#self-recognition through the other (destructive)

[literaryvein-reblogs]

Writing your Character's "Inner Critic"

Inner Critic - a mental inner voice that criticizes and judges your actions, thoughts, and behaviors.

In the early 20th century, psychoanalyst Sigmund Freud referred to it as the “superego,” and it’s been a constant source of study ever since.

Learning to address the excesses of your critical inner voice is an important element of self-care and holistic well-being.

Popular psychology movements of today—like cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT)—assist individuals with reframing their inner critic’s negative thought processes.

Negative Thoughts From Your Inner Critic

Assessing your mental health means knowing when your inner critic is doing nothing but harm. Examples of an inner voice that engages in self-destructive behaviors:

Dwelling on the past: If you regularly beat yourself up for past mistakes and regrets about life experiences, recognize that many of these thoughts are self-defeating. Your inner critic draws on memories like this to keep you incapable of growing in the present moment.

Focusing on shortcomings: Your inner critic might be a perfectionist—holding you to impossibly high standards—or just constantly echo your deepest insecurities. If you think of yourself in the second person a lot—”you’re not good enough,” “you’ll never succeed,” and so on—you might be under the thumb of your inner critic.

Worrying about the future: You might constantly think that you’ll inevitably say or do something to destroy your future prospects. Your inner critic might insist bad things are inevitable and that you should always stay in your comfort zone since you’re bound to mess things up if you color outside the lines. Heeding these judgmental demands will limit your ability to grow and enjoy all life has to offer.

Ways Meditation Helps Counter the Inner Critic

Slowing down and centering your mind can help you combat the critical inner voice in your head. Here are just five ways meditation can help you:

Empowers you with positive affirmations: Through certain types of meditation—like metta or the “lovingkindness practice”—you can use upbuilding and compassionate thoughts and mantras to anchor your sense of self-compassion and combat the worst urges of your inner critic. These affirmations help reorient your mind in a positive direction holistically.

Enables you to recognize impermanence: At the center of meditative practice is a recognition that the present moment is ever fleeting. As soon as you pay attention to one breath, your mind whisks away to some stray thought. The more you do this—always returning to the subject of meditative focus—the more you’ll see your mind divert to your inner critic’s viewpoint. It’ll become obvious as you continue to meditate that it’s just one point of view among many—and you can pay attention to its demands or ignore it just the same.

Encourages you to determine what’s of value: Not all self-criticism is bad. You should discard needlessly negative thoughts, but you can turn the inner critic into one of your best friends if you tame its voice. The equanimity brought on through meditation helps you see when a critical thought can be constructive or when you should ignore it for being untrue and damaging.

Gives you an opportunity to practice compassion: A mindfulness practice allows you to see yourself from the outside looking in—and this experience often brings about a sense of self-compassion. As you meditate, you can see and feel the damage the inner critic is doing to you from an objective standpoint. This can lead you to treat yourself more kindly and, as a result, treat others more kindly, too.

Helps you detach from your ego: Meditation allows you to reorient your sense of self-esteem away from the attachments of your ego. By distancing yourself from your ego (or “I, me, mine” thoughts) in general, you also distance yourself and even silence your inner critic. Although it might sound contradictory, thinking less about yourself, in general, can significantly boost self-confidence overall.

At its best, the inner critic is one voice among many—and you can take it or leave it.

If you can sift through these self-critical thoughts objectively and analytically, you can discover whether they’re valuable or merely detrimental and untrue.

The former can help you improve as a person; the latter will only bring you down.

At its worst, the inner critic can act as an intrusive, overpowering force—wracking you with unnecessary self-doubt and causing insecurity, depression, and anxiety.

Letting your inner critic run roughshod over you like this usually isn’t healthy.

Managing this facet of your inner dialogue can lead to positive personal growth possibilities, but left to its own devices, it can cause an overwhelming amount of negative self-talk and low self-esteem.

Source ⚜ More: Notes & References ⚜ Writing Resources PDFs

[kiashieart]

"It's okay. You can't always be the hero"

[demonic0angel]

Hi!!! I just wanted to tell you thank you!!! Like, every time you post a dpxdc something, I just go feral. I come here after screeching at one your posts like a pterodactyl....inna good way I mean! Your writing just makes days better and brings a smile on my face when I need it. So, thank you for feeding my gremlin brain and sustaining my dark soul!

Anyways! My ask is if the recently posted 'Tim thinks Danny is a vampire but cute' would get a 2nd part????

Thank you!!!!!!!!!😄😄😄😄

(Wahhh tysm! I’m glad you like my stuff :D)

Part 1, Part 3, Part 4

Tim leaned on a fist as he watched Danny doodle on his notebook instead of taking notes. He was drawing constellations and cartoony stars everywhere, his face dazed even through the camera screen. Tim stared at him, knowing that no matter what Jason said, he was still extremely suspicious and needed a careful eye.

A figure suddenly approached Danny, a tall boy with red hair, freckles, and a face that oddly looked similar to Danny’s. He gathered Danny’s stuff without another word, even as Danny jumped up with a start to protest.

Danny floundered. Tim began reading his lips with narrowed eyes. ‘What! Hey, what’re you doing?’

‘We have to go,’ the boy said tugging on Danny’s wrist. His familiarity with him made Tim bristle as he opened another tab to look into the school records and use his face recognition program to find out whoever the hell this was.

A girl with a bandanna pulling back her curly hair then strode towards Danny. She reached over to hold Danny’s hand and pulled him away from the other boy, both of them urgent. Danny asked her something, his face tilted away enough that Tim couldn’t decipher his words.

Hissing, Tim hurriedly changed perspectives so he could catch the tail of his words. When did Danny have so many friends?! After weeks of watching him, Danny hardly interacted with many people at all! These two people were ones that Tim had seen often lingering about, but how did they know Danny?! And why were they so close to him?!

‘— see something?’

The girl nodded hurriedly, her eyebrows furrowed. ‘Someone’s watching you. We need to get you to safety.’

Tim’s heart dropped into his feet. He stood up from his seat to focus as he clicked on his mouse, trying to figure out what was happening. Were they onto him? But how? His cameras were the state of the art in tech and none of it should’ve been detectable!

Unless they were all vampires…? Or maybe his hypothesis was wrong and Danny was even worse than a bloodsucking creature.

In the cameras, Danny froze. Then he turned and all three of them looked at the camera that Tim had chosen to watch them, making direct eye contact with Tim behind the screen.

In an instant, Tim self destructed all of his cameras, listening devices and trackers (which honestly hadn’t worked at all since he attached them to various belongings of Danny.)

He was sweating as he erased all of his tracks expertly. When he was done, he cursed. All of his tech was destroyed completely and none of it could be traced back to him, but now he didn’t have a way to observe Danny.

He sighed and drew a hand through his hair. He picked up his phone and gave a call.

“Hey, Steph? Can you find a way for me to get into Gotham University right now?”

[chunksworld]

Double Fantasy

NewJeans Minji x Male Reader | (Tags: Smut)

A/N: Apologies for the long hiatus, ya boi was busy with life. Also, thank you @kaedespicelatte as always for beta reading. ————————

“My room. I’m giving you 15 minutes or we’re never doing this again.”

Kim Minji be damned.

You hate how every ounce of self-respect you have flies out of the window when it comes to her, as if you’re nothing but an outlet for her carnal desires (as she was to you). And perhaps you are—maybe it was just part of your delusion to think that she perceives you differently than the hundreds of men that shamelessly ogle her. That she views you more than just that guy that fucks her so good she struggles to keep that mouth of hers shut. But who are you to complain? Every encounter with her leaves you starstruck, wanting for more, tongue tied—as if she commands an unquantifiable amount of gravity that leaves you speechless literally and figuratively. As much as your brain is telling you that she’s dangerous, that everything that’s happening between the two of you can jeopardize everything you’ve worked so hard for, it’s the thrill that keeps you coming back time and time again.

I mean who would’ve thought that the two top students on campus would be engaging in such unholy acts? Not when everyone (your professors included) think of you two as the embodiment of the values that this very institution was established upon. The beacons of hope that would serve as inspirations for the rest of your peers, that through hard work they can attain the level of success that you two have. That couldn’t be any more farther than the truth however. Certainly your after school hookups with her inside empty classrooms, behind the bleachers, and inside the gym showers would beg to differ. But it’s not like you have any morals, that disappeared eons ago when you found yourself down this treacherous path of self-destruction in an attempt to alleviate the stress that comes with such expectations and responsibilities.

On the surface their perception of you two is true; students that constantly receive top marks in every subject and find themselves involved in as many activities and clubs as possible. Racking up awards was just second nature, as you would always receive the highest recognition much like she did over the years. It was only natural for a rivalry to spark between you and her; a byproduct of your competitiveness and your desire to come out on top. It was friendly at first, you would congratulate each other and encourage the other to do better next time. But it soon became ugly, the once wholesome banter turning into horrifying insults that you wouldn’t even think to come out of your mouth—needless to say you both became jealous of each other, of how successful the other one became.

You could say it was a petty affair, one that was exacerbated by the fact that everyone was pressuring you two to continuously be the best—a mental strain that proved to be too much. It was something that only happened behind closed doors though, everyone still thought you had an amicable relationship with her when everything was actually already falling apart. Yelling and screaming and arguing, truly an ugly sight. You would often talk about how you couldn’t stand how condescending she was towards you every time you made a mistake and she in turn would talk about how much she hates your ego. But it also involved even the smallest of things including how you thought her boyfriend was a dick because she would rarely see him (she claimed he was busy all the time but you knew better).

And with two extremely combustible elements in constant interaction with one another, an explosion was bound to occur. After months and months of arguing, it finally happened. It was midterms week and you two were extremely stressed (it didn’t help that you were only getting on average two to three hours of sleep and consuming an unhealthy amount of energy drinks). Oh, and that dick of a boyfriend she had broke up with her. She was inconsolable to say the least— but when you brought up how much you didn’t like him and blamed her for dating him in the first place like the asshole you were, that's when things took a turn. You know you fucked up, that it was a line crossed and that such words should have never been uttered. But instead of receiving a resounding slap on the face, you found yourself kissing her. 

