#seriously i never have to use other awakening units for these

[a-pale-azure-moon]

The Chrobin strategy cruises to victory again!

[mirai-e-jump]

Animage March 2024 Issue ft. Ohsama Sentai King-Ohger Main Cast Member Interviews (translations below)

Publication: February 8, 2024 (between episodes 47-48)

-Their six hearts are now united as one-

Sakai Taisei: Gira Husty/KuwagataOhger King of Shugoddam. In actuality, he's a being created by Dagded. He vows to his older brother Racules, who had been fighting to save their people, that he'll carry on his will as king.

Watanabe Aoto: Yanma Gast/TomboOhger King of N'kosopa. He was brainwashed by Hilbil, and was about to be consumed by the power that he possessed, but after being punched by Gira, he snaps out of it and they defeat Hilbil.

Murakami Erica: Hymeno Ran/KamakiriOhger Queen of Ishabana. While she was conflicted by the possibility of conquering death through the eternal life that Jeramie possessed, she was determined to use it to defeat Grodie.

Hirakawa Yuzuki: Rita Kaniska/PapillonOhger King of Gokkan and Chief Justice of the Supreme Court. They trust Morphonia, their retainer who they've known since law school, and entrusts Gokkan to her as their potential successor.

Kaku So: Kaguragi Dybowski/HachiOhger Lord of Toufu. Wishing for the happiness of his younger sister Suzume, who is in love with Racules, he decides to remove her as a potential successor. Together with Rita, they seal away Minongan.

Ikeda Masashi: Jeramie Brasieri/Spider Kumonos King of the Bugnarak. He was born between a human and a Bugnarak, and wishes for both to coexist. He teaches his people, the Sanagim, how to live hand in hand with others. _

The Six Kingdom Unusual Incident Countermeasure Lifesaving Force, also known as: Ohsama Sentai King-Ohger. Centering around the kings of the six kingdoms of Chikyu - Gira, Yanma, Hymeno, Rita, Kaguragi, and Jeramie, it's an alliance formed so they can fight a common enemy, free of personal interests and across all borders.

The kings, who are the rulers of their counties, often took different actions after the formation of the Royal Sentai due to their pride, responsibility, and the mission and beliefs that they held in their hearts. Still, it's also true that a solid bond was formed through their battles.

The event that symbolized this was the second "Wrath of God" by the awakened Grodie. Making the most of their abilities and the power of their countries, the kings trusted each other, and skillfully worked together to bring the situation under control, achieving a miracle of zero casualties.

Even though they talk about it being for the benefit of their country or their own mission, the concern they have for their citizens is mutual. They may never get used to each other, but they don't hesitate to join forces when there's an emergency. This sense of distance and detachment is perhaps the greatest characteristic of the Royal Sentai.

The only remaining enemies are Kamejim, the last of the Uchu Five Jesters, and the Uchu King Dagded, who is responsible for everything. However, the Royal Sentai still don't have the means to defeat Dagded, who possesses unparalleled power. As the decisive battle between the Royal Sentai and Dagded approaches, let's see how it goes down until the final moment! _

-Gira's best scene!-

Murakami: My favorite scene is when he's eating a daikon radish in episode 4! (laughs).

Kaku: How nostalgic!

Murakami: I really liked it! Also, his "archaic smile" (episode 11).

Sakai: Ah! Towards the beginning!

Murakami: Yeah, the child of god Gira. The part with robo Gira was funny too. It's unforgettable.

Watanabe: I liked when he said "Woyal armz!" (episode 45).

Hirakawa: He said something like that (laughs).

Ikeda: That was cute.

Murakami: I liked that too (laughs).

Ikeda: His pill bug (pill taxi) outfit was also cute.

Sakai: I also liked the pill bug costume. And then, there was the confusing scene with Kaguragi towards the end……(episode 15).

Ikeda: The, "Laugh for me!" part. It's cool that you said it so seriously while looking like that.

Kaku: It was a passionate scene.

Ikeda: Jeramie was also watching that exchange nearby, so I remember that scene well. It was also funny to hear him say things like "Poopsopa" (episode 2).

Sakai: I wish I didn't say that.

Hirakawa: I think for me it's the trial scene in episode 5. Out of all the members, Rita was the only one who strongly judged Gira, and I remember Gira's reaction and the change in his facial expression when they told him the facts one by one during the trial. As the presiding judge, they're the only one looking directly at Gira's expressions.

Kaku: That seems to be the case now that you mention it!

Watanabe: As for cool scenes, I like the part in episode 17 when he dodges Yanma's fist. Taisei and I watched it back together 2 or 3 times and said, "Oh! This is it! This is it!" (laughs).

Sakai: Gira is often by someone's side. If it's a main episode for Yanma, he's by Yanma's side, and it's the same for the other. I think that main episodes with Gira being alone are probably the least common.

Kaku: That's true.

Sakai: Still, that's what I really like about them.

Kaku: I think for me, it's when he angrily armed himself with the royal armor in episode 29. When Jeramie betrayed them along with Gerojim.

All: Oh~!

Hirakawa: The part with Hilbil! He said, "That wasn't for you."

Kaku: Right.

Hirakawa: It was definitely cool when the beam of light shined from his eyes.

Kaku: Also, the scene where Gira's face turns into King-Ohger (episode 40).

Sakai: That might be my favorite.

All: (laughs).

Ikeda: Your facial expressions were good too (laughs).

Watanabe: The day after the broadcast, we called Taisei "King-Ohger" (laughs).

Sakai: I was the only one who truly became King-Ohger, so, it was an honor.

All: (burst out laughing).

Hirakawa: It's definitely special (laughs). Gira also has a good character song. I especially like the beginning.

Sakai: The English part. I think it matches Gira's worldview really well.

Ikeda: It's like a culmination.

Sakai: Right, Gira's a culmination.

Kaku: Eh? Shuu"taisei"? (*shuutaisei = culmination)

Ikeda: Yes, you got it (laughs).

Murakami: You're so quick at making puns like that……(laughs).

-Yanma's best scene!-

Kaku: My favorite was, (waving his hand) "Gi~ra~!"

All: "I've come to help you~!"

Murakami: The one where Gerojim impersonates him (episode 8).

Watanabe: That episode was my first time at Mt. Iwafune (a reoccuring location in the Super Sentai series), so I was really excited (laughs).

Hirakawa: Before filming, he looked at the mountain while brushing his teeth and kept saying things like, "Yikes" and "Amazing."

All: (laughs).

Hirakawa: When the camera was pointing at him, he was all smiley and doing peace signs (laughs). In the Yanma, or rather, Aoto scenes, he seemed to be having alot of fun during the body swap episode (episode 28) (laughs). It was funny.

Watanabe: I'm glad you weren't angry at me.

Hirakawa: I wasn't angry (laughs).

Kaku: You kept rolling your eyes (laughs).

Sakai: Do you feel like your range of acting has expanded because of that?

Hirakawa: Yeah, it's expanded. Yanma played Rita in various ways, so when I returned to being Rita, I think my range of the role expanded abit.

Watanabe: I see.

Hirakawa: I don't think you do (laughs).

Murakami: For me, I think it's the "Guess I've become a privileged person." scene (episode 35). Up until that point, Yanma often stood his ground, so I like how he accepted the situation as he watched N'kosopa burn.

Watanabe: That scene was made to look like it was in the evening, but we filmed it first thing in the morning. Furthermore, it was the first scene to be filmed for that episode (laughs).

Hirakawa: That's rough (laughs).

Murakami: Amazing (laughs). He talked about having privileges before with Hymeno, so I was wondering if he found himself back there by chance.

Watanabe: Yeah, he talked about it in episode 7. For scenes in N'kosopa, the hacking battle was also hard……(episode 2).

Kaku: It was really cold, wasn't it?

Watanabe: I couldn't stop my body from shaking or my teeth from chattering. I'll never forget that. I was only calm during the actual performance.

Ikeda: You were extremely focused.

Kaku: I'd name that one as one of the best scenes.

Hirakawa: I'd agree. You worked hard and it paid off.

Ikeda: There were two scenes that I particularly liked with Yanma. One was the scene where he announced himself to his opponent, Daigorg (episode 17). The way he said it was totally different from how he usually said it, and it was very manly. The other was when he was being manipulated by Jeramie (episode 36).

Murakami: That one was funny (laughs).

Ikeda: The awkward dance performance was so good that I bursted out laughing (laughs).

Watanabe: I learned the choreography from Ikeda Sensei.

All: (laughs).

Watanabe: I was told to improvise that scene, but I have no knowledge when it comes to dancing. I asked Masashi for advice, and he taught me the Awa Odori dance of Tokushima, his hometown (laughs). He really helped me out at that time.

Sakai: For me, it's episode 44. In episode 17, Gira dodges Yanma's punch, but in this episode, it's reversed. As I played the role, I was moved, as I was reminded of those days.

Watanabe: And after that, when we beat Hilbil, it wasn't a parody, but I said the same line as in episode 2, being, "Know your place!"

Sakai: That's right!

Watanabe: That was real hot.

Ikeda: Gira and Yanma have quite a few scenes showing the passionate friendship between them, don't they? Truly, a great duo.

-Hymeno's best scene!-

Watanabe: I think I'd pick the body swap (episode 29).

Hirakawa: The way she said "Royal Arms!" was amazing.

Murakami: I'm sorry for doing something that Kaguragi wouldn't do (laughs).

Kaku: It's mutual (laughs).

Watanabe: Matchless Murakami

Hirakawa & Kaku: Matchless Murakami (laughs).

Kaku: I haven't been able to watch the footage yet (at the time of this interview), but it looks like episode 46 will also produce some great scenes.

Watanabe: Yeah, it's between Jeramie and Hymeno. They said some wise words.

Kaku: The movie was also very good.

Sakai: I also really like, "No one can do it but me," when she saves Racules (episode 42). I feel that she's full of confidence.

Kaku: That was really cool. It had a "Black Jack" feel to it. (*character from manga series of the same name)

Murakami: I feel that most of the memorable scenes for Hymeno are related to her family and life.

Kaku: Also, the rage filled fight against Jeramie (episode 14).

Ikeda: I was scared at that time (laughs).

Murakami: Sorry for being so strong (laughs).

Watanabe: In the episode before that, we were beaten up by Jeramie, but this time Jeramie was instantly defeated by Hymeno.

All: (laughs).

Hirakawa: The power balance turned out to be amazing (laughs).

Sakai: There are quite alot of angry scenes.

Murakami: That's true.

Kaku: Especially when it comes to her family.

Murakami: Yeah, the word "you" comes out. I thought it was out of character for Hymeno, but that's what happens when it comes to family matters. (*informal "you" was used)

Sakai: When she got mad at Jeramie, Gira told her that it makes her face ugly.

Murakami: I remember the Director telling me at the time to "make an ugly face." (laughs).

Sakai: I feel kinda bad (laughs).

Hirakawa: For me, it'd have to be episode 30. It's the scene where she faces Grodie. As Rita, she stopped me when I was trying to use the secret technique, so I feel like there was a strong bond that formed between the two of us. It was filmed during the really hot season.

Murakami: It was really tough! I wasn't used to filming on location because we usually only film in the studio, so I was thinking, "I want to be freed from this heat!" (laughs).

Hirakawa: Well, we overcame the filming process by supporting each other. We gained alot from each other through the performance, and the relationship between Rita and Hymeno was established from episode 30, so it was very memorable. It's always touching no matter how many times I watch it.

Ikeda: The episode where Kamejim disguised himself as Hymeno was also good (episode 36).

All: Ah~!

Ikeda: The disguised Hymeno's performance as a villainess was amazing, and I think it showed the strength and beauty of the real Hymeno. I also loved how she said "Let's dance!" with so much energy (episode 34).

Hirakawa: You say that all the time (laughs).

Murakami: That's what Sakanashi Yume-san (KamakiriOhger's Suit Actor) says, so I get really excited when I say it (laughs).

Ikeda: Your pronunciation was also good.

Watanabe: I sometimes want to try and adlib in some English.

Ikeda: I get the impression that she uses English when she's agitated (laughs).

Murakami: That's what happens when I try to show her innocence (laughs).

-Rita's best scene!-

Kaku: For Rita……I guess we can't leave out the idol episode, huh? (episode 38).

Watanabe: Obviously.

Sakai: I think the idol episode is my favorite too. There's a scene where Gira fights with them over the Moffun picture book.

Hirakawa: That's right, that's right. The part with, "Moffun isn't needed anymore, right?!" We practiced that alot, didn't we? Things like, "I'll go this way."

Kaku: Oh~!

Hirakawa: We ran around alot.

Ikeda: I also liked when they changed into the royal armor with the idol costume. Girls must've loved that.

Sakai: It was like Sailor Moon.

Hirakawa: I spoke in a lower voice than usual. Rita was irritated.

Ikeda: Yeah, they were mad.

Hirakawa: Right, that's why it was very low.

Kaku: For upcoming episodes, there's another cool scene in episode 48.

Hirakawa: They say something to Yanma.

Sakai: It was cool.

Kaku: Also, Rita is silly when they eat something like dangos. They try to eat it from above their high collar (episode 5).

Murakami: Rita and food are a good match, huh?

Hirakawa: Eating scenes are pretty difficult. Ultimately, I couldn't even eat those dangos.

Kaku: Is that so?

Hirakawa: Originally, that scene was alot longer, as I was trying out different ways of eating it.

Ikeda: I also like the scene where they dive to grab Moffun.

Murakami: Ah! When they were tricked by Dagded! (episode 31).

Ikeda: Right, Hymeno was playing the role of the plushie.

Hirakawa: Rita shouts, "Moffun!" and lunges for it. My voice was added later during the dub.

Watanabe: Ah, "that one" is probably my best scene (laughs).

Hirakawa: Which? (laughs).

Murakami: He's laughing so hard (laughs).

Watanabe: The scene in episode 4 where Kaguragi calls Rita. It's the part where they walk very slow. Rita, in the beginning, every time they walked, they went super slow.

All: (laughs).

Murakami: It was the same for episode 5. They were reeeally slow (laughs).

Watanabe: I was like, "Can't you just walk normally?!"

All: (burst out laughing).

Hirakawa: You wouldn't stop complaining (laughs). He was saying things like, "Walk so I can hear you!" (laughs).

Watanabe: I want you all to watch it again (laughs).

Murakami: I think I really like the body swap episode (episode 28). If you look closely, you'll see that they're like a DJ (laughs).

Kaku: Yeah (laughs).

Murakami: Normally, Rita can't really break their character, right? That's why I really liked seeing Hirakawa Yuzuki when her screws were loosened. It was also funny to see them trying to get everyone in prison to go home.

Kaku: The "Yay!" part.

Hirakawa: The "careful on your way back" scene.

Murakami: Dialog like that wasn't written in the script.

Hirakawa: I was told to "Just do what fits" (laughs). I thought alot about what to do.

Watanabe: Also, they had such a happy face when they talked to Gira, who was in Jeramie's body.

Hirakawa: It's the part where they say, "We stomp him out and the problem will be solved." Rita never smiles, so I thought I'd show their teeth!

-Kaguragi's best scene!-

Murakami: I really like your interactions with Suzume. I especially like the scenes when Iroki appears from 17 years ago.

Kaku: Episode 37, right?

Murakami: Right. That episode depicted Kaguragi's determination and resolve, and the way he armed himself with the royal armor through the katana was cool.

Kaku: Well, I thought I had been forgiven for everything.

All: (laughs).

Ikeda: I want you to sell me that katana.

Sakai: I'd pick the scene with Iroki from that episode. The exchange with her while the castle was burning was really amazing.

Ikeda: When Suzume first appeared, his "siscon" behavior was uncanny but cute (episode 15).

Kaku: It's not Suzume (acting that way)? (laughs).

Ikeda: Right, it's Kaguragi (laughs).

Watanabe: For scenes with Suzume, I liked the look on his face during Racules and Suzume's wedding (episode 20).

Kaku: He was abit dazed and confused (laughs).

Watanabe: I really like Kaguragi's facial expressions. At some point, you mentioned that the way you smile is based on Ghibli films.

Kaku: Yeah, I think we talked about that.

Watanabe: I remember thinking, "I didn't know he had such an approach!" The scene in episode 39, where Kaguragi looks up at the night sky after defeating Goma made me think, "Ah, this has a Ghibli feel to it!"

All: Ah~!

Watanabe: The way he grinned was very Ghibli like (laughs). It's hard for me to explain it well though.

Ikeda: Does it feel alittle creepy?

Murakami: The smile didn't match the setting, so it's very memorable.

Watanabe: It comes off as creepy and cute at the same time.

Kaku: Cute? (laughs).

Ikeda: Also, there's that other best scene too. His sleeping face when he swaps bodies with Hymeno (episode 28).

Watanabe: The sleeping face of an angel.

Ikeda: An angel (laughs). The sigh that came from him……what else can I say?

Watanabe: An angel's breath.

All: (laughs).

Kaku: You're teasing me~ (laughs).

Murakami: Can you please stop making yourself cuter than the "real one"? (laughs).

Kaku: No, no, the "real one" is cuter than me, right?

Ikeda: (looking at Murakami) Your face is becoming bright red (laughs).

Murakami: Eh? You're kidding?!

Sakai: It's really red (laughs).

Hirakawa: I think it's episode 45 for me. Kaguragi and Rita didn't have that much of a relationship with each other. They didn't have that many scenes together in that episode either.

Kaku: That's true. It's because they're both together with Morphonia and Suzume.

Hirakawa: Right. I really enjoyed the scene where the two of them used the power of the King's Proof.

Kaku: I also became a red oni.

Murakami: That was amazing (laughs).

Hirakawa: That red oni was wild (laughs).

Ikeda: He was as red as Marie's face just now.

All: (burst out laughing).

Kaku: My bad~ (laughs).

Murakami: I seriously need you to cut it out (laughs).

Watanabe: The person in charge of being cute for King-Ohger is me though~

All: (laughs).

Hirakawa: He went and said it (laughs).

Ikeda: You're putting yourself in a dangerous position right now.

Watanabe: These two guys here (Murakami and Kaku) are tough.

Kaku: Does that include me? (laughs).

-Jeramie's best scene!-

Sakai: There's alot for Jeramie.

Murakami: First, there's the battle with Desnarak (episode 26). I really liked that one.

Kaku: We made fun of it by imitating the "It's bright…" scene.

Hirakawa: It's funny when the person who actually fought says it (laughs).

Kaku: Still, that scene was good. While recording the dub, I actually cried.

Hirakawa: That's true, I could hear you sniffling next to me.

Ikeda: Immediately after the recording he said, "I can use this line when inviting someone out to a drinking party."

All: (laughs).

Watanabe: "You're coming too," right? (laughs).

Hirakawa: That's what he said (laughs).

Kaku: Yeah, that's right (laughs).

Hirakawa: I think for me, it's the scene where he declares the founding of his nation in the live broadcast to the people (episode 26).

Kaku: It was something about humans and Bugnarak joining hands.

Hirakawa: Right, "I want you to pass on the story that we were able to reconcile." That speech was really good.

Murakami: I think Jeramie's slightly mischievous and childlike nature is also a key point. It was the same when he was manipulating Yanma in episode 36, or the episode with Racules and the whoopie cushion (episode 19). I guess I like those mischievously funny scenes. There are alot of cool scenes though.

Kaku: It was really cool when the Spider Mask came off (episode 11).

Hirakawa: He flung off his cloak

Kaku: I used to imitate the line, "I'm just an old fashioned storyteller."

Ikeda: And you were good at it.

Kaku: That's when the Jeramie Brasieri competition started, hosted by me (laughs).

Ikeda: Oh yeah. "Is there anyone better than me?!" Isn't that what you usually said?

All: (laughs)

Kaku: That's right.

Sakai: I wonder what it was like stepping on Jeramie (episode 37).

Watanabe: We were trying to eat Grodie's rice balls in Toufu. Gira, Yanma and Hymeno trampled him.

Sakai: It was surprising to see that Gira would step on Jeramie, and I had to put alittle effort into it during filming (laughs).

Ikeda: Yanma was rubbing my butt (laughs).

Kaku: That was funny (laughs). I don't know why Jeramie was being stepped on, since the episode didn't depict that part.

Sakai: I wonder if Jeramie was desperately trying to stop Gira and the others. He gets pushed too hard, and then that happens.

Hirakawa: He gets crushed by three people.

Murakami: Sorry about that time.

Ikeda: Hymeno was the nicest.

Watanabe: It's episode 29 for me. After Jeramie finishes giving his fake speech, Jeramie's song (The Prophet) plays when the five fight.

Hirakawa: It was good!

Watanabe: Jeramie wasn't there, but it felt like the six of them were fighting.

Ikeda: In that scene, you could see the relationship between the five of them from their expressions.

Murakami: It was also sad and beautiful when he said, "Sweet dreams" and then disappeared.

Sakai: It was great (applauding).

Ikeda: Thank you.

[maritotoy]

MAUGA X Support/Medic Reader ((Part. 1))

NOTE: Believe it or not, I never realize how long I've written this one.

This narrative tracks Mauga's obsession with Y/N as it grows to the point where he is prepared to kill everyone who stands in his way. With this in mind, Mauga's commitment would gradually grow. He would start out softly and then this need on you would get stronger.

It all began when your talents were initially utilised for recruitment. You were a terrific help, willing to assist your teammates in whatever way they needed.

Your main issue was that you could never truly let them handle things on their own. As a result, it became increasingly difficult to care for yourself.

They promised you riches if you helped them fight back against their threat. There were only so many ways to profit from rival worlds, after all. You were aware that you were going into a whole new universe when you agreed, but you also felt that you had no choice but to accept them.

Ultimately, you didn't wish to pass away, did you?

It was stated to you when you first joined TALON Organization, that you should concentrate only on the battlefield. Up until you met Baptiste, an exceptional combat medic, it was great with you. Your shared enthusiasm for curing illness is what unites the two of you. It turned into a shared passion. As you try to acquire experience in several areas, like medical supplies, you both hope to discover some more useful abilities, like healing or even a unique kind of combat capability.

But you can hardly ever get to Baptiste, he's constantly at the top. Both a combat mercenary and medic. You're always looking for ways to sharpen your skills.

Even after meeting him again at your base and on missions, you are still determined to improve your ability to deal with any possible emergencies. Not until later do you find out what happens when a member of your unit gets injured.

Baptiste surged in, carrying an imposing stature and a solid, muscular frame. His voice sounded desperate, asking, "I'm sorry if I came to you! I know you are busy, but I need help with my friend, please, Y/N!" The urgency was so obvious that there wasn't much resistance. Even if he was a doctor himself, it must have seemed urgent enough.

Besides... You were in the right place to help.

You rushed over to his side and helped him stabilize his huge friend. "What happened, Bap? Are you hurt?" He didn't reply, but his eyes told you all you needed to know.

You fix your sight on his pal. He does not appear to be hurt or seriously damage. However, the man's body is completely soaked, which looks very suspicious to you. "Is he alright, Bap? I don't see anything wrong." He shook his head and gave a sigh.

"We were attacked. Mauga and I found the source of the enemy attack and got separated."

"How long has it been since then?"

"Four hours, maybe five."

"Do you have any idea of what may have caused the damage?"

"I'm not sure. However, I had already discovered him unconscious but unharmed on the ground. It should not take long for him to awaken.." You glance at the unconscious man again before you say, "Let me take a look at him." He nodded and stepped aside.

"Mauga could never be wounded by shots like that. Despite his size, he could easily absorb one hit thanks to his physique." He explains.

You crouch down and check on his comrade. He seems fine to you. There's nothing unusual about him, other than the fact that he's a bit too heavy.

You knew Mauga.

And with such.

You just don't know how to engage with him.

On a conversation? Yes. Your profession is your duty.

You don’t really get along with those who rely solely on themselves as an advantage, even though you respect their abilities.

The feeling is mutual. Every time someone gets hurt because of something beyond their control, you are there to help them.

Because that's your job as a medic.

You both have quite a difference in interests, though. You can't stand the fact that he’s so reckless, you can't understand why he doesn't think more carefully before he acts. As soon as he sees blood, it's always the most important thing.

Mauga stands tall, towering over his opponents with an impressive height of 7'5 ft tall. (My headcanon)

Mauga is a formidable opponent on the front lines thanks to his strong, muscular physique. His broad shoulders and thick neck gives off an air of strength and power, and his body is well-built, demonstrating his strength and capacity to deal severe damage to rivals.

Did I mention he has two hearts?

Unlike you, Mauga is a ruthless and cunning individual, driven by his own motivations. He never lets anyone interfere with his goals, whether or not they involve you. While he might act with reckless disregard sometimes, he is also able to calculate the best course of action.

Not anyone knows this. But you knew nontheless with Baptiste.

You may be underestimating him in some way, or you may have witnessed the genuine thing, up close and personal, but he always brags about his achievements without hesitation or shame. His fighting style turns wild and unpredictable when he fights. If Mauga doesn't want to win, he will take his time, before using ChaCha and Gunny, his chainguns, to grab the victory, and he won't give up until he achieves his objective.

He definitely is careless, isn't he?

"He's breathing just fine, Baptiste. I would say he is in perfect health, aside from the injuries, I can't detect any signs of any damage injuries either." You said as you stood up. Baptiste sighs relief. "I'll leave him to you doctor. Don't worry, I trust that you have everything under control." He says this to you while nodding in satisfaction.

This gesture of his is a way of gratitude towards the medic's work.

"I will be back later," he says as he leaves to make a round to prepare for battle.

While Baptiste was gone, you sat next to the downed mercenary soldier and begin to observe him. In the midst of his unconsciousness, he seems to be in a good state. There was no sign of discomfort or pain. His pulses are fast but steady, knowing that Mauga have two hearts, one that allowed him to replace his damaged, organic heart with a cybernetic one. That way, his heart will beat twice as fast. You can easily tell that Mauga is in his natural state.

Your eyes began to feel heavy after observing him for some time. You weren't sure if it's due to fatigue from watching him, or simply exhaustion from your duties as a medic.

Before you knew it, you fell asleep.

When you awoke, you find yourself staring back into the face of Maugaloa Malosi, whose lips formed into those flashing, same pasted smile as usual. “Ah, Doctor. How nice to see you again.”

You quickly wake up, sitting straight up on the chair. “M-Mauga!" You exclaimed, alarmed. "H-How is you- I mean are you feeling alright?”

He grinned at you. “I am feeling rather fine.” You let out a long, sigh of relief. However, you didn't anticipate that this would happen frequently. “I see..." You replied.

Silence takes over for a while. Mauga stared at you intensely before taking a step forward. “Your Y/N, correct? Baptiste little assistant. I've heard much about you, but never expect that I would get to get treated from you.”

You flinched slightly at his words 'assistant' and the word 'little', but you remained calm. “I'm glad that you feel better now. You should rest and recover. If you still need them..."

“I appreciate the concern,” he says as he reaches towards your shoulder. You instinctively raise your hands in preparation of blocking. This caught him off guard, causing him to pause in his movements, then booms laughing.

“My apologies, Teuila. I thought that you might have forgotten what I do here,” he said in that familiar, friendly tone.

“If I recall correctly, I haven't given you permission to touch me.” This comment caught him off guard as he chuckles deeply.

He stares at your hand for a while longer. You're beginning to become worried. After a brief silence, he reaches forward and lightly holds onto your wrist.

“That’s a very sensitive spot…” He whispers gently. Your heartbeat begins to accelerate. “And your pulse is fast. Is this normal?” he asks. “Yes,” you respond in a soft voice.

“Then why are you afraid? You know I'm not going to hurt you...” He grinned. His sharp teeth glinted menacingly in the dim light. "Surely you've already made a friend? You also gave him a lot of attention than you do with me. Or have you grown to dislike me?"

"...I... I beg your pardon-" your speech is interrupted by Baptiste with a tired expression.

"Hey... Sorry that I took so long. I went to gather supplies. Mission was a success." He sighed in relief as he approached you.

"Mauga, I'm glad your awake bud." Baptiste sighs in relief and smiles at Mauga. Mauga returned the gesture before looking back at you.

