#rn its just cause i have thoughts and opinions

[sage-is-in-fact-very-tired]

you all will make me write fic 69 spitefully, I see. (/lh)

[system-of-a-feather]

I was honestly thinking about it and I think my opinion on a lot of things boils down to "it is entirely fair to cut anyone out of your life who doesn't respect the version and expression of you that makes you the happiest" and I think that probably extends to almost all "expressions" only with the caveat that I don't see it as a moral mandate to respect every expression someone offers and I don't think its inherently wrong to not accept someones expression if it also requires you to reject an aspect of yourself in your happiest version.

Do I think either of these are always the most healthy rules to live by? No. But do I think its fair rules and expectations? Yeah.

You can't force someone to change essential parts of who they are (may the rejection be bigotted or based) in favor of your identity / expression but you also can't tell someone to not express / identify the way that makes them happy and expect them to still like you

In the end, not everyone is fit to get along with everyone and thats okay and fine so long as that is respected.

Like if it makes TERFs and shit happy to ID as TERFs and be TERFs, its within my realm of control to make them stop, nor can I blame them if they hate me - but they also can't be mad if I also hate them and block them cause its not their right to force me to accept them in my life

I absolutely do not have to agree or respect anyone, but I can't be surprised when someone whose expression I don't like and hate returns it back to me.

[butchlifeguard]

got around to reading that gawker article on adhd and i have very mixed opinions

[hyukalyptus]

saw your reblog about kissing along the happy trail and let out a great sigh bc i could never do that to them 😔

but yeah i believe in kai happy trail and perhaps also beomgyu???

idk if you’ve done this before but what are your hairy TXT hc’s? like where do u think their body hair is most…evident? (does that make sense omg i hope it does!!)

- 🐳

okay girlie let's get into it,, i havent given it like, dedicated thought and i dont have strong opinions developed, other than i love the thought of hairy!txt lmao so i will try to be consistent with my thoughts ehehehe.

cw. lots of hair talk ahead. mentions of sex in kai's, balls, bjs.

so obviously theyve all got pelvic pubes right ? and i know we dont see a lot of their hair but this is if they don't shave/laser it off lmfao. also none of this is real im just being weird as hell about hair.

yeonjun- i think his armpit hair is like a long line ig? instead of it being like a clump in the middle, its like in a line lmao, idk how to explain it BUT i bring treats (sfw link to yj armpit hair crumbs!! its an old pic tho) and i know he shaved his face in that vlog but i feel like he was just doin that to look hot lmao, i dont think he has super intense facial hair tbh. other than that, i think he's typically got the sexiest happy trail ever!! and what i mean by that, is that i dont think his tummy is super hairy, so his happy trail is a pretty distinct line. and its dark and is a literally happy trail lmfao.

soobin- he's hairy!!! and i will not be silenced any longer. thats why he looks so baby is bc that man is meant to have hair. not a ton though. bushy armpit hair, even a little hairy chested i think. like a pretty wide line down the middle of his chest and it spreads over his pecks a little. hairy legs!! >< ugh imagine laying on his slightly hairy chest and rubbin his 5 oclock shadow, just snugglin and cozy wozy <3

beomgyu- seems to be the most facially hairy lol. i could see him having a pretty substantial beard. and a hairy tummy for sure. i know thats not a look for beomie but those are my thoughts lol

taehyun- oooohhh i think his arms and legs are pretty hairy. so rn i dont think he's as muscular as he'd like to be bc if youre super muscley and a dancer, it could cause injuries easier bc of flexibility SO anyway, all that to say, i think when he's retired he's gonna get all muscley and his arms and legs are gonna be all hairy and delicious :p

kai- ok y'all thought i yapped about yj and soob's hair too much well.....i could talk about hairy kai for hours and hours. i think he's the hairiest by far !! omfg. hairy chest and hairy tummy. FUCK im giggling too much. thinking about post-sex kai, sweaty and out of breath, laying on his hairy chest while y'all catch ur breath. thinking about his hairy arms wrapping around ur waist to hug you. i know this is so random, but thinking about rubbing sunscreen into his skin for him at the beach. eheheh. getting on ur knees for him, kissing down his tummy on ur way down AH, playin with his bush before playing with his balls before suckin his dick LOL. but frfr never not thinking about laying on kai's hairy chest post-sex lmfao.

[starry-bi-sky]

I am absolutely loving your Danyal Al Ghul au. While I have a soft spot for the whole plotline of Danny becoming his canon personality almost right after breaking away from the LOA all because of Jazz, I'm just as much for your take in which he goes through the same character development as Damian.

Now I'm curious. You already tackled his relationship with Dani, will you eventually take a stab at when he, Sam, and Tucker meet Gregor? Given that it's one of my hated episodes as I couldn't stand Sam's infuriatingly hypocritical attitude to Danny's suspicions of him, I'd kill to see your spin on it.

Aw, thank you! Danyal Al Ghul aus are what got me into DPDC first, so I have a major soft spot for them. That being said, uh, its exactly that soft spot that causes me to have Many Opinions about the trope you just mentioned. Like the trope is all fine and dandy, i don't blindly hate it, my main issue with it is that most aus i've seen treat his backstory as an ex-assassin more like a pretty cosmetic accessory rather than something that actually should have had an impact on him. Especially if he remembers being in the league.

Like i cannot stress enough the fact that being in an ecofascist assassin cult (regardless of his standing in it) should've left him, in some way or another, screwed up morally and psychologically because that's just how development works. Nature vs. Nurture is like a game of tug-o-war that never ends, where they are constantly fighting against each other and one side usually has the upper hand or greater influence. Children model the behaviors of the adults around them (ex: bobo the clown doll experiment), and what impacts them in childhood can stick with them permanently.

Like how my psychology professor put it: a baby's brain is like wet cement; if you slap your hand on it, it leaves an imprint, and the cement dries that way. The same rings true for small children.

I could go on, but I frankly have so many thoughts on that alone that I would end up completely derailing from the second half of your ask, and I don't want to be more critical than I already have. Especially since you just mentioned you have a soft spot for the trope.

[Okay, hold onto your hats because this is long. Naturally lmao.]

Gregor! Man, I'll admit I last watched the show back in middle school on a dodgy illegal website (it had surprisingly good audio and visual graphics, and full episodes. But really annoying porn ads.) but I only made it to like season 1 before my hyperfixation faded and I lost interest. So I never actually saw the Gregor episode.

But... it is relatively easy to find free websites that stream Danny Phantom :), so finding the episode took me like. Thirty seconds. Plus the Tv.Tropes recap page because my damn earbuds just died and im out in public as of rn.

I'm not sure if I'll write something for the gregor episode like I did with Dani, since Dani's a bit of a special case in that she's a clone and tends to be a reoccurring presence in DPDC, and I thought the new dynamic with Danyal would be interesting.

Plus, I'm not a big amethyst ocean shipper for the pure reason of I'm just not all that interested in it; its kinda bland to me. I'll admit I've entertained the thought in this au due to the whole balcony scene i wrote, but I would've entertained the thought anyways if it was Tucker in that position instead. Big multishipper, me.

But, if I had to make it official? Danyal is not interested romantically in Sam when the Gregor episode happens, regardless of his relationship with Valerie. Who, speaking of I'm trying to think about how that would go, and I'm torn between including him almost-dating Valerie or not.

Because on one hand it helps point out Sam's hypocrisy (and i love her but i am always happy to point out her flaws and address them in au) in this episode in terms of Danny spying on them, but on the other hand I'll want to include a lot of set up in order to make Gray Ghost work in this au and wow will that take a while.