Or rather, Minji kissing you. And any sane person would react by trying to pull away in shock but you couldn’t find yourself doing it. Perhaps this was something that was bound to happen. All of those arguing and bickering, maybe it was just a ruse. The urgency, the passion, the look of desperation in her eyes; they told the story. Maybe it was the caffeine, maybe it was the adrenaline, maybe it was something more. Whatever it is, she needed you as much as you needed her. She was coming off a terrible breakup and you, well—you would be lying to yourself if you said that you didn’t find her attractive because who didn’t? There’s a reason why she’s rejected at least half of the male students, and you definitely don’t miss the way some of them would glare at you because of how suspiciously close you were to her. 

In that aspect, a part of you considers this a small victory; especially when she grabs you by the collar and pulls you in deeper, as if the thought of letting you go would be the end of her. It was intense and as much as your senses were firing from all cylinders, your brain was telling you that this wasn’t right. You were supposed to hate her, she was your mortal enemy. What would everyone think? That the two top students were hooking up with—close the fucking door before I change my mind. Right. Every rationale you may have had was gone in an instant. The prospect of a classmate, a member of the maintenance crew, or worse—a staff potentially catching the two of you never crossed your mind. Not when you had her bent over the desk at one point screaming you’re fucking me so good and don’t stop while you rearrange her guts. Or when you had her pinned against the wall and pumped her so full of cum that she finally gave you her number after because she wanted you two to do it all over again.

Did the room reek of sex? Sure. That’s why she’s made it a habit to bring a bottle of air freshener to mask the scent during your subsequent “study sessions.” And were people starting to notice how you two would frequently stay up late despite not always having a busy workload? Definitely. But you could care less. In fact, nothing else matters. You were addicted to her in more ways than one, not romantically however. That was something she made abundantly clear the day after—clearly she was one to establish boundaries which you respected. Yet here you are, frantically putting on some nice clothes and making yourself smell nice with that twenty dollar bottle of perfume that she hates. Fuck it, why even bother? Your clothes will be thrown to God knows where the moment you enter her place anyways. At least put on a face mask, especially since you’ll be sneaking your way to her dorm once again and you don’t want another close encounter with the security guard.

Fortunately there wasn’t any problem, your disguise actually worked this time around but you still have to be cautious. It’s a quick elevator ride yet it takes forever, maybe it’s because you two haven’t had sex in the past two weeks and you’re just dying to get a taste of her again, to feel her irresistible body against yours. Look around before knocking on the door three times and fortunately you didn’t have to wait any longer. Minji hastily pulls you inside and grabs you by your hoodie for a kiss—immediately you get a taste of her favorite cinnamon lip balm. Her strength (which still surprises you to this day) forces you to move backwards and you find your back pressed against her door. Hands roam each other’s bodies and you groan as you feel her fingers cup your bulge. Fuck, why are you so hard already? 

You’re not one to just let her do what she wants so you avoid her chasing lips to plant yours on her neck, biting and nipping on her smooth skin while your own fingers creep underneath her shirt. “D-Don’t fucking mark me. I—shit—I’ve got a presentation tomorrow.” Minji finally speaks and you would’ve gladly granted her wish but with the way she’s leaning her head back, it didn’t seem like her words were matching her actions. Much more so when you grab on the hem of that same shirt and pull it up and she willfully raises her arms so you can remove it. And before you even get the opportunity to appreciate her body, your sweatpants are already being pulled down. Help her out by kicking that obstructive garment away; in fact you end up removing your hoodie as well which only leaves you with your boxers on and it barely conceals your raging desire for her. 

“This is your fault. Your fault for making me wait so damn long.” You don’t miss the way she bites her lips at the sight of your bulge, even as you make your way further down with your mouth and proceed to mark her collarbones and her cleavage. Her deft fingers continue to distract you however, pulling your boxers down and wrapping her cold digits around your throbbing and pulsating cock. The effect on you is immediate as you can do nothing but lean your head back and groan shamelessly. Minji smirks, especially because this is one of the only few times she has the upper hand on you; when you’re just putty in her arms and rendered breathless by her actions. It gets even worse when she slowly begins to pump you, drawing more precum out of your tip with how badly you just want to ravage her. 

“You poor thing.” You can feel her hot breath against your ear, sending more shivers down your spine as she’s decided that it’s now her turn to leave marks on you. It’s apparent that Kim Minji is just as possessive as you, even though neither one of you wants to reveal your dirty little secret to everyone. “Guess you couldn’t last that long without me, huh? Were those pictures I sent not enough?” Of course they weren’t, no amount of thirst pics of her in her underwear can satiate your endless lust towards her. Nothing can replace her hands, the way she can just work you to submission and make you so impatient. “I can’t blame you.” Her teeth sink into your jugular like a vampire. “I’ve been thinking about how much I want you to rail me into the bed, to make me moan so fucking load, to make me choke on your cock. Will you do all of that for me?”

You’re ashamed by how much that turned you on, as if a switch has been flipped inside you. You don’t miss a beat and lift her up by her waist which makes her squeal; her legs wrap around you while you carry her towards her bed. No more foreplay, you almost throw her onto the bed before yanking her shorts and her panties in the process. They’re discarded along with the rest of your clothing somewhere in the room. Her bra follows suit as well—you can’t believe she’s had it on for this long. “Fuck, you don’t know how much I want to put a load in you. Until you’re filled with so much cum that all you can think about is my cock.” You spread her long legs open and it’s clear that everything she said is true; her clit is puffed and her inner thighs are already drenched with her juices. 

Kneel in front of her and carefully position your length inside her. “Gonna fuck you now.” Through gritted teeth, Minji nods; her fingers gripping your biceps while her legs are already pulling you in. You sink into her further and further, drinking her moans and whispered curses until you bottom out inside her. She still feels so good, so  tight, so warm. You have to silence her mouth with a kiss because her moans are increasing in volume as you gradually increase her pace. “So, so fucking good. You’re gonna drain me dry.” Feel her nails digging into your shoulders and back, you’re definitely going to feel the sting of the scratches she’s leaving tomorrow morning but that’s not your concern for now. A bite of your bottom lip further confirms that she’s in an equal state of euphoria and you respond by continuing to fuck her with the same pace and intensity.

You’re careful not to make the bed creak but that’s fortunately an art that you’ve already mastered given the circumstances. But even with her luscious thighs wrapped around you, it’s not enough to have her drunk on your cock, you want her to beg for it like her life depends on it. You pause for a brief moment much to her verbal disappointment before pressing her legs against her chest to effectively fuck her in mating press. You know it’s her favorite position because an uncharacteristically loud moan escapes her mouth the moment you resume your fucking, your fingers gripping the bedsheet for support. “F-Fuck! Please, keep fucking me. So—damn—big!” You’re going to have to kiss her again because she’s slowly losing her grip on her surroundings, only focused on how much you’re pounding her into the bed.

“This is what you wanted, right? I bet not even your toys can fuck you this deep.” Minji doesn’t answer but her body responds for her; a particularly deep thrust has her clinging on to you for dear life. Her breasts pressing up against you and followed by the rest of her body. Bury your face on the crook of her neck, inhaling her addicting scent as you can feel her tightening ever so slightly around your cock. It’s becoming more of an effort to thrust inside her now, especially when you’re fucking her balls deep with every motion of your hips. Only broken sentences and curses are leaving her mouth at this very moment, along with shameless moans of your name as if she’s not afraid to reveal to everyone just how much the model student is getting dicked down by her fellow model student.

Maybe she isn’t. Maybe that’s part of the thrill after all, the aspect of getting caught. But that’s not your worry at this moment; not when that said model student is beginning to tighten even more and her breathing is becoming more hurried. You pull away to look at her facial expression and it’s painted with nothing but lust. The way her face is misted with sweat, her eyes closed, and her mouth open. It’s clear that her orgasm is just right around the corner. “C-Coming! I’m so fucking close, don’t you dare fucking stop.” You don’t care that your abs are burning, that’s what those 7 AM workouts in the gym are for. It’s for moments like these, when her nails are damn near close to breaking your skin and tears are starting to well on her eyes. It then becomes your goal to break her, like you always do during these sessions.

And it’s during another particularly deep thrust that her orgasm hits her like lightning, her pussy becoming unimaginably tight as if she wants you to join her in her euphoria as well. She’s almost crying, her body twitching uncontrollably as you pin her down to the bed. Tears eventually do fall due to the overwhelming pleasure, that makeup that you’re only noticing now is completely destroyed. Her juices begin to soak your length and the sheets underneath. She’s biting her lips so hard that it’s starting to bleed, get rid of the blood by giving her open-mouthed kisses. But you’re so focused on helping her come down from her high that you don’t realize that you’re about to explode as well, Perhaps you might, because you’re starting to throb madly as you continue to fuck her through her powerful orgasm. 

You spread her legs as far as you can, pistoning into her with no abandon. More of her juices stream out and you’re almost apologetic because of the mess that she’s going to have to clean up. But it’s really hard to focus on anything else when her pussy is still pulsating, continuing to urge you to join her in her orgasm. “Need your cum inside me, don’t you dare pull out.” It’s not like you had any intentions to in the first place, not when her suffocating warmth is begging to drain your balls for everything it has. The tension is building, rising, culminating—one animalistic growl after you bottom out and you’re pumping ropes and ropes of semen deep inside her. It floods her walls, it overflows, and you just can’t stop pushing it as deep inside her as possible. To make sure that her womb is completely filled with your cum and nothing else. It’s downright euphoric, the way her name leaves your lips like it’s a mantra. The way all of it triggers a smaller, second orgasm from her—truly wringing you dry.

