watched the owls and labyrinth of ancient trees of the forbidden forest and Remus was painfully aware of time slipping by.

“Do you remember that night on the astronomy tower on Halloween? I said that there’s bound to be someone looking at the moon at the same time?”

It takes Remus a moment to remember, but he does. “Yeah. You said that it’s like you’re not alone.”

Y/N turns around to face him. “Exactly. You don’t have to be alone in this.”

He looked away, deliberating. “It’s one thing for me to be alone but then drag you and others down with me.”

“Remus, I’m not going to lie and say I wasn’t scared. I was terrified. I thought that was it.” He gulped. “But I could never be scared of you. The real you - the you right now. I don’t care about what you are. You are more than just a werewolf. I feel safe with you.”

The dark shadows surrounded them as she reiterated herself. “You don’t have to be alone in this.”

He soaks in her words for a while. This time, peering out the window as he breathes in deeply.

Okay. He decided.

“Do you want to know how I got —” he pointed at a scar on his upper forearm. “— this?”

She nodded her head.

“When James turned into his animagus form to show me for the first time, his antlers pierced my skin. I had to lie to Pomfrey and say I fell while playing Quidditch.”

Any invisible barrier between them crashed instantly as she smiled brightly and laughed. So infectious, Remus couldn't help but flash a real grin.

He never realized how beautiful her smile was.

“Oh, and if you ever tell anyone about this place, I’ll skin you.”

“I would never.”

Remus scouted over to her, pressing his back against the cool stone as they sat together in a comfortable stillness. But then she shifted, opening her arms wide. He lent in without hesitation and her arms flung around his neck, pulling him into a tight embrace.

He felt salty tears stinging in the corners of his eyes and let himself soak in her warm.

He really needed that.

Over her shoulder, he returned to watch the stars.

9. Acceptance

Remus learned from a young age that it was better to keep people at an arm's length. Get too close, they’ll dig, find out his condition, fear him and run.

He hates to say it, but he’s not surprised that his secret slipped out. He got too comfortable, got too close... It’s just that the Sirius component was surprising.

But maybe it wasn’t surprising. Ever since the beginning of the year, especially since winter break, Sirius had been reckless more and more lately, and he probably should have seen it coming. He was wild as a result of being freed from the confines of his rigid upbringing.

Sirius Black was unpredictable.

Sirius Black was dangerous when it came to secrets.

Sirius Black was one of his best friends.

Sometimes betrayal is so profound that there’s no way to fix what was lost. The damage is done, irreplaceable, unfixable.

If Remus was sure of anything by the end of that week was that,

a) James Potter and Peter Pettigrew were still his best friends,

b) He almost killed Severus Snape and Y/N L/N,

c) Y/N knew his secret and despite everything, continued to talk to him, support him, be there for him — she accepted him,

d) His walls went up a higher, became stronger and insecurities ran deeper,

e) Lastly, Remus Lupin would never, ever forgive Sirius Black for what he did. Never.

━━━━━━━━━༻☽༺━━━━━━━━━

【 Next Chapter 】

© gotkindabored 2021. Do not repost or modify

[mego42]

OK but!!! Come over here and randomly sink the 8 ball???? Can we talk about this???? Does rio not understand how the game of pool works??? Was he just hanging out playing against himself prior to this??? Is it a metaphor??? Is 8 the only number he knows???? THOUGHTS????

the fact that we open the scene with a center shot of beth, all bambi-eyes and openly???? letting him see???? her vulnerable????????

the fact that she still sees him as a lifeline and turns to him for help in spite of him being demonstrably useless literally every time she’s asked

the fact that he’s open to it and asks what she needs

aaaaaand then shuts her down when she says it’s for dean

but also is still giving her some p solid, if, you know, a touch sociopathic advice

and then the fact that said advice more or less amounts to please let your ~technical husband rot in jail crime wife

and yes, the fact that he is, apparently just hanging out! in his own bar! after hours! alone! playing pool with himself!

which sounds like it should be a euphemism tbh but no! it is entirely literal!

everyone involved in this show is a lunatic including all of us!

i love it!

literally wtf are you doing rio

i would like to point out he is losing to himself which is fucking hysterical

and also extremely apt, tbh

he climbs up the pool cue when he stands. why. to what purpose.

he told her to be smart before he murdered her co-worker and beth’s like, not even phased at all by that reference

i am teLlinG y’alL murder is their foreplay, the hitman thing’s gonna be fine

if anything he’s gonna be hurt she outsourced it

which, valid!!!!!!

why are his fingers so long why why WHY

every time he lines up and takes a shot i make this sort of garbled hairpin in a vacuum cleaner noise

i didn’t ask to be like this

and when he sees that the please let him rot please please please pitch is not helping beth’s stress level he pivots and like, actually tries to be comforting????????

but is also incredibly bad at it

remember when beth was like my husband took my children and rio was like that sucks, here’s an open tab byyyyyyeeeeee

he is not the best shoulder, is what i’m saying

and yet!! she keeps going to him anyway!!!!

he’s like SIVER LINING MAYBE YOU’LL WANT TO FUCK YOUR HUSBAND AGAIN AND BETH JUST STEAMROLLS RIGHT PAST THAT

it like doesn’t even register

fuck that guy? don’t be absurd crime husband

also like

who exactly might want to hit what again hmmmmmmm HMMMMMMMMMMM

i am just saying it feels like there are some layErs here

he is so satisfied when she points out nothing sticks to him i want to slap him i want to slap myself i want to slap everyone

i gOt lucK oN my siDe / mayBe yoU do tOo

smells like foreshadowing in here

also jumping back the way his smile s o f t e n s when he says maybe you do too

the urge to slap remains strong but now with a side of leave mE here tO diE

(bringing back @pynkhues​ tag meanderings bc it lives in my head now, is this rio’s way of saying he can protect her class please discuss)

and now we arrive at sink the eight ball

i know it’s ridiculous i know but i can’t help it they’re standing there with a the pool cue and the pool table and it’s all weird tangled intimacy that’s about to flip over into intense sexual tension and i am not coping well with this at all

i’m not okay

THE WAY HE PULLS THE CUE AWAY

AND THE WAY SHE’S LIKE THIS MOTHERFUCKER I STG

let beth boland unhinge her jaw and devour the world 2k21 she deserves it

idk what to tell you beth you like it

like let’s pause for a sec and examine the situation shall we? this ep provides some really interesting contrast between beth’s extremely different relationships with the men in her life.

1. we have dean who is, i would argue, shown throughout the ep to be a complete albatross of guilt and long expired, turned toxic gratitude dangling from a rapidly fraying thread called parenting. he’s furious with beth to the point of not wanting to see her while in prison, choosing to stay in prison to avoid coping with how thoroughly their house of cards is tumbling down and the reality of who beth is and who they are to each other that collapse is exposing. 2. we have fitzpatrick who repeatedly tramples her boundaries in a tunnel vision pursuit of the person he thinks she is and his fantasy of the relationship he could have with this person who doesn’t actually exist and we’ve seen how uncomfortable it makes beth to the point that she finally blows up at him, reasserting who she is and it, idk if i would say scares him, but it definitely turns him off. 3. and then we have rio who she is locked in a nightmare game of cat and mouse with, who she has convinced herself is the source of all of her problems and yet when push comes to shove is still the person that she turns to for guidance and support, who she has no objection to sharing physical space with (i hear rumors the pool scene reads wildly divide and yeah i can see how but i am firmly camp they are both experiencing some stupidly complicated emotional upheaval and that’s what that face is, y’all take it how you will), who is also the only person this ep to witness the single, genuine, uncomplicatedly happy glimpse of one elizabeth boland née marks (who can’t help but grin in response to her joy and honestly who wouldn’t she is so gd cUte before he rips the rug out from underneath her)

i got worked up and forgot where i was going with this

something about contrast

but also the like, comfort and familiarity and ease even when Extremely Annoyed

idk i just think it’s neat

let’s see what else happens

oh right they play """"""""""pool"""""""""""

wait no, we’re not there yet

first rio’s gotta do that big-eyed disney princess look he shoots beth’s way from time to time, 209 being the notable example that comes to mind

h E Lp

so now we’re at sinking the eight ball

yeah, no, he does not know how pool works

i’d say it’s embarrassing but what isn’t with them

SPEAKING OF EMBARRASSING

or maybe i mean inexplicable

i tried to be v hardcore on not letting myself speculate about the pool scene and how it would come to be so sexy bc speculation has only ever led to either disappointment or me getting really, really over the top competitive about it to the point where it isn’t even fun for me anymore (which is saying something) but i couldn’t help spinning out potential scenarios bc like why???? how????? the man is draped over her like a blanket and smELliNg heR haiR surely that doesn’t just happen??????

WHAT A FOOL I WAS

LITERALLY FOR NO REASON AT ALL RIO’S LIKE FUCK YOUR PERSONAL SPACE CRIME WIFE IT’S OUR PERSONAL SPACE

AND BETH’S JUST LIKE YEAH SURE CRIME HUSBAND THIS IS FINE AND NORMAL I HAVE NO FURTHER COMMENTARY

LIKE?????????????????????????????????????????

h An dS

hAn D S

H a nD s

anD theN hE smelLs heR hAir like a fuckiN lunAtic

i just

TO WHAT PURPOSE

SCIENCE P L E A S E E X P L A I N

i know we all like to argue until the cows come home over what specific flavor of sloppy the show is and then we argue with the cows but like

this didn’t happen out of nowhere

they’re setting something up

(they fuckin’)

(do not argue with me or my cows)

thE shoUldeR roLl

no thoughts just that

AND THEN SHE MAKES IT

(and everything b o u n c e s)

AND SHE’S SO CUTE????? MY WIFE???????? I LOVE HER????????????

no but literally when was the last time beth was that happy

it’s so pure

and it makes him lauGh toO

s Of t

and then rio’s like no but seriously fuck your husband let him rot in jail and beth’s facce falls and my heart breaks and everyone remembers everything is terrible bc they are absolutely inFURIATING nigHTMARE PEOPLE who caNNOT USE THEIR WORDs

what was the actual question here i don’t even remember

oh right why the eight ball

probs bc it color coordinated with both his and beth’s outfits bc he is A Heaux Like That

[yanagochiold]

valentines day alphabet.

