#rip vanessa's ex boyfriend

[icarusredwings]

"... How many did you check?"

"Huh?"

They're on the couch. Wade is playing a game on his phone, his feet pulled up on the couch and is squished between Logan and the side of the couch. Not because he has to be. But because he wants to be.

"Check what?" He mutters, going back to the game. Logan sits there with an empty beer bottle sat between his legs, a rerun of two broke girls playing infront of them, puppins sprawled out on the other cushion in a way that should technically hurt her spine if it wasnt for the fact she could regenerate.

"The other me's."

"Oh.. uh, i dont know. A lot?"

"... so not all of them?" He asks, quiet and refuses to look at Wade, staring mindlessly at the blue light.

"Mmh, guess not. You know the first you was really cute and little. I felt like it was a crime to take him away from there, though. He wouldn't be able to reach the top of the counter here." Wade snickers, thinking this was quite funny, describing it as if taking an animal away from its natural habitat.

"..cute?"

"Well- Yeah. They were all cute. Some more so hot but always cute. He was so little. The widdle guy had to jump off a stool and im shocked he didn't break a leg!" He snorts.

The silence from Logan made him suddenly pause, glancing at him in the corner of his eye. "....why do you ask?"

"I just.. You chose me because I didn't instantly try to kill you right?"

He shrugs. "I guess so? I mean.. I just needed one to say they'll help me... you smiled at me.."

What broke Logan's heart more is that.. he didn't remember that. He didn't remember anything other than telling him he wasn't interested, trying to draw his claws, and then somehow ended up with his clothes changed and on a floor. That whole first day or so was spotty.

"I did..didn't I?" But the question sounds more like he was questioning himself rather then Wade.

By now, He had died in his game, looking at Logan with a concered face. One Logan refused to even acknowledge. He didn't want the last thing he saw be Wade's sad glossy white puppy eyes.

"Yes.. you did. You looked at me like.. you were excited I was going to kill you. And then you grabbed it and chugged a half a bottle in one go.... Is.. something wrong?"

The silence between them got thicker, and thicker, until it felt like Wade couldn't breathe. He swallowed nervously as Logan hesitantly opened his mouth.

"...I wanna go home, Wade.."

"What? But.. heh.. Peanut we... You are home. This is your home." He says, wondering just how drunk he was, but something in his gut told him he wasn't.

"I need to go back to my universe."

His eyes widdened, sitting up as he shoves the phone into the side of the couch. "What!? W-why?? I thought.. you said you would stay. A-and you heard that Tva lady I need a wolverine. I need... you." He states, already feeling the panic setting in.

He shook his head, looking away. "No.. no you don't. Find a different one then. A better one."

This is when the tears began to well. "What are you talking about??" He wasn't dumb. He knew when he was being broken up with, the same exact thing came out of Nathan's mouth. 'I need to go back to my time, Wade. I miss my daughter... and whike you're like my wife.. you aren't.' He had told him. What was it with metal men abandoning him for other places in space and time? Though he wanted Logan to say it. That he didn't want to be together anymore. That he would rather let Wade's world collapse and die then stay with him in this timeline.

"Exactly what I said. You said you didn't check them all. So check the others. Find one better then me. And then when you do, Let me know and Ill leave.." he says, his grip tightening on the bottle.

Everything flips. His heart, his stomach, his mind. Logan wasn't leaving him to die. He was leaving so HE could die. He didn't see what value Wade had in him, that there was clearly a better option.

Its now that Wade's tears are swapped for anger.

"You moron!!" He says, standing up from the couch as he stands in front of him. "How stupid can you possibly be!??"

Now Logan looks at him. "..." he's quiet and confused. This wasn't how he planned this to go..

"I was beaten, bloody, mauled, and you think I would trade them for you!? I picked YOU! You fucking idiot!!" For once it's Wade who growls, frustrated that he even thought hed agree to such a plan.

"But you said.."

"Logan! Stop! Usually im the dumb one but you're making a fool of yourself! Do you really think I'd agree to that!? I'm not going out shopping for a new one when my favorite one is already infront of me!" He yells at him the way Logan did when wade called himself ugly.

"Ho-how do you know if Im your favorite if you haven't seen all of your options?"

"What? Logan im not shopping for a new vacuum!? You're a person! A living breathing person who has his own thoughts and feelings. Thoughts and feelings that drive me up the wall to the point were not allowed to shower together anymore because we make too much noise!!"

Swallowing, the tears in Logans eyes start to fall, staring at him as if genuienly upset from the shouting. It felt weird for Wade to be so pissed off at him... it wasn't right.. felt very wrong actually.

"But that's.. th-thats just sex.."

"OH MY GOD!" he groans, rubbing his face with his hands before clapping them together, leaning down to stare him in those big ocean eyes of his.

"I love you. YOU. This version in particular. The one sitting on my couch right this second. The one that leaves the toilet seat up and who scares away the rats with his snoring! Capiche?! Entiendo? O tengo que golpearte con una zapatilla?!"

Hearing this, Puppin's eyes flung open, immediately jumping off the couch and going to lay in her corner with her pillow, Looking at wade with her tail tucked. Logan could sense the animal's fear, his own neck hairs standing up a bit, feeding off of her scent of sudden obedience and fear.

Staring at him, dumbfound, Logan swallows.

"...S-si?"

"Bueno. You've been taking your lessons. That little green bird will kill you, ya know. And so will Laura if she finds out you lost your streak." Wade warns, knowing damn well he didn't understand half of that.

He nods again, a bit frozen as Wade snatches the bottle from his hands, going to the kitchen to throw it out only to grab him a water. Coming back, He climbed onto his lap.

Putting the water down, he grabs his face, connecting their foreheads. He tries to pull away out of reaction but wade grips his chops.

"I will never, EVER, replace you. Do you understand? Im nerotic and manic remember? If I wanted another wolverine id find one. But I don't. I want you. As yourself. Sorry kitten, but from the second you smiled at me in that van, I done decided you're never getting rid of me without killing me first. So deal with it. Now hold me, kiss me, and tell me that you don't want to leave." He demands, pulling the mans hands to his hips and waist.

Swallowing again, his arms tighten around him, pulling him close. Kissing him, Wade wraps his arms around his neck, being sure to give him a good one.

Pulling away, Logan opens his mouth. "But.. what if-"

So wade kisses him again.

"Wade I-"

And again.

"...."

"You done?"

"...are you su-?"

And again...

"If the next words out of your mouth isn't 'I love you' I'm going to get Al's slipper." He threatens.

This is the moment when he finally understands. Wade could have easily picked whichever one he wanted up and threw it through a portal to the Tva. The tva could have forced whichever Logan to stay in wades universe. No, he probably wouldn't have been on this couch, but he could have chosen any of them, and yet he chose him. Chose to bring him back to this dingy apartment, introduced him to his mother figure of a coke addict grandma, and fed him. Held him. Taught him about things his world didn't have, accept him as he is, love him for him.

He's already decided that he would be loyal to this Wade until he didn't want him anymore. It was his duty. A scuffy stinky sad man, all alone, given a home, a bath, food, and well- the best sex he had in years, but that was besides the point.

Wade chose him. Like picking up a stray dog and making him part of the family (which.. he also did with Puppins)

Logan didn't understand how Wade had such a big heart when given so much damage but he knew one thing. Wade was doing his part. And he said he wasnt getting rid of him either.

Well guess what Wade Wilson? Consider your freaky ways of affection matched because it was here and now that Logan decided to protect him until his last breath. From evil mental or physical, from pain that came from within or from the hand of another, from loneliness, himself, and all of time that wished to tear him away from him.

Logan had the claws to hold on, and Wade had the hips that couldn't be wounded from the grip. He was known to always catch his prey. To hold on and not let go for anything.

Well then lets fucking go. Try us, Universe. Because this is his Wade. With his scent, his shirt on, and in HIS lap. And he'd be damned if he let anyone take it from him a second time.

"I love you." He says, genuine.

The man smiles, caressing his cheek. "I love you too. MY wolvie." Another peck before reaching over for his phone in the cough, staying on his lap as he played it behind his head.

"Besides. I wouldn't let anyone take you away from me anyway. I'd put 50 new holes in'em and shove my boot up every one. Just as Vanessa's ex boyfriend. Ha!! Oh... that was fun.." he muttered, letting him hold him for as long as he needed.

Logan smirked, shaking his head with a huff from his nose. Yeah.. this little freak was his. Get your own. And he'd vow to stay with him until the end of time ... eventually.. when ever he got the balls to pop THAT question..

A blush comes onto his face as he catches himself with the idea. "....Shit."

Thinking about Worst Wolvie getting insecure and asking wade if he's still going to love him when he's so old that his beard is overgrown, pure white, and he can't get it up anymore only for wade to tell him that he was willing to choke on old man Logan's wrinkly balls but he told him to get off his property by uhh blowing a double shot gun into his stomach before he could even ask. "But that's still pretty hot, right? Metaphoric, in a way. Like he wanted to pump 2 loads in me but couldn't. Ha!! Oh I know what were doing tonight!"

Logan just sits here for a second, blinking. "Wait you what??"

"Tonight were gonna-"

"No.. the other thing. Old man me??"

"Yeah, when I was looking for you, almost all of the other yous beat the shit out of me. And then I got beat up by the Hulk, and then there was this really weird one where everyone was dead, and it was raining bl-"

"He shot you?"

"Huh? That's the part you're struggling with? Well, yeah. There was this nice little cabin and a dog on the porch. The second I put my foot on the porch, he shot me."

"But you said... that you'd still like him?"

Wade blinks now too, confused as to why Logan wasnt getiting the concept that he'd fuck any of hims as long as it was still him.

"Honey badger, are you blind or did you hit your head on the way home? Of course I'd fuck that old geezer!! Until his adanatium hips broke!"

"U-until his hips broke??"

Wade smiles and boops him in the nose. "Till. His. Hips. Broke. Shattered. Kablooey! So to awnser your question, Yes ill still like you even when you get wrinkly old man dick."

"Oh.."

He leaves this interaction not knowing if he feels better about the situation or not- Knowing that Wade would fuck him limp dicked and all until he couldn't anymore was nice but the fact he said it like this made him wonder if he'd choose him in a room full of variants... no.. probably not. He was the worst wolverine. Bottom of the barrel.

Though... He'd chose this Wade out of a hoard of deadpool variants. He did already once, but he would. Everytime. And he'd find him too because this Wade smelled like him. Claimed with scent. And if any others wanted to reclaim him, they'd have to fight him for it.

[keanureevesisbae]

Mister Cavill, your dog is kinda fat - Chapter 13

Summary: Veterinarian Olivia Tran has zero time for bullshit. After becoming a mom at age twenty three, the one thing she wants is a good life for her daughter Vanessa. Her ex didn’t want anything to do with her nor the baby and she decided that man are officially banned out of her life. But then she meets Henry Cavill at her clinic and her ban slowly starts to crumble apart. Henry on the other hand is looking for one thing: a family. And when he meets Olivia Tran, he finds just that.

Henry Cavill x Olivia Tran (ofc)

Warnings: Some smutty thoughts of Olivia, but that’s about it.

Wordcount: 5k 

Masterlist // Previous chapter // Next chapter 

I think I should thank the universe that my daughter is here, because otherwise I would’ve murdered Wesley right now, after throwing my hot chocolate in his face. After seven plus years of not seeing him and resisting the urge of not going online to check what he is up to nowadays, looking at him in real life sure brings back a whole lot of emotions. He is basically the same, only he lost a bit of weight, especially around his face.

I don’t think he looks necessarily good and maybe it’s his conscious eating him alive inside.

Just as he deserves. Motherfucker.

I see him looking at my daughter and Vanessa has no problem staring back at him. She has a frown between her brows and I know she is thinking about all the questions she can ask the man that left her before she was even born. The man that didn’t want her, before he even got to know her.

I stand up from the table and grab his arm, dragging him away from the table. Dragging him away from my family. ‘What the hell do you think you’re doing?’

‘She looks an awful lot like you,’ he notes. ‘What’s her name?’

‘What the fuck is that suppose to mean?’ I ask him. He wants to look over his shoulder again, right at my daughter but my mom reflexes and mom voice are no joke. ‘Wesley, don’t you dare look at her. Look at me.’

He does what I ask him to do. ‘Who is that man?’

It’s beyond me where Wesley has got the nerves to answer my questions with his own questions, but after having Vanessa, I’m able to play along just fine. ‘What are you doing here?’ I ask him. ‘Why do you all of the sudden care about her? You certainly didn’t give a shit when I was pregnant with her.’

‘I’m a changed man, Livi.’

That nickname brings me back to a time where I was so in love with him. A time where I knew I would marry this man, but after spending a few months with Henry, I realized that it was a blessing that he broke up with me. He treated me okay, but never in the way Henry does.

‘It’s Olivia for you,’ I tell him, ‘and you honestly want me to believe that you are a changed man?’ I can’t help but laugh out of pity. ‘Well, you are quite something, Wesley, I have to give you that.’

‘I’m serious,’ he says and he actually looks like he means it. He gestures to his right, my left and when I follow where he is pointing towards, I see a woman sitting, who stares at me with daggers. She places her hand protectively on her pregnant belly and right next to her, I see a young boy sitting, who actually looks pretty cute. ‘That’s Ria,’ he says, ‘and our son Kevin.’

Our son Kevin? I don’t see Wesley for the type of saint that would adopt someone else’s kid (I mean, he is no Henry and no matter what kind of changed man he is, he’ll never reach that level of maturity), so I clear my throat, before I ask: ‘How old is Kevin?’

‘He is six.’

Wesley could’ve stabbed me in my stomach and that wouldn’t have hurt or shocked me, as I am now. ‘He is six?’ I ask him, trying so hard not to raise my voice. ‘You knocked someone up right after you left me?’

Wesley doesn’t say a word.

‘Oh my God,’ I say in utter disbelieve, running my fingers through my hair. ‘You are un-fucking-believable. You left me, let me figure this whole parenting thing out all on my own, while you start a family? Wesley, what the fuck is wrong with you? I can’t believe this. You leave me, my whole family leaves me, because I got pregnant. Have you any idea in what kind of fucking situation you put me through?’

‘I want to get to know her.’

It’s admirable that Wesley has some guts, I have to give him that. ‘No,’ I chuckle. ‘You fucking can’t. You walked out of both of our lives when I gave you the chance to be a dad. You can’t just barge in, because you saw us sitting there. You and your precious new family stay out of our lives and I’ll gladly stay out of yours.’

I want to walk past him, right back to my table, but he grabs my arm. ‘Wait,’ he says and for some weird reason I do wait. ‘Here is my number.’ He hands me a card and I can’t help but stare at this.

‘Since when are you the type of person that has a card?’ I ask, grabbing it out of his hand. ‘Oh look at that. You somehow finished college and you’re a real estate agent now. I’ll be damned.’ I almost want to rip the card apart, but I know that my daughter is looking at me, so I can’t act stupid now.

‘Please, if you change your mind, let me know. I want to make up for the years I wasn’t there for you two.’

I don’t even look at him, I can’t even look at him, so I walk back to my table. ‘We’re leaving,’ I say to Vanessa and Henry. Vanessa wants to look at Wesley, but I block her view. ‘Don’t look at him,’ I tell her and nearly drag her with me outside. Vanessa doesn’t say anything, nor does Henry.

I help her in her carseat and the first five minutes of our drive go by in complete silence. ‘Mommy,’ Vanessa finally says and I admire her for having the balls to open her mouth. ‘Was that my real dad?’

‘He is your biological dad, yes.’

‘What does that mean?’

‘When two people make a baby, you have a bit of both in you. So, Henry and all his brothers have a bit of both Marianne and Colin in them.’

Vanessa mhms. ‘Why were you mad at him?’

‘Because he wants to be part of your life.’

‘Oh.’

It’s quiet for a few seconds, before I finally snap again. ‘That idiot honestly thought that he could just barge right back into my life, after everything he didn’t do for me?’ I ask myself out loud. ‘That bastard had the guts, the guts, to hand me over his card, so I could call him if we change our minds about it. Did you know he has a new lady, who is pregnant and already gave birth to a kid of him? That kid is six. Six! While I’m struggling with my job, with my new baby all by myself, he is out there, impregnating this other woman…’

‘Mommy, what is impregnating?’

‘… having kids with her and being a loyal loving family man. What the hell is wrong with him? Now I finally,  finally have the life that I wanted for both myself and Vanessa and he has the nerves to just walk into my life again? Thinking he can do that? Why are men such big fat pigs? Who has the audacity to look around in a restaurant, see his ex girlfriend with her daughter and obviously her new boyfriend and just walk up to them to ask: ‘Is this her?’. Like he knows Vanessa. Like he was there for her when she was just born!’

I let out a frustrated breath, as I cross my arms and stare out of the window. Henry gently places his hand on my thigh and lean my head back against the head rest of the seat.

‘Mommy, his new kid,’ Vanessa says, ‘does he have a part of that man in him?’

‘Yes, he does, so technically he is your half brother and the child inside the belly of the other woman is your half sister or another half brother.’ I look at Henry and say softly: ‘If that woman didn’t stray of course.’

Henry doesn’t say anything and the rest of the car ride continues in silence. This is crazy, I think to myself. That Wesley left my subconscious a long time ago and now he is all my entire family can think about.

When we’re back inside our house, I keep pacing around the living room, while Henry and Vanessa plop on the couch, carefully watching my moves.

‘Mom, can I meet him?’

I nearly collapse. ‘Excuse me, what?’ I ask, in a lot harsher tone than I usually talk to her, even when I’m angry with her. ‘Why on earth would you want to meet him?’

‘Olivia,’ Henry says, shaking his head, telling me non verbally that I need to tone it down a notch.

‘Because… I want to get to know him.’

I sigh deeply. ‘Sweetheart, he left you, before you were born. I think that is all you need to know about him. Besides, you have a great dad now.’

She nods. ‘I know, but I want to ask him something.’

‘What do you wanna ask him?’

‘Why he left.’

Oh my God, I’m going to cry and never stop. She wants to ask him that question, that is too pure and too sweet and it makes me want to kill Wesley even more. She looks so vulnerable.

‘Oh,’ I say. Who am I to stop her from doing this? Whether I like it or not, that man, that lousy piece of shit, is still her biological father. If she wants to see him, to get to know him, why should I stop her? Simply because I have personal vendetta against him, hate his guts and wouldn’t cry a single moment if he accidentally got under a bus? ‘On one condition,’ I tell her. ‘I am there every single second.’

Vanessa nods. ‘I want Henry there too.’ She looks up at him and says: ‘But only if you want to, of course.’

My daughter is so considerate and I love her for that. God, I did such a good job with raising her by myself. Where is the standing ovation I deserve?

‘I want to,’ Henry says. ‘For you I’d do anything. Maybe you should hug your mom. She looks like she needs it.’

Vanessa jumps off the couch and walks up to me. ‘I love you, mommy,’ she says.

‘Oh, sweetheart, I love you too. I’m sorry I was so hard on you.’

She shakes her head. ‘I get it, you are really angry. You really don’t like what he did, because you never got this mad at me.’

I chuckle. ‘No, that’s true. I’ll send him a text.’

≫≫≪≪

So tomorrow we are going to meet up with Wesley at a cafe. I chose a public place, because otherwise I’m tempted to kill him if we are somewhere more private. After I called Belle and vented for a good half an hour before I let her speak, she told me I was doing the right and mature thing. She also told me that after we met up, we should hang out, so we can talk about this, because it would probably be better for my blood pressure to immediately talk about the meeting.

And all of the sudden I’m in desperate need for some motherly advice, but counting on my own mother is out of the window. So with Vanessa and Henry we go to the Cavill residence and thankfully Charlie is there, so he and Colin can take Vanessa with them, to play some stupid games, walk around the house, while I can have a heart to heart talk with Marianne, Henry close by.

I haven’t spoken to him really since Vanessa asked me to see her biological father. The only thing he did was giving me tight hugs so I would stop pacing, give me a kiss every now and then and simply whisper that I was doing the right thing.

Sitting at the kitchen table, Henry right next to me and Marianne across from me, is weirdly calming. ‘You are doing the right thing,’ Marianne also says. ‘So, your friend Belle and Henry are right.’

I place my elbows on the hard surface, before I bury my face in my hands. ‘It was my grand idea to have some hot chocolate afterwards,’ I mumble. ‘Hadn’t I done that, we wouldn’t have run into him.’

‘Maybe we were suppose to run into him,’ Henry says, placing his arm around my shoulders. ‘Sweetheart, whether you like it or not, he is Vanessa’s real dad. She deserves to get to know him.’

‘But what if she likes him more?’ I ask and I realize that was my fear all along. ‘I tried so hard for her and what if she meets him and thinks: oh, that man, I like him a lot more than I like my mom and the entire family she gave me.’

‘No, no, no,’ Henry says, ‘you know that is not going to happen. Because of your honesty to her all these previous years, she is well aware of what he did to both you and her. It’s always her biggest fear that I’m leaving after she did something that she shouldn’t do. I think she just wants some answers, so she can think about it.’

‘You raised a smart and intelligent girl, Olivia,’ Marianne says. ‘So I have an idea. Tomorrow the three of you go straight to us, you bring your friend Belle along too and we can have a nice long talk, to process this. It’s scary, my dear, I know that, but it’s nothing you can’t handle. You are a whole lot tougher than you think you are.’

I let out a sigh. ‘Yeah, you are right.’

Marianne asks me if I want some more tea and I think I want to. While she walks off to the kitchen, Henry presses a kiss on my temple. ‘How are you, love?’ he asks.

‘When we’re home, I think I’m going to take a long hot shower. You mind?’

‘Of course not,’ he says. ‘Vanessa and I can start on dinner, how about that?’ Henry has a smile on his face when he sees me nod. ‘I am proud of you.’ He leans in and gives me a long kiss. ‘I’m so happy that I can get to call you my girlfriend.’

‘You’re not scared?’

