#salad cress

[jillraggett]

Plant of the Day

Tuesday 13 February 2024

A tender, evergreen perennial usually grown as an annual, Acmella oleracea (Pará cress, Brazil cress, eye ball plant, novacaine plant, salad cress, spot plant, toothache plant) has culinary and medicinal uses. The leaves are dark bronzy green and the petal-less yellow flowers are produced from mid-summer to early autumn.

Jill Raggett

[roryparnellmooney]

Recipe for Spring Radish Salad with Egg and Garden Cress This is a great spring salad with fresh radishes, hard-boiled eggs, and garden cress combined with a light lemon dressing. 2 large hard boiled eggs sliced or to taste, 3 tablespoons vegetable oil, 2 bunches radishes thinly sliced, 1/4 cup garden cress or more to taste, 1/4 teaspoon salt or to taste, 1 large lemon juiced, 1/8 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper or to taste, 1 pinch white sugar

[rucysims]

Green Salad with Garden Cress Recipe Spruce up a simple salad with garden cress and horseradish. You can use homemade or store-bought vinaigrette. 1 head green lettuce torn into bite-sized pieces, 1 small onion finely sliced, 1/2 cup vinaigrette dressing or to taste, 1 teaspoon prepared horseradish or to taste, 1/4 cup garden cress or more to taste

[bugborglesbian]

Green Salad with Garden Cress Spruce up a simple salad with garden cress and horseradish. You can use homemade or store-bought vinaigrette.

[inky-duchess]

Etiquette of the Edwardian Era and La Belle Époque: Tea

This is a new set of posts focusing on the period of time stretching from the late 19th century to the early 20th Century right up to the start of WWI. I'll be going through different aspects of life. This series can be linked to my Great House series as well as my Season post and Debutant post.

Today will be focusing on the rules of tea with this time period.

Tea was a staple in society, not only as a comforting beverage but as a social gathering beset by strict rules. Etiquette at tea is not only important for guests but is a sign of respect to one's host.

High Tea vs Afternoon Tea

You're reading both terms and you're thinking high tea is the formal version and afternoon is informal. In fact, no. It is the opposite. High tea was actually served far later, about 6pm/7pm and focused on more savoury, substantial dishes. High tea was more of a lower class tradition, designed to fill the stomachs of hungry workers. The word "high" is derived from the tall tables used. Afternoon tea is served at 4pm, designed to fill the gap between lunch and dinner. Afternoon tea is served at low tables with all the guests seated and involve a lighter meal, more nibbles than anything.

Hosting and Attending Tea

Tea is an event that happens every day, it's not an excuse for a snack, it's a ritual. One can have tea served in one's own home or at the home of a friend. One must be invited to tea, one can't just show up and expect to get fed. Tea was typically served in libraries or drawing rooms and done times outside in the gardens if weather permits. One had to dress for tea usually in comfortable but appropriate clothing. Men would wear suits, women would wear tea gowns or a simple gown - keeping their hats upon their head, if they are visiting. Tea was not poured by the footman but by the host or if it is a large party, by one assigned guest. The hostess or designated tea pourer would serve themselves last.

The Tea Set

Tea sets are highly coveted and much remarked upon at tea. One would usually inherit a service (that's what the collection was called) or be gifted it at one's wedding. Services would all match and most households had different kinds, the best usually reserved for important guests.

Teapot: the tea pot held the hot water and tea leaves was was usually made of china and decorated.

Cups: the cups were generally low, shallow.

Saucer: a small plate for the cup to rest on

Tea cannister: where dried tea leaves would rest until needed.

Sugar bowl: was a small container made of china with a cover to protect the sugar from moisture.

Milk jug: a container for the milk

Slop basin: was a porcelain dish used for disposing tea leaves left behind with the dregs of tea.

Tea spoon: small spoon used to stir tea

Side Plate: small serving plate used for food.

As you might have noticed, other than a tea spoon, cutlery is not listed. There would be a spoon for jam and a knife for a scone, most food was designed to be eaten with one's hands.

There is also one instrument not listed here and it's the most recognisable thing at afternoon tea.

The Tiered Tray

The tiered tray is a set of trays stacked upon one another holding on each one, a different course. Sandwiches and savouries were served on the bottom (Favourites include smoked salmon, cucumber, cress, egg salad sandwiches), scones on the second and sweeter delights served on the top (sponge cake, macaroons, pastries etc). One would begin ay the bottom and work one's way upward.

Making the Perfect Cup of Tea in the Edwardian Era/Belle Epoque/Gilded Age

Disclaimers: Let's make one thing clear. Tea is not prepared one way for all. Tea is culturally important across the world and every culture has their own rules about how tea is consumed and served. There's no one right way.

