#she does at-home care for disabled & elderly people

[lazlolullaby]

"Nurse" Terry AU

i mean a reboot of Terry Mcginnis being a home medical assistant for elder care.

Not the grimdark cop out twist, "lol Bruce was Crazy the whole time, the doctors were his rogues gallery" but. Mundane elder care for the man who fought too hard for this city to even consider he would live to old age. + Bonus medical support for the future Batfamily.

TL:Dr Terry as Alfred's successor. Caring of people that have made/continually make dangerous choices, dry wit, checkered past, willing to kill, etc. He just needs time to grow into it.

More details under the cut, accidentally evolved into a not fic:

Bruce already has a partial caretaker in Alfred, and he's not going to live forever, despite all of the fandom jokes otherwise.

I'm thinking Bruce is 70, so Dick and Barbara would be 50s, Jason and Cass 45, Tim, Duke, and Stephanie 40s, and Damian is 35. Titus was replaced with a few other service dogs before Ace.

Maybe it's like Batman Beyond where Bruce drove everyone away. Maybe the Golden Age of Heroes wound down, with his contemporaries either dying or leaving him alone to stand vigil.

Maybe it's not. When his kids are grown with their lives and vigilantes or not, they can't be there 24/7 for Bruce.

I prefer the Batfamily is around, just that they have their own lives. Someone is always in the Manor in the mornings, but when Vigilante things happen, someone has to be home to make sure Bruce doesn't go out as well.

Bruce, thanks to his vigilante history, has heart issues, bone and joint issues, canon Childhood PTSD compounding with complex Vigilante PTSD, and bad reactions to drugs and medications thanks to all of the Chemical Attacks.

Bruce is still good at his ADLs (Activities of Daily Life). Things like walking without assistance, eating, showering, putting on clothes, and going to the bathroom.

He's gotten denture implants and is doing physical therapy enough to walk with a cane. He can't open jars, but he can still zip and button.

He's retired but still runs the Cave. He's mostly fine, but sometimes the Bats see him struggle. Someone finds him at the bottom of the stairs, unable to get up and refusing to say when he fell. Dick puts his foot down when Bruce has a heart attack.

The batfamily makes up a rotation sheet, but it's not enough. Vigilante first aid is different from elderly medical aid. Not to mention the mental and emotional toll that it's taking, seeing their parent/leader disabled and crabby as hell.

(also. Untrained family members who care for Alzheimer's patients by themselves have a severe risk of cutting their life short due to stress. Use the insurance. Get help.)

So they get Bruce a fully trained nurse assistant to check in every other day for the midmorning and a first aid assistant for the night time. And they'll keep rotation at "vigilante time" 9-9. It's flexible, he doesn't need them all of the time.

So about Terry. Despite everything, it's still Gotham. His family was held up at gunpoint after a trip to the movies. The gun does go off.

But it's also a Gotham with several active vigilantes.

The response was quick enough that only Warren was hit, and the gun was knocked on the ground fast enough so Mary was physically fine. They get taken to the hospital. Mary might remember which vigilante. Terry might need to see pictures.

Warren's insurance plan with Wayne-Powers is pretty great, he's off on disability for a few months. And Mary is pregnant, so as she was progressing she can't lift or help with heavy things. Terry tries to help. He's getting well versed in getting snacks, waters, basic house chores done, but he's only 8. There's no grandparents or extended family to call.

So they apply for help. The insurance sends a home medical assistant to come around a few days a week. And Terry sees how much it helps. How much of a burden that it lifts, how everyone in the house can breathe a little easier. That sticks with him.

When the insurance runs out and they still need help, Mary calls the support card that the Vigilantes gave her. They get a second volunteer (maybe a cousin of his highschool group? Chelsea or Dana?) that also helps.

The worst is over, Warren is safely back to work + working from home to help out, Mary is fully recovered, and baby Matt is perfectly healthy.

And Terry is restless. Energy spent worrying about his family and taking care of them is churning in him. He's lost some time with his friends and is feeling isolated.

The cracks become apparent in the parents marriage, it gets tense at home.

The second volunteer comes around sometimes to babysit him and Matt while Mary and Warren are "working their relationship out". They tell him about the community center that sets people up with job training and temp healthcare jobs like this. Activities for the neighborhood kids after school.

Luckily and unluckily, that's where Terry gets recruited into the Red Hood gang.

Jason isn't really using kids for gang things. Well. Keeping them as look outs, making them deliver care packages to the homeless/protected witnesses, maybe ferrying a little naloxone here and there to his addiction rehab centers. They know what they're doing is illegal, but it also helps the community. Terry is pretty content with that most of the time. Most of the time.

And then Charlie had to get it in his head he's going "Big Time", riles Terry up, and make them go off plan.

Terry and Charlie get caught, they get booked in Juvenile hall. They don't say anything, don't reveal about Red Hood's movements. (Not that Jason would tell any kids anything like that.)

Terry got out, his parents officially split, he went with his Dad, his Mom took his younger brother. Now that he doesn’t have Matt, he can’t go back to his gang friends, his parents don’t trust him, people are hesitant to trust him, he’s getting frustrated again.

The Bats are also...more focused on the Gotham villainy side of things, not the company. Dick never got a business degree so he can't really do anything, not that he was interested, Jason is dead + his civilian alias is handling Crime Ally, Tim is burnt out of CEO duties and recovering in R&D, and Damian tried, but he was frustrated in following his father's footsteps, so that was stopped.

Derek Powers is still a thing but not all "glowy". Warren brought up the weapons file + discrepancy to Tim, so Terry's dad is safe (for now).

So Jason sees this kid who wants to help but just needs to be mentored and his act cleaned up. And Bruce, who's a little bit listless and needs a project that won't be too taxing.

So the Batfamily talks and throws them together.

BUT ALSO - fun storylines:

Derek Powers tries to kill Bruce through his medical assistants. He's a manipulator, also trying to get Terry for cheap, but Terry isn't biting. Terry checking the medicine before giving it to Bruce and finding it wasn't the usual. (Bruce knew, but he also wanted to make sure no one was slacking.) IDK if the day nurse/pharmacy tech got turned by Powers but Terry was planned to take the fall.

Bruce subtly training him in stealth tactics and strategy. The rest of the Batfamily getting in on it too.

Terry was able to clock that "Father Peterson", a pillar of the Crime Alley Community, was a civilian alias of Red Hood. (Peterson checked in on him in juvie. His foot stance is similar to Red Hood, the cadence when he's talking with his goons slips, their morals don't directly align but do intersect, people thought they were grudging allies, but if they're the same person it tracks.) Terry does further digging and connects the deceased Jason Todd-Wayne's old photos to Peterson, but realizes, "oh. There's reasons why he doesn't involve his rich family", and decides not to bring it up.

Maybe finding an actual CEO replacement for Wayne-Powers? Stephanie could pull a Cinderella rags to riches story. Or have the Fox family come back? Tam or Luke?

Terry following Bruce down to the Batcave a couple months in. "Sure. A nerd Collection." But not actually believing that it's the Batfamily base until he sees the collection of suits. When the family shows up after patrol he just shrugs, "you told me stick by him."

[asinglesock]

unemployment arc update

[dandelionsresilience]

Dandelion News - October 1-7

Like these weekly compilations? Tip me at $kaybarr1735 or check out my Dandelion Doodles on Patreon!

1. Arctic ozone reaches record high in positive step for climate

“Above-average ozone levels continued to persist through September 2024. This is significant as, previously, spring has been associated with ozone depletion[….] The March 2024 ozone average peaked at 477 Dobson units (DU), which is 6 DU higher than the previous record in March 1979 and 60 DU higher than the average for the study period (1979 to 2023).”

2. Why Massachusetts loves Nibi the beaver and [won the fight] to keep her out of the wild

“Nibi, now 2 years old, is roughly the age when wild beavers embark on their journey to find a mate and build a home. [… But] if Nibi is released in October, she would be ill-prepared for the winter[…. The governor has] issued a permit for Nibi to remain at a wildlife rescue as an educational beaver and inspire folks to protect our natural world."”

3. In Madagascar, Taniala Regenerative Camp aims to heal deforestation scars

“Residents of the villages around Lambokely manage the nursery and market garden crops. “Local communities receive training in agroecology and agroforestry, benefit from improved soil fertility, and earn additional income from intercropping in the agroforestry plots. In addition, community members are incentivized to participate in tree-planting activities.””

