#she does not know these people and as soon as the bomb is out of her head should go home

[serandipity]

"That's fine. You've already given me more than enough. I can go one day without conditioner," She said softly. Luckily, the man didn't seem to keen on wanting to use her for anything or holding her out burst last night over her hair. If she had been staying somewhere fancier things would have played out far differently.

Hylia should at the very least make the effort to compensate this man for his hospitality. She had taken up space in his home and now he was going to fix her car for her? It was probably more kindness than she deserved at this point.

The notice of the broken shower and the threadbare towels were noted. Looked like this man could use the extra money she was about to give him. Well, at least the money was going to the right places this time and would be used for more than just frivolities.

Regardless, the shower did feel nice, even if she could get little more than luke warm water. It was enough. She could take a hot jet bath when she got home. Sometimes roughing it wasn't so bad though.

Although if she asked Faron, Faron would hardly call this ''roughing it''. She was just spoiled.

Stepping out of the shower she rang her hair dry and put her clothes back on from yesterday. All her actual items were locked in her car, so she'd have to change later. Hylia was lucky she didn't end up being sick last night.

Ugh.

Her phone pinged to life. A text from her soon to be ex-husband. He had something to tell her and wanted to call her. Truthfully, Hylia didn't want to deal with whatever nuclear bomb was about to be released on her personal life so she simply ignored it for the time being.

By the time she got out the mechanic had stepped out to look at her car, or maybe other people's cars? Who knows. If he was the only mechanic in town then everyone would have to come to him along with whatever passing tourists drifted through town. He must have been making good money, but he seemed to live modestly. The state of his home and belongings gave that much away.

She stepped out to meet him, a little more awake than before the shower, the tinge of oil and gas and brake fluid hung in the air.

"So, does being the only mechanic in town pay well enough? I don't think I ever caught your name either."

She was offering an explanation for everything she had vented about the night before, but the explanation just felt a bit unneeded on the heels of everything he had been told the night before.

"Yeah... I already figured that much out." Lucas' tone was idle; he didn't want to act like he was holding it over her head, but if she didn't remember everything she had told him then maybe it would be best to remind her. Just a little, at least.

She seemed willing to take him up on the offer of a shower, and he nodded before getting up. "Alright. Give me a sec to grab you some towels. You gotta twist the nob before you turn it on too, or else you're gonna get nothing but ice-water." There was a joke he had heard at some point where there was nothing that made you feel more confused or more of an idiot than trying to work someone else's shower. In his situation, it wasn't helped by the fact that his shower was broken, and he was just dragging his heels on hiring a plumber to fix it.

Lucas laughed a little when she finally relented and offer to pay him. "Don't worry about it. I wasn't workin' last night; that's why it would've cost you so much. But my shop opens this morning. I'm not gonna overcharge you."

Two towels. clean if not a bit threadbare in some spots.

"There's shampoo by the tub, but uh... I can't say I have any conditioner."

[horsechestnut]

Being a Cissie King-Jones fan is so funny because she's probably the only superhero in existence where her fans actively root for her to not be in things.

[neferaskingdom]

♡ Max "If It Weren't For The Baby" Verstappen | MV1

NEFERASKINGDOM

Summary: Max and George show no signs of stopping anytime soon and poor y/n is stuck between a rock and a hard place. but soon things escalate when Max accidentally opens his big mouth.

PREVIOUS | MASTERLIST | NEXT

y/n_russell posted:

y/n_russell: Habibi come to Abu Dhabi✨

Comments:

user: SHE’S BACK, EVERYBODY STAY CALM!!! 🔥🔥🔥 user: MOTHER RETURNED TO THE GRID AND IT SHOWS. user: Abu Dhabi isn’t ready for her!! 😍 user: Not to be messy, but is that a bump or just the angle? 👀

user: Delete this before you embarrass yourself further. 🙄 user: You do realize that’s body-shaming, right? Yikes. user: Maybe it’s just the dress, maybe it’s none of our business. Either way—don’t. user: Imagine logging onto the internet just to get ratio’d in the comments. Couldn’t be me.

georgerussell63: Wow. 2 whole photo in front of Lewis’s garage? Feeling betrayed right now.

y/n_russell: omg george, do you want me to write "george is my favorite" on my forehead or something? relax. georgerussell63: I’m just saying, where’s the support? y/n_russell: maybe if your garage didn’t feel like the waiting room at a dentist’s office, I’d consider it. georgerussell63: That’s because we’re professional. y/n_russell: nah, it’s because you have the personality of unseasoned chicken. user: 💀💀💀 SHE CAME FOR HIS LIFE.

user: MAX. LIKED. WHAT DOES THIS MEAN.

user: Not Max creeping in the shadows like that. George, sweetie, you seeing this? user: Netflix doesn’t even need to make a script this season. The show’s writing itself.

landonorris: MOTHER.

y/n_russell: 🔪🔪🔪 user: The knives are out. Lando, RUN.

lewishamilton: Always great to have you around. Thanks for showing up and supporting me this weekend. Much love ❤️

y/n_russell: Wouldn’t miss it for the world, you know I’m rooting for you Lew! Big things ahead 💪🏽

f1teaspill posted:

f1teaspill: Okay, F1 fans, we’ve got a hot one for you! Max Verstappen and George Russell’s sister, Y/n, were spotted on a hotel balcony together, and it’s seriously got people talking. 👀 Y/n was supposed to be at a totally different hotel with George, so why is she with Max—especially with all the drama going down between them? 🤔

Is there something going on between these two? Or is Y/n just making it clear that she’s Team Max in this ongoing feud? You know we’ll be watching this one unfold closely... 🔥

Comments:

user: Yooo, what’s going on here?! Y/n is in Max’s hotel?? 😳

user: Is this a secret relationship or is Y/n just picking sides? I need answers!! 😬

user: So Y/n's team Max now? This is messy. 👀

user: Max and Y/n are lowkey dating and no one’s telling us?! I need the receipts ASAP. 😩🔥

user: Sis really out here with Max?? I can’t believe this. George is gonna flip. 😬

user: Okay, but like... is she betraying George by cozying up with Max right now? Or is she just done with the drama? 👀

user: Nah, this can’t be real. She’s out here looking all comfy with Max while George is literally her brother?? What kind of betrayal is this? 😱

user: Is this the kind of power move we’re witnessing?? Y/n dropping George for Max?? 🤯💥

user: Ok, but lowkey, I ship them so hard. Max and Y/n would make the hottest couple. 🔥🔥

user: No, fr. Max and Y/n are EVERYTHING. They look so good together, I’m lowkey obsessed. 😍👀 user: Can we just take a minute to appreciate how they’re literally radiating chemistry? I don’t care if they’re not dating—they should be. 😩💅

user: The way she’s just chilling with Max tho... George must be somewhere crying right now. 🤣💀

f1teaspill posted:

f1teaspill: “If it weren’t for the baby.” Three words that sent the paddock and the internet into absolute mayham today after Max Verstappen dropped the bomb during an interview. 👶💣

Fans are already in detective mode, dissecting every second of this wild moment. Whose baby? Is Max a secret dad? And what does George Russell have anything to do with it?

Interview Transcript:

Journalist: Max, earlier this week George Russell referred to you as a “bully” in his recent comments. Do you have any thoughts on that?

Max: (chuckles awkwardly) Well, you know, George always has something to say. I’m not going to get into it.

Journalist: But do you think his characterization of you is fair?

Max: (sighs) Look, I’m just here to race. I’m not interested in petty drama.

Journalist: It doesn’t seem like George is letting it go anytime soon. Are you planning to address it with him directly?

Max: (visibly annoyed) I really don’t see the point in—

Journalist: But isn’t it important to clear the air, especially since the tension is so public now?

Max: (snapping) If it weren’t for the baby, I wouldn’t even bother trying to make peace with him!

(A beat of stunned silence. Max’s eyes widen in realization.)

Journalist: The… baby? What baby? Max, can you clarify—

(Max mutters something under his breath and walks off, leaving the journalist baffled.)

Comments:

user: BABY???? HELLO? MAX, EXPLAIN YOURSELF.

user: What baby, Max?! WHOSE BABY?! I haven’t been this confused since Abu Dhabi 2021.

user: Can someone please check if Max even knows what he said? He looked so panicked when he walked off.

user: “If it weren’t for the baby”??? Sir, we’re not in Panem; calm down.

user: Peeta Verstappen has entered the chat. Someone hand him a loaf of bread. user: Peeta Mellark walked so Max Verstappen could run user: I just KNOW someone’s editing Max into a Peeta scene as we speak. Can’t wait.

user: Okay but what baby would involve George? George is childless?

user: Guys, hear me out: What if Max is secretly dating George’s sister? That’s the ONLY way a baby ties them together. user: Nah, there’s no way. George would’ve punched Max into next week already. user: Okay but think about it. Max. George’s sister. A baby. Uncle George. THIS IS LORE. user: I’m just saying, George’s sister has been looking very glow-y lately… 👀 user: Not a theory, just facts: Max is babytrapping George into a truce. 💀 user: Wait... isn’t George’s sister in Abu Dhabi right now?? 👀 user: omg and they were seen together on his hotel balcony jskjsk user: I’M SCREAMING. THIS THEORY IS TOO GOOD. user: Max... the man, the myth, the secret brother-in-law.

user: F1 fandom today: trying to figure out if Max has a secret family or if we’re all just collectively hallucinating.

user: Bro, if this is true, Netflix better dedicate a whole episode to Uncle George. user: “If it weren’t for the baby” is my villain origin story now.

user: GUYS. What if Max meant baby as in, like, his cat or something? We’re spiraling.

user: Okay but why would George care about Max’s cat?! Use your brain. user: Honestly, the only thing that makes sense is Max dating George’s sister. Uncle George confirmed. Case closed.

user: Y’all, the way I will actually SCREAM if Max and George’s sister are together. This is better than any race drama.

user: Max Verstappen?? A baby daddy?? In THIS economy??

user: Everyone’s fighting over the baby, but I’m just here wondering how Christian Horner is gonna spin this in interviews.

user: Plot twist: The baby is Christian Horner’s with Toto 😭

user: STOP. This is the most chaotic F1 season ever, and I love it.

Taglist: @ilovechickenwings @spooky-librarian-ghost @diaryofarandomkid @rd14 @hc-dutch @tremendousstarlighttragedy @grussellsprout @dannyespinosa06 @awritingtree @shelbyteller @diorbrxtz @96mcobo

[degenerateworm]

Could i request some Yandere Captain curly headcanons? Pre and post crash if you'd be willing :3.

I would love to, anon! Let's see here...

---

Captain Curly is a kind man. Constantly thinking of others, how to help them and how to make them happy. A real people pleaser.

So it makes sense when you join the crew of the Tulpar that he would be friendly and welcoming to someone as new to ship life as you!

Curly gives you that kind smile that crinkles his eyes, and you almost instantly trust him. How could you not, when he's your new captain? And while he's being so understanding of your knowledge, or lack thereof, of crew life?

He'll try to worm his way into your mind, doing whatever he can to help you feel comfortable.

You need an extra pillow because the Pony Express beds are too uncomfortable? Here, take his! He doesn't use it much anyway.

Having a hard time adapting to the sub par food that the Tulpar can provide? You'll find a bag of sweeteners tucked under your covers next time you go to bed. Shhh, nobody else needs to know!

Curly does all of this to get into your heart, to make you comfortable around him. Don't get him wrong, he wants to do these things regardless! But there is a rather big ulterior motive; getting to you.

---

Curly asks to take your wellness check tests, and Anya teases a little that he might have a crush on you. She doesn't know the half of it!

You make his heart pound when you're near, his face quickly flushing and an easy smile reaching the corners of his lips.

He finds that he doesn't mind the tedious labour while you're around, doesn't mind that he's rather stuck on the top rung of this ladder he's found himself on.

As long as Curly can have you by his side, he feels he could go through anything and he could get out the other end.

---

Of course, this leads him to commit rather unsavoury activities.

Curly likes to wake up at awful times in the morning, half of them deliberate and half of them accidental from the nightmares he suffers from.

He makes his way to your dorm, slipping through the door easily due to the lack of locks.

Curly doesn't do anything bad in his mind. He just sits by your bed, sometimes on it, his hand resting on your cheek, shoulder, or whatever skin he can feel.

You're so warm, and soft. You're here, beside him. It's grounding.

Curly likes to watch you sleep, feel the life in your body. It comforts him a lot, and soon he has to retreat back to his dorm due to his eyelids closing from sleepiness.

He doesn't mind when you interact with the others, but he becomes quite prickly and stern when you talk with Swansea or Jimmy, or even Daisuke.

Quickly steering you away or interrupting your conversation to give you a task to focus on.

It's not that he doesn't want you to talk to him, their his friends too! He just... Gets this awful feeling in his gut, whenever you smile or laugh with them instead of him.

---

Curly despises the feelings of jealousy and anger that rise inside of him when you interact with others positively.

He's a slightly lucid yandere, and realises that these feelings are unhealthy if he forces them upon you.

So that's why he covers it up with sweetness and kindness, to practically love bomb you into preferring his company over others.

If you choose him, he won't have to be awful to the others, right? Curly would hate for them to feel bad.

But he'd hate to lose you worse.

---

Thanks anon! I only did pre crash Curly for this one, because I feel like both would be a bit too much writing for me right now. You can ask for post crash Curly though, if this hasn't satisfied you! And thanks again!

[racew1nn3rs]

─ 𝘚𝘌𝘊𝘙𝘌𝘛𝘚, 𝘚𝘌𝘊𝘙𝘌𝘛𝘚 🫀

max verstappen x singer!fem reader // smau

⤷ summary: when max verstappen starts commenting on the posts of the beloved singer y/n l/n, fans are confused and less than enthusiastic at the new friendship. what they could never expect is just how long they've been 'friends'...

based on this request <3

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liked by sabrinacarpenter, maxverstappen1, and 46,908 others

tagged sabrinacarpenter

ynusername my new album is now officially out on all platforms! thank you so so much for all of the love and support, and special thanks to sab for her feature on the song <33 love u bb girl 🫦🫦 now that the album's out, tour next!!! see you all soon!

