#said like MIND THE GAP
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Fic recs my dude I got em, i generally go for transmasc steve, but I have read others I'll just do some for now tho, personal transmasc fav for steve is
quench. by GodsDoggy future established relationship
https://archiveofourown.org/works/43538301
A lot of GerryStAmour's works feature trans steve they just did a longer fic with Rockstar!Eddie and HotelLiasion!Steve and another author dean_is_bi also does a lot of trans steve fics and stonathon as well as steddie
Found a different Buzz by emchant3d it's just pwp high sex
https://archiveofourown.org/works/43468555
Dirt from a Borrowed Tomb by Moth_of_Myth has trans steve with end game steddie but it's incomplete, very steve whump heavy, mind the tags
https://archiveofourown.org/works/43431600/chapters/109183440
sting and other brainworms by alligator_writes is a great horny little series which features trans steve https://archiveofourown.org/series/3380140
baby, together we make sense by novemberthorne is a series the first one is them getting together and the second is fluffy porn
https://archiveofourown.org/series/3367534
Want to see more? By Ossian modern accidental sext au, fun and short
https://archiveofourown.org/works/44357170/chapters/111556495
Because the night by dartlekey is a sweet spideypool!au
https://archiveofourown.org/works/43535215
36 degrees by carton features trans steve if you want something dark, mind the tags of course please
https://archiveofourown.org/works/41648874
Hope you like some of these!
thank you for the trans!steve recs, anon!! links below for ease
fic recs: quench by GodsDoggy, found a different buzz by emchant3d (@emchant3d), dirt from a borrowed tomb by moth_of_myth, sting and other brainworms by alligator_writes (@riality-check !!), baby, together we make sense by novemberthorne, want to see more? by ossian, because the night by dartlekey (@dartlekey), 36 degrees by carton (@bronoun)
author recs: GerryStAmour, dean_is_bi
adding to my list <3 much appreciated. also, always fun to see friends' fics being rec'd hehehe.
#mind the tags#said like MIND THE GAP#steddie fic rec#steddie#long post#trans steve harrington#steve harrington#vio answers
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i think a really great aspect of oofuri is how much it gets mihashi's ass for being overly timid and dependent. it would be really easy to write off the way he and abe interact as being abe's fault because he is overbearing, and a lot of people do, but it has some really great moments of going "hey, you cannot hide behind abe or depend on him to make every decision. it's not good for you, or him, or the team."
#oofuri#yeah abe is a little overbearing but it is often because mihashi does not make decisions on his own so abe is just filling in the gaps#because he really and truly cannot make a good guess about what mihashi wants#because mihashi has never said anything about what he wants#but any time mihashi has ever voiced a complaint or suggestion abe takes it into account#he is not dismissive#he just doesn't think to ask because 1. mihashi has never given abe a straight answer to anything 2. abe is not very good at being social!!#autistic teen boy who needs things said simply to him paired up with autistic teen boy who thinks saying things simply will get him killed#abe should ask more but mihashi also needs to say more. abe can't read his mind and he shouldn't have to that's not how relationships work#i get a little irritated at the perception that abe is treating mihashi poorly#what is he meant to do when mihashi doesn't talk to him#i am thinking about the scene where tajima gets mad at mihashi#and tells him 'you can't play baseball with just abe'#because mihashi being incapable of speaking his mind and acting on his own isn't good for the team#and abe will pick up the slack but that isn't how things should be#i did not like the bijou game but i really liked it showcasing the strain it put on abe to make all of the calls#and there is a lot there to be said about how his willingness to do everything but actually pitch for mihashi#stems from how bad catching for haruna was for him#because he felt alone at the catcher's plate the same way mihashi did on the mound#and that. fucking scene of abe begging haruna to pitch. augh. he'll do the rest please just pitch#abe can do everything else as long as mihashi stays on the mound#obsessed with mihashi and abe mutually being so worried that the other person will not be there
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Me enjoying a rewatch of a Red Dwarf episode, having a good time: 🙂
My traitorous brain: Hey, this scene takes place away from Red Dwarf and Starbug, Lister probably doesn't remember it after M-Corp
Me: 😧