4. Tunica-Biloxi Tribe of Louisiana Breaks Ground on $6.4 Million Affordable Housing Project

“The project’s first phase will create three-bedroom homes designed for multiple purposes, including elderly housing, emergency shelter, and support for displaced and low-income Tribal citizens. These homes will be built to meet Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) standards, ensuring accessibility for all.”

5. Scientists say painting roofs this colour could save lives: How does it keep cities cool?

“[Researchers] found that cool, light-coloured roofs installed across all of London’s roofs could have cooled the city by around 0.8C [in 2018]. [… Solar panels] could have cooled the city by around 0.3C, preventing the deaths of 96 people [… while generating] more than half the energy [used by] London during the entire year of 2018.”

6. Travis County [TX] opens center to help keep people experiencing a mental health crisis out of jail

“The walk-in urgent care facility is open 24/7 and provides immediate support for people experiencing mental health crises. From there, some patients may be referred to a residential facility[… where] patients will be able to stay for up to 90 days[….] Jailed individuals may also work with their legal teams to coordinate admission to the facility.”

7. Spain’s first transgender soccer team makes debut in regional men’s league

“A soccer team consisting entirely of transgender men has[…] become the first all-trans squad to achieve federated status in Europe. […] Spain passed a pioneering trans rights bill last year designed to make it easier to change a person’s legal gender identity. […] Players may also choose to use a name that’s different from their legal one[….]”

8. Green Status of Species: Pushing Conservation Ambitions Beyond Preventing Extinction

“[… T]he Green Status of Species [is] a new part of Red List assessments that helps tell “a species’ full conservation story.” […] In addition to quantifying species recovery, the Green Status of Species […] will help to better inform future conservation actions by shedding light on which past actions have contributed most to species recovery.”

9. Hell froze over in Texas – the state will connect to the US grid for the first time via a fed grant

“[The projects will] boost grid reliability, lower energy costs, and support the clean energy transition. […] They’ll also generate nearly 9,000 jobs, supporting local economies[…. In particular, the Texas portion is] designed to prevent outages like the ones during Winter Storm Uri that hit Texas hard in 2021.”

10. Pine martens released to be reintroduced to Devon

“Work to release 15 pine martens into woods across Dartmoor has been completed[….] The eight females and seven males have all been fitted with a radio collars to allow their movements to be tracked. […] They were kept in soft-release pens for three days to get them used to their surroundings before being allowed to run wild, staff said.”

September 22-28 news here | (all credit for images and written material can be found at the source linked; I don’t claim credit for anything but curating.)

[sparepartshere]

KARASUNO THIRD YEAR ANGST HEADCANONS

TW: abuse, neglect, suicide attempt, self harm, depression, illness, ableism, homophobia, transphobia, alcoholism, drug abuse, death of loved ones, panic attacks

DAICHI: - his father is frankly an alcoholic and likely on types of drug more often than not. - he’s made it his job to keep the man away from his younger siblings, though that means that he takes far more punishments so they don’t have to - his father is lowkey abusive towards him, especially since he found out Daichi was queer (bisexual transmale) - mental health isn’t the best but he ignores that - has considered self harm multiple times and scares himself with how dark the thoughts get some nights - emotionally unavailable often, not at all connected with his feelings and emotions - was taught from a really young age that showing emotions (esp negative ones) showed weakness - his mother died when he was a kid, and his stepmother is either oblivious or ignores how his father treats him - he resents her for this although she’s never actually done anything directly to him - probably has undiagnosed AuDHD - doesn’t have many medical resources available for things like his asthma and his joint issues - doesn’t entirely understand Asahi’s anxiety as he was raised in a way that didn’t allow him to show any form of fear so he just pushes his own away - this has caused many arguments between the two because he just can’t understand Asahi’s point of view - ^^^ absolutely hates this - insomniac - doesn’t sleep well/at all for days on end and it really affects his mental health and mood, it’s more obvious to others than he realises - refuses to ask others for help or open up to them, even when he desperately needs it. suga had to force daichi to open up about sometimes the smallest things - skips meals often - doesn’t think he ‘needs’ them - ^^ his weight is one of his biggest insecurities - he had an eating disorder throughout part of junior hight - yui and hayato monitored what he ate for weeks after they found out

KOUSHI: - has two present parents but isn’t that close with them - his father cares more for his work than his family. his mother tries her hardest to be fair to them both but she fails often in koushi’s eyes - loves his younger brother but hates how he partially resents him for always being his parents favourite - his brother has a lot of medical issues so his mother always doted over him and left koushi in the care of his elderly grandmother - when his grandmother passed his parents hardly acknowledged it and he found that infuriating - used to overwork himself to be the top of his class in school to get his parents to notice him more (they never did) - continues to overwork himself throughout high school for any form of validation - always exerted himself in social situations and built a large social life for himself to avoid being at home and to not feel ignored - daichi and asahi were the first friends he made where he actually felt seen - his father is lowkey homophobic but only shows it behind closed doors in off-handed comments - ^^ his father cares about his reputation more than his family - his main worries and impacts on his mental health started during first year when he realised how bad Asahi and Daichi’s were - he was so scared over them hurting themselves or worse - genuinely didn’t know what to do and ended up having his first panic attack over it and several more

ASAHI: - his father passed in an accident before he was born, his mother passed away from an illness a few years later - was raised by his much older (by 11 years) sister - his sister doesn’t have any mental/mental health issues/disabilities. if their parents were still alive she would have been a glass child - often wanders what it would be like if he actually did have parents - absolutely hates mothers’/fathers’ day, and days at school where people bring in their parents. (always does something with his sister on mothers’ day without fail) - feels really guilty over how his sister had to raise him instead of living her years as a young adult - his sister works abroad most of the year, so he spends most of his time alone - was very lonely as a child - struggled to make friends his whole life, and was pretty severely bullied most of his life too - this bullying only stopped in highschool after Daichi and Suga ‘adopted’ him - ^^ this quickly turned into rumours rather than bullying - the rumours really get under his skin and affect how he sees himself (doesn’t like how he looks anymore, already low self worth plummeted) - used to self harm throughout the end of his junior high years and the beginning of high school. quitting was much harder than he had expected. - attempted in his first year at some point, everything just got too much for him and he needed it to stop. he overdosed on sleeping pills. It didn’t work, he woke up disoriented and sore hours later. He didn’t plan on telling anyone until Daichi and Suga forced him to open up. - the time he took off from volleyball he also took off from school in general. it was a longer depressive episode. - the comments he got after returning, even if they were just jokes, really got to him - to the point where he questioned coming back the next day or ever - he hates how daichi can’t understand his anxiety even though he knows it’s not daichi’s fault. he hates even more how there are some days he resents him for it

[parasolyaa]

give me rtc character hcs for being in the subway for the first time

i love how this implies that they’ve never been in the subway before. well, since most of them almost never left uranium, this checks.

ocean — she always advocated for public transportation (and for some reason believed it wasn’t widely used, probably because she assumed everyone could use a car and subway was for noble people who cared for the environment), but if she ever went to a big city, she never stayed there for long, and usually walked by foot. when she actually used the subway for the first time, she decided to hand out flyers that said something like “thank you for choosing public transit! here are some other ways you can help the planet (…)”. ended up absolutely overwhelmed and in a taxi, wiping tears with the flyers no-one seemed to like. wonder why.

noel — romanticized the shit out of paris metropolitan, said he researched all about it and prided himself on being more knowledgeable of it than a local. when he got to go to france (probs a family/school trip when he was a teen) he bought an overpriced graphic t-shirt with the metropolitan map and confidently entered the underground. immediately got disappointed it wasn’t all gothic catacombs, and accidentally sat on a wrong train. had to take off his t-shirt and figure out where he was, and after two hours of being chest naked in the french underground and hopping from one wrong train to another even wronger train a kind passer-by pointed out that the print on his tee was of marseille, not paris. he spent an extra hour figuring out the correct map and asking for directions in broken french (the locals despised him). he entirely missed the drag show he waited for, and ever since then grew to hate the french underground.

mischa — is in on a ukrainian inside joke about metro in odesa. successfuly convinced all choir that there’s metro in odesa. there is no metro in odesa.

there’s also a ukrainian book called toreadors from vasyukivka, where two boys want to build a metro in their village, so they dig a big hole in their yard and a cow accidentally falls into it. safe to say their idea doesn’t stick. at some point these boys get to kyiv and immediately get lost in metro there. that’s 100% mischa. he did this i was the cow.