I will be discussing the English way of brewing tea in this post.

As mentioned before, tea is held in a cannister before use. Tea leaves were added to the hot water and lightly stirred.

Controversially for most people, milk was commonly added first.

One would then set a strainer in one's cup, tilting the pot. The strainer will catch the leaves and leave your cup almost tea-pulp free.

With the tea added, one could add in sugar. The trick is not to make a show about it or be too loud. One simply should gently turn your spoon from the 6 o'clock position to the 12 o'clock position. Also, the spoon rests on the saucer when not in use and doesn't stay in your cup.

When drinking your tea, put your pinky down. That's an American myth. Simply lift your cup to you, lifting the cup to your mouth by the handle. Saucers are not lifted unless your cup is far away. Don't slurp it, there's plenty more where that came from.

Etiquette at Tea

Afternoon tea is for light conversation, do avoid heavy topics.

Listen attentively when being spoken to.

Don't talk with your mouth full or stuff your mouth. Typically everything should be polished off with 2-3 bites.

Gloves should be removed at tea because one is eating with their fingers.

If one is leaving the table to go to the bathroom or a breath of air, simply turn to your neighbours and excuse yourself. No explanation needed.

Napkins should be removed from the table and set across one's lap when one is sitting down. When finished with tea, set it beside your plate before you rise.

Also you daub, not smear.

Don't cut your scone but break it.

Don't lick your fingers.

Don't bang the spoon on the side of the cup.

Also there's no dunking biscuits into your tea. It's just not done at afternoon tea.

Never thank the staff for fetching anything - or at very least, don't be overhead doing so.

Always say your goodbyes to the hostess and compliment the tea, even if you had a rubbish time.

Also most importantly, never criticise somebody else's manners. That's the height of rudeness.

[los-plantalones]

Another invasive (but delicious edible) plant that plagues many a garden, especially on the western and eastern coasts of the US: cardamine hirsuta, or hairy bittercress.

This is a winter annual, and can be found absolutely Thriving long after other plants have died back from cold. This is the time they should be picked, whether for eating or for general removal. They come out of the ground easily, roots and all. If you plan on eating them, choose ones that haven’t gone to flower yet, as the leaves become bitter and tough.

Around mid-spring the plant goes to seed, and at that point you’re fucked – the seedpods will literally EXPLODE at the slightest touch. (I’ve walked through places where they were unavoidable, and it sounds like tiny popcorn!) That’s why they spread so prolifically.

Okay, but what does it taste like? Even though it’s called bittercress, it’s not bitter at all. It’s very similar to other plants in the brassica family… if you like mustard, cress, or arugula, you will like hairy bittercress! It’s slightly peppery, a little mustardy, and more mild than the name suggests. It’s best used raw in salads or sandwiches.

Now go munch on/population control some of those cressy bastards.

[louthesawgirl]

What each Saw character would get as a Tesco meal deal (scientifically accurate)

Hello everyone, I decided as my debut long Saw shitpost, I thought I would decide what meal deals different Saw characters would opt for if they stumbled into a Tesco and were a bit peckish after setting up a few traps.

If you’re not from the U.K. or Ireland and are not familiar with the British & Irish institutions of a meal deal, it’s basically a packaged sandwich, pasta pot, salad, bit of sushi maybe alongside a snack item and a drink for a fixed price (it used to be around £3/ €4 but the shops are taking the piss now). Meal deals are considered a treasured institution here and are an indication of your personality. People judge your character based on what you get between two slices of cheap bread.

Here’s what different Saw characters would get for a Tesco meal deal:

Adam (Faulkner) Stanheight

1. Southern fried chicken chipotle mayo sub

2. Doritos cheese flavour

3. Vimto still drink

Judging on how we know Adam is quite an unorganised adult struggling to adult most days, I would assume he opts for high energy foods to keep his tastebuds happy. Cheese, spiced chicken and fruity drinks seem up his street. Plus, Vimto is a very Mancunian thing and if Saw was set in the U.K., there’s no way Adam would not be from Manchester.

Dr Lawrence (Larry) Gordon

1. Eat Your Greens Feta Salad

2. Apple & Grape snack pot

3. Chilled Iced Latte

I feel like because Larry is a doctor, he prioritises convenience but also eats healthily. I also imagine him to be meat free/ vegetarian so that explains the feta & greens salad (I don’t think he’d be vegan though, he seems like he loves proper cheese too much). Larry seems like he’d always be carrying breath mints or tictacs to minimise the cheese or coffee breath- nobody needs a waft of that when being told they’ve got 6 months left to live.