23,560 comments

user1 THE ALBUM OUT. THIS IS NOT A DRILL PEOPLE THIS IS NOT A DRILL.

user2 i cannot be normal about this i fear

user3 ik her back hurts from CARRYING the music industry on her back 😩

user4 hey so WHO TF IS SO AMERICAN ABOUT?? A LOVE SONG

user5 y/n writing a love song in god's year of 2024... wow

user6 y/n in the top 10 charts, fork found in kitchen

user7 sabrina and y/n are never beating the gf allegations

ynusername damn right we're not 😏

user7 HOLY SHIR HOKY SHIT HOKST SHUT

user8 y/n's in love and it's not with me, hanging myself as we speak

user9 the comment is gonna get reported but so real op

user8 can't a woman hang herself in peace 😣

user10 album's such a banger i had this shit bumpin at my grandmas funeral 🙏🏼 rest in piece nancy 🕊️💪🏻

user11 OH MY GOD???

user12 rest in piece nancy you would've loved make you mine 😔

ynusername oh my god please tell me your joking

user10 sorry queen the grind never stops

ynusername NO SHOT

maxverstappen1 great album! 👍🏼

user13 why does he text like my father 🧍🏻‍♀️

user14 brother eughh

user15 what da hell is a polar bear doin in arlington texas

ynusername thank you max!!!

user16 y/n l/n to redbull in 2025

user17 hellurrrrr who is this man in ur likes y/n

user18 f1 driver!!

user17 Y/N NO ATHELETES PLEAEJEWK 🫵

user18 tour content soon??? i'm sat

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user19 bro looks like he snuck onto earth, get his ass outta here

user20 grammy-award winner, vogue cover model, new york university graduate and Some Fucking Guy

user21 not y'all coming to her defense like the mighty morphin power rangers 💀💀 he's literally a world class athete and she writes pop music

user20 17.172.224.47

user21 IS THAT MY IP ADDRESS??

user20 melinda charleton

user22 IS THAT HIS MOTHER'S NAME!!?1?1!

user20 you want me to do you too???

user22 no we good 😃

user23 ruth bader ginsberg did not die for this

user24 now wtf does this have to do with babe ruth 🤨

user25 WHOOOOO 😧

user24 ... that wasn't right was it

user26 now let's be fr he does NAWT have a chance

user27 have u seen the marble-carved  goddesses these men pull, i fear he does 😔

user28 please no i feel ill

user29 TWO???? OH HELL NAW

user30 two might be pushing it, only one was confirmed

user31 jesus christ

user32 first taylor, now this

user33 yall, all he commented was great album 💀💀 yall are LEAPING to conclusions

user34 what can i say it's an art

user35 i do not see 👁️👄👁️

user36 no like 💀💀 im in your walls

user37 haha max verstappen!! right!!! (theres a sniper at ur location)

user38 omg ur so right 🤩 it is about him (i have a bomb strapped to my chest)

user39 i dont mean to sound stupid, idk who that man is, if i saw him on the streets i wouldnt know a thing 🥱

user40 this is so random too like what 😭

user41 the power of kindness won't work here, i have to throw him off a building

user42 i used to be a max verslsjjwwo lover 🤩 now im just a max verslsjjwwo hater 😔

user43 NURSE 🫵 SHE'S OUT AGAIN

user44 why would u put that into the universe 😧

user45 alright, lets get you to bed grandma

user46 mari stop being delusion and go touch grass 🧍🏻‍♀️

user47 ENOUGHHHH

user48 ain't no way in hell 😭

user49 ik ur feet hurt from all this jumping to conclusions babe

user50 lets leave the parkour to the athletes 😃

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liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris, and 54,789 others

ynusername italy thanks for letting me be inside you (; it was such a lovely show, expect me back asap!!!!

15,267 comments

user51 IT WAS SO GOOD I THNK I BLACKED OUT THE WHOLE TIME THO

user52 oh!

user51 oh so now this isn't a safe space

user53 LANDO AND MAX IN TGE LIKES??? NO NO NO NO

user54 ABORT ABORT ABORT

user55 y'all are doing too much 🙄 she's one of the top artists in the world, i think it's safe to say they might like her music

user56 the second picture 🧎🏻‍♀️do you need a stool cause i can kneel and be really quiet

user57 y/n fans be normal challenge (impossible!!!) (never done before)

user56 WOMP WOMP

maxverstappen1 wonderful show! 🙏🏼 you are so talented

ynusername ty max (: im glad you could come see me

user57 ain't NO WAYYYYYY

user59 THIS IS SIXKENJNG IM GONNA PUKE

sabrinacarpenter my gf looking sexy 🫦🫦🫦

ynusername only for u bbg 🧎🏻‍♀️🧎🏻‍♀️🧎🏻‍♀️

user60 BOOOO 🗣️ GET A ROOM

user61 do y'all need a third!!!!

user62 mamma mia pizza pasta mozzerella moment

user63 i just put u on a watchlist

user62 🧍🏻‍♀️

landonorris RAHHHHHH 🦅🫵🗣️‼️

ynusername RAHHH RAHHH RAHHH RISE POWER POWER 💪🏻‼️

user63 what the fuck

user64 OH GOD WHAT IF SHES DATING HIM????

ynusername brother eughhhh

landonorris WHAT THE FUCK????

user65 SINCE WHEN IS SHE FRIENDS WITH F1 DRIVERS HOW MANY CHAPTWRS DID I MISS

user66 apparently we all went into a universal coma while she was out galavanting cause idk how else this could've happened

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maxverstappen1 posted to his story!

(caption: beautiful show)

22,456 replies

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user67 someone save my girl bro, she don't know any better 😭

user68 it's like a little kid trying to touch the hot stove, LIKE STOP THAT!! DON'T DO THAT

user69 am i the only one who thinks they'd be cute together....

user70 YES!?!?

user71 there is literally no fucking way he bagged her

user72 losing y/n to european f1 driver would be the biggest american tragedy since 2001

user73 i had to read this shit twice, op what r u waffling abt 🫵😧

user74 can't even be nonchalant about this one bro, i'm chalanting hard asf

user75 we do not care

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liked by redbullracing, f1, and 78,567 others

tagged maxverstappen1

ynusername first time in monaco, safe to say i enjoyed myself! so happy to see you shine this time my love<3

25,788 comments

user76 oh. my. fucking. god

user77 THEYRE FUCKING DATING OH MYFODNSJ

user78 THAT SHOULD BE MEEEE HOLDING YOUR HAND THAT SHOULD BE MEEE MAKING YOU LAUGHHH 🎤

user79 i'm in mourning

sabrinacarpenter CHEATER 🫵

ynusername BABY IT'S NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE, IT WAS JUST ONE TIME 😣😣😣 IT WAS A MISTAKE

maxverstappen1 we've been dating for 2 years??

sabrinacarpenter SHUT UP FAST & FURIOUS NO ONE ASKED YOU

user80 i'm sorry 😃 two Y EARS

user81 i feel like i just got dumped. y/n don't do this, the kids need you 😔

maxverstappen1 i got p1 for you, i love you 🫶🏼

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hope you all enjoyed! please let me know your thoughts and feel free to leave a request for me to write something for your fav <3

[evavertun]

could write an essay on the tragic irony of that scene (where mel is talking to jayce over Viktor who is dismantling jinx’s bomb) but like… in brief??

people are saying she’s being classist or ableist in leaving viktor out of the conversation and while that dimension to the power differential between them is definitely there (and I could write a whole lot on that too!) i just don’t think it’s the main reason why that conversation goes the way it does.

mel doesn’t speak to viktor because she is suggesting the goddamn militarisation of hextech. viktor is a principled scientist.

rewatch the scene closely. mel watches both jayce and viktor at first. while explaining the situation. while Viktor is dismantling the bomb, while giving the council’s opinion. but she stops engaging with viktor as soon as he asks her:

- V : “wait what are you suggesting?”

this is where she stops talking to him. because what she wants is the goddamn militarisation of hextech. to use on the undercity where viktor is from, no less. mel says straight up:

- M: “we should prepare our own countermeasures.”

it is right there. i don’t understand where the ‘manipulation’ conversation is coming in with this scene when she isn’t even attempting to speak around the violent measures she is willing to support. mel is being quite upfront about it. to me this was mel’s most ‘ambessa’ moment. it makes perfect narrative sense that in the episode following this one we meet ambessa and get to see mel’s relationship to martial law and Noxus’ kinds of state sanctioned violence that far exceed the brutality we have seen even piltover direct at zaun.

mel knows she cannot speak to viktor about this because… and i don’t know how many times I can say this… it’s a blunt proposal for the godamn militarisation of hextech.

of course she anticipates viktor’s reaction because she’s intelligent enough to know that his reaction is that of any principled scientist. before anyone can get a word in edgewise we see viktor immediately, vehemently trying to shut the idea down:

- V: “absolutely not. That is not what we created hextech for.”

jayce brings up heimerdinger here too and says he would never do it which is so telling. heimerdinger was a council member, yes, but he is first and foremost a scientist who adheres to science’s ethics and academic rigour (albeit to a pedantic degree because he has no real concept of human life spans).

in this scene viktor is rightfully much more pissed off at jayce. that he even considers the proposal is a testament to just how much more absorbed in mel’s world of state politics he has become as opposed to viktor’s one of science. after mel has left viktor scoffs and says:

- “Ridiculous. You cannot be considering this.[…] We’re scientists. Not soldiers. We agreed hextech is to improve lives not take them.”

a large part of what is so tragic about the machine herald storyline is that these tables have entirely turned. of the many, many mel and viktor parallels i think it’s often overlooked that it’s mel who becomes increasingly opposed to endorsing war and militarisation, ultimately killing her own mother, the symbolic figurehead of both, while it’s viktor who ends up creating the very thing he was insulted to even think of with hextech. an army that can’t die… used by ambessa no less.

[inpienoinks]

HOW STEB COMMUNICATES!

And... that's kinda it. A deep dive into how Steb communicates but I fight to stay on topic the longer you read.

NOTE: I gave this whole post a hazy and blurry zonked glance while muttering to myself before pressing post. There may be some spelling mistakes / incorrect wording.

Question by this person, but I was too lazy to make a separate post since I already had a draft similar to this question saved. I LOVE YOU CORACOOKIECRUMBLE!!! 😁😁😁😁⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️🗣🗣🗣🗣🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥💯💯💯

There aren't many scenes of Steb trying to communicate with someone, so it's difficult to say for sure how he communicates, but I think I have a pretty decent idea.

IN THE VIDEO BELOW

You see Steb with Maddie. This is the only scene really showing how they talk to one another, and the situtiain is tense, so it's hard to say how he communicates in more relaxed situations. In this scene, Steb communicates with her that he's ready by grunting, to which she understands.

IN THE GIF BELOW

Once again, in a tense situation, Steb makes some noise to communicate. This time, he speaks. Not only does he speak, but he also motions for everyone to follow him. With that being said, this proves that Steb CAN talk. He just doesn't want to.

This is not the only time Steb uses body language to communicate.

IN THE GIF BELOW

Steb cocks his head to the side, signaling to Maddie that they should go, as well as walking away with her once they're called.

IN THE TWO GIFS BELOW

Steb uses some hand and arm motions to signal to others. In the first one, he signals to Caitlyn to fall back, being that he had planted the bomb. In the second GIF, he signals for the enforces to turn off the beacons, since there didn't appear to be anyone coming to help fight.

IN THESE TWO GIFS BELOW

Steb grabs Mel to help her up, and in the second GIF, he grabs up the other guy to detain him. (I don't know if he has a name, and im too tired to look for one.)

Steb doesn't say anything prior to touching them, but the situations are also something to consider. Steb has his hands out to both of them, catching their attention just before actually putting his hands on them. Whether or not it's intentionally meant to be a signal, it's still something he does.

With these situations, it's hard to say EXACTLY how he is when using physical contact to communicate, but it'd say it isn't something he does often. He grabs Mel because it's an emergency, and he needs to make sure she's alright and out of there as soon as possible. He grabs the guy to detain him, following Caitlyn's orders and arresting him. Every time he touches someone (on screen), it's not really to communicate, and more so to assist / do his job.

CONCLUSION AND ANSWERS:

Is Steb mute?

No.

Is he selectively mute?

It seems most likely........? (Considering the information we have, at least.)

That being said, if he IS selectively mute, he may be open to speaking more frequently with someone close to him. Maybe even if it's just a little bit. (Short sentences, short answers, quiet speaking voice, murmuring, ect.) I can speak more on this at the end of this post for the people who wanna read about it.

Do I think he uses sign language? No. I really doubt it. He communicates both intentionally and unintentionally with small gestures, body language, and expression. He might use some type of hand signs occasionally? Not sign language itself, but just hand gestures that give you a vague idea of what he wants. For example, maybe you'll ask him why he's out somewhere, and he'll tug on the fabric of his enforcer uniform, signaling he's there for work. You'll ask why he's looking at you, and he'll point to his face as reference to your own, signaling that you have something on you and showing where it is.

Again, there's isn't enough Information to be 100% certain, but I feel like my conclusion is relatively sound.

Extra yap you were previously warned about:

I can talk more about selective mutism in another post for the people interested. Keep in mind, I'm NOT a professional. I'm autstic and I'm just nerdy about this. I don't wanna dump a whole bunch of information that is not at least 87% Steb related in this post, so I'm gonna say this next part like I'm one of those youtubers who has an audience of 5 year olds and makes those 3 am challenge videos cause it's funny.

GUYS, IF WE CAN GET AT LEAST FIVE PEOPLE TO COMMENT THAT THEY WANNA HEAR ABOUT SELECTIVE MUTISM IN ANOTHER POST, ILL MAKE A POST ABOUT SELECTIVE MUTISM AND HOW STEB WOULD MOST LIKELY BEHAVE OFF SCREEN IF HE HAS IT!! DONT FORGET TO SMASH THAT LIKE BUTTON, SUBSCRIBE, AND TURN ON THE NOTIFICATIONS BELL!!

I LOVE YOU STEB NATION!!! 🗣🗣🗣🔥🔥💯💯💯💯💯❗️❗️❗️❗️⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️🙏🙏🙏🙏

[luvergirl-866]

something like love

part - 4

pairing - paige bueckers x azzi fudd

word count - 5.3k

c/w - language, small amount of angst, some hurt/comfort. also kinda problematic paige but i get her

a/n - guess who’s endo cramps are killing her!! that’s right, me! fml. as usual this is unedited but i’ll come back to edit later! also, i changed paige’s step-dad’s name from tim to dean because i remembered that azzi’s dad is named tim and i felt like that would be confusing lol. also, thank you so much for all the fic recs i got! i’m so excited to start working on them :3

They’re ten minutes into the thirty-minute car ride and nobody has said a word. Country music is playing quietly over the radio, and Dean and Amy keep glancing at each other. But the awkward silence is deadly.

Nobody spoke earlier, either. After Paige dropped the bomb. It was silent for a good minute before Dean had coughed loudly and turned back to the car, getting wordlessly into the driver’s seat. Amy stared at them for another minute or so, giving them no clue as to what was going on in her head other than her ears, which rapidly turned bright red. Finally, she’d shook her head and said, “We will talk about this when we get home,” before following her husband into the car.

As soon as they were both out of hearing range, Paige had sagged, and Azzi’d looked over at her, concerned. Usually, she’d lay a hand on her arm but she wasn’t sure if Paige wanted to be touched, especially by her, so instead she’d said, “Remember, we can leave anytime.”

Paige had nodded stiffly. And then, without looking at Azzi, she’d gotten into the car as well, leaving the door open for Azzi to follow suit.

And now they’re on the road, Paige and Azzi sitting in the back seat like two little kids in trouble. Azzi wants to go on her phone to avoid the awkwardness but her parents raised her to be polite, no matter the circumstances, so here she sits, stiff and awkward while she rides in this car that smells new and fancy and she hates it.

Chancing a glance over, Azzi sees that Paige is still staring out the window, the same thing she’s been doing the whole car ride, and Azzi hates that, too, because Paige only ever gets quiet when she’s bone-tired or truly upset. And Paige got a pretty good nap on the plane.

Based off the way she acted to Azzi’s words before they got on the road, Azzi’s pretty sure she’s doing that thing where she shuts people out because she’s mad or on the verge of tears or thinking too hard. And when she does this she can get mean, because she’s trying to protect herself, and it comes out all wrong.

She’s always done this, been reluctant to open up about the hard stuff, shut out the people who care about her. She and Azzi have talked about it a lot. She once admitted that Azzi was the first person to get her to actually talk about her feelings. But despite Azzi’s way with Paige, and despite the fact that they just get each other in a way no one else ever has, they still have their flaws. Azzi still doesn’t always know the right thing to say. And Paige still gets mean.

This fact keeps Azzi glued to her seat, thinking sidling closer and trying to comfort her best friend would only end badly. Azzi acts like she has a tough skin but often, the things Paige says when she gets like this cut deep, and it ends with both of them hurt. She’s scared to add a fight between the two of them onto whatever will surely go on with Paige and her parents later. So she stays put, even though every bone in her body is telling her to make Paige better.

Azzi has only managed this for maybe five minutes when she glances over again and notices that this time, Paige’s hand is splayed over the middle seat, fingers tapping anxiously, almost like she’s subconsciously reaching over. And that sight alone is enough to get Azzi sliding over, moving Paige’s hand so she doesn’t sit on it. Dean looks at her through the rearview, but Azzi pretends not to notice.

Paige doesn’t look over when Azzi settles in beside her. But she does reach blindly for her hand before taking it and placing it in her own lap, playing with the fingers nervously. Azzi breathes in relief. Paige hasn’t rejected her outright—she can’t be too upset. At least not yet.