Especially with the Flirting with Disaster episode because it happens due to Technus' meddling, and Danny is, well, the son of the Batman? A trained assassin? An ex-assassin nonetheless, but still an assassin? A prodigy child in this au? He might not have needed to use most of his skills in the last few years, but like... there's just a bunch of 'what if' and 'well technically...' and 'would he? he could, but would he?' things that is getting in the way of my thought process and making my head spin.

.

Mmm. Okay. Flirting with Disaster occurs relatively the same as canon with a few exceptions; like Danyal noticing the strange coincidences, and he might take the idea into proper consideration because Sam has a point it is strange, especially out of nowhere.

However,,, he really enjoys Valerie's company, and he does really like her. He's been adjusting to civilian life for the last four years and while he's made a lot of progress, he's still. an ex-assassin child living like a wolf amongst sheep. This is normal, typical teenager stuff, and usually his friends like to encourage him doing normal teenager stuff.

So he's stubbornly holding out on the thought that this is normal, that ghost stuff isn't interfering here. He's a little hurt that his friends are discouraging this, he's not bothered by the fact that Valerie is a ghost hunter and he a ghost -- his mother is an assassin, and his father is Batman, and they still had a relationship. (Granted, he's not gonna tell them that)

If anything, being diametrically opposed to each other but still being in love is part of the family! Granted, usually both parties are aware of said opposition to each other, but he'll make a special exception this time around.

(And man now that i'm thinking about gray ghost, im now thinking about various like. scenes i could write between the two of them. maybe in a reblog.)

Anyways uhhh things relatively go the same as canon. Yeah. I think Sam still has a crush on Danny and still spies out of jealousy with Tucker.

.

Now, the Gregor episode! With that out of the way; the TVTropes recap for this episode isn't the best because it doesn't go into detail about the entire episode like it does with Flirting With Disaster and Shades of Gray.

(which i looked at earlier because I made a section of this post talking briefly about what changes I'd make to the Shades of Gray episode to help set up Gray Ghost, but ended up deleting because it was kinda irrelevant for the matter at hand.)

So I'm taking in bits of the episode clips at a time, I'll try not to get too nitpicky about how each scene goes because then it's gonna take me a longer time to write this.

But! First thing's first; since Danny is not romantically interested in Sam, he is also not jealous of Gregor. He is however, a bit eyebrow-raisey at him in their first introduction, but that's because Gregor is coming off as obnoxious.

Danny thinks he's kinda annoying, and it doesn't take a genius to see that Gregor is trying to impress Sam. But since they've only known him for five minutes he takes the good faith assumption and assumes that Gregor is genuinely trying to show interest in Sam's interests too because he likes her, so he keeps mum. The fake hungarian accent is weird, but it's overall harmless, so he doesn't point it out.

He does do the spying thing when he starts suspecting that Gregor might be working for the GIW. The episode only has this happen twice, but for the au this happens a handful of more times over the course of the week, with Danyal's suspicion steadily rising more and more each time.

Hah, when he brings up wanting to spy on Sam and Gregor because of this reason, Tucker still does his "woah! you wanna spy on Sam?" thing.

Danny immediately turns to him, completely unimpressed, and crosses his arms. "Tucker," he says, deadpan, "you and Sam spied on me and Valerie."

He uses a combination of his ghost powers and his regular stealth ability to spy on them. He's hiding in a tree when they're skipping rocks, close enough that he can use his powers to hear them talk but far enough away that he has a good view of their surroundings.

He's invisible in the cinema, but doesn't accidentally get in front of the projector. He checks the inside of the room for the GIW, and then waits outside the actual room itself, keeping an eye on the area and occasionally flying in to watch the movie out of boredom. It reminds him of being back on a recon mission with the League, but it doesn't end with him orchestrating someone's death.

Then when they're at the mall he stays in human form, blending in with the crowd. He runs into the GIW there, but realizes that they're not there because of Gregor; they're just shopping. They didn't show up at either of the last two locations, and he follows them to make sure they're not also trying to blend in. But they're literally just there for shopping.

Danny is rather pleased with this turnout; so far Gregor isn't a spy, he's just annoying. The next day at lunch he asks Sam how her date with Gregor went, and that's how she figures out he spied on them, because well, she didn't tell him that.

"Have you been spying on me?"

Danny messes with his food a little bit, and Tucker is sinking into his seat with embarrassment. He frowns, "Only last night. Those incompetent government dodos--"

His lip curls up; he gets all 'Shakespeare-y' (as Sam and Tucker put it) when he's insulting someone, "--kept appearing whenever Gregor did. I followed you and him last night to make sure he wasn't a spy."

A roundabout way of saying, "I was worried".

Sam is, as canon, furious. Danny understands why, he knows generally speaking that people don't like being spied on. But he's confused on just how angry she is, and is a little irritated by it.

"Why would you do that!" She exclaims, "That's way out of line, Danny."

"How? You spied on me when I was going on dates with Valerie." He narrows his eyes, and points his fork at her, "I'm not blind, I noticed."

"That's different, we told you why we were suspicious. And we don't have ghost powers like you do."

"I don't need ghost powers to sneak around, Sam, you've seen this firsthand. And I just told you why I followed you, I thought he was working with the guys in white--"

"So you think someone can only be interested in me if they're after you?" (this is a paraphrased quote, folks ;D)

"No! If that was the case I would have voiced my concern the moment I thought it. I don't get why you're so angry, you spied too."

Iiits.... a mess. Sam storms off with Gregor, Tucker tags along because okay, yeah, maybe Gregor isn't with the GIW, or maybe last night was a fluke. Either way he ends up tagging along. Danny overhears that conversation between the GIW and Mr. Lancer, and maybe he's right, maybe he's wrong; but something is up.

I've gotten to that scene in the locker room where Gregor tells Danny that he knows he doesn't like him, and I've paused at Danny's reply to say this: Danyal doesn't even bother trying to deny it.

"I know you do not like me."

"You're right; I don't."

"Ah, let me finish. I know you do not like me because you want to protect your friend, Sam, and I respect that."

"...That's correct."

"Good! Because I am going to ask her out."

"I had a feeling you'd say that," he stands up, claps his hand tight on Gregor's shoulder, and leans close to him with a threatening smile, "so you understand me when i say; if you break my best friend's heart, you're as good as dead, right?"

"Ah,, yes. I am so glad we got that cleared out of the way, and now I hope after we can.. how you Americans put it, hang out?"

In the episode he hugs Danny and gives him a la bise (which is that french greeting where you kiss someone on the cheek two or more times) after they end their conversation. But here, when he goes to do that to Danyal, Danny leans away, points an accusatory finger at him, and says; "Absolutely not; we are not close."

The next scene after that is like, end of day. Sam, Tucker, and Gregor walking away. Sam looks over her shoulder to glare at Danny, then gets forlorn. Tucker looks back and just looks forlorn.

(When did I start narrating each scene?? Eh, I'm writing this in brief spurts of time throughout the day. Don't fix what's not broke)

After that there's this whole scene with the two GIW agents that have been chasing Phantom all episode. They're there because they have Tucker's PDA that Skulker took, and it's got the information of their purple backed gorilla assignment on it. They've been going around seeing who Tucker associates with in hopes of catching Phantom.

Uhh ahaha and that is where this gets a little interesting imo, and also allows me to mention that im retconning Danyal's (already) redesigned ghost form. Which I've wanted to retcon even before this moment bc it was just too busy. I'll get to that in a moment.

The GIW suspect Gregor for being the Phantom because of his white hair and green eyes, which is all fine and dandy until you remember: Danyal (and by extension Phantom) has that very noticeable, rather identifiable facial scar that goes across the middle of his fucking face. The GIW could easily suspect that Phantom hides his scar with makeup if he's in disguise, but if they meet a kid with a seemingly identical facial scar and similar disposition? Hoo boy.