He still has that huge grin plastered across his features while his eyes darted towards yours. "You're crazy out there Mauga. Do you really think that you can defeat the enemies single handedly?" Baptiste says with a chuckle. “You know me Baptiste, I never do things without planning them out.” He grinned, revealing that row of dazzlingly white teeth. “I still don't understand how you've been knocked down so easily. It's hard to believe that you can be beaten like that.” Baptiste gives a half smirk, half frown.

You listen to their conversation, and you try to make sense of it. Mauga laughs at the situation, as if it's all so obvious. "C'mon, Baptiste, we have bigger problems than me right now. The mission is a success because we finally found the enemy camp. But it was a close call, and we needed your medical expertise to treat the wounded," Mauga explains to Baptiste while looking directly into his eyes with a sly smile. "I carried your massive ass in this camp with support of your weight alone. You ought to be pleased to have a subordinate with such skill." Baptiste smirks. He was referring to you. Mauga laughs at his friend's criticism, displaying his amusement at the circumstances.

"So yeah. It was pretty rough, but we managed to secure the objective! Isn't that great news?"

It's not really a surprise to you.

Mauga does tend to put himself in danger, especially when he's in an unfamiliar place.

This guy is completely reckless, which is why you can't believe that he managed to survive so many battles without falling apart or breaking down.

"Your a loose-canon, but I hope ended well..." you say calmly, hoping that you sound convincing enough.

"I can assure that I have the highest respect and admiration for your abilities as a medic. I would never doubt your skills, even if I hadn't personally experience how skilled you are in dealing with wounds." Mauga comments, he sounds sincere as ever.

Baptiste grins again. "That's a big ego of yours, my friend. You should consider giving a few compliments to the people who did more than you."

"I would love to, my friend, but there's nothing wrong with being modest about our accomplishments."

"Alright," Baptiste said, sounding annoyed.

--------

After several hours, days, months of treating your patients at base. You cannot help but wonder seeing Mauga quite often, whether that is purely because of duty or something else. Although it is difficult to tell what he's thinking, there are moments where you notice the way that he is constantly staring at you. Like he's trying to figure out something about you:

studying your appearance, facial expressions, mannerisms. Sometimes he gets lost in his thoughts, sometimes he appears to be lost in his own world, occasionally, you could catch him smirking knowingly, or even smiling to himself. These small gestures usually only occur during times when it's with you with him. Sometimes, the man is just too cheerful, or too energetic in general.

You could hardly handle the stress of handling all these patients in the infirmary on your own. You're starting to miss having Baptiste around to keep him occupied while you go through patients. You sighed loudly not until Mauga appears behind you

You found him with wounds on his chest and torso. You turn to look at him, "What happened?"

"Nothing serious..." He grins, showing his sharpened teeth.

"Just a minor injury, eh?" You raise an eyebrow at the mercenary, crossing your arms over your chest. Mauga simply shrugs as he sits on a table.

There was another period of silence between you two, and the atmosphere seemed to tense up considerably. This time, it's you who breaks the silence. "I'm sorry that you got injured. I don't know how I should react seeing someone else getting hurt so casually. You could have died out there. And that's not the worst thing that can happen," you said sarcastically and sternly.

He chuckles. "Oh really? Tell me more." He leans closer to your face, gazing deeply into your eyes. "Ah. So that's how it is."

You glare at him angrily, but he ignores you as you continue working. "Are you seriously going to mock me for worrying about you?"

"Not at all," he replied, with a hint of sarcasm. "But there is one thing that concerns me."

"What? You're going to insult me too, aren't you?" Mauga laughs while Y/N tends his injury.

The felt of your touch sends shivers throughout his entire body. He tries hard to suppress the sudden urge to grab her hand and hold on tightly. It's becoming harder to control these urges though. He shakes his head rapidly as he pulls away from you. He looks at you with narrowed eyes. "I'm not mocking you, you know?"

Your gaze flicks briefly to his. "Hm."

There was a short silence between you two, until you began to clean a cut on one of his legs. You noticed his gaze follow every movement of your fingers. "Why are you staring at me like that?"

"I'd prefer that you didn't ask questions so frequently, Teuila."

"Teuila?" You face him. "You know, I never asked you of this... But why do you call me that?" He lets out a deep chuckle and replies. "Because you look like Teuila. It fits well, doesn't it?" He flashes you a warm smile before turning his head away again.

You shrugged of his answer, continuing your work without saying anything further, although you were extremely curious. "Teuila... What does that word mean?" There's a brief moment of silence in between the two of you once you finished cleaning up the blood staining his leg. A faint smile plays across his lips again. "I thought you were better than that."

"And you think that you're better than me?"

"Yeah," he replies smugly.

"Then... You've obviously underestimated me, don't you?" You give him a challenging smirk. He returns the smile with a smirk of his own, but he then turns serious again. His eyes narrow. "Let me enlighten you. That name means 'flower'. Do you understand what kind of flower it means?"

You gave him a blank stare. He continues to smirk, waiting for you to understand his meaning. Eventually, you sigh, putting your hands on your hips. "Do I look like I care to know?" You scoff, rolling your eyes lightly.

Mauga laughs. "Well, I guess it doesn't matter what you think of it..."

There was silence between you two for a few seconds, and you looked away with furrowed brows.

You finish patching up the mercenary, placing some bandages around him and securing them securely. "Now that I finished helping you, you're dismissed." You professionaly said after you made sure that everything was covered properly. Mauga laughs at this. "Really? Now? Just like that?" He asks mockingly.

"Yes Mauga, I don't have any other duties besides tending to your wounds. I've been doing that for quite some time now," you responded coldly.

Mauga raises an eyebrow at this. "You know, if you start beginning to care about those wounds, you might find yourself losing them. If you want me to leave your clinic quickly, then you'll have to earn my trust first, which requires some work."

You sigh heavily. Of course Mauga will insist on making things difficult for you. "I am no doctor Mauga, I cannot cure your injuries." You sarcasticly said.

"Oh I know that. But you're still willing to take the risk." He chuckled.

"You wouldn't had to waste precious time coming here in order to talk shit."

Mauga laughs at you again, grinning like a cat that ate the canary. "I wouldn't waste too much time coming here either, but I also wouldn't be able to enjoy it quite as much because you'll be gone by then," he says confidently. "Besides, you're not exactly known for your patience." You roll your eyes, turning back to the table in front of you.

"You know I've always wondered what it feels like to be your patient," Mauga mused. "To be the one receiving the attention of the most skilled medic in your battalion."

"You must be joking," you replied, you know what he meant, not wanting to think that you would ever become his patient.

"No. You know me... " He grins. You groaned. "Don't' make such assumptions, we don't know each other all that well yet."

"Yet..."

You glared at him as he laughed. "Whatever. It seems like there's no stopping you, is there? We haven't even officially met yet, and already you're acting as if you have a good relationship with me." You sighed exasperatedly, massaging the area of your forehead in irritation.

"Listen, Mauga. My job is simple, I care for my patients and treat them well. Nothing more, nothing less."

"Oh yeah? Well, maybe I'm different," he said cockily.

"How? Are you not afraid of dying?"

"No... No I'm not... I've done so much more reckless things than death." His expression suddenly shifted to an emotionless one. For a moment, it felt almost as if he wasn't looking at you anymore. Then he chuckled softly, giving you a playful wink. "But I'm no saint."

"It must be hard to admit being human." You shook your head slightly.

"Sometimes." His grin returned to his features.

You couldn't help but stare directly into his eyes for a little longer, taking in how dark they actually are.

Mauga shows a huge plastered face. His still wearing his dumb smile.

You blinked at him.

He blinked back.

You rolled your eyes. "Stop smiling so much." He continued to laugh, as you turned away from him again. Mauga stood up and stretched lazily, "I have something to attend to, I'll be seeing you later," Mauga teasingly said as he made his way towards the door. He opens it, but he glances back.

A small smirk forms on his lips.

You watch him disappear outside the door, closing it behind him with a click. Once the door closes you let out a heavy sigh, resting your back against the wall behind you. Your heart is racing a mile, a minute, both at the prospect of having finally been alone with Mauga again, and the strange feeling within you after you spent several hours alone with him.

This feeling...

It's definitely not normal.

End of part 1

Part 2- ???

[woman-loving]

I don’t identity as a “bi lesbian,” but I feel there is room for a woman to identify as both bisexual and gay/lesbian, and I don’t agree with the arguments I’ve seen against “bi lesbian” identity.

One thing that annoys me about detractors of the identity is the occasional claim that it is basically an internet phenomenon that arose within the last five years or so. Actually, women have been claiming both bisexual and lesbian identities for decades. There have constantly been debates about how bi women fit within lesbianism, lesbian identity, and lesbian community since the gay/lesbian movements have been active. This isn’t something that has ever been universally agreed upon, and there never will be universal agreement on it.

Just for reference and historical interest, I’ve compiled a few selections from articles and books, mostly from the 80s and 90s, that are by or about lesbian-identified (or gay-identified) bisexual woman, or that at least mention them. Inclusion doesn’t indicate my approval of the author’s perspective or argument; this is to provide a bit of history on the discourse.

What is a Lesbian? To me, a lesbian is a woman-oriented woman; bisexuals can be lesbians. A lesbian does not have to be exclusively woman oriented, she does not have to prove herself in bed, she does not have to hate men, she does not have to be sexually active at all times, she does not have to be a radical feminist. She does not have to like bars, like gay culture, or like being gay. When lesbians degrade other lesbians for not going to bars, not coming out, being bisexual or not sexually active, and so on, we oppress each other.

--Trish Miller, "Bisexuality," Lavender Woman, Vol 2 Issue 5, August 1973.

*

The definition of lesbian that I suggest, one that conforms to the two methodological considerations above, is the following:

5. Lesbian is a woman who has sexual and erotic-emotional ties primarily with women or who sees herself as centrally involved with a community of self-identified lesbians whose sexual and erotic-emotional ties are primarily with women; and who is herself a self-identifed lesbian. 

My definition is a sociopolitical one; that is, it attempts to include in the term lesbian the contemporary sense of lesbianism as connected with a subcultural community, many members of which are opposed to defining themselves as dependent on or subordinate to men. It defines both bisexual and celibate women as lesbians as long as they identify themselves as such and have their primary emotional identification with a community of self-defined lesbians. Furthermore, for reasons I will outline shortly, there was no lesbian community in which to ground a sense of self before the twentieth century, a fact which distinguishes the male homosexual community from the lesbian community. Finally, it is arguable that not until this particular stage in the second wave of the women’s movement and in the lesbian-feminist movement has it been politically feasible to include self-defined lesbian bisexual women into the lesbian community.

Many lesbian feminists may not agree with this inclusion. But it may be argued that to exclude lesbian bisexuals from the community on the grounds that “they give energy to men” is overly defensive at this point. After all, a strong women’s community does not have to operate on a scarcity theory of nurturant energy! On feminist principles the criterion for membership in the community should be a woman’s commitment to giving positive erotic-emotional energy to women. Whether women who give such energy to women can also give energy to individual men (friends, fathers, sons, lovers) is not the community’s concern.

--Ann Ferguson, “Patriarchy, Sexual Identity, and the Sexual Revolution,” Signs, Autumn 1981.

*

Individuals who came together a month ago to discuss bisexuality and its relationship to radical feminism decided recently to begin a serious, regular study group on human sexuality and its social/political/psychological manifestations in our culture.

There are eight of us in the group. For all, understanding bisexuality, both in our own lives and and in our society, is a primary goal. To this end, we decided on a format of readings and discussion, with a facilitator for each meeting, that would bring us through the range of sexual options available in the United States today, from male-identified heterosexuality to lesbianism, to a final informed examination of bisexuality in the context of all that we had learned. Throughout our exploration, feminism will provide both a point of departure, and a point of return.

We started by trying to define some terms, specifically "feminism," "gay-identified bisexual," and "bisexual". Alot of us were amazed to see how many different interpretations each term, especially "gay-identified," could have. Is someone "gay-identified" because they devote a majority of their time, energy and emotion to the gay community? Or does an individual's radical critique of heterosexuality make them "gay-identified"? And does "gay-identified" also imply "women-identified"? Some people felt that one could be gay-identified, and still not be woman-identified. And exactly how many Meg Christian concerts make you "lesbian-identified"?

We didn't reach any conclusions, but had fun realizing that being bisexuals, we are dealing with a whole realm of experiences that can be classified in any number of different ways; and that the variety of possible bisexual lifestyles is as varied as the women who are in the Network.

--Barb H, “Study Group,” BBWN, Vol. 2 No. 4, July-Aug 1984

*

I recognize that homophobia is at the root of biphobia. I came to lesbianism long before my sexuality was clear to me. I lived an open lesbian lifestyle for four years. I cannot deny the importance of this experience, nor do I want to. For me lesbian identity is more than, and/or in addition to sexuality; it is a political awareness which bisexuality doesn't altar or detract from. 10 years ago when I left my husband and full-time role of motherhood, it didn't make me less conscious of what being a mother means. In fact, it gave me a deeper understanding. I am still a mother. That experience cannot be taken away from me. In much the same way, my lesbian awareness isn't lost now that I claim my bisexuality. When I realized my woman-loving-woman feelings, and came out as a lesbian, I had no heterosexual privilege; yet there were important males in my life, including a son. I am bisexual because it's real for me, not in order to acquire or flaunt the privilege that is inherent in being with men. My political consciousness is lesbian but my lifestyle is bisexual. If I keep myself quiet for another's sense of pride and liberation, it is at the cost of my own which isn't healthy--emotionally, politically or medically. Not only is it unhealthy, it's ineffective.

Since I have come out I have triggered many lesbians to blurt in whispered confidence--"I have a man in the closet. You're brave to be so open. What am I going to do?" These are not easy times. AIDS has given biphobia free reign in the lesbian community (and admittedly with much less destructive effect than how AIDS is fueling homophobia in society at large), it is all right to trash bisexuals, not to trust us for fear of AIDS. Bisexuals are untouchable to some lesbians.

We have to deal with oppression in a constructive way or we will be factionalized forever. Time is running out. We have to see the whole and the part we play in it. Forming family communities with people who share your sexual identity is important, but trashing is nonproductive. The sexual choices we make are equally valid for our individual experiences. AIDS is not a gay disease; it is a human tragedy, a plague that doesn't recognize boundaries. I urge bisexuals to take a political stand, and to become a visible, viable energy force. It is important and timely to open this dialogue in each of our communities. Nobody belongs in the closet. The only way to get a sense of "our" community is for us to begin to speak out and identify ourselves. When we verify the connections and the networks of our oppression, we build a unity that avoids the, "I'm more oppressed than you" syndrome

--Lani Kaahumanu, “Bisexuality & Discrimination,” BBWN Vol. 3, No. 6, Dec 1985-Jan 1986; Reprinted from the 1985 Gay Pride March magazine, San Francisco

*

What makes the Third Annual Northeast Conference on Bisexuality what it is? The breakfasts and dinners--the entertainment--the excitement of meeting others who feel like family. My first event of the conference was stumbling onto a cocktail party just around the corner from the Registration Desk, which turned out to be part of the Woman's History Week! A bit embarrassing after greeting many people with wine glasses in hand, asking them how they heard about the bisexuality conference!

I'll skip now to describe my experiences at the lesbian-identified affinity group and the two workshops I attended. Why do women who identify as lesbians go to a bisexuality conference? There were about 10 of us in the room, each with a different answer. Most of our relationships at the present time were with women; after that the similarity ended. One woman had affairs with men when not seriously involved with women. Another, in a non-monogamous long-term lesbian relationship, had recently begun a sexual involvement with a man. one woman, now involved with a bisexual woman, was here to discuss her feelings about the situation. Some of us had led exclusively lesbian lives for a number of years and were wondering if we'd closed off important parts of ourselves. Whether or not we would act on our sexual attractions for men, acknowledging them were important to us.

Our personal herstories contributed to our diverse opinions. For some, coming out was relaxed and easy and relationships with women refreshingly egalitarian. Others found sexual awakening and coming out difficult, and lesbian relationships fraught with many of the same difficulties as straight ones. We also discussed reasons lesbians don't accept bisexual women, such as fear that she'd leave for a man or desire to preserved woman-only space. We questioned the reality of "heterosexual privilege," wondering whether any women could really have it. We discussed the sorrows in our lives, such as family histories of alcoholism, incest or physical abuse, and the joys of our relationships, our work and our lives.

--Stacie, “Lesbian-identified Affinity Group Workshops: Lesbian Sexuality & Politics of Sexuality,” BBWN, Vol. 4, No. 2, April-May 1986

*

[Robyn Ochs]: What is your current sexual identity?

[Betty Aubut]: I call myself a "bisexual lesbian." I will always politically identify as bisexual, which to me means opposing restrictive categories. Some days I feel real separatist, and other days I feel that I want to be involved with men. Being bisexual to me means that I see men and women whom I'm attracted to. A man would have to be very special for me to want to get involved with him but I will fight for bisexual rights whether or not I'm sleeping with men. I see the bisexual community and movement as a very important bridge between gays, lesbian and straights. As long as gays and lesbians are considered completely 'other' from the mainstream, we'll never have any power. I consider myself gay. I think bisexuals are gay and gay liberation is our liberation. I don't consider myself 100% straight and 100% gay; I am 100% gay. That doesn't mean I won't sleep with a man every now and then--some lesbians do that. I never used to identify as lesbian out of respect for women who made the lifelong choice never to sleep with men, but then I realized that was a lot of bullshit. Calling yourself lesbian does not necessarily mean you have made that lifelong decision. Now I mostly identify as a lesbian--so I call myself a bisexual lesbian. I don't sleep with men right now, but I have male friends whom I spend time with and cuddle with. I've even become socially involved with some of the men from the men's network. I'm proud of where I am now because it's been so hard for me. People who have known me for a long time can't believe the change.

--Robyn Ochs, “Bi of the Month: Betty Aubut,” Bi Women Vol. 5, No. 2, April-May, 1987

*

Sharon Sumpter is a bisexual lesbian activist and psychotherapist who works with women survivors of abuse, institutionalization and sexual oppression. Her book-in-progress, In Pieces, is dedicated to opening the closet doors for former "mental patients." "I went into my work to undo the criminal things that were done to me and that I saw done to other women." She thanks Deena Metzger and Asherah for this, her first published work.

--Contributors' Notes, Sinister Wisdom, Issue 36, Winter 1988/89

*

Representatives of lesbian-feminist separatism may feel singled out as special targets of our anger and distress. To the extent that this is true, the seeds of anger lie in lesbian separatism as a politic: In this reading of feminism, specific sex acts take on politicized meaning. These are said to have consequences for the consciousness of the person performing them. Lesbian feminism is arguably the most proscriptive gay or lesbian politic, generating in its adherents the greatest tendency to judge others' (especially sexual) behavior. Gay men, for example, seem more likely to cite personal antipathy or simple stereotypes about bisexuals as a source of their chagrin. A great many bisexual women, particularly those who are feminist and lesbian-identified, have felt both personally and politically rejected and judged by the separatist sisters. Even those with no such experience may feel wary having heard of other bisexual women's stories. No one like to feel attacked, even politically.

----Carol A. Queen, "Strangers at Home: Bisexuals in the queer movement," Out/Look, Vol. 4, Issue 4 (16), Spring 1992

*

Closer to Home successfully deals with these and other problems of self-identification. As most of the writers are "lesbian-identified bisexuals" (one of several labels used for the sake of convenience), the definition of lesbianism is also reevaluated. Is a lesbian a woman who relates emotionally and erotically with women or a woman who does not relate emotionally and erotically with men? Must a woman fit both criteria to be considered a lesbian?

The "Principles and Practice" section expands these main course theories of identity with side dishes of memories and personal feelings--feelings of not being queer enough; of breaking all the rules, even the gay rules; of being dissatisfied with the waste of energy from political infighting. It's odd for lesbian-identified bi's to find themselves viewed as politically incorrect. It's maddening to have one's past feminist work invalidated by the inclusion of a man (or men) in one's life. It's frustrating to find oneself faced with a choice of being honest or potentially losing support of women's groups. It's confusing to work for the freedom to come out of one closet only to be asked to stay in another. As Rebecca Shuster write:

"If we choose a lesbian identity, we are subject to systematic oppression and internalize that oppression in a package that includes marginality; invisibility; isolation...; and countercultural rules about how to relate to women and men. If we choose a bisexual identity, we are subject to systematic oppression and internalize that oppression in a package deal that include a feeling of not belonging or having a home; defensiveness; isolation...; and countercultural rules about how to relate to women and men. Precisely because bisexuality represents freedom of choice, society ensures that the identity comes with its own package of mistreatment and constraints."

----Beth Herrick, "Bisexual Women Pushing the Limits," Sojourner, Vol. 18, Issue 10, June 1993

*

The first step is to move toward building alliances within our bisexual communities. Many communities are united by a commonality of the oppression. This is not so in our community, partly because of the different ways people identify as bisexual: gay-identified, queer-identified, lesbian-identified, or heterosexual-identified. Some people are bisexual in an affectional manner only; some are bisexual both affectionally and sexually; and some are bisexual only sexually. Since there are so many ways to express our bisexuality, the first step toward alliance-building is to work internally to accept all members of our own community. It is imperative that we build alliances across our own differences; otherwise, alliance-building will fail. Acceptance of the diversity of bisexual labels within our community will allow us to pursue alliance-building with decisive strength in the heterosexual community and what many of us consider our own lesbian/gay community.[3]

--Brenda Blasingame, "Power and Privilege Beyond the Invisible Fence, in  Bisexual Politics: Theories, Queries, and Visions, 1995

*

Personally, I am unable to separate out the various ways that I am oppressed (as a woman, as an African American, as a bisexual lesbian, as an impoverished single mother) and say that one oppression is worse than the other, or that I desire one form of liberation more than another. I do not want to experience threats to my life, my child custody, or my job security because of racism or homophobia. I don't want to be oppressed for any reason!!!

--Dajenya, "Which Part of Me Deserves to Be Free?," in Bisexual Politics: Theories, Queries, & Visions, ed. Naomi Tucker, 1995

*

A good deal of criticism has been written about heterosexuals who are surprised when they find out the true sexual orientation of someone who they didn't think "looked gay." These criticism assert what is of course true--that there is no such thing as a gay or lesbian "look," since of course, everyone who is gay, lesbian or bisexual, looks that way.

Unfortunately, many of my experiences as a lesbian-identified bisexual woman have said to me that having an appearance or demeanor that diverges from the expected means I will not be accepted as truly belonging in the lesbian community. Despite my attendance at gay pride parade, dollars spent at gay resorts and in support of gay causes, and numerous attempts to participate in gay and/or lesbian groups and volunteer events, I have often felt unaccepted by this community.

--Amy Wyeth, "Don't Assume Anything," Bi Women Vol. 13, No. 4, Aug/Sept 1995

*

Joan Tollifson relays her struggle to make sense of her life and her spiritual awakening in Bare-Bones Meditation. Born with only one hand, she grew up feeling different, found identity and purpose as a bisexual lesbian and a disability rights activist, but struggled with drug and alcohol addiction. She first embraced Zen Buddhism then a very bare-bones form of spirituality that has no form. This exuberant and amazing testament is for the many people who don't fit into the conventional molds of existing religious traditions.

--"And on Publisher's Row," complied by Jenn Tust, Feminist Bookstore News, Vol. 19, Issue 4, Nov-Dec 1996

[mouxesaint]

"Kisses that start on her fingers and run down her arm, finally end on her lips"

The night was turning out to be really cold, although they took refuge inside a cave and lit a fire to keep warm, the chills ran through their body, they could hear the wind roaring outside, their blue gaze went to their companion who had snuggled into his sleeping bag, previously Nebra would never have consented to sleep on the ground in the company of a commoner like him, however the woman's defenses were diminishing as they were forced to spend time together during missions, Also adding the fact that he was the one who participated in the invasion of the elves along with his brothers to save them, the redhead noticed that despite the fact that the blankets in which he was wrapped were of better quality than the pitiful pieces of cloth that they were his he could see her trembling, he shouldn't feel sorry for a member of royalty but she was awakening feelings in him that he didn't expect. He watched her for a few more minutes, tightening the blanket with which she was covering herself, the winter clothes with which she went on the mission were comfortable, she could probably tolerate the weather for some time with that alone, sighing because her mind was torn between caring or not from the woman, finally her emotional self won the argument and got up to cover her with the sheet. Nebra moved slightly without waking up. Zora noticed a small detail that she decided to keep very deep in her mind, she would remember to tell her in another less dangerous moment, to make fun of her a little, because she had just discovered for the first time despite all the hours they shared that Nebra Silva he had a habit of sucking his thumb when sleeping. She was so curled up that it was hard to notice, maybe she got used to sleeping in that position to keep it a secret. If he looked at her carefully and his eyes narrowed he would say that she was beautiful, with her old woman hair, pale skin and pink eyes, the same tone as her younger sister, Noelle was among the few people of royalty together With Mimosa that she tolerated, she was an outcast like all the squad members, so despite her attempts to maintain her royal protocol, I observe her taking care of Vanessa, accompanying Charmy during her meals or simply listening to Gauche talk about her sister. less. Sigh reaching out his hand to remove some of the hair that fell on his face, he stirred on contact and then just kept sleeping, he was so tempted to place one of his stink bugs right now, but he knew it would kill him when he woke up, Zora thought In the previous times that they had deep, heart-to-heart conversations, at first he did not like it, he did not want to know the emotional dramas he might have, nor did he want him to know about the tragedy of his life, to know that they had both lost a father and suffered For that reason, it gave him a more human aspect, more difficult to hate, the woman in front of him was really so insecure hidden behind all his proud act that it generated curiosity, and curiosity led to interest. - Zora? He - He asked, opening his eyes sleepy, luckily he didn't comment on him staring at her - Are we going to change the shift? - You can keep sleeping. - Where did you hide it? - What thing? - The nasty bug. You never let me sleep longer than my share. - She said with an accusing tone that managed to make him laugh, because of this she honestly smiled as she lowered her mask, since the time she asked him to take it off it became a custom to point out the seriousness of her about a affair. - It offends me that you doubt my good will. - Nebra raised an eyebrow stubbornly - I did not hide any bedbugs, also they do not survive in this cold. - I raise both hands as a sign of peace. - It's fine. She - she gave in clinging to the shivering of cold, due to her mistrust she did not realize that there was an extra blanket covering her, now that she realized she hesitated a moment before covering herself. Zora decided to try her luck, she extended her hand to take hers, she did not withdraw it abruptly but remained expectant, her thumb gently caressing her back before bringing it to her lips, kissing her fingers and the palm slowly always keeping their gazes united. Nebra blushed feeling her heart beat faster with each kiss, taking advantage of the luck that the redhead was having, he ventured to raise his lips over his skin, he heard the small gasp of surprise from the woman so he paused, hoping that she retract, withdraw his hand or slap him, none of those things happened.

