#seriously though that got so meta

[kekithepancake25]

AGHHH I ALMOST FORGOT ABOUT THE GAY BOIS 4TH ANNIVERSARY

here you go, I paid my tributes to the king and his knight :D

fun fact: I only have a dedede plushie because I have a meta knight plushie

also for some reason this picture turned out much better than I thought it would

yxoyosyizkzkxgkkzygxxylssyxkylx

[twig-tea]

Love For Love's Sake Marketing vs Reality

I cannot get over how misleading the description of this show was compared to its actual execution of the first two episodes. This will be pretty spoiler-free if you are reading to decide whether to give the show a try!

The summary: "Twenty-nine-year-old Tae Myung Ha experiences a bewildering twist of fate when suddenly finds himself transported into a fictional online game where he inhabits the body of a ninteen-year-old character. Soon, Tae Myung Ha embarks on a quest within the virtual world to bring happiness to a character named Cha Yeo Woon. Despite his humble upbringing, Cha Yeo Woon has managed to excel in the national track and field championships, maintaining a remarkable reputation among his peers due to his handsome looks and athletic physique."

What I had taken away from that description that had made me wary: The importance of the age gap; lying to a character to fake affection in order to win a game.

None of the original description is a lie, but the emphasis is all wrong and it excludes some key details that make this show so good.

First: The character MyungHa is tasked to make happy is not just any character; he's the character in a novel MyungHa has just read, and he's the character that he says he identified with most (and who he was rooting for and was annnoyed got a sad storyline and ending). So when he's going up to YeoWoon expressing affection, it's genuine. He really does already know and like this guy. That's a HUGE difference for me, and it changes his mission from a Big Lie into a personal mission. The thing I like most about this show is the heart. The fact that MyungHa genuinely wanting YeoWoon to be happy is (it seems) the triggering event that transports him into the game, not a bewildering twist of fate but a direct response to his articulated wish, is a key part of that heart!

Second: Myung Ha is not out here as a 19-year-old trying to seduce YeoWoon, he wants him to be happy because he sees in YeoWoon similarities to who he was in his teens. The thing that has MyungHa most excited about being 19 again is his grandmother still being alive. The age gap is only a thing in how MyungHa is treating YeoWoon like he's a little kid, which annoys the hell out of YeoWoon because his character is only 1 year older.

Finally: YeoWoon has no friends. It seems true that he's famous on campus and that he has fans (e.g. KyungHoon's sister) but they don't approach him and it doesn't prevent people from hating him. This description makes him sound like a popular guy.

The description on MDL also includes this paragraph: "Cheon Sang Won hails from an affluent family and becomes emotionally entangled with Tae Myung Ha. His involvement adds complexity to the developing relationship between Tae Myung Ha and Cha Yeo Woon. Ahn Kyung Hoon, introverted and reserved, supports and assists Tae Myung Ha on his mission within the virtual world."

We haven't enough of SangWon to draw conclusions yet, but based on the failures of the original description to capture any of the the things I love about the show while highlighting issues that don't (to date) actually exist in the show, I'm going to reserve judgment and assume this is also misleading. It would be pretty antithetical to the very heart of the show that's being set up if Myung Ha, through his actions, caused a different character (SangWon) to become the sad second lead. I'll be really interested to see how this goes and how/if this show will address this issue.

TL;DR: The marketing material: Age gap romance with a Big Lie The actual show: video game isekai granting an earnest protagonist a chance to create a fix-it AU for his favourite sad side character.

Anyway. Glad the show turned out to be so off from the marketing material because this is way better!

[cienie-isengardu]

Jango Fett' childhood on Concord Dawn

One of the things that I think bothers me the most about Jango Fett: Open Seasons comics series is how a 8 (or 10) years old Jango was told by his dad to repair a harvester

and then… left alone for who knows how long in the middle of a crop field?

I was born in the city so obviously I don’t know how life on a farm goes and all so forgive me my ignorance but:

A) Jango was introduced with a weapon in his hand, while he walked through his own family’s property

and was taught by father how to use a blaster at the age of 8 - 10.

At this point in the story, I think it is safe to assume Jango’s dad knew Mandalorians were in his field, as he brought food to Jaster and his men. So I assume he was contacted by comlink or he already talked in person with Jaster and he probably had some idea of what was going on - unless Jaster didn’t warn him about Death Watch on his trail, but I think this is pretty unlikely, as the Mandalorians stayed hidden in the field, instead of coming to Fett’s house.  

So there is a reason to think that leaving a kid alone in the middle of the field was not the smartest idea.

B) Jango has never been any technology genius or even that good with it in sources? His jetpack was repaired by a droid whose main job was to take care of little Boba on Kamino. I’m pretty sure Jango as a Mandalorian Merc was capable of maintaining his armor, weapons and ship but if the harvester was so important to put back into use - and I assume this is the case, as Fett’s parents were usually described as simple farmers and the first part of comics clearly represents the season of summer (childhood) and this was very likely grain harvest time  - then I would not pick a kid to do the job, unless the kid was Anakin Skywalker who could fix all kind of machinery, as it was his specific gift. Jango though? I’m not so sure about his 8-10 year old self’ skills.

Of course, the harvester’s problem could be a simple matter but then why not send Arla, Jango’s older sister (14 years old) to either do the job, or help Jango to speed up the repairs? Not saying Arla did not have her own share of duties and all (unless the kids were treated unfair, as Arla did not hold/use a gun against the invaders

but that could be just matter of her being too terrified or there could be not enough guns which is why only the mother was armed), but considering how the comics implies that Jango’s dad, mother and Arla were at home when he was working during sunny (if not hot) day, in the middle of a field, no shadow, repairing a vehicle bothers me a lot. 

And sure, on Concord Dawn living on farm could be just that tough even for kids, but looking at AotC novel (that admittedly does not mention Jango’s time with Mandalorians at all) 

Other than that, though, this was just a  job,  well  paying  and  easy enough. Financially, he couldn't have asked for more,  but  more  important, only the Kaminoans could have given him Boba - not just a son,  but  an  exact replica. Boba would give Jango the pleasure of seeing all that he might have become had he grown up with a loving and caring father, a mentor  who  cared enough to criticize, to force him to perfection.

or

This, then, was Jango Fett's greatest reward, right here, sitting  with his son, his young replica, sharing quiet moments.   Quiet moments within the tumult that had been Jango Fett's entire life, surviving the trials of the Outer Rim alone  practically  from  the  day  he learned to walk. Each trial  had  made  him  stronger,  had  made  him  more perfect, had honed the skills that he would now pass along  to  Boba.  

and old source material like outdated starwars.com’s databank entry:

Fett all but disappeared from bounty hunting circles as he took time to raise his son. He sought to experience what his life might have been like had he been raised by a caring guardian.

I can’t help but wonder about Jango’s childhood before the Mandalorians showed up.

So far my research showed, only Fact Files v.3 #14 mentioned he had "as idyllic a life as could be while making a living off the land, in close family unit with his mother, father and sister, Arla"

which gives some hope Jango's childhood although tough, was a relative happy one.

[Just to be clear here: I don’t think Jango’s biological family was by any means pathological, I just think Concord Dawn is a pathological place as this planet's record is not the best when it comes to people's backstories.]

[evilminji]

Okay this is going to drive me INSANE. D:>

Dearly beloved, Phandom darlings...

Can DANNY EAT VIDEO GAME/TV FOOD?

