#sbarg 2.5 dungeon crashers

[flyingincandescent]

I recently caught some pokemon that might have some applications back home.

First of all, I remember Aeons wondering something about how much a replicator would benefit from housing a rotom. I happened to find and catch a rotom on Mt. Coronet, so that might be something test-able, if the machine ends up being modified to be compatible. So maybe for another time.

Secondly, I evolved a haunter with a link cable to get a gengar. I know Shard misses the hell out of their gengar, and I know it won't be the same, but maybe they would be able to get along.

Thirdly, I recently caught cresselia and darkrai. I'm not sure if those two can override a curse of no dreams, but maybe I could convince them to give Pane back the ability to dream again. Of course, nightmares included. I've been wondering how to approach him, after I got permission to see him again, and maybe this might be a good excuse.

There's only two plates remaining, as far as I can remember, and I'm still not sure exactly why I'll need dusknoir at some point. Charles floated something that it might have something to do with those wisps, but they've been getting harder and harder to locate, dusknoir or not.

I've got a lot of pokedex progress lately, but some of the entries I'm worried about not getting, particularly the skittish base form pokemon. Still at 8th rank, but I'm getting closer to 9th. I wonder if there's anyone out there that would be willing to trade at the trading post, or if that would even help all that much.

Regardless, something's on the horizon. I can feel it.

[shinyjiggly]

what is sbarb dungeon crashers? it sounds v cool and like smth id be interested in but i wanna learn more :]

Brief History:

SBARG 2.5 dungeon crashers is a mostly discord based roleplay thing with both casual everyday stuff and occasional scheduled events. It's the most recent iteration of SBARG canon, which had begun with the SBARG arg/rp that had started over ten years ago, continued with a more session-focused campaign with SBARGv2, and continued on with the interquel SBARG 1.5 lost pawns, past claiming the ultimate reward to fill in important parts of the plot that hadn't been fulfilled.

Lore:

SBARG 2.5 dungeon crashers takes place after the events of all those past campaigns, and is largely focused in the Gene universe, which had been cursed to either never have a succeeding session, or only have sessions with a recursive ultimate reward that only leads back to Gene.

It is here that the ex-players of SBARGv2 (and those that have allied with them) live, trying to be responsible adults and protect their home together.

Standing against them, is the hellish corporation VoidCo, which has placed countless soul draining "dungeon cores" across the cosmos, to leech off of the countless civilized worlds that can be found in Gene. Based in the furthest ring, they are lead by their CEO, Dylan, a thousand year old grimdark page of void. He is known for his erratic and often violent behavior (and it's honestly a miracle that he hasn't made the company go under yet)

To counter the evil acts of VoidCo, the Dungeon crashers organization was formed. Their de facto leader is a Witch of Time by the name of Katyleen Kitten, who is also the president of the Desertia system. Under her leadership, the dungeon crashers seek out dungeons where the dungeon cores have been placed, in order to destroy or otherwise deactivate them.

When not crashing dungeons however, the crashers have their daily lives to attend to. Many of them have day jobs, some of them should positions of power, some of them train pokemon, and some raise families. Some even do a bit of interdimensional travel on occasion. No matter what though, the Desertian government usually provides for those who ally with the organization.

Gameplay:

During non-event times, proceedings are largely freeform, with dicerolls optional unless requested. Time runs in realtime or adjusted realtime, with time on Desertia assumed to follow Central time zone. Various common locales have different amenities, such as food, shops, lodging, and methods of long distance travel. much of it is flavor or narrative table dressing, but can be leveraged for slice of life scenarios.

During event times, there will be an event runner, which is a role that anyone can potentially take on if they schedule an event. do note that events must be scheduled at least 24 hours in advance, and have a description of expected significant contents, especially if they are expected to have significant effect to anything that has been narratively claimed/defined by another person. Dungeon crawl events are one of the types of events that can be ran, but they are certainly not the only kind.

