#secret hitler actually is pretty fun

[mousy-nona]

Headcanon that Lucifer and Alastor have two different date nights each week, one is for them to have alone time, while the other is a family date night.

“Uno!” 

“No, Dad, you still have two cards!” 

“Oh.” Lucifer dropped a +4 onto the pile. “Now uno!” 

“Hey, Big Daddy, it ain’t your turn anymore. It’s Tall, Dark, and Creepy’s turn to go.” Angel Dust peered at Alastor who, despite his trademark smile, looked like he was in physical pain. His left eye was twitching rather alarmingly. “You hangin’ in there?” 

“Yes, fine,” Alastor snapped. “I’m simply at a loss at how such a simple game can defeat Lucifer’s intellect. You would think he would have learned something after a few million years.” 

“Hey!” Lucifer threw the cards in his hand at Alastor – which, being a grand total of one, wasn’t very impressive. The sad little +4 gently tapped him on the nose before fluttering to the ground.

Alastor sighed, very loudly. “Great. Why do we bother with this again?”

“Because it’s game night!”

Lucifer was referring, of course, to the weekly tradition that had started because Lucifer had insisted if you date me, you date my daughter too, and Alastor had shuddered and agreed just so he wouldn’t have to hear him say that atrocious sentence, ever again. Then Charlie had insisted on bringing Vaggie along, because she was her partner, and therefore family.

Then Angel Dust had overheard there was a weekly game night going on, and dragged Husk into coming along. Niffty was the only one that Alastor had personally invited, although none of them knew that (it was their little secret). 

“Can we have just one game night where we actually finish a game?” Vaggie complained. “I actually have a good hand this time!” 

“I don’t know why y’all put yourselves through this,” Husk called out from the bar. Ice cubes clinked as he poured himself another stiff one. “They’re going to start trying to kill each other in five minutes.” 

“We will not,” Lucifer sniffed as he collected his card and sat back down. “And we do not try and kill each other every time.” 

Angel Dust started ticking off incidents on his fingers. “Let’s see. We never got to finish that game of Monopoly, Clue, Yahtzee, Catan –” 

“Family Feud,” Vaggie added, staring hard at Alastor. He sniffed and looked away. 

“You cannot ask a gentleman from my time to guess what you barbarians from the 21st century think about things. That was a poor choice of game.” 

“Scrabble, Secret Hitler–”

“Alastor was cheating that time!” Lucifer burst out.

“I was not,” Alastor said smugly. The rest of them shuddered at the memory. Alastor had been surprisingly good at Secret Hitler – so good, in fact, that it and any other political manipulation games like it had been banned from the halls of Hazbin Hotel.

“Apples to Apples, Sorry!, Hive Pocket–”

“That one was Niffty!” Charlie broke in, desperately trying to keep the peace. “She stabbed the game board, remember?”

Niffty started vibrating and jabbing at things. “Bugs!”

Angel Dust sighed. “My point still stands, toots. These two are physically incapable of ending a single game without flirt-fighting in the middle of it.”

Alastor snarled. Lucifer turned red. And everyone else nodded. 

------------------

What none of the others knew was that Lucifer and Alastor had another weekly tradition. A secret they kept hidden from the others. 

Every Sunday, after Alastor had finished his script for the next day and Lucifer had put the finishing touches on his latest invention, Lucifer summoned a golden portal and whisked them off to the far reaches of Hell. 

It was a different wonder every time. A hill near the Greed Ring, the toxic plumes of smoke creating a beautiful emerald mist over the dilapidated city. The very top of the skyscraper that towered over the Lust Ring. A relaxing dip in one of the lava pools of the Wrath Ring, which made Alastor hum and stretch like a cat as the boiling liquid lapped at the scar on his chest.

One day, Lucifer took them to a bustling street packed with street vendors and shops selling the exact same merch. The smell of caramel and popcorn and cotton candy was heavy in the air. He looked uncharacteristically nervous, his face paler than usual, and his hands were constantly picking at his hat, his coat, his staff.

Alastor peered at him. “Whatever is the matter with you?” 

“I have something to show you.” 

Lucifer led them deeper into the colorful, fantastic clutches of Lu Lu World. Past gaggles of hellborn children and their exhausted parents, past lines for rides that looped at least ten times before disappearing into the buildings proper, past storybook houses and little animatronic villagers.

“Business must be doing well,” Alastor noted.

“Terrific. Our newest ride is a hit.” 

“Newest…?”

Lucifer stopped abruptly, staring at something above them. He was sweating slightly, his feet shifting this way and that. “I hope you don’t mind,” he said, in a tiny voice. “I got, well, inspired.”

Alastor looked up, and his eyes widened. Towering above them was…him. A flawless version of him. The demon grinning at the top of the ride was perfect in every way, his smile hiding a million secrets that both enthralled and frustrated the viewer. Enthralling. Alluring. The shadow coat he was wearing created a natural barrier between him and the audience, but his outstretched hand seemed to beckon you closer, to touch what was forbidden.

Can you defeat the enigma? Was the tagline stamped at the bottom of the board.

“It’s an escape game,” Lucifer said hurriedly. “I thought of it during one of our dates, and I couldn’t get it out of my mind. You don’t mind, do you? I was so nervous about it, but I thought I’d –”

“He’s a bit perfect, don’t you think?” Alastor said, his voice gruff.

Lucifer squinted at the display. “I don’t know what you mean,” he said, sounding honestly confused. “It looks just like you.” 

Alastor groaned, unsure how to handle the unfamiliar, powerful feelings batting at his too-small heart. This is how he sees me? 

“You don’t like it,” Lucifer babbled. “I’m sorry, I’ll take it down–”

“No, it’s fine.” Alastor said. “It’s…good.”

“Really?” Lucifer relaxed, all the tension leaving his tight shoulders. 

“Really.” 

They stood there a while, simply breathing in each other's company as the muse and the artist stared at the work they had created together.

Finally, Alastor spoke. "May I suggest a game for our next game night?"

"You? Have a suggestion?" Lucifer nodded warily. "Go ahead."

"Secret Hitler."

"No!"

[natashasbitxh]

I just watched the secret Hitler video and I didn't know Chanse and Shayne were a team as fascists. Another banger of a vid, just because they're so good to blend and just play the game properly. They know what they're doing. (Amazing by Arasha too).

But here's my thing, I watched the guess who from the Nintendo characters and that's another vid where you can see this two are to powerful to play games. They know, they really know.

Anyways what I'm trying to say is that I need a game where they have to be a team for real and destroy everyone else hahahah. I know you could say the new lovestruck has a similarity but they weren't working together, they were doing their own thing for a similar purpose (same as secret Hitler) so I found that really intriguing. I need them as a team for a escape room, I feel like they could really escape the room really fast. I'm kind of watching all this vids 'cause I don't remember watching them together that much, but my memory now is being like wow, there some powerful shit going on there.

Also in the love is blind game you can see they actually wanted to win, but they didn't sadly hahahaha. Another thing is that weirdly, Chanse wins a lot of games I didn't remember him winning, I would suggest to see Shayne reaction to those moments when Chance wins a game or the challenge pit hahaha, his face is so funny sometimes.

(I wish we see them more in games as a team or something, it's really my favorite thing, if you can recommend another game where they are kind of in the same team or against each other please share, 'cause I can't remember right now another one)

And also, weird that after that battle in the guess who Nintendo characters the other's guess who vids where they appear, they aren't playing against each other or in the same team, that actually annoyed me hahahaha

Sharee your thoughts!!! I'm always happy reading you talk about them and your insight.

omg such a good vid, those 3 r INSANE during that video. CHANSE TAKING THE BULLET?? ARASHA LYING ABT THE CARDS COURTNEY GAVE HER?? SHAYNE DISTRACTING WITH JOKES AND INDULGING IN DAMIEN'S THEORIES?? (and literally Shayne saying when he's a fascist he's quiet...before proceeding to be quiet most of the game😭)

oooo yeah they're fun in that vid too!

OOOO YES AN ESCAPE ROOM WOULD BE INSANE!! I'm just rlly curiously if they can INTENTIONALLY work together (and without having to hide it) 😭 because so far unintentionally? Pretty good

yeah,but if I remember correctly they were close to winning weren't they? But nobody was catching up with Amangela/ New York and Toilet Water Girl 😭

Yeah, Chanse is pretty good at games I've found! COME ON DOWN TO THE CATFISH CABIN

some videos that have teams like secret Hitler (not necessarily working together): "The Lies Get Deeper", "How Well Do You Know Christmas Movies" (that one is pretty recent so you might know it), "Think Faster Not Harder (Really Loud Librarians)" and a lot of the try not to win videos! Theres deffo more but that's all I'll say for now!

lolll yeah, but maybe we'll get a vid where they do sometime in the future!

ahhh, thank you! Always happy to read and reply!

[buttonsgoblin]

Because I’m an absolute freak, I’ve been thinking about the game design of secret hitler recently. Because it’s a really good game, but the creators also seem to have really wanted it to be a genuine exploration of how liberal democracies succumb to fascism, and it’s just… extremely bad at that. I find this interesting, for reasons we do not yet fully understand.

So if you’ve never played secret hitler before, it’s a pretty standard tabletop hidden role game. Most players are liberals, some are secretly fascists, one is secretly hitler. Each round, you choose whether or not to vote in a new pair of players to be president and chancellor. The president randomly draws three cards representing pieces of legislation, which will either be liberal or fascist, and picks two to hand to the chancellor, who then picks one to “pass.” If you pass enough liberal legislation the liberals win, if you pass enough fascist legislation the fascists win. Also after a certain point in the game if you elect hitler as chancellor the fascists win. Pretty fun game, pretty shit metaphor for fascism.

The core of the issue is that irl it is not actually difficult to find a fascist if you’re actively looking for one. Fascists are not subtle. They give themselves enough deniability to fool mainstream conservatives and clueless libs, but if you actually know what to look for they’re very blatant. The problem is, the way to catch a real life fascist before they take power is to look at their rhetoric. I don’t really know how to replicate that in a board game, and secret hitler doesn’t either. So you just figure it out by looking at the policies people are passing. Sure, whatever, that works well enough.

The problem there, though, is with how fascists are expected to create deniability. In the game, when a fascist policy gets passed, the people responsible for passing it will point the finger, either at each other (“you gave me two fascist policies” “I gave you a liberal policy, but you picked the fascist one”) or the deck (“I drew three fascist policies, nothing we could do”). But in real life, passing a law is too involved to be done on accident. If a politician passes legislation, that’s because they want it to be passed.