He nods. ‘I am, very much so, but I also have a lot of faith in your daughter.’

‘Our daughter,’ I correct him.

Henry blushes a bit and I pull him into a hug. I bury my face in his neck and let out a content sigh, for the first time in a few hours. ‘I love you,’ he whispers.

‘I love you too, Henry,’ I say. ‘And I trust our daughter too. Just promise me that if I have to go to the clinic, or to the bathroom, you keep an eye on them. Don’t leave him with her for a single second, okay?’

‘I was going to ask you the same thing too,’ he chuckles. ‘We’ll be alright, darling. I guarantee.’

≫≫≪≪

I’m surprised Wesley is early. He was always late when we dated. Maybe he did change, a little bit. Before we walk into the cafe, I stop Vanessa in her tracks and I say: ‘You can ask him anything you want. If there is something he says that you don’t like, you can tell him that. If you want to leave, you can just ask me or Henry and we’ll leave right away. Remember, you don’t owe him anything.’

Vanessa nods. ‘I know, mommy, you told five times already this morning.’

‘Don’t be a smart ass now,’ I say to her.

Henry places his heavy hands on her shoulders and says: ‘You have to cut your mom some slack, she doesn’t mean it like that. She is just still a bit mad.’

Vanessa chuckles. ‘I know. Mommy, it will all be fine. You are here, daddy is here.’

‘I’m sorry, you’re right.’ I give her a big kiss and say: ‘You are a good kid.’

The three of us walk into the cafe and Wesley stands up from his spot. Vanessa walks over to him and holds out her hand. ‘Hello,’ she says, ‘my name is Vanessa.’

Wesley takes her hand in his, while he keeps standing up. I don’t want to compare (but I’m still gonna), but all the insanely tall Cavills crouch down when they talk to her. ‘Hi Vanessa, I’m Wesley.’

‘I know who you are, my mommy told me all about you.’

You go, girl. I’m so proud of her already and I can’t believe that my daughter is handling this situation a whole lot better than I am.

Wesley nods and looks at Henry. ‘Aren’t you the actor?’ he asks. ‘Henry Cavill?’

‘I certainly am,’ Henry says, shaking my ex boyfriends hand.

We all sit down, order something to drink. While I am in the desperate mood for some vodka, I decide to go with a cappuccino, just to be safe. I ordered Henry not to break the silence, because Wesley wanted to meet Vanessa so badly, so he should keep up the conversation.

Vanessa takes a sip of her apple juice and looks at Wesley. ‘Can I ask you a question?’

I think Wesley is grateful that she decided to break the silence, because he nods. ‘Of course.’

‘Why did you leave my mommy?’

‘Because I was scared,’ he says. ‘I thought I wasn’t ready to be a dad yet.’

There is so much I want to say to him. You think I was ready to become a mother? You think I wasn’t scared?

Vanessa sighs and I see her bottom lip tremble. God, this is too much for me to handle and I want to jump up, hoist her up in my arms and while I walk out of this cafe, punch Wesley right in the nose. ‘Why didn’t you want to love me?’

I look at Henry, who places a comforting hand on my leg. It might be uncomfortable now, but I know that this will be good for Vanessa and for me for that matter.

Wesley doesn’t know what to say.

‘Am I that unloveable?’ she continues to ask.

Now I can’t keep my mouth shut, because now she is doubting herself and as a mother I can’t let that happen. ‘No,’ I say to her. ‘You are not unloveable, don’t you ever think like that again.’

Vanessa frowns. ‘But he didn’t love me.’

‘He didn’t even want to love you. He didn’t even try,’ I say, not caring he is there and can totally hear this. ‘Remember sweetheart, he walked out on you and me, not the other way around.’

‘I was scared,’ Wesley tells me.

‘Don’t you think I was?’ I ask him, absolutely dumbfounded. I turn to Vanessa again and ask her: ‘Remember what I always tell you? About fear?’

She nods. ‘That you are allowed to be scared, but that it should never stop you in life.’

‘That’s right. But sweetheart, you were talking to Wesley, I’m sorry I interrupted.’

Vanessa shakes her head. ‘That’s okay, mommy. You can always interrupt me.’

Suck that up, Wesley, I think to myself. My daughter is fucking polite and I did that all by myself.

‘You know,’ Vanessa continues, ‘I always wondered why I didn’t have a dad. Kids in my class have one and I wanted one too.’

‘I understand,’ Wesley says, though he grows more uncomfortable with the second. I bet he underestimated my daughter and her communication skills and now he should deal with the consequences of that easy thinking of his.

‘And then my mommy met Henry,’ she says with a beaming smile. ‘He is a real daddy, you know. He bought me my first bike, my first Christmas tree and he took my out on a Valentines date two days ago.’

Yes, honey, please rub it in.

Wesley takes a sip of his coffee and he actually is trying to leave, I can totally see it in his body language. ‘Where do you think you’re going?’ Henry asks, picking up on those signs as well. ‘You sit down now. Vanessa is talking to you and you better listen to it.’

This isn’t the moment to think about hot and passionate sex with Henry, but tomorrow I’m off work a little bit earlier than usual and you bet your ass I’m going to spoil him in a whole lot of nasty ways before we have to pick Vanessa up.

‘Please, Vanessa, continue,’ Henry says to her with a loving smile.

Vanessa nods. ‘He is going to adopt me soon,’ she continues, eyes shining bright with excitement. ‘And then we are officially a family.’

‘Right.’

‘My mommy cried a lot because of you. She didn’t know I saw her, but usually at night she would cry on the couch. I heard her talking to my auntie Belle about you and that I don’t have a daddy. That’s your fault.’

Henry and I exchange glances and he seems to be impressed by our daughter.

‘Vanessa,’ Wesley says, ‘I don’t want to have this conversation with you.’

She seems a bit shocked. ‘Why not?’ she asks.

‘Yeah, Wesley, why not?’ I ask him, crossing my arms in front of my chest. ‘Tell her why not.’

‘This is a grown up conversation.’

‘No, it’s not,’ I retort. ‘It’s about her, so she should have a conversation with you and if you are intimidated by a seven year old, then you are really even less of a man than I figured you were.’

Henry clears his throat. ‘You keep your ass on that chair and if you don’t do that, I have no problems at all forcing you onto that seat. You listen to Vanessa and you have a conversation with her. Right here and right now.’

Wesley is getting more and more frustrated right now, but I’m not cutting him slack. No, he wanted this. He ruined my perfect day by forcing himself basically into our lives.

‘So, you have a son and almost a new baby, right?’ Vanessa asks.

‘Mhm.’

‘Do you love them?’

‘I do,’ Wesley says.

She thinks about her next move long and hard. ‘Cool.’ Vanessa simply stares at him and even tilts her head. ‘I don’t like you.’

My mouth falls open and I can’t help but feel so proud of her.

‘Excuse me, what?’ Wesley asks.

‘I don’t like you,’ she repeats, rolling her eyes and I can almost hear her thinking: Are you deaf? ‘You made me sad, because you walked out before I was born. You made my mommy sad and very angry yesterday and I don’t like it when that happens. I am happy that I saw you, because now I know that you… Mommy, can I say this?’

‘Go for it.’

‘Now I know that you really are an idiot.’ She looks at Henry. ‘Right, daddy?’

Henry nods. ‘You’re totally right, sunshine.’

‘You allow this?’ Wesley asks me. ‘You allow this kind of talk?’

‘I didn’t know you had the right to give an opinion about my parenting skills,’ I say to him.

‘I wanted a second chance, but with what you are telling her about me…’

‘Is the truth, buddy,’ Henry says. ‘What did you think would happen? That they waited seven years for you to come back? Of course not. You left them and Olivia made the brave choice of raising her daughter with the upmost honesty and respect, something that you obviously lack.’

‘And you think you can just barge into their lives and be the savior?’ Wesley retorts.

‘Excuse me?’ Henry asks. ‘I’ve been acting more like a dad to Vanessa in one day than you have been your entire life. I think you should be grateful that I swooped in and give her the dad she deserves to have.’

‘Wesley,’ Vanessa says and he looks at her. ‘I hope you love your new kids, because they deserve a dad.’

That’s more maturity than I could ever have. Did I raise this girl?

‘I have to go,’ Wesley says.

‘No, you’re not. I didn’t hear Vanessa was finished,’ Henry says, clearly getting more and more frustrated with Wesley. ‘Sunshine, you finished?’

‘Almost.’

‘Listen to the young lady,’ Henry says, his eyes not leaving Wesley once.

Vanessa clears her throat and says: ‘I don’t want to see you ever again.’

‘Well, make two of that, sweetheart,’ I say.

‘Three,’ Henry mumbles.

‘Now you can go. I finished my apple juice.’

Wesley looks at me, jaw clenched and ready to murder me. Honestly, I don’t even blame him. If I were a coward and in his shoes, I’d kill me too.

‘You know, sweetheart, we’ll go instead,’ I say to her. I get up from the chair and say to Wesley: ‘I bet you wished you didn’t walk up to us now, didn’t you?’

I grab Vanessa’s hand and with Henry we walk outside of the cafe. The second we are outside, I lift her up in my arms. ‘I am so proud of you, baby.’ I press tons of kisses on her faces, causing her to squeal. ‘You are the biggest bad ass I’ve ever met in my entire life!’

Vanessa hugs me tightly. ‘I’m happy he left you, mommy.’

‘That was the biggest blessing ever.’

Henry gives Vanessa a kiss on her cheek and says: ‘I’m so proud of you, sunshine. He is indeed a big idiot.’

The door of the cafe opens. ‘What the fuck was that?’ Wesley fumes.

‘Language,’ I tell him sternly, like it’s going to work. The word ‘fuck’ slipped my lips multiple times and thankfully Vanessa understands she can never repeat that word.

For now, at least. When she is a teenager, I sure hope she starts to use it then.

‘You totally set this kid up,’ he continues. ‘Talking bad about me behind my back.’

‘Well, I would’ve talked bad about you right in your face, but you walked out of my life, remember?’

I feel like Wesley is about to attack me, but Henry steps in between us. ‘I would suggest you leave. Vanessa told you she doesn’t want to see you anymore and I think you should respect that. We have your number and will call you if she changes her mind.’

‘And you,’ he spits, ‘you honestly think you can waltz into their lives?’

‘I do, actually and I did waltz into their lives. Turned out to be amazing. Honestly, Wesley, you don’t know what you’re missing. Vanessa is such a bright and intelligent and well spoken girl and Olivia is fascinating on her own and an amazing mother.’

Wesley doesn’t have any control over himself anymore, because he launches forward, planning on hitting Henry, who doesn’t seem impressed one single second. Henry grabs my lousy ex boyfriend by his collar and pushes him against the wall. ‘What was that?’ he asks unbothered.

God, he is sexy and this is totally doing things to my panties right now.

‘Let go of me.’

‘Only if you promise us you stay out of our lives and we never see you again, unless we had some sort of aneurism and weirdly enough want to see you.’

‘Fuck you.’

‘Language,’ Vanessa and I yell at the same time.

Henry chuckles. ‘It’s very simple. Just say you promise and I’ll let you go.’

Wesley clenches his jaw. ‘I promise.’

‘Easy, wasn’t it?’ I could’ve known that Henry wasn’t going to just let him go. He throws Wesley to the ground and says: ‘You big piece of shit.’

‘Mister Cavill,’ I say with a smile when he walks up to us again. ‘That was quite something.’

He gives me a long kiss and despite the desperation I can feel, he is holding himself in not to slip his tongue inside my mouth. ‘I love you, darling,’ he mumbles against my mouth. ‘And I sure hope that we never see this idiot ever again.’

‘I think you took care of that.’ I look at Wesley, who pushes himself up and walks away, without looking over his shoulder once.

‘You are truly Superman, daddy,’ Vanessa says with a smile. ‘We are really tough, aren’t we?’

‘We are, sunshine.’ He presses a kiss on her cheek. ‘We promised grandma Marianne we would go to her after meeting Wesley. How about we bring something sweet to her place?’

‘Like what?’ Vanessa asks.

‘I was thinking some cake, you agree?’

‘Yes, I agree!’

≫≫≪≪

The Cavill and Tran family groupchat

Piers: I already told you guys, but I am proud that you told that idiot off and please tell me what Vanessa wants. I want to buy her a present for being such a total bad ass.

Charlie: I swear, if I ever run into him, I’m going to throw him accidentally in front of the bus. What a fucking idiot.

Mom: Charlie!

Charlie: What? You said the exact same thing!

Mom: But with you, I never know if you mean it. I don’t want any of my kids in jail, even if I agree with your actions.

Dad: I’ll do it then. I’m old anyways. I have nothing to lose.

Mom: Colin!

Niki: Yeah, you go dad. You go throw that fucking moron in front of the bus.

Henry: I support you, dad.

Olivia: Not to be that kind of person, but I’d rather you spend time with Vanessa than in jail. Please leave the idiot alone.

Mom: Finally some common sense in this group chat. I’m glad we added you, Olivia, because it can be hard being a woman alone with these guys.

Dad: So I can’t throw him in front of the bus?

Olivia: No, I’m sorry. I can tell you this though: resisting the urge to kill him, will get easier over time.

Henry: I hope you are right, love.

Simon: Not to be that guy, but Olivia, can you give me Belle’s number?

[valleykarate]

if robby wants to avoid this part of reseda for as long as he lives, johnny genuinely wouldn't blame him in the slightest. his son just went through something severely traumatizing as finding his ex-friend... wait, correction: current boyfriend, bleeding to death on this very fucking floor. are they putting labels on that relationship? he’d read on the googles that sometimes people call their boyfriends or girlfriends partners ( maybe he should ask wade or vanessa about that later. ) ethan’d barely tried dragging himself away before giving up, resigning himself to his slow agonizing death. he thinks, a little hysteric.

sudden tears sting in his eyes. he forces them away before robby can see them. he can’t start fucking crying right now. he needs to be there for robby. his son comes first. he hasn't been there for him in the past. he needs to be there for him now, especially because of everything.

but if robby hadn’t been at the dojo… wade & vanessa would be burying their son right now. dami & talia would be burying their brother. miguel, seth, hawk, chase, gray, emma, courtney & sam—everyone—would have lost their friend. & robby… jesus christ. where the fuck would ethan’s death have led him? down some kind of darker path no one would be able to pull him out of, no doubt. johnny hates thinking about it. it makes him both hysterical & nauseous.

speaking of you, he had seen stopped by to see you one final time before the all valley, clad in his eagle fang gi. you were alone in your room, staring out the window. you’d jumped when he’d entered, heart rate monitor beeping loudly. you had been crying, knees drawn up to your chest, alone with nothing but your spiraling thoughts to keep you company. but when johnny had entered, you’d put on a small smile. he knew it was bullshit because you still had tears in your eyes, the barest hint of being strained. he didn’t ask how you were because that would have been stupid—clearly, you’re not fine, as he’d witnessed, & as you tried to hide from him. the doctors said you’d died twice—it was a fucking miracle of god you were resuscitated the first time, or wasn’t completely dead on arrival, unable to be revived.

johnny hadn’t fully realized how beaten down robby looked until he’d seen him at your bedside, the overwhelming weight of cobra kai & all that other shit probably crushing him into the ground—

surely, the guilt had to be eating him alive.

when robby’d confronted johnny at his apartment, he was caught completely off guard. he should have tried harder, done more to convince robby to leave that fucking toxic dojo, surrounded by a hardened philosophy that rips someone apart, ruins them, turns them into something they’re not. he’d gone through it himself when he’d joined cobra kai, became kreese’s top student. he’d seen it with miguel. almost everyone had; ethan’s friend ciro had somehow miraculously stayed the same. he hadn’t been ‘corrupted’. not like miguel had been, not like robby is. …was? johnny & wade had talked about robby a little bit, when wade wasn't consumed with trying to keep his son breathing—wade nor johnny are religious men, god the furthest thing from tangible or reachable in both of their minds, but wade saw how clearly robby’s betrayal had affected ethan. at different points in the last few months, both had silently prayed to some higher power in the universe that robby would leave cobra kai behind.

the universe, of course, didn't grant that wish. if there is a god out there somewhere, he doesn't give a shit about them. bobby would beg to differ, but if god was real, none of this shit would have happened.

neither of them anticipated the karate war would eventually lead to ethan’s blood on the carpet, though.

fucking silver.

he grimaces when robby approaches the doorway, clearly trying to get in, in spite of johnny trying to prevent looking into the room. he shouldn't need to see the blood for the second time. if robby shoved him to get in, or if he'd punched him, johnny wouldn’t be happy, but he also wouldn’t hit him back. he'd learned his lesson from last time... & he remembers the last time they'd been here. I CAN'T BE MY OWN WORST ENEMY ANYMORE. BUT YOU CAN BE. / SENSEI KREESE IS RIGHT: YOU ARE WEAK. those words are seared into johnny's mind. he sometimes finds himself thinking about them in quiet moments, replaying the fight over & over in his head. he shouldn't have...

the last thing robby needs is to get hurt if he pushed him back & have another reason to hate him, even if it’s valid. not to mention: the last thing johnny would ever want to do is be the one to hurt robby... AGAIN. he’s also not looking for another reason to have ethan blow up at him. he's already done that twice. johnny's pretty sure that he'd do it as many times as he wants to, as long as he feels the need to.

it takes everything in johnny to keep his eyes on robby's bloodshot eyes rather than flickering up to the scar on his forehead, barely visible in the shadows of the room.

if he ever hurt robby again, he's sure ethan would kill him. no mincing words, no amount of sugarcoating would make that any better.

that boy has one of the most potent overprotective streaks johnny's ever witnessed in a human being, ever, & he's pretty sure he's only gleamed, like, Level One of it. Level Ten or whatever level is the cap might actually end in his death ( actually, fucking Level Three could probably wind up killing him, yikes ). he's pretty sure ethan wanted to genuinely kill him once johnny, in a drunken stupor that he can barely recall even now, told him about the fight against kreese & robby in the dojo. after that, ethan didn't speak to him for a few days. johnny missed that more than he'd like to admit, because he grew to be like a son to him. for him to ice him out like that hurt even if it was deserved.

he can't help but feel about a hundred times worse than he already does when he hears robby say it's okay. he inhales sharply, shaking his head gently.

❝ it’s not. i know it's not, robby. ❞ his tone is rough, full of remorse, full of guilt that's so viscerally bone-deep it feels like a weight around his ankle. the fact that robby feels the need to reassure johnny almost brings johnny to his knees. jesus christ. he shouldn't have bore witness to any of that. ethan shouldn't have had to go through that. they're just kids. this karate war has gotten so far out of hand. it'd already gotten out of hand with miguel's accident, but this... this feels like hell.

that guilt will stay with johnny for the rest of his life.

he swallows thickly, visibly wincing at robby's next words.

❝ he's alive. ❞ he reminds him gently. he avoids the use of the word okay. they both know he's not—everyone does, & no one can or should ever blame ethan for that. ❝ he's alive because of you. you saved ethan's life, robby. ❞ the words are meant to comfort him, but johnny's not the best at the whole comforting someone thing. let him go for three rounds on a mat & he's good, but he's probably a little out of his element here. larusso, vanessa & lucienne are all better at comforting someone than johnny is. but he's trying, though. he really is, & really, that's all he can do.

the mention of the kid briefly piques his interest, & he puts two & two together. he'd seen him talking to a younger kid before the fight at the all valley. prior to that, seth had mentioned a new kid joining in cobra kai, following tory & robby around like a baby duckling. cal or kenny or something like that. he doesn't really understand, but he also does. that was cobra kai's teachings & kreese & silver twisting him. he doesn't understand the logic behind robby screwing around with that kid that he'd been friendly towards just minutes prior. or maybe he just hadn't expected robby to go that far. he wanted his son to be better than he was. that's all a parent can hope for, for their children to be better than they were growing up. he'd like to try, to learn more about that situation, about robby's mentee before cobra kai. maybe another time, though. this isn't really the time for that chat, & this bloodstained dojo is certainly not the place. he noticed the shakiness of robby's voice. he'd seen ethan have a panic attack before, had watched wade calm him down. maybe he could try something similar to that.

❝ that kid... that's not on you, either. that's exactly what kreee's cobra kai does to people. i thought i could change it, reinvent it for the better. i... i was wrong. ❞ so, so very fucking wrong. johnny's filled to the brim with regret over that. over every-fucking-thing. ❝ i was the one who invited kreese back into cobra kai. i thought kreese could change, too. he undermined me, took the dojo over, turned it into the living goddamned nightmare it is today, along with that piece of shit, silver. ❞ he doesn't know much about the other man, but he does know he killed ethan. that's a solid reason for johnny to loathe him for as long as he lives.

...regret, guilt, sorrow, worry, rage. these are all emotions johnny has been familiar with all his life.

he thinks back to robby's time with daniel in miyagi-do, or what he gathered from it at least. he'd seen & heard about his son & nephew being happy with sam, demetri & ethan. & eventually, wade & vanessa, & all of his other friends he made, too. he sighs softly.

❝ you had a good thing going with larusso. wade, vanessa & olen, too. sam, chase, seth, emma, your other friends. ❞ he inhales deeply, pausing to collect himself for a moment. ❝ ...ethan. ❞ he adds, his tone gentle, like he's worried saying ethan's name will only cut robby to the bone. ❝ i got in the way of that. ❞

here's the thing: he did, & he knows he did. he's trying to own up to his mistakes that have been haunting him, finally give apologies that have been years in the making. there's seventeen years worth of mistakes with his son & his daughter. johnny's known that he's been a source of rage & pain for robby all his life. his shortcomings as a person & failures as a father is part of the reason, if not the main reason in a long list of reasons why robby joined cobra kai in the first place. that burden, the blame? it rests on johnny's shoulders.

