#ruining my damn shitpost

[bubblegum-gf]

happy slightly belated 3 years of rtcler

[yuyu-bubu]

my disappointment is manageable and my day has been mildly inconvenienced

[byanyan]

s/b: genuinely cares about them, tries to help them & improve their circumstances despite them being a shitty pain in the ass who intentionally causes problems & often takes advantage of the kindness

byan:

[fairymint]

nope, not here. please leave a message on a corpse.

the message is that the gay uprising is gaining more power. the world is healing. chromnation for mages everywhere.

[mourningdewey]

retired from sturges new career in zeke

somebody take my laptop away from me it's rotting my BRAIN

[cock-cage-of-mensis]

Posting Barbie spoilers untagged WILL get you unfollowed

[pastrydragon]

The BG3 Beef I wanna see shitpost

While I do love the idea of Tav/Astarion/Karlach/whoever getting more unique mean dialogue with Ulder Ravengard, especially when he has the audacity to take up space in your camp like that instead of someone cooler like Barcus or that one bullied hyena, I want very specific flavor text that you'd only get in the epilogue party if you pick a specific ending even more.

I think if you romance Wyll as Gale or Gale as Wyll and then you don't go to Avernus, I think it would be totally galaxy brain to have dialogue in the epilogue that reveals Ulder Ravengard and Morena Dekarios fucking DESPISE one another. Because they absolutely would.

We never get to meet Morena in game but you can tell from what Gale and Tara say about her and Gale's... Galeness that she is at least a part time passenger on the "Fuck you my child is fine" train. Her sweet little boy? Commit evil deeds? Never! There has obviously been a mistake. I mean she indulged that "Gale Of Waterdeep" nonsense and when Gale summoned a full on Tressym after being explicitly denied a kitten as a child, she just let him keep her. No repercussions.

And then her sweet boy brings home another sweet boy who is probably EXACTLY what she pictured Gale's partner should be like.(Because Wyll is the damn blueprint for "Guy you could bring home to mom") Wyll is ridiculously sweet to Gale, he's the perfect gentleman, he's very open to the idea of giving Morena the grandchildren she's been nagging Gale about in the very near future. Pinch her, she must be dreaming!

I cannot imagine her reacting to Wyll's backstory with any amount of empathy towards Ulder, obviously that man is a cruel psychopath to throw poor Wyll out like that after "a tiny misunderstanding" and Wyll is just too good of a son not to see it. Which is partially true, Wyll is definitely still in some kind of denial stage over what his father did but that's not the point of the post.

Then there's Ulder who probably thinks Gale is... Fine. He's not someone he ever would have pictured for Wyll. Gale is a babbling oddball, he has chronic foot-in-mouth disease and has only ever met the pointy end of a sword. But he can't say anything because Gale saved him, his son, and Bulder's gate, and a small army of tieflings, and apparently a bunch of mushroom people and blah blah more reasons he can never have the moral high ground blah. He's undeniably stuck with this fucking wizard, and his nightmare of a mother.

Morena firmly believes that since the Ravengard manor is technically Wyll's now, then it's also Gale's and thus is now hers as well. When I say she would walk through the doors like she owned the place I mean it very literally. Where did Ulder's old helmet display go? "They were rusty and it was ruining the wooden shelves, besides these enchanted swords go better with the new drapes we had to get, I don't know how you didn't notice how moth eaten they were getting." Everyday he wakes up and something about his own damn home has been changed to make it look more like a wizard tower. She doesn't even live here most of the time!

And it doesn't stop there, not at all. No this women has to make sure his son doesn't live there full time either. Every holiday and birthday she has to send Gale a letter about how much she misses him and you should visit so you can take a break from all that(Very important!) work and how she already has the venison just for Wyll.

And every time he's forced to interact with this harpy she looks at him with a sweet smile on her face, honey in her voice and the burning hatred of a thousand suns in her eyes then somehow managed to insult him five times in one sentence without ever explicitly insulting him. This women is a devil from Avernus sent to punish him for his sins and she's even won over the grandkids. Obviously that women is a manipulative psychopath for using her control over Gale to manipulate his son. Which, yeah Gale not being able to say no to his mom has contributed greatly to this and if Wyll knew what healthy boundaries looked like he probably wouldn't have put up with it but he doesn't so here we are.

Let these two be the Tom and Jerry style B plot to BG4 is what I'm saying.

[inbabylontheywept]

So. So. I have a horrific backlog in my inbox, and past attempts at answering it have generated more asks. Generally at a higher rate than I could answer the asks. Exceeding escape velocity. And I've been mulling over how to solve this, and my idea was to create a super-bus answer post. It'll be a little lengthy, so, you know. Click read more at your own risk. Roll them dice.

Well, you clicked it. God speed and god bless.

--- @meowserita says

I feel obligated to tell you i stayed up till four am reading a bunch of you stories, because they're incredible. Also feel like saying that the only other times ive stayed up this late in recent memory is when i was binge reading one piece so take that as you will. We'll see how much i regret this but odds are i wont like i didnt regret staying up reading one piece

Hahaha! Ha! Oof. I am extremely flattered and awed and impressed but also, my stories are going to be there tomorrow, and the next day, and maybe forever depending on how this whole "civilization" thing pans out. So. Sleep more. But also thank you for being a mega fan.

I had like, a week long binge of Naruto in middleschool that was awful. I didn't even like the show that much. People recommend anime to me now, and I feel like a former alcoholic turning down drinks at a party. No thank you, there's a 99% that will simply help be relax after work one day and a 1% chance that will ruin my life and I'll catch myself unironically saying "believe it!" years later, and I just can't take that chance. I have too many people depending on me.

