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ma1dmer · 3 months ago

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Warhammer - Tyrith Shiva Kyrus NSFW

no this isn't lore accurate, no i don't care, fight with my left tit, i have paid my dues to the warhammer fandom, this is my turn to have fun, anyways all hot girlies write warhammer smut and ignore canon....

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex): before she shuts the doors to her quarters, she'll always tell a serf at around what time they should bring in food and water for you, it's always embarrassing because you get to hear for how long exactly she plans to ravage you for, she always gets you both to finish multiple times five minutes before the serfs come in. she is very precise with her time, she doesn't even need a clock to keep track of that.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s): as a custodian she is extremely proud of her body, crafted by the emperor's own flesh and blood. as such, a bit of body worship goes a long way for her, trail your lips gently down from her neck to the middle of her breasts to her abs and then down to her legs until you are kneeling in front of her with your forehead pressed to her feet, it's the fastest way to get her to fold you in half, it might be a bit heretical, but nobody would dare ask or question her as to what exactly happens behind closed doors.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically): she likes the mess, she doesn't care about getting it on herself, but she isn't shy about getting it everywhere else, letting any serfs, coming in to clean after you two are done, see your spent all over her sheets/floor, she might chastise you for making more work for the poor serfs but she is a bit too smug about it to truly make you feel bad.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs): she loves the size difference, she loves having her strap/toys match her size, of course she doesn't push you to take her right away and trust you WILL be taking her. this is why it's so convenient to have only one partner for a long time, so she can slowly mold you to her needs wreck you for anyone else, she starts off with her fingers and mouth and simply grinding herself against you, her cunt against yours/using your cock ,then bit by bit she starts bringing in bigger and bigger toys crafted for you specifically, until she finally brings the one that is proportionate to the rest of her body.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?): a few flings here and there throughout the millennia, but they never lasted long and they were always more of a sort of exploration, a learning opportunity rather than just fumbling to satisfy her baser urges.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying): she likes to keep you pressed down or against her, she takes full advantage of her strength and size to keep you pinned or held up, she doesn't like when you move around too much, it distracts her from her goal of getting you to cum as many times as possible before you pass out. she also loves mirrors, loves watching both of your reflections as she takes you apart.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.): just like with everything else she takes her duty very seriously, even something like this, she doesn't want you to feel intimidated by her, not when you let yourself be so vulnerable and place your trust on her like that, but she just can't help it, the way she stares at you, practically devouring you with her eyes makes you feel as if she might actually do it, it's extremely intimidating.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.): it's fine and fair and soft, she doesn't do anything to it. she ,like most of the emperor's creations, always carries a sort of artificial scent mixed in with her natural musk, unlike space marines, custodes represent the emperor directly so she doesn't neglect her hygiene. she always makes sure to come to you already washed up, especially after a battle.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect): romance isn't exactly in her code, but she is very passionate, she can make you feel as if you are the only person in the world just by the way she treats you, she'll open doors for you, she'll guide you by the small of your back, she'll gently unwrap you like a gift, she'll focus her entire attention on you rather than simply chase her own pleasure through your body. she is also very touchy, she holds you close, always pulling your hands or legs to wrap around her in some way.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon): she doesn't really feel the need for it, she doesn't get the point of it, it doesn't satisfy her, not like taking you does and she'll scoff at the idea of you giving her a show, she brings you to her bedroom to touch you, if she wanted to just watch something she'd watch a holodrama.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks): body worship, slight exhibitionism etc

L = Location (favorite places to do the do): preferably back in the imperial palace, in her personal quarters, where she can keep an eye out in case she is called for duty, her bedroom isn't the most luxurious place, she doesn't get to use it often enough to warrant having anything other than the bare necessities ,but the bed is big and comfortable enough and the serfs know to mind their business when she brings you around.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going): she definitely has a thing for you submitting to her, she gives orders and she expects you to follow them, be in her room in 30 minutes, wait for her on the bed ,leave your clothes on, wear that perfume/outfit etc etc, she is very satisfied when you fully follow her instructions, it makes her want to reward you for being so obedient. she is a woman used to always having her orders followed and that doesn't change in the bedroom.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs): she is a very stubborn woman, it is very often you get told no, it doesn't even have to be something specific, sometimes it might just be your tone that makes her shut you down.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.): she can spend hours between your legs coaxing orgasm after orgasm from you simply with her mouth, her tongue buried inside of you/taking you into her mouth ,she has amazing breath control and isn't shy about flipping you on your stomach to explore other parts of your body equally as thoroughly. she gets almost annoyed if you try to pull her away, she doesn't even need the favour returned simply lie back and let her do her thing.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.): she is like a machine, she doesn't falter , doesn't change her pace its almost overwhelming, she loves overstimulating you, you'll be gasping shaking beneath her and she'll tell you to just keep taking her, give her another one,she knows your body, she knows how much you can handle and she knows you haven't reached your limit just yet.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.): they just aren't practical, she doesn't like them, simply getting in and out of her armor and bodyglove is a whole process, she would much rather make a day of it rather than rush it like a fumbling teen, she wants to take you out for a walk, listen about your day and then take you to her bed, you can usually tell what she has planned from the fact she has forgone armouring up and told the serfs around what time they can come clean up the next day.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.): not really, again following up with what we said above she is very stubborn and knows what she is into, hearing no from her is more common than hearing her say yes, she does want you to come with your own ideas if anything just to learn more about you and she is willing to indulge the safer requests of the bunch, but she isn't sharing you, she isn't taking you outside her bedchamber, she isn't doing any weird roleplay for you etc etc

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?): she is not human, she does not tire like you do ,she is always aware of how much quicker you get tired than her and tends to push for you to keep going, never past what she knows are your true limits.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?): huge space strap, i think i hauev covid

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease): she is very blunt and straight forward, she doesn't like playing games like that, but she loves to hear you beg her for mercy, it gives her the same satisfaction as besting a foe in battle.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.): she grunts and groans and sounds almost angry whenever she cums.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character): she loves having her hair pulled, i feel like she usually simply shaves it for convenience, she only tends to grow it out a bit, like we saw in the episode, if she is seeing someone, just to give them something to grab onto. she also loves when you try leaving marks on her, they never last long enough to enjoy the sight of them on her body, but that's part of why she enjoys them, drag your nails down her shoulders or down her back or on her forearms and watch her stare at her reflection in the mirror as they heal up.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?): all such feelings are kept firmly under wrap, her duty comes first before everything else, that doesn't mean she doesn't let herself indulge every so often, she is fond of the way her mind drifts off to thoughts of you when she wanders the halls of the imperial palace or in between missions, you are a welcome distraction, another reminder as to what she has pledged her life to protect.

she knows its not feasible but in these cases she often thinks about how she wishes she could keep you in her quarters, waiting for her in the imperial palace, she knows you have your own life, your own duties and such. in another life she would perhaps love to be a provider for you, you her pretty little partner simply waiting for her to come back.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards): she is a light sleeper and can fall asleep at will, especially considering the fact she probably doesn't need a lot of it like normal humans do. at the start of your relationship she waits for you to fall asleep before she let's herself drift off, but as the two of you draw closer she learns to let go a bit, she starts pretending more and more that she doesn't feel you move around when you wake up, just to get an extra few minutes of just having you in her arms.

#tyrith shiva kyrus #tyrith #tyrith smut #tyrith x reader #tyrith shiva kyrus smut #tyrith shiva kyrus x reader #warhammer x reader #warhammer 40k smut #warhammer smut #warhammer 40k #adeptus custodes #adeptus custodes smut #adeptus custodes x reader #custode x reader #custodian smut #.writing #the tithes #Warhammer the tithes

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twistedtummies2 · 9 months ago

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Gathering of the Greatest Gumshoes - Number 12

Welcome to A Gathering of the Greatest Gumshoes! During this month-long event, I’ll be counting my Top 31 Favorite Fictional Detectives, from movies, television, literature, video games, and more!

SLEUTH-OF-THE-DAY’S QUOTE: “There’s an old saying: ‘Don’t change anything. Ever.’”

Number 12 is…Adrian Monk, from Monk.

“Monk” premiered in 2002, at a time when I often feel good old-fashioned detective shows were on their way out, at least in the United States. Classic series like “Murder, She Wrote” and “Columbo” were nearing the end of their respective runs, and more and more people were gravitating towards what might be termed crime drama rather than Whodunnit storylines and Sherlock-Holmes-esque antics. With that said, it’s remarkable that Monk lasted as long as it did. The show ran for seven full years of straight television airtime, and was even briefly revitalized for a TV movie spin-off just last year: proof that the show’s legacy has not faded away, even after it ended nearly 15 years prior. Considering the final episode of the series broke the world record for the most viewings in cable television history at the time (a record which has, I should clarify, since been surpassed), it’s clear the series struck a chord with audiences.

I think a big part of the reason why comes from the title character: Adrian Monk himself. Monk is one of the funniest and most interesting detective characters in television history, in my opinion. He was a very different kind of sleuth, some would argue, compared to many popular detectives of the past. The humor of Monk, you see, is different from that of characters like the aforementioned Columbo or Sherlock Holmes. In those cases, these were characters who, for better or worse, everyone knew could get the job done. If they did have a silly side, it was usually either a façade to hide their inner steel, or it came from their own passions creating chaos for those around them. Monk is slightly in the latter category, but in a different way. Monk, you see…is a man who lives in fear of his own shadow. And I don’t think I mean that entirely figuratively. Sometime before the start of the series, you see, he lost his wife in a mysterious car bombing incident. The event caused an already mentally fragile Adrian to have a complete nervous breakdown, and he still hasn’t quite come out of it. As a result, Adrian Monk has become a man who is paranoid about just about everything around him. He’s a hypochondriac, has severe OCD, and his mind contains more phobias than you can really list in any concise way. Some are rational, but many are completely unfounded. He’s scared of snakes, needles, heights, enclosed spaces…even MILK he looks at with a sense of dread. Milk, I say! And that’s just to name a few!

The humor of Monk, as a result, comes from watching this man battle his own constant fear of the UNIVERSE, as he panics his way through every situation, fretting and fussing and cowering even as he scopes out scenes and picks out clues. It’s not surprising that his enemies underestimate him or that others around him get annoyed, because he’s not just pretending to be a buffoon: he’s legitimately just a constant wreck! However, through all the goofiness this setup presents – and there is a LOT of goofiness to be found – Monk is NOT an idiot. All of his overwhelming fears and nervous habits come from a very sad and fundamentally broken place, and there are times, throughout the series, where Monk shows not only a tragic vulnerability, but also a sort of inner fire and strength. When the situation calls for it, Adrian can be brought out of his shell, and shows there’s a lot more to him than just a whimpering clown. I think this is the crux of what makes the character so much fun to watch: we know he isn’t faking all this lunacy, but we also know that, at the end of the day, Monk will make the right choice, and will find some way of bringing the criminals involved in any case to justice. Many actors were considered for the role of Monk, a lot of them really big names. Some include Alfred Molina, Stanley Tucci, and the late John Ritter. In the end, the role went to Tony Shalhoub, who was sort of an actor-on-the-rise at the time. It was Monk that made Shalhoub recognized nationwide, however, and is the role he is likely best known for to this day. It’s not hard to see way: Shalhoub handles every scene absolutely perfectly, making Adrian just as sympathetic and heroic as he is absolutely ridiculous. The result is one of the most wonderfully comedic, but still competent and fascinating, characters in detective fiction, in my opinion. From battles with Tim Curry to solving the case of his late wife’s murder to trying to figure out if he’s scared of blankets or not (yes, really), Adrian Monk may not be the bravest of super sleuths…but he's certainly one of the greatest.

Tomorrow, the countdown continues with Number 11!

CLUE: “It really is very dangerous to believe people. I never have for years.”

#list #countdown #best #favorites #top 31 fictional detectives #gathering of the greatest gumshoes #number 12 #monk #adrian monk #tv #television #mystery #murder mystery #tony shalhoub

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anitabyars · 1 month ago

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If You Need Me (Toronto Terror #3)

by Helena Hunting

🏒🍑 𝗡𝗘𝗪 𝗥𝗘𝗟𝗘𝗔𝗦𝗘 🍑🏒

It’s release day for If You Need Me, a brand new enemies to lovers, fake engagement hockey romance from Helena Hunting.

A standalone enemies-to-lovers, fake engagement hockey romance.

I’ve been secretly in love with Wilhelmina Reddi-Grinst since the third grade.

I should be the one taking her to our small-town high school reunion. The prom king finally gets his chance with the valedictorian.

Except she hates me.

To the world, I’m a pro hockey player with a million dollar smile.

To Hemi, I’m the menace who (accidentally) sank her bike to the bottom of the lake.

I never thought I’d be able to right my wrongs until she took the team’s PR job.

I’d hoped I was making progress, winning her over—one geriatric polka party at a time.

Until I got drunk one night and made a mistake. A very big mistake.

Now the world thinks we’re both very much in love–—except Hemi is absolutely in loathe.

To save our jobs and reputations, we have to convince all our friends, family, and bosses that our fake relationship is the real deal.

I’ll do anything to protect her, especially if it means I get to be the best boyfriend Hemi never expected.

About Helena Hunting:

NYT and USA Today bestselling author, Helena Hunting lives outside of Toronto with her amazing family and her adorable, emotional cat, who thinks the best place to sleep is her keyboard. Helena writes everything from emotional contemporary romance to romantic comedies that will have you laughing until you cry.

