#seong on
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fandomlockedfan Β· 2 years ago
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kitty4president Β· 9 months ago
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did yall catch that new switch drop, who'd have thought sega would actually loan out the yakuza series to nintendo for this kind of collab!!
βœ¨πŸ²πŸ¦€πŸβœ¨
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trueebeauty Β· 7 months ago
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β€œAre you afraid of me?”
Are you afraid of them? - lookism men
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β€œYou wish.”
Honestly, they wished you were afraid of them sometimes. Then maybe you could see how they weren’t good for you. But then again, they were relieved you weren't afraid. It meant you trusted them, and that trust meant everything to them.
"Ouch, sorry to disappoint. I'll try to be more terrifying next time.”
π’π„πŽππ†π‰πˆ π˜π”πŠ - πŠπ„ππ“π€ πŒπ€π†π€πŒπˆ - π“π€π„π’πŽπŽ πŒπ€Β 
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β€œSometimes.”
And could they even blame you for that? They scared themselves at times too. Their actions or words occasionally made them question their own intentions or motivations. They understand.
silence, an intense look
Β πŽπ‹π‹π˜ 𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐆 - π‘π˜π”π‡π„πˆ πŠπ”π‘πŽπƒπ€ - π‰πŽπ‡π€π π’π„πŽππ† - π—πˆπ€πŽπ‹πŽππ†Β Β 
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β€œWhy would I?”
The pure confusion on your face makes their heart flutter with joy. The thought that you can't fathom any reason to be afraid of them softens their features into a warm smile.
warm smile "You know me better than that."Β 
πƒπ€ππˆπ„π‹ ππ€π‘πŠ - π’πˆππ” 𝐇𝐀𝐍 - π‰π€πŠπ„ 𝐊𝐈𝐌 - π™π€π‚πŠ 𝐋𝐄𝐄 - 𝐉𝐀𝐂𝐄 ππ€π‘πŠ - π‰π€π˜ π‡πŽππ†Β (everyone listed here is a GREEN FLAG)
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β€œShould I be afraid?”
Good question... Should you be afraid of them? It's not an easy question to answer. They know they can be intimidating at times, even if they don't intend to be.
considers for a long moment "Sometimes I'm not sure myself."
οΏ½οΏ½πˆππ˜π„πŽππ† ππ€π‘πŠ - π’πˆππ” 𝐇𝐀𝐍 - π„π‹πˆ 𝐉𝐀𝐍𝐆 - π‰π€π„π†π˜π„πŽπ 𝐍𝐀 - π‰πˆπ‚π‡π€ππ† πŠπ–π€πŠΒ 
β€œYou should be.”
π’π€πŒπ”π„π‹ π’π„πŽ - π†πŽππ†π’π„πŽπ π‰πˆ - π•πˆπ π‰πˆπ
( + the β€˜yOu ShOuLd bE’ : 𝐄𝐔𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐄 - π‡π€ππ†π˜π„πŽπ”π‹ ππ€π„πŠ )
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β€œNah. You’re a big softie.”
You're absolutely right. They don't even know why they asked such a question. Despite their attempts to come across as tough or intimidating at times, deep down they're quite gentle and kind-hearted.
smiles tenderly "Only for you."
 𝐄𝐔𝐍𝐓𝐀𝐄 𝐋𝐄𝐄 - π‰π„π‘π‘π˜ πŠπ–πŽπ - π‰πŽπ‡π€π π’π„πŽππ† - π‰πˆππ„πŽπŒ πŠπ–π€πŠ - π‰πˆπ‡π€π πŠπ–π€πŠ - π‡π”πƒπ’πŽπ 𝐀𝐇𝐍 ( + dare I say : π•πˆπ π‰πˆπ )
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β€œYeah. I mean, kinda. No... Definitely.”
Definitely. You should run for the hills when it comes to them. Their words and actions are unpredictable and even dangerous at times. Being afraid of them is a completely understandable response.Β 
nods solemnly "Smart move. The real me is best avoided."
𝐆𝐔𝐍 ππ€π‘πŠ - π†πŽπŽ 𝐊𝐈𝐌 - π‰π€πŒπ„π’ 𝐋𝐄𝐄 - 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐄𝐒 π‚π‡πŽπˆ - π†πˆπ“π€π„ 𝐊𝐈𝐌 - π’π€πŒπ”π„π‹ π’π„πŽ - π“π€π„π‰πˆπ π‚π‡π„πŽπ ( aka - THE RED FLAGS)
"I'm working on it, I swear. This isn't who I want to be..."
π†π€ππ‘π˜πŽππ† 𝐊𝐈𝐌 - π„π‹πˆ 𝐉𝐀𝐍𝐆 - π˜π”π’π„πŽππ†
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strawmoney Β· 1 day ago
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Them
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wannaeatramyeon Β· 1 month ago
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Your Adventures as the Lookismverse Designer
G/N. Run-ins with Burn Knuckles, Goddog, Allied and Big Deal. Masterlists
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Being in the Fashion department, you had assumed your classmates had a passion for fashion. For god's sake, it's in the name.
But no, you're wrong.
Apart from using it as an excuse to wear designer brands from head to toe, no one really gave a shit.
No one cared about the history, about design, fabrication, construction.
No one... apart from you that is.
.
.
Your first client wasn't really someone you could say no to unless you had a death wish.
When the whole of the Architecture department shows up along with Vasco, their terrifying leader, you consider running off and screaming.
It was only Jace Park, who seemed to understand a more subtle approach and how intimidating they looked, that stopped you from wanting to flee to the teacher.
(Strange. You actually don't recall seeing your teacher for months.)
"Please," Jace murmurs to Vasco and he's practically begging. "You didn't need to turn up with everyone. Just leave this to me. Please."
If you didn't know better, you would think Vasco was giving him grateful puppy eyes. But that can't be right. He's a thug.
"Sorry," Jace turns to you, looking contrite and fiddling anxiously with his big ears when you're finally on your own. "Are you the Fashion Designer?"
It should have been a stupid question, considering you're in the Fashion Department.
Except you look around at the so-called boxer who pitifully simps after the brunette all day, the rich blonde kid who never talks to anyone, the other girl who is an aspiring streamer and you sigh to yourself.
"Yes, that's me."
.
.
All things considered, the Burn Knuckles are very easy to please.
It's a design printed on some pre-made boilersuits, not exactly avant garde.
You did touch up the logo though and provided some more clothing options than requested. Boilersuits in a small selection of colours, bomber and leather jackets.