Amanda Young

1. BLT sandwich

2. Walkers Thai Sweet Chilli Sensations Crisps

3. Monster Energy drink (chosen based on packaging colours to match mood)

Amanda is a busy lady planning traps and building contraptions designed to almost certainly kill people. She seems like she enjoys a bit of spice along with classic comfort combinations.

John Kramer

- Chicken & bacon sandwich

- Egg snack pot

- Green smoothie

John seems like he’s mindful of what he puts into his body considering he’s consistently a salt & vinegar crisp away from death with the cancer and all. He’s also a very smart man so he would know the best value for money combination with a meal deal is getting an overpriced fruit smoothie for a drink.

Mark Hoffman

- All Day Breakfast sandwich (triple)

- Walkers Max Salt & Vinegar crisps

- Red Bull

Mark seems like he can’t get enough of bacon & sausage, even though it’s cold and not exactly very fresh. Maybe he’d even have a bit of HP brown sauce with it. Mark would also probably make immature jibes towards vegans and vegetarians because he’s that kind of man. Considering Mark works overtime setting up traps and evading capture, all he’d be drinking by the events of Saw 7 would be energy drinks.

Jill Tuck

- Egg & Cress sandwich

- Arla strawberry protein yogurt

- Bottle of water

Jill is a bit… bland. I’m sorry but I just have to say it. Egg & cress perfectly summarises Jill’s personality as seen in movies 4-7 between two pieces of bread.

Peter Strahm

- Deli style cheese & pickle sandwich

- Smoked salmon sushi pack

- Pepsi Max

Strahm made some good decisions, some regrettable ones and one very very dumb decision during his time in the Saw universe. Just like his track record with making poor decisions, I’d guess Peter would get some supermarket sushi as a snack with his meal deal- not very fresh nor authentic and will leave you wondering why you couldn’t have got a pack of reliable crisps or a chocolate bar instead.

Lindsey Perez

- Feta & sundried tomato pasta

- Propercorn sweet & salty popcorn

- Fanta orange

Perez is a great character and so she would get a meal deal to reflect that. Why do I also imagine Lindsey being veggie?

Eric Matthews

- Meatball marinara sub

- Walkers Monster Munch Pickled Onion crisps

- Red Bull

I feel like this choice accurately reflects Eric. It’s a combination that’s maybe reflective of an immature palette, maybe even a sort of guilty pleasure combination. I wonder if he’d put the monster munch hands (or feet) on his fingers and eat them like that.

Hope you enjoyed my incredibly British saw shitpost x

[theantonian]

What kinds of foods do you think Antony, Cleo and their loved ones enjoyed?

Bearing in mind Cleo was raised Greek, Antony Roman. They were Egypt based but went across Syria, Turkey, Greece.

Antony as a Roman would generally eat various meats mostly pork, poultry, and lamb. Porridge, or puls, made from spelt or barley, was a fairly common meal for the lower classes and Roman soldiers and he would have eaten these while serving in the army. Vegetables and fruits played a role in the Roman diet, however. Legumes such as lentils, beans, and peas were crucial sources of protein too. Cheese made from the milk of cows, sheep, or goats. Simple boiled eggs to more elaborate recipes like omelets or egg-based sauces. Fresh and dried fruits like apples, pears, and grapes were also widely popular. Exotic meats such as peacock, flamingo, dormice, or ostrich were featured at banquets. Here is an article on Roman food:

What Did the Romans Eat and Drink? Learn About Ancient Dining & Diets (mymodernmet.com)

Cleopatra and her relatives would have enjoyed typical Greek dishes. barley bread dipped in wine, sometimes complemented by figs, dates or olives. They also ate a sort of pancake which were made with wheat flour, olive oil, honey and curdled milk, and were served for breakfast. Vegetables that were consumed included radishes, turnips, and carrots. Leafy and salad vegetables were cos lettuce (romaine), cress, arugula, and cabbage. Common bulb and stem vegetables were asparagus, cardoons (artichoke thistle), celery, fennel, garlic, and leeks. Fruit-like vegetables were cucumbers and squash (marrows). Artichokes (the flower part of the plant) and artichoke thistle (cardoons) also were popular at the time. Consumption of pheasant, wild hares, boar, and deer with chickens, geese, and their eggs were common. Here are some articles you should look into:

Ancient Greek cuisine - Wikipedia

Ancient Greek Food: Bread, Seafood, Fruits, and More! | History Cooperative

[weerentheworld]

One of the planned highlights I have for this trip is high tea!

I was hoping for a somewhat social experience so this is one of the few tours I book on this trip.

Annoyingly it doesn’t go great.

