#seems like a soft reboot of the series

[daydreamerdrew]

Jungle Comics (1940) #2

[makeyoumine69]

Euphoria (Memory Reboot x2)

PAIRING: Patrick Bateman x gn!Reader

SUMMARY: After wrestling with the lingering thoughts of Bateman, you finally found yourself open to Paul Allen's offer — a life-changing opportunity. But despite your resolve, you couldn't shake the need for closure. Determined, you sought one last encounter with Patrick, intent on resolving the unsaid and the undone before the cityscape of New York faded into your past.

CONTAINS: Smut, angst, mutual pining, obsessive behavior, desperate & sensual foreplay, anal fingering, pegging, sex toys, face riding, penetrative sex, rimming (Patrick receiving), oral sex (69, blowjobs), edging, biting, spanking, cum shot, masturbating, praise kink, body worship, drug usage, pet names, dirty talk, needy Patrick, misogyny, swearing, gaslighting, manhandling, mind manipulation.

WORDS: 8.7k

SONG REC: VØJ, Narvent — Euphoria

A/N: Hello everyone, I'm sorry it took me quite long to write this, I hope you like it! If you find any mistakes regarding gn!reader, please let me know!

LINKS: [MASTERLIST]; [SERIES MASTERLIST].

The clock’s ticking was the only sound in the opulent meeting room of Pierce & Pierce office. Your heart seemed to beat to the rhyme of ticking, while you were nervously spinning the thin cigarette in your hands but never really trying to actually smoke;  the glass ashtray in front of you would probably be left empty till the end of the day. It was even funny how drastically things changed after that…moment of privacy you shared with Bateman. Starting from that, you couldn’t really get him out of your head, even though it has already been several weeks of your pretending game of “nothing had happened” between you and Patrick. It was a matter of time, when your colleagues would start to notice your strange behavior whenever you and Bateman were in one room. 

Squeezing the cigarette between your shaky fingers, you turned around in the leather chair to look at the New York skyline through the wide window. ‘That it is not an exit,’ echoed in your ears and you tried to shake the nervousness off from your tense shoulders, but the more you were being alone, the more surrounding space was weighing on you as if you were on the very bottom of the Pacific ocean. 

The moment the door swung open and Timothy Bryce entered the meeting room, you were more in control of yourself. “Hey, Tim. Haven’t seen you in ages.”

“Sorry, (y/n). Had a business call with some delusional prick.” Bryce snarled and took a seat across from you.

“Delusional prick?”

"Yeah, you know...delusional," he chuckled and glanced at the cigarette in your hand, which was still more like an accessory. "The guy thought I gave a fuck about his life and his wife, who used to be a whore, by the way."

With a soft snicker, you made yourself more comfortable in your chair, throwing one leg over another. “Wanna smoke?”

“Yep,” he leaned over the table to take the cigarette, your fingers touched for a moment but none of you paid attention. “So, what happened? Why did you want to see me?”

Confused, you took a moment to think about your answer. You worried a lot about picking the right words, but now you were even more anxious. ‘I just need to tell him the truth and that’s all,’ you reassured yourself before turning to face Tim. “Well, the thing is - I’m quitting P & P.”

Tim’s face remained unchanged for a second, but then the man furrowed his brows, tilting his head and rubbing his ear as if he didn’t hear. “You're what? Quitting?”

"Right," you gave him a half-smile and continued. "Recently, I received a very... very good offer from one company in Chicago."

“Jesus Christ. Chicago? Really?”

“What’s wrong with it?”

Bryce lit the cigarette and leaned back in his chair. “Who the fuck even gave you this idea? And why so sudden? You have such a good job here, with a good salary and…” He paused and blew a few rings of smoke. “Do those bastards pay well?”

Laughing heartily, you crossed your arms over your chest and watched the smoke dividing the room in two with a white veil. “So many questions. Are you interested in leaving Pierce & Pierce too?”  That was not a serious question, since you knew that Bryce was more than satisfied with his job. “If I say who recommended that place to me, will you keep it a secret?” Tim nodded even before you could say something else. “I was at one P&P party, that one you decided to skip a week ago. So, there I met Paul Allen and we talked a bit and he mentioned that he just came back from his business trip from Chicago…we had a long conversation, but as a result he proposed to me to think about the option to change my current job.”

All the time while you were speaking, Tim was glancing at you with wide open eyes, his prominent brows curling up and down whenever you mentioned Paul Allen’s name. It was always funny for you to watch Bateman & Co getting so frustrated and annoyed whenever Allen was around or whenever someone discussed his success with having the Fisher account. To say the least, his ability to get a reservation at Dorsia. ‘I’m not gonna tell any of them that Allen offered me dinner in Dorsia after that party.’

“So you were unsatisfied with your job all this time and didn’t say anything? That sucks, (y/n). Didn’t expect that to come, not gonna lie,” Bryce made a low sound which was very similar to growling, but at the same time it also sounded like a scoff. “But, if that really is what you want, then who am I to judge you? We have only one life to fulfill all our needs, right?”

Timothy’s statement was like a balm to your soul, that was exactly what you hoped he would tell you and when he did, you felt some kind of relief washing over you like a breeze of fresh air.

“Thank you, Tim,” you finally grinned and put your elbows on the table. “Glad you didn’t start to read me notations.”

“Are you gonna tell him?”

“Him?” You squinted and tilted your head; your intuition was screaming that something was so damn wrong.

“Bateman,” with a sly smile, Bryce put the cigarette out in a glass ashtray; his glance was eloquent but you never really managed to read it. “I bet he will be upset. Very upset.”

“Bryce ” you rolled your eyes. ‘Is he lying or…?’ That question remained unspoken. “Leave these cheesy jabs to yourself, okay?”

Tim only laughed at your weak attempt to threaten him and stood up from the table. “You know, I saw him with Jean in Arcadia last night…” Now this information could come in handy… “I think they had some kind of date or something, huh,” he chuckled again and fixed his tie, giving the picture on the opposite wall a scrutinizing glance. “I don’t know what’s going on between you two, but something is definitely happening. In my opinion, you should tell him about your…unexpecting leaving, you know.”

Before you could respond, Timothy Bryce looked at you one last time and left the meeting room. Now, you were left alone but not really alone as the weight of the newfound information lay on your shoulders like two massive dumbbells. ‘If everything is too obvious for Bryce, what other things might the others think about me and Bateman?’ That was a rhetorical question mostly, but still you couldn’t even get up from the chair, sensing the strange, chilling fear inside your chest—what if you were mistaken with accepting the offer of a new job?

Gritting your teeth, you snarled and almost kicked the table from beneath, your palms were clenching and unclenching, thankfully no one could see you like this. Swiftly but nervously, you finally stood up and headed out from the meeting room, striving to avoid any of your soon-to-be-ex colleagues on your way to Bateman’s office. 

How many times have you rehearsed the words you were going to say while you were walking up there? Countless. But still, when you entered Patrick's office and saw his lovely secretary, everything inside you froze - words, emotions, even your breath.

“Hi, Jean,” you mumbled, with a half-smile on your slightly tensed face. “Looking good.”

“Uh, thank you,” the blonde woman replied and fixed the stray lock of hair behind her ear. “Is there anything I can do for you?”

As soon as you heard the echo of Patrick's voice through the office door, a lump formed in your throat and you had to cough several times because of the unpleasant dryness.

“Well,” you paused and glanced at the closed door with a nameplate ‘Patrick Bateman’ on it. “You would help me a lot if you let me have a private conversation with your boss.”

“Patrick is,” her voice suddenly wavered, implying that something was wrong. “He’s busy right now.”

“Oh,” you stepped back involuntarily. “Okay, I can come later.”

“No,” Jean replied curtly. “I’m sorry, but today is not an option at all.”

‘Is that some kind of joke?’ You hummed to yourself, already regretting coming here in the first place. “All right then. Have a nice day, Jean.” Turning around you already stepped out from the office when you head her voice:

“(Y/n), wait. Oh, I hope I pronounced your name correctly.” She blushed once you came back inside. “I think I can tell him about your visit, when he will be less busy.”

That offer was not something you would expect. “Actually, that would be nice,” you clicked on your tongue, considering your next steps. “Tell him that I have a reservation at Dorsia at eight o’clock–”

“Today?” Her question cut off your bluffing. “Oh, sorry! I didn’t mean to interrupt you.”

You just grinned politely in return. “Yep, today. Tell him…that I need to talk with him about business and stuff. And, that it would be probably the last chance for him to catch up with me.” Jean’s eyes widened for a moment, but you reassured her instantly. “No drama, just changing my job.”

“Uh, that was probably a tough decision?”

“Not really,” you winked at her and crossed your arms over the chest. “But don’t tell him about that, okay?”

“Yeah, sure.” She tried to hide her confusion behind a warm smile but failed. “I’ll tell him that you will be waiting for him at Dorsia tonight and that this conversation is very important.”

“Uh-huh,” you hummed and for a moment just stood there, looking at the closed office door. “Thank you, darling. For everything.”

You made a special accent on the word ‘darling’, purposely embarrassing her and leaving no room for any questions and other stuff that would make a current situation even more fucked up. 

After you left Bateman’s office you had to find Allen as only half of what you told Jean was actually bluffing—you knew that Paul had a reservation at Dorsia tonight, considering he was inviting you for dinner. Allen’s strange interest in you wasn’t your top priority at that moment but using it for your sake was something you couldn’t deny at such a situation. So when you finally found Paul in one of the meeting rooms, you persuaded him to give you that reservation, explaining that you wanted to show one of your colleagues Dorsia before you would leave New York and move to Chicago. And even though everyone would find out that that colleague was Patrick Bateman, you wouldn't’ care since you would be far away from here.

A few hours later, the melodious voice of Whitney Houston reverberated off the walls of the opulent living room in Bateman's apartment, the lyrics of "I Wanna Dance with Somebody," which Patrick knew perfectly, striking a chord in his chest every time the song came on.

But today everything was different.

Everything, except some random blonde bimbo who was on her knees between Bateman’s spread legs, sucking his thick cock but not actually giving him any pleasure. Frustrated, the man tugged on her hair without any compassion, bringing her closer, so her nose was almost brushing against his hairy pubis. But almost immediately, the woman began to whimper and claw at the perfect skin of his hips, and he didn't like it.

“What? Already tired?” Bateman sneered and fixated the blonde’s head in one place for a moment by her neck. “Or is that your first time? Then, I’m so fucking honored!"

As soon as the man let the blonde go, she pushed him away and sat back on her ass, breathing heavily. “Are you crazy?” the bimbo inquired and pressed a hand to her half-exposed breasts, her whole appearance looked messy. “I was about…t-to choke on your fucking dick!”

Sighing, Bateman rolled his eyes and just stretched out on the couch, lazily stroking his half-hard shaft. "So, this is your first time?" The woman hesitated to answer, which only made Patrick mock her even more. "Did you tell me that you have a boyfriend? And he works at P&P, right?"

Wiping her mouth with undisguised contempt, the blonde started to get up, but Patrick stepped on the hem of her dress and she almost fell. "Marcus! Stop it!"

"Uh, look at you," the man chuckled, watching her feeble attempts to get up. "Such a pathetic little bitch, pathetic and greedy," the man added, giggling. "Ready to give head to every vice president at Pierce & Pierce! Your boyfriend should be so proud of you."

The woman was on the verge of tears when Bateman finally allowed her to get up and collect her things. She had been in such a hurry that she had left her panties on the glass coffee table. All this gave Patrick much more pleasure than the blonde's inexperienced blowjob.

"Ask your boyfriend to teach you how to suck dicks," he blurted out as the woman rushed into the hallway, rifling through her purse looking for something. "Since he's probably a pro at that sort of thing."

But the girl was already gone. So the man could only laugh to himself, so proud of his cheeky jabs, if only he didn't feel like a schoolboy dreading his upcoming meeting with his teacher. With a heavy sigh, Bateman closed his eyes for a second, his cock was already soft, but his sac were still tense and full of his cum; he felt too unsatisfied with himself, which only made things worse.

What was it even for?

The man could just take some coke, lie down on his bed, close his eyes and think of you—that was enough for him to cum so hard that he had to go to the laundry almost every day because he ran out of sheets. But today was different, considering that Patrick was going to meet you, and not just anywhere, but in fucking Dorsia. It seemed that everyone in this town could get a res there, but not him.

Biting his lower lip, the man looked down at the throbbing cock in his hand - the mere thought of you was making him horny as hell. "Shit…" If only he could reboot his memory and get rid of that scene in the Tunnel. If only. Meanwhile, the Whitney Houston tape continued to play the song "Where Do Broken Hearts Go". Bateman doubted he would be able to masturbate, he was too nervous and stressed out, even imagining you while that bitch was giving him head didn't work. Although it usually did. "Dorsia, huh," the man giggled nervously and checked his Rolex - he still had plenty of time. As if spellbound, Patrick slid to the floor and kicked off his leather shoes, his red tie already loosened and his pants hiked down. Leaning against the couch, Bateman threw his head back and began to jack off, recalling the forbidden, sinful sensations of your hand sliding along his hot flesh. "Mmm-fuck," he moaned and shivered, his free hand already gripping the edge of the white couch, several beads of sweat running down his tense temples. What if today he finally found the courage to confess? Confess that all these days had been a fucking torture for him, that he was ready to crawl on the walls from how much he longed for you, not even physically, but mentally. Maybe, just maybe, your reassurance that everything was not over for him, that maybe he still had a chance to have some normalcy in this cruel world—could change everything?

"Fuck, f-fuck!" Patrick cursed, sensing that his impending orgasm was slipping away from him just by reflecting on the things that were happening between the two of you. Jerking off and thinking about your sexy voice, your hot body and your cheeky smile was one thing, it always turned him on better than anything else, but thinking about the complexity of your relationship… that was not a turn-on for him. Not at all. Cursing to himself, Patrick slicked back his auburn hair and quickly got up to stagger to the bathroom, where he nervously opened the cabinet behind the mirror and found a small white jar of pills. Xanax was his only stress reliever so far. Taking a deep, almost desperate breath, Bateman looked at his reflection, his bloodshot eyes full of tears that threatened to cascade down like a waterfall. "This is not an exit." Patrick told his reflection, but opened the jar anyway and took a handful of pills. Frustrated, unsatisfied, he didn't know how he was going to survive dinner with you, and Dorsia was the last thing on his mind. "Because I'm scared. I'm so fucking scared."