They sit like that for the remainder of the ride.

When they pull into the driveway, Paige gives Azzi’s hand a squeeze before subtly shaking herself out and exiting the car. Azzi follows, afraid to be alone with Paige’s parents for even a second.

Before Paige can close the door, Amy calls, “Bring your bags into your room, Paige. And when you’re done come down and talk to us in the kitchen.” There’s a weighted pause. “Alone.”

Paige doesn’t answer, just slams the door shut. Azzi winces.

Azzi doesn’t say anything while Paige opens the trunk, or when she starts aggressively pulling their things out, or even when she slams the trunk shut. No, Azzi keeps her mouth shut, wanting to allow her best friend to seethe in peace, but when Paige slams into her shoulder when she passes her, Azzi doesn’t want to let it slide. “Ow! Paige, what the fuck?”

“Get your bags,” Paige responds gruffly.

Okay, so it’s gonna be one of those times. Perfect.

Despite not wanting to, Azzi does as she’s told, gathering her bags and following Paige to the front porch. She tries not to think about how usually Paige would’ve carried her things for her.

Paige opens the door without a word and they walk inside. The house is nice, open, smells of cedarwood. Paige doesn’t give Azzi a chance to look around, though, instead walking briskly to the staircase, lugging her shit upstairs with impressive strength, and Azzi thanks God she’s in such good shape because she’s practically jogging by the time they arrive at a room at the end of the hall.

“Paige—“ Azzi starts to stay, but Paige cuts her off by throwing her own backpack off her shoulder and dropping her suitcases, as if she’s trying her hardest to make as much a ruckus as possible.

Azzi places her things much more nicely on her usual side of the bed, eyeing Paige cautiously the entire time. It’s the only reason she’s able to catch her before she leaves, anticipating her movements just like she does on the court and darting between her best friend and the door, blocking her.

For the first time in nearly an hour, Paige looks her in the eye, and there’s fire there. “Move, Azzi.”

“No.”

“God,” Paige sighs, “seriously, don’t piss me off. Get outta my way.”

“No, Paige,” Azzi repeats, keeping her feet planted.

Paige stares at her and then shakes her head. “Why are you being so fuckin’ annoying?”

“Don’t,” Azzi says, trying to stop her before she gets too fired up, but it’s already started.

“No, Azzi, you don’t,” Paige snaps. “I knew you were gonna get like this, do your fuckin’ peace and love shit that you think will solve everyone’s fucking problems.”

Azzi swallows hard. It’s been years since Paige went on a rampage like this, and she opens her mouth to stop her, but is quickly interrupted.

“It doesn’t solve anything, dawg. It actually makes shit worse, because it’s so motherfucking annoying having you acting like everything’s fine when you don’t even know.” Paige shakes her head, taking a step towards her. “And that’s the thing, is you really don’t know but you wanna pretend like you do. You don’t know what it’s like to have your mom fuckin’ leave you for some fuckass guy, for her to have new kids outta state and raise them to be hateful just like her. Just like him.”

At this point, Azzi has tears in her eyes, and she attempts desperately to swallow them down. “Did you forget that my dad fucking left me when I was a baby? I’ve never even fucking talked to him, Paige. He doesn’t want shit to do with me.”

“That’s not the same and you know it.” Paige sends her a withering glare, so different from the way she usually looks at Azzi. “You have Tim. You have your mom and your brothers and they all love you so fucking much.”

“You have your dad!” Azzi responds, throwing her hands in the air. “You have Drew, you have Alora!” A tear escapes, against her will, and she wipes it furiously away. “You have me, Paige,” she says, more quietly now. “I love you so fucking much. So you don’t get to take this shit out on me and say mean things to hurt my feelings. That’s not—it’s not fair.”

As soon as she sees the tears welling in Azzi’s eyes, Paige softens, her shoulders slumping, eyes turning on her with guilt rather than venom. “Az, don’t cry.”

For some reason, this makes Azzi more mad, and she turns away to face the door, always having hated crying in front of others. “Well if you say mean shit to me, I’m gonna cry, Paige,” she mumbles, though there’s not much fire to her weak, shaky tone.

“Hey, no, you’re right,” Paige reaches for Azzi’s shoulder, trying to turn her around, but the tears have started now and they’re not going to stop anytime soon so Azzi stays turned firmly away. “Azzi, I’m sorry, I didn’t—“ Paige cuts herself off on a sigh. Her hand falls off Azzi’s shoulder, and for a second Azzi thinks she’s going to walk away, but then a pair of arms wrap tenderly around her waist and Paige’s chin is wresting on her shoulder. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have—I was wrong for that, I shouldnt’ve said any of that shit.” When Azzi doesn’t respond, instead burying her face in her hands to try and hide what she’s sure is an ugly cry, Paige squeezes her tighter. “Azzi, please don’t cry, I’m really sorry. Fuck, I’m sorry, for real. I didn’t mean any of it, I was just so scared about my parents and I took it out on you, I fucked up.”

Azzi nods into her hands, taking a deep breath to try and stop the embarrassing flow of emotion. “I know, Paige,” she tries, but it comes out sort of as a whimper and this only makes Paige circle around to stand in front of her, full-on hugging her now, burying her face in her neck and rubbing her back soothingly.

They’re silent for another moment before Paige says, “I’m serious, Az. I didn’t mean any of it.”

Azzi knows this, fundamentally, but there’s still a part of her that sort of cracked at hearing her best friend tell her that she was annoying, that her efforts to help always fall flat. “You shouldn’t have said it, then,” she stutters, letting Paige hold her close even as her face doesn’t come out of its hiding spot.

“I know, I know, I shouldn’t have. You’re the only person who can ever make me feel better and I—fuck. Azzi, I’m sorry, I can’t believe—I never wanna hurt you.” Paige lifts her head out of her neck to nuzzle into Azzi’s hair, pressing a kiss to the spot just behind her ear. “Never wanna make you cry.” She plants another kiss there, and Azzi’s breath hitches. From the crying or from something else, she doesn’t know.

Sighing shakily, Azzi finally pulls her head out of her hands to look up at Paige, placing her hands at her chest almost as if she’s about to push her away. She’s sure her mascara is ruined by now but she can’t bring herself to care too much. “It really hurt when you shoved me outside, too.”

A pained expression flits over Paige’s face, and she nods, looking almost sick. “Fuck. I’m—I’m sorry, Azzi. I’m so sorry. Is your arm okay? Does it still hurt?”

Azzi can’t take the guilty look on Paige’s face and shakes her head no. It doesn’t seem to relieve much of anything.

Breathing deeply, Paige closes her eyes and then leans her forehead against Azzi’s, bringing her hands up from her waist to stroke over her tear-stained cheeks. “I’m sorry, baby,” she whispers, and Azzi’s knows that the nickname wasn’t a slip-up this time, wasn’t just a habit from their pretending. “I’m really fuckin’ sorry.”

And with that, Azzi isn’t mad anymore. Her feelings are still hurt and the things Paige said are still going to replay in her head for quite some time, but at least for now, Azzi just can’t be mad. Because Paige is going through something she could never imagine going through.

“I’m sorry, too,” Azzi breathes, and Paige rears back, but before she can protest, Azzi says, “about your parents. About this whole…situation.” She looks down at her hands on Paige’s chest, and, deciding she won’t be needing to push her away anymore, she slides them up to her shoulders. “It’s shitty and you’re right, I don’t know what it’s like to be in your position.” She shrugs, swallowing back the last couple tears that threaten to fall, trying to regain at least some of her composure. “I’m going to be here for you, okay? I always am.”

Paige nods. “I know you will.”

“And that means,” Azzi goes on, “you can’t do this again. You can’t take it out on me. You can’t push me away. Because that makes it really fucking hard for me to help you, and I want to help you.”

Paige nods again, more solemnly this time, moving her hands back to circle her waist. “Yeah, yeah, I know, and I’m so sorry for—“

Azzi holds a hand up to Paige’s lips, effectively shutting her up. “Okay, stop. I accept your apology, I promise. Just, show me you’re sorry and don’t do it again, yeah?”

“Yeah,” Paige says. “‘Course.”

“Good.” Breathing mostly even now, Azzi pulls Paige in for another hug.

With a heavy sigh, Paige hugs her back. “We’re in it together, hm? From now on, together.”

Azzi rests her cheek on Paige’s shoulder, the weight of her arms around her, the feeling of her skin and bones, so familiar. “Yeah. Together.”

Paige pulls back just enough to look at her, and when Azzi reciprocates, she’s uneasy to find that Paige is giving her that same new look. The perplexed, maybe enthralled?, almost worried look that has taken over her face more often than can be explained ever since the first time after their kiss. Azzi really wants to work out what it means.

But, as always, Paige corrects herself and it’s gone as fast as it arrived. “We’re good?”

Azzi nods, smiling softly despite herself. “Yeah, P. We’re good.”

—————————————

Paige has been downstairs with her parents for nearly an hour.

From what Azzi can hear from her spot at the top of the stairs, it doesn’t sound to be going too well. The three of them keep going from yelling to whisper-yelling to yelling again, and Azzi swears Amy has cried like five times at this point.

When Azzi hears Dean say, “We just don’t allow sinners in this house, Paige,” and Paige snap back, “Do not use God against me right now!” Azzi figures it might be time to intervene.

Trying to come up with something quickly, she pulls out her phone and dials Paige’s number. She hears Paige’s phone ring downstairs, and the three of them go quiet before Paige says, “Just—one second,” and then there’s a click on the other line and she’s answering. “Um, hi?”

“Pretend I’m your dad,” Azzi says, hoping she’s not on speaker.

“What?”

“Just pretend I’m your dad, Paige. Seriously.”

“Uh, okay.” The line gets a little muffled and Paige says, “It’s dad.” Azzi can hear both Amy and Dean let out audible groans downstairs.

“Okay, now tell them that I—your dad—am offering to fly you home.”

“I…wha—“ Azzi can tell Paige wants to argue but can’t with her parents right in front of her, so instead she sighs and the line goes muffled again. “He’s, um, he’s offering to fly me home.”

Azzi only has a second to hope and pray that Amy shares Paige’s competitive nature before Amy is saying, “What? You told him about this?”

“No,” Paige answers, “he just knows how you’re like now. And he wants Azzi and I to have a good summer, not a shitty one with shitty people.”

“If you want to go back to your dad’s, go,” Dean says, and Azzi’s heart sinks. Maybe this won’t work.

But then, bless her evil, horrible soul, Amy is stepping in. “No. Absolutely not. I will never hear the end of it if we send you to your father after inviting you over. We just…” Amy sighs, and Azzi thinks she can hear her start crying again. “We want what’s best for you, Paige.”

It’s silent for a moment. And then, “Let me be happy, Mom. Let me see my siblings. Let me and my girlfriend have a good trip with y’all.”

Dean interjects. “We really don’t believe in this kind of stuff.”

“I don’t care,” Paige replies viciously. “I love Azzi. It doesn’t matter that she’s a fuckin’ girl. I…” Paige pauses, quite abruptly, and Azzi wonders if something happened. But then she hears a heavy inhalation and a quiet, “I love her, Mom.”

Azzi knows it’s for the act, but she can’t help the way her stomach somersaults, hearing the words she’s always wished Paige would say.

“And it doesn’t matter what you think of it,” Paige continues. “I’m happy. My faith is strong. And what goes on between me and God isn’t your fucking business.”

“Language,” Amy says immediately. But then it’s silent for another weighted moment and Azzi can imagine Amy and Dean sharing that knowing, judgmental look of theirs. Her heart races while she waits for a consensus, and she’s sure it’s 100 times worse for Paige. But after a few moments, Amy says, “Tell your father that you’re staying here with us. Your siblings will be home tomorrow morning. The four of us adults have a reservation at a restaurant tonight, and we’re all going to go.”

“Mom—“

“We will try,” Amy sighs. “Azzi’s a nice girl. We will—we’ll try.” There’s something tired in her voice when she says, “Right, Dean?”

No answer. But Azzi can imagine him nodding gruffly, and a moment later, with no more words from any of them, Paige appears at the bottom of the stairs. She startles a little when she sees Azzi sitting there at the top.

“Hi,” Azzi says sheepishly, finally disconnecting their call. “I was eavesdropping.”

Paige stares at her, and then starts climbing the stairs, a small smile overtaking their face. “Thanks for saving me.”

“I told you I would,” Azzi replies, waiting for Paige at the top. “So. Dinner with your parents tonight.”

“Yeah. I guess.” Paige gets to the second-top step and stays there, so she’s just a little shorter than Azzi.

“Dinner as a fake lesbian couple with your homophobic parents,” Azzi clarifies, and Paige laughs nervously.

“Uh-huh,” she responds. “I think we needa nap before that.”

“Oh, yeah,” Azzi agrees, pulling Paige up to stand with her. “That is an amazing idea.”

——————————————

Azzi is rudely awoken to none other than an old Tyler, The Creator song blasting through the tinny speakers of Paige’s phone. Azzi groans, and she blindly reaches out for Paige to turn the damn thing off, but her hands only find cold bedsheets. Annoyed, Azzi cracks her eyes open and tries desperately to find Paige’s phone, realizing in the process that Paige’s side of the bed is cold. Strange, considering they still have two hours until dinner.

Finally, after probably thirty seconds of this stupid song playing over and over again, Azzi finds the phone tangled up in the bedsheets and slams the off button. It’s sort of pointless, though, because now she’s very much awake and will not be going back to bed.

She sits up in Paige’s bed, rubbing her eyes and looking around the room. The sun is shining through the curtains, reflecting off the mirror above the vanity and showcasing the off-white walls, the pink door to the adjoining bathroom—which Azzi now realizes is in use, the sound of the shower muffled through the door. She hadn’t noticed before because Paige isn’t awfully singing to some Mariah Carey song. Other than the water, it’s dead quiet in there. She must be nervous.

Fiddling with the pink sheets, Azzi feels nervous, too. Usually, merely being in Paige’s space comforts her, but this room—it doesn’t feel like Paige. It doesn’t smell like her, and it’s too pink. There’s no purple at all, actually. And the vanity—Paige has never known how to do much else other than mascara. In high school, she needed Azzi to tell her what concealer was for, and to teach her how to curl her lashes. She certainly wouldn’t have use for an entire vanity dedicated to makeup. The walls are also decorated with cringy, sort of Bible-thumping quotes and paintings of flowers. There’s not a single basketball poster.

No, this room isn’t Paige at all and Azzi feels an ache in her heart, thinking about how out-of-place she must have felt whenever she came to visit as a kid. How out-of-place she must feel now.

Without Paige to talk to, and without her room to comfort her, Azzi settles for laying on Paige’s side of the bed, burying her face in the blankets, and there she is—vanilla, like her hair products, and lavender, like the lotion she wears and the linen spray she uses, because it calms her down.

Azzi thinks she just might fall back asleep, enveloped in Paige’s scent, but then the door to the bathroom opens and steam billows out just before Paige does, wrapped in a towel, hair wet down her shoulders. Azzi only has a second to ogle the water drops adorning Paige’s collarbones before she’s spotted, and Paige gives her a curious look. “You still sleep? I left my phone here so the alarm would wake you up.”

“Yeah, no, it did,” Azzi says, sitting up quickly, before she looks like a weirdo snuggling up in Paige’s spot. “Just tryin’ to hype myself up for dinner.”

Paige gives her a commiserating look. “Me too. I’m shitting my pants, for real.”

“That why you couldn’t sleep?” Azzi asks, stretching out her back and swinging her legs over the side of the bed.

Paige hums, bending down to rifle around in her suitcase. “I’on even know what to wear. Apparently it’s some fancy restaurant but I’m not wearing a fucking dress.”