Website: http://www.helenahunting.com/

Amazon: http://amzn.to/1y6OBB7

BookBub: https://www.bookbub.com/authors/helena-hunting

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/helena.hunting69/

Instagram: http://instagram.com/helenahunting

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@helenahunting

Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/helenahunting

NEWSLETTER: https://app.mailerlite.com/webforms/landing/f4p1t7

My Review

5⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

If You Need Me by Helena Hunting.

My new favorite book!! I seriously wish I could explain just how much fun this book is to read. I laughed a lot! I cried (happy tears). I found myself kicking my feet while I was giddy and swooning over how completely obsessed and deeply in love Dallas

is for Hemi.

I LOVED IT SO MUCH!

This is Dallas and Hemi’s story and I was OBSESSED by this couple and this story!

Wilhelmina, Reddi-Grinst, known by the team as Hemi, is the PR director for the Toronto Terror, the professional hockey team that Dallas Bright plays for.

Hemi is also the woman of Dallas’s dreams and has been for years. Unfortunately, she hates him and she has good reason. They’ve known each other since kindergarten, and he was part of some of her most terrible memories growing up.

So to get back at him, she enjoys signing him up for the worst of the worst: volunteer assignments, and he puts up with it all, just so he gets to be with her. But she has no idea how he feels.

But after a drunken mishap leads the world to believe they’re in a serious relationship, they must enter into a fake relationship to protect their jobs and reputations. What starts as a PR nightmare could turn into something real if Dallas can prove he’s more than her past memories.

“I’m starting to believe in those kisses, in the soft ways he shows up for me.”

Dallas is the perfect swoon-worthy hero, with his charm and vulnerability, who goes all in to win Hemi’s heart. Hemi’s strengths, confidence, and no-nonsense attitude make her an unforgettable heroine.

This enemies-to-lovers with a fake relationship twist romance captured my heart and soul, with a hot, fun-loving hockey hunk and a nerdy, outspoken heroine that works in PR.

Dallas and Hemi’s slow-burn romance is full of sassy banter, laugh-out-loud moments, angst, heartwarming scenes, anxiety complications, sizzling chemistry, and the spice…between these two is off-the-charts HOT!

Helena Hunting brings the perfect balance of humor and emotion in this entertaining, beautiful, heartwarming romance, making this my new number one read of 2024!!!

Gah. I. Am. Wowed. Five stars!

I received an early copy and this is my honest review.

#newrelease #helenahunting #IfYouNeedMe #fakerelationship #hockeyromance #bbbinfluencer #enemiestolovers #kindle unlimited #spicy read

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starfriday · 5 months ago

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⭐⭐⭐⭐

By Aniz Filmvala

**Movie Review: *It Ends with Us***

*It Ends with Us* is an absolute triumph in the realm of romantic drama, masterfully directed by Justin Baldoni. This 2024 adaptation of Colleen Hoover’s beloved novel is an emotional rollercoaster that captures the complexity of love, heartbreak, and personal growth with breathtaking precision.

Blake Lively, in the role of Lily Bloom, delivers a performance that is nothing short of mesmerizing. She embodies Lily’s strength, vulnerability, and determination, making you feel every ounce of her joy and pain. Lively’s portrayal is so deeply resonant that you can’t help but root for her as she navigates the turbulent waters of her relationships. Isabela Ferrer as young Lily is equally compelling, adding layers of depth to the character’s backstory.

Justin Baldoni, not only directing but also starring as Ryle Kincaid, brings an intensity to the screen that perfectly complements Lively’s performance. Baldoni’s portrayal of Ryle is raw and real, capturing the complexities of a man torn between love and his inner demons. The chemistry between Lively and Baldoni is electric, making their scenes together both heartwarming and heart-wrenching.

Brandon Sklenar’s Atlas Corrigan is a beacon of hope and unwavering love. His portrayal is tender yet strong, offering a stark contrast to Ryle’s volatile nature. Alex Neustaedter as young Atlas adds a beautiful touch, showing the roots of a love that never really fades.

Jenny Slate shines as Allysa, bringing humor and warmth to the story, and providing a much-needed balance to the heavier themes. The entire cast, in fact, handles the emotional weight of the story with remarkable skill, making the movie a profound exploration of love’s many forms.

Baldoni’s direction is a testament to his deep understanding of human emotions. He navigates the delicate balance between love and hate, passion and pain, with a deft hand. The narrative is beautifully paced, allowing the story to unfold naturally while keeping the audience on the edge of their seats. The film’s emotional depth is further heightened by a hauntingly beautiful score and cinematography that captures both the intimacy and the expansiveness of Lily’s world.

In conclusion, *It Ends with Us* is a cinematic gem that not only does justice to Colleen Hoover’s novel but elevates it to new heights. Blake Lively’s standout performance, supported by a stellar cast and Baldoni’s masterful direction, makes this film an unforgettable experience. It’s a story that will stay with you long after the credits roll, reminding you of the power of love, the pain of loss, and the strength it takes to move forward. Don’t miss this one—it’s a must-watch!

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princesscolumbia · 6 months ago

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I'm a sex positive parent, meaning I am very open with my daughter about sex simply being a part of life for a lot of people. This was introduced within the framework of, "There's things we can discuss when you're age x, y, and z but not before. If you have questions that drift into any of those age-gated things, I will tell you as much, give you as much information as I'm able to now, and we can revisit the things we couldn't talk about now when you reach those ages." I have adjusted this when I learn she has been exposed, in some fashion, to some of the concepts that I was going to talk with her about later. I just found out last weekend she binge watched Helluvaboss during the pandemic lockdowns, which has a LOOOOOT of references to sex related humor that has pretty solidly scrapped a lot of the age-gating I'd already established, so we've started discussing those topic now instead of waiting for her to be 18.

I'm not her only parent, and her other mother is an actively practicing conservative mormon who honestly, genuinely thinks that the pamphlet put out by the church called "For the Strength of Youth" is all anyone ever needs to know, ever, about sex-ed and everything related.

I'm not kidding.

I, at the age of 23 while she was 27, had to teach her about sexual activity that wasn't strictly "penis owner on top." Even ten years after we got married I was stumbling over gaps in her knowledge that I learned in sex-ed class in high school.

You can guess which mom our daughter goes to for things like, "How do I know if I'm a member of the queer community? Am I even someone who wants to have sex or am I ace and how do I know for sure?"

I'm the one that teaches her things like bodily autonomy and 'the Harkness Test' and yes, you can want to wear a tux to the prom and still think of yourself as a girl, but if you're genderfluid that's okay and nobody can tell you that you aren't. I tell her that if I find out she's looking at porn in any context I, as a responsible parent, will have to restrict her access to said porn until she's 18 as there's questions about when a minor should be exposed to that sort of thing. I also tell her that if she is consuming porn and wants to ask me about something she saw or read then so long as she doesn't tell me she found out about it from smut (even if it's obvious she can only encounter the topic from smut), then I'm an EMT in a Swiss Bank. You can bring me whatever you want to ask about as long as you are honest with me about your question. I'm not a cop and I don't want to know where you got your stuff, I just need to know what we're dealing with so I can address it correctly, and I'll never, ever tell a soul you asked me.

I do all this because my first exposure to what we'd now call "T4T porn" came about when I was 13 when I found a porn catalog on my walk home from school. (We obviously didn't call it "T4T porn" at the time, and I won't use the term the catalog used because it's considered offensive in some circles now) My parental figure at the time was what we'd now call a TERF. Even then I knew better than to ask a TERF about why I got really aroused when I saw T4T porn. This was the 80s, so I had no Internet to ask about it, and my exposure to the queer community was zero. My failure to understand my own sexuality and gender would lock me into a path that would keep me in my 'shell,' closetted, and married to a woman who doesn't understand that she's vulnerable to being gaslit and manipulated by her homophobic family. Even if my daughter can't do anything about it until she's of the age of majority, even if she winds up being cis-het and living in a monogamous relationship that makes her happy for the rest of her life, I want her to be armed and armored with the knowledge she needs to make informed choices, know her own boundaries, be aware of her bodily autonomy, and understand that she doesn't have to 'settle' with 'what everyone else is doing' because she just doesn't know any better.

Kids sometimes need to get their information where they can, and when that's the only way they can, do it. Don't tell me anything I'd have to report to a parent, I don't want to know if that's what would have to happen if you told me. Learn Internet safety, learn stranger danger, learn to NOT PUT YOUR GODDAMN AGE IN YOUR BIO, and learn how to lie, lie, lie about your A/S/L (That's "Age," "Sex" - a.k.a. "sexuality and gender presentation," and "Location" to all you people born after 9/11) so you protect yourself online. Medical research is your friend. Look up the Harkness Test and what 'consent' means. Don't stick things without a flared base in places where a flared base is needed. Don't transfer fluids between mucus membranes and for goddess' sake wash your damn hands like it's still 2020!

When kids have to do all that, the parents and other adults in their life failed. End of. This is a sex-positive mom giving you permission to take any guilt or shame your non-supportive parents hammered into you and drop it like it's one of those jellyfish that can kill an elephant with one sting. That's your parent's fault, not yours.

So I’m a minor (16 to be specific) and I frequently watch and read stuff with explicit sexual or 18+ content in it. I live in an extremely conservative Christian household and things like explicit fanfic are pretty much the only option I have for learning about sex that isn’t abstinence only. I do feel bad about it, especially when I see adults online say stuff like “oh i watched lots of inappropriate things as a teen that i really shouldn’t have” and it makes me feel like I’m ruining myself in a way that I won’t realize until I’m an adult? Right now I don’t see what the big deal is but i get the feeling that when i’m 24 or something I’ll wake up one day and be ashamed of this for some reason i’m not mature enough to know yet. Should I just stop and wait until I’m 18 to continue or what?

hi anon,

okay. I'm gonna hit you with something:

turning 18 does not actually change the way you feel about porn or sex or anything. the difference between being seventeen and 364 days and being 18 is nonexistent. there's not a magical switch that changes you as a person; that comes from lived experience. if you're 18 and your experience is still that porn and smut and what have you i something that you should feel bad about, it's still going to feel that way and a birthday won't change that.

look, the whole notion of "I saw [x] that I shouldn't have when I was young" is like. okay. so you saw something that was a little mature for you that you didn't quite get? awesome. did you die? no. most people's hangups about sexuality don't come from seeing a rogue titty when they were a teenager, they come from the culture that person was raised in that made seeing a rogue titty feel like something to be ashamed of instead of a completely natural part of life.

story time! when I teach my 4th-6th grade OWL classes (Our Whole Lives, great human development program) I always start by holding a meeting with the kids' parents. I've been doing this for seven years, and every time without fail some of the parents will recall seeing porn for the first time as a kid. these guys were kids when printed porn magazines were still a thing, so they were discovering them in all kinds of places - the bedrooms of their parents or their friends' parents, at bus stops, in the woods, once even stowed in some farm equipment. and they remember it feeling illicit and exciting, sure, and possibly making them confused or even horny for the first time in their young lives, but like... that's it. none of these people are irreparably damaged by seeing porn. in fact, they've grown up to be the kind of people who go out of their way to make sure their young kids are enrolled in a queer-friendly, body-positive, diversity-embracing sex ed class to counter stereotypes and misinformation they might receive elsewhere.

looking at things that arouse you is morally neutral. it can be a great way to help you learn about what turns you on, and even if it's not the best source of factual, realistic depictions of sex, it can still help you discover things - hell, I only figured out what the clitoris was by reading Young Justice fanfic (shout out Snaibsel).

you can't ruin yourself, at any age, with the media you like to consume. what makes you uncomfortable and anxious is the attitude you've been taught to have about that media, which is something that has to be actively unlearned, because it's certainly not going to just disappear on its own when you become a legal adult.

tl;dr obviously no one is making you watch porn and you shouldn't if it makes you uncomfortable, but if you drop it right now and come back when you're 18 don't expect to feel any different if you haven't done any more unpacking re: the conservative Christianity of it all.

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laughing-drawing-aces · 2 years ago

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Top 5 Joyce Byers moments? Top 5 headcanons (for any fandom or character)?

Top 5 Joyce moments:

1. When she tells brenner to go to hell - okay look people may not think about this one a lot but ummm look it’s fucking iconic and it tells so much about who she is and her strength. She’s sitting in a chair when she’s handcuffed and she knows that brenner has all the power here but she tells him to go to hell! She points out how fucked this is and how fucked he is for genuinely thinking that this bitch is going to ask for help meanwhile he made her believe that her son is dead and just is the reason behind everything. It’s just holy fuck it’s an incredible moment because in this moment brenner does have the upper hand - she’s tied to a chair and dependent on him in some way to get Will back but for one second Joyce has the power her. For one second Joyce is letting brenner know that he is a monster and that he is evil - for one moment Joyce is in power here and she is going to assert her power even when she’s not in control. And I think it says a lot about her honestly

2. Her with the lights- okay look this is an iconic scene and I just think it’s an incredible moment. Like she’s looking for Will and she’s trying to keep him safe so she decides to be resourceful and uses something that she had noticed to use to her advantage. Joyce uses this technique and it fucking works! And you can just see it on her face how proud and in awe she is of the lights and the way that they all light up! Like idk it’s just an incredible moment that is embedded into my brain

3. Her talk with hopper in season 2 about wanting it to be all over- I just love this moment because here we get a very vulnerable Joyce expressing her wants and needs without having fear of judgment about what hopper is going to say to her. She’s just talking to her friend here who would be able to understand and she just expresses what she needs and wants. Idk why but this moment gets to me

4. In season 3 whenever she starts talking about her magnets- so this is more of a collection and honestly has become a meme but honestly I think it says a lot about Joyce while also allowing a humor side to show up in here. It just shows how she has a fixation on something and when she believes it with her whole gut she won’t let it go. We already see it in season 1 but I also think that this moment of her talking about her magnets allows the audience to know that even when it isn’t a high stakes moment (since she doesn’t know that it’s the UD and why it’s happening but she’s still investigating) this trait is still a part of her.