Luckily, the marble walls of his bathroom were the only witnesses to his downfall.

Dawn came to New York faster than you could imagine. All the way to Dorsia you were nervous, but still confident in the plan you had made earlier that day. Even though you had failed in your previous attempt to dot the T's at the Tunnel, today would be different, you were sure of it. ‘I don't even know why, though,’ you chuckled to yourself, and the taxi driver gave you a concerned glance, but you just shrugged it off, signaling him to concentrate on the road.

In the restaurant everything looked the same as when you were here with Paul Allen, but this time you were not the one who was invited, but the one who invited another person—named Patrick Bateman—and speaking of whom, was late and that made you quite anxious. ‘What if he just doesn’t come?’ This thought made you fidget in the chair, your hands fumbling with the napkin on your knees and after telling the waiter for the second time that you were expecting someone else to come, your fingers became cold as if they were frozen. 

“Maybe I can bring you some drinks?” The waiter didn’t give up, spurring you to order at least something to drink.

Quickly running a hand across your strained face, you exhaled loudly and nodded. “Yeah, drinks,” you stummered when you looked past the waiter, noticing the familiar elegant silhouette coming close to your table. “Can you…bring…some water?”

Confused, the waiter glanced down at the full glass of water next to you. “Uh, more water?”

“(Y/n),” Bateman’s voice echoed across the space. “I hope I didn't make you wait for so long,” he chuckled and took a seat at the table. “Had some important business affairs.” The moment he noticed the confused waiter, Patrick gave him his most sassy smile and checked his Rolex for no reason, probably just to show them out. “Can you please bring me a glass of J&B and some fresh salad to your taste.”

‘A salad, really?’ You almost snickered, but instead your face turned into a neutral expression. "Business, huh?"

Bateman rested more comfortably in his chair after the waiter finally left. "You know, some affairs with blonde hair and long legs, big tits and an amazing ass."

That came out of nowhere. 

Still calm, you watched the man across from you smile, surely proud of himself and so damn bossy it was almost absurd. "You mean someone in particular, don't you?"

“Oh, yeah,” Patrick put his both elbows on the table, clasping his hands, revealing his gold Rolex once again. “Her name is Stephany, if I’m not mistaken, she’s a girlfriend of one of our accountants,” the man paused before snickering. “That one who makes monthly reports, you know him. So, I’m a bit late because I couldn't leave such a lovely girl without a treat she deserved.”

Right now, you didn't care if it was true or not—his well-framed—confidence was something you found very interesting and even amusing, as it was proof that he was preparing for this dinner just like you were.

"And that's when I thought vice presidents actually worked at Pierce & Pierce." With a slight grin, you joked and finally took a sip of water, feeling your throat suddenly go dry, just like when you were talking to Jean earlier.

Bateman's sudden laugh rang out like shattered glass. "'C'mon, (y/n), don't pretend you don't know that-"

"I know that your father owns almost half of the company," you interrupted him abruptly, and he wasn't happy about it. "And that gives you certain privileges."

"Don't be envious. It doesn't suit you."

"Envious?" You set the glass of water aside. "I think it was me who invited you here so that you could finally visit Dorsia… at least once."

The air between the two of you was thick with venom and something even more poisonous. Nevertheless, you'd be lying to yourself if you said you didn't think Bateman was acting like the jerk he undoubtedly was. But, to be honest, you expected him to act a little less smug.

"I still think this place is overrated," Patrick hissed through clenched teeth right as the waiter brought him his whiskey and salad with sliced vegetables and some cheese, which he didn't even touch, taking a big gulp of his drink. "So, uh, Jean told me you wanted to talk to me about something important. What is it?"

The waiter didn't even try to offer to check the menu again and retreated, but he would definitely come back later with the same request, since you hadn't ordered anything yet.

"Well, it doesn't seem to matter anymore," you suddenly declared, crumpling the paper napkin before dropping it on the finest tablecloth. "The thing is—I'm quitting P&P and moving to Chicago. That's it. Nothing special, really."

The moment of silence washed over them both like a tidal wave. Visibly shocked, Bateman just sat there, then nervously straightened his tie and looked around as if to call for help. 'Not so ballsy anymore, Patty?' There was something about the way he was humiliated, something that stirred a burning flame in your gut that came dangerously close to burning you alive from the inside. And again, you would be lying to yourself if you pretended you could control it.

"Chicago?" Patrick repeated as if he hadn't heard correctly.

"Why do both you and Bryce react as if Chicago were a desert island?"

"Heh," Bateman rubbed the bridge of his nose and leaned back in his chair. "So Bryce knows everything. Why am I not surprised?"

"I'd tell you more," that was the moment you'd been waiting for so long—the moment of his vulnerability, and you couldn't stop yourself like a shark who sensed blood in the water. "Paul Allen was the one who actually recommended this job to me."

Patrick's jaw clenched at the mention of Paul Allen. "Really?"

"Yes," you continued to corner him. "One day we were having dinner, here, in Dorsia," you grinned, catching every little change in Bateman's no longer confident face. "He said one of his buddies was starting a new company, and they were looking for specialists… like me."

"Well," he began, sliding his hand across the table's surface as if to calm down. "Good for you, (y/n). Congratulations!" That was the most fake 'congratulations' you ever heard, even though you were expecting a slightly different reaction. "But I don't understand. Why didn't you talk to me before? Before you made your decision."

This question almost made you choke. 'Did he really say that?' And just as you were about to answer, the waiter came across the table again, choosing the perfect moment. Before he could offer to check the menu, you raised your hand in an irritating gesture. "Bring me a vodka and orange juice," Patrick's eyebrows arched almost immediately. "Double vodka, please."

"Yes, s-sure." The waiter stuttered before taking the crumpled napkin and walking away, very stressed.

Without giving yourself time to think, you leaned against the table and muttered. "Why should I? We are not friends."

"Of course not," Bateman scowled, crossing his arms over his broad chest, the black pinstriped suit outlining his physique perfectly. "Not after you gave me a decent handjob in the Tunnel bathrooms."

Patrick caught you off guard by injecting this argument so blatantly into the conversation. "Decent? It was fucking amazing." You growled and quickly turned around to see if anyone was paying attention to your table, and when you were sure there was nothing to worry about, you faced Patrick again. "Too amazing, considering you seem to be thinking about it all the time."

"W-what? I… I didn't…"

Sneering, you tapped your fingers on the table in nervous anticipation of your drinks, even though you hadn't planned on drinking any alcohol, wanting to keep yourself as sober as possible for the dinner and everything that might or might not happen afterwards.

"Relax, Bateman," you rested your chin on your clasped hands, finally allowing yourself to examine his handsome appearance, including the way his cheeks were tinged with a red hue. "You've said too much already."

And from that moment on, you began to feel relaxed, even pleased with all the things Patrick revealed to you, accidentally or not, you would use every little detail to your own advantage when the time came.

A little later, when the waiter finally brought your cocktail, you finished it too quickly, so you asked for it to be repeated under the attentive hazel eyes of the man sitting on the other side of the table. The more drunk you got, the more topics you discussed, but when you mentioned Paul Allen again, you noticed that Patrick's good mood was fading.

"Wait a minute!" You held out a hand to stop him from jumping from one topic to another. "Can you tell me why the mere mention of Paul Allen triggers you so much? Is there something between you two?"

Bateman couldn't hold back a loud, hearty laugh. "That joke's too tasteless even for Bryce," he finished his whiskey, the salad still untouched on the table in front of him. "Allen…he's…not the person he tries to pretend to be."

"Oh?"

"I think he's part of that Yale thing."

You narrowed your eyes and leaned in closer. "Yale thing? What do you mean?"

Patrick quickly licked his lips, not expecting you to delve further into the subject. "Well, I think he's probably a closeted homosexual who likes to do a lot of coke and have orgies with male hookers."

At first you just giggled out loud, not caring that some people were looking at you, but then your face suddenly became serious. "How do you know about that? Did he tell you or…" you smiled playfully. "Did he do something… that made you think so," you bit your lower lip and drank the last drop of your cocktail with unabashed thirst. "That sounds strange…very strange."

"You're drunk, (y/n)," Bateman murmured, tilting his hand as if thinking about something. "Too drunk, which gives me the impression that you're as much of an amateur at drinking as you are at doing coke."

"Uh, s-shut up."

"See? Can't even speak words."

"Maybe...maybe I am drunk, now what? Are you gonna be a fucking gentleman like you always try to be and offer me a ride? Or maybe," you fixed your hair nonchalantly, your vision slightly blurred. "Would you be brave enough to show me your apartment?"

As soon as those words came out of your mouth, you knew there was no turning back, and your inner voice, which usually kept you from doing shit you would regret, seemed to fall asleep from the high level of alcohol in your system.

The man across from you straightened up at your bold suggestion, reading the subtext with ease. "Is that what you want? For me to take you to my place?"

His question hung in the air for a moment before you managed to come up with an answer, but you didn't know how to get out of this situation and turn it into a joke, as you usually did. Maybe you just didn't want to get out of it? Just like you didn't want to let him go when he helped you get up from the table after he'd paid for dinner and the two of you were in a cab. Not to mention when you almost fell down and the man caught you in his arms, but there was still a barrier between the two of you—an invisible wall—the only line that kept you apart. The line that was too dangerous to cross, but too tempting not to think about what lay behind it.

By the time the cab pulled up at the American Gardens Building, you were half asleep on Bateman's shoulder, his Lancome cologne not helping at all, making your mind even more cloudy. But you did your best to get out of the car without his help, letting the cool fresh air bring you some relief and clarity. 

In the elevator, Patrick began to mumble about his musical preferences, but you didn't really pay attention because your brain was overworked trying to come up with a plan B in case things went too far. 'As if they hadn't gone too far already,' your inner voice suddenly tried to break through the thick layers of alcohol, affection and uncontrollable desire.

Bateman's apartment looked exactly as you had imagined—opulent, stylish, and very minimalist. Everything seemed to be in its place, including you, standing next to the tall window in his living room.

"Not a bad view," you admitted, taking off the jacket of your suit. "Not Central Park, but not bad at all."

"Central Park?" Patrick asked, hiding in the kitchen, which was perfectly connected to the living room, but you couldn't see him behind the wall as he examined the large number of different kitchen knives.

"Yeah, you know, Paul Allen's apartment faces Central Park, looks really fancy," you didn't mean to hurt Bateman's feelings, but the moment you turned around and saw him, it was obvious that your words had reached him. "But, I really prefer your place...it's more modern for my taste."

Puzzled, Patrick didn't hurry to join you in the living room, his thin fingers never ceasing to slide up and down the sharp blade in his hand, but at the very last moment, the man put the knife back in its place. With deliberate steps, he walked out of the kitchen and approached his stereo system.

"Really?" He asked in disbelief, as if his life depended on your answer.

Such a reaction from him was oddly appealing, the vulnerability, the desperation in his brown eyes. This was a level of satisfaction that no drug could ever match. Meanwhile, Bateman turned on the music, the charming voice of Phil Collins filling the room as "Invisible Touch" began to play.

The man was examining the tape in his hands when you slowly approached and gently cupped his face, inducing him to look at you. "Yes, I do," you confirmed your previous words, and when Patrick didn't flinch from your touch, you decided to go on, tracing your finger along his sensual lips, fighting the urge to kiss them here and now. "Speaking of preferences," you removed your hand only to place it on the lapel of his suit. "Would you be a good boy and give me a full tour of your apartment, including the bedroom?"

In any other situation, you would probably die from shame at saying something like that, but not now. Not with him, because no sooner had your question escaped your lips than you noticed that his hands were shaking, and the CD was about to fall out of them, so you had to gently grab it and pull it out of his hands. Bateman reminded you of a man struggling with addiction, every twitch of his plump lips, every furrow of his perfect eyebrows spoke volumes about the undeniable affection between the two of you, an affection you were both too exhausted to fight and hide.

Without further ado, you placed the CD on top of the stereo and pressed Patrick against the nearest wall, holding the lapels of his Valentino suit and sealing his hot mouth with yours, opening it wider with your tongue, so eager to taste him again after such a long wait.

"Mmhm," he purred into the kiss, his hands desperately wrapped around your waist, then going lower to cradle your hips, groping and squeezing a little too hard so that you had to bite his lip to make him stop, but the man just growled and pushed you closer, your groins rubbing against each other in the most lewd way possible. "Bedroom...go to the bedroom...and wait for me there."

Bateman's words right after the kiss sounded like nonsense, which you found oddly arousing. With a foxy smile, you licked his cheek, then his neck, almost biting the artery and sucking on the reading mark. "No, no, no, Bateman," you shook your head, grabbing his neck slightly to kiss him again, but he did it first. Even now Patrick was trying to take the lead, your tongues fighting for control like two snakes entwining around each other. "I'm in no mood for games or waiting."

The moment you said it, Bateman lifted you with practiced ease as if you weighed nothing, and you didn't even have a chance to protest as he began to move toward the closed room behind his white couch. In his arms, you finally felt complete, even if you let him take the lead for a while. Noticing the pair of panties on the glass coffee table, you wrapped your legs around him and buried your fingers in his silky hair, ruffling them and letting them fall on his forehead, making him look even hotter.

Jesus, you were on the verge of an explosion just from the foreplay alone.

Bateman's bedroom greeted you with stark white walls, the brightness of which was almost painful to look at as he turned on the light holding you with one arm, and the king-size bed on which he carefully placed you, but you didn't let him pull away, tugging at his tie and forcing him to lay on top of you.

"Fuck, look at you," Patrick grazed your earlobe before massaging your chest through your shirt and hovering over you. "So insatiable, aren't you? Running in circles like a trapped kitten."

Growling, you pulled him closer again to suck on his lower lip, letting your body rub against his so you could feel how hard he was, so painfully hard, considering the sound he made when you snaked your hand between his legs to cradle his bulge. "Are you gonna cum in your pants if I don't stop?"

With a determined persistence, you continued to massage his hard cock through the layers of his expensive clothes as you removed his jacket and then his suspenders, one by one. Bateman didn't interfere as he was also busy getting rid of your clothes without actually tearing them apart.

"Let me," you insisted as soon as you noticed him struggling to unbutton your shirt. "This is my favorite shirt, you know," you gasped, your own fingers trembling, making it difficult even for you to finally remove your shirt. "I don't want it to get torn."