When you hand over the boxes to Vasco and Jace, the latter shakes your hand and the former stares at you with tears in his eyes and asks how they can ever repay you.
You shrug. Because he did already pay you for your time and the materials.
"Don't worry about it." You say, giving him a polite grin.
Vasco beams and you think maybe this guy isn't so scary.
.
.
.
.
Somehow your reputation precedes you.
To be honest you didn't even realise you had any sort of reputation until a guy with a messy mop head and two dogs corners you in an alleyway.
"I heard you're the Designer," he grunts.
A part of you thinks of fleeing once again. A smaller part of you thinks damn, that nickname is kinda cool.
"I am?"
"Don't play dumb. I know who you are."
You would have found him rude and menacing if not for his dogs picking that exact moment to roll around on the floor belly-up, desperately wanting some attention.
"Fuck's sake," he mutters though he squats down anyway to pat them. "So?" he continues, trying to regain his previous threatening aura even as the pups wriggle around under his touch.
"So what?"Β  you ask, not able to stop the smile creeping over your face at this adorable sight.
"I need some clothing."
.
.
Perhaps the Burn Knuckles gave you a false sense of bravado, thinking everyone would be as easy as them. Unfortunately, this guy is a goddamn headache.
He wants hoodies, which isn't an issue but he wants matching dog-sized ones and he wants you to design the logo from scratch too.
"But I don't do graphic design," you cry and he pretends he can't hear you.
On your twelfth iteration, he doesn't glare at it and praise the heavens; he's finally happy.
Well, happy is an overstatement. He doesn't exactly look happy but he's no longer glaring at you, so you assume in Johan Seong's world, that means he's exhilarated.
The hoodies fit, both Johan and the dogs, and the logo looks good too.
You wave goodbye to the back of all three. Your bank balance is healthier except you hope they never darken your doorstep again.
.
.
(You have no such luck. He returns, months later, requesting tracksuits.)
.
.
.
.
It's a sorry state of affairs when three of the members of Allied are part of the Fashion Department, and come to you asking for help.
"Why don't you design it yourself?" you ask Daniel Park, Zack Lee and Jay Hong.
They look at you like you've grown two heads.
.
.
You will be eternally grateful that Jay Hong is mute, that Vasco is actually the sweetest cinnamon roll, and Daniel Park is pretty easy-going because having Vin Jin and Zack Lee constantly bickering and criticising your design is bad enough.
Apparently these men are very adept fighters. Caught up in some gang shit. It didn't matter. You still wanted to ram your pen through their skulls.
Then throw in someone else called Hudson Ahn who also seems to like giving rude, overly critical comments concealed as constructive criticism -
You threatened to quit more than once.
.
.
Eventually, after staying awake for 46 hours - you all agree on a logo.
"Here." You thrust the USB drive with the files at Daniel Park.
"What do I do with this?"
"You're in the Fashion Department too." You rub at your tired eyes, patience long gone with these morons. "Find a clothing printer yourself. Search for it on the internet. You know what that is right? The internet?"
Somewhere to your right, Vin Jin bursts into laughter.
.
.
.
.
You can't decide if this guy is trying to sell you something or if you're actually falling in love with him by the second.
Hell, he could sell you some snake-oil and you're so charmed you don't mind.
"So, you'll do it?" he asks, holding your hands in his larger gloved ones and you feel yourself simpering like an idiot at the contact.
"Sure thing, Mr. Kim."
"Jake," he says, giving you a toothy grin. "I'm Jake. And this is Jerry."
"Who?"
"Jerry Kwon," A large hulking man steps up besides Jake, offering you a handshake.
What? How did you miss him? You didn't notice him at all.
"Oh. Uh. Of course. Nice to meet you too Jerry."
"Come here, guys." Jake signals for the other men hanging back to come forth. "Ths is Brad and Jerry and Lineman."
Shit. Damnit, you've been so fixated on Jake Kim that you ignored everyone else.
Hell. You didn't even realise there was anyone else.
"Hi," you say, wanting the ground to swallow you up and blushing furiously.
Jake catches your eye and gives you a wink.
.
.
Being completely honest, the Big Deal tracksuits aren't your best work.
You're not too sure on the logo design (though hey - that's not really your handiwork). The placement is a little awkward and the design is sort of plain.
You added gold elements to at least make it a bit more cohesive, and sourced extra durable fabricsΒ with lots of movement as apparently the guys have a tendency to damage clothing during fights.
"What do you think?" Jake says, modelling your finalised version.
From the smile on his face, you could tell he's very much satisfied with your work.
"Looks great," you say and you're telling the truth. Although it's not really the tracksuit that looks great, but the man wearing it. His broad shoulders and tight waist, long muscular legs and-
Oops. You silently apologise for objectifying him.
The way your eyes rake over his form isn't subtle, though it's definitely flattering. Jake playfully throws another wink your way.
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jkmc Β· 11 months ago
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are u ok kid?
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levispersonalslave Β· 4 months ago
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In the soft glow of the lamp, he carefully takes your hand in his and guides you to the vanity, where he had set out a plush towel and comb beforehand.
Your hair is still damp from the bath you’ve just taken, and he’d offered to help you brush and dry it.
You settle on the fluffy stool as he takes the comb from the table and begins to gently run it through your hair. It glides smoothly through the strands, and he takes great care not to tug at any stray tangles. The rhythm of his strokes is soothing, and neither of you speak.
Occasionally, he pauses to plant a chaste kiss on your head or whisper a sweet compliment, causing a soft tint to dust your cheeks. The room is silent, even the din of the town beyond the window seems to have died down for the two of you. Only the soft rustle of the brush and the gentle sound of his kisses is heard.
As he finishes brushing your hair out, he gathers the strands in his palm in a delicate embrace and places a final kiss on the nape of your neck. He looks at you through the reflection of the mirror, offering a small, tender smile.
Kento Nanami, Levi Ackerman, Choso Kamo, Armin Arlert, Jing Yuan, Suguru Geto, Yeon Skylar, Seong Chan-il, Boothill, Argenti + Any of your favs
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firstaffiliatepatient Β· 2 years ago
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dreemurr-skelememer Β· 9 months ago
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theygere so fucking sick and twisted . (i want them to be happy forever)
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linusbenjamin Β· 2 days ago
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Squid Game 1.01 Γ— Red Light, Green Light
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redninjaaaaa Β· 4 months ago
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the yapper:
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the listener:
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amphitriteswife Β· 2 months ago
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Hey! Can you please write what would you do if i like someone else for gun, jake, johan and eli? Thank you ❀️
β€˜What would you do if i like someone else?’
