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hier--soir · 1 year ago

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take your medicine

pre-outbreak joel miller x f!reader

rating: explicit, 18+ minors dni summary: *tv sales advert voice* so you've been finding it hard to reach orgasm? lucky for you, our best-selling item "hunky boyfriend joel" is on sale at half price. shipping is free, and he is very determined to help you achieve your goals! call the number on your screen to buy now! OR your medication makes it difficult to orgasm so joel (and your vibrator) help make it happen. warnings/tags: set in the early 2000s aka early thirties joel my lover boyyyy, boyfriend joel, depression [nothing dark or sad], anti-depressants, brief discussion of food/eating, cigarette smoking [f], soft!supportive!joel, mentions of masturbation [f], unprotected piv sex, use of a sex toy, ride 'em cowgirl (1939) dir. samuel diege, cream pie, dirty talk, joel talks you through it. word count: 2.9k masterlist a/n: so this one is.... self-indulgent. shout out to all my friends on anti-depressants that are strugglin' to reach orgasm. me too, pals, me too. and there will be no medication shaming on this account, no there will not! so happy sunday, i hope someone else out there enjoys this short little thing with me x follow @hier--soirupdates if you'd like to be notified when i share my writing

Medication is a journey, they say. Every day will be different.

Medication is not the end all be all, they say. We can always try different avenues.

Six months on, now.

Six months since Let’s try the Zoloft for a few months.

Six months since We can reassess in April.

It’s June and summer has settled over Austin with a hot wet vengeance. April came and went with a mutual agreement that you weren’t ready to be weaned off yet. A gentle hand on your forearm and a softly spoken Why don’t we check in again in July?

A low dose. A starter dose. A you shouldn’t experience too many side-effects dose.

And she was right – for the most part. There were no headaches, no nausea, no dizzy spells, no changes in appetite. That shallow, low mood that’d been haunting you for months suddenly began to lift. Begrudging exercise in the afternoons, a three-meals-a-day regiment implemented by your boyfriend, and a happy little pill with every morning coffee.

But fuck – you can count the number of orgasms you’ve had since January on one hand.

Countless nights spent alone in your bed, tangled betwixt sweaty sheets, fingers and forearm cramping until you finally give up. Drink a cold glass of water, wet your face, and go to bed frustrated; a routine disappointment.

You’d gotten lucky a few times, of course. Vibrator on the highest setting possible, pussy all puffed up and numb from the rough speed. Frustrated tears in your eyes, lightheaded by the time you finally feel that sweet sweet relief coursing through your veins.

A few times with Joel, too, in those first few months. And ignorance was bliss—quite literally—until he caught onto what you’d been doing.

“What was different tonight?” he’d asked you on one of those nights, laid out beside each other in his bed. Chests heaving, satisfied smiles spread across your faces.

Your hand had paused against his head, fingers twisted up in his sweaty curls, and you hesitated. So quick, the briefest pause before trying to play it off, but he caught it. Always too perceptive, too watchful of an eye; especially since you’d been diagnosed.

“What’s wrong?” Joel frowned.

“I… didn’t… my…” you’d mumbled, face tucked against his pillow.

“Can’t hear you when you do that,” he pressed a kiss to your shoulder. “Baby?”

“I didn’t take my meds today,” you repeated, voice still low, still wary. But you could tell he heard you. Knew from the way his body stiffened beside you. From how when you looked over his smile had dropped, eyebrows pinching inward.

For a moment he didn’t even say anything. He hardly breathed. And then—Darlin’, why would you do that?—so painfully soft, the faintest tinge of worry in that deep, rasping voice of his.

“I don’t know,” you sighed, and something hot began to burn behind your eyes. Wet, pinching shame. “Just… I woke up and I wanted you. And I wanted it to feel like it used to for us, and I can never… you know I can’t finish when I’m on them, and I hate feeling like I’m disappointing you—”

“Baby,” Joel shook his head, strong hand cupping your jaw. His forehead knocked against yours; a tender but firm kind of insistence. The type that says look me in the fucking eyes and listen up. “You’re not disappointin’ me.”

“Joel,” you sighed, face hot, foreheads tacky where they pressed together.

“No,” he grunted. “I fuckin’ mean it. This stuff takes time, okay? We’ll figure it out the way we always do. Just… don’t do that again. Please.”

“I won’t,” you murmured feebly, nose smushed against his.

“Promise me,” Joel had urged you. “Promise me you’ll take your medicine.”

“I promise, Joel.”

You kept strong on that promise. Didn’t get frustrated when he’d stay over more nights than usual, or drag you back to his place in the evenings – all just to watch you pop that little white pill in the mornings.

It brought out something new in him, the day you’d showed him the prescription. Like some instinctual protectiveness was unlocked and he just kicked into hyperdrive.

Cutting work early to drive you to your doctor’s office, cooking up different meals every night for dinner.

Most days you wake up alone in his bed; wipe the sleep out of your eyes as you wander downstairs. Let him nudge you into a chair at the table, beside Sarah, so he can set identical bowls of cereal in front of the two of you—his girls. Hell, if you had a dollar for every time that man has said Breakfast is the most important meal of the day in the past six months, you’d have more money than you could spend.

Joel didn’t even get mad when you started smoking again in May.

Didn’t bat an eye when he found you at two in the morning, sat on the back porch in one of his sweatshirts with the smell of tobacco staining your fingers.

“Been a long time since I seen once of those in your mouth,” he’d smirked, settling onto the stoop beside you.

“I’m sorry,” you grimaced, remembering how proud he’d been when you quit. He rested his head against your shoulder, eyes watering with a yawn.

“S’late,” he grumbled sleepily. “N’you smell now.”

“I’m sorry,” you’d repeated, stamping the cigarette into the concrete. “Today was just… hard. Couldn’t sleep.”

“S’okay,” Joel told you. “Just don’t like it when you sneak out on me, yeah? You know I ain’t judgin’ you.”

The only thing that frustrates Joel, is that he comes, and you don’t.

And it’s not a frustration with you. No, it’s a hot faced guilt that spreads through him every time you fuck. Evident in those frantic touches, desperate pleas of your name, of tell me what to do, tell me how to help, of fuck I’m sorry.

Because you still want him, despite it all. Still can’t help your wandering hands, your fingers that tease back his bed sheets and then his boxers and coax orgasm after orgasm out of him, night after night.

Tonight, you thought, would be no different.

Covers strewn across the end of your bed, pillows askew, you sit astride his lap.

It’s hot; the AC in your apartment has been broken all week, and your thighs are tacky with sweat where they press against his skin. Everything wet – sweat in your hair, slick between your thighs, the soft squelching sound that raises with every press of his cock inside of you.

“Fuck,” Joel pants, hands tight against your waist. “I can’t—goddammit, I’m not gonna last, baby.”

“It’s okay,” you moan, eyelids heavy as you rock your hips over his.

It’s late, and you both have work early in the morning, but the burn is so good like this. The heavy weight of him reaching so far, pushing the limits of what your body can take. For years it’s been your favourite way to fuck him; poised above his body, admiring the way his stomach tightens and his eyes roll when you sink down on his cock.

“What can I do?” his voice is strained, the veins in his neck bulging as he holds his breath – anything to stave off the impending high.

You only whimper pathetically, grinding your hips into his. Can feel everything in your stomach knotting up into a white-hot ball.

“Hey,” Joel urges, hand landing in a soft slap against your outer thigh. “Talk to me.”

“I don’t know,” you cry out, shaking your head. “It’s right there, but I…”

“But what?” he murmurs, hips snapping up again.

“I don’t think I can,” you finally admit, eyebrows drawn tight in frustration. Your lower lip is bitten raw at this point, incessantly gnawed at by your own teeth. His grip tightens on your hips and he drags you upward until his length slips out, falling against his stomach with a wet smack.

“C’mon, tell me what you need,” he says quickly, and you’re sure that the desperation you see in his eyes is mirrored in your own. Pupils blown round and fat, endless black—pleading.

You stare down at him for a moment. Watch the way his chest heaves with harsh, stilted breathes. How little dots of sweat have gathered at the hollow of his throat. And fuck, you want it so bad.

“Top drawer,” you exhale roughly, pointing to the side table.

Joel doesn’t question the order. Doesn’t say a word as he spreads a long arm across the bed, yanking the drawer open and shoving his hand inside. You watch him rifle around for a moment, pulse increasing as you wait for him to find what you want. What you need. And you can tell when he does; his shoulders stiffen and he lets out a choked sort of sound, pulling out the black wand and shoving it into your hand.

“Show me,” he says, eyes wild.

Your finger drops down against the button, turning your hand to show him which one to press.

“There’s four settings,” you murmur, slipping it back into his palm.

“Does this normally help?” he asks, grunting softly as you grip his cock, notching the tip back at your entrance.

“Sometimes,” you sigh, sinking down, sucking in the heavy weight of him. “Can still take a—a little while.”

He presses the button tentatively, watching as the rounded head of the wand starts to vibrate. Spread open around him, he can see your swollen little clit so easily, and he lowers the wand to press against it. Your body jolts forward, mouth splitting open with a groan as heat flares through you. Your hips stutter against him instinctively, chasing that intense feeling, and he looses a gravelly moan at the feeling of your wasted cunt squeezing around him.

“Look at that,” Joel grunts, dark eyes trained on your face. That wicked pink tongue slips out to wet his lips and he nods in encouragement. “I know, baby, I know it’s a lot, you feel good?”

“Yes,” you gasp, jaw going slack as you settle into the feeling. “Fuck, yes, it’s good, it’s good.”

It’s nothing you’ve ever felt before; nothing your past boyfriends had ever been comfortable enough to try. It has the muscles in your thighs tensing up already; the thick press of his cock paired with that unrelenting, almost overbearing, vibration.

“Can feel it,” he hisses out, head tilting back into the mattress.

“Yeah?”

“Mm,” he nods, expression grim. The muscle in his jaw twitches. “So fuckin’ tight like this. All wound up, y’need it so bad, I know.”

You moan, eyelids fluttering as he presses the button again, notching it to a higher speed. You lift up slowly and then press back down over him, and the two of you groan in unison. His free hand falls against the curve of your ass and he squeezes, encouraging you to rock against him, starting up a steady pace.

One of your hands settles on your chest, fingers twisting and pulling at your nipples. You need more, always more, something, anything.

“Look so fuckin’ good like this,” Joel mutters, and you can tell how fucked out he is already as he watches you. Dark eyes glazing over, mouth hanging open deliriously. “My pretty girl, so damn good for me.”

Your heart stumbles in your chest and you whimper, appreciation for him flooding your senses. He’s been so close for so long tonight already, teetering precariously on that edge but holding off for you. Fucking you into the mattress before pulling out and tucking his face between your thighs, doing his damnedest to get you to that same place. Urging you to get on top, to take what you needed, to use him to get yourself off.

“I love you,” you mumble breathlessly, eyes pinching closed as something sharp starts to tingle at the bottom of your stomach.

“Fuck, fuck,” Joel snarls, hips snapping upward.

“What ar—” your words cut off with choked moan as he clicks the button again, and then again, taking it to the highest speed. Your shoulders shake and you tilt forward a little, hand gripping his shoulder to steady yourself.

“Joel,” you cry out, chest heaving and stomach tightening.

Your fingers wrap around his wrist, searching for something to ground yourself against. That firm press against your clit doesn’t falter for a second, and you let out a rough moan.

“Good,” he grunts. “Good girl, give it to me.”

The muscle in his bicep spasms and strains beneath the skin, everything pulled taut as he keeps the wand pressed firmly against you. And it’s almost painful, the way you can feel your high coiling inside you, burning, but never quite reaching fever pitch the way you need it to.

A symphony that builds and billows and writhes within you. Sloping swells of violins and cellos and trumpets. Up, up, up to that shattering crescendo you just can’t seem to reach.

“Joel,” you mewl, and there’s tears in your eyes, on your cheeks. Hot, fat tears that stain your face now, dripping from your chin to splatter against his chest.

“C’mon now,” he grunts, hips shifting up off the bed, meeting you thrust for thrust. The stretch of his cock is so wide, so deep, and every shift of his body punches the air from your lungs.

“I don’t know if I can,” you shake your head, stomach on fire. The vibrations are so intense, the speed so fast, you can feel your clit going numb beneath it. But Joel doesn’t pull away, doesn’t stop the fast pace of his hips. The muscles in his abdomen twitch under you, tan skin glistening with sweat.

“You’re so close,” he goads, jaw tight. “Don’t fight it, baby.”

“Stop moving,” you beg then, your voice a high keen. Joel stills instantly, wary eyes darting across your face. He doesn’t pull the vibrator away though. Not yet.

“Fuck,” you cry out, hand firm against his stomach. “Just let me-just—”

Knees on fire against the bed, you grind your hips down into his. Gasp as his cock presses hot and heavy against something deep inside of you that sets your entire body shaking, vibrating against him; buzzing at the same high-speed rhythm as the wand between your legs. You rut against him again and again and then something pulls tight and hot at the base of your spine.

“Oh, fuck,” you gasp, eyes widening. “Oh god, Joel, I think—”

“Shh, I know, I know,” he moans. A bead of sweat rolls from his hairline to his chin. “You’re okay, let it happen.”

“Touch me,” you say, breathless and needy and so so desperate. “Fuck, please.”

Joel groans – a deep, guttural thing. A sound that comes from somewhere in the base of his stomach. It rattles your bones and has your fingernails digging into his stomach, and then his hand is on your chest. Rough fingers squeezing and stroking and pinching and you’re gasping, keening his name as he whispers frenzied words of encouragement and it’s building it’s building it’s building and and and—

Everything goes silent when you come. It’s all blurred vision and deafened ears; an intense ache in your jaw from the way your mouth hangs open. You can feel a vein in your neck, raging beneath the skin; a staccato rushing sound that echoes inside your head.

And you think you can hear Joel’s voice, somewhere beyond it all; Fuck, there it is, good girl, good fuckin’ girl.

When your eyes flutter open, you can only see Joel’s face swimming in your vision. His eyes rolling back, lips parted as he snarls your name.

“Fuck,” he spits. “—yeah, that’s it, there we fuckin’ go.”

You feel his cock kick inside of you; fast jerking spasms and then a warm rush as he starts to come. Your hand wraps around his, pushing the wand to the side of the bed, but he doesn’t fucking stop. He grips your waist and fucks up into you, spitting curses and warbled slurs of your name as he pumps you full of his hot spend.

It’s obscene – a mix of your come and his, squeezing out around his girth and smearing against the inside of your thighs. It pools around the base of his cock and you whimper at the sight, swollen cunt still tightening around him. Only when you start to sag down against his chest does he rest, his thighs twitching and tensing with the aftershocks of his high.

Joel raises a hand, calloused thumb brushing the tears from your cheeks. Then, carefully, he grips the back of your neck, guiding you down to rest against his chest.

Your shoulders slump and you press a lazy kiss against the jut of his collarbone. And for a moment there’s just this. No sounds but that of heavy breaths and a soft buzzing, forgotten somewhere in the sheets. The swipe of his fingertips down your spine, your lips against his salty skin. A gentle tap against your waist and he’s slipping out of you with a sigh, but not letting you pull away, not letting you move from where you’ve collapsed directly on top of him.

“Missed that,” you slur sleepily, fighting to keep your eyes open.

“Me too,” he mumbles. “Did so good. Made me proud.”

“S’that right?” you smile against his skin.

“S’right, baby.”

You hum, dragging your head up to press a kiss against his mouth. Both of you so exhausted that it’s just a brief, lazy swipe of your lips, but it’s enough. It’s thank you.

“Shower?” he suggests softly, smiling up at you.

“Or… cigarette?” you respond, eyebrows raised, teasing.

“Watch it,” he smarts, laying a quick smack against your ass before nudging you off of him. He stands and holds out a hand to help you off the bed, tutting underneath his breath. “Although I guess you’ve earned it.”

a/n: in hindsight, idk why the fuck i wrote that it took them six months to try this but what can you do lmao.

thank you for reading! x

#my writing #fic: take your medicine #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller smut #joel miller x reader #joel miller one shot

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andvys · 8 months ago

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Dancing with our hands tied | S.H.

Chapter five ⭐︎ 'Cause you know it could never be

Warnings: alcohol consumption, mentions of the upside down, mentions of unrequited feelings, mentions of Stancy (I guess), but none really

Pairing: Steve Harrington x fem!reader

Summary: Weeks had passed since your conversation with Steve, and things between you have shifted into a different direction...

Word count: 8k+

Author's note: @hellfire--cult shoutout to my bestieeee, thank you for helping me and for keeping me in check, I love u

Series masterlist ⭐︎ Previous chapter ⭐︎ Next chapter

♡

As the weeks passed, the warmth slowly started to surround Hawkins. The flowers have all bloomed, the sun is blessing the town with light and it’s something you greatly appreciate, knowing that things could’ve been so different had victory not been the outcome weeks back.

The day Steve had come by to apologize and talk, things had started to change between the two of you. While you tried to avoid him at all costs, fearing more confrontations and arguments, Steve had done everything to show you that he really wanted to keep the peace between you both.

You felt awkward around him for the first few days after your conversation, especially because it felt like he was walking on eggshells when he was around you, he bit his tongue whenever you tried to throw a jab at him, he looked at you differently, he was careful with his words and it annoyed you to no end. You never wanted him to feel like he had to be nice to you after what happened. Luckily, he couldn’t keep his act up for long, the moment you said something that was enough to set him off, you went back to your usual banters – though, it didn’t feel as rough as it did before.

You were also dragged into everything involving the whole group. It’s something you would have hated if it wasn’t for Eddie who somehow had nestled his way into your life and reached for the title ‘best friend’ before you could even blink. Despite the fear that still lingered deep inside of you, you let him in and you are glad that you did so. You really needed a friend.

But you are not the only one who grew close to Eddie in the past few weeks, Steve has also taken a great liking to him, and you now see more of him than ever before, because now it isn’t only the weekly movie or game nights that you spend time with him, it’s also Tuesday nights at the hideout, Wednesday nights at the movies, Sunday mornings at the diner and… you don’t mind for a single second.

You used to watch him from afar, now he is everywhere you go and while the relationship you two have isn’t exactly friendly, you still appreciate it. You’ll take anything you can get when it comes to him.

You eye Eddie through the vanity mirror, watching as he lounges on your bed, flipping through some old magazine he had found on your shelf. His curls are wild on his head, a little tamer than usual though, a few new rings adorn his fingers as well as the new shirt that doesn’t exactly fit the occasion.

“Eddie, you could have at least put a nice shirt on! A black one! Without a stupid band logo at the front!”

“Stupid?” He gasps as he sits up, staring at you, looking very offended, “let me remind you, Sweetheart. None of them are stupid, they are meaningful and artistic.”

Max scoffs at him, trying not to shake her head as you’re still using the hot curling iron on her hair.

“Right, because the music video of that Samuel made absolutely fucking sense.”

He drops the magazine and jumps up from the bed, his jaw dropping at her words.

“You mean Samson!?” He almost yells, “Biceps of Steel is a masterpiece, Red!”

You and Max share a look of amusement through the mirror, scoffing simultaneously.

“Yeah, you made me watch that video like four times,” she rolls her eyes at him.

Eddie squints his eyes at her, continuing his ramble while you smile at their bantering.

Not only did you and Eddie grow closer, he and Max did too. Eddie’s new home is close to Max’s, just like back in the trailer park. And the teen just loves to bother Eddie and Uncle Wayne, more so Eddie in the early morning hours, knowing how grumpy he will get. She still snaps at him and judges his ‘poor’ taste in movies and music but he only judges back, though playfully. They behave like siblings and you never get bored watching their banters.

Eddie is the brother Max deserved to have.

“Bla bla bla,” she rolls her eyes at him, sighing in relief when you finish up with the final touches.

“Who taught you to be so rude, Red?” Eddie shakes his head in disapproval.

Max only laughs in response, she leans closer to the mirror and turns her head to the side as she touches her curls. Her eyes meet yours and a smile appears on her face, “thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” you smile as you put the curling iron on your vanity.

Max gets up from the chair, she walks out of the room and into the hallway, still limping a little but the cast on her leg is already gone.

“I’ll call Lucas and see if he’s ready,” she says as she walks down the stairs.

You turn to face Eddie, who is staring at the dress you are wearing, like he only noticed it now. The playful smile on his face is now gone, replaced by a teasing one.

“Got all pretty for someone?” He asks, wiggling his eyebrows at you.

You tilt your head and squint your eyes, “it was a formal invitation, Eddie! You just didn’t get the memo.” You point to his band shirt before you turn away from him and sit down on the chair, picking up your lipstick that you haven’t applied yet.

Eddie rolls his eyes at your words, walking closer to you, he leans down and puts his hands on his knees, staring at you through the mirror.

“Darling, apple of my eye, sweetheart, long lost soulmate… I am not buying shit.”

You keep staring at your lips, careful not to go over the lines as you apply the rosy tone to them, only when you’re done and you put the lipstick in the bag you had picked out earlier, you look up at him with a sigh.

“It’s the same as always, Eddie.”

“Is it?” He tilts his head, still looking at you with that same teasing smile. “Cause while you do wear all these trendsetter outfits, I never saw you wear a dress this… fancy.”

“Trendsetter outfits?” You laugh, furrowing your brows at him. “And fancy? It’s just a black dress!”

He raises his brows, stepping away as he looks down at the silky fabric on your form.

“A little black dress.”

“Well, look who’s the trendsetter now!” You snort.

He walks back to your bed, picking up the fashion magazine that has a little black dress on the cover. He raises it up, showing it to you, “Vogue taught me.”

Shaking your head, you look back at your reflection and add the final touches to your hair, before you apply your favorite perfume. You get up and smoothe down your dress, it’s beautiful and you have been dying for a chance to wear it. But your stomach suddenly fills with doubt because of his reaction. Are you overdressed? No… right? It’s truly nothing special. It’s just a dress, a little black and silky dress, nothing fancy about it.

Besides, Joyce invited you all to a formal dinner, after all. You can’t show up in jeans and a t-shirt, even Max put on a skirt today and that girl hates dresses and skirts with a passion.

But maybe Eddie was right, maybe… you did think of a certain someone when you bought this dress, and maybe you do feel your insides tingling at the thought of seeing him again tonight, maybe you did get pretty for him – even when you know that he will have eyes for somebody else all night. That thought makes you want to stay at home and hide from the world but you can’t back out now, you couldn’t even decline the invitation you got from Joyce herself when you ran into her at the coffee shop two weeks ago.

She is one of the few people in this godforsaken town that you have always liked. Finding out that she is now dating Jim Hopper – the very alive Jim Hopper, wasn’t exactly a surprise to you. You heard all the rumors about them, even before you were dragged into the mess your new friends had been in for the past few years. – The bored middle aged women who met up at the coffee shop every Wednesday afternoon just loved to talk about all the existent and non-existent relationships in this town and well, you loved to hear about all the gossip too, though you always acted like you were immersed in the books you had brought, you really never read a single line whenever they were providing each other new drama.

On the drive to the Byers/Hopper house, you picked up Lucas before you made a quick stop at the store to buy a cake, none of you wanted to show up with empty hands and you didn’t know what else to get – besides the little bouquet of flowers that Lucas got for Joyce.

As you look out the window, watching the passing trees, you listen to Eddie’s conversation with Lucas.

“You ever wonder how Hopper explained his return from the dead?” Eddie asks as he plays with his sunglasses, “cause I’m really curious.”

“I am too,” Lucas says from the backseat.

“Do you think he went with the kidnapping story?” Eddie asks, his sunglasses low on his nose as he glances at you. “Imagine he told Chief Powell and Deputy Dumbass about the upside down.”

“Don’t say that too loud, Eds. Or the suit wearing dicks will come back to take all our hush money back,” you snort. “And then you’ll lose your fancy house and your fancy Barbecue grill.”

He waves his hand at you, “I’ll take my fancy Barbecue grill and move in with you. I’ll still have a fancy house, rich girl.”

You snort.

“Oh, can I move in then too?” Lucas asks, grinning at you. “You always got the best snacks,” he points to the store bought cake on your lap.

“Eddie and I chose the cake together,” you chuckle.

“Well, duh, we’d make great roommates, sweets,” Eddie winks at you. “Same taste in food – but you still need to up your music taste.”

You scoff.

“Honestly, I think a girls only place would be so much cooler,” Max says to him, “just peace all the time, no boys, no stinky clothes lying around… just pure girls heaven.”

Lucas frowns at her, tilting his head, “you say that to your boyfriend?”

Eddie snorts at the offended tone in Lucas’s voice, while you shake your head in amusement.