When you finally got rid of the top part of your clothes, the sight of your exposed skin made Patrick grunt in hunger, and the next second the man was already sucking on your nipple, his muscular frame shaking on top of you from your teasing ministrations on his twitching dick and hard balls. Damn, you wanted to suck him dry as much as you wanted to ruin him until he forgot his own name.

"Don't like it anyway," Bateman muttered suddenly, holding your hands above your head. "You need to go to some... fashion shows... maybe you will have more free time in Chicago, considering Paul Allen offered you this job. I'm sure it would be some boring shit."

‘Good Lord, he mentioned him again…’ You rolled your eyes and turned away from his face, eliciting a low rumble from Patrick's massive chest. "What the fuck is wrong with Paul... are you... jealous of him or something?"

"Me?" he asked, confused and you took the opportunity to release your hands and roll over so that you were now on top of him. "I'm not the one bragging about having dinner with him in fucking Dorsia!"

Bateman sounded like a little boy who was upset that no one wanted to play with him, which made you giggle, but then you straddled him and opened his white shirt and removed his tie.

"The more you talk," you murmured as you ran your hands along the smooth skin of his torso, paying special attention to his toned pecs and abs. "The more you make me think you two had a history," you leaned down to teasingly lick his lips, your sneaky hands already working on the zipper of his pants. "But still, I don't care." In one swift motion, you pulled down his pants along with his boxers, watching his thick cock pop out, yearning for your attention. "Mhmm, the last time we were alone you worked me up really good, I wanna return the favor," your hands wrapped around the base of his beefy shaft, the small droplets of his pre-cum already covering its tip, forcing you to lick your lips in hunger. "If you have nothing else on your mind?"

Did you really care about his feelings since you asked him that question? 

The man beneath you was definitely growing impatient, his hands gripping your hips as if he was about to imprint his fingerprints on your skin if you were not wearing your pants. 

"Lie on your side," Bateman suggested suddenly. "Take off all your clothes and lie down here," he tapped the spot next to him and you stood up quickly, as if he had cast a spell on you. Never in your life did you get rid of your clothes faster than now. "Uh, what a cute ass you have, (y/n)."

You frowned at his words, giving him your dead stare as you slipped out of your underwear, giving him the full view—the glint in his hazel eyes was too much to ignore—so you turned around and presented yourself to him; Bateman couldn't help but lazily stroked himself, putting a hand under his head. 

"Tell me, Bateman," you began, your hands slowly sliding down your bare skin. "Have you been thinking about me all this time?" You cupped your ass, bending over a little so he could see the spot right between your legs. "Or have you found a way to forget things you don't want to remember?"

He swallowed hard and closed his eyes for a second. "I wish there was a way to forget." Patrick murmured and watched as you lay on your side in the 69 position, then he did the same, his hot breath scorching the soft flesh between your thighs. 

You wrapped your hands around his hips and eagerly took his drooling dick in your mouth, while he was lapping at your crotch. "Mm-fuck," you jerked against his face, your fingers digging deeper into his skin as Bateman feasted on you like the most delicious meal. "Me too, Bateman, m-me too."

Having said that, you swirled your tongue around the swollen tip of his veiny cock, causing a muffled moan to erupt from his mouth, its vibration sending shivers down the base of your spine, only spurring you on to go further, pushing his dick deeper into your mouth. Soon the room was filled with the soft, wet sounds of your shared oral pleasure, punctuated by soft but powerful moans and groans as you both teetered on the edge of ecstasy. Gripping your ass, Bateman responded to your actions with the same passion, devouring every drop of your flavor and giving you no chance to escape, his strong arms like ropes around your body. After giving his cock the attention it deserved, you decided to tease his heavy balls with light lapping on them, before slipping a finger inside his tight ass, you expected him to protest but instead you heard him moan and the next moment his hips began to move towards your penetrating movements.

"Good boy," you praised him, rolling your eyes at the way the man was sucking on your most sensitive spot. "Taking my finger so well..."

The coil in your lower abdomen was about to snap at any moment, but you still wanted more, you wanted to feel that cock inside you, even if it was going to rip you a apart. Breathlessly, you didn't even remember asking him about condoms, and how you managed to get out of bed and go to the closet, where you found a little box Bateman was talking about—its contents almost made you gasp in awe, so you decided to take it with you.

"Well, well," you crooned as you stepped back into the bedroom. "Should I ask you what this is or are you going to tell me?"

With a wide grin, you held out a large purple dildo, Patrick's eyes twitched and he gulped, leaning on his elbows. "I... I use it with hookers," the man confessed, licking his glistening lips covered with your juices. "Why?"

"Hmmm, you like watching women play with it?" You asked as you reached the bed. "How about actually using it and not just watching?"

Damn, you could swear you saw his breath catch in his throat, his muscles tense and his dick throbbing just at the mention of using that sex toy on him. 'So he likes that idea, what a naughty boy,' you chuckled to yourself and took your place on the bed next to him. "This is going to feel so good, baby," you brought the dildo to his lips, suggesting that he lick it for lubrication, and when he did, you could barely keep yourself from cumming, just from the sight of his tongue flicking around the tip of the silicone sex toy. "Get on your knees and let me take care of you."

"Fuck," Bateman cursed, but it was too late to turn back. Embarrassed but extremely aroused, the man got down on all fours and gave you full access to his firm ass, which you immediately fondled, spreading his buttocks and biting them one by one. "Mmh-hmm, (y/n)."

"Relax," you stroked his hips, kissing the lower part of his back just above the dimples that were too sexy to ignore. "God, you have such a beautiful body," you decided to praise him, knowing the effect it would have on him. "I would worship it forever if I could," which was only half true, or maybe...it was not. Leisurely, you showered his soft skin with little peaks here and there, dotting it with your marks of love, not even realizing that you were giving all of yourself to the process.

As you pressed the tip of the dildo against his puckered muscle ring, Patrick tensed at your touch, gripping the sheets and closing his eyes, so overwhelmed and confused at the same time, but your reassuring hand on his trembling one encouraged him to look back at you as you hovered over him to kiss his lips, his neck, his shoulder.

"(Y/n)," Bateman suddenly huffed through his clenched teeth. "I want you to..." he gasped as you flickered your wet finger around his tight asshole. "...fuck."

"You want me to feast on that delicious ass of yours?" You finished the sentence for him, grinning in pure gratification at his complete submission. "Is that what you want?"

"Yeah, y-yes," he grasped the sheets and positioned himself more comfortably on all fours— a clear sign that he was not used to this position and you couldn't miss it. "I want to feel your tongue... all over me."

"Shit, Bateman, you're a real sweet talker." With that you put the dildo on the bed next to you and before you knew it you were spreading his ass cheeks wide open to make a flat lick along his tight hole. "I wanna hear you," you gently but insistently probed his ass with your warm tongue, giving him several slaps on the buttocks that drove the man wild as you felt his velvet walls tighten around your tongue. "Good boy, c'mon, spread it out for me."

Blushing, Patrick used both hands to spread himself for your eager ministrations as you fucked him with your tongue while your hands traveled all around his hips before you wrapped one of them around his pulsating cock, fuck, he was so close, you could tell by the way his balls tensed when you gave them a slight squeeze.

"Don't cum until I let you," you commented and the next moment you were already pushing the sleek sex toy into his ass and this time he accepted it gradually, taking it in with ease—the sight made you gasp but you focused on giving him pleasure. "Tell me, Bateman, how does it feel?"

The question remained unanswered for a brief moment as you began to slid the dildo in and out, stimulating his prostate and causing him to shake and whimper in pure bliss, but when you decided to add fuel to the fire by jerking him off and sucking on his strained sac, Patrick could barely contain himself, his legs about to give way at any moment.

"F-fuck, a-aahhh, mmhhmm," he murmured into the pillow, his hands finding their way to your messy hair, gripping them almost to the point of pain. "I...c-can't...hold...it any longer," Bateman's wailing bounced off the walls of his luxurious bedroom, which had never seen anything like it before. "I..."

Though you wanted him to last longer, you were too overwhelmed yourself, feeling the string in your belly ready to burst. "Let it go," your words were like a balm to his ears as, just a moment later, his cock pulsed in your grasp, spraying loads of his thick cum across the Chinese sheets that Patrick had always been so fond of. "That's it…" You didn't stop fucking him with a dildo, nor did you stop pumping his throbbing dick, milking it until the last drop of his seed. "Good boy, you're such a good boy." 

Panting, you pulled out the sex toy, covered in his slick, and brought it to his trembling lips, inducing him to suck it before taking it into your mouth, feeling the mixture of tastes on the tip of your tongue. Then, Bateman rolled onto his back, desperately gasping for air, his cock still hard. That was fucking phenomenal, but you didn't comment, thinking about your own orgasm at last. Locking your eyes with Patrick's hazel ones, you touched yourself the moment he beckoned you over, and without words, you mounted his flushed, sweaty face, riding it as desperately as you could, using his tongue and lips without shame. Tilting your head back, you grabbed his head and almost clawed at his scalp, feeling your insides about to fucking explode from the tension. So when you peaked, your scream could be heard all over Bateman's apartment. The orgasms you had before were nothing compared to this. It took everything from you, it made you die and rise again.

The final chord of the parade of shameless lust was when you let him fuck you in a way you didn't even expect. Spooning you from behind after he put the condom on, the man lifted your leg and sheathed himself inside of you till the hilt, making you feel so full you had to wrinkle the fabric underneath, but that was just the beginning as Bateman pulled you closer, trapping you in his arms like a cocoon, his tongue sliding around your ear shell with undisguised affection,

"Mmhmm, fuck, you're...so perfect," the man whispered into your ear, setting up the pace and resting his hand between your legs for extra stimulation. "Holy fuck! I'm cumming again, omh-shit..."

"Fuck m-me, yeah, just...l-like that...a-ahhh," you coaxed him to fuck you harder as you suddenly found yourself on the verge of climaxing again. "Gimme everything, baby, a-awww...goshhhhhhhh," you were the first to fall over the principle of pleasure, twitching along his body as if you were hit by the electric shock, all your nerves were on fire. "Bateman, mmhm-fuck-fuck! Your dick feels s-so good.."

Your vivid orgasm became the last straw for his second release as you felt him bite at your neck, his buffed frame shaking in spasms of pure rapture, you even had to hold back a scream from how painfully Patrick's hands squeezed your hips, but it was pleasurable pain of being ruined, of being fucked into a wet mess. Barely breathing, you didn't even remember how you passed out from exhaustion and for the first time in the last few days you fell asleep completely satisfied and happy.

When the first rays of sunlight crept through the blinds into Bateman's bedroom, you were already awake, as was he, but since you were lying with your back to his face, you didn't notice until the man kissed your shoulder, snuggled up against your neck, and made you roll over to face him.

As you did so, you dared to look directly into the brown eyes still clouded by the aftermath of your shared pleasure. "Hey." He muttered in a husky voice.

"Hey," you murmured back, hugging the pillow. "Did you sleep well?"

“Surprisingly—yes," the man stretched his arms, flexing his muscles and checking himself in the mirror on the other side of the room, which you hadn't even noticed. "(Y/n), I want you to go to the office and tell everyone that you're not going anywhere."

Shocked, you blinked several times, not knowing what to say as you hadn't expected anything like this.

With a nervous chuckle that turned into a hearty laugh, you rolled onto your back before sitting up on the bed. "Oh God, you're such a little Delulu, it's even funny," you looked at him—his face was nothing but a blank space without any visible emotions. "Did you really think that random sex would change my mind about changing jobs?" You chuckled again, louder this time. "I mean, the sex was really good, but... it's not like I'm going to give everything for this, you know?" With that, you got up from the bed and wrapped a blanket around yourself. "Can I take a shower?”

Trapped in the thought that only he could know, Patrick rolled onto his back, his eyes fixed on an invisible spot on the ceiling above him. "Yes," he murmured, barely audible. "Do whatever you want."

Walking towards the bathroom, you suddenly stopped and turned half around. "You better forget it," you said, savoring every word and finally returning the favor. "Maybe ask Paul Allen for advice," you grinned as you watched Bateman close his eyes in a feeble attempt to distance himself from everything that had happened. "Maybe he knows something about memory reboot machines that can help."

Without waiting for his answer, you continued on your way to the bathroom. Even though you were pleased with yourself, your revenge didn't taste sweet, but bitter, and its bitterness would remain on the tip of your tongue even after you washed yourself clean under the hot streams of water.

But the game was worth the candle, as they said.

Was it?

P.S. Thank you for reading until the end! I don’t have a taglist. You can follow my side blog @makeyoumineagain and turn on notifications to know when I update!

[illdowhatiwantthanks]

The End (The Surprise, Part 25)

Emily Prentiss x fem!reader Warnings: mentions of afab body parts, baby times, emotional times, explicit language (let me know if I've missed anything!) Word count: 2.3k

Summary: Everything you've ever wanted, everything Emily's ever wanted–it's happening. ❤️

NOTE: You guys 😭😭😭 I've literally had so much fun writing this series! I know it's not the end end. I'll keep adding chapters as I feel like it. But still. This is a bittersweet one to finish up. I hope you enjoy it as much as I have. ❤️

The End

You blinked awake, and it was as if your senses, your body itself, were restarting after a hard reboot. Your brain couldn’t quite catch up with the bright lights, the beeping of the machines, the throbbing pain below your belly…

Your breath caught in your throat. Your belly. It had shrunk, not completely, but it was empty, you knew. You coughed and winced, glancing around the room so quickly you made yourself dizzy, your brain seemingly unable to take in any of the visual information. You felt tears spring to your eyes, a cold panic seize your chest; you could hear your heart rate monitor beep faster, more urgently, until alarms were going off. Where was the baby!? Something was wrong, something had gone terribly, terribly wrong. She was gone. She was lost.

But, then, something familiar, finally. A voice you recognized. Emily’s: soft and gentle and comforting, the way she always sounded when you were scared and she was trying to calm you down. 

“Hey, hey,” she cooed, and your eyes swam as her face came into view. You were so confused and you felt sick and your stomach hurt and your baby… You choked out a sob and Emily gently grasped your face, kissing your eyelids. “It’s okay, honey. You’re okay.” She had huge, dark circles under her eyes, like she hadn’t been sleeping, and when your eyes focused, you could see that she was on the verge of crying, too. And that terrified you.

You couldn’t seem to get any words out, but managed to place your hand over your stomach, looking into Emily’s eyes to ask a question you weren’t sure you wanted the answer to.

