#seriously go listen to that thing it surpassed all my expectations

[whumpninja]

Okay everyone, this afternoon I wanted to indulge the spooky in my brain, so I listened to a BBC radio adaptation of Dracula.

I was absolutely, 100% not prepared for the levels of whump this thing had. It freaking kicked my knees out from under me and punched me in the throat with the whump. I was praying nobody noticed my eyes getting as big as frisbees while I was listening at work because Jonathan Harker (who, by the way, was voiced by Tom Flipping Hiddleston) sounded almost in tears begging Count Dracula to let him go. Should also note that the scene with the Brides included one of them cooing “good boy” to Jonathan. Twice.

Dracula, for his part (played by a wildly terrifying David Suchet!) had a line near the end that went, and I quote, “Such a docile pet he makes when chained and gagged.” (Thankfully referring to Renfield, not Jonathan, because I would have had a stroke on the spot if it was Jonathan.)

I was in ecstasy, folks. Sheer whumper heaven. And it did not help my sudden inexplicable craving for vampire whump one bit so I’m probably just gonna do vampire whump in May now.

[pinejayy]

╰┈➤ Scarlet Witch S/O || Demon Slayer Headcanons

Including: hantengu clones and zohakuten // for zohakuten is only platonically 

requested by @phoenix-supremecy

summary: clones reacting to their s/o having powers like scarlet witch, and to the clones reacting to reader ripping off sekido’s jaw/lips off for yelling at them.

warnings: blood, reader ripping sekido’s jaw off, some nsfw implied (on karaku’s part) cuss words,

Sekido

Now the red eyed demon is quite impressed with your powers! He’s so amazed on how a human can hold these great powers, and he admires how strong you are. But you’ll never be as strong as him and he let’s you know by his harsh words.

His harsh words are the reason of your guy’s argument. You don’t understand why he’s always talking down on you and that he’s always reminding you that he’s better than you. 

One day you were in a bad mood, and you were just relaxing with the other clones and that’s when he came in and started to yell at you and only you. “Why in the Hell are you just sitting around! Get the fuck up, we need to train! If you want to improve on your skills you need to train!” 

And you just sat there, narrowing your eyes at him. The other clones looked at you expecting you to listen to him, but everyone was shocked when they heard flesh ripping away from the body and bones popping out of place. And that’s when you were holding Sekido’s jaw in your hand. Blood was pouring all over his clothing, and all you could hear was him choking on his blood. 

Aw, you want this back?” You asked him, to which he just nodded and you smirked. “Well if I give this back to you, you have to get off my back.” And he just shook your head which made you shake your head and turn around, and as you were about to turn around you heard him choke on his blood even more.

Looking at him. “Aw, I take that as a yes then.” You say and throw him his jaw at his face and walk away with a huge smile on his face. The other clones are probably laughing at him.

Karaku

Now the green eyed demon is probably turned on by your powers! He loves how powerful you are and honestly with this power you have he thinks your sexy/handsome, and he loves it whenever you use your powers in the bedroom, it makes things more excited.

So you and your green eyed demon love fool around a lot in the bedroom which pisses off sekido alot! Maybe it’s because of the loud moans or noises you guys make, or maybe the fact he doesn’t have someone who can please him. So Sekido is always yelling you and at Karaku.

Today you and Karaku were in a separate room, you on his lap. Both of you sharing a deep and passionate kiss and that’s when Sekido came in yelling at both of you. “Are you guy’s seriously at it again! Y/N shouldn’t you be training so you can improve on your powers! And yet here you are being a whore with your boyfriend.

And that’s when you slowly started to turn your head towards him, your head snapping to the side. You stare at Sekido’s eyes. His red eyes piercing into yours. And that’s when the room was filling with the scent of blood, and fleshing ripping away from the body. 

And right there you were holding onto a chunk of Sekido’s mouth on the palm of your hand. You just smile at him. “You want this back huh?”  And you could hear was him choking on his own blood. Karaku couldn’t help but laugh out loud. 

And you stood up. “Okay then, go get it boy!” You say, and throw his ripped mouth/lips out of the room. “Go fetch!” And with that he ran out of the room. And look at Karaku. “God that was so hot babe.” He told you.

Aizetsu

Now the gentle Demon is so kind towards you, he’s so amazed by your powers. And he’s so happy that you belong with him, and he’s always willing to help you improve on your powers because he believes that some day you can surpass him and the other clones. 

Aizetsu is quite clingy with you, he loves you with all his heart. He wants to protect you but he knows that you can handle yourself with your powers. But that doesn’t mean he’ll stop protecting you. With that being said, Sekido hates the fact that you have powers and he hates that maybe one day you’ll be more powerful than him,

So you and Sekido are always fighting and yelling at each other, which makes the blue eyed demon very sad, and it breaks his heart seeing two people he’s close with fight all the time. “Please don’t fight guys, it’s making me very sad.” 

And Sekido couldn’t help but snap at him, slapping him across the face and hissing at his comment. “Shut the hell up, I don’t care if it makes you sad. You’re an Upper Moon! Grow a pair of ba-” 

You didn’t give him an opportunity to finish his sentence, since he was choking on his own blood. You ripping off his throat with your powers. And he tried getting back his bloody throat which you backed away. “If you ever touch him again, I’ll rip something else off next time. Now get out of my sight.” You say throwing his throat at his face.

You smile and turn back to your boyfriend, he was so shocked as no one ever stood up for him like that. He looked at you with so much love! “Wow you did that for me my love?” 

Urogi

Now this chicken nugget is so happy that he found someone who isn’t just a normal weak human! He found you with these beautiful powers! And he’s so impressed with your skills, and with your powers he doesn’t have to treat you like glass, he can roughhouse with you.

Both of you guys love messing around and love playing around the woods, you guys could be playing tag and with your powers and his wings its a very fun game of tag. But with you guys playing around it makes Sekido very upset. 

Sekido thinks you shouldn’t be wasting your powers on stupid childish games, he believes that you should be working on your powers and be thinking about improving on yourself!

“Come on Y/N! Stop with these stupid games! You need to improve on your powers if you want to be useful to us!” He said snapping at you! “Stop playing with Chicken Fingers!” 

You watched him as he talked down on you and Urogi and you smiled at him, and your left eye twitched soft. And the area was filled with bones snapping and cracking. Sekido stood there with a dislocated jaw, he couldn’t speak. Urogi looked at you, his eyes wide open. He was shocked and he laughed nervously. 

Before Sekido could jump you Urogi grabbed you and carried you and flew off and away from the demon. He couldn’t help but laugh nervously “Remind me not to piss you off my dear!”

Zohakuten (PLATONICALLY )

Now he looked at you as parent figure and he does care for you. And with your powers he’s wants to protect you no matter what. You’re the only good thing in his life. The other Clones piss him off to the extreme and he hates it. So yeah!! Please protect him and he’ll protect you. 

Now he likes the idea of you improving your powers because he wouldn't have to worry about you getting hurt, he knows your strong and can take care of yourself but still, he worries about you.

As he dislikes the other clones he mostly gets in fights with Sekido. How great right? Two angry red eye demons fighting. So you were enjoying some time with Zohakuten and the other clones. And you don’t know what happened but both Sekido and Zohakuten were yelling at each other. And you didn’t like the idea of Sekdio yelling at him, it made you feel uneasy. 

And you could tell Zohakuten was getting angrier by the second and you knew you had to step in, since the other clones weren’t doing anything but just watching. So you did the best option, you ripped off Sekido’s tongue off with your powers, he was choking on his blood. The bloody tongue was on the floor and you spoke up. “Don’t you yell at him, you’re lucky that was only your tonuge.” 

The clones were shocked, but Zohakuten looked at Sekido’s struggling as he choked on his own blood. Zohakuten couldn’t help but laugh out loud. A deep laugh filled the room. It made your blood run cold. And the other clones went pale, as his laugh was uneasy. 

Zohakuten grabbed your wrist “Come on Y/N, let’s go. Let this fool choke on his blood.” 

[liaa--qb]

'The Viper and nightingale game '

[ Dark mean Aemond x strong niece] Part 4

chapter 4 : first heart break

Summary : Rheawina recalls her sweet and sour childhood moments. (We will go through their childhood memories )

( likes, comments and sharing would be appreciated🧡)

[ chapter 3 link]

**********************************************

It was amusing how she should have been with Jace and Luke, her brothers, but here she was, the first to reach him. Aemond abandoned his punching for a moment but then picked up a decayed, hefty sword, using it forcefully against a large rock, his voice dripping with disdain. "Those lowborn fools had the audacity to claim that a boy without a dragon is like a eunuch—no manhood to speak of. These wretched bastards dared say this to me, the prince."

His sword strikes grew louder and more aggressive, unsettling Rhaewina, as if his cursing weren't alarming enough. Aemond rarely used such strong language in front of his elders or other people, but in private, he often vented his frustrations. Still, he had never been this crude in her presence or Helaena's.

She stepped closer, attempting to touch his arm with her gentle hand. "I told you not to take them seriously. Their words can't define you. You surpass them in every conceivable way. My mother has always told me that having dragons doesn't make anyone courageous. She loves me for who I am, regardless. You don't need to let their words consume you entirely."

Her soothing words did little to calm his fury, as his response made evident. "Huh! Easy for a lady whose sons both have dragons and get everything they desire without hesitation, unlike me"

His words stung, and she hadn't expected such a response, particularly about her mother, who was also his sister. How could he say such things? Yes, he was angry, but he had no right to speak ill of her mother. She fired back with determination, "What do you mean by that? I don't have a dragon either. I've never shed a tear in front of her because of a dragon. You excel in everything, yet you harbor jealousy toward Jace, Aegon, and the others. Why ? You're never content with yourself, and that's your issue. Don't speak ill of my brothers and mother"

Aemond replied with a mirthless laugh, recognizing something. "Of course, how could you understand...could you? You certainly can't."

She yearned to comprehend the meaning behind his words. What could there possibly be that she wouldn't grasp?

Though Rhaewina was just a child, her youthful heart imbued her with the belief that she could conquer anything, achieve anything. She had never regarded herself as inferior. Her age might pose some limitations in understanding certain matters, but she always tried her best, listened intently, and feigned comprehension when necessary.

Overflowing with eagerness, she implored, "What ?... What won't I understand? Please tell me. I promise not to tell anyone. I'll even share my secret with you. Please, just tell me !"

Aemond gazed at her, pondering for a moment before finally speaking, "Helaena. Helaena is going to marry Aegon. There's talk of it throughout the Red Keep." He looked downward, as though losing something.

Rhaewina was aware of this, but she couldn't discern the connection. "So what? I do feel bad for her, but they'll surely take care of each other with time. Don't worry about her; she'll be happy," she reassured.

Aemond interrupted her, his tone seething with frustration. "I don't want her to marry Aegon... I want to marry her. Aegon doesn't deserve her... he doesn't deserve anything he's getting. I'll take care of Helaena better. Even Jace was asked for her hand in marriage, not me. And Mother didn't even tell me about this. All these low, contemptible boys were taunting me..."

He paused, clenching his fists, his anger palpable. "They said I wasn't asked for her hand because I don't have a dragon. They claimed that a targaryen boy without a dragon has no manhood. That's why Helaena would never marry me. They all laughed, they all damn well laughed. How dare they? How can they even be alive after saying such things?" this almost came as a shout from his mouth.

Aemond's fists were red with anger, but for Rhaewina, everything came to a halt at that moment. Her little heart felt like it was on the verge of shattering. Tears welled up in her eyes. What she had just heard wasn't what she had expected. Aemond liked Helaena and wanted to marry her. This notion wounded her deeply, beginning to break her fragile heart. She didn't comprehend why this was happening or why she felt such anguish. She wanted to cry out loud, to reach out to Aemond, but she didn't know how to deal with this pain.

She simply hung her head, clutching her skirt tightly to keep from breaking down right there. She didn't want to reveal this vulnerability to Aemond, but it was becoming increasingly difficult to hold back her tears. They refused to be contained.

Aemond continued to pour out his anguish, oblivious to the fact that someone else nearby was also suffering. "I'm telling you, she would never be happy with Aegon," he lamented. "While Helaena and I would have been such a better match. She's lovely, so soft-spoken, an angel descended from heaven itself. Sometimes she shares these unique views that I find absolutely amazing. No one else understands, but I try to appreciate them just to make her happy. Aegon mocks her for it, you know? I understand that her thoughts are simply beautiful musings from her own world, but I love to indulge her and myself by calling her a dreamer just to bring happiness to her. She deserves happiness and nothing less.

She's a Targaryen princess, and I am a Targaryen prince. Our betrothal would have been perfect... so perfect. It would have helped us preserve our Valyrian bloodline's purity. Why can't anyone understand that ? They were even discussing your grandsire, the king, considering Jace for it. Why, and not me ?"

He turned to Rhaewina, his grip tightening on her shoulder as he continued, "Tell me now, why shouldn't I have Helaena just because I don't have a dragon? Why should everything I desire be handed over to someone else just because I lack a dragon ? The dragon has always been a dream for me, a symbol of power and our Targaryen heritage. I wanted it because I loved it, the thrill of riding and soaring high in the sky. But why has it become a necessity now? Tell me !". His beautiful blue eyes were full of anger and pain now, looking like they were becoming darker sec by sec.

Aemond, though for just a 10-year-old boy, had rough hands through cuts and training that now clung tightly to her delicate shoulders. Her tears refused to recede as he pressed her with these questions. She attempted to speak, but her words emerged as sobbing whispers, her voice trembling. "Yes, they are wrong, Aemond... I... I need to go for my dance lessons"

She couldn't endure any more of this conversation. She was on the verge of tears. Pushing Aemond's hand down, she hurriedly fled from the scene. Aemond, deeply saddened by his own predicament, was taken aback by her reaction. He watched her run away but couldn't muster any further concern at the moment. His own pain weighed heavily on him, reinforcing the belief that no one wanted to be close to him anymore. He resumed striking the rock with his sword.

*******************************************************************

Some days later :

In the days that followed, Rhaewina refrained from speaking to Aemond. She gravitated more towards her group of friends, silently finding comfort in the company of Felicia and Joyce. She was profoundly sad, a feeling she couldn't shake. It was astonishing that she even distanced herself from Helaena, her closest friend and dearest sister. The girls who used to be inseparable were now worlds apart, one engrossed in wedding preparations, and the other... well, call it jealousy. She loved Helaena deeply and cared for her, but after the incident, she needed some space. It was the first time she ever doubted herself. She wondered what Helaena possessed that she didn't. Perhaps it was because Helaena was older, or maybe it was something else. These thoughts gnawed at her, and it hurt her to think about how dedicated Aemond was to Helaena.

Many times during these days, she didn't even catch sight of Aemond with the boys during their breaks between training, a clear sign that he was with Helaena. While she sat with her friends and handmaidens. Her heart ached, thinking about how devoted Aemond was to Helaena.

As the wedding ceremony approached, many noble houses were arriving as guests. Even Maris and her sisters attended. Felicia, toying with her necklace, looked at Maris with excitement and asked, "Hey, did you see Prince Aemond?"

Maris replied irritably, "Yes, we went to meet Helaena, who was selecting her rings. I found Aemond there too. He was helping her with everything. I don't understand why ? When Helaena has handmaidens and other private maids, he's there with her the whole time, sticking to her like glue. What does he have to do with a girl's jewelry? The queen asked Aemond to escort me and my sisters to the hall and guide us for our first visit to King's Landing, but after the queen left, he told his servant to take care of that task and said he had to be with Helaena because it was important. She needed him"

Joyce couldn't help but laugh. "Maris, dear, he always does this with you. It's a bit sad. Maybe you should consider waiting for Prince Daeron to grow up."