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Anonymous says

i see you are also from Utah. do you have a favorite swig menu item

No. I've never actually been into a Swig. There were a few soda shops back in AZ, but I never really got them either - I'm still not sure how a gummy shark in a blue soda is supposed to make it taste better.

My poison is generally gas station stuff. Slurpees are amazing, and I also like their little pickled sausage snack things. Probably literal poison, but they call to me.

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Anonymous says

four more messages in my head. four more tests of sanity.

hm. troubling. hope you pass.

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Anonymous says

yooo “fireflies infinity mirror room” mention!!! i lived in Tempe for a few years…one time i was making my way down the escalator from the PHX skytrain and there was a group of like 20-30 Mormons (?) at the base of the escalator waiting there to welcome out-of-state Mormons to some sort of Mormon convention in…well, Mesa, presumably? google is now telling me it may have been for the Easter pageant.

That does sound likely. My grandpa was actually in charge of the easter pageant for a few years down there - I actually broke my arm on the little pony Mary rides to Bethlehem. I was trying to keep my little brother and sister on it by using my arms as a seatbelt, but when they fell off anyway, I just had to kids land on my arm from 6 foot drop and got blessed me with a third elbow. I had some crazy ideas on how to become a professional baseball player with it, but my dad insisted we go to the hospital to do drugs, and when I woke up they fixed the damn thing. Could've gone pro.

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@synapticwanderer says

hello! just wanted to say I'm a big fan, your stories make me laugh and sometimes cry and sometimes both, sometimes at once. when my partner asks me what I'm laughing so hard at I read them to them, and sometimes I just go read them to them anyway. thank you for sharing your delightful way with words with us, and I hope you don't mind that I've got notifications on for your posts (you and I think three other writers at the moment) anyway, have a great day!

I don't mind! I hope I haven't ruined that privilege, actually, I shitpost more than most people think. I like mixing happy and sad as well as silly and earnest. But. Yes. A lot of shitposts.

Anyway, thank you for the comment! Happy trails.

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@funnynamedottxt says

I kept hearing about your wrestling post, and then I saw the word “bisexual” when you were talking about it, so, needless to say, I sought it out immediately.

And, while this isn’t technically part of the actual post, in that reblog where you were talking to that one dude about sexism and societal issues and shit, you made some pussy joke about Lake Michigan and that may just be the best thing I’ve read all week.

Sorry about the run on sentence btw, I know it probably deeply hurts the writer in you, but I find it funny and am too lazy to self-censor sooooo

I'm glad you had a good time reading it. I don't know which gender I'd imagine the great lakes as to be honest. I just know that their thing with Michigan is beautiful and would be very distracting should I ever become an astronaut. I don't want to make fun of people for wanting a better world, and I would actually say I did a botch job on my response. Didn't realize it until several hundred people got mad at me. I know I write well, and the catch .22 of that is that people assume that my ability to read the room is probably higher than it is.

Anyway. I don't fault them for getting mad. Not my finest hour.

And I'm not a snob about run on sentences by the way. English teachers want to make rules about how you write and rules to follow, but that's because they need to grade by rubrics for it to be fair. It turns an art form into something mechanical though. Just make it natural and the rest comes after.

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@00x7 says

Hi. I hope you're doing well.

I had read your wrestling story. I had not laughed so hard in a great many years. I thank you for this, though I am also sympathetic to your misfortunes.

There was enough going on that I was naturally curious if you were or are Mormon, a curiosity born from being someone who grew up as such myself (something that being queer doesn't really bump up nicely against, though you hardly would need to hear such a thing from me), and which visiting your blog quickly answered for me.

Of course, scrolling down for two seconds immediately had me realize that you were also the kid with the grandpa and the worms. I had read the worm story before, but visiting somewhere and realizing it was you was a nearly transcendent experience. My third eye was rather forcibly opened. What a storied life you have had.

Anyway, as an amateur writer, I'm very happy to have found your blog. We don't know eachother, but your words resonate with me.

Whenever you read this, I hope you have a good one. Thank you.

Oh! That's my favorite thing - when people like two different stories with very different tones. It's kind of a would you love me if I wasn't beautiful sort of question - would you like my writing if it wasn't purely silly? And it makes me happy when the answer is yes.

I actually wandered through your blog to try and find your writing, but I didn't have much luck. I'd love to see some, if you're willing. Send me a link if you keep it on another platform. I couldn't do a critique if I wanted to - all my writing knowledge is just gut level stuff that I don't know how to share - but it's just a fun way to know people. And sometimes, I see a style and I go ah, I can pick a few shiny bits off this and wear them around.

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@turtletotem says Your bio says to tell you if we write, so, new follower here, and i write! Lots of fanfic (links in bio) and also original fiction under Shelly Greene and Elizabeth Belyeu (both on Amazon). Feel free to check it out, but I won’t take it personal if you don’t, lol.

I checked your pages on AO3 for this, and alas - No snippets for me first. You write books and novels, which is something I've always aspired towards, and never really suceeded at. I had this view when I started writing short stories that I'd eventually writer longer stories and serials and in fact I just got better at writing short stories. Which isn't much of a tragedy, actually, but it's a road I haven't really moved forward on yet. Writer to writer.

As a reader, I already have several books I've promised to read people. If you have any shorter works (less than 5k words?) lob them my way though! c

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Anonymous says

Just read your post about Atlas Shrugged (my condolences, comrade) and I must, simply MUST ask if you've ever heard of The Cobra Commander Dialogues? It asks the very important question "what if Cobra Commander was there and found this all at best inane and stupid, and at worst it offended his villainous sensibilities?" As someone who hasn't read the book OR watched the cartoon I found it very entertaining!