Azzi laughs at that, lifting her hands when Paige shoots a glare over her shoulder. “I’m serious, dawg! And it’s not like I brought a suit or nothing.”

“I think you’re overthinking it,” Azzi says, standing up. “Just wear jeans and tuck a t-shirt or something. You’ll look cute no matter what.”

Paige straights up and gives her a cocky grin. “You think all that?”

“Chill, P,” Azzi rolls her eyes, shoving Paige’s shoulder a little.

“What were you doing on my side of the bed, anyway?” Paige asks, and Azzi can’t help the way she freezes. She’d thought Paige hadn’t noticed.

Trying to cover her reaction, she shrugs casually. “I didn’t know you owned the right side of the bed.”

“Nah, we’ve always had our sides,” Paige shakes her head, taking a step closer. “Why was you all cuddled up in mine?”

“Oh, I dunno,” Azzi says, trying for sarcastic but she can’t even really make eye contact, “maybe I rolled over or something.”

“Please. You don’t move in your sleep.”

“Maybe I do. You don’t know.”

“I think I’ve slept with you more often than I’ve slept alone,” Paige scoffs, taking a step even closer so that they’re practically chest-to-chest. “I know damn well.”

“Okay, seriously,” Azzi says, taking a small step back and stumbling when her thighs hit the bed, “go get dressed, you weirdo.”

“Mm,” Paige says, pretending to think about it. But before Azzi can move away, she grabs her waist and they both fall onto the bed while Paige starts to tickle her like crazy.

“Paige!” Azzi screams, laughing so hard she almost can’t breathe. “Get—off, oh my God!”

Paige is laughing right along with her, and it’s a miracle her towel hasn’t dropped yet. “Tell me the truth!”

“What the…” Azzi giggles and squeals when Paige goes for her armpit, “fuck!”

“I won’t stop ‘till you admit it!”

“Okay, fuck, okay!” Azzi pushes Paige off her, and Paige lets up just enough for her to gasp and say, “It smelled like you, okay? The sheets, they…” Paige has stopped completely now, staring at her with a shit-eating grin on her stupid face, “they smell like you.”

“Uh-huh,” Paige replies, “and you missed me so much while I was in the shower that you needed to smell my sheets?” She jabs her one more time in the ribs, making Azzi shriek, before rolling off her. “You lil creep.”

“It wasn’t like that!” Azzi insists, even though that’s exactly what it was like. “Now, seriously, go get dressed. You got me all wet.”

What Azzi means by that, of course, is that Paige’s damp towel and sopping hair had transferred to Azzi’s own clothes and hair. But Paige can’t be normal about anything, so she looks over and grins slyly.

“Don’t,” Azzi sighs.

“Oh, no, it’s okay,” Paige says, sitting up in bed and pulling Azzi up with her. “You don’t gotta be embarrassed. I know I make a lotta girls wet.”

“Stop being weird,” Azzi says, as Paige bends down once again to pull an outfit from her suitcase.

She begins walking back to the bathroom. “I’m not the one who gets turned on by tickling,” Paige calls over her shoulder. Just before she closes the bathroom door behind her, she says, “Don’t worry, we can take care of you after dinner, mama,” and winks at her.

Azzi’s shoe hits the door just as it clicks shut.

—————————————

They drive to the restaurant in silence.

It’s similar to their car ride from the airport, though it is a little less tense than before. Paige isn’t fidgeting too much beside her and her parents aren’t giving each other looks the entire time. That’s gotta be a good sign.

When they arrive at the restaurant, Amy and Dean start chatting idly, Paige and Azzi trailing behind when they walk inside the fancy building and give the hostess their reservation.

It’s only when they’re finally seated that they are addressed.

“So, girls,” Amy says, her voice all forced cheerfulness, “what looks good?”

“I dunno,” Paige mumbles, and Azzi kicks her under the table before saying, “Have you guys ever been here before?”

Amy looks a little startled at Azzi’s voice, but she recovers quickly, looking over at Dean with a forced smile. “Oh, yeah, we come here sometimes.”

Azzi smiles politely. “What do you suggest, then?”

“Um,” Amy says, and then she sort of jerks and Dean winces, and Azzi’s sure Amy has also just kicked him under the table.

Apparently well-trained, he speaks immediately. “We love the spinach ricotta.”

Azzi hums, then nudges Paige. “That sounds good, right?”

“Uh…” Paige looks like she wants to be difficult, but then she sees the warning stare Azzi is giving her and straightens up a little, “yeah, yeah. Sounds good.”

“Wanna share?”

Paige sighs, but luckily it’s barely audible. “Yeah, sure. Let’s share.”

Azzi leaves herself out of the conversation after that, letting Paige answer her parents’ conversation starters. When the waitress comes to take their orders, Paige gets a glass of wine for the both of them. Neither of them really like wine, but it seems classy enough and it might take the edge off just enough that they can actually get through the night unscathed.

It’s not until their dinner arrives that Azzi is addressed again.

“So, Azzi,” Dean says, out of nowhere, “How’s the knee?”

Azzi’s hand goes subconsciously to her surgery scars. “Doing better. PT’s been going good.”

“Good, good.” He leans back in his seat, and Azzi senses trouble. Something about the way Paige protectively rests her arm across the back of Azzi’s seat makes her think she senses it, too.

“You get injured a lot, huh?” He asks.

Azzi sort of hates the way her face gets hot, hoping it doesn’t show up on her brown skin. “I’ve torn my ACL twice, yeah.”

“And your meniscus, right?” he prods.

Without really noticing it, Azzi looks over to Paige, and that’s apparently all Paige needs to jump in. “Hey, let’s not talk about it.”

“Why not?” Dean asks, scoffing. Amy is looking between the three of them nervously. “It’s hard not to talk about. Azzi, you don’t even play basketball at this point.”

“Um,” Azzi replies, her instincts telling her to get hot-headed but with the way Paige is buzzing beside her, she’s gonna need to keep her cool.

“What the hell?” Paige says, her hand going from the chair to Azzi’s shoulder. She looks at Amy. “Mom, you said this wouldn’t happen.”

“Your father is just asking a few questions—“

“He’s not my fucking dad!” Paige exclaims, and Azzi jerks as she’s pulled into Paige’s side. “I already have a dad! He raised me, he loves me, Mom, and he’d never say this shit about Azzi.” Angrily, Paige stands up, tossing a few bills onto the counter and helping Azzi to stand beside her.

“Sweetheart,” Amy says, reaching limply for her daughter while Dean sits beside her looking far too smug. “Paige, where are you going? We’re your ride.”

“We’ll Uber,” Paige responds, wrapping an arm around Azzi’s waist. “I’m not gonna make her sit through your bullshit because you don’t know how to act like a decent fucking human being.”

“He was just asking—,” Any starts, sounding exasperated, but Paige cuts her off.

“You know what he was doing.” She glares at Dean, who shakes his head, smirking. “We’ll go back to the house,” she sneers. “But if this doesn’t change by tomorrow we’re leaving.”

And with that, she takes Azzi hands and leads them both out into the night.

—————————————

Paige keeps it together until they get to the house.

As soon as they’re stepping through the door, she turns away from Azzi and leans down to untie her shoes. Azzi does the same, but she doesn’t miss the sniffling sounds coming from her best friend.

Paige refuses to look at her when they start heading upstairs, and she tries to make a beeline for the bathroom once they close her bedroom door shut behind them. But Azzi stops her, placing a gentle hand on her arm. “P?”

Another sniffle. And then a quick wipe at her face before she’s turning around, trying to look nonchalant but her eyes are red and her lip is trembling. “Yeah?”

“Paige,” Azzi says softly, and Paige crumbles, hands coming up to her face as she starts crying.

Azzi steps forward to hug her, pulling her down to hide in her chest. “I’m sorry, P. I’m so sorry, this—this sucks.”

“I’m sorry,” Paige replies, voice all small and muffled in a way that makes Azzi’s heart hurt. “I thought they were gonna try…I wouldn’t have taken you out with them if I knew…”

“Hey, it’s all good,” Azzi responds, running a hand through Paige’s hair. “I didn’t mind, really. I’ve heard worse.”

This is apparently the wrong thing to say, because Paige just cries harder. “Fuck, Az, you shouldn’t have to do this.” She lifts her head up to look at her, and Azzi absently wipes her face. “This sucks. It’s the first week of summer and I—I was shitty to you and now my parents, and I—“

“Paige,” Azzi says sternly. “I wouldn’t have agreed to this if I couldn’t handle it. I can handle it. It’s you that I’m worried about.”

Paige nods, sniffling again. “You don’t gotta worry. I’m fine.”

“You’re obviously not fine, P,” Azzi says, and Paige winces, wiping her nose with the sleeve of her shirt.

“I’m okay,” Paige insists. “Really. As long as we do this together, I’m okay.”

She straightens up like she’s steeling herself, and Azzi thinks maybe she should do the same.

This is only the first day of their two-week stay.

It’s going to be a long trip.

@azzibuckets @smiths-fan--13 @ch12334 @makethemhoesmad @the-other-half @rosemariiaa

[whatdidtheydotomygirljinx]

Why Episode 7 is the worst episode in all of Season 2.

This fuckass Timebomb ship is the worst thing to ever happen to Jinx's character.

Ok so finally we're gonna talk about Boy Savior Complex and AU Girl Next Door Powder

This is gonna be long. Also, we're not only talking about Episode 7 and Timebomb, we're also discussing Jinx's suicide attempt and how her character's resolution is actually really sad.

First of all, Jinx never liked Ekko back. Season 1 makes it pretty clear that they're friends, and that Ekko has an unrequited crush on her. His feelings are clear, but she never shows any reciprocation. And, no, the art book that came out after season 2 concluded doesn't count. You can't just put "the boy with the unrequited crush" trope in your story and then retract it.

And now to get to the serious part... who the fuck is AU Powder?

Ekko gets transported into this alternate timeline where we the audience soon realize everyone is happy and none of the conflicts that plague the original story exist and everything is perfect and "as it should be". So this is the ideal world and the one where all these characters reach their highest form of happiness. Even Silco is back with Vander.

And in this ideal world Powder is... a waitress at The Last Drop? I rewatched this episode and I genuinely tried to pay attention to see what does she actually DO. Like what occupies her time in this universe. And between Vander's line about how she's "too smart to be spending her life in a bar" and the fact that she is at one point behind the counter (while Ekko is studying his books... imma get back to that) and the fact that we never see her in any other places besides the bar and her hideout and that one time Ekko takes her out... this seems to be it.

So in the perfect timeline, Powder has decided to stay back with her family once she's grown up, to remain with Vander and help him run his bar, and implicitly has no big ambitions of her own, and definitely no ideas that she would sacrifice her family life for.

Now... Powder/Jinx as a family person is not actually wrong characterization. This is pretty congruent with her character in season 1. Her entire story and literally everything revolves around her family and not much else. When she's Powder she's attached at the hip to Vi and when she's Jinx she doesn't seem too interested in the world outside of her hideout and Silco's office. So considering all we know, yes, Jinx does place family first.

And this is pretty assumed by the show. Now, I also characterized her like this in season 1! She is a family girl. And Jinx happens to have all these people with big revolutionary ideas around her, be it Vander or Vi or Silco or Sevika, but she herself never actually seems much interested in that. She has a small moment in arc 1 of season 1, which i think it's significant to mention comes right after Vi plants the idea in her head. It would've been one thing if these ideas stayed with her, but post time-skip she doesn't bring anything like that up again. She mostly acts like a bored teenager whenever Silco drags her to the river to tell her all about his tragic past that radicalized him. Overall, any time she exhibits any revolutionary spirit, it seems to actually be more of a personal vendetta for her.

So, okay, Jinx is a family girl and she's never really actually been about all these big ideas, I can agree with the writers that this represents her character.

It's just that... this much?

Man, COME ON. There were people making "Everything's Perfect" AUs since season 1, and they almost all had Powder be a student at the Academy. This girl was clearly passionate about her little inventions, her bombs didn't work but she kept and kept trying. You're telling me she would be completely uninterested in learning more about engineering, in getting a formal education in that, in doing anything with it? Since in this world, there's peace between Piltover and Zaun, we can't talk about any barriers to her becoming a student. And, for that matter, in League lore there's an academy in Zaun, too, that she could have attended.

Even Ekko points it out, man. Now, to the writers' credit, the story acknowledges quite clearly that Powder choosing to stay with Vander and help him run the bar is weird. It just... never explains it. Like why is she like this, though? Let's throw out some possibilies:

(1) in some scenes, there seems to be a little "jinxiness" in this Powder, too. maybe she's aware of that side of her, and doesn't like it, and fears that if she went off and did what she wanted, and was truly herself, it would ruin what she has, "things are good now" (in this case, this Powder is actually a tragic character. nowhere near ideal timeline stuff.)

(2) in act 1 of season 1, the reason Vi makes Powder stay back is because she fears losing her, after Vander tells her that she might lose Powder in a confrontation with Piltover. since Vi dies in this universe, on a job, maybe in that moment Powder internalizes that rocking the boat in any way is bad. Vi was spirited and had big ideas and wanted to be someone and it led to her death. so maybe this Powder gave up on all of that then. Vander seems like the type to give her a "look what happens" speech, too.

But these are just my theories. This doesn't ever get properly explained in the show. So then maybe Powder is actually content like this and likes this and maybe these people constantly pestering her that she could do and be more are just annoying nuisances to her, same as Sevika is an annoying nuisance to Jinx in the original timeline (although there it makes significantly more sense).

(Also, why is Vi even dead in this universe? They could've easily found another way for Piltover and Zaun to make peace. Guess Jinx doesn't even get to be happy in the Perfect Timeline, goddamn, girl really is cursed after all.)

If you're gonna spend an entire episode on fix-it fanfiction that is supposed to pander to fans and give them, on screen, what they always wanted to see, why didn't we get grown up Powder in a cute academy uniform, being a top student and working on school projects and being loved by her professors cause girl was a prodigy.

Instead... this is Ekko in this universe, actually.

Ekko is the "big idea guy" and he's working on an entry to the innovations fair and he gets to be Heimerdinger's pupil. To her credit, this Powder still seems to be very smart, Ekko comes to her for help cause he can't actually build his invention alone. But she only uses her intellect to help Ekko. I always thought it would be Powder who would be Heimerdinger's pupil. Instead, here, she's hanging off Ekko's arm, and being all cute, as he discusses Important Stuff with Heimerdinger, stuff that she doesn't get to be privy to, but that she is expected to help them with anyway.

So AU Powder is this very smart girl who is helping her boyfriend build his entry for a contest because he can't actually do it himself but it's okay she'll help him of course and no he can take all the credit she doesn't want to be recognized or anything or to go to like University that would be crazy she's doing it cause she loves him and she's sweet like that and she likes to help others and she doesn't have any character traits that make her difficult she's just a cute funny and relatable down-to-earth girl and she pokes fun at Ekko but like in a loving way and she likes being a waitress and she'd rather be recognized for her dancing skills and................ I'm sorry.....................

So you're telling me Ekko gets transported into an alternate timeline in which his childhood crush who never liked him back is stripped of all her personality, has no goals or ambitions of her own and has no interests besides being his supportive girlfriend, is devoid of all the traits that might have made a relationship with her difficult, and despite the fact that she never showed interest in him in the original world, here she is head over heels for him, always acting all lovey-dovey with him and being nothing but a cute and affectionate puppy.

This is every little boy's with an unrequited crush dream right here. Man, Ekko won more than any other character in this show. And she's mentally ill, too! He's hit the jackpot. Y'all what the fuck am I watching.

I'm sorry but literally ALL I COULD FUCKING SEE WHEN I WAS WATCHING THIS STUPID DANCE SCENE was that in this universe Powder is a good christian girl who stays home with her dad and loves her boyfriend and is always happy to help WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS GOOD GIRL PROPAGANDA get this bullshit OFF my fucking screen I cannot fucking believe what I'm watching here

Moving on.