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Jonggun rolled his eyes at you when you asked him that question, his lips wrapped around the cigarette in his mouth, held up by his index and middle finger. He took a long drag and closed his eyes before he let the smoke leave his mouth slowly, savoring the taste and tapping the ash off the cigarette. β€˜You ask stupid questions.’ Jonggun said wiping the ash off his lips. He took a seat on the couch and invited you to sit next to him, it was weird. Most of the time he just said and did what was necessary. Perhaps he felt rather nostalgic today? It was rare to see him vulnerable or sentimental. So what was he getting at? β€˜Answerrrrrr’ you told him impatiently but still sitting next to him. You wanted him to answer your questions, they’re fun and interesting. He needs to be quick! β€˜I frankly don’t think you will.’ β€˜Will what?’ β€˜Like someone else. Not ever.’ β€˜Why’s that? What if i find a new babe?’ β€˜Impossible.’ β€˜Whyy?’ Jonggun sighed and pushed your head so that it was laying on his shoulder. He pushed the almost done cigarette onto the ashtray and placed a kiss on your lips, he tasted very ashy-like which made you cough. β€˜IEUW’ you pushed him off you and breath for fresh air which made him chuckle at you lightly. β€˜You told me I’m the only man you’ll ever love. And i trust your word for it.’ The answer made you stop in your tracks which made him give you another kiss instead and going back to literally another cigarette.
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β€˜Well feelings are humane so…’ Jake said quietly, still contemplating your question. Perhaps you being sarcastic and asking a lot of questions was too much to handle for him? The question was supposed to be a joke and not that serious at all. β€˜What would you do jakey?’ Jake pondered very hard, harder than he had when he was taking his exams last week, he needed a clear head to think. He thought long and hard before he answered. β€˜Hmmm i would accept.’ He stated proudly. His eyes helt a certain type of twinkle in them. β€˜Wrong! You’re supposed to say that i’m yours!’ β€˜You are mine! And i am yours!’ β€˜Then why are you accepting it if i liked someone else?’ β€˜Because i love you.’ You gave him a confused look. Yeah he did love you, but that doesn’t explain what he’s saying?? Jake noticed your confused expression and smiled. β€˜I love you, so even if you loved someone else. At the end of the day I want you to be happy.’ You looked at him and he looked back at you, his hands wrapping you in a tight hug with a wide grin on his face. Perhaps your joke was taken a little too serious…he was so sweet and selfless about it. It was a stereotypical Jake action, always thinking of others first. But what about Jakey himself? He was thinking of you first but what about his own heart, it almost made you emotional thinking about it. β€˜If i ever leave you, hit me on the head.’ β€˜What?’
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Johan was sitting outside by the lake. His dogs were busy woofing around and playing with each other. He felt tired, very tired. He couldn’t help but wonder if an adult’s life was also so tiresome, working for the White Tiger center did come with a lot of work and costs…Johan let out a sigh. That’s when you popped up, his lovely partner. He was so relieved to see you. For some reason he couldn’t help but hug you tightly, his mood instantly relaxing. He kissed your cheek and watched you sit next to him on the park bench, talking to him about numerus things before you finally asked the question. Johan just stared at you for a few seconds, you could see the him processing your words and the way his eyes narrowed at you. He clearly disliked the question you asked him. Johan isn’t someone who likes it when someone takes it something from him…or when he loses someone again…so for him this wasn’t just a question but a hypothetical situation that could be true. β€˜You wouldn’t…..you wouldn’t, would you?’ β€˜It’s a joke.’ β€˜Right.’ It came out more sarcastic than it was meant to be and the both of you knew it. You made Johan angry….the way his jaw was clenched and the veins in his neck now visible didn’t go unnoticed but you. But because for amusement you pretended to now know and ask further. β€˜What would you do dawg?’ You knew Johan didn’t like it when you called him that, yet you did it anyway. Are you making him angry on purpose? β€˜I would steal his shoes so that i could sell them.’ β€˜Are you poor?’ β€˜Yes.’ β€˜Oh- uhm. I can lend you money?’ β€˜Gladly.’ Normally you wouldn’t have doe that so quickly, but this time he was mad at you so you gave him your spare change. Which for some reason made him super happy and go back to normal again. What a cheapskate
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Eli gave you a deadpanned look when you asked him the question. Yenna, who was in his arms was puling on his hair and trying to climb on top of his head. He didn’t know how to feel. Should he be angry or hurt? Maybe even insecure? What the hell was this question even supposed to mean? β€˜What are you getting at Y/N?’ Eli asked you quite suspiciously, he doesn’t like this, not the question nor where you might go with this. β€˜I want to know what you’ll do.’ You asked him casually, waiting for a response. He doesn’t know what to think. His hands grabbed Yenna gently and lifted her off his head and placed her on his lap instead. He was feeling conflicted, on one hand he didn’t want you to leave. He wanted to protect you and keep you with him. On the other hand he felt that it was selfish of him to make you stay if you didn’t want to. He pressed his lips in a thin line, Yenna was trying to get out of his lap and get onto yours instead. Yenna really has gotten attached to you in the times you spent here, sometimes she denied playing with him to play with you instead…he really doesn’t want you to leave. His hands softly scooted Yenna back to him which caused her to whine and crawl right from under his arm to you. β€˜I don’t want you to leave…is that selfish?’ Eli asked you a little softer, watching Yenna crawl over to you and sit in your lap instead. You couldn’t help but feel bad. You didn’t make him insecure right? He sounded so sad. β€˜I wouldn’t leave. It’s just a hypothetical question.’ β€˜So no leaving me or yenna?’ β€˜If i leave i’d take yenna with me.’ β€˜Don’t steal my daughter. I don’t appreciate it.’ β€˜Whoa sorry calm down-’
β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”-
Thank you for the ask! πŸ’•β­οΈπŸ™
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sscarletvenus Β· 7 months ago
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lookism tweets to keep the populace entertained
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krystaljungs Β· 2 months ago
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FAMILY BY CHOICE 쑰립식 κ°€μ‘± episode 05, dir. Kim Seung Ho
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wannaeatramyeon Β· 1 month ago
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Lookism Guys Listening to You Ramble
G/N. Just something light hearted. Masterlists
"Sorry," you say, looking sheepish.
You must have talked nonstop for the last ten minutes. Not that he's complained much about it. Nevertheless, when it's something you're particularly passionate about, you can't help yourself. It's a habit you're trying to break out of.
"I was rambling again, right?"
.
.
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Ryuhei continues looking at you like the lovestruck fool that he is.