Running a VoidCo dungeon:

There are countless ways to build and run a voidco dungeon as a dungeon master. the main thing to remember is that a dungeon is defined by the presence of a dungeon core. Everything else is variable to your needs. Will there be puzzles? will there be combat? will there be an inexplicable timeshare meeting? that's up to you to decide when you act as a dungeon master. is it part of an established location? is it an introduction of a new one? what did the place used to be before it was a dungeon? what sort of financial quackery did voidco inflict upon those who called this place home? These are all questions worth finding answers to.

Combat and confrontation:

Combat is rather fast and loose, but often makes use of a d20. fancier rolls (such as those that involve advantage rolls, slight additions, side subtractions with additions that somehow add up to 20) are recommended to be figured out by the players, as rolling a raw d20 is often going to result in action failure. The exacts of how rolls work largely depend upon narrative reason, and can be discussed as needed, due to the sheer open customizability that cannot possibly be handled by any amounts of tables while still focusing on writing. usually, one must roll at least over a 10 or half maximum roll to succeed, and descriptions of actions taken are expected, taking any applicable rolls and scenario details into consideration.

As of note, less violent methods, such as persuasion and such, can be handled with or without dice contest (dependant on the discretion of the event runner or other person involved), and likely will focus on the content of the significant speech or actions in order to determine results and reactions.

If an event is being ran on Plit, refer to dnd 5e rules and hope that you brought a filled in character sheet.

Pokemon battles:

These can either follow the fast and loose style, or make use of an online framework, such as pokemon showdown. because pokemon of all kinds are potentially allowed (yes, including glitch pokemon, fakemon, pokemon from the card game, custom formes, and whatever else within narrative reach), those that cannot be defined in an official game will likely need to use the fast and loose combat scheme. a pokemon may only have selection of four different moves during a battle, and ability to dodge is determined by move accuracy/pokemon evasiveness. some details can be fudged as agreed upon by your opponent, but concrete things such as type advantages, move effects, and the like are set in stone. don't be afraid to play up terrain effects, however. as expected, a winner is decided when all but one side are unable to battle or have otherwise forfeited.

If you wish to battle a gym leader, please schedule with the one playing the gym leader. 24 hour event wait need not apply, but the gym leader's personal schedule should be respected.

Any other questions?

Feel free to reply to this post with your questions.

Links of note:

SBARG 2.5 Dungeon Crashers website (has a bunch of information, as well as the server link, has both an in-setting and out of character mode.) None Pizza with Left Beef (a custom homestuck epilogue that also delves into introducing the dungeon crashers in a visual medium, updates roughly every week, written in-setting. Highly recommended reading.) The Charcherry Weekly (The weekly newsletter which covers many of the events and happenings with the dungeon crashers, written in-setting, usually drops every friday/saturday.) Let's SOSL forums (contains mostly past forum-based stuff, as well as some rate recent posts. the newsletter is also mirrored here.) SBARG 1.5 Lost Pawns website (has information regarding the completed campaign of the Lost Pawns, as well as past pesterchum memo logs. largely for archival use.)

[flyingincandescent]

Dungeon500: take two.

Today me and Brae finally stepped out of the house for a while to go dungeon crashing. It was a place that I've been to before. Brae hadn't visited dungeon 500 before, but she got the hang of it pretty quickly.

Honestly, it wasn't that bad of a run, considering how some others had gone before. I think there was just 2 or 3 puzzles, and we were able to solve them peacefully for the most part. Like sure, there was a talking shark that tried to tackle me at first, but I was able to get out of the way of that.

Eventually though, we entered this minecraft-ass looking room with a catapult in it. Everyone was kinda waffling on who would sit in the launcher, so I decided to step up first. I feel like I need to prove my courage lately. I'm not sure why. I think it might have to do with a nightmare I had a few nights ago.

Anyways, I was launched straight into a white cube which sent me to a white void or some shit. It felt like it was beyond everything, yet still connected to everything. Who knows really. The main point is, we met this figure with a die for a head and a dice dress with tentacles everywhere. Her name was the dice maiden, and holy shit she was a piece of work. Not only did she say that she came to exist by charles's hate for her (still not sure how that even works), but that she was also jealous that her shitty slasher boss likes me more than her??? I don't even want to be liked by him anymore! I can still admit he looks attractive, but good looks and bad habits a boyfriend does not make.