❝ don't blame yourself, ❞ he urges, blue eyes not moving away from robby's green ones, so, so much like his mother's hazel. ❝ blame me. ❞ it's taken him a really fucking long time to realize it, but now he can handle that rage, he recognizes it. in all honesty, he's expecting robby to blame him, like he's always done. it's not that he thinks he shouldn't—it's the actually the exact opposite. he deserves it.

[emlovewrites]

My Hero Part 1 - Spinner x Reader

Gah I’m not sure how I’m feeling about this one, but I have to put something out for once. Sorry if it’s not really up to snuff.

Type: Fluff, SFW

Warnings: arm grabbing, threats of violence, hints to sexual abuse (very minimal)

Word Count: 1400

You had just finished up a show. You had sung your heart out to the small crowd of party people and heavy drinkers and were ready to escape. You slipped out the back door of the venue to avoid the smell of smoke and cheap vodka, only to find yourself face to face with a man who smelled like both.

“Heyyy baby, good job out there tonight… how about we take the after party to my place?” he breathed into your face.

“No thanks,” you replied, trying to push your way past him. He caught you by the arm and pushed you back against the wall in the small alleyway.

“Now, that’s not very nice… I just wanted to have some fun, baby…”

“Get off of me!” you cried. You knew this was bad, there was no one else around to help you out and you weren’t strong enough to push him away, despite his drunkenness. 

“Come on… don’t be like that… I don’t wanna have to get rough with-”

“Get off of her,” another voice sounded down the alleyway. You both turned to look towards the source. “Now.”

The owner of the voice was a tall, muscled, mutant. He was wearing a black hoodie, but you could make out the lizard features on his face. He definitely looked strong enough to kick this creep’s ass.

“What are you? A lizard?” the other guy laughed. “Get out of here, mutant, this is between me and her.”

He continued walking up, however, and grabbed the arm that was holding you against the wall. He squeezed and the drunk man screeched out in pain, releasing you. You quickly dashed behind your savior, watching in awe as he eventually let go. The drunk man jumped up, shot a vicious look at you, and ran off, screaming some obscenities about mutants.

You turned back to the man who saved you, quickly pulling him in for a hug. “Thank you, seriously, thank you.” 

“N-no problem…” he muttered, scratching the back of his neck.

“I don’t know what I would have done if you hadn’t shown up.” You were still shaking a little and could feel your eyes growing hot.

“Nah, I’m sure some hero would have shown up…”

You scoffed. “Right. You know the heroes only care about high-profile cases. They wouldn’t even look twice.” You could see his eyes widen and thought perhaps you saw a bit of blush on his scales. You didn’t know scales could show blush… “Anyway, thank you. My name is y/n.” You held out your hand.

“Shuichi,” he replied, hesitating for a moment before gently taking your hand. “What are you doing back here anyway?”

“Oh I was performing in the club. I’m a singer,” you threw out your best jazz hands and gave him a dazzling smile.

“Oh. You should be careful in alleyways,” he said, starting to turn away.

You weren’t sure why, but you grabbed onto his hoodie to stop him. “Oh! Sorry. Uh, Shuichi, I was just on my way to a party and I’d really like to thank you somehow. Any chance you’d want to come with?”

“I-I don’t know…” he looked away, scratching absently at the back of his neck again.

“Please? I promise I won’t leave you behind, I barely know anyone who’s gonna be there, so I’m basically in the same boat.” You flashed him your best puppy dog eyes.

Spinner hadn’t planned on saving anyone tonight, he was a villain afterall. But seeing you in trouble and knowing the heroes wouldn’t help even if they were around made him feel like he had to do something. You didn’t seem afraid of or disgusted by him, which was honestly kind of a first. Plus you seemed so innocent and naive. Who knows what could happen to a pretty girl at a party? So, he found himself walking beside you as you chattered along, telling him about your rich friend who was throwing this thing in a penthouse suite. You certainly recovered quickly.

Arriving at the hotel where the party was, you two got into the elevator and took it to the top floor. When the doors opened, you were greeted with a wall of people. You grabbed his hand and shouted into his ear, “I didn’t know there would be so many people... we won’t stay too long if you don’t want to.” You pushed your way through the crowd to find your rich friend.

Walking up to her, she smiled and cheered before giving you a hug. “I’m so glad you could make it!” she shouted above the noise.

“I brought a friend! This is Shuichi! Shuichi, this is Vanessa,” you said, introducing the two. He noticed the way her face fell into a look of confusion and disdain when she saw him.

“Oh… nice to meet you…” she said, turning away before even finishing the sentence. Of course. He was used to it. Why did he even come here? 

Before he could turn to leave, you grabbed his hand again and smiled at him, making his heart leap into his throat. “Let’s get a drink!” you suggested, leading him to the table.

You each grabbed a drink, though he opted for nonalcoholic. You threw yours back, and grabbed another. Finishing off that one almost as quickly as the first, you realized you had to pee. “I’m gonna find the bathroom, stay right here!” you told him. He nodded.

You went to use the bathroom. On your way out, you scanned the room for Shuichi. Right where you left him. You caught his eye and smiled, starting to make your way over to him. Before you could make it, your vision was blocked by a man you recognized. Your ex boyfriend. 

“Hey, y/n.”

“Hi. Bye,” you replied coldly, trying to push past him.

“Woah woah woah,” he shot back, refusing to move. “Come on, you came here to see me, right? Let’s talk.”

“I definitely did not. I’m trying to get back to my friend. Excuse me.”

Once again, your arm is grabbed. “Seriously, y/n, I want to talk. Don’t be like this.”

You opened your mouth to tell him off, but you were cut off by a familiar voice. “She doesn’t want to talk to you. Let her go.” You both turned to Shuichi, once again saving you. You felt bad, he wasn’t supposed to be your personal bodyguard.

Your ex laughed. “Who are you supposed to be? Her new boyfriend? Or is that just a hopeless pipe dream for you, freak?”

“Don’t call him that!” you shouted, ripping your arm from his grip. “He’s my friend.”

Vanessa came over, hearing the commotion. “Y/n, stop, you’re causing a scene. I think your friend here needs to leave,” she said, shooting a glare towards Shuichi.

“Are you serious? He’s protecting me from this creep!” you said, pointing towards your ex.

“Y/n, your ‘friend’ is the one causing an issue. He just wanted to talk to you. There’s no need to get so angry.”

Dumbfounded, you looked to Shuichi. He shrugged, looking like he had seen it all before. “Fine,” you said. “Then we’ll both leave.” You grabbed his hand and pushed back through the crowd and out the door.

You were both silent in the elevator and through the hotel lobby. Once you were outside, you let out a sigh. “I’m sorry. I knew they were assholes but I didn’t think they were THOSE kind of assholes.”

“It’s not your fault,” Shuichi said, shrugging again. “But they are kinda assholes.”

You laughed, twisting your foot on the pavement. “You also had to save me twice in one night. Sorry about that too.”

“I don’t mind. Just glad you’re okay.”

You both stood there for a moment, unsure of what to do. “Oh! Why don’t we go back to my place?” you clapped your hands together. “I have some wine and snacks!” The offer was purely innocent, but Spinner was immediately taken aback. You really were too naive for your own good, inviting over someone you had just met. 

“Uh, s-sure…” he said, blushing once again, and the two of you set off. He figured if you were going to be innocent, he should at least make sure you were safe. If the heroes wouldn’t protect you, he would. He would be your hero.

[artificialqueens]

Level Up, Chapter Seven (Branjie) - Holtzmanns

“Mom, I’m not going on a date with your financial advisor.” Vanessa has to resist the urge to roll her eyes, knowing that her mom won’t hesitate to rip her a new one for it if she catches her.

“He’s young and tall and wears a suit.” Vanessa’s mom points the spatula in her hand in her direction. “Don’t you wanna date a suit?”

“I’m pretty sure it’s you that wants to date a suit.” Vanessa raises an eyebrow as she hops onto the counter, her legs dangling.

AN: New chapter time - thank you guys for being so patient and waiting for this one. Writing is going a bit slow for me these days, which means slower updates. To anyone who’s left a review on this story, hi I love you, thanks for being great and giving me even more motivation to write. Seeing people are actually reading and enjoying a fic because they say so is a good kick in the butt for any author’s muse. Let me know what you think of this chapter, too. As always, thank you writ for betaing <3

“Absolutely not.”

“Why not, he’s cute! And polite too, you know how much I like that.”

“Mom, I’m not going on a date with your financial advisor.” Vanessa has to resist the urge to roll her eyes, knowing that her mom won’t hesitate to rip her a new one for it if she catches her.

“He’s young and tall and wears a suit.” Vanessa’s mom points the spatula in her hand in her direction. “Don’t you wanna date a suit?”

“I’m pretty sure it’s you that wants to date a suit.” Vanessa raises an eyebrow as she hops onto the counter, her legs dangling.

Vanessa’s mom shrugs her shoulders. “Just tryna help you out, baby. You haven’t dated anyone in a while, have you? Who was the last one? That ugly looking-”

“No need to roast my exes.” Vanessa makes a face when her mom snickers.

Vanessa appreciates her mom’s intentions, but sometimes they’re a little off the mark. Or a lot off the mark, from the guys that she’s tried to set Vanessa up with lately.

It’s not as if Vanessa isn’t out to her mom. She is, or rather, has tried to be. Multiple times. The first time was in high school, when Vanessa had kissed her best friend and cried about it to her mom after her friend had started to avoid her, and her mom had told her that it was a phase that she’d grow out of. And then there was college, where Vanessa’s mom would meet her various girlfriends with brightly coloured hair and piercings and eclectic fashion senses, only to call them her close friends. It’s the difference in how Vanessa’s mom has treated her ex-boyfriends versus ex-girlfriends, paying way more attention to the boys even when they hadn’t been anything to write home about.

Vanessa’s tried. But it’s hard to make the point stick when her mom laughs off the idea of having a girlfriend, changing the subject a little too quickly. But hey, it’s better than her mom wanting to disown her. Vanessa will take it.

A knock on the door gets Vanessa out of her head and she hops off the counter to pull it open, as her mom sets the dishes on the table. The pastry box in Alexis’ hands makes Vanessa light up and she grabs it, bringing it to the table while Alexis follows her inside.

“Nice to see you, too, Vanj.” Alexis sits down across from her, sticking out her tongue.

Vanessa sticks hers out right back. “I saw you earlier today at our place, chill. Didn’t even have time to miss ya.”

Their mom, at the head of the table between them both, waves her hands. “Shh. Don’t ruin the family dinner ambiance.”

Alexis snickers. “As if we don’t get into at least two arguments every time we all have dinner together.”

The monthly dinners remind Vanessa of a simpler time when the three of them were always under one roof. Her mom would make an extra effort to get home from work on time, cook them something that they could all eat together rather than something for Alexis and Vanessa to reheat when they got home from school. It’s nice that no matter how old they get, the dinners have stayed the same. The dishes are the ones that Vanessa’s enjoyed since being a kid, ones that she’s tried to replicate in her own kitchen with little success. But at least she still gets to enjoy them now, as an adult, at her mom’s.

“Pass me the rice.” Alexis holds her hands out, wiggling her fingers, and Vanessa’s about to reach for the corningware before noticing the glinting on Alexis’ wrist.

“Where’s that bracelet from? Damn, Rob splurged. Good for him.” Vanessa has to admit, Rob doesn’t have bad taste. The bracelet on Alexis’ wrist is delicate, the stones on it sparkling under the light.

“It’s from dad.” The nonchalant tone of Alexis’ voice makes Vanessa’s fork clang harder on her plate than she intends it to.

She has to resist the urge to roll her eyes. “Really? He’s buying your love now? That’s what it’s come to?”

“Don’t be jealous that he’s buying me gifts and not you.” Alexis sniffs, before taking another sip of her drink. “At least I’m making an effort with him.”

“I’m not jeal-”

“Stubbornness doesn’t get you anywhere. He says he misses you, ‘cept you won’t give him the time of the day.” Alexis shrugs, and Vanessa can feel her hands balling into fists.

“‘Cause he doesn’t deserve it, that’s why.”

“Not that he’d want you around with that attitude anyway.” Alexis raises her eyebrows, and Vanessa’s seeing red, she really is, because fuck her sister-

Vanessa’s mom’s hand is up at her shoulders, blocking her from standing up before she can do so. “Don’t punch your sister.”

“I’m going.” Vanessa growls out, trying to scoot her chair back because she hates it, the smugness radiating off of Alexis for absolutely no reason. When she has nothing to be proud about.

“No you’re not. Sit down and eat your food.” Their mom looks tired as she takes a drink of her wine, nearly draining the glass.

Vanessa scowls. “How do you not care about this? Doesn’t it bother you?”

Because heaven knows, it bothers Vanessa. It doesn’t make sense, their dad wanting to connect now after not giving a shit for so long, and why is Alexis playing right into it? Why should their dad just get whatever he wants whenever it’s convenient for him?

Their mom sighs. “Because I am an adult, and so is Alexis. And so are you, if you’d mature a bit. It’s not a bad idea to give people second chances.”

“He’s not buying my affection back. Fuck that.” Vanessa crosses her arms. “How’d he even afford that bracelet, anyway? He’s never been the type to be financially stable.”

“If you’d ever talked with him, you’d know he’s turning his life around. He’s doing better.” Alexis’ smug tone is nauseating, enough to make Vanessa’s skin crawl.

It all sounds so fake, so put on. Like their dad’s trying hard to impress them and the fact that Alexis is buying into it? Pathetic, in Vanessa’s opinion.

She can do better. They all can. Not that Alexis seems to want to do so.

Vanessa’s brain feels like it’s floating inside of a dark cloud as she leaves her mother’s apartment with Alexis. The subway is only a few blocks away, but it feels so much longer to Vanessa while trying not to talk to her sister, as to not give her the satisfaction she wants. Because she knows Alexis thinks she’s in the right, and that she always is, as the older one. That Vanessa’s eventually going to give in and follow her advice.

Her phone buzzes as they wait at a busy intersection, and Vanessa almost misses the signal to cross when she sees the picture that pops up on her screen.

It’s a cat so fluffy that it’s reminiscent of a mountain lion, and Vanessa can’t help but squeal. Brooke’s mentioned her cats before but Vanessa’s never seen pictures of them, because she’d definitely remember such a sight.

The cat in the picture is stretched out on a couch, his paws up in the air as he sleeps. Vanessa hits the text notification that follows, trying to ignore the smile growing on her own face.

BLH: Henry’s as excited for our practice tomorrow as we are. His hands are already protecting his face.

VVM: WHY IS YOUR CAT SO CUTE

VVM: sorry no caps lock

VVM: but also yes caps lock

BLH: You should meet him and his brother sometime!

VVM: PLEASE

“Alexis? We should get a cat.” Vanessa nudges her sister as they descend the steps towards the subway.

Alexis rolls her eyes. “Oh, so you’re talking to me now?”

Vanessa doesn’t respond right away, in favour of looking at the second picture that pops up on her phone, the grey cat sleeping on Brooke’s coffee table. “Bet Rob would like one.”

“He already gets enough p-”

“Don’t complete that sentence, ew!” Vanessa pretends to dry heave as her sister cracks up, the ice that has been building up between them the entire evening breaking into pieces.

Vanessa knows Alexis and her will be fine because they always are, for how much they bicker. It would just be easier if neither of them were so stubborn. Not that Vanessa’s going to be the one to give in this time.

Brooke’s already in the gym when Vanessa pushes her way in the next morning, trying to hide the yawn behind her hand that betrays the fact that it’s 6:45 and the sun still hasn’t risen outside. Vanessa’s eyebrows push together when Brooke spins almost comically to face her, coffee in one hand and breakfast burrito in the other.

“Why are you so perky this morning?” Vanessa herself isn’t, that’s for sure. Not when she’s used to pressing snooze on her alarms until the last possible moment before she has to get up for work.

Brooke shrugs, though her energy is nervous, her foot tapping on the floor. “This is our first training session.”

“You’ve been training me for months.” Vanessa replies, raising an eyebrow as she does, and Brooke shrugs.

“Yeah, but this is the first actual session. I’m coaching you. Trying to get things into your brain.”

“You’ve done that plenty with your terrible singing. There’s no way I can get that belting out of my brain, ever.” Vanessa snickers, reaching out to pat Brooke’s shoulder as she pouts. “Kidding.”

“I’m a great singer. I got the gumption,” Brooke sniffs, “I can’t help it when Celine is on.”

“Is that why your workout playlist has so many ballads?”

Vanessa ducks out of the way when Brooke grumbles, reaching over to shove her shoulder. “Tell me why I should coach you again?”

“‘Cause I’m a delight, and you know it.” Vanessa grins, batting her eyelashes, and Brooke rolls her eyes.

“Go get changed, you delight. We have stuff to do.”

Vanessa pauses at the locker room doors once she’s in her workout clothes at the sight in front of her. There’s a mosaic of pages ripped out of notebooks scattered along the floor, interspersed with diagrams drawn on chart paper, all neatly arranged while Brooke sits in the middle.

“Wanna explain?” Vanessa’s not sure if Brooke hears her at first, from the way she’s furiously scribbling on the page in her lap, but then Brooke’s head comically bobs up as her fingers tap on her knee.

Brooke shifts in place. “Okay, so I didn’t exactly know where to start. I mean, I was thinking I could try and think back to how my dad used to coach me but that’s not a box worth opening right now, y’know? I mean I could, but repression is way more tempting. So then I was looking up coaching methods and what works for one person may not work for another, and then I started thinking about how I really didn’t know what style worked for you best and what would be the most effective way for us to collaborate and…” Brooke cuts herself off as she takes a breath, weakly pointing to the mess around her. “So we have this.”

Vanessa whistles, crouches down beside Brooke while trying not to rustle any of the papers. “There’s a lot to untangle here.”

“We can’t go wrong with being too prepared, right? At least we can try everything and then maybe one thing is going to work and I’ll actually be useful as a coach.” Brooke shrugs sheepishly.

“What are you out here talking about, useful as a coach? You’re plenty useful. Look at how much I’ve improved over the last few months.” Vanessa throws a look at Brooke, who for once, looks slightly self conscious, from the way she fiddles with her sleeves. “You’re telling me our practices together haven’t made a difference in my fighting skills?”

“Maybe a little,” Brooke admits, “but how do you know any of it was me? You’re taking classes at the same time, you’re building that muscle memory. That plays a big part.”

“And how would I build muscle memory if it wasn’t for our practices?” Brooke looks unconvinced, so Vanessa carries on. “Look. I ain’t asking you ‘cause I think you’re an Olympic champion boxer, or anything like that. I’m asking you ‘cause you know your shit and you can handle me in the gym and know how to get me to cool down. I need that.”

Vanessa thinks back to their last practice, when all Brooke had to do was hand Vanessa a granola bar to give her some sugar and Vanessa found herself able to focus, less frustrated during their drills. It’s almost like Brooke is learning the little parts of her that don’t necessarily come up in conversation, more so the ones that only become obvious when you truly pay attention.

She nudges Brooke’s side. “I don’t care if you haven’t coached before. I’ve never been a boxer before any of this shit. You think I know what I’m doing? I don’t care if you don’t know what you’re doing.”

“Okay, but I really, really, don’t know what I’m doing-”

Vanessa shrugs. “Well then, we make a good team. If we’re gonna do this blindly, at least we’ve got each other for the journey.”

Brooke gathers up some of the papers around her, holding them out in front of Vanessa. “We won’t be doing it completely blindly, though, I was thinking we could try out methods that are evidence based and see what works the best and what leads to carryover-”

“I don’t know why you’re bringing up some academic shit right now, in a gym of all places, but what we’re gonna do is try shit until something sticks.” Vanessa grabs the pile of papers in Brooke’s hands, smoothes them out.

Brooke snorts. “That’s basically what I said.”

“Be less boring about it, then.”

It’s enough to get Brooke smiling, though, reducing the nervous energy that is radiating off of her in waves. “Get your gear on. We’re going to get to work.”

“That’s more like it.”

And so it begins. Vanessa’s alarm clock is set an hour and a half earlier every morning, the sun rising in tandem with her body heat during her first workout of each day. Brooke doesn’t pull any punches with the conditioning routines that she drafts every morning - Vanessa had thought in the past that Kameron was bad with the cardio and strength outside of the ring, but Brooke’s making her feel like she’s a beginner again, from how much her muscles are complaining with every move she makes.

Take today, for example. The circuit that Brooke’s written out on her clipboard is torturous, positively torturous, and Vanessa knows that she has to get through it eight times, but she’s only on her third round and she’s already about to collapse, never to get up again. She wipes the sweat off of her forehead before resting her hands on her knees, bending over in half to try and catch her breath, before Brooke’s voice behind her rings like a bell.

“Mountain climbers, let’s go! No stopping.”

“Bitch, do you want me to die?” Vanessa pants out as she gets on all fours nonetheless, her arms shaking as she presses her palms into the ground.

“No. But what I don’t want is for your endurance to putter out during a match at the worst time. You’re gonna have to build it, and not only that, but learn to push through when it feels like you can’t.”

Maybe if Vanessa wasn’t currently dripping sweat onto the mats below her, her arms about to give out, then she’d be moved by the almost poetic words. But she’s too out of breath to care, especially when all she can focus on as she stands back up is the way her legs feel like jelly and her arms like anchors that are about to break off.

Brooke’s look is sympathetic as Vanessa rolls out her shoulders, preparing to do her set of burpees next. “It’s not always going to be this difficult. Your body is going to build and build and build that strength and endurance and soon, you’ll be able to do all of it without breaking a sweat.”

Vanessa has to pause as she crouches down to shoot Brooke a look. “See, I’d believe that, pants on fire, if you weren’t making the circuits longer and more intense every damn session. How’s it gonna get easier if you keep upping the difficulty?”

“You haven’t died yet, have you?” Brooke sips on her iced coffee almost languidly, not a hair out of place, and Vanessa has to hold back a grumble.

She’s going to kill Brooke one of these days, she really is, if Brooke doesn’t kill her with these workouts first.