This comment prompted peals of taunting laughter, even from Maris's sisters. Maris retorted angrily, "I'm not going to follow him around everywhere. Yes, I like him, but his attitude can be insufferable sometimes. What's with his arrogance? Being skilled with a sword and a Valyrian prince isn't that extraordinary. Even a commoner could outfight those Targaryen princes, wielding their Blackfyres and Dark Sisters. Didn't you all see how Ser Criston Cole easily bested Prince Daemon twice, despite the prince having better weapons and the famous Dark Sister that everyone raves about? Aemond doesn't even have a dragon now."

In a seemingly inconsequential moment, Maris's little sister Floris chimed in, looking perplexed. "But sister, he's not that bad. He once told me that I was quite pretty compared to other princesses he had seen when he visited us last time. He even bought me a rose when I couldn't reach it on a tall branch because, you know, I'm short."

Maris swiftly scolded her sister, giving her a playful hit on the back, saying, "Shut up! Stop interrupting me."

Joyce couldn't resist adding, "See, Maris, this is what happens behind your back. Poor you." Laughter echoed among the young princesses once more.

Despite the unfolding events, Rhaewina's heartache grew steadily. Maris's gossip only intensified her melancholy. She couldn't help but ponder why Aemond didn't see her as more than a friend. Why was Helaena, in his eyes, so breathtakingly beautiful that she felt invisible whenever they were together? Did Aemond find Helaena's dreams and fantasies more enchanting? Did he believe that Rhaewina might marry someone else? These thoughts gnawed at her, and it was becoming increasingly difficult for her to bear.Right now in her daydreams she was somewhere else.. lost in thoughts:

How much care is he taking of Helaena? Does Helaena know this? If so, why isn't she fighting with the queen to stop her marriage preparations with Aegon? I wouldn't have married someone else in any way if Aemond had ever cherished me like this. I would even fight for him. We would run away with each other to Pentos or the North if no one allowed us to marry. Aemond would definitely fight for me with everyone else because if he loves something, not even the Gods can take it away from him. We will live together far away in another beautiful palace.

Aemond would build a grand palace for me on my nameday. I would ask him to add more lakes and all types of pretty flowers there, even more than the Red Keep. He might be initially against the idea of having a huge bunch of flowers everywhere, but I would make him agree, as I always do. Our palace would be immense with white and rosy walls, large gardens filled with lakes and swans. It would be the most beautiful palace among all the kingdoms. He would keep me safe and bring me gifts daily, especially a necklace; I want him to give me a beautiful necklace. Later, if the Gods will provide Aemond with his dragon, he would take me far away from these boys if they tried to force me to marry any of them. I might ask Aemond to protect me by dealing with them on my behalf. Wouldn't it be right for me to be happy if he killed people on my behalf?

As a crown princess, it's wrong of me, but if other men hurt me, then it's right for Aemond to take action. I might be sitting behind Aemond on his dragon. Which dragon would Aemond choose? It should be more beautiful than Sunfyre. Aemond said he would love Cannibal, but that's too scary. I don't know what his obsession is with dangerous dragons like Cannibal and Vermithor. Last time, he was bragging about Grey Ghost... Eww, dear God! He should stay away from those huge, horrible-looking beasts. He's small, and they could harm him so badly. I dearly wish he gets a dragon like Syrax or Sunfyre, someone really slender and beautiful, if he's against hatchlings.

Her reverie was abruptly interrupted by Maris calling her name urgently, "Rhaewina... Rhaewina, our clown princess, are you listening?" Rhaewina reluctantly returned to the present, her eyes clouded with disinterest. "What, Maris?"

Maris rolled her eyes and continued, "They were telling me that you're going to marry Aemond. Is it true? Do you and Prince Aemond have feelings for each other? Did your favorite grandsire suggest this?"

Felicia couldn't help but join the conversation with a teasing tone, "Maris, you see, now you don't stand a chance. Even our clown princess likes Prince Aemond. Aemond, who barely talks to princesses, and is notoriously difficult to approach, liked Floris more than you. He'd probably ask his favorite little brother Daeron to marry Floris instead of you now"

Maris's irritation was palpable, and she responded sharply, "Felicia, shut your mouth. I'm not desperate to marry any prince, especially a dragonless Targaryen prince. Prince Lucerys might be little clumsy and small, but he still has his dragon. It's a disgrace if Aemond never acquires one. What's the point of his marriage then? He's the second prince, after all. I, on the other hand, have Blackwoods as an option."

Maris turned her attention to Rhaewina, her tone more serious, "Tell me, Rhaewina, are you planning to marry Aemond? Is that right?.. I would advise against it. Why don't you consider Jacaerys? You Targaryens have your customs, right?". After a pause while looking at her friends she continued " I'm just saying that if you wanted to stay within your house... I mean, you and Jacaerys would be a suitable match. Even Lucerys, perhaps. They seem more like your type, don't you think?"

The others in the group nodded and chimed in with agreements, sharing a small giggle. Rhaewina, although dying inside, pretended to go along with the conversation, wearing a fake smile. She had to keep up appearances, even if it meant hiding her true feelings. "No, Maris, you're absolutely right. While I might have considered Aemond at some point, I don't see it now. I think you've made a valid point. As for my brother Lucerys, I can't say, but I'm open to other possibilities. Don't worry about Aemond; he's just preoccupied with Helaena, his dearest sister. I care for her deeply as well, which is why he's probably not able to spend time with you. I also know that Aemond cares for you, and someday, you two might find happiness together. After all, our queen holds House Baratheon in high regard, even more than the Lannisters and Strong."

As she uttered these words, Rhaewina couldn't believe how she managed to speak so convincingly, concealing the turmoil within her.

[widgenstain]

Saw the movie tonight, here are my spoilerfree thoughts on it. @illfayted17 is going to find them all very boring since we’ve talked about this for like 3 hours, but here we go:

The movie is very very good. I had expectations for it, they were met and surpassed. As I’ve said in the other post, I want to make sweet sweet love to that script, it better win some awards, it was so good, so packed with heartfelt and painful, almost too close for comfort, simply GORGEOUS ideas and they were executed worthily of it.

Andrew Haigh is right when he calls this universal. Yes, some parts will hit closer for gay men of certain generations, but the essence of it and even specific moments, will ring true to anyone of us. I certainly felt so seen in some of the scenes with the mum, and I’m not a gay man in my late 40s and my mum is very much alive.

It helps that everyone is on top of their game, seriously, everyone gets their moment to shine. Forget the reviews not mentioning Jamie Bell and Paul Mescal, it’s probably just because Claire Foy and Andrew are THAT good and their scenes together are at the climax of the movie.

Speaking of climax (hurr durr), this does not deserve to be known as the Paul-Mescal-And-Andrew-Scott-Fuck movie. Is there sex? Yes. It’s even somewhat explicit, like you know what’s going on, but it never leaves German PG-13 territory. I’m a huge proponent of sex scenes supporting the narrative and these very much do, they also feel very natural and “normal”, this is not porn, it’s not meant to be particularly titillating, despite the beautiful chemistry, so don’t treat it as such, please. There’s so much more and more interesting stuff going on in there.

Like Andrew for example! :D I’ve watched and listened my way through 75% of his works and I was so sure that all the reviews going “career best” “like never seen before” were only using The Priest or Moriarty as their reference. Well, I’m not sure about the career best, but he certainly did something different, which is what I love the most about him: He always changes it up. In this case he reins it in; not just his intensity and his sometimes too-muchness, but also the sex appeal. I know that this sounds like a weird compliment, especially with so many people still going “that guy is hot?” and it probably will only be understood in our little circles here, but the way he portrays this innocence and inexperience and shyness, OMG! And then he builds on it in the storyline with Paul. While also being this very intelligent, very grown-up, confident and borderline angry man in other scenes… Seriously, get this man an Oscar nom, come on!

And he’s funny too, there are some great laughs in this, despite the sadness and the way the film plays with the genres it’s inspired by is just *chef’s kiss*

The ending is controversial apparently, I loved it, unreservedly. Except MAYBE the musical cue, which is A THEME in the things I’ve seen lately. Musical interludes or outros that are used to tell me a story, I’m not warming up to that, I’m sorry.

But otherwise, what a great movie, watch it when it comes out, I’ll watch it again when it officially comes out here in 2028, for now I’m just glad that some higher power made the Viennale cool for once and I got to see this. Can’t wait to discuss certain things with you all, and if you have seen it and want to discuss it or have questions, or want to know spoilers, feel free to ask me!

[latin-dr-robotnik]

🎸, 🎤, 🎧, 😘 :)

🎸 Favorite Stage Theme?

Carnival Night Act 2, next question. lol no

In all seriousness, this person right here is extremely partial to Hard Times Act 1, what can I say, I'm a simple guy :P

Though, to be honest, something about the Buxer tracks is so... well constructed, even in comparison to the rest of S3K's already top tier OST. Of course the song itself is from the 80's, but the way it was translated to Genesis, the choices in instruments, those crunchy samples taking over the least amount of cartridge space possible in the game's already gargantuan size. Flying Battery and Death Egg are beautiful tracks, but something about the way they got IceCap working still amazes.

As for 3D Sonic, lately I've been feeling Skyscraper Scamper Night a lot. It's the kind of song I think of when I'm about to stream and I have to pick a Sonic song to play from my almost 500 track playlist. I fucking hate Skyscraper Scamper Act 1 with a burning passion, but you can never be mad at Kumatani's music :P

🎤 Favorite Vocal Track?

Every Sonic Frontiers boss, oh, and One Way Dream.

I cannot possibly understate just how much this OST changed my life. This wasn't my first rodeo, I've been here for years and I've spent a lot of my time listening to Sonic OSTs both new and old. When Forces came out, I celebrated the fact vocal songs were back, and I wanted more. I love Sonic vocal songs, and for a long time With Me was my go-to vocal song. But holy fuck these tracks blew me away.

My expectations were surpassed. Final boss-tier songs playing every four hours or so, and probably my favorite credits theme ever in this franchise. It felt like playing through the final battles of Sonic Adventure 2, Heroes and Black Knight over and over again, all in one game. The bar was set very high before this game, and now it's even higher.

And, of course, I picked Find Your Flame as my absolute favorite. I think it perfectly represents Sonic as a whole. Confident, fighting to the very end for his mission, sticking by his friends, very high energy, very powerful and, in the end, a moment to calm down and reflect on the best things in life, that flame that keeps him going.

🎧 Favorite overall soundtrack?

Sonic Unleashed. It and CD are still at the top, but Sonic Frontiers came very close to stealing that, too. The thing I still love about Unleashed's OST is the overall variety, it's so well-rounded and high quality, aged just as beatifully as the game itself. Also, I live for jazzy Sonic tunes, they always hit different.

😘 Favorite ship?

I see you mentioning KnuxAmy here and there, and I'm a bit guilty of not talking about that underrated ship more. Low-key it's still one of my favorites :P (One day I'll finish that Angel Island fic, maybe)

I'm sorry, I was very busy enjoying the absolutely wonderful state of SonAmy in 2023 :P

And tbh I'm not as active in the shipping side of the fandom as I used to

[nmjackson]

Work Life Balance 𓍝

TLDR Version

DON'T MAKE IT COMPLICATED

Don't give yourself too much to complete

Give yourself a cut off time

Learn to be okay with skipping a day or two

Rant Version ↴

Right after I thought I mastered this magical concept, I woke up late for work, burned my lunch, and came home to go straight to sleep right after work.

The previous week was ✧˖°marvelous✧˖°

I met my word count goals, crossed off 12 out of 14 to-do's for the week, ate right, slept right, exercised, and still had time to do "fun" things like walking my dog or watching a tv show.

First things first, and say it with me, there 👏 is 👏 no 👏 such 👏 thing 👏 as 👏 PERFECT 👏 work 👏 life 👏 balance 👏👏

Sure, there are weeks that are great (and I deeply wish you have a lot of those). There are also weeks that aren't so great. While I can't guarantee what type of week you're going to have, or if you're going to feel great about it, what I can give you are tips as to how I'm learning to get more out of myself as a creative with a work schedule.

Are these mostly generic tips? Yeah, probably. Do you need to be reminded of them from time to time? Yeah, probably.

(Though I don't have a family of my own, I do hope that these tips are useful for you.)

Don't make it complicated

I'm always giving myself weirdly high expectations of what I should get done in a day. Like, "I need to write 1000 words a day minimum in order to be a good writer." Why did I start to think this? When? Your guess is as good as mine. I've changed that "minimum" to something that's much easier for me to achieve, 600 words. That's my goldilocks number right now. Point is, don't make your dreams too complicated to reach, or you won't even try to reach them.

Don't give yourself too much to complete

Your list of tasks and goals should not surpass two to four items. Especially on a daily basis. Obviously, this varies from person to person, but seriously keep it low. I ended up feeling SO MUCH BETTER completing at least ONE THING EVERYDAY and seeing that I actually made progress on my writing project at the end of the week. You're doing too much. Stop it.

Give yourself a cut off time

Ever heard of Parkinson's Law? I didn't give it a whole lot of credit until I really saw it in action. I had given myself a cut off time when I realized I spent most of the day working. Either I'm working at my job or working on my writing project at home. When my dog kept begging me for attention I consciously tried to stop working after 6pm, and wouldn't you know it? I got my work done. Sometimes even before 6pm. It's honestly crazy to have time to do something fun and not feeling guilty about it.

Learn to be okay with skipping a day or two

I haven't worked on any writing project today. And, I'm okay with that. I know I had an off day, so, I will leave it to tomorrow. Will I have a better or worse day tomorrow? I don't know, but I know I need a small recharge now. I also know I'm going to prepare to make writing a priority tomorrow. In the end, it all comes down to priorities, right? So, decompress now, prepare for later, and write later.

Thanks for listening to my rant. Hope this works for you! ✌︎︎♡⃛

[slytherinnbitch]

Accident Part 2

Part 1 of Accident

Exactly 2 days and 17 hours after Malfoy had dissolved their marriage and left, Harry's memory came back. The impact of it was so bad that he was screaming his lungs out by the time a nurse came to check and she immediately called for Healer Malfoy-Potter.

Harry is on the verge on unconsciousness when Malfoy had finally came in, he gives him a vile looking potion and his vision blacks out.

When he woke up again, he was staring at the same white ceiling as always. His head is pounding, he scrunches his face slightly and looks to his left expecting his exasperated husband as always. He finds Hermione instead, with Ron on his other side.

"Where's Draco?" That's the first thing that comes out of his mouth. Hermione looks pained, so he turns to Ron and he has an almost identical expression. And then all of it crashes down on him.

The waking up, and seeing Draco and then oh god- and then taunting him and playing with all his weaknesses and everything that he had vowed to never do again. He had done exactly all that and so much more. Fucking piece of unworthy shit, that's what he is because Merlin he has fucked up so badly that it was surpassing all scales.

And he had asked for a divorce and...and Draco had readily accepted it, as he said....was his faith. And shit shit shit, Reg. What had he told Reg? He needs to grovel at Draco's feet, hopefully he would forgive Harry. And- he can't even think about it anymore.

He closes his eyes, hoping the mortifying feeling would go away. It doesn't. Not even one bit.

"Judging by your reaction, mate. I guess you remember all of it?" Ron asks tentatively, breaking his internal war.

"Yeah fuck."

"I still don't understand why he just did that, why did he listen to you and divorce you?" Hermione inquires because of course she doesn't understand.

"Because that's what he said he would do. He said it at the beginning of the relationship, he'll free me if I ever wanted him to, with no explanations whatsoever. I had told him, he shouldn't hold his breath over that." He smiles ruefully at the memory, Draco had shaked his head at that and kissed him. It had been an excellent day.

"Could either of you just call him? He is my Healer so he must be here, right?" He asks hopefully, something in their eyes tells him that he is very very wrong. They are excused from answering him when Zia enters. She is an assistant to Draco and under his wing, one of his best students.