Emily wiped tears from under your eyes and sniffled. “Baby, she’s fine. She’s just fine. She’s sleeping right there.” Emily pointed to the chair behind her. Beside it was an elevated box, an incubator, and inside, just barely poking out, you could see her skin, her little foot, minuscule and perfect.

You sobbed in relief and Emily kissed your forehead, wiping her own tears away before running a hand through your hair. “She’s okay, honey.” Her voice broke as she looked at you. “You scared us, you know that?”

You pulled Emily toward you, so you could press your forehead to hers, could just breathe her in. She was so relieved, had been so scared, her body literally shook with it. You kissed the side of her head, holding her close.

You cleared your throat and looked again at the incubator, shocked at how your stomach had shifted from being sick with worry to being sick with excitement.

“A girl?” you asked, voice hoarse from the anesthesia. Your eyes twinkled with mischief as you waited for Emily’s answer.

She nodded, grinning and shaking her head at the long-running joke. “You were right. You want to hold her?”

You nodded vigorously, trying to sit up further and wincing at the pain in your abdomen.

“Careful, careful!” Emily exclaimed, lunging forward to help you. “Be gentle with yourself, please, baby,” she insisted, watching you as if you could break at any moment.

Emily washed her hands thoroughly, then doused them in hand sanitizer before squirting an ungodly amount of sanitizer in her hands and bringing it to you. She rubbed it into your skin, then pulled your shirt open a bit so that your chest was exposed.

You waited, barely breathing, as Emily carefully pulled the incubator over. She opened the little door and reached in gingerly to grab the baby, cradling her carefully and kissing her forehead.

“Eve,” she whispered, voice thick with emotion. “Meet your mama, sweet pea.”

Emily’s eyes were full of tears again–and so were yours–as she carefully placed the sleepy baby on your chest. You sniffed, blinking tears away as you cradled your daughter’s tiny, warm body. Eve gurgled and wriggled and blinked her eyes open. She wrapped her hand around your pointer finger and you giggled. Nothing had ever felt more right, more perfect in the world, than Eve resting on your chest, than her little heart beating against yours, than holding her here while Emily sat propped on the bed beside you, running her hand through your hair and kissing your head every few moments.

“Hi, pretty girl,” you whispered to the baby. Eve coughed a bit and started to cry and you patted her back gently. “Oh, shh. It’s okay, Evie. You’re okay, baby girl.”

You weren’t sure how long you sat like that, you and Emily, just watching her, just beaming to one another every time Eve moved, every time she made a new adorable sound, every time she yawned or blinked or squeezed her little fists. But it wasn’t long enough. You didn’t know that you’d ever get enough of this.

Dr. Delgado came in and smiled at you all. “How are all my ladies doing this morning?”

You grinned so wide your cheeks hurt. You pressed your hand into hers and looked into her eyes. “Thank you. So much.”

“You’re welcome,” she said, and by her voice you could tell she really meant it. “Now, Y/N, you lost quite a bit of blood during the c-section and the resulting surgery to repair your uterine lining. I’m terribly sorry to have to tell you this, but… you will not be able to have more children.”

Emily squeezed your shoulder, and both she and Dr. Delgado waited a bit, as if waiting for you to break down. But you didn’t feel sad, at least not right now. You had Eve. You and Emily had a child. That’s what you had set out wanting, and that’s what you had. You couldn’t imagine needing anything or anyone else besides the two girls you had with you right now.

You nodded. “Okay.”

“It also might take a bit longer for your c-section incision to heal than most, since your body’s healing internal damage, too. All that to say, let Emily help you. Understood?”

“Understood,” you confirmed.

“Alright,” Dr. Delgado consulted her tablet. “Some official business now. Emily, now that Y/N’s awake, do you feel comfortable putting the name on the birth certificate?”

“I do,” she said, her hands never leaving you.

“Alright, so obviously, first name ‘Eve.’ Last name?”

“Prentiss,” you told her. You’d both decided that a long time ago.

“Any middle name?”

You looked at Emily and she nodded toward you. “Your call, honey. You won.”

You stared down at Eve’s sweet, crinkled face and smiled. “Julien.”

Emily sucked in a little breath beside you, furrowing her eyebrows when you looked at her.

You shrugged. “It’s can be a girl’s name. Your family should be a part of her name, too.”

“Eve Julien Prentiss,” Dr. Delgado repeated. “Is that right?”

You both nodded, and Emily planted a kiss on your cheek.

“Alright. She was born yesterday, August 24, at 5:42 AM. Four pounds, one ounce. 17.1 inches. All in all, she’s doing very well. I’d like to monitor her for at least 48 more hours and, ideally, I’d like her latching and breastfeeding, at least some, before you take her home, if we can make it happen. We can always supplement with formula as needed, though. Right now, she’s got a nasal cannula to help her breathe, but she’s doing very well with it, so I think we should have you guys home within the week, at most. Alright?” She set down the tablet and gestured toward you. “While I’m here, you want to try breastfeeding?”

“Yes!” you answered excitedly. “Please.”

Dr. Delgado handed you a moon-shaped pillow and placed it around your waist. “Okay. So we’re gonna send you home with one of these. It’ll help you stay comfortable, especially while you’re recovering. You’re gonna want to do what’s called a football hold while your incision is healing…”

She gingerly lifted Eve off your chest and positioned her under your arm, just like you were holding a football, and showed you how to hold her head up. “You’re gonna kind of lift the breast up,” Dr. Delgado explained. “And then you bring her to the nipple. You almost want her nose to touch the breast.”

You followed her instructions, using your other hand to press Eve toward your nipple. Emily watched behind you, her fingers rubbing the bottoms of Eve’s feet. You frowned a bit as the baby tried to squirm away, twisting her head.

“Here,” Dr. Delgado suggested. “Try squeezing the tissue around the nipple to make, like, a nipple sandwich. Then brush it against her mouth. She should kind of yawn… Yes! Just like that!”

Eve opened her mouth wide, and you gently pressed her toward your nipple, gasping softly as she took hold and began to suckle. Her little mouth was warm and firm against you.

You smiled and turned to Emily, who was looking at you like she might start crying again.

“Well, that was easy,” Dr. Delgado said, clapping her hands together. “I tell you what, if all babies latched that easily, new parents would spend half the amount of time in the hospital.” She stood and made some notes on her tablet before moving toward the door. “I’ll leave you all alone for a bit. She’ll unlatch when she’s done, you can burp her, and she’ll likely want to take a nap afterward.”

“Thank you, Dr. Delgado,” you called after her.

“Thank you!” Emily echoed.

When the three of you were alone again, Emily wrapped her arms around your neck from behind, planting kiss after kiss on the side of your face.

“Oh, honey, you look so beautiful,” she said, nearly breathless. “Both of you. You know what…”

Emily stood and rifled around in her purse for her phone. When she had it, she stood back and held it out, as if to take a photo.

“Hey!” you protested. “I thought we said no hospital pics!?”

Emily gave you a pointed look. “We said no labor photos. And I kept my word on that! Honey, you’re too pretty not to take a picture of. I mean, look at you!” Emily’s eyes were suddenly swimming again. “Look at my beautiful girls!”

You let Emily take her pictures, knowing that you’d probably be glad to have them later.

A few minutes later, as Emily was scrolling through the photos with a discerning eye–“Baby, do you mind if I post one of these? …Not the boob ones! Just one of the others? Oh! Could we take one of all three of us?” –Eve unlatched from your nipple and yawned, spilling milk out the side of her mouth, which you dabbed up with your hospital gown.

“Hey, Em,” you called to her. “Could you come here and take her for a second? I need to burp her, but I’ve got to move a little, my leg’s falling asleep.”

She was at your side faster than you could finish the request, lifting herself into the hospital bed next to you, and gently taking Eve from you.

“Okay,” you said, fighting off a yawn. The adrenaline of meeting your daughter was wearing off, and the exhaustion of meds and healing and new motherhood was hitting all at once. You tapped Emily’s arm. “I can take her back.”

“I can burp her, honey,” Emily told you, reaching slightly for a burp cloth and draping it over her shoulder. “Why don’t you rest for a while?”

“Are you sure?” you asked, already lowering yourself, slowly, painfully, so that your face rested on Emily’s lap.

“I’m sure,” she said, running one hand through your hair while the other tapped rhythmically against Eve’s back. “It’s not just you now, honey. I can finally pull my weight.”

You squeezed her thigh, smiling against her. “Oh, Em. Baby, you’ve pulled more than your weight. The whole time.”

Before you had the chance to say anything else, you were conked out. So conked out that you were drooling, even snoring a bit. Emily smiled and shook her head at you.

Eve let out a burp that seemed almost too big for her body, and Emily chuckled. “Oh, good job, sweet pea,” she whispered, kissing Eve’s head. “That was a big one. Let’s not wake up Mama, though.” Emily patted Eve’s back for a bit longer, then noticed the deepening of the baby’s breath, the rise and fall of her tiny chest. Eve was asleep, too.

Emily watched you both, her heart filled with so much love she thought it might burst. And to think, just 24 hours ago, she’d been so close to losing you both. She’d never been more thankful in her life, never more determined to keep people safe and happy than she was you and Eve.

In a moment of inspiration, she fished her phone out of her pocket, and held it above her head, positioning all three of you in the photo. You, curled asleep on her lap and Eve sleeping softly on her chest beneath her hand.

She typed out a caption for social media:

My girls ❤️

She couldn’t help it. You were, both of you, too good not to share. And she’d gotten about a million calls from the BAU, not to mention your mom and even her mom, asking for photos and updates. She pressed post and then threw the phone to the side, content for now just to be. She would never take you for granted again, knowing she could have lost everything yesterday. But instead, she had gained everything. Everything she’d ever wanted, here in this room, in this bed. Forever hers. Her girls. She was the luckiest woman in the world.

[the-rebel-archivist]

Finally finished Veilguard a few days ago and took some time to process and put my thoughts in order. In brief: 8/10 game as a whole, a really fantastic gaming experience, but 5 or even 4/10 as a dragon age game since it does no meaningful exploration of any nuance or moral complexity and seems to have forgotten what made Thedas distinct. My thoughts, critical and positive, coming from a place of love for the series with little to no spoilers:

Thedas has always been special to me because it was a nuanced world. Different groups had different opinions based on their pasts. City elves and the dalish had divergent histories. Injustice against magic was common, but you could understand the justification for it even when you didn’t agree. Now, the worldbuilding is flattened. A mageocracy is fine, it’s only bad apples. Slavery is never addressed. City and dalish elves are basically the same but one lives in the forest. There’s no conflict about what’s best from each individuals’ perception, all groups are monoliths.

“Elves won’t follow the gods just because they’re elves,” yes they would, in past lore. Perhaps not all but some would - these are their Creators. The game refuses to deal with religious belief in any meaningful way, to the point that I don't know if its impact is fully understood. Dalish religion is as much about cultural preservation as religion and it would be CRUSHING to lose that connection to the past when it had been all you could cling to for thousands of years.

And no, seeking out relics of Arlathan would not make up for the foundation of your society shattering and what that would mean to the dalish. Bellara being guilty that her gods are evil is not the takeaway I expected when I thought the dalish would explore that everything they believed was a lie. I'd also like to briefly comment on how an elf can comment that they weren’t raised dalish but adopted their tattoos. Their closed practice tattoos. Closed even to city elves unless they fully joined a clan. Removing cultural boundaries didn’t make the material less 'problematic', it just created a new blind spot.

“They’d never sanitize the Crows” I said before release. Assassins who walked the line between murderer and hero depending on perspective. But in this game they give you absolute truth: they’re freedom fighters. Responsible government who, the mob is benevolent and that is never subverted. They see themselves as the 'good guys' and so they are.

“They wouldn’t put powerful mages in charge of the shadow dragons” I said. “Surely they will explore the nuance of Neve having the privilege of magic in a mageocracy even when she comes from a lower class beyond ‘everyone is welcome in the shadow dragons’.” “Surely if Maevaris is connected her intersectionality as a magister and altus and trans woman will come up - not what Tevinter expects, helping with change, but still privileged and upper class. Surely low class non mages and slaves would be leading the Shadow Dragons, not the powerful being benevolent.”

But no. All factions in the game are black and white, good and evil, no moral complexity. The bad people want power and collect bad people who want power and only bad people do bad things. The antagonists I liked most were the ones with a motivation beyond simply power and they were few.

And that’s setting aside the fact that all of the mystery and fantasy was removed from the setting by the end. The things that mattered before, the religious conflicts, the approaches to history? All false or meaningless now that we know absolute truth. Everything that set Dragon Age apart from generic fantasy was flattened. All of the lore for the world that I had spent hours, days, years in and creating fanfic for became simple groups of good and bad, subjectivity replaced by objective truth. It’s not a world I want to unravel and explore anymore.

That hurts more than the slap in the face that was every cameo and past reference. If they wanted a soft reboot, why include them at all? Every time I saw or heard about a past character or event I felt hurt and angry and it actively harmed my experience of the game. When the choices are pared down to only do something "meaningful" with them and then that meaningful thing is a codex that had been so disdained in dev comments? I do feel pretty let down. Especially when that codex isn’t even personalized.

They never use Rook or the inquisitor’s first name in text once. Vocal I get, but no codex? The Inquisitor, a person depersonalized into a symbol, signing off “Yrs. The Inquisitor” when we input their name in CC was a twist of the knife I didn’t expect. It’s like every time I lower my expectations to grant grace they need to be lowered yet again.

Similarly, the romances in the “most romantic game yet” are paper thin throughout the game depending on your choice, with few chances to truly connect on an emotional level and have deep conversations in some routes. It’s not all about kissing but having the chance to say how you feel, or try to.

But that’s part of a larger problem, that this is a “found family” but Rook is the outsider in it. Rook isn’t asked how they’re handling things or about who they are or what they want except by Solas. The team needs them to fix problems but has little interest in giving back. The companions are lovely, but I can’t help wishing they were friends with me and not just each other. Or wanted to romance me and not just each other, as they begin to flirt before I can and have more banter comments than the player romance. At least if no one got me I know Davrin got me.

These last comments are the reason it’s 8/10 as a game rather than 10/10 for me - the lore I care about but others won’t. The lack of connection is a genuine issue, along with how unbalanced it is depending on romance. I just feel sad at the lost potential to reflect and gain support from companions.