also he always finds ways not to pay for his ride: jumps over the tourniquet’s, crawls under them, squeezes in with a person in front of him etc. sometimes gets extremely bored and hides in a train wagon when it reaches the final stop, and stays in it when it goes to depo.

ricky — his parents drove him everywhere by car, and told the tales about toronto subway being inaccessible, dangerous and full of freaks. he never believed them. at some point (maybe in a trip with the choir) he got to travel by subway himslef. it was, in fact, a bit of an unpleasant experience, but he found out that it sucks on his own terms and was lowkey proud.

also he was listening to some cringefail furry music (i do not know if furry music is a thing but it will be now) and realised his earphones disconnected and he was blasting it to everyone only after he got home.

penny — had a secret hiding spot in toronto subway where she could keep her things and return to see them intact. she and ezra hid there often and spied on people, sometimes picking up what fell out of their purses — like pieces of candy or pennies (get it? penny? pennies? penis?). they never stayed there for long tho cause it was too overwhelmingly loud.

one time she went to that place and realised some construction workers occupied it. she was emotionally devastated.

constance — always saves the seat for the elderly, disabled and other people who might need it, and people always thank her plenty when she does so. actually never ever sat on a train seat unless the wagon was mostly empty. however, one time she had a horribly tiring + devastating + bad day and decided to sit down for once. got called 10 slurs by an old guy who didn’t see there was another free seat and ocean then told her she should have thought about others first. when she got home she wrote an angry vent in her musical diary (yk, the ones that open with a password and then play a one direction song or smth) with a fluffy pen.

+ talia — she is a subway rat. has a love/hate relationship with obolon station. has beef with pochayna station. she herself is from solomyanka region of kyiv where there is no subway. considers it her curse.

thank you folks for reading this, feel free to send me asks for headcanons!

[justinspoliticalcorner]

Jonathan Cohn at HuffPost:

Democratic presidential nominee Kamala Harris on Tuesday proposed a major new initiative: expanding Medicare to cover the cost of long-term care at home. Such a plan could mean the option of staying at home, rather than in a nursing facility, for the millions of seniors and people with disabilities who need help with the daily tasks of life. It could also mean physical and financial relief ― and new opportunities for school or work outside the home ― for the millions of working-age Americans who today provide so much of that care on their own without much in the way of outside assistance. If the proposed legislation is enacted, such a program would represent a substantial boost in federal support for caregiving and, by any measure, one of the largest one-time increases in American history. Harris made her announcement during an appearance on “The View,” the nation’s top-rated daytime talk show, and presented the initiative as a way to help the “sandwich generation” ― that is, the working adults who have aging parents while still caring for children. Roughly a quarter of the American population falls into that category, according to Pew Research.

“There are so many people in our country who are right in the middle ― they’re taking care of their kids and they’re taking care of their aging parents ― and it’s just almost impossible to do it all,” Harris said. “Especially if they work, we’re finding that so many are then having to leave their job, which means losing a source of income, not to mention the emotional stress.” Harris pledged to finance the home care initiative fully, in part by tapping the savings from yet another reform she has proposed: expanding the federal government’s power to negotiate drug prices directly with manufacturers. The federal government acquired that power just two years ago, thanks to Democratic legislation that Harris supported.

[...]

The Home Care Struggle Today

Dollars alone don’t capture the scope of the proposal ― or the change it could mean for individual families. Nearly 20% of seniors require some kind of help with bathing, eating and other daily life functions, according to the available research. The percentage is even higher for older seniors, plus there are non-elderly people who need these services because of disabilities. But Medicare doesn’t cover this kind of long-term care, except in limited circumstances, nor does private insurance. And few families have the income or savings to pay out of pocket for these supports and services, which over the course of a year can easily generate bills into six figures. That leaves Medicaid, currently the nation’s single largest payer of long-term services and, for millions of Americans, a true lifesaver. But Medicaid is available only to people with low incomes, which means that families cannot qualify until they have “spent down” whatever savings they have or figured out ways of transferring those savings to relatives. (An entire legal specialty exists purely to guide people through this process.)

And that’s not the only issue with Medicaid. States manage the program, even though the federal government covers most of the cost, which means eligibility, benefits, management and reimbursement for long-term care vary enormously depending on where people live. That’s especially true when it comes to home care. Many states cap enrollment, creating long waiting lists for services and forcing people into nursing homes (which Medicaid covers more uniformly) even when they would prefer to remain at home. The alternative for many families is to provide care on their own, which is nice in some cases and terrible in others and somewhere in between for the rest.

[...]

But the version Harris is putting forward now is different from the old one. The previous proposal would have essentially taken the existing Medicaid program and made it bigger. Harris envisions Medicare taking on home care for its beneficiaries, which to many analysts and advocates for the elderly seems like an improvement, in part because Medicare is not limited to those in the most dire economic circumstances. “The care that people need ― the long term-care ― is part of their overall health care needs,” Georgetown public policy professor Judith Feder, a co-author on one of the recently published papers sketching out a proposal, told HuffPost. “Nobody should have to be impoverished because they need health care or long-term care. It needs to be a true guarantee of security, not simply a last resort.”

Whether a home care program was part of Medicaid or Medicare, moving from Harris’ campaign pledge to actual policy would require answering all sorts of complicated questions and confronting all sorts of difficult trade-offs, over not just money but also issues like how to balance support for professional care workers and those who prefer to provide care on their own. There would also be questions of whether and how to restructure Medicaid’s long-term care supports, how those would integrate with the new Medicare initiative and what that would all mean for the providers of care, who, undoubtedly, would have a thing or two to say about it. But the potential complications go hand in hand with potential benefits, which include everything from additional savings to Medicare (because some studies suggest home care reduces hospital expenses) to shifting more care out of nursing homes and back to the home setting.

Democratic Presidential candidate Kamala Harris is making a major proposal to help seniors and their caregivers by expanding Medicare to include home-based care.

See Also:

Vox: Biden’s push for child care failed. What lessons are there for Kamala Harris?

[frodothefair]

Sometimes I become that middle-aged conservative mom (even though I don't have kids, so I suppose a metaphorical mom) who perennially rants about how nobody appreciates her.

I'm not a saint, after all. I crave a little recognition now and then.

An example, recently, has been my chronically online housemate who continues to struggle with her mental health. (Cut for sensitive material).

She's had yet another meltdown over something that happened on twitter (she's a trans person, so maybe that makes sense), and the only reason yet another hospitalization was averted was that her friend came over and took her to her house for the weekend.

So Mr. Nisilë, said friend, and I have been talking a lot about what we can do to help the housemate, and at one point Mr. Nisilë opined that he wishes he were easier to talk to, that we could have created a more supportive environment and engaged with her more, though coming from him, this is a ridiculous statement -- he can build rapport with anyone, which is why I was drawn to him in the first place.

So I went off on him. I ranted that we had done more than enough in letting her into our home in the first place, because she's not family; she's barely even a friend. That we pay her phone bill every month, and buy her groceries when our other house mate, who pays for the majority of her food, is unable to or is unavailable. That we're ok with her lack of hygiene, the state of the bathroom that's closest to her room, her tone-deaf singing and her random yelling. That we routinely drive her places, because she has no car and does not know how to drive, and neither gas nor time is free. That we're ok with her having hookups in her room with people she meets on apps, that we've seen her through two hospitalizations and two attempts on her life; we've hidden sharps, spoken to hospital staff, driven her to appointments and helped her find resources.

Believe you me, I know of what I speak when I say most people wouldn't do this. When I was ten or so, my mother, younger brother, and I had to flee an abusive situation. We were a respectable family in dire straits, a hardworking mother with two well-behaved children, and we had many friends and acquaintances, but everybody denied us a place to stay for completely BS reasons. The only person who didn't was my grandmother's employer. He was a man with an elderly sick mother, and my grandmother worked as their live-in housekeeper and caregiver. The three of us lived in a tiny bedroom in their home for three months -- the bedroom was meant to be my grandmother's, but she slept on the couch.

That is why I will never begrudge our housemate what I do for her. I will never see her as a burden. But to hear that I haven't done enough when I already have done more than 99.9% of the population would do was extremely upsetting. That's different from seeing her as a burden. I can deal with all of the above inconveniences, but I should still be allowed to be angry with her for not acknowledging my efforts, the fact that she f-cking won the lottery between me, Mr. Nisilë, and our other housemate.

A sarcastic voice inside might say, "well, what, do you want a medal now" for hearing people's problems all day and trying to solve them, for your financial contributions, for helping out another person in need?