The burgundy BMW is already in the driveway when Eddie pulls up, he parks his car behind Steve’s. You inwardly curse at yourself for feeling a rush of something just from looking at his car. You tear your eyes away from it and take in the beautiful sight in front of you, instead.

The light blue house has a big porch, flowers on the grass in front of it, a big willow tree on the right side – it’s so pretty and this neighborhood is a quiet one, it’s perfect.

Lucas rings the doorbell, waiting patiently with the flowers in his hands that Max keeps teasing him about, giggling and making jabs at him until he finally gets fed up. He picks out one of the daisies and turns around to face his girlfriend, he brushes her hair back and tucks the little flower behind her hair, which shuts her up immediately, her eyes widen and she starts blushing furiously.

You press your lips together, so you don’t burst into giggles at the look on her face.

Lucas sighs in contentment when she grows silent, he turns back to the door.

Eddie though, he starts chuckling.

Max clenches her jaw, she sends Eddie the deadliest glare you have ever seen. It only makes you want to laugh even more.

The door opens and you’re all greeted by a very happy El, a bright smile on her lips as she waves at you.

“Hi guys, come in!” She reaches forward to Max, grabbing her hand and pulling her into the house, “I need to tell you something.”

The two girls scurry away and up the stairs, leaving the three of you standing on the porch.

Lucas shakes his head, sighing, “you know, I wouldn’t be surprised if Max left me to be with El.”

Eddie throws his arm around Lucas’s shoulder as they both step inside the house, “every girl has a girlfriend, just deal with it, Sinclair.”

“What?” You laugh, following them,“I don’t have a girlfriend.”

“Oh, it’ll happen magically, Sweetheart. Once you have a boyfriend, you’ll also find a girlfriend.”

“That literally makes no sense.”

“Oh,” Lucas smirks, looking over his shoulder at you, “he means, once you and Steve stop acting like you hate each other and you’ll fall in love and get together, you won’t only have a boyfriend, you will also have a girlfriend which is his best friend,” he wiggles his eyebrows at you.

You roll your eyes and ignore the way your cheeks heat up at the word ‘boyfriend’. Steve will never be your boyfriend, he won’t even be anything close to it. Hell, he is barely even a friend. He is your frenemy.

You open your mouth to speak when Joyce walks out into the hallway, smiling at the three of you before a gasp falls from her lips when Lucas hands her the flowers.

“Oh, you’re such a sweetheart, Lucas,” she smiles down at the flowers.

You feel a little out of place, being new to this group, being in a tight friend group for the first time in your life feels nerve wracking. And while you aren’t the only one, Eddie is definitely way more sociable and open than you are, where you struggle to make conversations, he rambles on just about anything.

But Joyce makes you feel welcome, she greets you with a warm smile, placing her hand on your arm.

“We got you your favorite,” Eddie grins at her, taking the cake from your hands so you can greet her properly.

“Oh, you shouldn’t have! You’re all so kind,” she smiles at the both of you, “come on, I’ll put it in the fridge for now. You guys go ahead, Jonathan and Nancy are in the backyard with Hop, the kids are in the living room.”

When you step inside, you notice the smell of food from the kitchen and the dining room, the sound of music playing from the stereo – Joy Division. You know right away that Jonathan was the one who put on the music.

You greet Mike, Will and Dustin who are in a heated conversation about something D&D related.

Robin walks into the living room, her blue eyes meet yours and a smile appears on her face.

You eye her up and down, she’s wearing black dress pants, suspenders over her red blouse. Your lips curl into a smirk when your eyes meet hers. She opens her arms for you and you hug her, leaning closer to her ear, “if I was into girls, I’d be on the floor for you right now, Buckley,” you joke, suggestively.

She gasps and slaps your arm lightly, “naughty.”

A giggle falls from your lips when you pull away from the hug, “it’s the truth, you look hot in this outfit.”

She shakes her head, biting her lip as she tries to hide the blush on her cheeks.

“You’re one to talk,” she whispers, smirking when she takes a look at your dress, “how did Munson not crash the car?”

Your lips part in shock, and you look down, “i-is that too revealing?” You whisper, tugging at your dress.

She starts chuckling, “no, I just mean because you’re so gorgeous,” she winks. “I know I’d crash the car, I’d be too busy staring at you.”

“Oh my god,” you swat her arm this time, “Eddie and I are not attracted to each other.” And you’re certainly not lying about that.

“Robin, I see her the same way you see Steve,” Eddie suddenly says from behind you, throwing his arm around your shoulder. “Difference? I’m heterosexual,” he whispers to her before he looks at you, “no offense, it’s not that you’re not hot, it’s just that you’re a little gremlin to me already.”

Your eyes flash with amusement and you put your hand on your chest, “I will take offense to that actually.”

Your stomach flutters when your eyes fall on the figure in the kitchen.

“Sucks to be you then,” he chuckles, “anyways, how’s Vickie doing?” He wiggles his brows at Robin.

You don’t even hear Eddie’s words, you’re already too far gone, staring at the one you had your eyes set on since forever. You don’t know how he always does it, but he looks so gorgeous. His fluffy hair looking better than ever, a smile lingering on his face as he talks to Joyce.

His white shirt is tucked into his dark brown slacks that he paired with a black belt. He looks like he walked straight out of a 60s movie and god, he looks really good. He turns his back to you, and you watch as Joyce leaves the kitchen, walking out into the backyard.

You don’t feel your feet moving, but you feel yourself being pulled into the kitchen, still admiring Steve – his broad shoulders, the way his muscles are moving underneath the shirt.

You are practically drooling over the guy, and you feel shame but not enough to stop yourself from ogling him, maybe you’d feel a bit more ashamed if things between you haven’t shifted into something else, you still get on each other’s nerves, the bickering is still there, poking into each other's ribs to see who bends first, but all that is never too much or hurtful. The scowls are there, they never left, the scrunches of noses, the deadly glares. But you noticed that the bickering had gone from yelling to soft talking. Enough for just the two of you to hear, no one else.

It’s all still the same… but it also isn’t.

And you can’t help but love it.

Steve is cutting vegetables and throwing them into the bowl. Your heart flutters as you take another moment to look at him. While the others are chatting in the living room and in the garden, Steve is helping Joyce prepare dinner. Cute.

You lick your lips, moving closer to him, you brush your hand over his shoulder as you walk past him, not even realizing how soft your touch actually was.

Steve tenses up, not because he doesn’t like your touch – but because he does. He likes it, even if he would never admit it. He recognizes you by the sweet and flowery scent of your perfume, something that makes his insides tingle in an unfamiliar way.

“Hey, Lego head,” you greet him, leaning against the counter next to him, “nice mousse on the hair.”

A smirk tugs at his lips, he puts down the knife as he opens his mouth to speak, though when he turns to look at you, his breathing stutters, his heart stops beating and his eyes widen as the smirk slowly falls – instead, his cheeks heat up and he presses his lips back together, gulping as he takes in the sight of you in your beautiful dress. It’s not any different from the sundresses that you’ve been wearing a lot lately, but it would be enough to make him stutter if he tried to talk right now, because somehow, you look even more beautiful, right now.

You turn away from him, looking around at the food he had already helped prepare, giving him the perfect opportunity to ogle you. It’s a good thing he stopped cutting the fruit, and put the knife down before he saw you, he surely would’ve chopped a finger off by now, and he’s not sure if he would have noticed because, all that he is focused on is how pretty you look, with your glowy, smooth skin and the makeup that you don’t even need, the dress that almost has him on his knees.

But he gets dragged back into reality when your eyes meet his and he remembers who you aren’t supposed to be – a girl who effortlessly manages to make him blush. No one has ever made Steve Harrington blush, absolutely no one, and he surely won’t let you be the first.

“Blondie.”

“Do you think they’ll let us drink?” You ask, looking around as you try to spot anything but soda.

Steve chuckles, shaking his head.

“Are you twenty one yet? No. What makes you think that Hopper will let us drink?” He picks up the knife again, forcing his eyes away from you.

“We fought monsters and had near death experiences multiple times,” you roll your eyes and cross your arms over your chest, “will alcohol hurt us?”

“No, but it might turn you into an alcoholic, better not start with that, kid.” Hopper suddenly appears from behind, causing you to flinch.

Steve watches from the side, laughing at the wide eyed look on your face.

You turn to face the older man, scrunching up your nose when your eyes instantly fall on the beer in his hand, “oh, really? What’s that in your hand then, alcoholic?” You mock him.

Hopper shakes his head, chuckling.

“So that’s where El’s attitude has been coming from lately.”

“Told you, miss sunshine over here is a bad influence,” Steve jokes.

“Don’t know which attitude you’re talking about, I don’t have one.”

At that, both Steve and Hopper burst out laughing, the latter squeezes your shoulder as he walks past you, “you keep telling yourself that, kid.”

“Well, aren’t we celebrating something today?” You ask.

Hopper opens the fridge, taking out another beer after throwing the empty can into the trash. He looks at you with raised brows, a smile tugging at his lips.

None of you know what this celebration even is about, that you all got invited to – except for El, Jonathan and Will, of course. They know all about it.

“Yeah.”

“So… can’t celebrate without the drinks,” you shrug, giving him a sheepish smile.

You’re unaware of the smile on Steve’s lips as he watches you.

“You’re nineteen, wait two more years–”

“We fought interdimensional monsters, this one almost got strangled to death,” you point at Steve, “not to mention all the times he got his ass kicked–”

“You didn’t need to go there, Blondie,” he rolls his eyes.

“I almost died! A girl can have a drink, come on!”

Hopper sighs, crossing his arms over his chest as he looks between the two of you.

You are desperate for a drink, it’s been months since you had any alcohol in your system, and you’re craving the buzz, feeling careless and free. All you felt after the night at the Creel house was pain… and more pain. Your head was constantly hurting, your vision blurred every time you got up, the dizziness drove you crazy – it’s still there sometimes, but you feel better now, much better, good enough to have drinks again.

But the stubborn man won’t let you have it and you can already tell by the look on his face that he will say no. So, you pull out the big guns.

You smirk at him, tilting your head.

“My dad told me what you used to get up to in high school.”

He holds his hands up, squeezing his eyes shut in annoyance.

“Didn’t you and Joyce used to smoke pot behind–”

Steve’s eyes widen as his lips part in surprise.

“Get this demon a drink, Steve.” He waves his hand and quickly leaves the room, sending you another warning glance over his shoulder.

“Why me…” Steve mutters.

“Cause you’re maid material, chop chop, Harrington.”

He sighs, rolling his eyes again.

“Oh hey Hop, long time no see.” You hear Eddie’s voice in the living room, followed by Hopper’s groan.

If you weren’t so fixated on Steve right now, you’d be watching Eddie’s and Hopper’s interaction, right now. It’s never not amusing.

“You sure you want me to make you a drink?” He steps away from the counter and bends down to open the cabinet he saw Hopper putting the whiskey into earlier, he looks through the few bottles and reaches for the rum.

You watch the way he furrows his brows, licking his lips as stares at the bottle. He straightens his back and steps up beside you again.

“Well, didn’t you used to throw parties and mix cocktails?” You shrug, tilting your head to the side.

Steve watches you, the way your flashes flutter as you blink, the way you look at him so innocently, something that makes him feel… intrigued.

“I never got to taste it,” you pout.

He swallows harshly.

“I’m craving something sweet on my lips right now, so please… Can you make me a drink?” You ask with a sickly sweet tone in your voice, not intending these words to sound so… suggestive and you don’t even notice it either.

But he does, and he almost drops the bottle he is holding. Your flirty words make his eyes widen and his stomach flutters. It’s not the first time something like this happened, you threw suggestive words or glances at him before but all this time he was certain that you did this unintended – even now, because the look on your face is innocent, genuinely innocent.

You aren’t teasing, you aren’t even aware of how flirty you can be sometimes.

He turns away from you, walking over to the fridge, he grabs the pineapple juice and puts it on the counter next to the bottle of rum.

He looks up at the shelf, where all the long drink glasses are. How convenient it is that you’re standing right in front of it.

While you do everything unintended, he doesn’t. He knows what he is doing when he steps towards you. He looks down at you with that same innocent look that you just gave him, the only difference is that he isn’t innocent. He places his hand on your waist, testing the waters. “Excuse me,” he murmurs, squeezing your waist ever so softly. He reaches over your shoulder as he grabs the glass, he keeps his eyes on you, biting back the smirk when he sees the way your eyes widen and you visibly gulp.

Your lips part and you start blinking, looking up at him before your eyes fall to his chest and you squirm beneath his stare.

Got you. He thinks.

You stop breathing and your heart freaking jumps in your chest, his innocent touch is almost enough to make your knees buckle.

Despite the nervousness, you look into his eyes, watching the way they twinkle with mischief. Bastard. Is he doing this on purpose? Because he somehow knows that every slightest touch from him drives you crazy?

He takes way too long to get that stupid glass from the shelf but fuck, you can’t help but love the way his big hand feels on your body, or the way he is almost pressed against you, the way the smell of his cologne makes your stomach flutter.

And then, he steps away like nothing happened.

Because it was nothing… to him.

Even when there’s a hint of a smirk on his lips as he prepares the drink, you know that this was only because he wanted to get a reaction out of you.

“Here,” he slides the drink over to you, still smirking, “try it.”

You wrap your hand around the cold glass and take the straw between your fingers, stirring the ice around, furrowing your brows, “what’s this called?”

He crosses his arms over his chest, “the King Steve special,” he winks.

You scrunch your face up at him.

Wrapping your lips around the straw, you look into his eyes as you try it, the sweetness from the pineapple juice definitely overpowers the taste of rum, and you don’t know if you like it or not.

Steve ignores the way his stomach tingles from watching you – watching your glossy lips as they’re wrapped around the black straw.

“Jesus, that really is a high school drink, King Steve.”

He squints his eyes at you, “it’s a fucking drink, Blondie.”

“A horrible one at that.”

He places his hand on his hip, rolling his eyes at your words, but a smirk tugs at his lips and he suddenly leans closer to you to whisper in your ear.

“You really fooled me with that dress of yours… if only you kept your mouth shut.”

He wants to stay and keep staring at the shocked look on your face, at the way you grow so flustered beneath his stare. The smirk that lingers on his lips grows even wider when he sees the way your lips part but close again.

He left you speechless.

He reaches for the bowl of salad, “gonna bring this out,” he says, tilting his head into the direction of the garden, “they set up the table outside.”

You don’t even hear his words, you just stare at his lips before your eyes fall on the chain around his neck. You swallow and look down, hiding your flustered face as you take another sip of the drink.

Steve holds back the chuckle, he turns away begrudgingly and walks out, he would’ve loved to see more of that look on your face.

It takes you a moment to recover from whatever that was, you nearly down the King Steve Special in one go. And maybe preparing yourself a second drink is a mistake, knowing that you will probably feel more than just a slight buzz, you only had breakfast and you skipped lunch because you were too busy getting ready and stressing over your hair that never looks nearly as perfect as Steve’s does.

You step out into the backyard, the table on the porch is already filled with food and drinks, the smell of the Barbecue lingering in the air. Jonathan is standing in front of the grill with Nancy by his side, her chin on his shoulder, her arm wrapped around his waist, they’re talking and smiling at each other.

As you watch them, the sudden realization that you will never have anything like they do, fills you with a slight sadness.

You don’t envy them, you’re happy for them, you’re happy for anyone who gets to experience love. But maybe, you envy the love someone else still holds for her, someone you will never have.

You look down, frowning at your drink.

The teens all stumble out into the backyard as Joyce ushers them to the table.

You flinch a little when you suddenly feel an arm around your shoulder, instantly recognizing Eddie’s cologne, you turn your head to look at him.

“This could be us if you weren’t such a gremlin,” he says as he points to Jonathan and Nancy who are now kissing, in front of the sizzling meat that is probably now burning.

You squint your eyes, shaking your head disapprovingly.

You know he’s only joking, and it fills you with relief, because as much as you crave what they have, you definitely don’t crave it with Eddie. You crave to have this with Steve, and it’s something you feel stupid for. The guy may not hate your guts anymore, but he’s surely not your biggest fan either.

“You know, you’re a gremlin too, Eds.”

“That’s why we’re best friends,” he chuckles, patting your shoulder as he looks down at the drink in your hand, “what’s that?”

“King Steve Special,” you snort, offering it to him, “well, this one was made by me.”

“Can I try?”

You hand it to him, and his curious eyes widen when he takes a sip, “wow, that is uh–”

“Too sweet?”

He shakes his head at you, curls bouncing, “nah, it’s perfect.”

“Well, you can have it, I might get drunk if I finish that.”

“Already!?” He scoffs, shaking his head at you, “lightweight.”

"Uh, excuse me? I haven’t had any drinks in months, Eddie. Months.”

“Well, I haven’t had any in weeks, I’m still standing.”

“You only took one sip!”

He takes another sip and grins at you, holding up two fingers.

“Two sips.”

You can’t even help but laugh, slapping his shoulder lightly, “you are so–”

“Funny? Handsome? Perfect?”

“Too cocky?” Lucas says behind Eddie, grinning at him.

“Me and cocky?” Eddie raises his brows, “never.”

“Oh no, that kid is right, boy. You’re cocky,” Hopper sighs, “trust me.”

“Well, I am also very fast, Chief,” he smirks, winking at the older man, “but you already know that.”

Hopper’s amused face grows serious, a hardened look takes over and he grumbles something under his breath as he stares at Eddie. You can’t even help but giggle. – A sound that doesn’t go unheard by Steve who just sat down across from Robin, not even hiding the fact that he no longer listens to her rambling about some movie she watched with Vickie last night. All he can do, all he can see, all he can hear right now is you, just you.

The sound of your giggles is not something he is used to – he is used to your grumbling, to your sarcastic chuckles and the smirks on your face. A giggle? A very unusual sound to hear but something that he’s been hearing quite often lately. If your friendship with Eddie wasn’t so obvious, he might’ve thought that you took a liking towards him, but it’s clear that your friendship with him is just like his with Robin; Platonic with a capital P.

He can’t help but smile as he watches you, not because he likes you, god no. He just likes watching you. You are pretty, gorgeous even. He always knew that, even through his dislike, he always saw your beauty – he isn’t blind. And seeing you like this makes his chest feel… warm.

He eyes your dress again, the lace on the straps lay so prettily on your shoulders, the silky material fitting your upper body so perfectly, it’s loose on your hips, and it’s short, not too short but enough to make him gulp.

The chair scrapes against the floor, but even that sound doesn’t tear his attention away from you.

Nancy steps up beside you, exchanging a few words with you and Eddie before she turns her head into Steve’s direction, she lifts her hand and points at him, something that instantly makes Steve tense up, because not only did Eddie catch him staring at you, you did too.

With his cheeks blushing red, he clears his throat and turns back to Robin who is now rambling Dustin’s ear off. He places his elbow on the armrest, running his fingers through his hair nervously.

What is wrong with him? Since when does he spend time staring at you? Since when does he blush because of you?

“Here you can sit next to your favorite person, gremlin.”

He doesn’t know who he expected to sit down beside him, but he surely didn’t think it’d be you. He goes to lift his head when you pull back the chair. Just as he’s about to glance at you, he suddenly feels your hand on his knee and hears your groan as you stumble forward a little.

“Almost broke my ankle, for fucks sake. I’m sorry, Lego head,” you mumble, inwardly cursing at yourself for tripping over the stupid leg chair and using him to steady yourself. You remove your hand when you finally sit down, turning away from him to hide the flustered look on your face.

He blinks, swallowing the lump in his throat, he plasters a smirk on his face, “are you drunk from that one drink, Blondie?” He chuckles, watching the way you roll your eyes at his question.

You feel a slight buzz, but you’re not sure whether it’s because of the alcohol or his ‘flirty’ comment that certainly had no meaning.

Steve loves to flirt and he does it every chance he gets but he definitely wouldn’t flirt with you, no matter how desperate he’d be, you’d never be good enough for Steve Harrington.

When everyone is finally seated and the rest of the food is now on the table, Hopper is standing up with a drink in his hand, waiting for the teen boys to stop talking so he can finally open his mouth to speak. He tries to be patient, he really tries.

Joyce looks down in amusement.

Jonathan waves at Dustin, trying to shut him up, but the boy doesn’t see, too focused on the conversation with Mike.

“Mike,” El whispers, nudging him with her elbow.

He looks away from Dustin, and turns to look at his girlfriend when his eyes find Hopper glaring at him with that very intimidating look on his face.

His face grows pale and he slowly leans back in his seat, punching Dustin in the arm to shut up.

Hopper clears his throat, he puts his hand on the back of his neck, squinting his eyes a little. It’s silent now, except for the faint music that still plays in the living room. His throat bobbed as he looked around the table.

You can tell that he struggles to find his words, by the note that sticks out of the pocket in his flannel, you can tell that he had already prepared a speech.

Joyce gives him an encouraging nod as she reaches for his hand.

“I uh– I just, I thought that it would be a great idea for us all to sit down and uh… chat. I’m not good at all of this so I’ll just jump straight into it,” he starts, chuckling at his own words, before seriousness takes over his features again, “you kids went through a lot, you went through too much, every single one of you. But you were all so brave, you stuck together and defeated that… son of a bitch.”

Giggles erupt around him and his lip twitches a little.

“We defeated him,” El says, smiling at her dad, “we defeated that son of a bitch, “together.”

“Language, kid,” Hopper chuckles but he shakes his head at her, “but yeah, together.”

“The past few years haven’t been easy for any of you,” he continues, looking at all the young teens, at his daughter, at Jonathan and Nancy but also at Robin and Steve, and then he looks between you and Eddie too. “You all lost something or someone, you shouldn’t know what it’s like but uh, I guess in all of this chaos, you all found each other and I-I think that’s, that’s something, that means a lot.”

You can tell that he is struggling to say these words out loud, you hear the shakiness in his voice, the way he is holding himself together, the way he is speaking so softly because of how emotional he is after he spent the past few years in darkness after losing people he loved.

El and Joyce stepped into his life and so much chaos followed when he was dragged into a mess he had only seen in movies before, but it also brought him so much light and happiness again.

Just like it did for you and you wouldn’t change a thing about it.

If you had to go back and relive all the awful things you had to endure those few weeks back, you would’ve done it in a heartbeat. Because, despite the horrors and the darkness you had been pulled into, you have found friends, a family. You found a best friend again, Eddie who sits across from you, smiling at you because he too, found a best friend in you.

And you and Steve, you aren’t close by any means, but you are happy to have him in your life now, even if only like this.

“And I, I found a family and my uh beautiful soon to be wife.”

It takes a moment for the words to sink in.

It takes another moment for everyone to lose their calmness.

When the soft smiles vanish and the shocked and surprised looks take over your faces, Joyce and Hopper can’t help but laugh.

“W-Wait what!?” Dustin shrieks, “you’re getting married!?”

“Yep,” Hopper nods, smiling proudly.

El is smiling excitedly, clapping her hands together, like she is relieved that it’s no longer a secret, “and I can’t wait for the wedding!”

Nancy and Jonathan laugh at her excitement, while Dustin still looks between the older couple.

You glance at Eddie, who is staring at Hopper like he wants to say something but he bites his tongue, not wanting to ruin the sweet moment with one of his jokes.

“And we want you all to be there,” Hopper nods with a small smile on his face, “it wasn’t my idea to invite you all, just so you know.”

Everyone laughs at his words and the fake grumpy look on his face, by now you all know that the former Chief isn’t as mean and cold as everyone always knew him to be.

“It was his idea,” Joyce smiles, cheekily.

“Of course it was, he loves us!” Dustin grins at Hopper.

“Well, congrats,” Robin smiles brightly, “I can’t believe you’re inviting a bunch of kids but hey, I’m excited!”

Joyce gives her a warm smile, while Hopper grumbles something under his breath as he looks between Dustin and Mike.

After all the congratulations go around, Hopper finally takes a seat, pointing at all the food on the table, including the few pieces of chicken that Jonathan had burned because he was too busy making out with Nancy, telling you all to finally ‘dig in’.

The conversations flow easily between everyone and it feels familiar despite being new to this circle.

And while you and Steve don’t really talk to each other, you feel his eyes on you every once in a while. You feel his arm brushing against yours, his hands grazing your knuckles whenever he reaches for his drink – and every slightest touch shoots electricity through your veins and your heart beats a little faster every time his skin touches yours.

You curse at yourself for feeling so weak for him, for almost crumbling after only these small and very innocent touches, for liking someone who spent most of his life hating you.

You spend the rest of the night avoiding him, trying to lean away, trying to look at anyone but at him. And even then, you can still feel his eyes on you and it’s driving you crazy and you suddenly can’t wait to get away from him so you can finally breathe and stop feeling so delusional – his comment, his touches, his glances are all getting too much. If he was someone else, you would think that he was flirting but he is Steve Harrington for god's sake, and he would never flirt, not with you.