The way real life fascists deal with this is to downplay the authoritarian elements of the legislation, and/or try to manufacture some justification for that authoritarianism. Since every policy is clearly labeled as either liberal or fascist, and fascist legislation is directly tied to the liberals’s lose condition, downplaying it isn’t an option. To its credit, the game does sort of attempt to allow players to manufacture a justification: passing fascist legislation gives the president the ability to do things like check another player’s secret role or execute a particularly suspicious player. But so few fascist policies need to be passed before the fascists win that doing this is almost never worth it for the liberal team. So in practice, most players argue essentially that they passed the law on accident, which you have to imagine wouldn’t play well with the constituents.

There’s also the problem of incentives. The win conditions in secret hitler are, by design, fairly straightforward. Every liberal win condition directly or indirectly requires figuring out who the fascists are. I like that from a game design perspective, it keeps play focused on the social deduction stuff, but it’s not how politics works. Most politicians have a large number of goals at any given time, which generally boil down to getting reelected, pleasing their donors, and pushing whatever pet agendas they happen to be personally invested in. Some of them care about stopping fascism when they can work it into their schedules, but it’s never the only thing they’re doing. Secret Hitler understands that fascists need liberal complicity to succeed, but doesn’t understand how they get it: in the game, liberals support fascists only when they don’t know who the fascists are; in real life, it either doesn’t occur to them that there even could be fascists in This Great And Noble Nation, or they know that the fascists are fascists and, for any number of reasons, don’t care.

I want to be clear that I like the game. I just happen to find it really interesting when game design attempts to bring across a political message entirely through mechanics, and they seem to have wanted to do that. But this just wasn’t the right kind of game for it. Also Avalon is better.

[beardedmrbean]

Ah the theology of the Nation of Islam…the Yakub shit…which makes me want to play the orchestra version of uncle ruckus theme.

“There’s white officer, there the crazy ass imhotps that trying to destroy our precious America!”

Also it started here in Chicago, how the fuck we got Mr T from here but then Nation of Islam?

Also like the uncle Ben and Jemma thing, um white liberals have been to the south and meet southern blacks? Like…there a reason those images exist.

Also I been looking into pre 2010’s stuff, yes there are zoomers that remember stuff before the 2010’s. And when we talk about black struggles…expect roots…that really damage how we actually came to the Americas.

But back in the day we went “Yes there are still bigoted white people and politicians that trying to keep us down. But not every white person is evil.”

Now it’s since BLM “I AM BLACK HITLER, COMMANDER OF THE FOURTH REICH!”

Then the whole Killmonger thing where far more educated people will say he the voice of black Americans

So an Oakland [REDACTED N WORD] who joined the cia to being in destroying countries represents the issues between black Americans vs native Africans?

I’m pretty sure that the pan African bs is causing most strife between the two groups.

Seriously if Killmonger was written by a black writer without a persecution complex (not saying Ryan Coogler is super racist just…god idea modern black creators can’t leave the plantation)

Killmonger would have his jaw punch off by another black American character like War Machine and Nick Fury.

Also give Wakanda the middle finger it’s desperately needs

“Fuck you aristocrats, black Americans are part of space travel history while your asses did nothing for us. Byyyye 🖕”

Though probably I’m not race obsessed as the current black panther writers. But I would make black Americans characters that ensured the Wakandans are uncomfortable af around them.

NoI is fun because they're not secretive about anything really, not their weird ass Yakub invented white people to punish black people, they blatant racism which they just seem to feel really really proud of for some reason (should have linked up with mugabe and moved to Zimbabwe formed their own little commune where they could be super black), their Antisemitism, oh and the fact that they've stolen pretty much every part of the 3 main Abrahamic faiths they liked and then claimed they were doing that first even though Wallace Fard Muhammad didn't start proselytizing till 1930.

And that was in Detroit not Chicago, they moved their home base, you can scratch that off of your shame list.

First real leader of the group Elijah Muhammad is absolutely not fooling anyone with that name choice.

Also like the uncle Ben and Jemma thing, um white liberals have been to the south and meet southern blacks? Like…there a reason those images exist.

Free to make their own decisions people took up these roles and became icons, but ya so many decades later people with no grasp on history screw it up.

Really should have done some polling on that one, and several others.

“Fuck you aristocrats, black Americans are part of space travel history while your asses did nothing for us. Byyyye 🖕”

I remember hearing about something in the comics wakanda had a cure for cancer but wouldn't share it, which there was some cheering for that right up till it was pointed out to the cheering readers that this meant more than white people would be dying of cancer as a result.

Maybe sickle cell would have hit harder.

But back in the day we went “Yes there are still bigoted white people and politicians that trying to keep us down. But not every white person is evil.”

Almost skipped this bit.

Check the timeline for the death of the occupy movement and the birth of the blm movement, as I've said before it's not a coincidence, once again class solidarity was forming.

That's not allowed because then the elites get voted out.

Staci Abrams and Maxine Waters are just as scared of that as any white politician you can think of.

[morningstargirl666]

Tagged by @garglyswoof and @purplesigebert. I honestly don’t rewatch films as much nowadays, since I just watch a LOT of films in general and don’t have any remaining time to rewatch stuff as well. But I do have a load of comfort movies I think, so here we go.

Top 10 Comfort Movies (in no particular order)

1. Ever After (1998) Because Gabby made an excellent point, that movie is amazing, it’s pretty historically accurate and has some good moral life lessons thrown in. Cinderella movies, just in general, are a comfort movie for me, and I went through a phase when I was younger of just watching every variation ever made (even the shitty versions, much to my horror).

2. A Cinderella Story (2004) Again, it’s a cinderella movie, and an iconic one at that. I’m a secret romantic at heart.

3. Deathnote (2017) Yes I realise this was generally hated by all. But this was my first introduction to Death Note (I binge watched the anime series straight after don’t worry) and whatever your grievances for this movie, William Dafoe is brilliant at whatever he does, and playing Ryuk is no different. For a live action adaptation, I thought the design of Ryuk was pretty spot on and beautifully terrifying, and although the storyline crosses over into cheesy American, it’s easy to watch. Which is why it ended up as a comfort movie for me while I was taking my GCSEs - I often put it on in the background while working on my art coursework.

4. The Day After Tomorrow (2004) Here’s the thing guys - disaster movies are my comfort movies. I don’t know why. Maybe it’s the bitter, Gen-Z in me, but I enjoy watching the world descend into chaos and destruction. They’re easy to watch, the good guys often prevail against the ruthless attack of nature herself in the end, and idk, I like seeing a little death, a little fire. I’m just made different. Sometimes the shittier the disaster movie the better, so I’m talking things like Greenland (2020), Geostorm (2017) etc. That being said, zombie movies also fall into this category, just love all kinds.

5. White House Down (2013) Along the similar vein as disaster movies, I love the-government-is-under-attack movies, so the Olympus Has Fallen (2013) trilogy too. Just something about very American, cheesy action movies that are just easy to watch, require no brain power, and are just a fun ride.

6. Don’t Look Up (2021) Did I mention disaster movies are my jam? This one is pretty political, but I’m British, so I think I also enjoyed it so much because I can just sit to the side, eating my popcorn, and watch as the shitshow enfolds like the chaos gremlin I am, with no true existential crisis about how doomed my country is. 

7. Inglorious Basterds (2009) Quentin Tarantino is an amazing filmmaker on a whole, and although gory, brutal and - let’s face it - a little crazy, his movies are always a blast to watch. And you get to see the characters kill a load of Nazis, inlcuding Hitler, so it’s a win win.

8. Love Actually (2003) Felt obligated to put another rom-com on here because I can be a normal person and watch rom-coms for comfort (I promise). It’s also a christmas movie, so like will only watch it around December, but eh, still counts.

9. The Impossible (2012) Another disaster movie, but it’s a true story this time, and I’ve re-watched this one a lot. It’s sad and angsty yes, but there’s something hopeful about the family reuniting after such a traumatic event, and how humanity comes together in crisis to help each other.

10. The Batman (2022) Maybe it’s become a comfort movie because I’ve rewatched it so many times for my dissertation but I really love this film, and I can’t get enough of it. I just love every aspect about it. And will get a craving where I’m like ‘I need to watch The Batman again’. And so I do.

Lol and that’s it. I will say I tend to watch Friends now if I want something on in the background, or just something to cheer me up. That’s my all-time piece of comfort media I tend to watch. Otherwise, these also work. And I love them all.

[childofaura]

Everyone’s making a post, so I will too (Love, Death & Robots S3)

I know everyone else will already be giving their opinions on Love Death and Robots Season 3, but I have to get my opinions out too, and pretend like people wanna know what I have to say on it lol.

I will say it was underwhelming, though, and the complaint I’ve seen of people saying the company went back on their word over having more 2D animation is completely valid. There should have been way more 2D animated episodes and I’m actually a little pissed they didn’t hire the studio who did Zima Blue and Ice.

Also the NFT bullshit at the end is bullshit. But we are here to talk about the animated shorts themselves, where the studios probably had no part in the NFT bullshit.

Under the cut so as not to spoil anything for those who haven’t watched it:

1. Three Robots: Exit Strategies

Sorry, I saw the political jokes and I just skipped over this one. Legit I don’t care what side it’s poking, I just don’t wanna deal with politics right now. Judge me how you will, I probably deserve it.

2. Bad Travelling

YESSSS, HERE WE GO. RIGHT BACK ON TRACK. The violence in this episode was BRUTAL. The opening was immediately attention catching and I was NOT expecting this monster was gonna be the overall antagonist, thought it would be somewhat of a “charting into monster territory” type of episode. Fascinating that the monster had a form of communication and the gross rotting of its “puppet�� was great. Torrin himself was a fantastic character, it’s incredible how one wall-flower of a character at the beginning ends up being so clever, resourceful, and at the same time (somewhat) morally sound. I think it was the same studio that animated The Secret War, because despite the realistic CGI, the characters were all stylized the same way.

10/10 episode, probably the best one in my opinion.

3. The Very Pulse of the Machine

I’m kind of mixed on this one. I liked the acting and even though this episode ends up tripping balls, I can’t really say I’m satisfied with the ending. All that work and the main character ends up throwing herself into the planet’s burning liquid. The planet’s supposed to have a level of sentience but we really can’t say if the planet is good or not; it DID cause an explosion that killed one of the other ladies.

I did like the voice acting though, it was really convincing. I liked the animation style too. Just can’t get behind the story, nor the ending. 6/10.

4. Night of the Mini-Dead.

Honestly I’m not even gonna put this one on a rating scale, it was just a funny dumb little animation. I’ll admit I chuckled here and there. It was fun and it’s way better than half of the shitty animations we got from S1 and S2 like the Hitler shit and the yogurt.