Ekko has hurt Jinx more than any other character in the show.

Physically speaking.

Ekko is the one who does this.

Which leads to this.

Which ultimately leads to this.

It has always confused me and it continues to confuse me why no one in this fandom treats Jinx being injected with shimmer as a big deal, when this is the worst thing that happens to her post episode 3. And it's a point of no return for her character, she can't undo this. And yeah I know everyone thought Shimmer Jinx was cool in season 2, but her being turned into a half-dead monster is not a good progression for her character. She also goes through agonizing pain in the process.

Singed agrees.

It's Ekko who forces Jinx between death and being turned into a half-dead corpse. It's actually insane to me that no one in the fandom considers this and that this is never brought up in the show. If they wanted Jinx and Ekko to be a thing, you'd think this would be a big deal in their relationship. Ekko has changed her irreparably, for the worse.

Idk, is the guy who beat you up and left you for dead really boyfriend material?

This is the first moment Jinx shows any interest in Ekko. Interesting timing.

I'm pretty sure she doesn't even mention his name post act 3 of season 1. She doesn't wonder about whether he's alright after the bridge fight (for that matter, neither does he). The first time when Jinx looks at him with any hint of affection is when she's standing on a ledge, ready to throw herself off.

Jinx has no one anymore at this point. Her old family is long gone. Silco is dead. Isha is dead. Vi has decided having a good time with Caitlyn is more important than her. This is Jinx at her lowest moment. Does she like him back or is he just the only one who showed up?

Ekko is a winner once again. His crush has been abandoned by everyone, and he is the only one left to comfort her. Luck like this is hard to come by. And of course, she's gonna be super impressed and touched by any sliver of affection now. Probably gonna look at him with big, grateful eyes, and see him as her savior. I'm disgusted.

By the way, this should have never been Ekko. If Vi was too busy with fucking Caitlyn, this should have been Sevika. Sevika is the only character who has known Jinx since she was a child, and who has been with her through every iteration. And she's the only character who has never cared whether she's Jinx or Powder or any other persona she decides to take up, to her she'll always just be an annoying kid. And to Jinx this might actually be comforting. Sevika is the only one who has a realistic perspective on Jinx, and recognizes her flaws, so her talking her down might have actually been very touching, and there are things she could tell her that neither Vi nor Silco could.

(The fuck could Ekko tell her, honestly? That he went off to an alternate universe where she was his perfect girlfriend, so she shouldn't kill herself actually? What the fuck.)

I also wanna talk a bit about Jinx's resolution as a character. Not her fake-out death, but her in the last episode. I think it's interesting that everyone who had a connection to Jinx is gone, namely Silco and Isha. Silco and Isha are both people she chooses, actively, and she is herself around. Instead, now, she's back to Vi and Ekko, the same people that were with her in her childhood. This is a full circle moment for her.

This is Powder right here, guys. Powder was a little girl who made a mistake and then she went off on this journey where she met new people and she was someone else and it was fun for a while but ultimately she realized what she was doing was bad and she came back to her family and is ready to be that little, sweet girl again. The problem with the Powder-Jinx dichotomy is that Jinx, as much as she represents all this bad stuff that the show has made clear, also represents Freedom and Power, two things that Powder definitively lacked. Her coming full circle, coming back to Powder, is not actually a good resolution for her. She's right back where she started, with Vi and Ekko. Her venturing off on her own and making her own decisions was ultimately a mistake that only lead to her suffering. We can take this all the way back to when she decides to venture off on her own with that bomb, despite Vi's disagreement, and the consequences plague her for the rest of the story.

I know everyone thought it looked super cool when she lifted off that hood, but I could only think it was tragic.

[saebyeokbliss]

could u do a fic of saebyeok in college, but she sells drugs. Only cocaine, marijuana, and ecstasy. She does it so she can take care of cheol ofc. Saebyeok is also known to be a hoe. Constantly flirting with girls around campus so they can buy wtv drugs she has, sleeping w girls and then treating them like the don’t exist the next day. Yet saebyeoks fast life came to a complete stop when she met you. A shy girl who’s very clever. Saebyeok noticed a guy hitting on u w u visibly uncomfortable so saebyeok came to rescue you. After she asked if u had any money to buy some drugs off her to which you said you did’nt. Saebyeok asked if u smoked. The truth is you didn’t, you hated all drugs. It was embarrassing ur a 21 yr virgin hanging around saebyeok who has had her head in between a fair share of womens legs. Any ways you and saebyeok become fwb (friends w benefits). She acts like she doesnt like you,she says you guys are only using eachother to get off. She’s not entirely wrong but what happens when u both start developing feelings and saebyeok tells u a bit abt her personal life when shes high?

(Can we pretend saebyeok is 22 and reader is 21 🙏)

-💝( still dk if ur doing emoji anons it’s ok if not! No pressure)

ALL THE STARS

pairing: dealer!college au!kang sae-byeok x fem!reader synopsis: kang sae-byeok had a reputation around your college. the dealer, the girl who could get anyone she wanted. however, just like anyone else, she had a past and a life beyond what people called her. and you just happened to be the one to change her. warnings: angst, language, mentions of violence, illness, past trauma, drug use (past), recovery themes, slow burn, emotional moments, hurt/comfort

a/n: had this one brewing for while hehe

The red ink on the paper burned into your vision, each stroke of the professor’s pen a reminder of your failure.

72%.

It wasn’t failing, not technically, but for you? It may as well have been. You had always prided yourself on your intelligence, on your ability to stay ahead of the curve. But this? This was unacceptable.

Slumping in your seat, you shoved the paper into your bag, avoiding the pitiful glances from classmates who knew how much this would bother you. As soon as the lecture ended, you all but stormed out of the hall, only stopping when a familiar voice called after you.

“Hey, hey, slow down.” Ji-min grabbed your wrist gently, pulling you to a stop. Her brows furrowed as she studied your expression. “What’s wrong?”

You exhaled sharply. “I bombed the exam.”

Ji-min blinked. “Wait—bombed?” She scoffed. “What’d you get, a 90?”

“…72.”

Her lips parted slightly in surprise before she quickly schooled her expression into something more neutral. “Okay, so not your best, but it’s not the end of the world.”

“It feels like it,” you muttered, rubbing your temples.

Ji-min sighed, looping her arm through yours as she led you out of the building. “You need to relax. You’ve been overworking yourself for weeks, and it’s catching up to you. It’s just one test, and you’ll bounce back—like you always do.”

You didn’t respond, letting her drag you along as you sulked in silence. Ji-min was probably right, but that didn’t make you feel any better.

“Which is exactly why,” she continued, a mischievous glint in her eyes, “you’re coming to the party tonight.”

You groaned. “Ji-min—”

“Nope. No arguing.” She tightened her grip on your arm. “You need a night to unwind. And don’t even try to say you have studying to do.”

“I do, though,” you huffed.

“You always do.” Ji-min shook her head. “But just this once, let yourself breathe. Have a little fun. You don’t even have to drink—just come, dance a little, talk to people. Who knows, maybe you’ll meet someone.”

You rolled your eyes. “Because that’s exactly what I need right now.”

“Yes, actually.” She grinned. “A distraction.”

You frowned, hesitating. The idea of going to a crowded, sweaty party wasn’t exactly appealing, but… maybe Ji-min had a point. Maybe you did need a night to forget about everything—just for a little while.

“…Fine,” you relented, sighing.

Ji-min squealed in victory, squeezing your arm excitedly. “You won’t regret it.”

You had a feeling you just might.

You stared at your reflection in the mirror, second-guessing every single choice you had made for the night.

The black miniskirt hugged your waist just right, and the red lace top was a little more revealing than what you usually went for, but Ji-min had insisted that you “embrace your hotness.” Paired with delicate white lace socks and Mary Janes, you looked… cute. Maybe even really cute.

But was it you?

A knock at your door interrupted your thoughts. “Come on, let me see you!” Ji-min’s voice rang through your small apartment.

You sighed, smoothing down your skirt before stepping out. Ji-min’s eyes widened the moment she saw you, a grin stretching across her lips.

“Oh my God.” She grabbed your hands and spun you around. “You look adorable—but also kinda sexy? It’s giving ‘innocent but could ruin lives.’” She wiggled her brows suggestively.

You rolled your eyes, heat creeping up your neck. “You’re being dramatic.”

“No, I’m being correct.” Ji-min smirked, looping her arm through yours as she led you toward the door. “Come on, let’s go before you change your mind.”

The party was already in full swing by the time you arrived. The bass of whatever rap song was playing vibrated through the walls, and the air smelled like a mix of alcohol, weed, and sweat. People were packed into the house, some dancing, some making out in corners, and others just drunkenly shouting over the music.

You hesitated in the doorway, already overwhelmed.

Ji-min, on the other hand, was in her element.

“Alright, I’m gonna go kick some ass in Apateu,” she said, referring to the drinking game she was obsessed with. She gave your hand a reassuring squeeze. “You’ll be fine, yeah? Just get a drink, talk to people. You look too good to be standing alone all night.”

Before you could protest, she was gone, disappearing into the crowd with a wave.

You sighed, crossing your arms as you leaned against the wall, feeling out of place. You weren’t much of a drinker, and you weren’t interested in hooking up with some stranger, so what were you even doing here?

Lost in your thoughts, you barely noticed when someone stepped into your personal space.

“Hey,” a voice drawled.

You blinked up at the guy standing way too close to you. He was tall, decently attractive, but the cocky smirk on his face made you uneasy.

“You here alone?” he asked, his eyes shamelessly roaming over you.

You shifted uncomfortably. “No, I’m with a friend.”

He chuckled, taking a sip of whatever was in his red cup. “Haven’t seen you at one of these before. You new?”

You shook your head. “Not really. Just don’t go to parties much.”

“Makes sense. You seem… different from the usual crowd.” His smirk widened as he leaned in slightly, his voice dropping. “In a good way.”

You forced a polite smile, wishing Ji-min would miraculously reappear and drag you away.

“So, you wanna dance?” he asked, stepping closer.

You took a step back, your heart starting to race—not in a good way. “I’m okay, thanks.”

“Oh, come on.” He reached out, fingers brushing your arm. “Just one dance.”

Your stomach twisted. You weren’t scared, not exactly, but the way he was looking at you, like you were something to be convinced, made you uneasy.

And then—

A voice, smooth and slightly amused, cut through the tension.

“She said no.”

You turned your head, and there she was.

Kang Sae-byeok.

You had seen her around campus before—everyone had. She was infamous. Mysterious, sharp-eyed, and always carrying that lazy smirk that made girls fall at her feet, only to be discarded by morning. She was trouble, the kind of trouble that came wrapped in leather jackets and cigarette smoke, the kind that left a mess in its wake.

And right now, she was looking at the guy in front of you like he was something stuck to the bottom of her shoe.

“She said no,” Sae-byeok repeated, her voice firm, yet almost bored, like she had dealt with this kind of thing a hundred times before.

The guy scoffed, his grip on his drink tightening. “And who the hell are you?”

Sae-byeok tilted her head slightly, her dark eyes glinting under the dim party lights. “Doesn’t matter. What matters is that you back the fuck off.” She took a step closer, her presence alone enough to shift the energy in the air.

The guy hesitated, glancing between you and Sae-byeok, clearly debating whether it was worth pushing his luck. He must have decided against it because he let out an annoyed huff and muttered, “Whatever,” before disappearing into the crowd.

You exhaled, realizing you had been holding your breath.

“You okay?” Sae-byeok asked, her gaze flickering to yours.

You nodded quickly. “Yeah. Thanks for that.”

She studied you for a moment, then smirked. “He bothering you before I showed up?”

“Kind of,” you admitted, shifting on your feet. “He wouldn’t take the hint.”

Sae-byeok hummed, like she had expected that answer. “Guys like him are everywhere,” she muttered. Then, her smirk widened slightly. “Good thing you’ve got me, huh?”

You blinked. “I—uh—”

She chuckled, clearly amused by your flustered expression. “Relax. I’m just messing with you.” Her eyes flicked over your outfit, and she let out a low whistle. “Didn’t know girls like you came to these parties.”

You frowned. “Girls like me?”

She shrugged. “You just seem… different.”

You weren’t sure if that was a compliment or not. “Ji-min dragged me here,” you admitted.

“Ah.” Sae-byeok nodded knowingly. “That makes sense.”

You raised a brow. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

She smirked. “That you don’t really belong here.”

Your lips parted slightly, caught between offense and curiosity. “And you do?”

Sae-byeok chuckled, but there was something unreadable in her expression. “More than you think.”

Before you could ask what she meant, she leaned in slightly, close enough that you caught the faint scent of cigarettes and something sweet—maybe perfume, maybe something else.

“You got any money?” she asked, voice low.

You blinked, confused by the sudden shift. “What?”

“For a little something to take the edge off.” She smirked, tapping her fingers against her thigh. “Coke, weed, molly—I’ve got whatever you need.”

Your stomach twisted. You didn’t do drugs. You didn’t even drink.

“I don’t—” You hesitated, suddenly embarrassed. “I don’t do that stuff.”

Sae-byeok raised a brow, clearly surprised. “Really?”

You nodded.

She studied you for a second before her smirk returned, this time softer, almost teasing. “Cute.”

Heat crept up your neck. “I—I should probably find Ji-min.”

Sae-byeok chuckled, stepping back slightly. “Go ahead.”

You hesitated for a moment before turning to walk away, but you barely took two steps before her voice stopped you.

“Hey.”

You glanced over your shoulder.

Sae-byeok tilted her head, her dark eyes flickering with something unreadable. “See you around, yeah?”

You swallowed hard. “…Yeah.”

And with that, you disappeared into the party, your heart pounding for an entirely different reason than before.

The children’s home was always quieter than you expected.

You had been coming here for nearly a year now, visiting your little sister, Yu-jin, whenever you could. And yet, every time you stepped through those doors, the sterile stillness of the place made your chest tighten.

Yu-jin’s face lit up the moment she saw you, her small frame practically tackling you in a hug. “Unnie!”

You laughed softly, wrapping your arms around her. “Hey, baby. Did you miss me?”

She pulled back just enough to pout up at you. “Obviously.”

Your heart ached. She was only eight, still too young to really understand why she was here, why your parents—if they could even be called that—had decided she was too much to take care of. But she understood enough to know that you were the only one who still came back for her.

You spent the next hour with her, playing board games, helping her braid the hair of one of her dolls, and listening to her ramble about the latest school drama—who stole whose eraser, who got in trouble for talking too much, and how she definitely deserved extra dessert at lunch today.

It was a small escape, a moment where you could pretend things were normal.

But eventually, visiting hours started to wind down, and you had to say goodbye.

Yu-jin clung to your waist as you knelt in front of her. “You’ll come back soon, right?”

You smiled, brushing some hair out of her face. “Of course. I’ll be back before you even have time to miss me.”

She huffed. “Too late for that.”

Your chest tightened again, but you just pressed a kiss to the top of her head before gently prying her arms from around you. “Be good, okay?”

She nodded reluctantly, stepping back as one of the caretakers came to usher her inside.

You watched until she was out of sight before turning to leave, your heart heavy.

And that’s when you saw her.

Kang Sae-byeok.

She was walking down the hallway, hands shoved in the pockets of her oversized hoodie, her face unreadable. But what caught your attention wasn’t just her—it was the fact that she had just come from the same visiting area you had.

For a moment, she didn’t see you. But then, just as she was about to walk past, her dark eyes flickered up and met yours.

Recognition flashed across her face—followed immediately by something else. Something guarded.

You opened your mouth to say something, maybe a simple “hi,” maybe a question about why she was here, but before you could get a word out, she brushed past you without a single glance back.

No smirk. No teasing remark. Nothing.

Just silence.

You stood there, stunned, watching as she disappeared through the exit like she couldn’t get away fast enough.