You feel relief rushing through your whole body when hours later, Eddie announces that he is going home, you almost jump up and bolt towards the door but your best friend seems to have other plans.

With his hands on your shoulder and an apologetic smile on his face, he opens his mouth, “Buckley is driving my car tonight, I wouldn’t want to put you in danger, sorry sweets, you’re with Harrington tonight. Don’t worry, you’ll be in good hands.” He winks and pinches your cheek before he scurries away.

Robin follows him, winking at you as she walks out with Eddie’s car keys, and the teens following her.

Max gives you a sheepish smile, mouthing a ‘sorry’ before she walks out, as well, leaving you standing in the hallway.

What the hell.

You have been waiting to get away from him, now you’re forced to drive home with Steve? No. Just the thought of being alone with him makes you feel nervous.

You look around the empty hallway, you already said your goodbyes to everyone and no one will care how or who you went home with. You can just walk home… by yourself, and you won’t have to suffer through another car ride with Steve.

But as you reach for the knob, the sound of keys jingling stops you from opening the door. You close your eyes, clenching your jaw. You don’t have to look to know who it is.

“Running away from me?” Steve asks.

You look over your shoulder, meeting his eyes and the smirk on his face. Hazel eyes glowing beneath the dim lights.

“Come on, Blondie,” he murmurs, eyeing you up and down as he steps up behind you, placing his hand over yours so he can open the door.

His hand touches yours. His hand envelopes yours fully. His chest is almost pressed against your back. Your heart flutters and your knees almost buckle for real, this time.

His lip twitches and he licks them as he looks down at you.

You tear your eyes away from him when he opens the door. You quickly step out and breathe in the fresh night air, hoping that it will calm your racing heart.

“I-I didn’t know you’d be my ride tonight.”

Steve watches the way your dress sways as you walk down the porch steps. Fuck. He clears his throat, but feels unable to look away as he follows you. You don’t even look back at him, not until you’re standing next to his car and giving him a very annoyed look.

“Is that a problem for you?”

“Maybe.”

He shakes his head with a chuckle as he unlocks his car.

“Get your ass in the car, Blondie.”

Steve doesn’t know what it is about you today, but everything you do, everything you say drives him crazy. That cheeky smile that you throw at him as you open the door, the way you tilt your head as you lick your upper lip before you say “yes, sir.” Has him clenching his jaw.

He looks up into the night sky, taking a deep breath before he gets in the car.

He tries not to look at you, but it’s hard not to when he for some reason feels some sort of electric pull towards you tonight.

He starts the car and pulls out of the driveway without another word.

Neither of you speak on the drive home but Steve can’t help but steal glances, while you are completely unaware of it, just like you’re unaware of how much your dress rode up, not enough to reveal too much but enough to make him sweat.

Steve is under your spell tonight and you don’t even know it.

The drive to your house is too short for his liking and unlike him, who seems to be eager to spend more time with you tonight, you seem like you can’t wait to jump out of the car and get away from him.

You open the door, mumbling a ‘thanks for the ride.’

“You know, I really didn’t think that you could dress like that, Blondie.” He says, intending those words to sound… flirty.

A laugh falls from your lips because of how absurd this is. He didn’t think you looked cute, he probably thinks you dress too feminine for the attitude you have towards him, that’s all. This new kind of teasing is hurting you, but you can’t say anything about it to him, you can’t say that this hurts you, that it’s making you go insane. He would ask why, and you would have no excuse. You can’t face rejection, at least not right now… So you play along.

“Careful, Lego head. You’ll give me the wrong idea and make me think that you have a crush on me or something,” you joke with words he said to you not too long ago. You throw a wink at him and shut the door before he can even open his mouth to say something.

With his hand on the steering wheel and his eyes still stuck on you, he breathes heavily, his heart pounding and his cheeks burning as he slowly comes down from whatever high he had been on all day.

He swallows harshly, but his heart fucking flutters when he can smell your perfume that still lingers.

He watches you disappear into your house and shutting the door without giving him another glance or something.

He slumps back in his seat, throwing his hand into his hair, he runs his fingers through it as all the events come rushing to him.

The teasing, the touches, the… flirting.

Steve is stunned by his own actions, by how he acted towards you today – something that you were very unaware of, something that he is now glad about… Yet, he can’t help but feel a little disappointed that you didn’t notice the teasing.

He doesn’t even know where it all came from but he blames it on his desperation to feel something again, something that he had been craving for so long.

He was guided by lust, not by interest.

Because in no way, would he ever be interested in you.

All he saw today was a pretty girl in a pretty dress, it didn’t matter that it was you. He just needed to feel something, and he did… by teasing you.

But it’s something that will never happen again.

He swears, it will never happen again.

♡

tagging friends and mutuals

@prettyboyeddiemunson @taintedcigs @mysticmunson @wroteclassicaly @maroon-cardigan @munsonlore @munson-mjstan @sherrylyn628 @ibellcipem

I'm sorry if I forgot anyone again (I'm the worst at taglists)

#steve harrington #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington fanfic #steve harrington angst #steve harrington fluff #stranger things angst

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sparklingself · 5 months ago

Text

𝐈𝐓 𝐈𝐒 𝐒𝐈𝐌𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐍 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐆𝐇𝐓

daily reflections #1

Are you trying too hard? I fear I've been struggling with this. I've noticed some things come so easy to me, but the things that I really really want I struggle with. The desire is so big, it feels so big, it's hard to detach from the physical realisation part. I get anxious and feel like all of my happiness depends on getting and I try so hard to get, that I forget to be. This is what over-complication looks like.

This is what Neville tells us in "The Power of Awareness" chapter 14:

Your journey from one state of consciousness to another is a psychological one; so to make the journey, you must employ the psychological equivalent of "Least Action" and the psychological equivalent is mere assumption.

Least Action means minimum effort (minimum amount of energy * minimum amount of time). This is a concept which you see in all physics - states are occupied through minimum effort. I don't like to "prove" LOA through science, but I think it's an analogy you might appreciate. Particles and larger phenomena strive for minimum effort. And so should you.

It is mere assumption which you should focus on. Your attention on the assumption is all you need, nothing else. Your desire already exists, because creation is finished. You're not conjuring up anything new, you're not changing your world for that matter, you're changing your assumptions.

For the Lord seeth not as a man seeth, for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart. 1 Samuel 16:7

Your outward appearances might be telling you one thing, however it is but the tiniest facet of reality. Looking on the heart means looking at your assumptions. And that is what determines what you physically experience.

Everything comes down to this present moment. Your assumptions are your present moment, your past, your future - everything is in this present moment. It is everything. Forget anything else and focus on this present moment.

Be still (least action) and know that you are that which you desire to be.

It is time to be. Stop daydreaming (thinking ABOUT not thinking OF) about the potential future and start being. So, say "yes" to yourself. Say "yes" to the state. Be still and know it is done.

---

By the seventh day God had finished the work he had been doing; so on the seventh day he rested from all his work. Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done. Genesis 2:2-3

I know the Bible app posted this today, because it's Sunday, but this ties in well with the art of assumption. You have assumed. Now it's time to rest. Remember, least action, minimum effort. Know it is done. And the world has no choice but to conform now.

It is not complicated. Just choose a scene that makes you happy and feel it. Feel it to truly be yours in this present moment.

#loa #loassumption #law of assumption #neville goddard #mental diet #self concept #living in the end #affirm and persist #law of attraction #manifestation #manifesting #law of abundance #law of manifestation #manifest #edward art #spirituality #void state #meditation

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ironunderstands · 5 months ago

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I decided to take notes while I played through 2.3… so here they are

First Scene

-stellaron sealed when we were asleep apparently

-was Sunday the one to tailor everyone’s dreams?

-dreamscape itself exists???

-march’s memories are weird as normal, tentacle tried to reach into her brain but found SOMETHING???

-we were asleep when this all happened and we woke up and immediately asked if it was a dream so something is already up oh boy

Second Scene

-firefly and silverwolf yay

-firefly is still on the wanted list, as Firefly this time

-it was a missing part of her life she got back

-Silverwolf helps her out with not being able to move freely, giving her a way out of dreaming ig??? Helps her navigate through unbothered ?

-idk the mechanics of it if you can’t tell

-Miss Samuel as a fake name lmao

-GENIUS SOCIETY IS HERE?? WHYYY?? HUHHH

-firefly’s script isn’t over yet (third death I assume?)

-“didn’t bring you back to hear an answer like that,” did SW think she already experienced the third death? On her second death was SW the one to revive her, as it seemed like she did that on her own in 2.2?

-yeah she hasn’t done 3rd death yet, and I assume the “unforgettable reward,” is *sighs* time with the Trailblazer

-“How will I know if I don’t try?” Hmmm this confuses me

-SW says she’s already made up her mind

-ooh Kafka asks for some gifts LMAOO, fashionable as always

-to Oti mall I guess, isn’t that one of the people who expressed disappointment in Sunday?

-BLADE ADVICE? telling her to not get tempted, tempted by what?

-YAY SHE GETS NORMAL GIRL TIME THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I WANTED

-oat cakes for SW or Kafka or Blade? Aww Stellaron Hunter family bonding

-oh is she trying to defy the script?

-adding new footnotes to her destiny, hmm

Third Scene

-TOPAZ POV

-I DIED OMGNDNAKDJKWJDD

-were are on the Radiant Felddpar ship

-Family is there but “Big Boss” isn’t, I assume that’s Jade

-there’s music notes in the air? Robin?

-Topaz points out how weird this choice of location is

-ship belongs to Alfalfa Family

-npc we are talking to also thinks it should have been held in a more secretive area (Moment of Morning Dew)

-not serious enough atmosphere

-something’s up definitely

-Topaz thinks conference is just a prelude- whatever Family organizer wanted to assess the IPC’s stance beforehand

-she thinks they either have their own ambitions and want a preliminary agreement, or want to make the IPC back off, we shall see ig

-Big Boss is a her (definitely Jade), Topaz complimented, saying others must be cautious of her

-tells subordinate Thomas to just tell the rest of her employees to stay focused on the task ahead

-yeah it’s Jade, act shocked, also she’d get mad if he called her that 😭😭

-walking around time

-there is music all around the ship

-not very important but there are paper birds here too

-none of the important figures have arrived to the meeting room yet, so let’s look around

This is just from looking around:

-why are there dream pools on the ship? I thought we were already in the dream?

-the torment eagle things are here too

-and nightingale paintings

-Sparkles bombs, delightful

-why is there a room on the ship that looks like Mishas room in the dream

-it seems like the Family is already aware of the bombs and is looking for them based on the dialogue of the NPCs

-there’s a lost kid on the ship?

-so many doors are closed off

-absurdist clock fun

-the quest is titled “All About Eve” like Eve from the Bible? Is that referring to Jade?

-exhibit that hasn’t been delivered yet

-Robin has instructed them to prepare some things but it seems like the Family isn’t ready yet?

Ok I’m gonna talk to the workers now

-ok talked to the one by Sparkles bombs and Sparkle started talking

-Numby can hear her I think, I don’t think Topaz did

-yeah Topaz doesn’t know they are bombs that Sparkle hands out, apparently she was disguised as man- maybe Sampo?, uh no all the Buttons are in one place

-somehow nobody pressed a button, I don’t believe that, the NPC also says that all guests are terrified of death, but like, how did nobody press it?

-yep we are in the dream bc she wants to feed Numby and questions the food quality in a dream

-Numby does not like Oat Cake Rolls

-Topaz will give them a better meal in reality

-so why is there a dreamscape pool in the dream

-asks more about Radiant Feldspar, which is also owned by Oti Alfalfa, just like the store Firefly wanted to go to

-built an Amber Era ago, it sails across all 12 hours- so they are connected you just have to cross them I guess? Or like does it slip through dimensions

-Topaz recognizes Old Oti, however what’s weird is that despite how she points out how well decorated it is, there seems to be a lot of stuff missing + Robin thing from earlier

-only prestigious guests are invited, so how did that Pepeshi get lost?

-Ship had been sailing since it was built but was halted due to the recent reverberation

-reverberation aka whatever the fuck just happened in 2.2

-Family attendant repeats that everything has been resolved and the Charmony Festival had to be temporarily postponed

-so it’s gonna happen on the ship now, and will also resume the ships voyage, so I guess that’s why Robin ordered some things and everything is a bit out of place

-However, why are they gathering Sparkles Bombs onto the celebration + meeting ship? Why not anywhere else?

-Talent Motivation Department mention

-ppl still coming after Topaz for Jarilo I will kill them <3

-poor girl can’t get a break, JADE IS HERE

CUTSCENE SO MUCH HAPPENED

-Numby does not trust or like Jade at all

-Topaz is fucking star struck on her knees dying down bad gay gay gay

-Jade commends her for the Jarilo project, saying the Express’s favor is far more valuable than the planet itself

-Jade says Topaz can tell her anything, then holds out her Cornerstone as if Topaz would talk to it???

-hmmm

-“you can always tell me anything, remember?” Ah so they are close, and Topaz seems to trust her and vice versa, however I (and Numby) do not trust Jade so there is something sinister going on

Alright cutscene yapping over

-Jade says to drop the title, that they are equals

-Topaz calls her a senior, but I think she just means in rank

-Jade wants Topaz to be at her best- upcoming negotiations leave no room for error

-true purpose of conference: Oti testing limits of 2 stonehearts before offical negotiations can commence, works in their favor bc it will cause future negotiations to go smoother if they can reach an agreement (this is obvious benefit)

-hidden benefit: demonstrates the Family isn’t all that united bc he’s meeting w them first on his own territory + taking control of Charmony Festival too

-they aren’t entirely influenced by the Harmony so their personal desires shine through, influential figures haven’t suppressed their own

-with the Dreammaster gone, the Family has begun to fall apart slowly, seems like after 2.2 Oti took over

-Jade taught her to Listen, test and strike, Jade teases her that she changed the order on Jarilo- Topaz’s personal experience caused this (her seeing her past/trauma in Belabog)

-meeting time!

-meeting esteemed “supporting actor” hmm

-goal is to create an opportunity for IPC to enter Penacony- Aventurine made a small hole for them to enter, and they are going to tear it wide open

Some more looking around

-the bombs/buttons are gone 😨 and so is that guard

-was there a projector in that room (with the dream pool) before?

-diff family attendant at that spot before

Ok back to plot time

-oh this is the place where the divergent universe takes place (I started it a bit yesterday lol, oops), seems like that’s what the Genius Society will get a hold of at the end of this?

-Oti is a Pepeshi, and I really like his character model, he seems welcoming?

Looking around time again

-the mechanism they use for the Divergent Universe is already there- did Ratio and Screwllum meet with Oti beforehand? Is that how he figured out Dormancy?

-some more locked doors

-Whales outside the window.. (Childe flashbacks)

-let’s talk to Jade before we see Oti

-oh we can’t it just makes us walk beside her

Conversation time

-Oti is hospitable, asks them to forgive him for the wait

-Oti is such a businessman that the Strategic Investment Department makes it a requirement to read his biography

-she’s trying to flatter him but I think Jade is also warning him that she and the rest of the department know everything about him and who he is

-Topaz doesn’t seem to notice that though and praises him for single handedly building Penacony economy

-Oti noticed Jade’s tactics I think

-he gets straight to the point- future of Penacony

-Oti questions wtf Aventurine was doing and why 😭, almost getting killed and for what?

-oh he figured them out LMAOO, yup that was for an opportunity

-haha Jade says “fuck he figured us out” nicely

-she puts the pressure back on him, asking Oti how he would respond

-he first admires her composure at being called out

-“Oti won’t sit idly by when faced with a greedy wolf,” is he referring to the IPC, Aventurine or both?

-offscreen negotiation

-seems he said something that offended Topaz and Jade, Jade says she’s all ears

-Oti says he requested this meeting to dissuade the SID from trying to lay a finger on Penacony

-asks them to back off before they lose face in the future

-Topaz points out their fuck ups- Aventurine almost getting murdered and the Charmony Festival fuck up, that there are plenty of real issues plaguing the area

-Oti says they need to be more creative in the land of dreams

-“My actions will help Penacony take a significant step forward by “self-listing” and going public!” What does that mean

-Jade asks if he’s gonna bypass the IPC and go public on a universal scale (still don’t know what that means)

-rather than letting the IPC take hold, he’s gonna open the sweet dream to everyone in the universe- which is worded REALLY sinister if you ask me- is he gonna try and make everyone in it dream?

-he redirects and says that from today, anyone can become a shareholder in the Land of Dreams, and that’s the Path of Harmony he chooses

-Oti was aware of the Oaks family’s entanglement with the Order, calls them blockheads who prevented this from happening sooner

-Oti is thankful that the “reverberation” (Sunday and Order’s downfall) has allowed for the obstacle between him and his reforms to be eliminated

-publicize their finances so the universe still has faith in them + the Family remains confident in its future

-neither Jade nor Topaz seem happy about this, seems like they don’t feel as if they are on equal footing

-Jade asks Oti if he’s being waiting for Penacony to regain the spotlight, so if the IPC does anything, their actions will be scrutinized by trillions of people

-asks them to consider their next moves carefully

-Jade suggests they conclude the first half of their conference, and that they will respond on the behalf of the IPC later

-he just tells them to take their time (Oti is confident he is in control)

Scene 4- Trailblazer POV

-seems that meeting has concluded as Dan Heng asks if the Alfalfa Family had a meeting with the IPC

-Aventurine told them that to “return the favor”

-I wonder what happened in the meantime to get us here

-Welt points out that Penacony hasn’t changed much since the prison era, suggests that Penacony would rather invite the IPC to the table- on the surface to cooperate- but in reality to secure their own survival

-which is why the Astral Express are now mediators, and Dan Heng doesn’t know who to stand behind

-Welt doesn’t trust the followers of the Harmony to be as innocent as they presume they are

-if either the Family or the IPC were to take control of Penacony, the efforts of the previous nameless to free it from that illusory hedonism would go to waste

-we were in a deep sleep apparently (uh oh)

-one of the dialogue options says that TB felt like they were in a really long dream

-another asks where Himeko is

-Welt says their adventure in Penacony is reaching its conclusion

-After Ena’s dream shattered, Montour System’s branch of the Family took control of the situation, most members of the Oak Family fell unconscious? But their lives weren’t in danger

-Gopher Wood, the previous Dreamaster was confirmed to be the mastermind behind everything, however we know that Sunday killed him. But didn’t he kill him in the dream? So how did gopher wood die in reality? Or did like, the power of the Order that Sunday must have used on him cause that, or did he step outside the dream to face Gopher, then go back in?

-Sunday will face a trial: the Family won’t disclose any further details

-public perceived incident as an attack by evil forces targeting the Charmony festival, believing the Family had failed to safeguard the sweet dream which eroded their credibility significantly

-at least it has the least impact? Even if it’s far from what really went down

-SIOBHAN IS BACK

-she says they will get over it

-“you don’t know who’s awake and who’s pretending to be asleep”- another ominous line

-gives them a toast

-trailblazer asks why she’s there again, Siobhan is just confused

-asks when they will leave Penacony

-Welt says they will stay a bit longer, just not too long

-she says this farewell is missing something

-“maybe a special drink to honor those who are not here” oh yeah Gallagher is gone GONE

-To the Nameless resting in peace… and to Gallagher, oh he’s so gone

Walking around time again

-everyone but Himeko is here

Ok taking this many notes is exhausting and is lowkey killing my enjoyment 😭 so I’ll just leave the REALLY important stuff from now on

-The Family claims the Oak Family used the stellaron to help sink everyone into Ena’s dream

-others had their own delusional dreams

-DH says the hidden dangers of the Order have always been within the Harmony, an issue that has persisted in the Family from the very beginning

-more awareness makes this complicated

-March has a button now too, says she was told the buttons will explode Penacony if pressed

-himeko’s been up to something lately she will tell us at the festival

-Siobhan gives us another drink, saying it will “bring back the flavors of Penacony” which makes me believe it will help us get back here somehow

-Welt is sure it will leave a lasting impression, hmmm

-she says if we happen to find Gallagher, to let him have a sip

Scene 5: Jade POV

-Oti is tricky but there is still hope

-Jade asked Topaz to make a phone call offscreen, presumably to the express who agreed

-talking in code

-Jade asks Topaz if she thinks Penacony is worth it

-Topaz says yes

-Jade questions if this project is too bland for her

-Topaz says she would be here if it weren’t for Aventurine

-Jade pointed out she entrusted him with a cornerstone, which is as precious as life itself to finish this gamble

-however Topaz points at out that Jade’s stone couldn’t have made it in without either of their cornerstones: and that the Jade stone allows Jade to see all desires that flow through the dreams to gain a bargaining chip in the negotiations: this must be the “harvest” Jade was referring to in 2.1, seems like this is her Cornerstone’s ability

-Perhaps that’s why she held it up earlier? To allow Topaz to vent her feelings into the Jade stone?

-Topaz actually staked her Topaz’s stone for Jade’s sake, not Aventurine’s

-Jade is greatful Aven is alive, saying it’s the best outcome, Topaz immediately says they have strayed off topic

-Jade says she will go alone, instructs Topaz to meet “honored guest”- likely the Nameless

-Jade spots Robin

-turns out we were actually in the previously locked off rooms in the back of where we met Oti, he’s still there, and he’s wearing glasses? Was he before? We can’t talk to him tho

-ah this also unlocked some more doors- it’s where the ship is captained, but the captains room is locked

-Robin is preparing for Charmony Festival

-Jade lies saying she’s on her way to meet Oti really she’s just here for info before meeting him

-Robins never met him, she says Alfalfa is respectable when it comes to business, but not necessarily in other respects

-Jade asks where Robin thinks Penacony is heading, Robin is hopeful, thinks Harmony needs new direction

-“no permanent allies or everlasting enemies,”

-2nd half of negotiations- no Topaz this time

-Jade is gonna be meaner bc Topaz isn’t here you go manipulative queen

-says Oti is not the only merchant who has seen the changes in the cosmic market over the past ten Amber Eras

-Jade declares that Penacony has no way of sidestepping the IPC and going public, that they can’t stop the IPC, the IPC will tear down and rebuild as they see fit

-tells Oti that if he doesn’t want to be a laughingstock and have everyone after him, he better drop his “pie-in-the-sky-plan” perhaps he was planning on using Sparkles bombs to take out the IPC ambassadors now that the protection of not being able to die in the dream is no longer there- or at least he has control over it

-Jade reminds him IPC controls more than half the news in the universe

-says trillions of customers will receive a, “The Family’s protection for Penacony has expired. Any mishaps in the Dreamscape could result in permanent brain death,” message from the IPC if Penacony decides to go public

-threatens to make his entire currency worthless with how many contingencies the IPC has, Jade is confident she can pull it off, even from Pier Point

-she promises that the IPC won’t jeopardize the interests of the Family heads under Oti’s leadership if he gives up the plan to go public

-they (IPC) want allies in Asdana, Jade says they can assist Penacony with financing, will acquire 30% equity shares from the Family, and in exchange will also help rebuild Penacony

-Oti thinks it’s too much, and worried about the future

-Jade happily says there are no guarentees- this is based on mutual respect- but the board of directors will consider the interests of the Family heads to some extent

-she points out this would be beneficial for the Family, and for him, if they both take a step back, also points out this will attract more customers like he wanted

-as the head of the Alfalfa family, Oti accepts, seeing no reason to refuse, but as THEIR (Xipe’s) chosen one, he still needs one final answer (hmmm this is an interesting detail)

-talks about the rise of Xipe and fall of Ena, he asks why the IPC seeks to collaborate with the Family (Harmony) rather than the Order, who is far closer in ideals (Preservation)

-Jade says it’s about credit, saying that through the Preservation, the IPC can perpetually ensure credits value, meaning they have no need for the Order, as they have made their own, with Qilpoths “credit” being the heart of everything

-Oti understands this will eventually lead to the IPC taking control over everything

-“this universe doesn’t need two types of Order” (Preservation and the Order)

-Oti says he’s convinced

-code words from before come back in (shit I should have written them down, it was poison something, sweet dew, and apple something, sweet dew shows up this time per Topaz’s invite)

-unsurprisingly, it’s one of the Nameless: Himeko

-Astral Express will be shareholders? Perhaps this is so they can guarantee the future the Nameless wanted like Welt mentioned

-IPC gets 30%, gives 5% to the express to “honor the sacrifices and contributions made by the former Nameless to the Land of the Dreams,” which is A) true B) the real honor is the express now having a foot in the door to prevent Penacony from being like it was before

-Himeko is a member for the board of directors- what board? One in the IPC, or for Penacony, the Family?