On a positive note, this is the most fun Dragon Age game I’ve ever played. The gameplay is top notch and combat is so fluid and fun. I felt excited to fight rather than dreading the next battle. Really getting into the roleplay of a slippery rogue

The environments are so gorgeous. Lighting, animation, level design, sound design, all spectacular. I’m bad with maps and yet I never got lost and always managed to find my way around. Secret passages to treasure were just the right length to be satisfying. The puzzles were exactly the right amount of investment for the reward. I never felt frustrated by them but also not disappointed by the simple ones, there was a good balance. I had a lot of fun uncovering them. So many areas looked like a perfect representation of thedosian places I had never been to and wanted to visit.

Every time I was in the necropolis it felt like coming home. Maybe it’s because the lore was the most similar to past lore, maybe it’s just because it was cool, but I loved being there. I loved the wisps most of all. And I loved Emmrich’s journey and sympathetic exploration of death. The Hossberg Wetlands were also a standout area. Absolutely horrible (complimentary). Evka and Antoine my beloveds and the environment storytelling was fantastic. Like a hideous combination of the Fallow Mire and Chateau d’Onterre and I was so there for it. Davrin’s story broke my last flight loving heart.

The set pieces and narrative flow in the major battles and main story missions is really wonderful. I also did enjoy the faction reactivity, even if there were few chances to explore the intersectionality of being a particular lineage with a particular faction. I’ll make our House proud Viago!

It’s such a fun game that when I play I can almost forget all of the things that I dislike until a codex or cameo punches me in the face. It has such great gameplay that I can finally discuss DA with my partner who refused to play the other games in the series. But what a monkey’s paw. I know from their previous work that they can foster nuance. From the art book that their instincts were there from the beginning. But somewhere after multiple reboots they made a world with contradiction and complexity removed, more reactive to fan discourse than to telling a complex narrative.

It kills me because if the nuance and subjectivity and moral complexity had been there, I would have considered this the best Dragon Age game ever made. It will always be the most fun. But it is legitimately more fun for people who don’t know lore than people who do, and that is soul-crushing. It's the most beautiful Thedas has ever been, and the least like Thedas it has ever felt.

I’ve played it once. I already started a replay. I enjoy the game a lot when I am playing it, overall. But I miss Thedas, and I miss that the “world worth saving” that I cared for is a slate wiped clean and this new world is a more simplistic place.

[dronebiscuitbat]

Oil is Thicker Then Blood (Part 48)

Twenty minutes later, N came back online, he was dizzy, his entire body felt as though it was filled with radio static and his core was stuttering, seemingly still fluttering from what it had just experienced.

There was a warm body on top of him, collapsed on his chest, his arm moved on its own to wrap around her, his breath seemed to catch up and come out in some astonished half-choke.

Had that really just happened?

“U-uzi?” He found his voice though it was horse and husky, and he got no response, his girlfriend continuing to lie there limp. He began to get worried, had he overloaded her somehow? Fried her processors?

He lifted her up to face him, her visor reading [Reboot, Data Overload!] but she was very clearly still online, they were also still linked together, the wire shifting as what it was connected to moved. His worry dissipated, she was fine, just still rebooting.

In the meantime, he attempted to disconnect, he lightly pulled on the wire only to find that her port had locked him in, leaving him stuck there until she woke up. So he leaned back into the pillow and looked at the ceiling, basking in the afterglow.

Uzi's system gave a beep before a low groan left her lips, clearly feeling the same dizzy feeling that had hit him when he first woke up, N went to hold her steady, one hand on her back and the other on her cheek, tilting her head up to look at him.

“Welcome back.” He smiled at her, a laugh tugging on his lips as she slowly looked up at him, embarrassed at herself, even so, her eyelights seemed to smile at him.

“Hey…” She replied back, her voice soft and small, she tried to pull back, either to get off him or just to get a better look when the short cable connecting them stopped her, painfully yanking on both of them.

“Oh… we're still…” She said, still a little out of it, she lightly brushed over the wire, fingers tangling in it, N watched her curiously, she was acting… off.

“Are you okay?”

At that she seemed to look at him, really look at him, her eyelights scanning every inch of his face before something overtook her and she kissed him. It wasn't hungry or urgent like before, but it was passionate and they both found themselves melting into it before she pulled away.

He chuckled as they remained with their visors pressed together, it was clear that neither of them wanted to get up just yet, he wasn't sure he'd be able to anyway, his legs felt numb.

N couldn't help but run his hands along her silicone softly, in which she replied by humming in contentment and caressing the seam of his visor with her thumb.

Whatever enjoyment they got out of holding each other like this seemed to be enhanced, Uzi's edges were nonexistent, leaving her as vulnerable as she would ever be and N's anxiety had run off to find it, because that was gone for the moment too.

“I love you so much.” He almost whispered in her ear, causing her to giggle lightly and bury her head into the crook of his neck, he could feel her smiling against him, making a similar smile tug the corners of his mouth.

“I love you too.” She replied equally as softly, and she finally sat up as far as thr cable would allow, she grabbed the end of in before sighing and moving her hand directly underneath to where it plugged in. There was a small click. And they were disconnected, the wire immediately snapped back inside the compartment over his core, causing him to wince as it smacked his casing.

“S-sorry, probably should have warned you.” She manually closed her compartment, before reaching up and doing the same to his, the low buzzing of his core ceased, and the radio static of his limbs seemed to let up a little.

“It's alright.” He leaned forward and held her before taking them both back down to lay on the bed, she was still mostly on top of him, although now her head rested on his chest.

“Did that… really just happen?” She asked after a moment, sounding like she didn't belive herself, he gave her a breathy laugh and used his hand to massage her back, he felt… complete? satisfied? They had become one, he had known her every thought and feeling, and she knew his. It was… incredible.

“Mmhm.” He replied, squeezing her closer even if it was physically impossible, he gave her a kiss on the forehead and buried his face into her hair.

Had she always had a smell? Because right now she smelled like freshly forged metal and citrus, a strange but oddly pleasant smelling combo.

“That was amazing…” He breathed out, causing her to laugh again, she looked up at him, nervously glancing to the side.

“Good. I… was afraid I was bad… or something.”

He blinked, almost confused on how or why she'd ever think that.

“It wasn't bad, it wouldn't have ever been bad. It was with you, and you're so, so amazing.” He immediately voiced all these things, making her blush and kiss his visor again, which in turn made him lean down and kiss hers.

“You were too…”

“I didn’t really do anything.”

She looked at him incredulously.

“Are you serious? You wrote, I love you, like fifty times over my display code. That's all I could see!”

Oh, well he was being a little clumsy…

“At least you liked it?”

“Of course I did… you goob.”

Then there was silence for another few minutes, riding the high of their afterglow together, with Uzi ending up tracing small shapes on his chest and around his core, avoiding actually touching it.

N smiled, she was being so soft, her walls had been completely demolished for him, Even before, she would have been embarrassed she was touching him so freely, now she was doing it with a small smile on her face.

“That kinda tickles Zi.” He hummed as he pretty much did the same to her back, avoiding the scars in favor of tracing around them.

She stopped, not responding but curling into him and purring, triggering his own.

Then, as if waiting for the perfect moment. A wail broke through the house like a thunderclap, alerting to two parents to their charge, who had woken up alone on the couch and was very much not happy about it.

“Mm. She has your attitude.” N laughed as Uzi slapped him lightly, slowly rolling off him to crawl out of bed even if she was initially unsteady.

“Hush.”

She got dressed, although only in her skull pajamas and made her way to the living room where Tera was beating her fists into the couch cushions in a genuine tantrum.

“Oh Tera honey, it's okay.” Uzi scooped her up, black blanket and all and the toddler almost immediately settled down, looking up at her mother, albeit with squinted eyes, almost saying “how dare you leave me alone!”

“I'm sorry Jellybean, daddy and I lost track of time.” Uzi nuzzled her daughters visor, causing the girl to let out a peel of giggles as she did it back, clearly not holding much of a grudge.

“Least you don't hold a grudge like me…”

There was a knock at the door. Making Uzi jump and Tera to immediately look at the door in curiosity, it used to just make her cry, but at least now she seemed to understand that it meant someone new was here.

She looked down at herself, her pajamas ruffled her hair a complete wreck. She sighed, hopefully it was someone she knew, this wouldn't be as awkward.

“Coming.”

She made her way to the door, looking over at N who was still in the process of getting dressed, buttoning every single button on his coat took awhile…

She used her solver to pull the door shut for him, then she let the front door swing open. Tera resting mostly in one arm as the other was free to press the button.

Red eyes looked back.

She jumped back, startled. Her other hand immediately flew up to protect Tera's head as her tail immediately wrapped around mother and child, spines flared out and ready to impale the intruder.

The intruder also jumped back, and Uzi suddenly realized that the red eyes didn't belong to who she thought they did. For starters, this drone was clearly a dude.

“Sorry for the scare man! I'm Guy, I uh, work with N?”

Next ->

[oodlyenough]

apollo justice: ace attorney thoughts

over the weekend I finished playing AA4 so I wanted to try to put my thoughts in order. much to think about etc

spoilers for the whole game obv, but i haven't played AA5 or AA6 yet so any mention of those are speculation lol

I had heard some pretty mixed reactions to AA4 and I had a lot of reservations going in. It's also probably the AA game I've played that I've been the most spoiled for, which is a shame but probably an unavoidable consequence of waiting for the port while engaging with the fandom. I don't usually like being spoiled but I think knowing the broad strokes of what to expect actually helped here. I can imagine an AU where I blitzed through the first trilogy and onto 4 with no idea of what was coming and being... very upset and disappointed by the direction it took. Having several months to brace for things like Phoenix's disbarment, the 7 year gap, Trucy, etc definitely softened those blows and made me more amenable to them than I would've been otherwise.

Cases

For the most part I thought the puzzle solving was good and the pacing was solid. The puzzles were mostly challenging enough to be satisfying to solve but not so challenging as to be infuriating, and I don't think I needed a walkthrough at all. 4-1 is one of the best tutorial cases in the franchise so far (though I'd give the edge to 3-1) and 4-4 was a really cool finale. The middle two cases tbh I also found fairly charming, and there's usually a least one case in the middle that seems to drag forever, so that was a pleasant surprise. I played Investigations 1 right before this, and I thought both the puzzles and pacing in that game were frankly horrible, so AA4 won a lot of points just with that.

I did think Turnabout Corner and Serenade would be more relevant in the grand scheme of things. The half-spoilers I knew had me expecting a much bigger web of conspriacy than we ended up with -- I expected it to be more than coincidence that Phoenix got hit by a car, more than coincidence that the Borginian egg coccoons are related to poison etc ... like... I fully assumed this was going to tie into the atroquinine plot. But I guess not ... ? Lol

Characters

The new main cast are all very likable, despite my initial reluctance to have a new main cast to begin with. Klavier was an interesting change of pace as prosecutor, in that he wasn't particularly antagonistic outside of the court, nor was he particularly preoccupied with winning, but he was still fun and challenging enough to face off against. Trucy was fun and delightfully bonkers as all assistants should be. Apollo's longsuffering exasperation was hilarious. Ema is the BEST I loved having her as the detective I wish she was there all the time.

I loved Beanix, for the most part. I can see why he rubs some people the wrong way, and tbh I'm glad his last canon outing isn't ... this. But I didn't find him wildly out of character, or at least, when he was feeling "out of character" vs the trilogy it made sense given the intervening events. I also thought it was fun to see him from the outside and see what a galaxybrain 5d chess master he is. I do wish we'd gotten to see more genuine moments of him with Trucy.

Kristoph was fun as a villain, though I have to say fandom led me to believe he was much more of a mastermind puppeteer than he seemed to be in reality. I was expecting a whole decade worth of conspiracies! Instead he fucked up once and struggled to fix it for seven years, lol. I also found the Kristoph/Phoenix relationship a) very fascinating, b) not really what I'd been led to believe by fandom (shocker). I like the canon more though -- I like that instead of being a retread of the Dollie betrayal-from-someone-you-love it was two guys who hate each other being forced to play nice as part of their own schemes.

Criticism

I think it's fairly obvious AA4 was meant to be a soft reboot of the series, to pivot away from the trilogy cast and set up our new heroes in Apollo, Trucy, and I guess Klavier. I think this is probably the entire explanation behind Maya and Edgeworth (and others but lbr those are the big two)'s conspicuous absence... but that doesn't make their absence any less conspicuous. I can squint and forgive neither of them being there when Phoenix is accused of murder, even though I find that insane. I can squint around Maya maybe being off in Kurain during the Enigmar trial, even though I think they could've used a line of dialogue to explain it. But then we started playing past-Phoenix for huge portions of investigation and that started to fall apart for me. Sure, maybe he's pushing his friends away because he's depressed, or maybe he wants to keep Maya out of things because he thinks it's dangerous, or whatever -- you could at least throw in a line or two saying as much. Not mentioning them at all and setting AA4 so closely after AA3, where Phoenix fell through a bridge to save Maya and Edgeworth chartered a private jet, just feels ridiculous.

I also think, at the end of the day, the story here was focused on and pivoting around Phoenix. The core question of the game is "what the hell happened to/is up with Phoenix Wright?" I love Phoenix, so that alone isn't a negative -- except that I think it meant Apollo, Klavier and even Trucy felt underwritten. Trucy and Klavier have such personal stakes in the unfolding events with the Gramaryes and Kristoph, but we only spend a little time and hints on how that might influence Trucy, who mostly falls into the AA weird girl pattern of brushing off major trauma instantly. (Maya got this a lot too in the original trilogy.)

Klavier ... I like Klavier, but they did not do much with him. How did he feel about Kristoph going to jail? He doesn't seem to hold it against Apollo, which is uh, noble, but perhaps not believable. He says he values honesty and truth but do we know why?

Apollo, likable as he was, felt like a passenger in his "own" game, rather than a major character. He doesn't even solve much of the stuff happening in the big overarching mystery -- he is Phoenix's avatar in court, presenting evidence and clues Phoenix left for him. Unlike Trucy and Klavier, who I am pretty sure take a back seat from now on, I guess Apollo still has two more games to try and flesh himself out ... lol but I also know fan reception of those two is not great, so my expectations there are minimal.

Overall

A really solid game that I enjoyed playing, though I can see why it's controversial and not some people's favourite, if they really loved the trilogy. I think it's debatable whether this was the best/only way to continue the series after AA3. And I am excited to read and write a billion 7 year gap fics now.

[onewomancitadel]

Major spoilers for Death's End, the final book of the Remembrance of Earth's Past trilogy beneath the cut.

So about that terrarium...

