#seriously Sigrid deserves better

[ramblinsims]

Casual Outfits for Apt Residents

I think I'm losing my mind, or its just internet search engines failing me, but I swore I'd seen a mod that forces apartment residents to wear their casual outfits, or block them from wearing their work outfits, and now I cannot find anything of the sort. The closest was the "Casual Dress for Work" type mods, but I don't know if that would do what I want it to do. And I don't generally mind my own sims wearing their work outfits. Cause as funny as it is to see my beautiful fashionista badass strutting around as the french fry mascot, it really just kills her vibe.

[mrs-elijah-wood]

HUGE SEASON 9 SPOILERS BELOW FOR MISSION 3 (thanks to @crownleys again for letting us use the awesome pic)

SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS

SERIOUSLY DO NOT CLICK IF YOU HAVEN’T LISTENED TO S9M3

YALLLLLLLL WHEN I TELL YOU I GOT TO THE BAKARI MESSAGE VAN ARK REVEAL AND LITERALLY SCREAMED AND PUNCHED THE AIR

CHECKMARK OFF THE BINGO CARD

I was kind of concerned Van Ark being alive was going to be gimmicky but it didn’t feel that way at all, and I am SO EXCITED!!!! Not bc I’m a van ark fan (I’m not) but bc we finally have a villain again with a personal interest in/a personal vendetta against Abel and Five specifically. Like Sage wasn’t really my jam, Jones was ehhhh, and while Shona was super interesting she did horrible things to the Abel squad as a byproduct of her own plans (and she got the most interesting to me after she decided to hit Abel hard by killing Tom and trying to kill Five)

But Van Ark??? Ohhhh Van Ark has an EXTREMELY vested interest in seeing bad things happen to the Abel crew. I am SO interested in how the stakes have been raised and what that means for everyone, ESPECIALLY Five, Peter, and Paula.

Also you KNOW when we finally come face to face with him again he’s going to say something smarmy and shitty about Sara and I will literally reach into the app and kill him with my bare hands if that happens

But here’s another question: what’s Bakari playing at? He was working with Sigrid, and according to his appearance in S4, he’d been working with Sigrid for a LONG time. Why is he so concerned about Van Ark now? I don’t trust Bakari at ALL. It might turn out to be a case of the enemy of my enemy is my friend but.......I don’t trust like that. (Also when Amelia was like “Janine, Bakari’s the closest thing you have to family” and Janine was like “no he’s not” my heart fucking grew three sizes and then exploded in my chest. Janine you deserve the WORLD 💕💕💕💕)

(Also aside: THIS IS THE PERFECT CHANCE FOR MOONCHILD TO COME BACK TOO. SHE PROBABLY HAS INSIGHTS. CYNTHIA. GIRL. I KNOW YOU’RE IN FIVE’S BRAIN PLEASE INTERACT)

And another thing that cracked me up was thinking about this new info paired with Sigrid’s epic villain meltdown in the S6 finale: ranting and raving about how “Ernest loved me!” Meanwhile he’s doing fuck all on Red Scorpion base like did y’all hear something? Anyway.

AND HOW MUCH DOES VAN ARK KNOW ABOUT EVERYTHING THAT’S HAPPENED SINCE S2??? I’m assuming he’ll know what’s been going on, but it would be really funny for Peter to have this like dramatic monologue and Van Ark’s just like “dude who the fuck are you”

AND WHO DO YALL THINK IS GOING ON THE TUNISIA TRIP??? Obviously Five, Janine, Peter, and Sam are going but I’m not sure who else is. We haven’t actually HEARD Jody or Maxine yet this season, so my money right now is on Paula, but Paula also went to the Hebrides so idk. Frances was in the “Next Week on Zombies Run” clip but I’m not sure if she’d go. And, tactics-wise, Janine might leave Jody in charge of Abel. But they’ll need a doctor- WAIT WHAT’S THIS IT’S KEFILWE LOBATSE WITH THE STEEL CHAIR. Wait hold on I said that as a joke but it would actually work perfectly. Kefi has combat experience.

I apologize that this has not been coherent but I’ve been screaming all day long. Also how fitting is it that I was LITERALLY on the Hello/Tightrope/Athena series of S2 missions of my current playthrough? Universe why do you have to play me like that

Very very promising start now just deliver on that Five angst (leave everyone else alone nobody better die) and I’ll be happy.

Third time’s the murder charm, Van Ark. How many times do we have to teach you this lesson, old man?????

[meteor752]

The insecurity of Tilda of Mirkwood

When I write about Tilda, I mostly write a pretty unstable but still happy person who just generally craves more in life, sort of like a Disney character.

(Honestly, short side note, every time I hear either How far I’ll go or Go the Distance I can’t help but imagine her just standing on the worst place possible singing the song, like a cliff or the top of a tree, before just jumping down and nearly breaking her neck)

But Tilda has a bit more to her than that, that I didn’t really get to touch in her deep dive, mostly because I couldn’t figure out how to put it in there.

When it comes to the insecurities of Matilda Lucia Dragondaughter, it’s mostly centered around the comparison to others around her, and how she sees herself.

There wasn’t much of it when she was a child, just like any other kid she was pretty carefree and didn’t really mind that sometimes people would talk weirdly about her and her antics.

It begun around the time her da married the elven king and she moved from Dale to Mirkwood, and when Legolas officially became her brother.

Now Legolas is messy and wild, sure, but he’s still a scholar, soldier, athlete, and generally very good looking for an elf, who’s also a prince and next in line for the throne.

Sigrid is a musician, a writer, a scholar, an axe wielder, a future queen, a black smith, and the perfect daughter.

Bain is a sweetheart, an excellent peace keeper, a good soldier despite his disability, the captain of the royal guard and the dream son in law.

Tilda is an emotionally unstable screwup that can’t sit still for one second, is petty as hell, had no sense of self care, has no goal in life, and is just a general nightmare to be around.

That’s at least how she sees herself.

Now while reading this you may think ‘Meteor this sounds more like self loathing than Insecurity, what are you talking about’.

Well, we’re only getting started, because Tilda lives a long life with a lot of shit in it.