5. Kill Team Kill.

The ONLY 2D animation we got. And it was fun! I liked the character designs, the premise was so goofy that I got a laugh out of it. Felt some of the references were too forced, like the honey badger meme and the Bane meme, but some of the jokes got pretty funny. Also like how the one soldier got attached to the drone. Animation was gorgeous and fluid, the character designs were good, and the ending made me laugh. 9/10

6. Swarm

Ok. Unpopular opinion. You are all probably going to hate me for this and that’s okay, but let it be known that this is just my opinion.

I hate Swarm for the same reasons I hated Beyond the Aquila Rift. And yeah, I hated Beyond the Aquila Rift.

I don’t like the animation, but I will note the positives about the animation: It’s flawless CGI, and it works perfectly for the space environments and the Swarm’s organisms. And it did work for the body horror at the end.

That being said, this story is literally a carbon copy of Aquila Rift’s basic plot points, right down to the forced sex scene. I’m not here to watch porn, I’m here to watch interesting stories; the porn serves no purpose to the plot. I respect people’s opinion on this and Aquila Rift, but I don’t know why people think those are the best ones... unless it’s BECAUSE of the sex. And the CGI has nothing notable or interesting going for it. 4/10. I’d rate it lower but that ending scene made it better. I know that this anthology is supposed to be NSFW but if we’re being honest, it’s more that it doesn’t really add to the story; you could cut out the sex scenes in both Aquila’s Rift and Swarm and the story-telling could still illustrate the relationship between the main characters and their love interests.

7. Mason’s Rats.

Me: *Hears the most Scottish accent I ever heard.*

Me: Is that Craig Ferguson?

Me after watching the credits: I KNEW IT!!

Anyways, this one was goofy. I can’t say it’s fun because I have such a soft spot for any type of rodent (mice, rats, hamsters, squirrels, etc etc etc) so even seeing all those rats being brutally murdered made me sad. And apparently it made the farmer sad too, lol. I like that they went with a Scottish farmer because it made the dialogue that much more entertaining. I like the happy ending too, glad it got resolved the way it did. Still sad all those rats died though ;A; But it gets about a 7 or 8 out of 10.

8. In Vaulted Halls Entombed

Pretty sure this was the same studio that animated Shape-Shifters.

And like Shape-Shifters, it made me sad over the deaths of characters I had maybe five minutes with. I love the dynamic between all of them, and the horror aspect of this episode was PERFECT. I was absolutely freaked out watching this because I had no idea where it was gonna go. I will say Cthulu being in there was... weird, I guess? I feel like after the terrifying piranha spider thingies, they should have gone with something different, but it wasn’t awful. Just a little bit of a weird direction choice. Also Jeff Schine was one of the characters (can’t remember which one) so that’s always nice. The ending was freaky as fuck but I think that was neat. 8/10.

9. Jibaro

... Holy shit, we really only got nine episodes for Season 3? That feels like bullshit.

Anyways. Jibaro. I’m very mixed on this one, and most of this evaluation is based strongly on opinion. It’s the same studio that did The Witness, so the balls-to-the-walls camerawork made sense. The audio can be really jarring as someone with sensory issues, but I’m not faulting the episode for that, because it’s supposed to push how the main character is deaf. So it’s clever. The camerawork makes it a bit hard to track everything, but it adds to the frenetic energy of everything going on.

I will say though that the problems with this short lie in the story itself. Our main guy is completely deaf, so he can resist the water-lady (I’m calling her that) screaming out for people to drown to her death. She does this on purpose to kill people, and the group at the beginning wasn’t even aware that she was there, nor were they trying to harm her; she just kills them. Homeboy is completely deaf and that’s his buff against this killer spirit. He manages to gain an advantage and takes her stuff. SOMEHOW there is river magic or whatever the fuck that gives him his hearing back, and now water-lady (who I assume the show was trying to make us feel bad for her because we see her grieving over the loss of her jewelry and gold scales) is able to kill him.

... Girl, what? You’re out here drowning people; you got your ass kicked fair and square and you probably deserved worse. Homeboy deserved his win, and he didn’t deserve to magically have his hearing restored. 7/10, I call bullshit.

[unbiasedcabaret]

love death + robots

objectively the most badass name for a tv show

anyways here's my review of the first season. it is ranked. but rankings change depending on whether I wanna look at pretty animation or be invested in characters/story. there are short, slightly (extremely) stupid reviews next to them too.

(Also rankings are so hard. Am I basing it off of rewatchability? how impressed I was on the first watch? would I want to go back to that world? the animation? the characters? my investment in the story? Currently, I'm going off of what feels right and how excited it makes me basically)

18. The Dump: Eh. I couldn’t get into it. Boring animation, like it was definitely good quality, but nothing particularly interesting. Like okay, dumpster monster. Cool cool cool. This felt so long when it was relatively a shorter episode.

17. Alternate Histories: Never have I been so disappointed so fast. The premise sounded so cool, I was really hoping they’d go realistic with this one, explore some really interesting theories/possibilities. If I look at it objectively, pretty okay. I liked hitler’s long legs, did not enjoy the weird prostitute part, and had an okay time at the ending. Eh.

16. When the Yogurt Took Over: I don’t get it. Oh wow, humans are so dumb even the yogurt left us. Or oh wow they were so smart they got everything they wanted genius yogurt. Okay so? I didn’t care about anything happening, because I got over it kinda fast.

15. Lucky 13: Fun. I love pilots loving their ships, especially with this slightly sentient(?) ship thing going on. I enjoyed the rise to the top, could’ve been a less predictable fall perhaps.

14. Ice Age: Great start, I was hooked from the second the civilization started developing. Might’ve helped that I was high as fuck while watching this. Didn’t really go anywhere, there was no resolution, no reason, nothing. Honestly just felt a little underdeveloped, they should’ve pushed it a little. Very cool premise though.

13. Beyond the Aquila Rift: I don’t fully get the hype not gonna lie. Like I was interested definitely but the twist didn’t blow my mind it just seemed like it made sense. Didn’t have the ‘oh fuck’ moment and wasn’t especially blown away by the animation

12. Sucker of Souls: My favourite part of this was when they literally killed the exchange student. Very fun. Also when his head was split in half and it split into layers. Other than that, eh. The cat thing was interesting but then they never actually used it so what was the point. It just went nowhere and wasn’t that cool. Okay, I take that back the chase scenes/fight scenes/anything action was very engaging.

11. Shape-Shifters: I agree with that one guy who said bad-ass. I love it when fight scenes are actually all out because you KNOW motherfuckers tend to hold back for the sake of plot or whatever. I like it as a short though because it’s interesting to think about, I’m just not too interested in seeing where it goes after. (Which is a good thing because they did all the fun things in the short).

10. Three Robots: Really interesting, loved the characters, loved their skewed understanding of human history (kinda makes me question how much we really know about the past). Odd ending but high me was impressed

9. The Secret War: I was super into it. I love a good fight scene, great backstory, great animation. I just watched Aquaman and the creatures reminded me of those guys from the trench, especially with the flare at the end and I’m not complaining.

8. Blindspot: Why does this episode get hate. It’s a heist with robots how is it boring. I personally love heists, especially in the fast&furious style thing. I loved the characters too, and I’m now questioning my ability to get attached to robots this fast. Also enjoyed the murder, because I’m so used to people being saved at the last minute. I would definitely watch the fuck out of this movie because there could definitely be fun ways to fuck with the whole ‘there are no stakes because we can’t die’ thing.

7. Suits: PERFECT. So perfect there is nothing wrong with this like absolutely nothing wrong. I was into it, loved the robots, loved the characters, loved the world. Would wanna go back into this world and see more of it. Just the idea of casual alien encounters is so fun to me. I’d definitely watch this movie. Honestly felt bad when Jake died which is surprising with an 18-minute runtime. Basically, I view this as a little Pixar version of the show and I had a fun time.

6. Fish Night: So pretty so mesmerising so mystical. I wish the fish part went on for longer I would’ve watched the shit out of it. I kinda wanna go and see that whole scene again. Great short. Very perfect.

5. Helping Hand: Gravity but gory. Did not see it coming so it was a very fun surprise. Nothing wrong with this and I would watch again. Especially liked the part where no one somehow managed to save her and she figured it out on her own. (Not from a feminist point of view, more from a predictability point of view)

4. Sonnie’s Edge: Brilliant fucking animation (when the neon outfits/parts thing came I had to replay several times), great fight scene. I shouldn’t have been deceived by that dude’s girlfriend but she was good, so when she extended her nails through Sonnie’s skull it was great. Apart from the animation and the direction, the story did kinda fall flat now that I think about it. Like it felt a bit, okay so? types I think.

3. Good Hunting: Very great animation, great story, great storytelling. Loved the world and the way the world developed. Loved the automatons. Loved the combination of magic and machine. I didn’t expect her to be able to transform at the end so that was extremely fucking cool. Loved that she got her agency back and that the son was able to break away from his father’s habits. Hated seeing that one guy’s dick.

2. The Witness: SEXIEST animation. Spider-verse vibes especially with the bang! or whatever and I wish there was so much more of this. I was definitely more interested in the action sequences than in the weird sex stuff mostly because I saw no point to that. What was the point of the whole vladmir character when we don’t even know what he’s like. Like he was given way too much importance in my opinion. Technically she didn’t even have to leave that room. The loop stuff was pretty cool though like I had to go back to the beginning to make sure because- slight mindfuck. But I think this animation, and this beautiful beautiful world, was wasted on this average ass story. Could’ve been way cooler.

1. Zima Blue: Oh god this was a good fucking episode. Didn’t think it was gonna be this good. First of all the art itself was so cool. The were spray painting literal space rocks you cannot get more anything than that. Then his whole story? His origin? His truth? FUCK me. Also the animation was so distinct. It was so, it’s own. So specific. And it worked so well with the story. I don’t want anymore of this short in the best way possible. Also I thought of this art thing that starts like this but the blue starts becoming better and then a whole universe comes out of the blue and it starts right back where he started - murals of the universe. And his final work is a universe with like a tiny blue square to show that it repeats forever? Idk what that means but I kinda wanna make it but it’d definitely be plagiarism. Also I can’t do art.

[smilesthroughfandoms]

Random List of things I want from episodes of Hazbin Hotel (and Helluva Boss) when it gets greenlit cause we all know it will

Mimzy, Baxter, and Crymini joining the hotel. Think that's a pretty obvious one.

Mimzy and Alastor backstory, I know that info on Mimz being in love with Al is probably outdated but I think it would be fun if they still at least knew each other in life. (Were the friends? How close were they? Did Al fucking kill Mimzy, if so was it an accident or on purpose?) The sky’s the limit here!

