#salty sf writer

[tlaquetzqui]

Whoever decided to steal the name “xenofiction” from science fiction from the alien perspective, and misapply it to stuff like Watership Down or Raptor Red, should have their stupid illiterate face stomped in. Ξένος means “stranger, foreigner”—not animal.

[universallydestinytaco]

SF Episode Ideas

“A Glep’s Eye View”

A whole episode starring Glep, who while dumpster diving finds what appears to be a rare golden coin coveted by a gang of raccoons. After a wild chase trying to get the coin back, gets into a fire ant nest where they’re about to attack until their Queen gives him a pardon, asking how such a handsome critter ended up in their colony. Turns out the ants and the raccoons always have had this beef, fighting over picnic food, so they decide to aid Glep in retrieving the coin. After an elaborately animated fight between Glep + the fire ants and the raccoons, Glep retrieves his treasure only to find out it’s one of those chocolate coins in the shiny wrappers instead of actual gold. Not that he minds anyway.

“Amy Pimling’s Number One Trending Bad Girl Reputation Era Billboard Single”

Pim’s bratty sister Amy makes a music video in hopes of spreading her wings as a singer, and it trends online for all the wrong reasons with everyone lambasting it as “Too safe”, “cliche” and “tacky”, and things get worse when Pim coincidentally uploads an old video of himself at a high school talent show which reveals he was the original writer and singer of the song, resulting in his version getting way more praise and Amy to be labeled a shameless plagiarist so she makes a PR move by doing the unthinkable: calling Smiling Friends and having them help save her from the backlash, unaware that her little brother works there... so they arrive Amy royally chews Pim out and is very impatient and rude with him while they’re cooking up suggestions to help her. Once they finally have had enough of her BS and have her sign some papers, Amy then realizes how mean she has been to Pim and that the whole music fiasco she is dealing with could be a sign that, indeed, karma’s a bitch. If there’s one thing the Smiling Friends themselves have all learned that day, they just can’t satisfy everyone…

“Charlie Hits the Sauce”

A limited edition Mr. Frog-themed menu item made in limited numbers gets released exclusively at Salty’s, causing inevitable chaos that the President himself would be proud of. Charlie desperately tries to get his hands on the sauce without having to give up a fortune so he decides to go on an insane quest to gather all the ingredients necessary to transmutate them together. The next day Charlie shows up to work the next day with his arm and leg replaced with bionic prosthetics and a bowl of dipping sauce with nuggets to taste. Everyone digs in just as a news report comes on reporting that those little green packets caused food poisoning amongst the few who where able to try it.

[simfluencer-network]

Posepack | Tension

Published by NotJustaBook on June 7, 2018

So, maybe you write SimLit and your readers are screaming at your main couple to just freaking kiss each other already. They know they want it, you know know they want it and well… don’t let them. Us writers don’t get off on giving the readers what they want. Yeah, yeah, you promised that they would get together soon, but that wouldn’t be fun. Drag out the pain a little! Watch them squirm! Drink their salty tears and laugh maniacally as the comments pour in!

… Not that you’re like that, of course.

Even then, if you’re here because you want to create some flirty tension, you’re in the right place. I’ve made a very small posepack consisting of a single set of couple’s poses for when your Sims are flirty and close, so close… but not quite there yet 😉

This small set is list compatible and snaps together so you won’t have to finagle your sims too much before they can stare longingly into each other’s eyes. Also, as always, you will probably be able to use sims of either gender – but keep in mind what is says below about heights!

One MAJOR detail to be aware of – I made these with height-adjusted sims in mind. They DO NOT stretch your sims at all. Both of the sims you see in the preview are height-adjusted. I use Cmar’s Height Slider. His is set to 200 and hers to -130 (I believe the numbers are visible if you use MasterController).

If you DON’T want to use a height slider, there’s still hope, though. Pop your guy on an OMSP and set it to approximately 13 centimetres. In this case, I recommend only taking pics from the waist up – I mean, unless your sim has a magical, floating boyfriend and I don’t judge them for that. That’s cool.

Now it wouldn’t be made by me without a few derps, though this time the elbows and knees are quite reasonable. However, the feet are a little too close:

Clippy feet… oopsie.