Well, you know, maybe I do. I do a lot, and none of it is easy, because I have disabilities of my own. I may have some relative privilege, but also disadvantages in spades, from day one. So maybe a simple thank you would be nice -- explicit appreciation of how nice the house we keep is, the fact that we have enough resources to help out, that we don't care about a lot of things that would have been dealbreakers for other people.

But the thing is, the housemate is hardly capable of such a thing. She has too many troubles in her head to think of others, and that's part of her illness. So maybe it is not fair of me to expect that.

It's just that... They say a good deed is its own reward, but sometimes it does not feel like enough.

[secretsocietyxmen]

I think my mom is going to fuck someone up, legally at least.

So, like, there's this Clerk of Courts in North Carolina who is infamous for removing the guardianship of elderly/disabled/legally incompetent people, placing them in state run homes, selling off all their assets to pay for said homes, then leaving them to die. She did this so much that they had to introduce a law to stop it.

Anyway, my brother is legally incompetent. He lost half his brain in a car accident when we were kids, so he can't take care of himself. My mother set things up so we can get money from his estate to cover things for the house and for him. She needed to get a new car for him, so she went though the regular process for this, meeting up with the Clerk of Courts to discuss this. Only, our regular was out for a family emergency, so guess who stepped in?

Anyway, she went in, and this woman was being completely unreasonable, and was asking for things she could not have possibly prepared for. After that, she sent a letter pretty much slandering her for trying to get money for "unnecessary things" and letting her adult children stay with her.

This sucks, but my mother is a stubborn woman, and does not need the black mark on her record, so she hired a lawyer to take a peek at things. Uncovering 1) She is not allowed to work in this jurisdiction and had no right to sit in on this, 2) She works with our previous CoC, who did a bunch of shady stuff and was booted out, and 3) Second paragraph.

My mother is a scary woman when she wants to be. She's been a disability activist for as long as I can remember, and she's the entire reason my brother has his money, as she successfully sued the company who's driver hit us. She is a menace in the courtroom, and now she has just cause for taking this woman down.

Anyway, this is just a personal post, because my mom is about to become the personal hero of over 200 families affected by this bullshit, and I could not be prouder/more amazed.

[cherryqueenoftarts]

For a year and four months I worked as an in home caregiver for people with severe disabilities. There were parts of my job I liked a lot and parts that were very frustrating, but overall it was unsustainable because I had to commute for an hour to the city and then during the day I'd have to go from one home to another. I was not paid for that time. So I was earning a part time salary but I was gone from home 60+ hours a week. I was utterly exhausted.

I found a job just 3km away from home, working at a long term care facility for elderly people who are still fairly autonomous. Reader, it was a shitshow. This has been independently verified; the government agency that evaluates these places failed the facility.

Anyway, I was going to hang in there because they had promised to put me through a nursing assistant certification. At the end of my 30 trial period they fired me. Mind you they never trained me for any part of the job. When I asked questions I got answers ranging from sarcastic to nasty. And no one ever gave me any feedback. So yeah I'm sure I fcked things up but I'm also not a mind-reader and a heads up would have helped. Anyway. Because I quit the previous job and worked only thirty days I'm ineligible for unemployment aid. You have to have worked at least 91 days after quitting a job.

It's been two weeks. I have lost track of how many jobs I have applied for. I have three kids. One has a birthday in November, then there's Christmas, and then another has a birthday in January. I'm stressing so hard. I had a job interview today at a long term care facility for dependent elderly people but it's in the hour-away city and the bus schedule doesn't fit with their shifts. The managing nurse is going to see if she can make it work when she does the schedules for November and December over the weekend. I find out on Monday.

[tuttle-did-it]

As a child-free disabled person in their 40s…. Don’t have kids if your main reason is for them to take care of you when you get older.

Also also, it’s not their job. Kids don’t ask to be born. This idea that ‘I took care of you as a baby so you have to take care of me when I’m older’ mindset is absolute shit.

They owe you nothing. They can choose to help you, which is great. But they owe you nothing.

And you don’t have to take care of your parents when they are older. Especially if they are abusive.

You can choose to. Which is great. But you don’t have to stop living your life to take care of them when they chose to have you.

My mother had her sons to take care of from the time she was 16 until she got the youngest one out of the house about 18 years ago. (Long story but I wasn’t raised with her).

She was going to move home to her country once her kids got out. Then her parents fell ill almost immediately after. She put her life on hold again to take care of them.

My mother has taken care of her abusive, cruel parents for over 15 years. Her mother died during one of the Covid spikes.

She’s now stuck looking after her abusive father who has treated her like shit her whole life.

I have seen her age 30 years in the past 15 from the stress. A full time job being the carer of two very difficult, ill people, and working her full time job. She wants to move home to her own country. But she doesn’t feel she can go until he dies. So She is wasting her life— what precious few last years she had with her health still well enough she could do what she wants- retire, travel, volunteer at things she cares about.

Instead she is taking her father to doctors appointments, putting up with his abuse. She is constantly sick and worried and anxious all the time because she’s stuck in a country she hates, looking after a man who has always treated her like shit. She’s aging twice as fast, burning the precious time she has left for herself.

She’s chosen this. Because she’s of the generation ‘you take care of your elderly parents no matter what.’ And it’s killing her. Taking what I’m guessing is decades off her life.

She should t have to do this. There should be affordable, accessible help for people in this situation.

If she falls and gets hurt? Gets cancer? Hit with a debilitating condition like Parkinson’s? I cannot look after her when she gets older. I’m disabled, I can barely look after myself— and some days, I cannot even do that. Her sons will absolutely not take her in if she is poorly or ill.

She is wasting the precious few years of health she has on people who abuse her.

Will she will probably struggle alone, with no family to support her? Yeah. I hate it, but yeah. Is that going to happen to me? If I live that long, yes. I will be in a wheelchair, unable to move? Unable to take care of myself, and no one else to help me.

But should I have had kids just to improve the chances of someone being around when I am that old? Nope. That’s a horrible thing to do to your kids. Because I’ve seen the cost on her face and body as she gets more and more broken down mentally and physically from all of this.

Does she owe what precious free years of health, well-being she has left to her abusive parents? in a country she hates—no.

Do I owe it to her to move to a country I hate to look after her when she is older, at great cost of my own physical and mental health? No.

Would it be less scary, the thought of knowing you’re safe if you get older and need help? Of course. Would a kid owe me the best years of their lives to dribble smashed banana into my mouth? Nope.

If I had kids, would I expect them to destroy their lives helping me? Also no. I’d beg them not to, actually.

Sane and stable countries use taxes to help people from the cradle up the grave. It’s absurd to me that so many countries, including the one I am living in, has such tragically awful care for vulnerable people. Our taxes are as much as the sane and stable countries. But that money isn’t being used to help you, or me, or or that baby or that elderly person.

Mostly, it’s going to corrupt politicians who do whatever the fuck they want. And a royal family that has billions in their bank accounts but are still living off tax payers.

This is a very broken, ridiculous system. And I’m tired. I’m scared for me, for all the disabled people in my situation. I’m scared for all the people like my mum who might not even get her own life until she’s 80? You bet like hell I am. But that’s not the kids’ faults. That’s the governments for wasting your money starting wars in other countries, paying for private jets for politicians, and generally just being shit.

We all deserve better.

It feels taboo as a childfree person to admit this but I actually do have concerns about who is going to take care of me when I'm old. The elder care system in our nation relies A LOT on the unpaid care labor of adult children. I just don't think that's a good reason to have kids.

"But you'll have more money!" does not completely put this to rest for me. Neither does "Buy care insurance!" Even if I can afford direct personal care, who is going to advocate for me to get it? Who is going to navigate bureaucracy for me when I'm 80?

"If you do have kids, there's no GUARANTEE that they'll take care of you when your old!" That's true, but doesn't solve my problem.

I think childfree people get very defensive about this question because its used as a kind of "gotcha!" against us, but I actually do not feel we can afford to be in denial about this reality. Based on current trends of more people in their 30s stating they intend to be permanently childfree, we are going to see a huge wave of childfree adults hitting the eldercare system at once in a few decades. Childfree people in their 30s should be advocating around eldercare NOW.