I... I NEED to know. You don't UNDERSTAND!? Think about it. No, seriously. THINK about all those HIGHLY unrealistic, too good to be true, PERFECT looking meals. Animated shows n games etc where there are chefs who will "cook for Anybody!"

Now think about being 14 going 20. A teenager. A broke college student. Your fridge is empty and everything you touch? Comes back to LIFE. You're... you're just so hungry. Tired. Your bruises have bruises and you have a paper due tomorrow.

I kinda want to CRY.

Can only eat cup ramen so many times before you DO.

And this show? That commercial? Yonder cooking game?? Well... they did a REAL good job animating it. It looks so WARM. So FILLING and COMFORTING. You can practically SMELL it.

You look down at your sad, soggy, cheap but you can afford it, EZ Noodles and? Feel something BREAK inside. You... you KNOW you can travel inside technology. KNOW this. Have done it before. Why... why AREN'T you? You can't keep living like this.

You gotta TRY, right?

I? Wanna believe it TOTALLY works?? Because Ectoplasm is weird like that? And just shrugs? Says "actual food, the concept of food backed by electricity, what's the difference? Sure, we can fuck with this"? And so Danny? IMMEDIATELY fucking switches his diet.

Like? Dead stop screech, slam on the breaks, u-turn to take that last off-ramp. Type IMMEDIATE.

Grocery bill? No, no, you mistake him! No. NOW it's his "carefully researched for their cooking, games and shows" bill. Touch his collection and he'll FUCKING BITE.

They got sticky notes on the cases. Menus n lil fold out "grocery store" locations. He punched a dragon for this fruit. Mmmmm, home cooked meeeeeals~

Just? Weird Foodie Danny. Yes he DOES know what those steaks taste like. While YOU fuckers were staring at the cat girls bizangas, HE was eating granny cat lady's home made meatball stew! Ha! YOU FOOLS!

More then that? I want him to write reviews. Like "yeah, fight system was OKAY but- *5 hour glowing rant about the food, sounding like a food critic who'd actually fucking gone and loved it* " and people are like?? Who? Is this funky lil madman? This is hilarious?

I want it to be DPxDC JUST? So everyone slowly starts to play the game "Meta or Shtick?" Because no one REALLY knows who he is. This dude gets POPULAR though. For some reason can't be hacked (shame on you guys! Way to try and ruin the FUN!). And like? Eventually? Someone just fucking ASKS?

And Danny is like... " wouldn't YOU like to know, weatherboy?"

So everyone is like:

"Meta."

But hey... since they're already ASSUMING~? >:3c WHOOOOO wants to help him PAY RENT~? Let's VLOG this fucker! Wooooo! Say "hi" Catchef! *feline noises* like? It's like a let's play combined with a mukbang.

Teen Heros everywhere are FACINATED. Game developers are suddenly like? "If there's food. You BETTER make it look amazing. We want that weird YouTube twink to... whatever his powers are, our game! Free viral marketing!" Food channels? Rending their clothes, on their KNEES, please! PLEASE! Just ANSWER OUR EMAIL! Just ONE SHOW! A one off! Guest appearance!

We have MONEY!!!

All while Danny? Is finally happy with his life. Weird as hell. Harrasing the world. Good food on the regular. Gets to travel, kinda. Best of all? He's raising money from it! Can help people! Now... who wants salad?

@babbling-babull @hdgnj @hypewinter @legitimatesatanspawn @spidori @dcxdpdabbles @the-witchhunter @lolottes

[clockwayswrites]

Birds birbs birbritch - Part 29

masterpost this is a first draft, please no editing or concrit <3

“Well, there’s the my horde of children,” Bruce said, glanced to Steph, and added, “and otherwise.”

“Hi B,” Steph said with a large smile that was just a little too much tooth, “and hi Danny!”

“Hello Stephanie,” Danny said. His wings were pulled tight against his back, as if he could hide them from view.

He couldn’t.

“Sorry B,” Dick chirped with his most innocent smile, “we were in the middle of a Mario Kart battle and you know how those can get!”

“At least tell me nothing is broken,” Bruce said, sounding entirely resigned about it all.

“Nothing is broken. Yet.”

“Well… good enough, I suppose.” Bruce said. “Though everyone had better sit though before Alfred comes in and fusses.”

“Too late, Master Bruce,” Alfred drawled as he came into the room with serving tray in hand.

They all appropriately scrambled for seats.

What with Danny being there, the normal seating (not that it always stayed exactly the same) was thrown into complete disarray. Mostly this was because Damian insisted on sitting next to Danny while Cass took the seat across from him and Tim next to her. Dick tried to stuff back him smile, but Jason caught it and rolled his eyes at his brother.

Still, it was sort of nice, in a weird way like when big cats have a service dog, to see Damian having someone out of the family that he felt the need to look over and protect. The suddenness of it all was what bothered Jason. Cass meets the guy and he’s invited to the ballet. Tim sleeps in his office. Damian wants to protect him. Even Bruce was at ease earlier with Danny sleeping on his lap. It was just like Danny belong there in with the rest of their family.

Jason didn’t trust it.

He especially didn’t trust it because it seemed to be having an effect on him too. He hadn’t snooped nearly as much as he could have in Danny’s apartment. Hell, the revelations down in the Cave that they had just had didn’t bother him as much as they should have.

Jason looked across the table to Duke, who was squinting a little at Danny. Jason kicked Duke lightly under the table and tilted his head in question.

Duke rolled his eyes, but pulled out his phone and sent: He’s got, like, an aura about him.

Jason frowned, typing back quickly: Did he at the ballet?

Duke gave a little shrug, but shook his head.

Well, that was very interesting. Jason wished that Duke had seen Danny when he was in full bird form so that they could have had a full comparison, but this was something at least. Danny had admitted that he was a Meta, but was he a meta like Wally was or more like Duke or even Kori? The odd language certainly pointed more towards Duke or Kori.

Dick nudged Jason with his pointy elbow. When Jason glared at him, Dick just looked pointedly down at Jason’s plate and back up.

‘Eat,’ he mouthed.

Jason rolled his eyes, but dug into the meal. It was a vegetarian pasta of some sort. Salad and garlic bread were also on the table. Basically a nice, carb heavy meal to have after a long, hard day. Jason had to wonder if Alfred would even let any of them out tonight. None of the ‘kids’ for sure. Tim, Damian, and Steph were all certain to be grounded. Dick, Jason, and Cass could probably make a good argument to go out and get started on this Mad Hater thing, but Cass might prefer to stay close. Jason couldn’t really blame her for that if she did. She deserved to get to be close to her family.

Jason caught Dick’s gaze again, raising a curious brow with a little head motion down towards the Cave. Approximately.

Dick nodded, a seriousness in his eyes.

Okay, guess they had a plan.

-

Bruce found them as they were suiting up. He leaned against the Batcomputer and watched as Dick and Jason bickered and hindered each other actually being able to get dressed for patrol. It was good to see them able to be brothers like that again. Therapy with Harley had really been helping Jason and Bruce knew that Dick was seeing someone, even if he hadn’t pried into who. Bruce didn’t think it was fair too when it had taken him as long to start seeing help.

It was something he wish he had done far earlier.

Had pushed for all of them to do earlier.

“What are you brooding about over there, old man?” Jason called out. He’d finally wrestled his gloves back from Dick and was pulling them on.

“I can just be somewhere without brooding,” Bruce said.

Bruce sighed. “I was thinking how proud I am of both of you for making good of the therapy that you’ve been doing.”