It takes minutes for your movement to come to a halt, and by then your orgasm has completely subsided and so has hers. You feel her arms pull you in for a kiss, a much slower and passionate one compared to earlier. As if she’s saying thanks, because her voice is probably already gone. Or perhaps she’s just preserving her energy because if there’s anything you know about Minji, it’s that one round is not enough for her. If that’s the case then you better get a quick rest. Pull out of her and watch your excess semen drip out of her and down to her thighs. It’s truly a sight that you’ll never get tired of time and time again. Even more so when she takes a finger and takes a sample of your combined juices. It doesn’t take too long for your cock to become fully erect once again despite your orgasm just mere minutes ago.

There’s no time to contemplate though as Minji saves you the trouble because the next thing you know her perfectly shaped ass is raised and facing you, her arms bracing herself on the bed as she clearly shows you what she wants. “Need you to cum in me again, can you do that for me?” There’s no more time to waste, take a glance at the bedside clock and it’s already way past midnight—any noise at this hour would further alert people. You quickly kneel behind her, positioning your cock once again inside her pussy but this time in a much swifter manner. But despite all of the lubrication she’s so much tighter in this position. Grab on her ass for support and leverage as you begin to thrust, it’s a sight to behold that is her curves and back covered with sweat and her hair becoming a disheveled mess. 

She’s much more silent this time, thanks to the fact that her moans are being muffled by the pillows. This slow tempo also gives you time to recover, though it’s clear that she wants you to be rough with her once again with the way she’s moving her hips in a back and forth motion. Fine, if that’s what she wants then that’s what she gets. Just thirty seconds is all you need to recover, especially when you’ve got that heavenly view in front of you. You grab her by the arms and pull her upright until her back is pressed against your chest, your hands palming her breasts as you suddenly increase your pace. It’s your favorite position because not only is her body pressed against yours but you can view everything about her up close—her ruined mascara, her swollen lip, the dried tears on her face. 

Your fingers slowly creep up to her neck as you fuck her with all of your remaining strength, quieting her with more kisses—also because you just love kissing the hell out of her due to how irresistible and soft her lips are. She might’ve had another orgasm already but you’re too far gone, too caught up in chasing your own that you don’t notice. Either way, it only takes ten minutes this time for you to unload whatever remaining load you had (which is surprisingly a lot considering that when you pull out, a copious amount of semen is dripping out of her now swollen pussy once again). Now you’re truly spent, crashing on her twin sized bed that can barely fit the two of you so you always end up cuddling post sex. And as crazy as it sounds, this is the part of this whole ordeal that you’re oh-so-afraid of. Will she hear how quickly your heart beats when her head is resting on it? Will she find out that you’re slowly starting to wish that there was more between you two? Despite the fact that it’s an incredibly terrible idea that could have major implications in your future?

“Take me out to dinner first.” Minji is the first one to break the silence and the words that come out of her mouth completely terrifies you—it almost makes you jump out of the bed.

“What?”

“I’m not stupid.” Minji looks up to you, then places a gentle kiss on the hickey she left on your neck. “We’ve been hooking up for five months and you’re telling me there’s no way you haven’t fallen in love with me yet?”

Maybe you have.

Then you remember how angry you felt when her boyfriend broke up with her and you couldn’t do anything about it; you just wanted to barge inside her room and hold her in your arms and apologize for being such a dick and you couldn’t. You wanted to tell her that she deserves better because she truly does, but whether it was you that deserved to take that place in her heart you didn’t know. You were mortified at the thought of your relationship only remaining at such a stage—even though she made it crystal clear that she didn’t want anything to develop between you two. But it’s all in the past now—which begs the question: have you truly fallen in love with her? It only takes one look at those eyes and the way her lips curl upwards and how she fits so perfectly in your arms and how you wish you could be with her forever and how it all completely fucks up your equilibrium.

Yeah.

Of course you have.

[darkroom-fanzine]

[And the curtain opens...!]

[Image Description: a black and white banner gif showing Siffrin from In Stars And Time as he wanders through the third floor of the House. He is posed in the center of the image, faced to his left (viewer's right) as if moving in that direction. Behind him are four trailing repetitions of his image, each one losing opacity as they get further away, with a final fifth one having its values inverted, appearing instead as Mal Du Pays. Floating around them are six polaroid photographs, the first covering up the right half of Siffrin's face, showing instead a values inversion of it within its borders, their expression blank. Beyond that in order from closest to Siffrin to farthest away, the polaroids show Mirabelle, Isabeau, Odile, Bonnie, and one that is indistinguishable, all members of the party with their faces distorted out, while the last one is distorted beyond a potential for recognition. On the other side of Siffrin, to his left, is a flash-like burst evocative of a camera flash or a star (much like Loop's head), partially hidden over by Siffrin's shadow. Around the brick walls in the background and partially growing over the bottom left of the foreground can be seen the King's hair, and in the bottom right is text reading: "Darkroom | an ISAT Fanzine". The entire thing has been animated to look as if the lines around Siffrin, their shadows, and all the distortions over the polaroids are boiling, while light shines off from around the flash/star. End ID.]

[Hello, stardust~! How can I help you on this wonderful new loop?]

Welcome, everyone! This is the blog for the upcoming project, "Darkroom: an ISAT Fanzine". We are excited to finally announce our beginnings, and hope you will stick around to see what it is we have to offer!

Firstly, let us introduce ourselves. The mod team for this fanzine comprises of myself (@actingwithportals), as well as @voidedtea, @publiccmenace, @astrangeavenue, @sundimus, and @plasticteabag. Between the six of us, we have experience as leads, co-leads, moderators, and contributors on four individual fanzine projects, and are all excited to begin work on something new!

Now, let's get to the fun part, shall we?

[Darkroom: Negative Space, Long Exposure, Afterimage.]

The theming for this fanzine centers around the idea of distortions, how they obscure what we see and perceive, and how they can bring to light an entirely new perspective hidden behind the more easily comprehensible. In Stars And Time shows us throughout Siffrin's loops how the order of a carefully curated script can bring about a chaotic mental state, and how the chaotic breaking down of these self-imposed walls can bring about the order of accepting vulnerability.

Change is often destruction, and in the midst of that destruction can be found something beautiful, something to live for. This is the idea we hope to present through this fanzine.

[Fanzine Content.]

The Darkroom Fanzine will be a multi-media culmination of fanworks created by fans, for fans, and available for free download on Itch.io. Creations can vary anywhere from art, to writing, to music, to essays, to crafts, to whatever you can think of that you would like to see included in this project!

The only restrictions we will be enforcing is content that lies outside of the existing rating for the game, meaning no 18+ subject material.

However new you are to your Craft—whether it be writing, art, edits, collages, or anything beyond—your skills are welcomed here. From beginners to professionals, all are encouraged to apply! Once we hit an internally agreed upper limit of participants, we will lock the sign-up form should that limit be reached before the end date of the sign-ups occurs.

[Interest Checks.]

To kick this off, we are opening an interest check form to gauge interest for this project. The form will remain open from January 23rd through February 22nd, upon which the following day (February 23rd) the sign-up form will go live.

[Curtain Call.]

Thank you all for taking the time to read this far, and if you have any further questions/inquiries/concerns about this project, our askbox is open! Relatedly, you can also shoot us an email at darkroom.fanzine@gmail.com.

INTEREST CHECK FORM HERE.

[See you under the Favor Tree soon, stardust~ ✨]

[estrellogy]

My First Astro Note 🤍

Natal Chart

- MC is who you want to become in relation to others’ recognition and approval. NN is who your soul wants to be independent of others. In spiritual terms, it can be outer manifestations versus inner knowing.

- MC is what you bring into the physical world. It is the bridge between heaven and earth, the material and non-material. That’s why it’s often associated with career and public image. Self-mastery and reaching your full potential.

- NN is where your soul will learn to recognize itself the most:

For example, NN in 8th house will learn about itself the most through surrendering to another. To share instead of possess. To dissolve the self into someone else and realize the oneness of everything.

NN in 2nd house may learn about itself through possessing and then letting go. To achieve and then realize that nothing is permanent. All one ever possesses is who they are at the core.

———————————————————————————

- When evaluating attractiveness, I often look to the 2nd house more than the first. The first is super important of course! But the 2nd house is like the accessories and adornments. The first house is the base outfit and the 2nd is all the extra details that make the first house stand out even more.

Maybe it’s my Virgo Venus or something, but beauty to me lies in the details. Memorable beauty is not always in your face. It’s subtle and it makes you wonder about it. That’s why the deeper layer of the 2nd house can be so indicative of charm that goes beyond the physical.

With that being said, I think Venus and Pluto in 2nd house are often found in very attractive people, even when they’re not conventionally good-looking.

Venus in 2nd house is enchanting, really. They are sensual and deeply connected to their physical body and senses. They enhance whatever experience you’re having. If you’re eating a meal, they know what to add to bring out the flavors even more. They know what fragrance to use for what purpose. They just understand how things visually work together. And their voice is sweet and coy and irresistible. They weave themselves into your senses to the point where you begin to think about them whenever you experience pleasure.

Pluto in 2nd is magnetic. It is the hidden charge in someone’s energy that you can’t physically pinpoint. It is in their voice, the slight strain that makes you wonder what they’re holding back. It’s the slight force of power wanting to dominate. It is the subtle, Taurus-infused energy of elegance and authority. Being around them make you want to submit without them needing to exert power or control. You just want to because they seem so solid and stable. But it’s Pluto so they’re also destructive and dangerous. But human nature always seems to yearn for what is dark and painful but pleasurable.

[tearcynical]

Crosswire Introductory Post!

What would happen if Cross became an error? This is the answer to that question! After XGaster's continuous resets, somewhere along the way Cross's code split into pieces, leading to the majority of those pieces ending up somewhere in a far off outcode. Becoming the way he is now, his past memories were weathered and faded with time. Instead of dwelling on figuring out his past and rediscovering who he was, he's set on who he's going to become, who he wants to be. Eyes on the future, Crosswire joins The Omega Timeline to better the futures of others, restoring code to dwindling aus, while simultaneously protecting them from those who'd wish them harm.

His life within the timeline he calls home is unfortunate at best. Crosswire puts in tremendous effort for those around him, yet receives less in turn due to the stereotypical view of errors and their variants. Working hard he receives recognition for his duty - but little for his character, and other interests. He knows he wants good for his self proclaimed family and friends, but hardly knows what to make of himself past that. With the lack of memories and lapses of that already poor memory, Crosswire fears he's going to lose what little he already has.

