#self destructor

[lilysofthevalleys]

[ilovewhimperingaudios]

[w3brot]

[darkangel888]

FUCK I have a favorite again. And they dare talk to other people so jealous I want to die, so jealous I want to hurt others, so insecure I want to kill others, so hurt I want to destroy everything,.. all over a fucking conversation! I hate this I hate this I fucking fucking hate this, why can’t I just like a person the normal amount why does it ruin my day when they have other friends, why am I so possessive so controlling I want them to be happy and healthy and for that they need other close connections and I do want them to have those… but I can’t stand to see it fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck kill me now:)

[delusi0nalraik0]

i want to be worse. when i'm self destructing i feel in control. if i choose to kxll myself slowly then i'm deciding my own destiny

[kash-the-krashout]

tw : sh // self destructive behavior

want to hit styros again deeper preferably. but don’t wanna see the look of concern on my brothers or my bfs face. i feel like shit. especially knowing my brothers gf (fucking love her) battles with sh too i don’t wanna add to that stress but like fuck i can feel my skin i’m sorry damn it . not to mention my bf (the best in the damn world) is in recovery so like fuck. part of me just wants to go to my brother and tell him how i’m feeling but idk man what if he doesn’t get it and i feel worse idk. i don’t want to tell my bf (has nothing to do with trust it’s because i support his recovery 100% and i don’t want to trigger him into a relapse. he’s been doing so good and i don’t want to fuck that up.) i feel like fucking shit because i just did it.. (used to sh daily but since my dad got custody of us life has been way , drastically better so i slowed down but like its apart of me now.) idk how to explain that everything can be going perfectly (it is) and i still feel the need to fucking bleed. i hate this part about myself. feeling like the only way i can function is if im bleeding and self destructing . wtf.

[osamotniony-smiec]

Kocham ból.

Chyba jestem masochistą.

[lilysofthevalleys]

still alive , unfortunately

[ilovewhimperingaudios]

[w3brot]

[darkangel888]

The worst part about being so broken is ruining the ones you love… they fall apart trying to love me

[mizaryy]

I hate it when someone thinks I’m blaming them for something that happened out of their control, after I tell them I did something self destructive because of it.

It’s not your fault I’m just venting.

I’m mentally ill, don’t blame yourself for me hurting myself, I’m not blaming you either, It’s not your fault.

just because you didn’t do something for me, just because something came up and we couldn’t hang out, just because you didn’t answer when I needed you because you were genuinely busy.

you are allowed to have your own life, it just hurts sometimes, I’m sorry I shouldn’t have to say that, but I know I make it feel like that sometimes.

don’t enable me and make me think that is ok to stop you from having your own life, but please stop getting mad at me for having feelings or being honest with you.

I swear it’s not my fault I’m like this, I swear I’m trying.

[osamotniony-smiec]

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[lilysofthevalleys]

it’s not like i’m hiding the fact i’m going to kill myself, it’s that nobody actually cares to acknowledge it .

[ilovewhimperingaudios]

[sobstoryofaloz3r]

self destructive, narcissistic, sociopathic, guilt tripper, attention seeker, sadistic...nothing can go wrong with that right???