I just took a peeksies at those - they're beautiful. Dialogue is a great weakness of mine, and it is hard not to be a little envious of this writer. Thanks for sharing this with me.

For the curious

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Anonymous says

Your story about the breakup and the olives and the Slim Jim's and your dad made me cry -- not like, tear up, but an actual good cry for a couple minutes. I don't totally know why I reacted like that but I definitely felt better in some way afterwards. So, thanks. I think I'm gonna remember that story for the rest of my life.

The story stuck with me both because everyone involved was good. My ex's dad, the neighbor, my dad - everyone was doing their best. And it was true, wasn't it? Brains are good at remembering bad things. It's a breakup. And it hurt like hell. But the pain of that memory carries with it this feeling well, even when things suck, people don't. I also liked this view of my dad parenting so consciously. It wasn't a background thing to him. He thought a lot about what he was doing, and what he was saying, and how he was treating me. I owe him big for that.

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Anonymous says

What did you do with the left shoes after your date?

So, I think teenagers like being able to convey fuck you, I do what I want through their clothes. There are punk scenes for that, and goth, and other things. My way of doing that was just dressing aggressively badly. Mismatched plaids and sports jackets meant for people half my height and twice my width, purchased from goodwill, and basketball shorts mixed with knee high socks and on and on. That was part of my teenage rebellion.

Anyway, I added the shoes in and just wore mismatching shoes to make the outfit worse, both because it was a fashion crime, and because it was a litltle inside joke with my friends who knew the story. I wound up losing them over the years because I would use the left sets as makeshift projectiles.

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@galapagos-spinch says

I just wanted to compliment you on your story about wrestling a girl in middle school, you're a fantastic writer

Thanks. I have some regrets about that story, but it was fun to write, and it from a craft standpoint, i am proud of it. I appreciate the comment. :)

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Anonymous says

equality is when young boys aren't allowed physical boundaries i guess

Eesh. We're getting to wrestling asks. Look, when we all signed up for wrestling, we signed up to wrestle girls. It's part of the sport. If your boundary is to not wrestle girls, the way you maintain it is by not signing up for wrestling. The point of my response, which I did not convey clearly enough, was to ask for forgiveness for failure. A middle school boy falling short of the right thing is different from a middle school boy seeking to do the wrong thing, and as a bar, it's...

It's the kind of thing I'd hope people would go, Well, they're shits, but I can't hate them over it. Don't defend us as having done the right thing - we did not. Just, have some grace for the weakness of teens. They're still growing, and if you put too much pressure on them, they'll crumble. And we crumbled.

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Anonymous says

Hey there! Sorry, not actually a question, just wanted to say I've seen posts of yours reblogged before on occasion and I finally started following you because you're a gifted storyteller and your stories are hilarious, poignant, or both!

Oh! A relief. This is so nice. Thank you. Hopefully you read this. Maybe I should turn anonymous asks off or something going forward if I set myself on doing more of these super-bus replies.

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Anonymous says

i am crying with laughter at your stories. the way you tell them is perfect, please never stop

I'll try. I had a several month period of no writing after burning out on HFY. Wasn't sure how to make a genre change. I'll probably have more periods of quiet like that, but to be honest, my writing is probably my favorite thing that I do. I like engineering, and I'm pretty good at it, but I love this, and I am very good at it, and in periods where I don't write it feels almost painful.

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@auronlu says

just sending you some gentle love from an older queer person.

My parents moved to Utah after I went to grad school. I am eternally grateful that my dad turned down that promotion the first time, when I was about to enter high school, because I didn't want to lose my friends and move to Utah and go to school there in the 80s.

So I escaped, but I've seen a little bit of what you had to go through and I've heard from some of my mom's friends that she's made there how hard it is when you don't conform. I'm glad you were able to escape and that you have your own life now.

I bet that girl remembers you and that when these topics come up, she's not as willing to throw people like us under the bus without question.

you did the best you could in a very difficult situation, and by being you, you helped some of the next generation realize the lines they're told about queer people may not be true.

There may have been a closeted or questioning kid in that class, reassured by your example or simple refusal to show prejudice. you don't know what positive impact you had on those kids, but you went in with the best intentions you could and I have a feeling you did more good than you know.

take care and have a good life

( note: my main blog is actuslly @sepdet )

This is actually one of the earliest asks that I didn't want to answer because I didn't want to lose it. For anyone else looking, they're talking about a story I told about teaching primary as a Mormon.

I hope she does. I don't think anyone in the ward ever actually knew I was bi - I kept that very close to my chest. Even after I left. The kids certainly didn't. But they knew that I loved them very much, and they apparently felt strongly that I was a good person. I think the lesson I gave them was that a person can leave the church and still be good. I hope that serves them well.

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@karmaajr says

UR A FUNNY GUY 🫵

aw yissssss

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@abisexualfrog says

Hello, I just wanted to say that I really like your stories and the way you write, your style

Sometimes I’m in a bad mood and then I go read a few of your stories -I especially like the ones at your work- and it cheers me up because of how funny it is. (The fridge story? So good)(oh and the water balloon and and and… endless)

Im not super good at compliment because well English isn’t my first language and all that but I figured I could still tell you, can’t hurt.

So yeah I really really enjoy your writing!! It’s so good!

And not just the stories of things that happened to you, the other ones too, they are also very good

This is another one of the ones I kept because I didn't want to lose it.

Thank you for reading my stories. Your english is fantastic. And it is rare to get comments on my old fictional sci-fi pieces - those were kind of my baby's-first-steps. If you read those you are in deep, and I am incredibly touched.