"Hey Zia!" Harry greets her brightly, just because he is going through internal war doesn't mean he'll just give up his manners.

"Oh, hey Harry. So I conclude your memories are back?" Zia asks somewhat subdued, it's a weird thing on her. She is usually this bright and happy ray of sunshine, so he frowns.

"Yeah. Where's Draco?" he asks directly, she will probably give him a viable answer, but she looks distinctly uncomfortable so he feels the need to clarify, "You know, your boss, my husband and my healer?"

"Yea, yes. He um went home. Asked me to do the last check-up and then you're good to go."

"Did he say something else?" Harry asks because something tells him he is being withheld from information.

"He asked me to appoint you a new Healer because um he isn't going to handle your cases any longer. He was on this one because he was handling it before you asked for someone." Zia says and she looks heartbroken herself, what has he done!

"I'm so sorry, Harry. I tried to talk to him, he just went all cold and didn't listen to a word of mine. Just threatened to fire me and left." Zia continues and boy, his level of fucked knows no levels because Zia is crying now!

"No Zia, please don't cry. I'll... I'll talk to him, alright? Don't do anything just yet? I fucked up real bad this time, just let me leave and I'll try my best." Harry pleads and Zia hiccups softly. She checks his quickly with red eyes and deems him free to leave.

He is out of the doors within an hour with his best friends at his side.

"Mate, just know that we are here and you're more than welcome at ours if Draco kicks you out or anything yeah?" Ron assures him after he tells them that he is going home. Hermione just hugs him one last time before he apparates away, fervently hoping that Draco hasn't locked him out of the wards. The result of apparating inside while being locked out, especially of their customised wards aren't great.

Thankfully he hasn't, because Harry lands just fine on the doorstep of Grimmauld Place. The door opens on its own, recognising his magical signature.

Just as he closes the door, he hears the tiny footsteps of his baby boy and yeah there he is, sprinting towards him.

"Papaaaa," Reg cries out as he launches himself into his arms and it grounds him. It gives him peace and then enters Draco. He looks proper as always, no one would be able to tell that he is messed up. But no one is Harry Malfoy-Potter.

He notices the tiny, slightly out of place hair strands out of place. The clenched jaw as he tries to keep himself together and how he unconsciously keeps brushing his left arm.

"I missed you. Dada said he didn't know when you be back." Reg mumbles into his neck, it's mostly gibberish but Harry understands one and half year old pretty well, as he hugs him still, then he looks into his eyes with slight tears and says seriously, "Dada was so sad," and then he hugs him again.

He was gone for almost five days, it aches his heart how much he was missed by his little love and how much he is loved. He locks eyes with Draco then, who has the mask set in place properly again. He arches his eyebrow at Harry, a silent question that he can very well understand. He pleads back silently as well to keep it until they are alone. Draco gets it.

"I missed you too, my reggie-teggie. But guess what I won't be going anywhere now and we would have so much fun, won't we? We'll ride on the broom again all around the house while Dada goes to work, innit?" Harry asks and Reg beams at him, "And I'll try to make sure Dada isn't sad anymore, yeah?" And he nods enthusiastically.

"Alright, bed time now." Draco calls after an eternity passes with Harry listening to Reg bringing him up-to-date with everything that going on in his life. It seems very important.

He still isn't actually talking to Harry, not that he expected anything else.

"Can Papa read me a story?" Reg asks and Draco nods his head so he looks at Harry who does the same and then they go to Reg's room.

.

After he finishes the second story, he looks down beside him to find Reg fast asleep, he slowly and carefully gets out of his bed and tucks him in properly then starts towards the door.

After peering at his sleeping face, Harry closes the door and places a one-way muffiliato charm, so Reg can't hear them but they can still hear him. It would cancel out the minute Reg wakes up and Harry would get an alert. He and Draco had modified it themselves.

He roams around the house in order to find Draco, finally making way into their bedroom where he is sitting with his hands on his lap, waiting for Harry.

He stops breathing as he slowly enters the room. Draco doesn't object so he is fine. When he stops a feet away from Draco. He looks so frail like this, like he hasn't slept or eaten properly in days, he probably hasn't.

"Well, what is it Potter? I would like to sleep." Draco states, his voice ice cold and a slight shiver runs down Harry's spine as he remembers the last time he had been like this. It had been after Harry had gone on a date so many years back, before he came to his senses that is.

"Draco, please. Don't do this." Harry pleads and Draco's eyes flash dangerously.

"You mean I did this? Me, Potter? Me who has been unable to answer my kid why his other father has not come home except for that he is still sick and needs rest? Me who has been-" he stops abruptly and takes a deep, calming breath, "Anyways, my point is I didn't do a thing."

"Draco, you know I don't mean that. And- and I didn't mean any of the shit I said after waking up," Harry tries again, he knows it's futile somewhat but he can't just give up. "I should not have accused you like that. My last self was a number one arsehole."

"Yeah, he was." Draco agrees but he doesn't say anything else.

"I'm sorry that I didn't believe you or my friends or even my own self, I should have." Harry sighs and rubs his eyes under glasses.

Draco remains silent.

"Talk to me, dammit! Shout at me, scream, tell, punch, hex whatever you want to. Just- just don't keep so quiet, it's so much more hurting than the others, please Draco." he snaps after almost two minutes of complete silence.

"And what would you like me to tell you? That I forgive you and you're welcome back in my life? Is that what you think would happen when you came here?" Draco taunts and shit if he doesn't deserve it.

"Because that's not going to happen," Draco continues, he meets Draco's eyes with all his guilt and regret and he feels Draco's barriers snapping, "What to know why, Harry? I don't care because I'm going to tell you anyway." Draco says casually and Harry prepares himself for it.

"Because you fucking dissolved our marriage vows, you utter bastard! You just went and dissolved everything we had the moment you got to know that we were married! And how bloody dare you ask for my rings?" Draco shouts at him, he has tears in his eyes but he keeps on, "Do you know that mother noticed that the tapestry suddenly didn't have your name tied to mine? Just to Reg? She did and so did father. She told me so when I went to pick up Reg. Do you even want to what hell father told me? How he always knew I was wrong and how you would leave me one day and- and now I had a fucking child to my name all alone and he knew I would be a fuck up all along? Do you have any idea what that did to me? How difficult it was for me to keep a facade infront of Reg. Do you, Harry?" He looks at Harry, waiting for an answer.

"I don't..."

"Of course you don't. You have no bloody clue, and you know what you don't need to. You can fuck off whenever you want and I won't stop you. Who the fuck would I be, wasn't that what you said?" Draco rages on, then he says it again, it comes out utterly broken, "Who the fuck, indeed?" And then he sobs, openly, all masks gone.

Harry can't help but move forward and hug him tightly. He is crying himself as Draco tries to wretch himself free.

"Let me go, you prick. Utter prick, with no fucking-" Draco says against himself and Harry shushes him gently.

"Shh, darling. I'm here, I'm sorry but I'm here now, love." Draco struggles some more before he gives up and hugs Harry back tightly. He can't breathe but who needs that when they have Draco Malfoy-Potter in their arms.

When they finally pull apart, Draco's eyes are red and he is still hiccuping.

"I love you," Harry says softly as he caresses his cheek. Draco leans on his hand and mouths the words back.

"You are still not forgiven, just so you know." Draco says and Harry doesn't know what he shall do. He'll do anything, murder if he has to.

"How can I earn it?"

"Do something about our marriage and I'll think about it." Draco replies after a moment of thinking.

"Marry me, again? It's our anniversary in 12 days. We can do it then." Harry suggests, and a small smile seems to tug at Draco's lips.

"And whoever said that I'll marry you. That too for the second time. One time was enough, don't you think?" Draco teases, and he knows he did the right thing this once.

"A million times again, and it still won't be enough."

"Let's keep it to two, yeah?" Draco suggests as he draws Harry close.

"Promise." Harry says and seals it with a kiss. They are going to be okay, again, he thinks as he drowns himself in Draco's love.

Have at your happy ending, sad ending would have been nice but I value my life a little. Tagging @moramystery @cupofsquirrelfan @justthingsfromsarah because y'all specifically asked for a sequel. Altho this isn't all that angsty.

[gaymershigh]

I'm so excited to find a blog who actually does Male/Gender Neutral pronouns! My request headcanons where GN!MC badly hurts their ankle during PE so individually Malleus, Vil, Leona, Jade, and Jack carrying them to the infimary. Probably mostly platonic but kinda leaning towards wanting to be more than friends?

I'm a sucker for 'platonic with some romantic elements' type of tropes so this is a big yes for me!

Triggers: none

Malleus, Vil, Leona, Jade, and Jack carrying g/n reader to the infirmary after they severely injured their ankle in PE

He knew that you're reckless and bound to injure yourself in any type of way just from how brave you are from talking to him. You called him "Tsunotarou" and you've now been chatting with him as much as you get the chance to or when he appears outside the Ramshackle dorm. Though he doesn't mind it, he knows that you should be more careful.

So when you injured your ankle, he was only shocked for a mere second. Again, it's supposed to be expected when it comes to people like you but that doesn't make him any less concerned. He ran his way towards you and that enough makes other students feel uneasy. Even if you two are closest of friends, you usually spend time without anyone there to see so you two are a very bizarre combo to the others.

He had asked you if you were ok and if you could walk again. Your ankle was sprained and your denial of being in pain almost fooled him if you didn't wince as soon as you tried to stand up. He was a fae, his ability to handle pain has far surpassed any ordinary human so he wouldn't fully understand but can still recognize that you're in a rather agonizing situation.

Malleus had no choice but to pick you up from the ground, not as he minds it but what he does mind is people not minding their own business and just stared at you two, God bless Mr.Vargas for telling them to resume the activities. There was no use if you're trying to make him put you down or get yourself down by yourself as he was way too strong, even if his grip wasn't tight at the moment.

He actually has no idea what's wrong with you, he doesn't know why you can't stand up on your own so you have to do the talking. The nurse persisted Malleus to go back to his lessons and it irritated him but you also shooed him out and told him to visit later when he's free. Very questionable as to why he's free as PE ended but you couldn't care less. He always visits you every day because of how you always manage to make him happy and his heart flutter and he is not sure as to why.

Vil always has loathed your carelessness. He has pointed it out several times and telling you to be careful but you just couldn't help but get into countless troubles and it's not helping that your best friends are intentionally and unintentionally troublemakers. He never gave up on scolding you for your careless actions as he wants his..friend to improve but it does get tiring getting angry over the same thing over and over again.

So you falling and harming your ankle until you can't even stand up without the feeling to cry was not surprising in the slightest, just like what Malleus felt. He facepalms to your recklessness before walking up to you to ask if you're ok but NOT before scolding you, telling you that your actions have consequences and other junk but you never cared enough to listen.

Once you said that you might have sprained your ankle, he dramatically sighed and called you a fool for that. Since even walking you to the infirmary was already hard for your side, he had no choice but to pick you up and asks you to stop struggling or freaking out so much like you weren't gaining enough attention from injuring yourself.

While he's used to getting attention, he doesn't like the one he's getting right now as this could end up with multiple scandals of you and him maybe dating. While he's not opposed to dating you- wait, what is he saying!? He doesn't like you that way, right? It doesn't matter is what he thought to himself at the moment as the main priority is to get your butt into the infirmary and do a three-hour lecture on why you should be careful as the scolding wasn't enough. He called out the people staring as rude and should mind their own business and to continue their PE lessons.

He got really upset when it was confirmed that your ankle injury was rather severe and not just mild as it would take about four weeks or even more to fully recover. He understood fully and left the premises as he does have a class to attend but worry not, he will visit you any free time he has. If he couldn't visit you, maybe a video call would suffice. While he wouldn't treat you like royalty, he would be softer with you as he slightly pities your condition. As you were discharged and needed to walk with a cast, meaning you will be slower than before, meaning Vil would also slow down his pacing as you are his friend! Yeah, friend..

Your recklessness was annoying but also what makes you interesting in the lion's eye. It was so entertaining to see a creature with sentience to have very little to no sense of danger. While he doesn't like the part where he gets involved but when he isn't and you're just figuring stuff by yourself is such an amazing show he could watch forever. Well, as long as you don't get seriously injured or something because truth to be told, he doesn't want you in any type of physical pain because surprise surprise, you're his pal.

So when something Leona doesn't want to happen to you happened, he mentally groaned in annoyance because he needs to get up from this comfy spot under the tree but he's still worried of course, it's just not obvious at all. People would've thought that he hated you or something when he saw him walking to where you are with a dead cold stare. When he found out that you were your cause of agony, he gave you an "Are you serious" look. He's very disappointed facial expression makes you embarrassed even more now.

He spat out a monotone "you ok" line, you thought that he was a robot for a second. You said yes and he told you to get your ass up from the grass and you obliged but failed to do so. When he saw you winced as you were trying to get your left foot standing, he knew damn well you aren't ok and gets more worried. However, his expression never changed. He sighed one more time before picking and throwing you on his shoulder in one swift. Your struggles are no use as he was stronger than you.

He glared at the people that dared to stare, especially to the ones that were whispering to one another about utter nonsense, aka stupid "are they together?" Rumors. He decided to tell the nurse what's wrong with you but it was worded so bad that you had to do it in the end anyway, making him scoffed like he just didn't say "their ankle broke or something". He refused to return to his class because it's boring but deep inside, it was because he wants to stay by your side for the entire time of your recovery.

Even if you're discharged and able to walk with a walking boot, he still stuck at your side even from afar as he doesn't want to see you do anything stupid and maybe twist your spine as he does not doubt that you're capable of doing so because of how unpredictable you are. And maybe it's also because, from all the time he has spent with you during his visiting times, something about you shined more inside him. Inside where exactly? Inside his heart.

Jade loves this recklessness you hold. It's the reason why you're so unpredictable and he loves that about you. One second you will be the smartest person in the room, the next second you almost fall off from the second floor of the school building because some of your papers were accidentally been blown by the wind. While sometimes it can be quite troubling, most of the time it's enjoyable.

But now is the times where it's not as entertaining. He did the wrong decision of not keeping his eyes off you for more than 20 minutes to focus and trying to hone his flying skills as he heard you wailed in pain somewhere not too far away. He walked his way calmly to the source of your sounds of misery and see you lying on the grass with the broom beside you, absolutely helpless. He chuckled at your deadpanned face before asking if you're ok. Whatever your answer is, he knows damn well you aren't as you were wincing a lot as you were trying your best to get up.

He offers to walk you to the infirmary and you happily oblige. Only like two or three people would stare for a few minutes as walking you there isn't an abnormal situation as they did it before as well for other injured students. Just as soon as you two reached the hallways, where nobody is around to glimpse, he picked your figure up and continue your journey to the infirmary. If you asked him why he's doing this, is because it's faster and convenient to do it this way. Also, your face got so red when he picks you up and he thinks it's adorable, making you even redder.

For real though, seeing you all blushed up is quite endearing, he might tease you even more just to see that red face again. Anyways, he perfectly explained the situation of your ankle with some condescending remarks in it. He's a very busy man so he doesn't have that much time to visit you so he wishes you to discharge as fast as soon as possible so he can see your lovely face as much as usual.

So when you do discharge, he would always accompany you to wherever you're going if he's not doing that already. No matter if you need a cast or not, he would always treat you like a patient or even more, like royalty. He believes that he should make it up for not being able to visit, especially since you're always complaining to him how boring it was staying in the infirmary bed for four weeks. He can even get you red with this little special treatment, so why not go for it? It even secretly makes his heartbeat fast as well.

Jack hates people who do not think before doing their actions and you are no exception. Nobody knows how you guys got to be friends to begin because it feels so impossible. Maybe because you two were paired up for an alchemy class project? But he still sticks with you for more than eight months already. Maybe he likes you? Or he's like your low-key guardian? Yes, the latter is the second but the first one could be a possibility, who knows.