Fact is, he tuned out when you were only a few sentences in, preferring to bathe in the melody of your voice, bask in the centre of your attention instead. He looks at your pretty face and your full lips and he's just grateful to be here.
.
.
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Goo grins, "Yep, but don't stop sweetheart."
He's self aware enough to know that he absolutely loves the sound of his own voice and you have done your own fair share of listening. It's the least he can do. Besides, seeing you light up when you talk about something you're passionate about is absolutely adorable.
.
.
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"Yes," Gun deadpans, face blank but eyes soft. "I don't mind."
He's never felt the urge to tell you to shut up. To be honest, ramblings that would have started a headache from anyone else, he can't get enough of when it's from you. He's so used to the silence when on his own that your voice is a welcome reminder of your company.
.
.
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Vin peeks at you over his sunglasses and shrugs. "I stopped listening ages ago."
You huff a little even if you did apologise, because what a rude asshole. And you don't hesitate to tell him so.
But beneath the facade, he has taken every word to heart and when he later asks a question so specific to a throwaway sentence during your ramble, you can't help smiling at how closely he was listening.
.
.
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"Yeah," Jake pulls you close and kisses you sweetly on the forehead, " but I like it."
He will happily listen to you talk about anything. It's a nice break from some of the troubles of Big Deal, reminding him that the world is bigger than his bubble and as a bonus, you're cute as hell especially talking about your latest interest.
.
.
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"It's fine," Johan mutters, tips of his ears pink.
He has no problem telling most people to shut the hell up but he can never bring himself to be mean to you. Besides, you know he's telling the truth. He listens, face soft and content, not even realising he's wearing a small smile for you.
.
.
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Samuel rolls his eyes and pulls you into his lap.
He's a great listener. Honed after years of working in the corporate world, listening to far more dull and boring people. Whatever you say is infinitely more interesting.
Samuel tells you this, arms wrapped around you and face nuzzling into your neck.
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jaylver Β· 7 months ago
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THE FIVE YEAR DEAL β€” P.JS
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synopsis: having to deal with a four year long situationship was hard enough in the first place, but when your favourite situationship texted you on a random night after a year of no contact, it was a much harder scenario than imagined. what happens when he brings up that old pact you made about getting married in 5 years and you start rekindling a relationship that was lost?
pairings: non-idol!jay x afab!reader
genre: ex-situationship to friends to lovers, second chance romance, angst, romance, pining
warning(s): profanities, drinking and partying, slight violence
wc: 6.5k
a/n: after a month of not posting, here's a very very belated jay fic that was meant to be for his birthday (scream). please leave a feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated! muah xx
masterlist | Β© jaylver all rights reserved.
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Park Jong Seong was your roman empire. There, you actually said it.
He was a thought that constantly hovered in your mind from time to time. Whether he was a ghost that lingered to haunt you or a sweet thought that remained, you couldn't tell. All you knew was that he had changed your life for the better and the worst.
A lesson you'd often tell others is to never get yourself involved in a situationship, worse if it's with your best friend. Unfortunately, you were speaking from experience which involved Jay, your ex situationship slash best friend. Look how you and him eventually turned out.
An almost four year long situationship with Jay that took an absolute toll on you had ended the year before. You agreed on no contact with him after, trying to create a peaceful life without him out of your life, yet it was entirely impossible when you shared mutual friends that reminded you of your good times with him even though he wasn't around.Β 
You hate to admit it, but losing a person who was your best friend cut deep into your gut and heart combined. It was, at least, for the better. That was something your friends told you that you gradually recited in your head. It wasn't very effective, however. You still thought about him, quite often actually. But you supposed that was the haunting and painful part of having a relationship with someone that was almost a lover but never became one.Β 
It was the same exact night you were thinking about him when a text appeared on the homescreen of your phone. You stared at the notification for God knows how long, debating if your lack of sleep was finally catching up to you. The contact name was unmistakable, there it was, Jay's text. Jay, your Jay?Β 
The strength you had trying to act casual, but in reality, you were dying internally. The hold that man has on you was unimaginable.Β 
jjong: you up?
you: ?
jjong: did you delete my number?
If only he knew, he would've probably laughed. You never deleted his number, nor did you even change his contact name. His name constantly stuck out in the list of contacts, just like the memories of him in your head.
you: no, i didn't. what i meant was why are you texting me at 2 am?
jjong: i thought of something, something we said four years ago
you: okay …?
jjong: you said if we're both still Β single in five years, we should get married
you: you took that seriously?
jjong: should i not have?
you: dumbass, i was tipsy
jjong: you didn't say that when i brought it up after you were sober
you: it's stupid
jjong: it's not. come on, y/n, can we please start afresh? i miss you.
He missed you? Β 
jjong: i'm serious. can we please meet up?
you: you swear you're not going to pull something?
jjong: no?? the most i'll do is pull out an engagement ring but who knows
you: cut the crap, jayΒ 
jjong: don't act like that didn't make you giggle even the slightest
jjong: meet me downtown. the usual place we go to :)
How could he act so nonchalant when bringing up the past? The usual place that you haven't been to after cutting contact with him was something he still recalled, but to you, it was a place you avoided up until now.Β 
It was hard to sleep when your mind was filled with thoughts of him, except this time, instead of missing him, you dreaded him and the part where you're going to meet him for the first time in a year. What was he going to say?Β 
The wish you wished upon the lone star that night was for Jay to finally set his feelings and emotions clear. But whether it will come true or not, the truth will soon befall on you.
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The day you planned to meet Jay was a cloudy one. It was likely a foreshadow, but you chose to ignore the overthinking you constantly did.
You were the first one there in the cafe, specifically sitting at that table by the corner which you and Jay usually hogged. Being there early due to mostly the anxiety, you got to calm your nerves down and prepare yourself to face Jay.Β 
It shouldn't be hard to meet someone you already knew, but why did it feel that way? The unspoken feelings and those that were left hanging, unaddressed, was what haunted the both of you. You supposed this meet up with him would hopefully change that the slightest bit. All you hoped for was that he didn't become a stranger to you.