There was a long silence before Jason mumbled ‘sap’ and ducked his head. Dick just grinned back, a faint blush on his cheeks. As old as they two were, they were still his kids.

“If I stay in tonight, will you two be fine out there?”

“Doubting us?” Jason asked. His voice changed part way through as he put on his mask and the modulation kicked in.

“Never,” Bruce said, which seemed to make Jason freeze again. “Just asking you want me out there as back up.”

“Stay in with the others,” Dick said with a little shake of his head. “I know they’ve brushed it off, but Dami and Tim have still been through a rough day. And Danny too. You should be around if anyone has issues in the night.”

“Let us go out and start investigating,” Hood added. Even with the mask, here was a softness to his voice. “We’ve got this.”

Bruce nodded. He knew they did. “I’ll keep a comm if you need me.”

“Sure. Just make sure to get some rest, old man,” Jason said and headed towards the bikes. Nightwing followed with a little wave.

Bruce stayed in the Cave until they were gone and then grabbed a communicator to slide into his ear, just in case.

[gotham-adrenaline]

Let’s be real though, for the longest time Kon truly had no idea how normal humans are supposed to act.

Like logically he’s aware of how the average human body should function, but he was just not in an environment that allowed him to properly grasp what the limits of this are.

Tim is by far the worst for Kon when it comes to learning about people’s standard restrictions, especially those who aren’t metas.

Because why was someone on the bus complaining about only sleeping 6 hours a night this week? That’s ridiculous! Tim can go a week with only 6 hours total (and then fall into what is essentially a coma while all cuddled up under the blankets during a team movie night, but that’s irrelevant).

Last month a girl from one of his classes attempted to chat with him after class, joking that their professor was trying to kill them after he assigned a 10-page essay due in less than a next week, which is kind of weird since Tim wrote a 20-page essay with additional references and citations titled “Why Bart is Being Stupid and Needs to Listen to Tim’s Plans or Else”, and that only took a few hours (and then he started giving Bart these little cartoon stickers after missions if he listened and didn’t recklessly endanger himself, which was honestly really cute of Tim and made Kon slightly upset when Tim didn’t give him one too, but that’s also irrelevant).

And seriously, why is this man screaming so loudly after he only sprained his ankle? If he couldn’t handle a little pain, he shouldn’t try and mug people in Metropolis during broad daylight and within shouting distance of a Super. Besides, Tim got shot by an arrow in the thigh last week on a mission and just sighed in annoyance before continuing to download the data off the hidden lab’s computer (and then flushed bright red and didn’t complain once when Kon insisted on flying him back to the jet but that’s extra irrelevant and not something he can dwell on right now).

Kon brings this up one day to Clark, not expecting much of a conversation beyond “Hey, humans are weird, huh?” but Clark looks genuinely confused for all of 5 minutes until stuttering his way through an explanation that Tim (and the team as a whole) are the exceptions, and that the civilians he’s seen behaving “oddly” are actually very normal.

Which, in retrospect, maybe he shouldn’t have blurted out how amazing he found Tim and then fly away out of embarrassment the moment he saw Robin next, but also… well he IS amazing, and he could stand to hear it more often. Way more often… Kon would have to help with that.

[unknownplane]

The Court Jester Part 3

Yandere Batfam x GN Reader

Pt. 1, Pt. 2, Pt. 4

The Joker came closer, almost inspecting the job (Y/N) had done. His eyes run over the Bat.

"Good job with the knots, my little Jester. That will keep him there for as long as we want!" The Joker exclaimed with a large grin. "Now, how did you get him here so fast! I must know!"

"I can't tell you, Dad! It would ruin the game. And we love the game!" (Y/N) explained. (Y/N) went up to the Joker and side hugged him. Bruce saw this and started struggling.

"What have you done to them! They said you 'Trained' them! I know you! Tell me now!" Bruce screamed.

The Joker's smile widened as he saw the Bat struggle. "Peanut, would you be so kind and get your dad something to drink? I am absolutely parched." The Joker said with honeyed words.

"Of course, dad!" (Y/N) said, jumping at the opportunity to please their dad. They ran out of the room hoping to get a drink as fast as possible.

"Look at them. I'm so proud of their growth. You know they were so sad when I first met them. They were only 5. They were looking for someone to talk to. Can you believe it, Bruce Wayne, ignoring one of his own while still taking in new kids. Can you imagine how that felt?!" Joker laughed unknowingly rubbing salt in Bruce's wounds.

"It was perfect, you know. Them being in such dire need of affection and not caring who it came from! A perfect opportunity for me to step in and take them away! At first, they resisted. Fought so hard not to succumb! They even called out for you. Did you know that!?" Joker confessed, stunning Bruce. Even after all he did, you still called out to him? You called for your dad, your real dad.

"It took a while to get them like this. Lots of training. Brutal, really. Though nothing I haven't done to you and your birds, just in a shorter period of time." Joker stated as if he was talking about weather and not torture. This shocked Bruce, remembering all the things the Joker did to his family. "How are they alive?!" Batman questioned.

"That's the funny thing, Bat! No matter what I did to them, they wouldn't die! They would get injured, but only a few seconds would pass, and then it would completely heal! I even cut off an arm, and as you can see, they have both now! Amazing, isn't it!" The Joker exclaimed. This stunned Bruce. (M/N)'s child was Meta? No. He would have noticed.

"Now, what is taking that child so long?" The Joker said brazenly.

With (Y/N)...

(Y/N) scrambled around looking for a bottle of water when someone came up behind them. They were suddenly grabbed and restrained. "The fuck!" (Y/N) exclaimed. "Relax it's just me. I'm here to save you." Jason whispered assuming (Y/N) would stop fighting when they heard it was him. (Y/N) struggled to move surprising Jason giving them a little wiggle room. (Y/N) jabbed their elbow into Jason's stomach pushing him back into a coughing fit.

With Jason off them, they turned around. "You aren't supposed to be here, Hood." (Y/N) stated glaring. They move their hands to their hip and pull out a small stick. They hit a button, and it enlarges to become a marotte.

(Y/N) swings at Jason as he tries to dodge, not wanting to hurt his sibling. This goes on until something pierces (Y/N) in the back of their nape. They start slowing down until they pass out.

"Took you long enough." Jason said flatly, going over to (Y/N). "They were putting up more of a fight than we all thought. I needed to get a clean shot." Damian claimed. He was lying to himself. He just wanted to assess how his older sibling fought, and from what he could tell, if they were taking this fight seriously, it wouldn't have ended well. "Let's just get them out of here. The others are waiting." Jason said, knowing that when he got to the manor, he would finally get to be the sibling they needed.

Giddy, he picked them up as if they were the most precious thing in the world and started leaving. "I'll go help dad." Damian said flatly as it seemed like a chore.

With Batman...

"Why? Why would you do those horrible things to a child?!" Bruce questioned. "For fun." The Joker spoke with a wolfish smile.

The door crept open, catching Bruce's eye. He saw his youngest creeping in the room. "You know I believe this is one of the only instances in which I would be willing to kill you." Bruce said, letting Damian he had permission to try and kill the Joker. "Really! I pushed you to that level with this one joke!? How wonderful! I will have to keep this in mind for later! Now, if only that bra -" a sudden gunshot stopped the Joker from finishing his sentence.

Blood rushed from the left side of Joker's face as he fell to the ground dead. "Where is your sibling?!" Bruce questioned with urgency. "They are on their way home with Hood. If we leave right now, we should be able to get there at the same time." Damian informed Bruce. "Good now untie me so we can leave. Your siblings got a mean knot." Bruce commanded.