A   :   AFFECTION.   how does your muse show affection?

in general, she’s big on skinship so she’ll hug, hold hands, link arms, etc. with her friends. she likes keeping in touch despite schedules so she’ll also try to keep up with their sns accounts to see what they’re up to. she enjoys cooking a lot so she’ll also make sure to show her affections by cooking for those who matters. gift giving from time to time, specially towards her dancers and staff. 

towards a lover, likewise she’ll also be big on physical display of affection. kisses, hugs, hand holding, cuddling, lap sitting. for someone who possesses a “strong” image on screen, she’ll be pliant and cater to what her lover needs. she’ll bicker and tease a lot, probably find something to laugh about too. she’s vocal with her feelings and what she wants. since she’s often away for work, she’ll try to spend as much time as she can with them during her free time but make sure to stay connected when they’re apart. 

B   :   BOUQUET.   does your muse like flowers? which ones are their favourite?

she does like flowers, doesn’t matter what kind but she thinks tulips and sunflowers are very pretty. yellow flowers in general is very uplifting. if giving it to her as a romantic gesture, i think she’d feel more giddy with a plant lmao. 

C   :   CHOCOLATE.   does your muse like chocolate? which one is their favourite?

i think she enjoys using it in recipes more than eating it. she probably likes anything hazelnut and anything with caramel. 

D   :   DATE.   what is your muse’s ideal date? where / who with / etc?

something intimate and private, far away from prying eyes. trips abroad, going around in cities she’s always wanted to visit. beach trips, she’ll like that since she likes going tanning and wearing cute little swimsuits lmao. which is ironic, because girly is kinda scared of water???  

who with? her fiancée. she might joke around and say that she’ll like to go out on a date with simon dominic too. 

E   :   EMBRACE.   does your muse like hugs? what are their hugs like?

she does. she probably likes back hugs the most from a lover. 

F   :   FLIRT.   is your muse good at flirting? how do they flirt?

she’s good at flirting with fans on stage, does that count? winking, coy and teasing gestures, swaying from side to side, etc. so i guess her way of flirting can be very physical lol. as for actually flirting romantically, only with those who she has chemistry with. 

G   :   GIFT.   is your muse good at gift - giving or do they struggle to get it right?

i want to say she’s got a pretty good sense at it. she might go over the top sometimes, she’ll be the type to give expensive gifts towards those she wants to thank. 

H   :   HEART.   is your muse quick or slow to give their heart away?

somewhere in between? even if she ends up liking someone quickly, she won’t act on it right away. 

I    :   I LOVE YOU.   does your muse find ‘i love you’ easy or hard to say?

no. if she loves someone and wants to tell them, she’ll just say it. 

J   :   JEALOUSY.   does your muse get jealous in a relationship?

not typically, probably only under certain instances and not unless she’s given a reason to be jealous.

K   :   KISS.   is your muse a good kisser? why / why not?

er. maybe???? she’d like to think she is??? i mean her man hasn’t broken up with her so she’d probably say yes? 😂

L   :   LOVE.   who does your muse love?

her parents (even though they’ve had some rough times dealing with each other and her road to becoming an idol). her older brother even though he always bullied her when they were younger. her fiancée. her members. staff members who’s worked with her since day one. bambi and moana. loyal and understanding fans. her friends.

M   :   MOONLIGHT.   is your muse big on cuddling?

yes. 

N   :   NAUGHTY.   what is your muse like in bed?

straightforward, coy, playful, curious. as a dancer, she takes advantage of knowing how to move her body.

O   :   ODE.   does your muse have a way with words?

yes? she’s written songs on her own before so i want to say yes. she’s able to convey her feelings through writing music the most. 

P   :   PARTNER.   what does your muse look for in a partner? looks / personality?

looks doesn’t matter to her but i think she’ll like someone more athletic/fit in general. broad shoulders in a man, a pretty body line in women. anyone who has a pretty smile (dimples are a plus). personality wise, someone patient and understanding, specially with the nature of her work. being able to connect intellectually will be attractive to her. someone who has the same sense of humor as she does will be a big thing. other traits she’ll like are reliable, adventurous, funny, and driven.  

Q   :   QUESTION.   would your muse ask the big question or expect their partner to?

she’d ask. if she feels like saying something or asking something, she’ll blurt it out without beating around the bush. 

R   :   ROMANCE.   is your muse a romantic or a cynic?

a bit of both. she’s got her fair share of heartbreak and relationships with people both in and out of the industry not working out due to different circumstances so she’s learned through the years. 

S   :   SWEETHEART.   did your muse have a childhood sweetheart?

nope, she was too busy training. she probably had a crush but that’s as far as it goes. 

T   :   TRUE LOVE.   does your muse believe in true love?

yes. not romantic true love per se, but true love in other forms such as her love for her members and her love for her dogs. 

U   :   UNREQUITED.   has your muse had their heart broken?

yes. the last partner she had before her fiancée was someone from the industry who she was hoping to work things out with but in the end, he couldn’t give her the same amount of commitment and time that she was willing to allot for the relationship. 

she also “broke up” (separated?) from her fiancée for a while - at the time she suppressed her emotions but she was pretty disappointed by being left. 

V   :   VALENTINE.   how does your muse feel about valentine’s day?

she doesn’t like it; she doesn’t see why there needs to be a special day to celebrate love, not when it should be celebrated every day of the year. 

W  :   WEDDING.   would your muse get married? why / why not?

if you asked her this while she was still younger, she would say “probably not” only because at the time, she would have thought that a career in the music industry is greater than her desire romance. she’d think that would remain a constant thing even when she’s established herself.

up until her fiancée proposed, she was hesitant in the idea of marriage because of how it would affect her career, her members and her fans. but weighing that and the thought of living in the future without him, she's more certain of a marriage. if it’s a sacrifice she’ll have to make, she’ll do so (but of course, she’s hopeful that there will be a happy medium to this). 

X   :   XOXO.   does your muse use / like pet names?

she enjoys it. even silly little nicknames, she’ll really like it. 

Y   :   YOURS.   does your muse get protective easily?

depends on who and from who but in general, yes. 

Z   :   ZZZ.   how many people has your muse slept with?

she’ll probably be able to count it with one hand. 

[gagmebucky]

thank you to taylor @blessedbucky​, mia @theamericanfalcon, liz @marvelous-mr-stark, raechel, shayla, lauren, courtney, em and tina for allowing me to write this content as well as my beta reader kat @angel-fire​! love you all!

read the full synopsis and excerpt // read chapters snippets here.

o. in which you accidentally send your nudes to your brothers’ best friend. (includes reader’s pov, bucky’s pov, mentions of sexting.)

—

Initially, taking the photos—exposing yourself in such an intimate state to another—you were hesitant. It wasn’t the possible repercussions, i.e. revenge porn, that gave you pause but more-so an insecurity in your own body. Having never done something like this before, you briefly dithered between whether you should or not. 

Ultimately, however, you do. The guy had spent money on you, went through the trouble of finding something you’d like and shipped it discreetly. And when you slip the racy number on, your insecurities wash away and leave excitement in its wake. Everything about it you love, and it has you preening in a solo photo shoot you’re eager to show off. 

After a good time of selfie shutters bulking your phone’s storage—positions of you scantily-clad standing, sitting, a cross of both—you finally relent. There’s too many pictures to pick from, but you do. Three poses that optimize the best aspects of the outfit and that you think he’ll like the best have you buzzing in anticipation of his reaction. 

Giddy, you tap them directly on the album app and click the share button; you input the letter B in the ‘To:’ slot. Since there’s only two contact names under that letter, his name shows up immediately, the first with the nickname Bucky beneath it. You gloss over that and in quick succession, you quickly hit the contact and press send. 

For a split second, you’re proud: you’ve taken this e-relationship to the next level like he wanted, and he’ll be happy with you. Then it hits you like a brick through glass. A replay of your actions travel to your brain, and you belatedly realize what your eyes saw—your thumb smearing too low on the screen, so instead of Brock as the recipient, it’s Bucky. 

“No, no, no!” you whisper as your heart hurtles like a jackhammer stuck in your rib cage. 

A part of you insists it’s your paranoia playing tricks on you, and that’s a valid rationale because this whole thing does worry you about getting caught. Except, upon checking its legitimacy, you confirm what you accidentally did. There’s no mistaking it, now, because with your brightness turned up full, your partially nude figure stares you in the face underneath of a thread between you and your brothers’ best friend. 

James Bucky Barnes—the man who’s nicknamed you bambi because the numerous times he’s seen you face-plant over your own footing, the twenty-four year old who still ruffles your hair when he greets you, the soon-to-be business owner who dates certified models—has a trio of your attempts to be seductive; bottom lined with text you hope comes off likewise seductive.

Mortification swallows you. Your skin burns hotter and hotter by the second. Sure, you’ve embarrassed yourself before: you fall a lot, and you’re awkward conversationalist. But never something of this magnitude, not something that makes you seem so desperate and pathetic. 

You can imagine him opening the messages. He’d immediately assume, understandably, it’s a come-on; a girl trying to be a woman’s failed goal to enthrall a man like him, his best friend’s kid sister’s pitiful effort to be anything other than just that. As if you could ever measure up to the types of women he dates. 

And, yes, there’s been a time where you had a crush on him. But it’s not your fault when he looks like how he does, a rugged example of masculine sex appeal, and treating you the way he does, teasing but with a twist of kindness, and the fact that he’s the only non-blood related man allowed near you. 

But that time has passed. Even then, you knew the one-sided attraction was delusional to have. You were—still are—so sure about it that you never even dared to fantasize about him and the rumors that used to trek behind him about his sexual escapades. There’s no hidden desire to be with him, and that worsens it because it’s not like you’d feel any relief in knowing his reaction. You don’t care about his reaction in the first place!

Now, no matter how much you will insist it’s an accident, there will always be a dubiousness about it. With how close your families are, things are going to be tense. Because there’s no forgetting he’s viewed you like that, and there’s photo evidence of it. 

It hits you then. The extremity of your fuckup douses you in ice, and your muscles freeze because you register that since he knows about your family borderline patriarchal values concerning you, he has to tell them you’re taking nudes, and it will be over for you. 

It has taken you twenty years of your life to finally venture outside what your family has allowed, to sate your curiosity of what exactly your fathers and older siblings have kept so strictly from you: sex and all the goodness it entails. 