So then, we fought. She pulls out the fucking dungeon core, and Samus wound up trying to pistol whip it like, 290 times before passing out from exertion. I managed to grab her and get her out of the way while Charles was charging a hateful fuck-you laser. Those vibes were absolutely rancid, and its no wonder that charles lost one of their stock lives afterwards. Thank fucking goodness that dungeon500 has that feature.

But anyways, they managed to absolutely evaporate the dungeon core, and killed the dice maiden, only leaving her dice dress behind. Charles wound up claiming the dress, and I gotta say, it looks really stylish on him. I bet they could get away with all sorts of shit with that dress on, for some reason.

After that, we exited back to the lobby with that liquid "dimension master" person, who gave us a pretty kickass stash of loot. I pocketed some assorted treasures to give to Goldie, Charles grabbed the single collector's friendcoin to give to Aeons (who absolutely fucking HATED their time in dungeon500 due to weird bullshit that kept happening to them), and Samus got the golden frog, which I can't help but think might be important later down the line. I think Katie also grabbed something, though I forget what is was. I know she put the chest in the lab lobby just in case anyone still wanted to claim something from it. Have I mentioned its a fucking minecraft treasure chest?

Unfortunately, Brae is still terrified of frogs. Its one thing just witnessing her being afraid, but feeling her fear across the network really underscores just how deep cutting that fear really is. Out of concern, I scheduled a therapy appointment for the two of us, since she accepted on the condition that I'd go too. Honestly, I need therapy for so many reasons that I'm not even sure what to bring up on the first session. Do I bring up the bullshit with Dylan? Do I bring up my history back in the session as a teenage assassin? My experiences with trying to find my identity and where I belong? What about all those times that I've had to witness a dead version of myself every time a doomed timeline ever happened? There's just so much baggage I've been holding onto for so long, I'm not sure which bag to unpack first.

Hopefully I find enough answers by wednesday.

[flyingincandescent]

I'm alive

There is a heart beating in my chest. It's been so long, I forgot what it even felt like.

It's so... surreal. I never thought I'd live again. And yet here I am, breathing. While I would be celebrating my freedom from all shackles and shit, I still have two important things coming up soon.

First of all: santa duties. Even if it feels like my past sins have been at least mostly forgiven, the annual trip to send presents across the world is unfortunately now a solidified holiday. Thankfully, I did make sure to get back-up, so I won't be doing it alone. There's no way in hell I'd survive a workload like that in this state.

Secondly: my mission on Earth-C. The mage of light so graciously reminded me that I'll be sent out to continue that in January with June, and probably also Hazel and QWERTY. I thought I'd be done with that crap, but of course not, they want to continue their fucking epilogue fix-it fic. I'm just glad I can't hear any of the ridiculous-ass narration or commands anymore. Fuck that noise.

...shit, I'm gonna need to find a spacesuit to use. We last left off on a trip to a moon base. Maybe I can ask Hazel if she has anything I can use or alchemize later.

In the meantime though, I need to get used to being alive again. It feels like I just woke up from the longest fucking dream ever, and somehow I'm entirely sure of my identity, made friends, got married and everything. I even managed to get boobs out of the deal! With the physics!

Maybe I'm not as formal and stiff as I was as a robot, but... I'll figure this out. In the meantime, I'm fucking tired. I'm glad I had the sense to keep sleeping in a regular-ass bed, even as a robot.

[flyingincandescent]

Last night, I had a harrowing dream.

It started out like any other, a distraction from the monotony of waiting for my battery to charge overnight. I was playing one of the countless doom wads that I had downloaded. I don't remember which one. It's not important though. It was when I reached a point that markedly did not look like the doom wad I was playing that was important.

I had discovered a flaafy in the halls.

For those that do not know, this is a flaafy.