[nathank77]

1/15/25

9:05 p.m

I made a "truce," with my mom on camera that I wouldn't record her anymore if she didn't go through with the false allegations of elderly abuse. Of course I'm still going to record certain things... like if she acts crazy. And any peaceful conversations we have about the house situation. Like how I buy my own toilet paper bc I fucking do. And like how I shit in a bag in the kitchen when she needs to use the bathroom.. and I don't keep her out of it... and how I'm not forcing her to get rid of Riley but I'm also not willing to take care of her and how no-one can force anyone to take care of a dog. I said if you want to keep Riley, pay someone to take her for walks when you cant be home. I cannot do it. I won't do it skye won't do it. Like liv is moving out. She's your dog and I won't have any part in the rehoming process incase you say I forced you to rehome her. You can keep her but the barricade stays. She goes in the crate when I leave and come home and when I cook. It's a compromise.

She's having someone meet Riley this weekend but I doubt they'll take her.... I feel bad but when it comes down to it my mother is mad I won't take care of Riley for her. I truly cannot. I wish I could but I mean if I wanted a dog it wouldn't be a shedding breed. It wouldn't be long hair. It would be tiny. It would be quiet when it barked. It would be like my little Nala. The barking blanket when people came over.. and then she would get out of the blanket wagging her tail..or she would stay under it and stop barking. Nala was adorable.

What is the difference between Nala and Riley. Well for one Nala bathroomed on pavement. No poison ivy could have ever touched her.... we didn't have a backyard... and when we moved here... my mother took good care of the yard... and Nala was a diva. She didn't want to go outside if it was raining or snowing. She would do it but as close to the door as possible and she would run in. She didn't care about squirrels or other people. She only cared about sun bathing in nice weather. And I mean she was chill. She didn't have a panic attack when a person came over. She didn't have to be crated. Her bark wasn't over 100 decibels loud.

Riley has fucking anxiety and she barks and whines and go crazy. She gives us all anxiety.

She chews in the crate trying to get out. She claws at it. She would probably be friendly with someone coming in.. but we don't know. Even still she's loud and it's awful and my mother doesn't take care of the yard anymore. And neither does my sister.

I feel bad bc I know my mother loves her but i can't take care of her. Ever since the truce she's been nicer... I don't expect it to last.

I mean she left a stuffed animal german shepherd on the barricade that skye got her when she having the surgery. I get it okay? I feel fucking bad. I wish I could be not ocd. I wish I could lay with Riley and rub my face all over her coat and experience absolutely no anxiety.

I wish I could walk her and give her the life she deserves. I bet if we had people over and we put her on a leash to start she would act like when she first met us. She licked my hand.. I mean she is friendly.

She won't live long here bc we don't have the money.. and it just sucks. I'd love to be able to take care of her. I mean the stuffed animals is low key killing me. I'm not a monster but I'm servery disabled by ocd. I wish it wasn't so fucking severe. I'd love for it to be different. My mental health is a trash pale. With the hallucination.

I'm really worried about sleep.. but I'm writing this so I don't think about that stuffed animals and my mother cuddling with Riley on the couch... and I know Riley makes her happy..but she also stresses her out when she freaks out.

I remember when she fell on the floor and I called 911... Riley was in the crate going wild. And mom was screaming where is my doggy. Over and over again. It's fucking sad.

Like Riley is traumatizing me. I don't expect the people to take her but I cannot take care of Riley. I really can't. It hurts bc in a perfect world i wouldn't have ocd. I'd be able to take care of Riley financially and be her best friend.. but it's so hard just taking care of me.

I know my mother is becoming demented. But the truce seemed to help.. of course I'll record what i need to bc i mean if she does it i got to prove she's crazy in order to protect myself from false allegations... but I hope the truce is enough. Although I know if the people take Riley she's going to get drunk and go crazy.

It's sad seeing her get demented... I looked at her the other day and I saw my grandma coke... not as a hallucination... but I remember her when she had dementia... she threw her shit around. She was mean and nasty. I mean it was ugly. And I can see my mother going down that path.

Hopefully me recording her just made her crazy and she won't be so crazy... but I mean obv she was treating me like shit before the recording which is why I started recording to begin with. And I mean she had many crazy moments.

I'm sad about that and worried about my hearing. And I mean my hand. And sleep. And talking about Nala makes me sad and happy but mostly sad. I think about that video of her coming out from under the blanket. And I want to remember her like that singing with me.

I don't ever want to have another dog. I love Nala so much. I can't lose another dog. I mean Nala stole my fucking heart. I can't love another dog like that. I don't even want to love a person deeply bc everyone dies. I can't love another dog even if there was no poison ivy and she didn't shed. I can't lose another dog. The barking blanket hurts so much but also makes me so happy.

Sometimes I wonder if you ever get over losing a dog. And I don't think you ever do. Maybe with a lot of time but I mean even still. I don't think I'll ever be able to think of Nala without having tears come to my eyes.

[wheelin-after-midnight]

13.

Does bad grammar bother you?

As long as I can make out what that person is trying to say, it doesn't bother me in the least. Unless someone is asking me to check their grammar or read over something for them, I won't even mention it. I think it's really rude to insult people over grammatical errors or their command of a particular language. Especially if it's not within a context where things like that are genuinely important. Even then, you don't have to be a dick about it. Some people are disabled and use assistive devices to write or communicate, some people are elderly, some have serious injuries, not everyone has the same mother tongue, some people are multilingual and use multiple languages all the time and make mistakes. You just have no idea. There are much bigger problems in this world to focus on. As long as that person is trying, it's usually not that big of a deal.

Do you save your shoe boxes or any other box?

I don't save shoe boxes, but if I buy something new that was packaged in a box I will keep it for a while in case I have to return the thing or make use of a warranty. I also put a lot of things I wanted to keep away from Nippy in boxes I kept away in the pantry cupboard when she was smaller.

What's the craziest rumor you've ever heard about yourself?

It wasn't crazy, but "she's bi" (I'm not, I'm gay as hell...but I identified as such for a while when I was trying to figure stuff out) got spread around before I was actually out. PSA: this sucks. Don't do this shit. No matter how harmless you think you're being, you don't have any idea the kind of personal or home situations that person is dealing with or coming from. You are potentially making it very hard and very unsafe for someone else. All that aside, it's not another person's business to out anyone. It's that person's journey and they have every right to go at the pace they want, if they want, telling or not telling whomever. The end.

How many sweatshirts would you guess that you own?

Maybe like, 12.

Are you a fan of Taylor Swift?

I'm not. She's my best friend's absolute favourite though, so I'm familiar with quite a bit of her music and I don't mind a few songs. I'm just the supportive sidekick along for the ride when it comes to my friends' passions. I'll learn the songs, sing and bop along, listen to you talk about the discography, hype it up and ask questions even if it's not my favorite, because that's what good friendship and genuine support should be about. I love seeing the light in someone's eyes when they get excited about things they love that make them really happy and bring them joy. I know what it feels like to have that snuffed out just because someone hates you, is very self important, genuinely nasty or just for no good reason at all. If you love and care about someone it's not just about you and what you like or how that relationship can be of benefit to you. It's what you can give, too. I also just like learning things or being exposed to things I'm not usually or wouldn't choose for myself. It's not gonna kill me to go on a road trip and belt out some Taylor Swift.

What's the coolest name you've ever heard someone have?

There's a few. My friend's sister named her son Asher and I loved that name. It's not one you hear often around here.

What's your least favorite genre of music and why?

I don't really have a least favourite. I'm a pretty musical person and I love almost all music, generally. I just have genres I don't listen to near as much as others or ones I fall off listening to or whatever for a while. I don't listen to a ton of heavy metal.

If you wear make up, what's some good brands you'd recommend someone with very pale skin?

I'm not the person to ask for brand recommendations. I almost never wear makeup.

Do you usually complain a lot when you first wake up?

If Nippy sneaks under my blanket and bites my toes and feet, yes, lmao.

What did you last complain about?

That I had to pee really bad. This frickin punk cat was like "hello mama. Dis the purrrfect time to sit RIGHT in front of your wheelchair so you can't MOVE." I was legit arguing with her for like, ten minutes. It was a full on conversation. She was back talking me and everything. (she's an extremely vocal cat) Every time I tried to get her to move she'd move about half an inch away from my wheel and then look at me like, "that good?!" I finally broke out her full name and she moved for real, but omg. I thought I was gonna pee my pants. 😂🤦🏻‍♀️

What's something you're thankful for?

My girlfriend. My cat. Music. I would say this apartment, but I'm not gonna have it for too much longer. :(

What era had the best music/movies?