Duty calls him though, and that job of his leads him to discover the destructive entity that is Ethernet. Stopping and constantly thwarting Ethernet's plans in a scramble to help those in need, Crosswire can't help but to feel a sense of familiarity around the other glitch. His memory feels more secure near him, he's sworn he's seen a face like his before, so on and so forth. Developing an attachment to his enemy, he finds peace with their regular battles and violent interactions. Ethernet successfully becomes the one constant in his life, the one person who's upfront and honest with him (no matter how aggressive).

Crosswire can come across as mean, and he's definitely sassy, though underneath his pricklier exterior lies a squishy, loveable inside. Protecting that inside is a hardened, nonchalant (for lack of a better word) shell. He exhibits great patience and he's extremely considerate, although once you tread too far across his boiling point he has a fiery, hard to quell temper. Most of his rage, discomfort, and pointentally other negative emotions are held on his inside, bottled and kept from ever poking their head. He fears his already difficult to enjoy character would be worse off if he expressed himself to the fullest. He cares deeply for those around him regardless of if they do for him, and he sees the better sides of things with an almost foolish optimism. He's strong-willed, both in behaviour and form, and he's an even stronger lover.

- Crosswire's strings don't come from his eyes, but instead come from his cheeks. He peels them from his skull in an almost painful manner, like heated rubber pried from a road. His strings are stronger, harder to snap or break, more like wire than thread.

- Cross's fear of cows has translated weirdly through Crosswire's broken memory. Instead of being terrified of simple farm animals, he's deathly scared of Mammoths.

- Crosswire, when he's not busy with his work, spends his time creating comics. They're nothing special, as his creative abilities are nowhere near as good as others, but he enjoys the process of storytelling and drawing. Excuse his many plotholes, stereotypically drawn anime segments, and overpowered characters, and you might enjoy them.

- Crosswire is capable of destroying Aus much like his counterpart, although he's modified that violent technique and turned it into something constructive.

( Ethernet belongs to @labryveinth )

[two-stars]

fuck it. I’m analyzing Dr Ratio’s eidolons.

I interpret eidolons as different facets of a persons character, tying back into their journey in life. (Also this shit loooong so I’m putting it under cut)

1. Pride Comes Before a Fall: this phrase originates from the Bible (proverbs 16:18), which talk of how the sin of pride will eventually lead to destruction, and telling one to practice humility*. To me, this phrase refers possibly to Ratio’s desire to be noticed by Nous. His pride originating from his previous achievements, lauded and touted as a prodigy from a young age (this is, of course, speculation because MIHOYO WONT GIVE ME RATIO LOOREEE). Through this pride, we can obviously see what happens next: he is never noticed by Nous, this is his fall. Either in the eyes of others, or himself (as it is never outright stated that Ratio sought the gaze of Nous, but I subscribe heavily to this line of thinking, due to his voiceline when you max level him: “If this day I have not gained the recognition of Nous, it stands to reason I never will at any point in the future”).

2. The Divine is In the Details: This is an idiom, although it’s more commonly said as “God is in the details”. This phrase is meant to emphasize the importance of the smaller, overlooked details which make up the whole. This is used most often in art and architecture, but can be applied to many other things. I connect this to Ratio’s meticulous nature as a scholar and researcher, but I also draw lines to his 1st eidolon. After Ratio is rejected by the higher powers, he turns instead to the “insignificant” common people, realizing their importance— we know that Ratio values all life, even one’s “marked by failure”, which others may overlook. Real divinity is not the God, but rather the beauty of humanity’s falls and successes.

3. Know Thyself: This was a proverb written upon the temple of Apollo, in Delphi, Ancient Greece. This has many meanings, from knowing your limits (either as one’s place in the universe, or your own mortality), to the broader interpretation by Plato as knowing your soul, and a a common theme of through studying the self could one know the universe. All of these relate heavily to Ratio, considering his tenets of self-improvement. He also references in his line when he finds an enemy target, “You learn to know yourself before your enemy.” (Which is ALSO a quote from Sun Tzu’s The Art of War.) I think this one is pretty self explanatory as a continuation to the previous Eidolons, after his rejection, he seeks to reevaluate (relearn) himself and his stance in life.

4. Ignorance Is Blight: This represents Ratio’s goal to eradicate ignorance and stupidity across the universe, but it is also a inverse on the popular idiom “ignorance is bliss”. This idiom is basically everything Ratio stands against, he will know and say the truth unfiltered, even if it is uncomfortable. I also see this as Ratio finally discovering his calling as a teacher.

5. Sic Itur Ad Astra*: Written in the Aeneid, meaning “thus one journeys to the stars”. It has merged over time with another phrase in the Aeneid, “opta ardua pennis astra sequi” (meaning: desire to pursue the difficult-to-reach stars) becoming the common encouragement, “Reach for the stars.” We know Ratio never settles for doing anything in halves, and as a teacher, he constantly pushes others and himself to reach for high goals. Although his methods can be harsh, it is ultimately through strife (“— it is only in moments on solitude and despair, when help is absent, that fools grasp how to pick themselves up.”), that he seeks to unlock the potential of every person. This is most obviously seen in the Trailblazer Continuance quest: Crown of Mundane and Divine where he leverages the situation to try and topple the blind worship of the Genius Society on the space station.

6. Vincit Omnia Veritas: Meaning: Truth conquers all things. Surface level, this one is pretty straightforward too, Ratio values truth highly, and to him, it is the antithesis to ignorance, and therefore knowledge. As his Ultimate voiceline goes, he says, “Knowledge is the measure of all things. It reveals truth, and falsehood.” What I want to focus on however, is his pose in the eidolon. It is the exact same pose as Michelangelo’s David statue. This depiction is of David before his famous battle with Goliath. In this eidolon, Ratio is the figure David, who was also known as a symbol of the protection of civil liberties. And in by interpretation, Goliath is the stupidity he wants to eradicate. Just as truth conquers all things, Veritas will conquer all ignorance.

*— I also think this is why he consistently downplays himself and avoids the spotlight (calling himself a supporting character).

*— fun fact, this phrase is also used as the motto of Cambridge University, very fitting.

[ilmarin]

Sauron’s single tear when he killed Celebrimbor genuinely gives me so much brainrot because it feels like a self recognition through the other moment where whatever is left of Mairon within him shines through. He and Celebrimbor were both talented and ambitious smiths and they both got seduced with power by a more powerful, fallen Ainu, much to their undoing, didn’t they? They are such mirror images. Maybe Sauron’s tears are selfish ones of self pity from losing Celebrimbor as a tool, but I like to think deep down a part of him also mourns that Celebrimbor broke out of the bonds Sauron laid on him, and resisted to the end, and ultimately his fëa goes to back to Valinor for healing. It’s what Sauron himself could have been. But what has become of Mairon now? He can never go back; and for a while he had a peer of sorts in Celebrimbor, a companion and partner—but now he’s lost him too, at the hands of his own destructive ambition.

[bijoutarot]

Your Next Twin Flame Connection ✨

Pick an Image ✨

🌟 Ready to uncover the magic of your next twin flame connection? The cards have spoken, and the universe is sending you a clear message! This reading will guide you toward what’s ahead in your twin flame journey. Let’s explore what energies are coming your way. 💫

🔮 Reading Image 1: The Lovers 🔮

Soul-Aligned Union

The Lovers card is a powerful symbol of unity, deep connection, and choice. When it comes to your next twin flame, this will be a relationship that feels destined. From the moment you meet, you’ll sense an undeniable pull, as though you’ve known each other for lifetimes. This connection will challenge you to look inward and embrace your authentic self, but it will also offer profound love and mutual respect. The path to union may involve important choices—will you let fear or trust guide you? Expect passion, but also emotional and spiritual growth. 💖

✨ Message: You and your twin flame are two halves of a greater whole, coming together to create something powerful. Trust the bond, and let it unfold naturally.

🔮 Reading Image 2: The Tower 🔮

Sudden Change and Awakening

The Tower is a card of disruption, but it’s also a catalyst for transformation. When it comes to your twin flame, this connection will not be like any other. It might arrive when you least expect it, shaking up your life in ways that feel uncomfortable at first. But don’t be afraid—this upheaval is exactly what you need. It’s clearing away old beliefs, toxic patterns, and any illusions you’ve held about love, allowing you both to rebuild from a place of truth. The rawness and intensity of this connection will force both of you to confront deep fears, but in doing so, you’ll reach a deeper level of intimacy and understanding. ⚡

✨ Message: Trust the process, even if it seems chaotic at first. Sometimes destruction is necessary for growth. Your twin flame will be the one who helps you tear down walls to make space for true love.

🔮 Reading Image 3: The High Priestess 🔮

Intuition and Mystical Connection

The High Priestess is the guardian of intuition, secrets, and divine wisdom. When you meet your twin flame, this connection will be deeply intuitive, as though you’re both reading each other’s souls. You may feel an instant recognition—a sense of déjà vu, as if you’ve known them forever. The relationship will not always be obvious, and there may be periods of silence or mystery where you must rely on your inner knowing. There’s a sense of sacredness to this union, one that can’t always be explained logically. Trust what you feel in your heart, even if the external world doesn’t yet reflect it. 🌙

✨ Message: Listen to your intuition—it will guide you through the mysteries of this connection. Your twin flame will bring a sense of magic and spiritual depth into your life.

🔮 Reading Image 4: The Star 🔮

Hope, Healing, and Renewal

The Star is a card of hope, healing, and divine guidance. This card suggests that your twin flame connection will be a source of incredible emotional healing. When you meet them, you’ll feel as though a weight has been lifted from your soul. Both of you will bring light to each other’s darkness, healing old wounds and helping one another rediscover hope. This union is not just about romance—it’s about spiritual renewal, opening your hearts to the possibility of a new beginning. The Star promises that this connection will inspire you to be your best self and encourage you both to dream big and follow your soul’s true path. ✨

✨ Message: This connection is a gift from the universe. It’s about renewal, healing, and the power of unconditional love. You’ll feel like a better version of yourself, simply by being in each other’s presence.