That's why he gets more irritated when your recklessness is the cause of your distress. He could take it as your punishment for being so careless and take this as a lesson but knowing you, that will never happen so that gets him even more irritated. He runs up to you and scolds you for a few minutes about why you should be careful and such, it's surprising how he's so calm despite how many times he has scolded you about the same thing. After that useless scolding, he finally asked if you were alright or not. He scoffed when you lied about your ankle injury and have no choice but to pick you up from the grass.

Why would you even try to make him drop you off? It doesn't matter how much you annoy him on the way to the infirmary. If someone's injured he takes thing seriously, especially if it's his totally platonic mate that was in pain no matter how severe it is. He would get rather defensive and would throw hands with people who are saying things that maybe your relationship is more than friends so, please remind him that you're injured and your health is something he shouldn't be easily distracted and fight people who don't know how to mind their business, even though you might not care for your ankle yourself.

You kinda did not tell him what's wrong with you nor did he even asked in the first place so you'll do the talking. He got pretty surprised when you told the nurse you have an ankle injury, even more, astonished when that it's in a severe category now. He didn't like that you were taking your conditions lightly and joking about it too. He's a good boy, so he would follow the nurse's orders to leave to resume his lessons. Just like Vil and Jade, he wouldn't visit you every day as he still needs to prioritize his school life and such. Though, he might cut a tiny bit of his workout schedule to visit you until you discharge.

So when you do discharge no matter if you need a walking boot or a cast or just nothing, he will keep his eyes on you more frequently as he doesn't want to see you do some dumb stunt and hurt yourself again. He would make your stay in the Savanaclaw areas close to him and let you do whatever you want while he works out. As long as you stay nearby and don't wander off. I repeat, he doesn't want his probably future lifelong mate to have a single scratch on their face.

OMG!!!!! I FINALLY FINISHED A FIC DESPITE GETTING ALWAYS DISTRACTED!!! I'M SOOOOO HAPPY!!!!! 😭💜✨✨

~𝕸𝖎𝖗𝖎

[whatisthiswritingthing]

Piano Man - USWNT x Reader

Reader is nervous her first camp and is incredibly shy with the team. She opens up after she relaxes while playing the piano she finds in the hotel. 

Note, I have already decided it will be two parts, but I needed to cut this first part off before I got out of control. It’s also tentatively a Lindsey Horan x Reader, so let me know your thoughts on that.

Note 2.0, anon who sent this, hope this surpasses expectations. 

Sonnett paused in the doorway, listening to the soft melody floating through the large, empty ball room. Y/N flew over the keys of the piano with ease, her eyes closed, playing the song by memory and feel alone. Emily stepped fulling into the room, the door closing behind her, the sound personified in the quiet room; the music immediately stopped, Y/N’s eyes shot to see the blonde cringing by the door.

“I’m so sorry Y/N,” Sonnett rushed out, her voice echoing in the now silent room.

“Oh no Emily, I am sorry. I did not mean to wake you up,” Y/N shook her head, now resting her hands in her lap, eyes cast down.

“Ugh it’s still so weird you only use our first names,” Sonnett chuckled as she approached the younger woman at the piano.

“I’m Ms. Sonnett,” Y/N’s eyes flashed briefly to the blonde before they went back to her lap.

“Nope, that’s worse!” Sonny slid onto the piano bench, pushing her shoulder against Y/N.

“I, oh,” Y/N paused, brow creasing while she tried to figure out how to respond to the blonde defender.

“I’m kidding Y/N, you can call me whatever you want, it’s just going to take some getting used to,” she placed a soft hand on Y/N’s fidgeting fingers.

Y/N nodded her head, hands pausing, “I’m not used to using nicknames or informal use of last names. It’s always been sir or ma’am, Mr. or Ms.”

“It’s alright Y/N, I was kidding, people just never call me Emily except my mom. Lots of people on the team mostly go by nicknames or last names. But if using those makes you uncomfortable, people will get used to it,” Sonnett soothed, rubbing her hand on Y/N’s back. “You’re really good at piano by the way,” she motioned to the piano in front of them.

“Thank you,” Y/N blushed, “I have played since I was little. Playing was supposed to help my dexterity to become a surgeon.”

“You were going to be a surgeon?” Sonnetts eyebrows shot up in surprise.

“According to my parents I was. Dad is a cardiothoracic surgeon, mom is a obstetric and gynecological surgeon. I was supposed to be neurosurgeon.” “Dude, that’s,” Sonnett paused, “how do they feel about you playing soccer?” 

“They, I, we,” Y/N stuttered, “We haven’t spoken since I moved to Arsenal. But last we talked; they really weren’t happy at the idea of it.” She looked down ashamed, “they won’t talk to me until I have M.D. attached to my name.” 

“I am so sorry Y/N,” Sonnett rubbed her hand up and down Y/N’s back.

 “My life was pretty much planned out before I was even conceived. Soccer was never meant to be part of the plan. I got lucky, though, NCAA division one athlete sounded really good to them,” Y/N shrugged, “my parents loved it when Stanford offered me a full ride.”  

Sonnett just continued to nod along, resting a hand on her thigh. Understanding why Y/N had seemed so distant to everyone the first couple days at camp. That she was still working to figure out who she was, fighting against so much of her upbringing. “You should be proud of yourself Y/N. Play me something, then let’s go back to bed.” 

Y/N gave the defender a large grin, bringing her hands up to keys and playing a beautiful song, a melody Sonnett couldn’t recognize but enjoyed. Y/N looked so relaxed, her fingers confidently moving across the keys. 

As she finished, she brought her hands back to her lap, shy about the blonde’s reaction. “I’m sorry for over sharing a little bit.” 

Sonnett tugged the younger woman up, to lead her back to their rooms, she kept a hand on the small of Y/N’s back, “you don’t need to apologize Y/N. You looked so relaxed when you played.” 

“Piano was the only thing that made me feel completely at ease growing up. I used to hate it though, I resented it, resented that I was good at it. Then I had to practice more, so I just learned to accept that they had full control.” Emily pulled her into a hug as soon as they got into their room, “you can be whoever you want to be with the team Y/N. No one here is expecting you to anything except what you want to be here.” 

Y/N tensed slightly in her arms. This was the most she had opened up to anyone, ever. Most people assume she is like her parents, arrogant and stuck-up, only focused on herself. She had spent her time at Stanford and now Arsenal trying embrace her true self, to feel her own feelings for once. It was slow, she was learning, she was developing herself. She knew who she wanted to be, how she wanted to act, but she needed to unlearn a lot of things engrained in her along the way. 

“Thanks Emi- , Um, Sonnett,” Y/N shyly smiled at the defender as they both slid back into bed.  

Y/N was quiet the next morning while she and Sonnett went down for breakfast. As they entered the banquet room, Y/N tried to pull away to an empty table in the back, but Emily tugged her towards her table. “Sit with us rookie,” Sonnett gave her a soft smile, reassuring her. 

They both sat down, Sonnett quickly joined the conversation, Y/N sat quietly, just watching everyone around her. 

“So Y/L/N,” Rose got her attention across the table, “ready for Sammy and I to come kick Arsenals ass after camp?”

 Y/N’s perfect posture straightened up even more, eyes growing wide when she saw all eyes on her, “oh, um, I think it will be a good game.”

 Rose rolled her eyes, turning next to Mal to continue a conversation. Y/N deflated, eyes dropping back to her plate, picking at her food.

 “It’s aright dude,” Sonnett leaned over and whispered in her ear, “just relax, you’re over thinking it.” 

Kelley watched the interaction, tilting her head to the side, trying to figure out their dynamic. Sonnett noticed the other defender watching them, she nodded to the shy girl next to her, trying to encourage her to join them. 

“Hey Y/N, how is the first year at Arsenal?” Kelley caught on quickly. 

“It is good, I am really liking it,” Y/N gave a very basic answer, “the transition from college to profession was a bit of a learning curve, but I think I’ve settled in quite well.” 

“Someone was paying attention in media training,” Lindsey teased her. 

Y/N blushed, looking down again. 

“It’s alright kid, you don’t have to give us media answers, you can answer how you want,” Kelley reassured her.

Y/N turned to look at Sonnett, needing the reassurance, who nodded and encouraged her. Lindsey creased her eyebrows, it hadn’t been her intention to make the younger woman feel uncomfortable, she made a note to find the girl later to make sure she apologized. 

As everyone filed out of the room, Kelley grabbed Sonnett arm, pulling her away from everyone. “Son, what the fuck was the that? It looked like Y/N hated every second of that.”

 Sonnett looked around to see who was listening, “she didn’t hate it, she’s just figuring it out. She was forced into a box growing up, so she’s, like, finally getting to be herself.” Kelley nodded along. “Last night she told me about her parents, it kind of sounds like us. Lots of pressure from her parents to be something she isn’t, trying to fit her into their mold. Just keep your phone on tonight.”  

Y/N snuck out of her room again later that night, Sonnett sat up in the bed, sending out a message to a few other players to join her. 

The group met outside the large doors of the ball room Sonnett had found the younger woman in the night before.

 “Just you know, don’t be jerks or anything,” Sonnett awkwardly instructed before easing the doors open. 

As the doors opened, everyone heard the melody Y/N was playing on the piano tonight. They all eased into the room, doing their best not to disturb her while she played. 

“I’m sorry I woke you up again Emily,” Y/N’s eyes opened, widening when she saw the amount of people there tonight.  

“Eww it’s so weird hearing you called Emily,” Rose scrunched her face up. 

“Yupp, Y/N’s a first name kind of person,” Sonnett smiled, sliding onto the bench like she had the night before.

 Lindsey slid onto the other side, pushing a random key, “Okay, so that was good, but can you do you this?” the midfielder rolled her knuckles across the keys, playing the simple beginner song. Y/N didn’t hesitate, smiling and began playing the same tune on the other end of the keys. 

“Alright Y/L/N, put Horan to shame, show us what real pianist can do,” Kelley teased. Y/N smiled at Emily, she knew what the defender was doing for her. 

She took a breath, feeling the tension ease from her body, her fingers sliding effortlessly across the keys. The players all watched, mouths dropping, she was phenomenal.

It was the most relaxed they had seen the rookie since camp started, her jaw finally unclenched, her shoulders dropped down, the nervous energy that radiated off her was gone. Y/N played the last note, some of the nervous energy returning, her fingers fidgeted with each other in her lap. Tentatively glancing up, she saw the impressed expressions on every ones face, her eyes shot back to her lap, embarrassed at the attention. 

Lindsey hesitantly reached a hand out, stopping the younger woman’s fidgeting fingers. “You are so good Y/N,” Horan tried to emphasize how impressed she was, how impressed everyone was with her. 

“Thank you,” Y/N answered softly, feeling the heat rising up her neck. 

“Seriously kid, that was incredible,” Kelley leaned against the side of the piano, everyone else following suit, coming closer to the timid rookie. 

Y/N tried to resume her fidgeting, Lindsey held on tighter, rubbing her thumb across her knuckles. Emily bit her lip to watching the action. 

“If this soccer phase doesn’t work for you, you could definitely play piano,” Rose tried to jokingly tease. 

Y/N instantly tensed up at the wording, that soccer was a phase, that she would change her mind, that she would eventually do what her parents wanted. 

This time she succeeded in pulling her hands out of Lindsey’s grasp. Everyone now noticing how tense she had become again, knuckles turning white in fists. 

Lindsey let her hand fall to Y/N’s thigh, giving what she hoped was reassuring squeeze. Sonnett rubbed a hand up and down Y/N’s back, “she was kidding,” she leaned and whispered in her ear. 

Everyone could feel the awkwardness in the room, Sonnett the only one with any idea of why the sudden change. 

“Um, not that you have to worry about soccer not working, you’re kind of awesome at that too. Like, are you not good at anything?” Rose awkwardly back tracked, shooting Sonnett a look to try and figure out what she said to cause the tension to return in Y/N’s shoulder. 

“Yea, umm, thank you Rose,” Y/N could feel the heat spreading from neck to her cheeks, stiffly nodding her head, keeping her eyes downcast. 

“No seriously kid, you are fucking amazing. Burke needs to start kissing your ass to get you with us at Spirit. Rose is just jealous she’s not as cool as you,” Kelley flicked Rose’s ear next to her, Rose turned and smacked Kelley’s arm, the two beginning to jokingly swat each other’s hands. 

Y/N flushed even more, feeling the heat all the way to the tips her ears now, she started to wring her hands together again. Lindsey slid her fingers between Y/N’s hands, allowing her to fidget with them. Y/N chanced a glance at the midfielder, biting her lip.

“Alright Y/L/N, what’s the deal? How are you amazing at piano and soccer? You’re supposed to get sports or arts, not both,” Ashlyn asked, genuinely interested. 

“My parents pushed me to play when I was younger, it was supposed to help me be a future surgeon, increases finger dexterity,” Y/N mumbled quietly. 

“Sorry, so you’re a professional soccer playing, pianist, doctor?” Lindsey’s thumb paused its movements. Everyone else’s eyebrows shot up; they had all seriously misunderstood the young player. 

“I am definitely not a doctor, much to my parents disappointment,” Y/N shrugged, trying to hide how much that simple sentence alone hurt. Lindsey squeezed her hand. 

“Well, they shouldn’t be, you’re incredible Y/N. You have worked for your goals, did what you wanted to do, are growing into an amazing athlete, and an amazing person. Be proud of who you are and what you’ve accomplished,” Kelley stopped wrestling Rose, eyes serious as she spoke to the younger player. She understood now why Sonnett had pushed the younger woman to engage with them this morning, and why she looked so uncomfortable. “I get it, we get it,” she motioned to the rest of the women around the piano. 

Y/N brought her gaze up, hesitantly looking at each face, all of them showing sympathy, understanding, approval. She felt understood and these women hardly knew anything about her, but they wanted to. The women on either side of her offered physical comfort easily, neither of them realizing how much it meant, how touch starved she felt, how much she wanted to lean into the midfielder next to her. 

“Like I said last night Y/N, you can be whoever you want to be here,” Sonnett squeezed her shoulder, gently pushing to Y/N to lean into Horan on the other side. 

Lindsey felt the pressure against her shoulder, easing their hands apart, she slide her arm around Y/N’s shoulder, tugging her closer, reaching her far hand across the allow Y/N to grip it again. 

Y/N released a breath, tension easing at the pressure Lindsey kept across her shoulders, her body sagged further into the midfielder. Lindsey let out her own breath, smiling to herself when she felt the younger woman relax at her presence.  

Y/N suddenly felt exhausted, the relief coursing through her, a weight on her chest she didn’t know was there, gone. Lindsey tightened her grip when she noticed Y/N sage more into her side. 

“Alright sweetie, I want to know more about the future doctor, but you look ready to pass out against the Great Horan there,” Ali shot the brunette a wink, causing her blush at being caught. 

The pride player began to shoo everyone else out of the room, allowing Y/N to ease herself up from the piano bench. Ali could tell the younger woman felt embarrassed again, that she wasn’t used to people supporting her so effortlessly, that this unconditional support was new. 

Lindsey trailed beside Y/N and Sonnett back to their room, she wanted the pressure of Y/N against her again, her hand in hers again.Sonnett slid into the room, making sure to push Horan into Y/N and giving her a pointed look, before closing the door behind her.

Y/N looked at the door confused, she was exhausted, she just wanted to sleep now. The interaction with the group had left her unexpectedly mentally exhausted. 

“Hey, I just wanted to apologize for breakfast this morning,” Lindsey started, shifting in place, tucking her hands into sleeves to prevent herself from reaching out, at Y/N’s tilted head she continued, “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable about your ‘media’ response. I should have gotten to know where you’re coming from.” 

“You don’t need to apologize Lindsey, you didn’t say anything wrong, I shouldn’t have taken it so personal,” Y/N reassured.