Nebra was holding her breath with her face flushed, her pink irises had a brilliance full of curiosity and emotion that was impossible to hide, Zora smiled, her lips were resting quickly on the skin of her arm, rising without stopping to close her eyes to concentrate on his skin under his, when he opened his eyelids again it was inches from his face, he knew there was a certain chemistry between them. - Nebra? I do not answer, however, he licked his lips innocently while his pink irises were fixed on hers, despite the temptation he backed away, dropping into the position he had at the beginning without letting go of his hand, he brought it back to his lips, he was delighted with the pleasure of feeling his skin and awakening emotions in her, but he considered that it was too fast, if he took a wrong step she would probably hate him. - Kiss Me. - I order. - Excuse? He - He questioned surprised, his face reddened even more if possible. - Did you hear me. Zora thought that that image was adorable, she approached slowly giving him the opportunity to retract at any moment, once they could feel the other's breathing, he saw her close her eyelids, a slight smile formed on her lips before leaving a chaste kiss, Quick and playful, he quickly moved to lay another one on his longer lasting cheek. - Are you sure you're awake? - I'm awake. He - He murmured moving her body to support her forehead on her shoulder. I caress his back with clumsy movements, waiting for the realization of his actions to come to his mind, he has just kissed a princess of the kingdom, this went against everything he believed, he heard an unintelligible murmur so he had to ask him to repeat it . - I said I like you. That I did not expect. A lie, he was fully aware of the mutual attraction they had in addition to fate he liked drama, he just had to see the way in which Noelle and Asta danced in anonymity so as not to cause a scandal, it would seem that the Silva Family was determined to mix with commoners if her two female members were related to people of her categories, it would be difficult, especially for her as the second daughter of the family and since they did not consider her a disgrace or a disappointment like Noelle. The royalty would not be surprised if the teenager brought a commoner like her partner, they expected nothing of her. - I like you to. - He confessed, adjusting himself to her to hug her, after squeezing her forcefully, he separated her from her body, adjusted her sheets with kindness and moved away from her - He goes back to sleep. - Nebra did not understand the outcome of the situation very well, her feelings were reciprocated - It would be best if we talk about this another time, I do not intend to commit you at this time. - Get engaged? -I know what this - She indicated, pointing to the space between them - It can be harmful for you, if you want to go on and see where this takes us, I'll be happy to do it. But if you are not willing to risk it, I will also respect it. He remained silent for a few minutes while extending his hand in his direction, Zora raised an eyebrow with curiosity taking it between hers when she saw him make a slight insinuating movement, kissing her watching how she lay down without letting go, once under the sheets she closed her eyes. - I'm willing to move on. It is the first time that I feel like my heart is moved to see someone, even if we argue or fight you end up protecting me, it is the first time that they kiss me. - Her cheeks reddened - I want to continue discovering this. - In agreement. - Zora smiled. She was stubbornly silent after that, fell asleep a few minutes later when she could see her breathing deepen, she kept her hands connected to hers unable to let go, sighed bringing her free hand to the head of her. What kind of trouble had she just gotten into?

[loquaciousquark]

I’m not very good at keeping up with life updates. I don’t know why! I never have been!

Carol moved out August 9th, about a week extra over the original two months we’d agreed on. She got an apartment about five minutes away, which is about 40 minutes from her job. I recommended getting an apartment closer to her job to ease the commute, but she said she strongly preferred being near to her friends and the city center. (She also had the option of a $650/mo lease for a year or $1100/mo for a six month lease at this complex, and opted for the shorter lease even though she couldn’t afford the $1100. She also insisted on a two bed 1.5 bath apartment instead of a much cheaper one bed one bath, and I don’t know why. Her financial choices continue to bewilder me.)

I helped her move, because she has a number of physical disabilities and a fairly total inability to accurately predict the scope of a job like this. She insisted to me multiple times that all she was picking up from her estranged mother’s home was a few books, a desk, a chair, and a small round end table. She came back with a fifteen foot Uhaul packed top to bottom with dozens of pieces of (often very heavy) furniture, tubs upon tubs upon tubs of books (not small boxes, like 40 gallon tubs immobile with books) and a lot of...I don’t know how to describe it.

Honestly, it reminded me of a hoarder’s home from those TLC shows. She had so much stuff, and almost all of it was...garbage. Like, stained, discolored, moldy, dirty, dusty furniture and blankets and clothes that were covered in mouse droppings and bird crap. An ancient armchair that she called “antique” but was made of very cheap very damaged veneered pressed wood and whose upholstery was of an indeterminate color because of how stained it was. A “display piece” of an old suitcase she picked up in some thrift store that was locked shut with what felt like twenty pounds of bricks inside, but the outside wasn’t even attractive - just an ugly brown box with no care or craftwork that was scratched and torn and stained with mouse poop. It honestly made me uneasy to touch it, and she was putting it in her apartment to use.

I don’t know how she thought she was going to be able to get all of this stuff down the half-flight of stairs to her apartment by herself. I helped her unload for four hours before I had another obligation, then came back after that finished for another hour or two of unloading to get it in her apartment securely. It was...very tiring, but also very exhilarating to be physically closing that chapter as well as mentally. I don’t intend to do it again.

--

My job (professor) started back in person on a regular basis the following week in August. We’ve now been in class for almost two months and no students that I directly interact with (my 46ish 2nd year students) have had any exposures or at risk scenarios. A small handful of 3rd and 4th years have had exposures, and I think one student actually tested positive, but none of the exposures or positive results were from our clinic or labs; they were all from community transmission (wife/husband/child/roommate caught it from somewhere else, student had to quarantine).

I have been almost draconian with my 2nd years about the thin line we’re walking in being allowed to have even our minimal, limited in-person labs, and have warned them that if we have an exposure breach in our clinic, there is zero chance they graduate on time in a few years. They seem to be taking it extremely seriously, which I like a lot. All students, staff, and faculty are given new surgical masks daily, and everyone who interacts with patients gets a new n95 mask every 10 days. We have decontamination stations throughout the building, temperature guns, digital “passports” that they have to update daily to be allowed on campus, and plenty of spray bottles with high level disinfectant for surfaces and hands. It’s honestly as safe as we can make it, and I feel we’ve hit a good balance between staying safe and getting them actually trained on real human beings.

That said, we are having more students than I’ve ever had fail exams and practicals across the board, and I honestly think it’s an artifact of the remote lectures (all lectures are remote unless specified for particular reasons, and then they only take place in distanceable classrooms, which are at max like 70% of the class). God knows I wouldn’t have learned as well at home - I’d have been on my phone or playing games and kind of half listening in the background, and if nothing else this has made me more of a proponent of mandatory attendance once it’s safe again to do so, because the drop I’m seeing is almost precipitous. Either this class is unusually full of students incapable of completing the program, or COVID’s striking again. I’m pretty sure it’s the latter.

On the other hand, we’re FINALLY making up the Injections course material that got stopped dead in spring, and the first run of it went very well last Saturday. I unequivocally resent that I have to give up an entire Saturday to do so (and will have to do so thrice more to get all the students done this semester), but it’s at least one chunk of incompletes that are now passes (and in fact, mostly As).

We just got the notification that hybrid courses will continue through spring. It’s so exhausting. We can do it safely, and we are, but it’s so hard.

--

Went to get a drink last night before bed and noticed the tea was a little warm. Went to grab some ice cubes from the freezer and discovered the ice cube tray was full of water, and the chocolate ice cream in the door had melted and spread across the entire unit.

Managed to get a repair guy out this afternoon, who charged $228 to replace the ...relay overload array capacitor, or something. He showed me what it was--a little black and white box that he said was bottom of the barrel cheap from China, which I fully believe, and installed a new one then and there while I had a remote test review with a student over Zoom. I put on headphones for her privacy, but she cried several times. It’s usually a pretty rough awakening when students who never had to study in college realize how difficult this program is and the study time required to pass, let alone succeed.

Anyway, the freezer’s chucking out cold air like it was made for it, and the fridge seems to be slowly working its way back down. Had to throw out everything from the freezer (chicken, steak, ground beef, bacon, veggies, frozen meals--and some pizza rolls) and I’m not looking forward to the grocery bill it’ll take to restock the fridge either, but at least it seems to be functioning again.

I just checked; the freezer’s made six ice cubes in the last three hours. I’ve put them all in my tea to celebrate.

--

Edit: just checked again and the fridge is slowly cooling off, thank goodness! Of course, I somehow managed to fall down the four stairs of the hall between here and there and bruise the royal bejeezus out of both hips and somehow the inside of my left foot, so I’m ordering in for dinner, because nuts to that.

[snowwhitelass]

I’m pleased to be here today to discuss who I’ll be supporting for president, and why.

It was the honor of my life to represent my state, Arizona — my family’s home — in the United States House and Senate for eighteen years. I am a conservative. I’ve always felt that my conservative beliefs and values were best expressed in the Republican Party. I was a Republican long before the president ever called himself one, and I will be a Republican long after identifying as such is no longer useful to him. Principle does not go in and out of fashion, does not chase ratings, or play to the base, or care too much about polls. And principle is the provenance of no one party. That is one of the things I am here to talk about today.

The other thing I am here to talk about is the future — both of my party, but more importantly, the future of our country.

I was raised on a cattle ranch in Northern Arizona. Goldwater country. When I was a kid, the Republican Party under President Reagan was brimming with ideas, full of purpose and principle. It was coherent, and inspiring, and idealistic. So much so that it awakened the imagination of a kid from the town of Snowflake, and a whole generation of other kids just like him. Made us think big thoughts, and of our place in the world, and of what it meant to be an American in America, the shining city on a hill.

With Reagan, a conservative’s vision of America as the indispensable nation was benevolent and big-hearted, a beacon to the striver and to the subjugated and those locked behind an ideological wall that divided the world into free and oppressed. It was morning in Reagan’s America. It wasn’t perfect, but it was always getting better. We were the sum of our goodness, not our gripes — of our resolve, not our resentments.

I got into public service believing that for our politics to be healthy, the American government needed people who believed as I do, but also people who believed differently from me. This has become somewhat of a novel idea. But it is the genius of our founders that the Constitution forces compromise. Governing is hard. Democracy is hard. Decency shouldn’t be that hard, but apparently it is. You know what’s easy? Name calling. Demagoguery. The politics of vengeance is easy. Dehumanization requires very little talent.

By raging at each other, our minds vacant of reason and reeling with ill-will and tinfoil hat conspiracy theories, we have given in to the horrible tribal impulse to first mistake our opponents for our enemies… then become seized with the conviction that we must destroy that enemy… seemingly oblivious to the fact that not only are we not enemies, we are each vital organs in the same body.

It’s as if in order to save itself, your brain decided to destroy your heart. That’s about the level of care we are currently bringing to the proceedings. There is a sickness in our system, and we have infected the whole country with it.

We’re all old enough to remember when we elected presidents who spoke to our highest ideals and aspirations as a nation, not to our darkest dystopian fears. I can remember when, once an election was settled, a new president would reach out a hand to those who had opposed him, and pledge to do right by all Americans, not just those who were loyal to him.

That’s the way presidents once sought to lead and govern. In fact, it is the way every other president in the modern era, Republican or Democrat, tried to conduct himself in office. Each possessed a keen awareness that a president’s principal role is to serve not himself or his interests or the interests of his clan, but the people of the United States. That was once the American way.

Those of us of a certain age in this country have also had the rare good fortune of growing up and into adulthood not having to think too much about the consequences of our votes — or even whether we vote at all in a given election.

For our entire lives, through some very fractious political periods, we have taken steady self-governance for granted, and that is a luxury that so many of our fellow human beings living in other countries have never had for a single day of their lives.

But the story of the past 3 ½ years is the story of the power that we vest in the presidency, and the consequences when a president does not use that power well. And these times prove the folly of taking anything for granted.

In 2016, one candidate running for the Republican nomination described our current President as a “chaos candidate” and if elected he would be a “chaos president.” Can anyone now seriously argue against this proposition?

Of course, in 2016 the President was a private citizen, and thus was unaccountable for the chaos he caused. And these traits of the man who would become the standard bearer of my party were bad enough when exhibited by a mere candidate for president.

In 2016, it was bad enough when for months in advance of the election, the Republican nominee for president claimed falsely that the coming election would be rigged. Now, as president of the United States, he has said, and I quote: “The only way we’re going to lose this election is if the election is rigged.” What kind of president talks like that? What kind of American leader undermines confidence in elections in his own country, as part of his strategy to hold power? This is extraordinarily dangerous to a free society and it stands to inflict lasting damage to our democracy.

It was bad enough when as a candidate he attacked a federal judge because of his heritage, saying that Judge Gonzalo Curiel couldn’t preside fairly over a certain case because Curiel’s parents were from Mexico. As President, he has only intensified his attack on judges. He has interfered in cases involving his friends and threatened jail for his opponents, demonstrating how little he knows or appreciates about the independent administration of justice in America.

In 2016, it was bad enough for a mere candidate for president to sweet talk the Russian dictator, calling Vladimir Putin a “strong leader for his people,” as if “his people” had a say in the matter. Watching that man as president stand with Putin at Helsinki and take the dictator’s side, defying his own intelligence community and denying the ongoing Russian attacks on our elections — was shocking and appalling. In that moment, and in so many other inexplicable moments of deference to dictators, a president of the United States degraded his office and diminished America’s role as leader of the free world.

It was bad enough in 2016 when as a candidate he resorted to calling his opponents childish names. That behavior in a president — which has only gotten worse, is an embarrassment to the office. Do any of us want our children to emulate this behavior?

I could go on, but the litany is all too familiar. It is apparent by now that the president’s behavior has not and will not change, whatever hopes we Republicans might have entertained about the office changing the man.

Some of my conservative friends will say, yes, we don’t like his behavior, but he governs as a conservative. Here, today, I will say to my fellow conservatives: Whatever else you might call the behavior I have just described, it is most assuredly not conservative. Indifference to the truth or to the careful stewardship of the institutions of American liberty is not conservative. Disregard for the separation of powers — the centerpiece of our constitutional system — is not conservative. Governing by tweet is not conservative. It’s not even governing.

And to the refrain — Well, it’s all about the Supreme Court, I say: To fall back on Supreme Court appointments as the last remnant by which we define a once vibrant conservative movement should offer little solace to conservatives.

Three conservative principles have defined and animated the Republican Party over the past several decades. A belief in limited government, a commitment to free trade, and a recognition that strong American leadership around the globe makes America a more secure nation and the world a better place.

So, how are we doing with these principles?

Well, we were running trillion-dollar deficits even before the coronavirus hit us. We have destroyed foreign markets for our goods and services. We have threatened security agreements that have kept the peace for nearly three quarters of a century. We have offended allies who we will desperately need to face China and other long-term threats to our security and prosperity. For no good reason.

Can any of us stand here today and claim that our party has remained faithful to conservative principles during the President’s time in office? No, we cannot.

If we are honest, there is less of a conservative case to be made for reelecting the President than there is a blatant appeal for more rank tribalism. And further division. And more willful amnesia in the face of more outlandish presidential behavior.

I cannot and will not be a part of that. There simply is no future in it. To my fellow Republicans who, like me, believe in the power of conservative ideas — ask yourself: Will we be in a better position to make a conservative case for governing after four more years of this administration? I think we all know the answer.

So here we are today. During the 2016 election, given what I had already seen during the campaign, I knew I could not vote for the President. Like many of my colleagues, I chose to vote for a third-party candidate. Today, given what we have experienced over the past four years, it is not enough to just to register our disapproval of the President. We need to elect someone else in his place, someone who will stop the chaos and reverse the damage.

Putting country over party has a noble history here in Arizona. In 1992, Mr. Republican, Barry Goldwater, endorsed a Democrat running for Congress over the Republican he felt would not represent the party well. Goldwater hadn’t traded in his conservative credentials. Far from it. He simply believed, in that case, that the conservative cause would be better served over the long term if the Democrat prevailed.

And that is what I believe today, in this election. And that is what a growing number of Republicans believe and are declaring today as well.

I have never before voted for a Democrat for president. But I’ve been asked many times over the past four years if I, as a conservative, could vote for a Democrat for President. “Sure,” has been my ready answer, “if he or she were a Joe Biden-kinda-Democrat.

Well, the Democratic Party just nominated a Joe Biden-kinda-Democrat, whom I am confident will approach his constitutional role with the reverence and dignity it deserves. I know that he will reach across the aisle, because that’s what he’s done his entire career.

After the turmoil of the past four years, we need a president who unifies rather than divides.

We need a president who prefers teamwork to tribalism.

We need a president who summons our better angels, not a president who appeals to our baser instincts.

That’s why we need Joe Biden.

If we have learned anything over the past four years, it is that character matters. Decency matters. Civility never goes out of style. And we should expect our president to exhibit these virtues.

I have known Vice President Biden for two decades now. I served with him in Congress for much of that time. He is a good and decent man. I haven’t always agreed with him, and there will be many policies on which we will disagree in the future, and that’s okay. The steadiness of leadership, and the health and survival of our democracy — those things far supersede any policy issues on which we might disagree.

And this much I know: With Joe Biden as president, we will be able to preserve the civic space wherein Republicans and Democrats can go back to merely disagreeing about issues of policy, without fear of revenge or reprisal.

That day cannot come soon enough.

And so, it is because of my conservatism, and because of my belief in the Constitution, and in the separation of power, and because I am gravely concerned about the conduct and behavior of our current president that I stand here today — proudly and wholeheartedly — to endorse Joe Biden to be our next president of the United States of America.

America’s best days are ahead. Go Joe.

Thank you very much.

27 Prominent Republicans endorse Joe Biden for President.

[opheliacassiopea]

CHAPTER 10.

TW: Mentions of a weapon.

Landing back in Quantico that evening was a welcome feeling, the few hours of sleep you managed to get on the plane making little difference in rejuvenating your body and you were practically on auto-pilot for the short twenty-five minute drive back to your apartment. Typing in your alarm code, you quickly tidy your things away, securing your weapon and your credentials. It might seem odd to start tidying your apartment when your body is aching all over, and you’re practically dead on your feet, but it calms you, tethers you to some form of normalcy. So you cleaned the small amount of mess you’d left in your rush to get to work once you’d gotten the call to come in, you weren’t really a messy person anyway so it didn’t take long. Apartment cleaned, you set about fixing yourself dinner and hopping into the shower, turning the water to the highest temperature, the hot water bringing you comfort, easing your sore shoulder and side as you wash away the stress of the last few days.

Despite how tired you are, you fear that sleep won’t come to you easily, you had a lot to think about, your mind still focused on the case that technically still wasn’t over as the paperwork hadn’t been completed, and of course you couldn’t help but think of Hotch, what had happened between the two of you. Realistically you knew nothing would come of it, but that didn’t mean you could suddenly stop thinking about it altogether, it was incredibly good sex after all, and the sweet moments afterwards were something you couldn’t forget any time soon. Clambering into bed and getting comfortable under the covers, you find that sleep washes over you quickly, leading you into a dreamworld. Many hours later you awaken from a peaceful sleep the next morning, feeling well rested and slightly less sore than the day before and decide to make the most of your morning off, choosing to change the bedsheets and open all the windows to let in some fresh air. Along with the rest of the team, you were having to head into the office later that afternoon to fill out the paperwork for the recent case in Bend. 

Much like your appearance, you look pride in your apartment looking the very best it could be, and much like your appearance, your apartment truly resembled you too. It was a fairly decent sized apartment, the reasonably sized living room decked out with fashionable, yet vintage looking sofas and chairs that were situated around the antique coffee table that faced toward the TV. Arguably the best part of the living room was that in the cupboards of the small coffee table, was a small projector that allowed you to play some of your favourite films, or productions of your favourite books and it was something you often did on your days off. Stacks of books, plants and knickknacks lined the shelves that covered many of the walls, all arranged to look neat and tidy, rather than cluttered. The back corner of the room was home to your record player and cart of vinyl's, next to your beautiful wooden piano, plants and candles covering the top. There were many smaller lamps dotted around on the side tables throughout the room, small trails of fairy lights used to accentuate certain accessories.

The back wall of your bedroom was painted in your favourite colour, a deep forest green, your bed placed directly in front of it whilst the rest of the walls were exposed brick, which was the main reason you’d fallen in love with this particular apartment. There was a decent sized wardrobe along with a full length mirror, chest of draws and a small vanity, all home to strategically placed plants, accessories and yet more fairy lights to make the room warm and inviting. You used the smaller box room at the end of the hallway as an office so had decided to keep the colour scheme fairly neutral since it also doubled as a spare room, but was still filled with yet more books and little knickknacks that you absolutely adored and truly made your apartment feel like home and the walls were adorned with your various achievements. Your bathroom could be described as a jungle, multiple plants lived on the window and hung down from the ceiling in macramé pots, loving that it made the room feel more open. The kitchen was relatively simple, a decent sized dining table with benches and chairs always sporting fresh flowers in the middle and the windowsill lined with various cookbooks you’d yet to even open. In short, you loved your apartment, it was your sanctuary, where you felt safest and you couldn’t help but feel a sense of pride when it came to your home.

Filling the rest of your morning with errands and odd jobs like laundry and food shopping, your morning off scurries by in a hurry and you’re soon headed back to Quantico, ready to speed through the necessary paperwork and potentially catch up on any other administrative tasks you needed to complete. The bullpen is relatively quiet upon your arrival and as you walk through the glass doors, you can already see Reid halfway done with whatever he’s working on, smiling to yourself you stop by the breakroom to grab yourself a tea. 

“I’m surprised that you’re here on time, you looked dead on your feet yesterday” Prentiss greets you as you enter, handing you your mug from the cupboard.

“How charming of you” you rebuke, swatting her on the shoulder as you take the mug. “I feel way better after a decent night's sleep” you tell her as you finish making your drink.

Sensing she wants to say something you turn to face her as she begins to speak up. “That case, I know it was your first of its kind and it was pretty intense, I just want to check in with you”. Concern was apparent in all of her features and as always you appreciated how the team looked out for you, for each other.

“Seriously, I’m fine, all good I promise. Not looking forward to sorting out this paperwork, the reports are gonna be much more complicated, and with that being said, we better get a move on” you say as you exit the breakroom and head over to your desk, freshly made tea in hand. 

After a couple of hours of completing various forms and case reports, you begin to bring the report you were working on to a close and as you came to the end of the sentence you were writing, you lean back and flick your gaze to Hotch’s office to find that he was already looking at you. Sending him a small smile, which he returns immediately, you dip your head down and continue working the day away, offering to help JJ with some of her extra case consults.

Finally the weekend rolls around and you’re buzzing with excitement, once a month the team meets for breakfast in a local diner and if you’re being honest, it’s one of your favourite pastimes with the team. It’s laidback, it’s easy and you relish in the simplicity of it. It’s not even been ten minutes since you’ve all sat down at one of the large round booths at the back of the diner, conversation flowing; Spencer telling Emily and JJ about traditions for new homeowners, Derek and Penelope swapping office gossip, whilst you’re engaged in a conversation with Dave and Hotch about the upcoming FBI triathlon in a few months when you’re interrupted by your phone ringing.

“SSA Paisley Selwyn” you speak into the phone, wondering why nobody else was taking a phone call, let alone a phone call from a bureau phone number; normally the entire team would receive a phone call if you were all out of the office to inform you of a new case or potential emergency. 

“This is Heather Price, Chief of the Crime Translation Unit. We’re in need of a translator for a case we’re working and as a language and linguistics expert, you’d be the perfect fit to help”

she tells you over the phone and you’re slightly unsure, you’d heard of the unit a few times in passing, but never been involved. This might strike an outsider as odd considering as the woman rightly stated, you did specialise in linguistics, but the BAU appealed to you much more.

“I’m flattered, but is there nobody else that can fill in for the case?” you query, you loved your work, but sometimes you needed a break and you weren’t overly keen on leaving breakfast with the team. With such bizarre schedules and hectic jobs, sometimes dealing with unspeakable things, you welcomed any normality that you can find. For that morning the eight of you aren’t FBI agents, you’re just eight friends out for breakfast and today that’s exactly what you needed. 

“Unfortunately not no. We’re keen to make use of your profiling abilities too. I’ll see you here in no less than forty minutes” she informs you, hanging up shortly after. Letting out a small sigh, you twist with the two pendants hanging around your neck, you’d been looking forward to this morning since the moment last month's breakfast ended and it hadn’t gone unnoticed by the team. 

Seeing your slightly crestfallen facial expression as you place your phone on the table, Derek is the first to question you. “What’s going on, Lee? Who was that?” concern evident on his face.

“Heather Price, she’s requested my help on a translation case” you tell him, looking down at the table as you do and when you look back up, you have the entire eyes of the team focused on you, a range of facial expressions on show; JJ and Emily look slightly surprised, Spence and Dave looked proud, whereas Hotch’s expression never falters, staying stoic as ever.  

Spencer’s eyebrows suddenly shoot up. “The translation unit? Isn’t that where Oliver WIlliams works?” he questions and you know he already knows the answer, his voice raising slightly being the dead giveaway and despite your slight annoyance at having to leave you can’t help but laugh at him.

“Don’t act like you don’t already know that, you’re not that smooth, Spence. I’ll tell him you said hi” you tell him, through Derek's confused expression only makes you laugh all the more, clearly he hadn’t been clued in on Spencer’s slight crush. Collecting yourself, you turn your attention to the brightly dressed woman to your left.

Penelope however, looked outraged that you had to leave. “What?! Now?! But it’s your day off, you can’t miss our breakfast, you’ve been looking forward to this for ages! Is there really nobody else they can call?”. Penelope exclaims, waving her hands as she expresses her annoyance at the interruption. Arguably, Penelope valued these outings with the team more than the rest of you might have done, working back in her office to perform her technical magic whilst the rest of you were out in the field, or even another state, left her somewhat isolated and therefore occasionally missing out of the odd inside joke so times like these were perfect for filling her in on any missed gossip and it broke your heart to see her upset at the change in plans.

“I know, I know, sorry PG, we’ll just have to do something another time” you tell her, kissing her cheek as you begin to gather your things in order to leave. Standing up, you bid the rest of the team a hurried goodbye, hearing the end of their conversation as you go.

“How many languages does she even speak? I lose track of her sometimes” JJ questions, though you can tell she’s joking and it’s Reid who answers.

“Three; French, Spanish and Italian. Though if you count sign language, it would be four, which is marginally impressive because statistically speaking..”.

Quickly swinging by your apartment to pick up your weapon and credentials, you decided against changing out of your very casual outfit, this was meant to be your day off after all. 

It was an odd feeling riding the elevator to a different floor, nerves building in your stomach for whatever it was you were about to work on. Stepping out of the elevator and taking a deep breath, you’re greeted by who you assume to be the woman you spoke with on the phone. “Unit Chief Heather Price, nice to meet you, please, come this way” she introduces herself to you with a welcoming smile, gesturing for you to follow her to her office.

“As I mentioned on the phone, we’re in need of an translator, specifically for Italian translations. I realise that your primary work for the bureau isn’t in fact translating, but you’ve come highly recommended to us and we think your knowledge of language and linguistics, along with your profiling abilities would prove to be an incredibly useful asset for this case” she informs you, handing you a brown folder that clearly contains the case information that you flip open and start to read over, leaning back on one of the office chairs when there’s a knock at the door.

“You wanted to see me?” the voice questions. Head snapping up from the file in your hand, you see that the voice belongs to a male detective and you immediately placed him to be Oliver Williams thanks to Spencer’s descriptions. He’d confided in you about his small crush during

one of the late night sessions in the library; the two had met around a month ago when the team was working a local case and in order to solidify a theory you and he were working on, Reid had gone to the translation office to collect a transcription manual and bumped into the man and since then the two had been buying each other coffee

“Ah, yes I did” Price tells him, ushering him into the room. “This is Dr Paisley Selwyn, I requested her help on this case as you know”. Pushing yourself up from the arm of the chair, you lean forward to shake his hand and the two of you exchange pleasantries and you can tell that the both of you will get on well as Price starts going over the case plan, explaining that 

essentially the two of you would be left to your own devices, taking the lead on the case and she would only be stepping in when it came to the interrogation of the suspect. 

Following Williams back out to the larger desk spaces, the two of you begin working the case, starting over from the very beginning, and coming up with entirely new strategies regarding everything from the translations of smaller articles of evidence, to various interview methods and spoken translations. Eventually you found yourself working in a rhythm with Williams, discovering that the two of you had similar methods in translating which sped the process along and soon you found yourself enjoying the work you were doing; applying theories, methods and techniques you hadn’t used since doing your masters degree and it came as an easy reminder as to why you loved working with language. When it came time for the interrogation of the suspect, it wasn’t hard to tell that both Price and Williams were impressed with your translation skills, picking up on the smallest changes and inconsistencies that eventually brought the case to a close at around eleven o’clock in the evening. 

Now you were sat with Williams filling out the huge stack of files for the case, because you weren’t officially part of the unit, there was more paperwork than usual and by the time you were both done and finally out the door, it was pushing midnight. Walking to your cars, the two of you conversed like you’d known each other for a lot longer than a day and you called across the car park to him “Oi, Williams, Spence told me to tell you hi” which caused him to smile from ear to ear and blush a deep pink and you smiled to yourself as you made your way home, singing along to the radio as you drove.