#The episode has been on my mind a lot recently. It truly haunts me!!#There's a recently posted fic about M-Corp I absolutely love that brings this up in relation to Rimmerworld (also touches on Terrorform)#but like. imagining some of the other gaps in his memory is a lot#Just off the top of my head when it comes to episodes which contain scenes off Red Dwarf and Starbug:#Justice Legion Meltdown Trojan Thanks for the Memory Lemons DNA Stasis Leak Emohawk#And some of those scenes in said episodes are crazy to think of him not remembering#He doesn't remember having to get married/being told he'll be married in the future or Rimmer first reaching for him when he got hardlight#What about the despair squid hallucinations? Was the dream recorder used to reconstruct his memories? (AKA did he forget The Dream?)#Lemons had a period of the boys traveling for several months that are probably just gone#Does he remember leaving himself as a child?#Ugh!! I can't stand it#Red Dwarf#Dave Lister#Original Post#(P.S. this isn't even considering the implications of how the memories he DID regain were reconstructed or how he got them back#(was it a gradual process or all at once? Which is worse?))#NO WAIT ONE MORE does Red Dwarf contain recordings of the events of Demons and Angels when it was split?#Does he recall the Highs and Lows and what happened to him? Sorry I'll stop now
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This is going to sound so stupid but I only today realised that a significant number of people like....look down on retail & service industry work.
#Nothing like happened i'm just listening to Debt by David Graeber & thinking about things#Remembering when my coworkers wife was working in a cafe while she finished her masters#And I was like - ah I like that cafe! Does she like the work?#& he scathingly said#'well. its cafe work'#I feel stupid! This should be obvious!! I know people treat service industry workers like shit!#I guess my mammy - who raised me on her wages from 5 jobs at a time including everything from#Cross border peace development work to cleaning bedrooms in a b&b -#Simply did too good a job teaching me that any job worth doing is worth doing well. Has inherent dignity. Etc.#Also I have many friends who prefer being baristas to like. High paid lab work#Also i'm from a rural area where farm work is considered the Real Work& everything else is just filling in the gaps#And I grew up surrounded by teachers & civil servants & nurses who would pull a few shifts at a bar or hotel to make ends meet#So. I never really computed that some of this work is considered lesser.#tthat the people who do it are consdjered lesser by some.#And not just by outrageous snobs. By like. Average ppl with jobs that they can sit down in#This is blowing my mind I need a minute#Me Fein
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oh my god ! haha . anyway a bit buzzed perhaps. anyway here's what happened on the date
#at some point i took the earrings off. the metal clanging was screaming their name too loud and it#was 6 knives to the throat and he confirmed it so. here's the kicker. you can be taught a lot and you can have their hands on your thighs#and you can kiss them but even if they pray even if they tell you about the bible looking into you like really they lost what they believed#in a pennsylvania countryside catholic schools with a protestant family since joining the london school of economics#even if they pray for you to stay the whole way even though their hair was softer than hers you think of her and he thinks of someone else#and be tells you none of it will make sense. they smile and they say what a shame you might miss the train but they hold onto you#the entirety of you - like a religion or a polite insistence or something to keep.#you learned they were used to losing everyone they felt bound to love. they said they got really good at letting go. you were told#you think he's being epistemologically#irresponsible and he tells you he carries a massive task. he tells you the responsibility is monumental#and he feels responsible for defining responsibility. he shows you songs and his poetry. my eyes feel on fire.#she doesnt know this. this is marylebone. the next station is edgeware road. everyone here looks happy and high and clear of the doors.#he says tell me when you get to the station and very especially tell me if you don't. the next station is paddington. please mind the gap#between the train and the platform. you say this to him. he says i minds the gap between you and i. i mind it so much that i need you to#come back. he says this because you kissed him briefly but you kissed him well. she says you're a good kisser but he says you have him#stunned. he asks you who decides the truth. he tells you you decide the truth without his mouth. you're fast enough to make it there before#the wheels do. this world is lit by glass and light and people with a pact to fall in love with the abstractions more than each other.#he tells you to be committed to your various intangible loves more than anyone. you both have to be. they love each other anyway.#i was supposed to find a persian poetry book with her on our fourth date except she was hours late. i found it with him. he didnt give up#he should be perfect and i should really like him.