You failed to realise his approaching figure as you were sitting with your back facing the entrance, it was your usual spot anyway. Not to mention, his footsteps were quiet as ever, a thing about him that was unchanging.Β 
"Y/N," you heard his voice before meeting his eyes, watching as he slipped onto the chair opposite of you, the warm aura of his never failing to provide a sense of comfort for you. "Hey,"
The change of his hair colour grabbed your attention first. The silvery colour that the light bounced on suited him well. He always wanted to experiment with his hair, and you didn't expect him to really do it. Other than that, he had the same features, same smile, same warm colour tone eyes and skin. All in all, he was the Jay you knew, the one you loved.Β Β 
"Jay," you spoke his name as if it was a foreign taste on your tongue. His irises flashed an unreadable spark at the sound of his name coming out of your mouth. You fell into silence, not knowing how to start the conversation whereas he seemed rather speechless instead.Β 
He shook himself out of it, a slight frown etched onto his lips. "Thanks for making time to see me. I know … you probably didn't want to, so I'm glad you came," his tone contradicted the way his texts sounded, the initial confidence was currently wavering.
"It's no problem," you shook your head softly, a secret hope you had kept shouting in your mind where he would fix everything.Β 
"I didn't want to leave us at that, Y/N," his sudden confession surprised you, but it left your heart beating in both anticipation and anxiety. "The way we left things, it wasn't right. I wasn't right for doing the things I did,"
You knew what he was talking about, or at least the obvious one out of the bunch. That night at his place where you were tipsy and he was holding you in his arms, you accidentally let out the secret you've been holding in: you loved him. As expected, it obviously strained the relationship as he insisted on it being nothing serious. You were stupid for thinking he would've reciprocated it, but all he did was leave you stranded on the empty space of heartbreak alone.Β 
"I'm sorry. I was an asshole, and I was an idiot for not realising how much you meant to me until you weren't there next to me. You carved a hole in my life and my heart was moulded for you," his gaze fell to the table, an audible draw of breath from him.Β 
Jay glanced up to lock his eyes with yours again, the twitch of his hand that was holding itself back from reaching over to you. "I'm not a religious man, Y/N, but every night I prayed for God to lead me back to you," he swallowed thickly, "I know I fucked up, that's why we stopped … everything. I deserved it, but I really want to fix everything,"
You opened your mouth to speak just to close it after a passing second. He said exactly what you wished for him to say, but why was it so hard grasping everything before you? Was it the shock?Β 
"I missed you, Jay," it was the truth, an angering truth that you held onto for ages. "I really did. I think about you a lot and the mistakes we made. I wish we could go back to the way we were. You're my best friend," you knew that word wasn't just what it was, it held something more than that. "And I just want you back,"
The softening of his gaze only exposed the vulnerability on your face. "Can we start again?" He said quietly, seemingly testing the waters. "As friends, and we'll go slow,"
"I'd like that," you nodded, never leaving his gaze. You didn't say it, neither did he, but you weren't putting away the chances of something more than just friends, an unspoken hope that you kept. Maybe this time, everything would turn out right.Β 
Before you parted ways with Jay and left for home, you shared a simple conversation in front of the cafe. Just like old times, the conversation flowed naturally as if time didn't separated the two of you in the first place.Β 
"Can I hug you?"Β 
For the first time in many months, you felt the warmth and touch of Jay's that you missed. It was familiar, comforting, a band aid that covered the crack on your heart. This was the first step to heal that broken heart of yours. Closure. It was for the better.Β 
The rest of your day was only filled with thoughts of him, till the point where it had you lying in bed, awake and turning, wondering about the fate of you and him. A second chance was about to make or break everything.
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The next time you saw Jay again was at a party his frat brother held.Β 
Ever since that day at the cafe, you didn't stop texting Jay. You realised at one point that you had fallen back into your old self once more. Giggling at his messages, anticipating his notifications, calling him at odd hours. All of which didn't go unnoticed by you, and you wondered if you should be horrified or nonchalant. Given that you and him were on better, speaking terms now, you brushed it off as nothing.
"Well, isn't it my favourite girl," Jay had his arms wide open the moment he approached you, that smile of his glowing from a distance away.Β 
You smiled back, you always did anyway, letting him embrace you into his arms. "You smell like beer," you scrunch your nose up in distaste, pushing yourself off of him, but your arms around his shoulders remain.
"But I'm sober," he casted a wink at you, ignoring your eye roll as he took your arm from your shoulder and slid his fingers into your hand. "Come on, the guys are over there,"
To think about explaining this to the rest of your friends was going to be interesting to say the least. They already knew from your continuous text screaming for bloody help, but for them to witness it in person? You couldn't help but wish to cower into a corner out of embarrassment.
Heeseung was the first to raise a discreet eyebrow at you when you approached, hands intertwined with Jay, the same guy you swore you cut contacts with. That's a lie, apparently. Jake and Sunghoon seemed impassive, but you could tell from their several exchanges of glances, they thought the same as Heeseung did. However, both you and Jay were their friends, and no matter how messy it was, they were just the people stuck in between.
Jay eventually excused himself from the conversation to get more drinks for himself. You had a feeling he was about to be drunk by the end of the night no matter how he denied that. You knew his patterns through and through. Once he was out of ear shot, the boys turned to stare at you accusingly.
"Did you guys kiss?" Jake was the first to be blunt. The other two were eager to know the truth as well.
You practically jumped in your seat, as if a bullet had shot through your chest. In that way, his zero filtered question had that effect. "What? No! We agreed on being just friends,"
"For now," Heeseung chimed in.
"What?"
"You were literally holding hands with him,"Β 
"It's platonic,"
"Considering your past with him, I think that's the last thing you can claim as platonic when it comes to Jay," Heeseung quipped back, making a valid point that you chose to ignore.
"Whatever. We're currently friends and we're not rushing into anything. We don't want to ruin it," you rubbed your arm uneasily, the thought of your past recurring saddened you.Β 
"Then when are you going to actually get together?" Sunghoon asked, sounding rather exasperated as though he's the one in your position. At one point, you wished you could trade places.Β 
"Ask him that," you leaned your head onto Jake's shoulder for emotional support, the question from Sunghoon was a second bullet to your heart. You had been the one sending signals from the start, but when it came to Jay reciprocating it, it was rather bleak.
"You're still hung over him? It never … went away?" Heeseung leaned his body closer, increasingly immersed into the conversation deeper.
"How could it go away when I've always been in love with him?"
The words stuck to you throughout the night. The truth and reality of you loving a man that threw everything away was a burden you carried. The egging thought of wondering if Jay even reciprocated the feelings after a year crept into your head. He didn't reach out to reconnect for nothing, did he?
Just as you've guessed, Jay was truly drunk out of his mind by the time the party was ending. Your friends were trying their best to haul Jay into his apartment while you trailed behind, wishing you were more of help than this. Jay was eventually dumped onto his bed, slurring out random sentences that made zero sense to you.