🌙 Final Message:

Your next twin flame connection is here to awaken you, challenge you, and help you heal. While it may not always be smooth, it will be deeply transformative. Trust the journey, trust the love, and most importantly—trust yourself. 💫

💌 Share your thoughts below! Does this reading resonate with you? What part of your twin flame journey are you currently experiencing? ✨🌙

[taleeater]

Fragile Part 7

Sorry for the wait! It was hard to focus while writing this chapter, so I might be editing it for mistakes here and there. I hope you like it! :] <3

Generation: Bayverse TMNT

Tmnt x Reader Fanfic

Pronouns: Gender Neutral (except ‘dudette’, 'miss', and ‘princess’)

Warnings: injury, broken limbs, violence, drowning, not proof read

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

You were laying dazed on the cold metal floor. In too much pain to focus on anything else besides breathing. You heard a commotion, voices muffled through the thick glass. At least inside this tube they couldn’t touch you anymore. Your mind strayed to the turtles. You weren’t able to save them. You weren’t able to do anything. You just hope they can somehow get away safely. That April and Casey can somehow save them.

“I won’t ask again…. Where’s (y/n).” Leo growled. He grit his teeth as he lowered his stance, ready to strike.

Baxter Stockman was quickly typing commands into the program on his computer. Karai stepped in front of him and drew her katana.

“Out of your reach, Turtles.” 

“Aaaaand, there!” Stockman hit one last key on this computer and a red light started to flash on the tank, bringing the turtle’s attention to the crumpled form inside the glass. At the same time a multitude of files and programs started closing on the screen one after another, Stockman’s signature digital self-destruct program. Baxter stepped away from his computer and lifted his arms up triumphantly.

The sound of rattling pipes overhead catches your attention. 

“Ha! You’re too late, Turtles. For years, the Foot Clan has sought out the means to fight you mutants on equal footing. And now, we have our secret weapon! An endless supply of pure mutagen!!!” 

You heard a loud beeping sound, then a click, and the squeak of metal.

A gush of icy water pours down on you from above. The sudden cold shocks you and marginally distracts you from the pain. You pull yourself to the edge of the glass away from the heavy stream of water coming down from above, slowly starting to fill the base. You take a shaky deep breath and bang a fist on the glass. No use. Dizzy and numb, you look outside the tank for someone, something, anything that might help you. That’s when you see them.

And with dawning horror, they see you.

“Guys….?” You press your wet hand up against the glass. They’re here! They’re safe!!!

“(Y/n)....? (Y/N)!!!!” Leo shouts and lunges towards the tank. He tries to rush up to the glass but Rocksteady blocks his path. There’s blood on your cheek, and even a good distance away he can tell you’re in bad shape. 

“OUT OF OUR WAY!” Raph roared at Bebop and Rocksteady, crossing his sai in preparation for a fight.

“Uuuh hey guys? Why is (y/n) in a giant fish bowl…?” Mikey asked, nunchucks at the ready.

“They ain’t comin’ out anytime soon, short stack.” Bebop said with an evil grin. 

“You turtles totally fell for our trap!” Rocksteady chuckled.

Donnie immediately noticed the computer hooked up to the tank’s controls. He tried to subtly sneak past Bebop to get to Stockman but Karai stepped forward and blocked his path.

Karai pointed her sword at Donnie. “The Foot will be unstoppable.”

“And I will FINALLY get the recognition I deserve, for single-handedly creating an entire race of superhumans that will rule over the city!!!” 

“You’re crazy!! You don’t even know what kind of side effects that mutation will have on regular humans!” Donnie activated the electricity at the end of his bo staff, ready to fight Karai to get to Stockman. 

“I do have to thank you turtles for activating their mutant gene. Without your help, none of this would be possible!” Stockman’s laugh echoed through the large room. He waltz over to the canister filling up with the distilled mutagen from your blood. “We originally got (y/n) by a…. foreseeable mistake. But to our surprise, they survived where others had failed. And yet- their results were incomplete. Their animal DNA wasn’t materializing no matter what we did to them. So we came back to New York, where the population could supply us with countless more test subjects.” Baxter said cheerfully, popping the lid off the canister. “But now that we have the results we wanted, we have no need of them! We can preserve (y/n)’s body in a special chemical compound that will put them into a permanent hibernation. No need to worry, their body will be harnessed for science!” Stockman’s laugh was deep and evil, and to everyone’s shock-

He dumped the canister of mutagen over his own head.

Karai lept back out of the trajectory of the splash. Baxter’s laugh increased in volume as he began to morph and change. His head and eyes grew large, his body shrank, little papery wings sprouted from his back, and he mutated into a giant mutant fly. 

Bebop and Rocksteady were stunned by the transformation. “Eeeeewwww… he turned into a bug?” Bebop whined.

“Nasty!” Rocksteady shook his head. Neither of them were paying attention to the turtles so Raph and Donnie covered for Leo and Mikey to make a break for the tank you were in. By now it had filled enough that you were starting to float.

“We’re here babe! We’re gonna get you out!” Mikey reassured you. 

You whimpered helplessly. You were having a hard time keeping your head above water, not really able to swim with a broken dislocated arm and broken ankle. 

“Stay back!” Leo sliced at the glass, and Mikey hit it with his nunchucks as hard as he could, but their attacks barely left a scratch!

“Guys! We have incoming!” Donnie yelled as Stockman had started flying around the room, maniacally laughing as he swooped down and kicked the back of Mikey’s shell, almost knocking him over. 

“Dude, gross!” Mikey protested. Stockman looked to be drooling some kind of acid substance from his mouth.

Bebop and Rocksteady had recovered and started to charge towards them. Leo and Mikey had to jump away from your tank to avoid getting trampled. 

“Donnie, that glass is as hard as steel!!” Leo jumped up and kicked Rocksteady across his cheek, then retreated.

“What’re we gonna do? (Y/n)’s tank is already half full!” Raph shouted. He was using his sai to hold back Bebop’s tusks as he tried to charge them. 

You were doing your best to calm your breathing enough that you could float, but every time your head ducked below water you panicked. Your body was exhausted and protested against your desperate movements, but you needed to survive long enough for the boys to break you out.

“Donnie! See if you can turn off the water!!! I’ve got Karai.” Leo ordered

“Mikey! It’s you and me!” Raph called over, clanging his sai together and shouted a war cry running up to strike Rocksteady. 

“What?! What about the bug brained dude??!! Eep!” Mikey ducked as Stockman flew over his head. He looked down and realized he was kneeling at the feet of Bebop, who had taken the black taser out of his pocket.

“You wanna taste too, little man?” 

When Bebop flicked on the taser, Mikey saw the small stains of fresh blood on the pointed tips that buzzed with electricity. He looked back over to you struggling in the tank and how heavily injured you looked.

He saw red.

Mikey had a rare moment of true anger as he jumped to his feet and knocked the taser out of Bebop’s hand with his nunchucks, and in a flurry of rapid hits he beat back the warthog. He finished him off with a powerful roundhouse kick to the head.

“THAT’S WHAT YOU GET FOR MESSING WITH MY BAE!” He shouted triumphantly.

Raph looked back to Mikey with wide eyes, proud of his little bro for letting loose. “Woah. Way to go Mikey!” He ducked a hit from Rocksteady and punched him hard under his chin. Knocking him out cold. 

Leo was crossing swords with Karai. She was a skilled fighter. But he was much stronger than her. While he pushed her back with a heavy strike, she slipped on some of the mutagen that had spilled on the floor, allowing Leo to take advantage of the opening and disarmed her. He flicked her sword out of her hand and knocked her back. She glared daggers at him, quickly recovering. But seeing as Bebop and Rocksteady were knocked out, she opted for a tactical retreat.

“This is just the beginning.” She hissed and ran out of the lab door. 

Stockman was buzzing around your tank, still laughing maniacally. 

“You turtlezzzzz cannot defeat the mighty Dr Stockman!! I am invincible!! I am-“

Donnie turned on the taser at the end of his bo staff and vaulted it at the annoying human insect, striking him and electrocuting him, knocking him out of the air to fall on the floor with a gross splat.

“Good thing I always carry a bug zapper.” He deadpanned.

Donnie went back to trying to hack into Stockmans computer. He managed to get past the firewall with his hacking program, but he discovered that all of the interfaces connected to the tank control had been erased. 

There was no way to stop the tank from filling up completely. Donnie would have to write a whole new interface from scratch to control the tank.

There was no time.

You were running out of air, trying desperately to keep your head above water as the tank was almost full to the top. You took in one last deep breath just as the water consumed the last of the space. You held your good hand over your mouth and nose hard, trying to hold in the air, and floated down towards the bottom of the tank. 

No more air.

“(Y/N)!!!” 

“ANGEL CAKES!!!” Donnie and Mikey yelled out in panic.

Your eyes snapped open, hearing their muffled voices outside the tank. You swam over to the glass and met eyes with Raphael. He had picked a spot and began punching at the glass over and over again with his sai in his fists.

The needled jabs just managed to scratch the surface. 

You looked at him sadly through the glass. He was stressed, sweating and desperate to break through. Mikey had grabbed a chair and had chucked it at the glass from another spot but it just bounced off and broke on the floor.

Leo was standing behind Donnie with his hand on his shoulder, but his eyes didn’t leave your face. 

Time was running out. You were choking on the stale air in your lungs. Head getting dizzy from lack of oxygen. You removed your hand from your mouth and pressed it up to the glass, some bubbles of air escaping your mouth. Your eyebrows knit together to concentrate on not breathing in the fluid in the tank. But you were suffocating and in pain. 

It was hard.

You looked back up at Raph, and forced a smile on your face. You felt sad. You didn’t want them to see you like this. They felt so far away. 

Darkness was consuming your vision. The last remaining bubbles of air escaped from your mouth and your eyes slipped closed. 