The time I booked didn’t have anyone else signed up, so the company offered to move me to an earlier or later time (my choice). While I appreciate the accommodation, what they failed to mention (or maybe didn’t know), is that the only folks on the new time are two very elderly ladies, who can’t really do much walking.

And it’s intended to be a 1hr walk of the gardens, followed by high tea. This is deeply sad since the attached walk was a major reason why I chose this tour. :(

So instead we get a sort of glance at the gardens, with the poor tour guide doing his best to compensate, while we have a very slow walk.

The tea itself was at least very good!

I’m not sure if it was the best tea in town, (there are more than a few options, some of them very unique) but it seemed like a nicely typical one, and was one I could find attached to a tour and that didn’t look to garlic heavy.

We have tea in the Orangery at Kensington Palace, a type of building which normally houses orange trees. But in this case was called such just because its bricks are orange.

High tea comes with multiple tiers (on one of the tea tiers).

The top tier is sweets: “Chocolate orange croustillant Strawberry and rose mini cheesecake Raspberry Victoria sponge Orange choux”

I didn’t have much of the chocolate ones, but the little nibbles I had were very good

The middle is scones with cream and jam: “Traditional scones Cornish clotted cream, blackcurrant preserves (alternative fruit preserves available)”

This tier ended up being my favorite, which I would not have guessed!.

and the bottom is the savory sandwiches. “English cucumber, dill finger sandwich Free range egg mayonnaise, salad cress finger sandwich Cured chalk stream trout, cream cheese, chives bagel Coronation chicken bridge roll Gammon ham, vine tomato, wholegrain mustard finger sandwich”

You also get a tea of your choice: “ORGANIC CHAQUOING GREEN A mellow, classic green tea from Sri Lanka which is known for some of the best green teas in the world.”

I noticed while researching that many places had gluten free, vegan, and/or vegetarian options as well.

According to the guide, tea started as more of a working class thing and got more posh over time. Nowadays high tea like this is a special occasion. But many folks have a smaller afternoon tea version, as their schedule allows.

And tea bags? an accident! Apparently a tea merchant would store his orders out in small lightweight bags with a string and label attached, mainly for ease of storage/labeling. When he found out folks were submerging the bags in water to make tea he was shocked!

Did I get dressed up and wear my bee dress (from Salem) for this? 100% yes

Will I ever forgive my hair for being just awful on the occasion? No.

If I go for high tea again as a solo traveler, I think I’d either a) just go solo (you get your own set of tiers anyway- just go hungry!) and thus have a wider range of menus to choose from. Or b) maybe try and find another traveler to share the experience with (preferably one with some photography skills.)

Do check if you can make a solo booking before you go. Some places seem to be limited to parties of 2 or more.

I think the Orangery allowed solo bookings, and seems to be a fairly quintessential example of a traditional English high tea.

If you’re looking for something smaller, cream tea (tea with scones that comes with clotted cream and jam) is likely a great option!

[gardengarlic]

I made a Hanahaki/flower language post for Yin Yu week and was excited to make one for Feng Xin week too so here it is! (Under the cut)

I picked a lot of flowers that have meanings associated with strength and loyalty. And I couldn't help but laugh at any that had a sexual meaning thanks to Ju Yang. Because he is a god any that mean longevity, success, and glory also fit. Rivalry or Cruelty meanings could be used for FengQing. And any that mean painful recollections or grief are for FengLian. Although you can take these and do whatever you'd like with them! Somehow I ended up with more of a salad than a bouquet for Feng Xin and I think that's so funny.

I hope this post sparks inspiration for someone!

Disclaimer: Most flower meanings are western although when I could I included Chinese meanings.

Chinese Chives: Courage, strength. Chinese: prosperity, renewal, attracts good qi in feng shui

Geranium: fertility, friendship, protection, stupidity

Gladiolus: Flowers of the gladiators, give me a break, I'm sincere, ready armed, strength, strength of character, you pierce my heart

Sunflowers: ambitious, loyalty, power, strength, vitality. Chinese: longevity, good fortune, vitality, happiness, adoration, and loyalty.

Garden Cress: always reliable, power, stability, courage, and daring.

Crab cactus: dependability, loyalty. Chinese cactus general meaning: protection, luck, and prosperity

Cilantro: peace between those of us who don't get along. Chinese meanings: good luck, prosperity, fertility, and abundance.

Arugula: rivalry

Common fig: argument, desire, longevity

Malva/Mallow: consumed by love, cruelty between lovers. Chinese meanings: personal glory, protection, and safety.

Mugwort: declaration against you, happiness, hostility. Chinese: A common medicinal herb. Specifically cited as an ingredient to help with vomiting blood due to qi deviations.

Yarrow: Courage, heartache, love, war. Chinese: healing.