I'd hug you if I could.

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@rockinhand says

the red bun on those burgers was actually dyed via Beets. i tried it when it was around and it was unremarkable

I know what this is referring to. Surprisingly. But I will leave it be and just enjoy have this remain esoteric bordering on arcane.

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@newkittypoom says

i saw your reblog on that falin fanart and i was like "wait. this is the 28 eggs snake guy?" and i came from the post about your wrasslin days and i saw you answer an ask about being ex-mormon and well. im definitely following the blog for your writing. thanks for sharing these stories!

thanks for commenting! It's flattering to get recognized online. Means my writing voice is distinct. Got a little niche and I'm thrivin' in it.

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Anonymous says

I'm sure someone must have pointed this out by now, but you weren't dating just because she thought you were dating. If that wasn't the kind of relationship you thought you were in, you weren't dating. She was just being presumptuous. You didn't "accidentally date" someone. You can't. Dating is a mutual, consensual thing.

Yeah. Yeah. Phrasing and all.

--

@nbspacegay says

(1)

Hi I read your dating stories they are hilarious. I am spiritually holding hands with you because I too am terrible at dating. I accidentally pterodactyl screamed at my boyfriend when he told me he loved me once. I did also love him. I just panicked, screamed and then quite literally sprinted away. I also did not have the excuse of being in high school because I was in university.

(2)

if you so choose you can publish that last ask, i sent it becuase i thought you and your followers might find it funny

(3)

also sorry for sending you three messages like a lunatic, but also feel free to ignore it

I haven't been ignoring this, it just got buried and then I panicked and it has been crushing me like an ancient marsh, squeezing out all my peaty-bits until all that was left was an ultra-flamable bed of hydrocarbons.

Pterodactyl screaming at your boyfriend is a power move. You should do it more often. I am going to answer more questions that way. I had a customer with a masters in geology ask me why I could not provide their specified sample rate, sample times, and sample counts, and I had to explain to them that you can actually only pick two of those numbers, and the third just happens, and that the numbers they gave me did not work that way. It's like saying "I need to drive 50 miles, and I want to drive at 15 mph for two hours." I'm like, yo, go faster, or drive longer, but you have given me a multiplication problem that does not work. And they kept arguing with me, despite the actuall oscilloscope screen telling them, hey, bozo, that math does not math, and I kept trying to reason with them, when in fact I should have just pterodactyl screamed.

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Anonymous says

When I saw your blog title my first thought was that it's a reference to psalm 137 (it's on my mind since it was just tisha b'av) and was wondering why a nonjew would do that, but then I realized you're a fan of Babylon so it's probably a reference to that. And then I googled it and apparently its also a song. So which one/which combination are you referencing?

Also your blind date story was a fascinating read, it made me laugh. Very impressed by your chutzpah

Oh nvm, saw that you answered the above in another ask, feel free to ignore

No, I totally get it. Mormonism robbed and scrambled the iconography of a lot of religions, but the two it yoinked the most from are the Masons and the Jews. Like, it is my culture now, but I will acknowledge that my culture is what would happen if you asked a 14 year old conman from NY to skin your culture and wear it. I can't imagine how weird it must be to hear us talk.

Glad to have you approval on the blind date story though. That was a nightmare.

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@conkreetmonkey says

Personally I think you should do the egg thing again just for the hell of it. I honestly would because you made it sound fun, but eggs be expensive around these parts

My budget is a liiiiittle bit tight for the next month because my wife is doing occupational therapy, but there's a grocery store nearby that sells quail eggs, and to celebrate her finishing that, I am going to be a dozen and shotgun those bad boys. Hell yeah.

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Anonymous says

bulking must be so easy if you can effortlessly consume 15 raw eggs

No, for two reasons.

The first is that it was not effortless. It was effortful. I had to sweat to get them down. I had to fight them into me. I have a very vivid memory of finishing the eggs, and then leaning over to tie my shoe, and feel the eggs start to actually tip out of me, not even as like, puking, but like emptying water out of a boot. I actually had to sit for a half hour after that for the eggs to actually stay.

The second reason is that eating is easy for me, but gaining muscle mass is not. If I work out like crazy and lift weights, I get very wirey, but I never actually get big. I tried bulking one time, and my muscles stayed the same size while the 20 pounds I gained just went right to my belly and I looked like a grape on a toothpick. Very wild experience. Made my peace with being a skinny nerd.

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Anonymous says

just letting you know that you can sterilise raw eggs by keeping them at 130°F for a few hours, you can do this with a sous vide and eat them with no salmonella concerns

I love tumblr so much but all the people that read a story about some idiot eating 15 raw eggs on an impulse and then went ah, yes, this man clearly owns a sous vide machine and is willing to use it are crazier than I am. Get some realistic expecations of the world. Know your audience. You are setting your bar too high, and will find yourself endlessly disappointed. Stop it. This is why left leaning people are so fucking sad. They read the egg story and think they can solve my life with a sous vide, instead of reading the egg story and realizing that there is nothing in this world that could possibly save my from myself. I am not a stupid person. I am a highly motivated clever person who enjoys doing stupid things. There's no stopping that.

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@brambledboneyards says

Hey OP I just wanted to let you know I was informed when I was younger that farm fresh eggs will not give you salmonella. I would recommend fact checking this, but if it does remain true I hope you can date the cravings once more

This is actually good advice. I know several people who own chickens down here. Bless you.

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@queerdo-mcjewface

Some stores sell pasteurized eggs for recipes that require raw or undercooked eggs

Alas, they only sell egg whites down here, which are flavorless. I want the whole egg experience. The slime, the yolk, the cracking open - I appreciate the advice, but no, it's just not visceral enough.