-------------------------------------------------------

@cooki3dough @asillysimp @kitty-from-daaaa-voidddd @redkarmakai @horror-lover-69 @bat1212 @wisefuncherryblossom

[deadsetobsessions]

“I think I’m going to move to Gotham,” Jazz’s tapped away at her laptop, clicking through her college acceptance letters. Danny sat up from where he was scrolling through his phone and stared at her. “Thoughts?”

“And prayers,” he sassed. “Because you’re going to need them. Why the would you pick Gotham when Harvard accepted you?”

“Gotham has Arkham. And Doctor Quinzel.”

“Isn’t she Harley Quinn? The Crime Princess of Gotham?”

“Yeah, and an acclaimed psychologist with hundreds of published work that revolutionized the mental health field! Sure, she’s more criminally inclined now, but I’d kill to pick her brains.”

Danny grinned. “Interesting word choice. You’d fit right in. It’s just weird that all of their psychologists turned into villains.”

“Okay, but I won’t. You’d stop me.”

“Or I’d join you,” Danny rolled back onto the floor.

“Don’t you dare, Daniel Fenton. You’d better stop me if I went villain.”

“But I feel like you’d have a pretty good reason for it though?”

“I appreciate the trust, dumbass, but I’m always this close to loosing it.” Jazz rolled her eyes as she jabbed a finger at Danny.

“Hah! You’ll fit right into Gotham!”

Jazz hummed. “So, Gotham?”

“Yeah, why not?”

——

“Danny!”

“Little busy!” Danny dodged a blast from a GIW agent.

“Why’d you pick up, then?”

“You don’t call often- hey, can you guys knock it off? I’m on a call!” Danny shouted. Surprisingly the agents stopped.

“Woah. You guys actually stopped?”

“We’re anti-ghost, not rude cavemen. Finish your call, Phantom, so we can get back to capturing you.” The agent with red hair said. Her partner nodded their head.

“Riiiight.” Phantom floated away a bit. “What did you want to talk about?” He asked Jazz.

“So, Dr. Quinzel-”

Danny heard a further off “Call me Harley, darling!”

“Harley,” Jazz continued seamlessly. “Is dating Ivy, a meta! Which, totally cute and their relationship is so healthy. Goals, honestly-”

Danny heard another far off comment, “Awe, thanks, Jazzy-wazzy!”

“But long story short, they got in touch with the Justice League about the GIW and they’re getting pulled back! And disbanded! Are you fighting the agents? Can you see if they’ve got the order to pull back?”

“Wait, seriously?” Danny perked up, the exhaustion from the fight all but gone. “I’ll ask.”

Danny turned to the two agents, pulling the phone away from his ear. “Hey! Did you guys get orders to stop hunting me? I heard the Justice League got involved.”

“What? We didn’t-”

“Shit, wait, we got orders.” Her partner jabbed their phone at her.

“Fuck. This isn’t over, Phantom!”

“Yeah, yeah! Shoo!” Danny watched them peel away. “Thanks, Jazz! Maybe I’ll finally get a peaceful school year.”

“R.I.P.” Jazz solemnly intoned.

“Dead-ass.” Danny replied, just as seriously before the both of them broke. Cackling, Danny said goodbye to Jazz.

“Maybe I should get some gifts? Hm… Undergrowth has some rare plants.” Danny muttered as he flew back home.

[tritoch]

I wish people were willing to have a slightly broader or more expansive understanding of FFXIV's women because I think there's so much there in terms of easily-unearthed subtext that no one really thinks about! And I don't mean this in a "people need to re-evaluate their response to the women of Stormblood" way (though I do think that's largely true), I mean I think fandom's understanding even of the women it mostly likes is pretty weak. And you can say that's because the women are underwritten, and I won't argue that they couldn't use more attention from the writing, but that doesn't prevent you from analyzing them the way you can any character in fiction.

Like everyone's always like, oh, Y'shtola and Krile are like your snarky wine aunts, haha. But...Sharlayan is a pretty ossified and patriarchal society from what we see of it in Endwalker and places like the AST quests. Can we open ourselves to the possibility that it means something that almost every young Sharlayan woman we meet, almost all young women in academia, tends to be a little sharp and quick on the retort? The arch and snarky ways in which those two carry themselves reflect in some sense the facts that Krile is almost literally a nepo baby woman in STEM who is barely older than her students, while Y'shtola learned her behaviors from her much older female mentor, a woman who hated Sharlayan academic culture so much she literally abandoned it to go live in a cave.

Or like, Alisaie! Fan jokes and meta frequently buy into her tendency to characterize the dynamic between her and Alphinaud as a jock/nerd, street savvy extrovert vs book smart introvert thing. Except, tragically, Alphinaud's highest stat is 100% Charisma and he absolutely pulled in his student days. All his greatest achievements are diplomatic, and he very easily develops strong friendships with people in every culture you learn about. Alisaie is the determined, sensitive genius who revolutionizes Eorzea by proving the tempered can be healed. She's just permanently carrying a chip on her shoulder that while she and her brother are remembered as the youngest students in Studium history, actually he got in six months before her, a fact pretty much no one else ever brings up once. She's constantly fuming over the fact that he was marginally better than her in certain specific ways in high school, and looking to differentiate them in ways that actually fail to credit her own obvious strengths and accomplishments. I think that's so fun! It's so juicy, and it's equally good for comedy or serious character studies.

Venat is a genuinely benevolent hero who has no compunction sacrificing lives for the greater good. Minfilia is kind and compassionate and clearly on some level actually buys into the narrative of her own unique moral authority. Ysayle is a revolutionary firebrand with almost no concern for the common man, whose death reflects her Javert-like inability to reconcile her own romantic belief in justice with the tragic ways her blinkered worldview (born largely of trauma) let her be easily co-opted by a violent system. But even people who like these characters rarely move past surface-level reads (people who think Venat is just an all-loving mommy figure make me want to fucking die). The fandom is allergic to drawing connections the game doesn't draw, and fails to recognize that FFXIV is a game where characters voice understandings of themselves and others that are wrong about as often as they're right.

You can already see the ways that women like Wuk Lamat and Cahciua and Sphene are getting flattened or losing their shading in fan reception and it's boring. Like I'm not even saying this because you should take female characters more seriously or something (though you should), I'm literally just bored to tears sometimes and if you guys turn Wuk Lamat into another Hot Dumb Jock Lady, I will combust.

[idontcaboose]

Haunted car Au part 11

Previous. Masterpost

When Duke woke up, he remembered the fight he had with Bruce last night. All in all, it was actually what Duke wanted to happen in a way. Duke got full access to “fix” the Batmobile, but just the way Bruce made it sound was just… Infuriating. Like, sure, blame the newly 17 year old kid who had only moved the car, not even a hundred feet, for everything wrong with the car. Being benched until he figured out how to get whoever was possessing the car sucked though.

The good news is that the only people who would be awake to bother him or ask unwanted questions would be Alfred and maybe Tim. If Tim got on his case it would be simple to call in Alfred or to threaten him with calling in Alfred. The only other people that use the cave like the front door are Dick and Jason. Both would be up for hiding the issue from Bruce once explained. Dick would be a bleeding heart to a potential meta/alien kid getting stuck because of their powers. Jason would keep the secret just on principle, especially if told Duke got blamed for something he had no hand in. Jason would probably help set the kid up after he gets out of the car too, assuming Bruce doesn't pull a Bruce. It would be nice to not be the only meta in the family though, and the kid would already know about the family, but that would be the kids choice.