The faces don’t clip, at least, and you can see how they look here:

Other than that, it’s business as usual. There’s a version with and without list compatibility, as well as a file listing the pose codes so you can copy-paste and not have to sort through your massively bloated poselist (or is that just me??). You’ll find them looking like this in the list:

You will find the download right here:

Download (Box, .zip)

Download (SFS, .zip)

[anneimaginesundertale]

Skeleton Gift Lists

I originally wrote this for Gyftmas last December, but it applies at any time.  If you want to give a skellie a gift, this is what they like!  (I’ve added the Dancetale boys to this list.) 

Sans - handmade anything (you made that for him? he is immediately touched and will keep it forever); space/galaxy things, comfy stuff, socks

Papyrus - superhero things (he likes all of them; you can’t go wrong); action figures; puzzle books/games

Blue (US Sans) - things he can build (legos, jigsaw puzzles, etc.), kids books for his school kiddos, promise to spend some time with him, fun new sprinkles or other food-related things

Stretch (US Papyrus) - pens and paper and notebooks (he is a writer, after all); books; anything sweet

Red (UF Sans) - things he can take apart and rebuild; classic video games; comic books; cool technology; anything chocolate

Boss (UF Papyrus) - scarves; things for Doomfanger; things to help him stay organized (planners, journals, desktop organizer thingies, etc.) 

Black (SF Sans) - books (particularly nice versions of classic novels); things for his dogs (treats, toys, etc.); nice coffee

Mutt (SF Papyrus) - art supplies; plushies;  anything soft and cozy (blankets, pillows, hoodies, etc.) 

Sansy (HT Sans) - anything edible, especially if you made it yourself; stuff for Hope; joke books; comfy things (shirts, hoodies, blankets, socks)

Sweets (HT Papyrus) - cookbooks, cooking related stuff (new mixing bowls, cookie cutters, etc.), food (especially if you made it yourself); puzzles or puzzle building things

Bones (MT Sans) - joke gifts; stuff for his bro; spend time with him, help with new technology, hats

Lucky (MT Papyrus) - music (sheet music he could play, CDs, a subscription to a streaming service...), handmade anything

Smiley (MF Sans) - anything sweet; spend time with him, hugs and cuddles and love, human magic tricks (card tricks, sleight of hand)

Grim (MF Papyrus) - photography related things; DVDs or Blu-ray versions of films (especially with lots of behind the scenes features); 3D jigsaw puzzles

G (G!Sans) - mystery/detective novels; snacks (salty or sweet); fidget toys or puzzle toys (i.e. rubik’s cube); little keychains

Aster (G!Papyrus) - puzzles; notebooks/planners, pens; nice mugs and tea

Comet (OT Sans) - PLANTS AND PLANT RELATED STUFF (potted plant, seeds, bulbs, pots to plant things in, books about plants,etc.), science books in general 

Captain (OT Papyrus) - cool outfits and accessories; puzzles, puzzle books, or puzzle building stuff; plushies (especially animal ones); comic books or graphic novels (he’d really like to learn about Earth culture!)

Break (DT Sans) - comfy things (shirts, hoodies, blankets, socks), spend time with him

Tango (DT Papyrus) - new clothes, dance with him, anything music-related 

Honestly, the fellas would be thrilled with anything you guys give them.  There’s also a lot of overlap.  A lot of the Sanses would love joke books or science stuff.  A lot of the Papyri would love puzzles or puzzle building stuff.  And frankly, the best gift you could give any of them is your company.  They love just spending time with you! You guys are awesome!

[accidentalphenom]

🔥🔥🔥

I think you know all of my gripes 

-I’m actually going to be pretty salty when Case Files anime begins to get ignored or actually becomes forgotten quickly after Babylon anime happens only because Babylon has like all the fandom favorite characters (G*lgamesh, Rintar, Merlin etc.).   I’m just extremely oversaturated by G*l with my top favorite Fate media being FSF & CF just please let me breathe. 

-Also G*lgamesh vs. Enkidu in SF was good only because Narita’s a good writer, but far from the best fight in SF thus far. I don’t really get people’s hype for it and I’m not really happy that fans just like……..read that far and then put down the rest of the series, or just…not even read anything else in it.

-oh oh another SF one. I see some people gripe at it saying how there’s too much powercreep in it, but in my opinion, FGO has way more powercreep than SF ever did.