“NO!!! NO-! (Y/N), STAY WITH US.” Raph pounded his fist hard against the glass. 

“DAMN IT.” Donnie frustratingly slammed his fist down next to the keyboard, his head falling into his hands. None of the lines of command coding he was typing in were working.

Leo left Donnie’s side and strode up to the tank.

“Move.” Leo ordered as he came up behind Raph. He unsheathed his swords and began slicing at the glass again. It was barely making a scratch. But combined with the small dents Raph had been making, he was slowly chipping away at the surface.

“Leo! If you can manage to cut 1.2 centimeters deep, it should weaken the glass enough to shatter with enough force!” Donnie yelled from where he was still furiously typing into the stationed keyboard. His attempts to unlock the system all in vain. 

Leo and Raph worked together to stab and slice at the weakest point in the glass until finally-

*crack*

A small fracture appeared in the glass. 

“There!!” Donnie called out. Raph and Leo switched to charging at the glass and ramming it full force with their shoulders. Over and over as the cracks grew wider and wider.

Mikey came over, and with a hand on Leo’s shoulder, the leader stepped aside to let his little brother help. Mikey joined Raph and rammed the glass again with such force the crack split all the way across the glass. One more strike-

The glass shattered on impact.

The gush of water that burst through swept Mikey and Raph off their feet. The floor of the lab flooded, and your body washed up on the floor. Lifeless and unmoving.

“(Y/N)!!!!!!” The boys all yelled. 

Leo reached you first, falling into a kneel at your side. He ripped out the two needles from your back and held you in his arms. Donnie rushed over and slid down into the other spot at your side, his goggles pulled into place as he quickly checked you over.

“They’re not breathing. Put them down flat, now.” Leo obeyed and laid you on your back. Donnie first pressed down on your diaphragm to check for water blocking your lungs, then began compressions. 

The room was dead quiet all except for the sounds of Donnie’s whispered counting as he pressed down on your chest. He paused, opened your mouth, pinched your nose, and breathed into your lungs. 

Mikey was nervously walking around you back and forth, and Raph watched you from a distance, a vacant expression as he watched your face for any sign of movement, pleading with himself for you to be okay. 

After what felt like an eternity, you coughed. Leo quickly rolled you lay on your side. You spit up water, gasping for air. You felt like you were coughing up a lung full of ethanol. 

Mikey cheered and Raph took a deep breath, covering his face with his hands. Donnie fell backwards onto his butt and pulled his goggles off his head, so incredibly relieved you were breathing. Leo rubbed your back comfortingly as you got your breathing back under control.

Once you got a suitable amount of oxygen back in your lungs, you whimpered. Your throat was burning and a pain in your stomach and chest made it hard to breathe.

Leo picked you up again, and held you close to his chest. Your eyes fluttered open and you winced at the bright light from the ceiling.

“Welcome back.” Leo said with a smile on his face.

“Leo…?” Your voice was quiet and scratchy. You looked around at Donnie, Mikey, and Raph that all came into view around you and Leo.

“Guys….?” You felt barely conscious. Head foggy and tired like you were still under water.

“We’re right here.” Donnie assured you, reaching down to pick up your good hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze.

All the fear and emotion of drowning and being captured suddenly crashed down on you all at once. You sniffed and big tears gathered in your eyes.

“I was… so scared… I thought I was going to lose you….!” You hiccuped and sobbed as Leo held your trembling form tightly against his chest.

“Shhhh, it’s okay. I’m here. We got you.” Leo soothed, rubbing his hand down your back. He buried his nose into your damp hair and held you tight.

“You had us worried there for a minute!” Donnie was smiling at you, soft and relieved. Mikey was standing behind him rubbing tears out of his eyes.

“Let’s get you home.” Raph said, kneeling down behind you. 

“Wait. I need to splint their arm and their ankle first. Mikey, can you find me some-“

*crack*

“Will this work?” 

Mikey had already broken off the thin legs of a chair across the room. 

“Yeah that works fine.” He pulled out two rolls of gauze from one of the pockets on his belt, and took the offered sticks from Mikey, who knelt down by your feet. 

“What’re we gonna do about him?” He asked, motioning over to Stockman’s twitching form across the room.

The brothers all sneered at the fly mutant with similar levels of disgust on their faces, finding him rather gross. You smiled.

“Just leave him there, we can worry about him another time.” Leo offered, adjusting you in his grip. You winced terribly when your arm was moved. 

“….Is ...your arm dislocated?” Leo asked you, holding you upright in a sitting position, now thoroughly checking you over. 

Donnie and Mikey were working together to splint your ankle, Mikey holding up your foot while Donnie wrapped the splint to it.

“Let me see that.” Raph placed his hands on your shoulder and you clenched your teeth and whined quietly at the sharp pain.

“Leo, hold them still for a minute.” 

“Just hold onto me tightly, it’ll be over in a second.” Leo hugged you close, wrapping an arm around your good side.

Raph got hold of your tender arm, and with practiced ease, popped your shoulder back into place. You cried out loudly and buried your face in Leo’s shoulder, taking deep breaths. 

Raph tried to rub the soreness out of your poor shoulder. “Good job, princess. Now let Donnie get a look at that break.”

You hesitantly detached yourself from Leo, your shaking red and swollen arm was carefully picked up by Donnie, who set the splint and carefully wrapped the bandages.

“I’ll be able to get a better look at it with the x-ray machine back at home. For now we just have to be really careful not to jostle them too much when carrying them back.”

“I got em.” Raph volunteered. Leo looked to Raph, wordlessly nodding his head for his brother to take you from his arms.

“Careful of their arm….”

“Got it.” 

Without much effort, Raph scooped you up in his big arms. You winced as a sharp stabbing pain radiated through your stomach as you were held close to Raph’s chest.

Something was definitely wrong.

“I’m sorry, princess. It’s just until we get you home.” Raph apologized. Leo led everyone quickly out of the lab. 

Once back out in the hallway you had entered from, you noticed with visible shock the literal sea of bodies that covered the floor. Foot ninja. They fought through all of them, just to get to you.

Everyone exited the lab, careful to stick to the shadows as the sun began to rise. As the turtles made their way for their home, your stomach burned worse and worse with a white hot pain that radiated through your body. The movement of the city passing you by made you become dizzy, and your head felt like it was spinning. You felt nauseous and incredibly tired. 

“Hey Raph….?”

“Yeah princess?”

“I’m sorry I couldn’t save you guys…. You had to save me instead….” You weren’t making any sense. Raph could barely hear you as the wind whipped past his head. You just felt so tired.

“Hey, stay with me, princess. We’re almost there. It’s okay.” Raph didn’t know what the right thing to say was. But your eyes were starting to slide closed.

“Can we…. Can we watch Princess Bride again…. When we get home….?”

Raph smiled at that.

“Yeah. We’ll watch it as many times as you want, short stack.” He didn’t care if his brothers teased him for secretly liking the girly movie. He didn’t care if he had to watch it with you a hundred times. He just wanted you to get better.

“We’re almost there. How you holding up?” 

Silence. 

“(Y/n)…?”

“Mmh?” 

Your eyes were closed.

“Come on, wake up, we’re almost there.”

He was desperate. 

“Mm…hm…” 

You hummed, but your eyelids felt too heavy to lift. You felt yourself sinking into a dark liquid abyss. You could no longer fight the pull.

“(Y/n)….. (y/n)? Hey…! Hey, no no no no no, you gotta stay awake. Come on princess…! (Y/N)!!!”

You felt Raph try to shake you awake, felt his muscles tense as he pushed himself to go faster. 

“We’re almost there, hold on…!”

“Hold on….”

Darkness overtook you.

Part 8

@itsberrydreemurstuff @thecreat0r64 @eli-chris @kurlyfrasier @autisticnutcase @drenix004 @donniesgirlie @cherryp-op @foggyturtleknightangel @blackrockshooter780 @l-n-g-t @peachesdabunny @silverwatergalaxy @willy-the-witch @caeliasaida @veri-varily @xnorthstar3x @leonardo-dabitchy @sh1ga-to3s

If anyone else wants to be tagged for the next update, let me know in the comments! :]

[inflamedrosenkranz]

Viktor doesn't want to die, nor does he want Hextexh to be destroyed, but he's resigned to it anyway because he knows that carrying out the Hextech project to save himself and other people in need will lead to its exploitation for cynical purposes that will be disastrous for the whole world.

However, when he emerges from his coma in the Hexgoo and discovers his newly found thaumaturgic potential, he finally submits to it. Submits to the obsession of saving people in pain, saving the world to save himself. And above all, to spread the warm benevolence of universal love among his flock in order to be loved by them. He becomes a kind of guru, adored by his subjects. At last, he is narcissistically valued. And that's a fundamental human need, especially when you've been alone and shunned all your life by society because of your differences. Finally cured of his disease by the Arcane and the Shimmer combined, but also corrupted by them, aware that they give him immense power that an outsider such as himself could never have hoped to gain through socially and legally normal channels, he loses sight of the fact that curing people of their suffering must not be done at the risk of exerting a hold over them and depriving them of their free will, of their entire humanity.

The normal Viktor knew all this, and such a prospect frightened him, because he wanted nothing but to free the world from the evils plaguing it in a truly selfless way. Sure, he also vowed to leave a legacy, a famous name behind him, as he made clear to Heimerdinger when the latter revealed that he knew he was going to die, but still the idea of the common good was inscribed in him, and for that reason he wanted history to remember him as a truly disinterested victor over oppression, not as a new oppressor imposing his misguided idea of the good and ontological liberation on the masses.

But the corrupt Viktor? He sank into hubris, putting forward his legitimate unfulfilled desire for love and recognition under the pretext of working in the name of the common good. In reality, he was only working for himself and to gorge himself on the love of others and self-love that he lacked. And he did so in devastating fashion on a massive scale, in proportion to his very deep narcissistic fissure, his immense, intense need to be seen, loved, understood and recognized. His inner emptiness was tantamount to the destruction of humanity, recreating and even widening this morbid gap on the outside while effectively believing he was filling it with the life and love he had always craved. He only admitted his defeat, the horror of his totalitarian undertaking and its genocidal nature when, having "phagocytized" Jayce, he realized that the only thing that mattered to him was to love him and be loved by him in return. In the end, he only needed Jayce's love and his warm gaze on him; the love of a single person who contains the whole univers in their soul and eyes.