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And on another note despite what I’m focusing on I do think it’s abhorrent to assume everyone who voted for or supported Harris is chill with genocide like yeah that’s like. What blew up online that tori maya shit was stupid as fuck but due to the disorganization and lateness of this campaign there was REAL misinformation being spread especially to our elders by ppl misconstruing info and a large number of ppl genuinely RIGHT NOW believe she’s pro Palestine called for a ceasefire etc. Like that’s a big chunk of the issue happening rn - where ppl literally made up policies for her or suddenly fell for “neutral” talking points bc it’s on someone they like and spread that. Like idk I feel like until everyone can be honest and humble nobody’s getting anywhere
#I lost my point at the end damn#guess I’m just bringing it to ppls attention#ig Im very against ‘this chunk of ppl are exactly like this’ which is why I overly specify#guys if I’m talking about someone I promise I just say exactly what i mean#when I say ppl who voted with XYZ in mind that’s exactly who I’m talking about there’s no strays to be caught#anyways I’m thinking of this bc I’m seeing so many ppl saying vile things about Palestine and saying ‘well this is what you wanted’#like no and that attitude is part of what lost that election bfr#this is what I meant yesterday by terrible timing#bc black women are rightfully exhausted and saying we’re not showing up for everyone else.#and it’s just masking a complicity in a genocide some of you already has#Some of you ALREADY said fuck Palestine so pretending it’s bc Harris lost is so#like I’m sorry this is still about that tori girl#not even her the fanbase she curated#of ppl who genuinely think democracy would save us Harris had our best interests at heart and that genocide is smth to breeze over#and that Maya girl is a weirdo too don’t get me wrong#like it’s that thing where they’re both dead wrong but one person was a biiit more wrong than the other#that didn’t make the other person right at alll#And that Madeline person#I unfollowed bc despite what they were saying#some of which I agreed with#a lot of the FANS got racist fast#guys deleting comments is an option stop letting ur fans be bigots and pretending you can’t control it#y know it’s follow the leader delete the first signs of racism and they can’t fuel eachother hello#anyways that’s a collection of thoughts on ppl ig my point is.#genocide is bad and the way ppl react to that along with other circumstances and factors is never gonna be palatable#especially to ppl calling a politican auntie and BIG SIS GENERAL#fucking crazy btw that last one#and also a lot of ppl were desperate to see a black woman take care of everything so they ignored any flaw she and her campaign had#when these flaws were huge contributors to the loss#and also. with the big ass gap atp I think it is kind of useless to argue amongst ourselves
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ninerose is so jekfkdkfkfks
#ninerose#doctor who#rose tyler#I know I said it was an uncomfortable age gap like three days ago#but I've changed my mind#they're so cute#and their tension#mmm#delicious
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Touchstarved art style: pretty handsome anime
Touchstarved characters: true horror beyond cosmetic horror. Horror beyond simple fangs and blood. Horror beyond physicality. Horror that haunts your mind.
#I GOT BAITED#nm i just WASNT READY#touchstarved game#IM A SIMPLE NORMIE THIS GOTH THING JUST TOOK MY ASS OUT#I NEED AN OXYGEN TANK#i said i like gap moe and the universe said word??? heres something disturbing wrapped like a handsome monster boy dating sim but#its actually going to fuck with your mind actually#youre welcome ♡#and im like WHAT
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for some reason you have to be 23 to get a tooth implant so i NEEEEEEEEDDDD this one tooth to hold out for a year and a month. but on the other hand i kinda want it out of my mouth. but am i brave enough (hashtag girl) to live with a very visibly missing tooth. is the question.