Oooh man. I honestly love music and movies from the 40s and 50s to today, so this is hard. I'm gonna go with 80s, though. So much of 80s music was bangin' and I can think of quite a few movies I loved from then off the top of my head.

Did you ever like nursery rhymes as a child? What was your favorite?

I didn't hate them, but I don't recall having a favourite.

What do you usually purchase at gas stations? (aside from gas of course)

I'm never really even at gas stations, but occasionally I'll get coffee or snacks or someone might bring those here. I did get gas station pizza once when I was having a golden girls marathon and wine night and it actually wasn't bad pizza at all. I wouldn't typically choose to get that from a gas station, though.

Do you drink regular or diet soda?

I used to drink diet soda all the time. I don't know how I drank so much of it because if I even taste it now I usually think it's vile. I don't drink soda anywhere near as much now, so I'll drink regular when I want some.

What's one of your favorite artists/bands, and least favorite song from them?

I love so many artists and bands. I could go on for pages and pages about this, but Whitney Houston is my favourite vocalist of all time. Let me preface the second part of this question by saying that least favorite song by Whitney does not - by any metric - mean bad song. That woman could sang any damn thing, any day of the week, backwards, forwards, upside down and sideways. I don't think there are any songs of hers that I genuinely hate, but I do skip Greatest Love of All quite often. I know it's a lot of people's favourite, it was one of her favourites of her own catalogue, if I'm not mistaken. I just don't particularly play it that often. I have to be in a certain mood, idk.

Have you ever seen them live?

No. I was an adult when she passed away but I never had the chance to. I'll forever be salty about it. I did see the theatre showing of the remastered Durban, South Africa concert though, which was great. So that's something.

Do you go on walks regularly?

I physically can't walk, but if someone asked me to accompany them on a walk, I would, depending who it was.

Do very sociable people aggravate you or more shy people?

Sociable people don't aggravate me at all. I love when people actually engage me in conversation and look me in the eyes when talking to me and don't use disability as an excuse to treat me like a leper or talk to me disrespectfully or like I'm stupid or mentally disabled also. I'm pretty shy and reserved and quiet, so if I'm around people like that it might take a bit for me to warm up. I try to make other people feel comfortable though, if I see that they're like me and struggling or sitting alone.

Are you registered to vote?

I absolutely am.

Do you consider graffiti to be true art or just messy?

It's absolutely art. Art is open to interpretation. I'll die on this hill.

Describe something odd that you own.

Nippy! Hahahahaha. She's a very smart cat, I love her with my whole heart, but my god she's weird. She often acts more dog than cat like. The things she does just make me laugh so much every single day. I was originally supposed to take a different cat, but that didn't pan out. I questioned my decision at first and wondered if I was a good enough pet parent or if I could handle it because she's so high energy and absolutely fucking nuts almost all the time even now at almost a year and a half old. But I would absolutely die if anything happened to her at this point. She's saved me from so much grief and loss and I'm so glad I stuck things out and established a bond and routine together. I definitely made the right choice and I'm really glad I picked one with so much personality.

What last overwhelmed you?

Thinking about how much time I have left until I have to move. It makes me feel so anxious and so sick. All the time. I'm really worried about how it's all gonna turn out and if it doesn't go well, I'm stuck there. Makes me wanna die. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place with no other options and I hate it.

Do you wear a lot of pink?

Some, at times. I wouldn't say a lot.

Do you currently have a fan on?

No.

Do you take a lot of pictures?

I take a fuck ton of pictures of my cat. My devices keep telling me I need to delete stuff or add more storage. I'm not deleting anything. I want to keep every memory of her. I know she's not gonna be with me forever and I'll probably outlive her and that thought just breaks me and makes it impossible to get rid of anything.

Do you like the name Aidan?

I do.

What is the first thing you said when you woke up this morning?

"Listen here, you fluffy little freak! My toes are not food! Do I grab your paws and take your claws in my teeth to wake you up? No. So let's not. Thank you!"

What's your McDonald's order?

I don't have a usual order. Last time I got something from there it was a double quarter pounder with cheese combo and a drink.

When did you last have a donut?

I'm not sure, tbh.

What's the longest word you know that you can accurately spell?

Antidisestablishmentarianism.<<< yoooo same! This is always my answer for questions like this.

Do you live in a city with more than 100,000 people?

Lmfao, no. I live in a place that's barely even a town and has a population under 400.

Does your name begin with B, L, M, T, or H?

No.

What do you do when you can't fall asleep?

Put the tv on, listen to music in my headphones, play a game on my tablet, talk to my girlfriend as she's usually always up late.

What did you last watch on TV?

I rented It Ends With Us on Prime and thank god it was on sale for very cheap and not full rental price, because I hated it. I thought it was terrible. I still can't really fully articulate why. Just really rubbed me the wrong way.

Do you know anyone who keeps a Christmas tree up year round?

I did this til like, May, once. A long time ago. But no I don't know anyone and I wouldn't do this now.

Who were you last in a vehicle with?

My mum and mum's husband.

What's the strangest video you've ever seen?

The stuff my brother sends me! Some of it is funny and makes me laugh, a lot of it I'm like... How do you even find this shit? Lmfao.

What country are you from and which country would you not mind residing in?

I'm Canadian. It wouldn't be feasible for me to live anywhere else for a lot of reasons even if I wanted to, but I've always wanted to visit South Africa. It's at the top of the list of places I'd choose to go first, if I could travel more.

What's something you care strongly for?

I love my cat more than anything. She's my child. I deeply care for my friends, how I can be the best version of a friend to each of them. I love my girlfriend with my whole heart and fall more in love with her all the time. I care about her needs and her feelings and how I can be the best, most supportive partner. I care about music and theatre and art, things that allow others to express themselves, make the world better, and bring people joy. I often have to remind myself that there is still good in the world through all the mess and darkness we're so inundated with. It's so much bigger than just my corner of it.

What goes best with dessert, coffee or milk?

I only drink white milk if I add protein powder and make like a meal replacement shake. It's often the only thing I can keep down during migraine episodes when I can't eat. Coffee is definitely my choice to go with dessert or sweet things.

If Kirby absorbed you, what power would they get?

Hmmm.

Who has better coffee, Dunkin or Starbucks or maybe somewhere else?

I've never had Dunkin. I love Starbucks, but it's expensive and I don't go there often. I love McDonald's coffee.

What's your go-to appetizer?

I love fruit trays with cream cheese dip, mini pieces of naan with siesta dip, chips with sour cream with shredded cheese on top, spinach dip, Buffalo chicken potato skins, loaded nachos.

Have you ever received a present that made you cry?

Oh, absolutely. I definitely cried when babe and I gave each other the rings our mum/Nan gave us that we wore all the time the first time we were together. There are others from other people, but that one sticks out and probably will always.

Would you rather read a history novel or fiction?

I would read whatever really, if subject matter held my interest.

What's something you are addicted to?

Mint Oreos. Hoooly fuck I love those things. Now I think all the other Oreos suck. I don't eat them often though because the store closest to me often doesn't stock them.

Do you know what time you were born?

No.

Don't you hate when you jerk yourself awake while falling asleep?

Ugh yes! The worst.

Nobody is perfect. Who do you think is close to perfect though?

She will say that she's not - and technically she isn't, I guess, cause no one is. We've had our problems and even broken up before, but I think my girlfriend is the closet thing to perfect that I could or will experience. Sometimes I'm just lying in my bed staring at the ceiling and she'll randomly call or message me, or something will just remind me of her or one of our conversations or something, and I'm just like, goddamn, that's my baby. What the fuck? What do you mean we found our way back to each other and she apologized and took accountability and proves herself to me every day and doesn't want to be without me? She survived her medical scare and didn't die and came back to me? I get to tell her I love her every night before we fall asleep and every day when we wake up and didn't have to say goodbye? Permanently? It's possible to be loved correctly after so much trauma? Is this real life? What? What is happening? Ahh.

Okay, my bad. I'll shut up now. Lmfao.

Do you know of any haunted buildings in your town?

No.

Do you think too much about your past or future?

Yes and yes. Send help. Lmfao. :/

Is anyone on your bad side lately?

A little bit.

What's the most random song on your playlist that people wouldn't expect?

I have a fair bit of Maria Callas, actually. Not a lot of people listen to her that I know.

Do you wish Bzoink would let you put music on your profile?

RIP Bzoink. You were the OG.

When did you last receive a business card from somebody?

I'm not sure.

What makes you want to take a survey?

Idk I just take them when I want to and have some time. I skim them to see if it seems like one I've taken already.