And for the first time since meeting her, you saw a version of Sae-byeok that had nothing to do with her reputation, with the confident, untouchable girl who flirted with strangers and sold drugs like it was second nature.

This was something else entirely.

And you weren’t sure what to make of it.

You really needed to start saying no to Ji-min.

Another party, another night of being dragged into a place where you didn’t belong. The music was loud, the air thick with the scent of alcohol and weed, and bodies moved together in a sweaty, chaotic rhythm.

You sighed, nursing the same half-empty cup of soda you had been holding for the past twenty minutes. Ji-min had already disappeared into some drinking game, leaving you to lean against the wall, watching the party unfold around you.

And then—

A familiar voice, smooth and teasing, cut through the noise.

“Didn’t think I’d see you here again.”

You turned your head, heart stuttering for half a second.

Sae-byeok.

She was dressed in her usual effortless way—baggy jeans, a fitted black top, and her signature leather jacket slung over her shoulders. But it wasn’t just her presence that caught you off guard.

It was the fact that this time, she was actually talking to you.

“I could say the same about you,” you shot back, raising a brow.

Sae-byeok smirked. “Pretty sure that’s not true.”

You rolled your eyes, but there was no real annoyance behind it. “What do you want?”

She tilted her head like she was considering something, her dark eyes scanning over you in a way that made your skin heat. “Maybe just some company.”

You blinked. “You? Want my company?”

She chuckled, leaning against the wall beside you. “Yeah, why not?”

You hesitated. After what happened at the children’s home, you half-expected her to keep avoiding you. But now, here she was, acting like that moment had never happened. Like she hadn’t practically run past you without a word.

Maybe it was better not to ask.

So instead, you shrugged, feigning nonchalance. “Fine. But I’m not drinking, so if you’re trying to—”

“I don’t care about that,” she interrupted, smirk still in place. “Just talk to me.”

And so, you did.

You weren’t sure how it happened, but somehow, you and Sae-byeok ended up spending the rest of the party together. She wasn’t as closed-off as you’d expected—she was sarcastic, quick-witted, and had a way of making you laugh without even trying.

She also had a way of making you nervous.

Because the longer you talked, the closer she got. A hand on your waist as she leaned in to hear you better. Fingers brushing against your arm, her breath warm against your ear when she made a teasing remark.

By the time you realized what was happening, it was already too late.

You wanted her.

And she knew it.

Which was probably why, an hour later, you found yourself pressed against your apartment door, Sae-byeok’s lips hot against yours.

You barely remembered how you got there. One second, she was murmuring something about leaving the party, and the next, her hands were on you, her jacket discarded somewhere on the floor as she kissed you like she had been waiting all night for it.

Your fingers tangled in her hair, a soft gasp escaping you when she pressed her body flush against yours. She tasted like cigarettes and something sweet, something undeniably her.

“This okay?” she murmured against your lips, her hands slipping under your shirt, warm against your skin.

You nodded, breathless. “Yeah.”

That was all she needed.

The rest of the night blurred together in a haze of soft moans and tangled sheets, of Sae-byeok’s lips against your skin, her hands exploring every inch of you like she was mapping out something she planned to return to.

And when it was over, when you were both spent and lying in the quiet of your room, you half-expected her to leave.

But she didn’t.

Instead, she lay next to you, her breathing steady in the dim light. Not touching, not speaking. Just existing in the same space.

It felt like something shifted in the air between you.

Something unspoken.

Something neither of you were ready to acknowledge.

Not yet.

The thing about sleeping with Kang Sae-byeok was that it didn’t just stay in your apartment.

It bled into your everyday life—subtle but unmistakable.

At school, it was the way her hand would brush against your waist when she passed by in the hallway, her fingers just barely ghosting over the fabric of your skirt before she was gone. It was the way she’d smirk at you across the library, eyes dark with implication, as if daring you to recall exactly what she had done to you the night before.

It was in the stolen moments between classes, when she’d pull you into an empty classroom or an abandoned stairwell, pressing you against the wall with her lips on your neck, her hands slipping under your shirt just long enough to leave a mark—something only the two of you knew was there.

Yet no one ever caught on.

Not Ji-min, who still dragged you to parties without realizing you had already found the ultimate distraction. Not your professors, who had no idea that the reason you were sometimes a little dazed in class was because Sae-byeok had been between your legs just an hour before.

And certainly not the girls who still fell for Sae-byeok’s effortless charm, unaware that no matter how much she flirted, no matter how many lingering glances she gave them, she always ended up in your bed.

But if anyone should have noticed, it was Chae-won.

Chae-won was one of Sae-byeok’s old hookups—one of many, from what you had heard. She was also a regular customer, which was probably why she was currently pressed up against Sae-byeok outside of one of the campus buildings, whispering something in her ear.

You weren’t close enough to hear, but you didn’t need to.

You could tell exactly what was happening.

Sae-byeok, however, looked… bored.

She handed Chae-won a small baggie—probably molly, maybe coke—and took the cash in exchange, slipping it into her pocket without a word.

Chae-won, clearly expecting more, leaned in closer, her fingers trailing down Sae-byeok’s arm. “Come on, babe,” she murmured, her voice just loud enough for you to catch. “It’s been a while.”

Sae-byeok didn’t even hesitate.

“No.”

Chae-won blinked. “What?”

Sae-byeok sighed, stepping back slightly. “You got what you wanted,” she said, nodding toward the baggie in Chae-won’s hand. “Now go.”

Chae-won’s expression twisted into something almost petulant. “So that’s it? You’re just done with me?”

Sae-byeok’s gaze was flat. “Yeah.”

For a second, Chae-won looked like she might argue, but then she scoffed, shoving the drugs into her pocket. “Whatever,” she muttered before turning on her heel and stalking away.

Sae-byeok watched her go, her expression unreadable. Then, as if sensing your gaze, she glanced up—directly at you.

You raised a brow.

She smirked.

And just like that, she was walking toward you, slipping her hands into her pockets like nothing had happened.

The room was quiet except for the occasional hum of traffic outside your window and the soft rustling of sheets as Sae-byeok shifted beside you.

She was staying the night again.

It had started as just another hookup, another night tangled in each other, breathless and flushed against the sheets. But now, hours later, she was still here, lying on her back, staring up at the ceiling as she took another hit from the joint she had rolled earlier.

You watched as she exhaled slowly, the smoke curling lazily in the dim glow of your bedside lamp.

“You’re gonna stink up my room,” you muttered, but there was no real annoyance in your voice.

Sae-byeok smirked, turning her head to look at you. “You say that like I haven’t already.”

You rolled your eyes, but she wasn’t wrong. The scent of weed mixed with the lingering traces of sweat and sex—of her—was all over your sheets.

You expected her to just enjoy her high in silence, like she usually did. But tonight, something was different.

Because tonight, Sae-byeok started talking.

“You ever think about how fucked up everything is?” she mused, her voice slightly hazy from the weed.

You blinked. “That’s… vague.”

She chuckled, but there was something bitter underneath it. “I mean life. How some people just get fucked over from the start while others have everything handed to them.” She took another drag, then exhaled. “I used to think I could change that. Like, if I worked hard enough, I could make things better.”

You stayed quiet, sensing something deeper in her words.

Sae-byeok let out a sharp breath, shaking her head. “But that’s bullshit. No matter how hard you work, if you’re born at the bottom, you stay at the bottom—unless you’re willing to do whatever it takes.”

You swallowed, watching the way her fingers tightened slightly around the joint.

“That’s why I do what I do,” she continued, staring at the ceiling again. “Selling, stealing, fucking people over if I have to. Because no one’s ever given a shit about me or my brother, so why should I play by the rules? The rules were never made for people like us.”

Her voice cracked slightly on that last part, and your chest ached.

You had known—or at least suspected—that her life wasn’t easy. But hearing it from her, hearing the raw frustration, the exhaustion, the pain in her words… it was different.

You hesitated before reaching out, gently taking the joint from her fingers and setting it aside in the ashtray.

She turned her head toward you, blinking slowly, her pupils blown wide from the high.

“Why are you telling me this?” you asked softly.

Sae-byeok scoffed, but it lacked her usual sharpness. “Maybe I’m too high to shut up.”

You studied her for a moment before murmuring, “Or maybe you just don’t want to be alone with it anymore.”

She didn’t say anything, but the way her jaw tightened told you enough.

You moved closer, hesitantly brushing your fingers over hers. Her breath hitched slightly, but she didn’t pull away.

Instead, she turned onto her side, her dark eyes searching yours, something vulnerable flickering beneath the usual guardedness.

Then, suddenly, her lips were on yours.

It wasn’t like your usual kisses.

This wasn’t rushed, wasn’t just a means to an end. This was slow, deep, desperate in a way that had nothing to do with sex and everything to do with something neither of you were ready to name.

You kissed her back just as fiercely, your fingers threading through her hair, pulling her closer, grounding her.

When you finally broke apart, your foreheads rested together, your breaths mingling in the quiet.

“I’m here for you,” you murmured. “Not just for this. For you.”

Sae-byeok tensed slightly, like she wasn’t sure how to process that.

But then, after a long moment, she exhaled and pressed her lips to yours again—softer this time.

The children’s home always had a certain stillness to it, but today, it felt different. Heavier.

You had barely stepped through the doors when the head caretaker, Mrs. Park, approached you, her expression unusually serious.

“Ah, you’re here,” she said, folding her hands in front of her. “I was hoping to talk to you.”

Your stomach twisted. “Is Yu-jin okay?”

Mrs. Park hesitated, and that hesitation alone was enough to make your heart drop.

“She hasn’t been feeling well lately,” she admitted gently. “Nothing too alarming, but she’s been fatigued, hasn’t had much of an appetite, and she’s been getting a lot of bruises.”

You frowned. “Bruises?”

“She says she doesn’t remember how she got them,” Mrs. Park continued, concern etched into her features. “Normally, I’d assume it’s just roughhousing with the other kids, but… I think it would be best if you took her to a doctor.”

Your breath caught in your throat.

Yu-jin was small, but she was tough. She rarely got sick, and when she did, she never complained about it.

If she was acting off, then something was really wrong.

“I’ll take her,” you said immediately. “I’ll call around and see if I can get an appointment for her soon.”

Mrs. Park nodded, giving you a reassuring pat on the shoulder. “She’s in the playroom. She’ll be happy to see you.”

You forced a smile, but your mind was already racing.

You didn’t have much money. Your parents had made sure of that when they dumped Yu-jin at the home and left you to fend for yourself. You could probably scrape together enough for a basic check-up, but if something more serious was going on…

You swallowed hard. You couldn’t think like that. Not yet.

Taking a steadying breath, you made your way to the playroom.

Yu-jin’s face lit up the moment she saw you, but as she ran toward you, you noticed it.

She looked pale. Too pale. And when she threw her arms around you, she felt too light, like she had lost weight since your last visit.

“Unnie!” she chirped, but her voice had a slight rasp to it.

You pulled back slightly, trying to keep the worry off your face. “Hey, baby,” you murmured, brushing some hair out of her face. “How are you feeling?”

She shrugged. “Okay, I guess.”

“Mrs. Park said you’ve been tired a lot,” you pressed gently.

Yu-jin pouted. “I just get sleepy. And my legs feel weird sometimes.”

Your stomach clenched.

You needed to get her to a doctor. Soon.

But how the hell were you going to afford it?

And Sae-byeok wasn’t stupid.

She noticed things.

She noticed the way your smile didn’t reach your eyes when you greeted her. The way your responses were shorter, more distant. The way you barely reacted when she slid a hand along your waist in the empty hallway between classes, when normally, you’d roll your eyes and tell her to behave.

At first, she didn’t say anything.

She just watched.

Waited.

But when you barely looked at her during the entire party Ji-min had dragged you to, she had enough.

The moment she got you alone—outside on the balcony, away from the swarm of drunken students—she pressed you against the railing, her hands bracketing you in, her dark eyes scanning your face.

“What’s wrong with you?” she asked bluntly.

You blinked, caught off guard. “What?”

“You’ve been weird all week.” Her head tilted slightly, searching your expression. “What’s going on?”

You swallowed, avoiding her gaze. “Nothing. I’m just tired.”

Sae-byeok didn’t buy it.

She leaned in slightly, lowering her voice. “You never get tired of this.” Her fingers brushed against your hip, her touch light but suggestive. “So what is it?”

For a second, you almost gave in.

Almost let her kiss the thoughts out of your head, let her hands distract you from the weight sitting heavy on your chest.

But you just… couldn’t.

Gently, you reached down and pushed her hand away.

“I’m just not in the mood,” you murmured, barely recognizing the words as they left your lips.

Sae-byeok froze.

It was small, barely noticeable, but you felt the way her body tensed for half a second before she pulled back.

She studied you, her expression unreadable.

Then, she scoffed lightly, shoving her hands into her pockets. “Huh.”

You frowned. “What?”

“Nothing,” she muttered, glancing away. “Guess I’ll see you later, then.”

And just like that, she was gone, disappearing back into the party without another word.

You exhaled, gripping the railing tightly as you shut your eyes.

You knew she wasn’t mad.

But you also knew that Sae-byeok didn’t do feelings.

And for the first time, you worried that she might take your distance as something it wasn’t.

That she might think you didn’t want her anymore.

When really, she was the only person you didn’t want to push away.

Sae-byeok hadn’t planned on staying long.

She never did when she came to visit Cheol. The children’s home always felt too sterile, too full of things she didn’t want to think about. But she came anyway—because Cheol needed her. Because she was the only one looking out for him.

But today, something was wrong.

The moment she stepped through the front gates, she noticed the emergency vehicle parked outside, its flashing lights casting eerie reflections against the windows. A group of caretakers stood near the entrance, their faces tight with concern as paramedics wheeled out a small gurney.

A child lay on it.

A little girl.

Sae-byeok barely spared the scene a glance. Kids got sick all the time. Accidents happened. It wasn’t any of her business.

She walked past them, slipping inside the building and heading toward the playroom where she knew Cheol would be.

When she found him, he was sitting on the floor, his coloring book open in front of him—but he wasn’t coloring. He was just staring at the page, gripping a crayon so tightly his knuckles were white.

Sae-byeok frowned, crouching down beside him. “What’s with you?”

Cheol glanced up, his face unusually serious. “Yu-jin got sick.”

Sae-byeok blinked. “Who?”

“My friend.” He pointed toward the door, as if she should’ve already known. “She was here with me. We were coloring, and then she said she felt dizzy. She tried to stand up, but she just—” He hesitated, swallowing hard. “She fell, noona. She wouldn’t wake up. The teachers called the ambulance.”

Something in Sae-byeok’s chest twisted uncomfortably.

She exhaled, ruffling Cheol’s hair in what she hoped was a reassuring way. “She’ll be fine,” she muttered. “Hospitals know what they’re doing.”

Cheol didn’t look convinced, but he just nodded, his small fingers still clenched around the crayon.

Sae-byeok sighed, about to change the subject—

Then, movement outside caught her eye.

She turned her head, glancing through the window just in time to see you rushing toward the caretakers, your face pale, your breathing uneven.

You were crying.

Sae-byeok went still.

You barely even spoke before one of the women gently grabbed your arms, trying to steady you, trying to explain something.

And suddenly, everything clicked.

The little girl.

Yu-jin.

Your sister.

Sae-byeok’s stomach dropped.

She had never asked much about your life. Never pried, never pushed. But she had seen you at this home before. She had known you were visiting someone.

And now, she knew exactly who.

Her heart hammered in her chest as she watched you wipe at your tears, nodding shakily to whatever one of the caretakers was saying before turning toward the emergency vehicle.

Sae-byeok wasn’t sure what she was doing before she was already moving.

Sae-byeok barely spared Cheol a glance as she stood up.

“I gotta go,” she muttered, ruffling his hair quickly before heading for the door.

She ignored the way he called after her, ignored the way her own pulse pounded in her ears.

Because right now, nothing mattered except getting to you.