After a short breakfast, Duke made his way back down to the cave, only to hear a…Rave?

He made his way through the cave following the muted music to… the car…

“What in every hell are you doing?” Duke could not help to exclaim as he saw the Batmobile, for lack of a better comparison, dancing.

The car was strobing its headlights from the yellow driver's lights, to the brights, to the color changing LEDs Jason and Dick put in for a party prank that Bruce never removed, all to the beat of some techno that had to have been in Tim's Playlist. The car stopped in its perceived dancing to open its door in another mockery of a wave causing the music to become almost deafening as the door opened. Duke had to cover his ears as the kid in the car panicked and set off its alarm before turning everything off. If Duke thought the cacophony before was deafening, the silence after was even more so.

“Seriously, what the hell kid?” Duke said with as much incredulity as he could muster.

The car responded with a slow turning of its front wheels and a quieter sound of ‘Sorry’ by Justin Beiber playing, which could have been from either Dick or Steph’s playlists.

“You know what? I am not going to deal with song names and lyrics to guess from. Give me a second.” Duke went to the Batcomputer and found Tim's folder containing all of the sound bytes and clips that he uses when he gets real malicious with the power points for his team, the JL, or for Bruce when he is being exceptionally pissy, and downloads it onto a large USB stick. It took a little longer than Duke expected, but within an hour the USB was downloading its new playlist into the Batmobile’s radio storage. The sound bytes should be better than songs, right?

“GOOOOOOODDDDDD MOOOOORRRRRRNNNING GOOOOOOOTTTHHHHAAAAAAAAAMMMM!!!!!!!!!!”

“God dammit Tim”

Next

@kizzer55555 @sebas-nights @candeartist422   @trappednyourheart @fandom-life-corrupted-me @tkiesai @2lbballpeenhammer @admiralwidow @rewrittenwrongs @whotfevenknowsanymore @symmetricalastigmatism @thespacedragons @atinygracie @okami-love  @lesbian-spider-drone @1n0sss @forgetmenot-bluepurple

[aha-chuu]

I love the absolute disparity in star rail's approach to aventio's canonical power levels

This comes up because I was thinking about Ratio, who despite being a good DPS is not actually intended to be a strong fighter in the lore at all. Like, he has no weapons training to speak of, no inherent powers as far as I can tell. He's physically stronger than an average person in our universe, but he should lose most fights we throw him into in game on account of trying to hit mechs with chalk or, at best, a book.

His ultimate move - the one with the Latin voice line where he drops a tower on the enemy - the translation of that is about perception changing reality. Basically, when he tips his hand from far away, it looks like he could crush the enemy under his finger. He's not actually summoning a tower here.

And then you have Aventurine, who (despite not being as buff) is a good fighter in every sense. He has actually got more legitimate hand to hand combat experience for one, but with the cornerstone he does have actual magical abilities that let him stand against the trailblazer squad before Acheron stepped in.

In the meta, Aventurine is the support and Ratio is the main fighter. But in the lore - both ability wise and in story content - Ratio is absolutely the support. He's moving around in the background to help with Aventurine's plan, he's not directly getting involved in the fighting, and he's the one trying to protect Aventurine with that final Doctor's note about the dormancy.

And like. You're not supposed to take either of their combat abilities too seriously. Like Ratio throws the chalk for a follow up because it's funny, unlike when svarog shoots missiles to protect Clara, or Blade slashes the whole field. Even Topaz throwing Numby is a more realistic reflection of what she'd actually do in a fight. Meanwhile, Aventurine's abilities are not funny, really, but they're all so thematic that it's hard to imagine he has the genuine capacity to summon a giant roulette wheel to stick the opponent inside.

And a lot of the characters have abilities that do make more sense for their in game capabilities. Like, Seele and Jing Yuan and Acheron are canonically fighters, so of course they can beat up the enemies as main DPS. Bailu and Natasha are doctors so they heal.

(Ratio is also literally a medical doctor and does not heal.)

And anyway I find this objectively very funny. My guy was involved in Aventurine's insanely dangerous plan in close quarters with Sunday, the main problem, and realistically his only means of self defense was jumping behind aventurine or trying to concuss Sunday with an encyclopedia. Even though we know Ratio is great at designing weapons, there is not one lick of evidence that he a) uses them himself, or b) would be any good at putting them into practice.

I get Aventurine had other things to worry about that whole time, but Ratio is not a good liar (he breaks character like three times in the quest 😭) and really realistically could have gotten them both murdered. I guess we were relying on the aventurine magic luck for that one.

Also if we're being lore accurate, every aventio bodyguard au is doomed if Ratio is the bodyguard.

[wistfulnightingale]

A Mini-Meta Musing (#2)

What a brave and handsome demon, eh? Courageously facing down the forces of Hell, standing tall despite the threat to his very existance. Crowley showed such fearlessness when he was dragged off to his diabolical trial.

Except that's NOT Crowley. The demonic good looks remain (!), but we know that's actually Aziraphale. The angelic Principality. In Hell. About to be sentenced to an unknown fate.

I've been thinking a lot about Aziraphale lately. Tonight, I was thinking about the incredible Courage Aziraphale showed in his willingness to appearance-swap with Crowley. It was also incredible Love.

Agnes Nutter's prophecy only said, "Ye must choose your faces wisely, for soon enouff ye will be playing with fyre." Nothing about Holy Water or rubber ducks. Hell has a very, very long list of things it can do to punish someone, demons included, many of which might "play with fire." Aziraphale went into Hell not knowing what tortures he'd be facing. But he knew one thing for certain...

He was going to protect Crowley, at any cost.

Over the millenia, Aziraphale had seen many times where Crowley was under constant threat of punishment. I talk about how this affected Aziraphale in another post, Anything to Protect Crowley.

Now, after helping to prevent the Apocalypse and living to tell about it, they get a predestined warning that the danger is far from over. A charred shred falls out of a book of prophecy. The forces of Heaven and Hell want to destroy them. They will be playing with fire.

Our Ineffables are clever, and they've been learning a lot, fast, about how similar angels and demons actually are and what each of them are capable of. Aziraphale can possess humans, and move them from one location to another (the airbase guard). Crowley can survive hellfire, even though it discorporated Hastur. Crowley can play with fire. So they decide to do the unthinkable -- The Appearance Swap.

They take it seriously, indeed. Aziraphale and Crowley had to convince Heaven and Hell, and for a time, they had most of us convinced too. Crowley was enraged at how his angel was being treated ("Shut your mouth and die already"), but he forced himself to smile and fawn and be as polite as an angel with a death sentence could be. Aziraphale, meanwhile, is trying to be cocky, clever, sardonic, every bit the swaggering demon he can be. But look closely. He's not succeeding very well at first. He's subdued. The words sound like Crowley, making ironic jokes. But his head and neck are tense, shoulders rigid. His lips are parted as he looks around in dismay. He genuinely doesn't know what to expect.

If Heaven wants to play with fire to punish an angel, there's likely only one way to do it. But Hell has infinitely diabolical ways to punish a disobedient demon.

"What's it to be? An eternity in the deepest pit?" -- Aziraphale

Aziraphale chose to go into Hell with no certainty that he would ever come out again.

Please pause for a moment. Imagine the Love. The Commitment. The Incredible Courage that choice took.

Aziraphale was willing to risk eternal punishment for Crowley.