5. Season 4 when she breaks the Russian doll - idk why this is on here but I just love this moment sooo much. She looks so adorable here and she looks so cute! Honestly I have not much to say except that lol

Headcanons:

1. I believe this is a headcanon and if it isn’t oh well lol. Sam from his time in hell learned enochian and actually knows it pretty well. I’ve seen some headcanons we’re here has a very complicated relationship with it and sometimes he’ll just read it out loud meanwhile Dean is completely confused.

2. Steve is demiromantic - I saw it once and have fr been running with this headcanon for sooo long

3. Steve gets concussions a lot and because of this sometimes his hearing isn’t the best. Idk where I read this but I’ve seen it and yeahhh I think it makes sense honestly

4. Ben misses playing the tourney or whatever it is that they played in the first movie - but he just misses playing sports general. Like I think because of his king duties he wouldn’t have gotten much of a chance to play sports and etc so I think he just honestly misses it a lot

5. Despite Sam wanting to keep his family life secret from people (which valid) I have a headcanon or I’ve seen it around that : Sam would fr say things about his life to some of his college friends and classmates that they would just have to stomach. Like Sam just brings up the wildest stories and all of his classmates/peers/friends just look at him so fucking bewildered and idk but I just love thinking about the hilarity of this situation while also thinking about the angst of this.

#answered asks #thanks :)

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sneezemonster15 · 2 years ago

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Besides naruto and sasuke, who are some of your other favorite characters?

Gaara. I related with him the most in the entire manga. His backstory was the moment when I got truly hooked. Kishi had me by his claws. I was very invested in his story and it was quite apparent that he was one of the crucial characters that would affect the plot and the protagonist in the process of which, both will undergo change, and so there was a lot of anticipation there.

Neji. While I appreciate him more in retrospect, because this was a boy who stood in the middle of the stadium where all the kages and jounins and the civilians were gathered, and fearlessly talked of oppression supported by the system at the risk of being rendered paralysed or half dead by his slavemaker curse, at the time I liked how he carried himself. Intelligent and talented, a no nonsense dude. And he shut Hinata up who was deliberately egging him on. I loved their fight during chuunin exams, I would not have minded if he were allowed to keep going on... He is individualistic and strong, he is a non conformist and has solid reasons to be that way, I appreciate that.

Deidara. He is just so much fun. Kishi can write all sorts of villains, that's one of his many strengths. He doesn't have a tragic backstory like others, and he doesn't suffer from savior complex or mad acquisition of knowledge and secrets of the world, or retribution (except for Itachi, but that's just another art driven shenanigans of his). He does it for art, lol. He is just a crazy, artsy guy who loves arson. Lol. And that makes up for interesting, engaging action.

Orochimaru. Another wonderful villain. He creates a sense of dread, a certain squirmy quality that is also very thrilling and suspense building. He is so cunning, always one step ahead. He always has an Uno reverse card in his sleeve. Lol. And his wit. Lolol. He is so catty and incisively so. He is also the product of this system and he has a very real insight into this world himself but he has been desensitized. He uses the system itself for his own objective, that benefits his own self. He is certainly a very interesting character in his own right. And he is the only adult who takes a serious stand for Sasuke and that means something. Because it is done in front of all the dead kages, no matter how strong they were.

Madara. Crazy mofo. I happen to love characters that are hella strong, intelligent, stylish, have a sense of humor and are justifiably arrogant. I love how he keeps roasting the five kages, acting like the cat playing with the little mice just for fun before killing them off. I like bloody mayhem in a battle, and this man is so skilled and so powerful, it just makes for such good and humorous action. Not to mention his crazy obsession with Hashirama, he is strong but has his vulnerabilities and doesn't care to hide them, I mean the man just plants his ass on the ground like a stubborn child in a cereal aisle when Hashi sends his clone to fight him, like he just won't be mollycoddled. He is enjoying the battle so much. He exemplifies battle lust. Also, I liked how he was not so predictable. Hashirama sends Sasuke to somehow reason with Madara seeing he looked like Izuna. But Madara wasn't having it. He won't be manipulated. The way he was backstabbed by that piddly ass Black Zetsu, just like Hashirama did, was just cruel man. Kishi and his cruel parallels.

Kakuzu and Hidan. I say both of their names because their rapport is what brings out both their characters. They are snarky, stylish, well Hidan is, smart, strong and form a good team. Their fight with Naruto, Shikamaru and the rest of the team was pretty enjoyable.

I would say Temari, she is bold, sharp, strong, confident, displays strong leadership, with a level head on her shoulders. But of course, her character is not very explored, and I wish it was. I also like sand siblings' dynamic. Kankuro also has his good moments, funny dude. I would have also liked to see Tenten been given a chance. Oh Kish..

Gai. He is a kind man, always positive but not in a toxic way. Persevered despite his handicap and worked haaard. Strong, sensitive, vulnerable, has a close bond with his team, and is the perennial cheerleader. He cares for his friends, subordinates, and doesn't back away from a fight. He was already knocking on death's door when he decided to tackle Madara, and he did it with such aplomb. Impressive. His interaction with Kisame is also quite funny. I like Kisame as well. Such a gentleman. I also like his backstory, quite a complex one.

Yamato. The perennial nanny. The babysitter. He used to work for Root so he doesn't know how to deal with other peoples' individuality. But he tries. He takes his team out for a nice stay at an expensive inn, treats them to good food, all so that his team can bond and not be at each other's throat all the time. He does care about his team, and he is always trying to be the peacekeeper. I also like his dynamic with Naruto. At first, Naruto finds him scary/weird but then finds out he is just a pumpkin on the inside. So he teases him and plays pranks, and Yamato reacts just like how an exasperated older sister would to a naughty younger brother's pranks. Lol. And he is strong and smart. He has some good comedic moments, and he learns not to take himself so seriously. I would have liked to see him in action during the war arc but sadly, Kishi decided not to have him.

Suigetsu. That boy knows how to self preserve. He is bold, funny and a little devilish. He likes chaos and doesn't care for anything other than his own interests. He owns the way he is. He doesn't pretend to be anything different. He doesn't submit to Sasuke, he calls Karin out, he makes fun of Juugo, he takes everyone on. He is entertaining. But he also supports and helps Sasuke in his effort for revolution, he is adamant about it too. I also like his pointy teeth. Heh.

#ask #naruto #deidara #orochimaru #madara #kakuzu #hidan #kisame #gai #temari

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ayamturd · 4 years ago

Text

end│dreamwastaken

summary: dream was once your everything that you would do anything for; what happens when you finally confront the reality of his manipulation and sadistic destruction?

prompt: “we’re both at fault here, and now we both have to pay the price.”

warnings: descriptive manipulation, a single curse word, angst

pairing: in-game c!dream

a/n: this is my entry for @sleepysoupi‘s 1.8k event! it goes without saying how late i am considering she’s currently working on her 2.0k event, but still a huge congratulatory to her amazing success and obvious, well deserved recognition <33 we love soupi in this household, nothing less of the fact *^*

also i know the prison doesn’t work exactly like how i wrote it, but let’s pretend for the sake of this fic

wc: (1.6k) - m.list

“Don’t do this, y/n.”

The air was sticky and heavy. As the lava bubbled behind you, it felt as if the heat could reach out and smother you entirely; the subtle warmth that felt insufferably suffocating in the tight space was a large contrast to the dark, opaque walls.

Although you stood in front of him by your own desire, habits quickly fell to place as he stood proudly above you. Chin raised, Dream’s shoulders were relaxed while he spoke to you. His words were firm, and with clenched fists, you swallowed harshly from his mocking tone.

You could practically hear his condescending grin without looking in how belittling he addressed you, and you hated how familiar the speech was.

“After all I’ve done for you, and you want to throw it all away?”

Despite all attempts, you unconsciously bowed your head down. Whether in unjustified guilt or the internal rage from his lies, you couldn’t say yourself. He noticed nonetheless, and played into your vulnerability further.

He was the one defenseless in this scenario, yet he held all the power in the small cage between the two of you.

“We made promises! ‘Till the very end, right?!” He began to raise his voice and feigned some form of heartbreak, taking a step dangerously closer to you while you stood there in frozen fear.

Staring harshly down at your feet, the weight of gravity pulled at your tears as they trickled down sparsely. This was different than when you originally confronted him mere hours ago. Here, you were alone and with no backing, no one to reassure you that you did the right thing. That he was a monster that had you blinded for so long.

That you were justified for betraying Dream.

“Don’t play stupid with me now. You can’t act like I did this all alone. That I’m not the only sick fuck in the room who enjoys the-”

“Stop it,” you whispered with closed eyes. While your voice was small, it echoed so loudly and threw Dream off guard. He shook his head and with a dark chuckle, sneered disparagingly.

“You really th-”

Your eyes opened as you unexpectedly interrupted him.

“No. For once in my life, I mean it. Shut your egotistical mouth for one goddamn second.”

Everything was in a frozen stand still as you snapped.

Course tears ran steadily down your cheeks, yet your eyes held more strength than Dream could had ever perceived in that moment. It had been so long since you had lost your voice. Lost your confidence, your fire that drew him in in the first place. It had been so long since you felt like yourself again, the person you once were before he teared you down completely to his mercy.

You swallowed sternly in exposed anxiety; when was the last time you saw his face like this? Saw his face at all, at that.

The molten lava radiated the room, it being the main source of light in contrast to the faint glow of the lanterns built into the walls. When you had originally requested to see him one final time before he was officially locked away for good, you had no idea what you expected to see. You didn’t see anything, actually, since you couldn’t bring yourself to try and meet his eye line the entire time.

Until now.

As the magma shaded the room in a warm shine, his dull eyes gleamed a faded hue of ash green. His dirty blond hair was visible without his signature hoodie, his previous clothes stripped away and replaced with an attired uniform instead. He hid behind a mask for so long, it was surreal to see him as something so mundane and human.

Your mouth felt so dry from seeing him again. He almost looked like when you first laid eyes on him, that beautiful day when you thought you had fallen in love. How nice the sun felt, and how crisp the wind blew. The summer day was fresh and the sweet smell of honey pervaded the air. To think it was by mere chance he approached you in the white flower field, hidden in the depths of the forest with a charming smile and gentle hand.

How cruel reality liked to play with you and give you false hope that such love could truly exist.

The memory brought a smoldering rage that made your heart race in return. Back straight, you dared a step towards him with a quiet, yet firm declaration.

“I’m done making excuses for your lies. For your actions, for the hurt you cause, for you.”

Dream could barely register your words as you continued in growing fury. It was like the floodgates were open and you felt free to speak your truth.

You were riding this new found wave and would hold nothing back anymore.

“I let you get away with so much because I truly believed that I loved you. That my love could fix you, or change what you are.”

You stepped forward again, your finger shakily pointed at him. His mouth opened to respond but you spoke before he could try. You weren’t going to give him anything, you thought, he doesn’t deserve your silence.

“I went against everything I believed!” you suddenly yelled, “everything I stood for, everything I thought because of you!”

Your vision was a blur as your raw emotions came loose. You screamed from the top of your lungs to the point where your voice cracked with a head lifted high.

“I let people get hurt! People I love and care for because I prioritized you over everything I had!”

Another step forward, your voice shook with quivered lips as a result of an ached and long scorned heart.

“To think I used to be so proud to say it, to say you were my everything and my world.” With a trembled exhale, you gathered yourself before finishing your thought. “Maybe I am stupid, but trust me when I say my ignorance was your freedom and my considered love a blind devotion.”

Dream’s face softened considerably, for he was at a loss for words and didn’t have anything to probe at anymore. It was his turn to suffer in a lost acceptance.

“I��”

Shaking your head, you scoffed with your head tilted in disbelief. Smiling darkly, you knew then and there you regained the power of the room and your self-assurance over him. How the turn tables.

“Funny how things change when you have no where to run. When you’re the one helpless and reliant.”

Standing strong with your arms crossed, you stared at him with such distaste. Dream’s brows furrowed with a clench jaw as he stepped even closer to you. He was now mere inches away and glared down at you from his given height. Even then, you wouldn’t back down any longer.

“I do love you, y/n. Everything I did, I did for us. You can’t leave me like this.” He gazed down with such intensity that your past you would have wanted to say something just to appease him entirely; you weren’t that person anymore, and you wouldn’t let him drag you down more than he already has.

Dropping yours arms before stepping back, you messaged Sam without wavering your eye contact from him.

“We’re both at fault here, and now we both have to pay the price of it alone.”

The sounded mechanics from outside the box indicated the lava dropping, signifying the end of your visit. Dream grew agitated at the thought of you leaving and dropped his eyes down in resent, a huge contrast to your relaxed and calm state.

You moved backwards until your back threatened to be burned by the heat.

“Here’s to loosing all those attachments you mentioned.”