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@decentmonster says

you'd probably love quail shooters tbh, you can get them at most sushi restaurants and theyre served raw and are really good (also safe to eat)

Also farm-fresh eggs are less likely to have salmonella!!

Two months time, I will eat a dozen raw quail eggs.

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Anonymous says

I want you to know the egg story is literally one of the funniest things I've ever read in my life. I laughed so hard I woke up my husband

I think that was the first little life-short-story thing I posted. Maybe? I'm glad you had fun reading it.

[pikespendragon67]

Pikes Summer Check-Up 2024 Edition

Started to go “hm I still have to unlearn the don’t speak unless spoken to mindset that I have” but remembered I could do a checkup post instead!

Current life updates:

Right now I’m saving up for conventions happening this August, though plushie collecting & Steam summer sales miiiight have interfered. Whoops. (…and I wonder if I should get back to my FE Cipher card collection). My next big-ish trip is visiting my middle school best friend with another high school friend. I’m also hoping for my next big trip this year to be Boston in late September to meet with a friend. After that, it should be a trip with my middle school best friend to a farm, something Halloween related with IRL friends depending on what they want to do, no clue for November, and seeing relatives for New Year’s.

Gonna see if I can reorganize my closet since everything in my room got reassembled when we got new flooring. Feels cluttered as a result. Hopefully my back won’t kill me.

Might have jury duty next week too OTL

What I’m watching:

Current schedule for watching anime is as follows:

Mondays - Digimon rewatch along with Spice & Wolf 2024. I really like Lawrence and Holo’s banter. For Digimon I just got to where Mimi obtains her Crest. Man adult me really just became Joe, huh.

Tuesdays are filler at the moment since I need to wait for Pokemon Horizons to update on Nettingtonflix (I watch the dub) and I finished Kakuriyo. Part 2 of Kakuriyo was…eh, I guess? I noticed stiff animation a lot and I didn’t really get the sense of drama/urgency that I was expecting. Might throw in some more Digimon episodes until Horizons updates. (I’m liking it so far, though it’s not something I’d shout to the heavens about)

Wednesdays - Baccano finally. I might need to rewatch some parts because they retell events from different perspectives, but I see repeats and get confused if I already watched the episode or not because of that.

Thursdays - Moribito. I’ve heard this show was good, though I think I need to rewatch this one as well since I miss important info when something dramatic’s not happening. The curse of having a show as background noise during your lunch break at work.

Fridays - Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure rewatch. Friends were talking about watching it so it got me interested in rewatching once more. I’m still on Phantom Blood but I’m excited for the rewatch until I hit Stardust Crusaders. Unfortunately it’s not my favorite part and it’s the longest.

Saturdays - My Hero Academia and Sakuna: Of Rice and Ruin. I’m gonna see if I end up liking Sakuna more as an anime or as a game. As for Hero Academia, I’m really liking how this current season’s hyping up the finale. And with the manga ending next month, I kind of hope Vigilantes can be animated

Sundays - Tower of God season 2 and My Deer Friend Nokotan. Nokotan kind of reminds me of Lucky Star, but I’m hoping the shitposts aren’t just making fun Koshitan. Tower of God season 2 looks pretty promising. Though I lament that God of High School had to rush everything into 1 season.

I’m getting hyped for TYBW part 3 subconsciously and also hope the light novels get covered.

In terms of stuff on Youtube, it’s mostly let’s plays for games that I want to see if I want to play them myself. I appreciate that SMT 5 Vengeance fleshed out certain characters more, but damn. I also finished watching the ProZD Plays Ace Attorney 2. Franziska is wonderful, I wish she was in a different game. I liked case 2 the most in spite of Hotti’s mere existence.

What I’m Playing:

Stopped TTYD in the middle of chapter 6 since I didn’t want to deal with the turning platform section. So now it’s back to 428 Shibuya Scramble. I’m in the 3 PM section of the game now and things are getting spicy. So far my rankings of the routes are Tama > Minorikawa > Osawa/Achi > Kano.

I also have quite a few fighting games in my Steam library now! I still only button mash, but I’ve been playing with some folks in the Granblue community and my friend Merlin. My “don’t speak unless spoken to” mindset unfortunately kicks in when it comes to inviting people to play games, though. Like granted people are busy and I don’t want to bother them but aaaaaaa (so if you wanna play with me on Steam I’m free most weekends. Though my wrist may fatigue itself too. F)

I’m also contemplating if I want to have various small fics in a collection or add alternate endings in my main Bleach fic

AND NOW, I end asking how ny’all are you doing. Any cool things on your end?

[neinofthem]

I posted 290 times in 2022

That's 263 more posts than 2021!

208 posts created (72%)

82 posts reblogged (28%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@neinofthem

@viciousmollymaukery

@quinn-of-aebradore

@essektheylyss

@andgently

I tagged 166 of my posts in 2022

Only 43% of my posts had no tags

#essek thelyss - 99 posts

#critical role - 98 posts

#the mighty nein - 89 posts

#cr - 88 posts

#mighty nein - 83 posts

#tm9 - 81 posts

#cr2 - 74 posts

#shadowgast - 68 posts

#cr shitpost - 53 posts

#critical role essek - 50 posts

Longest Tag: 137 characters

#imagine waking up one day and remembering that the disgraced former shadowhand is a. 4’10 on a good day and b. definitely without a doubt

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

literally the best thing about essek is that it’s so hard to have a bad take about him because he is so many things. yes he is a virgin librarian yes he is a suave sexy politician yes he is a brilliant wizard prodigy yes he has the warcaster feat no he has never seen conflict. it’s literally yes he’s world weary and has lived for over a hundred years yes he’s said the word ‘fuck’ once and once only. yes he carries around a frilly pink parasol yes he was the head of arcane intelligence for the fucking queen of the kryn dynasty and no one has asked his favorite food before. what is WITH this guy I LOVE him.