"Do you need me to drop you back? I didn't drink," Heeseung turned to you first once all of you stepped out of Jay's room.Β 
"I'll be fine. I didn't drink much, so I think I can drive myself back. I also want to stay a while more to make sure he's fine," you took a glance back at the open bedroom door, seeing Jay still awake and turning uncomfortably.Β 
"Will you be okay? I mean, you just started talking again, I don't want you to be uncomfortable," Heeseung placed an assuring hand on your shoulder, concern filled eyes boring into yours. You hadn't even thought about this before, the emotions you had whenever with Jay.Β 
You smiled at your friend. "It's Jay. I will never feel that way about him,"
Heeseung reciprocated your smile, seemingly more relieved. "I know."
Your friends soon left, the loud sounds of their drunken chatters faded into the night, leaving you in a deafening silence. A deep intake of breath was what helped you regain your confidence back to finally step into Jay's room, facing a dazed looking Jay who was sitting on the edge of his bed. He seemed a tad bit more sober from the multiple cups of water he had drunk.Β 
"Are you alright?" You took a few steps forward, holding onto the doorframe.
He glanced up, the dim light provided by his desk lamp illuminated his face, the sharpness of his features contrasted the tears he had swimming in his eyes. It was unmistakable, but it weighed you down onto the ground, not knowing if you should be taking another step.Β 
"Jay?" You called out cautiously, swallowing thickly. A quiet sob broke the short silence which followed, the glistening tears made their way down his cheeks. It was your first time seeing him as vulnerable as this.
You got to his side, knelt on the ground, trying to search for his gaze which persisted to run away from yours. He tried hiding his face behind his hands, but you were quick to stop him, holding onto them tightly. It was then he was forced to finally meet your eyes.Β 
"I'm sorry," you heard his weak voice utter out, his hand that you held onto gripped yours. "I'm sorry," he whispered tearfully.
It was your first time witnessing him this broken, crying nonstop and leaving his emotions out on display. For the first time in ages, you couldn't properly read him like you've always done. Was it your fault for making him feel this way? Was there nothing but pain in this so-called relationship you and him shared?
"I miss you," it was a confession, a painful sounding confession that he's held onto for a long time, the look in his eyes told you he meant it, but there was something else that he had: grief. "I'm sorry,"
You didn't know how long it was that you stared at him for, the thoughts in your mind had been long gone, the shell of your body remained. His words and the emotions behind them were heavier than you anticipated, it hit you hard and rough. You sighed, lowering your head for a second. "You should get some sleep, Jay. It's late and you're buzzed. I'll talk to you in the morning,"
Jay was silent. You could tell there was a hint of disappointment from him that you wished you weren't the cause of it. You got up to your feet, staring at the top of his head as he fought to avoid your eyes. So be it. As you turned to leave, you felt a hand around your wrist, pulling you to a stop.
"Will you stay?"
You've heard this one too many times. Yet, you were always a victim to it. Unlike most times, you knew this was different, letting your heart guide you to him instead of your head. It might've been foolish, but you were willing to be a fool that was persistently in love just for him.
"I'll stay."
That night, you barely slept as he laid in your lap, sound asleep. Your fingers traced the sharpness of his features, smoothing over the softness of them. You wondered to yourself whether reconnecting was a good idea in the first place if this odd feeling of yours kept cutting deep into your heart every time you're with Jay.Β 
You would never wish to leave him once more, but did he feel the same as you do? Or will he be the first to let you go again?Β 
Maybe, just this once, you'd have to be the first to let go, even if it's a small step, it was something better than nothing.
With one last apologetic look at Jay, you closed his bedroom door and left his home with a heavier heart than usual. By the time morning comes, you hoped both yours and his memories from the night before would be a fever dream. Something so intimate and vulnerable, how were you to forget quickly? Even as you drifted off to sleep in your bed, you could still remember the tears on Jay's face, it being the last thing you remember before waking up to your doorbell ringing.
It was as if your thoughts had manifested Jay to show up at your doorstep. He wasn't a figment of your imagination, but actual flesh and bones. No matter how you rubbed your eyes trying to get yourself to be more awake, he wasn't disappearing away from view. He was real.Β 
"Can we talk?"Β 
Those three words immediately brought dread for you. Jay's face was impassive, but it was evident that he was tired, restless. You nodded, moving away to let him in. It was easy for you to let him in, whether it was your home or your heart, you've always kept a space for him.
"What is it that you wanted to talk about?" You stepped closer to him, seeing as he hadn't taken a seat and feeling something odd shift in the air.
"Us, Y/N, us," Jay breathed out, strained and hoarse, as if saying that word had pained him deeply. "I don't like this, I hate it. The 'us' that we are now,"
"What?"
"We can't keep continuing on like this. We can't keep pretending everything's fine when it's not,"
It was too early for this, too early for you to be feeling burning internal rage. "Are you kidding? So what are you going to do? Leave me alone again? Go no contact with me again just because you don't want to face me again?"
"No!" Jay took a step closer to you, eyes blazing with equal fiery as yours. "I'm not ending things again, never. I can't lose you this time," his voice wavered, his hand reaching for yours and you let him hold your hand. Was that your first mistake? "I'm in love with you,"
You wished those words hadn't left his lips. For ages, you thought him confessing his true feelings would've fixed things, fixed you and him both, but at that moment, you realised it wasn't that easy, the cracks on your heart remained.Β 
"I know when you look at me, you see everything that went wrong, but when I look at you, I see the person I'm in love with," every word pierced your heart deeper, the desperation in his voice was clear, a saddening tragedy was imminent.Β 
"You don't get to do this," you whispered, backing away from him and freeing your hand from his hold. The hurt that flashed across his eyes didn't go unnoticed by you. "You don't get to tell me you're in love with me out of nowhere after we stop talking. It's not fair,"
"Am I … too late?" His voice was quiet, in the midst of the hurt was a pinch of hope.Β 
"You're not," you didn't want to lie, you knew your feelings were the same and unchanged, but you just weren't ready to cave in and accept his feelings that fast. It wasn't fair. "Time. That's what we need to start afresh,"
Jay nodded, jaw clenched, face stoic. There was no denying that he was hurt, he didn't hide it anyway. "I'll make it right. I'll fix us."
Was it possible to mend everything?
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Attending a party to get drunk was probably the worst idea you had in a while.Β 
The thoughts of you and Jay haunted you like a sickening plague, the conversation you had with him was constantly eating you up from the inside. You were pushing him away, you knew so, you were becoming like him in some ways. How ironic it was.Β 
That was why the moment Julie invited you to her boyfriend's house party, you knew you had to have some type of getaway, though it wasn't the most ideal. The only problem you didn't appreciate her not telling you earlier was the person you wanted to avoid most was standing with the rest of your friends in a corner playing pool.