 Lindsey nodded along, biting her lip, “I would like to get to know more about you, and you give me all the media answers you want,” Y/N smiled. “and I know it’s been said lots tonight to you, but it’s true, you can be you here, you can take your time and figure it out too. They might all be overbearing sometimes, but they’re all here to help you.” 

Now Lindsey did step forward just half a step, she couldn’t help being drawn to Y/N. Y/N bit her lip, she was trying to find the confidence to lean herself into Lindsey again, to ask her for a hug. 

Thankfully, Horan saw the hesitation, and closed the distance herself, slowly reaching around the smaller woman and tugging in for a gentle hug, “don’t overthink it, be you, she seems pretty impressive.” she placed a delicate kiss to her cheek before pulling away.

[judahlux]

“They say about me...”

I have seen many beautiful people since I have been working here, mostly women with svelte bodies, seductive looks with long shiny manes walking the runways. Any man would say he's in paradise and well, how can you deny it. But even I, who am one, can't concentrate on them, and when I see Mr. LaRusso I sometimes think he's a mirage. As if he were not of this world. His beauty and elegance surpasses that of any model who parades for him. But of course, he surely knows that. Everyone says so, but he doesn't seem to take it seriously.

I think it's almost like a painting, I don't know much about it, but I do know that art and beauty are words that should go together and not be separated. Just like him and his girlfriend. They both make a good couple, I saw their faces in the paper before I got here. The marriage is closer than it seems and everyone, especially Mrs. Amanda, seems to be excited. Everyone except LaRusso. It's weird. If I were him my face would be different having that girl, but I'd be lying anyway. If I were him... No. I don't want to be Daniel LaRusso, the distinguished businessman and president of this fashion company. I don't wish to have his money and that Audi that is worth an obscene amount of money. I don't want that.

I think only of her. Amanda. Who will eventually become a LaRusso. One more of them.

Sometimes I just think about that, as I try to figure out how to work a damn computer. As I listen to his soft murmurs on the other side of the door, as I watch him walk into this stinking hole he put me in, but I don't really care.

"You know? It's a shame to have nice blue eyes and hide them in those awful glasses."

I would have liked to say something clever, but nothing ever comes out that can compete with that smart mouth and pious fawn eyes.

"I'd hate to be a distraction to your models."

"Ha. Well, I like your optimism, Johnny."

It gets stranger and stranger every day to have him around like that. Even when everyone thinks I screw up, Mr. LaRusso is there to make it all easier. He smiles and his dimples are marked.

He looks beautiful.

"It's okay, Johnny. I didn't expect you to do it the first time anyway."

With each passing day, LaRusso talks to me more. He sits next to me and talks to me like I'm his friend and not just an employee. As if I know as much about women as he does.

"Believe me Johnny. This whole engagement thing has become martyrdom. I feel like I can't breathe."

"Then don't get married."

"It's so easy to say. Amanda kills me first."

"What about an affair?"

"Are you out of your mind? Don't you know Amanda has radars all over the company? As if her secretary wasn't one of them. That's why I didn't take her on and decided to have you take her place."

"Big mistake. I have no idea how this thing works."

"You're doing fine, Johnny. You just need to stop resisting technology."

Then he just looks at me seriously.

"Sometimes I think you're the only one who understands me, John."

That was the first time he had ever called me by name. It sounded so good coming from him.

"What about a man? She'd never suspect."

At first it was just a joke. I was waiting for him to laugh. But his serenity was very serious.

"What about you, Johnny, do you like men too?"

I would have liked to say no. But he would have known I was lying.

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't crazy about him.

His kisses weren't the first I'd tasted. His body wasn't the first I touched. And yet, Daniel LaRusso became the first man to lead me to my doom.

"Tell me the truth, Johnny. Who was it?"

Talking about it was more painful than I imagined. To be vulnerable after spending so much time hiding under rags in which I hid. Out of fear of myself. Out of fear of others.

I knew something was wrong with me since Ali's body caused me nothing. I kissed her and touched her. And I felt nothing.

Then I met Jimmy. Cute, blue eyes and brown fluffy hair. He was kind and charming. Almost like Daniel.

It was the first time I fell in love.

I was only 17 and I kissed a boy. And it was also the first time I had my heart broken.

"Ali was right about there being something wrong with you. You disgust me."

So I soon convinced myself that the only thing I could cause was disgust. I hid from myself and the world. A world in which I didn't want to be seen.

A world in which the only one who looked at me was Mr. Daniel LaRusso. That beautiful man with a magazine and a fresh smile.

The one who made me his lover.

The same one I fell in love with.

I only made one mistake. Thinking he felt the same way about me.

[beauvibaby]

I hope so – c.hart

requested - yes

You were trying to look sympathetic, you swear you were trying, but you just couldn’t, Carter sat on the edge of your couch. If you were being honest, he didn’t look too torn up about his breakup either, but you knew if anything he just felt bad for hurting his now ex girlfriend. “I told you.” You finally spoke, moving from your spot at the open apartment door, it was late, a little after midnight, you’d be paying for this in the morning while you worked. “Can you not?” Carter snapped harsher than he intended too. “What do you want me to say, Carter? I have been telling you since the beginning she wasn’t going to be cut out for your lifestyle, it’s a lot to handle.” You sighed, sitting beside him on the couch, he gave you a glare before tipping his head back against the couch, his hat falling off in the process, his leg beginning to bounce as he ran a hand over his face. A very anxious tell of his. “Hey, I’m sorry, I know it’s hard.” You whispered, grabbing his hand and sandwiching it between yours. “It’s just-ugh,” he paused, looking over at you, debating on telling you this or not, part of him feeling like you would look at him differently after this. “She told me she loved me, and then I just broke up with her, I didn’t feel the same at all.” He admitted, your face falling as you thought of how heartbroken she must be right now. “You didn’t see her face, Y/N, I feel like the worlds biggest dick.” Carter mumbled, you pulled him down to rest his head on your shoulder. “You’re not though, I know it doesn’t seem like it, but telling her now is so much better than leading her on when you know the feelings aren’t going to show up.” You explained to him, smiling as he began playing with your fingers as he listened to you speak, a sign of him calming down. “I know.” He whispered in defeat, “why do you always have to be right?” He questioned, tilting his head up to meet your eyes. “Because I’m smart.” You retorted, giggling as he tried not to laugh at how seriously you said it. “You wanna stay here tonight? It’s late.” You murmured, trying to ignore the spark in your chest at how he was holding eye contact with you. “Yeah, thanks.” He kissed your cheek quickly before removing himself from you, making his way to the guest room he had stayed in so many times before. “Goodnight.” You called, forcing yourself to go back to bed as you felt a daze wash over you.

****

It wasn’t a good game for Carter, you were happy that it had happened while you were here though, knowing how he could be when he got worked up. You shifted nervously in your seat as they pulled Carter from the game, he whipped his helmet off as he skated to the bench, you tried to catch his gaze but he didn’t dare to look away from his feet. You sighed, slumping down into the hard chair, biting your lip as the rest of the game continued to go downhill, it just wasn’t their night you guessed. It didn’t make it any harder to watch as they made their way down the hall, losing by four, a nervous pit in your stomach as you instantly gathered your things and started heading for the locker rooms.

It felt like an eternity until they started piling out, Carter being the last one as he was analyzing the game in his head the whole time. “Hey.” You reached out for him, half expecting him to pull away and be stubborn, but he surprised you by instantly hugging you. “I fucked up.” He grumbled, you shook your head against his chest, pushing him away so you could see his face. “Look at me.” You demanded, not going to put up with his self pity party. “It was a bad night, it happens, you did your best. You learned from this game and the next one will only be better.” You spoke slowly, making sure he listened to every word. “Ok.” Is all he could respond with as he sighed, it was a good enough answer for now so you let it slide.

***

“Y/N? Is everything ok?” Carter’s panicked voice came over the line, he knew you were supposed to be on a date right now, someone you had known for a while through a mutual friend. “No, can you come get me?” You whimpered, embarrassed you had called him. The guy had been so sweet throughout dinner, he was nice and funny, but then he asked if you wanted to go back to his place, and the smirk on his face told you everything you needed to know. You kindly declined, not in the mood or feeling like going home with him. He got pissed and left you there, of course the one time you let a guy drive you to a date this happens. “Yeah, of course, where are you?” Carter rushed, you could hear him shuffling around his apartment, voices muffled in the background. “Oh, no, the boys are over I forgot, never mind.” You tried to back out, “who cares about them? Now tell me where you are.” He muttered a fuck off to the guys in the background who complained at his word choice. You told him the restaurant and he swore he would be there in ten minutes, easing your nerves as he assured you that he was glad you called him.

Carter hung up the phone and threatened his friends to be out of his apartment by the time he came back. They bregudgidly agreed.

True to his word, Carter was pulling up ten minutes later, you didn’t give him a chance to get out of the car, the second you saw him you were rushing to open the passenger door. You stared straight ahead, ashamed to look at him, the tears now drying to your face. “Y/N.” Carter whispered with a small sigh, he reached over grabbing your hand, urging you to look at him. You looked over and gave him a teary smile, completely done with tonight, and how idiotic men could be. “He didn’t hurt you, right?” He had to ask, giving you a once over, panic in his chest as he thought of how badly he’d want to punch that guy. “No, he didn’t.” You whispered, slumping in the seat after you put your seatbelt on. “Did you want to stay at mine tonight?” He questioned, seeing the tiredness floating in your eyes, it wasn’t even that late, but you were mentally exhausted. “Can I?” You responded sheepishly, Carter smiled at your sleepy figure, only then realizing you still had a grip on his hand. “Of course.” He whispered, not daring to move his hand despite how difficult it made it for him to put the car back into drive. You didn’t notice as you shut your eyes, telling yourself it would only be for a moment, but you fell asleep nearly instantly.

Carter couldn’t really feel his arm at this point, as your head had slumped down against it, but he didn’t care. This was the time where he realized his feelings for you had definitely surpassed platonic. He carefully removed his arm as he was now parked in the garage for his apartment, you didn’t make a peep as your head slowly fell against the seat, he let out a breathy chuckled as he moved around the car to get you. He opened the door, reaching for your seatbelt when you finally stirred. “Hey sleepy.” He whispered, your eyes fluttering open as you looked around, you landed on his face and smiled softly as the memories came back. “Hi.” You mumbled, voice rough with sleep, he moved away to let you get out of the car, tucking you under his arm as you shivered at the coolness in the air, your dress not doing much to keep you warm.

It was definitely not the first time you’d stayed the night at his place, so you easily went and grabbed one of his old shirts to sleep in before going to the spare room. Carter chuckled, making you glance back at him, “what?” You asked, feeling the heat rush to your face. “Why do you still bother? We both know you’re going to sneak into my room in an hour anyways.” He raised an eyebrow at you, waiting for you to falsely deny his statement. It had started once when you were drunk, and now it became like a habit, even when he stayed at your place, you would end up wandering in there in the middle of the night. Carter was so used to it, he basically was waiting for it. “Just come on.” He laughed softly, trudging into his room as you followed.

That night you fell asleep much closer together than you ever had, and it only made it harder for you to deny the butterflies in your stomach around him.

When you woke up before Carter, you took the time to look over his peaceful face. You felt his hand move, only then did you realize it was resting heavily against your side, he mumbled incoherently, shuffling closer to you, hiding his face half in his pillow. “What?” You giggled breathily, not missing the way he smiled into the fabric before forcing his eyes open to meet yours. Even with the way you had forgotten to take off your makeup, the mascara lightly smeared under your eyes, or the way your hair was no doubt a knotted mess on the back of your head. He was just in awe of you staring back at him. “Good morning.” He mumbled, rubbing his thumb across your skin where his shirt you were wearing rode up, “morning.” You responded, searching his face for anything aside from the blissful look plastered on it. “I could get used to this.” He whispered, deciding to bite the bullet as you laid face to face with him. “Me too.” You replied instantly, his smile widened, it going unspoken between the both of you that this was mutual. “Am I really about to kiss my best friend?” You wondered aloud, he laughed softly, moving his hand from your side, up to your face, pushing the mascara off your cheek lightly, “I sure hope so.” He whispered, eyes flickering down to your lips, you pulled your bottom lip into your mouth, his thumb moving down to pull it out slowly. You closed the gap, making him smile against your lips, it was a sloppy kiss, both of you smiling too hard, he tilted your head slightly, making it easier to kiss you the way he wanted too.

You pulled away breathless, “yeah, I could definitely get used to this.” You giggled, shrieking softly when he rolled you to your back, kissing you again. “Couldn’t picture it anyother way.” He mumbled.

Taglist: @heybarzy @kempe @bowenbyram @literarycharleton @kiedhara

[airi-p4]

Ice Dreams - Chapter 1

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | ...

Lukanette Figure Skating AU? Lukanette Figure Skating AU.

I’ve been planning this for more than one year already ( @mamanabeille​ knows ) but Freya’s recent art for me fueled me to finish the first 2 chapters (out of more than 60...)

Header art is traditional art drawn by me about one year ago - Full pic HERE.

Summary

Despite being very talented and loving to skate, Marinette is determined to quit Figure Skating after the lack of decent results and the great amount of stress and pressure on her shoulders.

On the other hand, Juleka and Luka are average skaters in pairs category who, after years of hard work, have finally started showing some good results. But suddenly, Juleka is forced to retire, leaving Luka at the verge of retirement because of his need for a partner.

Can Juleka convince Luka and Marinette to give figure skating a second chance? Can they form a bond strong enough to reach the top and accomplish their dreams? Could something more than partnership spark between them?

AO3

________________________________

CHAPTER 1: Marinette

Figure skating can appeal to people for many reasons: the competitive part, the artistry, the music arrangements, the performances…

For Marinette figure skating was everything- her whole life.

When she was happy, she would love to skate. When she was sad, skating never failed to cheer her up. She was athletic, flexible and talented, gifted by both technique and artistry, as well as tenacity to work hard and never give up. Skating was an irreplaceable part of her life.

WAS.

In past tense.

Because even when it’s pleasant to watch the beautiful programs the skaters have to offer, there’s something that never changes during competitions: the scores are what really matter. Fail one element and you're screwed. Keep the program perfect but with minimum difficulty, you're off the podium. Do perfect in practice but fail in front of the judges: it's over.

This was Marinette's case.

Recently, consistency always failed her in competitions, and it had been a letdown to see how the past seasons had been going blank for her, without any outstanding accomplishment, despite her being on top almost all of her childhood. Her effort, and full potential didn’t show off on her competition results.

Marinette's parents and her coach, Miss Bustier, associated her disappointing results to her mentor’s and grandmother’s passing. But Marinette was well aware that the main reason behind her failures wasn't only how much she missed her granny; the real cause had a girl’s name: Lila Rossi.

It had already been 2 years since Lila joined her training classes under Miss Bustier's teachings. And everything had gone downhill after that.

It's not that she hadn't already been enduring bullying from Chloe Bourgeois, but Lila's bullying was at a whole different level.

The pressure, the expectations, the stress, the bullying, the injuries and damaged property, the struggle her parents went through to pay for her classes and competitions, how she had to sew her own dresses because she didn’t have the money to buy them, how she almost had no friends left... Everything piled up for years and made her finally crumble. Her skating consistency was affected and led only to constant failure.

In the end, she was exhausted, and no matter how much she loved ice skating, she reached her limit. She surpassed her limit.

Lila Rossi had won.

For two weeks now, since her last failure at a National Competition, Marinette had been skipping her skating classes. Coach Bustier was always exceptionally kind to her, and had been considerate (in her own way) this time as well, suggesting she take a few days to rest and get back again when she felt confident again.

But Marinette didn't intend to return under her coaching. Instead, she had set her mind to resign from her classes and, probably, even quit figure skating too.

She couldn’t take it anymore.

The most talented skater of the decade was seriously considering quitting skating for good. And it made her sad, but she couldn’t see any other way out of the spiral of failures she was caught in. No one was there to get her out of the dark hole she was buried in.