Solution? I've got two: Gregor is canonically a kid from Michigan who faked everything to impress Sam. Considering he knows she's gothic and knows that she's ultra-recyclo vegetarian? He probably watched her from afar or got information on her somehow. His hair is dyed, his eyes might just naturally be green, but if he notices that she's got a crush on either Danyal or Phantom? A little sfx makeup could help him recreate a similar looking scar.

My second solution that's gonna happen anyways bc its that suit redesign; Danyal does hide his face as Phantom. Ghosts are emotional creatures and its a popular headcanon that their interests, ambitions, etc, influence the way they look as a ghost, not just their death. A big reoccurring theme of my au is that Danyal did not leave the League unscathed, and that being an assassin is an important part of his identity.

So i'm discarding the hazmat suit look entirely and leaning into the 'assassin' thing. But the general (stylized) feel is like, white ribbon/cloth vambraces that he has used as a garrote at some point, a hood, a gaiter scarf-type thing. I'm keeping the cape. I did a doodle a few days back that's not the official redesign, but a redesign for Phantom. I may reblog this post with that attached because it's got the general feel down. There's very little white involved, but the inside of his cape flares out and looks like the night sky.

Now, the hood and gaiter scarf gets rid of most of the problem, but Danny's hood doesn't stay on all the time, so the GIW have likely seen the upper half of the scar. :] Gregor's own drawn-on scar doesn't have to be 1:1, but it looks close enough, right? A small scar cutting through the edge of his brow and ends right below the corner of his eye. A 'cool, badass' one opposed to Danny's 'garish' scar.

But! Back to the episode scene. Canon Danny gets written off as being 'too prepubescent' to be Phantom, and honestly it'd be hilarious if Danyal was written off for the same reason (he's calling them idiots in his head if they do). But instead -- leaning into the GIW's incompetence here -- he gets written off as being too mature or too talkative. Or something equally as absurd.

Sam breaks up with Gregor for canon reasons, but when Gregor does his "i really like you, but, come on-!" and gestures to tucker, he adds on "and that scary friend of yours too, seriously!"

Things go relatively the same as canon after that. Danny does end up apologizing for spying, however. Sam does it first. Sorrows, prayers, all that.

.

Things usually end up changed or different when I actually write it down, so I'd likely add more or adjust different scenes according to the flow of the oneshot. This is just like, a general vibe of how things would go, and where some of the more obvious changes would be if I did write this oneshot.

Hope you enjoyed! Thanks for the ask :]

[helluvapurf]

...so uhhhhh, "Apology Tour" was... *interesting*-

Didn't even seem that long ago since "Full Moon" came out so I didn't expect another ep drop this morning, buuuut welp! Lets discuss:

First off just to smoothen things up a bit, The Positives:

-Animation & visuals were quite pretty, and wasn't expecting the whole "spooky Halloween" aesthetic at Verosika's party (tho that may just be the summer season speaking lol) but hey, I kinda dig it~ 👀

-Verosika in-general, I was super stoked to see more of here! 💜and even with her staying pretty sassy/bitter towards Blitz... its honestly hard not to feel for her once she & him finally had that one-on-one convo (even revealing that she did legit love him... but Blitz simply couldn't stay with her due to his own commitment/intimacy issues ;-; ). And even if it was technically more of a pettiness move to theme her party around hating Blitz... in a way, its lowkey kinda sweet how much she wanted to help others "heal" from heartbreak? Aww... 🥺 Idk, do I still wish Verosika could've been more of the "major" character focus here (as Fizzarolli was in his past couple eps)? Absolutely. But for what its worth... I had fun watching her as I did💗 (& hopefully this won't be the last time Verosika appears story-wise, cause oml imagine the bonding potential of her, Blitz & Fizz as a reunited trio lol)

-That one incubus dude that flirted with Stolas (+kissed him) at the end seemed like a chill dude. Even if he most likely won't appear again, his vibe was fun to watch lol.

-OH, we finally get to see Mrs. Mayberry again, sweet~! :> ...and, she's apparently dating Martha now? Huh, thats... interesting, I guess? .3. (*wonder what happened to her husband/kids tho, 'cause I kiiiinda thought they would've landed in Hell too ngl-*)

...aaaaand okay yeah, that'll cover the Positives I've got atm. Now for The Negatives... ohhhhh boy:

-I... guess I'm not super alone in this opinion rn from what I've read from other fans, buuuuut... Stolas can you shut your entitled-hypocrite-mouth up for five minutes, please?? 🤦‍♀️Like, I know the dude's still reeling from how "Full Moon" ended, so him being in a mixed mood is to be expected tbh... but omllllll the way he was just SO smug, dramatic and pushy about being the "good guy" in how he & Blitz ended (-as if HE wasn't the one who set up their whole "transactional" dynamic since the start of the freakin' show?? =_=), even whining about the events of "Western Energy" (-when all Blitz was doing was prioritizing his daughter's well-being at the hospital, like a good dad should), was just... seriously?? >> Like... yes, Blitz may be a whole mess himself with how he's treated others (esp poor Verosika 💔), but that does NOT make Stolas a saint with how he handled things himself. From hanging the Grimoire over Blitz's head, creeping on him again & again, practically ragdoll-ing the poor guy's feelings during the crystal exchange (not even skipping a bit when Blitz was close to crying), aaaaand not to mention...

...so like, tell me how I'm expected to believe Blitz is the one who needs to do all this apologizing/groveling... WHEN HE DIDN'T EVEN DO ANYTHING TO STOLAS EXCEPT (RIGHTFULLY) CALLING THIS BLUEBLOOD BIRD OUT ON HIS BS?? 😑

*sighs* Sorry, didn't mean to get heated there but... yiiiikes is this show sending so many mixed messages of where I'm supposed to stand with these two, I can't keep up anymore- 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

-As much as I get what the ep was trying to do in having Blitz see past his own ego/apologize to others… Iiiiii'd be lying if I said I didn't feel just a tad bit uncomfortable at the increasing Blitz hate, throughout the party-sequence ^^; Like, I know he's a shitty guy who's done shitty things, and absolutely he needs to recognize how much he's hurt those like Verosika (& his other exes)… buuuuut tying into my previous point, it just rings rather unfair that most of this seems mostly spurned from him rejecting Stolas, of all people? ._. When… again, they were NEVER an actual couple like him & Verosika were, instead were just a simple once-a-month hookup deal that soured 'cause of Stolas' mess of a "confession"… y'all really expect me to believe Blitz is the bad guy for not immediately accepting the "feefee's" of a privileged, horny prince (aka: the one who did hold the Grimoire over his head since S1's "Murder Family")? …Ehhhh, sorry but I am NOT buying that crap lmao -x- 👎

[kiwisofsharks]

Yo, don’t do that shit too much [M.M. 1610 & 42]

summary: he found your secret stash and confronted you

pairings: earth 1610! miles morales x gn! reader & earth 42! miles morales x gn! reader

warnings: unedited and not proofread, weeds, edibles, mentiojs of addiction/dependency/relapsing, miles and reader is too affectionate for friends, reader has a soft stomach, they communicate healthily, not really satisfied with this one, might rewrite it when get better, midterms just finished and I’m sick rn

notes: requested by @sflame15-blog, idk if you’ll like it, cus i don’t like it that much. could’ve done better, i think its unrealistic. I’ll revise it when i get better <3

earth 1610 miles morales

“Weeds are illegal and you should never try it,” is what his dad always tell him if they detain another intoxicated person after causing trouble in town.