-crew agreed to assist in reconstruction of Penacony, and commit to bringing the dreams of Penacony to other worlds

-However, they really wish for the Harmony to not be distorted again, that tragedy must never occur again

-negotiations end, we (as Jade) will go to meet up w Topaz again

-Jade believes the family heads will soon realize the situation, and that Oti’s agreement didn’t just represent their agreement, but the followers of the Harmony in general (this last part is only implied though)

-Topaz says she will handle the arrangements for formal negotiations

-Jade allows her to- gives Topaz a sense of control OOOH THE MANIPULATIONNNNN

-Topaz is shocked bc big responsibility, but Jade interrupts

-she says that Aventurine initiated this case and Topaz was his project partner, but since he overplayed his hand (taking on a case he couldn’t handle on his own?) Jade got pushed to the forefront

-OOH MORE MANIPULATION, Jade says she came here to help Topaz sort out the toughest issues, saying “I trust you’ll be able to wrap things up quite nicely, little Jelena,”

-Topaz’s objections immediately get pushed aside bc of Jades words, and asks Jade to give Diamond her assurance

-Jade tells her to not worry, Diamond has always trusted them, and Jade will put in a good word for her, and Topaz will get her position (P45) back in no time

-Jade claims her business is done so she’s gonna indulge in her own little hobby (I’m scared)

-which is opening a Bonajade Exchange branch on this ship, whatever that is, Jade believes the guests on this ship had or a wealth of valuable treasures tho

-it’s a pawnshop, and Jade says she will leave, saying she’ll “see you around Topaz”

-Topaz has one more question, Jade gladly lets her ask, she asks about the dose of “bitter poison”, wondering how Jade got it (I’m guessing her Cornerstone), it wasn’t her cornerstone, a “lady concerned with the future of the Harmony” told her (maybe this is Robin? But it seems like that was their first meeting? Hmm)

-Jade says she agreed to help her with something later (which makes me think this was Sparkle now haha), and that they can deal with it after they leave Penacony

-“that’s what ‘investment’ is all about”- the seeds of opportunity have already been soon and Jade simply gives them a little bit of nourishment for them to take root, afterwards all they (her and Topaz) need to do is wait patiently

-like right now, and Jade’s final “guest” boarded the ship

I’m insane about this actually yall. TOPAZ CENTRIC STORY??? WHAT IF I DIED. Also I love the way Jade was written in this, they made her as manipulative as I wanted her to be, so yeah I love her THEY COMMITED TO THE BIT I PRAYED FOR TIMES LIKE THIS

Scene 6: Firefly POV

-she boards (rather sneaks onto) the ship, so I assume she’s Jade’s final guest

-oh she’s heading to the pawnshop that grants wishes (it’s definitely Jade’s), perhaps to get those gifts she wanted earlier, or defy her destiny like she wanted to earlier?

-hey those closed off areas are unlocked W

-she spots TB, Robin is also there

-there’s a nice banquet table for people in that room, we got a shot of it earlier during Topaz, Jade and Oti’s meeting, idk what line of dialogue it was for tho

-Firefly overhears Robin saying that she will, “present a gift to the Astral Express on behalf of The Family as a token of gratitude for the Nameless’ contributions to Penacony”, asking for the staff to help her w the arrangements

-Firefly then asks how to get to the pawnshop, yup it’s Jade’s spot, she gets the directions

-Silverwolf was gonna meet w the Genius Society? Why? Also apparently she mentioned Jade’s stuff earlier, I don’t remember that though, maybe I forgot to write it down

-we can look for the TB so I’m going to

-TB is being a dumbass as ever and Firefly is amused

-she wants to talk to us but Firefly wants to meet Jade first

-we can’t go over there even if we want to

-Jade made her exchange in the dream pool room for some reason

-asks Jade to call her Samuel

-Firefly says she wants to give up living, and that she’s willing to give up everything she has

-even Jade is gagged

-Firefly is like yup! Everything!

-Jade says she should turn around bc she’s not familiar with the term, “pawn” aka she’s betting quite literally EVERYTHING

-Jade says she doesn’t have anything of equal value to offer her

-Firefly is upset, says this shop must just be a marketing gimmick

-Jade says she will help Firefly understand what she means, telling her to go and talk to the other customers, when she understands what “pawn” really means

-we see the TB being stupid again, this time w Dan Heng tagging along

-again she plans on catching up w them later

-first person she meets, Stacy, finally won a gamble w the blessing of Lady Bonajade

-there also seems to be way more guests on the ship

-second person she meets, a Pepeshi named Dell, gets his crush named Dorothy to go out with him, implied that he wished for her to say yes

-ppl seem to be gossiping about a grey haired person, either Firefly or TB

-yup it’s TB

-someone has been hiding in the Moment of Sol in Penacony under a fake identity, proposing as a professor at Paperfold academy, apparently this intellatron (Walker) found him (idk who him is) with the help of an influential figure

-ah this is unimportant this was just the wishes of the third person

-Firefly still doesn’t get it, but their wishes did seem to come true

-Jade said it was just to show the exchange was genuine, how she shows how all three of them gave up so much in exchange for their wishes, so yeah, glorified drug dealer, but it is an equal exchange, and Jade only encourages these people’s delusions, giving with the power of her Cornerstone for a hefty price

-uses their endless cycle of desires to get what Jade desires from their whirlpool of horrific decision making

-Jade knows Firefly’s identity, and she asks Firefly if she’s really willing to give up everything, Firefly isn’t surprised though

-Entropy Loss Syndrome was thrust upon all of the Iron Calvary in order to keep them fighting for Glamoth, and from falling into the wrong hands

-Firmament Front is gone so those who know the secret and could cure the disease are nowhere to be found, but Firefly still wishes to continue her existence

-Firefly asks if the IPC has a remedy

-Jade just says there might be a silver lining and leaves it at that

-Firefly realizes that she can’t provide anything of equal value bc nothing she owns has any meaning

-asks Jade if she’s gonna ask her to restrain the other Stellaron Hunters for her survival

-that’s not the case though, Jade acknowledges how remarkable close the Stellaron Hunters are, compares them to the Stonehearts, OOOHH LORE DROP

-Jade says like how the Stoneheart follow Diamond, the Stellaron Hunters are, “Traveling on the Path of Finality but struggling against your destiny, attempting to move in the opposite direction?”

-Firefly remains silent

-Jade hopes all of them will visit her pawnshop one day

-Firefly asks if she can see this as an invitation from Diamond to the Stellaron hunters behind the IPC’s back

-Jade says to consider it a person offer, not representing the IPC or SID

-Firefly says she will pass on the offer, but she has a question

-Firefly points out that SW could let the entirety of Pier Point know of this in seconds, so why would Jade ask this

-Jade says it’s because she believes her and Firefly are the same

OH MY GOD STONEHEART PICTURE

-she believes the Stonehearts band together to get what they want, and have been invited by Diamond to join them whilst on their own journeys

-Jade says all stonehearts carry a void (ambition) that can only be filled from the outside

-also omg Topaz and Aven look GOOOODD GRERRAAAA TOPAZ LOOOS SO FINE EEJFHJEJAKSKWS RAAAAA AVENNNNNNTURJEJNWKAND AAAA

-so Diamond promised them something, he divided the power of the Emanator of Preservation into ten pieces (for the ten stonehearts) and gave each of us a Cornerstone to fill that void

-“Mortal flesh is fragile, yet my heart is unyielding like the monolith. For without this resolve, the way of the Preservation would fade into oblivion.”

-Jade says this pledge goes beyond a mere oath, it’s their collateral in exchange for the Stonehearts desires, and their future

-whatever they gain from it will make the Stonehearts stronger, allowing them to achieve the great cause of the Preservation (what Diamond wants) when the war among the Aeons eventually comes (HUHH WHAT NOWW I MEAN WERE GETTING THEIR GOALS AT LEAST?!!)

-Jade tells Firefly to take her time

-Firefly says she will, and says it’s shame that the pawnshop won’t give her what she wants, as her last attempt (death?) will end with “hope”

-Walker comes to give her his memories

Scene 7: Trailblazer

-he points out how the meeting went smoother than expected

-Charmony festival opening ceremony is starting soon

-AVENTURINE AND BOOTHILL?!!?

-Boothill threatening Aven jokingly but not jokingly, Aven brushes it off

-seems like they came to an agreement off screen

-he notices us + typical flattery, Boothill gives a normal greeting

-Aventurine admits his words are nothing more than flattery and not genuine (at least due to the option I picked)

-Boothill says to set aside the under the table stuff as to not spoil the mood

-Aven gives congratulations bc he can’t be there personally (he’s a hologram) to witness the crew getting celebrated

-Aven says his job was just to give the IPC an opening, which he achieved (even if it was a mess

-Aven says he wouldn’t have been able to dig up such dirty information without the help of a “knowledgeable friend” HMMM IS THAT RATIO???

-Acheron still fucked him up though, and he admits this would have gone smoother had she not injured him

-we thank Boothill, he’s like it’s nothing I’m a galaxy ranger it’s part of our duty, he’s happy Galaxy Rangers are making a comeback and asks the TB to pass on his regards to any Hunt followers he meets

-BOOTHILL STRAIGHT UP ADMITS THAT AVENTURINE IS GONNA HELP HIM FIND OSWALDO SCHNEIDER WHO HE HAS A SCORE TO SETTLE WITH??? HE ADMITS THAT!!? HUHHH, I mean he did say he’s not one to beat around the bush but still

-Aventurine also talks about the feud between the Marketing Development Department (Oswaldo) and Strategic Investment Department (Diamond) is fairly well on wok, but he didn’t expect the Galaxy Rangers to get involved

-he thinks things are gonna get spicy

-I wonder if the IPC knows about this deal between him and Boothill, I doubt it though, and I think Aven might be hiding this from everyone

-this reminds me that he was deliberately acting like he hadn’t grown around Jade during their conversation in 2.2, which makes me think he’s planning to do something beyond just whatever he is gonna do with Boothill, or at the very least Aven wants to make things easier for himself by acting as if Penacony didnt change him

-they wish the TB well, Avens hologram disappears

RATIO.

EVERYONE PAUSSEEE

-he’s standing where the now activated Divergent Universe thing is AAAA

-it’s all over the screen/hj

-OK CALM DOWN BE SERIOUS

-OFF THE BAT TSUNDERE - “your performance at Herta’s space station was… adequate, I suppose,” thats high praise coming from you hehehhehe

-“Hm, no wonder the gambler likes you so much.” HUHHH??! Can’t keep AVENS NAME OUT UR DAMN MOUTH FOR MORE THAN 5 SECONDS??? We didn’t even bring him up

-“This individual is my responsibility during the trip. Hmph, nothing more than an errand from the Office of Academic Affairs,” the who of what now? Not the “hmph” and downplaying

-tells the Trailblazer to take advantage of the opportunity the Charmony Festival provides

-TB asks Ratio how he rates Aventurine, Ratio says that the IPC and Guild position them as strategic partners; but Ratio sees himself as a teacher, and like everyone in Ratio’s life, Aventurine as a student, Aven isn’t an ideal student, but not utterly obtuse. He remarks that the void inside of him (which could be referring to either the one mentioned as being filled by the Stonehearts or just Aven’s general lack of a will to live) cannot be filled by talent and knowledge. Ratio hopes he doesn’t turn into a philosophical zombie. Which I like that up, and it’s basically someone who behaves like a person but does not have a conscious experience. What I think Ratio is suggesting is that what Aventurine is missing isn’t talent or knowledge, but genuine connections with other people, goals, desires, a purpose, things that aren’t so material

-TB teases Ratio, saying they thought he would make them get their act together, Ratio says that saying such a thing means we haven’t grasped the essence of learning, OH MY GOD HE SAYS EXACLTY HOW I BELIEVE HIM TO VIEW KNOWLEDGE SOMEONE SEDATE ME

“Acquiring knowledge aims to enhance living” I KNOW THIS IS A SIMPLE LINE BUT ITS LIKE AT THE CORE OF RATIOS PHILOSOPHY, HE WANTS TO SPREAD KNOWLEDGE TO HELP OTHERS GROW AND PICK THEMSELVES UP

oh my god, that’s why Aventurine isnt his typical student, to improve Aventurine’s life, he DOESNT need knowledge or talent, so Ratio has to try other methods…

Forgive me for the person I’m about to become I fear

-we say good by to him 😭😭😭😭

-“I detest noisy gatherings, as they intrude upon my thoughts.. What a waste of time” AUTISM!! BRO IS OVERSTIMULATED LEAAVE GO ELSEWHERE WHY ARE YOU HERE UR CLEARLY HAVING A BAD TIMEEEE

Alright bye Ratio onto the next one

-TOPAZ AND NUMBY??!?

-Topaz eco ship mention??

-ooh we ask her about her Cornerstone and if she can transform herself like Aven

-her ability isn’t as “visual”? So it’s not a transformation

-LORE DROP; abilities of Ten Stonehearts are all different, some can even read thoughts and grasp desires (Jade), she warns us to be careful

-Topaz is greatful for the timing in Belabog bc it let her and Bronya be friends

-Jade convo next!

-I picked Sundays name and she went “not a bad name, just lacking in virtue,”

-she does her deal shtick, I’m gonna ask to revive Akivili

-poor girl is dumbfounded, but she accepts 😭

-she asks for the tail of an animal and I think she asks for the tail of the cat in the stellaron hunters 😭

-sorry Akivili you aren’t returning

-ARGENTI

-his lines aren’t voiced unfortunately

-he’s talking about the beauty as always, saying we are already walking that path due to our virtue

-apparently if an admirer of Beauty gets lost in the pursuit of power, they risk descending into “the Omen of Evil” a form that’s neither human nor beast

-he compares this to Sunday; whose actions argenti believes were no different from the Omen of Evil, and that he lost his way along the path of righteousness

-he wasn’t there at the final battle because Ena’s dream was too realistic and he couldn’t bid farewell to a fallen friend who had turned into a beast, so Argenti stayed within the dream for a while

-he blames himself for not passing the trial of Beauty this time, and for hesitating, wishing to become more determined that ever

-him and Sunday competing for who has more religous trauma LMAOO

Alright I’m done talking let’s wait for the opening now

-Firefly is here!

-we go over how wack the plot has been

-she asks if we will be leaving again

-I picked the idk option and Firefly says not to worry bc we are on the path of the Trailblaze

-Elio told Firefly that her journey will tell her how to live on and the rest is up for her to find out, and she will hunt for leads everywhere, including Penacony

-TB says that no wonder she was investigating the Watchmaker, but even if she didn’t get what she wanted, Firefly says she get a deal from Jade

-we warn her not to make deals w the IPC bc they are shady

-Firefly is like no dw I didn’t do anything stupid or get anyone involved

-she apologies for lying to us earlier about being from the Iris Family

-I accept it bc I’m not a cunt but I’m glad they allow you to turn her down

-OOH FIREFLY’S STRUGGLE AT EXPRESSING HER EMOTIONS YESS HOYOVERSE THIS IS WHAT I WANTED GRRRRR

-uh oh bloodhound family is here

-Firefly is sad and like “I guess we have to say our goodbyes”

-but she’s hopeful bc her “script” hasn’t ended yet- so they will meet again

-TB is worried but figures she will be fine, we decide to check on her later after we attend the festival

-we get a message from Firefly, saying she handled everything but she’s sad she won’t get to see Robin perform

-Ceremony begins and Robin shows up

-March is fangirling

-Robin is eating as always

-she’s like “yeah this has been crazy but hey we’re doing it now!”

-thanks Oti Alfalfa for his dedication

-she’s like thank god it’s over

-oh she brings up the Watchmaker

-she gives a tribute to Misha/ Mikhal Char Legwork for laying the foundations of Penacony

-thanks him for allowing the Dreamscape to exist, that Penacony’s success is rooted in the Trailblaze that the Watchmaker brought with him and only by honoring that spirit can harmony be spread

-everything is back on track, and Penacony’s family give the Nameless a token of appreciation

-They give the ship to the Astral Express?!!? That’s a fun one, I think Robin pulled some strings for that one to screw over Oti for throwing Sunday under the bus

-she toasts the Harmony, the Trailblaze, the future of Penacony and the universe, and the generous Alfalfa Family Head, Mr. Oti Alfalfa

CUTSCENE TIME

-Oti is amused by Robins cunning

-he’s SPARKLE TIME

-she put a bomb in the ship and we got 10 minutes to find it oh boy

Cutscene over

-she gave us a map at least

-HASTIEST GROUP CHAT IN EXISTENCE TO FIX THIS

-LMAOO

-this is great it’s bomb hunting time

-because the hounds are stupid and gathered everything spending 48 system hours to press all her buttons

-it’s hidden among 999 dolls and the challenge is to find where the real one is hidden

-Robin asks everyone not to panic and that they will prepare for evacuating

-however the Oak Family has relied on the power of the Order for the guarantee that you can’t die in dreams, but since the Order’s blessings are lost, this bomb might actually kill people

-everyone agrees to help

-Aventurine isn’t taking it seriously likely because he isn’t actually there, he’s like “Wanna bet who will survive this?” and Ratio’s like “k” bc he’s done w Aven’s shit and higher priorities

-Black Swan finds 131 fake bombs, area gets evacuated

-Boothill finds 217 of them with the help of the hounds and Ratio wearing his alabaster head, nobodies found it yet but nobody seems too concerned

-Argenti finds 145 bombs but again, duds

-IPC found 329, but again, nothing

-last one is in the cockpit

-Sparkle rickrolls us

-it’s a bomb

-they found the remaining dolls but nothing

-Sparkle gives the coordinates of the last, true bomb, and everyone agrees to gather there

-TB finds Firefly standing by Sparkle’s bomb

-Sweet Dream no longer has the Order’s protection and if it were to blow up there could be bad consequences

-she says the design is unique and as if it’s been locked by some mysterious Path force

-nobody knows how to deactivate it

-Firefly doesn’t think anybody there can fix it

-she says Black Swan might be able to teleport it, but Firefly found a note inside the doll

-a note that’s complete nonsense and says it contains a virus very dangerous to Memetic entities like BS plus a bunch of Bananas for some reason? It’s all very unserious

-Firefly reminds us that she has three “deaths” in the Land of Dreams

-so this is the third time

-we’re like nah ur not dying

-Firefly says she’s not in the dream like normal people, she has a Stellaron Hunters special method (Silver Wolf) that let her to be in here , and it lets Firefly perform feats others can’t

-as long as she can bear the pain of the memoria pressure, she will be able to dive into the primal Memory Zone and extend a lifeline to the Radiant Feldspar

-she’s gonna try and take it into the depths of the Dreamscape (Primordial Memory Zone) so nobody will get hurt

-Firefly tells us not to worry and that SAM will allow her to get back safely if she lucky

-determined to give this story a happy ending

-Firefly reminds us of Acheron’s words, “The so-called impossible is merely something that has yet to happen..”

-the moment that could disprove the “impossibilities” hasn’t arrived yet

-Firefly has so many choices to make before her “death” in whatever form it takes, and she believes that when the moment arrives for us to make a choice, the answer to our end will already be in our hearts

-“it is not destiny that shapes us, but we who shape destiny,”

CUTSCENE

Compare astral express and stellaron hunters like light and shadow and tied together

-OH BOY SO MUCH HAPPENS

-Sparkle detonates the bomb early but it’s actually fireworks

-she then bops us off the edge of the ship but Firefly catches and saves us

-it’s really cute tbh

-she reaffirms what we said, both that destiny is ours to choose and that the reason why life slumbers is because one day we will wake up

-there’s a little procession of scenes of everyone so far

-highlights being Ratio leaving and Boothill pulling out a gun due to Argentis yapping

-and Aven reminiscing in the place where he found himself again

-we also get a little peak at what Acheron is doing

-she put three flowers on the graves of the Nameless, officially saying by to them

Cutscene over

Scene 8; Acheron (although still from TB perspective)

-child wanted to put flowers down for the Nameless? I don’t really understand her first line in this

-oh the child is Mikhail and the flowers are for the other two Nameless, and when he’s gone someone placed one for him

-she says “your wishes will always be remembered by someone,” likely talking not just to Mikhail, but the audience

-Now Penacony has finally welcomed the dawn after the long dark night, even if the path ahead won’t be easy

-“Tiernan, you can now go home”

-the Nameless are also preparing for our next stop

-we say goodbye to the old Nameless, Gallagher and Acheron

-“in the Land of the Dreams, anything is indeed possible,” - March

-“History may not remember the names of the dead, but the stars will attest to their journeys, the first glimmer of light in the prolonged night often illuminates little, as it is fleeting and the darkness too vast. But because of this, people will remember: As long as something shines in the night sky, then when the first star falls.. countless more will follow, streaking across the horizon.” - Dan Heng, I loved his speech so I had to write it

-they give a toast to the fallen Nameless

-“A toast to history that no longer remains silent, the passionate and courage’s pursuit, and a voyage that traverses the stars,”- Dan Heng ur COOKING

-we can talk to Acheron, and she calls it a fitting end to our story

-we say bye to Gallagher, who we don’t even know if he was a “living person”, callback to the 13 thing, an “enigmatic” character for sure

-at least our journey and his love for Penacony was real

-we toast him too, and using the drink that Siobhan made for him

-“to all lies, and the singular truth,”- March

-she also asks him to not speak in riddles if they ever meet again

-we say bye to Micah, Welt apologizes for only now speaking to him, Welt asks what the people of Dreamflux Reef do now, many will continue to live there, and “those accustomed to being away will mostly have a hard time getting used to a life of darkness with their eyes closed,” Micah will also watch over the primal Memory Zone as the Order has faded

-“Penacony’s nights are long, and there are many who are still far from a good nights sleep,”

-they still manage without the Sweet Dream

-toast to the ppl in Dreamflux Reef and their tenacity

-we finally say goodbye to Mikhail, it started from the moment we met him and it ends by saying goodbye to him

-“just like a clock’s hands that turn round and round, the start and end of each day will always land on twelve o’clock- the advent of time moving forward,” - Himeko, it really is over isn’t it, honestly I wonder now is just what that dream pool and projector were for

-the entire adventure started bc of Mikhail and it’s ending because of him

-“And then, a new page will be turned.”

-“To Penacony’s past, present, future… and the child’s unwavering dream unto death,”- Himeko

—“the Trailblaze can illuminate the way, but ultimately, the future of a world belongs to those who live in it,” - Dan Heng, just like Belabog and the Luofu huh

-March has a strange feeling that she had a few stops ago that’s really strong this time, she talks about how many stories these three Nameless have experienced, and she compares them to the current Nameless and their own adventures, and that they lived the “every day” we do now

-but it’s all in the past, and TB says to her that we should live in the present, but that’s what March can’t get out of her mind

-she’s upset at that the Nameless then didn’t get their happy ending, but the TB now shouldn’t live through them, however since us (especially March) has witnessed their lives, their are special to us now, so she hopes their story gets a good ending when it comes

-but what if those Nameless and us now aren’t special, and we won’t get a good ending?

-if Mikhail might not have had no regrets, how can we know we won’t?

-“Then, what is this regret we feel in our hearts right now…?”