Thankfully for our Ineffables, Michael breezes in with the Holy Water. Aziraphale stammers in surprise, but his face is angry as he watches the Holy Water fill the tub. Heaven is only cooperating with Hell to bring about a horrible death for Crowley. His Crowley. He's furious. His posture straightens, he quips about the new jacket. By the time he's splish splashing in the clawfoot bathtub, he's got a very rebellious and smarmy Crowley vibe going on, with just a bit of British-posh angel lingering around the edges.

"I don't suppose that anywhere in the Nine Circles of Hell there's such a thing as a rubber duck?'

Aziraphale then threatens Hell. Threatens. Hell. "So... You're probably thinking, if he can do this, I wonder what else he can do. And very very soon, you're all going to get the chance to find out..." Ominous. An empty threat, a calculated risk.

He convinces them to leave Crowley ALONE.

"Aziraphale is a coward?" "Aziraphale doesn't really love Crowley?" "Aziraphale only cares about himself?"

No. Sorry. That's a mistaken interpretation. Look closer.

He's not perfect. He's actually very human. He's lived here for 60 Centuries, after all. Sometimes he's confusing, contradictory. Aren't we all sometimes...?

But Aziraphale literally allowed himself to be dragged into Hell to save the Being he loves. With no guarantee of returning.

Does Aziraphale love Crowley?

Hell yeah.

[tealvenetianmask]

If You Act Like You Don't Need Support, People Believe You: Blitz's "Bulletproof" Act

We know pretty well by now how Blitz's outer shell looks and why he built it. He's carrying a whole cargo load of trauma, and he doesn't want to get hurt anymore. So he puts his natural resilience and charisma front and center and channels all negative emotions into being an asshole. No one gets in.

I think we often fall into seeing Blitz's mask as all negative. But one thing I took away from Ghostfuckers though is how much the people in his life actually find security and comfort in that same shell.

Millie:

Based on her backstory, who can blame her? The final sign that made Millie trust/respect Blitz enough to agree to his job offer?

I can blame this partly on imp culture (valuing toughness), but also, Millie says "you're fucking weird," and I think that comes down to how Blitz doesn't look angry or scared even for a moment. He keeps the smile. The charm. "Unbothered."

When M&M give each other most of their attention (understandable), Blitz just pushes his way past their boundaries anyway, seeming to make a game out of it. We see in Ghostfuckers that his jealousy of M&M, his fear that they don't really care for him . . . that becomes part of his trauma reel. But his friends have no way of knowing that.

When he's on a solo mission in Wee-a-boo-boo, Blitz tells Millie in no uncertain terms that he's got this.

So yeah, Millie's truly never seen him SERIOUSLY upset before, even if WE'VE seen him screaming into the abyss (Truth Seekers) and crying himself to sleep (Ozzie's).

Luckily, Millie has the capacity to adjust and offer the support that Blitz needs.

Loona:

I think Loona gets comfort too from Blitz's outer shell. This time, it's not so much that Blitz never shows her that his feelings are hurt. But that he bounces back quickly. That he always ends up fine.

And at an even farther extreme, Loona can literally throw Blitz across the room and have him doting on her again later that day.

There's comfort, especially when you're someone with a temper, in knowing that there's someone who you can't really hurt, who will stick by you no matter how you behave.

But again, in the Ghostfuckers trauma reel, we get a clip that shows us that's not true either.

Like Millie, when Loona sees Blitz at a true emotional low (this time, his guard is lowered by alcohol . . . and perceived rejection from Stolas), she's able to adjust and be supportive.

Stolas:

Was fairly careless with Blitz's emotions in Season 1, until he saw some vulnerability in Ozzie's and immediately started rethinking his approach.

We often talk about Blitz not realizing that Stolas is vulnerable, but the opposite is also true.

I'm thinking about the flirtatious classism, the teasing, the initial idea that the book deal would be fun and sexy. I think it stems, at least in part, from the idea that Blitz is amazing, that his spirit is kind of unbreakable.

Which again, is not true. His optimism and resilience are wonderful, but he can be hurt (intentional reference to Blitz realizing the same about Stolas).

After the debacle that is Ozzie's, after Stolas sees Blitz in pain from the treatment he received and unable to believe that Stolas's romantic interest in him is genuine, he understands much more. He immediately starts trying to undo the deal, and later in that process, there's this beautiful line . . .

"It's not enough to get through the walls you've conjured up to live."

Stolas isn't there yet by any stretch, in terms of understanding Blitz fully, but even while hurt, there's a part of him that wants to understand, that knows that Blitz is hurting under his mask.

Moxxie:

Ahaha. I bet you thought Stolas would be the twist ending of this meta. NOPE. It's Moxxie. He's the only person close to Blitz who hasn't even begun to adjust to seeing Blitz be vulnerable yet.

Not to psychoanalyze the poor guy, but. His daddy issues are off the fucking charts. Not in a sexual way (though who knows). In a sad way.

Moxxie was raised to follow authority, and the consequence for not doing so was death. Crimson made it very clear. And that's horrible, obviously, but also, there's a certain level of comfort in having everything decided for you.

In having someone who's "got this" in charge. Cult survivors often recall feeling this way.

And I'm not saying Moxxie wasn't incredibly relieved to be rid of Crimson or that he was happy under his control in any way.

But he likes that Blitz is confident, unbothered, and takes care of his team.

I'm done looking for exact lines and screenshots because I have a dinner to get to, but Moxxie does ask in his Truth Seekers hallucination why Blitz pushes his friends away. But he never gets a clear answer, never sees beyond the symbolic mask that Blitz wears there.

And in Unhappy Campers and in Ghostfuckers, we really see him crumble without Blitz's confident leadership. Millie, letting Moxxie take charge and having her own needs that have to be met . . . isn't really enough.

And this is a problem.

Moxx needs to learn some confidence because the unshakeable Blitz he follows . . . doesn't really exist. So I'm interested in seeing how this develops in upcoming seasons.

[cookinguptales]

So… I’ve been turning all this over in my head since last night, and I wanted to make a post about vampiric transformation as sex, and how it’s being used in wwdits as a metaphor for sexual repression, sexual freedom, virginity, and cuckolding.

Before I even get into the obvious metaphors about virginity and cuckolding, I think we need to talk about the elephant in the room. Guillermo’s sexual repression and how that’s come to find an outlet in his vampiric longing.

Guillermo is highly repressed, sexually speaking, but I don’t think he’s asexual. He’s shown interest in sex several times, but in an uncomfortable “this can’t be for me yet” kind of way. He was clearly raised Catholic and has internalized a lot of that shame re: sex, especially gay sex. He wants intimacy, but he’s also internalized the idea that wanting these things is dangerous and shameful.

But… the vampiric world seems to symbolize all the things that Guillermo wants but cannot have. He wants to be strong, powerful, attractive, and sexually liberated. As much as their openness about sex embarrasses him, there’s a certain longing there, too. He didn’t just want to be handsome as a vampire — he explicitly used the word “sexy.”

A vampiric Guillermo is a version of Guillermo that gets to have sex. Loudly, proudly, and without shame. It’s a version of him that is wanted, that wants, and who gets to have the precise kind of intimacy he's always craved.

Now, how much Guillermo has actually done sexually is still up for a lot of debate in fandom, but I think that’s kind of immaterial. For most of the show, Guillermo clearly wasn’t having the kind of intimacy that he wanted to be having, and he only started to even begin to allow himself to seriously consider all that in s4, when he got a boyfriend and came out to his family.