Dream’s head snapped up from your words, but before he could attempt anything further, the Netherite divider rose and separated you both. The lava parted as you approached the platform, Sam visible from across the entrapping moat. He watched closely in regard to your safety and anything Dream might try with your back currently turned.

Approaching the stone platform once deemed safe, you turned to face him a final time as the contraption slowly pulled you away. Your chin was raised, and your tears were dry in satisfaction to your found closure.

“You were right,” you affirmed, “we did make promises, and this is our end.”

Bonus:

Tommy had been tormenting Dream for the past few minutes or so, his obnoxious taunts a sign of recovery from all the trauma he had dealt with from his young age. He hid behind his humor, but was strong when confronting his abuser with no uncertainty then.

“Who do you miss the most?”

Dream paused from fiddling with the leather of the book covers from the simple question. His hand began to curl around the thick material, and he drowned out Tommy’s rambling from behind him.

A familiar scent filled his senses, an old and precious memory uncovered from the oppressed depths of his mind. He pulled the book in hand open to a random, but intentional page, his callous fingers tracing over the stained ink.

He wasn’t an artist, and it easily would have been passed for messy, nonsense doodles, yet the drawing practically burned the paper as a reminder of his failed objectives.

The innocent azure bluets insulted him despite being his own creation.

Dream was done playing into Tommy’s confidence, and spoke lowly as his head turned further away from the boy.

“… I think you should go, Tommy."

#dream smp x reader #dream smp x you #dreamwastaken x reader #dreamwastaken x you #dream x reader #dream x you #dream x gn!reader #mcyt x reader #mcyt x you #dreamwastaken x gn!reader #dreamwastaken imagine #dsmp x reader #sleepysoupi 1.8k writing event

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softboyluvr · 3 years ago

Text

just friends

cedric diggory x female!reader

warnings: angst (ish???), intentional lower caps, that’s all tbh

very few could say they knew someone for forever, someone that knew their weaknesses and helped turn them into strengths. though they, they were the lucky ones. or unlucky ones, depending on who you asked. cedric and her had been inseparable the moment their parents introduced them when they were children.

from then on she always had someone to pick her up when she fell off the swings, a shoulder to cry on and someone who listened unconditionally when it seemed like the voices drowned her. she was lucky to have him.

she brought out the best in him. everyone expected him to be everything all the time, but with her he could be vulnerable. he felt like he could breathe when she was near. he had to see her fall in love with some of the guys in the castle, and then be there for her when it all fell through. he was just never that lucky to have her. at least not completely, she had the best of his moments. when in fourth year his friends teased him for never having had his first kiss she was the one to pull him in by his jersey after winning the first game of the quidditch season, the light drizzle sticking to their hair and making the whole thing seem like a dream to him. she had his first dance at their first ever ball. and most of all she had his heart hanging off a thread on her pinky finger, yet he was never lucky enough to have her completely.

he was resigned actually, no longer eager for the next time she came running to his arms after she realized the last guy wasn’t what she wanted, much less deserved. an eagerness that he knew was wrong and completely selfish but he couldn’t seem to deny. he liked being the guy that lit her those vanilla candles she loved so much and held her through the night.

he didn’t know what deity he had to thank for putting them together in every single class for the past six years. but there he was, letting her draw some sort of happy face kaleidoscope on his hand as he just looked at her with some stupid grin he could never wipe off when they were together. looking at how the tip of her tongue stuck out in concentration and then down to the crystal hanging around her neck. remembering how one saturday she just dragged him to the lake to look for crystals. one of the last days of the summer, the morning sun keeping them warm but not sticky with sweat. the wildflowers around them made the air sweet and the soft swishing of the water in the river filled up their comfortable silence making everything perfect. if he were asked what he thought heaven was like he would think that’s the closest it could ever get. or maybe it was all perfect because he was with her.

he wasn’t surprised when she had to bring him back from his daze and put him to work on the potion slughorn had just spent the last 10 minutes explaining. he was eager to finish brewing the concoction, amortentia was one of their biggest projects of the year. but that was not what motivated him to finish it, neither was it finding out what he was going to smell. he knew exactly what his heart desired, and was not surprised when he smelled vanilla, soft rain and wildflowers. his eagerness was to discover what she was going to describe the potion to smell like. he hoped her heart’s deepest desires pointed towards him like a compass pointing north. he was about to ask when hermione granger, somehow managing to take classes above her level, turned around and asked herself.

he pretended to write some notes on his notebook when he was really waiting for anything that would hint at her fancying him the way he wished she would.

“we must’ve fucked it up because it smells like nothing” and she snorted like it was the funniest thing ever. their conversation carried but he was no longer interested on any sort of gossip the griffindoor carried. he knew the potion had worked, so either she was sick and her nose was all messed up or just didn’t fancy anyone at all. she could’ve also been lying, was it for his sake? did she just not want to share any more fragments of her love life with him and she decided to lie about this to keep some secrecy? was it someone he knew? was it one of their friends? had he introduced her to them?

class ended and the day flew by, whenever she asked about his change in demeanor he brushed her off with a smile and assured her it was all fine, “just tired ‘s all”

he wanted to go down to his room and read, alone, as soon as the school day was over. but he had promised to go with her to this tree they always hung out in when the day was nice. she was talking about things she had noticed throughout the day and when he zoned back into the conversation their tree was closer than he realized and she was talking about potions class.

“i swear i was keeping an eye out for you. i was worried you were sick because someone had slipped some amortentia on your water or something. i mean im surprised no one did” and she sat down leaning on the trunk of the tree. “anyways you never did tell me what it was your heart’s deepest desires were. or who is it that that is for that matter” she was taking some colored pencils out and it seemed like the whole thing was humorous to her. but the question had struck him, she was lying back in class.

she had taken his silence as a cue to keep her chatter going. not paying any mind to how he still hadn’t sat down. “i heard someone say how when slughorn showed the class below us the potion just as a heads up for next year cho chang said she swore she smelled you. i didnt know you guys were that close” and she wiggled her eyebrows at him while taking out some sketch book from her bag. she was really trying to joke with him right now. “she’s really pretty-“

but he cut her off. “why would you lie?”

“i swear! hermione told me all about it after i ran onto her in the bathroom before potions class started. i mean you have been tutoring her for a while now so i don’t know how you didn’t see it coming”

he was silent for a second and she grew uncomfortable of his gaze just lingering. standing up as he started again.

“we didn’t fuck up the bloody potion. but you told granger we did, why did you lie?”

she looked at him for a couple seconds and then laughed. “come on ced, slughorn said the thing was perfect. don’t worry about the grade”

“this is not about a mark and you know it” his tone was so serious it was bordering into stern. it was like his patience was growing thin but she didn’t know what to say, so she just shrugged and looked away.

“didn’t feel like talking about it then”

“we can talk about it now”

“it looks like there’s rain clouds coming”

“what are you trying to avoid?”

she just went to pick up her book, stuffing her things back into her bag. she started the walk back to the castle making him scoff and follow her lead.

“why don’t you want to talk to me?” to her he still sounded defensive. but he was trying his best to mask his vulnerability.

“i do want to talk to you ced. just not about it right now”

“was it someone i know? was it fred? i heard he’s with angelina so that’s a dead end you know”

“cedric just drop it”

“so it was him then”

she groaned and turned to look at him, breaking her stride. her face was burning with what he saw as anger.

“why does it matter so badly to you cedric?”

the thunder quickly ate up the good weather they still had and the air turned chilly. how fitting.

“it just does and i want to know”

“it really doesn’t matter to me and it shouldn’t to you either” she was upset about it, maybe her feelings for fred were far deeper than he could guess. he was aware of their friendship, but he never knew how close they had grown to be. maybe him being a tutor pushed her to finding someone new, some new more interesting friend. “i really don’t get why you’re blowing this to be such a big deal when cho-“

“it is a big deal to me” he chuckled and he saw the drizzle before he could feel it. “it’s a big deal to me when all i could smell on the thing was wildflowers and fresh rain” he let a breath out, his voice lowering back to its usual tone. no longer exasperated but tired. “fresh rain and vanilla”

she just stood there. quiet. looking at him. a couple steps and he had broken the distance between them. placing his hands on her shoulders and running them down to her hands.

“so please, just please tell me what it was for you”

“lilacs” she looked up at him and met his gaze. the flowers his mother had planted around the swing sets were lilacs, the flowers she tucked on his suit pocket on their first dance were lilacs. but he still couldn’t let his heart jump to conclusions. she took in the silence and looked forward, staring at his chest rather than looking at him in the eyes. the blow was coming. “warm sheets and fresh rain”

she smiled at the irony of the drizzle that covered her hair at the moment and dared to peek at him from under her lashes. he was puzzled by the last one. she kept looking down at his hands holding hers.

“that was my first kiss too you know, you never really asked and i guess i never told you. but i knew you were tired of everyone teasing you for it so i guessed you wouldn’t mind as long as you got it over with” she was rambling and he smiled. the rain coating her lashes reminded him of the first time, he let go of her hand and took her chin between his pointer and thumb. tilting her head up to look at him, moving his hand to run through her hair and finally cupping her face. running his thumb over her cheek. it was like he was getting a do over, and he wanted to take his time this time around. she looked into his eyes and then glanced down to his lips. he didn’t waste more time before his other hand flew to the free side of her face and his lips were on hers. her hands on his shoulders pulling him impossibly closer to her.

he cursed his lungs for preventing him from staying there, causing him to pull away slightly. she opened her eyes to see him looking at her already. he took in how the water droplets stuck to her hair and the smile that danced on her face.

her eyebrows shot up a little “took you long enough” her teasing smile made him let out a loud laugh.

he hummed and nodded. feigning seriousness “maybe” he looked at her with a teasing smile of his own. “but not nearly as long as it took you, now did it”

her eyebrows shot up and she let out a surprised laugh. he admired her for a second more before he leaned down to kiss her again. missing how she quickly ducked and escaped his grasp. starting to sprint through the grass towards the castle. he chased behind her as they both laughed at the water splashing around their feet and starting to soak them up slowly. she looked back at him and playfully screamed, booking it through the courtyard and slipping past the few people that were still out enjoying the soft rain.

their friends quickly spotted the pair, not surprised by their behavior but intrigued as to what had caused the giant to chase after her through the rain. watching as he was catching up to her when she had almost reached the group, which was seated waiting for them next to one of the arches surrounding the courtyard. staying safe from the rain under the roof. they all playfully looked at her catching her breath, not amused at all by their games when he reached her. hair sticking to his forehead and robes drenched just like hers. she yelped as he picked her up and spun her around, their friends getting ready to listen to whatever story was behind their chase.

the story telling itself when he set her down softly and pulled her in for a quick kiss. their bubble of happiness not popping but encasing all of their friends as well. no questions were needed, the happiness just flowed and bubbled.

he swung his arm over her shoulders. pulling her into his chest as she started the conversation back up. everything had fallen into place for him, and now he could light up candles and tuck her into bed not because she had another unlucky shot at love. but because he was finally lucky enough.

#cedric diggory x reader #cedric diggory #cedric diggory fluff #cedric diggory angst #cedric diggory x female reader #cedric diggory imagine #friend to lovers

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zotlel · 4 years ago

Text

Fall Into You (M) - 02

pairing: jaebeom x you

genre: romance, angst, series, eventual smut

synopsis: Your love life has been filled with nothing but bad experiences. Determined to give up on the idea of finding the one you meet a man who is desperate to change your mind and have you see him as more.

word count: 5.0k

Your skull feels as if it weighs over a hundred pounds, while your body was floating down a murky river of despair. You couldn’t bring yourself to open your eyes. All you know in this moment is that you need water. Now.

Mustering up as much strength as humanly possible you swing your leg from your bed and hurry over to your bathroom. Hangovers are when you are at your lowest as a human. Craning your neck under your sink faucet you try to capture as much water as possible and allow it to slide down your throat. Once satisfied you shut off the water and try to steady yourself. Peeling one eye open at a time you notice that you were still in last night’s attire and also neglected to remove one of your boots.

Last night? What happened last night?

Your brain begins to reel back in time to remember just how exactly you became as blackout drunk as you did. Last night, you can remember that Sofie and you were going to one of Dominic’s new restaurants, Jake couldn’t come.

Okay, yes, this is good, now what else?

You neglected to eat dinner since you were worried about feeling bloated in your tight pants you were wearing. Opening your eyes again you look down at your jean-clad legs to confirm this much was true, and that also explained why you became so drunk so quickly. Dominic kept sending over tequila shots, his way of trying to harass you for the night the two of you hooked up while drunk off tequila, but you could never reject free drinks.

And then something else, something important happened.

A man!

Yes, that was it, a man came and sat in the booth with you when Sofie said she wanted to leave. You remember talking a lot to him and thinking he was incredibly handsome, but God you just could not remember his face or name for that matter.

His lips pressed deeply against yours as he cradled your cheek, heat spread over your body as desire licked at your loins.

The flashback of kissing a total stranger last night has you smacking your forehead in embarrassment. How can you not even remember who you kissed last night? Did it stop there? Or did you also sleep with this man?

Jesus, you really were a train-wreck.

You groan to yourself when suddenly you hear something coming from your bedroom. Dread fills your body as you slowly turn to find the cause of the noise. This really could not be happening to you right now. Slowly you make your way to your bedroom to see a stray man with dark hair stretching his limbs in the morning light. Well, that confirmed your precious worries of whether or not you had sex last night. You never stayed the night with men, let alone in your bedroom, you must have been drunk out of your mind.