But Vanessa does trust Brooke, and so keeps pushing herself, follows each routine as best as she can and not skipping reps if she can help it. Sure, she can’t move her muscles without pain, and Silky and A’keria look at her funny even though she swears that her waddling isn’t because she’s getting some good dick, she’s just working out, that’s all, but…it’s worth it. It has to be worth it, Vanessa isn’t going to allow herself to believe anything else. She’s pushing her body to the limit for a purpose, and that purpose is to kick some ass in a boxing ring and feel good about it.

That’s what Vanessa tells herself at least, as more and more of her hours not spent at work become dedicated to training, going for massages for her sore muscles, and watching old boxing matches instead of Netflix whenever Brooke gives her boxers to research. It doesn’t feel like it’s a drastic change because it’s still fun to Vanessa, pushing her in ways that she’s never expected.

A’keria gives Vanessa an apprehensive look, though, when she hides one too many yawns behind her palm one day at work. She’s not necessarily falling asleep as she does the client’s makeup, but her morning workout today had been more grueling than usual, and having to stand for hours on end at the moment isn’t doing her sore limbs any favours.

“Can I ask you something, Vanj?” A’keria’s eyes remain on the client in front of her, the comb in between her fingers expertly parting the woman’s hair.

Vanessa squints her eyes as she blends the shadows on her client’s crease, trying to get both eyes to match. “Yeah, what?”

“Why are you doing all of this? The boxing, the gym?” A’keria looks up at Vanessa, the motions of her hands stalled. “What’s the point?”

“Didn’t I tell you at the beginning? Alexis made me so I’d stop blowing up in her face.” It may be the short answer, Vanessa knows, but it works for now.

A’keria sighs, and her eyes are too knowing, too willing to look into Vanessa’s soul. “Sure, I get a couple of classes here and there. But you’re running yourself ragged.”

Vanessa scoffs. “Am not.”

Because she’s not. It’s just what she needs to do, and how’s she going to get anywhere if she doesn’t? The next tournament is coming up soon, and if she does well in this one at the higher level then hey, maybe she can compete even more regularly and maybe have a proper match and-

“Just promise me that you’re taking care of yourself. And I don’t want an empty promise of you just nodding your head and saying yes, Kiki, I will, I want an actual promise that you’re gonna put yourself first.” A’keria points her comb towards Vanessa and she feels like she’s five, being reprimanded by her kindergarten teacher.

“I am putting myself first. Have you seen my guns? That’s self love, baby.” Vanessa flexes her bicep, pretends to give it a kiss and it’s worth it when the client in front of Vanessa lets out a giggle, and even more so when A’keria rolls her eyes.

“Tell me why I still care about your stupid ass.”

Vanessa doesn’t miss a beat. “‘Cause you love me.”

“Somehow.” A’keria mutters, turning back towards her model. “But if you don’t take care of yourself while doing this boxing nonsense, I’m gonna have to whoop your ass.”

“Duly noted.” Vanessa snickers, and it’s enough for A’keria, whose frown lines smooth out between her eyebrows. “Didn’t know you were so worried ‘bout me.”

A’keria shoots her a look. “Why wouldn’t I be? You’re one of my best friends. And who else would listen to me griping about my man? You think Silky pays any attention to anything but Jerry Springer on the TV?”

“You’ve got a point there. So, update me,” Vanessa leans towards A’keria, a conspiratorial tone in her voice, “are y’all back together yet? Or are you still leaving him on read for exactly seventy two hours before texting him back? Which, by the way, makes no sense as a strategy.”

“It’s kept him for this long, hasn’t it?” A’keria shrugs her shoulders, a proud smile playing on her lips. “He always comes back. It’s like I have him on a rubber band that always snaps back into place. Never fails.”

“That makes no damn sense, and you know it. But men never do.”

Vanessa’s glad she’s not with a guy for now. She’s always found it so confusing, with the games and the signals that inevitably get crossed and the misunderstandings and it’s much easier, really, hearing about it secondhand from her friends.

Not that being interested in girls can be any better, from what she notices at their next practice before the next tournament. Vanessa had her session with Brooke in the morning and she’s back now hours later in the gym, a place that she feels like she never leaves anymore, curled up on a bench in the locker room and watching the scene that’s unfolding in front of her.

To any ordinary bystander, this scenario would be representative of any millennials - a girl swiping through Tinder with her friends providing commentary beside her. But what Vanessa really sees is Monique showing off the various pictures that pop up on her phone, while remaining completely oblivious to Monet sulking on the bench that is perpendicular to her. Sulking may be a stretch, but Vanessa can tell that the force with which Monet tugs on the zipper of her gym bag isn’t typical - it’s a sign that she’s unhappy with the situation.

“What about this girl? She put a quote from Shark Tale in her bio. And she lives on the east side. Imma swipe right.” Monique holds up her phone, and the brunette on her screen is cute, yes, but Monet’s shoulders slump a little and it becomes just a little bit harder to react in a blase way.

“Uh, yeah. Super cute. Love that.” Vanessa gives Monet a thumbs up, and she can feel Asia’s elbow in her side because of how unconvincing she is but hey, she’s trying.

She scoots down slightly on the bench, leans over to whisper. “What do you expect me to even say?”

“I dunno, but flashing a thumbs up ain’t gonna do the trick.” Asia mutters under her breath, jerking her head towards Monet, who’s begun to braid her hair with a scowl on her face.

Vanessa shrugs her shoulders, trying to keep her voice from exploding as much as it wants to. “So what the hell do we do?”

“What do you mean, what do we do? We don’t do anything because they’re adults, and they can sort it out themselves.” Asia’s look is pointed, one that Vanessa delicately chooses to ignore.

“We can’t do that. They’ll be miserable. Neither of them even realizes how much they like each other, and they’ll just keep doing this stupid dance.” Vanessa chances a glance towards Monique, who’s slowly lowering her phone back towards herself after Monet turns away with a curt nod. “This is ridiculous.”

Asia sighs. “You think they’re gonna hear a word we say? Hey, dumbasses, you both have a crush on your best friend, spoiler alert, it’s each other. They’re gonna tell us that we’re being silly and they’ll be in even more denial.”

Vanessa bites her lip, because the jealousy that’s radiating off of Monet is hard to miss, except apparently for Monique, who shuts off her phone and sighs as she stands up. “Ugh. You’re right. Doesn’t make this shit easier to watch.”

Vanessa keeps an eye on them throughout the class, nearly catching a jab in the face from Asia in the process. Monet and Monique seem to be back to their normal selves, bickering as they practice their drills but Vanessa doesn’t miss the lingering glance from Monet as Monique fills up her water bottle, or the way that Monique opens up her mouth to say something, eyes wide, as they finish an exercise before abruptly closing it. Vanessa feels like she’s watching a movie where she just wants to yell at the main characters to kiss already, except it’s two of her friends who should be together but are only now beginning to realize how much they like each other.

“Don’t do it.” Brooke’s holding back a smile at her desk when Vanessa falls into the chair across from her once the class is over, after regaling Brooke with Monique and Monet’s situation.

“Not doing anything. But I want to.” Vanessa slouches in her seat, resting her cheek on her palm. “Those two clowns are perfect for each other. Hell, I thought they were already together when I first started here.”

It’s not a lie. Vanessa remembers the way that Monique and Monet would always finish each other’s sentences, and be holding on to each other in some form or another. They still do, though Vanessa does notice more hesitancy lately in the way they reach out, more tentativeness in their words.

Brooke shakes her head, leaning forward on her desk. “You have to let them work it out themselves. Forcing something between them when neither of them seems fully ready is only going to lead to a mess.”

“You say that as if we’re all not already a mess.”

Brooke snorts. “True. You most of all.”

“Rude-”

“Kidding.”

“Good, you better be.” Vanessa sniffs, though she can’t keep a straight face for long, not when Brooke’s already holding back a laugh.

Brooke shrugs, thumbing through a pile of papers on the corner of her desk before pulling one from the stack, turning it towards Vanessa. The flyer for the upcoming tournament is a bit of an eyesore with the neon colours, but Vanessa tries to ignore the attempts at graphic design as Brooke points at the upcoming date. “Isn’t the tournament that you all signed up for coming up soon, anyway? It’s at least a three hour drive to get there. Maybe the two of them will talk it out during the ride.”

“Or they’ll ignore the huge elephant in the room and just pretend like absolutely nothing is going on.” Vanessa shrugs. “I feel like it could go either way.”

“Sooner or later, they’ll reach a point where they have no choice but to confront it. And when they do, they’ll see what’s been in front of them this whole time.” Brooke leans back in her own seat, and Vanessa can’t help but raise an eyebrow.

“That’s somehow the sappiest thing I’ve ever heard you say. Are you a secret romantic?”

Brooke makes a face. “Most definitely not. I’ll take a comedy over watching something like The Notebook any day.”

Vanessa’s mouth drops open. “You take that back. That’s my favourite movie!”

“The Notebook? Really? You can’t call me sappy if that’s your favourite. Do you cry every time you watch it, too?”

“Maybe?” Vanessa raises her hands in surrender. “I can’t help it! It just tugs on the heartstrings.”

“Why watch it if it just makes you sad?” Brooke has confusion written across her face, and Vanessa has to pause while she thinks of an answer.

“I dunno. It’s sad but it’s a good sad, y’know? The kind that makes you feel something ‘cause even if there’s loss they still had so much love, and those moments are the ones that make everything else worth going through.”

Vanessa can’t help the longing in her voice because as silly as it sounds, she wants something like that. Something worth fighting for. Maybe it’s cliche, maybe it’s the thoughts of a teenage Vanessa from all those years ago who’d watched the movie for the very first time, but she still wants that feeling.

But who knows. Teenage Vanessa had also wanted a perm back in the day, and that had been a mess that had taken years to grow out.

“You’re the secret romantic between the two of us.” Brooke tilts her head and Vanessa shrugs, because she can’t deny it, not really.

“Who said it was a secret? I got taste between the two of us.” Vanessa can’t help but snicker at Brooke’s mock offended face.

“Just for that, we’re starting half an hour earlier tomorrow for training.”

Vanessa though, is unperturbed. “Liar. You hate waking up early as it is. I know you too well.”

“Maybe.” But the way Brooke’s eyes are glimmering, the way she has a grin of her own, somehow makes Vanessa want to know her even more.

[samwilsonshandsandass]

Chapter 13 of Mr. Cavill you dog is kinda fat by @keanureevesisbae

‘I’m a changed man, Livi.’

I will only ever trust that sentence if it’s backed by numerous actions

 Wesley could’ve stabbed me in my stomach and that wouldn’t have hurt or shocked me, as I am now. ‘He is six?’ I ask him, trying so hard not to raise my voice. ‘You knocked someone up right after you left me?’ Wesley doesn’t say a word. ‘Oh my God,’ I say in utter disbelieve, running my fingers through my hair. ‘You are un-fucking-believable. You left me, let me figure this whole parenting thing out all on my own, while you start a family? Wesley, what the fuck is wrong with you? I can’t believe this. You leave me, my whole family leaves me, because I got pregnant. Have you any idea in what kind of fucking situation you put me through?’

He's even more of a piece of shit than I thought

 ‘I want to get to know her.’

Are you fucking shitting me?!

 It’s quiet for a few seconds, before I finally snap again. ‘That idiot honestly thought that he could just barge right back into my life, after everything he didn’t do for me?’ I ask myself out loud. ‘That bastard had the guts, the guts, to hand me over his card, so I could call him if we change our minds about it. Did you know he has a new lady, who is pregnant and already gave birth to a kid of him? That kid is six. Six! While I’m struggling with my job, with my new baby all by myself, he is out there, impregnating this other woman…’ ‘Mommy, what is impregnating?’ ‘… having kids with her and being a loyal loving family man. What the hell is wrong with him? Now I finally,  finally have the life that I wanted for both myself and Vanessa and he has the nerves to just walk into my life again? Thinking he can do that? Why are men such big fat pigs? Who has the audacity to look around in a restaurant, see his ex girlfriend with her daughter and obviously her new boyfriend and just walk up to them to ask: ‘Is this her?’. Like he knows Vanessa. Like he was there for her when she was just born!’

  ‘Because… I want to get to know him.’ I sigh deeply. ‘Sweetheart, he left you, before you were born. I think that is all you need to know about him. Besides, you have a great dad now.’ She nods. ‘I know, but I want to ask him something.’ ‘What do you wanna ask him?’ ‘Why he left.’

  ‘But what if she likes him more?’ I ask and I realize that was my fear all along. ‘I tried so hard for her and what if she meets him and thinks: oh, that man, I like him a lot more than I like my mom and the entire family she gave me.’

My heart just ripped in half even just at the thought of this happening

 ‘No, no, no,’ Henry says, ‘you know that is not going to happen. Because of your honesty to her all these previous years, she is well aware of what he did to both you and her. It’s always her biggest fear that I’m leaving after she did something that she shouldn’t do. I think she just wants some answers, so she can think about it.’

And my heart tore a little more and then mended itself a tiny bit

 I’m surprised Wesley is early. He was always late when we dated. Maybe he did change, a little bit. Before we walk into the cafe, I stop Vanessa in her tracks and I say: ‘You can ask him anything you want. If there is something he says that you don’t like, you can tell him that. If you want to leave, you can just ask me or Henry and we’ll leave right away. Remember, you don’t owe him anything.’

This is so important to tell Vanessa that this is in her hands!

 Wesley takes her hand in his, while he keeps standing up. I don’t want to compare (but I’m still gonna), but all the insanely tall Cavills crouch down when they talk to her. ‘Hi Vanessa, I’m Wesley.’

This is such a good example of show don’t tell, I mean how do you not crouch down on the child’s level? Who is this awful? Even the leaders of entire countries do that!

 ‘Why did you leave my mommy?’ ‘Because I was scared,’ he says. ‘I thought I wasn’t ready to be a dad yet.’ There is so much I want to say to him. You think I was ready to become a mother? You think I wasn’t scared?

Seriously, show me one person, especially women, who aren’t scared of becoming a parent for the first time, especially under the pressure society puts on them in the manner of “Motherhood is a woman’s greatest calling and there is no reason to be scared or bad parts or whatever”

 ‘Why didn’t you want to love me?’ … Wesley doesn’t know what to say. ‘Am I that unloveable?’ she continues to ask.

My heart is breaking again

 Vanessa frowns. ‘But he didn’t love me.’ ‘He didn’t even want to love you. He didn’t even try,’ I say, not caring he is there and can totally hear this. ‘Remember sweetheart, he walked out on you and me, not the other way around.’ ‘I was scared,’ Wesley tells me. ‘Don’t you think I was?’ I ask him, absolutely dumbfounded. I turn to Vanessa again and ask her: ‘Remember what I always tell you? About fear?’ She nods. ‘That you are allowed to be scared, but that it should never stop you in life.’

This child is the best and for the rest, refer back to the above. This man is unbelievable. Instilling the notion of not being lovable in Vanessa before she’s even born and then trying to justify himself with this weak-ass shit without any kind of introspective

 ‘You know,’ Vanessa continues, ‘I always wondered why I didn’t have a dad. Kids in my class have one and I wanted one too.’ ‘I understand,’ Wesley says, though he grows more uncomfortable with the second. I bet he underestimated my daughter and her communication skills and now he should deal with the consequences of that easy thinking of his.

Don’t underestimate children ever but especially don’t underestimate this child

 ‘And then my mommy met Henry,’ she says with a beaming smile. ‘He is a real daddy, you know. He bought me my first bike, my first Christmas tree and he took my out on a Valentines date two days ago.’ Yes, honey, please rub it in.

Tell him everything girl!

 Wesley takes a sip of his coffee and he actually is trying to leave, I can totally see it in his body language. ‘Where do you think you’re going?’ Henry asks, picking up on those signs as well. ‘You sit down now. Vanessa is talking to you and you better listen to it.’

Okay but Henry has never met this man and each person has kinda different body language and tells (even if they’re small differences) and still he saw right through him

 Vanessa nods. ‘He is going to adopt me soon,’ she continues, eyes shining bright with excitement. ‘And then we are officially a family.’ ‘Right.’

Rub it in rub it in rub it in rub it in

 ‘My mommy cried a lot because of you. She didn’t know I saw her, but usually at night she would cry on the couch. I heard her talking to my auntie Belle about you and that I don’t have a daddy. That’s your fault.’ … ‘Vanessa,’ Wesley says, ‘I don’t want to have this conversation with you.’

Wesley is not only a piece of shit he is also a coward. Yes, this is a seven year old child telling you in all honesty what she feels and how she feels about him but on top of that Wesley lacks any kind of introspective and he had seven years to work on that plus a new family which somehow has to endure him/lives with him

 She seems a bit shocked. ‘Why not?’ she asks. ‘Yeah, Wesley, why not?’ I ask him, crossing my arms in front of my chest. ‘Tell her why not.’ ‘This is a grown up conversation.’ ‘No, it’s not,’ I retort. ‘It’s about her, so she should have a conversation with you and if you are intimidated by a seven year old, then you are really even less of a man than I figured you were.’ Henry clears his throat. ‘You keep your ass on that chair and if you don’t do that, I have no problems at all forcing you onto that seat. You listen to Vanessa and you have a conversation with her. Right here and right now.’

If he expected anything less, he’s even dumber than I thought

 She thinks about her next move long and hard. ‘Cool.’ Vanessa simply stares at him and even tilts her head. ‘I don’t like you.’ My mouth falls open and I can’t help but feel so proud of her. ‘Excuse me, what?’ Wesley asks. ‘I don’t like you,’ she repeats, rolling her eyes and I can almost hear her thinking: Are you deaf? ‘You made me sad, because you walked out before I was born. You made my mommy sad and very angry yesterday and I don’t like it when that happens. I am happy that I saw you, because now I know that you… Mommy, can I say this?’ ‘Go for it.’ ‘Now I know that you really are an idiot.’ She looks at Henry. ‘Right, daddy?’ Henry nods. ‘You’re totally right, sunshine.’

YOU GO GIRL

 ‘You allow this?’ Wesley asks me. ‘You allow this kind of talk?’ ‘I didn’t know you had the right to give an opinion about my parenting skills,’ I say to him. ‘I wanted a second chance, but with what you are telling her about me…’

Wesley loses an IQ point with each second by himself through being himself

 ‘Is the truth, buddy,’ Henry says. ‘What did you think would happen? That they waited seven years for you to come back? Of course not. You left them and Olivia made the brave choice of raising her daughter with the upmost honesty and respect, something that you obviously lack.’ ‘And you think you can just barge into their lives and be the savior?’ Wesley retorts. ‘Excuse me?’ Henry asks. ‘I’ve been acting more like a dad to Vanessa in one day than you have been your entire life. I think you should be grateful that I swooped in and give her the dad she deserves to have.’

And apart from that, his dog threw up on his carpet and that set everything in motion but Wesley doesn’t need to know that

 ‘You totally set this kid up,’ he continues. ‘Talking bad about me behind my back.’ ‘Well, I would’ve talked bad about you right in your face, but you walked out of my life, remember?’

This is one of the situations where what happens/happened is actually their fault. And gaslighting? He is getting worse and worse by the second and I didn’t think that was possible

 ‘I do, actually and I did waltz into their lives. Turned out to be amazing. Honestly, Wesley, you don’t know what you’re missing. Vanessa is such a bright and intelligent and well spoken girl and Olivia is fascinating on her own and an amazing mother.’

Olivia marry this man asap

 Wesley doesn’t have any control over himself anymore, because he launches forward, planning on hitting Henry, who doesn’t seem impressed one single second. Henry grabs my lousy ex boyfriend by his collar and pushes him against the wall. ‘What was that?’ he asks unbothered.

Who thinks of the idea of hitting a man of this body, height, posture, muscle mass and strength and thinks that’s a good idea? Like, every camera, even when used by professionals make you heavier by, say, 20lbs. So, in real life Henry (like every person) is a little slimer than on camera but his muscles stay and everyone can see what weights he lifts and how he runs and through his movies we also know how he moves in a fight and then hitting him seems like a good idea? Holy shit how dumb is this man?

 God, he is sexy and this is totally doing things to my panties right now.

Same

 ‘Easy, wasn’t it?’ I could’ve known that Henry wasn’t going to just let him go. He throws Wesley to the ground and says: ‘You big piece of shit.’

How is this so hot

 ‘You are truly Superman, daddy,’ Vanessa says with a smile. ‘We are really tough, aren’t we?’

Vanessa sees him as Superman but she sees all of them as tough and ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

 The Cavill and Tran family groupchat Piers: I already told you guys, but I am proud that you told that idiot off and please tell me what Vanessa wants. I want to buy her a present for being such a total bad ass. Charlie: I swear, if I ever run into him, I’m going to throw him accidentally in front of the bus. What a fucking idiot. Mom: Charlie! Charlie: What? You said the exact same thing! Mom: But with you, I never know if you mean it. I don’t want any of my kids in jail, even if I agree with your actions. Dad: I’ll do it then. I’m old anyways. I have nothing to lose. Mom: Colin! Niki: Yeah, you go dad. You go throw that fucking moron in front of the bus. Henry: I support you, dad. Olivia: Not to be that kind of person, but I’d rather you spend time with Vanessa than in jail. Please leave the idiot alone. Mom: Finally some common sense in this group chat. I’m glad we added you, Olivia, because it can be hard being a woman alone with these guys. Dad: So I can’t throw him in front of the bus? Olivia: No, I’m sorry. I can tell you this though: resisting the urge to kill him, will get easier over time. Henry: I hope you are right, love. Simon: Not to be that guy, but Olivia, can you give me Belle’s number?

Have I already said I love their group chat? And Simon you go!

[missjanjie]

Branjie Fic | Bad Girls Club (6/?)