When Tilda joined the elven army, she noticed how the trainer was harsher on her than on literally anyone else.

At first she thought it was because she was human and not an elf, until she figured out that they were trying to make her quit, which confused her of why.

That was until her training was done, but unlike basically every other recruit she was only called onto small scouting missions that were generally safe and lame, and she was like oh my family set this up okay.

So she quit immediately, and then the dark times begun.

Tilda was straight up miserable after leaving the army, and would mostly sit in her room and sulk for two reasons.

One, to join the army was her one chance of living up to the standards her siblings had put, by becoming a great soldier and maybe even captain one day, but she had never been given the chance.

Two, her family had tried to make her quit, and then made sure she was only put on the safest and meekest missions there was, which only proved that they didn’t trust or believe in her.

Tilda had always wanted her time in the spotlight, her big chance, her moment to truly shine so to speak. She’d always been in the shadow of her siblings, and the only way to get out of it was to create a scene which made her family angry at her.

See it as sort of a Luna from mlp mixed with Cassandra from Tangled.

And despite the self loathing, she did know that it was only in her head and that her family and friends probably didn’t think that way of her.

But when they refused to let her be a proper soldier, she then they refused to let her go anywhere without a consort, when they refused to let her show what she was capable of, it just proved that what she thought of herself was how they thought of her too.

A screwup.

A mistake.

A spare.

So yeah, she became really depressed, and refused to talk to anyone except Aloe.

She spent a lot of time in Rivendell just to be away from her family, moping in the room she was given and barely ever coming out.

She started to put burn marks on her arms and hands, she started to jump from a bit too high heights, she started to “accidentally” cut herself sometimes.

She just wanted to feel something that wasn’t misery.

Her family tried to cheer her up, but they genuinely didn’t know what was happening since she wasn’t exactly the person to be open about her insecurities and issues, so all their efforts were in vain.

It was Aragorn, out of all people, who got her out of her hole of despair.

Legolas had sent a message to him after a few years of Tilda’s bad habits of barely eating, barely sleeping, and barely talking to anyone else.

Aragorn basically nearly kicked the door in, which nearly scared Tilda to death, before hugging her firmly and demanding that she will follow him on a hunt.

And because of the fact that Tilda respects Aragorn quite a bit, she just nods shortly.

To her surprise, Aragorn doesn’t try to make her talk of what’s going on like literally anyone else, but simply talks about other stuff that is going on in both of their lives.

Tilda ends up having a bit of a wake up call, realizing that she’d been moping for the last eight years, and just decided to get off her ass and do something with her life.

Legolas was quite surprised when Tilda just turned up one day in Mirkwood like if nothing had happened demanding that he’d go kill some spiders with her.

Despite the fact that she’d stopped sulking, she still didn’t make an attempt to better her well being and kept her negative thoughts to herself.

She simply didn’t want to be seen as weak and fragile, like so many thought of her because of her human biology and her constant inability to stay still for one second.

If her family would find out that she also thought of herself as weird and useless, then they would just pity her.

And Tilda honestly thought she was strong enough to handle it.

She was certainly not.

Every time Legolas had to leave for something, every time there was some diplomatic journey ahead, every time the elves were called into battle, she was left behind. She’d always wanted her moment of glory as I’ve previously mentioned, but how could that be given if she never even got the chance?

She just felt like she was in the way for everyone.

After she left her family behind, (Or more exactly literally escaped out the window), she felt free and happy for basically the first time in her life. It was just her and Aloe against the world, with no expectations, no one to feel like she let down, no judgment, just her and her best friend.

And it remained like that for a while, as she didn’t meet many people she didn’t need to compare herself to others.

It was first when she received the invitation to the wedding of Aragorn and Legolas that she was put back on earth again and reality hit her.

Especially when both Sigrid and Bain tried to convince her to come back to society, just so she wouldn’t hurt herself, because which angered her greatly.

She left the wedding early, angry tears in her eyes without turning back.

Which was the reason she took on a dragon and became a dragonslayer. To prove that she wasn’t a doll that would topple over any minute. To prove that she was just as capable and great as her siblings. To prove that she wasn’t just the younger sibling.

And if you’ve read the deep dive, you know how that turned out.

***

I love Tilda, she’s literallyy favorite Lotr character, which is why I write so much about her. But sometimes I just like to make characters suffer through trauma and insecurities.

This is heavily inspired by me listening to Waiting In The Wings and The Moon Rises for like 24/7 for the last few days, which are both awesome songs go listen to it.

Tilda’s way of coping with how she felt is really bad, (like seriously kids talk to someone take your meds) but from what I’ve written about her I knew she wouldn’t be the one to confront her more weak looking emotions. She was raised by elves, she’s prideful by nature.

The way Tilda feels is not that she’s not worthy of what she has, but more that she deserves more than what she has, which has to do again with the youngest sibling thing.

But honestly with the right power and proper snap, she probably could be like an mlp villain.

AU Masterpost

[manuscripts-dontburn]

The Book of Dust: The Secret Commonwealth

Author: Philip Pullman

First published: 2019

Pages: 687

Rating: ★★★☆☆

How long did it take: 11 days

Review HERE.

Kam s ním?

Author: Jan Neruda

First published: 1917

Pages: 29

Rating: ★★★★★

How long did it take: 1 day

Znáte přeci ten starý vtip, ne? Jan Neruda miloval Karolinu Světlou. A když zemřela, tak napsal "Kam s ním". :D V každém případě tento ikonický text i po více než sto letech vyloudí na tváři čtenáře upřímný úsměv, pobaví a zároveň dýchne romantickou atmosférou staré Prahy.

The Tattooist of Auschwitz

Author: Heather Morris

First published: 2018

Pages: 320

Rating: ★★☆☆☆

How long did it take: 7 days

As much as I appreciate learning about Lali (not Lale!) Sokolov and his story, this book from literary point of view is deeply average. The sparse and straightforward style of narration can be effective (case in point: Exit West by Mohsin Hamid), but for some reason here is only does the book a disservice by making the people in the book cut-outs without much differences in personality, and subsequently the reader (at least this particular reader) fails to engage with them on a more personal level. Add to it the historical inaccuracies and what you are left with is something very unremarkable.