You stay still in the doorway as you watch the man slowly turn to meet your eyes. Not only was there a strange man in your bed, but it just had to be him. Jaebeom smiled lightly at you while rubbing the remnants of sleep out of one eye. You felt as if you were going to be sick.

“Hey, did you sleep okay?” Jaebeom asks you in his gruff morning voice.

You suddenly felt so exposed, so vulnerable, even while still in your clothes you felt as if you were naked to a crowd of a thousand eyes. His eyes were light, and slowly your memories of last night began to stitch together. Sofie wanted to leave when Jaebeom noticed you two, he had approached you wanting to apologize for New Year’s, but you were more interested in him than hearing any sort of apology. You talked for what felt like hours while he just listened and looked at you, with those same twinkling eyes. You may have also cried, hard to say for sure.

“U-Uh yes, fine,” you cough awkwardly. How can you be standing in the same room with someone you cried in front of and then proceed to fuck? The discomfort was sweeping through your body like a tidal wave, “I’m really sorry for last night.”

“Trust me there’s nothing to be sorry for,” Jaebeom says as he starts to fix your bedding.

How could you let this happen? Was your self-discipline really so low that you would go back on your word about no hookups in a mere week? Albeit that Jaebeom happened to be one of the most gorgeous men you have seen, it was no excuse. This was your time for healing and being alone, just like Sofie said. How can you ever be trusted?

“Everything okay? You look like you’re about to be sick,” Jaebeom must have noticed the worsening expression on your face as you scolded yourself internally. You bring a hand to your forehead attempting to get a grip of reality. The world felt as if it was spinning and flipping all around you like you were in some sort of tortuous drying machine.

“I’m just feeling really shitty. I think it’s best if you leave,” you tell him.

To your surprise, Jaebeom nods his head in understanding and begins to make his way past you towards your bedroom door without any sort of complaint. You figure it would probably be best to walk him through the hall to your front door just in the case of your roommate being scared to death by a stranger in the apartment. Silently you tread behind Jaebeom, his shoulders were wide as they sloped past your narrow hallway, you couldn’t help but admire.

As the two of you begin to reach the door Jaebeom suddenly stops and turns to you. He says nothing as he only just stares into your eyes. You began to feel so small in his presence, the way his eyes looked so desperately at your own, searching for something you knew you didn’t have. With shame filling your body you instead turn your eyes to the floor, Jaebeom realizes your discomfort and reaches his hand to the doorknob.

Still, with his back to you, he says something just loud enough for your ears, “If you ever need anything, call me. I saved my number in your phone.”

“S-Sure, thanks I will,” your body feels hot at his words, he nods once before leaving your apartment, shutting the door softly behind him.

You stand there unable to move from your spot as you process everything that just happened. Your hookup with Jaebeom, your lack of memory, his genuine concerning tone, and most of all how kind he was. Your brain felt like mush as you struggled to get a grip on this strange man. In your whole history of one-night stands, this one was by far the most confusing for you.

Once you are able to clear these headache-inducing thoughts from your head you look up and see you have just about twenty minutes until you have to be at work. As if an alarm went off in your brain you begin to hurry down the hall and speedily rid yourself of the remnants from the night before. As much as you did enjoy the occasional, oh who were you kidding, the frequent cocktail, you prided yourself in always being professional and punctual when it came to your career. Let’s face it, you were a competent woman playing in a man’s world and those people would do anything to see you knocked down a peg.

You make quick work of straightening out your business attire and smoothing your hair into a low bun, you could worry about makeup while on the subway. You leave the door in a huff and begin to make your way to the station. All the while you could not help but try to rack your brain about the events that happened the previous night.

You moaned softly into his ear as he began to slip his fingers inside your panties, dripping with desire he slowly drew a finger around your arousal.

Your hand that had been applying mascara stops at the memory. You sit dazed while the subway softly rocks you back and forth as it trugs along the underground tracks. This was bad. Not only did you sleep with Jaebeom, but you also very much enjoyed it according to your memories. The moments the two of you shared were incredibly vivid in your mind. But oh, did you long for his touch. It hadn’t even been twelve hours since the encounter but your body was already yearning for the way his body felt on yours.

Fuck, this was bad, you thought.

You could deal with all kinds of men and the memories they left you with. The memories of disgust, anger, heartbreak, even resentment. But you had absolutely no idea what to do with this feeling of longing. Longing for a man you barely knew was not something you were going to allow yourself. Was your resolve really this weak?

The subway announces the arrival of your stop breaking your internal melodrama and effectively allowing you to shift your gears into work-mode. If you can just get through this workday you will probably never even have to see that man again. And if you did then you were going to tell him exactly how you felt.

No not felt, what you knew.

You know that for both of your sanities you could not even begin to humor the idea of having any sort of relationship with him. You were not looking for any sort of man in your life. Whether that be a boyfriend or a friend with benefits type. You needed time alone, and for him to enter your life at this time is just wrong on every level.

You settle into work easily enough once you reach your office. The familiarity of your workspace helped kick any lingering thoughts out the door. The sounds of quick fingers against keyboards, a smell of old coffee and ink cartridges fluffing through the air, and of course the heavy stares of your male colleagues as they picked apart your every step. You pay them no mind as you settle into your office and log into your desktop.

“Would you care for some coffee Ms. L/N?” Stacy, the new intern had just popped her head into your office the moment you sat. Stacy was smart and diligent, she stayed late to do the higher-up’s paperwork and always made sure to hold her tongue. Good girl. It just upset you dearly that a person of her capabilities was stuck with no pay and fetching coffee.

“Yes Stacy, thank you for asking,” you replied back.

She smiled sweetly at you before exiting your office. Waiting not a second longer you begin to check your work email as usual responding to your clients. Your fingers ran fast across your keyboard as you simultaneously would respond and keep one eye on the market to see if you had lost any money for any of your investors. The green arrows that flowed steadily at your bottom screen gave you a sense of relief as you began to allow yourself to sink into your work and forget about everything else.

To some, the work you do may seem dull. You understood why exactly they would think that, but it was so far from the truth. You found such a thrill in the way the stock market worked. The uncertainty of it all kept you hungry to know more. Because let’s face it, nobody, not even stock managers like yourself, knew if you were about to lose all of your assets or turn someone into a millionaire. It was quite a thrill for you, and if you were being quite honest, you had a damn good intuition about these types the things. Which is how you became the youngest stock manager in your division with a million-dollar reputation at your back, but you weren’t much for bragging.

You would question yourself as you looked around the room at your coworkers. Most of whom lived in penthouses and rolled up to work in their glittering Mercedes. How was it that you carried most of the company’s reputation on your back alone, yet you were still living in a two-bedroom flat in the meat-packing district? You looked up from your computer as you remembered, no woman as competent as yourself has come as far as you have in this company. Therefore you had to tread a new road for younger women who would surely come after you.

Stacy walks into your office quietly as she leaves a fresh coffee on a coaster near your workstation. You forced a tight smile as a thank you. You had to pave the road for people like her. Because here was a brilliant mind fresh from Harvard business and yet her biggest responsibility was remembering how everyone took their coffee.

You try to ignore these disgruntled feelings as suddenly your phone begins to ring. Snapped from your thoughts you reach for the device to answer the call.

Before you speak a gruff voice is heard through the speaker, “Y/N can I see you in my office?”

Your boss’s voice is low as it rumbles out the request. Right away, you tell him as you set the phone back down and begin to make your way towards his office abandoning your fresh coffee. You make your way towards the end of the younger manager’s offices until you are perched directly in front of massive double doors. You knock twice before entering, seeing your boss up from his desk gazing out of his floor-to-ceiling window.

Mr. Hobbes was considered a young man for his CEO position at your company. You were never sure of his exact age due to his overwhelming need to keep his life as private as possible. His hair was just on the brink of becoming an ashy tone but still had flicks of golden locks throughout. Hobbes was always nicely shaven and had a distinct green smell that just screamed “wealth.” He was one of the only men in the office who never tried to hit on or belittle you. Therefore, he was tolerable.

“Come join me,” Hobbes calls out to you, never looking away from his window.

With a deep sigh, you make your way over to stand near him and overlook his office view alongside him. The two of you stood silently next to each other and just watched. The people, cars, birds, and just about everything that made movement outside. It was odd. Standing as close as you were to one of the most powerful men in the country you would think it would shake you. Yet you felt absolutely nothing.

“You have a brilliant mind,” he begins next to you, “Did you know that?

“Haven’t thought too much about it, I just try my best just like everyone else,” you respond back honestly.

At this Hobbes laughs, “You haven’t thought too much about it.”

He then turns to you. His deep turquoise eyes staring you down, blue eyes were your least favorite color. They felt cold and distant, madness could be hidden behind them. Hobbes’s eyes were different, instead of the cold, you could feel a warm breeze on an ocean. He was a comfortable person to be around.

“Well, would it be terribly rude of me to start asking you to think about it? To think about your future,” he asks you.

“Not rude at all, I would just like to know your reasoning behind these questions.”

Your boss walks away from the window to take a seat at his large mahogany desk. Wordlessly he requests you to sit across from him in one of the smaller chairs. You make your way over to sit politely hoping to God he couldn’t tell that you got dressed in less than five minutes this morning.

“I want to make you the head of recruiting,” Hobbes says to you.

You can’t help but let your eyes widen at his words. Head of an entire department. Sure you were good at what you did but you had only been working at this company for three years. This was surely too soon for such a big promotion.

“Head?” You ask him again to which he nods. “Sir, with all due respect, am I not under qualified for that sort of position?”

“I don’t give a damn about qualifications or years of experience. I care about numbers, and yours are good, no, they’re the best.” He begins to say, “I need more brilliant minds like yours so I figure why not take the best manager we’ve got and have her show the newbies how it’s done.”

To say you were complimented would be an understatement. You were shocked that Hobbes felt this way about you. While working at the company he mostly had kept to himself, rarely would you see him out on company dinners or even speaking during meetings. He was withholding so much power that you never dared to get on his bad side.

“I don’t know what to say.”

“Then don’t say anything yet,” Hobbes says. “Take time to think about it and come back to me with an answer by the end of the quarter.”

You nod your head at this, thanking him first you begin to stand and make your way towards his door. Before you are able to leave, your boss calls your name, you turn to see he had been following close behind.

“Don’t let yourself think you are incapable,” he tells you. “I know talent when I see it and you’ve got it, Kid.”

You smile bashfully trying to avoid his eye contact. He laughs lightly at you before patting your shoulder gently in an encouraging way. You then turn to walk away once more and return to your office.

“That’s a good girl,” Jaebeom whispers in your ear as you feel his cock penetrate your dripping core from behind.

You turn back around shocked and look at your boss. Hobbes was staring curiously at your expression waiting for you to speak.

“I’m sorry did you say something?” You ask, afraid for the answer.

“I said you’re a smart girl Y/N,” he smiles lightly before turning his back to you and returning to his desk.

Your cheeks are hot from the misunderstanding as you quickly make your way to leave his suffocating office. Quick feet down the hallways as you desperately try to reach your office without having anyone notice your frazzled state. Slamming your office door your back meets the cool surface as you try and regain your normal heart-rate from the erotic memory.

You put your head in your hands to attempt to grab a hold of your subconscious. This situation was worse than you thought. How can one night of sex with Jaebeom be haunting you this much? Was it really that incredible? You sit back as you laugh at your own question. It was more than incredible. It was the best you have ever had.

You decided it would probably be best for you to drown yourself in work for the rest of the day. You needed so desperately for something to help distract you from your wandering mind, thank God statistics and economics had absolutely no sex appeal.

Time ticked on throughout your office. Your eyes stayed glued to your desktop screen but you could tell that the lights had begun to dim settling into the night around you. Fellow workers could be seen stretching their sore limbs high in the air before they gathered their things to leave. Quiet goodbyes were exchanged amongst the masses as everyone decided their life outside of this office would be a much greater place to be.

You on the other hand could not let yourself be spared a single moment to yourself. It was the moment when the sensory lights had triggered to turn off in your office that you finally took in your surroundings. Once again you were the only person left in the office. With a big sigh you lean far back in your chair, elongating your spine against the back of the chair you begin to finally feel the exhaustion in your body.

Deciding it was probably best for you to leave, you quickly gather your things and make your way out of the building. The bitter January air had you holding your coat closer to your body to try and conserve as much heat as possible. The other people passing you along the street seemed unaffected by the weather, it was after all a Friday night. Your workplace happened to be in the dead-center of the hippest club scene in your city. It was fun for you to watch people as you made your way to the underground subway station. With your headphones in, a soft calming melody played to assist in healing your slight headache as you watch young men and women laugh and hang off one another. You smile lightly admiring the way they all looked so alive and happy.

The ride through the subway was nothing out of the ordinary. You would occasionally catch yourself dozing off only for the loud blaring station announcements to wake you from your short-lived slumber. On your cold walk home from the subway station to your apartment, you couldn’t help but think about how nice a hot shower sounded.

Lost in your own world you hardly notice there was a certain new constant man in your life sitting on the front steps of your apartment. Quickly you remove your earphones from your ears, just then he notices your presence. Jaebeom looks up to you, smiling slightly, he rises to his feet until he is standing right in front of you. He smells like spring rain.