Title: Bad Girls Club Summary:  Los Angeles’ new program, the Juvenile Female Rehabilitation Program (JFRP) was created with the purpose of taking at-risk girls in the county and send them to a summer-long program located where a sleepaway camp once stood. There, they will take classes in ethics, behavior, and other courses to help mold these young minds. Brooke Lynn and Vanessa have been sent there for wildly different reasons, but with the same result - a clean permanent record. Being roomed together, the pair might find an unlikely alliance (and maybe more) in each other. Word Count: ~2.9k (this chapter)/~16.1k (total) Relationship: Branjie (Brooke Lynn Hytes/Vanessa Vanjie Mateo) Rating: E

Read on AO3

[June 6th, 2018]

“Tradition or not, this shit gonna get our asses busted one of these days, and I don’t know about y’all, but I’m trynna haul ass outta this zip code as soon as I can.”

“God, who invited Captain Buzzkill?” Vanessa rolled her eyes. “You as fucked up as we are, Silk. So, shut up and grab a box.” She passed a box of snap poppers to Silky and A’keria and kept one for herself. Glancing over her shoulder, she opened hers up and took one of the small, wrapped spheres between her thumb and finger. “On three.”

In stage whispers, the three girls counted down from three before throwing the little balls at the stairs of their high school, giggling as the loud snaps filled the otherwise quiet night – well, quiet for that part of town, anyway. Despite the complaints, it was still one of their most cherished traditions, dating back to eighth grade when they set off the poppers at their middle school the night after the last day, ringing in the start of the summer.

The girls were so caught up in their celebration that they failed to notice the police officer walking up behind them until he cleared his throat to get their attention.

“Seriously, you guys?” He pinched the bridge of his nose as the three teenagers scrambled upright in a haphazard (and fruitless) attempt to save face. “Alright, you know the drill. Davenport, Ganache, Mateo, into the car.” And they were left with no option but to comply.

While the process was always the same, the outcome varied based on multiple factors – the type of crime, the time of day, whether or not Officer Watts was fighting with his wife – but everything was added to the books, so to speak. Tonight, it just seemed like he couldn’t be bothered to do more than go through the motions, bringing each girl home and walking them to the door, so their guardians knew just where they’d been.

Vanessa was the last stop and the officer dropped her off to her mom with the repeated normalcy as any sort of scheduled custody exchange. “Say hi to Kimberly and the kids for me!” she called out as Officer Watts returned to his patrol car.

“Don’t try to buddy your way out of this, Vanessa. I’m getting real tired of this bullshit.” Her mother’s tone was as sharp as her glare, punctuated by the sound of the door slamming shut. “I see that police car come down this block more often than the ice cream truck! It’s like you’re not even trying to better yourself.”

“Better myself?” Vanessa scoffed and rolled her eyes. “What is this, My Fair Lady?” She calmed herself as quickly as she had snapped. “Sorry, sorry… but I promise we ain’t done nothing wrong, just hanging out.”

“Hanging out doesn’t get you brought home in a cop car. Don’t you ever stop and think about your future? How you gonna apply to college with a permanent record like that?”

The sudden silence that followed filled the room with a solemn sense of unease. Vanessa sat down on her couch and picked her dog up onto her lap. “Can we stop pretending I got a chance of going to college, Mom? We both know I’m not cut out for that.”

Her mother’s expression softened as she sat beside her on the couch. “Mija, I wish you could see the potential in yourself that I see in you.” She wrapped her arm around her and held her close. “You are not a lost cause, and I’m not giving up on you.”

[Present Day]

“Do you think prison’s actually like Orange is the New Black?” Vanessa asked, her gaze drifting from A’keria to the grass beneath her, ripping a handful of it from the ground and aimlessly scattering the blades.

A’keria quirked her brow. “Why you worried about it? The whole point of this shit is us getting clean records, so we don’t go to prison.” After a moment, she sighed and rolled her eyes. “Is this about the whole prison wife thing you think Brooke Lynn was talking about?”

Vanessa looked away as she answered. “No…” She chewed on her lip. “Not just her. You really think this shit is gonna stick? That we’re gonna go to college and get on the dean’s list or some shit? This whole thing is just so they can pass the blame onto us when we fuck up and land in jail for real.” As she finished her rant, she noticed the expression on her friend’s face. It wasn’t quite anger or sadness, but it made her chest tighten. “What?”

“I just didn’t think you, of all people, would give up on yourself.”

“I’m not!” she quickly defended. “I’m just being realistic.”

A’keria turned and cornered her into eye contact. “Are you? Or are you setting yourself up for failure on purpose, so you don’t have to get out of your comfort zone?”

Vanessa huffed and crossed her arms. “Since when are you into psycho-ana…psych-analy-a…” She gestured vaguely. “You know, dissecting my brain and shit.”

“It don’t take fuckin’ Einstein to know you’re being ridiculous. Look, I’m not saying I’m not gonna drink or smoke or do hoodrat shit after this, but we got a chance at actually having futures. And if you’re gonna sit and act like none of this ever happened when we get back home, you’re a hugehypocrite for being mad at Brooke Lynn for wanting to go back to the good life she had.”

It was rare for Vanessa to be at a loss for words, but she had no way to argue what had been said. It would be a conscious choice to go back home and get in trouble again, and she would be disappointing everyone that cared about her. So, maybe she couldn’t fault Brooke for longing to escape from this situation, but it didn’t resolve how she felt about her or even in general. She lay down on the ground and stared off into space while the sun warmed her skin. “I don’t know what to say to her.”

She nodded slowly. “I knew it would come back to that. You give so much of your heart so easily, Vanjie. You set yourself up to get hurt. Hell, you might still have a shot with her if you actually stop and think about what you say instead of shooting off at the mouth.”

Vanessa pushed herself back up, shaking her head. “Nah, not with how I’ve been. She probably thinks I’m psycho now.”

A’keria shifted to her side to properly look at her. “You won’t know if you don’t talk it out. Just… Don’t slip back into your old habits.”

“What old habits?”

“Really, bitch?”

[September 3rd, 2018]

“Okay, the suspense is killing me, so I’ll bite. What the hell is wrong with Vanjie?”

Silky rolled her eyes before looking in Vanessa’s direction. Their friend was sat at the other end of the lunch table, pouting with her arms crossed, but also looking sincerely solemn and crestfallen. “Oh, that girl she been hooking up with all summer dropped her ass ‘cause she has a boyfriend.”

A’keria let out an exaggerated groan. “I told her. Didn’t I tell her? I said, ‘watch yourself with her, she ain’t in it for the long haul,’ right to her.” She sighed and shook her head, deciding to save the well-earned ‘I told you so’ for later. For now, she needed to be a comforting friend. “Alright, c’mere baby. It’s gonna be okay,” she soothed and wrapped an arm around her.

“She got me fucked up, man,” Vanessa’s voice trembled as she spoke. “She really went and said she ‘never felt like this before’ and now she’s gonna act like I don’t exist. Who does that shit?”

“Straight girls,” Silky chimed in, which got a small laugh out of Vanessa – much to both of her friends’ relief.

With the tension lifted – at least for the moment – Vanessa pushed herself up to her feet. “I’m not gonna stay stressing over this, okay? I’m good, fuck her and her greasy-ass boyfriend.” And with that, the school bell rang, and they were all off to class.

Silky walked with A’keria, trailing a few steps behind Vanessa. “Do you actually think she’s done stressing over this?”

“Not a chance.”

Much to their chagrin, A’keria ended up being proven right not a full three days later.

All it took was one house party with just enough alcohol and Vanessa was making out with her summer fling off in a corner. She had one hand up the back of the girl’s shirt, the other tangled through her hair – it was as if nothing had changed at all.

Until it did, ten minutes later.

“Where are you going?” Vanessa asked, not about to be left high and dry without putting up a fight. “It was just getting good,” she added with a discontented huff.

“My boyfriend’s here,” the ex answered in a calloused tone, reapplying her lipstick without looking in Vanessa’s direction. She fluffed up her hair and sauntered off, wrapping her arms around some lanky, awkward looking guy and effectively acting as though Vanessa ceased to exist.

A’keria got up to collect her friend. “This time I’m not holding back the ‘I told you so.’”

[Present Day]

“Are you still giving me the cold shoulder?”

Vanessa shrugged it off. “There’s a lot worse I could be giving you. Don’t push it.”

Brooke Lynn sighed and pushed herself to sit up on her bed. “Baby, I can’t fix anything if you don’t tell me what’s wrong.” She pouted and reached out to grab Vanessa’s hand, swinging it slowly.

This wasn’t fair as far as Vanessa was concerned. How was she supposed to maintain her tough resolve when Brooke was giving her puppy dog eyes and a soft, pink pout? Her weakness was being used against her – it had been at least two days of freezing her out and she had been starting to get lonely anyway. She bit down on her lip and looked down. “I’m not trynna have this heart-to-heart yet. I know you ain’t about it, so the time has to be right.”

“Then let’s not talk.” Brooke noticed Vanessa wasn’t resisting her hold anymore, so she pulled her closer and closer until the smaller girl sat on her lap. “We don’t have to talk, just let me take your mind off it for a while,” she cooed as she started to place soft, slow kisses from her shoulder all the way up to her jaw.

The temptation was undeniable and nearly every part of Vanessa’s body was urging her towards Brooke. And at first, she gave in. She straddled her lap with her arms draped around her neck. Their foreheads rested against each other, lips just barely touching before connecting in a kiss. And another one, a deeper, languid one. For a moment, she was perfectly at ease. There was no yesterday or tomorrow to weigh down her mind – there was only now and only them in a dream of their own design.

Then she woke up to the sinking feeling that this was too easy. Not every problem could be solved by kissing pretty girls, no matter how hard she may try. She pulled away, standing up. “I can’t do this right now. It ain’t even you… I just…”

“You just what?”

Vanessa was shaking her head as she backed away. “You wouldn’t understand. Sometimes it’s better to not do enough than to do too much. That’s how you end up in this shit hole.”

[June 24th, 2019]

It was the dead of night, a time where – in many places – everything would be quiet and calm. But this was still Los Angeles in the early days of summer, when the weather was nice without the balmy heat making the air hazy, the kind of heat that made walking feel like trudging through a thick slime.

The ability to walk quickly and move nimbly was imperative for Vanessa and A’keria – down one from their usual trio with Silky away visiting family in Mississippi. It would’ve taken a lot more than that to quash Vanessa’s plans.

“You have got to be fucking kidding me. I swear to god, if the police don’t kill you, I will. It’s like you’re trying to invent a new level of stupid shit to try to get away with and—”

“Shh!” Vanessa elbowed her in the ribs. “We’ll get away with it if you shut the fuck up.” And with that, she had effectively tuned A’keria out as they kept walking to their destination. “Alright, this is it.”

A’keria hesitated. “You sure? Cause if it ain’t—”

“It is. Now, do you want the eggs or toilet paper?” She held up a carton of eggs in one hand and a roll of toilet paper in the other, offering up both options.

After a moment of disgruntled hesitation, A’keria sighed and grabbed the toilet paper. If Vanessa wasn’t going to come to her senses, she would at least pick the lesser of two evils on her end.

Of course, when the police arrived it didn’t really matter who was throwing what – vandalism was still vandalism. But Vanessa sat upright and indignant as she was escorted into the backseat of the cop car. Just as the car was pulling away, she stole a glance out the window, at the girl who had ignited the anger in her that drove her to revenge.

She looked indifferent – mildly annoyed at most. This infuriated Vanessa to no end. “Look at her, she don’t even care. What the fuck?”

The other girl sighed with her head against the window. “Now do you see how ridiculous you’ve been? You got your ass all worked up over some bitch that don’t give two shits about you. I keep telling you it’s gonna land you in a damn mess and look where we are now. We could catch a real charge for this, V.” She took a deep breath, willing herself to calm down. There was no point in them fighting on top of everything else. “Just once I wish you’d think things through before you act, channel that passion into something useful.”

“I’m sorry,” she mumbled. “Listen, I’ll take the whole rap for this. It was my fault – you tried to talk me out of it.”

A’keria shook her head with a soft smile. “Nah, they caught me red-handed too. Besides, we’re still ride-or-dies no matter how foolish you act.”

[Present Day]

“Hey… Vanessa, right? Do you mind if I ask you a question?”

Vanessa was undeniably caught off-guard when the hot, tattooed blonde that’d served her lunch plopped herself down beside her at the table. She blinked, taking a moment for her brain to connect to her mouth. “Um… Sure, what’s up?”

“You see that girl over there? With the blonde ponytail and the kicked puppy expression?” Kameron cocked her head in Brooke Lynn’s direction. “Every time I look at her, she’s looking at you. And I mean looking at you. So, I have got to know – is something going on between you two?”

That was the million-dollar question, wasn’t it? Vanessa looked down at the table for a good few moments before facing the girl who didn’t seem annoyed or jealous – just genuinely curious, which she supposed alleviated some of the anxiety the question could’ve caused. “You could say that,” was what she decided on. “But it’s complicated, you don’t want the whole backstory or nothing.”

Kameron chuckled, tucking her hair behind her ear. “Listen, I know complicated. And I know Brooke Lynn. I promise, nothing you could say about her would surprise me.”

It certainly wasn’t the response Vanessa was expecting, but it did explain the nonchalance Kameron had. “It’s not even her. I mean… it’s kind of her. But it’s me too. I got a… bad habit of getting real intense if I start to catch feelings, and she’s got this whole life to go back to, and I shouldn’t be mad at her for wanting to go back to her normal life…”

“So, what, she told you to fuck off back into the hood?”

Vanessa laughed, but it was a laugh filled with embarrassment and a hint of self-realization. “No… I just been avoiding talking to her about it since I’m, you know, real and emotional and shit, and she’s all closed off cause she’s a hornet.”

“Do you mean WASP?”

“Like it matters. It’s like we’re speaking different languages half the time anyway.”

Kameron tilted her head and pressed her lips together, going absolutely silent. In actuality, it wasn’t more than a minute or so, but with Vanessa unconsciously holding her breath, it felt like ages. “What if I go talk to her for you? You know, serve as a middleman or something.”

“Oh, no that’s not a— oh, okay, you already going. You ain’t even listening to me.” She hid her head in her arms on the table. “Well fuck me, I guess.” It wasn’t like the situation could get any more awkward, she figured.

Meanwhile, Kameron seemed as cheerful as she had been while serving food when she perched herself across from Brooke Lynn at the otherwise empty lunch table. “Long time no see, huh?”

[madphantom]

My writing progress

I've been writing since I was five, and decided to collect quick summaries of my literaric milestones from age five to age fifteen. Here they are:

AGE FIVE: "The lucky Dog" Once upon a time there was a dog called Laura. He always wanted to have luck. Two sentences and an illustration.

AGE NINE: "The Wolves of Blue Lake" A girl called Lena moves to a lake where a hyper dangerous pack of wolves is loose. Everyone in town has wolf bunkers. For the first few weeks everything is fine, but then the pack appears. Lena's family and the neighbours hide in the same bunker until a special unit of hunters arrives and kills the wolves. Featuring massive exaggeration since I'd just seen a documentary about a woman who was killed by a pack of wolves (I'm still scared of them, by the way!). Five pages.

AGE TEN: "The Ghost of Greystone Castle" A really annoying teen girl called Sally has to spend the vacation at her aunt's castle with her disabled cousin Balthazar. Soon they notice some weird stuff going on. Also a woman called Laura Winterbone disappears. A ghost called Clemens appears to Sally and Balthazar and tells them where Laura is (she was kidnapped). Clemens then magically comes alive again, marries Balthazar's mother and becomes an awesome uncle. Featuring a lot of awkwardness and a drastic change of personality as soon as it's necessary for the plot. Thirty-six pages and two illustrations.

AGE TWELVE: "Murderous Magic" A young mortal detective called Carol helps a vampire called Rip Mav escape from prison because she believes that he is innocent. Hours later another detective called Laura is dead. Main suspect is Rip. Carol still thinks he's innocent and they team up with an elf called Vanessa to find the real killer. Turns out an old friend of Rip killed a couple people including Laura and framed the vampire for it. Featuring a main character who behaves like a pedophile.

AGE FOURTEEN: "Tredecim" A trio of magicians chases a demon named Phobos. One of them, Nemo, lost her boyfriend Clarence because Phobos possessed him and she wants to bring him back at all costs. They manage to trap Phobos inside a hamster and bring back Clarence. Featuring a ton of unnecessary violence. Ninety pages.

AGE FIFTEEN: "Victor Chandelier" My current project. Two girls called Kelsie and Megs move into an allegedly haunted house. Soon they find out that the ghost is just a guy called Victor who faked his death. Kelsie falls in love with him. They adopt Victor's abused niece Tilly and live happily ever after until on Halloween Megs' crazy ex boyfriend burns down the house. My current project. Seventy pages.

[ashbarncs-blog]

[ dave franco, thirty one, male, he/him ] ━ hey, I just saw [ asher “ash” barnes ] walking down the streets of crownsville. they’ve lived in town for [ most of his life ], and you can catch them around town working as a [ professional boxer ]. I hear they’re known to be [ courageous & friendly ] and [ sarcastic & impatient ]. if asked, they would say their aesthetic would be [ bright smiles , bruises and scars on his body, ripped jeans, motorcycles].

Hello lovies! My name is Anna, I’m 21 and from the cst zone. I haven’t rped for quite a while now so I apologize if my writing sucks. Anyway I bring my moronic child Ash. Below the cut you’ll find some info about him and some connections suggestions. That being said, feel free to give this a like or hmu if you’d like to plot!♥

tw; bad parenting, mental illness, death . 

Originally from Dallas. Texas.

Is the first and only son of James and Vanessa Brosnan.

His father left not long after after Ash turned one year old.

After being left by her boyfriend/husband Vanessa realized she couldn’t raise a kid by herself so that’s when she contacted her parents. 

Thinking that their daughter asked fro their help because she wanted to keep continuing her studies and go to college they agreed to help her out. Ash would move in with them but Vanessa had to visit him every weekend.

So Ash was pretty much raised by his grandparents whom he called mom and dad.

Few years later his grandad was diagnosed with Alzheimer and at the age of 9 tragedy struck. His grandma died of a heart attack.

At the news Vanessa sent her father to a nursing home and decided to raise Ash by herself now that he was older. At the end she couldn’t do it.

She tried, but she was used to another type of lifestyle. The only thing she ever worried about was herself, she was used to her freedom and doing whatever she liked and going wherever she wanted to. Few months later, Ash was put in foster care.  

For four years he went from one family to another, never staying too long because there was always something wrong with him. And they weren’t wrong. The death of his grandma, and the fact that his parents apparently didn’t really want him, broke him. It made him feel that  no one would ever do.

So he went from being this friendly warm child to a distant, cold one. He didn’t interact with his foster brothers, he pushed everyone away and after being moved to different houses and group homes he realized that he had to toughen up if he wanted to survive. 

He became a problem child, he was skipping school, getting suspended and in fights. He had no respect whatsoever to his teachers. He simply stopped caring if he got in trouble or got yelled at. 

But that all changed when he turned 14, his social worker found him a new foster home in another state. It took him a while to let his walls down and trust his new family, but at the end everything worked out for Ash and a year later he got adopted.

A few months later after he arrived to Crownsville, he decided to practice boxing. At first it was a way to channel all the anger and frustration he had bottle dup for so long but as time passed he noticed that it was something he liked to do. 

Soon Asher had an amateur record of 50-4 and won the national Golden Gloves championship three years in a row (2004, 2005, 2006).

He won his first professional fight in 2006 when he knocked out his opponent on round 2. He quickly was praised from all corners of the boxing world was touted as a pugilistic prodigy.

Normally he lives in LA but visits Crownsville everytime he has a few free days.

Personality wise he’s very friendly and a goofball but can also be quite sarcastic sometimes. He’s a weird combination of Chandler Bing and Marshall Eriksen.

Most of the time he’s very Chandler-ish like making stupid coments and jokes and being sarcastic but when he’s around the people he cares about he turns into Marshall. He becomes this huge soft and sensitive man with quirky habits.

Also he may not be very much book smart but he makes up for it in the streets. Being in the foster system and all what he went though helped him to become street smart.

He might be friendly and approachable but he doesn’t let his walls down just with anyone, he doesn’t go around trusting everyone with his personal stuff. He’s very picky when it comes to choose whom to trust. 

Connections:

 I know it’s something everyone says at their intros but I’ll say it anyway: I want all of them! I definitely will take all the plots but if you need some ideas some suggestions are:  

Best friends ( because everyone needs their bestie around ) –––– pretty self explanatory, his ride or die, the Ted to his Marshall, the Joey to his Chandler. (1/2)

Highschool sweetheart / first love –––– could’ve ended on good or bad terms.

Exes (dramaaa) –––– It also could’ve ended on good or bad terms, but to be honest it would be fun to have one that ended on bad terms cause just imagine all the angst.

A fan –––– he’s a famous boxer now so maybe someone who knows about boxing and is a huge fan would be interesting 

One sided crush –––– he could be crushing on your character or the other way around, but it would be fun cause Ash sucks at flirting 

Wingman / wingwoman

Frenemies

Childhood friends –––– someone he was friends with when he lived in Dallas

Someone he met in one of his boxing matches –––– Maybe Asher could’ve met them when he visited their city for a box fight, who knows 

Trainer / Gym buddy –––– it could be his coach or it could be someone who he hangs at the gym with and exercise together. Like maybe this person helps him when he needs somenoe to train with when he’s in Crownsville.

One night stand –––– I’m thinking it could be the whole “i slept with you the other day and i didnt know we had a mutual friend and now we’re sitting across each other for brunch and it’s awkward because i ran out when you were asleep” situation

[faroutspaceman-blog]

My weekend so far. . 1/2 -1/4/19

My weekend starts off on Wednesday because quite frankly I can't remember what I did Monday or Tuesday. Those days are now non-existent. Forever lost in the trash bin of my deep ugly brain. Here I am laying on my bed, bored out of my fucking mind. I strum a lil guitar, sing a little, but put it back away because I realize I'm still as shit at guitar no less than I was 5 minutes before i picked it up. Now the only logical thing to do is sit and stare at my ceiling loudly moaning irritated grunts of boredom at my innocent ceiling. I get up and decide to make the most extravagant fucking sandwich. Well it was subpar, I usually put lettuce on it but we were out so I settled for a greenless burger. Whatever. I go to sit back on my bed and enjoy my sandwich, when I get a call. I fucking shoot up and tap that answer call like I just felt a rush of heroin in my blood. Thank the fucking lord. My brain almost had an aneurysm from how bored I was. My friend Vanessa and her Boyfriend (who happens to be my ex lover, love that..fuck) asks me if I wanna hang.