It has taken you an additional six months to explore in-depth and build the courage to start something tangible, to wander the depraved side of the internet where strangers did things to each other that made you want to do things with someone of your own: stirring foreign but oh-so amazing feelings in your nether regions. 

For twenty-six weeks you carefully treaded across in order to ensure your family had no clue what you’re doing, clearing your web history and using incognito mode, all your accounts anonymous, keeping your notifications on silent in case anyone becomes suspicious of who’s continuously contacting you. 

One hundred and eighty-two days later—in the middle of which you started your sex-based communication—of preparing to lose your virginity, your family will find out what you’ve been up to, and your life will be hell. 

Everything has been going so perfectly. You found a guy enough distance away he isn't affected by your family’s influence, middle-aged so he’s experience and doesn’t mind handling a virgin, and is willing to drive an hour to meet you at a specified hotel when the time comes.  

All that hard work down the drain. 

You toss your phone and jump to your feet. Panicked, your bare feet pad back and forth on your rug-covered wood floors. Your teeth gnaw at your thumbnail as different scenarios of how everything will transpire flit through your head. Each one is more terrible than the last, and your anxiety heightens. 

Somewhere in your disquietude, it occurs to you. Your brothers are downstairs and so is Bucky, but it’s ten o’clock at night, and that means they’re gaming. That particular activity coined a rule that all players have to stow their phones in the guest room. The specifics are blurry but it was something about Bucky interrupting the session due to excessive texts. 

It’s an opportunity. A chance that you can creep downstairs, swipe his phone and delete your mistake—hell, you’ll break his phone if you need to—before he’s any the wiser. 

“And—” Bucky Barnes drawls out the vowel as the rough-textured ball hurls through the air and swishes sharply into the hoop. “—nothin’ but net.” He relaxes from the perfected basketball follow-through stance, hands dropping to his sides, while he regards his old friend with a cocky smile. “Beat that, Rogers.” 

Steve snorts and catches the ball when it bounces onto the concrete. Palming it in one hand, he dribbles it twice and trades positions so instead of being stationed next to the hoop, he’s descended to the driveway curb where the established three-pointer line is. 

“You still got it, Barnes,” the blond admits, loosening his shoulders and spreading his footing to be a width apart. His right hand balances the ball from below, elbow tucked underneath, while the left splays against the side as his knees bend, and he springs up. With a practiced flick of his wrist, he releases the orange sphere at the top of his jump. It catapults in a flawless arc and drops through criss-crossed netting with a similar swish. His lips curve with satisfaction as he adds, “But, so do I.”

Bucky laughs and seizes the ball as it falls free. “Callum and Henry have no idea they’re going to get obliterated,” he says, coming to slap his palm in an affable embrace. “Fair warning, they’re still as sore losers as they were five years ago so be prepared for that.” 

Steve Rogers chuckles. The former fourth to their high school cliquè, he’s aware of just how bad sports they are. 

After graduation, he left out-of-state to pursue a degree in technological engineering, which he acquired last month in May, prompting his return back to New York. Between the four of them, Bucky and Steve are the level headed ones so he’s glad to have the support to handle the wild children his childhood best friends are. 

“Speaking of,” Steve starts, dirty blond eyebrows knitting as he glances around the neighborhood’s cul-de-sac. “Where are they? I thought Henry was supposed to be waking up Callum? If we aren’t starting yet, then can I get my phone back?” 

Bucky clicks his teeth. “Yeah. They’re probably stuffing their faces right now. Their sister went grocery shopping and got a cake so. . .” He waves his hand in gesture before continuing in vehement passion on the second point, “The whole phone thing is bullshit, though. I miss a few winning shots ‘cause I was busy with some pretty little thing texting me, and now there’s a ‘no technology rule’.” He scoffs and folds his arms. 

Now that he thinks about it, he could totally have his phone right now. And he’s more interested in having it than usual. There’s this girl he’s been seeing frequently at local parties—six feet tall with gorgeous brown skin, always done up in intricate eye makeup, silver tongued (he’s very interested in her tongue) when she speaks—and he’s finally gotten her number. She could be texting him, and he doesn’t even know it! 

“You know, yeah, we should get our phones back if those assholes want to take all day,” Bucky decides, agreeing with steps toward the closed storm door, but opened front door until he hears the inquiry:

“How is Y/N, anyway?” Steve’s voice is genuinely and harmlessly curious behind him, and he stops in his tracks because Bucky remembers the poorly hid crush he harbored for you. “I saw her instagram the other day, and she must be quite the heartbreaker.” 

Spinning around to face him, Bucky lifts a brow. “Huh?” Then he processes the implication that you’re out dating and such. The mere prospect has him surprising laughter. 

With their dad and his girlfriend on a tour of the world, the three of them are the only ones in the household. Given you’re the baby of your siblings, despite being an independent twenty-year-old, your older brothers have taken it upon themselves to ensure you focus solely on school work. Callum and Henry know exactly how to threaten their message across that you are not to be bothered, and anyone who tries will end up battered and bruised. 

He shakes his head. “Nah. She’s not with anyone, hasn’t been ever,” he tells him. “If you thought Callum and Henry were overprotective back then, you should see them now.” 

Gunmetal blue eyes blink surprised at him, and there’s a faint battle between delight and disappointment. “Really?” He shoves his hands in his sweats and falters somewhat. “It’s gotta be hard considering the way she has grown up,” he says but Bucky’s face scrunches in confusion. “You can’t tell me you don’t see how cute she is.” Before he can respond, Steve adds, “Obviously I wouldn’t ever see or be with her in that way—I wouldn’t betray Callum or Henry like that—but objectively, you can admit she’s gorgeous, right?” 

Bucky has to take a moment and genuinely consider it—consider you—because he hasn’t before. (Other than noticing the genetic similarities to Callum, who shares your eye and hair color but is a shade lighter than you, and Henry, who shares your complexion and eye color, but his hair is darker than yours.)

There’s no denying your looks are better than most: the structure of your face works beautifully, dazzling eyes framed by your lashes and occasionally accentuated by mascara, lips usually adorned in gloss or anything that keeps them hydrated which could be described as alluring, and your hair is almost always done, sometimes switched up in style. But there’s an inherent innocence there, a sweet and clumsy awkwardness, and maybe because he’s watched you grow up, four years your senior, but it just doesn’t do it for him. 

You’re his best friends’ baby sister, for God’s sake. He’d never at you like that in the first place. Especially not when he’s been aware, in the past, you harbored a schoolgirl crush on him. It was painfully obvious, to your chagrin, but he found it adorable—flattering but unsurprising considering girls flock to him like seagulls to boardwalk french fries. 

Currently, he’s sure you know he won’t ever pick you—under principle, under the lack of attraction. Other than pleasant smiles and occasional small talk mixed with teasing, you don’t gaze at him with starry eyes anymore, at least it’s waned significantly as you matured. 

Back to the question: “Uh, no, not really. Even if Callum and Henry didn’t care, I don’t think I’d be attracted to her,” he answers truthfully. Your purity doesn’t provoke his sexual attraction although it does invoke a duty of protectiveness. “She just isn’t my type.” 

Steve arches a brow, a surprised playfulness in his expression. “Oh? Then what is your type, then?” he asks, nudging him with his elbow. ‘Cause from what I remember you’re up for anyone and everyone.”

“That makes me sound like a whore,” he feigns offense but digresses into a fit of chuckles as he thinks back to all his various sex-capades and Steve flashes him a look that says aren’t you? “Yeah.” He nods with a prideful chortle. “But I’m into more frisky girls, y’know? Ones who’ve been everywhere and done everything. They’re brass and loud and just do whatever the fuck they want. I like to be one of those things.” 

Behind him, his best friend, Callum’s orotund voice rings out between the pressurized shh of the storm door, “Buck’s into slutty girls, Steve.”

He cringes at the diction. “Don’t call ‘em slutty. Sounds degrading when you guys say it like that.” Most of the time, he agrees with him—and his brother—but when it comes to women, there’s usually a dissent and a need for correction. “But yeah. I prefer girls with experience,” he declares strongly. “They don’t get attached like girls with... less experience do.”

Callum rolls his eyes, bounding down the porch stairs to the recently pressure-washed driveway, and he plucks the basketball out of his hands. “Here we go again. Bucky and his ‘I hate virgin’s’ campaign,” he mocks, shaking his head. “Doesn’t make any sense to me ‘cause everyone knows virgins are the tightest.”

This time, Bucky is the one to roll his eyes. “Well, that doesn’t make any sense considering tightness isn’t dependent upon whether it’s their first time ‘cause, y’know, vaginas stretch, you morons.” Sometimes he has no clue how Callum passed sex education (then he remembers that he bribed the health teacher). “Meaning a girl can have sex, then after a period of time, her virgin ‘tightness’ eventually returns. The only reason virgins may seem tighter is because they’re usually nervous.” 

The look on Callum’s face says that what he just said went right over his head. “Whatever.” He shrugs and starts dribbling the ball half-heartedly. “I just know the woman I end up with better be a virgin.” 

“Right!” Henry’s likewise orotund voice, a pitch higher, speaks after he pushes through the glass door. He presses to the court-slash-driveway, wiping icing off his mouth. “That’s marriage material. I’m not fucking around in a relationship with no woman that’s been fucked already, y’know?” 

Bucky’s eye twitches, jaw locking for a millisecond. “But you guys aren’t even virgins yourself,” he points out their hypocrisy. When they look at him to rebuttal, he automatically knows it’s going to run his blood pressure up and it’s not worth it. “You know, I’m gonna go to the bathroom. You guys have fun with your conversation.” 

Swiftly, he whirls around and heads for inside. The last thing he hears is Steve’s ambivalent, “I get the appeal of virgins. But you know, I don’t think it really matters. I think it just matters if you’re into them, and if they’re into you. I wouldn’t care either way but. . .” 

The air conditioned air greets him coldly, and he revels in it. The June sun is killer, though perfect weather for playing a game outside, and the chill dries the sweat beaded on his forehead. He pads down the foyer, turns the corner to the bathroom and enters to take a much needed leak. 

Bucky has so much brotherly love for your brothers: neighbors since being in diapers, his mother the female figure in their life, and becoming and remaining best friends for over twenty years. There’s only one thing that grates his nerves when it comes to them and that’s their view of women is somewhat skewed. Sometimes—most of the time—went the topic comes up, he’s always one second away from throttling them. 