“Jaebeom, what are you doing here?” Suddenly feeling incredibly insecure about your appearance under his hot stare you make quick work to smooth down your frizzy hair.

“I just needed to talk with you,” he says, the heat of his words causing a cloud to release with it in the chill of the city night.

“About what?”

He laughs slightly at your accusatory tone. Jaebeom takes in the scenery around him, the dimly lit neighborhood streets illuminated where the two of you stood. Softly rubbing the back of his neck Jaebeom tried to calm his own nerves.

“Well, we had a really good time last night, right?” Jaebeom asks you now, looking you directly in the eyes. You blush at this, remembering all the flashbacks you had been getting during your busy workday. It was now your turn to get shy as you look to your feet, too flustered to meet his stare. A slight wind worked its way between your bodies as if to wrap the two of you in one cold embrace.

“I just wanted to come here and ask you properly,” he says, causing you to look up at him curiously. “I wanted to ask you on a proper date.”

Jaebeom speaks while searching your eyes nervously, afraid himself that he may have misread the connection the two of you had. You yourself could not deny the chemistry you felt with Jaebeom. Sleeping together was one thing, but you were nowhere in the right headspace to be dating right now. If only you had met him later when you were fixed.

“Jaebeom I’m flattered really,” you begin to say, already cringing at your lame line. “Us hooking up last night was a mistake on my part. I am not in the right place to be with anyone.”

You continue your rant as Jaebeom looks perplexed.

“Sleeping together, dating… I can’t do any of it right now. So I’m sorry but I just don’t think this,” your hand waves between your two bodies for emphasis. “Is going to happen.”

You realize what you said was harsh. Hell, if you were on the other end of this rhetoric with a guy you really liked you would be crushed. Unfortunately, you had to be this upfront with men. You’ve tried subtly in the past, and somehow these guys just never understood that you were not interested. After much trial and error, you have discovered being upfront, albeit harsh, was the best solution.

“I-” Jaebeom begins to speak but then suddenly laughs. You stare at him with confusion. You expected a certain reaction from him, but laughter definitely caught you off-guard. Jaebeom can hardly contain himself as he turns to try and calm himself. Meanwhile, you stood just waiting to hear his explanation for his strange reaction.

“That explains this morning then I guess…” Jaebeom says to himself causing your patience to dwindle.

“I totally understand you not being ready,” he finally calms himself down enough to speak with you. “But Y/N, we did not hook up last night.”

Your head recoils back in shock and confusion, you stare into Jaebeom’s eyes trying to see if he was somehow using this as some sort of power-play against you. When looking at his eyes though, all you could find was sincerity.

How can this be true? You distinctly remember separate occasions of him from last night while sleeping with him. Come to think of it though, you were fully dressed when you woke up, and so was Jaebeom. Can you even remember coming home with him? Your mind was completely blank.

“After the restaurant, I walked you home,” Jaebeom can sense your confusion from your facial features and decides to fill in the empty space. “Once I got you home you asked me to come inside to make sure you got to bed. You started to get really upset once we got to your room so I lied with you in bed for a bit until you calmed down, and then I must have fallen asleep after then.”

Your cheeks are burning bright red, as you do in fact remember everything Jaebeom just said to be true. You remember sobbing once you got to your bed, you remember asking him to hold you. If you could die from embarrassment, you would already be standing in your grave.

“But I remember things from last night, I remember us kissing and you-” you try and salvage your shameful memories, but have a hard time getting yourself to say that you remember him fucking you.

“And I?”

“You, touching me…” You look up at him and see a tinge of amusement on his face at your shy confession.

“Well I have to say, I am truly flattered you had a very vivid dream about me,” his smirk on his face is accompanied by a red tinge in his cheeks thinking of the two of you becoming intimate.

“But I can assure you we just slept next to each other, I would definitely remember if more happened.”

He laughed lightly clearly finding this whole situation to be just one big misunderstanding. This was so angering for you to hear though. Jaebeom was now openly mocking you in your eyes for the thoughts that attacked you all day.

“I’m so glad you find this amusing, now if you don’t mind I would like to go inside and forget last night ever happened,” your words hold little meaning as the anger controls your tongue.

Jaebeom looks surprised at your reaction as you attempt to move past him. He can now clearly see you did not find this situation funny in the least bit.

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to upset you,” Jaebeom is frantic as you pass by him trying to reach your door. Softly he grasps your wrist causing you to look back and see his pained expression as he worries if he has hurt you.

“I understand you’ve gone through a lot,” he begins to say. “I just know what that feels like and it’s nearly impossible to go through those feelings alone.”

“You know absolutely nothing about me Jaebeom. Don’t feel special just because I used you as an emotional dumpster when I was too drunk to realize what I was doing.”

You can feel the peak beginning to approach in your anger and it almost scares you. The last time you blacked out from your anger, it took more than apologies to recover the damage.

“You need to back the fuck off,” you spit venom at him.

He seems completely thrown back from your harsh words. His eyes are pleading with you, worrying that he might have upset you beyond repair. Behind all this banter Jaebeom cared for you as a person and he wanted more than anything for you to see him as more than just another man. He would never even think of trying to control or suppress you. He wanted so much more from you, he needed to know so much more.

You were not ready like him. Not ready to leap forth into another unknowing relationship with a man. He was the right person, but now was definitely not the right time.

Silently he lets your wrist go as you hurry inside your apartment. Slamming the door you rest your back against it trying to control your breathing. The look on Jaebeom’s face was hurt. You had hurt him. Regret crawled its way up your chest making you feel absolutely nauseous for the way you handled speaking with him. The man had confessed to you for fucks sake. And you have the audacity to get upset with this complete stranger and hurt him just because you were embarrassed?

This was a new low of yours.

#got7 fanfic #got7 jb #got7 smut #got7 scenarios #jaebeom fanfic #jb fanfic #fanfic #Smut #jaebeom smut #jb smut

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iknowicanbutwhy · 4 years ago

Text

Heads up we got an

Adult Hikikomori Sunny AU

I've been waiting to find an AU after the neutral end of the Hikikomori route for a while. What happened to Sunny? How did his life go on after that? Did he go to college? Did he get a fulltime job? Did he figure out what he wants in life?

these are all very good questions because literally anything could be the case. So this AU is just gonna be stuck in a hospital setting for a while.

Here's what I got so far:

Past:

Hospital Psychiatrist (practicing? Training?) Doctor Hero

I imagine after Basil's death, Hero would (eventually) turn to learning how to identify and help people with suicidal tendencies, if he's gonna be a doctor anyway.

In a choice between psychologist and psychiatrist, Hero went psychiatrist. Hero's parents would pressure him into getting a more lucrative job. PLUS psychiatrists go to college for 8 years, then take four more of psychiatry residency. Hero might feel just a little more accomplished, just a little better about himself for earning a higher degree, just to reassure himself that he's working hard and doing his best towards helping people.

Hero did extra studying in psychotherapy. He tried doing it at the same time as he did medical college. He's not.. the best at it because of that, for several reasons, but he knows it's better to combine medicine and conversation. When he has his head on straight, he can manage it.

I have.. no idea whether to put Hero into practice or residency. He'd have to be at least around.. 31, if he were in practice. That's a long time to have unresolved trauma. That's a nice hunk of research i gotta do.

That's it that's all for Hero. His goals are set in the present and focused around other people, as per usual.

Sunny is... not doing so well. He lied about going to college when he moved into some hole far away from his mother. He has no reason to get up in the morning when he can just lie around. He doesn't enjoy whatever hobbies he used to have.

He doesn't even know Basil is gone and he's so bad off.

He's honestly convinced himself that he doesn't care about anything. He still cares about people, however. He'd have stayed with his mom and burdened her with himself if he didn't. When they had moved from Faraway, it was to a cheaper, smaller place. That meant Sunny's mom didn't have to work so much. That meant more time with Sunny. He decided it was.. preferable not to stay.

The only times he does anything is when he tries to remember the past and relearn the person he used to be. What did he do? What did he like? He'd play games, and read comics, and would get frustrated? move on to something else when those did nothing for him, searching for.. some feeling to occur. And then he'd question why, why, why.

Why can't he enjoy anything? Why does he want to feel enjoyment? Why can't he just do something and be happy? Why can't he just do nothing and be fine? Why does he need to exist? Why does he want to move? Why does he want, but can never have, can never get by himself?

If there's nothing he can do, then what is he waiting for?

Vague memories would become clearer with introspection, until he would feel something, finally. An old guilt aching from deep inside his bones. A haunting self hatred, ripping away whatever minuscule strength his limbs had to try anything fun. A sense of iron resignation blanketing and anchoring his body, reminding him that it's much too late to try getting up now. Ironically, apathy got him up in the morning, as much as it keeps him from enjoying anything enough to stay up.

He was always a little too thin, but he used to force himself to do things like eat and work enough to survive. Mostly because to sleep means to not have headaches, and to not have headaches means to eat well enough, and to eat well enough means to have food, and to have food means to have money from a job.

But it's not as if he was all too desperate to sleep, anyway. His dreams have stayed the same for years. They're more eventful and colorful than bland reality, but it's a mix of the same thing every day. Staring at the swirling kaleidoscope of his dreams is exactly like observing the same beige ceiling for hours on end, until it all mixes together into the same shade of empty grey.

It probably doesn't help Sunny's mood that he thinks dramatic things like the previous point, just to pass time.

He only got worse once he was forced to move into one of those really bad apartments. You know the ones, with the rusted metal stairs nobody wants to risk their life on, and practically no privacy with four-to-five thin-walled neighboring rooms, and bad heating in one corner of the apartment. But it was cheap. Too bad he had to go up and down the stairs all the time.

He didn't have a problem with them when he just moved in. Generally, the most he notices is starting at the top, teleporting to the bottom, and a slight shaking of his hands that he barely glances at with empty curiosity.

As it is, some part of him knew this was going to happen. That he'd have one of those terribly introspective weeks, when he just so happens to have his new job with a boss ready to fire him and his sullen face and poor (somehow complete neutrality is offensive) attitude. He's emotionally vulnerable, and the memories on top of the stairs are devastating.

A week goes by. He's fired. He doesn't look for another job. He hasn't gone for groceries in a while. He's exhausted.

He was waiting for death, he guesses. He still wants, still feels that urge in the buzzing of his fingertips, the ghost of movement from his limbs, the phantom shiver in his back - the intent of every muscle in his body one after the other pleading with him to move, but never all at once - and Sunny laments that the human body is pretty stupid. Moving wont help. What would he do, make the end come quicker? He's already thrown away too many chances for that.

He'll stop wanting once he's gone. That's what happens when you get what you want, right?

His landlord finds him. He forgot the rent. He's taken to the hospital. Ugh.

Present:

Sunny is stunted and underweight. He wears baggy shirts stuffed into slightly less baggy hoodies, and sweats. Warmth. He couldn't find his hoodie after they took it off to put in an IV on his first trip to the hospital.

Usually nurses do things like bring food to patients, but Sunny only ever interacts with Hero and Hero wants to make sure Sunny is okay anyway. Not that it's much easier for Hero to encourage Sunny to eat.

Sunny stresses Hero the hell out. But Hero kinda missed Sunny, and his depressing and concerning reappearance brings with it a deadpan, world-weary, often childish humor that fails to take anything seriously when everything in Sunny's situation should be taken seriously. It's as much a relief as it is incredibly frustrating. Some days Hero loves it. Some days it makes him angry. Some days it makes him want to cry.

I tried doing research into the conduct Hero should display regarding patients/clients in general but it just. Any professionalism quickly devolves between him and Sunny.

As in, at one point, him and Sunny were whaling on each other about having no lives. Hero felt really bad afterwards; he had no idea what came over him. It was a great way for both of them to let out some hidden frustration, though, and they turned out fine afterwards. They even lowkey pick on each other every now and again.

Sometimes one or the other gets a bit too accurate in their teasing, however.

Psychiatrists are supposed to be able to understand, diagnose, and treat mental, emotional and behavioral disorders. So, if Hero were a completely capable psychiatrist, which he is, he wouldn't break down in front of his client. But Hero's late teenage years are wrought with so much grief and trauma, so to see Sunny and not just another client in this state is.. something i imagine he'd break down about eventually. There's also the fact that Sunny is mostly closed off to any help, which only makes things harder.

Hero is trying his best, but after years of never understanding why Mari died, years of thinking and wondering and second-guessing himself, years of guilt after never visiting Basil before he died, years of doing what he was told was "best" yet failing in what's most important to him (his friends) - his best never feels good enough around Sunny. It feels too little, too late. For this reason, and possibly because even if Hero were able to keep himself together he may just not be the right psychiatrist for Sunny, it would be better for him to find another psychiatrist for Sunny. He won't, though.

Hero really needs some time to himself to just think, or perhaps he needs someone else to talk to. Kel is nice, but Aubrey would have better experience handling emotions.

I have a very limited idea of what Aubrey and Kel are doing. Aubrey is a childcare instructor to parents and works in child services. She has studied child psychology. She has studied how childhood affects adulthood. Kel's off trying to make a name in basketball while giving kids high fives and heartfelt support.

Hero, in fact, does not like to be called Dr. Hero, but his shyness (feeling of unworthiness) about it only endears everyone to call him that more. He tells the kids that everyone calls him Hero, but the adults merely find out from the other doctors and nurses. Hero tried introducing himself as Henry to the other doctors, but Kel told them his nickname, and it stuck for obvious reasons.