Adonis: Painful Recollections, recollections of life's pleasures, sad memories.

Cardamine: "paternal error." I have no idea what this is supposed to mean, but all I can think of is Cuo Cuo being a "paternal error."

Bonus! Imagine this: Feng Xin sees these (below) growing in the mortal realm after answering a prayer and wants to do something nice or maybe make up after a fight or something.

So he plucks some, brings them back and gives them to Mu Qing who immediately throws a fit because is Feng Xin mocking him? What other reason would Feng Xin bring him a bouquet of Common Broom Flowers? The only meaning of this flower? Sweep.

Anyway if anyone uses any of these ideas in art or fic please let me know!

[impossiblesuitcase]

ALRIGHT so like after rereading the stars above epilouge i’ve been reminded of one of my like biggest head cannon question and it’s when how does kaider announce to their friends they’re engaged? AND I FEEL LIKE YOU WOULD KNOW SO I PUR MY TRUST IN YOU BITCH 🫶🫶

You're no longer Ken! 😂

Ugh, I struggle with scenes like these! It's the same reason I never write weddings or proposals for characters: I'm content to leave those things as unknowns because if I try to boil it down to one idea I always feel it's too important a moment to be captured. So in this case, I think it could go so many ways!

I do love a simple just telling their friends over dinner. Say they all reunite again a few months after Wolflet's wedding. Everyone yelling over the top of each other, arguing to pass the bread rolls, 'stop hogging the salad' and Thorne trying to steal Jacin's seat. Cinder and Kai stand up, waiting for the chaos to subside. It doesn't, so Kai shouts, "hey! listen!" They all fall silent. Kai and Cinder smile giddily, link hands and announce, "we're engaged!" And of course chaos breaks out. Good this time.

Another version is a little more crack.

Cinder just starts wearing the engagement ring around her friends. But since they are all spread out over the galaxy, it's a gradual process. Kaider have fun with this. Once their friends notice, they ask them to stay quiet to see how long it takes for the others. Cinder told Iko personally, so she's bursting at the seams but restrains herself. Scarlet notices first and is of course ecstatic. Wolf doesn't notice the ring but does notice Scarlet's high heart rate as she struggles not to blab to him. He keeps asking if she's okay, then she points at Cinder, and he eventually figures it out. "Oh," he says finally. "Oh?!" Scarlet yells, "how did you not notice?" Wolf admits that he doesn't pay much attention to things other than her. Winter is next. She says something like "oh dear cousin, every little soldier in my frozen palette manufacturing plant is rejoicing at this news." And Cinder just has the lady processing maths face and asks, "so you're...happy for us?" Cress doesn't notice. Thorne does and, after whooping and congratulating them, immediately inspects the ring and starts guessing how much it would sell for on the black market. Cinder doesn't let him near it after that. Cress looks on--confused--and whispers to Kai, "is the ring important?" Kai smirks and replies, "well I suppose, but I hope she didn't say yes only for the ring." Then comes the, "wait, did you propose?" and the squealing. With her sheltered upbringing, Cress forgot which hand the wedding ring is on and didn't pay attention to it. So then all that's left is Jacin. He didn't notice when Winter did, and he didn't notice when they were all together for dinner on Luna. He doesn't notice at the peace ball, or Winter's diplomatic mission to the Commonwealth, or even when they are all playing cards and the ring is adamantly on the display. Months pass and everyone is frustrated waiting for this guy to get a clue. Meanwhile, Thorne likes to make a game out of it: "Cinder is engaged...in a very serious work meeting." "Can you believe Kai is moving onto his second wife already? At his age?" Winter is the most frustrated of all because she can't speak of wedding plans with the one person she speaks to the most. So one day she pulls up a photo of Cinder and Kai, hand visible, and asks, "do you notice anything different about them, Jacin?" Jacin snorts and says, "yeah, Kai looks stupid in those pink sunglasses." "No, they're engaged!" Anyway Jacin knew the whole time. He just never acknowledged it because he never cared. At least, that's what everyone else thinks. But Jacin was having lots of fun with it.

As I said I just can't settle on anything definite! So I want to hear everyone's headcanons for it!

[spacefinch]

Pokemon Incorrect Quotes: Unova Edition

Hugh: *handing out smiley balloons* I have no soul. Have a nice day!

Colress: I don't have one either.

Drayden: Let me see what you have!

Iris: A knife!

Drayden: NO!

Cilan: Fun fact! Blueberries are the only fruit named after a color.

Iris: Star fruit?

Cilan: ♥️ So close! That is a shape ♥️

Colresss: Welcome to physics!