She certainly didn’t expect a second chance in figure skating.

_________________________________

During the days she didn't go to her classes, Marinette always spent her time at the Miraculous Ice Skate Rink, where her 'grandfather', Master Wang Fu worked as a manager, taking care of the installation and the opening and shutting down hours, along with the material to rent and the tickets for open to public times. Being her mother’s uncle, she had been babysat by him and his wife since she was a little kid. It was, in fact, Marianne Lenoir, was the one who taught Marinette the skating basics and the one who made her start practicing and love figure skating since she was 3 years old.

Marinette loved her grandparents a lot, and the passing of Miss Lenoir still pained her everyday. After her tragic loss, they became even closer, especially when Master Fu gave Marinette his late wife's earrings as a memento - he knew she would have given them to her at some point, since she loved the dark-haired girl a lot. And with no children on their own, Marinette was the closest they had to a daughter or granddaughter. Marinette had promised to treasure the earrings. They had a ladybug’s design engraved on them, only visible when light illuminated themfrom a certain angle. They were very mysterious and unique, and Marinette had loved them since her eyes had fallen on them. After becoming their owner, not even once she took them off. She felt the luck on her side as long as she wore them.

Except, that wasn’t the case anymore.

Marinette had her own theory of how Lila might have corrupted them when she touched them once, since all her luck was now gone from her side from that moment onwards.

On the ice, Marinette skated a little. But when she attempted to jump, a memory of her last competition crossed her mind and she fell down. Instead of standing up like always, she stayed seated on the floor, tears falling down her cheeks.

"Marinette! Are you ok? Did you get hurt?" asked Fu, worried. Rushing (as much as his old legs allowed him to) to aid her.

"Master-! I- I-... I can't skate anymore!" She broke down to cry even harder.

"That's not true, Marinette. You're just feeling discouraged now because of your recent results in competition. It's normal to feel like that. It will be ok"

"No Master…  It's not just competitions… It's everything… Lila, Chloe, my coach, my parents, my friends…and I miss Granny Marianne so much... I'll never be able to follow her steps now… I should just be realistic and give up..."

"Don't say that, dear. You have luck on your side. Like a ladybug. Lady Chance. You are talented enough to overcome this. I’m sure Marianne would be proud of you, even if you don't follow her steps. And you know? There's no need to compete if you don't feel like doing it. Many people just skate for fun or minor competitions. I’m sure the future has good things prepared for you. You just need to keep moving and you’ll find the right path to follow. And whatever you choose to do, we'll be proud of you. The doors to this ice rink are open for you to come whenever you want to"

That's right. She could skate without competitions. She could focus on something else and have skating as a hobby. Maybe she could make a living out of a figure skating outfit designer…

It was settled. She was quitting. And she was telling her parents tonight.

"Thank you, Master. I know what I want to do now" she answered, giving him a heartfelt hug. Fu smiled at her and patted her back a little, happy to see her smile was back on her face and how his granddaughter's tears had finally stopped.

___________________________

Marinette was very nervous when she arrived home. She tried to sneak to her room without being noticed, but her mother had been waiting for her, with a deeply worried expression on her face. Marinette gulped. 'She has probably found out I've been skipping my classes' she thought, but her mother's mind was focused on something else- more serious. Something the girl didn’t expect or could have imagined.

“Marinette. Calm down and listen to me. Are you still friends with Juleka?”

Marinette blinked: that was not the question she expected. She sighed before answering, confused about her mother’s unusual distress.

“Yes, mom. It’s been a long while since we’ve last seen or talked to each other, but she is my friend”. She paused for a second. “Why do you ask? You’re scaring me...”

Sabine Cheng took a deep breath before answering “Marinette… Juleka is at the hospital”.

Marinette’s mother’s grip on her shoulders wasn’t strong enough to keep the girl from jumping in shock, neither stopped her from panicking a second later.

“What!? What happened to her!? Is she ok!?”

“Calm down, Marinette. She’s ok. She just fainted. She…” Sabine paused, hesitating, before continuing with the explanation. “She’s been diagnosed with an eating disorder”

Marinette felt a rush of mixed feelings forming inside of her: but between sadness and worrisome, anger was the first emotion to come out of her body.

“No…! No way! I’m sure it’s all Chloé’s fault! She used to make mean comments about her body since we were little. Her ideas must have grown bigger in Juleka’s mind! Just because she was taller and larger than many of us…! And now Juleka is…! Juleka is…!”

The spiral of emotions she was feeling ended up falling in the form of tears, again, in a crying whimper. Sabine, worried for her daughter, cupped her cheek and let her cry until she calmed down a little. It was not easy for her to wait patiently to ask her what she had really wanted to know after she had heard about Juleka’s condition, but she knew the girl needed to let it out, even if it hurt her to see her daughter crying like that. It almost felt like there was something more behind the salty water spilling from her eyes, but she remained silent until her sobbing sounds ended, being engulfed by the silence of the living room. When the wait finally was over, Sabine Cheng spoke again, looking straight to her eyes.

“Marinette, I need to ask you something. And please, be honest with me" Marinette gulped and nervously nodded. "Are you eating properly? You’re not throwing it out, aren’t you? I know you’ve always been thin, but I can’t help it but worry about you… You know how common eating disorders are in figure skating… And with what happened to Juleka and how discouraged you look recently…”

Marinette tensed at her mother’s question, more offended than shocked. “Of course not, maman! I’m properly eating what you put on my plate! I would never waste what it takes you so much work. I’m grateful I always have freshly baked bread on my plate”

Marinette’s mother relaxed at her daughter's answer, hugging her.

“Good. That’s good. I’m so glad. So relieved. Thank you, Marinette”. She spoke again after breaking the hug. “I think you should pay Juleka a visit. Here’s the room number and the hospital address. You should be there for her”

“Thank you for telling me, maman. I’ll visit her tomorrow morning”, the girl said, grabbing the paper with Juleka’s hospital contact from her mother’s hand.

“Good girl. I’m proud of you”

“Thank you, maman…” the twin-tailed girl managed to answer, feeling both happy and nauseous for the trust in her mother’s eyes. The thought of seeing disappointment on her parents' face terrified her.

‘No… I definitely can’t tell my parents yet…’ she thought.

_______________________

When Marinette arrived at Juleka's hospital room, she wasn't alone. The door was partially opened and she saw a blue-haired boy standing beside her. As soon as she knocked on the door, the boy noticed her and approached, with an interrogative and sad expression on his face. He was handsome despite his sad expression, Marinette thought, distracted for a second.

"I- I'm- Juleka...?" She managed to say, and the boy just nodded.

“Juleka, you have a visitor. I’ll let you two talk privately" he said, turning his head to the girl in the bed. "Thank you for coming,” he solemnly told Marinette before leaving the room.

“Thank you” she said when getting inside, without looking at him.

It had been a while since Marinette had talked to Juleka. It had been more difficult to keep in touch after she switched to pairs skating some years ago, even if they still exchanged messages and hung out together sometimes.

“Juleka, how are you? I heard you fainted and…” Her feet moved slowly towards her friend as she greeted her, but she gasped when she saw her figure: she couldn't be healthy looking the way she did.

“Marinette. Thanks for coming” Juleka weakly smiled.

“Juleka, look at you! You look so skinny! You have to eat! You shouldn’t listen to what people or magazines say, it’s dangerous! You need to be healthy.”

“I am healthy" she assured her, but Marinette's worried eyes made her admit her problem. "But… you’re right. There’s no need for me to keep throwing out my food. I’m retiring from figure skating”

"What?" Marinette gasped, and Juleka reaffirmed her words with a nod. “Oh no, Juleka! I know you loved it… I’m so sorry for you…” The baker's daughter sympathized.

“It’s Ok, Marinette. Thank you… I’m actually more worried about my brother. We were a team and now his dream is crushed because of me… He can’t compete without a partner and… I’ve wasted everything…”

“Oh, Juleka…”, she warmly hugged her friend.

Not wanting to talk more about her eating disorder, Juleka asked Marinette a question.

“What about you, Marinette? How are things going? Are you getting closer to your dream? You were always first place no matter what! I bet you’ve been improving and setting even higher scores by now. I wouldn’t be surprised if you could even land a triple axel!”

“I can land it, actually! It’s just… for some reason I can’t seem to land any of my jumps lately during competitions… I keep failing over and over… and then there’s Chloé and Lila… You know… I’m thinking of quitting…” she said in a sigh.

“Oh no, Marinette! You can’t quit! You are the most skilled and talented skater I’ve ever seen. Your scores as a child were in another league! You are bound to make history in figure skating, I know you do. You can’t quit!”

“It’s not a matter of skill anymore, Juleka… It’s a matter of results and wasted effort. I just… I can’t do it anymore. I can’t keep my parents overworking to pay for my skating classes with me failing every single jump in competition. I can’t look at their disappointed looks every time I fail their expectations. And Lila’s bullying only keeps escalating while my coach never believes anything I say… I’m not motivated anymore. I don’t have the strength to keep trying...”

Marinette looked devastated as she spoke. Quitting figure skating couldn't make her happy. Juleka knew she would be feeling even worse than herself. She didn't like to see her friend like that.

“Are you sure, Marinette? Because I think it’s a waste. You could win an Olympic gold medal if you aimed for it. It’s just… so frustrating…”

“Juleka…”

After a long silence, Juleka set her determination and faced a surprised Marinette with a serious look on her eyes.

“No. Marinette, I can’t let you quit like that! Look at me. I’ve been forced to quit because of my condition. I wanted to keep skating! I didn’t want to stop! And yet… you say you want to quit. My brother says he wants to quit. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!? You have no consideration for me or for yourselves!" She yelled and then paused to take a deep breath. "Marinette, look at my face and tell me again you want to quit! Can you do it?”

“I-... I want to… " Marinette paused, unable to lie. "I want to keep skating!" She finally admitted. "But I can’t anymore, Juleka! I’ve tried to endure it, I’ve tried so hard! And yet… Nothing! It’s just useless. What’s the point when I’m starting to feel that skating is not fun anymore?”

“Oh no, Marinette, you can’t say that! You can’t give up your dream so easily. Who was that skater you admired? Your grandmother? Miss Lenoir? You dreamed of being like her someday! Graceful, elegant yet strong; sliding on the ice like if you were an angel coming from heaven, announcing salvation to all the graceful public crying tears of joy at your beautiful movements. I know you can do it, Marinette. You just need something or someone to…" Juleka paused for a moment. "Wait, I… I have an idea. Why don’t you try pairs skating for a while?”

Marinette was taken aback at her friend's suggestion.

“What? What are you talking about? I told you I want to… to quit…”

“No. Listen to me. You just need to try it out. You try, and I won’t oppose you quitting if you decide to do so after you’ve tried it out.”

“What’s the deal…?”, Marinette said, unconvinced.

“I want you to take my place. I want you and my brother to help each other recover your motivation, your goals, your dreams. We just got a decent score for international competitions and I… I messed up. He did his best and improved a lot. He could score high, to the top maybe, with the right partner… and I think you’re a better fit partner than I could ever be” she said in a weak sigh.

“But- I don’t even know your brother. And I’ve never done pair skating before! And most importantly- there’s no way I could fill in your place! Nobody can! I'm sure you’re important for your brother, and he doesn’t even know me! He won’t want me to pair with him anyway” Marinette protested.

“That’s my part. I’ll convince him to give you a chance. So I need you to give pairs skating a chance, too. You both still have a second chance in figure skating. And I bet you can reach the top in a few years'', Juleka smiled. Her eyes showed conviction in her words, but Marinette had doubts.

“Are you sure he-?” she started, but Juleka cut her, knowing how the question ended.

“I’m sure. Just give it a try. For me. For our friendship. I want you to skate on my behalf. Please... I’m begging you, Marinette. Just one week. One more chance. I’m sure you won’t regret it. No, I promise you won’t”

“Ok, Juleka… I’ll do it. Just one try. No more. I’m quitting if I can’t keep it up. Or if your brother doesn’t like me…”

“He’ll like you. He just needs to meet you.” she smiled in reassurance and Marinette hugged her.

Marinette, noticing the time, broke the hug and spoke again. "I have to go now, but I’ll come again next week. Get well soon, please”

“Thank you, Marinette. For coming and for accepting my selfish request. I’ll send you a message later.”

“Of course, you are still my dear friend, Juleka. Get well soon, ok?”

“I’ll try… Thank you for coming”, she answered, waving her goodbye. ‘Now I need to convince Luka…' she thought, eyeing her friend crossing through the door.

[nonbinaryparent]

What a day. Long story time.

In retrospect, i kept telling myself, i could also not go to the farewell ceremony of my grandmother. But i did. It was both more horrible and filled with love than i could have expected.

But wow. My parents, who i deliberately don't see, were of course there. My father had gotten hold of my phone number although I had repeatedly made clear i don't want to have contact by phone. He had, without announcing who he was, sent me two texts beforehand. I had blocked and deleted it.

So on this glorious day where we are supposed to be remembering good stuff about my grandmother's life, they both literally cornered me. I was next to my cool uncle who's always joking which saved my spine. I am writing this down so i can remind myself of this out of world spiritual experience.

They were all how are you doing and why don't you talk to us and we miss you. I responded in single word answers. I think it was obvious i was highly uncomfortable with what they were doing. As usual they didn't care about such things. By some miracle my mother left somewhere during the conversation. My father asked if I had gotten his texts. I said i don't want to be contacted through phone. How then, he asked, as if he didn't know the answer. By email, i said. He went on to ask but how can we get into contact? And the often said, i don't understand why, even when I already explained several times that i first want to talk about the past and not pretend everything is alright when it never was. So i said, that is part of the problem, but we're not here for that today.

He agreed. And flipped! I do not remember him lossing his cool so badly before, at least not to me. I was nearly scared. His last famous words, i am giving you all the time you need, but there is a limit! I was very cool because i simply repeated, that's not what we're here for today. He left. Classic abuser words, i am well aware. My uncle was awesome and reassured me and supported me and joked a bit. I never felt so loved by anyone on this side of the family.

Driving back i was overwhelmed with shock at my father's outburst, though in hindsight from what I've read from others, this was to be expected. How could anything ever be their fault? It would have to be mine, that's why he is 'giving me all the time', except he isn't cause there is a mysterious limit that apparent i should fear. It must be so nice not wanting to know he already surpassed my limit long ago and i have zero intention of contacting him ever. I lost my feeble hope of reconciliation today and it was very freeing. Not just goodbye to my grandmother, but more to them.

And the love. The overwhelming love and support from my uncle, i could almost cry with joy. That I live to experience this strong belonging is almost worth the epic failures of my parents today.

They suck they suck they suck. I liked to make believe that one day they will realize they suck, but it's not going to happen, because they suck. I am already infinitely a better parent and adult depsite their treatment, because I know how not to be like them. I'm very much open to feedback and criticism and finding ways to improve myself or a situation, even if it means it doesn't work out. I listen to my kids and take them seriously. I'm not a perfect parent cause that doesn't exist, but i value the kids as human beings with their own needs and wants and opinions. Sometimes too much.

My parents suck, but that doesn't mean i suck. They treated me badly, but that doesn't mean i deserved that, ever. And i got better things to do with my life than get dragged down into this nonsense. They don't even know how old I am.

For real, future me, if you're rereading this. There's so many wonderful lovely people in your life. Contact them and talk with them and hug them. Life is beautiful with them. I'm so proud of you today, keeping your cool. And even if you don't, that's fine too.

Such a long story and not a word about how wonderful my grandmother was in teaching me to draw with watercolors, card games and board games, making soup for me and yoghurt with oats, how she survived bombing in the second world war and moved cross country. I'm sure theres a million things i don't know about, but these are the things i do know. She was magnificent and is proud of me.