-Himeko assured that all of them are searching for the answer to this question, that against the backdrop of a cosmos, our lives are fleeting

-however, even if the universe doesn’t remember the never ending Trailblaze, but people, and those who travel along the silver rail themselves will

-“As long as we remember, their stories (The Trailblaze) will never end,” OH MY GOD THIS MIRRORS WHAT BS SAID IN THE ONE TRAILER WHERE WE WILL CARRY OUR WISHES TO COUNTLESS STARS AAAA

-Mikhail answered this question himself, dying with a smile on his face even after his complicated life

-its meaning will be interpreted by those who come after us

-it’s not the answer that’s important, but what we can learn from others answers

-“This is what Trailblazing is”

-March tells DH to tell a dad joke to lighten the mood

-he won’t

-it’s never a bad thing to reflect

-we got a long way ahead of us WHOOO

-so it’s time to tell PomPom what we saw

-then prepare for the next stop

-time to say final goodbye to Acheron

-she asks if we remember our first meeting

-we reminded her of an acquaintance

-because of the Self-Annihilators curse, what she thought was a familiar meeting was merely an illusion, attributing her feelings of that old friend to us the TB

-however you can ask if it wasn’t an illusion

-Acheron says it’s improbable we ever met before, and there’s nothing left to retrace but Nihility

-I can keep pushing

-she doubles down, said this me and your memory of her aren’t the same person

Red Text oh my god

-“But some things will never change,”

-she just laughs in response

-oh my god she’s talking about her past companions oh no her Kiana her Bronya noooooo NOOOOOOOOOO

-they didn’t achieve the outcome they wanted, but our sheer stupidity makes it feel like they never even left

-she talks about how things can seem so similar yet so different

-Acheron has wandered alone, encountering “acquaintances” who’s silhouettes overlap with her past

-she asks us what we think her “Deja vu” means

-im going with “the wish to return to the past”

-she says all of our possible answers are incomplete

-it’s something that’s not external, but something that’s within us, an emotion spanning across time from a certain moment in our past to reach us

-every time we reminisce, we notice both the tiny but unforgettable things we leave behind, and the other things that remain constant throughout

-that’s the summary of our lives, the proof of our shared path

-within those small moments, those tiny regrets, we glimpse our own essence, and truly “exist”

-Acheron says to “set forth on your voyage without hesitation, Nameless, on the path of the Trailblaze”

-even if our ending has been predetermined (OOH CALLBACK TO 2.1 and 2.2 AAA) there are countless things humans cannot change

-but before that, there are still many things we can do

SHES WORD FOR WORD REPEATING THINGS

-“And because of this, the “end” will thus reveal a completely different meaning”

-“this is the meaning of ‘journey’”

I AM INSANE ABOUT THIS ACTUALLY AAAAAAAAA

THE CALLBAKCS THE REFERNEFES I WAS RIGHT I WAS RIGHT FUCK ALL OF YOU I LOVR YOU ACHERONNNN

-“all those things, beautiful before, are still do now. And I believe… It will still bloom at the end of the Nihility, until we meet again beneath the sun’s rays,” OH MY GOD SHE HAS HER HORNS AND OLD OUTFIT SHES SO BEAUTIFUL

AND WE ARE GONNA MEET AGAIN AT THE END OF THE STORY AAAAAAAA

Back at the Express

-Pom Pom is crying

-Dan and March bickering

-Pom-Pom started crying over the adventure, March has never seen them so sad before

-now they are angry

-we caused so much chaos and threw the time-table off and if we keep acting like this the Express is gonna run out of fuel

-well not really they are just masking their sadness

-we take a break in the next car while Himeko comforts Pom Pom

-we chat a bit, those three Nameless must have meant a lot to them

-we don’t know shit about Pom Pom’s past lmao, but their emotions haven’t become dulled by the grind of time, and they still value every journey

-we might actually run out of fuel bc due to our existence Pom Pom has had to delay the warp jump schedule

-the express converts every “Trailblaze” into the energy it needs to run, like a perpetual motion machine

-we are using up fuel much faster than expected, and can only pull off two more warp jumps at most

-which means we must consider our next destination carefully

-the two worlds nearest to us are the oceanic planet of Lushaka and the Agate World Melustanin

-we still need to vote

-BLACK SWAN SHOWS UP

-Welts like ‘alright give us the juice’

-she overheard how the express obtains fuel

-her suggestion could be the lifeline that saves everyone

-OH ITS THE DH = DF LINES YESS

-“those mired memories of yours”

-if the express needs a special trailblazing expedition to recharge its engine, then they should go to a world that even Akivili never even reached, and the express will never have to worry about energy again

-March is like “is that possible?!!”

-a world many don’t even know exists, hidden away by outside observation, only revealed by the light from the monitor of the Garden of Recollection

-fettered by three Paths, its destiny hanging in the balance

-“The Eternal Land, Amphoreus”

NO THIS IS CRAZY THIS IS CRAZY BECAUSE THAT IS RATIOS HOMELAND SO HOW DID HE GET OUT FROM THERE, A PLACE NOT EVEN AKAVILI HAS BEEN ?!:!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAA

JADE SCENE?!!

YOOOOO

-she calls Sunday a child

-it seems like he tried to escape and got caught

-he thinks he’s gonna die

-his fate is entirely in Jade’s hands

-he wants the pretenses to be over and to just have time to talk

-she’s glad he’s still a cunt

-she came to fulfill Robin’s wishes, to offer a trade if he’s willing to accept

-she talks about his oath between him and Robin of building a haven where everyone can attain peace

-she asks if he would be willing to speak to her if there was a chance to fulfill that vow

-Jade sets him free, tells him to see the world for himself

-Sunday doesn’t want to accept it though

-however the trade is still up, and Jade is willing the wait for his answer

-she gives him a word of warning

-“Life is too short to miss out on golden opportunities”

And it’s over

Wow that was great

OK! I will definitely not be doing this again because oh my god this made the quest take like 10 hours (most of the time was just typing it tbh 😭) made it far less fun than it could have been, however it also really helped me understand what was going on a lot; and I’ll look back on this if I want to remember the plot in 2.3

Overall I think it’s a really satisfying conclusion for Penacony, and any of the things I thought were weird kinda dissipated because they are minor nitpicks at best, and we did say Penacony would have to figure itself out from here

if you somehow decided to read all of these, I admire your patience lmao, and I hope you enjoyed all of the parts in which I started absolutely losing it

I recommend you don’t do this lmao, it’s more fun to just play through and look at the wiki later imo, maybe take more overarching ones after you have already completed a scene? This was certainly a learning experience at least

#hsr #honkai star rail #dr ratio #aventurine #jade hsr #topaz hsr #boothill #argenti #firefly hsr #caelus #stelle #2.3 spoilers #this was definitely a decision I made #Hey at least it will be nice to look back on #I hope this somehow ends up being helpful LMAOO

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firstelevens · 3 months ago

Note

🃏

🃏 Are you joking right now?

For the first time in months, Sam is grateful to be going back to an empty house. Most days, the little cottage on the water feels over-large and echoing with just Sam to occupy it. Today, his ears are ringing enough from the fight and the exhaustion that he's not sure he'd be able to catch it if he tried.

He shoulders open the door and winces at the pressure on a fresh bruise, locking up behind himself as he sets the wingpack down and arms the security system with a few taps.

The lights are on and a tupperware from Sarah's is sitting on the kitchen island, and Sam takes a moment to be thankful for his sister when he sees it. He's not sure he has the energy to call for takeout, much less cook anything.

Still out of it, Sam stumbles to his bedroom and braces himself before whipping his shirt over his head, swearing quietly as the motion tweaks nearly every hurt muscle on his side. Pants are easier, and he kicks the sweats in the general direction of the hamper, because if he bends down to grab them, he's not sure he'll be able to get back up again.

He doesn't know whose idea it was for him to become Captain America in his forties, but he wants to fight them. He will, too, just as soon as his entire body stops feeling like one giant bruise.

The door to the linen closet isn't quite closed--he must have bumped the handle on his way past and forgotten--so Sam just has to nudge it open and pull out a towel. He's surprised when his fingers brush over one of the plush, fancy ones that he'd splashed out on when they first moved in. He'd been certain that they were all in the laundry, and Sam had been called out for this mission right in the middle of a Sunday that was supposed to be for doing laundry and cleaning the house.

He decides not to question it, his feet already carrying him back to the bedroom, where he opens the door to the bathroom and stands at the threshold for a solid thirty seconds before his brain finally processes that something's wrong. He clocks all the signs in the wrong order: first the humidity, then the surprising warmth of the usually-chilled tile, then the sound of the shower running behind the curtain.

"Shit," he hears himself say.

Half a second and an undignified yelp later, Bucky's head is poking out from behind the shower curtain. "Sam?!"

It takes Bucky's eyes going wide and then pointedly glancing away for Sam to remember that he's not dressed, and the mortification sharpens his senses enough for him to blurt an apology and scurry out of the bathroom with his towel in hand, slamming the door shut behind him before he scrambles for the nearest set of sweatpants--folded in the laundry basket on the bed, Sam belatedly realizes. He's beginning to think that it's a miracle he survived the drive home.

Sam doesn't know how long he's been sitting on the bed and stewing in exhaustion and embarrassment when he hears the shower turn off. The door opens to admit Bucky a moment later, his hair damp and his sweatpants sitting low on his hips. Sam is fairly certain that it's a pair that Bucky stole from him.

There's another apology halfway out of Sam's mouth, but it gets cut off by Bucky gasping.

"Christ, sweetheart," he says, his eyes wide. "What the hell happened?"

"It's nothing," says Sam. He's too tired to recount it, and he's not sure details would help anyway.

Bucky makes an unimpressed face. "Samuel."

"What?"

"Are you joking right now? This is nothing? Sam, you're 90% bruise. Who did this? How'd your team let it happen?"

But Sam is tired, and everything hurts, and he can't take an indignant Bucky right now. Not when they haven't seen each other properly in months, not when there's so much left to say between them.

"They let it happen because we're a man down," Sam snaps. "Because my partner fucked off to work for a woman neither of us can stand, and nobody else knows how to watch my six like he did. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to take a shower."

Sam goes to stand, but Bucky puts a hand on the one part of his chest that isn't bruised and gently pushes back. "No you're not."

He sighs. "I don't have time for this, Buck; I'm barely awake."

"I know," says Bucky. "Wait there."

He doesn't have it in him to argue, so he stays put as Bucky turns and heads back into the bathroom, bending over by the faucet and fussing with the water for a moment before Sam hears a metallic click and the rush of water accumulating in the tub.

Sam flops back onto the bed, unable to support himself for much longer, and listens to the sound of a drawer opening and closing, of the scrape of epsom salts against the scoop that they use to measure them out. There's a splash as they're added to the water, and then the citrus tang of that fancy bath oil that Sam had gotten for Christmas and never used.

It's a little while longer before the water turns off, and then Bucky is back in Sam's field of vision, peering down at him with a tenderness that makes something squeeze in Sam's chest.

"What?" Sam makes himself ask, as irritably as he can muster. "Am I allowed into my own bathroom now?"

Bucky holds out a hand to help him up, which Sam bats at but then takes anyway.

"Just so you know," Sam says, "a bath isn't going to fix everything."

"I know," says Bucky. "But you're in pain, and it'll fix that."

"I'm still gonna be mad at you when I'm not in pain," says Sam, because otherwise he's going to do something stupid like hug Bucky.

"Good," Bucky says, pulling the bathroom door mostly shut. Sam thinks about pushing it all the way closed, then reasons that leaving it ajar will at least alert Bucky if Sam falls asleep and almost drowns. "The anger will keep you awake so you don't drown before dinner."

"Who says I'm eating dinner with you?" Sam calls out. He steps into the bath and the heat of the water feels so good on his aching muscles that he lets out a dreamy sigh before he can stop himself.

"Just a hunch," says Bucky. "What better way to chew me out than to wait until I have a mouthful of food and can't talk back?"

Sam tips his head back against the tile, eyes closed. "You might have a point."

"It's been known to happen," Bucky says. He's quiet for a moment, long and drawn out for how silent the rest of the house is. "Hey, Sam?"

"Hm?"

"I missed you."

And maybe it's the distance, or the late hour, or the way that the persistent ache in Sam's heart finally eased up at the sight of Bucky's face, but some stubborn part of Sam just gives out.

"Hey, Buck?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you going to get in here with me, or what?"

What follows is the sound of a door banging open, a supersoldier tripping over his own feet, and a pair of sweatpants being flung with such enthusiasm that they almost took out a bedside lamp. It takes some renegotiation of limbs and a not-inconsiderable amount of splashing, but soon Sam's back is pressed against Bucky's warm chest, his legs framing Sam's torso.

"M'still mad at you," says Sam, as he lets Bucky pull him closer.

"You can be mad, sweetheart," murmurs Bucky, absently rubbing the ache out of Sam's right shoulder. "I'm sticking around for you to be mad at."

"Okay," says Sam, pressing his face into the hollow of Bucky's throat to hide his smile. "Okay, Bucky."

Bucky's lips brush over Sam's temple, gone as quickly as they appeared. "Okay, sweetheart."

#sambucky #'hey zainab what's their relationship status here'#must a relationship have status. is it not enough for there to be love in every room of the house.#(that's code for I thought I knew but then I decided it would be better if they weren't quite sure either)#zainab does ask meme things #my fic #anonymous

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downtherabbitholewithlucy · 8 months ago

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👹The Bass Beast Unleashed👹

#looks like he's playing from the fiery pits of hell #also Rome NY July 1999 #I can't stop watching the way he ticks in the 2nd gif or the way his fingers effortlessly move on that bass #also the way his eyebrows arch the fuck up in the 1st gif as he screams into the mic like he's gonna eat it #FUCK👏🏻IT👏🏻UP👏🏻SAM👏🏻#Sam Rivers #Limp Bizkit #nu metal #SAM. I. AM.#Sammy Boy #Bass Boss #Catch me simpin' for Samuel on Sam Rivers Sunday #down the rabbit hole

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thatchickwithtoomanyhobbies · 1 month ago

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Home Again (Zussman)

*****Basically Zussman after he finally comes home. A lot of Zussman and his baby sister. Note: I’m an only child of a single mom so sorry for any inaccuracies when it comes to family dynamics.*****

Home. Finally home. Finally back where he belongs. It was 7:00 on a Sunday morning- the perfect day to get home.

“Leah’s probably still asleep,” he thought to himself, smiling at the thought of his ten year old sister. His parents knew he was coming home and would be up already making family breakfast- a Sunday morning tradition they’d had since he was a kid.

As the car rolled up the the house he could see his parents- Samuel and Margaret Zussman- standing in the driveway with their arms linked.

“Thanks for the ride, College,” he said, grabbing his bag out of the backseat and climbing out of the car.

“Not a problem, Zussman,” Stiles replied with a slight smile. “I’m just glad you finally made it back safe.”

He paused walking up the driveway, waving to Stiles as he pulled away, then laughed when he almost hit his neighbor’s mailbox. There was a reason Turner and Pierson never let him drive the jeeps.

“What a horrible driver that boy is,” his father said with a chuckle. “It’s good to have you back, son”

“Good to be back, Pops,” Zussman replied embracing his father for the first time in over a year. “Hello, Ma.” He continued with a chuckle as his mother shoved his father away for a chance to hug him.

“Oh, my baby! I was so worried about you!” She said, smothering the poor man with kisses. “Look at you! You’re so skinny!”

“Yeah, Ma. That’s what happens when you only get a measly crust of bread once a day. If that.” He replied with an uncomfortable smile. He was still coming to terms with the fact that he had almost died in a labor camp.

“Go inside. I obviously need to make more food for you, Robbie.” She said as she turned and went inside the house. “That poor boy. He turns sideways and he almost disappears.” She muttered to herself as she closed the door.

“Leah’s still asleep if you want to go surprise her. We didn’t tell her you were coming home.” His father said, turning and and walk with him towards the house.

“Yeah, I figured she’d still be knocked out. Neither of us are exactly morning people.” Zuss said cracking a smile. For being nearly thirteen years younger than him, he and his baby sister had way more in common than most people would think. Sure, some of that could be chalked up to genetics- a subject he had shut down Stiles on once in the tent while everyone was trying to sleep- but that certainly didn’t explain all of it.

“She missed you so much while you were gone, you know.” His father said, running a hand through his greying beard. He looked so much older than when he’d left. “She’s slept in your room every night since you left. Something about feeling close to you I’d imagine.”

“Poor kid. I missed her. I’m gonna go see her.” He said rushing ahead of his father and upstairs to his childhood bedroom.

“Don’t mind me! I’ll just pretend I’m wallpaper.” His father said with a laugh. It felt right having his family under one roof again.

Zuss gently eased the door to his bedroom open. He could see his baby sister sprawled out on her back in his bed with one foot up on the wall- something he also had the habit of doing.

The teddy bear he’d given her at the train station before he left was tucked under her arm, an eye now replaced with a small green button, the same shade as his. Her long brown curls were a tangled mess on the pillow. He smiled knowing that after breakfast she’d probably have him braiding it while she told him all about what happened when he was gone.

“Leah. Leah, baby. Scoot over,” He said smiling and stroking a rogue curl away from her face. “Honey, scoot over, I wanna get in my bed.”

“Five more minutes, daddy.” She said, rolling over to face the wall still half asleep. That certainly hadn’t changed. That kid could sleep through a circus cannon- something else they both had in common that had gotten him in trouble with Pierson on numerous occasions.

“Ok, since you’re not moving for me, I’m gonna move you.” He said picking her and putting her closer to the wall. Somehow that still didn’t wake her up, not that it surprised him any. He laid down in the edge of the bed, being sure to give her enough space to flop around the way she usually did as she slept.

A slight smile crossed his face as he watched her sleep. It was a month before his twelfth birthday his parents told him he was going to have a baby sibling and he hadn’t liked the idea one bit. He liked having all his parents’ attention and not having to share it with someone else. Then the day he held her -Leah Josephine Zussman- in his arms for the first time he fell in love with her, sound asleep wrapped in a pink blanket his mother had crocheted. To him she looked the same now, asleep in his bed tangled up in his plaid blanket, as she did the day she was born.

She rolled over, now facing the side of the bed he was on, eyes slightly cracked open.

“Hey, kiddo. Nice of you to join the land of the living,” he said smiling at her. She was obviously confused. Trying to figure out if she was still dreaming or if that really was her big brother and favorite person in the world laying there.

“Robbie?” She asked, a hint of uncertainty in her voice. She had to still be dreaming.

“Hi, baby girl.” She was finally starting to realize that she was, in fact, not imagining that he laying on the edge of what was supposed to be his bed.

“Robbie!” She squealed excitedly, tackling Zuss off the bed and onto the floor, knocking the wind out of him in the process. “Robbie! You’re home! You’re home! You’re really home!” Her excited squeals filled the room around them. “I thought you’d never come home.” Her excited squealing now being replaced by happy tears.

“Of course I’d come home, LJ.” He said as he tried to sit up against the side of the bed. “How could I leave and not come back to the prettiest girl in the world?” He stroked her hair as she buried her face in his neck and squeezed him with all of her ten-year-old strength. Oh, how he had missed her hugs. Although right now this one was cutting off his airflow, not that he was gonna tell her that.

He felt the tears pricking his eyes as he held her. He’d never admit to it, but that little girl was his best friend. He thought of her so often. Even more so after encountering Erika and Anna in the hotel and Erika’s death at the hands of the German Forces. What would this little girl had done had their parents had to tell her he had died?

Right before his platoon had found him and the German soldier had a gun pointed at his head, his last thoughts had been of his baby sister. How would she gone on without, as she called him, her best friend and favorite person in the world? Who would braid her hair back at night before bed so it wouldn’t become as tangled as it usually did? Who would take her to the park and push her on the swings? Who would teach her how to drive a car and not crash into the garbage cans while parking in front of Mr.Patel’s grocery store? Sure his parents would’ve done all these things with her, but he’d much rather be there to watch her grow up than dead somewhere in a foreign land.

A tear escaped his eye and rolled down his cheek as he pulled the small girl closer to him. He didn’t need to think about that anymore. He was back in Chicago where he belonged. He felt like he could finally breathe again.

Suddenly, he heard his mother’s footsteps stomping up the stairs- a sound he didn’t even realize he’d missed while he was away.

“Well, it seems you two have had a touching reunion!” his mother said, wiping her hands on her apron and smiling at her children seated on the floor. “Come on now! Breakfast is ready!” she continued, turning and going back down the stairs.

“You ready to go eat, LJ?” Zuss asked, standing up and placing his sister back on the floor.

“I call dibs on the pancakes!” Leah yelled over her shoulder as she raced out of the room and downstairs to the kitchen.

“Not if I get there first!” He said with a laugh, chasing after her, slipping and almost falling on the landing. How good it felt to finally be home again.

*****So that’s that. Sorry if it’s terrible. Also let me know if you want something like this for the other guys.*****

#cod #cod ww2 #cod wwii #drew stiles #frank aiello #joseph turner #red daniels #robert zussman #william pierson #call of duty #call of duty ww2 #call of duty wwii #cod fanfic #cod fandom #call of duty fanfic #call of duty fandom

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overdevelopedglasses · 1 month ago

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OC-tober Day 1 - Favorite OC

Man, this is a tough one. A lot of my original characters are my favorites for one reason or another, but I'll limit myself to 3 of them here. 2 are from my personal project and 1 that... my mutuals should be able to guess :3

Lily Carnell: the protagonist of Essence. She learns to lead, learns to stand up for herself, and grows into the role of "hero." Her story is definitely a "chosen one" story, but I dig a bit more into everything that comes with that moniker, like expectations and the like.

Samuel Taore: I HAVE BARELY TALKED ABOUT HIM AND THAT'S A FUCKING CRIME. He's the antagonist of Essence! If you saw that Sunday Six post a while back, he was the POV character! Surprise! Either way, I torture him a lot but ugh he's so funnnnn. Me when people have good intentions but really shitty ways of making them a realty <3

Atarsu Shinumi: yeahhhhhh we saw this coming gang. I love this guy! The first OC of his kind to kinda... cement himself in a story. Like, I'd imagine my own characters in stories, but not to this extent. Not when he bends the canon to his will. I need to write more of him, I love him.

#bweirdoctober #i love all of my OCs dearly #think of this like. a special shoutout #O.Dev's Essence #<- the tag is smthn like that right?#or is it without the period? eh. we'll figure it out #shinumi my boy shinumi

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neverwanttofallasleep · 1 year ago

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I Never Want To Fall Asleep - Chapter 8 (Part 1)

Word count: 7,299

For pairings, warnings, and disclaimer - see Masterpost

Sunday, December 25th, 2022

Frankenmuth, Michigan

Karen greets you and Josh at the door with warm hugs as you all exchange Merry Christmases. She doesn’t ask you where you’ve been, and she’s just as gracious as the minute you arrived. You’re relieved.

As he walks under the threshold, Sammy gets a smack on the back of the head.

“You could’ve at least sent me a text message, Samuel! I was so worried when I didn’t see your car this morning!”

Sam winces. “Mom! I knew Josh would tell you. And I’m here now.”

She huffs. “Breakfast is almost ready. Take your coats off and go sit at the table.” You all go to comply, but she pulls Josh aside.

“Go and wake up your brother, baby.”

You feel your stomach turn. You know Jake is awake, he just texted you. He just hasn’t come out of his room yet.

Josh nods, removes his coat, and heads upstairs.

You take off your scarf and hang it over Sam’s coat by the door. You’re just left wearing Jake’s sweater over your clothes. You suddenly feel very exposed.

You follow Sammy into the dining room, where Kai and Ronnie are sitting at opposite sides of the table, showing each other TikToks.

“‘Morning, family.” Sam greets them.

“Merry Christmas!” Ronnie jumps up and hugs you both. You’re definitely starting to feel more comfortable with her now, despite the circumstances.

“Happy Christmas, guys.” Kai smiles at you both.

“Happy Christmas, Kai.” You return. You move to take the empty seat by him, opposite from Ronnie, and you give him a kiss on the cheek. “I never got to tell you how fucking delicious that thing you made the other night was. You have to give me the recipe.”

He laughs. “My mom would be happy to hear that! I’ll text it to you.” You exchange numbers.

You hear creaking on the stairs, and sure enough, Josh makes his way into the dining room. Jake is a few steps behind him. When he sees you, he gives you a meek smile, and leans against the door frame, watching his family banter.

He looks like he’s in surprisingly better shape than he was last night, though the circles under his eyes are a dead giveaway. His long hair is pulled back into a low bun, a few pieces loose around his face. He’s wearing a black linen shirt, mostly unbuttoned, and almost matching trousers. His Atocha pendant is hanging around his neck. You’re a pair, both dressed in black. You may as well be going to a funeral. He’s definitely not dressed appropriately for the weather, but he never is.

Sam gets up to give his brother a hug, and whispers in his ear. About you, you’re sure. Sam rubs Jake’s arm as he goes back to his seat next to Ronnie.

Josh comes over to give Kai a kiss, glancing at where you’re sat, and then goes back to sit down on Ronnie’s other side, opposite Kai. This leaves three free seats for Jake and his parents. The one at each end of the table, and the one next you. You curse internally. It’s almost like his siblings are orchestrating this.

They might be, for all you know. They’ve got no idea how hard you actually rejected Jake last night.

Karen and Kelly come bustling in with plates of food and pots of coffee. You remember Jake telling you that the Kiszkas always had a traditional Polish breakfast of apple pancakes on Christmas.

“Something Dad’s family always did. He makes them the best. It’s the only time Mom will let him near the kitchen, y’know, unless it’s to wash the dishes.” He’d told you.

Karen has supplemented the spread with some kind of fluffy scones and jam, fresh fruit and scrambled eggs. It all looks and smells delicious.

“Happy Christmas, my babies.” Karen coos. “Go on, dig in.” She gestures to the plates and cups and you all move to fill your plates at once. She looks to Jake. “Grab the milk and cream for me, will you, sweetheart?” He nods and heads into the kitchen, as his parents take their respective seats at the heads of the table.