Me: "why yes I do want to chill, but if I'm still eating my sandwich by the time you pull up, your ass is waiting at the driveway."

Them: "we have Goldfish and Arnold Palmer's tea"

Me *while stuffing the whole sandwich in my mouth* : SAY NO MAS IM READY

I get on my new Blockbuster hoodie I bought the day before (yes from the world's only Blockbuster left in my Local Bend, Oregon.) And some jeans I found on the floor. I grabbed my keys and my bag and phone. Hiked up my driveway (which let me tell ya was a whole fucking mission in itself. ) Hall ass down my street I see Vanessa's car and they're driving like maniacs down my dirt road so I obviously take advantage of the situation and throw a peace sign into the air and lay in front of her car ready for my death. She stops and I hop in and am greeted with both my promised food items. I was very happy. We drive to a friend's house about a few miles from my house because we need to refill our pods with juice because ya know.. gotta get that nicotine rush. We had 8 full pods to last us the day. (They did not last for 3 people.)

After we fill our pods, we head down to Redmond, Oregon to the local 24 great Walmart to do what ever because we were bored, I decided to challenge my friends to a game of Hide n seek, and I was the only one who hid because they were being lame. I won it took them 40mins to find me. I was in the office supply Ile. After we went to Walmart, we went to Fred Meyers. stole their WiFi and lounged on their couches until it closed. Nothing special pretty boring.

Then Johnny, Vanessa's Boyfriend, gets the bright idea to swing by his house to see if his parents have packed up to leave to Idaho. If they are gone, Johnny plans to break into his own house ( I say break In because he just got kicked out.. again for refusing to be Mormon and for smoking and going against his parents) They are not gone yet so we decide to go to our chill spot which is way up on this hill where you can see all of Redmond. We talk, watch vines, etc.

Anyway I decide to go outside and look around, as I'm looking around Vanessa joins me. We are across from the car and we look around and I find this underwire leopard print bra a smashed TV and a lone boot. So I was already like "what the actual fuck happened here?"

I still forward towards the TV and there I see it, an empty grave, it looks fresh. I turn to Vanessa and she's already booked it back to the Car with me right behind her. We lock the doors and turn on Nextflix (we were watching Chappie).

Halfway through the movie, this man in a green Subaru pulls up next to our car. This is already fuckin weird because only few know about this road.he parks his car a lil ways from ours, cuts off his lights and just idles. At first were cautious but he just seemed to be doing the same we were, so our fear eventually subsided. We finished our movie, the car was still parked, and we pull out to check to see if Hunters parents had left. As we were pulling away we saw that the man had a blond haired woman in her car, but not to be rude she looked like a hooker. He was probably waiting for us to leave and we accidentally rang this man's bill up 200 an hour. Oops.

We checked Johnnys house. They're still there. Guess we're sleeping in the car tonight. We decide to try and find some food, we pull into Domino's and order a large pizza. As we're waiting for pizza, I joke able how I've cut my Cornea in the most retarted way to Vanessa's boyfriend. I move my hands to get the hair out of my face, and the string to my hoodie cuts my eye. At first I thought there was just something in my eye so I start rubbing it. It really fucking hurts. I close my eyes and black thinking it will go away but it never does. We drive back to the chill spot and on the way back, we see that green Subaru on the main Street leaving from our spot,but I saw no girl this time. Who knows we were gone a long fucking time. Must have dropped her off a few ways back. We get back in on the hill I manage my eye to keep the excess light out of it and my friends play Madea boo 2 on next. When the movie ends we decide to just go to sleep on the hill. I'm a little pissed at this point because I just wanted to chill and not murder my eyeball.

We put her back seat down and I'm on the far edge in the backseat wishing I never came because maybe if I stayed home this wouldn't of happened. Then there's a knock on the window. Not like an accidental hit it was clearly a knock. I dont say anything, it isn't acknowledged between any of us. I try and sleep and Johnny is freaking out

"dude are you fucking hearing this. It sounds like footsteps and dragging outside."

I don't hear shit so Ignore it. Then Vanessa starts hearing it. And I know she doesn't lie so I'm flipping my shit at this point. Vanessa jumps into front seat and She whips her car off the hill so fast we was cooking.

We end up driving back to Walmart to get me eyedrops in hope it'll make it better. As Vanessa is running in to get eyedrops, this girl stops us to ask if she can use her phone because her friends ditched her at Walmart ( what fuckin assholes. ) She waits away from our car for her friend, and she quickly comes back telling us that a man asked if she wanted a ride home and a smoke.we told her to wait with us because I was suspicious that it was the man in the green Subaru.

Vanessa's comes back with the eyedrops and we leave the parking lot without the girl. I strangely don't remember saying goodbye to her but we did apparently? We park in the neighborhood and get back into the backseat of the car. We play never have I ever until 4 am. We fall asleep and wake up at 6:30 am. I'm still asleep I. The back seat when I hear Johnny's happy that his parents are gone, he tries to look for ways back into his house but it's a no bueno. They drives to lowes while I pretend to be asleep on the backseat of the car. All I heard was lockpick and Saw and I already knew someshit was about to happen.

They park back at Johnny's house and I stay in the car. About 10 minute later Johnny comes back In the car and yells "we got it". Sweet so the lock picked worked? Nope they sawed a hole in the backdoor. He is for sure going back to jail after this. Vanessa guides me inside because I'm blind and can't see. We sit on the couch i call an eye doctor in bend and make an appointment for 4pm, for Johnny's uncle that happens to coincidentally be an eye doctor. He lives a block away from Johnny. Around 12 pm. We leave Johnny's house and go look for other things to do I. The area.

We pull into this Freshman's driveway,(Tom) and lets get this straight, Tom is fucking annoying and no one likes him because he is a fein for pods and nicotine, that and he thinks he's tough shit. Proud why he got excelled. We've had to help him with every fight he's been in. Trash.

We chill at his house for a while, and eventually his step mom walks in and kicks us out "get out of my house, I don't like kids having sex on my couch"

Honestly we just came over to steal his food. His step mom is such a joke. She has the biggest crush on our friend Jason. We could honestly break apart that whole marriage and cause such a scandle with that information. Anyway it's about 2pm now, my appointment is in two hours. We drive to the park and wait.

5 minutes later Tom skates to us on his long board, asks if he can hang and throws his board I the trunk.

Fuck. Just when I thought I was gonna get away from this kid. We drive by away from the park and go towards bend for my appointment. The whole car ride he blows his burnt vape in my fave and it smells like ass. I asked him to stop. He didn't. We stop at the grocery, I stay in the car, while Tom takes a smoke break out the car while Johnny and Vanessa shop. 3 minutes pass and he asks if I want a smoke.

"no that shits nasty"

"come-on. They don't even taste like stogies. They smell soo good*

He shoves the pack of cigs in my face and I was getting pissed. The only way to get rid of his prized cigs is to threaten his prized cigs.

"if you don't get that shit out of my face rn, I swear I'll rip them all up then spit on them"

"I'll beat ur ass if you do"

I just smirked at him as he took his cigs back and closed the door.

It's about 3:45 and we head to my appointment. Vanessa directs me to the office. And it's so bright in there, I instantly start crying which makes my eyes hurt even more. I honestly have never wanted to just instantly die in a moment than now. I just want to stop hurting. I'm finally able to open my eyes and the office by is actually very nice. I fill out the paperwork and the doctor sees me right away.

I try and play it smooth, talking about how broke I am, and how much I love Jonny so he'll give me a discount be because I don't have health Insurance.

Then he says "be in remember you, we played ping pong at Johnny's house during their Mormon party."

I had flashbacks to the Mormon party, and how we won the game, how I almost fucked Johnny in his car afterwards on the way back home. But it felt wrong because Vanessa was there. Then I remembered the hole in the back door.

"yeah that was really fun. I remember we won."

He didn't day anything he just put numbing drops In My eyes and this yellow dye. He looked at my eyes and said

"you have a 3 millimeter cut on your eye. You really did some damage"

"dammit"

He writes my prescription and im ngl I almost booked it out the door. But I waited instead. He me 120 for a 2 minute visit. Asshole. After I talked so nicely with him.

Me and Vanessa went back outside but the car was gone, so was Tom and Johnny.

We called them, they're a block or two away. We waited and waited, and entertained ourselves by kicking rocks to each other that made the best ear tingling noise you could imagine.

A couple minutes later the car pulled up and this girl other girl was in the car. Wtf man I just want to go home. As soon as we get into the car everyone is aguing about where we're going and Johnny wants to Trade My weed for pods.that he didn't even ask me if he could be trade. Which pissed me off A SHIT TON. johnny, Tom and this dumb dumb bitch kept arguing about pods and juuls. I realized how absolutely fucking retarted it is and how I never want to sound like that. I save all my shit to Johnny and just said " I quit" . We drove into Safeway gave them my perscription. Told us to come back in 20 minutes. Dropped dumb bitch off at her friends no house. Johnny traded my Weed for pods. And Tom proceeded to cuss out girl we traded with calling her names like fat ass, which I did not approve of. Tom commented on something and I swear I almost killed a kid in front of my friends. Tom was lucky that night. I would have strangled him if it wasn't for my eye.

We go back to Safeway and they try and charge me $47 for a $4 perscription. Fuck that. We transfer it to Walmart. We drive home, I'm the first to get dropped off. Thank fucking god.

My mom comes into my room, and hugs me and just listens to me sleepily jabber about anything.

Last time I'll ever sacrifice my subpar sandwich for goldfish and Arnold Palmer's.

Never again

[roryxbeaumont]

Again, this is Helen bringing her second hoe, Sienna!  A bit about heris down below and I’d love to plot relationships out for her. A PSA, she is the worst rip and basically you’ll ever love or hate her, there’s no in between.  Again,  DM me or like this and I’ll message you <3

༻῾¦، *      (   MADELAINE PETSCH   .   ) ↷ uh oh ! looks like SIENNA FITZGERALD'S love letters were leaked. haven’t you heard ? the TWENTY year old MODEL apparently received love letters from VANESSA MORGAN, JOE KEERY, VICTORIA JUSTICE, ARIANA GRANDE, TOM HOLLAND, ANY FC, her SCHOOL RIVAL. i’ve heard that they can be OBNOXIOUS, but can be CAPTIVATING on a good day. rumor has it, they were ON A PHOTOSHOOT during the letter outbreak. (   CIS FEMALE, SHE/HER .   )   /   (   HELEN   ,  21 ,   SHE/HER   ,   GMT+1   .   )

Sienna Fitzgerald is the middle child of the Fitzgerald clan, having two siblings older than her and another two younger and she was born and raised in White Oak. Her mother was a socialite, coming from old money and the redhead has never known her to have a ‘real’ job, spending her time at home looking after the five siblings.  Although her father was busy being a doctor, she was very attached to her dad growing up. He is one of the huge reasons why she is the way she was since she had him wrapped around his finger since a child. 

Grew up being quite spoiled and stuck up- meaning she easily can rub people up the wrong way.  She was also amazing at getting what she wanted, whenever she wanted. Even in her first day at preschool, she managed to be the most popular, treating the rest of her classmates like they were her servants. Over time, she’s become slightly less in your face about it, though she knows that she is the best and that ’s not going to change any time soon, to her anyway. 

Sienna was never really good in school, it just never was something that interested her. She got average grades, never really trying but never really being the bottom. Her reason for attending was to be able to keep being on the cheerleading squad,  her one and only motivation. It was at a young age when she got her first ‘boyfriend’, a boy in the year above her in school. With her charm, she found herself able to use anyone to get what she needed, just by battering her eyelids. 

She really grew into her looks by the time she turned thirteen and decided she wanted to be a model to start off with. It was obvious that Sienna was meant to be a star from a young age, she just revelled in the attention and worked it well. Her mother wasn’t her biggest supporter, knowing how difficult it would be for her to do it, especially since she was living in a small town.

After two years of developing her career, her agent managed to get her into a fashion show last minute, walking for Dior a few weeks after her sixteenth birthday. It kickstarted her career, leading to her now walking for different fashion weeks for different brands.

When she was fourteen, she begun to realise that she was attracted to both men and woman, finding both just as attractive as the other. Though she had spent most of her years before ‘dating’ guys, she got herself into a relationship for six months with a girl when she was 15, breaking up when she realised she was catching actual feelings. That was not on for Sienna, knowing that her career was the most important part for her so she swore off actual relationships. Since then she’s been having one nights stands or just a few week relationships, not wanting to actually commit. 

A year into professional modelling, she decided to quit high school, spending her Senior Year being tutored whenever she didn’t have photoshoots. She graduated with a 3.8 GPA so not great but not too bad either. To her, it just wasn’t as important for her, especially with the world feeling like it was at her fingertips. 

With White Oak being not so far to travel to LA and other cities for modelling, she’s decided for now to stay in White Oak when she’s not working. Needing to be away from her crowded family house, she rents a nice apartment in the nice part of town so she gets a little bit of peace and quiet. 

Last year, her parents separated which was absolutely devastating for the girl. She’d always loved how happy her parents seemed to be and how she looked like she came from the perfect family. To her, it seemed like they were letting her down, ruining her career by creating drama not involving her? It was even more of a surprise when Sienna found out that her mum was seeing Brook’s mom and the two really hit it off. It’s become apparent just how soon it seems to be going and she may actually have step-siblings as it seems both are interested in marriage once the divorce comes through. 

Personality wise….she’s far from the nicest person. Fame certainly came to her head and now she’s got a very Katherine Pierce and Cheryl personality in terms of being rather rude and conceited to most other than a select few. She only puts on an act to people who can help her career. She’s also extremely flirtatious- having no preference of gender. Recently there’s been a lot of paparazzi pictures of her leaving clubs drunk, with men or woman.

RIVAL- Though not plotted out yet, her rival at school was the person she received her love letters from. The two were competition for the other, though there was always a bit of sexual tension between the two that was never acted on. The two have a semi-hostile relationship, for now anyway. Sienna is still working out how to exactly bring up the love letter. 

Connections I’d looooveee to have are:

Her first love and ex-girlfriend- the two were a couple for six months when they were fifteen and were both very into each other.  Sienna really liked her and suddenly dumped her out the blue when she realised she was actually getting the feels for her and was actually becoming a more decent person?

Siblings- either older and younger though there’s five of them in total and up for all any any sort of relationship

BFF- her ride and die, someone she’s been bestie’s with this person since they were both young and yeah just a relatively good bitchy bestie who she loves deep down

I’d also love exes, unrequited loves, people she used to be the worst to and more! 

[tabloidtoc]

National Enquirer, June 3

Cover: TV’s 25 Most Hated Stars 

Page 2: Hayden Panettiere still with boyfriend Brian Hickerson even after he was arrested for domestic violence 

Page 3: Alex Trebek’s hair is gone but not his hope 

Page 4: Ellen DeGeneres has gone overboard with cosmetic touch-ups in a botched attempt to save her dicey marriage to Portia de Rossi, Miley Cyrus’ girl-on-girl flirting with ex Stella Maxwell is fueling rumors that she and new husband Liam Hemsworth have an open marriage 

Page 5: Cate Blanchett leaves broke and disabled brother to struggle alone, bitter Wendy Williams has spent $300,000 and counting to ensure her estranged husband gets as little as possible in their divorce 

Page 6: Looks like Mark Wahlberg and wife Rhea Durham will soon be parents of five, overworked Carrie Underwood snubs her husband, scared kids beg 80-lb Angelina Jolie to eat 

Page 7: Fired Steve Harvey raging war on replacements Kelly Clarkson and Melissa McCarthy 

Page 8: Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick celebrated their 22nd anniversary with a huge public blowout on the streets of London over how much time they spend apart

Page 9: Prince Charles’ links to a pedophile priest have plunged the royal family into a fresh sex abuse crisis 

Page 10: Hot Shots -- Kevin Hart and Eniko Parrish, Brad Paisley, Vanessa Hudgens 

Page 11: CNN’s new headquarters are an utter disaster, Sara Gilbert quit The Talk to save her rocky marriage to musician Linda Perry 

Page 12: Straight Shuter -- Neil Patrick Harris, Billy Bush fears he’ll blow his second chance hosting Extra Extra because A-list celebrities won’t talk to him, hermit-like diva Cher had no idea wireless earbuds exist, Madonna hopes to follow Bruce Springsteen who had a year-long, sold out residency at a Broadway theater with less than 1,000 seats, fashion insiders are concerned about Kimora Lee Simmons after her Big Apple chat with industry icon Fern Mallis was canceled

Page 13: The Kardashians are in panic mode over reclusive brother Rob, smitten Taylor Swift wants to set down roots with boyfriend Joe Alwyn in his hometown of London, the updated BH90210 is a satire focusing on what would happen if the actors got together to film a revival of the ‘90s FOX hit and spoofed their real-life selves 

Page 14: True Crime 

Page 15: Howard Stern confesses he’s in therapy to overcome his narcissism and regrets ripping into celebrities 

Page 16: Bill Murray’s face has been wrecked by potentially deadly psoriasis, Adam Levine is a diva who aggravated onlookers with his bratty behavior during an appearance in NYC 

Page 17: Jonnie Jonckowski’s steamy fling with Neil Diamond sparked his split from his second wife leading to a blockbuster $150 million divorce payout, Tiger Woods is being sued over the drunk-driving death of a 24-year-old bartender who worked at his Florida restaurant The Woods 

Page 20: Cover Story -- 25 TV stars we love to hate -- Rosie O’Donnell, Kris Jenner, Kim Kardashian, Meghan McCain, Farrah Abraham 

Page 21: Alec Baldwin, Kate Gosselin, Megyn Kelly, Katherine Heigl, Rush Limbaugh, NeNe Leakes 

Page 22: Gordon Ramsay, Joy Behar, Lindsay Lohan, Jussie Smollett, Teresa Giudice, Josh Duggar, Ann Coulter 

Page 23: Lori Loughlin, Bill Maher, Matt Lauer, Roseanne Barr, Ryan Lochte, Rachael Ray, Scott Baio 

Page 25: How to head off a heart attack, 80% of readers say Archie is no name for a royal 

Page 26: Health Watch 

Page 29: The camper Dana Plato died in is for sale, devastated by the deaths of her parents Paula Abdul is launching a Las Vegas residency to jump-start her career and her life 

Page 32: Wedding bells for Rami Malek and Lucy Boynton, Rihanna seems ready to reconnect with abusive ex Chris Brown, Hollywood Hookups -- Kathie Lee Gifford’s son Cody to wed actress Erika Brown, Hilary Duff is engaged to Matthew Koma 

Page 36: Tim Conway’s dying regret, Doris Day took steamy secrets to the grave 

Page 42: Red Carpet Stars & Stumbles -- Millie Bobby Brown, Olivia Wilde, Julianne Hough, Naomi Scott 

Page 45: Spot the Differences -- Prince William and Kate Middleton 

[artificialqueens]

losing all my cool (branjie, oneshot) - holtzmanns

Here's a oneshot full of headassery to tide you all over until the next multichap. Thank you all SO much for all the support that you send my way both on AO3 and here about my fics. It makes me so happy and really motivates me to keep writing more. So, this exists because of you, in a way. 

 Writ is the bestest beta and friend and cheerleader in the world and I love them. Also the title of this fic is from Cool by Dua Lipa. 

 NOTE: The mug bit at the end - you'll know when you reach it - is inspired by a scene in a ghostbusters fanfic that I read years ago. So. Just wanted to make it clear that I can't take credit for that idea. That being said, enjoy!

Brooke Lynn Hytes is a lesbian. A premium cut, 100% Canadian beef hunk of lesbian, and everyone knows it.

Brooke wouldn’t necessarily say that it’s a big factor of her personality, per se. She just makes sure that it’s abundantly clear for any potential ladies around her to catch on. Plus, she fucking rocks a good beanie, oversized shirt, jeans, and docs combo and really, who wouldn’t know it from looking at her? Having a flashing neon sign above her head reading ‘GAY’ would probably be a little bit more subtle.

Despite the blatant display of her sexual orientation, it’s been awhile since Brooke has dated anyone seriously - a year and a half, to be exact. The time since has been a lament of Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge, swiping right and left but not really ever clicking with anyone. Going out to the village but not really seeing anyone past a second date, because none of them really feel right.

Who would have thought that the dating scene in the city would have such slim pickings after awhile? Brooke feels like she’s wading through the same bunch of faces that she’s already seen before, way too many girls that have dated her exes or are her exes and really, she’s tired of it.

It’s a hard dilemma to explain to her friends, too, all of them either in long term relationships and happy or straight and having a way easier time finding guys for themselves. They don’t get the lesbian dating struggle.

“These apps are so dry. I’m going to be seventy years old and attending aquafit classes before someone pops up who’s going to actually catch my interest.” Brooke doesn’t mean for her words to come out in a muffled groan, but it’s hard for them not to when her face is buried in her hands.

“Aw, don’t be like that, B.” A’keria’s sympathetic hand reaches out to pat her shoulder, and it’s a little comforting, but not that much, not when A’keria’s other hand is busy texting her man. “You’re a catch.”

“I know I am. Problem is, I can’t find anyone else who is too.” Brooke shoves a forkful of pad thai in her mouth as she shrugs.

They really did all luck out, working in the same plaza. Brooke loves being able to catch up with the friends she’s made over lunch, Nina coming over from her bakery and Monique and Monet from their boutique and A’keria, Silky, and Vanessa from their salon. Having food options never hurts, either.