2,493 notes - Posted February 28, 2022

#4

as much as essek is a genius wizard and schemer and intimidating and aloof he is also Just Some Guy. he stole the most important items in his country’s culture not because of a desire to start war but because he’s a huge nerd. he’s being chased by assassins and the people who exposed his crimes led the worst man of all existence to his doorstep and he wants to get drunk off of boozy hot chocolate. he tried to fistfight a giant with his twink wizard noodle arms. he gardens. he can crush a man with one hand. he has little teefies. his dad got so angry at him he died. he’s dating the worlds most traumatized man. he’s my best friend. he’s gay. easily the most character of all time.

2,535 notes - Posted February 21, 2022

#3

essek: caleb did you fight a demigod. caleb answer me did you fight the fucking ocean.

caleb, tenderly cradling his face: you’re so hot.

2,577 notes - Posted December 2, 2022

#2

bells hells merrily traipsing their way into aeor sometime in the near future: who are you guys lmao. anyways we think we’re swinging by that little bitch moon next to take care of the Moon Haunting that has been Plaguing us with Visions.

caleb and essek on their fifth aeorian honeymoon: what are the words that you are saying. why does that stalactite have a beacon in his head. what do you mean you ran into ludinus da’leth. why do you have a fucking robot. what was that about the fucking moon.

2,899 notes - Posted September 2, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

imagine you are the director of the magic cia and you betrayed your home country because they denied your grad thesis and you thought everything was chill but then a group of people in bdsm gear burst into the room holding the god that you stole and you now have to babysit them and watch while they ruin the house your family gave them and you are also in a honeypot4honeypot situationship with their resident ginger and you teach him forbidden magics because he has nice eyes and you keep having to ferry them to fight dragons or some shit and they keep fucking inviting you to dinner so you go to dinner and they trap you, the traitor they’re looking for, in a truth spell and instead of asking any damning question they want to know which of them you find the hottest and what your moms name is and then they disappear for like two months and then you’re in disguise at the negotiation which undermines your past decades work and they fucking show up and they find out about your crimes so they paralyze you and drag you to their ship and instead of killing you the ginger kisses you on the forehead and they tell you that you’re family now and then they disappear for a long fucking time so you leave and go chill in the north and then they show up chased by a purple man with horns and a dead member of the fucking cerberus assembly and then they fucking dip and when you come back they take you to a flesh city to fight the purple man but they get really sad when they murder him so they revive him? and also you find evidence that the god that you stole is not a god and is some kind of hyper advanced magic computer maybe and then you just sort of fucking go home? and chill in a garden? every day essek thelyss wakes up.

4,733 notes - Posted March 24, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[aowikieee]

the main reason of why i made this side-blog is because i lost my biggest safe space where i could be absolutely free with my thoughts.

you see, there was a small social network named FeelYou. it's like a mood tracker, but also a social media because many other users can see your posts in here. it was very comfortable for me in here, and i even found some friends in here, but unfortunately it's been on a damn maintenance since September 24th. it's been, like, more than a month already.

i understand if the devs are making a huge update or yadda yadda, but DAMN, so many things happened to me since then and i REALLY wanted to vent openly about it. sure, i have a channel on telegram where i post shitposts, vents and my art, but the main difference is that the subs are all my friends. i want to vent about them as well sometimes, plus sometimes my thoughts are not... completely normal. but I'm obsessed with the idea of posting all my thoughts that come in my head!!!!!!

i just don't want to worry my friends or ruin the façade i made for myself. i need to remain cool and strong, I don't want to be seen as weak by my friends. and also i don't want to hear the teasing from my friends, even if it's not made with evil intentions.

sooooo be ready for many posts, and many of them not being normal or healthy :D

[chargetheintruder]

I've been holding back for a bit.

This has been mainly to save my strength for things that matter, because my health's no good, and this has been a busy month (lots and lots of packages to snag). And now a few items have come to my attention as being urgent. Bear with me, I'll try to keep to the point.

Edit: I cut and pasted the aggro/political stuff so that this post isn't such a rude shitpost. Not that I think most of Tumblr is that conservative, it's just that the tonal whiplash was a bit much even by my own pathetic standards, my apologies.

Oh, and this happens. No, not my being aggressive when I'm aggressive, but this Media thing. Many of these bought, paid-for and kept hacks either can't (can not, as in are unable to) or won't (will not, as in refuse to) distinguish fantasy from reality. Do Dark Mirror stories make for some fascinating fiction for me? Sure. Does that mean I want to live there? Absolutely not.

But let's get back to this . . .

--In other news? Not that anyone's going to see this, but for real, Mr. James Gunn? You there, the guy doing a Superman film currently? I'm not sure what to make of your behavior over there on that thing Elon Musk made out of Twitter, okay? Because I thought for sure you were a nerd who knew his stuff and knew the difference between a Bizarro (Clone of Superman) and a Dark Mirror Universe Superman. Among other things. So I'll just keep it simple.

Based on the earliest evidence from your casting of guest heroes, I'm guessing that when it comes to Formerly Twitter, you're that guy, flipping the coin and saying, "Heads I tell the Truth . . . aw shucks, gotta lie some more," because it superficially looks like you're making a Superman (and a few bros of his) versus The Crime Syndicate movie (or two). And all I have to say to that is: Lean into it. LEAN INTO IT. If you're not doing that it'll be the slickest deception ever.