Dreadnought: Britain, Germany and the Coming of the Great War

Author: Robert K. Massie

First published: 1992

Pages: 1007

Rating: ★★★☆☆

How long did it take: 40 days

I am not going to pretend that I read each page of this book, some (about 1/4) I skimmed. This is a great achievement of a research for the writer, but so very dense and detailed that the retention level is not high. I definitely feel like I learned a lot, but I also feel a lot has escaped me. Very interesting, very well written, my brain is toast.

Kristin Lavransdatter: The Wreath

Author: Sigrid Undset

First published: 1920

Pages: 278

Rating: ★★★★★

How long did it take: 3 days

This is, actually, a very simply laid-out story. A beautiful young girl comes of age, falls in love and defies her family wishes to get the man she wants. And the book is very straight-forward with it as well, not adding anything unneccessary, no deep philosophy, no side-tracks to boast its volume. But the core of the book are relationships between flawed characters, be that Kristin, naive and stubborn, or Simon, kind but also condescending, Aashild, helpful but not above scheming, and of course Erlend, impulsive, selfish and overall a bastard. The life in medieval Norway was tough, honest, difficult, lacing Christianity with superstition and all this Sigrid Undset captured beautifully. What truly elevated this volume to 5 stars for me, however, was the ending scene between Kristin´s parents.

No One Is Too Small To Make a Difference

Author: Greta Thunberg

First published: 2019

Pages: 68

Rating: ★★★☆☆

How long did it take: 1 day

First of all, I think many people angry with Greta just don´t get what she is and what she does. They criticize her for being harsh and undiplomatic, and they criticize her for speaking up without offering a sollution of her own. And it would be funny if it was not so horrible. What I got to understand from this book is that Greta asks the world to LISTEN to the people who DO have sollutions, or at least strive to find them. She is the voice that is supposed to attract attention to a problem and she is pleading, begging and demanding (as well we all should!) that we actually start treating that problem with the seriousness it deserves. That said this little book is hardly a comprehensive statement and I believe Greta and her mission deserve a better representation. By this I mean: instead of merely printing her speeches, why not edit them in a ways so that many points are not repeated in all of them? I GET the point of this publication, but at the same time the potential was not reached

The Familiars

Author: Stacy Halls

First published: 2019

Pages: 360

Rating:  ★★★☆☆

How long did it take: 3 days

Yeah..... this was fine. I liked it. Not much to discuss. If you wanna read it, go ahead, there is nothing wrong with it.

Glass Town

Author: Isabel Greenberg

First published: 2020

Pages: 224

Rating: ★★★★★

How long did it take: 1 day

I just... really love Charlotte Brontë, you know. And this book is really both imagined, but for greater part factual, journey into her own private torment. I have, also, always found her the most tragic of all the Brontë siblings, especially because of she outlived all of her siblings, and then her own pregnancy killed her. As for the publication itself, I have to say I am not a great admirer of Isabel Greenberg´s art style, especially her close-ups freak me out (though the more complex pictures were nice). However she has managed to tell the story of the Brontës in a very creative and original way, by using beautiful language and packing a punch right through my soul.

The Tales of Beedle the Bard

Author: J.K. Rowling

First published: 2008

Pages: - (audio book)

Rating: ★★★☆☆

How long did it take: 2 hours

This was, for most part, really enjoyable and makes a nice addition to the Harry Potter books.

Madame Bovary

Author: Gustave Flaubert

First published: 1856

Pages: 311

Rating: ★★★★☆

How long did it take: 9 days

1. Beautiful writing. 2. I hated everyone.

A Gentleman in Moscow

Author: Amor Towles

First published: 2016

Pages: 472

Rating: ★★★★☆

How long did it take: 5 days

I liked the gentle flow of events, I liked the atmosphere and the people I met in this book. I thought the premise was interesting and clever, and all in all the author did deliver a lot of what was promised. The only thing I missed, and I cannot tell you the specific reason if I tried, was a strong emotional connection, something that would stun me, perhaps some long lasting story elements which would ties everything together. Life of the gentleman in this book moved from episode to episode, from character to character, but there was not that one underlining goal which would have made it all so much powerful.

[zitrolena]

I’m happy you’re doing better... you deserve to feel amazing cause you seem like a nice person. I’m doing good, started rewatching Escape The Night, so that’s fun. If it’s not too much to ask, can you recommend me some music to listen to. I’m going on a long drive soon and would love some new music. I hope you have a marvellous day!

Aww that's so sweet of you, you seem really nice as well!!😊

And yeah sure I can! I love recommending music eventhough I'm excited to find out if it's also your type of music... Btw some of them are not that happy so tell me what kind of music you want to listen to and I'll recommend you songs that are more fitting :)

So first of all I had a happy breakdown a couple minutes ago because I started listening to Sasha Sloan again and I'M IN LOVE WITH HER MUSIC so I'll definitely recommend her. I love every song of her but especially Normal, Ready yet, Thoughts, Older, Faking it, The Only and Runaway because they sometimes describe my feelings better than I do.

Other artists & songs would be

Jeremy Zucker!!!! My bae next to Sasha Sloan.. I'd definitely recommend comethru but I seriously love almost every song and especially the new album with Chelsea Cutler (I listen to it on repeat)

Joji..He has many really good songs so I'd just check him out (I'm especially in love with attention and slow dancing in the dark)

Summer time high time - Cuco

Connection - One Republic

If you want love - NF

Sigrid... I love her but her music is not everyone's still I'd really recommend trying it

Not another song about love - Hollywood Ending

Old town road (remix) - Lil Nas X

I am going home - Roseaux (probably my favourite song atm)

I don't belong in this club - why don't we

King of everything - Dominic Fine (Also my favourite)

Just the same - Bruno Major (for crying, so probably not that great while driving)

Entertain us - Benny Cassette

I'd love to hear from you again and you can also write me privately if you want to, but don't feel pressured to! I'd just really love to hear if you liked my recommendations :)

Have fun on your drive and I wish you an amazing day🙈

[taste-in-music]

My Favorite EPs of 2018

For all the larger releases and albums dropped in 2018, I also think it’s important to focus on smaller projects, many of them debut efforts, from lesser known artists. I’m limiting myself to two top tracks per album so I don’t end up just saying every song. So I present to you, (in no particular order,) my favorite EPs of 2018. Enjoy!