Everyone begins to eat and chatter as Jake returns, placing the jugs on the table next his mother before making his way ‘round to sit by you. He pulls the chair out and silently raises his eyebrow as if to ask your permission. You give a small nod and he sits. It’s not like you have a choice.

Sam clears his throat to get the table’s attention.

“So,” He clasps his hands in front of himself, very much like Josh does. “What’s on the agenda for today, then, momma?”

“Well, honey, it’s up to you guys, really. But I was thinking we do presents after breakfast,” the Kiszka kids giggle excitedly at this, “and then I thought I might put Ronnie and you, Sammy, on dishes duty.” They nod. “Kai and Josh might be kind enough to get some more firewood from the shed, and Jake and Y/N can help me set the table and get lunch started? I think after breakfast, we probably won’t eat till late, maybe 2 or 3 o’clock. So you’ll all get some time to hang out in between, maybe we can watch White Christmas?” You remember Jake telling you that this was Karen’s tradition. She loves old movies and musicals, and she always watched White Christmas with her sisters growing up.

There’s a chorus of nods and hums of agreement around the room. You see Jake’s fist clench on his thigh, his knuckles whitening. You swallow. You’re sure Karen isn’t doing this with ill intention. If anything, you imagine she thinks she’s being kind, however misguided it might be.

“What about Dad?” Ronnie pipes up.

Karen smirks, and Kelly clears his throat. “I made the pancakes, Ron. And I’m on Santa duty. After all that, I reckon I’ll need a nap.”

You all giggle.

Karen shakes her head, laughing. “I’m sending your dad out to shovel the driveway. He’ll be plenty busy, don’t you worry.”

Ronnie looks satisfied with this.

Sam looks happy with this plan, too, until he remembers something. “What about the Christmas concert?”

Karen beams, but Josh groans. “Aren’t we too old for that? Mom and Dad and Ron have seen us play arena shows, do we really need to bash out terrible Christmas songs in the garage? I need vocal rest.”

Everyone laughs.

“C’mon, love. I want to hear you sing.” Kai looks at Josh with the most adoring expression, it almost makes you feel a bit sick. Josh immediately blushes and takes Kai’s hand across the table.

“Well, okay. For you, anything.”

Kai turns to Karen and gives her an over-exaggerated wink. She giggles.

“It’s not a Kiszka Christmas without some music.” She smiles broadly.

Sam nudges Ronnie. “Besides, one of us has yet to play an arena show. Reckon you can keep up, sis?”

She rolls her eyes. “I can sing Christmas carol circles around you idiots. You’d better watch out, or I’ll be the one in the jumpsuit come January.” She pokes Sam in the ribs with her pointer finger, and he winces. “Jake and I look enough like twins, no one’ll be able to tell the difference.”

Sammy chuckles and smacks her away. “Hear that, Josh? She’s coming for your gig.”

“Not unless she plans to sing ‘Jingle Bells’ in Las Vegas, she’s not.” Josh retorts, poking his tongue out at his sister. She flips him off.

Sam gestures to you and Kai. “You two are in for a real treat.”

You giggle. “Can’t wait.”

“Me neither.” Kai nods enthusiastically.

Jake has been quiet throughout breakfast. When you glance over at him, you see that Karen has her hand resting on his on the table, rubbing circles with her thumb.

She knows.

You feel a different kind of guilt bubbling up in you. You’ve hurt him, you know that. He’s hurt you, too. But you have all the power now. You know how you feel about him, and if he feels anything remotely close, sitting right next to you under the circumstances would have to be painful.

You have to resist the urge to reach under the table and place your hand on his thigh, like he’d often to for you if you were anxious or sad. Despite your treatment of him last night, you still want to comfort him. You hate being the reason he might be having a shitty time today.

When breakfast wraps up, you all begin to stack your plates and clear the table. Karen waves you all off. “We’ll do it after. Everyone in the living room in ten minutes for presents!”

Jake is the first to get up, quickly disappearing upstairs. When you can, you make an escape to the downstairs bathroom, pulling out your phone.

10.04am You: If I’m trying to enjoy it, you have to, too.

You don’t wait for a reply.

You leave the bathroom and wander to the kitchen, finding Karen refilling the coffee filter.

“Can I give you a hand?” You ask.

She looks up at you. “That would be great, honey. Can you grab the mugs from the table and bring them in here to rinse?”

You nod, and follow her instructions.

When you’re back in the kitchen, rinsing and stacking the mugs next to the sink, Karen breaks the silence.

“Are you alright, sweetheart? We missed you, the last few days.”

You decide to bite the bullet. “Yeah, I’m good. I’m so sorry I left so suddenly, I didn’t mean to take advantage of your hospitality like that. Jake and I just had a bit of a disagreement, and I felt like it would be better if I had my own place to stay for a few days.“

She hums. “I’m sorry to hear it. Jake’s been all out of sorts since you left. Sammy, being the gossip that he is, told me that he and Lily had ended things. I think I’m beginning to understand why.” She gives you a knowing look from the corner of her eye as she turns on the coffee pot.

Your cheeks bloom. What were you supposed to say to that? Anything that wouldn’t make you sound like a home wrecker.

“It’s complicated, I think. He’s my best friend.”

She nods. “I know, honey. And that’s usually the best foundation for a relationship.”

You feel tears pricking in your eyes. You’ve cried more in the past few days than you can ever remember crying in your life. “Are you upset with him?”

She looks up at you. “What for?”

“About Lily.”

“Of course not. Why would I be? I love her like a daughter, and she’ll always feel like family. But sometimes love just runs its course. They were just kids when they met, they didn’t know what they were getting themselves into. Most people have many loves in their lifetime, some stronger than others. It’s rare, when it’s real. And you’ll know if it is. If you find it, you gotta hold onto it. Don’t let it go.”

You nod. “Thank you, Karen.”

She gives you a smile so warm it almost hurts. “You’re welcome, Y/N. And I’m glad my boys have been looking after you, while Jake couldn’t.”

You smile back. “Me too.”

She takes the pot and heads out to the living room.

You follow her with the stack of clean cups and put them down on the coffee table. You turn to grab your purse from the hooks by the door, and head back in to take a seat on the ottoman, next to the Christmas tree. You’re hoping to avoid any further awkward seating arrangements.

You fish through your bag for your gifts, bundling them up under your seat to keep them out of sight. Just like Danny’s, none are wrapped, so you’ll have to give them out as is. You sigh.

Everyone filters in after a few more minutes, taking their seats around the living room. Kelly sits in the recliner, a Santa hat on his head. You giggle.

Jake returns, too, and heads straight for the record player. He puts on a Christmas album, and it’s very quiet, but after a few bars, you make it out to be Rosemary Clooney.

Karen grins from her perch on the arm of Kelly’s chair. “Thank you, baby.” She nods to Jake.

He gives her a warm smile, the most you’ve seen from him all morning.

You let out a deep breath. He’s trying.

Once he’s sitting down, on the couch next to Josh, you peek a glance at him. He looks just as gorgeous as ever. His eyes are lacking that signature sparkle, but he’s smiling, so that’s a start. You can’t help but look at his lips. The lips that were on yours last night, in such a frenzy that he’d left you a little swollen today. The memory is not as painful to relive as you were worried it might be. It’s actually kind of nice, and you find yourself wondering what would’ve happened if you hadn’t called it off.

You see him lick his lips absently, and you’re instantly transported to the night before, reliving the feeling of his tongue on you. You shiver.

You’re broken from your confusing daydream by Kelly. “Alright, then. Ho, ho, ho. Who wants to go first?”

Everyone laughs, and Josh puts his hand up. “Me, Santa! I want to go first.”

“Okay, then, Joshua. Give Santa your presents and I’ll hand them out for you.”

Josh gets up, and Ronnie cackles. Everyone looks at her. “Dad, if you’re gonna make us all get up to get our gifts, isn’t it easier if we just give them out ourselves?”

Kelly thinks it over for a second, then he nods. “Yeah. You’re all too old for this now. Give out your own presents.”

Karen laughs and shoves his shoulder. “Kelly.” She scolds.

Josh begins to hunt through the pile under the tree for his gifts, and hands them out one by one, starting with his parents.

Sam nudges your leg from his spot on the floor. “Be thankful it’s not Oliver Reed’s year to give out the presents. Those are much more exhausting.” He snickers.

“Oi, Samuel. Don’t you be talking any shit about ol’ Oliver. Be grateful that you get to have the privilege of his presence.” Jake puts on his terrible British accent, and in spite of yourself, you giggle.

Jake looks at you, surprised. Then, much to your own surprise, he smiles, and winks.

You feel yourself blushing, and you quickly look away, diverting your attention to Ronnie, who’s now opening her present from Josh.

“Wow! An Eiffel Tower keychain! Just what I’ve always wanted!” She sticks her tongue out at him.

“Shut up, Ronnie. Look underneath it.”

She pulls out a gorgeous French silk scarf, and gives him a genuine grin. “Thank you. It’s beautiful.”

“I am a man of many talents, and one of them is having impeccable taste.” He retorts, as she gets up to give him a kiss on the cheek.

Josh gifts you a large piece of fabric, on it a reproduction of a black and white Italian lino-print, which you’d seen in a gallery together on one of your days off. You tell him it’s too much, but he waves you off.

“I knew I had to get it for you when I saw it. Was gonna give it to you when we got back to New York. You’d better make something beautiful with it.” He tells you.

Your gift from Karen (and Kelly) is a framed postcard of the Frankenmuth Memorial Park Rose Garden, a beautiful image of a bed of pale pink and white flowers.

“So you can put it up at home and think of here.” She smiles at you. You feel like you might cry again.

More gifts are exchanged, and as if in silent synchronization, you and Jake get up at the same time to pour the coffees and pass them around. More than once he makes eye contact with you, and you find yourself feeling a little giddy under his gaze. This is not how you expected to feel today.

When it’s your turn, you retrieve your pile of presents from under the ottoman, and begin to hand them out to Jake’s family. You’re met with a chorus of ‘thank you’s and compliments on your talent. You blush, insisting that they’re just little things.

When you get to Sammy, you make him close his eyes and hold out his hands, like you did with Danny. He’s met with a red, knitted fisherman’s beanie, which you’re especially proud of. He gives you the biggest goofy grin and puts it on straight away, sitting up on his knees to give you a hug.

“I love it!” He exclaims, and you giggle. You didn’t expect any less enthusiasm from him.

Josh is next, and he gives you a soft smile as you hand him the narrow, white and gold scarf you made for him. He wraps it around his throat and tosses one end over his shoulder.

“How very Parisienne of you.” You giggle.

“I’m really embracing my inner European after the tour.” He smirks. “Thank you, Y/N. It’s gorgeous.”

You smile. “It suits you.”

You’ve saved Jake for last. Maybe out of fear, or maybe something else. You’re not sure now. You get up, and move to stand in front of him.

“Do I have to close my eyes, too?” He asks quietly.

His family begin to chatter around you, as if to disperse the tension. You’re relieved.

“Only if you want to.”

He does, and it’s different from when his brothers did it. It doesn’t feel silly. In fact, there’s something intimate about it.

You place the small gift into his outstretched hands. He opens his eyes, but instead of looking straight at the gift, he looks at you first. Your face warms, again.

When he does look down, he gives a smile so broad that it suddenly makes you feel embarrassed, like you shouldn’t have done this here. The gift itself isn’t extremely exciting, but seeing his reaction, it suddenly feels intensely personal.

He slides the black, fingerless gloves onto his hands, admiring them, before looking at you again.

“So I can play guitar in them?” He asks.

You nod shyly.

“They’re perfect.” He murmurs. “Thank you.” It’s so earnest.

You blush deeply, and quickly return to your seat. He takes the gloves off and places them neatly on the arm of the couch.

His family pretend to be oblivious to the interaction, which you’re immensely grateful for. Sammy can’t help himself, and gives you a sly look as you sit back down.

Sam’s next, and his gift to you is a beautiful robin’s egg blue mug, speckled with what looks like sand.

“Sam, this is gorgeous.”

He smirks. “It’s from me and Lennon. Her sister made it, you know how she’s got a pottery studio.”

You nod. “Thank you.”

The rest of his gifts to his family are all also handmade pottery, and you sense a theme.

“Did Lennon send you here with a suitcase full of breakable items?” Ronnie teases him. “She’s a brave girl. How much did you spend on bubble wrap?”

Sam puffs his chest. “Yes, she did. And I didn’t break a single one, thank you very much. Bubble wrap is very expensive.”

You all chuckle at him.

Jake gives out his presents last, and in the hustle and bustle, no one seems to notice that you don’t receive one. You’re not upset, you figure he either didn’t get you anything, or he decided not to give it to you after last night. Fair enough.

After everyone’s done with presents and you’ve all had your fill of coffee, you and Ronnie are left to wrapping paper pick-up duty, while the rest of the family starts on the chores Karen has assigned them.

You hold the trash bag while Ronnie picks up the paper and cards and dumps them in. You ask her to save the ribbons for you, so she lays them in a neat pile on the coffee table. You’re quiet for a few minutes as the others meander in and out of the room.

Once you’re alone, she speaks. So matter of factly, it takes you a second to catch up.

“Did it get too much?” She smirks, but she’s not making fun of you. She might as well have said ‘I told you so’, but you feel like you deserve that at this point.

“Yeah, I guess so. It’s complicated.”

“I bet. He’s been pining over you for the last three days. It’s been unbearable.”

You feel your face go red. “I’m sorry about that.”

“Don’t worry about it.” She smirks again, but this time you feel like you’re in on the joke. “You don’t have anything to be sorry for, Y/N. I don’t judge you, or him. I like you. And Jake is in love with you, I saw it on his face from the first moment he talked about you. I’m glad he and Lily have worked their shit out. First love rarely lasts forever, unless you’re our parents. Now you just gotta decide if you wanna be with him, too. ‘Cause he’ll do anything for you. He’s the best person, Y/N. Don’t hurt him.” She really is her mother’s daughter, but she has a bit of that Sammy spunk in her. Relentless, honest, protective. She’s a good sister.

“I know.” You say honestly. He is the best person.

She nods. “Good. Then I won’t say anything else about it.”

“Thanks, Ronnie.”

“It’s all good.” She smiles, not a smirk this time. A genuine, toothy smile. God, she looks like her brothers.

Preparations for lunch go by smoothly, and fast. You and Jake keep your interactions to a minimum while helping in the kitchen and setting the table, but when you do speak, or hand things to one another, you struggle to keep your chest from fluttering. You don’t know what could possibly feel so different from last night, but even being in his proximity today is enough to give you butterflies. It feels like a school girl crush, a single glance or brush of his hand is enough to make you swoon.

Once the food is in the oven, Karen dismisses you both and instructs you to put on the movie for her. The two of you sit on the couch while the others flit in and out, watching bits and singing along to the songs. You’re not sitting right next to each other, but you’re not on opposite ends, either. There’s maybe a foot of space between you, and you can feel the electricity radiating from his body to yours. It makes it near impossible to focus on the TV, but when you do, all you can see are magnificent costumes.

The only time you speak is during ‘Count Your Blessings’.

“This was always my favourite song, you know.” He says, without looking at you.

“Mine too. Why’s it yours?”

“It’s so romantic.” Is all he says. “You?”

“I think it’s hopeful.”

You risk a glance at him, and he’s staring straight at the screen, but you see the sparkle starting to return. You smile to yourself.

At lunch, you don’t sit together, and you breathe a sigh of relief. You’re sat next to Josh, Jake kind of diagonally across from you. Every time you chance a look at him, he’s staring at you. It feels so intense, like you might shatter under the weight of his gaze.

You decide you have to talk to him, today. You have to apologise. You need him to know why you pushed him away, and that it’s not for lack of feeling on your part. Things are just too messy right now, and you need time, if he’ll even give it to you.

Once you decide this, you start to feel a bit more relaxed. You’re two glasses of wine in, and you start to itch to have the conversation over with. You just want to clear the air. You want to be able to be friends again. You want things to go back to how they were, before.

After lunch, Sam rallies the Kiszkas for a quick concert rehearsal in the garage, and you and Kai help Karen with the clean up. Kelly really does go upstairs for a nap.

The three of you chatter about anything and everything, trading recipes, talking about old movies. You’re definitely feeling more comfortable now, the wine has loosened you up. And now you’ve got the awkward conversations with Karen and Ronnie out of the way, you’re actually having a great time.

You wipe down the dining table as Kai and Karen bring out the desserts.

“I don’t know how I’m gonna fit any more food in.” Kai whispers to you when Karen’s in the kitchen.

You giggle. “Me neither, but it looks so fucking good.” You swipe some whipped cream from the top of the trifle with your finger, and put it in your mouth.

Of course, the Kiszka kids find this the opportune moment to walk in, and you make direct eye contact with Jake as you remove your index finger from your mouth with a wet pop. He goes beet red, and quickly scurries into the kitchen.

Kai giggles.

“That was hot.” Sam comments, totally oblivious.

You blush, too.

Everyone agrees that they’re far too full to fit in dessert right now, so Sammy declares it time to wake up Dad for the ‘Annual Kiszka Christmas Concert Extravaganza’. Josh teases him for not being very creative with names.

You don your scarf, and you all trudge through the snow to the garage, where someone (presumably Ronnie) has thoughtfully set up some extra folding chairs for the audience. You take a seat on the far left, Kelly and Karen on the couch, Kai on the other side.

Sammy takes his seat behind the tiny electric keyboard, Jake on his guitar stool the far right, acoustic in hand. Ronnie and Josh sit on two camping chairs in front of the drum kit.

As soon as Sam and Jake play the first notes, you immediately recognise the song, and you grin. When you look over to Jake, he’s grinning back at you. He’s taken his hair down, and he’s wearing his glasses. You’re not sure if he really needs them to play guitar (in fact, you know he doesn’t), and you can’t help but wonder if he’s worn them because you told him you liked them.

Josh and Ronnie begin to sing, a pitch perfect rendition of ‘Baby, It’s Cold Outside’. They giggle with each other as they sing, it adds to the atmosphere. Jake and Sam give the song a little bit of a bluesy flair, and it’s amazing.

When the songs ends, the four of you give as raucous of an applause as you can manage, whooping and hollering and cheering for the Kiszka family band.

“Encore! Encore!” Karen cries.

They all laugh.

“Maybe later, momma. When Daniel is here.” Sam bargains.

“Alright, alright.” She concedes. “Let’s go inside, then. It’s so cold!”

Everyone follows Karen and Kelly up to the house, but Jake hangs back. Now’s your chance. You lean against the garage door and wait for him to notice you. When he does, he smiles.

“Did ya like that?” He takes his glasses off and hangs them on his shirt pocket.

You grin. “Not your usual style, but I can appreciate it.”

He chuckles. “Gotta pay respect to my roots.”

You nod, and it’s quiet for a moment as he fiddles around with the guitars on the rack.

You take a deep breath. “Can we talk?”

He looks up at you, and nods. “Yeah, okay. What’s up?”

“I’m sorry about last night, Jake. I didn’t mean for things to go down that way.”

He sighs. “I thought we weren’t gonna talk about it today.”

“I think we have to. I’m having a hard time.”

“Why’s that?”

You shake your head. “I think I’m just confused.”

His brow furrows. “Last night, when you said you couldn’t. Did you mean you couldn’t at all? Or you just couldn’t then?”

“I don’t know.” You sigh.

He looks almost, relieved? He takes a deep breath. “I know what I want, Y/N. I want to be with you. If you don’t want that now, I’ll wait. But I don’t think I’m ever going to change my mind. I don’t know when it happened, but all of a sudden I can’t imagine my life without you in it. And not just as my friend.”

Your heart is pounding. “I do want this, Jake. I’m just scared. This is all happening so fast.”

“Please, don’t be. I’ve never been more certain of anything in my life. And I don’t think it’s happened fast at all. Five months ago, y’know, when I saw you at that fitting, I felt it. Like a magnetic pull. I didn’t know what it was, but I knew then that you were gonna be important to me.”

“You remember the fitting?”

He nods. “You were adjusting the button on my rose suit pants. You barely said a word to me. I couldn’t get the feeling of your hands on my waist outta my head for a week.”

You shake your head. “But, at the party. You said you didn’t remember.”

He chuckles. “I felt like I’d made a terrible first impression. I’d spent the whole of our first interaction attempting to pick my jaw up off the floor. That night, I was so nervous, I got drunk before I even saw you. I, uh, I was trying to be smooth.”

You can’t help but giggle, but you feel warm tears running down your face.

“Do you really love me?”

“I don’t remember ever feeling this strongly about anyone. I spend every minute of every day wanting to learn more about you, to know you inside and out. You’re the most interesting, passionate, and smart person I’ve ever met. And you took my breath away, when I first saw you. I’d never seen anyone as radiant as you.”

“You took my breath away, too.”

He looks surprised. “Really?”

You nod, your hands shaking. “Yeah. I felt the magnet, too. I thought it was just me.”

He breathes a heavy sigh of relief. “No. Not just you.”

He steps close to you. You’re both standing just inside the garage, out of view of the house. He reaches up to brush his fingertips down your cheek, catching your tears.

“That night in London, when I was drunk, and you helped me in my room. I almost told you everything. Things were complicated, and somehow I found the self-restraint not to. But God, I wanted to. So badly. You looked so beautiful.”

You nod. “The next night, when you kissed me. I never wanted you to stop.”

A small noise leaves his lips. It almost sounds like an elated laugh.

“I should’ve asked you, then. And last night. I didn’t, and I regret that.” He takes a deep breath. He looks nervous. “Can I kiss you?”

“Yes.” You breathe, and he does.

It’s different from all the other kisses. It’s slow, but not hesitant. He wraps his arms around your middle to hold you to him firmly, his hands sliding under your sweater, his thumb rubbing your spine.

It’s so intense, it makes you shiver. It feels right, this time.

You press your tongue against his lip, and you feel his surprise, but he lets you in. Everything feels like it’s moving in slow motion, you’re tasting him, really savouring him, and it’s unlike anything you’ve ever felt. This feels like a life-changing kiss. Things won’t be the same after this.

You knot both of your hands into the hair behind his ears, pushing it back off his face, while pulling him closer to you. Before you can get too heated, he breaks contact, leaving a final, soft kiss on your lips. He rests his forehead on yours, your eyes still closed. You sigh.

“I think I love you, too, Jake.”

He pulls back to look at you, his hands still gripping your waist, eyes flicking between yours.

“You don’t have to say it just because I did. We can take this slow. We haven’t even slept together yet.” He chuckles.

You shake your head. “No. I’m not saying it just because you did.”

He beams, and gives you another soft kiss before pulling you into him. You bury your face in his neck. He smells like home.

After a few moments, you pull away. “We should head back inside.”

“Yeah.” He smiles, sheepishly. “I don’t want to.”

You giggle. “Me neither, but I can’t disappoint your mother again.”

“Fair enough.” He nods. “Danny and his parents will be here soon. We’ve probably got a few more hours to get through.”

He takes your hand in his, and you realise he’s been wearing your gloves all this time.

You grin.

You step outside as he closes up the garage, and you follow him up to the house.

The rest of the afternoon goes by in a blur. The Wagners arrive at some point, without Josie, as she’d gone off to spend time with her partner’s family. You all eat dessert, and more drinks and gifts are shared. You’re dizzy with adrenaline.

When you’d arrived at the back door, Jake had dropped your hand, giving you a sly smirk, before opening the door for you and ushering you inside.

You’d received questioning looks from his siblings, but you just let it lie. Right now, this was just for the two of you. They’d know soon enough.

For the rest of the day, you couldn’t keep your eyes off of each other, even if you’d tried. Which you didn’t. You found yourself swooning over the simplest of things, him bringing his mom a cup of tea, or helping Ronnie do up the laces of her new sneakers. He even spent a minute straightening Sam’s collar, and you thought that was adorable. They were grown-ups, but they still cared for each other like siblings should.

At one point, he caught you coming out of the guest bathroom downstairs and pulled you into a corner just to plant a hard kiss on your mouth and walk away with a snicker. You were positively giddy.

It’s dark now, early evening. Everyone is scattered around the dining and living rooms, nursing their drinks and laughing together. You’re perched on the arm of the sofa by Sammy and Josh as they play a very heated game of Mario Kart, Kai whispering pointers in Josh’s ear. This is what you remember of your family Christmases. You feel happy.

Jake appears from nowhere and taps you on the shoulder, tipping his head toward the front door. You raise your eyebrows and he just smirks, pulling you up from your seat and ushering you outside.

Your teeth start chattering the moment the cold air hits you. He pulls the door closed behind himself, leaving you both standing in just the dim porch light.

“What are you doing? It’s fucking freezing out here!” You rub your arms, hoping to cause some friction between your bare hands and the wool of Jake’s sweater.