What song did you last hum or sing along to?

Seriously singing it was Grapevyne by Brownstone. Fucking around singing it was Wobble by V. I. C.

What TV streaming service do you use the most?

Netflix or Disney Plus, probably.

Would you try that flaming hot mountain dew? isn't that so wild?

That sounds nasty. I don't like mountain dew to begin with.

What's something strange that you enjoyed when you tried it?

Putting mayonnaise on hot dogs.

Do you own any adult coloring books?

Yes.

What did you last draw or write down?

I don't remember.

Do you always smile in pictures or what is your go-to pose for pictures?

I don't have a go to pose, but I don't always smile.

What's a topic you love discussing with others? share something with me about it (:

Idk I just love talking with people who don't shit on my passions or interests and engage me about them because I don't experience that much. I love jamming with other people who can sing or people who can play instruments, I love talking about music with people who really love music. I love talking to my friends about any adventures we've had or trying to plan other ones. I love talking about all the funny things my cat does and showing all the tricks I've taught her. I love deep talks with empathetic, gentle, understanding people. I love hearing other people's stories and when they trust me with things that they've been through or are really important to them. It means a lot to me.

Would you say that you're an outdoorsy type person?

I love summer, but otherwise I'm not super outdoorsy, no.

In your opinion, appearance aside, what makes someone beautiful and ugly?

Their values, their passions, how they listen, how they treat and interact with others, especially those who are more vulnerable or less fortunate than they are.

What's the craziest hairstyle you've ever had or would have?

I've shaved the side of my head once, then completely shaved my head twice.

Do you use matches or lighters more?

Neither.

Have you ever played pinball on a machine or just online?

Neither.

Do you have any chores you need to get done?

I need to do laundry soon, but I don't have enough to make a load worth it quite yet.

If you had to get a tattoo, what would it be of and where would you like it?

I plan to get one in memory of my Nan as soon as possible. Something she painted, with Nan underneath it, her birth and death dates, then "the secrets in your heart she's always known" it's from the song Mother, by Sugarland. It makes me think of her more than it does my own mum. She was more emotionally supportive than my mum is and knew me better than everyone and anyone. She was my rock and I'll miss her with my whole heart forever. She never put herself in the middle of things with me and my mum, though she often offered to. She knew all my deepest darkest shit I couldn't even tell my mum or anyone. Swore she'd take it to her grave and never say a word. And she did. That's the rarest thing in the frigging world. I'm so lucky to have had her. But I never would have been ready not to. It never would have been long enough. The grief still just hangs out in the pit of my stomach all the time. It's horrible. I miss her so much.

Have you ever had a bad sunburn?

Many times.

Have you ever seen a play? What was it about?

I've seen several. I go any chance I can. I used to be super into acting in middle and high school and I love musicals and live theatre.

Would you enjoy being famous or does it seem too stressful?

Oh, Jesus, no. It would absolutely ruin me. It's ruined too many long before their time. The money might be nice, but I don't think the sacrifice is worth it. The things paparazzi and crazed, overzealous fans put celebrities through is disgusting. Leave. Them. Alone. Just because they sign up to use a talent to make money and/or entertain does not mean we own them or we are owed every bit of their time or behind the curtain of their every day lives. Everybody deserves to have their boundaries respected. Everybody.

[forgeofideas]

I am a child who was raised into the faith. My mother has believed in the god of Abraham for several generations. By this, He is the god of my ancestors. My Father is the first convert in his family, he left behind his former faith at brutal crossing of the Mekong River. From the time I could read my father inundated my with biblical teachings. Each morning we would establish a firm foundation of the Christian faith in my life. The issue, however, was that although I grew in head knowledge I was lacking in love. I knew how to read the bible with my head, and not with my heart. There had always been apart of me that knew to treat others with kindness, but it would take me much longer to fathom the depths of what it meant to love one another. Upon growing older I learned to live my words of prayer, something always easier said than done. Even now I still find myself lavishing the Lord with my words, but failing to find Him with my actions. I have realized that the true mark of obedience to God is done by action, not that salvation is achieved by works. My mind was always filled with dogma, ideology and a yearn for knowledge. There is the practical and the ideological. What you think and what you do. In my years as a young adult I have tried to draw this out more and more. I have tried to live more rather than think more. I pray for his guidance everyday. Deprived social skills and lack of confidence are consequences of this. 

When I began to enter the workforce as a nursing assistant, there was a lack of care for training me. I had a very difficult time trying to get a hold of the work environment. For the longest time I was the youngest nursing assistant my facility had. My job required me to care for the elderly, so I stuck out like a sore thumb to both patients and adult co-workers. I eventually did get along with all of them, but the first year was a brutal process of integration. I didn’t work in high school either, so I was thrown into this environment during my freshman year of college with no experience. My tasks included bathing residents, feeding, dressing, physically transferring and cleaning them. Each nursing assistant was given the task of caring for nine to fifteen residents. Many of those I worked with had dementia and physical disabilities. In worse cases there were a few incidents where my patients had even gotten combative with me. Age does strange things to the mind. Keeping track of nine to fifteen patients is difficult enough when all of a sudden one dementia resident deicides to act out. I recall walking in retail places and seeing where all the other young people were. Places like Target, Walmart etc, and seeing them with such lax jobs filled me with envy. I had to deal with stress all day while other people my age would work simpler jobs. 

I did relish my time working with the elderly however. Many of them were from the WW2 era, lots of great stories. Even though some residents weren’t the best story tellers, I enjoyed hearing their experiences. It was life changing seeing human beings at the twilight of their existence. At the same time I was also babysitting my little cousins. They had to be around the ages of 2-3 at the time. Its ironic, really, babysitting toddlers and then going out to care for the elderly. When a child is dropped off at daycare they will cry and shout for their mother. “Where is mommy?” they will say? “When will she come to pick me up?” The child thinks the parent will be gone only for a few minutes after some convincing, but will eventually break out upon realizing they won’t be back for a few hours. Only decades later, a senile man or woman will be looking down the hallway of a nursing home and holler: “When is my son or daughter going to take me back home?” Not realizing that they’ve been placed there until death. 

 An old man stumbles out of his room in the middle of the night looking for his wife in an irate manner yelling: “Where is she!? Where’d that bitch go!?” I look at him and say: “She’s dead and has been dead for weeks now.” He breaks down into tears, only to repeat the same routine night after night. The nurses leave a note for him to try and remember... I’m not sure if he ever did. 

Parents will watch their children learn to grow and walk. 

Children learn in many ways, not just by word of mouth. So although it was never taught to me deliberately, I was raised with great resentment against people who were not of my faith. The Mormon, Catholic and Muslim were all enemies in my eyes. 

[bookishbrigitta]

In case you had paywall issues or found the ads on the site made your computer crash, here's the article:

By Judy Stone

Telehealth will end on December 31 unless Congress takes urgent action to pass the Telehealth Moderniztion Act of 2024.

Before COVID, Medicare provided limited coverage for telehealth and mainly limited it to rural patients. It required them to go to a local hospital or clinic to interact with a specialist until early 2020. At the beginning of the COVID-19 pandemic, Medicare greatly expanded coverage to include patients anywhere, allowing them to access specialty care from home. Expanded services also included physical and occupational therapy, emergency department visits, and nursing facility care via telehealth. This expansion provided care to Medicare’s 64 million enrollees and broadened pre-existing access for 76 million low-income Americans on Medicaid.

It’s not just patients on Medicare/Medicaid who need to worry if this bill isn’t renewed. Private insurers often follow Medicare’s lead regarding what services they will cover.

Congress.gov summarizes the H.R. 7623 Telehealth Modernization Act of 2024 as follows: “This bill modifies requirements relating to coverage of telehealth services under Medicare.

Specifically, the bill permanently extends certain flexibilities that were initially authorized during the public health emergency relating to COVID-19. Among other things, the bill allows (1) rural health clinics and federally qualified health centers to serve as the distant site (i.e., the location of the health care practitioner); (2) the home of a beneficiary to serve as the originating site (i.e., the location of the beneficiary) for all services (rather than for only certain services); and (3) all types of practitioners to furnish telehealth services, as determined by the Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services.”

Why Does Telehealth Matter?

Being able to access medical remotely has been a huge boon to many, particularly in rural areas or those who are disabled.