That’s why I think he’ll never even think of trying to touch those things. So it surprised him when he found some of your stash, especially since you’re pretty close with his parents and would always agree with his father.

He’ll lament on how to confront you for weeks. Not sure if he should even confront you about it since he doesn’t smell it on you; he just found some random plastic ziplock in your room, doesn’t mean it’s yours, right?

He tried acting normal whenever he’s with you. But his staring is less than normal in your opinion. It’s obvious he wants to tell you something. You also know that someone has found your stash, not sure who but you guess its miles considering that he’s being weird and all.

I think he’ll be more worried about your health rather than the fact that you smoke weed. He won’t tell on you, he’s not a snitch.

Will try to make you stop. He’ll do it discreetly if you’re not willing. Call him manipulative but he knows that you shouldn’t be taking those.

Miles sit quietly on your beanbag (or maybe it was your room mate’s? He never asked) his eyes poking holes at the back your head while you sit in your desk studying. He went to your room for some company while he reads his comic, but he’s just really there to try and maybe finally ask you about the stash.

“Quit staring, Morales. If you have something to say, just say it. Thought were way past the awkward stage?”

“Huh? I’m not staring, who says I’m staring?”

Turning your chair to face him with a questioning look. Your brow raised at his behavior. “Really, Miles?” Squinting at his eyes, you telepathically egged him to spill why he’s been so weird recently.

“Okay! So I found something and… I didn’t find it on purpose, okay? I just found it by accident!”

“You found my weeds, didn’t you?”

“yea.” Miles looked away from you like you just found out that he stole something from a shop. He looked so guilty while trying to explain that he didn’t really mean to see it.

“Nah, you’re fine. I’ve been meaning to stop anyways. Just gave me more reason to push through. Just relapsing is all. I’m not planning to use it or anything! It just helps that I know I have some if ever I need it.”

“Oh, okay. Cool cool.” He paused, swinging back and forth on the bean bag as if its a swing. “So you’re not mad that I found it?”

“Not really, but as punishment you need to try these cookies.” You replied, pulling out a metal container from one of your drawers, the few pieces of cookies inside making a sound as it hits the metal container.

Immediately standing up from his seat, he stood in front of you as you handed him one. “Oh, nice! I really like cookies, you know that right?” Taking a bite from it, he hums and observed the cookie while he chews. “Little on the dryer side, did you make them?”

“Nah, I bought them. They’re called edibles, it’s what I use now.”

He stops his chewing completely and just stared at you. Not willing to move his jaw even the slightest. “So it has weed in if?”

“Yea, but not too much. I’m just lessening my in take more and more until I completely stop.”

“Okaaay, I did not like that dry ass cookie, should’ve known that no normal cookie would be that dry unless you’re really bad at it.”

Throwing your head back from laughing, you took a bite from your cookie while still giggling as Miles put down his and proceeded to chug down water from his tumbler. “It’s not that bad, Miles.”

“In all seriousness tho, I’m glad that you’re willing to stop, yn.”

“Yea, thanks, guapito.”

Rolling his eyes and turning his back to you to hide his blush. He returned to plop down at the bean bag and hide his blush with the comic book. Though you can still see his red ears from the sides. Seriously, he doesn’t know whether to hate it or love it when you tease him like that.

earth 42 miles morales

He actually caught you in the act. Miles barged into your room as usual without knocking and caught you red handed while lighting one up, some sticks still laying on your desk and a few used ones on an ashtray that he doesn’t know you have.

He knows what those were, and he also knows that you shouldn’t be smoking that shit.

Unlike his 1610 counterpart who took his time confronting you, earth 42 miles stole the stick directly from your hand along with the other used and unused one and dumped it all on your trashcan, poured water over it and got into a heated argument over it.

He knows you became reliant on it, maybe even addicted. He studied that shit and while it is proven to have relived some of the patients’ pain, you shouldn’t be taking it.

While arguing with you, he keeps staring at your once clear eyes now red due to marijuana. You never scream nor raise your tour voice at anyone, so to find you so mad baffled him.

He knows he reacted too badly, but what do you expect him to do? Act like he didn’t see it?

While you’re too preoccupied getting mad at him, he pressed a pressure point at the back of your neck. Catching your body as you loose consciousness.

When you woke up the next day, you found him slumped at your desk.

You stood up beside him, gently shaking him awake. “Miles, wake up.”

Moving his arms to hug your waist and bury his face in your soft stomach “Just five more minutes, mami.”

“Move to the bed, your back’ll hurt if you don’t sleep properly.” You said, massaging the exposed scalp between his braids.

Groaning he finally stood up, refusing to release his hold on you and waddling to the bed like a penguin. Miles flopped down onto the bed, still having you in his hold. He burrowed his face into you neck, deeply inhaling your natural scent and some smoke that clung to your clothes from last night. “I’m sorry for how I reacted last night, ma.” He whispered, his breath tickling your skin and hair standing from the sensation. “Didn’t mean to be so harsh, I just… that’s bad for you. I don’t want you doing that shit.“

“I know, Miles. You meant good,” Hugging his head closer to you while your other hand rubs his back. You know Miles gets extremely guilty when he does something he doesn’t mean to you and it takes a whole lot of convincing and reassurance to get him to calm down.

“Stop taking that shit, ma. I’ll help you. Just don’t destroy yourself.” His voice trembles, Miles was close to crying, something he only shows you and his mother. “I don’t know why you’re taking those, but if you’re stressed and you just want relief, I’ll help you. I’ll distract you or maybe take you on dates, just stop taking those.”

Your own eyes watered from the cracks in his voice. Miles knows that you’re addicted, he searched through your room last night, finding stash after stash of those leaves. “I’ll try, Miles. I’m sorry for worrying you.”

“Damn right you should be.”

[autistic-katara]

stuff i wanna see in TSATS

its just less than 2 months until TSATS comes out and my pjo phase is coming back HARD so heres some stuff i wanna see (idc how popular or unpopular these r)

Solangelo kiss (seriously like all the other good canon couples had one)

explicit use of queer terms (i havent rlly seen anyone talk abt this but as much as i love queer characters just existing u have no idea how happy it makes me to see media, especially kids media, explicitly say the words gay, bisexual, transgender, lesbian, etc.)

Hunters of Artemis cameo

piggybacking off that, Nico’s reaction to Reyna being a hunter (ive wanted to see this since 2019 PLEASE i gotta know how he feels abt this considering yk his past w/ them)

confirmation on whether Will’s gay or bi/mspec (or just simply queer, no specific labels necessary)

a trans/nonbinary character (specifically transmasc)

a Piper cameo

during her cameo Piper explicitly saying her sexuality (which is lesbian, if u think otherwise ur wrong/hj)

Hazel cameo

more Lavinia content (idc how i just need more of my chaotic Jewish ADHD pink-haired Russian lesbian, ok?)