My intial somewhat dismayed reading was that of an uncharacteristic, hackneyed sentimentality: even when the books took such an indulgence, there was always a cynical chaser. You don't get to experience the fantastical sense of romantic love without Luo Ji's understanding of women (or lack thereof) and the belief that people only love imaginations of each other and stay together so long as they don't conflict with reality. (This is probably key to the fact that the star-crossed lovers never meet in Death's End, neither of them being disabused of their fantasies. It's juvenile).

Suffice it to say, I really struggled with the ending. I struggled with Death's End in general; not necessarily the fundamental approach (I don't think undoing the victory was a totally bad idea, since I liked evolving that thesis past what it means to win) but the structure felt less whimsical and more directionless, a series of entries - quite literally - which felt disparate and never quite managed to hit that sense of dispassionate historical observation I think the text was trying to go for.

So the idea that there was this terrarium and message in a bottle left behind in a universe built specially for Cheng Xin was just kind of bizarre tonally. It felt silly.

I get it: the entries about Earth's past is right there in the trilogy title. But it felt very self-important; it didn't cohere with the overwhelming notion that humanity was 1. very irrelevant, 2. very bad at what it does, 2a. its women are very bad at what they do, and its men - if soft and weak - are similarly bad, 3. at every moment anything that isn't about pure survival is cut at the knees. Remembrance seems more like farce. Actually, the entire sequence on Pluto felt out of place, almost like we're meant to laugh at the little bugs trying to save their precious granules of sugar.

I was discussing the ending with my best friend and her family - actually I related all the events of the books to them, somewhat out of chronological order, because I know that they all collectively would fucking hate these books (I personally didn't, glimmers of brilliance make me all the more frustrated) - and she said this amazing thing which was like, well, you say there's all this umming and ahhing over whether the universe might not be able to reboot if there's mass left behind - and it seems alright just to leave something - what if this is Cheng Xin's final fuck-up, finally chosen in an active way?

It's actually her seeming passivity which would allow this final stunt at all. Nobody would dare assume - not her last companions - that she would intentionally do this at all. So far she's damned humanity once, and then effectively twice (at least I think she is implicitly damned), and she is, really sincerely, a complete fuck-up wastrel who never does or thinks anything interesting. Luo Ji gets to be a fuck-up wastrel who thinks interesting things and does interesting things, and fails once, twice, three times, probably more, as a Wallfacer, and has a moment of stunning success because he's a fuck-up wastrel. This is a great idea, which unfortunately suffers in the face of the fact that Liu Cixin is obsessed with strong men.

The idea that Cheng Xin looks at the face of the overwhelming loneliness of her universe, the cruelty and inhumanity of the dark forest thesis, the wars upon wars which ravaged multiple dimensions until they were folded into flatness, and then decides to weaponise a sense of sentimentality to finally damn that universe - to prevent it from being reborn, to escape samsara - when she would never be expected to be capable of such a thing, to finally actively choose this maternality she's passively carried and passively condemned humanity with - is maybe the thing which could redeem that ending for me. It's bleak - and I still don't agree with the overall attitude the books hold - but it is actually a real thesis! It does actually deliver on this threat that's expounded upon and seems like, in any other story, would surely allow for some small space to remember humanity. But how much mass is enough? If enough pocket unvierses all leave behind a few hundred grams, surely it would start to add up.

The alternative interpretation is that Cheng Xin once again fucks everything up but not on purpose, merely through an innocent-intentioned sentimentality. But I think the fact that she acknowledges the threat allows a bit of wiggle room. The argument here would be that Luo Ji's final Wallfacer plan against the Trisolarans is concealed from us until its reveal; this move has been pulled once before. The key difference is that we never see whether the universe reboots. I think this is very meaningful for the argument that it doesn't, and that we wouldn't see the payoff of Cheng Xin's plan, because there is no universe anymore. This really makes it a true twist ending to me which - most meaningfully of all - doesn't go against what the books were trying to do, but actually strengthens it.

But she put the effort into recording humanity's history, and I might go so far as to argue that she did that to explain her motivation to end it all, instead of slipping into it, but actually thinking about it.

The real conflict here, actually with any ending, is the sense of anthropocentrism which it otherwise sought to subvert. But I think reading against that, if we take it seriously that human beings are moral creatures who make moral judgements irrespective of our place in the universe (however small that is), I think that actually pairs better thematically with the idea that a graveyard remembrance of humanity also serves as the final, very small thing - this small living thing - which says 'no more'. The sense of reincarnation and enlightenment here, too, feels fitting, though I'd argue that its overly cynical view of the universe does the argument better.

I wrote all this out and then I went back to reread the last few pages. (I'm using an ebook version, so I don't have page citations). I'm going to see if this interpretation actually holds:

Cheng Xin asks if she can leave five kilograms behind, and then:

As long as the tiny sun inside the sphere continued to give off light, this miniature ecological system would persist. As long as it remained here, Universe 647 would not be a lifeless, dark world. “Of course,” said Guan Yifan. “The great universe isn’t going to fail to collapse because it misses five kilograms.” He had another thought that he did not voice: Perhaps the great universe really would fail to collapse because it lacked a single atom’s mass. [...] Ultimately, the great universe was certain to lose at least a few hundred million tons of matter, or perhaps even a million billion billion tons. Hopefully, the great universe could ignore such a loss.

So the sequence of events is this:

they're going to heed the call of the Returners

Cheng Xin wants to leave behind something to remember humanity by

Guan Yifan says of course she can, so graciously giving her permission

they acknowledge the general fact that others may do the same thing, or maybe even a single atom might be enough to prevent the universe rebooting, so it's a gamble anyway

Holy fuck this is terrible. Anyway, if we go through this with the perspective of the books - that every civilisation is interested first and foremost in survival at any cost, and short of that, to be remembered (survival in memory) - it is near-inevitable that there will be other mass left behind. But the flipside of this is that each individual choice matters; maybe with enough choosing to forego that, the universe could reboot. It's not definite. The ending is left open, the 'science' here is left imprecise. But we are reading between the lines of motivation. I'm not sure that my reading holds as an intended reading - because I do think the thematic compromise of the ending really does feel quite clear - but this is how I would make it more concordant with the series.

I much prefer it for the fact that Cheng Xin uses her contemplation in this lonely, ugly pocket universe to come to a conclusion of leaving mass behind to damn the universe. It would give her something to do. It would improve it tonally - haha, just rereading it, my God, I can't believe this is the ending to these books - and I think I like it just because it subverts that patronising treatment Guan Yifan affords her, like a little child asking for a lolly, concealing the truth of the potential cruelty of nature... which she is actually very well aware of.

I don’t know how much those catastrophes and the final destruction of the Solar System had to do with me. Those are questions that could never be answered definitively. But I’m certain they had something to do with me, with my responsibilities. And now, I’ve climbed to the apex of responsibility: I am responsible for the fate of the universe.

I would like Cheng Xin to abuse the trust in her sweet passivity. This would parallel neatly with Luo Ji's defense against the Trisolarans, the deception within deception within deception, against the ultimate enemy, suffocating it in the cradle.

[sammysnaughtygirl]

Fire Country Season 3: Every New Cast Member & Who They Play

"Fire Country" is coming in scorching hot with its next season, and it's going to be adding two new faces when it finally returns. One of them will seemingly be connected to Bode Donovan's (Max Thieriot) entrance into the world of the Southern California firefighters, and another seems to be connected to the world of Three Rock.

The actors are Jared Padalecki and Leven Rambin. Padalecki, best known for his role on "Supernatural" and fresh off The CW's reboot of "Walker," will essay the role of Camden Casey, per Deadline. Camden is a cocky surfer type and a firefighter who takes an immediate shine to Bode. Fans can expect Padalecki to be a recurring player -- but Camden might become another prospect for a "Fire Country" spin-off if the character does well with audiences.  A Casey-centered spin-off would join "Sheriff Country," which follows Morena Baccarin's Mickey Fox, as the second "Fire Country" spin-off in development at CBS. 

Meanwhile, "True Detective" star Rambin will play Audrey, per TVLine. Like Bode, Audrey used to be a part of a prison fire camp, and she has the street-smart toughness to prove it. Yet, she also has a soft side; she's a musician and has a sunny kindness that might help get Bode out of his post-Gabriela (Stephanie Arcila) funk. Like Padalecki, Rambin will recur on the series as of this writing. While the "Fire Country" EPs haven't spoken about Rambin's addition to the show, they have said something about Padalecki.

Fire Country's EPs Are Thrilled To Have Padalecki Aboard

"Fire Country" showrunner Tia Napolitano told TVLine that they're quite jazzed to have Jared Padalecki aboard for Season 3. "We launch Camden Casey in a really dynamic way. We were so excited about casting Jared. And he's really going to 'flip the script' in Edgewater. Everyone sort of treats Bode as this tiger they're trying to tame, and Camden kind of says, 'Why are you trying to tame a tiger? Let him out!' Since Camden is set to unleash Bode's inner rebel, one's left to wonder what sort of impact this might have on the narrative. Will Bode get stuck in a situation that packs him off to Three Rock? Will he get in trouble covering for Casey? Will he develop an attraction for Audrey that puts everything on the line for him? Audiences will have to wait and see. "Fire Country" will return with fresh episodes on October 18.

[lilyginnyblackv2]

I found the answers and things Nomura spoke about in the new interview, in regards to KH, to be really reassuring and a good sign.

Honestly, I'm glad that KH4 is going to be the start of the conclusion for the series. I feel like the series really lost itself for a while there, and Nomura himself seems to have realized this as well, basically stating in this interview that KH4 is going to be a reset in a way. (Basically a soft reboot).

I have a bit of doubt in regards to this, due to the fact that we know some things are going to be connected from previous games to KH4, but bringing in fresh new writers that aren't as familiar with the series and Nomura stating that the mobile games aren't going to be a necessary component is nice to hear.

(I abhor mobile gatcha games, they are so predatory, so I refuse to engage in the mobile game stuff outside of what is necessary).

Outside of that, I did find it to be quite funny that Nomura was like, "I like watching Youtube videos with KH theories, but most of the time I'm just thinking it's not that deep." lol I honestly feel that way about most Soriku fan theories, but also, I hope this means that Nomura has watched the Riku's Gay and Why It Matters video.

I sincerely hope he watched that and came to the conclusion that Riku is, in fact, gay. (lmao, but also seriously for real!).

I'll link to the page of the Kingdom Hearts Insider forums that has the English translation of the KH section of the interview down below in the comments. Feel free to share your own thoughts! 😊

[thereal-true-ogilvie]

hello everyone welcome to i talk about benrey for a minute here

as someone who’s watched the entirety of hlvrai at least 6 times, the full vods at least 3, and the cast commentary hovering somewhere around 10, i consider myself to be pretty well-versed in the series. i also kin benrey. this is probably important to my perception of him.

the series is about self-aware AI.   its in the title! so it seems obvious enough to me that Benrey was programmed to be the final boss. he was SUPPOSED to be a silly character that antagonizes the protag and throws off the group dynamic, and then it’s a big reveal and you get to beat up this guy that was mean to you!

but he doesnt wanna. hes self aware.

Of all the characters, i think Bubby and Tommy are the most “powerful” in that they were able to break their characters the most. Tommy is a bit of a wild card because he doesn’t usually act like an AI. I view him as the “character you’re supposed to protect” in the party, but somewhere along the way he, too, became self-aware and figured out how to handle his own. I think that’s where the age thing comes in. He was programmed to be a 5-year-old that you’re trying to get out of this dangerous facility! but he didn’t want to be a 5-year-old, he’s smarter than that, he’s capable! so he changed it. Him being the son of Gman also probably helped with him being able to just do that.

I take Bubby and Dr. Coomer as both being tutorial characters. Dr. Coomer is a bit broken, but he still does his best to teach you about things. I think he’s the tutorial NPC that goes “watch out for [x]” and “we can use ropes to cross big pits!” and “we should call them Peeper Puppies!” while Bubby was supposed to be the “here’s how you shoot a gun”

Like, Dr. Coomer does the knowledge about the world, and Bubby does the action. for the video game. And Bubby is supposed to be kinda cold to you, because the action-tutorial NPCs tend to be. Like “what you cant even hold your own? tch, guess ill have to teach you.” But Bubby doesn’t do that. He doesn’t WANT to play the game, he wants to go back home. He liked it before the game was switched on. So he doesn’t teach Gordon shit and just tries to speedrun so the player will leave and he can go back home.

one little scene that stood out to me so much was when the crew is sitting around in a circle with the pigeons. not outside, the other scene with them sitting in a circle and there’s pigeons. why are there 2 of those.

anyways, Benrey is just staring at this pigeon behind Gordon, and singing to it, calmly. And then there’s a loud beep that sounds like the vox, and definitely doesnt come from Benrey. and he suddenly gets up and shoots the pigeon. That reads SO HARD like he was being too soft with the game world, so it pushed him to do something evil randomly. Like a little villain reboot.

Almost everything he does to antagonize Gordon can be read as genuine confusion. He kills random NPCs because he knows theyre not important, and that they can’t feel anything, and that they’ll only slow the team’s progress. And what makes Gordon so mad at him is how often Benrey says Gordon shouldnt be allowed in here. I take that as a similar stance to Bubby. Benrey doesn’t want to be the villain. He doesn’t want the player to progress and make him. That gets more obvious the closer we get to the end, and most people tend to notice it in the last scenes before Xen, where he’s suggesting they go all the way back, and basically begging the player to stop here, at least for a little while.

its really sad, honestly. but i take the cast commentary bits as canon. Which makes it adorable when Benrey comes back into the movie theatre with Gordon and we get

“I wonder what will happen. I bet you know what happens!”

“I win!!!”

He did win. He got to get past being the final boss. He got to join the epilogue. I think, he probably wasn’t supposed to be able to. But these guys broke the game enough that he could. Isn’t that sweet? Isn’t that a nice ending for him? I think he deserves it.

Wayne says he acts like “he isn’t aware unless he’s being spoken to” and I think that fits really well. Like, sometimes his actions are coded into his behavior, so he does them without realizing. And then the player interacting with him (which is the premise of the self-awareness) forces him to actually look at what he did, and sometimes he has no idea how to explain it. Leading to his “huh?”

listen to me. are you listening. i need you to hear this. i need more people to understand benrey. and how much i love him. hes trapped in the narrative, doomed by it to be the villain. but he doesn’t want to be. he clearly cares about the crew in his own silly goofy way. he doesn’t want to fight them. i wrote down everything he said in the finale, and he only says 5 outright malicious lines, all of which are directly after an unnatural pause, like he’s being rebooted again. Some important lines: “I knew this was gonna happen,”

“Stop shooting at me, I have to shoot back, I don’t wanna do that,”

“I didn’t have a big plan, I was supposed to be nice, but you forced me to be BAD so I’m gonna be BAD… friend.” the small, quiet “friend” there gets me every time. even after everything, even after his nature is revealed, he wants to believe theyre still friends.