[thegothicviking]

As re-entering a link from herzeleid.com never seem to work (??) I usually copy and paste the actual text. Remember a transcription of Flake chatting with fans that I posted from early 00'? Before this Paul had a similar if not the same chat. I have already too long post in tumblr now so it will be broken down in 2 parts!

PAUL CHAT WITH FANS part I

Transcribed by Jeremy Williams

Taken from Rammstein.com chat

October 26 , 2005

_____________________________

Mod: Hello to you all. Thanks for coming out. Paul will be here in just a few minutes. And then we're going to get started.

Paul: Let's go!

niti: +++

Mod: Sorry, there was a technical problem. But the chat will start soon.

niti: +++

**atomrt: how do you chose the sounds for each song because all of them fit perfectly?**

Paul: Thanks a lot! Sometimes that works out well, sometimes not so well.+++

**maria: Your album covers have always sparked a lot of controversy. Which cover is your favourite and why?**

Paul: The cover for Sehnsucht was the most dramatic in my opinion.+++

**Benzramm: What was coming out of the fake penis during the live act "Bück Dich"? **

Paul: That was water with Ouzo to make it milky.+++

**Beurgueur: Good evening, Have you ever thought to write a metal-opera based on rammstein’ story?**

Paul: Hopefully not. We have enough theater elements already.+++

**MafiUndomiel: I was at River Plate Stadium in Argentina, 1999, when you toured with KISS. You did almost surpassed KISS music and show with your impact, and many people was really impressed. I still remember the silence during Du Hast, as Till was singing the refrain. What do you remember of Argentina, of this show? **

Paul: Yeah, that was unbelievable. It's a shame that we can't play in South America this time. Flake was seriously ill.+++

**MafiUndomiel: Did Till write Te Quiero Puta on his own, or had some kind of external help? I know it's not very complicated, nor elaborated in the lyrics, but it's not easy to put two or three sentences together if you don't know the language... believe me! I'm still trying with German!**

Paul: He had some help from his girlfriend and from Flake's friend from Chile.

Paul: But Till can already speak Spanish so well that he only had a few questions about grammar.+++

**monkeyman: What type of gear do you use when recording in the studio?**

Paul: This would take two hours to list. Too much for now. Sorry.+++

**Hugo: Why did you choose almost the same cover for the japanese version of Reise, Reise and Rosenrot? **

Paul: Because we thought it would be a shame to use the cover only for the Japanese edition.+++

**MafiUndomiel: There are many bands that edited DVD and VHS with the footage they got when they recorded their albums, the creative process and all that stuff. Since many R+ fans are really interested in knowing "Rammstein's kitchen", have you considered releasing something of that kind?

** Paul: I filmed some of the footage during Reise, Reise and it will come out sometime on a DVD as bonus material.+++

**blastedop: What happened to Live DVD? It was delayed? **

Paul: Yeah a little bit, but we're going to try to do it this year.+++

**MafiUndomiel: I wanted to know how did you put your setlists together when you go to a country you've never been... you mix old and new material, or you prefer to show your new material above all, and play only the "classics"? **

Paul: We play a mix of both old and new.+++

**Jenna: As you are possibly the most successful band from Germany (singing in German) that you are expected to represent German music and culture to the rest of the world? **

Paul: It was never our plan to play all over the world.

Paul: Sometimes we wonder ourselves how this all happened.+++

**beurgueur: what american film director would you enjoy to make a ckip with **

Paul: Tarantino.+++

**Benzramm: Did you ever get hurt when you were working with fire on the live acts ? **

Paul: Sometimes.+++

**aeon: One Rammstein member said you had a movie project with Werner Herzog. Do you think this project will be carried out and would you like to act in something different from Rammstein videos ? **

Paul: It's been awhile with WErner herzog. Maybe it will work out, there's still a plan to do it.

Paul: +++

**Rammsteinizied: Dear Paul: What is your favorite live performance effect? (like the flamethrowes in Feuer frei or the bow in DRSG) **

Paul: The nose flame throwers that we use in Feuer frei!+++

**MafiUndomiel: Which was your first guitar? Do you still own it? **

Paul: It was a Telecaster copy. A cheap one. I gave away my first guitars at an auction for a good cause. No idea whether it worked out.+++

**Straya: This has been in my mind for a while now, and I must ask. From the sample songs on the official site, it seems Rosenrot might be your 'hardest/loudest' albums, the songs seem 'hard', in a way, like Ich Will, Feuer Frei, and Mein Teil; what do you think of this? **

Paul: I don't think so. There are fewer sequences so the guitars come out better.+++

**Synthema: Do you still feel that being in Rammstein is almost like being in a six-way marriage? Does the band still function as a tight a unit or have things drifted apart? **

Paul: Yeah.

Paul: We're still together. Knock on wood. We've been together for 10 years and now that we've gone through our crisis, we feel better than ever.

Paul: We've got money, success, beautiful women and all the rest.

Paul: Things can only get worse.+++

**Jenna: Do you think your videos help to stop you taking yourselves too seriously? **

Paul: We've always taken ourselves less seriously than many people think. our best friends know this.

Paul: At the moment, we don't feel like making any humouress videos.+++

**whiskeypapa: When writing a song, how many/what kinds of revisions does the song go through before finally making it onto an album? **

Paul: Some songs make it out directly as we conceived them. With other songs, we make 20 versions and they still don't make it.

Paul: +++

**Noora: HI! I'm a fashion and design student from Finland and I was wondering about your stage costumes...How much do you participate in the designing and making of the outfits that you use on your tours? I understand that every album has its own look. Do you first design the outline of the look as a band and hen consult a designer and maker? Thanx and welcome back to Finland! :)**

Paul: Most ideas come directly from the band. For the last outfit, we had the idea to combine Bavarian folkloric outfits with industrial.

Paul: Because Bavarian folklore is not very cool and we like to mix things that you're not supposed to.+++

**Beurgueur: Have you ever thought in what your life would be now if rammstein never was created?**

Paul: No. We don't think that way.+++

**minx: It’s been stated in several interviews that the band has two pyromaniacs in the group, but is there anyone who is not so fond of fire?**

Paul: Everybody in the band has a different specialty.

Paul: Each of us is really equally important.

Paul: It doesn'T matter what each does, it could be better when two are on vacation during preparation and actually help us to make a good video this way.+++

**Badeend: Who thinks of the titles of the cd's? Is it some kind of democraty or is it 1 man that decides?**

Paul: We make the decision as a group but it's not really a democracy. More like a board of directors.+++

**Biz: How have older industrial bands (such as Laibach or KMFDM) influenced you?**

Paul: A lot.

Paul: Also Ministry.+++

**minx: What is the oily black/brown liquid that you are all covered with on stage? Is it a fire retardant liquid?**

Paul: No.

Paul: That's a secret.+++

**minx: Why did you wear a paper bag over your head at the concert in Tallin, last November?**

Paul: I wanted to display an Iraqi prisoner.

Paul: There's a photo of a guy behind barbed wire and he's holding his son but he has a bag on his head.

Paul: That photo really had an impact on me.+++

**aeon: Why do you only do signing sessions in London and Paris? Why not in other big cities f Europe or even Germany? Or is anything planned? **

Paul: Actually we've only planned for Paris. London snuck in at the last minute.

Paul: I don't know any more signing sessions details right now.+++

**Badeend: Did you take gitar lessons or did you teach it on your self?**

Paul: Self-taught.

Paul: +++

**minx: I am going to be at the signing in London on Sunday. Do you enjoy doing those types of promotional events or are they just ‘hard work’?**

Paul: Sometimes it's a lot of fun but other times it can be exhausting.+++

**Synthema: It could be said that the "Rosenrot" photos are quite a departure image-wise from what one would expect from the band. Was this something that was decided by the band for a particular reason, or is this the sort of decision that is out of your hands? Does your management or record label have much control over how you present yourselves, or is that left to you?**

Paul: We don't like to repeat ourselves.

Paul: Usually the band always has the last word on these amtters. But weR'e not always interested in all of the details.+++

**Badeend: What is the new instrument you used in the song Te Quiero Puta?**

Paul: Trumpet.+++

**beurgueur: do you think you'll be on stage again when you'll be 60? (like rolling stones for example...)**

Paul: Hopefully somebody will die first. Then we won'T have to worry about that.+++

**minx: Do you do you all do own make-up for the shows?**

Paul: Yes.+++

**OK-River: Will Rammstein play again "Bück Dich" in a concert, or it is something of the past?**

Paul: I wouldn't say no.+++

**blastedop: Rosenrot is so diferent from Reise Reise. How is this possible if these songs are from Reise Reise recording season?**

Paul: I don'T think so. Listen to the whole album.+++

**Benzramm: Are you a sort of scared when flake is going with his boat in the public ? **

Paul: No.

Paul: But it was always Oli last year.+++

**whiskeypapa: Which of your songs invokes the most emotion from you?**

Paul: Seemann.+++

**MsBehaviour: Greetings from Finland and good evening! My question is, you have been playing together as a band for quite a many years now, and there is a big difference in the sound of Herzeleid and the sound of Reise Reise. Does this "evolution" come naturally to you, or do you make conscious decisions as to where to direct your sound? How do you feel about the change?**

Paul: There are some of us who want to stay the same.

Paul: There's some of us who want to always change.

Paul: These parties fight each other and the result is a new album or a black eye.+++

**MafiUndomiel: Have you heard a cover version of Keine Lust made by a Russian guy called Miguel? What did you think about it?**

Paul: Not yet, unfortunately.+++

**Badeend: Do you have a private jet or do you have to rent a plane?**

Paul: When the record company pays, we fly Business. When we have to pay, it'S Tourist class. Sometimes, when the connections are difficult, we rent a litlle jet.+++

**luna: First "Snow White" now "Rose Red". Do the members of Rammstein have a fondness for fairytales?**

Paul: Who doesn't?+++

**Synthema: Do you still enjoy performing live after all these years, or is it more of a chore now?**

Paul: If we didn't like it, we wouldn't have been around so long.+++

**Benzramm: Is there a double meaning in the songtexts of your songs ? **

Paul: Yeah. But the subtleties and double-meanings get lsot in translation.+++

**Badeend: What is your favorite song or cd?**

Paul: Kill Bill 1.+++

**DRS2G: Is "Hilf Mir" inspired by a Heinrich Hoffmann's tale?!**

Paul: Yes.+++

**Synthema: Have you ever felt that the success of Rammstein has been a negative thing for you in your personal life? That it makes it difficult to decide who to trust and who not to?**

Paul: It is difficult to stay normal despite money and success.

Paul: We fight this on a daily battle but we usually win.+++

**Beurgueur: from a viewer: what guitar do you use for your c tuning, and what guitar does richard use for this?**

Paul: I play a Gibson Les Paul and Richard plays ESP guitars.+++

**Benzramm: Did you really go to the mountains for the videoclip "Ohne Dich"?**

Paul: Yes. The was the funnest video of them all.

Paul: The thin air up there was difficult.

Paul: I'm impressed by mountain climbers who go even higher.

Paul: It was difficult for our crew and us.+++

**MafiUndomiel: how did you and richard decided who was going to be lead and who rythm guitars?**

Paul: Good question.

Paul: We're both stubborn.

Paul: It's a fight every time but we're still doing alright up to now.

Paul: Actually, the winner is supposed to be the one who plays the best solo.+++

**Badeend: Do you still have to take guitar lessons to play better?**

Paul: No.+++

**blastedop: Do you visit fansites? How about a Top 10 Fansites in the official page?**

Paul: From time to time.+++

**Badeend: Why did you pick just that girl for the Texas vocal in Stirb nich vor Mir?**

Paul: It was our producer's idea.+++

**MafiUndomiel: Paul, is there any country that you´d like to visit or going on tour, and you haven´t yet? Why?**

Paul: Yes, we would love to go to Turkey, Mongolia, Iraq. We know we've got lots of fans there.+++

**Jenna: Which current musicians (Not youselves, I'm sorry) do you think are creating the best work at the moment?**

Paul: System of a Down, Muse, Snoop Doggy Dog, Eminem, Slip Knot, etc.+++

**Rammsteinizied: Dear Paul, How do you feel about us fans?**

Paul: It's an honour.+++

**Minx: Do you have a favourite guitar part in a particular song you really enjoy?**

Paul: +++

**DRS2G: Will "Rosenrot" be the 2nd single from your new album?!**

Paul: Yes.+++

**Straya: I'm wondering how this question has not come up yet... but, plenty of people are asking if you guys will tour in America and Canada. I don't mean for this to be one of those annoying questions. But, has anything be talked about?**

Paul: I'm certain that we'll tour North and South America with our next album.+++

**rammsteinuk: I read in a recent interview that there were some arguments within the band during the production of 'Mutter'. Have there been any more strong disagreements like this since?

**Paul: Thankfully not. There's always stress when six stubborn people meet, but nothing serious.+++

**minx: Most influential musician on yourself?**

Paul: Laibach, Ministry, Metallica, Nirvana.+++

**blastedop: Did you like Benzin video? Schneider didnt.**

Paul: I don't think it's that bad.

Paul: We've had three really good videos in a row, so it'S hard to keep the standards so high.

Paul: I'm glad that there's some variation, next time we'll improve.+++

**whiskeypapa: First, Reise Reise saw a "country moment" with Los, and now Rosenrot has Te Quiero Puta. If you could make a fusion of Rammstein and any other world music (for fun), what would it be?**

Paul: Yes, I interested in all combinations of things that don'T fit together.+++

**Biz: Are there any downsides to being famous?**

Paul: We're famous but we can still buy groceries in Berlin without bodyguards.

Paul: We've got nothing to complain about.

Paul: Our band is famous around the world but we still have normal lives, thank God.+++

**minty: Paul are you looking forward to the world cup next year? who will win?**

Paul: Yes. It doesn'T look good for Germany right now.

Paul: I hope that a miracle happens.+++

**aeon: Do you hope your music will still be appreciated in many years from now or it doesn't matter to you ?**

Paul: I think that we're relatively timeless.

Paul: But that'S probably what every band thinks and two years later nobody cares ...+++

**DRS2G: Was it good to be directed by Jonas Akerlund?!**

Paul: Yes, he's just a cool guy.+++

[cafedanslanuit]

♡   f l u f f v e m b e r   2 0 2 0   ♡ 

♡  week one  —  kageyama tobio   |   long-distance relationship

♡  summary  —   getting into a relationship with kageyama was close to impossible, that you knew. nevertheless, that didn’t stop you from developing feelings for him and eventually becoming more than friends. he was constantly training and didn’t have a lot of time to spend by your side, but once kageyama found himself remembering your laugh on his way home, he decided to do whatever it took to make the relationship work.

♡  playlist

the moon song   -   beabadoobee & oscar lang home   -   bruno major blueberry eyes   -   max & suga

♡  masterlist  ♡

Every morning, Kageyama wakes up at the same hour. He puts on his running shoes, grabs his phone, keys and earphones and hits the streets. It’s been his routine since he started playing volleyball. While he ran, Kageyama preferred to keep his mind focused in his steps, the weight he was putting on his heels and toes, his heart rhythm and his mind replaying the sets he had done the day before. He didn’t see running as something he did before he trained, but as part of the training itself. Kageyama was very adamant against listening to music or a podcast during his morning runs. 

Everything changed after he met you.

Kageyama puts on his earphones and goes through his mail inbox. Like most days, he sees your name on his most recent unopened email. He downloads the audio attachment and presses play before shoving his phone back to his pocket.

“Good morning Tobio!”

His lip twitches upward.

“So, you must be sleeping right now. Which sucks! Because I just got home from work. Yes, I got safe, don’t worry. Mika and her boyfriend dropped me at my place right now. Remember Mika, my coworker? Yeah. Hey boyfriend always picks her up when we have shifts until one in the morning and they drive me home. I’m kind of tired right now.”