"Look, I didn't know they were coming," Julie defended herself, leaning her body close to your side. "What's up with you and Jay anyway?"
"It's complicated,"
Julie sighed, shaking her head. "Of course it is, but how blind and dumb could you both be?"
"Hey!"
"It's obvious you like him and he likes you, why can't you guys justβ€”I don't knowβ€”get together?"Β 
"It's not that easy, I wish it was. I think we're both hurt, or I'm the coward this time. We … talked, he finally said he loves me, but I can't accept it just yet,"
"Why not?"
"I gave my heart to him, Julie. For years I willingly gave my heart to a man that constantly blocked me from his heart, which was why we ended things. Only then he realised his true feelings and right now he's asking for my heart back. I just don't think it's fair," your eyes dropped to the carpeted ground, gripping onto your plastic cup tightly.
"Then would you rather regret it?"
"Huh?"
"Would you regret after pushing him away and never becoming something you've always wished to be? Constantly think about the what-ifs? I know I'm not in the right to say anything since I'm not you, but the only thing I wish to say is to go with your heart," she placed a hand on your shoulder. "If your heart yearns for him, it'll always stay that way."
Why couldn't you stop your heart from yearning for Jay? It was as if Julie had read you like a book, even in those times where you and him stopped contacting one another, you never once forgot about him. It was true, your heart was yearning for him.Β 
Meeting new people that were introduced by Julie and her boyfriend momentarily took your mind off Jay. Their friends were people you probably wouldn't meet again, so you didn't mind when you were left alone with one of them.Β 
"You come by here often?" Juyeon, one of the guys, was by your side like a leech instead of being a good company. His presence was screaming red blaring signals to you.
"Not much," you chuckled awkwardly, wondering when Julie would return with the rest of her friends.
"Can I take you out some time?" Wow, he sure knew how to cut to the chase.Β 
"What?"
"I was wondering if you'd like to come by to my place after this?"
Oh, this was your sign to run, wasn't it? "Iβ€”well, I have someone to meetβ€”"
"Come on, give me a chanceβ€”" he grabbed onto your hand right before you could successfully leave, this was when you remind yourself never to get involved with frat boys.
"Sorryβ€”" you didn't have the chance to finish your sentence when your hand was forcefully ripped away from his hold, another familiar feeling of someone's hand on yours instead. You turned just in time to see Jay standing beside you, visibly fuming.
"Leave her alone, man," he placed himself in front of you, shielding you away from Juyeon.Β 
"Look, I'm just trying to invite her over. You know what, she's nothing special anywayβ€”" the sound of Jay's fist clashing into Jueyon's jaw stopped him from continuing on. You were too shocked to comprehend everything happening before you, even as Jay lunged onto the man, you could do nothing but stare.Β 
"Jay!" The shouts of his name clicked in your mind, breaking you out of your shell-shocked state. Every one of your friends rushed to get Jay off of Juyeon who ended up scrambling away, leaving a crowd of onlookers.Β 
He was hesitant to turn around and look at you, you could tell so from his stiff shoulders, but you stayed hoping to see his face. You reached your hand out shakily to touch his shoulder, yet, before you could actually do so, he turned around, eyes avoiding to meet yours.
"Jayβ€”"Β 
There he went brushing past you, not a single word spoken from him. The slamming of the front door snapped you out of the hurtful daze you were in to follow him out of the house. He was standing on the pavement, unmoving. You approached him carefully, scared and paranoid of executing a wrong move.
"Jay," you walked to stand before him, feeling a tinge of hurt when he took a step back away from you. "Jay," you repeated his name, this time with a bit more desperation. "Why did you do that?" There was no answer, only a sullen silence which blurred into the night.Β 
You shifted your attention to his fist, the forming of a bruise and some cracked skin decorated the fist he used to punch Juyeon. Your hand absentmindedly reached for his. "You're hurt," you were about to touch his hand when he pulled away, avoiding your hold, a look of hurt flashed across your features, but you tried to hide it.
"I can't let him talk to you like that," he whispered, looking anywhere but you. You wished to grab his shoulder and forcefully make him look at you.Β 
"Jay, it's okay,"
"It's not!" He snapped, finally having the nerves to meet your eyes. His change of tone shocked you, your feet took a step back unknowingly. "It's not okay. Not when I feel like I'm going insane thinking you're going to get yourself in danger,"
"I'm sorryβ€”"
"Don't," Jay heaved a breath in, voice shaking slightly. "I should be the one to say sorry for acting this way. I'm sorry,"Β 
"Jayβ€”"Β 
"I'll see you around. Get home safe." You couldn't even reach him and he was already gone, leaving into the night. There was a twisting feeling in your heart that was unbearable. Was this the end of it all?Β 
You felt even worse walking back into the house when the rest of your friends asked you about Jay and his whereabouts. It was awkward staying there after what went down, so you ended up going back home too, throwing yourself in bed to forget everything that had happened.Β 
Jay, the fight, Juyeon, you wished those three things never happened that night. You wished you and Jay never happened at all.Β 
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"You're just going to leave it at that?"
A bottle of alcohol late at night with the company of your friends without Jay was what you needed after a rollercoaster of a events. The amount of shots you've taken wasn't enough to blur the image of Jay's tear stained cheek or the hurt in his eyes when he told you he loved you, not even the time he avoided your touch. You wondered if love was meant to be this painful. If it was, why were you so adamant on it?
"I … don't know," you set the glass down, chewing the insides of your cheek. "It'll be too cliche and stupid to say it's complicated, right? I think I'm just hurting him. I still love him, but I can't let myself to do so. It's weird, him reconnecting after a year and suddenly telling me he's in love with me out of the blue. What does all that mean?"
Sunghoon let out a hiss from the shot he took in one go, then turned to you. "Jay might be a dumbass for realising his faults and feelings a little too late, but there's one thing I'm sure about him, and that is how much he cares for you and loves you. I remember after you guys cut contact, he had trouble sleeping for months. He said the thought of you leaving haunted him,"
"I know it's unfair to you how he's only realised his true feelings now," Heeseung interjected, pouring another round into your glass. "But I think you're just hurting yourself more by pushing him away, just like how he did to you. You love him, don't you? Don't repeat the same mistakes, you've wasted a whole year together, don't waste a lifetime regretting what could've been."