Sometimes, on days when Hero has to wear his lab coat, he ties it around his neck like a cape. The kids like it, say it makes him look like a superHero.

Hero doesn't really cook. His schedule is always too busy to make anything that isn't quick. But he does eventually figure out that cooking for Sunny is the best way to entice him to eat, so when he makes something, he makes enough for both of them. They eat together.

Hero had to gather Sunny's change of clothes from his apartment when he found out that the reason Sunny has been in the same clothes for the last week is because he's had no one to visit him. Not even his mother. Why?

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simpingforsoftboys · 4 years ago

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Y/N and the Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad Day

ft. OikAka (Oikawa x Akaashi)

!GN Reader!

Thanks so much for the request anon! Ngl I've never considered this ship but it kinda makes a lot of sense? Like damn they'd be so cute together- and with the reader? Woo! Love it! Going to go for hurt/comfort in this one!

Also yes, the title is based on that one kids book.

Today had been a pretty terrible day for you. Your boss was in a bad mood- meaning she had been increasingly rude to you throughout the day, the office's wifi cut out while you were finishing up the report you had worked tirelessly on for the past week, and you had accidentally dropped your phone in a puddle- screen down- effectively cracking the screen and rendering it unusable (since the insides got wet too). Needless to say, it was quite possibly the worst day you've ever experienced. It took absolutely every ounce of strength to prevent yourself from bursting into tears in the street. There was nothing you wanted to do besides break down and eat a tub of ice cream- actually, being comforted by your lovers would be a good alternative. The only good thing that had happened so far was getting to go home early- since your boss was not in a working mindset and instead decided to go get drunk, a little after noon. It's not really a good thing actually, just means you'll have more work to do the day after tomorrow.

Crying sounded really good right now.

Fifteen minutes later you got off the bus and walked into your apartment complex. The elevator ride to the fifteenth floor was devoid of any other residents. Alone in your misery, you allowed your bottom lip to wobble.

The elevator dings- signaling that you've arrived on your floor.

You step out of the lift and into the hall. The walk to your front door is just as long as usual but somehow feels as though it took an eternity. Seems like your bad fortune followed you home- since the house key breaks, leaving the bottom half in the lock itself.

You're locked outside.

Again, it's a struggle to hold back the tears.

Keiji and Toru wouldn't be home at the moment, since the both of them were out on a date. (There's nothing wrong with that- it's just as important to have one on one dates as it is to have dates with the three of you. You also have plenty of dates with just Toru or Keiji by themselves.) Looks like you'll have to call your landlord... oh wait your phone is broken... and you forgot that he's on his yearly vacation in Seoul at the moment.

Maybe one of your neighbors will let you use their phone to call one of your partners! Nodding to yourself, you get up and knock on Rina-san's door. She's not home. Swallowing your mild frustration, you move along the hall to the next door. Kento-san's not home either. This pattern continues for the next few doors- eventually you just give up. The other apartments are vacant after all, still under renovation.

You return back to your apartment's door and slide down to the ground- back to the wood. Lips quivering, frustration evident, you bow your head and let the tears fall. There's no other noise in the hallway aside from your quiet sobs.

Today was just the worst.

Did you accidentally upset the universe somehow? Or maybe you said something disrespectful and some culture's god was angry at you.

Tears still streaming from your tear ducts, you let your head softly slam back against the door. There's so many things you're feeling right now. Sadness- because you really wanted to have a good day and now that you can't have that you want to be comforted, resentment- at the world, at yourself, at everyone. It wasn't fair- and by that you mean everything- every single, little thing was unfair. Anger- because damnit what else could you be feeling right now? The situation was beyond your control- anyone would feel angry in your shoes. It's hard to fathom that somewhere in the world, someone was suffering worse than you were at the moment.

You didn't care about them.

All you were focused on was how you were feeling.

Thinking that way suddenly made you feel very self conscious.

Maybe there was a reason for the day going like this.

A humbling experience perhaps?

That thought had you seriously wondering if you had actually done something unfathomably terrible... but your memory came up blank.

The lift dinged.

You had to force yourself to look in the direction of the noise.

The overhead lighting seemed almost heavenly- surrounding your saviors in an unearthly way and appearing to give them halos.

Why did they look so shocked to see you?

Isn’t that what they’re here to do?

Save you from your plight?

“Y/n darling, what are you doing here on the ground?” Keiji asks, beating Toru by a millisecond and running over to your side- pulling you into his comforting embrace. His hold makes you feel safe, likening him to the firm, concrete walls of strongholds. Yes, Keiji feels secure, strong, and upright. You just know that you can collapse against him and he won’t waver.

Looks like your tears aren’t dried out yet, because you let out a choked sob, dripping snot and all- burying your face into his neck.

“Shh, it’s alright baby- me and Keiji have you.” Toru says softly, finally coming to your side and wrapping his long arms around the two of you. His hug feels different. It’s like lava- but not quite so. He could burn you- but he chooses to use his heat to bring you comfort instead- only burning those he deems a threat to what he calls his. He’s flexible but will give it all up at a moments notice- trading that mobility for statuesque stillness- letting himself cool, despite his better judgement, in order to become a tall, rock wall capable of protecting you and Keiji.

You’re warm and you’re safe.

They construct walls around you.

So you let your own walls fall, trusting them to protect you when you’re at your most vulnerable.

“I-I had a really bad d-day.” You whimper into the ravenette’s milky skin. He can feel the hot tears against the column of his neck but chooses not to say anything- instead he holds you tighter. “My boss w-was in a s-shitty mood, I couldn’t f-finish my report in time c-cause the wifi cut out. My p-phone broke- and my k-key did too-” Overwhelmed once again, you cut yourself off and fall back into silence, sniffling quietly.

“I’m sorry Y/n, you shouldn’t have had to go through all of that.” Keiji says- and you can hear the sincerity in his tone. You bask in his company for a long while, trying to pretend that time stopped- just for the three of you.

“I need to get the key out okay? Then we can go take a nice bath inside, how’s that sound?” Keiji whispers softly, not wanting to upset you but also wanting you to understand the benefit of letting him go. You’re tempted to say no- wanting to just enjoy his touch, but your rational side tells you that you’ll get all the cuddles you want once you’re in the apartment.

“O-okay... sounds good.” You move to cling to Toru, while Akaashi begins removing some bobby pins he has hidden in his hair and gets to work.

“Hey babe.” Your brunette lover murmurs, turning your chin up to gaze into his eyes. “You’re wheezing so much, am I really that breathtaking?” The two of you stare at each other- personally you don’t know if you want to laugh at his horrible attempt at humor or if you want to cry. So you settle on slapping the back of his head.

“Not the time ‘ru.” You scold, but there’s an undeniable smile on your face.

“Ouch... okay okay I’m sorry!” He apologizes, rubbing the back of his head. “I just hate seeing you so sad.”

“I know ‘ru... thank you.” Toru lets out an acknowledging hum and you can feel the way his heart beat increases ever so slightly. He’s so warm- his fiery love practically oozing out of his being. You love him so much.

A few minutes later, Keiji manages to get the broken part of the key out of the lock and the three of you can finally go home. He’s always been so clever- and you’re reminded again, why you love him.

The three of you head inside...

You take a relaxing shower (since all three of you can’t fit in the small bathtub), then cuddle up together on your king sized bed, tubs of ice cream in hand and candles lit to set the mood. Your favorite comfort show is streaming from the television, both the loves of your life sandwiching you between them, and you realize just how fortunate you are.

You’ll take as many bad days as necessary- so long as you get to come home to this.

Maybe, the universe was fair to some after all.

Just maybe- you could consider yourself one of the lucky ones.

I hope this was what you were looking for and more! It’s a little on the shorter side but I’m pretty proud of how it turned out!

#akaashi keiji x reader #akaashi x gender neutral reader #akaashi x reader #oikawa toru x reader #oikawa x reader #oikawa tooru x reader #oikawa tooru x y/n #oikawa tooru x you #akaashi keiji x you #akaashi keiji x y/n #answered.requests #akaashi x reader x oikawa

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thosch3i · 4 years ago

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The finale of Ultimate Note airs 12/9 (tonight in China) for VIP. Thank you to this drama for bringing me my favorite Iron Triangle ❤ Longer discussion of why I love it so much, and why I strongly recommend it to book fans (especially those upset with certain previous adaptations) below the cut, apologies if it’s not fully coherent at times because I haven’t slept enough and also it’s almost 1am. But your TLDR is basically: characterization, plot, pacing, relationships are the best of any DMBJ drama. Iron Triangle especially.

First, the pacing of this show is excellent. Pretty much all cdramas I’ve seen or heard of have been inundated with filler, and the previous DMBJ dramas fall victim to this as well. Ultimate Note took 36 episodes to cover 4 book arcs, whereas previous adaptations have taken more episodes to cover far fewer. There’s really not any content you’d be wanting to skip, as almost all of it is plot-relevant or character-relevant.

Second, the plot is the most cohesive out of any DMBJ adaptation. Frankly, this isn’t saying too much, given the novel plot can also be confusing as all hell sometimes, but Ultimate Note goes above and beyond in pulling in information from later books and, if I heard correctly, common fan theories, doing their best to fill in the plot holes left by the author to create a more complete story.

Third, the female characters are actually done well. (As well as they can be, given the source material’s unfortunate habit of fridging its women.) For example, A-Ning’s decision to go the Tamutuo wasn’t because she was ~in love~ with some man. She is a determined individual who has made her choice about her path a long time ago, and she is willing to risk death to achieve her goals. Even her death was done about as well as it could have been--it wasn’t drawn out to the point of it being sickeningly cheesy, and Wu Xie tried his best to honor her goals and bring her to the Palace of the Queen Mother of the West (even emphasizing to Pangzi, “if you died, I would carry you too”). In addition, Chen Wenjin wasn’t stuck in some ridiculous love triangle. She loved Wu Sanxing, of course, but her loving a man isn’t made out to be her entire personality. Her goodbye to Xie Lianhuan is poignant but not mushy. She’s steady and sure in her goals, and she knows what she has to do in order to save herself. Yuncai’s character, as well, I think was handled about as well as it could’ve been given the source material. Her relationship with Pangzi wasn’t overexaggerated and nauseating, and I think their relationship was more tolerable in the drama than it was in the novel overall. (In addition, I prefer how they handled her death in the drama versus the novel--instead of just killing her offscreen, they give her a redemption, and show how she’d grown attached to her new friends, Pangzi especially, resulting in her hesitation to deal the final blow.)

Related to the above point: no added forced romances that destroyed the female characters’ personalities and reduced them to just love interests for men, thank god. Pangzi and Yuncai’s relationship was already there in the novel, but nothing about their relationship was distorted in the drama to the point of being annoying, and Yuncai is shown to have her own goals for cozying up to Pangzi (at first, at least). If you want to get technical about “added romances”, you could honestly argue that it’s Pingxie. (And Hei///hua, but I’ll be honest and say they’re not my cup of tea, so I won’t really be discussing them. However, I do think their characters, while also exaggerated for humor at points, were also done well, and their relationship--while AFAIK was not a really a thing in the books at all?--was written in a way that the development made sense, and their personalities compatible.)

But anyway, while Ultimate Note does make Pingxie seem closer to each other than they were in the novel, we do have to remember that the novel is from Wu Xie’s point of view, and he’s a little bit of a blockhead when it comes to noticing how much Xiaoge cares about him. (IIRC, he wonders if Xiaoge even considers him a friend in Zang Hai Hua...after Xiaoge’s literally called him his “only connection” to this world in book 8.) However, from an outsider POV, it’d be natural for us to see Xiaoge worrying more over Wu Xie. Because from Wu Xie’s perspective, what did he actually see? Xiaoge dropping in to save him a few times and often vanishing or turning away right after, leaving Wu Xie with mixed feelings and confusion about his value to Xiaoge. Xiaoge being aloof before they set off to Tamutuo, claiming that he is a person with no past and future, and that no one would remember him if he disappeared. (Xiaoge smiles before telling Wu Xie that he’s on Wu Xie’s side--that’s a smile that the viewers see, but that Wu Xie doesn’t.) Most of Xiaoge’s visible worry for Wu Xie in the desert was also when Wu Xie himself was not there to see it. During the scene where the fungus was growing in Wu Xie’s stomach, he was entirely out of it while Xiaoge visibly panicked about hurting him, and after the fungus was dealt with, Xiaoge only stood off to the side--only to smile faintly to himself, relieved, after Wu Xie wakes up. (Again a smile that the viewers see, but that Wu Xie doesn’t.) But because from an outsider POV we can see all this, while Wu Xie remains partly ignorant, lines like “thankfully, I didn’t bring death upon you” and Xiaoge calling Wu Xie is only connection to the world seem that much more logical, now that we can see some of the depth and development of how much Xiaoge does care about Wu Xie.

That brings me to the primary reason why I love Ultimate Note, because the main selling point for me on any franchise is not actually world-building or plot, but rather the characters and the relationships between those characters. And for DMBJ, the relationship I’m always looking for--and the relationship that the entire franchise ultimately centers around--is the Iron Triangle. And the mutual trust and the strength of the bond between this Iron Triangle is unmistakable; no one is treated as expendable.