A/N: I can’t believe I’ve written 10 chapters of this fic already! Tried making this a slightly shorter chapter as the past few have been quite long. Don’t forget you can follow along and read the story over on my Wattpad: @opheliacassiopea

As always, let me know what you think; any feedback is welcome!🖤

[these-are-the-first-steps]

“The Rise of Skywalker”- A Review from Memory

So it’s been a week since I’ve had to live with this film in front of my eyes, and a week and a half that I’ve had to grapple with the brunt of its sins. With a heavy sigh, I think I’m ready to go through the play-by-play of every plot hole in this film that I can manage from memory without the thing in front of me. And even then, the laundry list is hefty. Keep in mind that this is a FILM-BASED review only- I have tried to refrain from including new information we have learned since its release last Thursday in an effort to keep this as focused and topical as possible.

+The first scene of this film is weird. I’m all for watching Adam Driver wild out on some dudes, but it is never explained who these guys are and if it’s just Kylo ‘committing more slaughter’ (as the casual audience is wont to think) or if there’s something significant here. As the movie goes on and Kylo makes it clear that he’s under no one’s thumb, *and* that the object he was after was Sith, you start to get an idea that maybe those guys at the intro are No Good, but this is never explained or confirmed. To a casual audience with no interest in additional materials, it just looks like Bad Ole Kylo Doing More Bad Ole Stuff. *sigh*

+Exogol and Palpatine’s hideout looks like the Borg Cube from Star Trek: First Contact from 1996. This really smacked me in the face how similar it was.

+Snoke’s significance getting sniped by Palpatine in one fell swoop felt like two five year olds arguing over action figures in the sandbox. “No! He’s dead now! Now the good guys can go on their quest!” “Well if he’s dead now, it’s only because MY guy was the REAL bad guy! DOOSHDOOSHDOOSHDOOSH!!” Like….really? At least Palpatine’s never-spoken-of Snoke manufacturing lab was vaguely interesting. Too bad we never saw anything about that- what a story of intergalactic puppet-masters that would have made! We’re not here for clever storytelling, though, so moving on…

+I don’t think they should have included Leia in this film. It really added to the disjointed nature of this movie with flat audio, crippled dialogue, and CGI where Leia only really had one facial expression for 90% of her appearances. It really wasn’t worth it. I know Star Wars doesn’t do flashbacks (which, frankly, I appreciate a lot), but I think they could have utilized the IDEA of Leia better than her actual self. Leia was forced, it showed, and it wasn’t good. Honestly they did a WAY better job reviving Tarkin in RO.

+An incredibly unnecessary amount of new information for the third act of a series was introduced in this film, starting with Leia suddenly being a well-trained Jedi or something. At least enough to ‘train’ Rey, which…frankly wasn’t believable. Leia having the force was a given. That she distanced herself from active application of the Force as a residual reaction to the bombshell of Darth Vader being her father is what is, and always has, made sense. THAT is a nuanced perspective, but it gets thrown out in favor of not just shoe-horning Leia in to the movie, but also because they had no idea what else to do with her at all in this film. This is also why Leia shouldn’t have been in this movie the way she was.

+Oh, you knew Palpatine was behind all this the whole time, Leia? Really? Always there, huh? When in TFA it was always snoke? Obvious dialogue lift is obvious, but the use of it was just Bad and inconsiderate to the story.

+Poe’s backstory was published on December 18th, 2015 in a book called “Before The Awakening” that details the lives of Poe, Finn, and Rey leading up to TFA. Poe is the son of two famous Rebel fighters and he grows up with a nice quiet life on Yavin 4 learning about ships and loving to fly. He goes straight from his home world to joining the Republic navy. It’s a handful of months before Leia Organa picks up on him and brings him into the Resistance. Now…this is a backstory that is JJ Abrams approved, has been out since 2015, and yet Oscar Isaac said he ‘never knew’ Poe’s backstory, and JJ somehow thinks four years later that there is space in this incredibly concise timeline for him to become a drug runner. What?? This was possibly the BIGGEST wtf moment for me in this film. What in the actual world. WHAT.

+Sidelining old characters to pointlessly introduce new ones does not serve a story, it clogs it up, drags down its rhythm, and confuses the hell out of it. As seen by Zorri and Jannah. And out of those two, only Jannah carried any kind of actual literary weight, because for Finn, he’s found more people like himself. This sort of setup is a typical play to foreshadow where Finn eventually settles down and goes at the end of the war. But this is never expounded on or explained further. It’s just, BOOM, more former troopers and a girl who is suddenly irrationally attached to him at all times.

+Rose gets replaced by Jannah, a brand new character that we only know one single thing about, and who gets to latch on to Finn out of the blue while Rose is left at home or on a ship. It was weird. It was obvious. It was incredibly awkward to watch. There was no point to Jannah clinging to Finn like this. She was reduced from a strong character to a cringy clingy one, while Finn’s love interest was completely ignored.

+The ‘Journey to The Rise of Skywalker’ comics released a couple weeks before the film heavily implied we’d get a lot of great Rose and Rey team time. We received none of it. It felt like someone had jerked a present away from us and it was a gross omission.

+It is only by the very end of the film and after multiple watches that you THINK they are trying to hint that Kylo is spiraling, thus why Leia steps in in death, but it never ever gets shown. Never once are we let in on Kylo’s state of mind. In fact, never once are we let in on *any* of these characters’ states of mind. We never really see what they are feeling or thinking or going through. Kylo is nothing but action when in TFA and TLJ we see him falling apart. This is what bad direction looks like, and it takes a Real Talent to fuck up directing an actor like Adam Driver. Another big sigh…

+There are only two cool things about this movie- The bleeding of reality between Kylo and Rey, and Palpatine’s shadow senate. When Kylo and Rey fight and the red bits go flying on the floor, it screamed serious TLJ aesthetics to me that I had to blink a moment. I think this ‘Bleed-through’ of their realities is the only TLJ hold-over we were allowed. It was a genuinely fascinating touch, which is how you know it didn’t come from *this* film’s production office.

+When you stick three people in a closet together, you expect some sort of progress in two-thirds of the potential relationships in such a cramped space. We received no such thing. Forced Trio Time resulted in no character development and seemed more like an unnecessary comic relief vehicle than anything.

+In ‘Before The Awakening’ and ‘Rey’s Survival Guide’, both publications printed under JJ Abrams’s  blessing, we learn Rey named *herself* after a helmet she found in the desert. How is it Rey’s alleged parents know her fake name? Gross, gross plot-hole.

+Four years was spent emphasizing that you don’t have to come from anywhere ‘special’ to be Important to a big story. Then they threw it out. Post-TROS interview with JJ reveals it was because they ‘couldn’t think of how else to get rey engaged in fighting palpatine’. Because he wasn’t a nasty enough dude on his own? Seriously? This is pure negligence.

+Four years was also spent emphasizing that you also don’t even NEED the force to be important to the big story and make a huge difference to the future. But let’s throw that out, too, and give Finn the force. Clearly regular people are absolutely worthless in the Star Wars Universe, according to JJ Abrams.

+Finn is only used to babysit Rey the entire time they share screen time together. The number of times he shouts her name could be turned into a drinking game. It’s one thing to care about somebody, and another thing entirely to act like you’re their high school chaperone. The whole thing was weird and awkward.

+Zorri Bliss sounds like a stripper name and she served no purpose other than to shoehorn Felicity into a star wars movie. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but Babu Frik is the only true-to-star-wars critter in this whole film.

+Leia literally goes and lays down on her own funeral spread? What was that about. And that’s what that was because why would her bed be out in the open like that? That was really, really weird. And the RoTJ medal throwback was just a tacky tether to the past.

+Everyone seems so irrationally tethered to the past in this film. Kylo Ren’s spent two movies desperate to ‘leave the past behind’ and I don’t blame him at this point because it’s getting exhausting.

+As stated previously, it’s only vaguely suspected but Kylo seemed to SUPPOSED to be spiraling. Adam Driver plays Kylo like a man finally free of the voices in his head, but the plot and dialogue point to an entirely different direction saying that REALLY the monsters have allegedly doubled-down and he’s even more unhinged than before. Here is a MAJOR indication of story re-working after the film has already been shot. Adam Driver, and Daisy for that matter, is a PRECISE actor. It seems almost impossible to tell a story with him that you did not originally MEAN to tell. And it shows. JJ tried to U-Turn the story but it absolutely failed- Adam’s Kylo Ren is a calm, free man, focused, who finally knows what his purpose in life is, and that is uniting with his Dyad in the force. When really JJ tried very hard to suggest that he was spiraling so hard and so ‘lost’ in the Dark Side that it took his mother’s last breath to swing him back around. No one is going to see that narrative. The only reason why I see this shoddy attempt is because I’ve been absolutely immersed in this shit since December 2015. But the main audience? This was absolutely not conveyed.

+Seeing Dark Side Rey was nothing but a ‘cool’ moment and actually served zero function to the plot. Rey was always shown as being Grey in the force and someone who struggled to maintain balance. If that whole scene was removed, it wouldn’t change anything.

+Kylo was never in a position to kill Rey on the Death Star, and Rey taking her cheap shot to stab him while he heard his mother’s voice is an attempt to convey how much seeing her Sith self affected her than Kylo’s already very faded aggression in this film but it failed. It was weird and out of character, and even coming to that conclusion took may rewatches to come to because there is NEVER a ramp-up to Rey’s darkside taking over long enough to stab Kylo- there’s no fire, no red eyes, no teeth, none of it, to indicate she was ‘overcome’ so it just looked like bad mischaracterization. Yikes.

+Kylo and Han’s moment on the Death Star is the most moving scene of the entire film. The dialogue starts out rather familiar, and it almost seems like a cop-out, until you realize….how many times has Ben had this conversation with himself?? He doesn’t seem shocked at all that his father is there. Not at all. In fact, that Last Conversation on the bridge of Starkiller comes off as a well-rehearsed dance that Ben puts himself through regularly. And every time he hopes it’ll be affirmation enough that it’s all been worth it. But here, at the last reenactment of the worst day of his life, the script changes. He surrenders. He says dad. And he rejects Kylo Ren forever. Harrison Ford and Adam Driver are two beautifully matched, talented actors and I’d watch a movie with the two of them in it any day. God bless them.

+Hux has been wasted for the past two films. He was Terrifying in TFA and Dom gave him such significant presence that I was genuinely terrified for what he might try in the future. But instead he was lost as comic relief. When it is comically delivered that HE is the spy, every single person in my movie theatre shouted “WHAT??” in a way that was not a Good what, but in a “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me” kind of what, and I will never ever forget that. I hate seeing Star Wars diminished like this.

+Luke rehashing Obi-wan’s speech to him about how Rey MUST confront the Big Bad was an obvious rehash, and way too convenient to what Palpatine wanted. This whole appearance of Luke is very suspect, but that would be crediting them again with clever storytelling, which again this is not.

+Luke claims that Leia saw ‘the death of her son’ at the end of her Jedi Path, which one can assume why she threw it away. But then Luke says something bizarre about ‘hoping someone else would pick up her path someday’. Is that...is that not the same path leading to Ben’s death that she was avoiding in the first place? And if someone else picks it up, is that not no longer Leia’s path but that other person’s? Therefore, is not the outcome automatically going to be different and thus *avoid* Ben’s death? This was an attempt at supposedly clever foreshadowing or Mystical Talk or some shit, but all it was was dialogue that backfired in meaning spectacularly due to looping-in on itself too many times. Luke negates himself at the same time he tries to prove his point...which he then negates in the same breath. What a mess.

+All of Ben Solo’s lines were cut the last act of the film to stuff more pointless exposition at the END of film and to give more screen time to Ian McDiarmid. Ian’s great, but he’s not the main character of this series, and cutting Ben’s lines for this was Gross.  

+Space Horses? Really?? I didn’t like them in TLJ but at least there they had context- they had zero context here. The size of the horses and the ship they came off of was absurdly mismatched. Is that ship the TARDIS? That whole bit was so unnecessary and ridiculous, especially with zero setup. Which is amazing because this film is 90% set-up.

+All those ships at the end? That’s all it took? After books and comics going on about how everyone’s too terrified to help Leia because of FO scorched earth policy? Jesus it was weak, and too obvious a Deus ex Machina with THAT many ships.

+Palpatine’s Shadow Senate is cool. The idea that this guy trapped on an ugly planet stuck on Sith life-support couldn’t go two seconds without attention and praise to the point where he had to recreate the exact same senate he destroyed years ago is a concept I like. Is the Shadow Senate just in the *shape* of the old senate but filled with animated Sith proxies? Or is it actually comprised of the enslaved souls of former Senators now forced to attend the Emperor for eternity? Either way, destroying the Shadow Senate at least either set those souls free or sent them back to wherever they came from. That was actually interesting, and it’s a shame we didn’t get to learn more about such a genuinely creepy thing.

+Palpatine’s ‘we’re family’ routine drops the moment he realizes Ben and Rey are a dyad. This is suspicious, but considering the whole movie so far, it seems incorrect to giver JJ and Torrio credit for a possible mis-direct.

+Rey and Ben’s realities bleeding into each other is experienced again in swapping the light saber. This is cool. This is probably the coolest moment in the film. And then the coolness literally gets thrown into a pit when, instead of the both of them, as a Dyad, defeating Palpatine, Rey is left to carry the burden alone.

+Oh hey look a cop-out to save Rey from being bad- just have her reflect his own power back at him so it’s like he’s killing himself, wow, so original! The second Palpy revealed his gameplan about wanting to die, this became the obvious choice to both kill him and avoid giving him what he wanted. Eh….

+The Star Wars 9-movie series is the story of one man desperately begging anyone within hearing range to kill him, apparently. This is so, so old by the 9th friggin movie. 

+Ben Solo spends his entire life begging for guidance from his ancestors only to be ignored and Rey get all their attention instead. Ben Solo spends his entire life since the womb being a burden to his parents by merely existing and being manipulated by gross sith ghosts. But nah, let’s be parents to Rey and help out Rey. This is not to say she doesn’t deserve any of this, but to say there are priorities here- Rey has had a lonely life, but at least she had her sanity and was self-sufficient. Ben had neither his sanity or any control over his own life whatsoever. And to place Rey above Ben is a literal mess. The two of them were meant by the Force to rise TOGETHER, and it didn’t happen.

+Rey doesn’t disappear when she ‘dies’ after using the last of her life force to both feed Palpatine, fight him, AND defeat him. And yet while Rey has two strikes in her before kicking it, Ben, someone who is RADICALLY more trained in the force, its lore, and mechanics, only has one? This doesn’t make any sense.

+Rey has no reaction to the literal other half of her soul vanishing in front of her. Because this is a mangled JJ Abrams Finale(tm) and why should anyone, let alone his own characters, have any space to Feel? I mean, that’s not what movies are even about, right? Feeling and Telling A Story? It’s not that, right? Right?? JJ Abrams covers up Rey’s reaching-hands scar on her arm for the entire film, doesn’t address it, and apparently hates the shit out of it. I don’t know how the King of Cheese could possibly hate something like that. It was a weird and obvious omission, and frankly disappointing because the scar had come to mean something at the end of TLJ and it, like a lot in this film, got thrown in the trash.

+More forced trio time in the form of a group hug where nothing gets actually expressed because we ran out of space for dialogue 30 pages back.

+Anakin Skywalker viewed Tatooine, his place of enslavement, as the worst place in the galaxy. Luke Skywalker spent his entire youth trying to escape. Leia hated it on principle because it was where Darth Vader came from and where she herself had been enslaved in a gross gold bikini for a giant slug. Rey spent 14 years of her life dreaming of leaving the sand planet she was trapped on. But I guess that’s a fitting place to bury some memories, yeah? The place where nothing good ever, ever happened. That’s a nice spot, right?

+Rey Skywalker isn’t explained, is never led up to, and feels like a gross gimmie after four years of trying to create a Better Message that names don’t matter. HEAVY SIGH.

+Rey watches the two suns set as she is left with little more than she started- alone, on a sand planet, but this time taunted by the Twin Suns of Tatooine that the other half of her soul is literally missing and that she is now left with a gaping wound in her Force signature and her own spirit worse than if she’d just lost a Force Bonded mate.

+Ben Solo is left missing, vanished on a world that is supposedly a thin spot in the force, with no ghost, no presence, and no one to mourn him- not even by the other half of his very soul. THREE GENERATIONS of Skywalkers over NINE FILMS died to try and rescue their future embodied in the form of Ben Solo and it looks like it was for nothing. Instead, the incessant bad guy no one can move on from looks like he ultimately wins the day through an alleged granddaughter, and even that claim is on shaky ground considering the mistakes in the vision and how quickly the family conversation vanished upon the revelation that Ben and Rey are a dyad. Ben is lost, so every family member died for nothing, apparently. But hey, this is a Fun and Hopeful narrative, right?

+While the Final Order fleet is destroyed at the end, the First Order is.....still out there? It’s still out there. Nothing in that department has changed whatsoever. Leaders die. They get replaced. The cycle goes on. We spent three movies batting at a fly we didn’t even kill. Amazing.

Overall this movie is BRUTAL. Every other scene is a plot hole served to us on a silver platter, with the biggest insult being that they are plot points JJ created HIMSELF 4-6 years ago. This man literally shot himself in the face and then said it was fine as he bled out all over the film reels and it shows. If you were anyone who came along for the Additional Materials ride of the past four years, you were greeted by this film with a hard, swift, and REPEATED, backhand to the face. There was no reward here at the end of this road for fans, old and new, who actually paid attention and took an interest in the deeper lore surrounding this sequel trilogy. There was just a big fat Disney-branded middle finger as all your hard work and cash was ripped from you with a trademark villain laugh.

And that is what we’re left with.

This review does not go into detail over what we’ve discovered since the release of the film, either. That it was never finished in the editing room. That a current comic series, Rise of Kylo Ren, and what’s in the new TROS visual dictionary maddeningly contradict themselves. That allegedly SIX different endings were shot for this movie, and in the end the one they chose looks like it was *literally* reverse-engineered to confusingly kill, as JJ once called him, ‘The Other Half of Our Protagonist’. There is no time to go into detail about how Oscar Isaac just told us that noone in the cast knew that Rey Palpatine was going to be endgame except for maybe Adam when they made him do ADR declaring it with a masked face on screen (convenient). There is no room to show you the collective cast reaction they all gave to the end of the movie- none of them good, and John Boyega looking like he was holding back from punching something (he loved Kylo/Ben as much as the audience did and more). And there is no room to include what we will continue to find out as the days roll on about the tangled mess of a film that was edited and reedited, and how word on the street is a cocky director demanded Carte Blanche from Kathleen Kennedy, and I guess the story group too given the state of things, and then promptly self-destructed in the grossest, messiest end to a 40+ year series in cinema history.

There’s just no space.

But there IS a lesson.

And the lesson is this: No matter what, never stop investing in Story. Never stop caring about the details and about plot and about moving a story FORWARD. Never be afraid to move FORWARD. Look at TROS, the mess it is and the potential it had it in itself to be, and then look at the beauty that is TFA and the love that went into TLJ, and study that shit until it burns into your brain- Do not repeat those mistakes. Go out into the world and write better, shoot better, direct better, and BE BETTER. Because these producers and directors? They’re old and they’re on their way out. Just like the stable boy at the end of TLJ who secretly has the Force, know and realize that those of you out there reading this are the next generation of storytellers. YOU. And YOU, and I, and others out there like us who loved this series with our whole heart and who are watching it bleed out now on a floor that doesn’t give two shits about it, have the ability to make sure this NEVER happens again. But in order to do that….we have to pick up that pen. Pick up that pencil. Pick up that camera. Jot down that story idea and share it with likeminded friends. Go out there and CREATE, and create BETTER. Because it’s up to us now- the future of cinema is up to us. And my god, we have so much potential….

[reylofanfictionanthology]

For one is love and both are one in love is now live!  

Authors will be revealed next week!  For now all fics are anonymous.  Treats can be posted through author reveals on 2/21.  We will post an updated masterpost at that time.

For one is love and both are one in love collection on AO3 |  Gift Fic Master Post Part Two | Treats Masterpost

Gifts Fic Master Post Part One:

ghosts on the shore for aaronBursar

“I meant what I said to you that day on the Death Star. I thought I could never go back. I still think it even now—that I don’t belong here, that I never will.” “But you did come back,” she said, squeezing his hand. “You’re here now. With me. You chose it. Despite everything, we made it, both of us.” They sat in silence for awhile, hands clasped while they watched the camp clear as people finally turned in for the night. Then, suddenly, Ben was struck with an idea. “What if we took a trip?”

Sugar High for abbytheatre08

When Maz Kanata hosts five weeks of a Battle of the Bands competition, Rey Johnson and Kylo Ren find themselves both pitted against one another, and drawn together as the weeks go on.

Delayed For A While for aionimica

Death cannot stop love. All it can do is delay it awhile.

I am ready to follow you even though I don't know where for AlwaysEverlark

Her closest friends want Rey to move on from what happened on Exegol, but she refuses to accept that Ben Solo, her soulmate in the Force, is dead. Instead, she undertakes a rescue mission to bring Ben home--no matter the risk.

A More Perfect Union for america_oreosandkitkats

Rey, new to DC, tags along to a stuffy networking event with her friend -- they're both poor and, hell, there's free booze. Ben, a recruiter for the lobbyist firm he works for, finds the intern with the soft voice and angry eyes a fun challenge -- especially when he finds out she works for his estranged mother Senator Leia Organa.

In the Den of the Darkwolf for Amy326

Rey awakened in the darkwolf’s den.

happy cockus day for andabatae

She prefers the nip of New Hampshire winters, heavy winds blowing in her hair, being bundled up in three layers with pens whose ink freeze fast and thaw slow. She loves warm buildings, and Christmas breaks, and slurping down huge bowls of ramen in the evenings, but being on the ground, a clipboard in her hand, boots on a voter’s doorstep? That’s where she knows she belongs. So there are a lot of things going against Rey Johnson’s introduction to Ben Solo, his moody personality probably the least of her worries, since he’s the reason she’s not outside, making some sort of tangible effort to get his mother elected as president.

Hope Lives for aNerdObsessed

This AU story takes place right after the Battle of Exegol, Rey and Ben have just defeated Palpatine and they are both seriously injured but not mortally wounded. When all hope is lost for them as there is no one coming to get them, old friends of the past come to their aid.

Two Bits (or The Haircut) for Ann3onymous

Three days into their marriage of convenience, Ben and Rey are maybe starting to realize that there’s more to this arrangement than a green card or a cooperative board of directors.

We've Got a Good Thing Here for Anysia

Rey & Ben Solo navigate their feelings in the aftermath of the end of the war. With Ben a "functionally dead" force ghost, Rey has to come to terms with how she will balance restoring liberty to the galaxy and making her relationship with Ben work in a... physical sense. It's a difficult enough task to begin with, and it doesn't help that every time they're alone someone seems to require Rey for something.

Event Horizon for Apisa_B

Rey runs into Kylo Ren on a mission for the Resistance, and they have to work together against their wishes. This would be simple... if working together didn't involve pretending to be married, sharing a hotel room, and a lot of unresolved feelings.

still caught in yesterday's wake for Apricot

Her heart is heavy with fear—fear that one day she will no longer be able to recall the shape of Ben’s face, or the timbre of his voice, or the exact color of his eyes; that her memory of him will fade until she is left with nothing but the pain of his absence, like some phantom limb that aches and aches and aches, relentlessly.

A Dark Day Dream for ArdeaJestin

Ben's come home, but Rey can't face him. Not because of anything he's done, at least not in real life. But in her fantasies? oh yes.

Become Who You Were Meant to Be for Aurae

Kylo is a fighter both by training and by preference. Tactics, not strategy. Action, not discussion. Every instinct in him wants to solve his problems by grabbing his sword and shedding some blood. But those easy days are behind him now. He has a galaxy to run. It would be easier if only he could stop thinking about her.

The Spaces Inbetween for Ayrith (freijya)

It wasn’t the first time. Not the first since Crait and she saw him kneeling and their eyes met with anger and ache and want and everything else they didn’t have to say. No. Not the first, nor the second, nor even the third. This was a well trodden path that they all walked over and over. As if the Force was taking their hands and despite both of them tearing it away, still trying to bring them together. --- Rey and Kylo have been dealing with the Force bond for some time, but it finally reaches a tipping point.

The Least Of What I Could Do for benperor-ren (winterelf86)

"I refuse to play opposite someone who has never had a part in their entire life," sneers Ben. "Either Rey goes or I do."

Niima's for bensolosredemption

Though Niima's is a questionable establishment, it's always been Ben's favorite bar. It's not just because he's inexplicably attracted to the new bartender, either - though he has to admit she might have something to do with it.

Devil Spawn for Biekewieke

After a hot anonymous encounter at The Annual Organa Halloween Ball, Rey realizes she slept with the horrible guy who is her new boss. But he doesn't recognize her! And he asks her to track down his mystery hookup, which she totally agrees to do (wink wink, haha, she's lying). But then she finds out she's pregnant! GASP! What's a scared, pregnant single girl to do? (Other than take a nap because she's exhausted.)

Belonging for bitterbones

Friends-with-benefits except whoops I'm in love with you now and hate seeing you flirt with other people because we're technically not together.

Paradise for bittersnake

For two people whose souls are inseparably united, the question of sex shouldn't be that complicated. Given Ben and Rey's individual histories, however, it really comes as no surprise. But that's all right. They’ll have their whole lives together to figure it out, if Rey and Ben and possibly several hundred generations’ worth of Jedi ghosts have anything to say about the matter. Which they do.

Miss Johnson & the Professor for blackheretic (redlondons)

Her heart wants to erupt through her throat, and she audibly gulps, trying to keep her gaze from the only place it wants to go. Thank fuck his eyes are so hypnotic; she can get lost in them as she stammers for English syllables. “Y-Yes, Dr. Solo?” “Seriously, Rey.” Is he blushing? Surely not. “I’ve known you all year, call me Ben.” “Ben,” she mumbles. It tastes like delicious sacrilege. “I actually think you’re in my bed.” “Huh?” “The couch. I was going to sleep there. Remember?” Rey clutches the blanket to her collarbone, hoping the light fabric is tented loosely enough to cover her breasts. Fuck, why does he have to be so distractingly hot? “No, it’s all right. I don’t mind, Professor.” “Ben," he insists firmly. “And I won’t be able to sleep at all knowing I’m comfy in a bed while you’re sleeping on that thing.”

Owner Malfunction. for Bombastique

One year after surviving Execgol, Rey and Ben Solo find themselves in each other's company after they are both captured while trying to take back the Falcon from Kanjiklub remnants. (AKA - The Force, the Falcon, love, and droids.)

Stealing the Light for bratanimus

Redemption isn’t given. It’s earned. Or: As the galaxy rebuilds from war, the man formerly known as Kylo Ren tries to make peace with the person he was, and the person he’s becoming.

Rey Niima and the American (Hot Piece of) Ass that She Just Wants to Tap, while also Not Dying in the Triwizard Tournament or Becoming Otherwise Inconvenienced or Maimed for Cairdiuil_Paiste

Completed for the prompt: Hogwarts AU! Triwizard tournament time with seventh year Rey representing Hogwarts. She wants to impress the MACUSA representative to strengthen her chances of joining their graduate programme. Too bad American diplomat Ben Solo doesn't seem to like her…

a forest of stars for caisha

Rey works hard at the diner to save up for her long dreamed-of vacation to Finland. She's lonely, but that's not new. What is new is Kylo Ren, the CEO of Orpheus Corp and new boss of her best friend Finn. When Finn and Kylo Ren stop by the diner for lunch, Rey feels as though she's finally met someone who understands her. But who is Kylo Ren, and what's his secret? A Modern Fae AU

I am a Soul Longing for Ceallaigh

Rey has spent the last two years searching the galaxy for clues about how to bring Ben back. Now, finally, it seems she has a solid lead. The planet Xolutel is said to be a vergence in the Force, and myth has it there's a hidden temple where worshipers of the Force were granted their deepest desires. No matter how slim the possibility, Rey owes it to Ben and herself to check it out. She's not known to give up easily.

The World Has Been Sad Since Tuesday for ceciliasheplin

The creature on his bed defied explanation, but Kylo Ren had a distinct feeling that there was nothing to worry about, nothing to fear. At least, not in this room. Demons lay in wait outside, but not here. Best not to let anyone know about this.