GAY ANGST

MORE GAY ANGST

SO MUCH GAY ANGST ITLL MAKE MY AO3 HISTORY LOOK LIKE A HAPPY HETEROSEXUAL PURE BIBLE CLUB FOR TODDLERS

canonically autistic Nico

that Lil Nas X reference we were promised

Nico making more trauma jokes (he just like me fr)

the multiple coming out scenes i heard were allegedly promised

Hades and/or Apollo cameo

Hestia cameo

Jason’s ghost cameo

dead Apollo kids cameo

explicit discussion of Nico’s religious trauma

explicit discussion of just Will’s trauma in general (seriously we all kinda ignore that our “sunshiney golden retriever uwu gay boi 😊🌸��☀️” actually has some super serious trauma)

both of them coping badly with all this and being worried abt eachother (aka gay angst but more specific)

Maria di Angelo content

Persephone cameo w/ her either still lowkey hating Nico and being passive aggressive asf to him or having had him grow on her in the past few years and is now turning the overprotective mom mode to the max

just some cute, non-angsty moments between Nico nd Will cause goddam we need some queer joy rn ;-;

so much hurt/comfort u physically cant continue living anymore (going both ways not just Will comforting Nico)

a MCGA cameo

Fierrochase and Solangelo meeting and having the same funny interactions they have in the memes (but with the canon versions of them)

discussions of stuff like homophobia and internalized homophobia and mental illness

a relatively happy ending (but not a “2 months later and the world is perfect and neither of them had felt anything close to depression or anything since the ending and if for some reason addiction was a part of this we would we talking abt how they were magically 2 months clean and it would be physically impossible for the thought of relapse to even cross their mind” kinda happy ending cause i hate those kinda endings w/ a burning passion)

setup for another side book (preferably a Piper or Reyna one)

thats all i can think of rn off the top of my head but feel free to comment on any of these or add ur ideas cause 2 months feels like an eternity long wait + hearing other opinions is fun when we arent all in a heated argument over smthn stupid

[stilljuststardust]

I’m a 15 years old girl and my parents are very homophobic

Today my mom made me sat down because she thinks that I wanna turn into a boy and she told me for my old sis to also come downstairs to talk about it cause they found it weird mind you they’re very religious

After my big sis came downstairs my mom started talking about how I act like a boy when I’m a girl also that God made me a girl so why would I try to change into a girl and also said that if I keep acting like this she would take all my electronics

And send me somewhere else where I won’t see her and my siblings ever again

I’m crying so much because I did everything to change myself to become normal like others straight but nothing works and I found out that I want to be a boy I tried everything like manifesting being a man nothing it working and circumstances keeps getting worse and worse till the point it making me depressed like maybe I’m stuck this way maybe I will never be a man

I’m so scared cause she said if I don’t change I will not have access to phone I’m having a bad breakdown rn idk what to do anymore I’m so lost

But part of me still believes I’m a man no matter what

Hello, before I give you LOA advice let's talk

You ARE a man. You are a man. You are a man.

You are a man no matter what.

You don't have to do anything to be a man. It's who you are deep down in the pit of your soul. You already are a man.

Not just in an LOA sense, I'm saying this from a non-manifesting perspective: you are not a girl.

You will never be a girl, you never were. Do you understand that? Who you are as a person is a man.

I'm like you.

It's ok to be a trans. Being trans is normal. Half my friends are trans, I'm trans. You aren't alone, you aren't the only one. There is nothing wrong with you.

Firstly I would like to say, always always always prioritize your safety and well-being.

I know it's easier said than done but the closet exists for a reason. It keeps us safe. Do not come out if it would put you in danger. You do not have to be out to be valid.

I hate that my advice is to fawn and pretend to be something you're not, but its safest sometimes.

It feels so far away now, but there will be a time when you are free to be who you are. You will find people who support you. You will find people who are like you. When I was in your place 18 felt so far away and unreachable, but it's not. Freedom will come. Please hold on.

Link to The Trevor project. (Councilors and hotline for queer people who are struggling mentally)

Loa

At the end there will be a handful of LOA posts I think you should read/you might be interested in + subliminals for you. The most important one in my opinion being the one I list first.

The law gets over complicated alot. At the end of the day it boils down to this.

An assumption, though false, if persisted in will harden into fact.

An assumption being something you accept as the truth without needing evidence and persistence meaning you assume regardless of what the 3D shows you.

Essentially, you decide you have your desire and you are stubborn in that decision.

It's ok to feel intense emotions, it's ok to be scared and hurt and frustrated, you just have to assume that no matter what the physical world shows you you are undeniably biologically male.

There is no more advice to give, there is only the law. Assume, affirm, persist.

The posts

How I manifested my dream life with extremely hard circumstances (blushydior)

If it's too long a read (seriously I think you should read the whole thing either way) here's the parts I thought would benefit you the most

What you need to know about loa

How to ignore the 3D

Nothing is true until you decide it is

It's ok to feel like shit

Loa checklist

Subliminals and affirmation tapes

Revise past negative events

Desired body

Mind over matter

It's done

Your desire is a fact

I keep getting results

If you need motivation

@loasuccessarchive

[theblogwithoutfear]

my question is do people even like or are interested in karen page outside of a shipping context? cause going through her tags on here it's nothing but karen being discussed in terms of shipping her with frank and almost 90% of it is karen x frank content...doesn't that speak to the level of how interesting and compelling she actually is if people are only interested in talking about her when it's time to ship her with frank 😬 and barely anything about the merits of her own character? 😬 just pondering i guess

I mean, it's Tumblr. Shipping is basically this site's bread and butter. Especially given that Karen is a secondary character, it makes sense that most of the posts about her are shipping-related. That's just an issue with the data pool, lol.

You do you, but for me, I prefer to engage with media on its own terms, and decide its merit based on the text itself. While it can sometimes be useful to take into consideration the thoughts of the masses, in general I don't think that's a reliable indicator of the quality of a text (or a specific character, in this case). People are extremely influenced by the opinions of others, and that's only exacerbated in a social media context. Opinions change and shift over time, which is normal. Things that were once beloved have since been panned. Things that were once lambasted are now lauded. Look at the works of Stephen Sondheim, for example; the general opinion of audiences at the time were rarely indicative of the quality of his work (I'm reading his biography so it's on the brain rn, lol). So for me, no. I don't necessarily take into account the internet's opinions when I am engaging with a text.

Personally, I find Karen Page incredibly compelling, both within the context of her various relationships, and on her own merits. Her arc as she goes from a foolhardy, reckless mess to a confident, intelligent, even dangerous journalist is one of the highlights of the show to me. As is her struggle to come to terms with her feelings for Matt and what he does, and the concept of extralegal justice at large. I love watching her work through a traumatic past, continually fall into old toxic patterns, and claw her way out again. To me, that is compelling, regardless of what people on the internet think.

Again, you do you—people are free to like or dislike a character, to ship or not to ship, what have you. But I don't think that the easily-swayed opinions of Tumblr or the internet at large is an objective indicator of the quality of any piece of media—especially when people are predisposed to dislike her because of ingrained misogyny.

[lilioopdf]

Do you think that there is a possibility that Pepe might be considering quitting racing altogether?

I say this because I recently saw an excerpt of an interview, where Pepe mentioned that he nearly quit racing in 2020, after a bad year, until his parents encouraged him to keep going.

He's had a terrible year this year and this last weekend with the crash left him visibly shook in a way I haven't seen him before.

Plus, he has joined university and I'm not sure what the point of that is, if he's really serious about his racing career. Other drivers like Ollie Bearman quit school early and have said that you need to give racing your 110%, which you can't do, if you are trying to do school and racing at the same time.

Finishing school is one thing but I was very surprised when I heard that Pepe was pursuing university as well. It might be a controversial opinion, but I don't think that's the right move for him, when he's already struggling in F2 this year. He needs to focus and give more time to racing next year, but instead, he is putting more on his plate and risking not maximising his chances and giving racing his best shot next year too.