[rantsaboutsuperheroes-blog]

“Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2” Rides Its Predecessor’s Groove

This article was originally posted on the SF Foghorn May 12, 2017

Matthew Hughes

Staff Writer

3 Stars out of 5

“Guardians of the Galaxy” was one of the biggest surprises of 2014. The movie featured a ragtag group of interstellar criminals brought together by a dangerously powerful glowing gem, and was a runaway success. It was a shock to its doubters and even the comic book characters’ most fervent fans. Now we’ve come to the next film in the series: “Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2,” and while it certainly delivers on most of the elements people expect to see in a GOTG sequel, it tries too hard to be a bigger version of the first movie, and buckles under its own weight.

The story starts off only a few months after the first (how that gels with the rest of the Marvel Cinematic Universe’s timeline, I don’t even know), with the Guardians taking a job to defend a planet of gold-skinned elitists called the Sovereign from an interdimensional monster. Racoon mercenary Rocket (voiced by Bradley Cooper) steals a prized valuable from the Sovereign homeworld, and the Guardians are rescued from the angry aliens (hilariously portrayed as salty gamers piloting drone spacecraft) by a mysterious man who claims to be Star-Lord’s (Chris Pratt) father. Calling himself Ego, the character is portrayed by Kurt Russell in what might be one of my favorite new characters in the MCU so far.

The plot suddenly shifts gears to a completely different storyline that jarringly reminds us that Yondu (Michael Rooker) and the Ravagers were characters in the previous film, though they (specifically Yondu) seem to have been upgraded to secondary protagonists. And through this plot thread, we’re introduced to Stakar (Sylvester Stallone), a sort of head Ravager that excommunicates Yondu from the organization, thus kicking off his narrative arc which will eventually intertwine with that of the Guardians.

If that sounded needlessly convoluted, it’s because that’s how the movie felt at times. Don’t get me wrong, most of the writing in individual scenes is fine. The problem is in how the entire movie comes together. There’s too much clutter. It feels too focused on setting up future movie plots instead of really digging into a main story.

This is a shame, because the central narrative of the movie—the relationship between Peter Quill and both his biological and adoptive fathers—is actually incredibly strong. Chris Pratt portrays Quill’s desire for a father figure believably, and Kurt Russell is just so damned likeable as Ego, even when the movie hints that he is not what he appears to be. He steals almost every scene he’s in and that’s not exactly easy when acting with such a star-studded cast.

Also notable is Ego’s attendant Mantis (Pom Klementieff), who provides some of the biggest laughs in the film, and has surprisingly heartwarming scenes with Drax (Dave Bautista). I actually really enjoy Batista’s Drax, and I’m annoyed that he received next to no real character development in the film. In fact, he was almost useless as a character, even during fights. The other character to suffer this fate is Groot. Look, I know Baby Groot is cute, and he even gets some funny scenes during this movie, but he outlived his welcome as soon as the end credits for the first GOTG finished rolling. There’s only one reason they kept him in a “baby” form for this movie: merchandising.

The last two members of the group, Gamora (Zoe Saldana) and Rocket, deal with extensions of their problems from the previous movie: Gamora having to patch up her relationship with her estranged (and murderous) sibling Nebula (Karen Gillan), and Rocket having to repair his relationship with basically everyone around him besides Groot.

While the pacing and writing is a bit of a mixed bag, the visuals for this film was absolutely are not. Color abounds throughout the movie, drenching most of the landscape visuals, as well as many of the action scenes. The movie’s soundtrack is another winner, even when it indulged in one too many retro pop songs during climactic moments. That being said, there are a few set-piece action sequences set to music that are too entertaining to feel annoyed about the incessant soundtrack.

“Guardians 2” feels like a circus balancing act that tried to spin a few too many plates on its head. It doesn’t feel nearly as self-contained and as tightly-paced as the original, but it still manages to get a lot right.

[tlaquetzqui]

I’m this close to starting a side blog where I do nothing but mock people’s shit speculative biology where they demonstrate they are incapable of considering why things evolve. Think I’ll call it “When De Facto Young Earth Creationists Try Science Fiction” and it’ll involve the image of a hand holding a snake with an apple in its teeth (evoking both Genesis and snake handlers).