Make My Bed by King Princess: King Princess is the quirky queer pop star that I’ve needed in my life for a while. Not only are her songs the best mix of laid back and melodic, but her music videos are also great, (just to reiterate, I freaking ADORE artists who give a crap about their visuals.) This EP is short, but wastes no time getting to the bops. It’s also been great seeing her gain traction in the pop scene and start to get the recognition she deserves. (She’s going to be playing in my city but I can’t go, so guess who’s salty...)

My Top Tracks: Holy, 1950

Ungodly by BAUM: I first came across BAUM’s music when she opened for Dagny, and I was interested immediately. (She was great live BTW.) Her deeper voice suits her powerful pop anthems wonderfully, and she’s got the charisma and the songwriting skills to stand out from the rest of the pop scene. I hope to hear more from her in the future.

My Top Tracks: Hot Water, This Body

Raw by Sigrid: Sigrid, the unsung sunshine goddess of Scandinavian pop music. How is every song she releases perfect? I love everything about her, from her get-stuck-in-your-head-in-the-best-way hooks to her first-raspy-then-clear-as-an-angel voice to her style, (seriously, all her outfits are adorable,) to her beautiful hair, to her smile... I’m convinced she’s an actual ray of sunshine. You keep doing you, Sigrid, it’s working.

My Top Tracks: High Five, Schedules

Burn Slow by Jaira Burns: I first came across Jaira Burns when YouTube recommended me her music video for Ugly. That song was solid, so I went looking for her other music and found some of her more recently released singles. I didn’t know she was going to drop an EP, and finding it in my Spotify release radar was a whole treat. Her brand of pop is upbeat and totally bopping, complete with sparkly production, playful lyrics, and sassy vocals. 

My Top Tracks: OKOKOK, This Time Around

Medusa by Kailee Morgue: This EP is witchy as fuck, and it always gets me in that spooky sexy chaotic enchantress mood. Kailee Morgue filled the slot in my music rotation that used to belong to Melanie Martinez, balancing creepy atmosphere with super sweet vocals. I’ve had the title track of this EP on repeat throughout the whole year, as well as her other singles. I hope to see an album from her in the future. 

My Top Tracks: Medusa, Unfortunate Soul

Sunset Season by Conan Gray: Much like the title suggests, this EP is drenched in golden-hour glory, rich with complex vocal layering and ethereal instrumentals. From the catchy hook on Crush Culture to softer tunes like Lookalike, this EP gives me major Blue Neighbourhood vibes while also carving out it’s own unique identity. I can’t recommend this enough.

My Top Tracks: Crush Culture, Greek God

Bad Habit by Your Smith: This EP is super short, but super sweet, too. The music is as sunny and bright as a warm summer day. Spotify recommended me the track “The Spot,” and I was instantly hooked on Your Smith’s subtle vocals and smooth production. The title track and deeper cuts on this EP are just as good, catchy and top-tap inducing, (especially the song Debbie. What a BOP) 

My Top Tracks: The Spot, Debbie

chapter 1 by girl in red: Chill and laid back with a low-fi, homemade sound, 19 year old Norwegian singer/songwriter girl in red may not be as well known as other entries on this list, but certainly deserves more recognition. This entire EP is wlw bops, and she produced everything herself! Think Clairo’s sound meeting Hayley Kiyoko’s lyrics. (Her we fell in love in october/forget her single is also great, so check that out too.)

My Top Tracks: girls, say anything

diary 001 by Clairo: Apparently liking Clairo makes me a basic local and she’s allegedly an industry plant or whatever, but that doesn’t detract from my enjoyment of her music. Her relaxed vocals and simple production are totally likable and help me unwind after a long day. I’m not always into the whole whispery low-fi thing, but she does it well.

My Top Tracks: 4EVER, Pretty Girl

Spring EP by Wallows: An indie rock/pop band with easygoing vocals, bright instrumentals, and an all around nostalgic feel? Sign me the heck up. I first heard of this band because Dylan Minnette is in it, but that’s not why I decided to seek them out. I decided to after hearing Pictures of Girls on the radio and getting a recommendation in my ask, (thanks to @ delightful-unicorn.) I always love getting recommendations, so y’all send me some more!

My Top Tracks: Ground, Pictures of Girls

As She Pleases by Madison Beer: My sister got me into Madison Beer, specifically with the tracks Dead and Say It To My Face. While this EP can feel overproduced at times, it’s stuffed with catchy and danceable pop tracks, as well as some softer moments. I had the opportunity to see Madison Beer live, and it was a ton of fun, (she sounded pretty good. She’s got mad pipes, and I feel like she’ll only get better at controlling them with time.) Her newest single Hurts Like Hell slaps and she’s got a debut album in the works. Heck to the yeah!

My Top Tracks: Fools, Teenager In Love

Young by Charlotte Lawrence: If you’re into the whole Bea Miller/Olivia O’Brien/Maggie Lindemann kind of pop scene, I’d definitely say that you should check out Charlotte Lawrence. You know what? Check her out even if you aren’t into those artists. After hearing Seventeen, (which might be one of my favorite songs EVER, what a banger,) I was hyped for this EP and wasn’t disappointed. She’s got party jams and slower songs, all which showcase her lovely voice.

My Top Tracks: Sleep Talking, I Bet

Nina Cried Power by Hozier: We can say that, despite all the shit that’s happened this year, that at least Hozier emerged from his mossy hovel in the fae realm to bless us with new music. I’ve always found Hozier interesting, but I wasn’t always a giant fan of his. I think my experience with his music was like when I first heard Royals by Lorde on the radio: I knew it was something unique and different from everything else, wasn’t sure if I liked it, and then grew to appreciate it. This EP has got some power and bombast to it, but also showcases Hozier’s softer side. And he’s got an album on the way! Color me excited. 

My Top Tracks: Nina Cried Power ft. Mavis Staples, Shrike

Read my top albums of 2018 list.