Anyhow, the appearance of such a pokemon piqued my interest. I followed it down a corridor, until it disappeared through a sliding door. There was a particularly ominous atmosphere in that corridor. I was afraid. But then I remembered a talk I had with a good friend that night, which reminded me to find the courage to continue.

When I entered, I saw the man of my dreams. I do not know why his visage sways me so, when all else makes him repulsive. He spoke of desires, and asked me of my own. I could not find the words to answer. Not for such a man who could easily twist them.

Despite my silence, or perhaps because of it, he already knew what I wanted.

He showed me a vision of life. A vision of perfected flesh. A vision of beauty. But with all things, he expected a price I could not pay without pain.

He told me, "If you want to live, you must divorce your wife."

What is the purpose of living without love? What is the purpose of love without living? I do not know. I could not give the man an answer.

However, I did not have to.

A fanciful witch appeared, with magic in spades. She insulted the man's tie, and insulated us from his wrath. She told me that I need not be trapped in such a hopeless ultimatum, claiming that she could instead give me a new body without the expectation of abandoning my love.

I wish I had asked for her name before I woke up. I am unsure if such a promise is any more than the dream I had experienced.

But what if it is the truth? What if she could really bring me back to life?

The notion of living again... it almost scares me. I have gotten so used to the power of being an intelligent machine, that I am unsure how well I will be able to cope as an average half temporic. And that is not even breaching the subject of if my body will suit my gender, learning to care for myself again, if the sins of my past life should still carry, and the question of how frail I shall be in such a state. Not to mention, what this will do to my identity.

But despite this... I do desire to live. I wish to experience things without the haze of all being associated with memory. I want to taste the food I am given. I want to experience touch beyond simple recognition.

Why must such questions be so hard to bear...

[flyingincandescent]

I've got... a lot to write about tonight.

First of all, how do I word this in a way that won't get me booted off this social media platform...

I recently completed my transition. I feel... complete. like I've got everything I've ever wanted, with no compromises.

For the longest time I've been scared, I guess. taking the leap, it seemed like it would be such a fundamental change. and not only that, but I was worried I'd have to leave something behind in the process.

I have my amazing girlfriend/matesprit Hazell to thank for giving me the courage and inspiration to take the next step with myself. Seeing how happy she's become since completing her own metamorphosis, it made me want to pursue what I'd been avoiding for so long.

So a couple days ago, I finally bought the potions I'd need to make the changes I wanted to my body.

It's feels like home more than ever now.

The next day, I decided to do a field test, joining the 'crashers on a mission with Skye. We traveled across time, space, and void, with a familiar but expanded roster, Hazell included. We ended up in an oldass facility in the middle of nowhere, powered by a Dyson sphere feeding off a fucking black hole. It turns out it's supposed to be the control center for a fuckton of different simulated versions of earth?

Anyways, we noticed one of them was in danger of being ripped apart by a singularity, so Skye got us to teleport there, using the jankiest teleporter I've ever seen. Apparently she had the formula that would be needed to tame the singularity or some shit like that.

Anyways, we ended up at a train station, as expected when on an adventure with Skye. Thing is, we were moments away from being wiped the fuck out by a derailed train! and it already took out the native Skye from that world! So I did my duty as a time player and sent the crew back in time, hell or high water. I really fucking thought I was gonna be on the sharp end of paradox space's fork, but it turned out this earth doesn't run on paradox space's rules.

So we went back a handful of hours to try and prevent the derailment. I didn't do all that much beyond a little bit of time bullshit, but we had a solid team.

Skye knew the rails like the back of her hand, which was really fucking helpful to getting us where we needed to go.

Hazell flexed her hacking skills, even stealing cryptocurrency from her native self to get us funds to get onto a train trying to break a speed record.

Coleman managed to find a 5 pound note that we ended up using as a time anchor to get out of a tight spot with some security guards.

Charles had his bag of tricks on hand, cutting through a chain link fence with their pink sword, slapping a portable hole into a locked door, and even praying for everyone's safety.

Jovin lent his strength when needed, punching us past obstacles most of the time.