Brooke hears a snort as she takes a sip of her water, and looks up to see Vanessa rolling her eyes across from her, shaking her head.

“What?”

“You are so full of yourself, miss thing.”

Brooke shrugs, sprinkling more peanuts over her food. “I know my worth. A little bit of self confidence never hurts anyone.”

“Apparently, it hurts your dating life.” Vanessa grins, raising an eyebrow, and Brooke can’t help but pout.

“Hey! You don’t get the struggle. It’s harder when you date girls.”

It’s true. Straight people have it better. Straight people can pick each other up off the street, in the line for Starbucks. Straight people never have to wonder about if someone they’re into is also like them, if they’re even remotely interested. Straight people never have to look for smoke signals from potential people to date as clues. So Brooke’s not saying that Vanessa hasn’t been through it like she has when it comes to dating, but she’s also not not saying it.

Besides, Vanessa’s taking a break from dating, anyway. At least, that’s what she’d told their group after she’d broken up with her last boyfriend a few months ago. That she needs to go back and find herself or something.

Vanessa, though, seems unperturbed as she clacks her acrylic nails on the table. “Is it, now? Tell me, Brooke. Tell me about your struggle being a lady Casanova.”

“Okay, now you’re just making fun of me.” Brooke sniffs, leaning back in her chair.

It’s fine, really. She’ll find a girl eventually.

Maybe before she’s seventy.

If Brooke is the world’s most obvious lesbian, Vanessa is the world’s most incognito bisexual.

To most people, at least. Sure, Silky and A’keria know that Vanessa had dated some girls back in college, that her Tinder is set to both guys and girls. But everyone else?

Vanessa hasn’t seen the point of revealing it yet. What’s the rush, if she’s not dating a girl anyway?

Nor is she dating a guy right now either, but that’s beside the point.

Vanessa gets how she’s perceived. Face always beat, hair always styled, an aesthetic that’s femme as hell. Long ass nails, because why wouldn’t she get acrylics if she’s not getting coochie anytime soon? She looks good, but she also understands why she has had to be the one to hit on girls in the past, rather than the other way around. Because they always think that she’s a heterosexual.

And here Brooke is, doing the same thing. Not that Vanessa is interested in her - she needs a little bit more time with herself before dating again, especially after the drama of her last boyfriend. All she needs in bed is her rabbit toy, and it gives more pleasure than she’s gotten from her last two partners put together.

But she knows how Brooke sees her - straight, because Brooke’s playing into her own stereotypes about how girls interested in other girls look, how they act. Brooke would be the last person to guess that Vanessa’s bisexual, that she enjoys going down on a girl just as much as she does. Brooke, sweet lumberjack Brooke in her ripped jeans and her plaid as if she’s about to go chop a tree down with her nonexistent biceps. Classic lesbian, practically begging to be messed with.

And Vanessa has an idea. It comes to her as she’s walking back to the salon with Silky and A’keria after their lunch break, their friend group dispersing towards their respective businesses around the plaza. Vanessa finds it hilarious that Brooke’s a ballet teacher, going over releves and arabesques while looking like she can’t lift her own leg over her own head in those jeans. Though Vanessa knows she can, from one too many drunk nights out when Brooke’s old ballet dancer persona shines through as they stumble from the bars.

“You’re gonna what now?” Silky’s brows are furrowed, her eyes slightly squinting - partly from the sun, partly because she doesn’t seem to be following Vanessa’s train of thought.

Vanessa pats her arm as they swing open the salon doors once more. “I’m gonna confuse the shit out of Brooke. Shove all of her sapphic stereotypes up her ass.”

“As if she wouldn’t like that.” A’keria snorts, and Vanessa groans.

“Nasty. Point is, bitch has no clue I’m into ladies too. So, it’s time for me to get in her head. Make her reconsider how she sees other people.”

“How you gonna do that? Hytes is sharp. She’ll figure out something stupid in no time.”

Silky has a point. How can Vanessa fool Brooke in a way that won’t make her figure out what exactly is going on?

Except Vanessa, despite her normal state of being a bull in a china shop, does know subtlety, especially when it comes to displaying signals.

Which means she knows just how to get under Brooke’s skin.

The beanie from the top shelf of Vanessa’s dresser feels weird on her head the next morning. It’s one that she hasn’t pulled out since her college days when she had been trying to figure out her personal style and what suited her. Vanessa’s not mad at it, though, as she looks in the mirror. She’s still curled her hair and she’s still wearing heels but the button down she’s wearing with her sleeves rolled up is miles away from her normal aesthetic.

Not that she doesn’t rock it.

“Phase one, ladies.” Vanessa strides into the salon with a swing in her step, a coffee in each hand. Her first client isn’t coming in for another forty five minutes, but she’s here early for a reason.

“One of those for me?” Silky holds a hand out but Vanessa’s quick to lift the cup high in the air, out of her grasp.

“No can do. This one’s for someone in that dance studio four doors down. You know exactly who.”

Brooke’s fiddling with her phone, swiping through songs that play on the overhead speakers as the dancers in her studio warm up on the hardwood floor. Vanessa has to hold back a flinch at the way the dancers bend in half, pull their legs up higher than they ever naturally should be.

“Morning, Brooke!” Vanessa’s voice is faux cheerful, a smile on her face to hide the way she already wants to crack up.

“Morn!” Brooke’s none the wiser as she puts her phone down on the speaker system, turns around to face Vanessa before she pauses, eyes wide.

Bingo.

Vanessa can feel Brooke’s eyes trail up and down her frame as she hands Brooke her coffee. “You good? Looking a little spaced out there.”

“What? Yeah, I’m good.” Brooke sputters, taking a sip of her coffee to mask it but Vanessa catches it, of course she does. “What’s the coffee for?”

“Oh, no reason.” Vanessa shrugs, leaning against the wall. “Just thought I’d grab one for you, that’s all.”

“That’s, uh-very nice of you.” Brooke’s eyes are still as wide as saucers, and Vanessa has to hold back a snicker, because she’s so easy. “I like the beanie. Never seen you in one before.”

“Yeah?” Vanessa reaches up, fiddles with it, as if she hasn’t noticed it today at all. “Found this old thing in my closet and my hair was a mess this morning. Figured I’d bring it back, y’know?”

Sure, it’s a lie. Vanessa’s hair is meticulously styled as always, but Brooke doesn’t need to know that.

“Sure.” Brooke pauses on her words before continuing. “That shirt, too. It’s a nice one.”

Vanessa crosses her arms, the rolled up sleeves along her forearms showing off the simple black watch on her wrist. “Yeah? Didn’t think you ever liked what I wear. Or that you ever paid attention to my outfits. But it’s nice to know that you do.”

Checkmate.

Vanessa turns on her heels towards the door before Brooke gets to say another word, turning back towards Brooke as she’s about to step out. Brooke’s eyes are still on her, a crease in her brows, and Vanessa has never wanted to crack up harder.

“See you at lunch, Brooke.”

Lunch feels like it’s hours away, and it doesn’t stop V from fiddling with excitement throughout her morning appointments. The moment she gets to drop her styling shears and comb on her table is a relief, because it means that it’s time to execute the next part of her plan.

A’keria had originally made a face this morning when Vanessa had roped her into it, but Vanessa knows that she’s going to come through. Because A’keria is reliable like that.

Vanessa’s halfway through her dynamite rolls, but she feels like she has to scarf them down before the shenanigans unfold. She can’t focus on the conversations being held at their table, even though Monique’s story about their ridiculous customer from the morning is pretty funny. Especially because Brooke keeps peeking over at her while she picks at her tempura, which Vanessa catches because Brooke’s never been this quiet during their daily lunches before, so lost in thought with her brow furrowed.

Vanessa nudges A’keria beside her, their little signal. A’keria sighs a little before nodding, reaching for her phone, dialing Vanessa’s number. Just as they’ve planned.

Vanessa has to keep a snicker from getting out as Pussy Is God by King Princess starts blaring from her phone, because what better ringtone to choose for a scheme like this? Brooke’s head snaps up almost immediately, her eyes darting around the table to look for the source, and Vanessa takes the opportunity to stand up, hold out her phone.

“Gotta take this one, guys. I’ll be back, though!”

Vanessa has to try her hardest to not turn back, not peek at Brooke’s expression as she heads for the hallway with the sushi restaurant’s bathrooms, where she can answer A’keria’s fake call. “Thanks, bitch! I owe you one.”

“You really fucking do-”

Vanessa hangs up before A’keria’s done her sentence, and she can’t resist doing a twirl in front of the bathroom mirror, almost wanting to pat herself on the back. Because everything is unfolding exactly as planned.

She touches up her lipstick, dusts some more highlighter on her cheeks because she’s in front of a mirror, anyway, waiting for the time to pass. She watches the minutes tick by on her watch, and it’s hard, really, not to run outside right away, to see what Brooke’s face looks like at this very moment.

Kiki: what u got massive diarrhea in there or some shit

Kiki: come out already

Okay, maybe Vanessa should be waiting less than fifteen minutes.

It’s worth it, though, when she traipses out, sits right back down across from Brooke at the table, especially when Brooke’s face has about a million questions written across it.

“Sorry for leaving like that.” Vanessa holds out her phone, shrugs as she picks up her chopsticks once more. “Call from my ex, they’re in town. Wanted to catch up.”

“Oh?” Brooke’s face perks up in the most predictable way, and it’s exactly what Vanessa wants. Excellent.

Vanessa’s as cool as a cucumber on the outside, though. Quite an actress.

“Mhm.” Vanessa nods, grabbing an edamame bean as she does. “Think I’m gonna make plans with them for later this week. Our breakup was pretty chill.”

Brooke leans forward in her seat, ever so slightly. Just as she should. “What happened with you two?”

“We were just better off as friends.” Vanessa shrugs. “One of those people you still vibe with, y’know?”

“Sure…” Brooke trails off, tilting her head ever so slightly. “What did you say their name was again?”

“I didn’t.” Vanessa grins before standing up, tapping her watch with her other hand. “Though it’s almost one. Lunch is over, y’all.”

The corresponding groans echoing from the table, mostly from Monet, are worth it when Vanessa peeks at Brooke’s gobsmacked face.

She loves throwing her for a loop.

Brooke’s going to go insane. She really is. It feels like she’s in an alternate universe, where things are just not quite right, or maybe she’s been blind this whole time to it until now, but-

There’s something up with Vanessa.

It had started simple enough to be a coincidence. Vanessa in a button down shirt and a beanie. Sure, not her usual style, but we all experiment now and then. But then Vanessa’s ringtone had blared and it had been a fucking King Princess song, and she’d talked about an ex when she usually never does. Brooke had been listening, she really had, to see if she had been talking about a guy because, well…Vanessa’s straight, right?

But Brooke hadn’t been able to tell, and she’s still not sure. Because from how vague Vanessa was, she could have easily been talking about a girl or a nonbinary ex, for all that Brooke knows. But would Vanessa date someone who’s not a guy?

Brooke has no idea, and the mystery is killing her. Because Vanessa’s not gay. She can’t be. Can she?

Brooke needs to find out.

It’s a little while before Brooke sees Vanessa again, mostly because she has brainstorming lunch meetings with Detox before her friend begins to work on her dancers’ costumes before their spring showcase. It’s only for a few days, but Brooke feels like she’s going nuts, like she needs to investigate more or she’s going to lose it.

Detox notices, from the way her eyebrows are raised as she sits across from Brooke at her makeshift office in the studio. “Got ants in your pants, or something?”

“Detox.” Brooke rests her elbows on the table, leans forward slightly. “How good is your gaydar?”

“Gaydar isn’t a thing, dumbass. Straight people invented that.” Detox snorts. “If it was real, I’d be way better at hitting on the gay girls instead of the straight ones.”

“You just have a type, and that type is ‘not interested,’ apparently.” Brooke winks at Detox when her eyebrows raise. “Don’t forget, I was there all throughout undergrad when you’d cry in the bathroom after another straight girl turned you down.”

“Undergrad was traumatic. Don’t remind me.” Detox shudders, before holding out her hand. “I won in the end, though.”

Brooke fakes gagging upon seeing Detox’s shiny bling on her ring finger, as if she doesn’t want a girl for herself, too. “Don’t remind me. We know you’re married.”

“You’re just jealous of how cute we are. Now tell me, which girl has gotten your panties in a tizzy?”

“Tizzy-no, she hasn’t gotten them in a tizzy. Gross.” Brooke makes a face. “It’s one of the girls in the salon over there. I thought I had her figured out, but…”

“But now your signals are crossed?” Detox looks delighted, a little too delighted, by Brooke’s plight.

“But now my signals are crossed.” Brooke sighs, leans her cheek on her hand. “What straight girl likes King Princess?”

Detox shrugs. “I dunno. She’s getting kinda mainstream now, isn’t she? I swear I heard her play on the radio once. I think you gotta keep investigating, Sherlock Holmes. Find out more.”

Brooke gets her chance to do just that when Nina texts their group chat to make a plan for drinks after work on a Friday afternoon. She’s never said yes faster because she knows Vanessa is going to come, which means that Brooke will have the chance to dig a little deeper.

The bar that they choose is blaring tunes on their overhead speakers, making it hard for Brooke to hear anything aside from the bass of the latest top forty song, but she leans in nonetheless over the table Because Nina is bringing up plans for Pride this year, and Brooke’s especially interested in the answers of one specific person.

Vanessa’s wearing Doc Martens and the sight had been disconcerting when they’d walked into the bar, because Brooke’s never seen her without heels. The plaid shirt tied around her waist is taunting Brooke, confusing her even more because it’s the type of shirt that Brooke herself would wear. She’d never thought that she’d have anything in common with Vanessa’s style in the past, though evidently, her closet has some exceptions.

“I’m thinking we can hit up Garage and O’Grady’s for sure. Crews is going to be too busy during Pride, it’s packed to the brim on a good day.” Nina has her notes app open as she makes their itinerary, and it almost makes Brooke want to crack up, how organized she is.

“What about The Drink? Shouldn’t be as crowded there, either.”

Brooke’s head pops up from her appetizer of mozzarella sticks to see who’s given the suggestion of one of her favourite venues - it’s not A’keria, who’s on her phone, not Monique or Monet, who’d both disappeared to the bathroom together ages ago. It’s Vanessa, leaning forward expectantly to peek at the list on Nina’s phone, and Brooke feels like she’s about to do a spit take.

How has Vanessa heard of The Drink? Brooke would get it if Vanessa’s heard of the popular gay bars in the village, the one that straight people tend to go to more often than not, but The Drink?

“You’ve been there before?” Brooke can’t help but internally curse at herself when the words slip out of her mouth but she can’t help it, because she’s more confused than ever.

Vanessa’s eyes are sparkling just a little too much, and it’s making Brooke’s head hurt, just a little. “One of my fave spots. Why, wanna go there sometime, B?”

Brooke doesn’t miss the way Silky snickers into her nachos, and she has to run her fingers through her hair, rub her temples a bit to clear her head. “I’ve been there plenty.”

“I’m sure you have, but that wasn’t my question.” Vanessa raises an eyebrow as she takes a sip of her drink.

Brooke pauses, because she can’t understand what Vanessa means with her statement, unless…

“Wait, are you asking me out?”

“You wish.”

And Vanessa’s winking at her, turning towards Silky and A’keria, and Brooke’s going to go grey, really, if everything keeps going on like this.

Vanessa’s having fun. Way too much fun. Enough that she’s going to be laughing about it for weeks, because getting under Brooke’s skin has never been so entertaining.

Brooke is lost. Dazed and confused. Vanessa’s plan is working out perfectly, because Brooke already seems to have been turned on her head, not quite sure what is going on anymore. Vanessa almost wants to take pity on her, reveal her ruse, that no shit she’s also into women. But it’s fun watching Brooke struggle a little bit as she tries to figure it out.

When Monique texts their group chat a day later that it’s been too long and she needs to go out before she absolutely loses her mind, Vanessa jumps to say yes. Because she knows Brooke’s going to come too, and she can pull another fast one on her.

Kameron’s quick to agree when Vanessa texts her about it, saying yes before even hearing the full story, but calling Vanessa nonetheless.

“You want me to-”

“Help me pull a stunt on my pal. Just be at the club around eleven tonight.”

“You’re a crazy bitch, and I love it.” Kameron’s laughing into the phone, and Vanessa knows she has her intrigued. “I’ll be there.”

Vanessa’s back in an off the shoulder top and tight skirt for their night out, because sure, they’re going to a lesbian bar, but a part of her has missed her own style. Besides, she’s not trying to pick up anybody tonight, anyway. She’s just trying to get the attention of one specific person.

A’keria and Silky slam their shot glasses down at the bar, and if this were any other night, Vanessa would join them, even though she’s the lightweight of the group. But she’s keeping her eyes peeled, listening to Nina and Brooke talk about their current Netflix obsession as she waits for Kameron to show up and set her plan in motion.

Kameron sits herself down at the end of the bar, and the way she chugs from her beer bottle, muscles flexing, is already making girls turn towards her, trying to bat their eyes at her.

Vanessa knows that Kameron’s more than whipped for her girlfriend, Asia, that she doesn’t really have eyes for anybody else. Which makes the way she pretends to check Vanessa out hilarious, with a smile cast towards her that must have worked well on Asia back in the day. Vanessa wastes no time in winking back, and by the time the bartender slides a drink to her (‘compliments of the lady at the end of the bar’) Vanessa’s already slid off her barstool, meandering over to where Kameron is sitting.

“So who’s the one you’re trying to get the attention of?” Kameron’s grinning as she sips her beer, and Vanessa can’t help but make a face at her wording.

“I’m not trying to get her attention. That makes it sound like I’m into her.” Vanessa scoffs, before taking a sip of her gin and tonic. “Just trying to teach her a bit of a lesson.”

“Sounds like a lot of effort to put in just to teach someone a lesson.” Kameron lifts her chin slightly, gestures to where Vanessa’s friends are sitting. “Is it the blonde?”

“I can’t turn around and look right now, but - yes, it’s the blonde.” Vanessa wants to fidget on her chair, turn around and see Brooke’s reaction for herself. “Why, what’s she doing?”

“She looks kinda pressed. You’ve definitely gotten her attention, alright.”

“Really?” Vanessa leans in closer to Kameron, trying to see if she can decipher what Brooke is up to from Kameron’s reactions. “How so?”

“Looking like she wants to come over here and give me a talking-to.” Kameron snorts. “Think you’ve made her jealous.”

“Jealous, huh?” Not Vanessa’s initial intention but…she’s not mad about it.

Brooke’s used to getting every girl she wants. Maybe this will be a change for her.

“I’ve missed you and your weird schemes, V.” Kameron clinks the neck of her bottle with Vanessa’s glass. “How’s the salon?”

“Good. We still all miss you, though.” Vanessa pouts, crossing her arms.

Kameron raises her eyebrows. “It’s been three years since I’ve worked there with you guys.”

“And yet no replacement employee has ever been the same.” Vanessa gives her best dramatic sigh, and it has the intention of making Kameron crack up. “How’s Asia doing?”

The telltale smile that rises on Kameron’s face at the mention of Asia is heartwarming, Vanessa can’t deny it. “She’s good. Currently watching Jeopardy reruns and she’d told me not to wake her up when I get home.”

“You guys are the cutest. I want me a girl like that.” Vanessa sighs, almost wistfully. It really has been awhile since she’s had a girlfriend, and she’s never had a relationship as adorably hilarious as Kameron and Asia with their bickering.

“Yesterday we started fighting over the proper way to pronounce ‘caramel,’ and I almost had to sleep on the couch.” Kameron’s deadpan voice makes Vanessa giggle, because the sight is so easy to picture. “But pause that conversation. Your girl’s walking over.”

“She’s not-”

“Hey Vanessa, everything okay?”

Vanessa spins on her stool to face Brooke, and Kameron plays her part by edging ever so slightly closer to her. Not quite with her arm around her, but enough to catch Brooke’s notice.

“Everything’s great.” Vanessa’s voice is chipper than usual, and she doesn’t miss how Kameron holds in a snort. So much for acting.

“Cool. Just checking.” Brooke looks like she’s on edge, like she’s biting her lip to keep herself from saying something.

Vanessa slides off the barstool with her drink in hand, trying to ignore the fact that she loses a couple inches off her height when she does despite the heels. “That being said, we’re pretty much wrapping up. Talk to you later, Kam?”

“See you around, V.” Kameron winks, winks, and Vanessa really does have to applaud her dedication towards acting the part.

Brooke follows behind Vanessa as they walk back towards their friends. Vanessa looks up at her as they weave through the crowds, tugs on her hand so that she doesn’t lose her. She plops back down on her original stool and Brooke sits down beside her, looking a little grumpy for a night out.

“Kam’s nice, isn’t she?” Vanessa watches Brooke’s face closely as she asks the question, sees the way she scowls.

“Sure.” Brooke grunts. “Do you guys know each other?”

“Nope.” Vanessa pops her lips on the final ‘p’. “She bought me a drink, so I went to talk to her. Turned down her offer to dance, though.”

Brooke looks up from her drink, her curiosity getting the better of her. “Because you weren’t interested?”

Vanessa shrugs. “Nah. Because my feet are tired in these heels.”

“Oh.”

“Wouldn’t say she’s my type, though.” Vanessa keeps her voice as light as possible, leans forward in her seat.

“No?” Brooke’s breath looks like it hitches in her throat, and Vanessa can’t help but tuck a lock of hair behind her own ear, drum her fingers on the tabletop.

“Nah. I like blondes, not redheads.”

The noise that Brooke makes as Vanessa walks away to join A’keria and Silky’s conversation is worth it.

The only thing worse than Brooke’s pounding headache from her hangover is the way she can still absolutely remember everything from last night.

She feels stupid, she really does. What made her go up to Vanessa like that? They’re friends, she’s not into her like that. Not when Vanessa doesn’t even like g-

Brooke doesn’t know anymore.