Jessica Offir, PhD, is a disabled health care advocate and social psychologist for whom telemedicine is a priority issue. She observed that a stumbling block to the renewal of the bill is that “insurance companies didn't want to pay the same amounts as they were for in-person care, but providers have been insisting on it.” She added, “Trump is also wanting to reduce Medicare & Medicaid payouts, and this is one way to make that happen, as telehealth greatly increased the healthcare access of the elderly and disabled. Take away access, and payments decrease. The only entities who benefit are insurers.”

My own family are ardent supporters of access to telemedicine. We live in western Maryland, a three-hour drive to the university hospitals in Washington/Baltimore. I’m unable to drive that far, so increasingly rely on remote services, particularly for specialties that are poorly represented in our town. If telemedicine services are cut, I will be unable to access some specialties I need. Someone drives me twice a year for in-person examinations. These increasingly feel hazardous to my health for two reasons—one is the worsening traffic and trucking on the interstate. The other is that while my family still recognizes that the COVID-19 pandemic has not ended, our providers have not. They have stopped masking and even turned off HEPA filters in exam areas and waiting rooms, leaving them abandoned and useless. I take an Aranet CO2 monitor with me everywhere and try to educate people. On one recent visit, the CO2 level went from 600 ppm when I entered the exam room, to 1704 ppm before I left! That’s a level that can make you sleepy and show poorer judgment. I explained to the physician that each breath that he took had 3.4% rebreathed air from someone else, per SN Rudnick and Don Milton’s study, popularized by David Elfstrom’s reference table. That caught his attention and recognition of his potential risk of a Covid or other respiratory tract infection.

My experience is not unique. A recent article found that more than 17 percent of older Medicare beneficiaries similarly report difficulty traveling to doctor’s offices. Those over 65 averaged about 17 contact days that year for ambulatory care. That rose to 30 contact days per year for the 14 percent of patients with ten or more chronic illnesses—a considerable time and energy burden.

Another study of cancer patients found (73.8%) rated their first telemedicine visit as good as or better than an in-person visit, and 4606 (18.9%) rated it superior. In another striking example, those who received care through telehealth with peer assistance were almost seven times more likely to be treated for hepatitis C and four times more likely to achieve viral clearance after six months.

One bit of good news is that on November 15, the U.S. Drug Enforcement Administration (DEA) and the Department of Health and Human Services (HHS) announced they will extend telemedicine flexibilities through 2025. This is an important win for access to medication in end-of-life care. More than 40,000 comments were submitted to the DEA.

Paying for telehealth is a major concern now, although there has been bipartisan support for the bill. A House Republican staffer explained that “Medicare beneficiaries are on a cliff, losing tele services after December 31 2024.” Congress is negotiating how long another extension could look like and where the funding will come from, with the two parties not yet in agreement.

There have been higher per-person costs where more telehealth is used. On the other hand, telemedicine might improve patient compliance with medications and reduce costly emergency room visits.

One can argue about relative costs, but the bottom line is that there are people behind these numbers—largely disabled, elderly and rural. There are some concerns about ensuring quality of care, but that appears to be minor.

The Action Network is encouraging people to write their Congressional representatives to urge them to pass this Telehealth Modernization Act before the end of the year. It’s the only chance of saving it. With the news of planned slashes to government spending, there is no time to waste.

As Offir reminds us, “Once again, the people who will be most harmed are the vulnerable populations that can least afford to be.”

You can contact your House representatives here, and Senators here.

Please contact your Congresspeople about this one. It's vital.

You can send an email via ResistBot here:

[scentedchildnacho]

She told me I could put my cart over by that pole so I said no I'm leaving that little old lady over there that is the only person with a non stealable cart is killing you of her religious cult....you were told that elderly lady forcibly is a cult mother to you and you have to support her at starbucks all the time....the male felon releases will get man hunted so your told it's your brother and you have to die supporting it felonny religious cults steal all you have from you to support the felony poor....that's their starbucks community and as soon as that old lady refused to go to a rest home he prosecuted you for refusing to support her if you even have enough to buy a coffee there you didnt support that old lady.....that old lady has a satanist knit....she is a satanist

Only that old lady can go there and your an evil adult that won't support her good enough

Kids the old youth are all vulnerable you are an evil adult and you did everything ever and that's why

That old lady will keep rape ing and battering disabilities with forced job programs for her social check till she finally doesn't have California and when she tries to consume Starbucks regularly say in Arizona they will puke her till she stays in a rest home and stops bothering high level activity

Their satanists and don't believe indigenous people are God....and they will keep doing obsessive things in places like deserts of Arizona and when they try to parasite from a religious cult that forces women battered for children males old etc.....they finally have drought and can't cope with the hepatitus Starbucks is known for

There isn't drought here so that old lady can manage like it's okay to parasite on the fellonny religious cult.....that's the males also they will be obsessively selfish batterers till not allowed California laziness and when it's new Mexico state troopers train for everything there and will truly man hunt him for being the type of Nazi that expected us all put down for his tips

That young man truly does believe he is a GQ superior and he can accomplish it all alone and the world is better with our species gone

That man this morning had several cards on him and will still have used your daily twenty to pick up his latte their very creepy evil people who jackass they truly don't care about insult and shame on themselves

Hells angels their gonna be like yea we is white here and you can be a roadie and get into chasing them down.....governments to white crime have no shame conscience or decency at all it's a white and it caused slavery instead of being a slave

If you ask me whites learned it from Africans they learned Confederate crime from Africans

Starbucks staff is injured Jews and they kept calling them invasives to exterminate they deliberately spread disease that car pile up would not stop trying to exterminate them....

They wouldn't stop calling them foreign Poirot vaccines so they learn in asylums to spread biological weapons

There is nothing she hates more then the fish and if the fish is around your the immigrant he is

[skylersolomonofficial]

Wave Crasher

Secret identity: Joshua Smith

He has the Gift to control water, breathe underwater, and can turn into a watery mist to travel quickly. His Gift leaves him smelling like the ocean all of the time

His father, Mikey, founded The Hero Crew twenty years ago, shortly after Joshua was born. Mikey moved bases after thirteen years to live in Washington for his wife's new job, but still had an established base in California

When Joshua was thirteen, his parents died in a staged accident from one of Mikey's enemies. He then took over The Hero Crew with Doctor Shoelace at side as his second in command. She is much like an aunt to him as she was close to both of his parents

Joshua has a very stereotypical "Surfer Dudetm" personality. He says dude and like a lot. When he was younger, Joshua wanted to be a painter. He still enjoys painting, but he understands that being a hero comes first. He became a hero because he looked up to Mikey, becoming one at ten

Joshua has blond hair with blue tips, blue eyes, and tan skin with freckles all over. He is 6'3 and generally wears tank tops with stripes, faded blue shorts, and sandals any time of the year

He is twenty years old, born on June 21st, 2000. He is not one of the younger people in The Hero Crew, but was when he first joined. His father taught him for the first two months of his hero career, but Doctor Shoelace took over his training after Mikey died

Fears: failing everyone, dying, and being alone

Likes: painting, music, blue, purple, and seafood

Allergies: Pineapple and cotton

Joshua is a cisgender and heterosexual man, but he did experiment with his gender and his sexuality. Occasionally, Joshua likes to wear dresses and often paints his nails. He's very supportive of the queer, black, POC, disabled (physically and mentally) and homeless communities. He'll offer a safe space for anyone if they need it and proudly claims people as family when they're rejected by their own families

He has an adoptive sister named Tivona Blum, who happens to be Mother Nature, the third in command in The Hero Crew. He adores her very much and would do almost anything to save her

Joshua has killed people by accident for and hates the feeling that it made, hates that it felt freeing. He killed the person who killed his parents in a rage and has regretted it since. He doesn't regret that the villain is gone and can't hurt anyone ever again, but he does regret killing. He believes there was a better way to handle it and he never wants to kill ever again, knowing that if he did, he might not stop and he doesn't want to go down that road. Joshua doesn't shame anti-heroes that kill bad people, but does wish they had found a better way to do so

Like many heroes, Joshua has to deal with the pain of not being able to save everyone. But he tries. He tries to help the homeless by opening homeless shelters in The Hero Crew's name that offers a safe place for anyone who needs it with warm food and clean clothes that helps people find jobs and permanent homes. He visits the elderly and helps cheer them up. He talks to teens about safe sex and how to raise children if they have some or where to find abortions. He fights for rights for everyone and tries to help get free health care for all Americans

While being a hero doesn't pay much, Joshua gets the money he needs from donations and other members who make a large sum of money. He doesn't ask for it, but he doesn't turn it away when someone offers it