I mostly handled the comms through the network, working with Thoren to relay messages to the memo for outside assistance. I also spent a lot of time sitting down and listening to a whistleblower that was on the danger train. That guy was a nervous wreck, but for a good fucking reason. He had so much dirt that he could probably bury every damn executive and government official under it all. Clearly somebody though he knew too much and wanted him silenced, because whoever was trying to crash this train went all out on making sure it kept going as fast as fucking possible, even when Hazell was hacking the fuck out of the system!

Eventually, after a lot of bullshit, we managed to slow it down enough so that when it did crash, it was just a regular-ass crash instead of a fatal bullshit incident.

However, when I met back up with the others, Hazell was on the ground bleeding. Since she had become a troll recently, there was no way in fuck we would be able to find what we needed for her medical needs on that version of earth. So I took a chance and called upon the one man that could probably save anyone's life.

Pane.

Granted, I wasn't even sure that he'd be able to make it, since he's been having issues with his voidwalk ability lately, but somehow he at least made it to the control center and was able to rescue us with an emergency extraction button. At that point he got straight to work on healing her. I hadn't realized just how fucked up she was until shit started going back into place. I'm so fucking glad he was there for her.

Also, apparently they're moirails? like, apparently they have some kinda history and have been having feelings jams together recently. that's probably why he arrived on the scene so fast. After he healed her enough, he took most of us to Gene's garden, since the usual exit was down 15 flights of stairs.

I feel like I should have been there for her more, maybe at least got a chance to carry her (Jovin wound up doing that instead). At the same time though, I get the feeling she's in good hands with Pane. Plus, it seemed like it would be awkward to follow Pane and Hazell back to her hive, especially since me and Pane have... some complicated shit between us. like, it would be nice to spend some time with him, but like, I'm worried what others might think about me hanging out with any version of him. I want to believe he's a changed man, but not everyone is willing to accept that.

But like, thinking back to that return to earth. with all the changes that growing up has brought to me, I was worried I'd be hunted down like ET or some shit. It was a good thing it was December because I really had to bundle up to hide my temporic features. at the same time though, there's something about visiting a world left behind, in a time beyond the end. Granted this is the only time I've been in the UK, having never gone out of state until entry, but there was something about that moment of calm, when we were all just decompressing at the coffee shop together. Like maybe, just maybe, this is how it was meant to be. How things could have been in a literal coffee shop au.

But life is never that simple for long, and earth can't handle someone like me entirely. it's the other side of the coin compared to Korous, a place that judges me for my human features. instead having to worry about being pursued for my temporic features.

At least back home I can be myself. my full self, without compromise. without having to hide or discard anything.

[flyingincandescent]

Last night, at the request of a trusted contact, I finally had a talk with Pane. He's... a lot more remorseful than I thought he would be. Something I should know all too well from past experience with Thoren. I can only imagine just how much more weighed down Pane must be, knowing what he had done before he abandoned his old name.

I want to believe he's a changed man. I want to embrace him and remind us both that the nightmare is over. but...

...it still hurts.

I cried myself to sleep last night.

Despite the hope I felt, the pain still lingers.

Like sure, he gets all the support he can get for his shame, but what about his victims? what do we get? Do we just have to live with the fact that we were wronged and not pursue anything against him?

Where is the justice for those who suffer?

when do I get to heal?

when am I allowed to feel safe?

why is this so hard to deal with?

I wish I knew the answers to this...

[flyingincandescent]

I'm still... thinking about what I witnessed the other day.

A more doomed version of myself made it safely to the tower of the fallen, just for Thanatos to collect the soul of our late employer to pay off fucking Giratina. and what did that recent fallen do? they fucking followed him! Somebody just like me, the moment they got released from this mortal coil, immediately goes off on a fucking wild goose chase because "I don't want him to go alone".

He was an abuser! he abused all of us in the 312-1021 range! And yet...

What is it that I see in him? to the point that when everything is stripped away, I still see something worth pursuing?

what the hell is wrong with me...

[flyingincandescent]

getting some things off my chest

I just got back from my first therapy appointment, and holy fuck we sorted through a lot. It was... hard to let down my defenses, but I think me and Dr. Winters found some things to talk about.