He chuckles. “This’ll only take a sec. Close your eyes.”

You frown, but you comply.

“Hold out your hands.”

You feel something small and square drop into your palm, and you chance opening one eye to give him a quizzical look.

He laughs. “Okay, you can open.”

You look down, and see a small, silver box in your hands, tied with a yellow ribbon. You look up at him. “What is this?”

He rolls his eyes. “Just open it.”

You pull the ribbon and it falls undone into your fingers. You reach forward to shove it into his pocket, and he smirks.

You feel a little nervous, but with shaky hands, you pry open the lid of the box.

Inside, you see a small, gold pendant, on a matching delicate chain. You touch it gently, before sliding your fingers underneath it to lift it out.

It’s a bow and arrow. Like his suit. Exactly like it.

You gasp, and look up at him, your eyes already brimming with tears.

“Jake.” You breathe.

He smiles. “Merry Christmas, Y/N.”

You clutch the pendant between your fingers so as not to drop it and lunge for him, wrapping your arms around his torso and burying your face into his chest. Your heart is pounding in your ears.

You feel him chuckle as he reciprocates the embrace, wrapping his arms around your shoulders and kissing the top of your head.

“I’m glad you like it.”

You pull back to look at him. “I love it, Jake. It’s perfect. Thank you. You didn’t have to.”

You smiles warmly and takes the necklace from your hand, gesturing for you to turn around. “I know I didn’t have to. I wanted to.”

You lift your hair for him as he wraps the chain around your throat and clasps it for you, using the opportunity to brush his warm fingertips over the back of your neck. You shudder.

When you turn back around, you lift your hand to run your own fingers over the pendant. It feels like it was made for you.

He takes a step back to look at you, admiring the addition.

“I saw it in London, when I was out the day before the show, before I’d decided to wear the suit. It’s what made me do it, actually. I thought of you instantly.”

You sniffle. “When we were fighting?”

He nods. “Well, we were never really fighting, y’know. I was under the impression you’d accused me of having a crush on you, so I was, uh, avoiding you. I guess I lived up to that by buying you a necklace when I didn’t know if you’d ever want to speak to me again.” He steps forward again, putting his hands on your waist and resting his forehead against yours.

You giggle through your tears. “You thought I was mad at you for having a crush on me?”

He nods, his hair tickling your cheeks.

“How could I have thought that? You never said it.”

He smirks. “I thought that’s what you were saying to me, outside your hotel room in Manchester.”

You think back to that night, everything suddenly clicking into place. “Oh, Jake. That’s not what I meant.”

“Well, yeah. I know that now.” He shrugs. “What did you mean?” He asks you slyly, although you’re sure he already knows the answer.

“I meant that I had feelings for you.”

He hums. “Thought so.”

He lifts his hands to cup your face, and plants the softest of kisses on your lips.

When he pulls back, you sigh, your eyes still closed.

“Thank you for waiting.”

You open your eyes, and he's looking at you questioningly. “Waiting for what?”

“Until you sorted things out with Lily. I know I reacted poorly last night, but I know you were trying to do the right thing. Not hurt anyone.”

He hums. “I’m sorry I didn’t do it sooner.”

You shake your head. “No, don’t be sorry for that. She deserved to get the chance to talk to you in person, before things got complicated. You did the right thing.”

He nods. “I know.”

“Are you okay?”

He nods. “I’m okay. I wasn’t surprised, or anything. And I would’ve done it, if she hadn’t. Maybe I’m still processing.”

You continue. You want to get this off your chest. “I’m a bit worried about that, if I’m honest. I know it’s over between you two, but I also know it’s fresh. You might be grieving that relationship for a while. I just want you to know that it’s okay. We’ve jumped into this really fast, already professing our love for each other. If you need to take a step back, or hit pause, while you sort things out, or if you need to be on your own for a while, I want you to have that chance.”

He looks at you confusedly. “Do you want to hit pause?”

“No, that’s not what I’m saying. But I’ve been single for a while, and I’ve also had a crush on you for a while,” you blush, “so it’s not the same for me. I just want you to know that I’ll wait for you, if that’s what you need.”

He grins. “I don’t wanna wait for you anymore. When we were young, my mom always told us; when we found love, real love, to never let it go. I don’t plan to.”

You giggle. “She said the same thing to me.”

“About me?”

“I think so.”

He pulls you into him again. “I’m not gonna let you go.”

When you make it back inside, most everyone pretends not to notice you’d slipped away, except Danny. As Jake brushes his hand over your back to head to the kitchen, Danny gives you a subtle look across the living room, and you nod. He grins.

You walk over to him and sling your arm around his waist, not saying anything. He just rests his chin on the top of your head and smiles.

He whispers into your hair. “You worked it out, I take it?”

You blush. “I’ll tell you one day.”

He chuckles.

You whisper to him. “What’s going on with you and Jules?”

He snickers, and without looking at you he says, “I’ll tell you one day.”

You smile.

As the evening comes to a close, the boys bring out their guitars one last time, and Josh and Jake sing a melancholy song you’ve never heard before. Danny stays close by your side as he strums one of Kelly’s old acoustics, and you and Jake make the most intense eye contact, you start to feel your head spin.

When all is said and done, Kelly announces that it’s time for him to go to bed, and everyone giggles and makes their rounds, kissing and hugging one another, and wishing everyone a final Merry Christmas.

The Wagners clear out, and Josh and Kai head to the basement for bed, but not before Josh gives you a drunk, sloppy kiss on the cheek and a tight squeeze. Kai gives you a big grin and ushers his other half down the stairs. Karen gives you a warm embrace and thanks you for coming, and she and Kelly head upstairs to retire, too. Sammy and Ronnie are still curled up on the couch, some old action movie playing softly on the TV.

As you stand in the entryway, Jake takes your hand and threads his fingers through yours.

“Do you want me to take you back to the motel?” He asks quietly.

You nod.

His face falls imperceptibly, but he takes your scarf from the hook and wraps it around your neck, pulling on his own coat, too.

You grab your bag, and head over to give Sammy a kiss on the top of his head, squeezing Ronnie’s shoulder.

“Merry Christmas, you guys. Thanks for having me.”

They both look up at you with sleepy smiles, and Sam’s eyes flick to Jake in the doorway before coming back to rest on you.

“Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.” He mutters, a cheeky grin plastered on his face, and Ronnie smacks his arm.

You blush. “Goodnight, Sammy.”

“‘Night, Y/N. Glad you came.”

You smile. “Me too.”

Chapter 8 (Part 2)

@ohgodthefeeling-gvf @profitofthedune @sinarainbows @klarxtr @jakesgrapejuice @gretavangroupie @mackalah @clairesjointshurt @writingcold @alwaysonthemend @jakekiszkasbuttsweat

happy early birthday @klarxtr! sorry i couldn't reply to your comment on this account - but consider this my gift to you xx

#jake kiszka #greta van fleet #sam kiszka #danny wagner #josh kiszka #jake gvf #jake kiszka x reader #gvf fic #greta van fleet fic #greta van fleet smut #gvf smut

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beachy--head · 7 months ago

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Seven Sentence Sunday

Tagged by the amazing @lavellenchanted (thank you <3) to share seven sentences from a current WIP.

(yes, this is a bit more than seven sentences, but, well, it's not Sunday anymore either, so let's follow the spirit of the meme and not the letter, shall we?)

He was afraid to know the answer, but he couldn't help asking. "When you were married to Matthew, did you ever... I don’t know, ask yourself if you wanted another baby?" April shook her head vigorously. "No. Not at all. At first we were busy adjusting to being a blended family, to life with a baby and a toddler and parents who were still grieving." She swallowed hard, and he refrained from going to her. "It was never a thing we talked about, and I had other concerns. And then Covid happened, and between the chaos, the long hours, the distance... It was never a question." She looked at him and bit her lip, and he knew she wanted to ask but was afraid of his answer. "You know, I hated being an only child. And I know that she’s not, not really, that Samuel is her brother, but I never wanted for Harriet to grow up without siblings she could play with, fight with, learn with. But after she was born, I never seriously entertained the idea of having more kids, because..." The next part was a bit difficult to say, and he lowered his gaze, suddenly feeling shy. "Because you and I were over, and I guess it never occurred to me to have more kids if you weren't their mother."

Tagging @japril12, @japrilfools, @jenniferiawrence, @useragarfield and @benwvatt if you want to do it!

#ask #writing #thank you Sarah!#i love writing jackson so much you guys

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xcherrypie · 8 months ago

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Lazy days

Summary: Sundays are for relaxing, and Sam wants to make sure that relax is exactly what you do.

Words: 1k

You smile to yourself at the feeling of Sams warm breath tickling the hairs on the back of your neck, his fingers laying gently over your stomach. As you try wriggle out of his grasp it’s evident that despite his deep sleep he doesn’t want his girl going anywhere. “Sam” you groan, “I want a brew” in saying so you move his arm off from around you and make your way downstairs to the kitchen, fully aware your boyfriend would be down to follow you any second, like a little lost puppy.

You were right, not even seconds into the kettle boiling you screech as Sam snakes his bare arms around you, lifting you into the air, spinning you around. “Put me down Samuel” you laugh, attempting to sound stern but failing miserably. “Alright” he smirks, placing you on the kitchen counter, instantly positioning himself between your legs. Before you could even look up at Sam, his lips gently crashed Into yours, he tasted so sweet and as you melted into the kiss your fingers found his hair. He smirked as he placed loose kisses on your lips, that left you wanting more. His right hand cupped your face as his left hand gripped your waist, pulling you in closer to him resulting in there being no space left between you.

The kettle boiled and Sam pulled away from you, resting his hand on your sides. “I’ll have two sugars in mine love” he winks, turning to walk away into the living room. “Your a dickhead” you pout, jumping from the counter, watching Sam walk off. He absolutely loved teasing you, he’d always cave in eventually of course, he couldn’t resist you himself. But there was just something he loved so much about you being so desperate for him that he can’t help himself.

After a shared breakfast on the sofa and three episodes of reality TV you’d come to the collective decision to carry on the day as you’d started; doing absolutely nothing. Sam was obviously delighted with this decision as it meant he could spend all day on his little wind up mission that he’d started back in the kitchen that morning. However little did he know it wouldn’t last as long as he’d hoped, especially after you’d arrived back downstairs from a quick shower in nothing but one of his shirts.

“What?” You question in response to Sam raising both eyebrows at you. “You know what” he sighs back. He was right, you knew exactly why he was looking at you with such lust and would be lying if you said you hadn’t chose such an outfit on purpose. Sam found you attractive in whatever you wore but due to your significant height difference whenever you wore anything of his he’d just melt.

As you selected a new episode of your show Sam placed his head in your lap, a move so subtle even you was unsure if he was doing it on purpose. All morning your need for Sam had been growing and growing and was starting to get too much, especially as he moved his head over your crotch, you felt the need for him to be even closer.

“Sam” you murmur. “Hmm” he responds whilst his fingers trace along your bare thighs. “I need you” you practically whisper, as if your not the only two people in the house. Sam didn’t say anything, just continued drawing circles over your now achy legs, each time getting closer to your core. As your breath hitched and you open your mouth to ask for him a second time, his gentle touches turned into gentle kisses. Kisses that alone were creating a wet mess under the cotten shirt you wore. He positioned himself so he could kiss further up your body, making sure he didn’t leave an inch of your skin, his hand cupped your breasts and his nibbled and sucked at your neck, causing whines to escape your lips. He stopped suddenly, looking straight into your eyes, almost inviting you to beg for him again. “ Please Sam” you whine causing a mischievous smirk to spread across his lip. “Seeing as you asked so nicely” he hums back, already spreading kisses back down your body.

Your body relaxed as you threw your head back, each kiss against your skin creating more heat between your legs. Sam eventually made his way back down to your thighs, repositioning himself on his knees, between your legs. You anticipated yourself for more teasing, something Sam usually takes great joy in doing, however clearly the tension got too much for him at this point as in one motion he pushed the hem of the shirt over your hips and licks up your folds.

The room fills with croaky moans as your breath gets faster, you can’t take your eyes of Sam while his pink lips suck on your clit, even his breath against you causing the most pleasurable sensation, he doesn’t take his lips off you as his hands wander up to your breasts. The combination of Sam eating you out and his fingers lighting playing with and pinching your nipples creates that familiar feeling in the pit of your stomach, you were close, and Sam knew it.

“Please don’t stop” you whined your hands forming a firm grip in Sam’s hair. “Hm but you look so pretty like this y/n” he responded, looking up at you, replacing his tongue with his fingers. His fingers started pumping gently yet quickly inside of you as your legs started to shake. Using his other hand he held your shaking leg down as he hovered his lips over yours, “Let go for me baby” he mumbled into a passionate kiss, causing you to come undone simply by his words.

Your left beneath him panting while he takes his fingers from inside you, bringing them to your mouth, smiling up at him you suck on his fingers, cleaning up the mess you’d made. “Good girl” he responds placing a soft kiss on your forehead.

Notes: Hey guys! Hope everyone has had a lovely Easter 🐣 feel free to send over any requests x

#imagines #sam fender #boyfriend imagine #fanfic #sam fender imagines #sam x reader #fluff #one shot #angst #smut #Spotify

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ladysif8 · 2 months ago

Text

✨Glitter Warfare✨

•Pairing: Steve Rogers/Bucky Barnes

•Rating: Mature

•Tags: Recovering Bucky Barnes, Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes, Captain America Steve Rogers, Crabby Bucky, Avengers, Comic Book Villian, Ridiculousness, Bucky Just Wants To Bake His Bread, Anal Sex, Boys In Love.

•Summary: All Bucky wanted was a quiet Sunday in the kitchen, baking bread and enjoying his quiet day. But when Steve answers his phone without checking the caller ID, Bucky finds himself dodging blasts and battling robots instead. It's just another day in the life of Bucky Barnes, where glitter explosions and super-soldier boyfriends are par for the course

Steve ducked as another blast shot over his head, scorching a nearby lamppost. "Bucky, baby. I'm sorry! I thought it was the pizza guy!"

Bucky, half sprinting, half dodging between wrecked cars, let out a growl as he ripped the driver's door off a trashed Honda. "I don't care if it was the pizza guy, Steve! Look where we are!"

The Honda door clanged as Bucky used it to shield himself from a rapid barrage of energy blasts, each one coming from one of the dozens of murder-bots swarming the street. In the center of it all, perched atop the roof of a demolished bodega, was the mastermind behind the chaos. Dr. Magnifico Malarkey, a half-mad scientist wearing a purple cape, lime green goggles, and what looked like an LED-infused top hat, bellowed his plan for world domination.

"Behold! My Exotic Electro-Eliminators! Soon, New York will be mine! None shall resist my weaponized disco technology! And then, the world will dance to MY tune!"

Steve groaned. "I swear, the villains just keep getting weirder."

Bucky made a break for Steve, now ducked behind an overturned bus, the Honda door absorbing yet another blast. He was practically snarling when he reached his boyfriend. "You just had to answer your damn phone." With a grunt, Bucky flung the Honda door like a shield, sending it spinning through the air toward one of the robots. It sliced straight through, taking off the robot's head with a satisfying clang.

He sank down beside Steve, pressing his back against the bus as he yanked out his gun and cocked it with a sharp click. "So... what now?"

Steve winced, still breathless from dodging lasers. "Well, we could always try unplugging his speakers. I'm pretty sure they're the source of his power."

Bucky shook his head, a small smirk forming on his lips. "You owe me a pizza after this."

Just as Bucky finished cocking his gun, a familiar voice crackled over the comms. "I gotta tell you guys, listening to your marital disputes while I'm dodging death rays over here? Not my idea of a good time," Sam's voice rang out, frustration clear.

Bucky's eyes narrowed as he snapped back without hesitation. "I don't need your input, Samuel. If you can't handle one murderous disco villain on your own, then why are you even wearing that star-spangled bird suit anyway?"

There was a pause, followed by Natasha's unmistakable snickering on the other end. Clint whistled low and slow. "Oof, Buck. You didn't have to go for the jugular."

Bucky wasn't having any of it. "Focus on your targets, Legolas."

Just then, Tony's voice chimed in, dripping with amusement. "Steve, buddy, you might wanna control your boy before he takes Sam's wings and flies them himself."

Steve shot Bucky an exasperated look, but before he could respond, Bucky's sharp blue eyes were already fixed on him. "Control me? Control me?" Bucky growled, his voice dangerously low.

Steve sighed, knowing better than to poke the bear any further. "I didn't say anything."

Bucky leaned in, his lips ghosting close to Steve's ear. "You better not, Steven."

Another blast from one of the robots zipped past their heads, cutting through the tension for the moment. Steve shook his head, muttering under his breath. "I swear, if we survive this, I'm throwing my phone in the Hudson."

"Good. Because next time you answer it, I'm not coming." Bucky fired off a couple of shots, dropping another robot as he moved to cover Steve.

It wasn't that Bucky minded pitching in and helping out — retirement got boring sometimes, and if blasting robots with his boyfriend meant blowing off some steam, so be it. But it was Sunday. Sundays were for baking bread, bagels, muffins, cookies — whatever else the hell he felt like making in that kitchen of theirs.

And more importantly, Bucky had been this close to finally getting Steve to answer the question. The one Steve had casually bombed him with last weekend, the one Steve had been avoiding all week like it carried the plague.

The marriage proposal.

Steve had dropped it out of nowhere, as if it was just another topic for Sunday evening dinner. "I think we should get married." he'd said, while taking a bite of his grilled cheese like they weren't talking about changing their entire lives.

Bucky had nearly dropped his grilled cheese in his soup . He hadn't answered. Instead, he'd spent the next week trying to pretend he hadn't heard it at all. Maybe Steve was just thinking out loud, right? Maybe it didn't need an answer right away. But today, Bucky had worked up the nerve to bring it up again. He was going to ask Steve if he really meant it, if he was serious.

And then Sam called.

So excuse Bucky if he was a little cranky, thinking his boyfriend might've answered that damn phone on purpose. He could've said no. He could've told Sam to handle it himself. But no. Steve had practically jumped at the chance to avoid the conversation — at least that's how it felt to Bucky. And now, instead of fresh-baked bagels and some clarity on where they stood, he was tearing apart the streets of New York, dodging disco-bots.

"I know what you're thinking," Steve muttered, sensing Bucky's frustration through their bond or whatever it was.

"Yeah?" Bucky snapped, firing another round toward one of the robots. "You think you know?"

"You think I did this on purpose."

Bucky ducked behind a wrecked taxi, firing off a glare in Steve's direction. "You saying you didn't?"

"I'm saying we'll talk. Just... not while we're in the middle of a robot uprising, okay?"

Bucky gritted his teeth, taking out another bot with a well-placed shot. "Fine. But we are talking about it after this."

Steve nodded, a look of determination on his face. "After this."

Bucky wasn't sure he believed him. But for now, he'd focus on the fight.

Bucky ducked as another disco-bot exploded, spewing glitter and sparks. "I swear to god, this guy has the worst taste. Who even makes killer robots this shiny?"

"I'm starting to think this is just an elaborate audition for America's Got Talent,” Clint chimed in over the comms. "Because if this guy breaks into a dance routine, I'm out."

Natasha's laugh came through next. "You think he's gonna pull out jazz hands, Barton?"

"If I see jazz hands, I'm gonna shoot them," Bucky muttered darkly, firing off another round.

"Relax, Grandma," Clint shot back. "I'm sure they're too shiny for you to hit."

"Clint," Steve warned, tone stern, "don't antagonize him."

Bucky's jaw clenched, but before he could snap, Tony cut in with a sigh. "Can we focus here, team? We've got to shut down Dr. Disco Inferno before he drops the bass and the entire city starts doing the Electric Slide involuntarily."

"His name is Dr. Magnifico Malarkey," Sam corrected.

"Who the hell even chooses that name?" Natasha deadpanned.

"I don't know," Tony said. "I thought about legally changing my name to 'Tony Stark the Magnificent,' but Pepper said it was 'too much.'"

"Gee, wonder why," Bucky muttered as he dodged another blast. "Can we just get this over with? I've got bread dough rising."

There was a short pause on the line, before Sam's voice came back. "Wait, is that what you're upset about? Bread dough?"

Bucky growled. "It's Sunday, Sam. Sundays are for baking. I don't get my carbs in, you deal with a cranky Bucky all week."

"Wouldn't want that," Clint chuckled. "Though I gotta admit, cranky Bucky is pretty fun to watch."

Bucky's voice turned icy. "You wanna find out how fun, Barton?"

"Uh, no thanks, Buck. You're doing great out there!" Clint replied quickly.

"Tony, please tell me you have a plan," Steve sighed, his voice the calmest of the group despite the chaos around them.

"Of course I have a plan," Tony replied, sounding mildly offended. "We're gonna blow up the speakers."

Sam groaned. "We're seriously going after the guy's sound system?"

Natasha's voice crackled in next. "Are we sure that's his power source? I mean, what if it's just, I don't know, really good speakers?"

"Yeah, Tasha's right," Clint said, "this guy could just be compensating for something."

There was a brief silence, then Bucky's deadpan voice cut through. "That's the understatement of the year."

Steve shifted beside Bucky, glancing at him. "Alright, let's just stay on mission. Tony, how do we get close without getting fried by the robots?"

"Well, that's the tricky part," Tony said, clearly grinning behind his helmet. "You don't."

"Really helpful, Stark," Bucky muttered.

"I'm kidding, geez. You guys are no fun today. Just let me fire an EMP blast. You'll have a few seconds to move in and smash his DJ setup before it resets."

Bucky rubbed his temple. "This is the dumbest plan I've ever heard."

"And yet, here you are, still following it," Tony quipped back.

Steve leaned in to Bucky, lowering his voice even though everyone could still hear him through the comms. "After this, we're taking a break. I'll help you bake."

Bucky shot him a look. "Yeah, well, don't think that gets you off the hook for dodging the other thing."

Tony's voice rang out again, clearly eavesdropping. "Ooh, what other thing? This sounds juicy."

Steve sighed, clearly done with the entire conversation. "Tony, fire the EMP already."

"You got it, Freedom Fry," Tony replied, and then a bright pulse of light shot out, temporarily shutting down the disco-bots.

"Alright, lovebirds," Natasha said, laughter in her voice, "time to take down Dr. Malarkey and get back to your regularly scheduled baking."

Steve gave Bucky a quick nod. "Ready?"

Bucky grinned, eyes sharp. "Let's end this glitter-filled nightmare."

As Steve and Bucky advanced, weaving between the debris and wreckage, everything seemed to be going according to plan. They were closing in on Dr. Magnifico Malarkey, and Tony's EMP had knocked out the bulk of the disco-bots. They were almost there when Bucky heard a distinct whistle in the air.

"Bucky—" Steve started, eyes widening, but it was too late.

Something lobbed through the air toward Bucky, landing just a few feet in front of him. It looked like a... grenade? But it was brightly colored, almost cartoonish, with swirling neon stripes and what appeared to be glitter glue spiraling around it.

Before Bucky could even process what he was looking at, the grenade exploded in a puff of neon pink smoke.

"BUCKY!" Steve's voice was panicked, already lunging toward him, expecting the worst. The whole battlefield seemed to freeze for a second, the cloud of pink dust billowing in the air like some sort of twisted cotton candy nightmare.

Steve coughed as the cloud dissipated, his heart pounding as he strained to see Bucky through the haze. "Buck? Baby, you okay?!"

Then, through the lingering pink mist, Bucky slowly appeared. Standing there, arms at his sides, looking utterly... ridiculous. He was completely covered head to toe in neon pink powder and glitter. His hair, his face, even his tactical gear — all of it coated in a sparkling mess that shimmered in the sunlight.

There was a long beat of silence over the comms before Clint's voice broke through, full of barely-contained laughter. "That's never coming out."

Bucky stood frozen for a moment, blinking slowly as a bit of glitter drifted down from his eyelashes. His expression was one of pure, unfiltered murder. He spat out a mouthful of glitter, wiping his face in vain. "Fuck. This. Shit."

Steve, trying desperately not to burst out laughing, took a cautious step forward. "Bucky... I—”

Bucky wasn't listening. He dropped to one knee, fury in his eyes as he swung the sniper rifle off his back, his movements calm and deliberate despite the pink mess covering him. He braced the rifle, aimed toward the rooftop where Dr. Magnifico Malarkey was still standing, cackling like a maniac, and lined up his shot.

Without a word, Bucky fired.

The shot rang out, and for a split second, the mad doctor's cackling stopped abruptly as his ridiculous LED-lit top hat went flying off his head. He stood there in stunned silence, hatless, blinking in confusion.

"Tony, Sam," Bucky growled into the comms, his voice laced with venom, "he's all yours."