On that note: Backstories on how each mortal soul involved in the Hotel ended up in Hell. Especially people who (for now) it’s kinda tricker to imagine why/how they ended up in Hell in the first place. I’m namely thinking of Vaggie and Niffty. Vaggie is a little more believable cause of her apparent reliance on weapons the first sign of trouble. But Niffty is a sweet little sugar bean who I imagine is legally forbidden from saying bad words. 

I’d like to see why Niffty ended up in a Hell cause I'm a sucker for the “Cinnamon Roll is actually Deadly Murder Baby” trope, don't judge me.

Royal Family Backstory! How did Lucifer and Lillith meet? How did they acquire their stations? When was Charlie born and how did this affect hell’s demographics, particularly in the realization that “Shit, some of us can create kids here”

Also, what other biblical figures are canon in Hazbin Hell? We already saw Stolas (though I’m still unsure if he’s the Stolas in bible or this is just, like, an avatar or version of him or something). Is Beezlebub in Hell? 

What about historical figures? Jeffery Dahmer and probably Lizzie Borden (that ax chick from Charlie’s song). Is Hitler in Hell? What about Vlad the Impaler or John Wayne Gacy?

I want Lucifer to be voiced by Weird Al. No, I will not explain or apologize for this wish.

More musical numbers!

Valentino backstory and his relationship to Angel Dust (Ik Vivz said this would be explained more in those comics but c’mon, it’d be a cool episode too).

Rosie, Vox, and other overlord backstories. I also wanna know who that cute overlord girl was with Vox and Val in the opening. She’s so cute and looks fun.

Vaggie and Alastor team up for some reason. I know they don’t really like or trust one another but I think they could play well off each other. Also character building.

Angel Dust and Charlie team up as well. Maybe a subplot to the above. More character development!

Sir Pentious, Cherri Bomb, and the Egg bois join the Hotel because why not and it’d be fun.

Angel gets a boyfriend. Cherri gets a girlfriend. 

Chaggie moments. I want their relationship to be shown in the same way Moxxie and Millie’s relationship was.

Who are the Von Eldritch family? Why to Helsa and Charlie not get along? Who is the son and why did he and Charlie break-up? What did their parents think of this? How does Vaggie (if at all) factor into this?

An episode where they focus on all the background characters in Hell (kinda like that one episode of Gumball).

Angel telling Val where to stick it being framed as him finally, seriously, giving redemption a shot.

Alastor and Vox fight framed like a big anime showdown no I will not apologize for this either, deal with it.

ALASTOR FROWNING!!!!!!

NIffty having a habit of saying really dark, morbid, depressing, horrifying things in the bubbliest, happiest voice in all of Hell. Everyone is kinda unnerved by it.

Husk is an odd combo of Rick Sanches and Grunkle Stan.

Baxter making inventing or “creating” something that destroys something in the Hotel off-screen. It becomes a running gag.

A running gag of Alastor literally shoving anyone out of the way to talk to Charlie.

Mimzy somehow becoming the mom friend despite being terrible at it.

This kind of conversation: Angel Dust: What’re you doing? Crymini: Teenage Rebellion. Angel: Fuq yeah, stick it to the old people!

An episode where Sir Pentious tries to destroy the Hotel and goes whole ham to do it... but no one in the Hotel ever notices his schemes or accidentally thwarts him without even trying,

Tom bitch slapping Katie. He deserves too.

Are there other religions in this universe? Did God and Lucifer inadvertently kick out all the old-timey deities in their rise to power?

Are any of said deities or mythological characters in Hell? Do they like it there? Do they deserve it? Again, sky’s the limit

A crossover with Helluva Boss

Or at least references back and forth.

Blitzo and Stola’s relationship played with more, but not necessarily Blitzo ending up with Stolas. Although if Stolas has good character development I could change my mind

More Moxxie and Millie relationship. They’re so cute!

Baby Loona and Blitzo adopting Loona. That is all.

That bratty kid becoming a sitcom archnemesis for I.M.P. but no one taking it seriously.

Stolas and Blitzo busting their asses off to keep whatever they have a secret from Stolas’s wife. But she knows, she has known for a long time (Blitz did tell her that first time) and she actively encourages is because hey, she’s sleeping with someone else besides her husband. Stolas and Blitzo’s reaction can vary.

Moxxie, Millie, and Loona memeing on Blitzo whenever Stolas calls. Like, yeah, they don’t like Stolas much either, but still, Blitz kinda had it coming.

Stolas gets a musical number. But not a good one. More on the lines of this. 

On that note, maybe something like a Starkid musical episode? C’mon, it fits.

I want Charlie and Stolas to know each other. Not friends but at least they know each other. Royalty and all...

Blitzo family backstory? Who are those ladies in the poster with him? Was he actually in a circus? How did the O become silent in his name?

Stolas’s daughter, Natasha (or Tasha, whatever) shows up. Maybe she’s the spoiled, bratty, daddy’s little girl trope. OR EVEN BETTER: She’s a mix of E.B. from the Netflix Green Eggs and Ham and Louise from Bob’s Burgers. Let her be smart! Let her start working for I.M.P. and run it better than any of them.

Tasha actually has a strong moral compass and actually kinda likes Charlie’s idea and wants to help, but she’s a kid and her dad says she can’t so... (She probably does anyway or Charlie tells Tasha to come back and help when she’s a bit older and has more freedom from her parents.

Blitzo and Angel Dust meeting, tell me that wouldn’t kick ass. (And Stolas meeting Angel Dust and getting “I’m here to steal yo man” vibes from him). Whether Angel and Blitzo hit it off that way is completely arbitrary.

A crossover of Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss culminating in the entire crew having to defeat some big baddie and it kicks ass.

More found family tropes in general. That’s the good shit.

That’s all I got for now. Feel free to reblog and add on!

[leverage-ot3]

notable moments from The Lost Hier Job

leverage 2.09

(Sophie opens her curtains and looks out the window. A knock comes to the door and she goes to look through the peep hole, then immediately opens the door)

Sophie: Who's dead?

Nate: No, no. Everybody's okay. Can I...

Sophie: Huh?

Nate: I-I...

(Sophie lets Nate into the room)

Sophie: Oh. Y-You scared the life out of me.

HER FIRST FEAR IS THAT SOMEONE DIED OR GOT HURT

SOPHIE IS THEIR MOM FIRST BEFORE EVERYTHING

- - - - -

Nate: Oh, yeah. No, we're doing fine. I mean, yeah. Everything's, I mean, it kind of went from a quintet to what we are now, a quartet. I mean, it's like, we still know how to play. We sound good, you know. But something is, uh, sounding a little bit, uh, you know, wrong.

Sophie: Huh. Well, I hope that I’m, I really hope I’m not the violist because when I was little, my mum made me have lessons, and I was rubbish. I was completely rubbish. I can't play a note. Not a single note

- - - - -

Tara: Either I am in, or Ruth is out. It's your choice. (walks away)

Nate: They are gonna hate this.

[Leverage HQ]

Eliot: I hate this.

Hardison: You do not let Vicki Vale into the Batcave ever.

Nate: First, this is my home, not a cave. And, second, we're not gonna allow her up here.

Parker: Sophie would never approve. Call her.

Nate: We can't just keep calling Sophie.

Hardison: Oh, okay. I see how it is. We can't call her, but you can go off and have a little secret meeting with her.

Nate: Secret meeting? What are you talking about? I was in Harrisburg, researching a client.

Hardison: Wow, ‘cause you know what? (hits remote and pulls information up on monitor) Your passport got dinged going through Heathrow airport yesterday. Heathrow's in London. I guess you couldn't get a direct flight over to Harrisburg.

Eliot: Well, it's hard when you do the same-day booking.

Hardison: Yeah, 'cause you had to go with the -- Did you realize that London is the home of the most surveillance cameras in the world?

Parker: Really?

Hardison: Who feels like playing "where's Waldo"?

Parker: Oh. Yeah. (raises hand)

Hardison: I do. (hits remote to show video on monitors) Oh. There's Waldo right there. Waldo Ford. Oh, oh. Is that big Ben and you? Wow. You got twins and triplets everywhere. And looky there. 11:18 am standing outside of Sophie’s apartment, Looking quite pensive.

Parker: Aww. He's rehearsing what he's gonna say. I've seen him do that.

Nate: All right, all right, all right, guys. Okay. Yeah. You caught me. I went to London. Yeah. I saw Sophie. And she's not coming back.

Parker: Not now or not ever?

Nate: I don't know. And I don't, I don't think she knows either. So, uh, that's that. Could you please take the...

(Hardison darkens the monitors)

parker wearing that bright yellow flannel? adorable

parker and eliot look DELIGHTED as hardison fucks with nate it’s great

- - - - -

Hardison: Tara Carlisle. She checks out. Civil-Rights lawyer, does a lot of pro bono work. Collects lost causes like kittens.

Eliot: Well, she's honest.

Hardison: Crusader. Incorruptible.

(Tara pulls up and gets out of her car)

Hardison: And one sexy librarian

I saw a headcanon that Tara did actually do this on the side for a living, because, if you think about it, could she really fake a file THAT GOOD to fool hardison, the best hacker in the world

- - - - -

we love to see parker in the vents

- - - - -

EVEN IN P R I S O N HARDISON GETS HIS ORANGE SODA

- - - - -

(Frank slides the back from a photo to find a Nazi flag and a photo of Hitler. He carries it over to where Orson is standing between Hardison and Eliot)

Hardison: My god, he is Aryan nation

LMFAO

- - - - -

(Blanchard enters room reading a file. He looks up to see Nate on a ladder tearing pages from a law book and clears his throat. Nate looks over at him)

can someone PLEASE make a compilation of nate’s characters being obnoxious and chaotic pretty please

- - - - -

parker’s sMOOTH exit from the vents into a flip I am in LOVE with her

- - - - -

Hardison: I tied the adoption-Reference number to the medical records of one of Parker's aliases. Social security, taxes, long record of drug offenses. Anybody short of the CIA is gonna believe that is Kimball’s daughter.

he’s so good at this I love it

- - - - -

(hiding behind a broken crate, Lind points a gun at Parker and Hardison. Eliot sees this as he approaches)

Eliot: Nate!

(Lind fires, shattering the passenger’s side window. Eliot runs forward, bends to pick up a rock, and throws it at Lind, hitting him in the head. He fires again, shooting out the tire as Nate runs around the car. Lind swings the gun at Eliot, who catches it. Lind punches Eliot in the stomach and Eliot hits Lind in the face with the gun. Eliot throws the gun down as Lind stumbles back for more)

Eliot: Come on!