He's so young, he can always pursue university later if he needs to, instead of doing it now, when it's going to potentially affect his chances of succeeding in motorsports, where there is such a narrow window of opportunity, which he only has now and which won't be available in the future.

oh my god the way i completely forgot about that interview until you brought it up

ABOUT THE UNI THING THOUGH OMG i asked my friend the EXACT same thing and she told me she doesn’t think he plans on quitting racing just from “vibes” so i was like yeah okay whatever but honestly i get what you mean too because in my mind, uni is such a time consuming and overwhelming commitment the way racing is and he will (ultimately) have to choose what he wishes to prioritise more in his life

i know lorenzo fluxa once mentioned that he was starting uni soon in a prema vid (but i think that vid was posted like a year ago), and now he’s currently racing in elms (i think?? ill have to check) and idk if he’s still pursuing his education but he is basically doing what pepe is doing yk? and if he is still in uni rn, i feel like that just shows that studying while racing is still very possible (although i do think its very tiring and honestly, not very smart because you won’t be able to fully commit to either)

but i also believe that pepe’s family really does prioritise having a good educational background, because there was also an article talking about how his mum was very proud of the fact that her son was one of the few drivers in f3 who actually completed his compulsory education. plus pepe has mentioned multiple times that his mum/parents wanted him and his sisters to speak really good english and therefore put them in educational institutions/with educators that could teach them to be perfect english speakers so it would maybe make sense that a uni degree was always a part of what was planned for him in his life

and idk if this is weird but his family basically founded (i think??) movento, and its a really big company in spain LOL (ofc i mean racing is expensive and they have to fund him somehow) and i think there are quite a few family members who are a part of the company and in the more higher ranking positions in the company, so then i looked at their linked in (not stalked!! because it’s public info anyway) and they all come from pretty good edcational backgrounds so having a good education was probably (again) what was always expected of pepe

i think itll be unfortunate if he ends up quitting though because if we sit down and properly think for a sec, there’s already been millions lost to funding his career so far, and i know racing already caused him to not do as well in high school, and that he himself thought it was so amazing that he ended up passing his IBs so BASICALLY what im trying to say is that chances are, he might not be in a very good uni because of entry requirements and etc. (unless he paid for a spot somewhere? maybe?) and his degree will still be a degree, but it’s not the same as a degree from a better educational institution and that if he does quit racing, it’s probably just a degree that will help him either work in his family company in the future, or go back into racing in a different position like an engineer or something idk (i mean he’s mentioned the engineer part before so it wouldn’t be completely shocking yk)

atill idk aaaa there’s sm more i wanted to say but i’m typing this as i rush to get ready for a formal dinner so i’m def missing out on stuff and making mistakes in my speech but omg thank u for bringing this up i hope youre having a lovely day/night rn

[silverskye13]

(sorry if this got sent twice, internet is very spotty at the moment) Rotating RnS Helsknight in my mind. I keep debating what dnd paladin oath he'd swear. Glory is fitting but also seems TOO obvious. I almost want to say Devotion just for the irony/contrast of it, and since he genuinely wants to make Hels better, and it would make RnS Wels lose his entire mind if he found out

Oooo I have a soft spot for this, because in my Curse of Strahd campaign right now, my paladin Ashborne is just beginning-of-RnS Helsknight. I couldn't think of a good character so I just built Helsknight as a fire genasi, except instead of Tanguish he has a shadow god sitting on his shoulder telling him to kill people, and instead of a crippling fear of death its a crippling fear of never being used to his full potential by his god.

........ Anyway.

DnD Paladin Helsknight rambles under the cut!

In my opinion, I kind of have to agree that Helsknight best matches Oath of Devotion. The oaths especially line up almost perfectly with his knightly tenets:

Courage. Never fear to act, though caution is wise. [May you meet every obstacle with courage, for just as all that emits light must endure burning, all the courageous must make a brother of their fears.]

Honesty. Don't lie or cheat. Let your word be your promise. [May your word be binding as chains.]

Compassion. Aid others, protect the weak, and punish those who threaten them. Show mercy to your foes, but temper it with wisdom. [Any sword raised to the innocent or unarmed in cruelty is blackened by its shame.]

Honor. Treat others with fairness, and let your honorable deeds be an example to them. Do as much good as possible while causing the least amount of harm. [May you respect the honor of your fellow helsmet, that none may know you cruel or slave to vice.]

Duty. Be responsible for your actions and their consequences, protect those entrusted to your care, and obey those who have just authority over you. [May you persevere to the end of any enterprise begun, for the folly is theirs that, through unfinished business, never gain wisdom from deeds done.]

There's also stuff that hasn't been breeched in the plot yet that are... Eerily similar to plot points I have planned. Holy Weapon, for example, I think in the Colosseum Helsknight uses a flamed sword, which is functionally the same as enchanting your weapon with holy damage for the coolness factor [Channel Divinity: Sacred Weapon]. And if you outright asked Hels if he was inspiring, he would probably say no. But anyone within 10ft of him probably wouldn't be charmed against him by someone persuasive like the Demon [7th level Aura of Devotion]. Given how handily I think Helsknight fights Welsknight, and how I think he negates Wels's... For the sake of DnDing I'm going to say fey energy and persuasiveness, Purity of Spirit is a good match.

[Don't have a lot to say about the Lvl20 Holy Nimbus, because tbh that's one of the weakest level 20 paladin boons I think there is. Flat 10 radiant damage every round for enemies within 30ft of you is handy, but the saving throws only have advantage if the spellcasters are fiends and undead, and there are many, many big angry critters in DnD that are neither of those two monster types.]

I do think a Helsknight with access to the spell Flamestrike would be absolutely terrifying though lol.

On a more vibes level, when I started the story, I thought Helsknight was a lot closer to Oath of Conquest, with how he treated Welsknight specifically [which is, incidentally, why my CoS paladin Ashborne is Oath of Conquest]. The tenets don't match Helsknight's too terribly well [they're mostly to the effect of "kill all your enemies so dead that everyone is too terrified to stand against you."] However the Channel Divinities of Conquering Presence [everyone you can see is terrified of you now] and Guided Strike [I'm so pissed at you specifically that I will kill you supernaturally easily] align well with angry chapters 1-8 Helsknight. And one could argue every time he's angry, Tanguish is cowering under the Aura of Conquest [anything scared of you is now too scared to move and takes psychic damage.] And I think in text Helsknight does Scornful Rebuke on the regular [anytime something hits you, they are psychically punished for their audacity up to your Charisma modifier.]

[Level 20 Invincible Conquerer basically turns you into a barbarian paladin, which is badass. Helsknight can't do that, but that's so so cool.]

For the spells, Armor of Agythis as Helsknight's thorns armor is compelling to me, and Command, Hold Person and Fear are just things Helsknight can do to people when he's angry enough [also Compelled Dual, but all paladins get that].

If anything, I feel like Helsknight started RnS as Oath of Conquest, and then when he became friends with Tanguish, switched immediately to Oath of Devotion.

[Meanwhile if I had to make Tanguish a paladin, I think he would be Oath of Redemption, but I'll save that rant for some other time.]

[seerasworld]

Alright I usually post once every 10 years but I gotta rant about the state of the fandom rn:

I'm floored by this new "trend" of entitled haters writing mind-boggling things like "you MUST take the hate without defending yourself or your LIs cause I'm right and you're wrong" or "you don't have the right to feel upset by what I wrote, you're just too sensitive, go touch grass". Obviously paraphrasing a little here but that's legit the gist of it.

As if that wasn't enough, the same pro-hate blogs will fly off the handle and gang up on anyone who doesn't rain praise on their own faves no matter how polite the discussion which is hyprocrisy at its highest level.

I could maybe close an eye about the character hate even though it wouldn't kill anyone to express dissatisfaction in healthy/funny/constructive ways, but being rude to real people over pixels? The gratuitous disrespect? Shaming people because they don't have the same tastes/likes/dislikes? Attacking strangers just because you don't agree with their personal opinions? Invalidating anyone who isn't a fellow hater? Not letting someone share their thoughts because that's "excusing" a fictional dudebro you don't like? The disgusting intimidation tactics?? HOW ABOUT NO??