As being gay and wanting to be a vampire. 

Guillermo is finally starting to own both his homosexuality and his vampiric life, and that means he’s finally starting to explore sex.

Now… At the end of s4, I talked about how Guillermo going to Derek in the finale had the air of a person who’d been fantasizing about losing their virginity in a certain way all their life — but then they finally give up on those dreams and hire a sex worker instead. There’s a resignation there in Guillermo that he couldn’t get it “the old-fashioned way,” he’s disappointed and jaded when it comes to intimate relationships, and now he’s tired of waiting for love and just wants a business transaction.

I wasn’t quite expecting for them to push that metaphor even more in s5! The money aspect was almost forgotten (Did… Derek even take the money? Why is he still cleaning toilets?) but the scene with Derek biting Guillermo was clearly a metaphorical virginity scene.

Guillermo’s nervous eagerness, his growing realization that this wasn’t actually the way he wanted it to happen. Asking Derek if he’d ever done this before and figuring out if he was “ready.” Taking off his clothes (that his grandmother got for him, even, that’s a whole meta post right THERE) and trying to make the vibe “right.” His insistence that though Nandor had never done this for him, they still had a caring and intimate relationship.

But… it was also a metaphor for bad sex. Many people lose their virginity in a way they don’t find satisfying, and Guillermo definitely seems to fall in this category. It was awkward, it was bloody, it hurt, his partner didn’t listen to him, they weren’t on the same wavelength, they didn’t connect, there was no emotional bond, and most importantly, he didn’t feel changed.

Like a lot of people do, Guillermo thought losing his virginity would change him. He’d be cooler, sexier, more powerful. His station in life would change. He’d become an adult his ideal form. But he’s still just Guillermo.

As he told Laszlo, as soon as he did it, he regretted it. He immediately knew that he’d been right, that this wasn’t the way he wanted to do it. He wanted to do it with someone experienced who loved and cared about him, who listened to him, and he wanted that person to be Nandor. But he wasn’t patient, he paid an inexperienced acquaintance for a one-night-stand instead, and he was left feeling deeply unfulfilled.

Most upsettingly, he immediately discovered that, like virginity, you can’t lose it twice. He can’t just have a do-over with Nandor now. He’s given something up that he can’t give to anyone else, and he’s going to have to live with the consequences.

Because like sex for humans, transformation has social implications in the vampire world. It can only be done in very specific situations. Guillermo seems to have grown up in a human world where sex should only be happening within a heterosexual marriage, and now he’s finding that in the vampire world, transformation is only supposed to happen between a master and familiar currently in a contractual bond.

So… him going to Derek and finding “outlet” in another relationship, so to speak, is effectively vampirically cuckolding Nandor. He’s given that honor to another vampire, which Nandor seems to find both vampirically humiliating and personally hurtful. It would in fact hurt him so badly that he would probably not survive it, in Laszlo’s words.

(There’s also definitely an element of an abusive “if I can’t have you, no one can” vibe in Nandor’s threat to kill Guillermo and then himself if Guillermo got what he needed from another vampire, but since when have we ever liked them well-adjusted?)

Guillermo is realizing that, as much as he’s been thinking of this in sexual terms, so have the vampires. He thought he was the only one who thought it was a big deal. He thought he was the only one placing intimacy and partnership and loyalty into this event. But now he’s realizing that as much as it meant to him, it might have even been a bigger thing for Nandor.

For Guillermo, vampirism-as-sex represents the idealized transformational aspects of losing your virginity. He’d built up this big event in his mind that represented his intimate bond with Nandor, he’d built up this idea that the event would change him, would make him better, would make him free. But he’s finding, like many first-timers do, that sometimes it’s not transformational. It’s just awkward and disappointing and the only thing that’s changed is that you ache in the morning.

He still doesn’t have the intimacy he wanted. He still doesn’t have the ability to be loudly himself. He still hasn’t been able to fully own his sexuality and ask for what he wants. He wasn’t ready. He didn’t enjoy it. He regrets it.

He also regrets it because now he knows it will hurt Nandor and the relationship they’ve built. Because for Nandor, vampirism-as-sex represents the societal aspects of sex. The rules people follow. The societal humiliation you feel if you’re cuckolded. The personal agony you feel when you’re cheated on. The sense that your home is broken if your partner goes to find satisfaction with someone else.

Guillermo, who has had to deal with societal disapproval of his desired type of sex in the human world his whole life, was viewing vampiric transformation as a way to be free of all that. The shame and the repression and the societal penalties for being himself.

But he’s just found himself in a mess of new rules, hasn’t he? Different culture, same struggle. And while the vampiric world has always symbolized a sexual liberation that both repulses and attracts Guillermo, he clearly doesn’t have as much freedom here as he thought.

So… to sum up, Guillermo always kind of thought of transformation as losing his virginity. He associated vampirism with sex, and he thought this would be his entrance into the sexual world. He wanted to have an intimate experience with Nandor, but eventually gave up on that and decided to pay for it — and then immediately regretted it, both because he found it personally dissatisfying and because it came as a betrayal to the man he loves.

The problem is that he thought he was the only person thinking of it as sex — he didn’t realize that Nandor does, too, just in a very different way.

Nandor was also thinking of vampiric transformation as this special act, and one that belongs only to him as Guillermo’s master/partner. He was thinking of it in intimate terms, but also in societal partnership terms. He’s thinking of his household, while Guillermo was thinking of things on more individualistic terms.

If only they’d both talked about all this shit even once. :’)

But that’s not how we do things here in Staten Island!!! We just long for things ineffectively, keep secrets, and fuck everything up!

(There’s also a whole thing here about how Nandor wasn’t keeping his side of the relationship bargain and that’s why Guillermo looked elsewhere in a moment of weakness, but I guess that’s probably a separate post. This is long enough already.)

[nelkcats]

Phantom Park

Look, Danny hated clowns, he really hated them, but theme parks? He loved them, when one of the tours came to Amity his Rogues agreed with the feeling after having fun for hours.

And they offered a truce in exchange of forming their own thematic park for a while, and go over the world, wich sounded bad at first, he didn't want to leave Amity, but some vacations...

Ghost thematic Park it is

So, they created a lot of attractions, give Ember her own concerts, Skulker had a place showing how to hunt, Johnny and Kitty had fun with their motorcycles, Technus was administrating some cool games, Lunch lady was making some food for everyone and he had his own ice rollercoaster, they were having so much fun ¡they even made some money!

Now, if only the heroes stayed out of their business would be wonderful, this was the six time he was being "interrogated", they were traveling for god sake, they have a schedule, Batman didn't appreciate it

But Danny didn't care what Batman thought, they weren't metas, they weren't invading anything and everything was legal, the lord of vengeance could go sulk elsewhere, and he let him know, the six times he couldn't find anything

Really, it was not his problem if Harley, Ivy and Klarion liked the park, villains have free time too, his own rogues were having fun and Red Hood, Arsenal, Kid Flash and Nightwing were eating ice cream with them!