Hopefully after he pisses, they’ll be talking about something else, and finally they all can play basketball. It. 

Flushing the toilet, he goes onto wash his hands. He lathers up in orange antibacterial soap and rinses the suds off with hot water. There isn’t a towel, at least not a clean one, so instead he just lets the remaining droplets drip onto the floor. 

Emerging from the bathroom, James pauses and absentmindedly wipes his hands dry on his mesh-polyester shorts. His attention automatically draws to the guest room’s closed door adjacent to his position. A decision strikes him, and he steps forward and casts a curious glance down the corner. 

When boisterous and distracted laughter filters through the front door and down the empty corridor, it springs him into action. He figures there’s no harm in checking his phone while he’s here. He’d been especially resistant to giving it away because he’s engaged in a particularly stimulating conversation with a particularly titillating woman—popular in her own right, he can’t afford to miss his shot with her. 

His fingers turn the knob, and he shoulders through. The furniture is decorated and accented in yellow and white, condition otherwise pristine, save for the phones littered across the king-sized poster bed’s fluffy duvet. He strides across gleaming light oak floors and hones in on the only golden-colored, rubbed encased titanium. 

As he grips it, long digits curling around the back, pinkie supporting the bottom, thumb tapping the screen to life, he can hear the dwindling of high-spirited jesting through the en-suite’s rectangular horizontal slider window; a wondering of where he’s gone has him speeding up. 

Although he’d been gone for under an hour, his screen is bright with various notifications, social media accounts and text messages. He ignores the former and searches for the latter, specifically the contact, Val 😛💦. Scrolling quickly, he comes to a stop but not because of his original intent. 

His head cocks, and he knits his brows when he sees your name instead; formally nicknamed, bambi, due to your penchant for clumsiness and general fragility. You don’t text him—except for that one time you needed to be picked up from the library—and considering you know he’s just outside, his baffled curiosity is further spurred. 

With a sideways swipe of his thumb, your thread enlarges on the high-definition display. He isn’t sure what he expected, but this? Oh, this, definitely is not it. His eyes widen as the content loads, and reveals you, in all your half-naked glory. 

“Shit,” he breathes out raggedly, blinking multiple times because he has to be seeing things. But, nope, it’s still you—looking like that, wearing that. “Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck.” 

Your brothers are beginning to call his name, demanding his attendance, and he froze in shock, unable to tear his stare away from the girl who’s tripped over her own feet more times than he can count; the wallflower who spends all her time studying in her room; the forbidden fruit who’s innocent has always stirred a vigilant feeling inside him—now stirring something hard between his thighs because there you are. 

Like always, your hair is done prettily, wispy-lashed eyes big and inviting, a saucy pout to your glossed lips. Your flawless complexion seems to glow in the reflection of the mirror, and he doesn’t know if it’s because of the warm lighting, or if it’s the confidence you exude in your faux-innocent expression from where something so sinfully sexy. 

Three photos, and every single one is like a punch in the gut; displaying your usually hoodie-hidden figure in its bare, exquisite form. The skimpy white two-piece caresses your breasts in a lace halter top, leaving a teasing amount of cleavage. Your navel exposed, he becomes aware of how soft your skin would be. Moving lower, your untouched flower is wrapped in a thin thong with a bow on the center of the waistband. 

A million things flit through his head; a million disgusting things he never thought he’d think about you. 

The main one is every sort of attraction these snapshots arouse. A laser slices down his center and sears him to the core. The multiple poses calls every hungry part of him to attention, the curve of your breasts, the contours of your hips and the jut of your ass. And he shoves to the darkest recess in his mind because that’s just an innate reaction to lingerie. (Right? Right.)

He combats your images with that of Val: knows-what-she’s-doing and equally promiscuous as him Val. The anthropology major who downs beers within seconds and tongue kisses the first person she sees afterwards. 

The next is the one he focuses on, that you would take these and send them to him—as if he’d betray your brothers like that. Second-hand embarrassment strikes him because he knows if you’ll send something as risky as this, he’ll have to formally reject you and break your unreciprocated pining heart. 

He grimaces at the thought. This is why he doesn’t do virgins and the less experienced in general. The inherent strings are a killer, and he resents the drama; and it’d be ten times worse with you because of the added complications of your siblings. 

In fact, he hears something beyond him, coming down the hallway, and it’s probably them, but he can’t stop rereading your text accompanying the photos, partially imagining how it’d sound in your delicate voice: 

bambi (4:21PM): is this as pretty as you imagined? did i do good? just tell me what you want, and ill do it. i want you. soon, please - and yes, ill beg. i promise itll sound even better in person. 

[read it in its entirety on my patreon - one time fee of $5 to access!]

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #441

“all alone, he turns to stone while holding his breath after death  /  terrified of what’s inside, to save his life he crawls like a worm from a bird”

Have you ever watched a movie in class/school that made you cry? Yep, a few. What’s the earliest you could go to bed at night and feel okay about? If I'm having a really bad day, I can tolerate as early as 7:00. :x What is you favorite type of lunch meat? Honey ham, probably. What time of the year do you dislike the most? Summer is disgusting. It's too hot, too humid, too many bugs, and I just hate it. Do you put ketchup on your scrambled eggs? No, that sounds gross. What is your favorite color to wear? b l a c k Are you an overachiever? Oh, hunny. What physical feature do you wish you had (i.e. freckles, curly hair)? Maybe uhhhh big eyes. What fictional character (i.e. Bambi, Scarlette O'hara) would you marry? Darkiplier bc he is merely a misunderstood soft boi. How long have you gone without shaving (girls- legs, armpits; boys- faces)? Legs: It's been nearly a year. Pits: not that long, considering I shave them every time I get in the shower. What is the meanest thing you have ever said to someone else? I'm sure it would be something in one of the letters I sent Jason. Or Dad. Idk. Did you ever go through a phase where you wrote bad poetry? The phase never ended lmao. What is your favorite thing about your life? My loved ones. Save all the animals that die during road kill or save 1 human from a fire? Sorry, but I'm picking the animals. Have you ever painted a picture of somebody? Yes. How many real bfs/gfs have you had? Two. Did you enjoy your past relationships? Yes. Except for when I was with Tyler. Name a comedy that you like. White Chicks. Could you wait until marriage for sex? Yeah. What’s the best Nirvana song? I'm not sure, really... Maybe "Drain You?" What was the last thing that impressed you? No clue. When was the last time you were in a pet store? Several months ago when I went in to get more rats for Venus. What nationality is your last name? Irish. What’s your favorite kind of chips and dip? Plain, rippled Lays in French onion dip. Who was the last boy that you saw cry? I don't know, actually. It may have been Sara's dad, which was years ago. Does your mom know you do surveys? I mean no, it's not like it's come up in conversation. Have you ever had a serious injury? When I was a kid, there was this one time I was running down the road with my friend, and I tripped; I was a fast runner, so I skinned the everliving FUCK out of my knees to the point there was even pus. I was SOBBING, and it took weeks to heal; I had the scars for years. What was the last thing you achieved? Losing weight at the gymmmm. Staying dedicated to going. Would you enjoy being famous? No. I couldn't take all the eyes on me and even ONE person's negative judgment. What’s under your bed? A big box of my art supplies. Do you enjoy travelling? Yeah. I wish I could do it more. Have you ever belonged to a club? If so, what was it? No. When was the last time you drank strawberry milk? Not since I first tried it at elementary school. It was absolutely disgusting. Have you ever managed to collect all the fast food toys in a set? I doubt it. Do you have a clock in your room? No. Did you have a good driver’s ED teacher? No. If I'd listened to him while driving, I could've gotten myself killed while merging onto the highway. People are assholes and didn't want to move over. Which of Britney Spears’ songs is your favorite? Probably "Freakshow." Does mind over matter work for you? Not usually, no. Are you paranoid? Oh yes. What is the best thing about winter? Everything!!! Literally the only BAD thing about winter is the dry skin/lips. I love the cold, Christmas and all that comes with it, the decor, hot chocolate, snow, getting all cuddly... Everything. :') Have you ever been truly in love? Absolutely. Are you currently planning a trip? No. A trip to Illinois is just a wish right now. How many plants are in your home? None, I think? What is your favorite possession? Excluding my pets (because I don't like calling them "possessions"), probably my laptop. Have you ever felt like you were too nice and way too often overlooked? I have before, yes. What movies have tripped you out? Off the top of my head, the only entertainment media in general that has ever truly "tripped me out" was the first time I played the Silent Hill game. The movie didn't affect me to that level because I already understood the concept. When I watched Jason play it for the first time, I was SO confused and just blown away by the concept that I did loads of research and just thinking about it all. That franchise is just cool as shit, okay. Did you rollerblade as a kid? Do you still rollerblade? I LOVED rollerblading. I haven't done it in years, though. Would you ever settle into a relationship that wasn’t right for you? Do you know friends who are in relationships just so they have someone to sleep with at night? NO. I will NOT settle. Being genuinely in love with my partner is too important to me for me to ever do so. I don't know if any of my friends are in that situation. Would you take a dirty picture of yourself for someone you are dating? With my current body? FUCK no. If I was happy with my body, the answer is still probably no. I'm too self-conscious and awkward with that kind of stuff, and besides, I really don't think I want a picture like that to exist of myself to avoid potential trouble. Do you use earplugs or a sleeping mask when you sleep? No. What summertime treats do you love? We have this local slushy place that is FUCKING BOMB. It may sound basic, but they have SUCH a vast variety of flavors and goodies you can top it with that it's truly just so amazing. How picky are you when it comes to choosing who to kiss or not kiss? I am VERY picky. I have to be really interested in you. Save for how things were with Tyler... I just felt like I was supposed to. What do you hate most about moving? I. Hate. The process. Of moving. It is just so, so stressful to me. I have a very hard time confronting big tasks, and that's exactly what packing and unpacking entails. Do you feel that having sex anywhere but a bed is more exciting? Not necessarily. Do you drink 5 hour energy drinks or any other kinds of energy drinks? No. Has anyone ever whistled at you? I don't think so. Do you like scarves? No. Is your father homophobic? Possibly. I don't actually know. I honestly don't think he took Sara's and my relationship seriously, so that may be a sign. Do you take gummy vitamins? The only vitamin I take now is vitamin D, which isn't a gummy. Have you ever applied make-up on a guy, for any reason at all? Ha, yeah. I gave Jason a makeover once. Who would you like to meet before you die? MARK. I am so determined, alsdjfkaj;wek;rj. I just want to hug him and say thank you and ugly-cry. If your dream was to be a model, and a big opportunity came up, but you had to be nude, would you take it? No. Even if I had the body of a model. What’s the most ridiculous conspiracy theory you’ve ever heard of? The fuckin' flat earth theory, probably. If Heaven and Hell exists, where you going when you die? Well, considering I have an, uh, very negative opinion of the Christian god... Who is the person that you are afraid of losing, above everyone else? My mom. The day she passes is a day I am inexplicably horrified of. What is one thing that pisses you off pretty much everyday? My life. If there anyone you know that you feel should consider therapy? My mom really could use it. Do you like any of the songs on Twilight, or the actual movie/saga itself? I love "Supermassive Black Hole" by Muse, but idk if it was actually written for the movie. How old was the first person you kissed? He was 18 when we first kissed. Will you be a strict parent one day? I never want to be a parent. If I hypothetically became one, I don't think I'd be strict, necessarily, but very protective. Last person to stand up for you? Probably Mom, idk. Have you been to a baby shower? Yeah, a few. Who were you with the last time you went to the movie theater? My dad. What’s your favorite high school memory? Just... a lot with Jason. Do you like relationships, or do you prefer to be single? I prefer being in a (healthy) relationship, but I won't get into one just for the sake of having one. What is one adventurous thing you’d be willing to do? Hmmm... scuba-dive, maybe? What subject at school did you absolutely hate? Math. Italian food or Chinese food? Italian. I don't really like (most) Chinese food. Do you like to make flash cards when you study? I rarely did that. Has anyone ever told you that you’re a good singer? Yes, somehow. Do you ever watch TED talks, live or online? No. I dare you to write the name of a person you strongly dislike. Ashley. What do you think about Marilyn Manson? He's one of my favorite musical artists, but he's a disgusting dick personally. Biggest trouble you’ve ever gotten into at school? Nothing, really. I was a very well-behaved kid. Do you own one of those “professional” DSLR cameras? Yeah, I have a Canon. Does it bother you when you see a 6th grader with a bunch of gadgets? No. Did you buy yearbooks every year in high school, or did you not bother? Not every year, but most. Do you have Restless Legs Syndrome? No. Jalapeños: yay or nay? I loooove them. Did you ever play Minecraft? Nah. My niece is getting into it. Did you ever have a Club Penguin account? Were you a member? I did have one. I wasn't one of those premium members or anything like that; I just had a basic account. Do you know anyone that seems to not have any common sense? Bitch me. It's extremely embarrassing. I 100% got it from my dad. What do you think is the biggest injustice that was ever done to you? The manner through which Jason broke up with me. It left me traumatized. What type of person angers you the most? Abusive people that think only they matter and have no consideration for how their actions affect other people. If you could change your appearance, how would you alter it? I'd lose a shitload of weight, for one. My teeth would be whiter, my eyes bigger and bluer, I'd want my hair colored/able to hold color far better, I'd lighten and lessen my body hair, make my skin clearer, thin my eyebrows... I'd change a lot. What are your feelings on feminism? MANDATORY. Absolutely necessary in a misogynistic society. However, I do believe some people take it way too far to a point it is anti-man and puts women on a holy pedestal. It is about equality. Describe your first relationship? Perfect, until it wasn't. Describe your last relationship? Wonderful and healthy, but distance and our health were issues at the time. Can you honestly say that you always practice safe sex? My history with sex is confusing and complicated and I really don't know. Why do you think your most favorite film touches you so deeply? Thinking about it... it's probably because of how Simba runs from his problems and bad memories, but returns to confront them and is victorious. That's how I want to be. What do you want people you meet for the first time to think about you? That I'm nice and clearly sincerely cared about them and their feelings. Do you feel protective over someone? My sisters, nieces and nephews, Sara... What perfume/cologne do you wear? It's called "Blush." Where did your vehicle come from? I don't have my own, but Mom's came from a girl at the dance studio. She ran into a deer, and the front got fucked up, but the sweetheart paid to fix it up to being operable so Mom had her own car. The front bumper is kept intact with zip ties and duct tape, but hey... it works and has for many, many years now, lol. What was the color of the bridesmaid dresses of the last wedding you went to? Ummmm... I actually don't remember. What is your favorite way to eat chicken? As tenders, probably. It is your birthday. You hope the cake is: Red velvet. This year for my bday, our controlling-as-fuck family friend bought me my birthday cake without consulting ANYBODY, and I was so fucking annoyed. It was a very kind gesture, yes, but um, can I have a say, please? What do you wear to bed? Usually men's pj pants and a tank top. What were you doing at 8pm last night? Sleeping, actually. I was extremely tired and went to bed early.