(Lind swings, Eliot ducks and hits Lind in the ribs, then pushes him away. Lind turns around and swings but Eliot blocks his punches, grabbing him and throwing him to the ground. Lind gets up and looks at the gun. Eliot picks up the gun)

Eliot: You want this?

(Lind holds up his hands and moves away, running. Nate and Parker move out from behind the car. Eliot unloads the gun and tosses it aside)

when eliot sees the sniper and is terrified? when he manages to pick up a rock and nail the sniper in the face with it while running? his FURY when he’s fighting him? he’ll do anything to protect his family

- - - - -

(Eliot and Parker walk past a sunglasses vendor. Eliot bumps a table for a distraction and Parker grabs two pairs of sunglasses, handing one to Eliot)

Eliot: Are you kidding me? (puts on the glasses) Look at this.

THEYRE SO IN SYNC I LOVE IT

also married complaining about the style of the sunglasses? we love to see it

- - - - -

(Eliot and Parker run through a hallway)

Parker: We're cut off. We're gonna have to get rough.

Eliot: I ain't hitting cops.

(a noise from behind has them looking back)

Parker: I look forward to seeing you explain that

remember that one commentary with john rogers where he said in this scene beth changed her lines/energy to more of a kinky vibe that made the scene that much better? because I do and boy was this scene charged with something interesting

- - - - -

Eliot: All right. Be cool.

(Eliot unloads the gun and catches the bullet)

Eliot: All right. Nothing's gonna happen to anybody. Just settle down.

(The officer raises a stun gun that Eliot knocks out of his hand and Parker catches)

Eliot: You’re not using a stun gun either

(Eliot pushes the officer back and Parker points the stun gun at the officer)

Eliot: Hold on. Stop. Chill. All right? Nobody's gonna get hurt.

(another officer steps out behind Parker, his gun raised)

Officer: Drop it!

(Parker points the stun gun under her arm and hits the officer, knocking him down)

Eliot (to Parker): Seriously? What are you doin’?

Parker: Mmm.

Eliot (to officer): Listen, it's probably best if you pretend that you never saw us. Okay?

(Eliot and Parker move down the hall past the fallen officer. Parker triggers the stun gun again)

Eliot: Stop

parker loves tasing people and eliot is exhausted

- - - - -

Nate: Hey, Parker, forget about the hearing. I need you to do something else.

(Parker pulls files from the safe in Blanchard’s office, proudly kissing it)

SHES BABY YOUR HONOR

- - - - -

Blanchard: What the hell is this? Hey, you don't understand!

(the officers drag Blanchard to the exit)

Blanchard: These people are thieves! I don’t even think that one’s a lawyer!

someone also make a compilation of their marks swearing they’re not who they say they are. I just think it’s funny and chaotic

- - - - -

parker hardison and eliot all walk in together (TOGETHER)

also both parker and eliot are wearing flannel

- - - - -

Parker: I bet you're not even a lawyer.

Tara: Oh. Sophie was right. You are adorable.

Parker: Excuse me?

(Eliot, Parker and Hardison talk angrily at her for several moments as Nate reads what’s in the envelope)

some highlights that I was able to hear from all of them talking over each other:

- Eliot: Don’t comment and say that kinda stuff. You don’t know us at all.

- Hardison: Woah, you’re overstepping here

- Parker: You don’t get to call me adorable. You don’t get to say that.

basically the boys jump to her defense and I love it

also SOPHIE CANONICALLY TOLD TARA PARKER WAS ADORABLE THATS SO SWEET

- - - - -

Hardison: Whoa, whoa, hold up. Mnh-Mnh. Hold up, hold up. What is this?

Tara: Oh, it’s a bill, for my cut of the inheritance. Hey, I’m not a candy striper. This is my job.

(Eliot, Hardison and Parker look at Nate, who nods)

Tara: There. See? We're getting paid already. It's gonna be fun.

[thesleeplessb]

What's up with straight white dudes giving the worst possible endings to their tv series ??

I guess I shouldn't be suprised but they keep lowering the bar like it's almost a competition. Do they have a secret club where they meet every week to come up with ideas to piss off their fans ?

The sad reality is that there is a huge connection to these shows ending badly and them being loved by girls/young women, queers and POC. Like, are they so upset that their main demographic is the one society just loves to hate (just think about Twilight, One direction, BTS), that they just fuck up their own work as a revenge scheme ?? It may not be it, but it does look like it.

It may seem like I'm exaggerating here but Sarah Z. on youtube made a really good video essay on the Sherlock fandom where she made a great point that underlines how the creators actively incited the fandom to look for secret clues and then made fun of them in an episode of the show for being so invested. Or how they have jokes and hints about John and Sherlock being gay from the 1st episode and then act like it is crazy to think they actually may be gay.

And from what I have gathered this is also done in a similar fashion in Supernatural, where they actually have an episode where a fangirl writes some kind of play on their story and the actresses for Dean and Castiel (2 girls) are together in real life (when I found out about this being an actual thing I was so speechless). And obviously the jokes and hints about the "gayness" are also heavily present here too.

Misogyny also seem to be a pretty common factor. I am not well versed on Supernatural, but it does seem the fandom all agrees that their treatment of women is absolutely awful and the same is for POC characters. And seeing that the ending only involves a nameless faceless woman and no POC, does lead me to just trust them on this.

Only thinking about the Game of thrones treatment of women makes my skin crawl. Daenerys, the most powerful woman in the story, was transformed into a Hitler figure and one of the main causes they provide for this happening is the death of her best friend, a woman of color, and they have her killed by the man she loves while he kisses her, while still framing him like a tragic hero who had to do it (BIG YIKES). They had Brienne, another powerful women, betrayed by the man she just made love to, so that he could go back to be with his sister/lover, and at the end she still does a good thing in his memory (have some more YIKES). Even Sansa, who seems to have a pretty good ending as Lady of Winterfell, obtained it by alienating another woman and betraying her because as the writer said "she was jealous she was prettier than her" (the YIKES never stop). And those are just 3 examples.

The 100 also follows these trends, even if they tried to hide it more. We have a classic bury your gays with Lexa and even if they do treat the love story as important, they still do not give a good resolution to the couple. There are other queer couples or characters but they are very sidelined. The women are very powerful and good representation most of the time, but there is this bad trend of making women good because they are mothers or mother figures. This reaches a point where to have a redemption arc these women either need to have a baby or be a mother figure to one and the main character is reduced to being her child protector and nothing else. Don't get me wrong making powerful mothers is not bad in itself, but when it is a costant pattern it just seem to reduce women to their reproductive abilities. A similar thing happens to POC where they have great characters, but somehow they always end up sidelined or dead (again, YIKES). Also it has to be pointed out that one of the main POC characters got killed in the earliers season cause the actor didn't like the way the character was treated by the showrunner (even BIGGER YIKES, we don't know how the actor was mistreated, but I don't doubt he was).

So, I mean, these are a just few examples, but there seems to be some kind of pattern I don't like. Also sorry it became a rant but the more I thought about this the more I wanted to say.

I am very sorry for the way you were mistreated, you deserved better, like SO MUCH better.

P.S. if you have some good recommendations for shows put them in the comments. I love the Good Place and Agents of Shield, and both ended in a satisfying way.

[noonymoon]

You Have Been Lied To #4

hello again!

in the first few posts we have talked about

how the public narrative is carefully constructed by a global elite

how our entire perception of our past and how we came to be was shaped throughout history

how the myths and stories about a great flood and giants throughout all the cultures are real

how there are children going missing in massive amounts

and why they are going missing 1 & 2 

while i am not at all hurt on a personal level by the fact that many people start to unfollow me - i really don't care for status, fame, pleasure, distraction, an online-reputation, or ANYTHING at all anymore -, i am really saddened that only a fragment of people care for the Truth. the only thing i can do is keep going and pray that people will wake up in time. many others have begun to wake up (a lot of people woke up because of the Qanon movement but i am not a Qanon).

in this post today, i'm going to shed light on what Nazi-Germany actually was. i personally didn't dig deep into my own research because i am entirely overloaded with all kinds of researches and Hitler is not really my favourite topic in the world. but i've read a great book that pulls from many well-researched sources, plus i am using my common sense. when you can count 2+2 together and it makes sense, you know that ist is the Truth. the 2+2 we are going to look at today is the following:

- we've learned that the mainstream media and the entertainment media serves mainly two agendas: 1. to keep the truth away from us, and 2. to shape our perception of WHAT is possible, what is fantasy, what is truth and what is just too crazy to be real. right?

so, according to this parameter, let me ask you the question: why do you think there are SO MANY movies and works about the Nazis being deep into occult knowledge and into mystical artifacts? Captain America: Civil War, Hellboy, Wolfenstein, the Indiana Jones series, Iron Sky, The Keep, and many others are part of this concealing of Truth. the reason why Hollywood wants us to believe that this thought is too fantastical and too absurd to be real is that the Nazis truly had religious interest in the occult.

here is a brief overview about the topic 

there are quotes by Hitler himself which make one think what the heck did he mean by that...? (looking at it from a public narrative perspective ofc)

according to what i've learned Hitler was a huge follower of the teachings of Madam Helena Blavatsky - who founded Theosophy, basically the doctrine where the New Age movement gets pretty much all its ideas, and on which all the secret societies are founded: the Knights Templar, Golden Dawn, Freemasons, Rosicrucians, Ordo Templi Orientis, Illuminati and many more.

this image alone speaks volumes once you realize what’s being communicated.

the Lemurians? the Atlanteans? THE ARYANS? after breaking the veil of deception that is around all of us, it couldn't be more obvious that Hitler was deep in the occult knowledge that was brought forth by Theosophy in 1875. it simply does not make sense at all that Hitlers only goal was to create a race that "has blonde hair and blue eyes" (though it plays a tiny role in this as well). Hitler truly believed with all his rotten heart that there is a race that is superior to regular humans. this religious belief burned in him and his Nazis like an insane fire and they went on a lot of expeditions around the world to find more occult knowledge and also a very specific thing which i am not mentioning yet.

there are a ton of actual real photos of Hitler and his Nazis in Tibet visiting the monks, and also Hitler in the Antarctica (which is a whole rabbit hole for itself but that one is really crazy *lol*) and whatever you've heard in the public why Hitler went to these places, it is not the Truth.