Everything we think and do always comes back to this: our unfathomable need to be loved and accepted for what we are. And Viktor will finally be loved, truly, genuinely, authentically loved, by Jayce and Sky, but at the cost of their own three lives. At least he was loved by two people who literally sacrificed themselves for him. And his real tragedy is that he didn't realize it until it was far too late.

[metamorphesque]

ASALA: Armenian Secret Army for the Liberation of Armenia (part 1)

In 1915, ottoman turkey committed the Genocide of Armenians: more than 1.5 million Armenians were massacred.

Women were assaulted, raped, sexually mutilated and tortured. Many were killed by bayoneting or died from prolonged sexual abuse. The “lucky ones” managed to kill themselves, while others were sold as slaves, forced to work as prostitutes or into marriage by their perpetrators. An eyewitness testified, "It was a very common thing for them to rape our girls in our presence. Very often they violated eight or ten year old girls, and as a consequence many would be unable to walk, and were shot."

The men were usually separated from the rest of “the deportees” during the first few days and executed, but, of course, not before being tortured and mutilated. Some were crucified, beheaded, others were often drowned by being tied together back-to-back before being thrown in the water. So many bodies floated down the Tigris and Euphrates that they sometimes blocked the rivers and needed to be cleared with explosives. Other rotting corpses became stuck to the riverbanks, and still others traveled as far as the Persian Gulf.

In 1918, the young turk regime took the war into the Caucasus, where approximately 1,800,000 Armenians lived under Russian dominion. Ottoman forces advancing through East Armenia and Azerbaijan here too engaged in systematic massacres. The expulsions and massacres carried by the nationalist turks between 1920 and 1922 added tens of thousands of more victims. By 1923 the entire landmass of Asia Minor and historic West Armenia had been expunged of its Armenian population. The destruction of the Armenian communities in this part of the world was total.

And yet, despite all of this—the unimaginable horrors that plagued the Armenian nation in the early 20th century—what do you think the world did in response? After this descent into hell, after the suffering, the bloodshed, the total annihilation—what followed? Silence. Deafening, shameful silence, as always.

Silence—until it was shattered 58 years later, when, at the age of 78, having exhausted every peaceful avenue to draw the world’s attention to the Armenian Question and faced with nothing but ignorance, Gourgen Yanikyan fired 13 bullets at the Turkish consul and vice-consul. This singular act of defiance wiped 58 years of dust from the forgotten pages of Armenian history, forcing the world to confront the cause once again.By sacrificing his freedom, Yanikyan ignited a movement. His act became the catalyst for a wave of Armenian activism, inspiring the creation of ASALA, who would go on to fight for the recognition of the genocide.

In 1975, a group of Lebanese-Armenians led by Iraqi-Armenian Hakob Hakobyan, all of whose parents and/or grandparents were survivors of the genocide, inspired by Yanikyan’s self-sacrifice, decided to found an underground organization, which through armed actions will again bring the Armenian Question into the international political and legal dimension, present the recognition of the Armenian Genocide carried out by the turks in 1914-1923 by the international community, and create prerequisites for the liberation of Western Armenia. The organization was called ASALA - Armenian Secret Army for the Liberation of Armenia.

The military operations of the ASALA were mainly aimed at turkish embassies, consulates, diplomats, government officials, military and police institutions, the turkish business environment, especially the offices of "turkish airlines corporation", as well as the state and public structures of other countries, which showed financial or military support to the turkish state.

Now, why am I telling you about this today? Well, today - on September 24th marks the 43rd anniversary of the Van Operation (24/09/1981), carried out by 4 Armenian ASALA soldiers - Vazgen Sislyan, Hakob Julfayan, Gevorg Gyuzelyan and Aram Basmajyan. On this day in 1981, four Armenian youths, aged 20-24, armed with pistols, automatic rifles and explosives, seized the turkish consulate in Paris, holding it under their control for 15 hours.

4 Soldiers of The Van Operation taking off their masks

The trial of “VAN” turned into a trial of the turkish government. The “VAN” operation and the political trial that followed it played a major role in bringing the Armenian issue to the international political arena, globalizing the territorial claim and the violated rights of the Armenian people, creating a new wave of condemnation of the reality of the Armenian genocide, strengthening the pride and spirit of struggle among Armenians.

When all the hope has slipped away, It’s the mad who find a way.

Though violence is condemned, it is the cruel truth that it is the only language to which the world listens.

More about the Van Operation in the second part.

[tutoriel12]

in response to your beautiful “fraud Stan” art (again, beautiful btw)

i think stanFORD was one of those dudes who hated nickname and was very serious about his full name being use at all times. the only one who were allowed to give him nicknames was his brother (who did it out of honest love) and bill (who capitalized on “love” to control him).

versus stanLEY was the sibling/brother/friend who had a million nicknames are responded to them all; stan, stan-the-man, s-man, stanny, stan lee not the comic man. other horrible name examples. he was used to changing his name several times that anything that remotely SOUNDS like a name, he’d answer to it; the only word that felt like a nickname he EARNED was “grunkle”.

again, your art is beautiful and i hope you don’t mind me throwing this at you. smooches <3

oh my goodness thank u so much!! <33 im both flattered and a bit overwhelmed by the reception that piece has gotten. ohh man im so glad you sent because i have so so many thoughts on both of them!!

anyway. ur so very real. stanford pines is someone that had a very established identity from the beginning. he was a genius brainiac that didn't fit in with other kids, singled out from the beginning both by personality and by body. his six fingers serve as a constant reminder that he can't be anyone else but him. of course he'd search for acceptance through the thing he ties his self worth to: his intelligence. of course he'd fall victim to the first person who told him his existence was something to be celebrated!! he looks at his name, once with distaste, nowadays with neutral acceptance. he's stanford pines, he has six fingers, and he does not do well with people.

on the contrary, stanley pines…didn't have any of that. he was overlooked by his father, wishing he could get the same recognition as ford. he didn't have any merits of his own. barely passing highschool, on the verge of losing ford, and seemingly destined to stay in glass beach forever, his teenage years were marked by a desperation to hold onto whatever connections he had. after getting kicked out, he still lives in the shadow of his brother - trying constantly to achieve a success that would compare to ford's brilliance. his name didn't mean shit; it was his brother who mattered. stanley pines can turn into whoever and whatever he needs because he never had an identity worth holding onto in the first place.

in an ironic twist of fate, stanley ends up living with his brother's name, borrowing off of his achievements in order to both survive and save him. the mystery shack is now a lively place for random kids he managed to sort of adopt in spite of himself. ford isolated himself from everyone that cared about him; stan took his life and made it into a home. he was never brilliant like his brother, but the love he has for his family transformed ford's path of destruction into one of renewal. he saved his brother by destroying his life.

it's the nature of twins have their existence intertwined beyond seperation. stanley and stanford's lives align to save each other.

[xanderjkz]

Charlie Dalton- Misery Behind Walls

I finally figured out what makes Charlie's character such an interesting one (from my perspective)

There are alot of interpretations of his character but what the fandom can agree the most on is that this mf cares about his friends. Almost in a way that is above regular standard.

Okay sounds weird but why did I say it when it's never really shown? Well he often is in the moment when the other poet has a breakthrough in the movie. When evil Tom literally made Neil's day worse, he was the first to speak to him. But to base this little theory on a bigger proof I'd like you to remind the only scene where this big care is vocalised:

"Fiete you're going insane!" I'll be not be misinformed about my state of mind! Let's move on! He literally asks so many damn questions that Knox gets annoyed with it. And the tone Charlie uses in that scene isn't one to mock him or put Knox in question. He's just curious if Knox has thought this through. Because he cares!

But why? What is so damn interesting about this dude caring? What makes Charlie the way he is?

Charlie somewhat hides his care for his friends behind the nice wall of Humour. Humour is beautiful, it's Twistingly and contently a nice way of escapism. Humour is provoking a peal of laughter out of someone and that's what Charlie does. But over the years when you use this way of coping you start to twist in the wrong way. It's a wonder how anyone who uses this type of coping mechanism can even recognise themselves in the mirror. After a while, you hide your internal feelings behind a wall too. For yourself you become unrecognisable.

But why?

It's established in the first 10 minutes of the movie that Charlie is from a family of bankers who are fond of him continuing the legacy. And we know that he is from a wealthy family. And most wealthy kid trope in media follows the structure of pressure and unobtainable views. Wealthy people don't want to be touched by anything lower. So they have to obtain this image of untouchability. This is probably the way Charlie has been raised. Money is more important. And like most wealthy kids, they get neglected for that money.

Every kid wants love. And this is what Charlie probably chased. And still is. And love can be interpreted in lots of ways but as I see in myself, I always tried to get attention so they think of me. If they can't love me, then I should at least linger on their minds. So what's the quickest way to gain attention and potential Recognition?

(Here he more tries to loud than funny but the need for the same thing is still there)

He started to build his personality in a way that would later bring him to complete self-isolation. He doesn't give a fuck about money. And he most definitely doesn't want to go down the same way his father did. But something in him always wanted that recognition, so he didn't go against anything.

But then Keating happened

So we made clear that something inside him can't separate personality from coping, right? So what happens when a teacher comes around with the opinion to go against the system? Doubt? Anger? Or fascination?

Visionary

Charlie, if asked, def would've told you that life comes to him how it wants to be. As long as he makes his friends happy, then he is fine. Not happy but fine. So when Keating tries to bring new things into the mix, everybody began to rethink their story.

Todd got more comfortable

Neil pursued something he always wanted

Knox got the guts to ask a girl out

So what's up for Charlie? He becomes vulnerable with himself. As he lost his personality in humour so did the familiarity with himself. So every lesson he becomes more bold and Indulgent in poetry and the revolution.