[the-sappho-of-lesbos]

hi, sorry if this isnt a good blog to send this to i just dont know where to turn atm (if this isnt a good blog to ask for help plz lmk where would be better, soz). im 22 and figuring out im sapphic & im trying to join online lesbian spaces but everyone seems so anti-babydyke and im starting to notice that being a lesbian is more about discourse and infighting than it is about wanting to kiss a lady. i thought it was about kissin ladies and thats what i want but how do i make other lesbians not hate me? i feel like all of the other lesbians expect me to have a PhD in lesbianism before i call myself that, before i consider a femme attractive, its like i have to pass thru all these hoops to prove myself even to other queers that im a real lesbian because i can name every lesbian historical figure. again super sorry if this is a bad blog to send this to i do not have a clue who to ask about this or anything im totally lost rn lol (genuinely sorry for literally being that annoying baby dyke ppl complain about rn. ignore me if you want im not gonna be tilted. thx for listening

This isn’t a bad blog to send this too. I’m just genuinely sorry you are going through this and I’m sorry if I don’t have a way to help. But I’ll try my best!! And maybe some more people in the comments will be able to help in ways I can’t.

But just know I’m sending you lots of love and that there isn’t anything wrong with you. At the end of the day, regardless of whatever else is happening, your sexuality really is just simply who you are attracted to. And that’s okay. You are enough ♥️♥️

(I’m also going into this assuming you are at least 18+, so I apologise if I’m wrong on that )

Firstly , you aren’t just seeing things. There is definitely a lot of infighting in the community. Like a lot. I would say it’s typically more intense and in your face online then it is IRL, but I’ve also seen IRL gay groups go really deep off the end with with this stuff.

From what I have read and from people I have talked to, this has sadly sort of always been a thing. We just have different waves of it and different things it might be focused on based on the time period and the world events affecting that at the time. I think in general it’s a very human thing that allllll groups do, but when you are in a marginalised, oppressed and small group of people it can feel a whole lot more concentrated and obvious because there is less room for it to go.

Again, this is just based on conversations I’ve had and things I’ve read, so take it with a grain of salt. But there has also been misunderstandings, disagreements and different beliefs on what things are , what they mean and who should do what in the community. Ranging from politics to fashion to marriage to sex to identities around butch/femme and what it means. For one piece saying something you have another saying something different.

This can cause a lot of confusion and infighting amongst people. A lot of tension at times. And because of trauma a lot of people tend to want to be around people with similar alignments in understanding and belief.

A lot of things can affect that like age , location etc.

But none of that is a reflection of you or your worth or your sexuality. And there ARE people in the same boat as you. Even when it doesn’t feel like it.

There have been waves in the past of some women using and or claiming lesbianism to be a response to sexism. We are currently living in the time after that. And because of that a lot of opinions and thoughts and actions taken place are in a response to that wave. Be it people trying to push it , denounce it , confused by it or hurt by it.

I think this has lead to some of the scaffolding of the current culture we have today.

I understand that need and drive for community and the horrible feeling that can come along when the said community feels like it is in shambles. I feel that way a lot too. And I’m sorry I can’t take that away.

I feel like I’m rambling at this point I’m sorry.

I just want to say though there is nothing you have to prove to anyone. We all figure this stuff out at our own pace. Anyone who treats you poorly for not knowing something or just genuinely not showing interest in it is on them. Your lesbianism doesn’t mean you owe anyone an opinion or a certain way of dressing or feeling. The only person you owe is yourself and that is to show kindness to yourself and be around people who respect you and love you for the wonderful lesbian that you are.

EDIT : I just re-read and you said you are 22 I’m so sorry I missed that 😩

[kosmicdream]

answered some OTP questions from some post i found for Knife/Spoon, altho specifically Knife/Scissor.. more of a little writing exercise i guess

How did they meet?

Knife hunted him down for his space crimes. It was kind of an unusual target because Knife usually doesn’t go back to DMTIA, but Simon kicked up enough fuss to draw attention across the solar system, as well as claiming to be a McGold. Obviously, once they met Knife made arrangements to get Simon hired by thumb instead of imprisoned. 

How long have these two characters known each other?

Honestly its changed a couple times bc i’m bad at math, but im pretty sure its around 80 years. 

What were their first impressions of each other? How does that compare to their impressions of each other now?

Simon was excited to meet Knife and wanted to make a big impression because of his fame but was initially really disappointed with Knife and kind of threw a tantrum. Because he was already throwing one because Nail ruined his plans by fighting Knife first. Not having things go exactly his way with the encounter made him spiral and impulsively do things. He complained the entire flight back to the stars and Knife had to keep him restrained because he kept trying to fight or like crash the ship into an asteroid. Knife thought Simon was the kind of weird funny freak that would work well at Thumb and be a good asset to the team, plus he was so pathetic he kind of felt bad for him and squishing the worm friend he had. 

Their impressions now are kind of ?????.. How would i even summarize it.. Umm.. In a strange way I think Knife idolizes the aspect of Simon’s personality that seems unaffected by guilt, without really understanding that Simon is affected by guilt and is constantly propelled by his own panic. He just avoids accountability and has a facade he upholds. I would say Simon is still very good at adapting to unusual situations on the fly, despite how extreme they are, but his upbringing caused him to be accustomed to overstimulation. The reason why Knife idolizes this false perception of how Simon copes with his guilt is because I think he wants to be able to be a bit more like Simon and reach some kind of moral clarity, even if its not an appropriate or even “good” one. In some ways, i think he wants Simon to fix what’s wrong with him somehow. I would say this isn’t the attitude Knife had in the entire course of their relationship, at first he wanted to maintain a really different dynamic between them and ruled it with an iron grip - before things got too complicated. But at this stage in the story, Knife’s very emotionally lost and is using Simon as an anchor and thus putting him in a bit of a pedestal. He is actually physically sick though and does need help there, which Simon probably is the only person who can provide that care. 

Simon’s opinion of Knife is that he’s generally very frustrated with him because of how stubborn he is, which has always been difficult to obey the RULES because Knife’s rules have been contradictory. At this point he’s kind of on edge, because um. Knife came back to life suddenly, is also sick and also apparently is more malleable in his plans than ever before.. Which up until this point, has never really been his thing. It makes him a bit suspicious but he is curious what else has changed. He also is straight up terrified about it but he has to deal because this is possibly his last chance with making things right between them. 

How would they describe each other if asked? Physically? In personality?

Knife isn’t gonna say anything fdkhfg Simon would just complain and insult Knife if asked. But that’s all fake you know he would go on rants about how perfect Knife is and the reason he’s still alive. 

Do they get along? Why or why not?

Do they????? The boys have a lot of relationship problems RN that have stacked up for decades but i’m still inclined to say yes. They at least are able to work as a team on the fly if the situation is tense enough (like anal prolapse.) 

Do they have any shared interests/hobbies? Do they ever do these hobbies together?

Murdering.. I guess.. JK they do dance as a couple which both enjoy. They also enjoy racing videogames but Simon almost always wins. 

How often do they see each other? Where do they usually meet?

I mean they used to live together, so they saw eachother every day. Even when they were living separately while Fork was growing up, They��d visit frequently or see eachother at work. It was usually Knife going to Simon’s place in the middle of the night though. 

How do they communicate with each other? Are there any recurring phrases or gestures unique to their relationship?

I feel like this is a complicated one to answer but I’d say that Knife allows and even gets pleasure from Simon hurting him, which he doesn’t really enjoy pleasure without that context. Alternatively, Simon doesn’t enjoy tenderness unless its from Knife. Even if he has a positive relationship with Cash, if she gets too into feelings it gives him the ick. So that’s usually only saved for serious moments, which usually have the mood deflated by a joke or something to balance out things from being too genuine. But with Knife he can be really tender and genuine without hating the experience. 