Is not his problem if they were too "bright" for the "heroes" or whatever, Flash was the only one with some respect at the end of the day when they passed his city

Seriously, most of the heroes were treating them like criminals, dealers or simple villains, which was starting to frustrate him a lot, his rogues tried to comfort him, but the brilliant and dumb heroes didn't understand, ¡This is a truce! his own "villains" (he never saw them as such) were laughing, playing, and completely peaceful without causing anything harmful

At some point in the interviews, Danny got fed up, did the heroes want to play this game? Fine, there's a reason people say don't treat someone like a villain or they'll see themselves as one, and even though Danny wasn't bad, none denied that he was petty, so at his next stop he decided, it was time to prove how haunted the park was and teach these guys a lesson

[biblicallyaccuratecrow]

in stars and time "method actor" au braindump

the people have spoken! welcome to the method actor au! in which i took the theatre themes of isat and stretched them to their absolute limit!

the premise is that instead of saving vaugarde, the party + major side characters (the king and euphrasie) are an acting troop! and they're telling the story of the saviors through a play. Siffrin is playing The Traveller, and over time in rehearsals has really grown to like his castmates (even the one playing the king- he's actually quite sweet!).

it's the opening night! they're more than prepared for the show!

... until they aren't.

All it takes is a faulty prop from the fly tower, and suddenly siffrin is right back where they started the day before, waking up from a nap in the greenroom before the last rehearsal.

they're back at the beginning. they get a second chance.

after all, you only get one opening night, and siffrin is determined to make it perfect.

...all they need to do is make sure the show goes smoothly!

no stage hazards,

no missed lines,

no injuries,

no deaths,

no mistakes.

and if they have to play the hero to do it?

if the lines between them and their character have to blur so that their parts are perfect?

so be it.

the show must go on.

[notes below the cut!]

[spoilers for isat below!]

so yeah, siffrin takes the term "method acting" way too seriously. out of necessity, though. this is a performance, after all! they have to keep it together for the show, and the best way to do that for them is to embrace their role.

setting

still takes place in vaugarde! except yknow. the king isn't actually happening (yet), so instead of a group of saviors we have the acting group playing the saviors! a bit meta, but it works.

craft and the island still are a thing, and play a major part in the overarching story! this is still a time loop, after all!

all of this is taking place on a stage within dormont's house of change! Euphrasie sponsors, and was more than happy to be included for her very short role! The theatre there has been out of use for decades, but Euphrasie sees it fit to resurrect it just for this show!

The party:

Mirabelle is the playwright, having dreamed up a story like the books she loves to read but for the longest time being too afraid to put it down. Euphrasie encouraged her to go through with it, and they've been building the show ever since! she thinks she isn't a good actor, but she's actually very empathetic as the heroine, since she (secretly) based it off herself.

Isabeau was actually the first to audition- and the only one, at least in the first round. He came in last-minute, and after delivering a solid monologue (with a few puns slipped in), Mirabelle was eager to cast him! He actually loves costume design, but he doesn't dare to reveal this to the party, even if he occasionally spends hours in the House's storage room looking through pieces from older performances.

Odile was a surprising addition to the cast. She was interested in Vaugardian tradition, and figured the best way to learn was through the epicenter of vaugardian culture, at a house. She reccomended some plays to mirabelle from her travels, and after giving some pointers on mirabelle's early scripts decided to join in for the hell of it. She likes horror productions in particular, and contributed a lot to the concept of the king's time craft.

Siffrin was visiting the house, and came to see one of the plays... but got the time wrong and came in during a live-reading of the scripts early draft. he stood and watched for a bit before mirabelle noticed, and after a LOT of fumbling and apologies admitted that he loves theatre. Mirabelle practically dragged him in after that. Given that he didn't have anything else to do, he agreed. Despite claiming he's not much of an actor, much preferring to work on the set design, he's actually uncannily good...

The King is... just a guy, actually! very quiet, very reclusive, but after seeing one of mirabelle's casting calls came in and absolutely smashed the audition. he's been with the group ever since! he's pretty busy outside of the production, but he puts his all into his work! He and siffrin have a kind of kinship, given their shared elusive background and... white hair, i guess.

Bonnie is the younger sister of Nille, who worked on trade classes at dormonts house after the two left Bambouche together. Mirabelle needed someone to help make the sets, and Nille volunteered early on in the production, so long as she could bring Bonnie along. Initially Bonnie wasn't all that interested, but after hanging around the cast a bit grew curious. Siffrin caught them reading through one of the scripts and acting out the various parts on their own. After that, Mirabelle made the time to write in The Kid for Bonnie to have a role thats easiest for them! Fun fact- a lot of The Kid's lines are actually ad libs from Bonnie throughout the production. Mirabelle kept writing them into the script as a sort of inside joke.

Euphrasie is mostly the same! As the head housemaiden, she's had a bit of experience with public speaking and acting, and after seeing Mirabelle having such fun she allowed herself to be roped into a small role as The Head Housemaiden in the production.

the story...

Siffrin's first death is actually to a prop rock falling on top of them. When they wake up, they're back in the green room, waking up from a nap. Isa is out by the favor tree as usual, odile is buying food for the cast party, mira is pouring over her dating profiles disguised as her script, and bonnie is hanging out in the auditorium.

Of course, at the favor tree after the first death is loop. They immediately cast siffrin as the "new director", and from there basically acts much the same as in canon, though a lot of the "memories" are slight improvements to siffrin's acting or the set props.

so, despite all their preparation, the performance keeps getting interrupted in increasingly more and more bizarre ways. A strange array of stage accidents, usually resulting in siffrin's death. They initially suspect that the show is cursed (theyre not that far off), and start to dig into how that could happen. this is where the idea of wishcraft gets introduced. The King seems the most likely to be highjacking the show, but siffrin doesn't want to believe it.

As siffrin performs show after show, things start to get... weirder, somehow. Like the performance is becoming more real with each passing loop. This doesn't just extend to the set, but also to siffrin themself. The line between them and the traveller blurs. As they learn more about wishcraft and the forgotten island, they project this into the story and their performances, and even off set will take mannerisms from the traveller role and use them to brush off the party's concerns.

in later acts, the rest of the cast begins to blur with their own respective characters, to the point that siffrin starts to become irrationally aggressive towards the king, somehow believing him to be responsible. Loop does their best to keep siffrin's handle on reality in tact, but by act 4 they're essentially living out the play. there is no distinction between reality and mirabelle's script- it's all one thing. And the wish makes that true during the performances as well, in ways that even the party can notice- ghosts on the stage, reality warping because of props, even randomly improved sets and staging. The further siffrin descends, the stronger the wish's influence over the performance and their reality grows. by act 5, the wishcraft has transformed the house to reflect that of the play, and everyone to be their characters- or be frozen, as a captive audience. the rest happens similarly to how it does in canon.

the real crux of the issue, like in canon, is that siffrin made a wish. They love their cast, and they love their performance. They want it to stay like that. They want to stay with them. And so they wish at Dormont's favor tree. And it comes true, in the best way the universe can manage- by making it so that the performance never ends. The actual hazards of the set are real- Dormont's theatre is borderline decrepit- but once the wish craft begins to influence things, they become more serious.

i initially had the idea that maybe during the first loop the story becomes real, like what we see in canon, and siffrin is reacting to the actual characters as a literal actor, but i like the idea of the party playing their SASASA counterparts as more base/easily digestible protagonist versions of themselves more. plus like, the idea of it all being literally on a stage is too fun for me

the hilarious thing is, in my mind... the audience wouldn't know that wasnt the intention for the play. in their pov they saw this shit being acted out and not the absolute wacked out acid trip the party saw while on stage. it's an instant success, though the entire party agrees to never put on the show again.

thats about all i got so far? dunno if i'll actually write anything for this, and if i do it'll probably be a one shot or two. but if youre interested in more info abt the au, or just wanna chat about it, feel free!

until next time!