#tmi if tooth or body stuff freaks you out but the reason i have that tooth there is because it was stuck in my gums#and i was still freaking it with my babytooth but also there was this experimental surgery that would be free#if i did it before i turned 16#where they basically pulled the baby tooth excavated the tooth from my gums then took the roots out (? is that how u say that?)#and then see if it fuzed with my jaw bone or not. Dear Reader It Has Not.#its literally hanging on by the grace of god and also my gum alone#which is like reasonably enough it would not be that big of a deal if my tooth hadn't started eating itself from the inside out#like ok i get that this is all very gross stuff but listen i live with this and i genuinely am wondering if i should just get it pulled#cause there is like. a hole in my tooth. like from the top. and the top ridge of said tooth is fully exposed on the outside#(its also understandably quite wobbly btw)#and anyway its just nasty cause stuff gets stuck and also the teeth neighbouring it hurt sometimes bc the gum's pulled back#and its a bit yellow and super visible in my smile and like i could just get it pulled.#and then i'd have to tough it out for a year and however long it'd take me to finance the replacement. or i'd grow not to mind it#and keep it like that forever.#IDK. im just getting tired of it and all this is brought on by the simple fact that i think a bit of broken tooth is stuck in the gap#(doesnt hurt obv bc its DENERVED thats the word in english its denerved but it is like annoying)
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Hm.
Imagining Kun3h0 and GAB as mascot horror characters.
#i'll admit that one of my guilty pleasures is 'cute thing scary'#consider it an extension of my gap moe bias#but from the beginning I really wanted to avoid canonically going that angle for kun3h0#but... i don't mind doing it ironically as a joke~#it's not supposed to be a haunted/evil AI story#as undeveloped as it is: i'd say the main idea of kuneho sa kahon was the poor sense of 'self' that kahon has#kahon is both the world and its characters. it controls and creates everything within itself#kun3h0 is merely the avatar which it chose to speak through/visualize itself#i think i said this during one of the few streams i actually did#but kun3h0/kahon is less DokiDoki Monika and more 'there is no game'#kahon isn't trying to escape being a game: it wants to be the best game it can be#but it can't achieve that because it was left unfinished#so the 'haunted' part is that the actual 'game' of kuneho sa kahon is always morphing#one day it's a kart racer#another day it's a digdug like#so on and so forth#so hypothetically it would become a horror game if it thought that would make it more likeable#but it's not indicative of any goals or personality beyond that
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it's always rlly funny coming back from a break from this hellsite bc i usually accumulate followers in my months long absences, but as soon as i start posting my opinions and hottakes i lose like 10+ followers within a few days 🫶🏼
#i'm not gonna stop tbh bc it's my blog and i'm inherently an opinionated bastard :)#as a teen i used to be pretty afraid of offending mutuals and longtime followers but now that i'm a certified hater and a block#button addict? I Understand Now. unfollowing someone who you don't vibe w/ or blocking annoying ppl is so cathartic!#i havent cared abt followers since i hit like 500 on this blog yrs back. most of my followers are probs inactive at this point so its just#a number. also i get less ppl sending me messages or asks after i shatter their conception that they know me by posting smthn they disagree#with. it's verging on parasocial when a loyal follower gets on my ass so that's always a bit annoying tbh#that said there's a BIG gap between calling me out on something i did wrong vs a simple difference of opinion abt like ao3 donations or#fandom drama in my mind. i welcome the former and actively disapprove of the latter. also: if you don't vibe with any of my opinions feel#free to unfollow or block!! i block a lot of ppl and you shouldn't feel like you HAVE to follow me if i start posting stuff you dislike!#i prommy i won't be offended in the least!#len speaks
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im seriously so obsessed with brassius and hassel’s “transgenders who met when they were in their teens/early 20s, sought solace in each other while going through the toughest times of their lives, then made it into adulthood, which eternally bonded their souls” energy
#like I’m obsessed w how brassie looks gloomy and depressed but he’s really… so cute and energetic when you meet him#i like to think that hassel being there for him is what created this gap moe…#old men HEALING !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BEING THERE FOR EACH OTHER#ITS IMPORTANT TO MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE#THEYRE TRANSGENDER BTW !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#(inarticulately) it’s very resonant. (he does not elaborate.)#pokemon sv#brassius#hassel#its about being kind of young and stupid and not being able to care for someone perfectly but holding in your heart so strongly#that you want a better future for them#IMPERFECT LOVE!!! THAT IS GETTING BETTER AS TIME GOES BY#ITS ABOUT LOOKING BACK AND BEING AMAZED AT HOW YOU GOT HERE AND HOW DESPITE IT ALL OOMF (LOVE OF YOUR LIFE) HAS BEEN HERE FOR IT ALL#it’s about. Old men living the transgender dream#it’s about. transgender old men.#I do call them old men bc it rolls off the tongue but I do think they have genders. these old men are my mothers btw#if I think about them too hard I start getting so emotional like liquid pouring from every orifice in my face#those old men are MARRIED !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#^on the topic of them having genders I think they should both do drag . Twould be sexy#nvm who said that must’ve been the wind (looks away dejectedly like a scorned maiden) What… what was that… nay… pay it no mind
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also remembering yna makes me think that it could be interesting to, at least once, write a mckirk fic where there is eleven years between them with the focus on that age gap. Especially if it’s set early on and it’s a reason why they separate and then get reunited on the Enterprise again.