Be With Me for Chthonia

A force connection between Kylo (Ben), and Rey. It takes place while she is on Ach-To, and he is on the Death Star.

between the shadow and the soul for ClockworkCrow (icemink)

“You and Skywalker have been keeping it a secret,” she said, her eyes searching his face to catch him when he lies. “But I know the truth. I learned it, the day after we fought on Mustafar. That Lord Vader was his father, and your grandfather.” He struggled against her stasis but she pushed back harder, her power swirling around them both. “Rey—” “Don’t you see, Ben?” There was a ghost of a smile on her lips. “The darkness is inside of you, too. You don’t have to keep fighting it. You were meant to be mine.” Mine. . or: Jedi Knight Ben Solo should really stop doing smuggling runs with his father. Kira Ren should really stop trying to turn him to the dark side.

The Rescue for cohava

“What is it?” Ben asked, watching the worry lines form on Rey’s forehead as she checked the message that had just pinged through her datapad. “Poe’s leading the relief efforts on Faratula. There’s a boy there, Force sensitive. Orphaned. Poe says it’s a pretty bad situation.” “Let’s go get him, then,” he said without pausing.

how easy you are to need for Crimson_Alchemistress

The war is finished, yet Rey still carries wounds. They come in the form of nightmares, but Ben is there to comfort her.

stuck on how it feels here next to you for crossingwinter

Around four months ago, Ben and Rey married out of convenience. It had started that way and one of the key reasons why they had agreed to this in the first place was the condition that neither had romantic feelings for the other. This is their life, both head of heels for the other while not really knowing what to do about it.

Blue Sand for Crysania

The pale crimson sun rises above the horizon across the fields. A slight wind gently brushed Rey’s face. She left the ship and coverded herself with a blue scarf from a desert heat. She stepped forward, carefully observing the small city before her. Hot sand was burning her feets despite thick soles of boots. “This is going to be disaster,” she told herself with a crooked smile.

covert mission: baby acquisition for crystanagahori

In which Rey decides she's ready to start a family of her own and Ben Solo, her boss and dear friend, would make the perfect sperm donor. * It was a stupid, girlish crush. One that likely wasn’t reciprocated, and could land her in a world of trouble with HR if she acted brashly. But still, she wanted him. He could waive his parental rights for all she cared. They could enter into some sort of contract, if such things existed. But he was the perfect candidate, the ideal sperm donor. Ben Solo.

hands that hurt, hands that heal for cuddlesome

Rey climbs on top of Ben and makes out with his sopping self after Force healing his stab wound.

It was not Death, for I stood Up for CwenPhy

Emperor Palpatine lied on Exegol; Rey is not his granddaughter. Rey sets off on a journey, led by Obi-Wan Kenobi, to bring Ben Solo back from the World Between Worlds.

Good Boy for dankobah

Rey takes her dog to a nearby veterinary clinic for an emergency and doesn't expect to meet Ben (or anyone) while there.

The Unbreakable Bond for DarkSideOfMe

After Crait, Rey thought she had severed their Force Bond, or at least closed it, but some weeks ago she started feeling it, a presence in the back of her mind. Then she could hear him saying her name or other random words or feelings: concern, anxiety, loneliness, longing..to be fair, she didn’t know who those feelings belonged to, if there were Kylo’s or hers. And that was the other reason to put an end to this; she wasn’t ready to deal with anything different to her anger and disappointment. She had to focus on her training, on the Resistance, in their fight against “his” First Order. She was scared, scared of something she couldn’t put a name to, and last night had just showed her how important it was to break their connection. It was time to read the Jedi texts she’s been putting off for too long.

NiimaRide for datswatutink

Journey urge her not to stop believin' but provide no further clarification before she's strapped in the back seat and they're pulling away from the only real break she's had in twenty-four years.

To Hold and Give Light for dearly

After Exegol, Rey takes an injured Ben back to the Resistance.

a conundrum of lightsabers for devon380black (kryptonian17)

In the aftermath of Crait, Rey is left with two halves of a broken lightsaber she has no idea how to fix. As her force bond conversations with Ben continue, she comes to understand he's the only one who can help her with her problem. Maybe if they can repair one thing, they can repair something else too.

What Happens in Hotel Chandrila for DrPearlGatsby

Accompanying her best friends to a Galaxy Wars convention in Chandrila sounded like a good idea at first. But third-wheeling sucks, and that's how Rey finds herself daydrinking alone at the hotel bar. And then she gets a free drink from a tall, brooding, handsome stranger…

Until the Wild Feelings Leave You for dustoftheancients

Rehabilitating from a battle injury leaves Rey an irritable mess. The way Ben hovers over her does nothing to help.

Kintsugi for ElegyGoldsmith

In the darkest moments, the galaxy is still filled with light.

give me shapes and letters, if it’s not forever for ElleRen31

She holds out her hand, “I don’t think we’ve met, I’m Rey.  I work at the flower shop next door.” He must be new, or she’s just a shut-in during work because she would’ve remembered seeing him after a year of being here. “I’m Kylo, I own the tattoo shop.”  He points to his building and her eyebrows raise as he shakes her hand.  Owner? So he’s the head honcho? She hums to herself and then keeps the smile plastered on her face. Then she sets her sights on the dogs, “What are their names?”

Where the ocean goes for Elywyngirlie

Sometimes getting out alive is the victory. Sometimes the rest takes a little time.

it shall not be death for englishable

Rey of the Jedi Knights is sent with her sword and Holy Fire, to destroy a palace of thorns. It doesn't quite go as planned.

The Reckoning for Erin410

Because of Rey, Ben has grown rather good at waiting. But she’s waiting, too, for something that hasn’t dawned on him yet. [Post-TROS mildly angsty marriage proposal fluff, hope you enjoy!]

Trading Places for Fairleigh

Kylo… Kylo awoke to the sound of her whimpering his name. He sat bolt upright in Rey’s extremely uncomfortable cot. Anxious for her safety, he reached out for her with his mind. Rey? He heard her moan and heat instantly pooled between his legs. Curious. The sensation was different but not unwelcome. Then he saw Rey, or rather he saw himself, naked and writhing on his bed. His mouth fell open. Rey was... masturbating. He watched in awe as she pumped his shaft up and down, slowly but forcefully. Kylo… She called his name again.

You'll Turn for FangirlintheForest

A retelling of the Last Jedi's elevator and throne room scenes with a role reversal twist. Can Smuggler Ben turn Dark Rey?

Building Something Together for fantastic_fanatics

When Ben confronts his new upstairs neighbor who keeps making all manner of odd noises at all manner of hours, he didn't expect what she's doing up there. He also didn't expect her to be so pretty.

Little Starfighter for Fic_me_senseless

Convinced he ruins everything he touches, isolated and lonely Ben Solo successfully pushes everyone away, except for the girl who sees something in him she recognizes.

Benvenuto nella nostra famiglia for gennalannisters

"Well, I have sensitive information here. Dinner is just actually a ploy. It’s actually an interrogation to make sure you didn't read the documents." She turned and smirked at him as they headed down the stairs, "If that's the case, I'm happy to be interrogated through wining and dining.” Love is in the air at Harvard Square.

Binary Suns for gigi_marlee

Young Ben Solo meets a young Rey. The two form an intense and instant attachment to the confusion of Ben's parents and his Uncle, Jedi Master Luke Skywalker. What is a dyad and what will it mean for two children who have found belonging in each other?

more everything for HalfwayThrough

"I'm the boss, I've earned the right to show up whenever the fuck I want." He was arrogant, condescending, and an asshole. And he didn't have a mark on his wrist.

One Stick of Unsalted Butter for HopeRebel

Rey's neighbor is the rudest, least considerate person she had to interact with. However, when she runs out of butter in the middle of night trying to bake cookies for Rose's birthday, there is only person she knows is awake and he is her only hope. Of course, things don't go according to plan.

come home, ben for hxllosweetie33

He looked at their hands, watched as Rey intertwined their fingers together, and fought the back the shutter from the contact. “ Rey…” He whispered. She brought her hand to his face – calloused tips brushing against his scar – observing his face, every detail of it, the bags and dark circles under his eyes, the paleness of his skin, his dry lips, the lack of light behind his eyes.

Ashes of Life for iamladyloki

Dark Rey becomes a reality and Ben has to remind her who she is

Negotiated Settlement for ilum

General Leia Organa has brought a small team with her to Kaytuu 5, expecting to negotiate a ceasefire between the First Order-controlled planetary government and local Resistance fighters. Unfortunately, Supreme Leader Armitage Hux has other plans. Rey will need the assistance of a Certain Someone who no longer calls himself Kylo Ren if she and her friends are to save the day.

Coming Home for incognitajones

After the Battle of Exegol, Rey and an injured Ben are trapped together on an uninhabited planet.

The Stray for itsinthestars

Rey moves in across the hall from Ben; a former foster kid alone in the city, aspiring to be an actress. Ben is a ladder-climbing white collar businessman with a horrible boss and zero social life. Which is just the way he likes it. So why in the world has this insufferable creature made it her life's work to adopt him? From sharing her dinner to doing his laundry, she seems determined to make a connection. In the end, it's easier for Ben to just let her. But opening up means letting your heart be vulnerable.

Peace and Purpose for itsnotillegal

Across the stars, Rey and Ben yearn for each other, neither able to move on, both facing the unending nights alone. But the Force longs for balance as surely as they long for each other.

Christmas Blues for karlamartinova

The first snow had fallen, covering the ground like a white blanket. The emergence of winter weather always marked the increase of Christmas moods. The season when people fervently decorated their houses and you couldn’t walk through the mall or downtown area without hearing a Christmas jingle. The neighborhood already sparkled with multicolored lights and inflated or authentic snow-made snowmen. Rey Johnson’s festive mood rose with each house she drove by, her fingers tapping on the wheel as “Rocking Around the Christmas Tree”faded and transitioned into another song.

prince and the sea for kuresoto

Prince Ben Chewbacca Solo Organa, descendant of the house of Naberrie and the line of Skywalker, heir to the Starbird pirate fleet, has followed in the family tradition of slaying monsters and ruling the high seas. Which in no way is an attempt at ignoring his soulmate bond.

what stranger miracles for La_Catrina

Ben can’t even manage to die right, apparently. 

the universe resting in my arms for Lightningpelt

Rey sees Ben, quietly tooling around the Skywalker homestead, his hands wet with mechanic's grease, and the image is so perfect that she holds her breath, not wanting to mar it with a loud breath.

counting my steps, reaching out to you for Lizardbeth

All her life, Rey has felt snatches of someone else's emotions, seen visions of other places, other people she's certain she's never seen before. In a world where everything had been taken away from her, this connection was hers alone. She is wholly unprepared for the day she finds out that the person at the other end of the connection is a Jedi fighting as part of the Resistance against her delusional Master.

Soulmates for LostInQueue

After Ben Solo disappears in front of her eyes, she finds a way to bring him back, where love began…

Heal for LRRH17

A few weeks after the Battle of Crait, the Force connects Rey and Ben again on several occasions.

Softly, Softly  for lucymonster

When the Resistance start to pick up distress calls from defecting Stormtroopers, they move to save as many as they can. It doesn't occur to them that the First Order might be after the same renegades until they're right on top of them.

First Impressions and Unexpected Connections for LueurdeLaube

War has ravaged the galaxy, but finally, there is a chance at peace. Her grandfather arranges for Princess Rey Palpatine to wed the Supreme Leader Kylo Ren, broadcast across the galaxy to usher in the new era. They've never met before, but he's sent her letters.

All These Things That I've Done for MahoganyDoodles

Someone dropped down to Rey's level and reached for the empty plastic shell of her case. She stilled for a moment, afraid that she was about to get smacked with it, afraid to look up. “Sorry about him,” she heard over the sound of her heart beating through her ears. Not Hux? This voice was deeper. Rey looked up and saw Ben Solo in front of her, holding out the case for her, a sympathetic look in his dark brown eyes.

For Now for maq_moon

There are plenty of things he could say, but he doesn’t. Buying you muffins makes me excited to get out of bed in the morning. I wish I could go back in time and be the kind of person you could like. I don’t remember my life before you. ---------- When Kylo finds his soulmate, she doesn't know, and he doesn't tell her.

[dragonrajafanfiction]

Dragon Dancer IV: Sacred Fire

The person formally known as Lu Mingfei climbed into the truck bed without assistance. Despite his dire condition a mere few minutes ago, he had regained a good amount of his strength and I could see why he was such a threat to Hybrids even now. 

“I’ll keep watch. Don’t stay too long.” The cold eyed girl called Zero looked up at me and for the first time, I saw reflected in the light of the moon, the World Tree emblem of Cassell.

“I don’t think we’ve met but... thank you.”

“Save your gratitude. I need you to help free Z.” She said, turning away from me and eying the surrounding woods.

“Z...?” She didn’t answer and my heart dropped a little at her coldness.

I returned to Mingfei and stood awkwardly. The harpoon was still in his chest. A constant rivulet of blood had stained the entire front of his shirt in a dark, sticky red. 

Once again I felt useless and remained at a distance, watching him. I wasn’t sure how dragons ate their own. I understood that he had shattered the skeleton of Fenrir and used it as armor, somehow absorbing the power into himself to unleash destruction on our hunters.

Now seemed different, he stood between the two corpses, his eyes lowered. He raised one hand to his chin, deep in thought.

I folded my hands behind me and looked around, but there was no place in the dark trailer to hide or sit down. “Should I... step outside?”

He raised his eyes to me in confusion. “Why?”

“Well...” I looked down at the shriveled but still remarkably preserved bodies.

“Are you uncomfortable around death?”

He was looking at me seriously. 

“I know what its like to lose friends. They were... your friends. Your children almost. Right?”

His eyes narrowed slightly. “Keep in mind that these are the ones who banded with the humans to kill me. Remember?”

“Yes... I ... remember.” The record of the wars of the dragon kings was well recorded. It was one of the few extensive records that people still had.

“Tell me what you’re thinking, Ouroboros.”

I didn’t quite understand why he cared what I thought. He should understand better than I did. Those fearsome golden eyes lit up the space and held such ancient wisdom. 

“When you were still Lu Mingfei, you were friends with him. You always held the sorrow of losing him with you. Even though you fought and killed him in the end, Lu Mingfei... he kept Old Tang on this Starcraft Friends List. He never deleted him.”

My eyes fell to the shriveled corpse. “Lu Mingfei would be sad. He wouldn’t cry because he rarely ever did. He held his sorrow inside. And...”

“Would he not eat him, even in a weakened state?”

I nodded in confirmation.

“Hey.” Zero was back at the truck, holding out a phone. “It’s for you.”

Who would be calling me? The answer to my mental question popped up immediately. Zihang! He must have gotten EVA sorted!

I hurried to take the phone. Zero immediately stepped back out. Mingfei watched me with open curiosity.

“Hello?”

“It’s Zihang. What’s happening now?”

“I have Mingfei and I’m with a woman named Zero. We managed to escape with out civilian casualties. Mingfei was hurt but he’s recovering. Did you fix EVA?”

“Her programming was restored thank to Fingel’s phone app that could do it. I’m good at hacking but her programming is too robust, even for me. She’s ordered all units to stand down and retreat, but EVA doesn’t control all of the Secret Party though. Be cautious of anyone you see.”

“Yes...”

A voice suddenly cut in, a low tenor growl. “What is this? Are you sure you’re really married?”

“Caesar!” I was so happy I couldn’t help but sigh with joy.

“Listen to that! Just a sentence and she sounds more an love with me than with you!”

“Ah...” Chu Zihang mumbled. “I forgot to tell you this is a conference call.”

I pressed the phone to my ear grinning. “Did you find Nono?” I turned to Lu Mingfei reflexively expecting him to share my joy but his blank expression brought me back to Earth.

He wouldn’t feel anything for Nono now.

“EVA has made defending Japan far easier. The Japan affiliates have gladly agreed to having me lead the school board from now on. I’ll be picking new members after this is over.”

The hard edge to his voice made my skin crawl. The fury in those blue eyes, as dangerous as bared fangs, appeared in my vision and I cringed. “Of course, I’ll go along with this.”

“I will nominate you, Carli. You have proved to be courageous and calm under the most intense pressure. You’ve managed to fight and foil the plans of the strongest forces in the party. You’ll be invaluable.”

Mingfei’s eyebrows raised at me. But I shook my head. “No... thank you for your generous offer. But after this, Zihang and I will retire...”

“I understand how you feel but my offer is firm and there will be a seat for you at the table whether you decide to sit in it or not.”

My mouth worked but nothing came out.

“The next order of business. Lu Mingfei. Is he a dragon king or not?”

“No. He’s not.” The words came out immediately. “He was created in the same laboratory facility as Chisei, Chime and Erii... in fact, he underwent the same procedure as Chime and Erii that split their personality and left him susceptible to the woodblock sound that made him lose control of his dragonblood. Chime used his Dreamworld skill to reunite his personality.”

“Reunite... his personality?” Zihang’s voice was soft but the subtle questioning tone was enough to pull at my heartstrings.

“That’s right Zihang, I know how much you care about Lu Mingfei, but that was only part of him. The Lu Mingfei we knew... wasn’t the real one. The one we knew is gone...”

Silence on all lines.

Caesar spoke first. “...unexpected. Does he remember anything of his past?”

“He remembers everything but...” I eyed him. He was still staring at me in close observation no doubt listening.

“In order to restore him to good standing with the party he will have to go through a thorough interrogation...”

“Well... if I expose the secret lab where he was, won’t that clear his name?”

“You know where it is?” Zihang finally spoke, but his voice was even and emotionless.

“Yes. I don’t know the exact coordinates, but I saw a vision in the dreamworld I can teleport to. Does my tracker still work?”

“Yes, I will get an immediate read on your location.”

“You put a tracker on your wife?” Caesar bellowed in outrage.

“Yes. Your job would have been a lot easier if you put a tracker on Nono.”

Caesar let out a bark of laughter before snarling. “And to think I considered putting you on the school board...”

“I must decline.”

“I didn’t offer!” Caesar shot back before addressing me again. “You’re going there now?”

“Yes... there’s someone there Mingfei needs to see. After that, I can finally come home.”

“Keep in contact.” Caesar ended the call abruptly.

I kept the phone to my ear, listening to the silence on the other end for several seconds. I worried that the news of Mingfei’s mental change was affecting Zihang so I didn’t address it. “How is Ru’Yi?”

“She’s fine. But, her Soul Skill is not Time Zero.”

“It’s not?”

“No. Enxi had to use her Soul skill to break down the train system and get us to Cassell... Ru’Yi also used it.”

“She has more than one?”

“No, it seems that she can use any Soul Skill she’s exposed to.”

My jaw dropped. “Oh... oh my god.”

“Yes. We probably shouldn’t tell anyone about her ability.”

“Yes. I agree.” My hand gripped the phone tightly. If anyone found out about this...

“Contact me as soon as you’re in the lab. Try and take photos. I have to go.”

“Okay... Love you.”

“...love you.”

I hung up and looked at Mingfei. 

He finally spoke. “I have questions. Caesar is now the head of the Cassell College.”

“Yes.”

“He holds you in high regard and insists you rule with him. But you refuse.”

“I have no interest.” I wanted nothing more than to go far away with Zihang and Ru’Yi and live a normal life. I wanted nothing to do with the filthy upper echelons of power among hybrids.

“Why?”

“Because there’s a saying... the scum rises to the top!” I leaned wearily against the cold metal of the truck.

“I have another question. Why did you lie and tell him I’m not a dragon king?” He asked.

“Are you a dragon king? Only if you act like it. If you act like a human, you are human. If I told them you were a dragon king, they would never treat you any different...” I folded my arms over my chest and looked away.

“No matter how I act, it doesn’t change what I am.”

I stomped my foot, and it reverberated the metal truck. “Yes it does! In Cassell, I learned that if the Dark King awakened it would bring forth a cataclysm! Millions of people would die! Human civilization would fall! Humans would be enslaved to dragons! Could you do that? Sure! But why let people define you? You’re the Dark King! You can be whatever you want! If you want to go on a tear and kill everyone, you’ve already proven that you can. If you want to turn me into a monster right now, you can! But you haven’t done that. You haven’t eaten Norton and Constantine.”

“Unless you actually do those things, you’re NOT the Dark King! Understand?” I raised my eyes to him. “If I had told him you were a dragon king, Caesar would have thought that he had no choice but to kill you. He would spare me because I’m a woman and still technically your wife in his eyes. He wouldn’t expect me to be loyal to the Cassell in the face of our supposed love.”

“But they would hunt you, corner you, and force you to fight. Hundreds... maybe thousands would die in the battle. You would die! The cataclysm would come even if you didn’t will it! You... and your power... it’s attracts and brings out the violence in people. It’s waiting to explode out! My story will cover your actions tonight, but if you continue to do what you’ve done, I can’t save you!”

I laughed. “We have another saying. ‘Only the Dark King or the New Dark King can kill the Dark King.’ And its true. The future is up to your choices from now on.”

He grunted softly and gripped the harpoon. He pulled it out, teeth gritting in pain until it was freed, it fell to the floor with a loud clang.  “I will have to eat Constantine to survive the mercury pool and rescue Z. It’s not because I’m a Dragon King. Constantine and Norton are dead. What happens to their bodies is not a moral dilemma.”

His scales fluttered up his arms and sparked with an emerald fire. The flames roared out from his hands and engulfed the body of Constantine. But no heat was coming from the flames and the body didn’t react like he was being burned. Instead it reacted as though it were being dissolved into crystal powder.

Alchemy! 

I’d had a vague sense of the practice from my studies at Cassell, but this was the first time I’d seen it performed by a dragon. What looked like sparkling dust surrounded Mingfei and settled between the iron-like scales on his hands and back and face.

The darkblue scales continued to spread round his body, covering him completely. He looked more lizard than ever. I half expected a forked tongue to come from his mouth.  The heat coming off him came over me, like I had opened the door of an oven.

I backed away as he approached and gripped the body of Norton in his clawed hands. He stalked toward me.

I couldn’t get out a protest. His hand was closed around arm burning my skin. I reacted automatically jerking away from him. He ignored my cries of pain. “Take me to Z.”

I struggled to concentrate, eyes sparking tears, but the images in my mind came without my wanting them to. The pillars, the hissing, steaming pools of mercury, the boy pinned to the cross.

I just wanted the burning to stop so I made the jump, clinging to that location in my mind. The dark and cold of the Nibelungen offered a welcome relief.

[btssmutficslovingfan01]

King of Love (Oneshot)

Summary: Ironically enough, the well known “king of love,” (Kim Seokjin) a popular matchmaker during the 1970’s, has a non existent love life but then he gets sent into the future, where he meets the love of his life.

Promised I’d release this! Wait no longer, sry if it’s bad/cringe I’m still new to writing bxb.

Pairing: Jin x (Male) Reader

Genre: Time Travel, Non-idol au, Fluff, Smut, Slight Angst

Warnings: Sir kink, creampie, fingering, blowjob, anal, Dom! Seokjin, Sub! Reader

Words: 4k+

______________________________________________

“You’re a star, Seokjin. A real star.” The happy couple walks out, hand in hand.

“You’ve done it again, you made them happy,” His assistant walks into the office, his short blond hair neatly trimmed. “And me.” The young man beams at his boss, as he takes a seat in his swivel chair in the corner and spins around.

“I take it the ring is a good sign?” Jin smirks at the blushing blond.

“Yeah. Yoongi’s treating me real well.” He replies under his breath.

“Promise rings this early? Wow, you must really like each other.” Jin stamps his paper, and he pushes his glasses further up the bridge of his nose.

“We do. I know we can’t have this kind of relationship in public but it’s thanks to you that I was even able to tell him how I felt in the first place. You’re so cool, Jin.” His assistant’s praise makes his cheeks turn pink and his eyes form small half-moons as he looks in the direction of the blond.

“You’re even cooler for finding clients and promoting me through your dad’s company.” Jin’s compliment has the man in tears, crying from joy. His dimples are fully visible under the dim-lit room as he smiles wide enough for the United States to see his shiny white teeth.

“Seriously, thanks a lot, Jin hyung.” The man locks eyes with him, just as his boyfriend walks in through the door.

“Yoongi,” He smiles at the older man, as he walks in through the door. 

“Seokjin. I see that you’ve certainly taken your work to another level,” Yoongi kicks aside a file from a previous client aside. “Perhaps this is too much, why don’t you take a break and try finding someone for yourself?” Jin freezes at the comment. He’d definitely thought of dating way back before he even became a matchmaker, but nothing worked out for him. All of the men he approached just ran away claiming he was too “narcissistic” and “self absorbed.” He loves himself, but every single guy he meets says he’s too selfish. So what? He has a stable career, money, a house, and a snazzy new car. He doesn’t need to date to be happy. But he has to admit, seeing his friends in love and holding hands and stealing kisses is kinda cute. Just a little bit. But nothing Jin wanted for himself-he just wanted to see people in love with his efforts, of course. Whether it’s a man or woman, a man and another man, or two women, Jin tries to keep everything fair and equal within his office. That’s why he has such high ratings. He has even been scouted by tv show producers to film a reality show about him, but he wanted to keep his business low on the radar, since some of what he was doing was illegal. He helped people run away before, and start lives anew. He’s even helped a couple prisoners escape, but that was only because he knew they were innocent. Seokjin is a good man. And his friends wanted someone else to see that too. A special person to change his life for the better

“I appreciate your concern, Yoongi. But I simply don’t have any interest in dating right now. Look at this, all of this research! Not only am I matchmaker, but I am also documenting human behavior. This is a study, Yoongi. I’d like nothing more than to dedicate the rest of my life to research.” Yoongi gawks at his friend as he sits down and begins scanning the papers, taking up every single detail with his eyes and ignoring him in the process.

“Let’s go have dinner. It’s getting late.” The younger man looks down at his worried boyfriend as he grabs his arms.

“This isn’t good for him. The King of Love not having a partner? It’s a bad image, Joon, a bad one I’m telling you!” Namjoon interrupts him with an abrupt kiss. Yoongi blushes before being dragged away from the office, to a nearby restaurant. 

“He’s right, you know?” A deep voice resounds through the room.

“Taehyung? What are you doing here?” Jin looks at his younger brother as the man with wondrous grey eyes strolls into the office.

“I’m trying to convince you to get some pussy. Leave before it gets too dark. You know how there’s a curfew now.” His eyes darken as he takes a breath and grabs a folder from the desk.

“That can’t be the reason why you’re here.”

“You’re right. Give me some money,” Seokjin raises an eyebrow at his brother in disbelief. “Just kidding, I just wanted to see you again.” He smiles warmly and Jin sighs in relief. He almost panicked for a moment; almost.

“Aw, you’re so cute for coming to see my handsome face today, but I have to really work on this report, alright?” When Taehyung refuses to move, Jin stands up and starts pushing him, trying to get the younger male to leave the room. “I’ll...talk...to...you...when...I...get...home.” Jin gasps for air after he practically pushed his brother out, surprised by the brute force of the man. He was not aware of Taehyung’s raw power. He must’ve bulked up a lot more from the last time they saw each other.

He sits back down at his desk and begins writing.

“Love is not over until the two parties decide it is officially over. Even when broken up, a boyfriend may still possess some sort of control over his former girlfriend and they go through this phase of denial where neither of them want to admit that they are still in love while they are trying to move on.” He sighs before writing again. “The proper way to break off a relationship is by healing. People may use this time to talk to new people, explore their life as a single person, etc. However, it is never good to distance oneself fully. People are usually attracted to someone they see a lot, perhaps a coworker or classmate. But then they are less likely to be attracted to someone they don’t see very much. Distancing oneself from their ex-lover requires discipline, and harmony between the body and mind. They must be able to stand in the same room without feeling anything. Most issues arise in a breakup when two partners physically separate themselves for a period of time right after the breakup, but then when they see each other after that, the feelings come back. All of the moments and precious feelings arise and they both are back at square one. But then they must consider the reason for why they broke up. Was it worth it? Was it unhealthy? They need to know what’s best for them, individually, and grow from there.” Seokjin yawns as he finishes writing his 45 minute piece, setting his pen down and resting his head on the surface of his hard wooden desk. He closes his eyes briefly, seeing a flicker of light from the corner of his eye.