Tony's voice, filled with a grin, came through. "Copy that, Pink Panther."

"Don't." Bucky warned.

But Sam couldn't resist. "Damn, Buck, I'd say that look suits you."

Bucky fired another round into the air, this time clearly just to let off steam. "You both owe me after this."

As Sam and Tony swooped in from the air to take down Dr. Malarkey, Clint's laugh rang out again over the comms. "Honestly, I'm just impressed. Bucky's tactical pink attack — no one saw it coming."

"Clint, I swear—" Bucky started, but another puff of glitter fell from his hair, cutting off his threat as he groaned in frustration.

Steve stifled a laugh, patting Bucky on the shoulder. "You're doing great, sweetheart."

Bucky shot him a deadly glare. "Not. A. Word."

The battlefield was finally quiet. Dr. Magnifico Malarkey was in custody, his disco-bots destroyed, and the ridiculous neon-colored nightmare was over. Everyone was mostly fine, except for Clint, who was limping dramatically with a sprained ankle, and Bucky... who looked like he'd gone through a glitter factory explosion.

Bucky stood there, arms crossed, still covered head to toe in neon pink powder and glitter. His face was set in a deadly scowl, the kind of look that made grown men rethink their life choices. Steve approached him cautiously, suppressing a smile. "You okay? You wanna head home?"

Bucky turned slowly to Steve, his expression one of pure incredulity, like Steve had just said the dumbest thing in the world. "And track this," he gestured at his glitter-covered body, "into the house? And clean it out of the shower? Did you hit your head out there, Steve?"

Steve put his hands up in surrender. "Alright, fair point."

Nearby, Tony was snickering, unable to contain his amusement at the sight of Bucky looking like a grumpy, sparkly disco ball. As Bucky stormed off toward the compound's showers, clearly done with the entire situation, Tony sidled up to Steve. "What did you do to irritate your little Buck Kitten?"

Steve dragged a hand over his face, groaning. "I, uh, might've proposed last weekend. And then didn't say anything else about it."

Tony blinked at him, like Steve had just sprouted two heads. "You what?"

Steve quickly added, "But Bucky's been ignoring me for a week, so... there's that."

Tony looked from Steve to Bucky, who was now halfway across the compound, glitter shimmering in the sunlight as he stalked toward the showers. "Well, yeah. No wonder he's pissed. You drop a bomb like that and then just... what, leave him hanging?"

Steve sighed. "It wasn't exactly my best move."

Sam, who had been standing nearby listening to the whole exchange, shook his head. "Let me get this straight. He was finally ready to talk about it today, and then you answered the phone, and here you are. Covered in robot shrapnel and glitter instead of baking bread and getting married?"

Steve rubbed the back of his neck, sheepish. "Yeah... that's about right."

Sam snorted, crossing his arms. "Man, you're lucky you didn't propose with a text message."

Tony was still grinning like a Cheshire cat, clearly enjoying the drama. "You gotta fix this, Rogers. That much glitter's a cry for help."

Steve watched Bucky disappear into the compound, still sparkling under the sun. "I know, I know," he muttered. "I'll fix it. After he's had a shower."

"Yeah, you better," Sam chuckled. "But maybe next time? Let the call go to voicemail."

Steve pushed open the door to the compound's locker room , careful not to make too much noise. The shower was still running, steam filling the air, and Bucky stood in front of the mirror, a towel slung low around his waist. His hair was damp, drops of water still clinging to his chest, and he had his head tilted to the side, one finger digging into his ear.

"Damn glitter," Bucky muttered under his breath, clearly annoyed. He squinted at the mirror, trying to see if he'd managed to get the last stubborn specks out of his ear.

Steve leaned against the doorframe, unable to help the small smile tugging at his lips. Bucky, so serious, fighting a losing battle against a sea of sparkles. Even after everything they'd been through today, the sight was endearing in a way that made Steve's heart swell.

"Lose the amused look," Bucky grumbled, catching Steve's expression in the reflection. "This is anything but funny."

Steve quickly straightened up, clearing his throat to hide his smile. "Sorry. I wasn't—" He took a few steps closer, trying to sound apologetic but failing to mask the warmth in his voice. "It's just... you're still glittery."

Bucky shot him a flat look, dropping his hand from his ear. "Yeah, no shit, Steve. It's like the stuff's multiplying."

Steve chuckled softly, stepping closer until he was standing right behind Bucky. He could see the faint shimmer still clinging to Bucky's skin, the flecks of pink glitter catching the light even under the steam. Gently, Steve placed his hands on Bucky's shoulders, feeling the tension there, the frustration simmering just below the surface.

"Sorry," Steve said again, softer this time. His fingers traced down Bucky's arms, his voice low and sincere. "For everything. The glitter. The call. The proposal."

Bucky sighed, letting his head fall back slightly, leaning into Steve's touch. "You've got a lot to be sorry for, huh?"

Steve smiled, softer now, less amused and more filled with affection. "Yeah, I guess I do."

Bucky glanced back at him, his expression still a little annoyed but softening around the edges. "Just help me get this damn glitter off, and maybe I'll consider forgiving you."

Steve's grin widened, his hands sliding down to Bucky's waist, brushing the towel playfully. "I think I can manage that."

Steve's hands slid around Bucky's waist, the towel hanging by a thread as he leaned in close, his breath warm against Bucky's neck. Bucky's lips twitched into a small, reluctant smile, feeling Steve's familiar touch. He was still annoyed, sure—but when Steve looked at him like that, like Bucky was the only thing that mattered in the world, it was hard to stay mad for long.

"You know," Steve murmured, voice low and teasing, "we could save some water..."

Bucky rolled his eyes, though the hint of a smirk tugged at the corner of his mouth. "Steve, I just took a shower.."

Steve grinned, pressing a soft kiss to Bucky's shoulder. "Think of it as teamwork."

Bucky chuckled under his breath, the sound vibrating in his chest. "Fine," he relented, "but if I find more glitter on me after this, I'm gonna throw you in the next pile of robot shrapnel we come across."

"Deal," Steve said, already moving to undo the towel as he guided Bucky back toward the shower. The hot water hit them both, steam swirling around, and for a moment, everything else fell away—the mission, the glitter, the chaos.

It was just them.

Bucky's annoyed grumbles faded into contented silence, and whatever lingering frustrations he'd been holding onto washed away with the water. They moved in sync, hands roaming, not in a rush, just savoring the closeness that was theirs and theirs alone.

But that? That was nobody's business but theirs.

Steve jogged up the familiar road to their house, the early morning air crisp and refreshing. Music pumped through his headphones, fueling his steady pace as he smiled and waved at the neighbors along the way. Layla, the chatty one from next door, was out watering her garden. When she spotted him, she waved enthusiastically, calling out something Steve couldn't hear over the music.

He slowed as he reached their sidewalk, pulling out an earbud and wiping his face with the bottom of his shirt. Layla hollered something again, but Steve just gave her a tight-lipped smile and a wave before jogging up the steps and slipping into the house.

"Bucky?" he called out, pulling off his shoes by the door. Silence greeted him.

Steve sighed, raking a hand through his hair. He'd thought after their steamy shower last night, all would be forgiven. But boy, was he wrong. Bucky could freeze someone out with the best of them, and it seemed like Steve was still in the doghouse.

Following the smell of something delicious, Steve wandered into the kitchen. The sight that met him made his stomach rumble. Bucky was standing at the counter, elbow-deep in dough, working it like a pro. His hair was tied back, a focused expression on his face as he kneaded the dough with practiced hands. Two loaves of sourdough were cooling on the rack, their golden crusts perfect. On the counter beside them sat bagels—blueberry, everything bagels, and jalapeño-cheddar, their fragrant scents mixing with the fresh, warm smell of muffins. Chocolate chip, wild berry, and apple cinnamon muffins were cooling nearby, making the kitchen smell like a bakery.

Steve's mouth watered, but he didn't dare interrupt Bucky just yet. He knew better than to poke the bear when Bucky was in one of his moods, especially when it came to baking.

Instead, Steve leaned against the doorframe, watching his boyfriend work. The concentration on Bucky's face was intense, like this bread was some kind of personal mission. Steve's heart swelled. Even when Bucky was upset, he made magic in the kitchen.

"Smells amazing in here," Steve said softly, breaking the silence.

Bucky didn't even look up from his dough, but Steve caught the subtle twitch of his eyebrow.

Steve took a tentative step forward, eyeing the pile of fresh bagels. "Am I still in trouble, or can I steal one of those?" he asked, half teasing, half serious.

Bucky's hands paused for a moment before he resumed kneading. "Depends," he said, voice cool. "You gonna answer your phone the next time Sam calls, or finally talk to me first?"

Steve winced, rubbing the back of his neck. He walked over to the counter, picking up a jalapeño-cheddar bagel and breaking it in half. "Point taken," he muttered, taking a bite.

Bucky's lips twitched, but he didn't give in to a smile just yet. "I'm still deciding if you're forgiven."

Steve grinned, chewing slowly. "At least I get bagels while you decide."

Bucky huffed, a half-suppressed smile finally breaking through. "Don't push your luck, punk."

Steve grabbed the coffee pot and poured two mugs, setting one down on the counter next to Bucky before sliding into a seat at the kitchen table. He took another bite of his bagel, chewing thoughtfully as the quiet of the kitchen settled around them. He knew Bucky was still upset, but for the life of him, he couldn't figure out why. The proposal—it wasn't like Steve had just blurted it out without thinking. He'd put effort into it, choosing the pumpkin patch for its warm, autumnal charm. Wasn't that a grand enough gesture?

As he chewed, he stared at his coffee, mulling it over. Maybe he'd misread the situation. Bucky wasn't one for big, flashy moments, but he wasn't exactly subtle either. Maybe he had been hoping for something different—something that Steve, in all his trying, had missed.

Across the room, Bucky finished kneading his dough and carefully placed the last four loaves in the double oven. After wiping his hands on a kitchen towel, he turned to face Steve, crossing his arms as he leaned against the counter. There was an expectant look in his eyes, like he was waiting for Steve to figure something out.

Steve raised an eyebrow, glancing up at Bucky. "What?" he asked, setting his bagel down and gesturing toward the oven. "The bagels are great. The sourdough smells amazing. Are we good?"

Bucky just stared at him, arms still crossed, his silence louder than words.

Steve sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Okay, I can tell you're still upset. And I get that. But I don't understand why. Wasn't the pumpkin patch what you wanted? It felt... special, didn't it?"

Bucky's lips pressed into a thin line as he let out a breath. "Steve, it's not about where you asked. I don't care if it was over dinner or on the couch while we're watching TV. But you didn't say anything after. You just dropped the question on me like a grenade and walked away."

Steve blinked, his brow furrowing. "Wait, that's what you're upset about? Because I thought... I mean, I assumed you needed time to think, so I gave you space."

Bucky shook his head, pushing away from the counter and walking toward the table. He sat down across from Steve, his eyes softer but still serious. "I didn't need space, Steve. I needed you to talk to me. You can't just ask me to marry you and then act like it never happened. I wasn't looking for some big spectacle, but I didn't expect you to drop the question and leave me hanging for a week."

Steve rubbed his temples, groaning softly. "I'm an idiot, aren't I?"

Bucky chuckled, the sound low and rough, but there was no malice in it. "I wouldn't say idiot. But you definitely could've handled it better."

Steve sighed, leaning back in his chair. "I thought I was giving you time to process. I guess I misread that." He reached across the table, taking Bucky's hand in his. "I didn't mean to make you feel like I was avoiding the conversation."

Bucky looked down at their joined hands, squeezing gently. "It's not just that, Steve. It's that you didn't talk to me. I've been waiting for you to say something about it all week, and you just... didn't. That's why I'm upset."

Steve nodded slowly, the realization sinking in. "I get it now. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you feel like I wasn't serious about it."

Bucky's expression softened further, and he exhaled deeply. "It's okay. Just... don't do that again, alright?"

Steve smiled sheepishly, lifting Bucky's hand to his lips and kissing his knuckles. "Deal. I'll make it up to you."

Bucky smirked, finally letting go of the tension that had been hanging between them. "You better. Now, finish your bagel before it gets cold."

Steve's lips ghosted down Bucky's neck, leaving a warm trail in their wake as Bucky's breath hitched. Steve had Bucky's hands pinned above his head, fingers interlaced, holding them firm against the soft pillow. Bucky tugged slightly, testing the hold, but Steve only tightened his grip in response, a low chuckle vibrating against Bucky's skin.

"Don't even think about it," Steve murmured against his ear, his breath hot and teasing. His lips found that sensitive spot just beneath Bucky's jaw, and Bucky couldn't suppress the shiver that ran through him.

"Not thinking about anything," Bucky lied, his voice breathy, eyes hooded as he looked up at Steve. The way Steve was towering over him, his strength barely restrained, sent a pulse of heat through him. He could feel the steady pressure of Steve's body keeping him in place, the weight of it comforting and intoxicating all at once.

"Liar," Steve whispered, his lips curving into a smile before he kissed a slow, deliberate path down the column of Bucky's throat. He nipped lightly at the skin, earning a soft groan from Bucky. The sound went straight to Steve's core, and he hummed in satisfaction, his lips never leaving Bucky's neck.

Bucky arched his back slightly, pressing up into Steve's body, his breath coming faster. He was helpless in Steve's grip, and they both knew it. But that feeling—being held down by Steve, trusting him completely—was what made moments like this electrifying.

Steve paused for a moment, lifting his head to look down at Bucky. "Still want to pretend you're not thinking about anything?"

Bucky's lips twitched into a smirk, but his voice came out rough. "Maybe...maybe I'm thinking about how much I like this."

Steve's eyes darkened, his grip tightening just enough to make Bucky's pulse race. "Good," Steve growled softly, dipping his head to continue his slow, torturous kisses down Bucky's neck, savoring every sound that escaped Bucky's lips.

The soft sunlight of the morning began to fill the room, casting a gentle glow over the two of them as it crept across the bed. The light played on Steve's back, highlighting the contours of his muscles as he shifted his weight, never breaking contact with Bucky. It was moments like these that Bucky cherished deeply—the quiet, unguarded moments when the world seemed to pause just for them.

Steve moved slowly, deliberate in every touch, every breath against Bucky's skin. He shifted his position slightly, aligning their bodies even closer. With one hand still pinning Bucky's wrists, he used the other to trace a line down Bucky's side, over the curve of his rib, stopping at his hip. Steve's fingers danced lightly across the skin there, eliciting a shiver from Bucky.

Bucky caught his breath, eyes flickering with anticipation and a touch of mischief as he watched Steve's every move. "You know," he whispered, his voice thick with emotion and desire, "sometimes I forget just how much power you hold over me."

Steve smiled, a deep, affectionate expression that crinkled the corners of his eyes. "Only sometimes?" he teased back, leaning in to capture Bucky's lips in a soft, lingering kiss that spoke volumes more than words could.

Their kiss deepened, and Bucky's free hand came up to thread through Steve's hair, pulling him even closer if that were possible. The world outside their little cocoon seemed to fade away entirely as they lost themselves in each other.

After a moment, Steve pulled back slightly, resting his forehead against Bucky's. He gazed deeply into Bucky's eyes, seeing not just his reflection but their entire history together reflected back at him. "I love you," he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper but thick with sincerity.

Bucky's heart swelled at the words, a smile touching his lips as he returned the gaze equally intensely. "I love you too, more than anything," he replied, his hand still entwined in Steve's hair, holding him close enough to feel every breath.

With a seductive sway of his hips, he bites down on his bottom lip and gazes up at Steve through thick, luscious lashes. Desire drips from every inch of his bare, taut body as his leaking member rubs against Steve's own, pulsing with need. Despite the small height difference between them, there is no denying the immense size of their throbbing cocks. Bucky's is long and thick, its fat, flushed head leaking with anticipation. But Steve's is even longer and thicker, boasting an impressive uncut length that Bucky can't help but crave. It's like unwrapping a decadent gift, slowly savoring each moment until they both explode with pleasure.

"Well," Bucky purrs, his voice low and sultry, "aren't you going to do something about that?"

Steve's eyes darkened further, a wicked grin playing at the corners of his mouth as he absorbed Bucky's challenge. "Oh, I intend to," he responded, his voice husky with promise. Leaning forward, he captured Bucky's lips once more in a kiss that was both punishing and passionate, leaving them both breathless.

Releasing Bucky's wrists, Steve traced his hands down Bucky's arms, over his chest, pausing to explore every inch of skin with the tips of his fingers. Bucky, now free, wrapped his arms around Steve, pulling him closer until there was no space left between their bodies. Their movements were fluid—two beings so in sync with each other that every shift and sigh was answered in kind.

Steve slid his hand down to grasp Bucky's hip, guiding him into a slow, grinding rhythm that matched the pulse of their hearts. Every roll of their hips deepened their connection, drawing small moans from their lips.

Bucky's whimpers turned into angry, sounding like a petulant child as Steve abruptly stopped their passionate activities. A small grin played on Steve's lips as he swatted at Bucky's hip in playful annoyance. But Bucky was already too distracted, taking full advantage of the moment to run his hands over Steve's firm and hairy chest. He couldn't resist tweaking a pert nipple, causing a sharp intake of breath from Steve. In one smooth motion, Steve reached for the half-empty bottle of lube on the nightstand.

He popped the cap open, smiling down at Bucky with a look of intent that sent shivers racing through Bucky's body. Steve poured a generous amount onto his hand, warming it between his palms before trailing his slick fingers down Bucky's thigh, drawing a line of goosebumps in their wake.

Bucky gasped slightly, his eyes locked on Steve's every move. The anticipation was almost as tantalizing as the touch itself. Steve's fingers lingered at Bucky's entrance, circling slowly, teasingly, before one finger slipped inside. Bucky breathed out a sigh of pleasure mixed with a hint of impatience.

"Steve," he murmured, a gentle nudge in his voice urging Steve to not hold back.

Steve responded by adding another finger, scissoring them gently to prepare Bucky thoroughly. He leaned down to kiss him again, swallowing the moans that Bucky let out as he deepened the kiss, mirroring the motion of his fingers. With each thrust and twist, Steve watched Bucky's reactions, savoring the flush that spread across his cheeks and the way his eyes fluttered shut in bliss.

"More," Bucky breathed out, his voice a mix of need and desire. Steve obliged, slipping a third finger in alongside the others, stretching him slowly but persistently. The slick sounds filled the room, accompanied by their shared breaths and quiet moans.

Steve's movements became more deliberate as he prepared Bucky, his own desire building as he felt Bucky relax and open up under his touch. When he felt Bucky was ready, Steve removed his fingers and reached for the lubricant again, coating himself thoroughly. He positioned himself at Bucky's entrance, locking eyes with him.

"Ready?" Steve asked, his voice low and rough with arousal.

Bucky nodded, pulling Steve down by the neck for another deep kiss. "Please," he whispered against Steve's lips.

With that confirmation , Steve pushed forward gently, entering Bucky with a slow, steady ease. Bucky's breath hitched, his arms tightening around Steve's neck as he adjusted to the feeling. The initial discomfort melted away quickly, replaced by a deep, pulsating pleasure that made him moan into Steve's mouth.

Steve paused for a moment, allowing Bucky to get comfortable, his face buried in the crook of Bucky's neck, breathing in the scent that was uniquely him. With each controlled breath, Steve began to move, pulling back slightly only to push forward again. Each thrust was met with a soft groan from Bucky, encouraging him to slowly increase his pace.

The bed creaked under their weight and movement, a rhythmic sound that matched Steve's steady thrusts. The room was filled with the sound of their labored breathing and the wet noises of their union. Steve shifted slightly to change the angle and depth of his thrusts, eliciting a sharp gasp from Bucky, who clenched around him in response.

"That's it, right there," Bucky managed to say between heavy breaths, his eyes now tightly shut as waves of pleasure washed over him. Steve focused on that spot, intensifying his thrusts but maintaining the slow, deliberate pace that drove Bucky wild.

Steve's hand found Bucky's hand, their fingers intertwining tightly, grounding each other as they navigated through the increasing heat and desire that threatened to overwhelm them. Bucky lifted his hips to meet Steve's thrusts, desperate for more contact, more pressure.

Bucky opened his eyes, locking onto Steve's with a gaze filled with unspoken emotions and raw need. The connection was palpable, almost tangible in its intensity, and it pushed them further into the abyss of pleasure.

"Steve... I'm close," Bucky whispered, his voice cracking under the strain of overwhelming sensations.

"Me too," Steve replied gruffly, his strokes becoming more erratic as he neared his climax. He leaned in to kiss Bucky hard, their lips crashing together in a desperate meld of passion and need. The sound of their bodies, slick with sweat and other fluids, filled the air along with their moans. "Fuck, I love you Buck, love you so much baby," he rambled.

Bucky lets out a guttural whimper and bites down hard on his bottom lip, feeling like he is about to unravel at the seams. His entire body trembles with pent-up emotion, ready to explode into a million pieces at any moment.

Steve's movements grew more urgent, the bed rocking beneath them as he drove into Bucky with a fervor that matched the storm of emotions inside him. Bucky met each of Steve's thrusts with an eagerness and intensity that only heightened the pleasure coursing through them both.

"Ah—fuck!" Steve's movements became frantic, his hips rolling like a machine as he pounded into Bucky. Each slap of skin echoed through the room as he growled out his desires between grunts. "Can't get enough of you...wanna make you mine forever," he managed to gasp out before losing himself in pleasure once again.

Bucky arched beneath him, nails digging into Steve's back as the intensity increased. "Yeah?" he moaned, barely able to form words amidst the overwhelming sensations coursing through his body.

"Fuck yeah," Steve confirmed with a primal roar, his eyes locking onto Bucky's with fierce determination. "Wanna marry you, make you my husband."

Bucky's breathing became ragged, his body tensing as he neared the edge.

"Yes....Yes...Yes!" His grip on Steve tightened, fingernails digging into Steve's back as waves of ecstasy began to break over him. "Steve!" he gasped out, his voice a strained whisper laden with emotion as he came, spilling between their bodies.

Feeling Bucky clench around him was enough to send Steve over the edge. With a few more deep, powerful thrusts, he followed, releasing with a loud, guttural moan that echoed through the room. His movements slowed as he rode out the waves of his climax, each pulse and twitch drawing another soft moan from Bucky.

As their breathing steadied, Steve collapsed gently onto Bucky, careful not to crush him with his weight. They lay there intertwined in the stillness that followed their storm, hearts beating in sync as they caught their breaths. The air around them was heavy with warmth and love, the kind that could only be forged in the fires of shared passion and intimate connection.

The room was quiet except for the sound of their steady breathing. The sheets were tangled around their legs, and Steve's arm was draped over Bucky's chest, holding him close. Their skin still warm, slick with the aftermath of their lovemaking. Steve, ever the talker afterward, was rambling softly, his voice a soothing hum as Bucky lay back, basking in the peaceful moment.

"I was thinking, you know," Steve murmured, his words a little disjointed as his mind wandered. "About everything we've been through, and how...well, how lucky I am to have you."

Bucky's eyes were closed, a small, content smile on his lips as he hummed in response, not really listening but enjoying the warmth of Steve's voice. But then Steve paused, and Bucky's attention piqued.

Bucky's eyes blinked open at that. "Huh?"

Steve lifted his head slightly, his expression soft and filled with affection. He brushed a sweaty lock of hair from Bucky's forehead and leaned in, pressing a tender kiss to his lips. When he pulled back, his voice was barely a whisper against Bucky's mouth. "Marry me."

Bucky let out a breath, somewhere between a laugh and a groan, his hand sliding up to cup the back of Steve's neck. "Steve, I already said yes, you big lummox."

Steve's eyes searched Bucky's face, his own filled with that familiar, earnest vulnerability. "I know, but...I just...it feels like I've been waiting forever to hear you say it. I guess I need to hear it again....this time less moaning."

Bucky shook his head, amusement and affection coloring his features. "You're such a sap." But there was no denying the warmth in his chest as he tightened his grip on Steve and pulled him in for another kiss, slow and deep.

When they finally broke apart, Bucky smirked, his voice softer, more serious. "Yes, Steve. I'll marry you. I already told you, but if you need to hear it a thousand times, I'll say it a thousand times."

Steve's smile was wide, his heart full. "I think I'll hold you to that," he whispered, settling back down into Bucky's embrace.

As they lay there, the world beyond the walls of their room felt far away. It was just them, tangled together in the aftermath of love and promises. And for Steve, hearing Bucky's simple "yes" was all the reassurance he ever needed.

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#marvel #fanfiction #bucky barnes #james bucky barnes #steve rogers #smutty fanfiction #stucky fanfiction #bucky barnes x steve rogers #winter soldier #steve rogers captain america #the avengers

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