So that’s that on that. What were your favorite EPs of 2018? Any newer artists you think everyone should know about? Leave your recommendations and thoughts down below. 

[riverheadbooks]

READER HOROSCOPES FOR MARCH 2018 Plotting your destiny with matriarchal literati 

PISCES

Welcome to March, my friend! It’s your birthday and you can cry if you want to, laugh if you want to, or curl up in an invisible corner with your journal -- you get it! But seriously, we can’t recommend a better way to usher in a new year than taking some time to reflect on where you’ve been, and where you’re hoping to go. Life comes at you fast, and this month will be no exception: things are changing quickly and there are a lot of factors outside of your control--but not all! What are some goals and milestones you set for yourself that, in hindsight, weren’t all that realistic? Use the wisdom and experiences you’ve gained since then to reset those expectations and adjust your methods to make your new goals more attainable. For a touching reminder of just how fickle and unpredictable life can be, your lucky book this month is a novel that explores the reality of loss and the joy of finding love and companionship anew. If you’re a dog lover, you’re really going to enjoy this one.

LUCKY BOOK: The Friend by Sigrid Nunez

ARIES

This month has all sorts of interesting things in store for you, Aries. If that sounded vaguely ominous, well, we’re not taking it back. You know that old British motivational phrase (now defunct internet meme) that starts with “keep calm”? Yes. That one. That is your objective for the month. While ‘calm’ is not your typical or preferred setting, practicing a bit of serenity will come in handy when the plans you think you’re headed toward at 100 MPH go sideways. Rather than continuing to barrel toward them, try slowing down, and envisioning what else might be accomplished. Some doors just don’t stay open forever, unfortunately. But having an open mind in the face of unexpected challenges will take you far! If the disappointment of your temporarily thwarted plans is really getting to you, call a life time-out (that’s a thing) and disappear into your lucky book this month: a fascinating peek back to the ‘20s and 30’s and intersecting destinies of two women who had no idea what their futures held. The promise of a new day and all of the freedoms that accompany it can quickly overcome your previously held negative assumptions...but only if you let it. Go on, give it a try.

LUCKY BOOK: The Chaperone by Laura Moriarty

TAURUS

Congratulations to you, Taurus, for making it through February! Shortest month it may very well be, there were a few points that felt completely interminable, so we salute you. And good news: March is going to be much kinder. So relax: unclench, shed that tough exterior, let some of the light in! This month will reinvigorate your appreciation for art--either through new creations that you dream up, or by getting lost in someone else’s. Try to let out the child living inside you, as it will only widely expand your imagination and capacity for love and play. Yes, you’re an adult, you pay bills, you have boring responsibilities, but you’re also a person living in a world that has new wonders to offer every day, if you just let yourself look. It’s possible to use the insight and wisdom you gain every day from living your very grown up life to inform the art you make or take in--rather than letting it burden or exhaust you. Even negative experiences can be someone neutralized through a unique or humorous lens. Fortunately, the author of your lucky book this month is something of a master when it comes to this. This memoir takes you through the life of a girl whose father is a married Catholic priest, and all of the misadventures--hilarious, raunchy, heartbreaking--that comprised her unusual childhood. Past hurts and trauma can make way for a more enlightened (and brighter!) future, so shine on!

LUCKY BOOK: Priestdaddy by Patricia Lockwood

GEMINI

Welcome to March, Gemini! You’re quite the busy bee this month; does your calendar have any open nights left? No worries, we’re just teasing you. Sometimes you’re on, sometimes you’re not so on, but this month is your time! Enjoy meeting new people and charming the pants off of them; many of these relationships you establish now will prove mutually beneficial in the immediate future and further down the line. Of course, this doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be discerning. After every date, outing, or social event, do a solo recap of everyone you meet, ideas that were proposed, new ventures you’re considering. What are the pros, what are the cons? Think carefully and weigh all of your options; no one is expecting answers tomorrow, as you shouldn’t be, either! Maintaining a clear viewpoint and cool head will be essential this month, as there’s some family drama brewing (isn’t there always?). There’s no need for things to turn ugly as long you keep those lines of communication open, which unfortunately, is often much easier than it sounds. Remain cognizant of old wounds--sometimes, they go back for many years. No one knows that better than the family in your lucky book this month, whose young daughter goes missing, the manifestation of a generational curse. When her older sister sets out to find her, she uncovers a host of secrets that change their lives forever. Trauma has a way of uniting family, but healing together will bring you even closer. Don’t be afraid to reach out to the ones who know you the best.

LUCKY BOOK: Forgotten Country by Catherine Chung

CANCER

Hey, Cancer. You’ve been working through some stuff lately, and it hasn’t felt very good. There come times when we have to pause what we’re doing, look around, and wonder why and how we got there. That’s kind of where you are right now: realizing that you’ve been going through the motions, not 100% into the roles you’ve been expected to play for some time now. If you’re questioning your place and second-guessing your enthusiasm, it’s okay! You’re not an automaton; people’s wants and needs change all the time. Pay attention to how you’re feeling as you navigate through the day: what’s wrong? What’s missing? Chances are, your dissatisfaction is showing in the parts of your life you see fit to share with others. Your group chats, your tweets, your Facebook statuses. Communicating your unhappiness is healthy, but be careful of where do you it. But more importantly, be prepared: what you’re putting out into the universe may come back to you sooner that you expect. When you gain freedom from the thing you feel is holding you back, what will you do next? The main character in your lucky book this month experiences much of the same anxieties and doubts that you’re facing this month, so dive in and take whatever wisdom you can from her intense emotional excavations. You’ll both come out the other side a bit spent, probably, but ultimately exactly where you’re supposed to be.