He sees it again, except this time it’s brighter, bluer, clearer. He stands up, inching towards the door that leads to the hallway. He opens it, finding a man standing directly outside of his room, one hand up, his palm facing Seokjin. Blue dust surrounds him, glittering magically and making Jin’s eyes widen in awe. He looks up and recognizes the face.

“Again, I’ll say it--you need a boyfriend.” Yoongi pushes his palm towards Jin, and Seokjin is thrusted against the wall, his head thudding against the wall as he sank deeper and deeper into the floor.

Seokjin awakens to find himself right outside of his office, except it’s a lot more different now. The hallway is cleaner, and there are more people. The first thing he notices is that the door no longer says “Kim Seokjin.” It says “Men’s Restroom.” What could Jin be doing in front of a bathroom? He remembers the weird flash of light outside of his office and then he woke up here. He shrugs and begins to walk towards the waiting room, where his next clients would be waiting. He doesn’t bother with changing or brushing his teeth; he is a very busy man.

“Mr. Ford, your appointment is scheduled for Saturday, the 14th.” He overhears a receptionist speaking. That’s strange, he didn’t recall hiring a woman on staff.

“Thank you, I will see you then, Linda.” Linda? He doesn’t know anyone with that name.

“Y/N?” He sees you look up at the sound of your own name, as you quickly pick up your book before running to the desk.

“You said they do therapy here, right? Like not massages, but with a chaise, and a person to talk to?” Jin listens in on the conversation, hiding behind a plant.

“Yes, uhhhh, let’s see, Dr. Harry is busy, and so is Patricia, let me see if-”

“I’ll take him!” Jin finds himself moving before even thinking. “Dr. Seokjin, I’m a local therapist working in...Kim Enterprises.” 

“Never heard of a Dr. Seokjin.” The receptionist simply blinks twice before nodding. “Okay, you can go.” She slightly winks at him before letting him walk you towards the direction of his old office.

“Um, do you work here?” You ask.

“Yes. I’m actually a matchmaker, but I also study human behavior.” He truthfully explains it to you.

“Thanks for agreeing to help me. I’ve just been stressed about life, you know?” Jin nods, as he guides you to a seemingly empty room, with a bed, a chair, and a setup of a typical Doctor’s office.

“Lie down here. You can tell me about your troubles. Everything is confidential and safe with me.” Jin reassures you. You simply give him a smile and follow his instructions.

“Let me see...so my day started out great but then my mom called me and told me about how she’s disappointed that she had a son like me and she wishes she had a daughter instead, and then my father stole some money from me last month, that was bad. And just a couple hours ago, I found out that my best friend died in a car accident.” Jin’s eyes widen as you pour out your feelings. He’s mostly surprised with the trust you have in him, as if you already know what kind of person he is and enough about him to tell him all of these private things.

“I’m sorry. On a scale of one to ten, one being the best and ten being the worst, how do you feel right now, emotionally?” Your eyes glistening with tears as you try not to cry.

“Ten thousand,” Jin wipes a couple of your tears before reaching into his pocket and handing you a handkerchief. “You have a custom handkerchief?” You ask him after realizing his initials were stitched into the fabric.

“Yep. I always carry it, it’s like my good luck charm.” He winks at you as you laugh, the direness of the moment wearing off as you speak to Jin. 

“I wish I had something like that. So, didn’t you say you were a matchmaker?” You try changing the subject, now focusing more on the incredibly handsome man in front of you.

“Yes, I am. I normally help clients get the person of their desires, confess, or sometimes, even mend struggling relationships.”

“That sounds like a bunch of jobs smushed together.” You tap your chin as you fall deep in thought.

“It’s the 70’s, so they have one person do all the doctor’s work.” Seokjin gives you another charming smile.

“Haha, you might be right about the doctor’s wor—wait did you say 70’s?” You ask, making sure you weren’t tripping on acid.

“Yes. Is there something wrong, Sir?” He asks, his tongue running along his plump lips.

“It’s 2019. Why are you referencing the 70’s out of nowhere?” Jin’s face turns as white as a sheet. He looks like a ghost. You watch as the poor man excuses himself to the restroom, and how he fails at trying to conceal his panic around you. It’s actually kind of adorable, in a way.

Meanwhile, Jin splashes water onto his face, trying to make sense of the situation. 2019. He said 2019. There’s no way that could be true unless--last night was not a dream. Yoongi actually did magic and cast a spell on him that made him come to the future. Jin was still unsure but the room he is standing in is proof enough, that he traveled in time. He now has to break it to you, tell you the reason he is actually here. You might run away like the others, but it’s his job to be honest with his clients. It may be one of the hardest things about being a matchmaker. His job is very much like a doctor’s, as he can’t promise good results 100% of the time, but he can make assumptions on the “diagnosis” and process reasons for failure. 

“You aren’t from around here, are you?” Your words astonish Jin, as he walks back into the room and closes the door behind him.

“What do you know?” You fold your arms and lean back into the wall, your feet a couple inches off the ground.

“I know you aren’t a doctor, and you used the term “matchmaker” which means broker in this day and age, but back in the 70’s it was basically a glorified therapist.” You smirk as Jin’s mouth opens wide and he gawks at you, eyes twitching.

“H-h-how…?” The only thing he could think of was: witchcraft. Except you whip out your phone and prove him wrong.

“I’m not stupid, you know. We have something called the internet, which allows us to search anything up.” Jin grabs your cell phone and presses the buttons, surprised that your screen was responding to his touch, and that he could do so much with just hovering his fingers above the keys.  

“A typewriter.” He gasps.

“A digital typewriter.” You gently take the phone out of his hands, laughing at his adorable demeanor as he recites the word “digital” like an incantation.

“Since you know what’s going on, I need to ask: when can I go back?” You look at him with confusion.

“What do you mean? I just figured you were cosplaying.” Your words astonish him, since he had never heard of the term.

“No! I am from 1972, and I work here, the King of Love? Ever heard of him? It’s me. I’m Kim Seokjin.” He tries to explain it but you simply wave him off.

“I don’t believe you’re from the 70’s.” You simply state, shutting him down completely.

“What can I do to make you believe me?” He asks.

“Vocab.” You snicker, knowing the man is sure to fail now.

“I have no idea what you’re trying to say. If anything, it looks like I’m the one who is in need of assistance.” His quality of speaking is very different from any other man’s voice you’ve heard, and it makes him sound sincere and more trustworthy.

“Look, bro, I needed a therapy sesh. Not some weird time travel shit. Now can we please--”

“That is not very appropriate, correct yourself.” His sudden command silences you, as you stare him down, a blush settling on your cheeks.

“Y-yes sir. I apologize for my use of profane language.” You feel strangely aroused, as Seokjin circles around you, making you feel slightly inferior to him.

“Good boy.” He smirks as your gaze falls down to his shoes, and you admire how neat it looks. Wow, it almost looks like an original pair. But you can’t get too distracted. “Maybe if you’re good for me, I’ll give you a reward?” You nod slightly as he scans your body, mentally undressing you with his eyes. He steps forward, and before you know it, his lips are on yours, pink, plush, velvety lips pressing against your skin. You’re burning up, and he’s doing this to you.

“Seokjin, please.” You whine as his fingers make their way down your jeans, unbuttoning them and sliding them down your bulge through your boxers.

“Please what?” He teases, repeating the gesture a couple times until you’re grinding against his hand, waiting for something to happen as you rutted against him lewdly.

“Please sir. Please make me cum with your fingers.” You mewl as he kisses you roughly, and his hands squeeze your ass lightly. “F-fuck.” You gasp as he spanks you with aggression.

“Take it off your clothes. I want your entire outfit on the ground. Right now.” You find yourself mesmerized by his authority, as you quickly obey his command, and you strip for him as he scans you. He was truly the most beautiful man alive, at least in this time period. You wonder if there are other attractive men in his time period. But then again, the really attractive ones usually don’t come around very often. He may be one of the exceptions.

“Sir...your fingers!” You look up to see that his eyes are filled with lust, all the compassion and softness gone. All that’s left is a lustful version of him, with hunger. Hunger for sex.

“On the bed, on all fours, right now.” Your eyes widen as your body moves on its own and you lie sprawled out for Seokjin, as your therapist stretches out your asshole with his long fingers. You shudder from his warm touch, unusually comfortable as he takes care of you.

“You’re such a good little boy, with an ass like this, you’re surely bound for great things.” What’s that supposed to mean?

“Um, thanks…?” Your entire body clenches as Seokjin adds a finger, and you let out a painful whimper as Seokjin proceeds to thrust his fingers in at an irregular pace.

“No problem.” He licks the rim, puckered and red for him, and he tests it once again, pumping his fingers in once more.

“Ah, fuck!” You cry out in pain.

“Shhh, it’ll be over soon,” He reassures you, kissing your ass before turning you over for a long kiss. “Are you ready?” He hovers over you, and you gulp as his dick aligns with your hole. You press another kiss to his lips before nodding, and allowing Jin to slide into you by lifting your legs up high and making your hole visible to him.

“Nice and tight. You’re so warm, wow Y/N, I don’t think I can go back. After feeling this ass, there’s no one I’d rather be with.” You were confused at this point, as well as aroused, very aroused. You thought this was a one-time thing, but Jin sounds like he wants more. You don’t care, though, it was probably in the heat of the moment.

“AHHHHH!!!” You let out the most sinful moans as he thrusts into you, his skin slapping against yours, making you scream from pain and pleasure. Jin moans predominantly from the tightness of your ass, and how despite prepping you, your body was still reacting to him in ways that were unexpected. You love this, it’s too good.

“I’m gonna cum, and fill up your ass.” Jin says, the filthy language making your dick erect once more. You never were soft with him.

“Do it, cum in my ass and make me your bitch, sir.” You smirk, challenging Jin as he flips you over, and changes positions. You close your eyes as he begins pounding into you, your ass in pain but it’s so worth it when he cums.

“Y/N…” He groans, pulling out and releasing the rest of his load onto your back. Shortly after, you have your own climax, cumming uncontrollably after seeing Jin reach his high. He kisses you passionately, wiping a tear from your eye. One more time, he slips into you as you climb on top of him. He watches you with a smile as you bounce on his cock, his balls slapping your ass you went up and down. Your ass is basically numb at this point, from being spanked so much. And your dick is pointing straight up, as Jin rubs it between his hands, up and down like how you were moving. You start moving quickly, now the two of you moaning each other’s names like madmen. You slow down when he cums again, making sure the cum filled you up for good this time. This time he continues moving, making you scream out in pleasure, loud enough for all the people in the building to hear. No other man has ever been able to make you orgasm like he could, you know in your heart that Seokjin must be the one.

“Did that hurt?” He asks, all of the lust disappearing from his voice and being replaced with compassion.

“Just a little at first, but it was fun.” You moan as he kisses your back, his plump pink lips leaving a thin layer of saliva as he does.

“You’re very tight, you know? I could warm my dick in there for hours and it still wouldn’t be enough.” You blush at his romantic words. No man has ever been so soft with you, sure you liked it rough since you were a guy, but you also had a strong attraction to the more feminine side of men. That’s how you found out you were gay. You dated girls that looked more like men, and then eventually had your first experience with a guy. Sure, you weren’t focused on finding a relationship at the moment, but tender-hearted Seokjin is the perfect man in your eyes.

“Mmmm, I have to go back now. I see the light.” Jin moves away from you unexpectedly, making your skin go cold as you wrap your arms around yourself.

“N-now?”

“Yes, but just know that I think you’re pretty cool. Any guy would be lucky to have you. Take care of yourself, Y/N.”

“Okay Jin. When will you be back?” You ask, hoping for the perfect answer.

“Never.”

***

It had been about two weeks since Seokjin left the future, and work was as dull as ever. After his experience with you, he couldn’t stop thinking about the future. How you could’ve possibly been pregnant after he released his seed in you twice (Yes Male pregnancy is a huge problem in this world) Yoongi and Namjoon hated seeing him like this, Taehyung even tried cheering him up with pink cupcakes but the only thing he could think of was his princess.

“He’s miserable.” Namjoon sighs.

“I wish we could help him.” Taehyung frowns.

“Maybe we can…” Yoongi wiggles his fingers and lets out a giggle.

Ten minutes later, Seokjin hears a knock on the door.

“Come in.” Even the enthusiasm is gone from his voice.

“Did anyone call for a therapist?” The shock on Jin’s face when he sees you is laughable.

“Y/N!” He runs to you, pressing endless kisses to your face. “I missed you so much, my prince.”

“I missed you too, Jinnie.” Your nickname for him makes him smile. 

“It’s been too long.” He slowly moves down, kissing every inch of your body. He looks up at you for permission before removing your pants. He looks at your lace panties and pulls at the band. 

“Dirty boy.” He strips off your underwear and leaves you to stare at your own rising erection, making your cheeks flush and your pores open up to sweat.

“Ahhhh, Seokjin.” You close your eyes as the slurping noise resounds, bouncing off the walls and letting everyone in the building know how well Seokjin fucks you. He continues rubbing your cock between his hands as he takes you into his mouth.

“Cum in my throat, baby.” He demands. Your body shudders and you let out another moan as you have an orgasm. Jin licks you clean and then you lean in to kiss him.

“This time, I’ll be the one who stays.” You say, yanking his tie off.

[dammitadolfnomorecake]

Blood Red Heat prt 32

For a moment, Keith found the world black, before the sound of party poppers hit his ears and his sense of sight returned. Confetti and streamers falling from above were the least of his worries. All his emotions pushed to the extreme at the scene in front of him.

He was in Bob’s fucking stupid game show studio. Around him, the black shadows of the audience were cheering. In front of him Bob was in his ridiculous floating chair... Keith wanting nothing more to fly into a rage and punch the green bastard squarely in the jaw, because, seriously, what the fuck was this.

Behind Bob stood the pack, Lance dressed in his blue armour, with Pike now placed in what looked like one of the castles healing pods. Despite the presence of their team, the light behind their eyes was black and vacant, as if in a state of sleep walking. And behind them stood two giant gameshow wheels, one with the character names on it, the other with different scenarios. Keith staggered on the spot. All of this... all of this was some kind... some kind of fucking game?! This was their lives... the games show... he’d broken Lance’s heart to pieces... and now, Bob?

“What the fuck?”

Moved by some invisible force, Keith was pulled to the front of the stage to stand by Bob, he wanted so bad to punch him, but his body didn’t move

“Welcome back! Who would have thought after their last disastrous performance, we’d see such an overwhelming display of friendship. Let’s give it up for everybody’s favourite Paladins!”

The audience cheered. The lights of the studio blinded Keith, unable to see anything past the edge of the stage. Maybe it was a good thing he couldn’t speak or move now...

“Yes, our favourite Paladin are back! After our last episode, we were inundated with your messages. We heard you! I heard you! Now let’s talk to the man of the hour, Black Paladin Keith!”

Cheering again for him, Keith blinked, then blinked again in surprise that he’d been able to blink

“Keith, you’ve been through a lot. How do you feel this affected your relationship with Lance... Any chance we’ll be expecting baaaaaaby Paladins any time soon?”

Bob winked at him. Keith saw red all over again

“What the fuck?!”

Chuckling, Bob’s chair floated backwards from him

“I think the shock must have gotten the better of him!”

Keith went to move to grab Bob, his body didn’t listen... the wanker had only given him enough use of his body to reply and blink?!

“Seriously, what the fuck is all of this?!”

Bob chuckled, the audience laughing along

“Isn’t he a riot? We’ve never had such ratings before, and with poor Lance feeling so outcast, we all felt it was our need to bring your feelings to light!”

“How is that any of your business?!”

“It becomes my business when the fate of the universe is at stake! Voltron could never hope to defeat all those evil doers out there without being a united front!”

“So you tried to kill Lance?! We should kill you!”

“Whoops, folks! I think I’ve made him mad! Let’s look back at what happened the last time we had the Paladins grace us with their presence!”

The two gameshow wheels dropped into the floor, a screen coming down. The first few seconds counted in the movie, like the really old movies back on Earth. Under the influence of Bob, Keith was turned on the spot, watching that “scene”. That scene when Keith had crushed any ounce of confidence left within Lance. “I just don’t wanna be stuck here for eternity with Lance”. He deserved the booing that the audience gave him. With his not so finest hour broadcast to... wherever this shit was televised, Keith’s cheeks burned with shame. He’d been so cruel to the man who’d always had his back. Who’d supported him when Shiro had gone missing. Some team leader he was.

“Yes, yes! Our young Red Paladin was crushed! But I knew better! I could see inside their minds”

Bob wriggled his fingers, like they did on Earth when talking of vaguely spooky things. Keith cutting in

“I know I fucked up! I would have taken those words back if I could have!”

And Bob ignoring him

“This episode stuck with me. I found myself saying “Bob. Bob, my man, can we really leave the universe to such a divided team? A Red Paladin who was falling apart. A Black Paladin who broke his heart. Of course we couldn’t!”

Keith had already hit near apocalyptic rage

“Do I not get a chance to defend myself here?!”

With a click of his fingers, Keith found a dummy in his mouth and the inability to spit the thing out

“The only thing for it was a dashing love story where our two heroes finally revealed what they meant to each other! Let’s bring him around, please give a big round of applause for Laaaaaance!”

God, no. This was too cruel. Lance slowly raised his head, showing him those blue eyes he’d missed so much. The crowd cheered for Lance as Lance looked terrified beneath the burning lights.

“Hush, hush! I know you’re all as excited as I am! Our two star crossed lovers, finally reunited on screen! No one could have written a better love story, except for I!”

Bob laughed obnoxiously. Keith shook. Lance wanted to move, but all Bob had done was awaken him to this freakfest. Catching the Red Paladin’s eye, Lance’s pretty blue eyes welled with tears of guilt. Shit. Fuck. It felt like a thousand poisoned thorns were being shoved down Keith’s throat. The guilt choking him alive. Lance had never asked for his cruelness

“Awww, I think he missed him!”

The audience letting out a long “aw”. Bob might be a god, and sure, killing Zarkon then pissing off Lotor had been hard enough, but Keith wasn’t about trying to slay a god.

“I said to myself, Bob, when was the last time our Lance was truly happy? Was it when Keith returned?! No! Keith ignored him! Was it on the game show?! No! Then it hit me. Monster and Mana. Monsters and Mana where no one noticed the pain he hid so plainly with his vanishing character! What a perfect setting! What if Pike was cast into a world? What if Lance was cast as Pike, the dorky thief that felt outcast?! What if we watched as Lance found his way out of that doom and gloom, and I must say, the results speak for themselves! We’ve been treated to a feast of angst. And that twist with the pearl?! Lance’s experiences gathering into something tangible?! The more he found his way back, the more he struggled to keep his head high as show the depths of his forgiveness, with his dashing boyfriend there to show him what true love feels like... Marvellous! We’ve seen good times and we’ve seen bad times! It’s been a rating bonanza!”

Keith wanted to vomit. The game was punishment for all of them. They’d all fucked up. They’d all let themselves fall prey to the delights of space

“With love and courage, we’ve watched these two fall in love, and wasn’t it glorious!?”

The crowd cheered wildly. Bob chuckled, before waving his hand to bring the cheering back down to silence

“I know! I know! I sat there and I listened. I listened to the things the Red Paladin said about himself. I watched as he died to save the Paladin who’d replaced him! And what did he get?! A broken heart! No! No I couldn’t accept that!”

Pressing a button on his remote, a dummy version of Lotor dropped from the ceiling. It’s eyes black crosses, clearly denoting a dead Lotor

“Why must he go through so much pain when the one he loved the most was too stupid to see him?! Then, the chance came! Our Red Paladin was on his last legs! A red heat setting in, threatening to claim his life. Now was the time!”

The crowd gasped, Keith tried to fight being held in place. He wanted to comfort Lance. None of this was right. Lance... he didn’t deserve this. Keith did. He’d been the narrow minded arsehole whole pushed Lance away rather than admitting he cared about him.

“None of us could have expected the adventure we’ve been on! Let’s give it up for our star couple!”

Lance and Keith both moved, forced to stand next to each other. They were so close. If Keith could just move his little finger he could loop it around Lance’s. What Lance must be thinking... Keith could almost hear the omega’s heart breaking in guilt

“Take a bow!”

They were forced to. Bob’s chuckling suddenly turned serious, kind as if when he spoke, they were the only ones to hear his words

“Without my intervention, all hope for the future would have been lost. You’re both profoundly young. Stupidity can only excuse so much. Don’t make me step in for a third time or you will not like the results...”

Bob’s tone snapped back to what it’d been before, smile back on his

“And with that, the Voltron Show comes to the end! I know! We’ve all been on the edge of our seats for so long! But these brave heroes must get back! They have a long journey before them. Give it up for Keith and Lance!”

As the crowd cheered wildly, and confetti fell from above again, Keith’s world swam. His stomach felt like he’d gone hurtling out of control as the world dropped away around him. Bob’s voice echoed in his ears, barely a whisper above the sound of his pounding heart “If you hadn’t followed, all would have been lost to you forever”

*

Bob could have been gentler with the awakening part. Keith felt smacked in the face as his alpha roared back to consciousness. Gripping his head, several long moments passed as everything sank in. He was back. They were out the game. He was back... Lance?!

“Careful there, number two! You’ve given us quite the scare”

Letting his hands drop, Keith blinked. The alpha’s eyes gritty from sleep. His hands felt... weird. As if this was him waking up in the game, rather than him waking up in the right reality

“Lance?!”

He had to know. His question coming out surprisingly loud for someone who’d been basically comatose

“He’s resting. His fever has broken and the bleeding stopped. Whatever happened to the pair of you? It’s been a full day since the others awoke”

A day? How could it have been a day. Turning in the direction of Coran’s voice, there was Lance. His blue eyes open...

“Lance... I...”

Lance silently tried to tell him something. The distance between them felt too much for him. He could have lost Lance. He’d let his hand slip from his and that could have been their last memory together. Keith finding his body awkward to move, reduced to crawling across the short distance to where his omega lay. Taking Lance’s hand in his hand, he was so fucking grateful to see those blue eyes open. His alpha so beyond relieved to see their mate was coming back to them. He’d been in a rut while he’d slept, Keith able to smell both he and Lance so thickly it was nearly suffocating. Lance now had the guilt of what had happened on top of being deathly ill. Thank god that the others had made themselves scarce

“Shhh, it’s okay. It’s okay... we’re awake again”

Weakly Lance tried to lift his arm, Keith taking his hand and raising it to his chest so Lance couldn’t let their hold go. He was going to have to be the cool and collected one. The one Lance could depend on, instead it being the other way around

“We’re here. We made it out”

“I’m... sorry... so... sorry”

Exhausted to the point of slurring, Lance’s scent took on hues of rotting citrus, Keith’s alpha interpreting it as like the worst scent ever. Even worse than Lance’s scent in red heat

“Shhh. I’ve got you. I’ve got you... your alpha’s got you”

Nothing outside of holding Lance close mattered, or really existed. Coran forgotten in the background already

“I... hurt...”

“Shhhh... I know you do, omega. Your alpha’s here. Your alpha’s got you... shhhh...”

The thrill of calling himself Lance’s alpha was dulled by his worry. Lance had grown so sickly while they’d been trapped in the game. As much as he hated that green fucking lump of snot, Bob must have worked some kind of godly magic to keep Lance from passing away. If they ever met again, it’d be far too soon for Keith’s liking. Lance needed rest. He needed love. More than his heart was broken, what he’d been through had devastated his body and mind.

“Number two...”

Snarling at Coran caused Lance to whimper, Keith trying to shift his scent to something more calming as he hushed Lance again. Stupid Coran. No. Not stupid Coran. Coran would have worked tirelessly to keep them all alive, especially the love of his life

“I’ve got him”

“If I may...”

He didn’t want to shut Coran out, but... but there was just so much in his head that he didn’t know which string of thought to follow, not when things were so knotted up

“Coran, I can’t... my alpha... my omega... He needs all of me right now”

Lance could still take a turn for the worst if he didn’t handle this right. Shiro had said only being knotted would save Lance from a red heat. Lance now so frail that he could not only give consent, but even if he did, Keith would never lay hands on him in this state

“What do you need, Keith?”

Accepting he was out of his depth, Coran told him so by using his name

“I need to focus on him. Please can you take care of the pack a little longer?”

“Keith, you’ve barely woken”

He should have been as limp and weak as Lance. This wasn’t a TV show where sleeping for weeks had no side effects. Shifting Lance to prepare to try lifting him, his alpha reassured him that moving Lance was the right step

“Let’s just say a green wanker seems to have helped... Lance, I’m so sorry for what I said. I was dumb. I am dumb. You’re the glue that holds the pack together”

Coran sniffled, missing what it meant for him to be calling Lance his omega

“What a beautiful display friendship!”

Nope. He wasn’t going to there. Coran sounded too much like Bob, any longer and he was going to start wondering if they really had made it back to their reality

“I’m going to help Lance clean up. Tell the team I’ll talk to them once things settle”

If they settled. No. He wasn’t going there either. They all knew they’d messed up, they’d all admitted their faults. Once Lance got over his embarrassment, they’d all sit down and have a good talk... especially over how Bob had nearly stolen Lance away from them and not the game malfunctioning.

[lightinhersmile]

PERSONALITY TYPE: ENFJ-A

[ For more detail, click READ MORE. ]

Introduction

Everything you do right now ripples outward and affects everyone. Your posture can shine your heart or transmit anxiety. Your breath can radiate love or muddy the room in depression. Your glance can awaken joy. Your words can inspire freedom. Your every act can open hearts and minds.

Protagonists are natural-born leaders, full of passion and charisma. Forming around two percent of the population, they are oftentimes our politicians, our coaches and our teachers, reaching out and inspiring others to achieve and to do good in the world. With a natural confidence that begets influence, Protagonists take a great deal of pride and joy in guiding others to work together to improve themselves and their community.

Firm Believers in the People

People are drawn to strong personalities, and Protagonists radiate authenticity, concern and altruism, unafraid to stand up and speak when they feel something needs to be said. They find it natural and easy to communicate with others, especially in person, and their Intuitive (N) trait helps people with the Protagonist personality type to reach every mind, be it through facts and logic or raw emotion. Protagonists easily see people’s motivations and seemingly disconnected events, and are able to bring these ideas together and communicate them as a common goal with an eloquence that is nothing short of mesmerizing.

The interest Protagonists have in others is genuine, almost to a fault – when they believe in someone, they can become too involved in the other person’s problems, place too much trust in them. Luckily, this trust tends to be a self-fulfilling prophecy, as Protagonists’ altruism and authenticity inspire those they care about to become better themselves. But if they aren’t careful, they can overextend their optimism, sometimes pushing others further than they’re ready or willing to go.

Protagonists are vulnerable to another snare as well: they have a tremendous capacity for reflecting on and analyzing their own feelings, but if they get too caught up in another person’s plight, they can develop a sort of emotional hypochondria, seeing other people’s problems in themselves, trying to fix something in themselves that isn’t wrong. If they get to a point where they are held back by limitations someone else is experiencing, it can hinder Protagonists’ ability to see past the dilemma and be of any help at all. When this happens, it’s important for Protagonists to pull back and use that self-reflection to distinguish between what they really feel, and what is a separate issue that needs to be looked at from another perspective.

...The Struggle Ought Not to Deter Us From the Support of a Cause We Believe to Be Just

Protagonists are genuine, caring people who talk the talk and walk the walk, and nothing makes them happier than leading the charge, uniting and motivating their team with infectious enthusiasm.

People with the Protagonist personality type are passionate altruists, sometimes even to a fault, and they are unlikely to be afraid to take the slings and arrows while standing up for the people and ideas they believe in. It is no wonder that many famous Protagonists are cultural or political icons – this personality type wants to lead the way to a brighter future, whether it’s by leading a nation to prosperity, or leading their little league softball team to a hard-fought victory.