[lightsupinthenorth]

Lend me your love

Read on AO3

Billy loves having his hair played with. When he was a child, his mother used to ruffle his hair in passing, or caress it when he was watching TV with his head on her lap. After she leaves, no one but himself or the occasional hairdresser touches his hair for a while. Not until Max comes along and wants to practice her braiding skills on Billy. He protests, at first, telling her to practice on herself instead of pestering him, but he ends up surrendering, as he has wanted to since she first asked.

 He would never admit to her that he likes it when she styles his hair, but he can at least admit it to himself. He’s not in denial. He doesn’t even care when she tries something extravagant that ends up making him looks stupid, because by the time she’s done he’s always relaxed and somewhat absent.

 -

 Once they move to Hawkins, Indiana, their relationship has deteriorated so much that Max never asks him to be her guinea pig anymore. As pathetic as it sounds, Billy’s pretty sad about it.

 In Hawkins, to appease Neil after what happened in California (that is to say, Neil finding Billy making out with a boy), Billy flirts with a lot of girls. He even takes some of them to bed. They don’t do much for him sexually, but sometimes, when he eats a girl out, her fingers grip his hair as she’s looking for something to hold onto. Billy likes that. He likes it so much that it nearly makes him stay afterwards, in the hope she will caress his curls as they lay in bed together. But Billy can’t do that. He doesn’t really want to, anyway: he’s just touch-starved.

 -

 After he finally grows some balls and apologizes to Steve for the fight at the Byers’, they become closer. Billy sometimes wishes he’d never apologized because, with him, Steve brings questions, questions about the bruises and scars adorning Billy’s body, questions that Billy always deflects.

 Steve also makes Billy want him even more than he used to before they started being friends. One day, during the summer, after Billy has had to sleep under the stars because of his father, Steve sees a leaf tangled in Billy’s curls and takes it off himself. For a second, Steve’s long fingers are in his hair and Billy nearly faints. Once they’re gone, far too soon, Billy wants them back more than anything, but it’s not like he can just ask for it. He’ll just have to make do with the reminiscence of that brief touch. It’s all he’ll ever have.

 -

 After Starcourt, Billy’s body is so messed up he can barely wash his hair on his own. Raising his arms hurts like a bitch. He tries to power through it, but he’s fed up after barely a week. He’s got to do something about it. He’s not happy, but he’s got no other choice.

 He goes to Steve, whom he now lives with, and hands a hair clipper.

 Steve takes it and looks back and forth from Billy to the clipper with his big Bambi eyes.

 “What are you giving me that for?”

 “I want you to shave my hair.”

 Billy would do it himself, but he’d better not take that thing anywhere near his head if he doesn’t want it to end in a catastrophe.

 Steve’s speechless for at least ten seconds, mouth agape.

 “What? But, why? I though you loved your dumb mullet.”

 Billy sighs. He doesn’t feel like explaining himself, but Steve probably won’t do what Billy asked if he doesn’t answer.

 “I can’t wash my hair properly ‘cause my arms are fucked up. It would be easier if I just had it shaved.”

 “But… but that’s… are you sure you won’t regret it?”

 Steve is now staring at the clipper as if it had personally offended him.

 “I don’t know… I don’t have much choice, anyway.” Billy shrugs.

 “Well… I could wash your hair for you, if you wanted…”

 Steve looks up at Billy tentatively, and then looks down almost immediately.

 Billy would say yes in a heartbeat if he didn’t already feel like a burden to Steve.

 “Thanks for the offer… but you’ve done enough for me as it is.”

 “I really wouldn’t mind, I swear… I don’t feel comfortable participating in the murder of your hair, to be honest.”

 Billy ponders Steve’s proposition a while longer, biting his lip, before finally accepting. Steve beams at him.

 “Great! Do you want them washed right now?”

 “Ugh… if you’re free. If not, whenever is fine.”

 “Now’s good.”

 Billy understands very quickly that he has not thought this through at all. As soon as they enter the bathroom, and Steve asks: “how do you want to do this?”, Billy knows he’s fucked.

 Filled with dread, he stares at their tiny shower.  

 “Don’t know…”

 “You can just stand in the shower and let me take care of the rest.” Steve said.

  “Should I… uh… take my clothes off or… ?”

 “Whatever you’re more comfortable with.”

 Billy hesitated. He used to show off his body at every occasion and Steve has seen him naked countless times in the locker room after basketball practice when they were in high school. His body doesn’t exactly look the same as it did back then, however.

 Steve knows that, though. He’s seen Billy’s freakish scars already. He probably doesn’t care whether Billy’s body looks good or not. Steve is straight, after all. Plus, Billy doesn’t feel like dealing with his wet clothes after his shower, so he might as well undress. It’s going to be fine. At least, he probably won’t get hard in front of Steve, which might be the only benefit from his meds killing his libido.

 His yearning is still as strong as ever though, so Billy is far from safe.

 Steve turns the shower on and Billy tenses up as the water comes in contact with his skin.

 “Is it too hot?”

 “Yeah, a bit.”

 “I’m sorry… I take my showers really hot, so I couldn’t tell.”

 “’s fine.” Billy mumbles.

 He’s been possessed by a monster who hated warmth. He wishes he could take his showers as hot as Steve’s.

 Steve wets Billy’s hair carefully before turning the shower off and grabbing Billy’s shampoo. Steve’s hands are in his hair before Billy can brace himself. He shudders under their touch and his whole body goes pliant. He can barely stay on his feet and ends up needing to support himself on the tiled wall in front of him.