By the time she stepped outside, you were still standing near the emergency vehicle, your hands shaking as you wiped at your face. The paramedics were already inside, shutting the doors, preparing to drive off.

Sae-byeok barely hesitated before striding up to you.

“What happened?” she asked, her voice sharp but not unkind.

You startled slightly, turning to her with wide, tear-filled eyes. For a second, you just stared at her, like you couldn’t believe she was actually here.

Then, your face crumpled, and you exhaled shakily.

“It’s Yu-jin,” you murmured. “She—she’s been sick for weeks, but I thought—” You swallowed hard, gripping your arms as if to hold yourself together. “She collapsed. They think it’s aplastic anemia.”

Sae-byeok frowned. “What the hell is that?”

“It—it means her bone marrow isn’t making enough blood cells. She’s been pale, getting bruises, getting tired easily…” You inhaled sharply, shaking your head. “I should’ve taken her to a doctor sooner.”

Your voice broke on that last word, and Sae-byeok felt something clench painfully in her chest.

She wasn’t good at this. At comforting people. At knowing what to say.

But fuck, she hated seeing you like this.

So she did the only thing she could.

“Come on,” she said, grabbing your wrist firmly but gently.

You blinked. “What?”

“I’m coming with you.”

You hesitated, your lip trembling. “Sae-byeok, you don’t have to—”

“I know,” she interrupted. “But I’m still going.”

You stared at her for a moment, like you were trying to find a reason to push her away.

But then, something in you gave in.

You nodded.

And without another word, the two of you got into your car and drove to the hospital.

Sae-byeok didn’t let go of your wrist the entire way.

The hospital smelled like antiseptic and something sterile, something cold.

You hated it.

You sat in one of the stiff plastic chairs in the waiting room, your knee bouncing anxiously, your fingers twisting together in your lap. The fluorescent lights above you buzzed faintly, but everything else had faded into white noise.

You could still see Yu-jin in your head—too pale, too small, strapped to a gurney with an oxygen mask over her face as they wheeled her away.

Your stomach twisted.

Beside you, Sae-byeok sat silently, her arms crossed, her expression unreadable.

She hadn’t left your side since you got here.

She hadn’t said much either—not since the nurse had told you that Yu-jin was being stabilized, that a doctor would come speak to you soon.

At first, you weren’t sure why she had come at all.

This wasn’t her problem. She didn’t do emotional support. She didn’t do waiting rooms or hospitals or sitting next to you while you tried to keep from falling apart.

But she was here.

And when your breath hitched, when your fingers clenched into fists against your thighs, she moved.

Wordlessly, her hand slid over yours, her fingers prying yours open, threading through them.

You swallowed hard, your throat tight.

“I’m scared,” you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper.

Sae-byeok exhaled softly, her thumb brushing over your knuckles. “I know.”

You turned to look at her. “She’s all I have.”

Sae-byeok’s jaw tightened slightly, her dark eyes flickering with something you couldn’t quite place.

Then, after a long moment, she squeezed your hand.

“No, she’s not.”

Your lips parted slightly, your pulse stuttering.

Sae-byeok didn’t elaborate.

She just kept holding your hand, grounding you, keeping you tethered to something solid as the minutes dragged by.

The waiting room had never felt so suffocating.

Every second that passed felt like an eternity, stretching thin over the weight pressing against your chest. Sae-byeok’s hand in yours was the only thing keeping you grounded, keeping you from spiraling completely.

Then, finally, the doctor arrived.

She was a middle-aged woman with tired eyes and a clipboard tucked under her arm. She gave you a small, professional smile before sitting down across from you.

“You’re Yu-jin’s guardian?” she asked gently.

You nodded quickly. “Yes. How is she?”

The doctor sighed, folding her hands in her lap. “She’s stable for now, but her condition is serious. Aplastic anemia is rare, but it can be treated. However, it requires aggressive management—blood transfusions, medications, and in severe cases, a bone marrow transplant.”

Your stomach twisted. “A transplant?”

She nodded. “It’s the best chance for a full recovery, but it’s not easy to find a compatible donor. In the meantime, we’ll need to start her on immediate treatments to manage her symptoms.”

Your pulse pounded in your ears. “And… how much will that cost?”

The doctor’s expression softened, as if she had been expecting that question. “That depends. Do you have insurance?”

You opened your mouth—then closed it.

Your fingers curled against your jeans, gripping the fabric tightly. You could feel Sae-byeok watching you, waiting for your answer.

But you didn’t have one.

Because you already knew the truth.

You had nothing. No insurance. No savings. Just barely enough money to scrape by, let alone pay for something as massive as this.

But you couldn’t say that.

Not out loud.

So instead, you swallowed past the lump in your throat and forced a small, polite smile.

“Thank you for your help, doctor,” you murmured.

The woman hesitated, her gaze flickering over you, as if she could see the weight of what you weren’t saying.

But she just nodded. “Of course. I’ll have a nurse bring you the paperwork soon. In the meantime, you can see Yu-jin once she’s moved to a room.”

You nodded stiffly, watching as the doctor stood and walked away.

The second she was gone, you felt Sae-byeok shift beside you.

“You don’t have insurance,” she said flatly.

You inhaled sharply, keeping your eyes on the floor. “I’ll figure something out.”

Sae-byeok didn’t respond right away.

Then, quietly—

“You can’t pay for this, can you?”

Your throat tightened.

You couldn’t look at her.

Because if you did, you’d break.

So instead, you just squeezed your hands into fists, forcing yourself to take a deep breath.

“I’ll figure it out,” you repeated, but the words felt empty.

Because you had no idea how.

Lunch at school was usually loud—full of chatter, laughter, and the occasional shouting match over stolen food.

But at your table, it was quiet.

You barely touched your tray, pushing food around absentmindedly with your chopsticks. Your mind was still at the hospital, still stuck in that suffocating waiting room, still haunted by the sight of Yu-jin lying in that hospital bed, too small, too pale.

Sae-byeok sat across from you, watching.

She had been watching you all morning.

And when she finally spoke, her voice was calm. Steady.

“Here.”

You blinked, looking up just in time to see her slide something across the table toward you.

A thick envelope.

You frowned. “What is this?”

Sae-byeok didn’t answer right away. She just leaned back in her chair, arms crossed, her expression unreadable.

“Take it,” she said simply.

You hesitated, fingers hovering over the envelope before finally picking it up and peeking inside—

And your breath caught.

It was cash.

A lot of cash. Stacks of bills, neatly bundled together, more money than you had ever held in your hands before.

Your stomach twisted. “Sae-byeok…”

“For Yu-jin,” she said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

You shook your head immediately, pushing the envelope back toward her. “No. No, I can’t take this.”

Sae-byeok’s jaw clenched. “You don’t have a choice.”

“Yes, I do!” Your voice was quiet but urgent, pleading. “Sae-byeok, this is your money. You worked for this. I can’t take everything you have—”

“I don’t need it,” she interrupted.

You swallowed, shaking your head again. “Please,” you whispered. “Don’t do this.”

For the first time, something flickered in her expression. Maybe frustration. Maybe something else.

But after a moment, she exhaled, grabbing the envelope and shoving it back into her bag.

“Fine,” she muttered. “I won’t force you.”

You sagged with relief. “Thank you.”

Sae-byeok didn’t say anything.

She just nodded, finishing her food in silence.

You thought that was the end of it.

You thought she had listened.

But you should’ve known better.

Sae-byeok skipped her afternoon classes.

No one stopped her when she slipped out the back of the school, her bag slung over her shoulder, her hood pulled up.

She had a job to do.

Getting to the hospital didn’t take long. She had been there before, knew her way around well enough. And it wasn’t hard to figure out where to go—she had overheard the doctor say Yu-jin’s name, had seen the forms in your hands.

Kim Yu-jin.

When she reached the billing office, she didn’t hesitate.

The receptionist barely glanced up. “Can I help you?”

“I’m here to pay a bill,” Sae-byeok said smoothly, pulling out the envelope of cash and setting it on the counter. “For Kim Yu-jin.”

The receptionist blinked, clearly surprised. “Are you a family member?”

Sae-byeok didn’t even flinch. “Yeah.”

The woman hesitated before nodding, typing something into the computer. “Alright. The family still has a significant balance, but this will cover a large portion of the immediate treatments.”

“Good.”

The receptionist paused, glancing at the cash before looking back at her.

“No questions?” she asked carefully.

Sae-byeok met her gaze, unblinking. "Nope."

You knew something was wrong the moment you walked into the hospital.

The nurse at the front desk greeted you with a polite smile, the kind that only made your stomach twist.

“Good evening, Miss Kim,” she said. “We wanted to let you know that a substantial payment was made toward Yu-jin’s treatment earlier today.”

Your breath caught.

“What?”

The nurse nodded. “Yes, a young woman came in this afternoon. She said she was family and paid in cash.”

Your fingers curled against the counter.

A young woman.

Cash.

No.

No, she wouldn’t—

Your heart pounded as you spun on your heel, barely muttering a thank-you before storming out of the hospital.

You already knew where to find her.

Sae-byeok was leaning against the gate in front of the school when you found her, hands stuffed into her jacket pockets, looking like she didn’t have a care in the world.

But the moment she saw your face, her expression shifted.

You didn’t slow down.

The second you reached her, you shoved at her shoulder—hard.

She barely stumbled, just blinked at you, unimpressed. “What the hell—”

“What did you do?” you hissed.

Sae-byeok exhaled, rolling her eyes. “You already know.”

Your hands clenched into fists at your sides. “I told you not to—”

“And I told you that you didn’t have a choice.”

Your chest tightened. “That wasn’t your decision to make!”

Sae-byeok scoffed. “Yeah? And what was your plan, then? Huh?” She took a step closer, her voice low but sharp. “Just sit around and hope the money magically appears? Let Yu-jin get worse because you’re too fucking proud to accept help?”

You flinched, your throat tightening. “That’s not—”

“She needs treatment,” Sae-byeok snapped. “She needs money. And you don’t have any.”

You swallowed hard, blinking rapidly. “And you do?”

She didn’t answer.

But she didn’t have to.

Because you knew.

You had always known.

Sae-byeok didn’t have a normal job. She didn’t come from money. The cash she had given you—it wasn’t clean.

And she had spent it all on you.

Your eyes burned.

“You shouldn’t have done that,” you whispered.

Sae-byeok’s jaw tightened. “Yeah, well.” She looked away, exhaling sharply. “Too late.”

Something in you cracked.

Because this—this wasn’t how it was supposed to be. You weren’t supposed to need her. You weren’t supposed to owe her.

But now, you did.

And you had no idea how to handle that.

So instead, you just inhaled shakily, shaking your head. “I don’t know how to repay you.”

Sae-byeok studied you for a long moment.

Then, quietly—

“I don’t want your money.”

You swallowed. “Then what do you want?”

She hesitated, her fingers twitching slightly in her pockets.

Then—

“You.”

Your breath hitched.

But before you could even begin to respond, she turned away.

“Come on,” she muttered. “I’ll walk you home.”

And just like that, the conversation was over.

But the weight of her words stayed with you the entire way back.

[lady-griffin]

Did Ekko Make Jinx’s Prosthetic Finger?

I’m curious what other people think, but I don’t think Jinx made her prosthetic finger. The only thing about it that screams JINX to me is the painted smiley face. That’s it.

It’s far too practical and simple of a design to be made by Jinx; seriously, if you remove the smiley face, you wouldn’t be able to tell this was her finger.

By comparison - Fishbones was a complete and total surprise to me when I first watched Arcane and yet I didn't question his existence for a single second; because of course Jinx made a giant shark bazooka. That makes perfect sense given everything we know about her.

With this finger though, I’m like... maybe she made it under these specific circumstances, but even then, I doubt it, because she’s so committed to her aesthetic.

She consistently goes all out, even when there's no reason to.

She individually painted each of her moth bombs, you know the things designed for the sole purpose of exploding. And yet, I'm supposed to believe she made her own finger and only drew a smiley face on it?! Really?!

Are we sure we’re talking about Jinx?

Jinx’s two guns from S1 are her most practical and aesthetically simple designs and even they have more flourish, I mean one’s pink for fuck’s sake.

So, if Jinx didn’t make her own finger, then who did?

Ekko!!

He's the only one who makes sense to me.

Now maybe this is just my delusional Timebomb wishing heart, it's certainly a possibility, but looking over the Firelights’ hoverboards, accessories, and home, Jinx’s prosthetic finger doesn’t look out of place.

There’s no perfect match to Jinx's finger; but overall, the design itself, plus the color and the specific way the metal looks worn and is clearly repurposed – looks very Ekko/Firelights to me.

To be clear, beaten up or repurposed anything (especially metal) is not an Ekko only thing, not by a long shot, as it’s found throughout Zaun.

It is Zaun.

Still, the way Ekko and Jinx’s aesthetics come through their designs and inventions, usually makes them very identifiable and this finger looks far more like Ekko, than it does Jinx. Even the color says Ekko to me.

Neither one exclusively uses a single color/type of metal, but Jinx tends to favor metals that are grey, while Ekko favors more bronze or coppery colored metals - like Jinx's finger.

The color is by no means a smoking gun, it’s just this bit of extra oddness.

It already felt super odd the design is so simple and practical but on top of that - she also didn't opt for her usual grey metals? Even in the smallest of details, this finger doesn’t feel like Jinx; and Arcane is so specific and detail oriented with its designs.

Now, obviously Ekko is not the only other inventor in Zaun, but I can't see Jinx using something just anyone made, let alone a new body part. Maybe she would for practicality’s sake, but as soon as she could, she would either customize it to her own aesthetic or just make her own.

She's so specific and intentional with her everything, so why would she make an exception for her new finger; something that's going to be attached to her body and used by her for a decently long time.

The fact this design seems to be Jinx's permanent new finger makes me assume whoever made it, did a good enough job that it met Jinx’s standards and they're important enough to her she was content to just draw a cute little smiley face on it and nothing more.

And right now, I only see Ekko being that person.

Also, I just think it would be really cute and sweet. Seriously, think about it –

Jinx: Look at what my boyfriend made me! *Gives you the middle finger*

[2headedb0y]

Setting this account up to track progress on a male yandere rpg/"dating sim" hybrid otome game I recently started developing: 2-Headed Boy. Story-driven/choice-driven gameplay with exploration and various activities.

You can wish list a 2-headed boy of your own today 🤍

Development began January 2025.

Current stage: Production (stage 2)

Estimated overall completion: 15%

Game is not suitable for children. People with severe relationship trauma might proceed with caution. Also contains flashing lights.

Content warnings: toxic relationship, manipulation, gaslighting, various forms of blackmail, love bombing, verbal 4bus3, stalking, obsessive behavior, s3lf harm, e4ting d1s0rder, guilt tripping, violence, d34th, drug 4bus3, character backstory references to chi1d 4bus3.

Donation/Store Page Info:

Donor List (to appear in game credits):

abrokecupoftea

Lex

Dotchi

NanaWaltz

Total donations to date: $105

Donor tiers (listed in USD). All tiers will be offered the tiers below it as well! For example, tier 3 will also be offered the items from tiers 1 and 2.

If you make multiple donations adding up to a certain tier you will unlock that reward (does not have to be all at once; for example if you repeatedly donate $5 and hit $15 I will then offer you the Tier 2 item)

Tier 1 threshold - $5 - name in credits

Tier 2 threshold - $15 - Special in-game item (cosmetic only; does not give any player advantage on gameplay) +Tier 1

Tier 3 threshold - $30 - Small 3x3" Yandere "Fragile" Magnet + Tiers 1 and 2

Tier 4 threshold - $60 - 11oz Yandere "Fragile" Coffee Mug + Tiers 1, 2, and 3 (I don't really expect donations this high, it just happened once and I made a mug for it so I have to include it here lol)

Tangible items (from Tiers 3 and 4) can be purchased directly from my Ko-Fi shop and will automatically include tiers below them. Tier 2 coming to the shop soon as a digital item!