*science project explodes*

*screaming*

Hilda: 🎶 ANNIE ARE YOU OKAY, ANNIE ARE YOU OKAY, ANNIE 🎶

Hilbert: *banging pots and pans*

Hilda: 🎶 ANNIE ARE YOU OKAY, WILL YOU TELL US THAT YOU’RE OKAY 🎶

Teacher: Uh, Cheren, can you read number 23 for the class, please?

Cheren: No, I cannot. What up, I’m Cheren, I’m 19, and I never fricking learned how to read.

Chili: Hi, welcome to Chili's.

Elesa: Hey, I’m lesbian.

Emmet: I thought you were Unovan.

Clay: I wanna be a cowboy, baby!

Alder: Hell yeah!

Clay:  I wanna be a cowboy, baby!

Hilbert: TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN

Cheren: Why are you guys reblogging this in December?

Hilda: TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN

Rosa: TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN

Cheren: It is February, you ANIMALS

Nate: TOMORROW IS HALLOWEEN

Emmet: "Average person eats 8 spiders a year" factoid, actually statistical error. Average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave and eats over 10,000 every day, is an outlier and should not have been counted.

Chili: Oh sorry, I fell asleep while I was waiting on you to make me a sandwich.

Cress: Go back to sleep AND STARVE.

Ingo: Perhaps it is the context in which words are spoken that gives them the power of meaning. *yelling* I LOVE YOU, JOLTIK!

Emmet, banging on pots and pans: I DON'T GET NO SLEEP 'CAUSE OF YOU! Y'ALL NOT GONNA GET NO SLEEP 'CAUSE OF ME!

Hilda: Would you like something to drink? *opens fridge* We have water, milk, juice, Joltiks, Dr. Pepper…

Cheren: Joltiks?

Hilda: Joltiks it is, then.

Cheren: Wait, that’s not what I meant—

But she was already pouring him a brimming glass of Joltiks.

Ingo and Emmet: *in the middle of an intense Pokemon battle*

Hilbert: Can I get a waffle? Can I PLEASE get a waffle?

After said battle:

Hilbert, pointing at the losing Pokemon: He need some milk

Ingo: Road work ahead? Uh, yeah, I sure hope it does!

Rosa (pointing at a flock of Swanna): Look at all those chickens!

Ingo: *filming in selfie mode*

Emmet: (in background) Bop it! Twist it! Pull it!

Colress (grinning): I'M GOING TO JAIL!

Cheren: Tumblr is just talking to yourself but with an audience.

Cilan: That’s called a soliloquy.

Cheren: Found the theater kid. Get em boys.

Iris: Hey OP, how do we know you’re not a theater kid?

Cheren: I’M AN ENGLISH LIT MAJOR, YOUR HONOR

Cilan: Eating chips with chopsticks is unironically galaxy brain. Your fingers don’t get greasy and it lasts for longer.

Chili: Fork

Cilan: Oh, yeah, I’m going to stab my crunchy foods and make them fall apart like an absolute absentminded dunce, fool, clown, jester, like a monstrous moron, an idiot of Shakespearean proportions, a cretin.

Cress: Um, you seem to forget that ‘chips’ can also mean fries. And that’s probably what he was talking about, haha

Cilan: I did not forget anything. I purposely ignore the idea of using British vocabulary to do my part in helping it die out.

Cilan: KNOWLEDGE is knowing that a tomato is technically a fruit.

Cress: WISDOM is not putting it in a fruit salad.

Chili: PHILOSOPHY is wondering if a tomato is a fruit, does that make ketchup a smoothie?

Cheren: COMMON SENSE is knowing that ketchup isn't a smoothie.

Ingo: I went to the store and bought Quick Oats. The next day, my brother came back with Instant Oats. I will not be humiliated like this. I must now find an even sooner oat.

Hilbert: I hope nobody is evil

Ghetsis: >:)

Hilbert: Oh no

Elesa: Don’t post your negativity on a positive post.

Volkner: Electrons

Elesa: I should kick your ass.

Cilan: Being alive is great because there are so many different vegetables you can sauté. But then there are also the horrors.

Cheren: People who say ‘oof’ and people who say ‘bruh’ contribute nothing to a conversation.

Nate: OOF

Hilbert: BRUH

Ingo: Early to bed, early to rise, Burger King burger with Burger King fries

Skyla: Later to rise, later to bed, Burger King burger on Burger King bread

Elesa: Eat at morning, eat at night, I participate in a Burger King fight

Emmet: I slap my knees, I slap my thighs, tonight is the night that Burger King dies

Cheren: I currently have seven empty notebooks and I have no clue what to put in them.

Cilan: Put spaghetti in it.

Cheren: I am currently taking suggestions from everyone except you.