Strengths & Weaknesses

Protagonist Strengths

Tolerant – Protagonists are true team players, and they recognize that that means listening to other peoples’ opinions, even when they contradict their own. They admit they don’t have all the answers, and are often receptive to dissent, so long as it remains constructive.

Reliable – The one thing that galls Protagonists the most is the idea of letting down a person or cause they believe in. If it’s possible, Protagonists can always be counted on to see it through.

Charismatic – Charm and popularity are qualities Protagonists have in spades. They instinctively know how to capture an audience, and pick up on mood and motivation in ways that allow them to communicate with reason, emotion, passion, restraint – whatever the situation calls for. Talented imitators, Protagonists are able to shift their tone and manner to reflect the needs of the audience, while still maintaining their own voice.

Altruistic – Uniting these qualities is Protagonists’ unyielding desire to do good in and for their communities, be it in their own home or the global stage. Warm and selfless, Protagonists genuinely believe that if they can just bring people together, they can do a world of good.

Natural Leaders – More than seeking authority themselves, Protagonists often end up in leadership roles at the request of others, cheered on by the many admirers of their strong personality and positive vision.

Protagonist Weaknesses

Overly Idealistic – People with the Protagonist personality type can be caught off guard as they find that, through circumstance or nature, or simple misunderstanding, people fight against them and defy the principles they’ve adopted, however well-intentioned they may be. They are more likely to feel pity for this opposition than anger, and can earn a reputation of naïveté.

Too Selfless – Protagonists can bury themselves in their hopeful promises, feeling others’ problems as their own and striving hard to meet their word. If they aren’t careful, they can spread themselves too thin, and be left unable to help anyone.

Too Sensitive – While receptive to criticism, seeing it as a tool for leading a better team, it’s easy for Protagonists to take it a little too much to heart. Their sensitivity to others means that Protagonists sometimes feel problems that aren’t their own and try to fix things they can’t fix, worrying if they are doing enough.

Fluctuating Self-Esteem – Protagonists define their self-esteem by whether they are able to live up to their ideals, and sometimes ask for criticism more out of insecurity than out of confidence, always wondering what they could do better. If they fail to meet a goal or to help someone they said they’d help, their self-confidence will undoubtedly plummet.

Struggle to Make Tough Decisions – If caught between a rock and a hard place, Protagonists can be stricken with paralysis, imagining all the consequences of their actions, especially if those consequences are humanitarian.

Romantic Relationships

People who share the Protagonist personality type feel most at home when they are in a relationship, and few types are more eager to establish a loving commitment with their chosen partners. Protagonists take dating and relationships seriously, selecting partners with an eye towards the long haul, rather than the more casual approach that might be expected from some types in the Explorer Role group. There’s really no greater joy for Protagonists than to help along the goals of someone they care about, and the interweaving of lives that a committed relationship represents is the perfect opportunity to do just that.

I’m a Slow Walker, but I Never Walk Back

Even in the dating phase, people with the Protagonist personality type are ready to show their commitment by taking the time and effort to establish themselves as dependable, trustworthy partners.

Their Intuitive (N) trait helps them to keep up with the rapidly shifting moods that are common early in relationships, but Protagonists will still rely on conversations about their mutual feelings, checking the pulse of the relationship by asking how things are, and if there’s anything else they can do. While this can help to keep conflict, which Protagonists abhor, to a minimum, they also risk being overbearing or needy – Protagonists should keep in mind that sometimes the only thing that’s wrong is being asked what’s wrong too often.

Protagonists don’t need much to be happy, just to know that their partner is happy, and for their partner to express that happiness through visible affection. Making others’ goals come to fruition is often the chiefest concern of Protagonists, and they will spare no effort in helping their partner to live the dream. If they aren’t careful though, Protagonists’ quest for their partners’ satisfaction can leave them neglecting their own needs, and it’s important for them to remember to express those needs on occasion, especially early on.

You Cannot Escape the Responsibility of Tomorrow by Evading It Today

Protagonists’ tendency to avoid any kind of conflict, sometimes even sacrificing their own principles to keep the peace, can lead to long-term problems if these efforts never fully resolve the underlying issues that they mask. On the other hand, people with the Protagonist personality type can sometimes be too preemptive in resolving their conflicts, asking for criticisms and suggestions in ways that convey neediness or insecurity. Protagonists invest their emotions wholly in their relationships, and are sometimes so eager to please that it actually undermines the relationship – this can lead to resentment, and even the failure of the relationship. When this happens, Protagonists experience strong senses of guilt and betrayal, as they see all their efforts slip away.

If potential partners appreciate these qualities though, and make an effort themselves to look after the needs of their Protagonist partners, they will enjoy long, happy, passionate relationships. Protagonists are known to be dependable lovers, perhaps more interested in routine and stability than spontaneity in their sex lives, but always dedicated to the selfless satisfaction of their partners. Ultimately, Protagonist personality types believe that the only true happiness is mutual happiness, and that’s the stuff successful relationships are made of.

Friendships

When it comes to friendships, Protagonists are anything but passive. While some personality types may accept the circumstantial highs and lows of friendship, their feelings waxing and waning with the times, Protagonists will put active effort into maintaining these connections, viewing them as substantial and important, not something to let slip away through laziness or inattention.

This philosophy of genuine connection is core to the Protagonist personality type, and while it is visible in the workplace and in romance, it is clearest in the breadth and depth of Protagonist friendships.

All My Life I Have Tried to Pluck a Thistle and Plant a Flower Wherever the Flower Would Grow...

People with the Protagonist personality type take genuine pleasure in getting to know other people, and have no trouble talking with people of all types and modes of thought. Even in disagreement, other perspectives are fascinating to Protagonists – though like most people, they connect best with individuals who share their principles and ideals, and types in Diplomat and Analyst Role groups are best able to explore Protagonists’ viewpoints with them, which are simply too idealistic for most. It is with these closest friends that Protagonists will truly open up, keeping their many other connections in a realm of lighthearted but genuine support and encouragement.

Others truly value their Protagonist friends, appreciating the warmth, kindness, and sincere optimism and cheer they bring to the table. Protagonists want to be the best friends possible, and it shows in how they work to find out not just the superficial interests of their friends, but their strengths, passions, hopes and dreams. Nothing makes Protagonists happier than to see the people they care about do well, and they are more than happy to take their own time and energy to help make it happen.

We Should Be Too Big to Take Offense, and Too Noble to Give It

While Protagonists enjoy lending this helping hand, other personality types may simply not have the energy or drive to keep up with it – creating further strain, people with the Protagonist personality type can become offended if their efforts aren’t reciprocated when the opportunity arises. Ultimately, Protagonists’ give and take can become stifling to types who are more interested in the moment than the future, or who simply have Identities that rest firmly on the Assertive side, making them content with who they are and uninterested in the sort of self-improvement and goal-setting that Protagonists hold so dear.

When this happens Protagonist personalities can be critical, if they believe it necessary. While usually tactful and often helpful, if their friend is already annoyed by Protagonists’ attempts to push them forward, it can simply cause them to dig in their heels further. Protagonists should try to avoid taking this personally when it happens, and relax their inflexibility into an occasional “live and let live” attitude.

Ultimately though, Protagonists will find that their excitement and unyielding optimism will yield them many satisfying relationships with people who appreciate and share their vision and authenticity. The joy Protagonists take in moving things forward means that there is always a sense of purpose behind their friendships, creating bonds that are not easily shaken.

Parenthood

As natural leaders, Protagonists make excellent parents, striving to strike a balance between being encouraging and supportive friends to their children, while also working to instill strong values and a sense of personal responsibility. If there’s one strong trend with the Protagonist personality type, it’s that they are a bedrock of empathetic support, not bullheadedly telling people what they ought to do, but helping them to explore their options and encouraging them to follow their hearts.

Protagonist parents will encourage their children to explore and grow, recognizing and appreciating the individuality of the people they bring into this world and help to raise.

Whatever You Are, Be a Good One

Protagonist parents take pride in nurturing and inspiring strong values, and they take care to ensure that the basis for these values comes from understanding, not blind obedience. Whatever their children need in order to learn and grow, Protagonist parents give the time and energy necessary to provide it. While in their weaker moments they may succumb to more manipulative behavior, Protagonists mostly rely on their charm and idealism to make sure their children take these lessons to heart.

Owing to their aversion to conflict, Protagonist parents strive to ensure that their homes provide a safe and conflict-free environment. While they can deliver criticism, it’s not Protagonists’ strong suit, and laying down the occasionally necessary discipline won’t come naturally. But, people with the Protagonist personality type have high standards for their children, encouraging them to be the best they can be, and when these confrontations do happen, they try to frame the lessons as archetypes, moral constants in life which they hope their children will embrace.

As their children enter adolescence, they begin to truly make their own decisions, sometimes contrary to what their parents want – while Protagonists will do their best to meet this with grace and humor, they can feel hurt, and even unloved, in the face of this rebellion. Protagonists are sensitive, and if their child goes so far as to launch into criticisms, they may become truly upset, digging in their heels and locking horns.

Luckily, these occasions will likely be rare. Protagonists’ intuition gives them a talent for understanding, and regardless of the heat of the moment, their children will move on, remembering the genuine warmth, care, love and encouragement they’ve always received from their Protagonist parents. They grow up feeling the lessons that have been woven into the fabric of their character, and recognize that they are the better for their parents’ efforts.

Career Paths

When it comes to finding a career, people with the Protagonist personality type cast their eyes towards anything that lets them do what they love most – helping other people! Lucky for them, people like being helped, and are even willing to pay for it, which means that Protagonists are rarely wanting for inspiration and opportunity in their search for meaningful work.

Don’t Worry When You Are Not Recognized, but Strive to Be Worthy of Recognition

Protagonists take a genuine interest in other people, approaching them with warm sociability and a helpful earnestness that rarely goes unnoticed. Altruistic careers like social and religious work, teaching, counseling, and advising of all sorts are popular avenues, giving people with the Protagonist personality type a chance to help others learn, grow, and become more independent. This attitude, alongside their social skills, emotional intelligence and tendency to be “that person who knows everybody”, can be adapted to quite a range of other careers as well, making Protagonists natural HR administrators, event coordinators, and politicians – anything that helps a community or organization to operate more smoothly.

To top it all off, Protagonists are able to express themselves both creatively and honestly, allowing them to approach positions as sales representatives and advertising consultants from a certain idealistic perspective, intuitively picking up on the needs and wants of their customers, and working to make them happier. However, Protagonists need to make sure they get to focus on people, not systems and spreadsheets, and they are unlikely to have the stomach for making the sort of decisions required in corporate governance positions – they will feel haunted, knowing that their decision cost someone their job, or that their product cost someone their life.

Having a preference for Intuitive (N) trait over its Observant (S) counterpart also means that careers demanding exceptional situational awareness, such as law enforcement, military service, and emergency response, will cause Protagonists to burn out quickly. While great at organizing willing parties and winning over skeptics, in dangerous situations Protagonists just won’t be able to maintain the sort of focus on their immediate physical surroundings that they inevitably demand of themselves hour after hour, day after day.

Always Bear in Mind That Your Own Resolution to Succeed Is More Important Than Any Other

It makes a great deal more sense for Protagonists to be the force keeping these vital services organized and running well, taking their long-term views, people skills and idealism, and using them to shape the situation on the ground, while more physical personality types manage the moment-to-moment crises. People with the Protagonist personality type are always up for a good challenge – and nothing thrills them quite like helping others. But while willing to train the necessary skills, Protagonists will always show an underlying preference for the sort of help that draws a positive long-term trend, that effects change that really sticks.

At the heart of it, Protagonists need to see how the story ends, to feel and experience the gratitude and appreciation of the people they’ve helped in order to be happy.

Careers operating behind enemy lines and arriving at the scene of the crime too late to help will simply weigh on Protagonists’ sensitive hearts and minds, especially if criticized despite their efforts. On the other hand, Protagonists are a driven, versatile group, and that same vision that pulls them towards administration and politics can help them focus through the stress of the moment, knowing that each second of effort contributes to something bigger than themselves.

Workplace Habits

People with the Protagonist personality type are intelligent, warm, idealistic, charismatic, creative, social... With this wind at their backs, Protagonists are able to thrive in many diverse roles, at any level of seniority. Moreover, they are simply likeable people, and this quality propels them to success wherever they have a chance to work with others.

Protagonist Subordinates

As subordinates, Protagonists will often underestimate themselves – nevertheless, they quickly make an impression on their managers. Quick learners and excellent multitaskers, people with the Protagonist personality type are able to take on multiple responsibilities with competence and good cheer. Protagonists are hardworking, reliable and eager to help – but this can all be a double-edged sword, as some managers will take advantage of Protagonists’ excellent quality of character by making too many requests and overburdening their Protagonist subordinates with extra work. Protagonists are conflict-averse and try to avoid unnecessary criticism, and in all likelihood will accept these extra tasks in an attempt to maintain a positive impression and frictionless environment.

Protagonist Colleagues

As colleagues, Protagonists’ desire to assist and cooperate is even more evident as they draw their coworkers into teams where everyone can feel comfortable expressing their opinions and suggestions, working together to develop win-win situations that get the job done. Protagonists’ tolerance, open-mindedness and easy sociability make it easy for them to relate to their colleagues, but also make it perhaps a little too easy for their colleagues to shift their problems onto Protagonists’ plates. People with the Protagonist personality type are sensitive to the needs of others, and their role as a social nexus means that problems inevitably find their way to Protagonists’ doorsteps, where colleagues will find a willing, if overburdened, associate.

Protagonist Managers

While perfectly capable as subordinates and colleagues, Protagonists’ true calling, where their capacity for insightful and inspiring communication and sensitivity to the needs of others really shows, is in managing teams. As managers, Protagonists combine their skill in recognizing individual motivations with their natural charisma to not only push their teams and projects forward, but to make their teams want to push forward. They may sometimes stoop to manipulation, the alternative often being a more direct confrontation, but Protagonists’ end goal is always to get done what they set out to do in a way that leaves everyone involved satisfied with their roles and the results they achieved together.

Conclusion

Few personality types are as inspiring and charismatic as Protagonists. Their idealism and vision allow Protagonists to overcome many challenging obstacles, more often than not brightening the lives of those around them. Protagonists’ imagination is invaluable in many areas, including their own personal growth.

Yet Protagonists can be easily tripped up in areas where idealism and altruism are more of a liability than an asset. Whether it is finding (or keeping) a partner, staying calm under pressure, reaching dazzling heights on the career ladder or making difficult decisions, Protagonists need to put in a conscious effort to develop their weaker traits and additional skills.

[adultswim2021]

The September 11th Attacks September 11th, 2001 - 8:46:40 A.M | S01E01

The September 11 attacks, often referred to as 9/11,[a] were a series of four coordinated terrorist attacks by the Wahhabi[3] terrorist group Al-Qaeda[4][5][6] against the United States on the morning of Tuesday, September 11, 2001. The attacks resulted in 2,977 fatalities, over 25,000 injuries, and substantial long-term health consequences, in addition to at least $10 billion in infrastructure and property damage.[7][8] It is the deadliest terrorist attack in human history and the single  deadliest incident for firefighters and law enforcement officers in the history of the United States, with 340[9] and 72 killed,[10][11] respectively.

Four passenger airliners which had departed from airports in the northeastern United States bound for California were hijacked by 19 al-Qaeda terrorists. Two of the planes, American Airlines Flight 11 and United Airlines Flight 175, crashed into the North and South towers, respectively, of the World Trade Center complex in Lower Manhattan. Within an hour and 42 minutes, both 110-story towers collapsed. Debris and the resulting fires caused a partial or complete collapse of all other buildings in the World Trade Center complex, including the 47-story 7 World Trade Center tower, as well as significant damage to ten other large surrounding structures. A third plane, American Airlines Flight 77, was crashed into the Pentagon (the headquarters of the U.S. Department of Defense) in Arlington County, Virginia, which led to a partial collapse of the building's west side. The fourth plane, United Airlines Flight 93, was initially flown toward Washington, D.C., but crashed into a field in Stonycreek Township, Pennsylvania, after passengers thwarted the hijackers.

Suspicion quickly fell onto al-Qaeda. The United States responded by launching the War on Terror and invading Afghanistan to depose the Taliban, which had not complied with U.S. demands to expel al-Qaeda from Afghanistan and extradite their leader Osama bin Laden. Many countries strengthened their anti-terrorism legislation and expanded the powers of law enforcement and intelligence agencies to prevent terrorist attacks. Although bin Laden initially denied any involvement, in 2004 he claimed responsibility for the attacks.[2] Al-Qaeda and bin Laden cited U.S. support of Israel, the presence of U.S. troops in Saudi Arabia, and sanctions against Iraq as motives. After evading capture for almost a decade, bin Laden was located in Pakistan in 2011 and killed during a U.S. military raid.

The destruction of the World Trade Center and nearby infrastructure seriously harmed the economy of New York City and had a significant effect on global markets. The U.S. and Canadian civilian airspaces were closed until September 13, while Wall Street was closed until September 17. Many closings, evacuations, and cancellations followed, out of respect or fear of further attacks. Cleanup of the World Trade Center site was completed in May 2002, and the Pentagon was repaired within a year. The construction of One World Trade Center began in November 2006, and the building opened in November 2014.[12][13]Numerous memorials have been constructed, including the National September 11 Memorial & Museum in New York City, the Pentagon Memorial in Arlington County, Virginia, and the Flight 93 National Memorial at the Pennsylvania crash site.

Background

Al-Qaeda

The origins of al-Qaeda can be traced to 1979 when the Soviet Union invaded Afghanistan. Osama bin Laden travelled to Afghanistan and helped to organize Arab mujahideen to resist the Soviets.[14] Under the guidance of Ayman al-Zawahiri, bin Laden became more radical.[15] In 1996, bin Laden issued his first fatwā, calling for American soldiers to leave Saudi Arabia.[16]

In a second fatwā in 1998, bin Laden outlined his objections to American foreign policy with respect to Israel, as well as the continued presence of American troops in Saudi Arabia after the Gulf War.[17] Bin Laden used Islamic texts to exhort Muslims to attack Americans until the stated grievances were reversed. Muslim legal scholars "have throughout Islamic history unanimously agreed that the jihad is an individual duty if the enemy destroys the Muslim countries", according to bin Laden.[17]

Osama bin Laden

Bin Laden orchestrated the attacks and initially denied involvement but later recanted his false statements.[2][18][19]Al Jazeera broadcast a statement by bin Laden on September 16, 2001, stating, "I stress that I have not carried out this act, which appears to have been carried out by individuals with their own motivation."[20] In November 2001, U.S. forces recovered a videotape from a destroyed house in Jalalabad, Afghanistan. In the video, bin Laden is seen talking to Khaled al-Harbi and admits foreknowledge of the attacks.[21] On December 27, 2001, a second bin Laden video was released. In the video, he said:

It has become clear that the West in general and America in particular have an unspeakable hatred for Islam. ... It is the hatred of crusaders. Terrorism against America deserves to be praised because it was a response to injustice, aimed at forcing America to stop its support for Israel, which kills our people. ... We say that the end of the United States is imminent, whether Bin Laden or his followers are alive or dead, for the awakening of the Muslim umma (nation) has occurred but he stopped short of admitting responsibility for the attacks.[22]

Shortly before the U.S. presidential election in 2004, bin Laden used a taped statement to publicly acknowledge al-Qaeda's involvement in the attacks on the United States. He admitted his direct link to the attacks and said they were carried out because:

we are free ... and want to regain freedom for our nation. As you undermine our security, we undermine yours.[23]

Bin Laden said he had personally directed his followers to attack the World Trade Center and the Pentagon.[24][25] Another video obtained by Al Jazeera in September 2006 shows bin Laden with Ramzi bin al-Shibh, as well as two hijackers, Hamza al-Ghamdi and Wail al-Shehri, as they make preparations for the attacks.[26] The U.S. never formally indicted bin Laden for the 9/11 attacks, but he was on the FBI's Most Wanted List for the bombings of the U.S. Embassies in Dar es Salaam, Tanzania, and Nairobi, Kenya.[27][28] After a 10-year manhunt, U.S. President Barack Obama announced that bin Laden was killed by American special forces in his compound in Abbottabad, Pakistan, on May 1, 2011.[29]

Khalid Sheikh Mohammed

Journalist Yosri Fouda of the Arabic television channel Al Jazeera reported that in April 2002, Khalid Sheikh Mohammed admitted his involvement in the attacks, along with Ramzi bin al-Shibh.[30][31][32] The 2004 9/11 Commission Report determined that the animosity towards the United States felt by Mohammed, the principal architect of the 9/11 attacks, stemmed from his "violent disagreement with U.S. foreign policy favoring Israel".[33] Mohammed was also an adviser and financier of the 1993 World Trade Center bombing and the uncle of Ramzi Yousef, the lead bomber in that attack.[34][35]

Mohammed was arrested on March 1, 2003, in Rawalpindi, Pakistan, by Pakistani security officials working with the CIA. He was then held at multiple CIA secret prisons and Guantanamo Bay where he was interrogated and tortured with methods including waterboarding.[36][37] During U.S. hearings at Guantanamo Bay in March 2007, Mohammed again confessed his responsibility for the attacks, stating he "was responsible for the 9/11 operation from A to Z" and that his statement was not made under duress.[32][38]

A letter presented by the lawyers of Khaled Sheikh Mohammed in the U.S. District Court, Manhattan on July 26, 2019 indicated that he was interested in testifying about Saudi Arabia’s role in the 9/11 attacks and helping the victims and families of the victims of 9/11 in exchange for the United States not seeking the death penalty against him. James Kreindler, one of the lawyers for the victims, raised question over the usefulness of Mohammed.[1]

Other al-Qaeda members

In "Substitution for Testimony of Khalid Sheikh Mohammed" from the trial of Zacarias Moussaoui, five people are identified as having been completely aware of the operation's details. They are bin Laden, Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, Ramzi bin al-Shibh, Abu Turab al-Urduni, and Mohammed Atef.[39] To date, only peripheral figures have been tried or convicted for the attacks.

On September 26, 2005, the Spanish high court sentenced Abu Dahdah to 27 years in prison for conspiracy on the 9/11 attacks and being a member of the terrorist organization al-Qaeda. At the same time, another 17 al-Qaeda members were sentenced to penalties of between six and eleven years.[40] On February 16, 2006, the Spanish Supreme Court reduced the Abu Dahdah penalty to 12 years because it considered that his participation in the conspiracy was not proven.[41]

Also in 2006, Moussaoui—who some originally suspected might have been the assigned 20th hijacker—was convicted for the lesser role of conspiracy to commit acts of terrorism and air piracy. He was sentenced to life in prison without parole in the United States.[42][43]Mounir el-Motassadeq, an associate of the Hamburg-based hijackers, served 15 years in Germany for his role in helping the hijackers prepare for the attacks. He was released in October 2018, and deported to Morocco.[44]

The Hamburg cell in Germany included radical Islamists who eventually came to be key operatives in the 9/11 attacks.[45]Mohamed Atta, Marwan al-Shehhi, Ziad Jarrah, Ramzi bin al-Shibh, and Said Bahaji were all members of al-Qaeda's Hamburg cell.[46]

Motives

Osama bin Laden's declaration of a holy war against the United States, and a 1998 fatwā signed by bin Laden and others, calling for the killing of Americans,[17] are seen by investigators as evidence of his motivation.[47] In bin Laden's November 2002 "Letter to America", he explicitly stated that al-Qaeda's motives for their attacks include:

U.S. support of Israel[48][49]

support for the "attacks against Muslims" in Somalia

support of Philippines against Muslims in the Moro conflict

support for Israeli "aggression" against Muslims in Lebanon

support of Russian "atrocities against Muslims" in Chechnya

pro-American governments in the Middle East (who "act as your agents") being against Muslim interests

support of Indian "oppression against Muslims" in Kashmir

the presence of U.S. troops in Saudi Arabia[50]

the sanctions against Iraq[48]

After the attacks, bin Laden and al-Zawahiri released additional videotapes and audio recordings, some of which repeated those reasons for the attacks. Two particularly important publications were bin Laden's 2002 "Letter to America",[51] and a 2004 videotape by bin Laden.[52]

Bin Laden interpreted Muhammad as having banned the "permanent presence of infidels in Arabia".[53] In 1996, bin Laden issued a fatwā calling for American troops to leave Saudi Arabia. In 1998, al-Qaeda wrote, "for over seven years the United States has been occupying the lands of Islam in the holiest of places, the Arabian Peninsula, plundering its riches, dictating to its rulers, humiliating its people, terrorizing its neighbors, and turning its bases in the Peninsula into a spearhead through which to fight the neighboring Muslim peoples."[54]

In a December 1999 interview, bin Laden said he felt that Americans were "too near to Mecca", and considered this a provocation to the entire Muslim world.[55] One analysis of suicide terrorism suggested that without U.S. troops in Saudi Arabia, al-Qaeda likely would not have been able to get people to commit to suicide missions.[56]

In the 1998 fatwā, al-Qaeda identified the Iraq sanctions as a reason to kill Americans, condemning the "protracted blockade"[54] among other actions that constitute a declaration of war against "Allah, his messenger, and Muslims."[54] The fatwā declared that "the ruling to kill the Americans and their allies—civilians and military—is an individual duty for every Muslim who can do it in any country in which it is possible to do it, in order to liberate the al-Aqsa Mosque and the holy mosque of Mecca from their grip, and in order for their [the Americans'] armies to move out of all the lands of Islam, defeated and unable to threaten any Muslim."[17][57]

In 2004, Bin Laden claimed that the idea of destroying the towers had first occurred to him in 1982, when he witnessed Israel's bombardment of high-rise apartment buildings during the 1982 Lebanon War.[58][59] Some analysts, including Mearsheimer and Walt, also claimed that U.S. support of Israel was one motive for the attacks.[49][55] In 2004 and 2010, bin Laden again connected the September 11 attacks with U.S. support of Israel, although most of the letter expressed bin Laden's disdain for President Bush and bin Laden's hope to "destroy and bankrupt" the U.S.[60][61]

Other motives have been suggested in addition to those stated by bin Laden and al-Qaeda. Some authors suggested the "humiliation" that resulted from the Islamic world falling behind the Western world—this discrepancy was rendered especially visible by the globalization trend[62][63] and a desire to provoke the U.S. into a broader war against the Islamic world in the hope of motivating more allies to support al-Qaeda. Similarly, others have argued that 9/11 was a strategic move with the objective of provoking America into a war that would incite a pan-Islamic revolution.[64][65]

Planning

The attacks were conceived by Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, who first presented it to Osama bin Laden in 1996.[66] At that time, bin Laden and al-Qaeda were in a period of transition, having just relocated back to Afghanistan from Sudan.[67] The 1998 African Embassy bombings and bin Laden's February 1998 fatwā marked a turning point of al-Qaeda's terrorist operation,[68] as bin Laden became intent on attacking the United States.