If you want donate for the Tier 1 (name in credits), you can follow this link below!

Story and gameplay concepts below! vvv

You have been staying in Japan after traveling there for a highly advanced medical procedure. Your only friend, Koyomi, sees how isolated you have become here, and is encouraging you to get into dating. She offers to introduce you to the sweet, normal, well-adjusted single guys she knows in your apartment complex. But for whatever reason, she doesn't seem to want you to meet Kage, your next-door neighbor.

"There's something really off about him. If you decide to talk to him, obviously I can't stop you. Just...please be careful. He's really...fragile."

Every choice you make with/towards your yandere neighbor will have a disproportionately larger impact on him than all the other dating "options," for better or worse. Also, be careful about the other "options." Every choice you make with them also affects Kage.

Build your guys' stats through interactions and cute dates. Figure out what they like and make them cute gifts. Witness Kage become increasingly unhinged and navigate the fallout of his wacky antics.

What you say, do, don't say or don't do all matter. Especially to your yandere!

Why has he latched on to you so tightly? Reach the "true ending" to find out, along with answers to other questions raised along the way.

Choose your name, gender, and appearance. Choose your birthday for some fun birthday surprises. Choose your guy, or guys. But remember Koyomi's advice: be really careful with Kage. He's fragile.

[redhoodinternaldialectical]

Every time I learn something new about Batman: War Games I lose my mind a little bit more cause just, just fuckin, look okay so here's the thing:

Stephanie Brown tries to implement a contingency plan of Bruce's just after he fires her from being Robin and because of that gets tortured to (almost) death and no one knows she survived.

THIS STORY RUNS IN THE NEWS:

So, you know, anyone who might be paying even half a fucking ounce of attention to news about ROBINS would definitely absolutely notice this!!!

And then very very soon afterwards Jason comes back and specifically targets Black Mask to ruin the criminal empire he tortured Stephanie to get

As a way to torment Bruce about the fact that he doesn't take care of the nastiest criminals and they continue killing people

And how Jason should have been the last to die

and SOMEHOW

these two things are in no way related and Jason has nothing to do with or say about Stephanie Brown, fellow Robin, fellow martyred soldier, fellow child dead due to Bruce related villains.

HOLY DEAD SIDEKICKS BATMAN, DO YOU COMPREHEND THE MAGNITUDE OF MISSED OPPORTUNITIES HERE????

please walk with me down a timeline in which:

Lost Days Jason at first just tries to go after the Joker and can't because who he's really mad at is Bruce.

Then he sees Who Really Killed Stephanie Brown and the utter horror of another Robin dying on Bruce's watch (not just dying, but tortured to death!) is what convinces him to try to straight up kill Bruce via car bomb

Roman Sionis is no longer merely a tool against Batman, but another figure to demand vengeance be brought upon, another attempt to give Bruce a chance to right his wrongs and do what needs to be done

The confrontation with him and the Joker being all the more tragic due to how obvious Bruce's answer would have to be once Jason knows Bruce isn't going to avenge Stephanie either

Does Jason, once he escapes the rubble after UtRH is over, kill Black Mask anyways? Does he decide to avenge her himself? Or does he think that she too would demand that of Bruce, and find his death by a different hand unsatisfactory?

If he doesn't kill Black Mask, then when Steph is back, I feel confident he approaches her, tries to reach out to the other dead Robin, almost certainly makes the offer now that he can ask her. Does she take him up on it, gaining an ally and slipping into a far darker role? Does she instead refuse, either appealing to forgiveness or far more interestingly refusing both vengeance and forgiveness? How would Jason handle a refusal, which I gut instinct feel is more likely?

If he does kill Black Mask, then when Steph is back Jason drops his corpse at her feet like a loving housecat with a dead lizard and she has to grapple with her feelings about having someone really and truly avenge her!!! Like how DO you react to someone who you have been warned is wildly dangerous and mentally unstable coming up to you and saying, "I'm glad you're back, like me. I'm sorry you're back, like me. I made sure you could rest knowing he was dead, because I know what it feels like."

Like no matter how each character reacted to this happening there would be so much high stakes emotional shit to explore with both of them!! Revenge I feel like is such a pivotal thing for both characters, they mirror each other in so so many ways, they could be really interesting together if DC would just fucking let them!!!

Jason had a criminal father who he missed and wanted to avenge. Stephanie had a criminal father who she wanted vengeance on.

Jason started off as a fairly gentle soul who progressively became more violent and more hopeless as he was exposed to genuine horrors during his time as Robin. Stephanie starts off violent, angry and rash and finds her own courage and hope through her time as a crime fighter despite of the horrors she's been through.

Jason went to Africa and died there after Bruce failed to save him. Stephanie was taken to Africa via a fake death in order to save her from Bruce and the vigilante lifestyle.

I just...

There's just...

There's SO MUCH HERE I am genuinely fucking confused as to how this is not all deliberate?? And it's all just left on the cutting room floor because for no reason apparent to me they all just decided Stephanie and Jason were not gonna interact!

AAGHHHH!

[theotherbuckley]

Im in love with this fic and i need more

🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵

You're an amazing writer btw 🩷🪱

Thank you! I'm glad people are liking this fic 🥰

Here's 900 more words just for you <3

🦵 - Buck and Tommy meet at physio after the truck bombing

Tommy isn’t there at his next physio appointment — now only seeing his physiotherapist once every two weeks, unlike Buck who still has to see her every week. The session feels slower than normal; it always does when he’s alone. Bobby promised him that next time he would be able to come with, but today, there’s no one, not even Tommy, to chat with afterwards. 

Dr Mistry seems to sense his subdued mood and has taken to being far more cheerful than he can ever recall.

“Why are you so happy?” he asks, slumping down into his chair after she had given his leg a deep and rather unpleasant massage. 

Dr Mistry turns to him, shooting him a look which he doesn’t care to decipher. “You are quiet. It’s unsettling.”

Buck opens his mouth, closes it, and opens it again, staring at his doctor. “Hey, I don’t talk that much.”

“You haven’t even complained one time.”

And okay, that’s fair, but still. 

“I’m just tired,” Buck tells her. It’s not even a lie. He is tired. He’s always tired. He’s just a little spacey today. He’s been feeling quite defeated lately. Sometimes, it feels like all of his hard work is for nothing. His leg still aches like bitch whenever the weather changes, and he only just managed to complete the full length of the bar unaided last session, far behind where he should have been at this point. He’s trying so hard to get better, to work again, but it doesn’t matter how much effort he puts in, it’s never enough. He’s never enough. 

And when there’s nobody with him to tell his brain to shut up, he gets stuck inside his head, and he doesn’t quite know how to get out of it. 

It’s exhausting. 

So he’s tired. He really, really is. 

It’s just a type of tiredness that he doesn’t think he can recover from. Not until his leg is recovered, at least. 

Dr Mistry looks at him for a moment, her eyes scanning over his face, hyperanalysing his expressions as though she can see right down into his soul, see all of those helpless thoughts running around in his head. “There’s doctors for that,” she says, and Buck doesn’t have to ask what she means. 

“I don’t need therapy,” Buck says back, a little too defensively. He’s probably lying, but he doesn’t want to see anyone. He’s fine. He will be. It just takes time, isn’t that what everyone keeps saying?

“It’s not healthy to keep everything stuck inside. Sometimes it is good to let it all out,” she continues, ignoring his slight outburst. 

“I have people. It’s just— It’s hard when they’re not around.”

She nods in understanding but hands him a card anyway. “Just think about it.”

He takes the card begrudgingly and sticks it in his wallet, where he knows he’s not going to touch it again. He doesn’t need help. He just needs to be able to walk— to work. He’ll be fine after that. 

As soon as he gets home, he takes the card out of his wallet and stares at it. 

And then he texts Tommy. 

Buck: Have you ever seen a therapist?

Tommy: Hi Tommy how are you

I’m great thank you for asking

Buck: Yeah yeah

Answer the question

Tommy: I have

Buck: And? 

My doctor wants me to see one

But I don’t want to

Especially not after last time

I’m not that guy anymore

Tommy: Not what guy?

Buck: Not the guy who sleeps with his therapist

Tommy: I’m not sure if I should ask

Buck: Probably best

So..?

Tommy: Therapy helped me

I wasn’t a great guy before

Buck almost scoffs at his phone. Tommy the guy who drove him home and helped him up multiple flights of stairs, whilst injured, on their first meeting, wasn’t a good guy?

Buck: You? Be honest

Tommy: I wasn’t

Turns out repressing my sexuality and listening to what my father taught me is not a good combination

Hurt a lot of people because of it

But therapy helped

I’m comfortable being myself now

Buck has to pause at that. It’s not like there’s anything wrong with it, he just didn’t really expect it. Maybe that’s not a good thing to say. He’s an ally, actually. The rainbow flag in his bio every June proves that. 

Buck: Wait

You’re gay?

Tommy: I am, yeah. Is that a problem?

Buck: No of course not! Men are hot.

Tommy: Mmhmm  

Buck: So you think I should do it?

Tommy: Do what?

Buck: See a therapist

Tommy: I don’t know, Evan

That’s up to you

But if your doctor suggested it, maybe you should listen

Buck: And I don’t need to sleep with them?

Tommy: You definitely do not.

Even after the conversation, Buck can’t bring himself to dial the number on the card. His stomach rumbles after a while, and Buck looks at his watch, mildly surprised to find it past 3 pm. He drops the card on the coffee table, and hobbles to the kitchen with his cane to make himself some food. 

When he sits back down, his mind is focused on queer history, and he finds himself googling pride and forgetting all about therapy. It wasn’t like he needed it anyway.

[cursedvida]

It's really crazy to me to see the hate Mae gets, like I was reading some reviews and I can understand not liking a character but as soon as they start with the name calling their opinion is invalid to me because they have no reason to be calling her a bitch, among other things, like it just reeks of mysogyny, (it's like they just want an excuse to call women names) and seeing it coming from other girls makes it worse like..

"Oh the girl was such a bitch why did she do that 🙄" ..is it really that hard to think for a moment about the circumstances in which mae was raised?? Do they need it spell it out for them?? Like, c'mon guys do you really think that the people trapped in a bunker for generations have anything nice to teach/say about the apes?? Wes Ball please give us Mae's backstory in the sequel!! Your audience needs it bc they are out there calling Mae the real villain and saying Proximus was right 💀 (when he was literally everything Caesar hated in an ape)

Look, I'm usually a polite person when expressing my opinions, but I'm fed up with the hate towards Mae, basically because the arguments people give seem incredibly basic to me, typical of people with little to no understanding. Sometimes I doubt if these people have watched the same movie as me or maybe they have some sort of cognitive dissonance, but seriously, I find them ridiculous. Either that, or they are basically the typical comments from misogynistic guys or women with internalized misogyny who can't stand morally gray and questionable female characters.

And well, having said that, I'm going to present my doctoral thesis on this topic:

One of the things I've seen the most is people saying that Mae is evil, the true villain, or an ungrateful traitor to Noa. This argument seems quite incomprehensible to me because, even though we don't have much data about her, I believe there's something very important that explains why she acts as she does: the Proximus apes killed the people in her group, including her mother. I mean: her damn mother. If we add to that the UNDERSTANDING (I mean, you have to be very short-minded not to assume something so obvious) that she has been raised in an environment where they've probably told her all her life that the apes are the reason for all the evils of humanity and the main reason why humans live in shitty conditions, I think anyone with half a brain has enough information to understand why she does what she does.

Yes, Noa is a good guy, but he's not helping her. Noa and Mae have a common goal and decide to ally themselves momentarily to achieve that goal, which is to reach Proximus. As much as they've formed a bond throughout the story, it's not yet strong enough for Mae to set aside what she has worked for so hard. Mae not only bears the weight of humanity on her shoulders but also emotionally carries the idea that she, as the sole survivor of her group, must complete the mission at all costs. Are those who criticize her telling me that if they truly thought that with certain actions they could not only save their species but also honor their loved ones who have been killed infront their eyes, they wouldn't do them? And that they wouldn't do them for someone they've just met, no matter how much they like them? That's just not realistic, it makes no sense. We would all do the same as Mae in her situation. I mean, I have no doubts.

Another thing I love is when they say she's the "true villain" as if it weren't clear enough that she feels bad every time since she forms a bond with Raka and Noa when she does something that she knows may harm them. She feels pain for Raka's death and clearly, you can also see the conflict and remorse when she detonates the bomb. It's not something she enjoys doing, but she HAS to do it. In the final scene, even though she's carrying a gun, you can also clearly see her in conflict with herself. Clearly, she doesn't want to kill him. Clearly, she has nothing against Noa, and this is evident when she finally accepts the necklace and they even shake hands. You can't tell me that's the attitude of a villain, narratively it's not presented as such, and seeing it that way is to have understood nothing.

Mae is a complex character whose life is based on survival, she's no different from the characters we're used to loving and idolizing in other post-apocalyptic series, the difference here for me is that she's human and humans have to be bad by default and also that she's a woman. Because female characters always have to be the support, the romantic interest, or the unconditional friends of heroic male characters, and Mae is none of that. Mae is a character with her own story and ambitions that go beyond Noa's plot. Mae has her own plot, and it seems that's something that bothers people a lot.

I'm sorry, but the hate towards Mae seems very similar to the one people had for Sansa Stark in Game of Thrones, which basically stemmed from people being misogynistic and hating complex and imperfect female characters, combined with how much they hate seeing protagonist characters with such human and real characteristics that they can't bear the idea of seeing themselves reflected in them.

But hey, for Sansa Stark, I would have killed, and now for Mae too. Mae haters basically DNI

[blessphemy]

Heehee, I'm really enjoying the mystery of all the seemingly disconnected things you tag as 'translation state.' You're making me want to read it <3

i'm hoping to create my translation state quotes hall of fame post soon, this book is actually a situational comedy masquerading as a political thriller star crossed romance with alien cannibalism garnish. you know, normal stuff.

i would recommend reading Ancillary Justice first though! first book in the Imperial Radch trilogy. then the rest of the trilogy, Ancillary Sword and Ancillary Mercy. i am dead serious i think the Imperial Radch trilogy is a modern sci fi classic, building on the sci fi canon that comes before it in such a fantastic way. Ancillary Justice is an absolutely beautifully put together work, master craft shit. no notes. (I do have notes on the structure of Translation State.) i have literally studied AJ's structure like I'm trying to dissect it and it's insanely clean. I can only think of like, maybe 1 thing I'd like to ask the author about regarding her choice of how she executed the ending. Leckie did you have Breq shoot the gun without public witnesses because it would've fucked up the logistics of the rest of a trilogy? part of me can't help but think the ending of AJ would've worked better as a final public showdown and it highkey felt like that's what it was building toward until—but on the other hand the ending as written mirrors the hidden situation with Awn so perfectly—anyway it makes me rabid.

GOD oh my god that scene with Lieutenant Awn (iykyk) when Awn dropped her mic on Anaander and then Anaander dropped her mic on Awn and I knew what was coming next and the whole arc of the book all clicked together right in the beating heart of the story I about screamed I had to put the book down and pace it out for a while before picking it back up.

the Imperial Radch trilogy punched its entire fist through my brain and i never truly recovered. it was everything i wanted. if you let me start talking about it i won't shut up for about 30-45 minutes minimum. it can be a little dense and I gather the tone/style is not for everyone but boy fuckin' howdy does it hit for the people it hits. every single character is my problematic fave. every single character is fucking unhinged in their own special way. <3 (except Queter. who may have built a bomb but she did nothing wrong ever in her life.)

Provenance and Translation State are in the same universe as the trilogy, but follow (mostly) different casts of characters. i suppose you could read Translation State first if you feel like a rebel, and I'd be fascinated to hear how it reads without the prior context. but also I really think it would land better if you read the trilogy first.