And if you ARE doing that, and you have to go Kill Bill on it and make it two tightly released volumes, please do that. Really, your whole superhero thing so far (based on your Guardians work and your work on The Suicide Squad) suggests that big honking clusterfucks like that are your jam. :) Just say something like "The Justice League's off-world currently, something's gone bad to screw Clark out of most of his powers, and he's having to scramble to get what help he can."

Full Disclosure: I am biased here. I admit I might be a fan of the Syndicate here. The concept of 1980s Yuppie Scum (and worse) getting together as a Gangsta League, that just hits the twisted buttons in all sorts of places. If I could draw worth a damn and still had my health I might do a bootleg comic or something called Challenge of the Super-Fiends, featuring the Syndicate, just so I could see my bad guys doing bad things more than once a decade. But hey.

Edit: And now for the political stuff for those who care about it, and only those. Sorry to burden the rest of you.

--This so-called "debate". This Media-orchestrated alt-reich mugging is more like it. No, who the fuck wants a proper debate with "no notes, no props" as their rules? No professional public speaker and/or politician since 1900 has debated this way, entirely from memory, for good reason. IT'S HARD, even when you're young and in your right mind. Way to throw Trump and Traitor Party YET ANOTHER fucking softball, you bought and paid-for psychos. No really, we get it, competence bores you, but you really WANT society to be ransacked and ruined by every petty fascist ever? Really? Fuck this noise, vote BLUE, fuck these experts, fuck all traitors, like the Trumps.

--And YES, I do have a PLAN for this godawful election in these so-called United States. It's still too early to discuss it in detail but I am going to need help with it--my health is too bad to do it all myself, even if I had the money to do so. No, it doesn't involve firearms (directly). We won't have to do much more than make well-timed phone calls, by the hundred, from burner phones.

And that's it for now, I might add more to this if it comes back to me tonight. Thanks for your patience.

[lucifersgoodboyinheaven]

Heh, the fact that I will like my moots posts cause <3 love you don't know what I did right for you to follow me backkkk but love you so so much... but that's all I'll do (like your posts) cause I'm absolutely terrified of you guys perceiving me as more than just my silly little shitposts...may send an anon question thingy whatever their called but you'll never know it's me

So, I say that to say this, If you'd like to percieve me as more that my posts, I will allow it, I'll encourage it, I just can't make the first move cause once I do I'll be a little ball of anxiety and overthinking until you respond, and I do mean respond, not just simply like it...because then I'd go into more of a spiral of anxiety and overthinking like "Omg they liked it! Yes I'm valuable! wait...they only liked it...did I say something wrong? Was it funny but not good enough, what did I do? Fuck now they aren't gonna wanna be my moot anymore...Damn did I just really ruin another friendship before it even started?"

SO yeah...balls always in your court moots, my court is out of bounds and very dark, you wouldn't be able to find that ball over here (hehe get it? Cause I'm trans *wink wink nudge nudge*)

[lunarfortune]

okay im just gonna type some shit for the moment or whatever but elise mf origin post because it's super funny to me

long rambly post with a bunch of card game images

anyway way back in like 2020 and early 2021 Legends of Runeterra had its Lab of Legends mode. Similar to Path of Champions but like, way more basic since it was the earlier version. You pick a champ and fight through a series of 9? stages or so, theyre all the same each time, with the bosses being Thresh, Sejuani (FUCK Scargrounds stage) and Viktor (and FUCK Guard Bots stage too). Each first clear with a champ would grant you a unique player icon for them, but I wasn't super concerned with collecting them all, I really just wanted Miss Fortune. The problem was that her starting deck is kind of Not Great and it's especially easy to get reamed by bad rng and her ability is straight up a hindrance against Scargrounds. I was having so much trouble with MF runs it was unreal. My friend cleared it relatively quickly, but I could not for the life of me get a good run going. I struggled with it on and off for WEEKS. I was just resigned to never clearing it.

So one fateful day in February of 2021 I am going through yet another MF lab run and get offered a choice between Zoe, Elise and Jinx as my deck's support champs. Fuck it, I'm thinking, just take Elise for laughs, who gives a shit anymore.

While I'm playing I'm shitposting on discord with a friend and making jokes about the whole thing, and we all know what happens when you make jokes. Didn't win that run but within a day it did get the gears in ye olde brain turning.

(i've now had this sitting in drafts for a month btw LOL i forgor)

The next month I'm starting up yet another run, and at this point I'm so demoralized by my bad luck with this I'm just like, yeah okay whatever Elise again, I'm just gonna lose at Scargrounds again like always

So I'm just going through the motions with this run and being more excited about the loot I'm getting of the Empires of the Ascended event. Somehow got quite lucky through Scars and Sejuani because the ai wasn't pulling followers to play.

Like I really cannot stress how lackluster the rng through this run was, I was genuinely surprised I got through Sejuani lmao

I guess purely to spite me, this run makes it past Foundry and Guard Bots and gets to Viktor. It's.... dicey. Elise's spiders give me more fodder to keep the nexus safe but between Elise's support cards and Sarah's starting deck, I don't really have any big hitters if Viktor starts to beef up, and I was never able to pick up anything from round rewards.

The Ruination I picked up comes in an early draw and comes in handy, clearing the board. I'm in the damn trenches clutching my spiders and fighting for my life. Another Viktor comes out, I draw a second Ruination and pop it. Viktor plays a Nyandroid.

He doesn't seem to have anything else to play. With both Sarah and Elise leading the charge, I attack.

