#rough the past few weeks

[emotigonecreative]

Kalor session 46

[trauma-bot]

i just wanted to draw her...

[buglaur]

i've been playing the game in my own time but i gotta share this lil angel cus she's the cutest toddler my sims have ever had

[literally-forever]

moodboard for crystal 🔮

[persy-r-bozo]

Hi silly gang

[inhuman-obey-me]

Congrats on 100k likes!! Is there any more room or space left? If so, Belphegor and 7 pls!

Thank you!! And you're the lucky last one we're doing. <3

Belphegor + 7 | "Better Days" - Currents

cw: depression talk

It's said that when humans have a sleep paralysis demon haunting them, they often feel an unyielding weight upon their bodies, rendering them unable to move. It's a tried and true trick that Belphegor knows quite well.

"Is this what it feels like?" he muses, sprawled out on his bed as he stares at the ceiling, eyes tracing a pattern of painted stars. He's been doing this for the past ten hours, unable to get himself up to do much of anything else. The weight pressing down on him was suffocating, so why did he also find it so oddly comforting? Had he just gotten used to the heaviness? Used to the hole that had dug itself deep into his chest?

"Belphie, you haven't eaten anything all day." Beelzebub's voice draws him out of his thoughts. Lazily turning his head to meet his twin's gaze, he lets out a long sigh.

"Not hungry."

Beelzebub frowns, crumbs littering his face as he chews on whatever he just stuffed into his mouth. It's clear he wants to say something, but he instead plops down on the floor beside Belphegor's bed, leaning back and pulling out another snack to munch on. The seventh-born almost wants to tell him to leave, but he knows it'll get him nowhere — Beelzebub always knew when something was wrong.

"…Do you ever miss it?"

"Mish wha?" His brother responds, his mouth full.

"The Celestial Realm." Belphegor's fingers curl into fists, his brows furrowed as he turns to look at the wall. "Being an angel."

He can hear Beel pause his chewing before resuming at a quicker pace. After a few moments, Belphegor feels the bed tilt and move, Beelzebub now having lifted himself to sit on its edge.

"I mean, yeah. Sometimes." Beelzebub shifts. "It was a big part of our lives, so it's only natural, right? But I'm happy to be a demon now too, and to be here with our family, which is what's really important."

"Except for Lilith."

"…Yeah. Except for Lilith." His twin deflates. "…What's on your mind, Belphie?"

"Sometimes it feels like I'm the only one who just gets stuck." The words are bitter on his tongue, frustration rising in his voice. "I'm glad we finally found out the truth about what happened to her, but it doesn't erase the fact that she's gone. Everyone else just…moved on! And I'm just here."

That suffocating yet comforting weight, keeping him in place.

"…Are you here? It sounds more like you're there." With a forceful tap on Belphegor's shoulder, Beelzebub makes him turn towards him. "I…get it. You know I do. I still feel guilty — and yes, I know," he stops Belphie from interrupting, "…it's not my fault, it couldn't be helped. But I still feel that way. So sometimes I feel like I'm more there, you know." He scratches the back of his neck, trying to find the right words. "Mammon and Asmo talk a lot about 'living in the moment', and I think I get it. We can't change the past, but we can hold onto what we have right now, like each other."

"…Really? You got your great advice from those two?" Belphegor groans, but it's hard to hide the hint of a smile on his lips. "I think they're probably talking more about partying and doing something stupid."

"Probably, but it doesn't change what I said." Beelzebub stands up, holding out a hand to his brother with a determined look. "So, how about we try living in the moment right now? Maybe we can even go do something stupid."

A low chuckle, and it's like the weight lessens. A knowing sigh, and it lessens again. Belphegor reaches out to take the other's hand, letting himself get dragged off the bed.

"Okay. But don't blame me if Lucifer gets mad."

[the-alan-price-combo]

An Animals diorama I made, based on the Pop Gear music video of "House of the Rising Sun"!!

🌅🐾✨️

(Detailed pictures under the cut!)