Kageyama hears a long yawn on your side, followed by a thud that he imagines it’s you laying on your bed.

“Let me put on some music,” you say, and a few seconds later he listens to a tune he thinks he’s heard before. “Today’s classes were just okay. I got a grade back but it wasn’t what I expected.”

“But, what can you do?” Kageyama mouths along with your voice.

“Work was also okay. Mika and I spent most of the night talking, she had had a small fight with her boyfriend and asked me for advice. It wasn’t really a big thing, you see…”

The next few minutes, Kageyama listens to you ramble about your friend and her boyfriend, but he has to admit he is paying more attention to your voice than what you were saying. He imagines himself watching you talk and the expressions he had seen you make the first time he had seen you. The tip of your tongue sticking out between your teeth after you laughed at something you shouldn’t have laughed about, the slight pout on your lips as you talked about something you didn’t like or the attentive way your eyes fixated on him while he talked about volleyball.

“Anyway, I know you don’t really care about this,” you say. “But it’s really nice to imagine you listening to me talk during your morning runs. Is it already cold there? I hope you put something on if it is. Not trying to tell you what to do. I know you, more than anyone, take your health very seriously, but I guess I can’t help but worry,” you chuckle. You stay quiet for a moment, and Kageyama basks in the comfort your silence provides.

His mind goes back to those Sunday nights when he’s watching past games on his laptop while he’s face timing with you. You are usually taking a cup of coffee, trying to forget you’ve only slept five hours after getting home from your shift at the bar. You know he has to get to bed in a couple of hours so he can get enough rest for this Monday practice, so you treasure those small moments when the time difference and both your busy schedules let you share a moment. Kageyama’s eyes are fixated on his laptop and you take the opportunity to revise some of your lessons, most of the time finding out there was a paper due next week you had forgotten about.

Every once in a while you take a look at your phone and see Kageyama’s dark eyes glued to his laptop. You bury your nose on the Schweiden Adlers hoodie he sent you last month and even if your boyfriend’s smell has almost completely worn off, you still find comfort in wearing his clothes.

When Kageyama comes back to his house to get ready for training, your voice is no longer in his ears. You always made sure not to surpass the usual time he spends running. He takes a look at the dual clock on his phone and realizes you must be still in class, so he refrains from sending a text and hops on the shower.

The fourteen hour difference between the both of you had seemed like a wall impossible to climb. Not only that but his intense training schedule plus your uni classes and your part time job also took most of your energy and it was a rare occurrence that you could sit in front of a computer at the same time.

But the connection was something he had never experienced before. He had been invited to a foreign university overseas for a tournament. The day before it started, the team had gone to the campus to get to know the facilities, and after they were done, Kageyama had left them to buy something to drink from a vending machine. Not being able to find any, he asked for directions and took the elevator to the cafeteria, not noticing someone carrying a couple of books under their arms standing next to him.

Now it seemed almost fate to remember how the elevator malfunctioned and he had to spend the next two hours with you. After pressing the Emergency button and being told it would be a while, you introduced yourself with a smile. He wasn’t really enthusiastic about getting to know each other but it all changed after he mentioned he was there because of a volleyball tournament. Kageyama can still remember your eyes widening and the questions that followed, all centered about his true passion. A few minutes later, you were sitting on the floor of the elevator, while he explained in broken English every position in volleyball and what they were supposed to do. Even though you hadn’t played any sports seriously outside of school, the fact this guy was talented enough to get invited overseas to play had spiked your attention, and you asked question after question so you could understand more about volleyball.

“So the setter is basically the key player, right?” you had asked, while he scribbled on the notebook you had lent him so he could explain.

Kageyama tried not to smile. He really did.

After you asked him about the tournament schedule and wrote down the name of his team, you promised you would do your best to make it to the game. Kageyama had never really cared about people coming to his games to watch but, once he had won the first game as was leaving the court, his eyes unexpectedly met yours and he saw you waving at him for the bleachers with a smile. He nodded at you and as he disappeared through the gym door he thought maybe someone going to see his games wasn’t so bad.

One week later, Kageyama’s team had won the tournament, and since you had asked for his number while waiting inside the elevator, you offered to buy him something from the cafeteria after the final match. This time, he took the time to listen to you ramble about your career, and how enthusiastic you were about it. He didn’t understand most of the things you talked about, most of your words sounding foreign and new to him. But the one detail he did recognize at first glance was the way your pupils dilated while you spoke. Your hands moved faster than usual as you tried to explain, and you even used the salt shaker on the table as a prop to help you out. The glimmer in your eyes was the same nature as the burn he used to feel in his chest whenever he talked about volleyball. You promised to stay in contact and gave him a small but tight hug when it was his time to leave. He hoped you didn’t notice the pink tint on his cheeks before you went away.

Your love confession came two months after he was back in Japan, followed by the longest and hardest conversation the two of you had ever had. He explained his strict training schedule and you talked about your university increasing the hardness of the classes you took and how little time you had left. A long silence filled the room, and you realized maybe you should have kept the confession to yourself. It was never going to work. There were too many impediments so maybe it would have been better to push down whatever you felt. In the end, you two weren’t supposed to meet and--

“I’d like to try it.”

You can still remember the blush on his cheeks and furrowed eyebrows after blurting out those words. You smiled brightly at him and nodded, enthusiastically.

“I’d like to try too.”

It had been one year and six months since then. To find someone who not only understood his crazy schedule but was passionate about their own work felt surreal to Kageyama. Your plan was to finish your career in your home country and then move to Japan. You had been auditing the Japanese classes at your uni and taking a part time job to be able to support yourself as you settled in a new country. All of those changes meant less time to be able to talk with Kageyama as much as you did before. He assured you he understood, even if he would never admit out loud he missed you as well.

The situation prompted you to find other ways to feel close to him, hence why Kageyama woke up almost every day with a new audio file from you. You went from talking about your day to making him listen to music and even took the chance to practice your japanese. His English listening skills had also gotten better in the past year, all thanks to talking with you and how you would slow down your pace and repeat yourself if he ever needed to. While you recorded your audios after work, he usually recorded his after practice while he walked home from practice. Even if he was always a little worried about the length, you always made sure to send him messages about how happy you were to hear his voice while you ate your lunch or walked to your job after your classes.

Kageyama finishes his shower and comes back to his room. He gets ready in less than ten minutes in silence, knowing he doesn’t have any time to spare if he wants to get to the practice in time. Winter break is a month away, and he wants to give his best before he’s forced to step away for a couple of weeks. He has never liked holidays stepping in his routine, but he knows there was nothing he could do but endure and wait for his training to resume.

Before he leaves, Kageyama checks his phone again and opens the newest email.

Congratulations! Your flight booking is confirmed.

Okay, maybe he is looking forward to winter break after all.

[shimmershae]

So.  Thanks to my new anonymous friend, this is going to become a thing.

Shae’s thinky thoughts about the latest episode--Acheron:  Part 2--beneath a cut. 

Because spoilers, however vague they might be.  

Let’s be real here.  This is more a stream of consciousness than anything else so if that’s not your thing, you are most welcome to nope right on out of this post.  Trust me.  I’ll completely understand, lol.  Sometimes?  I wish I could nope right on out of my own brain and the way it operates.  

That said?  Without further ado--

Episode 2′s opening, though.  Maggie trapped with hungry Walkers converging?  It totally gives me Glenn under the dumpster vibes.  I don’t know if that was intentional or just happy coincidence but way to link Maggie to her dearly departed better half, show.  

Is it just me or has Father G had more OOMPH to him these last few seasons?  Again, I have to ask--Rosita’s influence or no?  Regardless, I bet Seth Gilliam is loving the job these days.  

Side note:  am I gonna have to go to bed early every Saturday night from now until the end just so I that I might be able to SEE?  Something?  Anything?  My curtains are flimsy-ass.  I admit it.  But this is more frustrating than TXF.  Angela, WTF?  

No, seriously.  It’s like complete guess work who’s in these subway scenes.  Some of that has to do with them being overly populated by redshirts and the rest of it has to do with me having to squint and turn sideways to make out their facial features. 

Look at Daryl busting through concrete walls!  Should I call him the Kool-Aid Man considering NR has once again allowed himself to be led right into a biased, shipper trap?  Hmm.  I might.  

Imagine seeking refuge in those dark, filthy subways.  Any second now I expect to hear the skittering of rats.  Will Dog lose his effing mind a la Divergence?  He’s been shown to go off half-cocked that way, lol.  Oh well.  Guess it’ll be in character if he does.  

Impressive graffiti storyboards.  Does it mean something that it immediately cuts to the Commonwealth storm troopers afterward?  Maybe.  Who really knows at this point?  They been trying to gaslight us forever.  

LOL at Princess yet again.  Yumiko is just like da fuq is this person?  

No, really.  LMAO.  “That was her.  From last night.  Did you see how she was looking at us?”  

Then you have Eugene, hahaha.  “Oh God.  Why did he tell off the big guy?”  Like the man is totally me in this type of situation.  Not even gonna lie.  

“That’s right.  We want to talk to the manager.”  

I literally cannot wait ‘til Carol and Daryl meet Princess.  Can.  Not.  Wait.  

How sad is that note on that $100 bill?  Small moment but it totally gives me Season 4 vibes when they were on their way to Terminus seeking sanctuary.  

Hmm.  Remember how that place wasn’t what they thought it was?  I’m sure neither is the Commonwealth.  But I feel like what’s left of Team Family is totally going to do Rick proud, lol, and prove they’re messing with the wrong people if they try something.  

Daryl, Man.  You gonna have to get a better handle on your headstrong Fur Son.  I wonder if Dog would listen better to his mama?  Things to ponder.  

Sounds like Miko has this group’s number.  Or does she?  

Princess and Eugene totally look like they’re waiting their turn for the Principal’s office, LOL.  

“Stop moving!  You’re taking my nerves over the edge to a proverbial 11 on a scale of 10.”  I feel you, Eugene.  I do.  Also you, Princess.  Two of the most relatable TWD characters right there, I’m telling you.  

Princess is me when I really, really, really have to pee.  TMI?  Sorry, lovelies.  LOL.  I just...she’s so relatable.  

LMAO.  “If that fine ass dude in the orange suit...”  Princess and Mercer incoming in 3-2-----

Princess’s excitement over the toilet paper=PRICELESS.  

Eugene, Man.  You desperately need to develop a poker face.  

There’s Daryl getting another cool camera shot.  Angela?  You playing favorites again?  

Carol’s claustrophobia could have never.  I bet that’s in the back of Pookie’s mind.  You can’t tell me it’s not because Carol lives in there rent-free.  

Ohhh.  Back to the subway car.  Looks like we got the Maggie redshirts leading the way.  First sacrificial “lambs”?  

Maggie pistol-whipping Negan was kinda deserved, but he wasn’t all wrong so.  

Damn.  I’m no Gage fan.  He can fuck all the way off for what he did to my baby Lydia.  But Maggie over there with ice in her veins.  

Yep.  I think the dude just got one of the most gruesome deaths in a while.  Yuck.  

I think Alden’s faith in Maggie definitely took several hits.  I feel like he kind of had her on some sort of pedestal dating back to Hilltop times.  Father G, though?  The man is continuing to show himself a SAVAGE MFer.  

Josh gives Eugene such believable tics and mannerisms.  He IS Eugene.  

Thank you, Maggie, for lighting that flare.  I could not see a damn thing.  

What are these bad memories Negan alludes to?  Hmm?  Him being a shit husband to Lucille back when he was still taking her for granted?  

Father G on Gage’s Walker--”All that is, is a shell of a man, who died a coward.”  Kind of ironic considering Father G’s own origins, huh?  Has he any warmth in there for anybody but Rosita and Coco?  Does he equate it with weakness?  

“There are worse ways.”  And Maggie proceeds to paint us a horror story with mere words.  

Dark Maggie really surpasses anything certain fans have ever accused Carol of being.  Is she too far gone?  Who the hell knows?  I think it’s clear that she and Carol are both on a sliding scale of sorts when it comes to being able to compartmentalize shit to survive.  Personally?  I feel like Maggie might have leap-frogged Carol in this episode but it matters none because of the double standards so deeply entrenched in this fandom.  Both women have endured and had to do some horrific things.  It’s not a contest.  But it’s probably going to be turned into a season-long one.  

It’s almost like Kang was like, “Ya’ll bitches think Carol’s dark?  I’ll show you DARK.  Check and mate.”  

Whatever the reasoning, Maggie just got exponentially more interesting to me if not likable.  And before anybody out there comes at me, it’s entirely possible to be on a character’s side in some things and not be all up their ass in love with them, lol.  Like I’m attached to her because she’s family and Glenn loved her.  There’s a loyalty there and she absolutely is justified in her hatred of Negan.  But I’m not going to pretend her shit don’t stink like everybody else’s.  

Speaking of my baby Glenn.  What would he think of this version of Maggie?  I think he would be gutted and heart stricken that events led to her being like this but he’d understand because he’s pure like that.  Don’t mean he’d be A-OK with it all.  

Dog must be protected at all costs.  

Confession.  I know not the fuck who Pony Boy is, but I know him because all my fandom friends have pointed him out to me, lol.  RIP, Man.  I think you’re number’s up or close to it.  

Okay, though.  I admit it.  I am kinda LOVING Badass Father G.  

That scene in the subway car with all of them working to take all the Walkers out was already badass.  Then Daryl arrived and made it, in @freefromthecocoon’s words, HAWT.  LOL.  

Eugene staring at that little black book like it contains torture tools, hehehe.  

“Processed?  As in administratively?  Processed as in bologna or other meat stuffs?  This inquiring (enquiring?) mind needs to know.”  OMG, Eugene.  I admit it.  Even if it makes me look like a lunatic, LOL.  I straight up LMAO at that one.  I mean, ten years later and Terminus still fresh on the man’s mind.  

“You like feeling nervous?”  Well, no.  None of us that do, Mercer?  Do.  

Then he proceeds to make me howl with his “You can’t lie for shit” to Eugene.  

Josh McDermitt?  I love you, Man.  40 year old virgin, LOL.  

All this talk over the seasons of Daryl’s virginity and we have Eugene, hahaha.  But was he telling the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth?  

Finally.  Some daylight.  Where I can see.  

Eugene’s relief at seeing his friends safe and sound was such a beautiful thing to see.  I loved those hugs.  

Mercer’s face when he snarled “beat cop” in disdain to Ezekiel.  I think I’m gonna love this dude.  

“I went to West Point.  Asshole.”  Yeah.  I am.  

I know they probably catfishing Eugene right here because spoilers tell us that ain’t Stephanie.  But my heart still did a little d’aww.  Angela.  Don’t play with his poor heart like that.  

What’s got Daryl so pensive, huh?  Is it that the note reminds him of kids being lost or taken from their family? Or separated from their family?  Is he thinking of those Grimes babies and wondering if Michonne will ever make it back and why and how she was able to leave them behind?  Tell me it ain’t that Find Me nonsense.  

“This place sure has gone to shit since the last time I was here.”  LMAO, JDM.  I mean Negan.  Sorry.  Sorry.  I still hate Negan, but JDM has me entertained at least since they gave the asshole some shades of gray.  And speaking of shades of gray.  I’m loving the gray beard.  JDM’s looking GOOD (hear that NR?  Embrace the gray).  Negan can still kick rocks, lol.  

Anyway.  That scene was CREEPY AF.  Not even gonna lie.  

The Reapers strutting right on up to our group like it’s The Purge:  ZA.  

My bad, Pony Boy. Now RIP.  

Dark, dark episode with loads of tension broken up by some welcome humor by Princess.  The girl is fast becoming a fave of mine.  

My baby’s back next week!!!

I’m just going to plug my ears and pretend they’re trying to capture/recapture the horses because they’re pets.  Not because they’re starving so bad they feel the need to eat them.  La la la la la.  I can’t hear you.