Finally, finally, after so many attempts, I was FREE. Love fucking wins. Sarah's Love Tap took out the 5/1 bot that would have killed Elise during the Guard Bots stage. These champs speedran enemies to lovers through a month of me suffering through to get my first clear. I was utterly bewildered.

So anyway thats the story of how Elise/Miss Fortune was kind of a joke and then not a joke and I have given very serious consideration as to how they could encounter one another and how that would go.

Elise Does make trips to Bilgewater btw, thanks Ruined King!

[captainfightingflower]

Why Word Spud is my favorite game out of all the Party Packs.

No, you read that right: this isn’t a shitpost. Word Spud is my favorite game out of all the Party Packs.

Now i’m not saying the rest of the games are shit in comparison, a good bit of them are really darn fun and only some of them really need tweaking, (also not saying all of them are good ether, Lie Swatter is pretty mid and i hate most of the games from Pack 8 & 9) i’m here because i want to share to you my love for this incredibly over hated game and why exactly i find it so appealing.

Reason 1#. The soundtrack is one of the best out there!

Most of us know that a lot of the stuff made by Andy Poland for these games is really really good, but my GOD is Word Spud’s soundtrack just banger after banger after BANGER! All of it is so darn soothing. I do have a good bit of the songs from these games in my MP3 folder, however i only really have just a couple of the songs, but Word Spud is the only one of these games where i have every single song in my MP3 folder. Take a listen to it if you have the time, it’s a real treat!

Reason 2#. The sound design in general is incredibly soothing!

The sound of someone typing, them entering a word, the clicks and clacks, it’s almost ASMR! The sound design really stands out & compliments the music, which isn’t all that new to the Party Packs, but man is it phenomenal! I almost feel like i’m transported to another world with how joyous it all is.

Reason 3#. The graphic designs is so sleek!

Now people tend to bring up how Word Spud lacks character as one of it’s biggest flaws, but i think the opposite. I think it’s apparent “lack of character” is one of it’s strengths! Every game in these packs try so hard to stand out, giving you hosts with lore and so much depth it rivals most main characters, as well as giving each one it’s own quirky aesthetic so it can stick in your head for as long as it can. But Word Spud’s lack of apparent host or quirky visuals make it stand out just as much as the rest of them. It’s got a potato for a mascot, sure, but that’s really the end of the quirky visuals. It unique in the fact that no other game is so simple, so calming, so sleek and modern looking. And because it’s the only one of it’s kind in all of the Party Packs, it has it’s own incredibly unique identity unmatched by any game before or after it. While every game other game is like a poster, Word Spud is like a tree: it isn’t trying to grab your attention, but it treats the ones who do notice it with a beauty that no billboard can imitate.

Reason 4#. It doesn’t hold your hand as much as the other games do.

Now what do i mean by this? Well, the other creativity-type games are like cake mix: you can add what you want to it and it won’t ruin the cake (unless you REALLY put something disgusting in there), however, you can’t really improve the base cake mix all that much since most of the cake has been already done for you; if you use chocolate cake mix, you’re locked out of most other cake flavours. While Word Spud is like flour, it’s harder to make a good cake out of it, but if you really know what you’re doing: you can make an incredible delicacy! While baking with cake mix tends to be a one person job, baking with flour is better enjoyed when working with a team. Both have their positives and negatives. People don’t really tend to like Word Spud because of this, but that’s because they treat Word Spud as cake mix when it’s truly flour. You put strawberries in it: it’s gonna taste like strawberries. You put cucumbers in it: it’s gonna taste like cucumbers. You put shit in it: it’s gonna taste like shit. Plus: it being this freeform prevents “winning by writing nothing but the word cum” that people have been complaining about so many other creativity-type games Jackbox produces. You gotta learn how to truly get your enjoyment with the spud, but once you do: GOD DAMN is it fun!

Reason 5#. It’s zen atmosphere.

Like i mentioned previously: Word Spud has got a character no other game in the series has: it’s calming. I find myself best enjoying playing Word Spud when i’m stressed. Because when i try to play any other Jackbox party game when i’m stressed, all see is: BAM POOF FIND IT FIND IT DO THIS NO DON’T DO THAT LORE LORE LORE COLORS FLASH SLASH FARRRRT KA-BOOM YA LOSER! and i don’t really want to deal with that when i’m stressed. But Word Spud? It’s so serene! After a few game i may even forget why i was so stressed to begin with, the worries just melt away like butter with sour cream. Best of all: my mind doesn’t get preoccupied with the hosts, causing me to truly relax instead of stressing myself out on something new. Word Spud is just something i can pick up at anytime while with other games i need to be in a specific mood to consider playing (especially Trivia Murder Party, i CANNOT play that game unless i’m in the EXACT PERFECT mood for it). And while the game doesn’t support single player: i just open up an incognito tab and play a round with myself, or maybe even with an AI if i really feel like playing with someone.

Now you know why i like Word Spud. And while it may never truly get a sequel: the game by itself is perfect to me as is!

But for the love of God Jackbox: please stop with the hate, it’s not funny: it’s just cruel! The horse already died a decade ago, stop punching it’s decaying corpse.

[crystalkleure]

Coatless Chouzetsu!Shu is such a fucking lie because LOOK at him. You see him from the waist-up and you think maybe, for a change, maybe just ONCE in this boy’s life he has actually figured out how to dress himself. He looks GOOD. These clothes look CUTE. Pink and white with gold trim on the vest and a soft warm-ish black tie. The ever-present single glove for a splash of bright red to match his pretty pretty pigmentation-devoid eyes. This is a GREAT colour palette for him. This is FANTASTIC.

And then you remember his pants are navy blue.