 “Are you okay, man?” Steve asked, stopping his movements.

 “Yeah… just tired.” He lies.

 “Do you need to sit down or something?”

 “No, no, it’s okay. Keep going.”

 Steve resumes washing Billy’s hair and then rinses. Then, Billy’s left to deal with the rest of his shower on his own. Thankfully.

 Like clockwork, Steve goes with Billy to the bathroom every three days to wash his hair for him. Billy feels gradually better, and his doses of meds get smaller and smaller, until he’s entirely off some of them.  However, Billy doesn’t tell Steve he’s able to raise his arms again. He would answer honestly if Steve asked him. But that’s the thing: Steve doesn’t ask. He keeps helping without complaining, and Billy’s too weak to admit he’s fine when he’s not been prompted to. He wants to wring every last drop of joy out of this situation until Steve catches on and puts his gentle hands away from Billy’s hair forever.

 It could have lasted a lot longer, if Billy had not given himself away like a dumbass. In his defense, it’s too early for reflection when it happens.

 Billy has just woken up and finds Steve rummaging through one of their kitchen drawers.

 “What the hell are you doing, Pretty boy?”

 “I can’t find the whisk.”

 “That’s because it’s not in there.” Billy says, as he reaches for it.

 He could have simply told Steve it was on the top shelf over the stove, but no. He had to get it himself, because he hasn’t had his first cup of coffee yet and is therefore deprived of his ability to think for even a second.

 He notices Steve starting at him and freezes mid-reach, but it serves no purpose except further highlighting he can now raise his arms pretty high. Higher than he would need to wash his hair properly.

 “Here you go!” He all but throws the whisk at Steve before retreating from the kitchen, kissing his coffee and his breakfast goodbye. Escaping is now his priority.

 He avoids Steve all day long, so he’s definitely perplexed when he is waiting for him in front of the bathroom door the next morning.

 “What are you doing here?” He asks before his brain can tell his big fat mouth to stay shut.

 “Well… helping you with your hair, as usual…” Steve replies, staring intently at Billy.

 “But…”

 “I know.” Steve interrupts him before he can say something stupid once more.  

 Billy is at a loss. What is Steve playing at? Why does he want to indulge Billy? Is it pity? Does he… actually like washing Billy’s hair? Why?  

 Whatever the reason is, Billy is not enough of a fool to ask. In fact, he doesn’t say anything, undressing in silence and hopping into the shower cubicle.

 With Steve so close, and his hands touching him, it quickly becomes clear to Billy that his libido has chosen that day to make a comeback. He does everything he can so that it does not become clear to Steve, in addition to himself: he tries to focus on the least sexy images he’s able to conjure, but he can still feel himself getting hard. His dick has refused to get hard for months, and now it won’t stay down no matter how badly Billy needs it to. His own dick is betraying him. How sad is that?

 Steve is now in the cubicle with him, his chest so close to Billy’s back that his now soaked t-shirt brushes against him. There’s no way he hasn’t noticed.

 “Do you…” Steve clears his throat, but his voice still sounds strained, “do you want me to lend you a hand with that too?”

 Billy opens his eyes right in time to see Steve’s slide down his chest and stop right above his crotch. They should talk about it, clear the air before doing anything, but Billy can’t bring himself to turn down Steve’s offer.

 He can only whisper “please” in between two labored breaths. When Steve takes him in hand and starts stroking him, Billy’s knees buckle under the onslaught of pleasure, and he has to lean against Steve’s chest, which makes his hard-on rest against Billy’s ass.

 “Fuck, Steve.”

 Billy grinds against him, pulling a moan from deep inside Steve’s chest. He can feel the vibration of it go through his own body.

 “God, you’re so hot.”

 Billy isn’t sure he agrees, but he’s in no position to protest. He’s on the verge of coming already. He wishes he could hold on a little longer, but he hasn’t been touched in ages and the fact that Steve is the one touching him is not helping him stave off his orgasm.

 “Steve”, he groans, “I… I’m gonna…”

 He can’t even finish his sentence. His voice has failed him.

 “I’ve got you” Steve assures.

 That’s what sends Billy over the edge. He comes hard over Steve’s hand and his own chest. The still running water cleans it off in a heartbeat. As soon as Steve lets go of Billy, he turns around and kisses him.

 He doesn’t know if kisses are on the table of their tacit agreement, but he’s going to find out. It turns out that they are indeed on the table, according to the way Steve kisses back eagerly and winds his hands in Billy’s wet locks.

 They have to separate when Billy peels Steve’s t-shirt off him and passes it over his head. After throwing the piece of clothes carelessly on the bathroom floor, instead of putting his lips back on Steve’s, Billy starts trailing kisses down Steve’s neck and chest. He stops on his way to give some attention to Steve’s nipples, delighted to note that they’re sensitive enough to get Steve panting in no time at all.

 Steve’s hands are already back in Billy’s hair, and Billy’s living for it. He keeps going down, down, down. Slowly. Until he reaches the elastic band of Steve’s old gym shorts which have been converted to pajamas. He pulls them down swiftly and takes Steve is his mouth, reveling in the gasp it gets him to make. He would have loved teasing Steve some more, but he’s been wanting this for too long. Billy looks up as he slides down Steve’s cock. Steve is staring, seemingly in awe, his brown eyes nearly black with arousal and his lips slightly parted. The sight, added to the weight and taste of the dick in his mouth, nearly gets Billy hard again. It would surely have if his cock had not just recovered from all the meds.

 Surprisingly, it does manage to harden again a few minutes later. Billy doesn’t really have the time to analyze the situation, he just feels a spike of arousal when Steve pulls hard on his hair. A choked moan leaves his throat, half from surprise and half from pleasure, as he’s hauled off Steve’s dick. Then, Steve is coming all over him, nearly silent apart from his raspy breathing. Once again, the water, which is now uncomfortably cold, does its job and washes the mess off.

 “Fuck, I’m so sorry.” Steve apologizes, his voice shot to hell as if he were the one who had just had a cock down his throat. “I wanted to warn you I was going to come but I was literally rendered speechless”.

 He’s now gently massaging Billy’s abused scalp and Billy closes his eyes to enjoy the feeling.

 “It’s fine”, he assures after a while, as Steve helps him up.

 In fact, it’s more than fine. The hair pulling really got Billy going. He can’t believe he’s only discovering this. He’s known he likes his hair being played with for as long as he can remember, but he had no idea getting it pulled could feel that good. Well, until now that is.

 He can’t wait to explore that, preferably with Steve.

[potatotrash0]

I am not familiar with these ocs??? Care to introduce us?? :D

Between you and me anon, I am also not familiar with them skdbskxbskxbksvx I’ve had most of them for years now but I’m basically remaking them haha. Most of them don’t even have permanent names, but I’ll introduce you to them anyway!!

First up, Aya! She’s the captain of the college’s volleyball team! Basically a himbo lady kdfjkshd very nice, very buff, very impulsive. She’s not dumb she just lacks self control. She’s Vee’s older sister and lives in her own apartment, but she drops by the dorms a lot since Brary’s her tutor and lives there. Also sometimes she pops by to make sure her sister’s doing alright. Oh, she’s the oldest too. In her last year of college. She can and will adopt basically every loner kid she sees if they’ll let her.

Vee’s her younger sis and is in her first year, as are Crim and Mae. She’s not sporty, but I imagine she probably did something else like ice skating or gymnastics. Just for fun. Aya’s the one doing it competitively. They’re both pretty sociable but Vee’s more likely to be in a sort of group. A little blunt sometimes but she means well!!! Very emotional, she probably cries over Disney movies. Bambi made her bawl her eyes out.

Crim is probably the most intimidating but she’s a big softie don’t let her black and red closet fool you. She doesn’t actually realize sometimes that she’s scary, she gets pretty confused when she learns that Vee was a little scared of her when they first met. She’s really nice if you get to know her, even if she’s not all that talkative. She’s got hearing aids, hunting for a long time without ear protection wasn’t the smartest decision in hindsight. Whenever she goes without them, she switches between ASL and just writing using a notepad.

Brary’s my newest OC! She works at the campus library and tutors Aya. Their dynamic is basically just “cool smart collected A and their sunshine dumbass B” skfjksbdk. Brary loves her stupid gf very very much even if she’s a headache. She’d die for her. Brary’s also in her fourth year, a political science major. Yes she’s the only one with a major because I haven’t figured out everyone else yet shush

Mae, my beloved...........she’s such a fucking bitch dkcbskbckshc. I mean that fully affectionately but she is very mean. Well. Maybe more just intensely sarcastic and maybe she has just a touch of a superiority complex but she’s not bad I swear fkdjkshdkdhd. She does have a soft spot for one (1) person I just thought of right now but other than that she is Full Sass. She and Crim do not get along uh.

And that’s just about everyone in this universe! do have more OCs, just not in this particular world. Lunai and Rhyael are off in their DND world, and Logan and Paris kinda exist in a vacuum. I’m not sure where they are tbh they just kinda vibe wherever skjdksjxkd.

As a quick rundown of the dnds and one offs: Lunai is a moon elf cleric! She’s very sweet, a little naive but she’s pretty much the brains between her and Rhyael. Rhy’s a human sorcerer, draconic bloodline. Impulsive little bastard. Can, has, and will rush into battle for the adrenaline rush even if they’re not prepared for it. Their backstory is locked until you get to friendship level 20 <3

Logan.......has no backstory dkfbksbckd. He just has a vague role as a little shit and a skateboarder who jams to bass. Paris also has no story, they just waver in and out of my various daydreams occasionally. I just know he’s genderfluid and flirty and that’s it aha ;;;;;

[atomic-taco-muffin]

The Lost Princess Chapter 16

Warnings: Fluff/angst

Rating: SFW

In a dark chapel, Maleficent and Hades stand around a table. Hades sighs as Maleficent faces away from them. 

“That smarmy vizier could’ve had 'em--if someone had stuck around to give him a hand,” Hades said. He looked over at Riku, who glanced back at him with narrowed eyes.

“Hey, I did my part. I brought the princess and the spirit, didn’t I?” he said. 

“Jafar was beyond help, consumed by his own hatred. One should beware of letting it burn too fiercely,” Maleficent said. 

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Lighten up. I’m as cool as they come, okay? By the way, kid, have we got something special for you,” Hades said. 