What is one quality they have in common?

Desperation?

What is one major difference between them?

Simon loves Knife but Knife does not love Knife, which causes a lot of problems. Knife Loves Simon but Simon doesn’t really know himself, so he thinks whatever Knife loves is whatever he is doing so he wants to keep doing that right so Knife loves him. 

Does one act as a narrative foil to the other? How so?

Oh probably. But if you ask me I’m not exactly sure what it is yet since there are so many foils and narratives in ffak lol

Do they have any affection for each other? How do they show it?

Knife climbs into Simon’s skin and Simon goes “squee!.” Also Simon does boring mundane life stuff with Knife to help him have that “normal life fantasy” that he craves so much. 

Do they have any disdain/contempt for each other? How do they show it?

Oh sure they do. Knife feels betrayal for the cheating, but Simon feels betrayal for Fork replacing him and you know Knife faking his own death. Knife shows it by avoiding all his loved ones for years i guess. Simon doubles down on bad behavior to upset Knife worse but that only makes everyone more miserable.

Do they share the same goals in life?

They used to have the same killing everyone goal yeah, but not anymore. At least for Simon, he’s got new ones.

Do they trust each other? Why or why not?

IDK .. they both navigate “trust” in a really toxic codependent twisted way, but at least in their minds they “completely” trust eachother - but that also kind of includes the aspects of the other they trust is very unpredictable and unclear. Instead of open communication, they’ve kind of accepted it as an aspect of the other person rather than trying to change it or properly address it. I’d say at this point, Simon does not trust Knife as much as he used to, by a severe amount. Knife at the moment is putting too much trust in Simon, without realizing that he might be mislead or lied to about things, because he feels he’s the one who has wronged more in the relationship at this point. (even with Simon’s cheating.) 

Is one of them keeping secrets from the other? Why? How would they react if the secret was revealed?

Well, I’m not gonna say how they’d react! But both of them are keeping secrets from eachother, although Knife is very willing to lay it all out on the table finally. He isn’t really giving Simon enough breathing room to process it all. 

Are they keeping a secret together? How do they feel about that?

They were keeping their relationship a secret from Fork. Which Simon hated doing, but was serious about keeping it for Knife. 

Do they view their relationship as temporary or permanent?

Both view it pretty permanent. I think that’s something that’s been maintained even before they dated and the roles were more mentor/student. Simon fixated into the “devoted follower” role faster than he realized. 

Are they satisfied with their relationship? Do they wish they were closer/more distant?

They were very satisfied, now its a mess and has been that way for decades. Both wanted to make it back to what it was but Simon sees that as impossible, so he wants to make it into something better - at least hoping that growth will be the best answer to their problems than trying to recreate their old dynamic. The hardest part will be actually letting go from that, which is easier said than done and Simon already can tell he’s going to struggle keeping that goal in mind. 

What is their best memory together?

Hard to say, cause its not really specific. More like “walking around somewhere with him” is probably what they both think of the most. 

What is their worst memory together?

The big “kicking you out” breakup. Or Knife discovering Simon’s sexual relationship with Cash LOL. That was an ugly fight. Simon’s worst is uh, I guess Knife dying and fixating on their last encounter, which he thought was their last one. 

When were they the most vulnerable with each other?

Hard to say, they’ve certainly been vulnerable plenty of times. 

Do they have any mutual friends? Mutual enemies?

Knife doesnt have any friends LMAOOOOOO yeah they probably got 1 billion mutual enemies. Nail/Mop is probably one which comes to mind the quickest.

How do these two interact with each other in public versus in private?

Well in public they’re kind of vaguely distant with obvious tension, in private its very mushy gushy romance. 

If a stranger saw them together, how would they describe their relationship?

I dunno, they’d probably assume Knife hated all the affectionate attention Simon gives him. He’s just a tsundere. 

How would these characters react to being stuck in a small room with each other?

They’d be surprisingly okay for a while. Although i think Knife would start to have a traumatic panic attack and hurt Simon idk.

How far would they go for each other? Would they risk their own lives for each other?

TOO far. Of course they’d risk their own lives!!!!! this is anime!

[yagamisdiary]

hey girl let me just vent about how sexy you are ok. So the year is 2021 I'm in bed scrolling through Tiktok and keep on seeing girls crying over Eren fanfiction and I thought who are these dumb bitches crying about Eren fanfiction let me tell you I'm the eren yeager fanfiction library I know the ins and outs of every eren yeager fanfictions its in my blood yk anyways, I enjoyed them but I never cried over them and stuff at the TIME. so I'm like the girls never lie, so I got on my little reading app I don't know if you've heard of it, but it's called w-w-wattpad anyways type up parasite first thing to come up mind you! and I see it 20hrs+ and I thought HELL NO these 13-year-old girls r on some mad shit rn I'm not doing all that. So I sat on it for a few days and videos on my fyp kept on coming up and I was in lockdown so I didn't have anything better to do SO FUCK IT. I started reading I'm a hater bro I was trying too hard to be different anyways I get to the bonfire chapter and when y/n goes to Eren and gives him that snore OH SOMETHING HIT ME my feet were in the air giggling like a little kid let me tell you and I was addicted since that day, even dragging y/n feet down in the lake, THE STARGAZING AND THE DONT KISS ME HAUNTING MEEEEE,eren being a stoner and an emo boy is forever in my soul and sorry guys unpopular opinion but the disabled toilet scene was lowkey good like forgot about that goatee hehe…. but when she got SHOT LIKE TWIN I FELT THAT TOO, MY HEART WAS BEATING OUT OF MY CHEST, BREATHING WAS GETTING SHORTER like its real emotions let we tell you. Dont get me started on the way Eren was so caring afterward my man my man knows how to treat a girl right and then the Halloween chapter and which was the latest chapter at the time and this was the one everyone was crying about so I got my tissues knowing I won't be needing them so I'm reading 3 am mind you, boneing sesh, hot, in love, Eren outfit slays, when that door opened to yk I was ready to fight a bitch, like my blood was boiling it was sizzling and I thought my baby going to stick up for this fine ass NO LETs BREAK UP ITS NOT FUN ANYMORE EVERYONE KNOWS YOU JUST LIKE EVERY OTHER GIRL YOU CRY ALL THE TIME HAVE PANIC ATTACKS AND YOU RELY TO MUCH ON ME, the way I'm crying is real THAT SHIT hit so hard it's not even funny like these "dumb bitches" were right THIS IS A REAL BREAKUP like I can't even say how I was feeling cause it was so much, like sleeping that night wasn't an option. But then I managed to get some sleep and I woke up to the most sexy notification of the ages parasite update chapter called Eren's Halloween I WAS SHITTING BRICKS. Anyways what I'm trying to say is that this book has been such a big help to me over the years this is my escape and a place where I can find something different and I just wanted to tell you cause I have been holding this in for three years buddy like I'm in the shadows liking your stories following you on everything but has always been too scared to say anything so here I am saying something and over the last few weeks its been really hard on me, mentally and physically and ik parasite is construction you could say BUT BITCH TAKE YOUR TIME CAUSE, TIMELESS WORK TAKE TIME MWAH back to my point I have been thinking in my head about different scenarios and points in the book to make me feel better and its so weird but I start smiling like its not just the book but the community around it too. So I'm going to wrap this up cause my fingers really hard but please take care of yourself and I hope you r eating good tonight xoxo Your stalker from 2021

this is the funniest thing i’ve ever read & a canon experience i fear