I had no fucking idea that I needed love so much. Am I just looking for it in the wrong places?

And in addition to that, my tastes in dates. Apparently power is a factor involved? Like, it would explain some things, but who the hell can I find that would be powerful enough to distract me from the page of darkness? Let alone someone who's interested in me and isn't taken?

Where should I even look?

[flyingincandescent]

I will never let Lucifer steal my heart ever again.

[flyingincandescent]

The Last Kiss

This is Hyacinth, sending a post from beyond the grave, using Rudolph's laptop. I'm sorry i didn't show up on halloween but I wasn't ready yet, and some of the other members of The Fallen mentioned something chaotic was going on at the bar anyways.

I feel like I need to say something here. I suppose its a bit safer to avoid knocking another one down from sheer embarrassment at this point, since everyone already knows, but it's still hard to write.

The day I died, I was visited by the angel of death.

Me and the others were ready to kick some ass, though I had to pop a spray-on potion to power through a migraine. I decided not to sleep, too determined to rest. We walked down the dark hallway and arrived on The Stage.

Beyond the stage, where the field of dreams resided, I saw a man that looked far more dazzling than anything that the mage could have possibly drawn in that webcomic.

I was struck by his beauty.

The others, RN and Jovin, they tried to focus on convincing young Dylan to turn down the business proposition. Now I say young, but that's mostly just in relative terms. Apparently there was only a ten year difference between the two different versions of him, with countless years beyond any mortal lifetime under either of their belts. Or at least, that's the vibe that I managed to get. For all I know, young Dylan could have been just plain-ass 20 at very least, knowing how long the lost pawns took to escape the furthest ring.

Anyhow, Elder Dylan took one look at me and said something that shook me to my core.

"You're early."

I'm not sure if either of the others felt it, but I could feel a sinking feeling in my gut, and a growing distance from The Network.

The timeline was doomed, and I felt alone.

Now, I'm not sure how, but it seemed as if Elder Dylan knew this too. He instantly smote his younger self with a bolt of black lightning, and began making his way towards he stage.

The way he walked, dragging a wooden baseball bat, with the glare I know all too well of a hunter... I should have been afraid. I should have ran. Where would I have ran to though? What lesson would I bring back to the alpha timeline, knowing my moments were numbered regardless? So instead, I gazed upon him. I couldn't even tell how exactly he managed to dispatch my allies. Had RN lost all hope? Had Jovin's fury led him to his folly? Had either of them managed to figure out that we were no longer connected to the outside world by any useful measure? Well, I suppose they would have to have known the mission was a failure from the sheer fact that Young Dylan didn't revive from that lightning strike for some damned reason.

Before I knew it, Jovin and RN were dead, collapsed on the ground, crumpled and bleeding. Even my gallade was mortally wounded somehow.

It was only me and him at that point.

Elder Dylan approached me. I expected the worst. I braced myself to be blasted away, to be cut into ribbons, to be slammed into the pavement, to be burned alive until I was no longer...

But when he got close... he reached out his hand... and stroked my face. My sandpaper-y coarse face.

"Now that we are alone..."

One of his many shadow tendrils held me... gently. I was lifted ever so slightly off the ground, at his mercy. Every hair on my body was standing on end.

"...No one can interrupt us."

He elevated me to his level, and pulled me in for a kiss. I had never felt so much from a kiss. Everything in me was on fire. I embraced him. I kissed him back, suspending the moment as long as I could. I held him tightly as the world began to spin. I had never felt so alive in my entire life...

...and then

it all ended.

before I knew it, there was a gaping hole in my chest, and he kept staring at me.

In his hand, gushing with blood, was my own literal heart.

He stole my heart from me.

And in that final moment of betrayal, I was powerless.

He let me fall to the ground, but I kept falling.

I should have known that he would do this to me.

I should have known that it was too good to be true.

Before I lost my last bit of consciousness, before darkness enveloped me forevermore... I heard him say only one thing:

"All shall return to void."