LUCKY BOOK: A Separation by Katie Kitamura

LEO

Listen to your heart, Leo! This month, let your compassion be your guide. What causes are you feeling called to? What news cycles have you followed diligently? What are the charities you consistently donate to? Take those passions and run with them: turn your care into tangible projects! Can you begin a fundraiser? Sponsor a trip? Hold a letter-writing marathon? It’s good to be concerned about things that are happening in the world, but what’s better is to figure out meaningful ways to put that concern to work in ways that feel feasible to you. But be aware: in taking on these projects, you’re going to be showing a side of yourself that others may not yet be privy to. This is how creativity works: when you envision a product that will go out into the world, you’re necessarily giving a piece of yourself that reveals what’s important to you. Scary, but worth it, wouldn’t you say? In your lucky book this month, you’ll encounter a young woman who is on the brink of freedom, but experiences a true crisis of choice when her siblings back home require much more from her than she feels equipped to give. And when a young man from a powerful political family enters the picture, the stakes are suddenly much higher. When is sacrifice worth the possibility of love? Let this book keep your fire burning as you set out to make the world a better place this month, Leo. You’ve got this.

LUCKY BOOK: Home Fire by Kamila Shamsie

VIRGO

Well hello there, Virgo! Your energy levels are off the charts this month, and it’s contagious! When you’re feeling determined, there’s precious little that can get in your way, and it’s beyond exciting when you feel like you’re getting closer and closer to achieving your goals. Continue to be strategic in how you move--in your relationships, at the office, with your friends--and be sure that you’re not allowing your drive to completely take over. There will come times when you feel certain that people that you’re doing business with just aren’t at your level, and subtly persuading them to do what you want is the best course of action. While we’re all for playing to your strengths (and sometimes, saving someone from themselves is the kindest thing to do!) be mindful of when you’re playing into this: are you genuinely trying to find a solution that works for all, or simply focusing on number one? Tunnel vision may feel enlightening at first, like you’re working toward a singular purpose, but in reality, it’s blinding. You have the power to be the sort of person you’d like to work with. During your well-deserved breaks, pop into the world of a young museum curator, who quickly finds herself completely of her depth. Two years after the tragic death of the last curator, she finds that the secrets and lies of the past live on in the museum and its staff, and she struggles to bear the weight of her new role within the mounting tension. You may not be an Alena--or the hapless new curator--this month, but sinking into a tale about a dysfunctional workplace can shed some powerful perspective on your role as peacekeeper where you work. When new tensions arise and lines are drawn in the sand, how will you respond?

LUCKY BOOK: Alena by Rachel Pastan

LIBRA 

Libra, sit down, take a load off. You’ve been carrying a lot lately, and it may be time to look through some of the baggage you’re carrying, as it isn’t even all yours! Being a support system for loved ones is a beautiful gift, but within reason. How much of yourself are you giving, and how much time are you taking for yourself? What are your needs? Are they being fulfilled? It can be hard to feel good about withdrawing that helping hand when the people you love are depending on you, but if you’re empty, you’re not able to fill anybody else up. Slow down and acknowledge that you are just a human being, and you need to recharge just like anybody else. There are real consequences to running yourself ragged; you will not win any trophies for being the most tired, despite what you may think. Make a vow to yourself, or to another friend who you can rely on, that you will use this month to slow down and give yourself a breather. Find less labor-intensive ways to help, if you need to, or sub out for alternate systems of support that can help shoulder the load. Lose yourself in a book that is guaranteed to replenish you: witty, frank, and gorgeous meditations on how the victories in life, no matter how large or how small, change us for good, and for the better. You do so much, and give so much--know that the positive energy you’re putting into the world is making a real difference. Yes, you!

LUCKY BOOK: Small Victories by Anne Lamott

SCORPIO

Change is hard, Scorpio. It’s unsettling, and sometimes downright scary. But it can also be a blessing. Consider this your warning: opportunities are coming this month that may uproot some significant aspects of your life. This is good thing, though--with change, comes growth! But use any anxiety you may experience at the prospect of this change to examine what’s going on internally. Are there places in your life where you know that you’re getting in your own way? Are you trapped in a cycle of bad communication in a relationship? Are you holding yourself back at work because you’re afraid of taking on additional responsibility? Is there a goal you’ve been putting off for months or even years because you’ve convinced yourself you’ll never reach it? Now is the time to end the negative self-talk and take a chance on yourself. Stop feeding the impulse to limit yourself; it’s a self-fulfilling prophecy! Keep your eyes open; don’t let yourself be caught off guard by the new opportunities coming your way. If you stay ready, there’s no need to get ready. Your lucky book this month is just what you need to keep you on your toes, Scorpio. Sometimes a bit of fear is a good thing....and this novel of power, desperation, and broken souls is absolutely designed to unsettle you just enough to keep you paying attention. Get swept away in a Fever Dream, and then wake up to the reality of a new day on the horizon. Good luck!

LUCKY BOOK: Fever Dream by Samanta Schweblin

SAGITTARIUS

It’s oh so quiet, Sagittarius. And thank goodness--life has just been rather loud lately, hasn’t it? March will be your month to spend more time alone, someplace peaceful, and just reflect on life. You’ll likely experience a burst of creativity--follow where that leads you, by all means. That story you abandoned months or even years ago: don’t be surprised if you finally find your ending. The face that’s been in your dreams: it may be time to rent a studio somewhere and get back into painting. However your creative energies want to make themselves known, let them. This intense introspection and processing of emotion is healthy, and it’ll feel amazing, too. Of course, this doesn’t mean you should shut yourself away from the world completely. Taking it to that extreme may result in an actual depression, so accept company when you feel up to it, and give your parents a call, too. They’d love to hear from you. Your lucky book this month is a collection of vignettes by a character who is rather like you this month. Charming, quirky, interrogative of herself, her surroundings, the random pleasures and annoyances of daily existence. Take these in bit by bit, or all in one sitting, however you feel is best. It’s your world, Sag. Sit back and enjoy it!