In late 1998 or early 1999, bin Laden gave approval for Mohammed to go forward with organizing the plot.[69] Mohammed, bin Laden, and bin Laden's deputy Mohammed Atef held a series of meetings in early 1999.[70] Atef provided operational support, including target selections and helping arrange travel for the hijackers.[67] Bin Laden overruled Mohammed, rejecting potential targets such as the U.S. Bank Tower in Los Angeles for lack of time.[71][72]

Bin Laden provided leadership and financial support, and was involved in selecting participants.[73] He initially selected Nawaf al-Hazmi and Khalid al-Mihdhar, both experienced jihadists who had fought in Bosnia. Hazmi and Mihdhar arrived in the United States in mid-January 2000. In early 2000, Hazmi and Mihdhar took flying lessons in San Diego, California, but both spoke little English, performed poorly in flying lessons, and eventually served as secondary—or "muscle"—hijackers.[74][75]

In late 1999, a group of men from Hamburg, Germany arrived in Afghanistan; the group included Mohamed Atta, Marwan al-Shehhi, Ziad Jarrah, and Ramzi bin al-Shibh.[76] Bin Laden selected these men because they were educated, could speak English, and had experience living in the West.[77] New recruits were routinely screened for special skills and al-Qaeda leaders consequently discovered that Hani Hanjour already had a commercial pilot's license.[78] Mohammed later said that he helped the hijackers blend in by teaching them how to order food in restaurants and dress in Western clothing.[79]

Hanjour arrived in San Diego on December 8, 2000, joining Hazmi.[80]:6–7 They soon left for Arizona, where Hanjour took refresher training.[80]:7 Marwan al-Shehhi arrived at the end of May 2000, while Atta arrived on June 3, 2000, and Jarrah arrived on June 27, 2000.[80]:6 Bin al-Shibh applied several times for a visa to the United States, but as a Yemeni, he was rejected out of concerns he would overstay his visa.[80]:4, 14 Bin al-Shibh stayed in Hamburg, providing coordination between Atta and Mohammed.[80]:16 The three Hamburg cell members all took pilot training in South Florida at Huffman Aviation.[80]:6

In spring of 2001, the secondary hijackers began arriving in the United States.[81] In July 2001, Atta met with bin al-Shibh in Spain, where they coordinated details of the plot, including final target selection. Bin al-Shibh also passed along bin Laden's wish for the attacks to be carried out as soon as possible.[82] Some of the hijackers received passports from corrupt Saudi officials who were family members, or used fraudulent passports to gain entry.[83]

There is some idea that 9/11 was selected by the hijackers as the date of the attack because of its resemblance to 9-1-1, the phone number to report emergencies in the U.S. However, Lawrence Wright wrote that the hijackers chose it because September 11, 1683 is when the King of Poland began the battle that turned back the Muslim armies from the Ottoman Empire that were attempting to capture Vienna. For Osama bin Laden, this was a date when the West gained some dominance over Islam, and by attacking on this date, he hoped to make a step in Islam "winning" the war for worldwide power and influence.[84]

Prior intelligence

In late 1999, al-Qaeda associate Walid bin Attash ("Khallad") contacted Mihdhar, telling him to meet him in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia; Hazmi and Abu Bara al Yemeni would also be in attendance. The NSA intercepted a telephone call mentioning the meeting, Mihdhar, and the name "Nawaf" (Hazmi). While the agency feared "Something nefarious might be afoot", it took no further action. The CIA had already been alerted by Saudi intelligence about the status of Mihdhar and Hazmi as al-Qaeda members, and a CIA team broke into Mihdhar's Dubai hotel room and discovered that Mihdhar had a U.S. visa. While Alec Station alerted intelligence agencies worldwide about this fact, it did not share this information with the FBI. The Malaysian Special Branch observed the January 5, 2000 meeting of the two al-Qaeda members, and informed the CIA that Mihdhar, Hazmi, and Khallad were flying to Bangkok, but the CIA never notified other agencies of this, nor did it ask the State Department to put Mihdhar on its watchlist. An FBI liaison to Alec Station asked permission to inform the FBI of the meeting but was told: "This is not a matter for the FBI."[85]

By late June, senior counter-terrorism official Richard Clarke and CIA director George Tenet were "convinced that a major series of attacks was about to come", although the CIA believed the attacks would likely occur in Saudi Arabia or Israel.[86] In early July, Clarke put domestic agencies on "full alert", telling them, "Something really spectacular is going to happen here. soon." He asked the FBI and the State Department to alert the embassies and police departments, and the Defense Department to go to "Threat Condition Delta".[87][88] Clarke would later write: "Somewhere in CIA there was information that two known al Qaeda terrorists had come into the United States. Somewhere in FBI there was information that strange things had been going on at flight schools in the United States... They had specific information about individual terrorists from which one could have deduced what was about to happen. None of that information got to me or the White House."[89]

On July 13, Tom Wilshire, a CIA agent assigned to the FBI's international terrorism division, emailed his superiors at the CIA's Counterterrorism Center (CTC) requesting permission to inform the FBI that Hazmi was in the country and that Mihdhar had a U.S. visa. The CIA never responded.[90]

The same day in July, Margarette Gillespie, an FBI analyst working in the CTC, was told to review material about the Malaysia meeting. She was not told of the participants' presence in the U.S. The CIA gave Gillespie surveillance photos of Mihdhar and Hazmi from the meeting to show to FBI counterterrorism, but did not tell her their significance. The Intelink database informed her not to share intelligence material on the meeting to criminal investigators. When shown the photos, the FBI were refused more details on their significance, and they were not given Mihdhar's date of birth nor passport number.[91] In late August 2001, Gillespie told the INS, the State Department, the Customs Service, and the FBI to put Hazmi and Mihdhar on their watchlists, but the FBI was prohibited from using criminal agents in the search for the duo, which hindered their efforts.[92]

Also in July, a Phoenix-based FBI agent sent a message to FBI headquarters, Alec Station, and to FBI agents in New York alerting them to "the possibility of a coordinated effort by Osama bin Laden to send students to the United States to attend civil aviation universities and colleges". The agent, Kenneth Williams, suggested the need to interview all flight school managers and identify all Arab students seeking flight training.[93] In July, Jordan alerted the U.S. that al-Qaeda was planning an attack on the U.S.; "months later", Jordan notified the U.S. that the attack's codename was "The Big Wedding" and that it involved airplanes.[94]

On August 6, 2001, the CIA's Presidential Daily Brief ("PDB"), designated "For the President Only", was entitled "Bin Ladin Determined to Strike in U.S." The memo noted that FBI information "indicates patterns of suspicious activity in this country consistent with preparations for hijackings or other types of attacks".[95]

In mid-August, one Minnesota flight school alerted the FBI about Zacarias Moussaoui, who had asked "suspicious questions". The FBI found that Moussaoui was a radical who had traveled to Pakistan, and the INS arrested him for overstaying his French visa. Their request to search his laptop was denied by FBI headquarters due to the lack of probable cause.[96]

The failures in intelligence-sharing were attributed to 1995 Justice Department policies limiting intelligence sharing, combined with CIA and NSA reluctance to reveal "sensitive sources and methods" such as tapped phones.[97] Testifying before the 9/11 Commission in April 2004, then-Attorney General John Ashcroft recalled that the "single greatest structural cause for the September 11th problem was the wall that segregated or separated criminal investigators and intelligence agents".[98] Clarke also wrote: "There were failures in the organizations failures to get information to the right place at the right time."[99]

TLDR; it was an inside job

[reylofanfictionanthology]

Authors have now been revealed for For one is love and both are one in love!

Over 170 fics were posted to our Exchange this month and we are so excited to finally share the authors with you!  Thank you so much to all of the writers who wrote for this event!  

For one is love and both are one in love collection on AO3 |  Gift Fic Master Post Part Two | Treats Master Post

Gift Fic Master Post Part One: 

ghosts on the shore by dearly for aaronBursar

“I meant what I said to you that day on the Death Star. I thought I could never go back. I still think it even now—that I don’t belong here, that I never will.” “But you did come back,” she said, squeezing his hand. “You’re here now. With me. You chose it. Despite everything, we made it, both of us.” They sat in silence for awhile, hands clasped while they watched the camp clear as people finally turned in for the night. Then, suddenly, Ben was struck with an idea. “What if we took a trip?”

Sugar High by HopeRebelfor abbytheatre08

When Maz Kanata hosts five weeks of a Battle of the Bands competition, Rey Johnson and Kylo Ren find themselves both pitted against one another, and drawn together as the weeks go on.

Delayed For A While by tmf for aionimica

Death cannot stop love. All it can do is delay it awhile.

I am ready to follow you even though I don't know where by iamladyloki for AlwaysEverlark

Her closest friends want Rey to move on from what happened on Exegol, but she refuses to accept that Ben Solo, her soulmate in the Force, is dead. Instead, she undertakes a rescue mission to bring Ben home--no matter the risk.

A More Perfect Union by fangirl_outlet for america_oreosandkitkats

Rey, new to DC, tags along to a stuffy networking event with her friend -- they're both poor and, hell, there's free booze. Ben, a recruiter for the lobbyist firm he works for, finds the intern with the soft voice and angry eyes a fun challenge -- especially when he finds out she works for his estranged mother Senator Leia Organa.

In the Den of the Darkwolf by Fairleigh for Amy326

Rey awakened in the darkwolf’s den.

happy cockus day by trasharama for andabatae

She prefers the nip of New Hampshire winters, heavy winds blowing in her hair, being bundled up in three layers with pens whose ink freeze fast and thaw slow. She loves warm buildings, and Christmas breaks, and slurping down huge bowls of ramen in the evenings, but being on the ground, a clipboard in her hand, boots on a voter’s doorstep? That’s where she knows she belongs. So there are a lot of things going against Rey Johnson’s introduction to Ben Solo, his moody personality probably the least of her worries, since he’s the reason she’s not outside, making some sort of tangible effort to get his mother elected as president.

Hope Lives by gennalannisters for aNerdObsessed

This AU story takes place right after the Battle of Exegol, Rey and Ben have just defeated Palpatine and they are both seriously injured but not mortally wounded. When all hope is lost for them as there is no one coming to get them, old friends of the past come to their aid.

Two Bits (or The Haircut) by Bombastique for Ann3onymous

Three days into their marriage of convenience, Ben and Rey are maybe starting to realize that there’s more to this arrangement than a green card or a cooperative board of directors.

We've Got a Good Thing Here by greyrey-lo (punkpoemprose) for Anysia

Rey & Ben Solo navigate their feelings in the aftermath of the end of the war. With Ben a "functionally dead" force ghost, Rey has to come to terms with how she will balance restoring liberty to the galaxy and making her relationship with Ben work in a... physical sense. It's a difficult enough task to begin with, and it doesn't help that every time they're alone someone seems to require Rey for something.

Event Horizon by SpaceWaffleHouseTM for Apisa_B

Rey runs into Kylo Ren on a mission for the Resistance, and they have to work together against their wishes. This would be simple... if working together didn't involve pretending to be married, sharing a hotel room, and a lot of unresolved feelings.

still caught in yesterday's wake by ilum for Apricot

Her heart is heavy with fear—fear that one day she will no longer be able to recall the shape of Ben’s face, or the timbre of his voice, or the exact color of his eyes; that her memory of him will fade until she is left with nothing but the pain of his absence, like some phantom limb that aches and aches and aches, relentlessly.

A Dark Day Dream by Lizardbeeth for ArdeaJestin

Ben's come home, but Rey can't face him. Not because of anything he's done, at least not in real life. But in her fantasies? oh yes.

Become Who You Were Meant to Be by lucymonster for Aurae

Kylo is a fighter both by training and by preference. Tactics, not strategy. Action, not discussion. Every instinct in him wants to solve his problems by grabbing his sword and shedding some blood. But those easy days are behind him now. He has a galaxy to run. It would be easier if only he could stop thinking about her.

The Spaces Inbetween by aionimica for Ayrith (freijya)

It wasn’t the first time. Not the first since Crait and she saw him kneeling and their eyes met with anger and ache and want and everything else they didn’t have to say. No. Not the first, nor the second, nor even the third. This was a well trodden path that they all walked over and over. As if the Force was taking their hands and despite both of them tearing it away, still trying to bring them together. --- Rey and Kylo have been dealing with the Force bond for some time, but it finally reaches a tipping point.

The Least Of What I Could Do by OkayPianist for benperor-ren (winterelf86)

"I refuse to play opposite someone who has never had a part in their entire life," sneers Ben. "Either Rey goes or I do."

Niima's by fantastic_fanatics for bensolosredemption

Though Niima's is a questionable establishment, it's always been Ben's favorite bar. It's not just because he's inexplicably attracted to the new bartender, either - though he has to admit she might have something to do with it.

Devil Spawn by OptimisticBeth for Biekewieke

After a hot anonymous encounter at The Annual Organa Halloween Ball, Rey realizes she slept with the horrible guy who is her new boss. But he doesn't recognize her! And he asks her to track down his mystery hookup, which she totally agrees to do (wink wink, haha, she's lying). But then she finds out she's pregnant! GASP! What's a scared, pregnant single girl to do? (Other than take a nap because she's exhausted.)

Belonging by Megara09 for bitterbones

Friends-with-benefits except whoops I'm in love with you now and hate seeing you flirt with other people because we're technically not together.

Paradise by englishable for bittersnake

For two people whose souls are inseparably united, the question of sex shouldn't be that complicated. Given Ben and Rey's individual histories, however, it really comes as no surprise. But that's all right. They’ll have their whole lives together to figure it out, if Rey and Ben and possibly several hundred generations’ worth of Jedi ghosts have anything to say about the matter. Which they do.

Miss Johnson & the Professor by ElegyGoldsmith for blackheretic (redlondons)

Her heart wants to erupt through her throat, and she audibly gulps, trying to keep her gaze from the only place it wants to go. Thank fuck his eyes are so hypnotic; she can get lost in them as she stammers for English syllables. “Y-Yes, Dr. Solo?” “Seriously, Rey.” Is he blushing? Surely not. “I’ve known you all year, call me Ben.” “Ben,” she mumbles. It tastes like delicious sacrilege. “I actually think you’re in my bed.” “Huh?” “The couch. I was going to sleep there. Remember?” Rey clutches the blanket to her collarbone, hoping the light fabric is tented loosely enough to cover her breasts. Fuck, why does he have to be so distractingly hot? “No, it’s all right. I don’t mind, Professor.” “Ben," he insists firmly. “And I won’t be able to sleep at all knowing I’m comfy in a bed while you’re sleeping on that thing.”

Owner Malfunction. by VirtualMadness for Bombastique

One year after surviving Execgol, Rey and Ben Solo find themselves in each other's company after they are both captured while trying to take back the Falcon from Kanjiklub remnants. (AKA - The Force, the Falcon, love, and droids.)

Stealing the Light by NiriKeehan for bratanimus

Redemption isn’t given. It’s earned. Or: As the galaxy rebuilds from war, the man formerly known as Kylo Ren tries to make peace with the person he was, and the person he’s becoming.

Rey Niima and the American (Hot Piece of) Ass that She Just Wants to Tap, while also Not Dying in the Triwizard Tournament or Becoming Otherwise Inconvenienced or Maimed by MahoganyDoodles for Cairdiuil_Paiste

Completed for the prompt: Hogwarts AU! Triwizard tournament time with seventh year Rey representing Hogwarts. She wants to impress the MACUSA representative to strengthen her chances of joining their graduate programme. Too bad American diplomat Ben Solo doesn't seem to like her…

a forest of stars by QueenOfCarrotFlowers for caisha

Rey works hard at the diner to save up for her long dreamed-of vacation to Finland. She's lonely, but that's not new. What is new is Kylo Ren, the CEO of Orpheus Corp and new boss of her best friend Finn. When Finn and Kylo Ren stop by the diner for lunch, Rey feels as though she's finally met someone who understands her. But who is Kylo Ren, and what's his secret? A Modern Fae AU

I am a Soul Longing by La_Catrina for Ceallaigh

Rey has spent the last two years searching the galaxy for clues about how to bring Ben back. Now, finally, it seems she has a solid lead. The planet Xolutel is said to be a vergence in the Force, and myth has it there's a hidden temple where worshipers of the Force were granted their deepest desires. No matter how slim the possibility, Rey owes it to Ben and herself to check it out. She's not known to give up easily.

The World Has Been Sad Since Tuesday by crystanagahori for ceciliasheplin

The creature on his bed defied explanation, but Kylo Ren had a distinct feeling that there was nothing to worry about, nothing to fear. At least, not in this room. Demons lay in wait outside, but not here. Best not to let anyone know about this.

Be With Me by tweis24 for Chthonia

A force connection between Kylo (Ben), and Rey. It takes place while she is on Ach-To, and he is on the Death Star.

between the shadow and the soul by ninecrimes for ClockworkCrow (icemink)

“You and Skywalker have been keeping it a secret,” she said, her eyes searching his face to catch him when he lies. “But I know the truth. I learned it, the day after we fought on Mustafar. That Lord Vader was his father, and your grandfather.” He struggled against her stasis but she pushed back harder, her power swirling around them both. “Rey—” “Don’t you see, Ben?” There was a ghost of a smile on her lips. “The darkness is inside of you, too. You don’t have to keep fighting it. You were meant to be mine.” Mine. . or: Jedi Knight Ben Solo should really stop doing smuggling runs with his father. Kira Ren should really stop trying to turn him to the dark side.

The Rescue by Vivien for cohava

“What is it?” Ben asked, watching the worry lines form on Rey’s forehead as she checked the message that had just pinged through her datapad. “Poe’s leading the relief efforts on Faratula. There’s a boy there, Force sensitive. Orphaned. Poe says it’s a pretty bad situation.” “Let’s go get him, then,” he said without pausing.

how easy you are to need by OccasionallyCreative for Crimson_Alchemistress

The war is finished, yet Rey still carries wounds. They come in the form of nightmares, but Ben is there to comfort her.

stuck on how it feels here next to you by kuresoto for crossingwinter

Around four months ago, Ben and Rey married out of convenience. It had started that way and one of the key reasons why they had agreed to this in the first place was the condition that neither had romantic feelings for the other. This is their life, both head of heels for the other while not really knowing what to do about it.

Blue Sand by patig_00 for Crysania

The pale crimson sun rises above the horizon across the fields. A slight wind gently brushed Rey’s face. She left the ship and coverded herself with a blue scarf from a desert heat. She stepped forward, carefully observing the small city before her. Hot sand was burning her feets despite thick soles of boots. “This is going to be disaster,” she told herself with a crooked smile.

covert mission: baby acquisition bitterbones for crystanagahori

In which Rey decides she's ready to start a family of her own and Ben Solo, her boss and dear friend, would make the perfect sperm donor. * It was a stupid, girlish crush. One that likely wasn’t reciprocated, and could land her in a world of trouble with HR if she acted brashly. But still, she wanted him. He could waive his parental rights for all she cared. They could enter into some sort of contract, if such things existed. But he was the perfect candidate, the ideal sperm donor. Ben Solo.

hands that hurt, hands that heal solikerez for cuddlesome

Rey climbs on top of Ben and makes out with his sopping self after Force healing his stab wound.

It was not Death, for I stood Up by politicalmamaduck for CwenPhy

Emperor Palpatine lied on Exegol; Rey is not his granddaughter. Rey sets off on a journey, led by Obi-Wan Kenobi, to bring Ben Solo back from the World Between Worlds.

Good Boy by Aicosu for dankobah

Rey takes her dog to a nearby veterinary clinic for an emergency and doesn't expect to meet Ben (or anyone) while there.

The Unbreakable Bond by AlwaysEverlark for DarkSideOfMe

After Crait, Rey thought she had severed their Force Bond, or at least closed it, but some weeks ago she started feeling it, a presence in the back of her mind. Then she could hear him saying her name or other random words or feelings: concern, anxiety, loneliness, longing..to be fair, she didn’t know who those feelings belonged to, if there were Kylo’s or hers. And that was the other reason to put an end to this; she wasn’t ready to deal with anything different to her anger and disappointment. She had to focus on her training, on the Resistance, in their fight against “his” First Order. She was scared, scared of something she couldn’t put a name to, and last night had just showed her how important it was to break their connection. It was time to read the Jedi texts she’s been putting off for too long.

NiimaRide by witchsoup for datswatutink

Journey urge her not to stop believin' but provide no further clarification before she's strapped in the back seat and they're pulling away from the only real break she's had in twenty-four years.

To Hold and Give Light by midwinterspring for dearly

After Exegol, Rey takes an injured Ben back to the Resistance.

a conundrum of lightsabers by wombathos for devon380black (kryptonian17)

In the aftermath of Crait, Rey is left with two halves of a broken lightsaber she has no idea how to fix. As her force bond conversations with Ben continue, she comes to understand he's the only one who can help her with her problem. Maybe if they can repair one thing, they can repair something else too.

What Happens in Hotel Chandrila by starfleetjedi for DrPearlGatsby

Accompanying her best friends to a Galaxy Wars convention in Chandrila sounded like a good idea at first. But third-wheeling sucks, and that's how Rey finds herself daydrinking alone at the hotel bar. And then she gets a free drink from a tall, brooding, handsome stranger…

Until the Wild Feelings Leave You by isszeldasayre for dustoftheancients

Rehabilitating from a battle injury leaves Rey an irritable mess. The way Ben hovers over her does nothing to help.

Kintsugi by Fic_me_senseless  for ElegyGoldsmith

In the darkest moments, the galaxy is still filled with light.

give me shapes and letters, if it’s not forever by dankobah for ElleRen31

She holds out her hand, “I don’t think we’ve met, I’m Rey.  I work at the flower shop next door.” He must be new, or she’s just a shut-in during work because she would’ve remembered seeing him after a year of being here. “I’m Kylo, I own the tattoo shop.”  He points to his building and her eyebrows raise as he shakes her hand.  Owner? So he’s the head honcho? She hums to herself and then keeps the smile plastered on her face. Then she sets her sights on the dogs, “What are their names?”

Where the ocean goes by Nebulous Bounds for Elywyngirlie

Sometimes getting out alive is the victory. Sometimes the rest takes a little time.

it shall not be death by TolkienGirl for englishable

Rey of the Jedi Knights is sent with her sword and Holy Fire, to destroy a palace of thorns.

It doesn't quite go as planned.

The Reckoning by bratanimus for Erin410

Because of Rey, Ben has grown rather good at waiting. But she’s waiting, too, for something that hasn’t dawned on him yet. [Post-TROS mildly angsty marriage proposal fluff, hope you enjoy!]

Trading Places by HellyJellyBean for Fairleigh

Kylo… Kylo awoke to the sound of her whimpering his name. He sat bolt upright in Rey’s extremely uncomfortable cot. Anxious for her safety, he reached out for her with his mind. Rey? He heard her moan and heat instantly pooled between his legs. Curious. The sensation was different but not unwelcome. Then he saw Rey, or rather he saw himself, naked and writhing on his bed. His mouth fell open. Rey was... masturbating. He watched in awe as she pumped his shaft up and down, slowly but forcefully. Kylo… She called his name again.

You'll Turn by shipperofdarkness for FangirlintheForest

A retelling of the Last Jedi's elevator and throne room scenes with a role reversal twist. Can Smuggler Ben turn Dark Rey?

Building Something Together by walkingsaladshooter for fantastic_fanatics

When Ben confronts his new upstairs neighbor who keeps making all manner of odd noises at all manner of hours, he didn't expect what she's doing up there. He also didn't expect her to be so pretty.

Little Starfighter by eliaatan for Fic_me_senseless

Convinced he ruins everything he touches, isolated and lonely Ben Solo successfully pushes everyone away, except for the girl who sees something in him she recognizes.

Benvenuto nella nostra famiglia by Ann3onymous for gennalannisters

"Well, I have sensitive information here. Dinner is just actually a ploy. It’s actually an interrogation to make sure you didn't read the documents." She turned and smirked at him as they headed down the stairs, "If that's the case, I'm happy to be interrogated through wining and dining.” Love is in the air at Harvard Square.

Binary Suns by Twisted_Mirror for gigi_marlee

Young Ben Solo meets a young Rey. The two form an intense and instant attachment to the confusion of Ben's parents and his Uncle, Jedi Master Luke Skywalker. What is a dyad and what will it mean for two children who have found belonging in each other?

more everything by caisha for HalfwayThrough

"I'm the boss, I've earned the right to show up whenever the fuck I want." He was arrogant, condescending, and an asshole. And he didn't have a mark on his wrist.

One Stick of Unsalted Butter by HalfwayThrough for HopeRebel

Rey's neighbor is the rudest, least considerate person she had to interact with. However, when she runs out of butter in the middle of night trying to bake cookies for Rose's birthday, there is only person she knows is awake and he is her only hope. Of course, things don't go according to plan.

come home, ben by shiiera for hxllosweetie33

He looked at their hands, watched as Rey intertwined their fingers together, and fought the back the shutter from the contact. “ Rey…” He whispered. She brought her hand to his face – calloused tips brushing against his scar – observing his face, every detail of it, the bags and dark circles under his eyes, the paleness of his skin, his dry lips, the lack of light behind his eyes.

Ashes of Life by Elwyngirlie for iamladyloki

Dark Rey becomes a reality and Ben has to remind her who she is

Negotiated Settlement Aurae for ilum

General Leia Organa has brought a small team with her to Kaytuu 5, expecting to negotiate a ceasefire between the First Order-controlled planetary government and local Resistance fighters. Unfortunately, Supreme Leader Armitage Hux has other plans. Rey will need the assistance of a Certain Someone who no longer calls himself Kylo Ren if she and her friends are to save the day.

Coming Home by Xochiquetzl for incognitajones

After the Battle of Exegol, Rey and an injured Ben are trapped together on an uninhabited planet.

The Stray by TheOriginalSuki for itsinthestars

Rey moves in across the hall from Ben; a former foster kid alone in the city, aspiring to be an actress. Ben is a ladder-climbing white collar businessman with a horrible boss and zero social life. Which is just the way he likes it. So why in the world has this insufferable creature made it her life's work to adopt him? From sharing her dinner to doing his laundry, she seems determined to make a connection. In the end, it's easier for Ben to just let her. But opening up means letting your heart be vulnerable.

Peace and Purpose by Anysia for itsnotillegal

Across the stars, Rey and Ben yearn for each other, neither able to move on, both facing the unending nights alone. But the Force longs for balance as surely as they long for each other.

Christmas Blues by benperor-ren for karlamartinova

The first snow had fallen, covering the ground like a white blanket. The emergence of winter weather always marked the increase of Christmas moods. The season when people fervently decorated their houses and you couldn’t walk through the mall or downtown area without hearing a Christmas jingle. The neighborhood already sparkled with multicolored lights and inflated or authentic snow-made snowmen. Rey Johnson’s festive mood rose with each house she drove by, her fingers tapping on the wheel as “Rocking Around the Christmas Tree”faded and transitioned into another song.

and I'll come home to you by thewayofthetrashcompactor for kuresoto

Ben and Rey both escape Exegol, and the past follows them. To protect the strange child they've found, they set up a school for Force-sensitives, but Ben can't shake the weight of his guilt.

what stranger miracles by incognitajones for La_Catrina

Ben can’t even manage to die right, apparently. 

the universe resting in my arms by AceQueenKing for Lightningpelt

Rey sees Ben, quietly tooling around the Skywalker homestead, his hands wet with mechanic's grease, and the image is so perfect that she holds her breath, not wanting to mar it with a loud breath.

counting my steps, reaching out to you by RedPaladin465 for Lizardbeth

All her life, Rey has felt snatches of someone else's emotions, seen visions of other places, other people she's certain she's never seen before. In a world where everything had been taken away from her, this connection was hers alone. She is wholly unprepared for the day she finds out that the person at the other end of the connection is a Jedi fighting as part of the Resistance against her delusional Master.

Soulmates by itsinthestars for LostInQueue

After Ben Solo disappears in front of her eyes, she finds a way to bring him back, where love began…

Heal by ceciliasheplin for LRRH17

A few weeks after the Battle of Crait, the Force connects Rey and Ben again on several occasions.

Softly, Softly by Merixcil for lucymonster

When the Resistance start to pick up distress calls from defecting Stormtroopers, they move to save as many as they can. It doesn't occur to them that the First Order might be after the same renegades until they're right on top of them.

First Impressions and Unexpected Connections by Melusine11 for LueurdeLaube

War has ravaged the galaxy, but finally, there is a chance at peace. Her grandfather arranges for Princess Rey Palpatine to wed the Supreme Leader Kylo Ren, broadcast across the galaxy to usher in the new era. They've never met before, but he's sent her letters.

All These Things That I've Done by MissCoppelia for MahoganyDoodles

Someone dropped down to Rey's level and reached for the empty plastic shell of her case. She stilled for a moment, afraid that she was about to get smacked with it, afraid to look up. “Sorry about him,” she heard over the sound of her heart beating through her ears. Not Hux? This voice was deeper. Rey looked up and saw Ben Solo in front of her, holding out the case for her, a sympathetic look in his dark brown eyes.

For Now by Celia_and for maq_moon

There are plenty of things he could say, but he doesn’t. Buying you muffins makes me excited to get out of bed in the morning. I wish I could go back in time and be the kind of person you could like. I don’t remember my life before you. ---------- When Kylo finds his soulmate, she doesn't know, and he doesn't tell her.

You can view the other two masterposts for this exchange in this tag.