when i was still in this witchy community on here, i often saw posts that basically told Nazis to f*ck off and stop using Runes. back then i had no concept of why any Nazi would use the nordic runes except maybe the superficial thought of "Germans are germanics are nordics" or whatever *lol*, the Truth is, in Hitlers quest to unlock as much as occult knowledge as possible, he also visited Iceland and studied the Nordic Edda. [ Hitlers goddaughter was also named Edda, just throwing this in here ] - Guido von List (an Austrian living in Germany) was apparently the first one to assign mystical meanings to the nordic runes and founding an occult Religion named Wotanism, he died in 1919.

another thing i want to point out is the Swastika. you probably know that the Swastika is pretty much an ancient symbol and appears in ALL kinds of cultures of this world. there is a reason for this that goes deep beyond any regular comprehension, but the public narrative is that Hitler simply stole this symbol and made it a Nazi-Germany symbol, but the truth goes much, much, much deeper than that.

of course we can pretend like all of these connections are just "coincidences" and of course we can cling to the public narrative that is telling us lies, lies, lies. i dearly encourage everyone who wants to know the Truth about this world to start researching. in all of the previous posts i've mentioned and linked really good starting points. you don't have to be a Christian or believe in Jesus in order to find out about the world we live in (though, after discovering all of the pieces and puzzling them together, the most logical thought for me was to literally RUN towards Jesus and i know this is different for everybody but i am praying for you to find Him). i know a lot of this sounds crazy and flat-out foil-hat-kind of way. but always remember that this image of the Truth is on purpose. people who dig into the Truth get out-cast, people who discover the Truth and want to wake other people up are being labelled as wrong and crazy, get silenced, get threatened, get assassinated.

to say it in Hitlers very words: "Truth is not what is; Truth is what people believe it to be" .... sadly, that is very true in our society today. everyone just picks and chooses what they want to believe and there is no concept anymore of ultimate Truth because we are being lied to from each and every side. and i know this sounds radical and Noony how can you say something like this, and so on and so forth, i really GET IT. i understand that it sounds radical, i understand that it isn't what people WANT to hear. you can condemn me all that you want, i really do not care anymore, this is way too important than setting my own comfort above it. Truth is truth, and lies are lies.

one of my favourite scriptures in the Bible is "And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free." --- John 8:32 ... it could NOT be MORE accurate. it's actually mindblowing how relevant and true these thousand year old words are, especially today. i've never felt so light and free and happy and sane EVER before in my entire life. i've quit my psychopharmacy drugs a while ago (i've been taking prescription drugs for more than 10 years) and my life is looking just bright and wonderful right now, and this even though i almost died in April, still recovering from it. i am more courageous, more filled with love, more motivated, more friendly, more calm, my household is doing just fine, everything is clean and neat, i am doing my chores, my plants are thriving, and even though i am literally ALONE 24/7 (real life AND online) i never ever feel lonely. and i am living with wide open eyes and even though this world is HORRIBLE, i am peaceful now. the Truth really DOES make you free. i've stopped with all kinds of toxic things, from sugar to drugs, you name it. i don't crave neither stimulation nor attention anymore. it's incredible. i can only recommend it. what God and his prophets also foretold over 2000 years ago that it would be EXACTLY like this. "evil will be considered good, and good will be considered evil" - people who speak the truth and do the good deeds will be demonized by the masses.

doing witchcraft and magic and believing in the New Age NEVER felt evil because i was never harming anyone. and i am pretty sure that 99,5% of you people on here feel the exact same way. we are being conditioned by the entertainment media to believe that magic is wonderful, innocent and curious. Disney is doing a GREAT job easing little children into the concepts of magic and fantasy. and i know most of all people never harm anyone with their magic. and God didn't forbid us to do magic because he doesn't want us to have fun or to have a spiritual life, or because he thinks we don't deserve any of the things we can do for ourselves magically. God will HAPPILY provide each and every need of us. the reason why God forbid his people to practice magic, sorcery, divination and witchcraft is to protect us from being deceived. now, a lot of people will rebel mentally, and that's okay, i was the same way. before you haven't discovered the truth and combined all of the puzzle pieces, it really just doesn't make a lot of sense, is really provoking and sounds bad. i was really wrestling with all this myself. now, i am grateful to the Lord that this wrestling process ended up in me being OPEN to what He has to say, and discovering the Truth instead of rebelling and living a lie any further. Praise God for not giving up on me with my stubbornness.

today, i've listened to an interview with the Illuminati Defector that i've mentioned in an earlier post, who was going to be one of the highest ranks in the Illuminati (Queen Mother of Darkness). her name is Jessie Czebotar and she has made it her mission to bring light to this worldwide matter and help survivors being rescued. please listen to some of her interviews, it’s mind-blowing what she has to say.

honestly, when you realize how EVIL these people are and that they ARE witches and druids and that they USE the occult and witchcraft and magic on an EXTREMELY high and incredible level, the LAST thing you WANT is to continue doing the same thing. like. i am not judging anyone here, truly. because we simply do not know what's going on. but when you suddenly realize that EVIL PEOPLE like Hitler, like the Illuminati and the Freemasons and all of these secret occult societies did and ARE doing the same thing of which WE regular people think it's no big deal and it's okay, you simply wanna run, run, run from it as far as you possibly can. at least this is how i feel about it. i am not forcing anyone to believe me, i am simply encouraging you to at least find out why i am saying all these things to you, and then decide for yourself.

Jesus said that we will know them by their fruits. a good tree can only create good fruit and a bad tree can only create bad fruit. a good tree can not create bad fruit and a bad tree can not create good fruit. it's really quite simple.

God bless the ones that read this with an open mind.

[dillydedalus]

april reading

oh yeah this is a thing. anyway in april i read about uhhh.... first contact (twice), murderers on skis & victorian church politics

the yield, tara june winch a novel about indigenous australian identity and history (now and throughout the 20th century) in three narrative strands. imo the narrative strand that consists of a grandfather writing a dictionary of his language (wiradjuri) in order to prove a claim to some land is by far the strongest, but overall i liked this quite a lot. 3/5

land of big numbers, te-ping chen a solid short story collection focused on modern china and young(ish) chinese people, both in china and the diaspora. i particularly liked the stories that had some slighty surreal or speculative elements, such as one about fruit that strongly evoke emotions when eaten and a group of people stuck in a train station for months as the train is delayed, which imo use their speculative aspects in effective (if not super subtle) ways to talk about society. 3/5

the pear field, nana ekvtimishvili (tr. from georgian by elizabeth heighway) international booker prize longlist! a short, fairly depressing read about a 18-year-old girl at a post-soviet school for developmentally disabled childred (but also orphans, abandoned children & other random kids) who is trying to get a younger boy adopted by an american couple. there seem to be a lot of novels set at post-soviet orphanages etc & imo this is a well-executed example of the microgenre, with the pear field full of pears that are never picked bc they don’t taste right as a strong central image. 3/5

the warden, anthony trollope (chronicles of barsetshire #1) ah yes, a 6-part victorian series about church politics in an english town, exactly the kind of thing i’m interested in. not sure why i committed to at least the first two entries of the series but here we are. despite this lack of interest (and disagreement with most of the politics on display here) i found this quite charming; trollope has a gift for an amusing turn of phrase & making fun of his characters in benevolent ways. 3/5

the lesson, cadwell turnbull first contact scifi novel set on the virgin islands, where an alien ship arrives one day. the aliens seem benevolent & share helpful technology, but also react with extreme violence to any aggression. they claim to be on earth to study.... something, but it’s never entirely clear what. the book makes some interesting choices (like immediately skipping over the actual first contact to a few years in the future, when the aliens are already established on the islands) but i thought much of it was kinda disjointed and confusing. 2/5

the heart is a lonely hunter, carson mccullers look, i get it, it’s all about the isolation & alienation (& dare i say loneliness) of 4 miserable characters projecting their issues on the central character singer, who is kind and patient and also deaf and mute, thus making him the perfect receptacle for their issues without really having to connect with him as a person and how that isolation hinders them socially, artistically, emotionally, politically, but like... i didn’t really like it. i didn’t hate it but i just felt very meh about it all. 2.5/5

acht tage im mai: die letzte woche des dritten reiches, volker ulrich fascinating history book about the last week(ish) of the third reich, starting with the day of hitler’s suicide and ending with the total surrender (but with plenty of flashbacks and forwards), and looking at military&political leadership (german and allied) as well as prisoners of war, forced laborers, concentration camp prisoners, and everyone else. very interesting look at what kästner described as the “gap between the not-anymore and the not-yet.” 3.5/5

firekeeper’s daughter, angeline boulley) i’ve been mostly off the YA train for the last few years, but this was a really good example of contemporary YA with a focus on ~social issues. ANYWAY. this is YA crime novel about daunis, a mixed-race unenrolled ojibwe girl close to finishing high school who is struggling with family problems, university plans, and feeling caught between her white and her native familiy when her best friend is shot in front of her and she decides to become a CI for an fbi investigation into meth production in the community. i really appreciated how hard this went both with the broader social issues (racism, addiction) and daunis’ personal struggles. there are a few bits that felt a bit didactic & on the nose (and the romance... oh well), but overall the themes of community, family, and the value of living indigenous culture are really well done & i teared up several times. 4/5

the magic toyshop, angela carter i love carter’s short stories but struggle with (while still liking) her novels so far. this one, a tale of melanie, suddenly orphaned after trying on her mother’s wedding dress in the garden, coming of age and awakening to womanhood or whatever. carter’s really into that. it’s well-written, sensual as carter always is, and the family melanie and her siblings are sent to, her tyrannical puppet-maker uncle, his mute wife and the wife’s two brothers, both fascinating and offputting (& dirty) make for an interesting cast of characters, but overall i just wish i was reading the bloody chamber again. 3/5

barchester towers, anthony trollope (chronicles of barsetshire #2) (audio) lol tbh i still don’t know why i am committing to this series about, again, church politics in 19th century rural england, but it’s just so chill & warm & funny (we love gently or not so gently - but always politely - mocking our characters) that i’m enjoying it as a nice little trip where people do some #crazyschemes to gain church positions or fight over whether there should be songs in church or whatever it is people in the 19th century fought about. it’s very relaxing. there also is a lot of love quadrangleyness going on and that’s also fun. trollope has weird ideas about women but like whatever, i for one wish mrs proudie much joy of her position as defacto bishop of barchester, she really girlbossed her way to the top. 3.5/5

semiosis, sue burke (semiosis #1) i love spinning the wheel on the “first contact with X weird alien species” & i guess this time we landed on plants! plant intelligence is interesting and the idea of plant warfare is really cool. i do like the structure, with different generations of human settlers on the planet pax providing a long-term view but this allows the author to skip over a lot of the development of the relationship between the settlers and the plant and locating the plot elsewhere, which i think is ultimately a mistake. i might continue w/ the series tho, depending on library availability. 2.5/5