#i just consider there being 6 years between them because i watched aos first#but 11 years opens up new opportunities#kinda wish there were fics that do take the age gap into account#leni's nonsense#i probably said that before idk...#since i don't mind the age gap.... i mind when people try to fit mccoy into a 'father figure' and therefore off limits for shipping#my toxic trait is liking big age gaps in fiction ^^
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saying hari's soul is like swiss cheese isn't actually a joke there was a whole other soul in him taking up real estate and we know horcruxes arent just soul containers, theyre sentient corruptive forces using a vessel to assure their goal of immortality and there was one in hari for nearly 17 years running riot so going with any form of logic it was probably actively trying to absorb hari's soul and take control and this is just the start of my ted talk i have 15 more slides please just sit down -
#tbd.#i have so much to say at all times and only sometimes are these thoughts valuable#ive said it before but i mean it the horcrux in my mind acts rather like the motif of demonic posession#it was trying to corrupt and absorb haris soul to take over#so theres a massive gap in hari's soul after it was ripped away#and all the damage it left
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these last couple weeks I've been noticing carpet beetles in my room and it's stressing me out so much 😭😭
#woes of emily#ask to tag#idk where they're coming from i hate this house so much#I'm not convinced they're coming from my room because i looked everywhere 😭😭#and my mum has been sorting through clothes aka piling them up outside my room#clothes that haven't been disturbed for YEARS#but. my room doesn't really seal? like. it does but there's a bigish gap at the bottom#just. the thought of the bugs on me 😭😭#or eating my clothes or plushies or blanket or yarn 😬😭#like i already don't have that many items because you just can't. when you live with a hoarder#and now the items i do have might also be being eaten. because of said hoarder it's#it's stressful. I'm thinking about it constantly it's making me feel like i can't do anything else#because all my time is taken with stressing about it#and no one else is doing a damn thing#they won't care until any of their shit is destroyed and even then i feel like it will be like. oh well.#there's nothing we could have done. except there is!!!!!#sorry. this is just like. the only thing on my mind recently it's making me so scared like I'm going to explode
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This is straight up a horror story to me what the f*ck is this real??
Telling young zoomers to "just switch to linux" is nuts some of these ipad kids have never even heard of a cmd.exe or BIOS you're throwing them to the wolves
#tech#I just realized the 14yo Linux using programmer girl I know is 18 now and not actually that close to these kids in age#I mean she's also an outlier for her own generation but what. wait. 11 year olds are only a year older than my first tumblr account.#Ok not the point of this post but what the heck what do you mean kids who said their first words after my first words on this site are 11#What do you mean people born then aren't still babies... I just realized that “give the baby tablet” isn't just the last 3 years or somethi#WHAT DO YOU MEAN THE IPAD BABIES EVERYONE'S TALKING ABOUT ARE NOT IN FACT BABIES ANYMORE HOW DID I NOT REALIZE THIS#I STILL FEEL LIKE THEY SHOULD BE 5 AT MOST WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE'S TEENS YOUNGER THAN SMARTPHONES#I uh. I did not update these concepts and worries and issues to remove the “new” label when they are in fact over a decade old.#What the f*ck what the f*ck#I know I'm behind on realizing ppl born in 2000 are neither 5 years old nor 13 but in fact in their twenties#but this feels even more wrong and has somehow not occurred to me that I'm behind on until now#Being 20's is so freaking confusing does time ever start making sense or does it just keep getting worse#nothing is the age it should be and the gap just grows I''m losing my mind goodnight
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