LUCKY BOOK: Pond by Claire-Louise Bennett

CAPRICORN

March is a tricky month, so watch out. You’re feeling pressured to perform--whether at work, at your side hustle, or both--and it’s more than a bit stressful. How this usually manifests in you is your need for competition: how are the others in your field doing? Is there someone you perceive as on your level, and are you alarmed that they may be ‘winning’? When these sorts of thoughts pop up, try to identify them for what they are (unnecessary! unhealthy!) and keep it moving. Giving in will only result in your needing to prove yourself in ways that maybe, in the short term, get you what you want, but you’ll be leaving some pretty annoyed and hurt friends in your wake. No one likes a sore winner, Cap. Think about where this pressure may be coming from--is it anxiety, insecurity, a distraction from a larger issue? You have the final say over your actions, no matter how strong your impulses may be. Second-guess your immediate responses when you feel yourself going to that place. And maybe take a few more naps! Being overly tired always makes you extra snappy. For even more R&R, your lucky book this month is a story collection perfect for transporting you away. Filled with tales that explore love, childhood, parenthood with a light touch of the fantastical, you’ll have no trouble coming back to center when everything just feels like too much. You can do this, Cap. Just remember to breathe.

LUCKY BOOK: Awayland by Ramona Ausubel

AQUARIUS

Whoa, there Aquarius! You’re go go go all March with barely any time to slow down. But is that actually true? With so many crossed signals (quick question: just how many times have dinner/happy hour/brunch plans been thwarted by time or venue mixups?) you’ve got to find a spare minute to catch your breath. Move with purpose, not just speed. This goes for all areas, but particularly in your career. Where are you going, and what is your strategy for getting there? This path that you’re on right now, are you positive this is the best one? If it’s not, get off of it! You won’t lose any time by making sure you’re in exactly the right place; you’re actually saving it. Never hesitate to redirect your steps when you realize that it’s time. And don’t be too proud to admit when you were the one who entered the wrong address in Google Maps (it happens!). For a riveting tale of mystery, thrills and reversals, look no further than your lucky book this month. An orphan is raised to assist in a daring, seductive heist, but when she comes to care for the mark in unexpected ways, plans go awry and true loyalties are revealed. When you need refuge from the breakneck pace of your daily schedule, this book will be your perfect armchair companion. Inhale, exhale. Then dive in.

LUCKY BOOK: Fingersmith by Sarah Waters

[deadcactuswalking]

REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 28th January 2018

This week was very, very busy so I’m going to get straight to the point here and look at our top ten, which has changed quite a bit to say the least.

Top 10

I suppose we won’t be having Eminem topping the chart for much longer, not even with Ed Sheeran’s help, as Drake’s most recent snoozefest has, in the first time in Reviewing the Charts history, debuted at number-one. All I have to say about this is... really? I’d rather have Lil Pump top the charts, at least he’s relatively interesting.

“Barking” by Ramz stays at number-two in the runner-up position as I just keep on losing interest in this dude.

At number-three, we have last week’s chart-topping “River” by Eminem featuring Ed Sheeran, and I’m not bothered, really, it’s okay, not amazing.

“IDGAF” by Dua Lipa is up by 10 spots all the way to number-four, and that’s just all for the best, this song is amazing.

“Tip Toe” by Jason Derulo featuring French Montana has made the top five, because the UK charts love me today, and decided this should go up three spaces.

The new arrivals are really messing up whatever traction Cardi B’s remix of “Finesse” by Bruno Mars ever had, now it’s down to number-six, but I do hope it makes a rebound soon.

“Perfect” by Ed Sheeran – now just Ed, without Beyoncé for some reason – is down four spots to number-seven, which means the UK is taking baby steps towards no longer caring about Ed Sheeran. Thank God.

We have another new entry into the top ten, with “This is Me” by Keala Settle and The Greatest Showman Ensemble up five spots to number-eight.

Our final new entry into the top ten is “Breathe” by Jax Jones featuring Ina Wroldsen three spaces up to nine.

To finish off our top ten, once again, is the non-mover “I Know You” by Craig David and Bastille.

Climbers

Other than the top ten having some major change-ups, we also have quite a few climbers and fallers, with the biggest climber being “Strangers” by Sigrid going up a massive 12 spaces to #14. “Feel it Still” by Portugal. The Man also hits the top 20 incredibly late, going up five spaces to #20 – seriously, why now? Is this all because of that advert? Not that I’m upset, this is a great track. “Him & I” by G-Eazy and Halsey also went up five spaces to #27, but if you care about that song at all, I don’t know what to say to you.

Other minor climbers include “Bad” by Steel Banglez featuring Yungen, MoStack, Mr. Eazi and Not3s up to #30 and “Bouff Daddy” by J Hus up to #26.

Fallers

Jesus. The amount of fallers this week is unbelievable, but not many of them are very large. The top twenty contains most of the major drops, with “I Miss You” by Clean Bandit and Julia Michaels dropping seven spaces, “Anywhere” by Rita Ora dropping six spaces, “Let You Down” by NF dropping four spaces, “Never be the Same” by Camila Cabello dropping eight spaces, “17” by MK dropping five spaces and "Decline" by RAYE and Mr. Eazi down three spaces to #11, #12, #13, #15, #16 and #18 respectively. "Havana" by Camila Cabello featuring Young Thug is also down six spaces to #22, unfortunately, as is "Naked" by James Arthur, fortunately. "For You (Fifty Shades Freed)" is proving itself as a flop, with the Liam Payne and Rita Ora debut dropping eight spaces to #29. Justin Timberlake jumped down a 10-spot bridge down to #38 with "Filthy" with me as the cackling overseer.

Other minor falls include "No Words" by Dave featuring MoStack down to #24, "Wolves" by Selena Gomez and Marshmello down to #25, "rockstar" by Post Malone featuring 21 Savage down to #31, "New Rules" by Dua Lipa down to #34, "Dimelo" by Rak-Su featuring Naughty Boy and Wyclef Jean down to #35, "Let Me Down" by Jorja Smith featuring Stormzy down to #36, "All the Stars" by Kendrick Lamar and SZA down to #37 and "Silence" by Marshmello featuring Khalid down to #39.

​Dropouts

Maybe my theory is correct. The UK is getting tired of Ed Sheeran, and it's a damn good sight to see "Shape of You" finally drop out the top 40 from #39. Sure, it's still in the top 100, but who cares about the other 60 songs? Let's be fair here. "Man's Not Hot" by Big Shaq finally realises its status as a meme deep into the grave, and drops out from #18 to my glee. Stormzy and MNEK also drop out with "Blinded by Your Grace, Pt. 2" from #37, as does "My My My!" by Troye Sivan from #38 after its first week (​flop alert​). We haven't talked about the new arrivals yet, but I'm sure this is gonna be a good week looking at these dropouts, fallers and climbers. 