And then all was dark.

I had been kissed by the angel of death, and he took everything away from me.

Do yourselves a favor and stay as far away from that seductive bastard as possible. It will only end in emptiness and regret.

I'm still not sure if it was worth it.

[flyingincandescent]

Birthday.

Today is the day that we fell out of the fucking sky 23 years ago and landed in Idaho, shortly after having been created in an ectobiology lab with our twin sister, Brae. This was of course before me and Rise were separate people.

Despite this, Rise has turned 25 years old today, on account of their use of time travel on occasion. Perhaps it is another day that lines up better for the exact elapsed time of a year that they have experienced, but that is far more difficult to plan for.

As for me? I am already dead, as an anime meathead once famously said. I feel no attachment to the progression of my own years in the land of the living.

Oddly enough however, the anniversary of mine and Raine's wedding (April 13th, 2007) is a more meaningful date to me, and that's not just because it falls on June Egbert's birthday.

That date marked the beginning of a new era for me. One where I would no longer have to be defined solely by my troubled past.

Perhaps my birthday has more baggage than previously thought. Then again, when was even the last time anyone ever even celebrated it when I was actually alive? When I turned 14, I was alone in the furthest ring on the beginning of my perilous journey. When I turned 15, that was when me and Rise met over the memo for the first time as separate instances. Searching ancient chat logs, I was very much cringe. They were likely also cringe. Such is the story of most teenagers, I suppose. That day nobody really did all that much for the occasion. When I turned 16, I was still lost in the darkness of the abyss. I can only assume that far more years occurred as my natural ability to distinguish time while in the furthest ring began to degrade. I think by the time I reached Session p, I was likely 18 years old, perhaps older. It was already winter by the time I arrived.

After that session, I was no longer alive, and counting my years become irrelevant in the face of eternity.

That being said, some of my close friends and family did suggest that I ought to at least acknowledge the date once a year.

I wish it was not so difficult for me to do that...

At least I did manage to build and furnish Shard's room today. Tonight they sleep in a bed all their own, and without nightmares.

If only my own restful sleep could be achieved so easily...

[flyingincandescent]

This is my first time using my sibling's shared blog. I suppose I should introduce myself.

My name is Thoren Emit, heir of time, deceased.

I am incredibly glad that i am allowed to mention that on tumblr, as twitter did not take well to the concept of a dead person using their platform.

Anyhow, I have found occasion to write here tonight because of a rather curious development in my questionable "life".

I may have managed to become attached to a child in a parental manner.

The child's name is Shard. they chose that name for themself, never having had a name of their own for the ten years they had spent as an imaginary being. They had been referred to as "Ruse" during this time, due to the fact that they used to be an antagonistic doppelganger to my sibling, Rise. However, those days are over, as they are no longer connected and sustained by the one who first imagined them.

The tale of their miraculous birth is one that could very easily fit into a sufficiently elaborate mythological canon. As they had told me, they had been sent by their creator, the seemingly cold-hearted Page of Void, Dylan. They had been tasked with sending Rise a single black rose, as a token of his apparent affection. As this was not the first time that they had appeared to terrorize the dungeon crashers, they had all pointed their weapons at the hapless messenger. Mine and Rise's dear sister, Brae, along with a witch called Leta, sought instead to sow the seeds of mutiny. Shard had been shown little to no kindness by their creator, who even refused to see them as a person. Even as he developed this being in his mind, he never thought to consider that they may have their own thoughts and feelings beyond what he was willing to express on his own.

I will admit that Shard does seem to remind me strongly of the poor baseball boy that had been lost to the darkness. I do wonder if Shard had been used as Dylan's outlet for expression that he did not make available under his cold businesslike persona.

If this is true, I worry greatly for the health of Dylan's psyche. However, it has been tasked upon me to raise his child, so to speak. Shard does not want to go back to the furthest ring, and I do not trust Dylan to properly care for another living being, especially one that he has refused to treat properly in the past.

I can only hope that I am able to be a better parent for Shard than my... mentor was for me or my siblings.