one by one, ruth ware a bunch of start-up people go on a corporate retreat to a ski chalet in the alps, avalanche warning goes up, one of them disappears, presumably on a black piste, the rest get snowed in & completely cut off when the avalanche hits and then they get picked off *title drop* (altho really not that many of them). nice fluff when i had a miserable cold (not covid) but fails when it tries to go for deeper themes... like an attempt to address classism and entitlement sure... was made. also like what kind of luxury skiing chalet does not have emergency communication devices in case internet/phone lines are down...  i’d have sued just for that. 2/5

fake accounts, lauren oyler the microgenre of ‘alienated intellectual(ish) probably anglophone person has some sort of crisis, goes to berlin about it’ is my ultimate literary weakness - i almost never really like them, they mostly irritate me & yet i can never resist their siren call. this one is p strong on the irritation, altho at least the narrator does not ascribe much meaning to her decision to go to berlin after she a) discovers her boyf is an online conspiracy theorist (probably not sincerely) and b) gets a call that said boyf has died, it’s really just something to do to avoid doing anything else. but other than that it’s so BerlinExpat by the numbers, like she lives in kreuzkölln! put her somewhere else at least! there is one scene that elevates the BerlinExpat-ness of it all (narrator asks expatfriend for advice on visa applications, expatfriend assures her that it’s really easy for americans to get visa, adds “especially now” while literally, as the narrator remarks, gesturing at the falafel she’s eating) other than that, the novel is.... fine. it’s smart, but not really as smart as it thinks it is, which is a problem bc it thinks it’s just sooo incisive. whatever. 2/5

the tenant of wildfell hall, anne bronte this is reductive but: jane eyre: i could fix him // wuthering heights: i could make him worse // wildfell hall: lmao i’m gonna leave his ass anyway i enjoyed the part that is actually narrated by the titular tenant of wildfell hall, helen (which thankfully, i think, is most of it) because the perspective of a woman who runs away from her abusive alcoholic of a husband is genuinely interesting and engaging, while gilbert, the frame story narrator who falls in love with helen, is.... the worst. i mean he’s not the worst bc the abusive husband arthur is there and hard to beat in terms of worseness, but he’s pretty fucking bad. imagine if helen had found out that gilbert attacked her secret brother over a misunderstanding, severely injured him & LEFT HIM TO DIE & then (when dude survived & the misunderstanding got cleared up) apologised like well i guess i didn’t treat you quite right! she’d have to run away from her second husband as well! poor girl. 3/5

[mh-puppet]

10 Games to Help Stay Social While Social Distancing

As a gamer who largely enjoys in-person gaming with friends, social distancing has drastically altered the way I interact with my friends. Our hangouts have gone entirely virtual and we’ve delved more into online gaming as a result. Fortunately a few of the games we routinely play have online modes, but we’ve also discovered other online games that are free to play and browser based, which have become vital to virtual hangouts between people with different tech specs and little desire to make new financial investments in their game library. I made a list of ten of my favorite free to play browser games to help others stay social during this time.

If this list has helped you facilitate your virtual hangouts, if you like the list, or if you have games you would add to help us all stay social while social distancing, I hope you’ll reblog and spread something fun around instead of coronavirus!

Many Player Games

1) Town of Salem - A Mafia style game where loyal townsfolk attempt to rid themselves of mafia, who themselves are trying to eliminate the townsfolk who might stand against them. Renegade characters lurk in the midst to fulfill their own objectives. https://blankmediagames.com/TownOfSalem/

2) Cards and Humanity Online - This is a free, online version of Cards Against Humanity. https://www.airconsole.com/play/card-games/cards-and-humanity

3) Secret Hitler.io - This is a free, online version of the mafia style board game, Secret Hitler. https://secrethitler.io/

4) Agar.io - Jump into an arena of players all attempting to grow their circular avatars to the largest size. How do you grow? By eating the other players and absorbing their mass. The larger you are the slower you move. Small players will need to be crafty to grow while avoiding larger players. Large players may need to divide their mass to trap smaller targets, but beware other large players who may then take advantage of your decreased size. https://agar.io/

5) Gartic.io -  Each round a player is given a word, and must draw that word for others to guess. The player who guesses correctly earns points, and the game continues until someone reaches the specified goal, with that player winning the game. https://gartic.io/

6) Blast Arena - This is very reminiscent of Bomberman games. https://blastarena.io/

2 to 4 Player Games

1) Dominion Online - Technically for 2 to 6 players, though I find Dominion games with more than 4 players unwieldy. This deck building game starts everyone off with the same resources. From there, use your treasures to buy actions, treasures, and victory cards to build the most valuable deck you can. The base game, which is free, will offer plenty of enjoyment. Those who enthusiastically love the game may access the expansions for a price, their friends will also be granted access so long as they are playing together. https://dominion.games/

2) Shadowverse - This is a free to play collectible card game reminiscent of Hearthstone. I personally find it to be superior to Hearthstone in a lot of ways. First, I think it does a better job neutralizing first player advantage. Second, it is easier to advance and build your card collection in Shadowverse than it is in Hearthstone; to date I have not spent any actual money on in-game purchases and have made my way pretty far up the ladder. Third, I find the cards and differences in class mechanics more interesting than I typically did in Hearthstone. This game can be played on mobile or in your browser, and it’s definitely one of my favorites on this list. https://shadowverse.com/

3) Words With Friends - https://www.zynga.com/games/words-with-friends-2/

4) Lichess - This is one of the more highly rated chess clients out there. It doesn’t just let you match up with randoms for chess or to play chess with your friends. It offers areas where you can learn to get better at chess and has advanced functionality that has allowed us to set up chess tournaments among my friends. https://lichess.org/?g=i9qg8c6o

[radramblog]

Go read Animorphs please

Animorphs is a series of books aimed at preteens or something released over the course of the late 90s, finishing up in 2001. It also fucking rules, and it’s a tragedy that most people just know it for the painfully bad CGI on the covers.

Animorphs is almost painfully 90s, with pop culture references that probably wouldn’t land on a modern reader and a hint of that totally radical attitude the decade is now infamous for. I think a lot of the confusion around the series stems from people misinterpreting it as an example of what the series deconstructs- the sort of Saturday morning kids show like Power Rangers where the protagonists beat up the bad guys before going to school and getting caught up in teen drama. The truth is, Animorphs is a war story, with the trauma and brutality associated with that, as the more normal aspects of its characters lives slowly fall away. In some of the later books, the characters do still technically go to school, but their grades are suffering, they’re tired all the time from the guerrilla warfare they partake in after hours, they’re constantly paranoid, and substantially more reclusive than they once were. People die in this series- in fact the opening scene has an important character fucking devoured by the main villain. The main villains, the Yeerks, are a parasitic species of worms that take over people’s brains, slowly infiltrating earth from the ground up, while the “good guy” alien species, the Andalites, are snobby space elf centaur people who would probably rather wipe out the earth themselves than let the Yeerks take it over, it’s fucking bleak!

Fun fact: K.A. Applegate had fairly simple alien designs with the idea that a live-action adaptation of it wouldn’t be too hard, before getting asked to redesign them landing us with the weird as fuck designs we got. Then, of course, when it did get adapted, they couldn’t capture that and it ended up looking like shit.

This is not to say that the series doesn’t have its levity- shenanigans are allowed to ensue, and banter between the 6 Animorphs is pretty enjoyable, but it largely ends up as a stark contrast to the series’s more gripping moments. Ultimately it cannot be that bad, seeing as it is effectively a series for children- a constant reminder of this being that the whole series is in small books with a larger font size- but it’s surprising just how much the author, K.A. Applegate, was able to get away with while still publishing under the Scholastic name.

There are a total of 54 books in the main series, and I have read probably most of them. Unfortunately, of the brutal final act, I’ve only read like 2 of the books, including the last one, but I can confirm that the vast majority are worth the time. With that said, a big chunk of the second half of the series is ghostwritten, and often filler, but a lot of them are still worth the time. Maybe it’s nostalgia speaking, but most of them still hold up in my eyes. Book #26, the Attack, is the last one of the main series before ghostwriters mostly took over (until the last two), and it’s just a good sci-fi story, with the protagonists thrust into a conflict completely unrelated to the main story by the whims of an errant, if largely benevolent, god, being his champions in yet another struggle against his rival. It’s weird and cool, finally has payoff for all the Jake/Cassie teasing the series had been doing, and ends on a touching note that shows that not all hope is lost, which is always a good message.

(I haven’t read this one, but I reallly want to~)

Before I go I’d like to give a brief shout-out to 8 of the 10 books outside the main series- the choose your own adventure books aren’t great- that form the Megamorphs series and the Chronicles. The Megamorphs books are longer, semi-canon adventures featuring multiple perspective characters instead of the usual one, and have pretty wild, TV Special-esque plotlines- the second one, In the Time of Dinosaurs, is pretty self-explanatory, but the third, Elfangor’s Secret, also deals with time travel. The Animorphs end up at fucking D-Day by the end of it, with Tobias (?) killing Hitler but it doesn’t even matter because all the timeline fuckery has made it so he’s just some random tank driver. Jake actually dies, after all the insane shit he lives through, dead to a bullet in the face! It’s a romp. On the other hand, the Chronicles series is essentially backstory for the alien characters, and while I’ve only read two of them, both of them have a lot of thought and heart put into them, establishing a level of tragedy for the characters and species involved that makes what happens to them in the main series even worse overall.

 Ultimately the series might be a little kiddy for an adult reader, but I still would give it a shot. You don’t know what you’ve been missing, and that’s okay. The first book was recently adapted into a graphic novel, and I’m hoping that can spur a renewed interest in the series, because it’s worth it.