But a journey to find oneself takes long. God a 16-year-old won't find it within 4 months. But for what it's worth he tries. Throughout the movie, these boys drift apart from tradition and self-destructive ideologies. The first time Charlie makes this change in his consciousness is this one:

(Love how he looks in the angle)

Doing poetry doesn't bring attention to himself, not in the way we established he needs. So why is he doing this now?

"You yap too much, we get it" well fuck you, I'm getting to the better part

The reason for his somewhat impulsive reaction is the way he saw himself in Keating. Keating is a poet, but Charlie at first doesn't care about that. What he does care about is the cheeky way Keating moves his lips. From the comments about Meeks and Pitts names to the way he openly makes a name for himself. He thinks of Keating as this older version of himself. And he doesn't know what to do with it.

(Again this is going on in his head without him actually verbalising it to himself. Everybody does that, just writing it down)

So now this boy is chasing something he thinks can bring him to the Keating kind of level. In this path, he slowly becomes more radical with his thoughts, in a way that is pushing things over the edge. But in a boiling kind of way.

First, we have him ripping out the page. Then, the playboy scene and then this one:

I'd like to believe that this was the first time that his inner self formed a sentence. In scenes before that one, he is fidgeting around, trying to really get into it. He liked what he heard. And while he is still clinging to this version poisoned on humour, he's getting out of it. BUT

This scene is where he lets himself go. And it's safe to assume that something must have happened between the pic before and now. What is it? Heck, I know. All I know is that he tested the water and realised it's alright. (Again he is a 16-year-old boy, every 16-year-old has doubts) so everytime we do see him in the cave, he's wearing the damn hat.

So what have we established:

He cares deeply for his friends

He hides his need for recognition behind jokes

He somehow lost himself in it

He sees himself in Keating

Then learns how to be his inner self again (partly)

And he's doing poetry! Or Poetrusic...

But why did I say partly? Well, this movie is called DEAD Poets Society. And who died at the end of the movie? Ofc His CHILDHOOD best friend Neil. (This is heavily implied but even if they aren't, Neil was the closest to Charlie). He was probably the first person to know about it and definitely jumped into impulsiveness. In a way where he takes over the responsibility. Let's be real if this was at the beginning of the story he would've been one to be non-functioning but after he got his punishment and faced his worst, he knew that there are things to not be self-centered about. It's obvious that Charlie told the others. I mean, these boys look so distributed that they definitely couldn't form any sentence to the others. So it is Charlie. It had to be.

But he does let his emotions out. Not vocalising them but he shows the others that he understands. Particularly in three scenes:

1.

2.

3.

( I literally wrote something AMAZING BUT FFS TUMBLR DELETED IT)

These scenes show him care and breaking. He let's his voice break while shoving snow into Todd's mouth. To clean Todd and to drown his thoughts aswell. He has to be there but God he breaks. Because he cared

He cared so damn much for Neil. And it was that stupid system that took him away. His inner self is caring, Poetic and confronting. But how?

With all his emotions that are directed at the system regarding Neil's death, he does his first rebellion. And that not singing. The singing is only a recognition of the fact that evil Tom isn't at fault. Being in the front row and not singing? Fucking provoking.

So what's next? Now that he has found his last finding piece? The confronting kind? Not the part hiding behind humour? (If you notice he hasn't cracked a joke since Neil offed. Ofc bc the times are dark but he could've said one after the funeral. But he didn't, he was just angry)

Well....

His last scene.

He knew what would happen once Cameron walked away. He knows his roommate too much. But the reason why he punched Cameron wasn't for the fact that they couldn't work it out on the remix but more for the fact that he saw Cameron as the system. As Cameron kept digging, Charlie thought that this was the way out. Every person who experienced grief knows it's all over the place and often not understandable. If I could explain it, I would say that he had the hope of starting the rebellion needed. But he couldn't.

He failed at confronting it to its most effective stage.

He managed to comfort his friends, he managed to change his mind. But sometimes confronting ends at the start.

But it was he who failed, not the mindset. It was the rest but most importantly todd who continued it...

It's sad to not hear anything after his expulsion but I think it would be even more heartbreaking. Charlie is a lot of things but the most important one is that he is a boy. Utterly experiencing things he shouldn't have. To think that he ended his time at Welton, disproving the thing he mostly cared for (which was attention to himself) just to find himself while so is...beautiful. He broke free and now has to be alone to find his future. This is both tragic and hope-fulfilling. Wherever he ended up, I hope Charlie learned to deal with Neil's death as well...

Or I'm delusional and he's just a 16-year-old boy without depth.

Again characters are always up for debate and everyone has their interpretation. I finally wrote down mine and think it's important to share. Do with it what you want but please remain polite. Except when you crack a joke

I want jokes 🔥

[sensualnoiree]

Tarot and Astrology: The Numerological Connection

Numbers In Tarot, each number holds a specific energy and meaning, enriching the interpretation of each card.

1: New Beginnings. The spark of potential, initiating action, and starting new endeavors.

2: Pairings & Choices. Balancing dualities, making decisions, and experiencing tension between opposites.

3: Creating & Connecting. Collaboration, expansion, and the synthesis of ideas and energies.

4: Stability & Security. Establishing foundations, seeking order, and dealing with immovable aspects.

5: Instability & Crisis. Disruption, conflict, and the challenges that bring growth and change.

6: Community & New Normal. Harmony, integration, and adapting to a new equilibrium.

7: Reflection & Assessment. Introspection, reevaluation, and warnings about justifying questionable actions.

8: Speed & Power. Momentum, strength, and the exercise of influence and control.

9: Independence & Solitude. Self-reliance, contemplation, and the culmination of personal journeys.

10: Completion. Fulfillment, the end of cycles, and the transition to new phases.

Number and Suit Combining numbers with suits provides specific insights into different aspects of life

1 + Cups: Abundance, New Love, Attraction. The beginning of emotional fulfillment and romantic ventures.

1 + Stones: Material Gain, New Job, New Investment. Starting new financial or career-related projects.

1 + Swords: Mental Clarity, Victory, Success. Fresh insights, triumphs, and intellectual breakthroughs.

1 + Wands: Urge to Create, New Projects, Ideas. The drive to initiate creative endeavors and pursue passions.

2 + Cups: Romance, Love, Partnerships, Connection. Deepening emotional bonds and forming meaningful relationships.

2 + Stones: Making a Choice, Juggling Resources, Endless Change. Balancing practical concerns and making important decisions.

2 + Swords: Compromise Needed, Stalemate in Negotiations. Finding balance in conflicts and navigating mental impasses.

2 + Wands: Determination, Planning for the Future. Strategic thinking and setting long-term goals.

3 + Cups: Friendships, Support, Celebration with Others. Social connections and joyous gatherings.

3 + Stones: Apprenticeships, Teamwork, Collaboration. Cooperative efforts and collective achievements.

3 + Swords: Heartbreak, Betrayal, Grief. Emotional pain and the challenges of overcoming loss.

3 + Wands: Optimism for Success, Working with Others, Waiting for Future Results. Anticipating progress and collaboration.

4 + Cups: Boredom, Apathy, Missed Opportunity. Emotional stagnation and unrecognized potential.

4 + Stones: Hoarding, Greed, Seeking Long-Term Security. Material conservatism and protecting assets.

4 + Swords: Look Within, Rest and Recovery. Healing, contemplation, and taking a break from activity.

4 + Wands: Good Times Shared, Public Celebrations. Joyous events and communal success.

5 + Cups: Dwelling on the Past, Grief, Disappointment. Emotional loss and the struggle to move forward.

5 + Stones: Financial Trouble, Isolation, Insecurity. Economic challenges and the need for resilience.

5 + Swords: Self-Destruction, Victory through Deceit. Moral conflicts and the cost of unscrupulous actions.

5 + Wands: Competition, Conflict, Challenge. Struggles for dominance and the drive to overcome obstacles.

6 + Cups: Gifts, Simple Pleasures, Happy Memories, Reunions. Nostalgia and the joy of revisiting the past.

6 + Stones: Giving and Receiving, Financial Prosperity. Generosity and mutual support in practical matters.

6 + Swords: Recovery from Hard Times, Moving On, Starting Over. Transitioning away from difficulties.

6 + Wands: Victory, Triumph, Popularity, Respect. Recognition and the celebration of achievements.

7 + Cups: Wishful Thinking, Illusion, Temptation. The dangers of unrealistic fantasies and distractions.

7 + Stones: Long-Term Projects, Patience, Commitment. Sustained effort and dedication to goals.

7 + Swords: Cutting Corners, Betrayal, Deceit. Ethical dilemmas and the consequences of dishonesty.

7 + Wands: Self-Defense, Stand Your Ground. The need to protect one's position and assert boundaries.

8 + Cups: A Turning Point, Voluntary Withdrawal. The decision to leave behind what no longer serves.

8 + Stones: Work Enjoyment, The Process of Mastery. Finding joy in diligent effort and skill development.

8 + Swords: Powerlessness, Feeling Trapped. Mental constraints and the need to find liberation.

8 + Wands: Sudden Change, News Out of the Blue. Rapid developments and unexpected information.

9 + Cups: Wishes Coming True, Having More than Enough. Fulfillment and the realization of desires.

9 + Stones: Self-Sufficiency, Financial Independence. The rewards of hard work and autonomy.

9 + Swords: Anxiety and Depression, Nightmares, Insomnia. Mental anguish and the need for emotional healing.

9 + Wands: Finding Your Strength, Maintaining Boundaries. Resilience in the face of adversity.

10 + Cups: Family Contentment, Happiness, Security. Emotional fulfillment and stable relationships.

10 + Stones: Building a Legacy, Investments, Retirement. Long-term success and material stability.

10 + Swords: The Worst is Over, Hitting Rock Bottom. The end of suffering and the beginning of recovery.

10 + Wands: Putting Your Needs First, Heavy Burden. The importance of self-care amidst responsibilities.

follow for more astro insights like this and head on over to @quenysefields or instagram sensualnoiree to book a session with me :)