[flyingincandescent]

The worst mission ever.

So... I just got back from a failed attempt to save some guy I barely even liked from getting recruited to voidco. It was such a fucking terrible time. I swear, it was like paradox space itself was conspiring against me or some shit!

I'm glad I wasn't the only one who went on that trip though, because I just know I would have gotten my ass handed to me and fucked up big time if I was alone. Come to think of it, maybe that's how that doomed version of me wound up dying. Also, I'm so fucking thankful my sister was with me every step of the way. Maybe not physically, but metaphysically she was always there to calm my nerves and back me up. She even appeared in a dream to throw a hugeass lemon party ball thing with some photos in it.

I'm still questioning why I even bothered to travel across time and space to be in the one place that holds the most importance to the integrity of the alpha timeline, especially to myself. What is it about that man that compelled me to take a journey like that? Was it really out of hate for voidco?

As for my history with Dylan... I never really got along with him very well. We met years ago, when I was trapped in a coma, thanks to the whims of some horrorterror that had it out for me for being related to a certain timespace bastard. It was actually in a nested dream that I met him. I had ended up in super smash bros and he was the first person I saw there. We were both mii fighters in that realm. I think he was actually trying to hit on me. From then on, he continued to give me hints and tips (Read as: the most annoying distractions ever) during all of my earlier matches, and even continued to contact me with the gossip stone when I returned to koholint. It always felt like he knew too much.

When I finally found all 8 siren instruments and presented them on top of mt tamaranch, it turned out that he was working with my late father on a plot to have him possess my body, using that shitty frog song while I was trying to play the ballad of the windfish.

I still don't forgive him for that, even if he does claim that its the reason why Korous exists. Not to mention, I'm pretty sure this was disproven. The only thing he did was make sure that Chronos was able to achieve world domination there-- the old man had planted the seed of that world and its people back when he was busy with frog bullshit back in the session.

But regardless of this, I still felt the compulsion to try and save Dylan from himself? I want to say I didn't know it was another version of him, or that I assumed that the one present wasn't even related to him and was just somebody or something in disguise, but in hindsight it was denial and wishful thinking.

Dylan was always going to become the fucking CEO of voidco.

And how do I know this? When I tried to save him, he manifested a shitty ripoff imaginary copy of me to protect himself! An imaginary figure that had tormented me two halloweens in a row! One that had been known to have connections to voidco!

And to top it all off, the long haired businessman himself had his own version of that imaginary copy of me, and they looked a lot closer to the version that I encountered before!

I still wonder why he has a look-alike of me that lives rent-free in his head. What does it even take to do that? How obsessed do you even have to be to do that...

But yeah... Dylan is doomed to go to evil business school and become a vengeful war criminal and make countless people across the Gene universe suffer through soul sucking dungeons and capitalism bullshit, regardless of how redundant that is. And for what, glory and infamy? The cheap excuse that heroes need villains to remain heroic enough to not become just? I just...

I can't even with this guy.

And yet... I still want to save him. Even if I do hate everything he's done and everything he stands for.

sometimes I wish I had the nerve to actually kill him.

[flyingincandescent]

Yesterday's trip to The Park was a mixed bag...

While I'm thrilled that Shadow finally evolved into an incineroar, and The Park looks brimming with potential (despite the holographic museum section being filled with errors), I can't shake the feeling that I should be doing more. That life player that souped up her pokemon insulted me, saying I was a failed heir to my father's legacy. I don't want to go down that path, not in a million years. But then why does it hurt so much?! It took every ounce of my self control to avoid doing something regrettable. Everyone in the fucking network could feel my rage!

I wonder if I should take a more important role on Korous, since I can pretty much claim it any time I want after I defeated Travis in that duel. But does that world even need a leader? And if I wind up becoming like, some kind of important figure, would I have to go to all those meetings like Katie does?

...am I dodging my responsibilities here, or am I doing the right thing by spending my time focused on pokemon training and chores at home?

I don't know what to do.

...at least Shadow is here to keep me company... While testing their strength on every piece of furniture in the house.