[asweetersapphic]

forcing a different friend to rate the infernal devices characters:

(all art is by Cassandra Jean!)

again my alt text is too long, so here’s what he said:

Tessa:

yellow/orange and red makes me think she’s very calm, but has one specific passion that she doesn’t let people fuck with, she doesn’t curse angrily, only like “fuuuck” definitely leadership material (whether it’s rebellious leader or more serious is up to her really), not usually a bitch but there’s like 1 person who really can’t with her whole confidence thing, 8.5/10

Will:

chill boi, some self-esteem issues and only like 1 creative outlet, watches people, likes nature but doesnt usually visit it, nice eyes, doesnt hate anyone, 10/10

Cecily:

dual personality, fire and water. social, relates to water in it’s flowing nature and fire in it’s emotion, likes the color blue, love/hate relat. with nature, only visits when she wants to chill for a bit, 9/10

Jem:

gonna get killed, you think he’s soft but he’s a DOUCHE, anyways chile next, 5/10

Jessamine:

cottagecore, not doing it for the trend, never curses, all good soul vibes, would kill hitler, 11/10

Gabriel:

bad boi vibes, I would sex, likes nature for it’s mechanical aspects, can be fancy but likes to get down and dirty for inventing purposes, 12/10

Gideon:

he’s like his brother when it comes to passion, but is more reserved and nice about it, he likes people sometimes, into writing and journaling, and sketches, 11/10

Sophie:

she’s shy but will speak up ONLY at the last straw, likes hearing the tea on the dl, hates boys! but loves everyone equally except her haters, 8/10

Charlotte:

the villain, but it’s sad. she’s unstable and murderous, secretive, but seems like such a socialite. hates everyone but pretends not to. gg, 9/10

Henry:

sex master 2000, not a mega genius but definitely not stupid. drinks respect women juice and might not be fighting for basic human rights, but would snap out of it and become a better human being 10/10

BONUS:

I asked him about Magnus and Tatiana but Tumblr only allows 10 pics:

Tatiana:

THE REAL VILLAIN, but she’s actually really nice and is peer pressured into it. she likes autumn the most, and her favorite animal is a bear, because of their gentleness. she’s a mega boss. personally, she gets a 10/10, overall I think she’s more of a 8/10 gal (he just described Grace)

Magnus:

sexist, wish he would stop talking. he’s still nice, just doesn’t understand that stereotypes were created to oppress, not to be followed word-for-word. he’s mystical, and more fun then the other lads. he’s the fuck bitches get money of the group. his alignment would be chaotic neutral. he sometimes says boop, for no reason. 10/10

BONUS PART TWO ELECTRIC BOGOLOO:

I tell him how he did:

1. Tessa, 10/10 you nailed her. the author needs to let her say fuck.

2. Will, 7/10, has big boi self esteem issues BUT he’s a very angry and rude boy, also very sarcastic. does have nice eyes tho.

3. Cecily, 9/10 you basically nailed her. I didn’t tell you but all the art comes from this one art book where the characters are drawn with flowers that represent them so that’s why all the drawings are so naturery.

4. Jem, 3/10 he does get (kind of) killed but HES A BABY AND SO NICE AND HELPFUL. best friends with will, literally the uncle iroh to will’s zuko.

5. Jessamine, 5/10, the stereotypical mean girl until she dies and becomes a lot better. BUT she’s a very Proper Lady™️ (takes place in Victorian London) so she would definitely never curse.

6. Gabriel, 7/10 mostly nailed him but he doesn’t do any inventing.

7. Gideon, 9/10, you nailed his personality. shy boi.

8. Sophie, 9/10, pretty good but unfortunately she does marry Gideon so doesn’t fully hate boys. she was a maid for a lot of the story so she’s usually pretty quiet but once she’s on the same level she speaks up more.

9. Charlotte, 0/10, you fucked up a a ron. She’s a babe, very nice but puts her foot down and deals with a lot of sexist shit. nothing would work without her.

10. Henry, 3/10 he do be drinking that respect woman juice but he’s also a fucking genius who invents all sorts of cool shit. good guy and supports Charlotte (his wife). unknown abt his sex life but we do stan.

11. Tatiana, 5/10 bc you just described her daughter.

12. Magnus, 5/10, the second half was right but he drinks plenty of respect women juice. also a bi person of color, we stan him! I could see him saying boop and he is a warlock

[manuscripts-dontburn]

Carrie

Author: Stephen King

First published: 1974

Pages: 171

Rating: ★★★☆☆

How long did it take: 1 day

A good entertainment to cleanse my palette.... Might check out more King books eventually.

The Price Guide to the Occult

Author: Leslye Walton

First published: 2018

Pages: 288

Rating: ★★★☆☆

How long did it take: 3 days

First of all, there should be a MASSIVE trigger warning for self-harm and parental abuse. Second of all, this is one of those books that simply needed more meat and more time. The premise is interesting, the writing beautiful, but all the gore and horror in it would have benefitted greatly from a more complex world. Many key scenes and situations were explained in a hurry and left one unsatisfied. And saying all that, just because a book is centred around a teen girl should not make it a YA. Because this is not.

My Grandmother Sends Her Regards and Apologises

Author: Fredrik Backman

First published: 2013

Pages: 342

Rating: ★★☆☆☆

How long did it take: 4 days

Look, I completely understand why this book is so praised by many people. I could pinpoint the many places in it which probably resonate with others. But for whatever reason, I was bored for most of it. I had to force myself to continue reading and that is never good. This was just not for me.

The Gentleman’s Guide to Getting Lucky

Author: Mackenzi Lee

First published: 2019

Pages: 128

Rating: ★★★★☆

How long did it take: 1 day

This was just friggin stinking cute. Cannot wait for another book in this series.

Medieval Bodies: Life, Death and Art in the Middle Ages

Author: Jack Hartnell

First published: 2019

Pages: 352

Rating: ★★★★☆

How long did it take: 11 days

Very accessible to anyone, with or without a knowledge of medieval times. I enjoyed the way the book was structured according to various body parts, which then were used as a base for a discussion of other topics relevant to life in the Middle Ages. It is not just medicine, but also sexuality, travelling, fashion and other themes. I would have liked the book to be much more lengthy, to be honest, because I simply found it fascinating. My favourite part? Probably the ode to the vagina and the explanation of the penis trees. I am just a lowly human with a dirty mind after all!

The Raven Boys

Author: Maggie Stiefvater

First published: 2012

Pages: 409

Rating: ★★★★☆

How long did it take: 5 days

I had so much fun reading this! It was like The Secret History by Donna Tart, except less on crack and with magic. What I appreciated were the were very real conflicts dealing with social class, the clear individuality of each character, the fact that going to class and striving for good marks is actually a significant factor for these kids and also a twist I did not see coming. Intrigued. Will definitely read the rest of the series.

The Gloaming

Author: Kirsty Logan

First published: 2018

Pages: 320

Rating: ★★★☆☆

How long did it take: 8 days

First of all, I have to say that the cover and Kirsty´s previous books made me expect something completely else than I was given. So here goes for everybody else: this is NOT a book about mermaids and it is NOT in any way related to The Gracekeepers. It is a story about FAMILY and the weight of OBLIGATION in contrast to personal WANTS as well as searching for the meaning of HOME. Sprinkled with just a tiny magical element. The writing is gorgeous and the atmosphere utterly melancholy. So why didn't I love it more? Partly because of my misplaced expectations, but that I could probably overlook. However, this story is so slow that even halfway through the book I still had a feeling it hasn't started yet. It also took a little while to get used to the format in which the timelines skip here and there and everywhere. In the end, it all does click together and it did leave me thinking about the book though. To steal the very last line: perhaps that's all we can ask.

Every Heart a Doorway

Author: Seanan McGuire

First published: 2016

Pages: 168

Rating: ★★★☆☆

How long did it take: 1 day

I truly appreciate the idea as well as inclusivity of this book, at the same time I have to say that if anything, I felt it was unfinished. It felt like a first or second draft, just capturing the basic skeleton (pun intended) of the story before the author would return it and actually put meat on it (he he he). Why should I care for characters I know nothing about and met them yesterday? The language was felt adequate yet fairly unimpressive. And in what reality people have such a lacklustre reaction to brutal murder? This book feels like an opportunity not taken and it is a real pity. Because the premise and even the plot had so much potential.

Zinky Boys: Soviet Voices from the Afghanistan War

Author: Svetlana Alexievich

First published: 1989

Pages: 224

Rating: ★★★★★

How long did it take: 5 days

This was an absolutely brutal read. A perfect gallery of human voices and the differences of their experience of the same events. Just really brutal.

Mermaid Moon

Author: Susann Cokal

First published: 2020

Pages: 496

Rating: ★★☆☆☆

How long did it take: 3 days

I am SO disappointed but I guess it serves me right since this one was a complete cover buy. Unfortunately, the gorgeousness of the book (including UNDER the cover) is not matched by the content. I had expected a melancholy fairytale since after all this is supposed to be a sort of retelling of the Little Mermaid. And the premise itself sounded promising too. A young mermaid comes on land to find her long lost human mother, but unexpected happenings surrounding our main protagonist inspires some pretty strong feelings in a humble and religious community. Sadly the story is told in a way which makes me wonder for whom it was intended. Most of the book reads like the most boring and basic teenage romance (including instalove and a love triangle), but then there are really unnecessary descriptions of interspecies mating techniques. The structure of the story is very sloppy. I feel the 2 stars are more than generous.

Hitler's Forgotten Children: The Shocking True Story of the Nazi Kidnapping Conspiracy

Author: Ingrid Von Oelhafen

First published: 2015

Pages: 256

Rating: ★★★☆☆

How long did it take: 3 days

I was misled by the title of the book. I went into it expecting a study of Lebensborn (which was not a completely unknown thing to me) which would explore the reasons of its birth (pun not intended), people behind it, more information on the people who ran it, exploration of the routine and of course personal stories of its children. In a concise but rather short and watered-down way, I got all of those, however, it did not offer me any real depth of information. So what this book actually is? It is a personal memoir of a lady who had battled all of her life with the question of identity and origins and found in her later years that she was actually a Lebensborn baby. We get to know her difficulties over searching for information and eventually finding her origins. On one hand, the story is interesting and the writing very accessible, on the other hand, I found it somewhat unengaging and, as previously noted, not too informative for someone like me, who already possesses some knowledge of the matter, both because I have studied history and because the Nazis stealing children has always been a big topic in my country, Czechoslovakia back then since it happened here too. .

The Home For Unwanted Girls

Author: Joanna Goodman

First published: 2018

Pages: 364

Rating: ★★★★☆

How long did it take: 3 days

A touching tale about complicated family matters and relationships in the context of 1950s Canada. I really enjoyed it and it earns bonus points for teaching me something new in terms of history. Definitely would recommend if you like books like Before We Were Yours.

The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde and Other Stories

Author: Robert Louis Stevenson

First published: 1886

Pages: 256

Rating: ★★★★☆

How long did it take: 9 days

I was surprised at how much I enjoyed this collection of short stories. True, I did not much care about one and felt a bit disappointed by another (The Suicide Club which had a phenomenal premise but fell short on excitement or satisfying finish), but overall I was quite intrigued and amused.

The Prince and the Dressmaker

Author: Jen Wang

First published: 2018

Pages: 277

Rating: ★★★★☆

How long did it take: 1 day

Oh my gosh this was SO PURE and THAT FINALE actually had me in stitches!!!!