[kayleerowena]

adhd meds are costing me $150 this month because of the vyvanse shortage so: if you like my work and have spare change, i'm sliding this link to my tip jar in your direction very subtly

[cliff-and-the-kid]

(I have every intention of doing inbox trick or treating this week but uh. Also have a vet appointment on the day of Halloween, and I'm going into it expecting bad news, so we'll see how online I actually am afterwards)

[selfinflictedgunshotwound]

men are so disappointing in so many ways i know i shouldn't expect most of them to be dignified humans but it's crazy. i need to get over this guy he's making my sense of self crumble even faster than it usually does. like he's just so unlike my usual type and i'm pretty convinced he's stupid and slutty and not discerning whatsoever. not to mention boring like i know even if i did have a chance with him he wouldn't Get Me at all so it's a bigger waste of time that usual and i'm actually pretty tired of men in general and definitely tired of parasocial relationships because they drive me insane for months typically. thankfully it's only been like 2 weeks if that at this point. idk. sigh. i know literally virtually nothing abt him as a person and ofc liking any public figure who you know nothing about is only setting yourself for heartbreak and disappointment to begin with bc you already know nothing is gonna come from it but. in a way it's almost addictive to become obsessed with someone and not be looked at with the same level of scrutiny. i don't think anyone in real life would ever try to get to know me as much as i try to get to know people who i'll never even meet. lmao! but that's the thing... idk... i have a lot of love in my heart and it consumes me and i reject my pride usually when i'm into someone. i want to know more... like VORACIOUSLY consuming anything with information about them involved simply because i think knowing someone is a very deep form of love but of course you can never truly know anyone. not completely. and that scares me i think which is why it's always probably been easier for me to never really TRY to be with anyone or have anything real. idk. this turned into me psychoanalyzing myself real quick but SOMEONE needs to bc i need to understand what the fuck is wrong w me.

[resident-rats]

My heart wants to write pornnnnnnm. Let me write pornnnnn. There’s already like 4k words of sexual tension. Let me finish itttttttt

[jossun-kyyneleet]

WTF I drew Krisko 🤯

[definitelynotshouting]

Don’t worry about not posting or anything! Take care of yourself man!! I hope you feel better soon 💜

[scribesofcalamity]

A quick small piece of vent art.

Avoid the tags,I am putting all the Blegh stuff there. Things are rough right now and have been for multiple weeks….but I am holding on. I’m going to try and do sketches for the rest of the people I want to hit for art fight. I’m going to catch up on my work and keep doing well. I’m going to have a good weekend with my partner. I’m going to be ok. It is going to be ok.

[skooturmkdootlur]

You aren't who I thought you were.

[scummy-writes]

I really dislike that I keep getting these anons that are dressed as legit concern over a topic, when its really just them trying to needle in some insults.

The last anon was dressing up concern for a lack of support for fanfiction, which is not a nuanced topic, but throws in insults towards my choice of trying to muse about ideas I dont have the steam to write due to a lot of IRL issues and needles in 'where is the support for actual fanfics?'

If you were supporting writers, you wouldn't needle in bullshit like that. Using the word 'actually' further shows that you place a huge line between semi fanfic posts/drabbles and whatever you consider an 'actual' fanfic to be.

The weird anons needling in about how I want to stop being treated weirdly, or how 'big' blogs need to do xyz for fandom, or how I don't talk to other 'big' blogs - using the same language as the previous anon - to tell me they don't care for my blog and want to further needle in some insults with that.

The weird anon that combed through at least a months worth of posts on my personal blog, where I will vent sometimes since it barely has followers and I dont get interaction really on there, to ask very leading questions on what makes a fanfic 'good' verses being 'perceived as good'...

All of it points to a writer or a small group of writers, very upset that their fanfiction isn't getting 'a lot of notes' (who knows wtf they consider 'a lot' and 'too little', its likely skewed) and using my askbox to give me a headache, to spread harmful thoughts, and to needle in a few insults because I guess they just don't fuckin like me and view me as an easy target.

Some of these asks I haven't posted publicly. I have definitely blocked one, maybe more, but they're coming through anyway with the same baseline. I'm going to encourage you guys to look at asks like these with a more critical eye. Don't be me, but learn from my blundering. Thanks.