Two stubborn people walking in constant circles, that was you and Jay. Too scared to face your feelings, hurting not only the other but also yourself.Β 
Being absolutely emotional and pissed drunk only resulted in you crying your eyes out, which made your friends worried out of their minds till the point where they had to call the person who would know how to comfort you. However, theyΒ  failed to realise in time that the same person was the cause of your tears.Β 
"Where is she?" You heard his voice from a mile away, it was something you'd never forget. The others were slowly leaving your apartment after hoisting you to your bedroom. The process of which involved you sobbing and your drunk friends trying not to drop you.Β 
The thudding sound of footsteps filled the silence in your home. It stopped right at the doorstep to your bedroom, the hesitation was evident when he entered after several beats. You laid on your side, facing away from him. His approaching figure made your heart race, you felt the bed dip beneath you upon him taking a seat next to you.Β 
"You're awake, aren't you?"
You glanced up at him, the dimness of your room casted a shadow across his face, but he was still the most beautiful person you've seen. You slowly sat up, trying to move your body a distance away from him to make everything less surreal. The silence in the room was overwhelming, neither of you knew what to say first.
"Do you hate me?"
"What?"Β 
"I was the first to let go this time," you chuckled dryly, doing everything but meeting his eyes, maybe you were the coward all along.
Jay let out a breath of disbelief, shaking his head. "How could I ever hate you?" It was a question, it was his truth, his dying truth that he held onto with all his heart. He glanced down, staring at his hands, the bruises from the hard punches thrown were healing. "I shouldn't have lashed out on you that night. It wasn't right for me to do so,"
In the midst of your hazy mind, your brain functioned well enough to recollect the memories he mentioned. Oh, that night, that incident. "It's alright, I know you didn't mean it, you were trying to look out for me, I get it," you averted your gaze, letting yourself smile a little to lessen the tension. "I think I was just scared,"
"Of what?"Β 
"Of you leaving again,"Β 
Jay's gaze softened in the darkness, his hand reaching out to hold yours and it was one of those times that you let him do so knowing how your heart felt like exploding. "I'm never leaving, nor do I hate you. I hate myself for pushing you away, for realising everything too late, for hurting you," he took a deep, yet shaky breath, "If anything, I love you,"
The drowsiness you were experiencing somehow disappeared in a blink of an eye, your mind blank, all you could hear in the back of your mind was those three words which Jay uttered. The air around you and him had shifted, the angry tension dissipated.Β 
You felt his hold on your hand tightening, just the same as your heart tightening at the sight of Jay's heartbroken smile. "I love you," it was a confession, something ever so freeing to finally be able to say to him knowing your true feelings were reciprocated. "I'm sorry for running away,"
Jay moved closer, his face now barely a few inches away. Everything was a blur, how his other hand travelled to cup your cheeks, his breath practically fanning your lips. "I should be the one to say sorry," those were his last words before pressing his lips on yours.
It wasn't your first time kissing him, but something about the kiss was unlike the times you've experienced.Β  Despite all those playful, lighthearted kisses you shared with Jay, you knew this was different. Jay was pouring his endless unspoken apologies and devotion, a mix of relief, sadness, longing were hidden behind it.
Even as you pulled away, you could feel the palpable longing between you and him. It was as if years of silent desperation, confusion and pining had melted into one, finally being addressed at that moment. Neither of you spoke a single word, just holding each other close, admiring one another. It was intimate, something you couldn't recreate with someone else.Β 
"I will never leave you," he whispered, his thumb stroking your cheek reassuringly. "You're a piece of me and my heart, you make me whole. I would be a fool to ever let you go again,"
You stared at him as if he was your entire universe, the effect of his every word carved a space into your heart. Eyes closing momentarily, you let yourself melt into his touch, smiling softly. "I trust you."
That was all Jay needed to hear before a small smile spread across his face. You could hear it in silence, see the look on his face and that spark he has in his brown irises, you knew what it was, he was in love.
That night, he stayed with you until morning came. You held onto one another tightly, as though scared that it was the last day to be together. Little words were exchanged, but you were content by him holding you close.Β 
For the first time in a while, you were able to fall asleep with no lingering thoughts, and for the first time ever, he was yours, and you were his.
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Telling your friends you and Jay were finally together was a rollercoaster of emotions that you'd never forget.Β 
It has been months since you and your best friend officially got together. The reactions from people around you were nothing but relief and support after knowing how much hell you two went through. For once, you actually believed in the 'forever' that was promised.
You didn't question the sound of keys unlocking your front door. It has become a habit for Jay to stop by your place every evening, almost just like before and it felt as if everything was falling back into place. Every visit of his came with something he prepared to surprise you, which was why his cheeky grin gave it away.
He pressed a kiss on the top of your head before joining you on the sofa, the playful smile of his never once left. "I have a surprise,"
"Chocolate cake?"
"Okay, something not edible,"Β 
"What is it?" You couldn't help smiling too, nudging your boyfriend in an attempt to get him to reveal his so-called surprise.
"Close your eyes,"
"Are you serious?"
"I'm serious. Come on, close them!" He was giggling, egging you on to go along with whatever he has up his sleeves. "Now, give me your hand," You complied. Not long after, you felt something cold and small making contact with the skin of your palm. "Open your eyes,"Β 
You were first met with Jay's anticipating gaze, then you looked down, seeing a ring sitting on the palm of your hand. "A ring?" You were surprised, picking it up to look at it closely. It was beautiful, simple yet so intricate in detail, as if it was customised for you.Β 
"Don't worry, it's not an engagement ring, it's a promise ring. I know we did make a five year deal, but we're still taking it slow," he picked the ring from your hold and gently took your hand, slotting the ring into your ring finger. "Maybe in another five years time, I'll actually get to fulfil our pact and replace this with an engagement ring,"
This was the closest you've felt your heart exploding. Heat rushed to your face, heart beating nonstop, you were suddenly the person who's first developed a crush for Jay all over again. "Since when did you become so cheesy," you scoffed, a small smile rested on your lips.
"Only for you, duh," it wasn't a lie whatsoever, Jay never hid himself when it came to you. "Let's call some takeout and stay in,"
"Are you staying over tonight?"
"Only if your bed is open to let me in," he made himself comfortable next to you, throwing his arms around you to pull you closer to his side.Β 
"You know it always is."
Jay didn't say anything, but his smile was enough of a response. No matter if it's your bed, house or heart, you've always reserved a spot specially for him. He made up a part of you just the same as you were with him. He was your home and safe space. You were glad you made that stupid pact on one drunken night that led him back to you.
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