The two I just saw: no, aliens would not find sneezing strange. Fucking sea sponges sneeze, it’s for expelling foreign matter from the body. Please explain why alien biology would never have to do that. And no, even aliens evolved from prey animals would not be freaked out by you killing mosquitos. Do you think herbivores don’t kill insect pests?

[tlaquetzqui]

You would think the sense-of-scale issue in Gundam would relate to the mobile suits, but no, for the most part those are relatively grounded. Where they fuck up, though?

Colony drops.

Indirectly, the most famous one: because Zeon kills 90% of humanity (not just with that drop of course), and then, after they lose the war where they did that, any of them survive. They would all be killed. Every single man, woman, and child in Side 3 would be radioactive ash; the Feddies would be very sure to make that happen. I’m not saying that would be a good thing, but it would be an inevitable one.

And then directly, in Gundam X, when they drop a whole Side worth of O’Neill cylinders on Earth, leaving giant craters everywhere. Two things: the Chicxulub impact left one itsy-bitsy crater you have to look really carefully to see; and that one itsy-bitsy impact was enough all by itself to kill 70% of life on Earth.

Enough orbital drops to visibly change the landscape like in the show, and we’re talking levels of destruction somewhere between “not even your Demon will live to creep, blackened, from its hole to mar the reflection of our passage” and “those who truly understand know I have no right to let them live”.

[tlaquetzqui]

“Man imagine having to explain something about humans that would absolutely happen to any other organism, to aliens. I don’t understand that every single thing in biology is ultimately a special case of thermodynamics and that the laws of thermodynamics are the same everywhere. But I am bothering the grownups with my opinions about speculative biology.”

[tlaquetzqui]

Kinda wanna make a sideblog where I shred faux profundity quoted from bad science fiction. I don’t know why it’s so goddamn ubiquitous in stuff by people who think Star Trek is hard SF, but so much of that tier of speculative fiction has these lines that try to sound deep and just achieve the most risible bathos known to man.

I guess that could actually combine with the one where I mock “humans are weird” bullshit by people who don’t know they’re Young Earth Creationists. Can you people all go suck in someone else’s genre?

[tlaquetzqui]

“You can’t travel between star systems in Starfield in real time, you have to use the jump system!”

And this in your view is a problem with the game?

Look if you’re complaining about that I’m taking your scifi-fan card away and then I’m burning it.

Also my dude there are way bigger problems with that game.

[tlaquetzqui]

The best response to people writing smut about your characters remains, as I may have said before, Larry Niven’s: “Kzinti don’t have external genitalia.”

[tlaquetzqui]

Have I mentioned how funny it is that Star Trek fans think the shows from before the Bad Robot takeover were cerebral science fiction?

It was a children’s show and it got more and more childish as it went on, though Deep Space Nine and Enterprise bucked the trend (by being the least like Star Trek of any pre-Abrams series…). I mean it’s hardly the only space opera that’s true of; Firefly is a Disney tween sitcom with hookers and cannibalism, and Farscape is a children’s show that understands how to be watchable by adults too. Babylon 5 is actually the only adult space opera.

[tlaquetzqui]

“This planet in my scifi has a drastically different orbit than Earth, so its climate is [basically the Colorado Plateau].”

Google the setups you describe, so someone from a different terrain on Earth (hola) does not point and laugh at you for trying to pass off their routine existence as shockingly alien. (Also people do have speculations about orbital arrangements that are completely different from anything on Earth. Research them.)

[tlaquetzqui]

It is long past time that scifi art got over the fucking plug suit. And maybe figure out powered armor without just doing a riff on MJOLNIR Mk. V.

A good starting point is to look at stuff like real militaries’ powered armor projects, and designs for future improvements to spacesuits.

[tlaquetzqui]

I just saw someone ask a writing blog for original cyberpunk prompts.

All you need to know about cyberpunk is that the CRPG based on the TTRPG that defined a lot of the genre, has people moving physically to another city for work. Because the assumptions of the genre date to an age when touchtone phones and CDs were cutting edge. At this point cyberpunk is just edgelord cassette futurism.

Cyberpunk was played out before Google was founded. I mean that literally, that is a verbatim description of facts: the Usenet post often considered to be foundational to cyberprep/postcyberpunk was from 1998. That’s the year Larry Page and Sergey Brin got together in Menlo, California, and decided to set the world upon the path to ruin.