“Huh?” Riku asked as he looked toward Maleficent. 

“We had a deal, yes? You help us, and we grant you your wish...” she said. An image of Kairi appeared on the table. 

“Kairi!” Riku said. 

“Go to her. Your vessel is waiting,” Maleficent said. 

“But what about (Y/N)? What’s gonna happen to her?” 

“You’ll find out soon enough. Now go.” A man walked in wearing pirate’s robes and a large feathered cap. He held up a hook for a hand, smirking. 

“Just remember, this is no pleasure cruise. It won’t be a pleasant voyage,” he said. 

“Why are you doing all this for me? What’s the catch?” Riku asked Maleficent. She bent down to him, placing a hand on his cheek.

“Silly, boy. You’re like a son to me. I only want you to be happy,” she said. He knocked her hand away. 

“I seriously doubt that,” he said. 

“Believe what you wish. But lest we forget, I kept my end of the bargain.” He stared at her before walking towards the pirate. Back in Agrabah, Sora spoke to Aladdin. 

“Here. Take this with you,” Aladdin said as he handed Sora a keychain. 

“Sora, please find Jasmine for me,” he said. Sora and the others returned to the gummi ship. 

“Could this torn page be from Merlin’s book?” Sora asked. 

“Let’s return to town and give it to him,” Goofy said. They returned to Merlin’s Study and Sora entered the 100 Acre Wood. He found a tall, curious tree buzzing with bees. 

“Hello, i-is anyone there?” someone asked. From inside a log nearby, a small piglet walked out, looking around nervously. 

“Wh-Wh-What am I to do? I’m all alone. Pooh? Pooh? Where are you? It’s me, Piglet.” He turned around and a shadow creeped over him. He looked up to see Sora towering over him and ran away behind the tree. He peeked out from its trunk, checking to see if Sora was gone. Sora sneaked up behind him and he stood frozen in place, completely terrified. 

“Oh dear! I was j-just... N-Never mind. I’m sorry!” Piglet said. Piglet closed his eyes and Sora knelt down to his level. 

“Don’t be scared. You’re looking for Pooh, right?” Sora said. 

“You know Pooh?” He sighed with relief. 

“Oh, y-you see, I-I have something for him. I have to take it to Pooh right away!” he said. He turned, seeing Winnie the Pooh walking towards the tree. 

“Oh, Pooh!” Piglet called. He ran to meet the bear, who begins sniffing the air, smiling. 

“Oh, I believe I smell a delicious something—a something like honey!” Pooh said. 

“Pooh!” Piglet said. Piglet met him in front of the tree.

“Hello, Piglet. How have you been?” Pooh said. 

“Oh, I-I’m so glad to see you. I thought you’d gone away. I brought wh-what you asked for.” He gave Pooh a blue balloon.

“Thank you, Piglet. Now I can finally have some honey,” Pooh said. 

“Really? B-But how?” Piglet asked. 

“I shall hold on to the balloon, and fly like a bee up the Hunny Tree, see.” 

“But if you take their honey, won’t the bees be angry?” 

“Hmm...” He stares at the balloon, thinking. 

“Oh!” he said. Sora walked over to them. 

“Oh hello, Sora. Where’s (Y/N)?” Pooh said. 

“I’m afraid that she’s been kidnapped. I don’t know by who though,” Sora said. 

“Oh bother. If you could only chase away those bees, I’m quite certain I could get a small morsel of honey. Would you help me get some honey?” Pooh said, changing the subject. 

“Sure!” Sora said. Owl landed on a branch above them. 

“Oh. Hello there, Owl,” Pooh said. 

“Good day, Pooh. What are you doing? Using a balloon to get some honey? Splendid idea! Allow me to offer a few pointers,” Owl said. He flew to a higher branch. 

“Ahem! Now, Pooh can get honey by floating up this tree with his balloon. The honey is inside the tree hollows, not the beehives you see here.” He flew to an even higher branch. 

“There’s quite a lot of honey in these holes. If Pooh gets too close, the bees will come out to protect their honey. If they get to Pooh, they’ll pop his balloon. Lock onto the bees and swat them away. The more time Pooh has at each hollow, the more honey he can eat. There’s more honey higher up, too. If jumping from branch to branch proves difficult, try the Rush command. Rush can help you catch up to Pooh quickly. But it isn’t fully reliable. Good luck.” Sora helped toss Pooh into the air and he floated up the tree, gathering honey. Sora swatted away the bees that attacked, letting Pooh enjoy his meal. Pooh grabbed handfuls of honey in his mouth from inside the tree. 

“It is rather funny what I will do for honey,” Pooh giggled. Sora left the 100 Acre Wood with a summon gem in hand. He gave it to the Fairy Godmother.

“Oh, another summon gem? Let’s help this little one. Here we go! Bibbidi-bobbidi-boo!” she said. Sora was granted the power to summon Bambi. 

“If you find any more of these stones, bring them to me. And I’m sorry about (Y/N). You’ll find her. I know you will. She has a strong heart,” she said. 

“Thank you,” Sora said. They left Traverse Town and flew the gummi ship to the next world. 

[waejinyoung]

Can’t Swim - EP . 8

Can’t Swim 8

word count: 3.2k+

a/n: you might be questioning where I have been for the past couple of months. I have one word to say that should be a good enough answer. College. I’ve been studying none stop and found no time to write the next episode after university started. The posts will no longer be regular so just keep yourselves updated. Hopefully I will have another 2 episodes up between now and the end of the year at least but don’t quote me on that. I hope you enjoy! 

I’m deeply sorry for my absence again x

warnings: nothing

EP . 1 , EP . 2 , EP . 3 , EP . 4 , EP . 5 , EP . 6 , EP . 7 , EP . 8 , EP . 9

THIRD PERSON POV

The afternoon continued with Y/N and Jinyoung discussing life and getting to know one another whilst Y/N replied to her emails.

“It’s mind b-boggling how you and J-Jackson may have crossed paths back in 2012…” Y/N had just mentioned how she was training for the London 2012 Olympics to compete for swimming.

“Similar to Jackson, I switched career paths and decided to study architecture. Dad wasn’t the biggest fan until he saw the passion and success I had gained in the industry. He soon came to terms with everything.”

“Wow… do you r-regret it at all?” The clock marked 10:30 pm. You guys had been talking for the past 90 mins, getting to know each other.

“I think I regretted not swimming after deciding to study architecture. I didn’t choose to not compete in the Olympics because I no longer liked swimming so I do regret not continuing although I must say, studying architecture might be the most time consuming degree out there. That’s why later on I decided to apply to become a licensed swimming teacher to undergo lessons. I’d be teaching people how to swim whilst fulfilling my love for swimming.”

“Best of both w-worlds, r-right?”

“Exactly.” Y/N had now placed all her work to aside with her back against the wall, legs crossed enveloped into the conversation.

Some seconds went by and Y/N wanted to know about Jinyoung’s initial dreams.

“What about you? Did you always want to be a singer?”

“Always. I took up d-dance lessons when I was around 15. Then went to a-audition and got in to JYPE. That was when I met J-Jaebeom. We actually d-debuted together as a d-duo group called JJProject to later on d-debut with the r-rest of the g-guys as GOT7. Since t-then they’ve been my f-family rather than just my m-members. I think it’s g-getting to the p-point where I might have spent m-more years of my l-life with them then I did without. Time flies…”

“I could definitely sense the brotherly love you guys all have for each other. So how did becoming an actor happen?”

“I r-requested from the c-company to find roles I could take part in a couple years b-back. First it was small roles in small d-dramas and then being c-casted by more known d-directors to p-play bigger roles. All of that has l-led me to play s-second male lead for ‘When My Love Blooms’.”

“When do the episodes start airing?” Y/N had grown eager about Jinyoung’s talents.

“Hold your h-horses… we haven’t e-even started f-filming yet and won’t be until I r-recover… The original airing d-dates will probably be p-pushed f-further.” Jinyoung’s words drifted into a sudden realisation for his career.

“If only-“ Y/N was about to blame herself again.

“We’ve been through this m-multiple times Y/N. None of this is your f-fault so s-stop blaming yourself for t-things you have no c-control over.”

Y/N had her mouth open ready to retaliate but if she had to be honest… she couldn’t be bothered to fight back considering it was now coming up to 11:00 pm.

“Fine.” Y/N yawned and covered her mouth. Work had been extremely busy today especially with all the news floating around now.

“S-someone’s tired.” Jinyoung eyed Y/N’s tired state and decided to call it a night.

“I still have so much to do. I can’t fall asleep now.”

“C-could you n-not spare an e-early n-night just for t-today?” Y/N recollected her thoughts weighing up if she could possibly sleep early tonight and get all the work done tomorrow.

“I could…”

“Problem s-solved then. Clear up your b-bed and get your pjs on. I d-don’t want to f-face a t-tired Y/N tomorrow m-morning.” Y/N eyed your mean comment and huffed to your orders.

“Yes, sir.”

2 WEEKS LATER

Y/N’s POV

“Miss, Jinyoung has been recovering quicker than expected. He should be perfectly fine to attend the event. If anything unsettling happens you can give me a direct phone call.”

“Thank you so much Doc.” You gave the doctor a large smile and she reciprocated a reassuring smile.

You entered Jinyoung’s room with your outfit for the architecture awards festival along with you.

“Am I allowed to come?” Jinyoung asked as soon as you entered the room. You gave him a nod.

Jinyoung’s voice was more or less back to 100% and his eye had completed healed by the end of last week. There wasn’t much left until being fully recovered. Possibly parting from the hospital quicker than the original 2 months the doctor had estimated.

“I knew I’d get the green light. I even prepared my outfit because I was so sure I’d be able to come.” You hadn’t seen someone so ecstatic for an awards festival.

“As expected… I’m not even surprised. Will you be able to get dressed? Need any of my help?” Jinyoung was still a little instable since he’s been lying in bed for the past 2 weeks. His legs tend to give out for the first 30 mins.

“I think I can manage. I’ll get dressed quickly and then the bathroom is all yours.” You chuckled at his assumption that you’ll take really long in the bathroom for the event.

Jinyoung heads towards the bathroom and you are left there practising a speech you’ve written for all the awards you and your company have been nominated. This isn’t because you knew you were going to win any of them but… the unprofessional scenes if you guys were to win an award and to not have a speech ready daunted you. There was nothing wrong with being prepared.