Bianca: Put spaghetti in it.

Cheren: I am currently taking suggestions from everyone except you two.

Nate: Put spaghetti in it.

Cheren: I am no longer taking suggestions.

Roxie: *playing guitar*

*suspicious crashing noises in distance*

Roxie: *plays guitar louder*

Hilbert: Big mood.

Emmet: What does that mean?

Hilbert: Well… it means, me too, I guess.

*the next day*

Ingo: I'm worried about Team Rocket using our subway system.

Emmet: Big mood, brother. Big mood.

Ingo: HILBERT WHAT HAVE YOU DONE

Hilbert: Z is just a sideways N

N: Please stop it

Hilbert: Zo

Elesa: I can't find my earbuds and Target is closed. This is a nightmare.

Burgh: Put a Durant in each ear and they will sing to you.

Elesa: Not a half-bad idea actually.

Emmet: I go to Home Depot

Emmet: I eat the tools

Ingo: Stop it

Emmet: Crumch

Roxie: Is it cheating to teach Toxic to every member of my Pokemon team?

Elesa: Not at all, I'd love to hear them sing it.

Clay: None of y’all know what propaganda actually is, do you?

Hilda: It’s when a British person takes a good look at something.

Elesa: What are you guys going to be for Halloween?

Ingo: Sad

Burgh: Gay

Skyla: Sexy

Emmet: Goblin

Ingo: What if I was evil and ran towards you at very fast speeds

Emmet: My arms are strong, I would catch you and hug you

Clay: Children, this is dirt.

Nate, Rosa, and Hugh: dirt? dirt? dirt? dirt? dirt?

Hilda: Shoutout to all the people who started saying “same” as a joke once in a while but now use it for the most random things like a car honking their horn at another car.

Cheren: Yesterday a book fell off my desk but instead of picking it up, I just looked at it for a second and said “same”

Hilbert: LOL same

Bianca: Why are we like this?

Cheren: Is there anything better than pussy?

Cheren: Yes, a really good book

Cheren: *plays the keyboard*

Hilbert: Who’s the hottest Uber driver you’ve ever had?

N: Ummm… I never went to Oovoo Javer.

*HAS NEVER WENT TO OOVOO JAVER*

Looker: Where’s the best place to buy fireworks?

Hugh: Wouldn’t you like to know, weather boy?

Looker: Where are your parents? Kid’s sketchy, back to you.

Emmet: *screams into jar and then screws on the lid* Everything’s fine.

Cilan: Hi, could I ask how exactly does one accidentally set a lemon on fire?

Nate: Microwave for 40 minutes

Cilan: Why were you microwaving a lemon??

Nate: I read boiling lemons helps cover up bad smells (I wanted to cover up the scent of burnt oranges), but I didn’t own any pots.

Cilan: Did you burn an orange too? How??

Nate: Microwave for 40 minutes

Classroom: *silence*

One of the students: turgle turgle

Cheren: WHO TURGLED

Hilda: Hey everyone, today my brother pushed me, so I'm starting a Kickstarter to put him down. Benefits of killing him would be that I get pushed way less—

Cheren: I get that you're angry, but killing Hilbert is not the solution.

Hilbert: When will Ted himself finally show up to the talk?

Bianca: The final boss

Cheren: Guys, you do realize that TED stands for Technology, Entertainment, and Design, right?

Hilda: I will not let Ted hide behind these lies any longer.

Cheren: I love the word methinks. It’s accurate. Me does think. Thinketh me do.

Hilbert: Methinks therefore me am.

Nate (bragging.): I know every digit of pi.

Nate: I don't know what order.

N: He doesn't know what order.

"Hey besties friendly reminder to drink water, feed your lab Rattata, turn off your evil nuclear generator, change out of your dirty lab coat, go for a walk, and take care of yourself!"

“@evilscientist13”

“@evilscientist13”

“@evilscientist13”

“COLRESS WAKE UP”

“@evilscientist13”

“@evilscientist13”

“@evilscientist13”

“COLRESS THE REACTOR”

(during a game of Uno)

Ingo: Brother, please, no.

Emmet: I’m sorry. I have to.

Ingo: Please, I’m begging you, after all we’ve been through?

Emmet: I’m sorry. [places a draw 4 card] Uno.

N: Any questions before I move on?

Porygon: *garbled electric noises*

N: ... Great. I really understood that well.

Elesa: This is camp.

Ingo: What does camp mean?

Emmet: Like when something is so yass and slay

Emmet: Do you think Joltiks take fall damage?

Ingo: Emmet, what the heck?