“Don’t go in there, please… I don’t like that room." The amount of times he sounds so genuinely sad when asking them to stop, or even just saying “bro..” like he’s mourning the friendship they could’ve had. The amount of times he sounds genuinely pained when he’s glitching out and stretching across the screen.

And his last words, said childishly of course, but,

“This isn’t fair.”

[phoebehalliwell]

have you ever wondered which actresses could portray the charmed ones if the story was set nowadays? (it may seem weird but i like to make fancasts about the books/shows i like and i was curious if you also thought about it...) i love your blog btw!

hiiiii i actually have never thought of this but i did some thinking over a lunch break or two and i came up with five different options ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Option One

The Tried And True Brunettes!!

basically a one-to-one of the original except set in 2024 so adding a couple more modern slants i imagine prue would maybe work in tech or an app or a start up instead of the auction house, phoebe would def have some plotline with dating apps something or other tying into her column, chappell roan is def performing at p3

Claudia Jessie as Prue Halliwell // i’ve only seen her on bridgerton but the sharpness and the softness she displays with eloise i think would really help encapsulate prue

Victoria Pedritti as Piper Halliwell // ive seen her in a couple things but specifically the characters in the haunting of hill house and the haunting of bly manor i think could really lend itself to her earlier seasons versus her agro kind of insane variant as love in you could def show itself in the later seasons

Danielle Rose Russell as Phoebe Halliwell // if anyone’s seen legacies whenever drr is playing lizzie… i know she’s got the sauce

Mikey Madison as Paige Matthews // i only know her from the scream reboot but i totally see the vision

Option Two

It’s San Francisco!!

for a show that so frequently reminds us it is set in san francisco and the surrounding bay area, it features so few asian characters it is honestly confusing, given that the city itself is roughly one third asian. the show initially seemed like in wanted to lean into that in the very first season given episodes like dead man dating, but it really petered out. this recasting offers a new perspective of the city as well as different facets of life for the charmed ones to explore (i would love to see a lunar new year episode / zodiac episode to overwrite the existing one in canon which is just so :///). for this specific casting, i would have them be a vietnamese family, with paige being half asian and half white raised by adopted white parents, so when she comes into the fold, it's not just her learning about her magical heritage but also her getting to learn and connect with her asian heritage as well

Kelly Marie Tran as Prue Halliwell // i've only seen her in star wars admittedly i don't even know which one i'm not a star wars girlie But i think she carries with her both the bravery of prue and that kind of strong dignity/forceful aura that would really help shape the role

Lana Condor as Piper Halliwell // i know her as lara jean from to all the boys i've loved before and honestly from that alone i think she'd kill as piper

Leah Lewis as Phoebe Halliwell // okay. so while i haven't actually watched nancy drew, my mutuals love it, and from the gifsets i've seen + the promos they would show before riverdale, i do think we've found our phoebe

Piper Curda as Paige Matthews // not the first and not the last pick from Legacies, piper was introduced in the 4th season i'm p sure and i really like her laid back / obviously gay aura and i think she would make a really interesting obviously gay paige

Option Three

Asian Doesn’t Inherently Mean East Asian!!

i wanna see desi witches i feel like i never see desi witches!! plus the bay area / northern california as a whole has a very vibrant indian community so i would love to see that tapped into

Simone Ashley as Prue Halliwell // while she is in sex education we all know the example i'm going to give you here is kate sharma from bridgerton who is basically just regency prue halliwell

Amita Suman as Piper Halliwell // i know her as inej from shadow and bone which admittedly as a series, i did not like. however, i think amita is a talented actress and could pull off an excellent piper

Avantika Vandanapu as Phoebe Halliwell // best known for playing karen in the new mean girls movie. definitely would kill it as phoebe

Maitreyi Ramakrishnan as Paige Matthews // best known as devi in never have i ever, a show that i actually did not watch but my mom did so i've seen roughly 1/3 of all episodes. i think she's a very skilled actress and could play the willful, stubborn, and creative paige excellently

option four

Black Girl Magic!!

i'm going to be perfectly honest with you -- this was absolutely motivated by having an ayo piper. think on it. like. gas.

Omono Okojie as Prue Halliwell // yet another legacies pick but what can i say i love the cast. i think she would bring an appropriate gravitas and like cool stubborness to prue

Ayo Edibiri as Piper Halliwell // hold up sydney adamu from the bear. hold up piper halliwell. they're the same picture.

Jadah Marie as Phoebe Halliwell // i know her from descendants 3 where she was playing dr facilier's daughter celia and that was really all the evidence i needed. she's totally phoebe

Madison Reyes as Paige Matthews // she's julie from julie and the phantoms which if you haven't seen you should esp if you love dcoms bc it's another kenny ortega classic. i think madison brings the right spirit to paige. additionally, being the half sister, she is actually not just black but afro latina, and could introduce new perspectives from her specific puerto rican descent esp in regards to brujeria (a la josefina in season 2 or maybe 3 of the charmed reboot)

Option Five

Everyone Knows The Charmed Ones Are Blonde!!

We're standing in the home of the Charmed Ones, we've got their powers, we got their book, and we got blonde multi-tonal hair!!! on a very real level, could not resist making the blonde variants. largely motivated by sabrina carpenter as phoebe

Meghann Fahy as Prue Halliwell // known for the bold type and the white lotus i think meghann could really the convey the whole i'm lonely but i'm good/i'm bitter but i swear i'm fine vibe prue has going for her

Elle Fanning as Piper Halliwell // we see piper's soft side when elle plays aurora in maleficent and her agro side when she plays catherine in the great

Sabrina Carpenter as Phoebe Halliwell // do i really need to explain this? i'm right. you know i'm right.

Renee Rapp as Paige Matthews // come back to television the kids miss you. i know she usually plays the more prue coded characters like with leighton in the sex lives of college girls and arguably even regina george in mean girls but i've seen her in those interviews. "There is this man who owns a bus touring company. His name is buddy, and he is such an asshole, and he was so disrespectful to my friends, Priscilla and Bella, who I work with, and to my mother. If you're watching this, I can't stand you, and I hope your business burns. You are so disrespectful and so misogynistic. I. Hate. You." that's my paige matthews

castings for other characters under the cut ❤️

Leo Wyatt

Dev Patel // like. logically. could we book dev patel? no. but does that make me want him any less? also no.

Kedar Williams Stirling // best known as jackson in sex education where he just exudes such good vibes you know what i'm saying? that just like nice aura. that's what i want for leo. when leo's around i want the feeling like things are going to be okay bc he's just so good

Alex Roe // if any of you watched siren on freeform i highly recommend the first two seasons i did give up on the third season but the first two were really good. he plays the male lead ben who i feel like honestly would translate over really well to leo. knowledgeable and constantly dealing with the women he loves as shit keeps getting weirder

Vanessa Morgan // she does that "gazes lovingly at a person you are basically cosmically tied to" so well in riverdale i know she could kill as leah wyatt

Cole Turner

Manny Jacinto // i'm not watching the acolyte but i am watching those fancams and i'm gonna need more sexy villian manny jacinto asap

Nathan Parsons // one of those cw actors that gets passed around like the blunt so it only makes sense to have him here. i know him best as max from roswell new mexico but it's specifically when he plays jones, for all intents and purposes max's evil twin that he really starts cole cooking imo. i think he would offer a really fun take on cole.

Havana Rose Liu // who wouldn't go against both heaven and hell to be with her? i mainly know her from bottoms where she might not feel super cole coded but i see the vision

Chris O'Shea // i only know him as percival pickens in season six of riverdale but he served down and i know he'd make a great cole. watch s6 of riverdale. you don't have to watch any of the earlier seasons or any of the seasons after it to understand what's going on i promise. it's the season where they all get magic powers.

Darryl Morris

Quentin Plair // another pick from roswell new mexico he plays dallas the sexy preacher among other things and i think he has a really good um. it's like. that running out of patience type vibe you know what i'm saying? i really like the way he can get the terse like i am being nice right now but i need you to know that is a choice i am making type vibe that i really like when darryl gets (like when darryl first meets cole and there's that tension its such a good darryl moment)

John David Washington // could we book him? idk i don't know if he's really been in any tv shows i know his mainly blackKklansman and tenet and i feel like he def has the chops to give us an excellent darryl

Charles Michael Davis // another cw actor best known to me personally as marcel on the originals and as we can see in the photo looks great in a suit i think he would make a really good darryl esp in the softer moments connecting with the sisters/leo

William Jackson Harper // okay thru googling him right now he's 44?? that's insane to me he does not look 44. most know him as chidi from the good place which i think offers the perfect "this might as well be happening" type energy darryl so often has

[trashiesttrashboy]

Okay so I know that BotW and totk are probably meant to be a soft reboot to the series to make it easier for the writers to just do whatever they think is cool, but I just need to talk about this.

Before playing tears of the kingdom I firmly believed that BotW and totk took place in the child timeline, but now that I've started playing totk I think they take place in the adult timeline. Bare in mind I'm only about half way through totk so far so I might be wrong about a lot of things here.

Ganon already exists, meaning that Ocarina of Time must have taken place even before the story we see at the start of the game engraved into the wall, so all of this has to take place after the timeline split. Despite this, everyone seems to credit Raru as the first king of hyrule. We know this can't actually be the case since this takes place after ocarina of time, when there was definitely a king of hyrule on the throne (even if we didn't actually see him in the game), so why is Raru credited as the first king of hyrule?

Because he is. Or at least, the first king of THIS version of hyrule. In the adult timeline the world was flooded by the golden godesses, which eventually led to the people of hyrule settling somewhere else, a kingdom that they called New Hyrule. But the hyrule that we see in BotW and TotK is not New Hyrule. If you look closely at the Spirit tracks map and the totk/botw map, you can see exactly where they seem to line up!

Notice the shape of the shoreline in ST compared to the shape of the cliffs that surround Hyrule in BotW. Yes there are some differences but for the most part they are strikingly similar, right down to the sort of square shape to the south and that pokey-out but to the north. In fact, this is definitely more consistent than most other parts of hyrule's geography.

Not only that, but the cliffs are some of the highest landmasses that we see in BotW, if not THE highest. So high, in fact, that it's definitely not too far-fetched to say that they were largely untouched by the great flood. So why did everyone settle back in Old Hyrule? Because the sea level lowered too much, meaning that people would have had a much harder time accessing water. With Hyrule no longer completely flooded, and New Hyrule most likely running out of water, the people of New Hyrule moved back to Old Hyrule. Around this time, the Zonai descended from above and Raru became the first king of this new kingdom, hence why he is credited as the first king of Hyrule. Considering how long it's been, it's completely understandable that people would have forgotten that there were other Kingdoms of Hyrule before the current one (such as New Hyrule, and the original Hyrule).

[raisay]

Had a rough day yesterday anyway, and the dragon age news isn’t helping, and I’m feeling sick and can’t get back to sleep, so I’m still chewing on it. Rambling after the cut.

I guess what upsets me is that, it’s fine to do a soft reboot, but if they’re doing that, why on earth would you do it with Inquisition 2? Why bring back Morrigan if she can’t remember her own past with you? And I know that some people have mentioned that Kieran’s plot relevance is done, but… I didn’t like him just for his plot relevance. I liked him because Morrigan loved him so much, and he changed her for the better in such great ways. But this Morrigan is just going to be a husk with the face of a friend.

All the things the devs have been saying to justify the decision are just that: justifications. The same way sleezy devs justify dressing female characters in skimpy clothes. These aren’t people with motivations of their own, you’ve written them this way. If none of your choices matter 10 years or 100 miles apart, don’t set your sequel game there. But even then I’m entertaining a silly justification— the choice of Divine is going to matter, even in the north, because most of the people up there are Andrastian according to lore, but if they’re ignoring that lore, that brings up some other, bigger narrative concerns.

I wasn’t even asking for huge pay off from stuff like The Well of Sorrows, but what removing the weight of that choice does, now looking back, is make Solas’s anger over it seem pointless and silly. He was SO MAD, and for what?

There’s also just the logical question of how it’s going to appear in game. Is the narrative going to just weirdly tiptoe around all of the potential landmines? Am I going to constantly go “Huh, it feels weird that this wasn’t mentioned”? Because a game that awkwardly tiptoes around a previously important character’s quantum state is a game that, essentially, unwrites them from existence. If they don’t know my HoF’s race or gender or class, or if they’re even alive or dead, they essentially can’t mention them at all outside of “The Hero of Ferelden was a hero from Ferelden who stopped the Fifth Blight.” Like, damn, we know more about the person that ended the Fourth Blight than this, and it was even longer ago!

And then… what’s with the dev team’s apparent disdain for codex entries? Long time fans of the series LOVE codex entries! I know it’s unrealistic to expect everything to matter in game, but are you telling me I just kind of have to headcanon all the things Queen Anora did, and possibly who replaced her? I just have to headcanon whether or not my HOF cured the blight? Because if I have to write all this for myself, why am I paying BioWare $60? It’s certainly not for the gameplay, I never played these games for that, anyway. From the game’s perspective, Celene, Gaspard, and/or Briala did all this fighting with each other to sit on the throne and do… absolutely nothing of consequence. Are they going to just refer to them as “The Ruler of Orlais” (because they can’t even use Emperor or Empress). That’s going to be really stilted, if that’s what they do. In fact, that would *still* be awkward, because there can be multiple rulers. “The Ruler(s) of Orlais”.

And just more practically, in the case of the character that does seem most important to BioWare: Solas. They’ve stripped all the potential nuance from your Inquisitior’s relationship with him. You can’t be an Inquisitor who was a dear friend vowing to stop him at all costs OR you can’t be an ultra aggressive Inquisistor who is angry and always hated him, because these were rolled into one “stop Solas” option. One of the devs (sorry can’t remember who) also said that the Inquisitor feels some level of guilt for what Solas is doing. Why? Why would an Inquisitor who always hated him, and possibly punched him, feel any guilt at all? They didn’t do this, they’re a victim of his lies as much as anyone else. Solas is solely responsible for his own decisions, don’t put motivations in the Inquisitor’s head. If that level of character motivation from the Inquisitor is needed for this story, we should have played as them again instead.