15 MINUTES LATER

You must say… I don’t think you had ever laid eyes on someone so handsome in your life before. You could swear that this man was carved by God himself.

“How much deeper are you going to fall into my looks?” You hadn’t realised but you had been staring Jinyoung up and down for the past 30 seconds of him leaving the bathroom. Hair all styled. The suit was literally made for him. His cute bow tie was a little wonky leading you to let out a chuckle.

“What?” Jinyoung’s face turned serious thinking something was wrong with how he looked.

“Your bowtie is wonky.” You stood up from your seat and reached out to fix his bowtie. Your eyes were fixated in straightening the bowtie and all Jinyoung could do was analyse your face and how focussed you were.

“There you go. Looks better now.” You lightly let go off the tie and looked up at Jinyoung who was already staring right back at you. Those bambi eyes were going to be the death of you.

“Thank you. Now go and get yourself ready.” He pinched your nose and then you entered the bathroom with your dress, makeup bag and accessories.

20 MINUTES LATER

“Jinyoung~~” You called out for Jinyoung. You were done with everything but couldn’t reach the zipper on the back of your dress. You had been procrastinating on what to do and just gave up. There’s no way you could zip the dress up alone.

“Yes, Y/N. Is everything alright?” You could hear his footsteps come closer to the bathroom door.

“In a bit of sticky situation… could I ask you to do a favour?”

“Sure, what is it?” You went ahead and unlocked the door for him. He took a step back and couldn’t contain the sight in front of him. You were in a red bandeau strapless dress which had a structured skirt that was shorter at the front and longer at the back with. A very slight trail. Unsurprisingly your makeup was the bare minimum and you had left your natural hair out. His mouth was agape as you stepped out of the bathroom.

“How much longer are you going to stare for Mr Park?” He had been in the same awe you was when he had stepped out of the bathroom earlier on.

“Yes…right… the favour?” His soul re-entered his body trying to compose himself. You could only smile on the effect you had on the prince himself.

“I can’t reach my zipper, could you zip up the back of my dress for me?” You saw his cheeks blush a light pink below the thin layer of bb cream he had on. Without the zip done neither of you were going anywhere so he had to do it.

He wasn’t able to give a verbal response and just nodded. You turned around to have your back facing Jinyoung. He moved your hair to aside exposing half of your back to him. He was blushing so hard right now and was happy to have you facing away from him even though in a matter of seconds you’d be facing him seeing the shades of red planted on his cheeks. Jinyoung gently placed one hand on the zipper and the other hand on your back holding the fabric of your dress still. His fingers grazed your skin and they were a little cold leading you to jolt a little by the surprising cool touch. He notices.

“Did I hurt you?” His voice was a little worried. The slightest worrying reaction you make, and he’s so concerned. He’s too sweet.

“Nope, your hands are just a little cold that’s all.” You say whilst you chuckle.

He apologises with his soothing voice and zips up the dress, letting out a quiet done when finished.

You turn back round and thank him for his kind gesture. You also noticed the flush of his cheeks. He’s so cute, you thought. You quickly put your heels on and left Jinyoung’s patient room and entered the hall of the hospital. Expectedly, you guys received some stares and some whistles by the old women sitting outside their patient rooms. The event manager had organised a limousine to pick up each nominee for the awards hence why there was a lovely jet black limousine parked at the entrance of the hospital. The driver spotted you two and guided you the way and kept the door open for you two to enter the fancy vehicle. He ran back to the wheel and started driving towards the venue.

“Anything I need to know beforehand? Who should I present myself as?” Jinyoung had started with the questions during the car drive.

“Who’d you like to present yourself as Jinyoung?” You wanted to fish out his intentions from him.

“Preferably your boyfriend in order to stop those punks from hitting on you but I’d never want to force you into a relationship with me…” He side eyed you as he kept looking out the window. You so wanted him to be your boyfriend.

“Logical. Agreed. If anyone asks, you’re my boyfriend.”

“What an honour.” You slap his thigh due to his sarcastic tone.

“Whatttt? I’m serious. I’m going to be the boyfriend of an amazingly talented architect who’s bound to receive an award tonight. It’s a genuine privilege.” You could only look at him in awe as he described the so called ‘privilege’ he was taking part of.

“If you say so…”

The humming noise from the motor of the limousine was really calming but Jinyoung broke the silence once again.

“Are you nervous?” His tone was much deeper and serious compared to how he was a second ago.

“A little. These awards happen once a year and we’ve progressed so much as a company but so has everyone else in the industry. It’s hard to tell if we’ll be receiving the major validation from the institute. With or without the award tonight I’m so pleased with my company, but it would be nice to get a recognisable achievement for all our hard work.” Jinyoung listened to you as you let out your insecurities for the upcoming night.

“In the little amount of time I’ve met you, I think you’re the only person who deserves all the awards you’ve been nominated for this year. No one can change my thoughts and it’s going to be a pleasure to witness your achievement first hand. I can’t wait.” He rubbed his thumb over your knuckles trying to calm your nerves down. It was going to be a long night.

30 MINUTES LATER

Your limousine had rocked up to the red carpet laid out on the floor outside of the venue of the awards. You took a deep breath as the driver ran around to Jinyoung’s side of the limousine to let him out. Jinyoung agreed to open your door for you so he exited the vehicle first. Like he had planned, he went around to your side and opened the door for you to step out. The cameras started capturing every single moment as you wrapped your arm around Jinyoungs, and he gave you a reassuring nod. You gave him a smile and the two of you walked towards the entrance of the building slowly as you waved to the cameras and press greeting the two of you. The cameras were close to blinding, but you pulled through until reaching the entrance where the bodyguard escorted the two of you to your spaces in the main hall.

The building was full of white and gold decorations. You could definitely tell that the theme was highly influenced by Greek culture. The budget of the awards keep growing as the number of sponsors increase. The bodyguard escorted you to the table that Beck was already sat at with his fiancé. Beck realised your presence as well as Jinyoung. He stood up to give you a hug and shook Jinyoung’s hand. Beck’s fiancé shook both of your hands too and took your seats.

“The famous Mr Park. It’s nice to meet you in person. I’m Beck, the other shareholder.” Beck gave Jinyoung a warm smile.

“It’s nice to meet you to Beck. It seems like you already know of my name, but I’ll reiterate for the norm. My name is Park Jinyoung, you can call me just Jinyoung.” You let out a scoff because of how formal Jinyoung was being with Beck.

“He’s younger than you so you can ignore the formalities.” You said to Jinyoung and then Beck and him opened the conversation about age and their Chinese zodiac signs.

The evening began at 7:30 pm with the award winners due to be announced at 9:00 pm. Until then there was butterflies in your stomach ready to be set free any minute now.

Jinyoung came closer to your ear and whispered, “Loosen up a little. There’s no need to be this tense. Here hold my hand.”

Jinyoung offered his hand and you took it immediately as he gestured his open palm. Your hands were tiny compared to his manly hands. They encompassed all your digits giving you’re a sigh of relief because of the security they exerted. You let out a large sigh and continued with the discussions on your table with the new clients that were interested in your company. Having Jinyoung at the event really helped scare away the useless men who would only be interested in your physique and nothing more. His presence filtered out all the nonsense that would usually be taking place at the table.

The clock finally struck 9:00 pm and everyone went back to their designated seats in order for the awards to be presented. The event holder went through all the minor rookie awards to then move onto the company categories.

“Here are the nominees for Best Project of the Year.” The event holder signalled to the larger screen behind him as the nominees including your company are mentioned in no specific order.

“I was personally really fond of this project myself too. The meaning behind the design and the immense detail put into the façade really makes me excited for the future of this company. I’ll stop blabbing on and open the envelope.” You looked at Beck and then back at Jinyoung who was really eager to know the result.

“The award for Best Project of the Year goes to…” The event holder lifts the flap of the envelope and takes out the white sheet of paper inside. You hold your breath waiting for the result to be spoken.

“The Chamberlain project, designed and constructed by Chevrel Architects.” The whole community around your table started roaring and cheering for you and Beck to claim the award. That was one award written down in the books for Chevrel Architects, a company you and Beck had started years back. You and Beck had decided that if this award was given to you guys then he’d give the speech for it. Beck was the reason for the Chamberlain project happening and hands down you could state it was because of him the project turned out well. You, Jinyoung and everyone else in the hall stood up clapping as Beck walked up to the stage and shook hands with the event holder along with receiving the award. He then walked up to the mic and started his speech.

“I’d like to first start off with a large thank you to everyone at Chevrel Architects. The amount of hard work that was put into the Chamberlain project is indescribable, without everyone’s help it wouldn’t have been possible to achieve such a great outcome. I’d like to also thank Y/N for coming on this journey with me and trusting in me when I said that this company will create its own legacy. This is only the beginning…” Beck continued to thank more or less everyone he knew and came to an end with another roaring applause by everyone.

He jogged back to your table and you admired the award he placed on the table. You felt Jinyoung squeeze your hand in encouragement for you to realise how much you guys are capable of although he still knew you were a little iffy because the individual architect awards hadn’t been announced yet. You couldn’t help but smile at the gleaming object right before your eyes. Having received this award you doubted that another award would be given to someone of the same company.

Minutes went by and the event holder had reached the most awaited award of the night. Architect of the Year. You were surprised that you hadn’t left to use the restroom to throw up all this anxiety already. You were so ready to go home and relax. You wanted your normal heart rate back. You looked at Jinyoung and he gave you a look that melted your heart in seconds. He started massaging your knuckles with his thumb again and you could feel your body ease into his touch. The event holder for the last time of the night directs our attention to the screen for the listing of the nominees. Beck unfortunately wasn’t nominated so he was rooting for you to win the award.

“I know for many of you this is probably the most important part of the night. I’d like to first mention that to be able to be nominated for this award is ana achievement in itself so, you architects should all be proud of yourselves. It was a very hard decision that the committee made but we were able to make a decision. The award for Architect of the Year goes to…”

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I think it was mean of me to have ended this episode here, but it is 2:30 am right now as I write this episode. I hope you guys liked this episode. I shall be back somewhat soon so make sure to come back to check if an episode has been uploaded. Like always let me know your opinions on the story line and check out the other episodes if you haven’t. It would be nice to get some feedback :)

See you next time

writer-nim x