​​NEW ARRIVALS

​Let's see if this really is a good week by looking at our new arrivals. 

​#40 - "Sick Boy" - The Chainsmokers

Andrew Taggart can’t sing but he does his best here, I suppose, with his slightly nasal multi-tracked vocals over the oddly dark pop ballad, with simple piano melodies played over drums that are not trap snares or rattling hi-hats or steel pans, a first for Reviewing the Charts – yes, seriously. The synths in the bridge are pretty intense as well, making this a pretty powerful alternative rock song, which I can call an ironic anthem for sick boys, I suppose. They say that he’s the sick boy, and his singing voice proves their point massively. It’s not a bad song though, with a better vocalist and maybe, you know, not being completely all over the place in terms of structure, this could have easily been best of the week. We need more upbeat rock in the top 40, even if, yes, it is from the Chainsmokers.

​#33 - "These Days" - Rudimental featuring Jess Glynne, Macklemore and Dan Caplen

Four artists, all of which are hit-and-miss (excluding the complete nobody Dan Caplen), collaborate for something that’s completely out of all their leagues: a largely acoustic yet also largely electronic pop nostalgia ballad, with gospel choir vocals assisting Jess Glynne on the chorus and Dan Caplen channelling his inner Ed Sheeran. It’s actually pretty excellent for a generic pop song, in fact, I’d call it perfect. The vocaloid drop sounds so much like an electric guitar that I can pass it off as a guitar solo, and there’s some creative manipulation of the vocals here to create trumpet-like blares in the post-chorus. Macklemore’s slightly autotuned rap verse isn’t bad, but he doesn’t make much of an impression, especially at the end of his section where he’s overwhelmed by both Caplen and Glynne’s vocals as well as the elegant synths and (real) trumpets. This is essentially a representation of British popular music in 2017, but made so much more natural. Check this out, even if the Bon Jovi song of the same title is much better, just saying.

​#32 - "Fine Line" - Mabel featuring Not3s

We’ve had pop and rock so it’s about time for some boring reggae-rap, right? Nope! Mabel switches things up with a dancehall-influenced tropical R&B jam with a twinkly synth lead and cluttered percussion that could have been cleaned up to match the smoothness of the production and Mabel’s vocals, which make her sound better than she ever has, seriously, she sounds amazing on this track, for the most part. When she doesn’t sound amazing, she’s forcing Jamaican inflections that are so obnoxiously forced it’s borderline racist. Not3s can’t sing, so he decides to mumble back in the mix with Mabel bringing some liveliness to his verse, while he switches up his flow that combines rapping and singing into a weird mush of Future-like nonsense except much more audible. The one thing bringing these two songs down is the guest rapper, but again, their involvement is not noticeable enough to really make them bad songs, or even mediocre. This is pretty nice, and I hope when Mabel’s album comes around, this track is replaced with one without Not3s. Not3s’ name is fitting because his verses are comparable to leet-speak: they’re wastes of time and I’m sick of them.

​#21 - "Diplomatic Immunity" - Drake

I despise Drake to my very core because of his complete lack of interesting qualities, but when he really starts spitting, you have a really good song on your hands. This is no exception, with the orchestral intro leading into a chilled trap beat where Drake can just freestyle bars about, yes, bragging of course, but he pulls it off, with more enthusiasm than he usually has, and some really funny punchlines. While I wish the bass wasn’t as high in the mix as it is, it doesn’t affect the song that much. The several vocal samples of a female voice throughout the track had some soulful smoothness to an otherwise trap beat, making a beautiful contrast between the grittiness of the hi-hats as well as Drake himself (who now listens to heavy metal for meditation; thanks for that update, Aubrey) and the orchestral instruments, which break down into an intense outro which is probably one of the best and most interesting moments in Drake’s career. It’s not that hard, to be fair, but this is taking the cake. If the bass wasn’t as prominent as it was and Drake’s rhymes were tighter, this could have taken best of the week.

​#1 - “God’s Plan” - Drake

So, this is the big debut from Drake, and is it any interesting? No. Oh, you want me to talk about it? Too bad. Drake doesn’t deserve any more of my interest, and he doesn’t deserve any more of yours. The keys in the background make this a really hard listen, with the autotuned Drake crooning not helping, and when he’s not singing, he’s rapping, but the length of these verses are so short I can just ignore their existence. This is background music, and Drake is a background person who is unfairly pushed into the forefront. Drake has talent, but the sheer oversaturation of him on the charts and in the public conscience is too much for me to handle, and I’m sure it’s too much for Drake to handle. In this case, I understand why his music is so full of dread and reeks of laziness; he can’t truly make what he wants to make and what he has a passion for simply because he is afraid of his relevancy slowly fading away, and I can’t blame him in the world of one-hit wonders and stream-hungry Soundcloud rappers making undeserved waves in the mainstream because at this point, anyone can have a hit, and Drake is one of the very few true pop stars in the game right now. Does this sound familiar? Well, that’s because a similar situation happened between Lil Wayne and Birdman. The apple doesn’t fall too far from the Young Money tree, huh. This is still a bore of a song, though, and totally did not deserve to break all-time streaming numbers.

Conclusion

So, we ended this week on a slightly depressing note, but overall, this week is awesome, and I don’t think I can even give a worst of the week or a dishonourable mention because the only reason “God’s Plan” fails is because of its drab production and unenthusiastic vocals. Surprise, surprise! That’s Drake for you. Honourable mentions go to “Diplomatic Immunity” and “Sick Boy” by the Chainsmokers for being awesome anthems for the OVO label and... ironic sick boys...? The best of the week goes to pop perfection, as it probably will until I grow sick of the “so-perfect-it’s-boring” trend of songs that seem to be more popular in the UK than the US by a landslide, “These Days” by Rudimental featuring Jess Glynne, Macklemore and Dan Caplen. I’d make predictions but I don’t know what to expect, maybe a Fall Out Boy song or something? God knows. See ya next time on Reviewing the Charts!