*at Drayden’s home in Opelucid City*

The Pokemon streaming service profiles read as follows:

Drayden: “Person who pays for the account”

Iris: “Granddaughter (Free pass)”

Ingo: “Parasite 1”

Emmet: “Parasite 2”

Cheren: How long does someone have to be dead before it's considered archaeology and not grave robbing?

Lenora: As an archaeologist, I find this a VERY AWKWARD QUESTION.

Cheren: Answer the question, grave robber.

Elesa: Carpe diem— seize the day

Skyla: Carpe noctem— seize the night

Emmet: Carpe natem— seize the ass

Ingo: Seriously, if you guys don't stop reblogging this, I am going to carpe someone's neck and break it.

Grimsley: Carpe collum— seize the neck

Cheren: Not all math puns are bad.

Cheren: Just sum of them.

Roxie: There is so much panic right now and not nearly enough disco.

Elesa: Where do bad rainbows go?

Skyla: …

Elesa: Prism. It's a light sentence.

Skyla: *groan*

Hilda: If you don't know the difference between "their," "they're", and "there", your a idiot.

Cheren: Well, this is awkward.

Hilbert: I was born ready!

Hilda: You were born in Nuvema Town.

Hilbert: When I was your age… (tells Hilda something he did a few minutes ago)

Nate: A theif

Cheren: Thief?

Nate: Theif

Cheren: I before e, except after c

Nate: Thceif

Cheren: No

Hilda: (singing) A potato flew around my room before you came—

Hilda, Hilbert, Cheren, and Bianca: AAAAAAAHHHHHH!

Hilbert: I'm nuts about these nuts. But you know what I'm also nuts about? My close good friends!

Hilbert: *gestures to Hilda, Cheren, Bianca, Nata, Rosa, Hugh, and N* My close good friends!

Ghetsis: Remember one time I liked you?

N: No.

Ghetsis: Good, because IT NEVER HAPPENED! *evil laugh*

Cilan: Would anyone like some stew? Would anyone like some stew? Would anyone like some stew?

[mourningroutine]

please give us the carrot recipe 👨‍🌾🧡🧡

thank you for asking, i love you 😭❤

2-3 carrots

fresh garden cress

half a teaspoon each of flaxseed and sesame seeds

1 tablespoon apple cider vinegar (feel free to add less, i like the acidity)

1/2 tablespoon of sunflower oil

salt and pepper to taste

i shave the carrots into thin ribbons, with a vegetable peeler. after that i just add the ingredients together and let the salad sit for around 10 minutes.

the result should look something like this! :)

also tagging @orcgf because you also asked for the recipe 😊🌿

[smuppetshowmovie]

date: February 23, 2023 caption: new props project: The Smuppet Show

I needed some stage business to fill a Dirk monologue and ended up deciding to use it as an excuse to make miniature tea snacks!

Objects in vaguely left to right order:

3 tiered serving tray, lightly engraved with heart god-tier symbols

stained wooden tea table, engraved with a Sburb spirograph-inspired design

fancy cookies filled with berry jam

pot of clotted cream

assorted fancy sandwiches (water cress, cucumber, and egg salad)

macarons (blood-orange and lime)

toasted crumpets

[edwinspaynes]

I've been enjoying ur latest indulgence on each of their meals (Thomastair). What kind of salads and sandwiches would they opt for during day? :))

I think that Alastair would like Shirazi salad, because I headcanon him as finding a lot of Persian comfort food very comforting because he ate it growing up! It's this:

I think Thomas really grows to like it as well.

I also think that both of them really like Caesar salad because they have good taste and Caesar salad is delicious. Alastair makes stabbing-related jokes every time it's served, and Thomas internally facepalms.

Based on vibes, I think Thomas would also like a lot of British classic sandwiches like egg-and-cress. Alastair mocks them but he enjoys them anyway, and Thomas thinks he is super funny.

Alastair teaches Thomas the joys of mango chutney on ham sandwiches, because I love doing that, one of them has to do it for Projection Reasons, and I think Alastair has the broader flavour palette.

[chaotictarlos]

What’s on the reception menu? Zero proof cocktails? Cake? And how does Carlos make sure TK stays fed?

OKAY I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT THIS AND I HAVE ANSWERS NOW.

Drinks:

Wine, Spritzers, and Beer for those who may drink

Mocktails for others

Appetizers:

Wild Mushroom Wafers with Cepe Mushroom, pickled shine mushrooms and tarragon cress

Easy Taco Salad Bites

Veggie Roll-Ups

Main Course (a choice of and a side salad or pasta salad):

Mini Beef Wellington

Mini Quiche

Chicken Satay

Cake:

Carlos definitely makes sure that TK eats. He practically feeds him because he needs to have energy for later.