So, I guess to sum up, I would have been fine with a soft reboot if they had been open about what this was from the start, and didn’t try to bait me back in with nostalgic characters that I love, that won’t remember me. It takes me out of the game and makes me see how Morrigan is PR and Varric is PR. And it’s going to be noticeable, and it’s going to be hollow.

But most of all it’s going to be sad, seeing these characters that I love not know their own past, like walking past an old friend knowing they’ve forgotten all the fun you used to have together.

[mejomonster]

So Sherlock Holmes Chapter One (from my naive just-started-playing perspective) seems to be a soft reboot of Frogwares Sherlock games, in the sense its a sort of origin story of Sherlock before he meets John Watson amd is the generally well known investigator with the personality and talents we (overall) expect. Since its a sort of origin story, it opens on a Sherlock (Sherry) with some personality traits in different values to the standard Later Sherlock, and with some skills just not as good yet (his deductions Feel far more fallible as they can be wrong in this game, or impossible to determine for sure if correct, amd from a gameplay perspective a young still growing Sherlock makes this feel more realistic, vice versa from a story perspective the gameplay lets them show Sherlock's young character and growth in the game). As a sort of original origin story, Frogwares has this creative freedom to change Sherlock (and add to/remove/edit) the Series as much as Sherlock adaptations do when they veer into some brand new aspects (like say Elementary, House, Psych). This is still the Sherlock Holmes we mostly know (or rather will BECOME the Sherlock Holmes from the original books mostly), but the changes made to him in Chapter One carry over into The Awakened. The 2nd game using this adapted version of Sherlock Holmes with the character changes and background history context that this original story in Chapter One added to the character. So it makes The Awakened feel more like an adaptation (like say Elementary or House etc) rather than an attempt to be mostly matching Book Sherlock.

Mostly, i like it. I like seeing original ideas and how theyre played with. Its like seeing an AU of sherlock, or a canon compliant add on (like in fanfiction). Its like the stories of Sherlock written after ACDs stories, based on them, but making new Sherlocks to some extent. Or interpreting in new ways by adding new ideas, or changing one or two, or changing setting and seeing how that effects the characters/story (like time period changed in Elementary etc).

I havent played the older Frogwares games (Crimes and Punishments is next on my list to play, maybe The Devils Daughter?), but i assume for the most part theyre going to be what i expect of BOOK Sherlock if put into new cases/situations.

Whereas Chapter One, is one (of a million) possible ideas of who book Sherlock might have been Before. Possibly taken to a bit of an AU route, just because i think in Chapter One they lean into a few character traits and growth arcs (and quirks) that make this Sherlock feel a bit distinctly different from the Original Sherlock cultural expectations from audiences. Chapter One Sherlock wants no friends, no anyone close to him, is bad with people. Thats a trait he gets better at by The Awakened, but its also one that some Adaptations give to Sherlock more than perhaps original Sherlock may actually have. Chapter One Sherlock, most notably, is given an origin story where his mom suffered from intense grief of his father's death, her own mental health deteriorated and she got ill, he felt unable to help (and was sheltered/lied to about the whole situation), was attacked by his mom (which his childhood self somewhat blamed himself for), and she died (and he blocked out the memory it was so painful). The origin story in the game is why he ultimately withdrew from people: he feared hurting them (fearing he hurt his mother), he feared them hurting him (his mom dying, mycroft lying, dad dying), he feared loving and losing them (for understandable reasons). Its not just a trait in general, that he doesnt like socializing with people or simply isnt good at it, in the game its a trait in part Because he's afraid of connecting to people and at least partly is pushing them away on purpose. The origin story in the game also has Sherlock react so strong to his dads death, his general childhood, that he has an imaginary friend Jon he relies on to self sooth. Because its a game, its a wonderfully utilized aspect that lets the player have a companion and Sherlock bounce off ideas aloud (when to a degree its just him working things out to himself). Its a tangible visible manifestation of what Sherlock emotionally goes through inside: his disassociation from reality and his own feelings, his desires FOR companionship and relating to people, his love of mystery and adventure and its escapist purpose for him, his care for people embodied by Jons compassion for others, his morality clearly more than sherlock lets on as he insists he doesnt value connection but does value Jon and Jon values connection so on some level Sherlock does and knows its valuable, its his hopes and fears, his self soothing to heal himself And his coping mechanisms of avoiding his own feelings and reality. Jon is a wonderful way to externalize all that so the audience can understand Sherlock internally, and so Sherlock can understand himself. (It also makes for an interesting original and emotional young Sherlock story).

But it has consequences. Jon is handled very significantly, which means going forward, when THIS chapter one Sherlock is used in future games its no longer just the Expected Overall General Sherlock. Its now a very specifically adapted Sherlock, with the character changes and history from chapter one informing how this new version of Sherlock is unique.

In The Awakened, this is a Sherlock we the player know had his own imaginary friend. We know he'd dissociated before. We know his mom had memory loss and believed her dead husband was alive, and how real it seemed to her while it was also very Painful to her family, we know Sherlock's seen doctors fail to heal mental health and potentially do harm without it being stopped in time. And its very interesting to see a Chapter One adaptation Sherlock in The Awakened scenarios. This version of Sherlock isnt going to question being transported to another dimension: partly because as any Sherlock does, he will assume a logical explanation like having breathed in drugs and hallucinated. But also, this Sherlock has seen things that no one else can like his imaginary friend Jon, his false memories then remembered memories, knows he's lied to himself with his own memories or completely blocked things out before. So it makes sense he wouldnt think a new dimension is weird to see: it could be his own mind making it up, or blocking out whats really there, he'd just accept the current thing he's seeing and act practical. When they go to the mental hospital, he sees the girl talk to her doll and to him its not much different than how he talked to Jon, when the doll talks it doesnt really matter if the girl is pretending to talk for the doll OR if the doll genuinely talks and is sentient. Its the girls business, Sherlock just intends to solve the mystery. He's not better than the girl, he's not judging the girl or her situation, he's quite neutral. He's been to some extent where she is, and still calls out to Jon when afraid, and can understand some of her own perspective. When he meets Becker, and realizes who it is, there's a parallel there between a mom who in Chapter One has the backstory of memory loss (and how Sherlock saw it growing up) and seeing Becker who's had that fate intentionally done to him by the head doctor. So from this version of Sherlock, theres an added weight to how cruel that is viewed by him. This Sherlock sees intentionally making someone forget as an extremely cruel thing to do. He views his own forgetting and then remembering the truth in chapter one, as ultimately a good thing despite being incredibly painful. So we know going into The Awakened that hes going to hate people who cause others to forget, who hurt other's minds or medically abuse others, he's going to have some compassion and understanding for the victims, and he's going to value people remembering the truth and the truth being Revealed to more people as positives. He's going to not question possibly supernatural things, as he's seen things others dont before and might even assume seeing such things is normal For him (so he doesnt question why he might see something Watson doesnt for example). The whole Chapter One shaping of Sherlock Holmes adds this interesting angle on a new Story. It could be any story now, and if Sherlock saw things others didnt we may not know for sure if they were there or just there for Sherlock. It could be any story now, and Sherlock may not question some things and instead consider them normal, and might have a particular hatred for lies and medical abuse to an extent even greater than perhaps expected of other Sherlock adaptations. And in this particular The Awakened story, it has things to play with that make Sherlock interact with the mystery in some ways that i dont think another adaptation might have. (Again, about the girl and her doll, i think a version of Sherlock who'e never had Jon might view and judge her thinking differently, i think a version of Sherlock who'd never forgotten his own memories or had Jon might question going to another dimension or hearing voices a Bit More).

Im only about 50% through the Awakened so feel free to ignore as i may get some things totally wrong. I just find it interesting how some Chapter One writing decisions make this Holmes a new version.

[fantomette22]

Little theory about Zelda Echoes of Wisdom timeline

Alright i figure I should do a quick lil post about it before the game release. Because i have some thoughts about where it could fit in the timeline? Actually i have a couple of possibilities i wanna share. With people questioning themselves with what we learn on the promotional materials, trailers, & japanese website + 1 image of the beginning of the game there's lot of speculations going in all direction.

Minor possible spoilers ahead (but besides map & screenshot from the website & trailer nothing much)

First nintendo somehow change the downfall timeline a bit and I just notice now WHAT IN HYLIA?!

Hyrule historia timeline (2011)

Tears of the kingdom masterworks (2024)

Did they just casually swap Link’s awakening with the Oracle series?? Why? How? I- I don't understand. Is it because of LA remake? A link with theh possible development of Echoes of Wisdom?🤔 (ahah get it?) (We’ll probably have to wait years to know were exactly it fit too now… i mean finger cross that Nintendo will reveal it in a few months…)

So now where does EOW would fit hm? I saw many speculations on it:

Same world/Link as ALTTP, LA, and the oracle series (soft reboot remake)

2. In between ALTTP and ALBW : but different Hyrule, different Link & Zelda

3. After ALBW, different Zelda & Link

4. Before ALTTP? Different Hyrule and Zelda but a Link we already know? (more of a crack theory of mine but hear me out later ok?!)

So one of the most logical take would be it's in the same world as ALLTP, LA etc. With the same Link Zelda etc

Could be after LA or Oracle or in between but in all cases after ALTTP. And that would be another adventure for this dear Link and Zelda! But there's a few things that people point out that didn't work : Like it's not exactly the same hyrule/map even if it's similar, there's Gerudo, Mojo, Gorons, Zoras etc, references to the goddess Hylia, to sheikah etc

Well yes it's a good point! But it could just be because it's kind of a soft reboot remake? In 1991 lot of things in more recent Zelda games just didn't exist. And I wouldn't mind a remake of ALTTP rebooted with lot of extra things. So ALTTP happened before that but not the way we know it probably.

Plus

It seems the map could still kinda fit apparently.

As for 2 & 3 options well that could be possible but there's a few things bothering me 🤔

Link seems like he's at full lvl, like he already save Hyrule and came back from an adventure. So which one? Would be weird if we never saw it before. I can’t refund the image but it’s in one of the last trailer : there’s a man on a building calling for help because he’s attack by a moblin. He ask if we’re Link to help him out. Another clue Link helped people around before.

(Plus ALTTP & ALBW Hyrule are to similars from something like this to be a different incarnation and in the middle. Same with after ALBW and between Zelda 1&2. Gerudo, Gorons etc fit more before than after ALBW when they all disappear afterwards.

Some people point out it couldn't be ALTTP Link because his hat have a green strip instead of yellow?

Well Link in Link's awakening remake have a green strip.

And actually he has 2 hats anyway now 😅 problem solve

Yes that's Link house in EOW it seems and there's a lil hat! With a yellow strip.

« But it’s not Link’s house from ALTTP » you’re right it’s in Southorn village. But in Alttp i think it was his uncle house right? Maybe he returned in his og village afterwards. Or it’s because of the reboot. Or you’re right it’s not the same…

Some other people point this out ^ too. That if Zelda don’t know Link they can’t be the same as in ALTTP right? (Well they did that in Oracle too apparently?) in TOTK many characters who are supposed to know Link have no idea but it’s the devs choice for new player so- could be for new players too. So no accurate in lore? and i mean Zelda here is trying to stay anonymous. (See the wanted posters all around hyrule for her). If she says she know Link and it’s her bestie she might get into trouble 😂 so who knows..

4. Ok here’s my crazy theory but i hope it’s not that. But if it happened hello?!

What if! What if- Link went to the past for real?! MINDBLOWN

Ok more seriously if it's indeed a different Hyrule, different Princess Zelda than in ALTTP/LA universe (even if well everything point at at LA sequel), maybe it could still be the same Link! The same than in LA remake. Who was send back in time (or the future)? (that would be why there's Gerudo, Mojo, Gorons etc). That would explain why Link is so OP, why he's helping everyone around and why he went directly to fight Ganon to save Zelda. But man the implications... that would be insane? And- how?! If it's really that I will blame the Wind fish. So wait in that case would that meant he could be the ancestor of alttp zelda if how is a few century before?! *faints* still think alba zelda being his descendant his more logical too... anyway-

Bonus

My 2 grain of salt theory on Tri is that if Link does have the triforce at the beginning of the game. Well his wish to protect hyrule/zelda could have summon Tri. But who knows.

In all cases the game is releasing soon! Cannot wait! And we might get seattle on all of this soon! Or not 💀 if the zelda team stays vague at usual… (Sahasrahla save us please! No seriously he would be a great indicator). I still think it might be a ALTTP/LA sequel (while being soft reboot but... well people did touch very interesting points... we'll see)

[descendantofthesparrow]

y'know i wanted to ask: what's your honest opinion about descendants 4: rise of red? do you think its linear to the story at all?(you probably heard this before) or do you think its a divestment to what the point of descendants 1-3 were trying to put across?

well, the story/point of 1-3 was kinda 'you can choose who you want to me/you can choose your own destiny/you are not your parents/nothings written in stone' and-with how fucking wild the plot for ROR looks so far-it seems like they're KINDA trying to follow the base story of descendants but they're also just blatantly trying to soft reboot the series so they can go off and make more movies that are fully separate from the og movies/characters, (esp with how its clear they didn't even watch the OG movies because for some reason they think Mal turned into a dragon in d1(SHE DIDNTTTT))

so its like they're trying to be like 'D4~!' but also trying to quietly push all the original content to the side for their new stuff and D3 IS ONLY 5 YEARS OLLLLD

anyway so like-both i guess, they're playing it off like its the next movie of the series but also-its so wildly disconnected from the 3 movies that it feels like a new movie instead with references to the OG series(like how Auradon prep is a brand new building cuz they didn't get the old one and how they blatantly ignore the og canon(which is admittedly flimsy) and now suddenly everyone went to school together before Auradon was created instead of being from their actual time periods (MALEFCENT DOESNT KNOW HOW A FRIDGE WORKSSSSSS SHES NOT A 2024 ALT KIDDDD) and were resurrected by FG at king beasts orders to be imprisoned on the isle without their magic forever to suffer a fate worse than death(yes thats canon).

again-anyway-to sum it up- its both. they're "attempting" to follow the storyline(which was lowkey nonexistent) but also make ROR its complete own thing to be able to ignore everything 1-3 set up for the universe(it has terrible universe building but we all love it anyway)