As much as we have joked about Xiaoge's double standards with Wu Xie versus Pangzi, the end of the Banai arc especially and the last five episodes have cemented the importance of Xiaoge and Pangzi's friendship. Their relationship is often the weakest leg of the Iron Triangle in DMBJ adaptations, but Ultimate Note has nailed it. Pangzi helps carry Xiaoge out of Tamutuo, and Pangzi's the one who primarily takes care of Xiaoge after he loses his memories. There's also Xiaoge's clear worry over Pangzi after Yuncai's death, and his assurance that Pangzi won't die as long as he is here in the later episodes when the two of them are separated from Wu Xie--showing that the Iron Triangle is a triangle; Wu Xie isn't the single connection that Xiaoge and Pangzi's relationship hinges upon.

Pangzi and Wu Xie's friendship doesn't need much explaining: the two of them bicker like they're brothers, and they could probably star in their own buddy-cop comedy together. Both Pangzi and Xiaoge are shown to be clearly worried for Wu Xie after the Xie Lianhuan reveal, and even though neither of them quite know how to handle it, they are there for Wu Xie. And of course, there's the scene where Pangzi pours out the water while they're waiting for Xiaoge to leave the meteorite. Wu Xie cries for Pangzi when they're in the Miluotuo cave and he chooses to carry out Xiaoge first, and once again, his worry for Pangzi after Yuncai's death is palpable. Even when Wu Xie has to leave Pangzi in Banai, he instructs Xiaoge to look after him (not that Xiaoge really needed the instruction, anyway--that’s his best friend, too).

Wu Xie and Xiaoge's relationship needs even less explaining: anyone who's watched the show can attest to how much they care about each other. From Wu Xie's frantic scrambling to grab the tapes upon hearing they were from "Zhang Qiling" and Xiaoge's introduction in the show being him stopping outside Wushanju to stare up (longingly?) at the sign, we see their relationship unfold in all of its quiet pining and lingering looks. When Xiaoge claims no one would know if he disappeared from this world, Wu Xie doesn't hesitate in promising that he, at least, will. Xiaoge smiles before telling Wu Xie that he's on his side, and Wu Xie vows to walk with Xiaoge until the very end. During the entire Tamutuo trip, Xiaoge is visibly worried for Wu Xie--when the parasitic fungus grew in his stomach, that worry was the most clear. But Wu Xie worries for Xiaoge too: insisting on going to save Xiaoge from the snakes that night when they all went blind; swearing that even if he faces death, he would wait for Xiaoge to leave the meteorite; telling Xiaoge that he will take him home. (Related: the soft, almost vulnerable way Xiaoge tells Wu Xie “take me home” in episode 31.) Not to mention--even when Xiaoge loses his memories, he still remembers Wu Xie. (And Pangzi smiles knowingly right after that scene.)

There are too many character/relationship moments I could write about, but one that stuck out in particular was when they were facing the spiders, and Wu Xie stopped Xiaoge from cutting his hand and using his blood to make the spiders retreat. At this point, Wu Xie and Pangzi don't know the extent of how Xiaoge was (mis)treated as a child (and used as a blood bag, apparently), but they know about how "A-Kun" was captured used as bait. Wu Xie and Pangzi would never ask Xiaoge to bleed for them, no matter what. Not now, let alone 10+ years later. (I won't name names, but if you know what I'm talking about, then you know.)

Which brings me to my main point: the characters in Ultimate Note are the closest to their novel selves I have ever seen in a DMBJ adaptation, and this is objectively the best adaptation of the DMBJ novel. (Whether you prefer another adaption or not is your opinion--I absolutely love the Time Raiders movie, even though that plot is literally all over the place, and Xiaoge is decently OOC--but Ultimate Note is the best adaptation of the novel, and the characters are the most true to what they actually should be.)

You can see the innocent and naïve Wu Xie, but you can also see the developing confusion, frustration, and anger he feels because he's been lead around by his nose his entire life. And he is angry in the novel; he is a bit of a hot-headed bastard; he's not just a naïve child. I remember seeing some complaints that Wu Xie felt "OOC" in the first episode for being so furious with his San-shu, but I think his reactions were spot-on with how he felt, and how he wanted to react. A similar point is the scene where Wu Xie slammed Xiaoge against the car--aside from just being some fun fanservice, in the novel Wu Xie really was furious at Xiaoge for vanishing on him and never contacting him after leaving the Heavenly Palace in the Clouds. A lot of the novel is Wu Xie's inner thoughts, which are difficult to portray in a live action adaptation, but he really did pretty much want to pick a fight with Xiaoge about disappearing, and Ultimate Note decided on how to express this frustration in a way that suits a drama adaptation. In addition, you can see how Wu Xie’s past experiences like the trip to Tamutuo has changed him in how he manipulates Panma into bringing him to the lake; and you can see how almost losing Xiaoge and Pangzi to the Miluotuo changed him as well, when he thinks he’s lost them for real in episode 36 (leading up to his decision to put on his San-shu’s mask by the end, despite the fact that “some masks, when worn too long, can no longer be taken off”).

As for Pangzi: even though he has scenes that were clearly exaggerated for comic relief, he has plenty of moments that build his character and the Iron Triangle’s bond. These include him pouring out the water while he and Wu Xie are waiting for Xiaoge, his grief over Yuncai’s death, his standing by Wu Xie during the hotel auction scene, and his almost mother-hen-like worry about Xiaoge while they’re entering the Zhang Family Mansion in the last five episodes. Not to mention, he’s really quite a smart and perceptive character, despite his goofiness: he sees through Xiaoge’s worry about Wu Xie, and he knows when to step in and liven the atmosphere (see: Wu Xie being all awkward about his gift to Xiaoge in episode 31, and Pangzi being there practically just for emotional support). Also in episode 31: Pangzi telling Xiaoge that he’s getting more and more humane (the implications about Wu Xie here are pretty obvious). All in all, Pangzi is a funny person; he is often comic relief, but he’s also a steadfastly loyal friend and someone who loves deeply and without regret. Initially we saw more of his humor, but we definitely got the depths to his character by the end of Ultimate Note.

Finally Xiaoge, who I’m discussing last because he’s my favorite character: for once, I can see the humanity behind the title “Zhang Qiling”, and in a way that isn’t OOC. Xiaoge isn’t treated as a free source of bug-repelling blood; he isn’t treated as some overpowered, untouchable idol; he isn’t treated as a rescue machine for whenever another character needs it. He is a human, not a god. For the rest, I think his actor’s words speak for themselves. (And now I really don’t trust anyone else except him with Xiaoge's character.)

Ultimate Note succeeded in capturing the nuances of its main characters: Wu Xie’s loss of his “tianzhen” and slow maturation to the man he will eventually become by Sha Hai; Pangzi’s outwardly humorous pseudo-caricature but inwardly deeply loyal and loving spirit; Xiaoge’s vulnerabilities, painful humanity, and the “heart” given to him by his mother, hidden beneath a seemingly impenetrable armor. This is an Iron Triangle that feels like the Iron Triangle, without needing say so much in words. This is an Iron Triangle with mutual respect and a friendship I can see and believe in.

In conclusion: Ultimate Note does the story justice; it does the characters justice; it does the relationships justice; and it did all this with a low budget and almost no promotion. You can tell the crew definitely cares about the source material.

My only complaint is that they couldn’t film the finale.

Rambling over! All my love to the Ultimate Note cast and crew <3

#dmbj #zjbj #ultimate note #pingxie #iron triangle #盗墓笔记 #终极笔记 #瓶邪 #the lost tomb 3 #shouting into the void #i was supposed to be writing my essay for grad school LMAO #got 2.5k words of whatever the hell this is instead #basically iron triangle superior is what im saying #this is the longer and slightly more grammatical version of what i posted on twitter a couple days ago #FUCK I FORGOT TO TALK ABOUT PAN ZI #you know what its 1am im not editing this now lol

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zhoneycutt · 3 years ago

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General

Character’s full name: Milktea Truestar

Reason or meaning of name: Renamed himself after his favorite drink

Character’s nickname: Tea or Star

Reason for nickname: Just to shorten his names

Race: Black and half-orc

Pronouns: He/Him

Sexuality: Unlabeled

Gender: Unlabeled

ENFP

Powers/Abilities?: Naturally very strong due to being an orc, also learned some healing magic

Mental illness?: Anxiety

Physical appearance

Age: 23 (in human years

Height: 6'6-7

Body build: Toned

Eye color: Redish brown

Skin tone:

Predominant features: Glow-y skin, thick eyelashes, two tusks in his bottom row of teeth

Hair color: dark brown

Type of hair: 3b-3c

Hairstyle: down his back, usually just has it out, but will put it in a ponytail or bun(s)

Overall attractiveness: usually seen as very good looking

Usual fashion of dress: Loves anything really (except jeans) he just likes to accessorize

Favorite outfit(s):

Jewelry or accessories: lots of necklaces and bracelets, wears a necklace he got from his best friend when they were kids

Personality

Good personality traits: Outgoing, caring, protective, confident, creative, optimistic, honest, friendly, open-minded

Bad personality traits: indecisive, impulsive, forgetful, needy, nosy, scatterbrained, fidgety

Mood character is most often in: Always wants to talk to and meet new people, very cheerful. However if something upsets him, he can get angry pretty fast

Sense of humor: Can be dirty, but usually just random quips that have to do with the conversation

Character’s greatest joy in life: his friends and family

Character’s greatest fear: people forgetting him, killing someone in anger

Why?: He finds comfort in being around others, especially people he cares for and care for him. And being angry scares him, he knows he is very capable of hurting someone badly when he's not angry, so it scares him that he's able to take another life with his own hands.

Character is most at ease when: He's around his friends

Most ill at ease when: he's by himself for long periods of time, when others seem scared of him

Enraged when: he sees others being treated poorly

Priorities: Others come before himself

Life philosophy: "Be the reason someone smiles"

If granted one wish, it would be: Would definitely try to wish for more wishes. If that didn't work, he would wish for his dad to be alive

Why?: His dad was human, so he watched him grow old and die, he loved his dad a lot

Character’s soft spot: any animals and people giving him free food

Is this soft spot obvious to others?: absolutely

Greatest strength: his ability to make friends in any situations

Greatest vulnerability or weakness: his fear of being alone or forgotten

Biggest regret: Not leaving his ex sooner

Minor regret: Not listening to his mom when she tells him to bring an umbrella

Biggest accomplishment: Building his confidence

Minor accomplishment: learned to make his best friend's favorite dessert (chocolate filled croissants)

Character’s darkest secret: There were times when he was younger where he would be blinded by rage and in one incident, he almost killed someone

Does anyone else know?: His best friend, and his parents

Goals

Drives and motivations: Making his parents proud, making up for his past

Immediate goals: Making as many good friends as he can

Long term goals: living life to the fullest

How the character plans to accomplish these goals: By making friends with a lot of people, and not passing up any 'adventure' there may be

How other characters will be affected: Most likely dragged along with him into his 'adventures'

Past

Type of childhood: Very loving parents, went outside pretty much everyday

Most important childhood memory: Meeting his best friend. Almost killing someone.

Why: he had a much different life than him, and they fed off of each other (personalities, knowledge, etc.). He was never really aware of just how strong he was until he almost killed a peer of his.

Dream job: Doesn't dream of work, but he wouldn't mind being a baker

Finances: Middle class

Family

Mother: Alive

Relationship with her: very loving!! She always supports him through what he wants to do

Father: Deceased

Relationship with him: He taught him everything he knows about nature and animals

Favorites

Color: Pink or light green

Least favorite color: Orange

Music: Anything that sounds good

Food: peppermint patties

Literature: anything having to do with plants and animals

Form of entertainment: Being around others

Mode of transportation: walking

Most prized possession: Father's journal

Habits

Hobbies: baking, dancing, gardening, construction or just fixing up things

Plays a sport?: Doesn't like sports all that much

How he/she would spend a rainy day: Listening to the rain and taking a nap or laying in the rain

Spending habits: usually good at saving money, may splurge here and there

Smokes: no

Drinks: yeah

Other drugs: weed sometimes

What does he do too much of?: Talking

What does he do too little of?: taking breaks

Extremely skilled at: Making connections with people, crushing objects with his bare hands

Extremely unskilled at: sports

Nervous tics: tapping on surfaces

Usual body posture: very good!! stands and sits straight, unless he's really comfortable on a couch or something

Mannerisms: wrapping his hair around his index finger when he's bored, claps when he's excited, usually talks loudly. He is very polite though and has good manners!! He does tend to randomly hug people (he's a very touchy person, hugs, holding hands, high fives, etc.)

Peculiarities: always moving, walks fast, doesn't really like jeans, usually wears skirts, sweatpants, or dress-pants, the way his mood can change so quickly

Traits

Optimist or pessimist?

Introvert or extrovert?

Daredevil or cautious?

Logical or emotional?

Disorderly and messy or methodical and neat?

Prefers working or relaxing?

Confident or unsure of himself?

Animal lover? absolutely

Self-perception

How he feels about himself: He's very confident in almost everything he does

One word the character would use to describe self: Outgoing

What does the character consider his/her best personality trait?: Ability to talk to people

What does the character consider his worst personality trait? : fear of being alone

What does the character consider his best physical characteristic?: His smile

What does the character consider his worst physical characteristic?: Doesn't think he has one

How does the character think others perceive him: Hopefully as a very caring and friendly person

What would the character most like to change about himself: Not being able to read a room.

Relationships with others

Opinion of other people in general: Loves people

Does the character hide his/her true opinions and emotions from others?: Nah

Best friend(s): Pandora

v doesn't have such large tusks, in his new design they are smaller v

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