Her brain feels like it’s being pulled into a million directions, and Silky and A’keria had been no help, telling her ‘we’d know if Vanessa was gay, wouldn’t we? She’s our friend’ and ‘I dunno B, better go to the source yourself,’ and now, Brooke has no idea at all what to believe anymore.

Silky and A’keria wouldn’t steer her wrong, would they? But that redhead had clearly been flirting with Vanessa, and Brooke’s not sure why it had bothered her, really, but still. Brooke had only gone over to see if Vanessa was okay, if she was in a situation she didn’t want to be in, but Vanessa had been plenty enjoying herself. Maybe Vanessa had thought the redhead was being friendly.

But it’s too much for her brain to untangle during her late morning class, the blaring of the music over the speakers hardly a distraction from the way Brooke just wants to go back to bed. She can’t even imagine moving like her dancers are doing so on the floor, trying to twirl herself around. She needs more coffee.

The end of the class can’t come soon enough, and by the time the dancers are cooling down, stretching, Brooke’s heading for the Keurig machine in her office to fill up her cup again. The first sip burns her tongue and she yelps as she steps back into the studio, grumbling to herself as the dancers leave one by one.

Running a class on a Saturday at 11 a.m. had been a mistake.

Brooke doesn’t get to focus much on her scheduling shortcomings, though, when the door opens, the jingle of the chain making Brooke’s head snap up.

Of course Vanessa still looks put together the morning after a night out.

Vanessa pauses once she reaches Brooke, taking in her appearance. Brooke knows it’s nothing to write home about - her button down, her leggings, her ‘say hey if you’re gay’ mug that she’s clutching to like a lifeline - but hey, not everyone is capable of putting a full face of makeup on after getting hammered the night before.

Vanessa has a smile on her lips that Brooke doesn’t really understand, one that her brain isn’t working enough to decipher anyway. But then Vanessa sits down beside her, casts an eye to her mug.

“Hey.”

Brooke makes a face. Why is Vanessa being so weird in the morning? “Hi?”

Wait. Hold on.

Brooke can feel her jaw drop just as Vanessa begins to crack up, pointing to her mug. “You take a long time to realize things, y’know that?”

“But…what…how?” Brooke’s looking down at her mug, looking up at Vanessa, and Vanessa’s just said hey which means-

“Bi, not gay. But close enough.” Vanessa has a shit eating grin on her face but Brooke can’t really unpack it now, anyway, because her brain is just…mush.

“Wait…so you’re not straight?” Brooke needs another sip of her coffee, maybe another cup, because she’s not quite sure if she’s still asleep or not, because maybe she’s still dreaming, maybe the entire week of Vanessa acting strange has been a dream-

But Vanessa rolls her eyes. “No, dumbass. And when did I ever tell you that I was?”

“But you had a boyfriend-”

“Bisexuals exist, y’know.” Vanessa’s raising an eyebrow, and Brooke gives her a sheepish smile, because she absolutely has a point. “That’s what happens when you assume things about people.”

“Wait. That explains-”

“The outfits, the King Princess?” Vanessa snickers, and she really does look happy with herself. “Thought I could teach you a little something about not always following stereotypes.”

“Okay, but A’keria and Silky-” Brooke pauses, remembering their words. “They’d say they’d know if you were gay.”

Vanessa shrugs. “They didn’t lie. They’d know if I was, wouldn’t they?”

Brooke frowns when Vanessa cracks up, because it had been a play on words, sure, but absolutely made Brooke believe something else. “That’s fucking sneaky.”

“Sorry, B.” Vanessa’s the one looking a little sheepish now, scooting a little bit closer, and Brooke’s never really noticed how good her perfume smells, really. “Didn’t mean to deceive you. I mean, I did, but y’know.”

“I can’t even be mad, it was clever.” It’s true. Brooke’s lowkey impressed that Vanessa’s pulled it off, that she’s been duped to the high heavens and it makes her wonder if anyone else from their friend group had known. “Was anyone else in on it?”

Vanessa shrugs. “A’keria and Silky helped a bit, no one else from our friend group. Kameron did, though.”

Brooke pauses, remembering the redhead. “So wait…that chick. You knew her?”

“Kameron’s an old friend who is happily taken.” Vanessa winks at Brooke as she says the words and Brooke’s not sure why her heart feels a little bit lighter after the admission, but it does.

“Oh.”

“You look pleased to hear that.” Vanessa’s looking at her with an expression that is knowing, way too knowing, and Brooke scoffs.

“I’m happy for her happiness, that’s all.” It’s a flimsy excuse, one that Vanessa appears to see through right away, from the way that she scoots a little closer, resting a hand on Brooke’s leg. “But y’know, you did pull quite a fast one. You’re lucky my feelings aren’t hurt.”

Vanessa snorts. “What, would you want something in consolation?”

Brooke shrugs, looking at Vanessa properly. She sees the way Vanessa’s eyes are sparkling, the way there’s a smile threatening to light up her face that she’s trying to hold back.

So Brooke may as well try.

“Going on a date with me would help to soothe this wound, for sure.” Brooke gives Vanessa a fake pout, puts her hand on top of Vanessa’s. “Y’know, to make sure I’m okay and all that.”

“Just to make sure you’re okay, huh? No other reason?”

“Oh, I can think of plenty of reasons.” Brooke can’t help the cheekiness that pushes through, the charm (or lack thereof) that never seems to fail with the ladies. And it seems to work with Vanessa, who’s rolling her eyes but nodding her assent.

“Well. Fair’s only fair, I suppose I can out of the goodness of my heart.”

“The goodness of your heart, hm? As if you haven’t been flirting with me for the last week.”

Vanessa gasps. “I have not!”

Brooke grins, because now that she thinks back to it, it’s all beginning to make sense. “You totally were. You’ve been trying to get my attention this whole time.”

“As if.” Vanessa crosses her arms, and the pout on her lips somehow makes Brooke want to kiss her.

“So you don’t want to go on that date, then?” Brooke’s barely gotten the words out before Vanessa’s sputtering again.

“I didn’t say that.”

“Thought so.” Brooke grabs Vanessa’s hand, tugs her closer until she can see the gloss on Vanessa’s lips, the highlighter sparkling along her cheekbones.

“Shut up.” Vanessa’s lips are upturned as she says it, as her eyes drag down to Brooke’s lips. “I’ll pick you up at eight.”

With that, Vanessa stands up, turns on her heels to leave the studio. Brooke can’t help but watch the view as she leaves, shaking her head.

She has no idea what she’s getting herself into with Vanessa, but she’d be lying by saying that she isn’t completely ready for it.

[theartofruling]

Through war and triumph (Isabeau Deana Olsen) rises, at (490, appears 30) years old, serving as (a Madam/owner of riverboat casino and brothels) residing in (Southland). They are a (Syreni Immortalem ) that resembles (Vanessa Morgan). Upon meeting them, they are (focused) and (determined). Don’t be fooled, they can be (abrupt) and (lethal).

Name:  Isabeau Deana Olsen

Nicknames/Alias: Izzy, Beau, 

Face Claim: Vanessa Morgan

Age: 490/30

Gender: Female

Sexuality: Pansexual

Species: Syreni Immortalem

Job:  A Madam/ Co-owner of brothels across the realms Called The Secret Garden. And the Riverboat Casino called The Secret Garden Cruise

PERSONALITY

Beau’s personality can be described as chaos. She’s self motivated and selfish and while she gives off the air that she enjoys fun, it’s only to sell her businesses. She also has the motivation of being a survivor. She’s lived three lives, and each time her personality changed just a tad. She hadn’t outright remembered them all until recently, but Beau 3.0 as she now called herself maybe the best yet. 

RELATIONSHIPS

Parents:  Mother and Father both deceased 

Siblings: Brother - Markus Olsen

(Late) Ex-Husband - Nik Reneau Open (must be immortalem)

Daughter - Zinnia Reneau (open - must be a vampire)

Ex-Boyfriend - Kaan Altun

Best Friend/Business Partner - Kat Moore

FWBs - Torben Hansen, Open

BIOGRAPHY:

Deana Olsen had been a child that enjoyed life. She’d toddled around after her big brother, envisioning him as her hero. She looked up to him and always found herself wanting to be like him or spend time with him. Even in her teen years and into her adult years, she remained close to him. 

Deana often let curiosity rule her. She was curious about the world around and the species that she could never truly be. She felt plain amongst the rest, and wanted to join the world of the supernatural, so she befriended those that had special abilities. She’d been particularly fascinated with vampires, knowing that one day that would be a species that she could become. She immersed herself in their culture, allowed herself to be a donor for them, and attempted to find a sire. 

The eager, petite human, had even fallen in love with her soon to be sire. That was until one night, she found herself on. the wrong side of Northland. Out late one night, enjoying the night life in the heights had cut her life short. Deana, met a vampire with an insatiable burn in their throats for thirst. One that would not only drain their victims but also rip them to pieces. Her end came swiftly at the age of twenty-five. 

                                      ______________________

She was reborn. Her body too damaged to reincarnate, having to start from child to adult. This time Izzy, as she preferred to be called was adopted after being found in an alley. Of course due to the curse, she had no memories of what she was or her past life. Izzy West had a great life. 

She grew up, her abilities never bubbling to the surface, another human life to life once more. This time, she found herself in a family terrified of the unknown. Humans that held every weapon known to man to protect themselves against the supernatural. fear kept them rooted in Kings Hill, but Izzy craved being outside the walls of safe. She joined the rest of the world to live dangerously. 

The young woman tried all the adventures she set her mind to. She had a daredevil in her small frame. Izzy rarely saw her family, their fear felt like it held her back. She tried her hand at many different crafts. Any trade she was willing to try it at least once - but she had a knack for gambling. Sometimes, she even overextended. It was exciting and dizzying to take a risk. 

She felt that in all her years alive, she had cheated death, already living to be over a century while still looking like a thirty year old. Izzy never knew what she was other than lucky, so she spent her life thrill seeking, pushing her luck to it’s maximum. Until her luck ran out. She went all in on a bet that she couldn’t cash, and found herself on the bad end of a beating that cost her her life. Again she was reborn. 

                                      ______________________

In her current life, Isabeau Reneau, was adopted into fortune. She was the adoptive daughter of a minor lord in Southland. The sandy beaches were home, and she always felt this tug toward the water. She wanted to captain a ship. She wanted to travel the seas, and her favorite game as a child was pretending to be a pirate. Her parents laughed it off, and always set her straight. She had high expectations, and they were for her to marry into a good family. 

Her job was to elevate the family. Considering that they thought she was merely human for the first part of her life, the push was necessary for her to marry high to make up for that shortcoming. While they loved her, they had social standing and importance. 

She was always at court, always looking for a suitor. It felt like a life in constraints. Unhappy, but fulfilling her family’s wishes. She entertained many suitors, before finally settling upon one in good standing, one with title of Duke in Southland. She was to be the future Duchess. And life would be set by her family standards. She was no faerie, but at least she could be a duchess for them. 

Just before they were set to marry, Beau’s abilities started to surface. It put a strain on her relationship with the Duke. Claiming to hear strange voices from the ocean did not bode well for her impending marriage. Having a wife that had gone mad wasn’t at the top of any list. She’d started to see things that weren’t there. Feel like her body was being transported to a different place - a memory that wasn’t hers. 

That particular ability came in handy to find out that her husband to be was aligned as a spy for another realm. It wasn’t long before he was being tried for treason and she was being questioned. His home realm managed to intervene, but they were forever stained. Her fall from grace and nobility came hard, crashing from being on top with a bright future, to nothing. For a long while she wasn’t welcomed at court. Her family distanced themselves so that they wouldn’t be implicated. Beau was alone and the only way that she could possibly pick herself up was to rely on herself. 

She turned to selling the only thing she had, her body. She worked in brothels and independently. She began to network and became a madam. Her people were so incredible at what they did, that they worked their way into being invited to parties in the very circles that she’d been cast out of before. Later in life, she’d franchised her brothels with a business partner. There were The Secret Garden Brothels in every realm, and they’d even expanded with a riverboat casino and brothel inside. Beau hadn’t truly known her other iterations, until one  full moon she’d started to remember. Who she was, even though in her quest for independence, she’d already researched and surmised what she was. Life was coming together for her, but there was one person that could make her whole again. Her big brother. 

[unleashzedragon]

And it’s Kerry Collins in the I formation, number 12 in the backfield, Oakland on the Green Bay 34 yard line...takes the snap, hands off to Cross the half-back...shoots for a hole in the defensive line and BREAKS THE TACKLE! The 20...the 10...TOUCHDOWN Raider Nation, Mark Cross with his second touchdown carry on the night…

Part 1 - The Rusty Nail

Somewhere in middle America

17th February 2021

Mark "The Dragon" Cross emerges from the diviest-looking of dive bars, with his full glass of whiskey in hand. The sound of Sweet Home Alabama swells to a crescendo, then subdues just as quickly with the opening and closing of the door.

He was on the first leg of the Wrestling Roadshow, a new venture, but the same familiar touring format, a new city every week, the kind of travelling circus where you were expected to cut your teeth as a rookie, sleeping in cars and cheap motels, and where you tended to wash up for some quick cash when your drug habit was out of control. Neither applied, his career in the last year or two was going through a real renaissance.

So why? To keep busy, he guessed. He loved everything about Miami, the weather, the people, the fast cars, but he always had to be occupied with something, in mind and body, and in the place where time is merely a suggestion, he struggled to *fully* embrace it. His new partner Amber, who’d moved from New York to live with him just a few months back, had worked two jobs to keep afloat in the big city. Now she was going full-tilt setting up her dance studio in Florida. They were two people that were both just...more comfortable doing something, it worked and with BFTP on the horizon, he was pleased for the opportunity to tune up with some real action.

Cindy: Just my luck I start talking to the one wrestler in a dive bar that’s spoken for huh?

The girl behind the voice was an eclectic mix of rock chick and cowgirl. Nirvana t-shirt, ripped skinny jeans, dyed black hair, cowboy hat and leather boots to match..

The Dragon: It’s not a question about whether they’re single, it’s just a matter of if they care.

Cindy: Ah - So it’s like that. Hey, got a light?

From his pocket, Mark produces a gold Zippo lighter, an ornate Japanese dragon design wrapping around the front, back and sides. It looks battered and very well loved. He flicks it open, lighting it in the same slick motion, showing the deftness of someone that had practiced with the adult fidget toy on countless road trips like these to pass the hours. Cindy passes her Lucky Strike through the flame, charring the tip.

Cindy: Thanks. You smoke?

The Dragon: Nope.

Cindy: Just carry a lighter everywhere you go huh? 

The Dragon: Well the heroin isn’t gonna cook itself…

Cindy’s face is around 20% intrigue, 60% shock and 20% horror, or so Mark calculates it as he stuffs the Zippo back into his jeans. He throws his hands up in defence. He figures that the girl isn’t one for going much past alcohol and a dance to get her kicks.

The Dragon: I’m kidding I’m kidding! That’s definitely not me...

Cindy: Thank fuck...had a bad experience with an ex boyfriend, but anyway, I bet you’ve got some good stories from the road, right? Feels like you owe me one, since I can’t take you home with me...

The Dragon: Yeah, sorry if that got a little weird in there…

Cindy: Nah - It’s cool. Nice to see someone faithful to their girl for once honestly. So - How about it?

The Dragon: Hmm, a story...I can tell you about the time I went on a date with Vanessa Hudgens?

Cindy: A wrestling story!! Wait - You went on a date with…

The Dragon: Yup. Shared a hot tub.

Cindy: Ew, OK no thanks, definitely a wrestling story.

The Dragon: OK so take it all the way back to 2013, and I’m booked on this tour to go through Cambodia.

Cindy: Big wrestling scene in Cambodia then?

The Dragon: Well to be fair, their traditional Khmer wrestling has been practiced for centuries, but that wasn’t what this was about. The US market, Japan, Mexico, all pretty saturated, right? And in the UK we basically just watched the American stuff, so there you go, hard to break into these places. Some genius investor with too much spare cash and too much time decided there was money to be made in “emerging markets”. Vietnam, Thailand, Cambodia, Africa you name it. It was insane, but the guy had deep enough pockets that it could all go south and he wouldn’t care. I was in the first few years of my career, and with the amount of money on offer there were some top top guys lined up for this tour. I was set for a great match every night, none of us could turn it down.

Cindy: Sounds bad for business. 

The Dragon: Well yeah exactly, although, reat thing about places like that, a fancy hotel room that'd cost hundreds of dollars here is what, 30-40 bucks a night. Amazing food, cheap. Booze, cheap. All paid for of course, so we're taking full advantage every stop, three-course meals, drinking our own body weights in top shelf liquor, all rocking up at the next place with the hangovers from hell.

Cindy: Great role models!

The Dragon: The pioneers leading the campaign for Cambodian professional wrestling, go us! It's all going great, best free holiday I've ever been on, I’m picking up great advice left and right, fighting some of the best in the business, until we stop in this town up in the mountains…

Cindy: Ooh is it getting good?

The Dragon: Yuh-huh. So I get sent out to work this local guy, wrestles the traditional style, doesn’t speak English or anything so we just go out there and wing it, hope for the best. I’ve got a huge size advantage over him for a start...genius planning there...and the ring...well they’re kinda springy, tough to explain if you’ve never been in one, and you can get bounce off the ropes too, help you get speed and leverage.

Cindy: ...so there’s like...ways he could have dealt with your size advantage?

The Dragon: Yeah that’s right, if he knew that, or had ever been in a ring before. So the guy can’t throw me and runs out of ideas in the first minute, just starts peppering me with forearms and elbows if I get anywhere near him, hurts like hell, and the match is starting to totally suck for the fans at this point. In the end I just start running at the guy and launching myself in the air, just hoping he makes it look like he had something to do with it. I don’t know if the crowd bought it or not, but at least we put on a wrestling show. Kinda. It was just a sign of how the night was gonna go.

Cindy: Finally, drama. I was getting kinda bored... 

The Dragon: What a bitch! So I get through the curtain into the locker room and the guys are starting to look real tense about something, there’s not the usual banter, and since NOBODY railed me for that awful match I’d just had, I knew something was up. Apparently there's been a mix-up with our accommodation, and it isn't up to its usual standard for this leg of the trip. I mean, most of these guys were on big full-time contracts by now, sleeping in cars was long behind them, and I was still living off NFL money. I flew coach, but I treated myself to a nice place to rest my head when I booked my own accomodation. This had everyone seriously on edge.

Cindy: Oh no!!

The Dragon: Oh HELL no. So our bus pulls up at this ‘hotel’, building looks like it’s falling apart, the first thing that hits us, any guesses?

Cindy: The smell?

The Dragon: Good guess, but the noise! Honestly there's this fucking V12 engine or whatever ROARING the second we step out of the bus, can barely hear ourselves talk, let alone sleep, we hope whatever it is is gonna stop soon.

Cindy: It didn't stop did it?

The Dragon: That noise? It was the generator powering the whole hotel. Absolutely no way it was going off at any point. It takes a while for us to figure that out though...we didn’t bring a translator, there was always someone at these fancy hotels who spoke English, so who gets sent to the bar to find out about the noise? Me. Under the great logic that I trained in Japan, I spoke pretty good Japanese, and since Cambodia and Japan are kind of the same…

Cindy: Are they?

The Dragon: No. I think she spoke a little Chinese, in a dialect I’d never heard of, super useful, so the whole thing turns into pointing and hand signals within seconds. By the end of it I come away with a fistful of room keys, as many bottles of spirit as I could carry, and some bad news about the generator. We’re all sitting down on this mismatched plastic garden furniture, pretending we’re in a real hotel bar, trying to wonder how much of this home brew Cambodian rice wine we’re gonna have to drink before that generator noise magically goes away. One of the guys went to check out the rooms, and suddenly we hear a scream. A girly scream.

Cindy: No way…

The Dragon: So this guy, he was Mexican, little dude, but proper tough guy persona, comes sprinting out from his room in a panic, giving it the full-on like ‘Ay de mí! Ay, Caramba! ¡maldición!’ or whatever Mexicans say, arms waving around.

Cindy: Terrible accent.

The Dragon: Cheers - Turns out he’s getting chased by a bear…

Cindy: A bear?!? What the fuck!

The Dragon: It was a sun bear, they’re not very big, more scared of us than we are of him I reckon, and this thing jumps up on the table, knocks all the booze flying, we’re scattering cause it’s not very big by bear standards but it’s a fucking BEAR nonetheless, that was just chilling in one of our rooms, absolute carnage…

Cindy: All those big strong wrestlers getting scared of a little bear…

The Dragon: Nah c’mon, bears are vicious, that thing could have easily taken down three or four of us I reckon. We all agreed to stand back and let the bear leave on his own time.

Cindy: Did he?

The Dragon: Yup, bounced off into the darkness, we set about trying to drink the bar out of it’s alcohol supply, managed a few hour’s sleep each, somehow, and the rest of the tour went off without a hitch.

Cindy: Such an anti-climax!

The Dragon: Would you rather have had the Vanessa Hudgens story?

Cindy: Uhh...no. Anyway I’m gonna go get another drink, you coming?

The Dragon: I’ll be there soon, I’m just gonna…

Cindy: ...phone your girl?

The Dragon: Uh...yeah.

Cindy: Aww, young love eh? So sweet! I’ll get you one in, I expect a better story next time!!

Cindy heads for the door.

The Dragon: Can it be about Vane-

Cindy: NO!

[okjagk]

Happier

|7 times Aaron looked happier with Alex and one time he didn’t. Or the Ed Sheeran songfic no one asked for.|

——————————————————————————————-

guys.... don’t faint but..... i updated Happier

AO3 Link

[Chapter 7]

But I guess you look happier, you do My friends told me one day I’ll feel it too I could try to smile to hide the truth But I know I was happier with you

The chances of Robert, Aaron, and Alex all being in the pub at the same time are pretty high, therefore it’s not unusual when the couple walk in and take the remaining seats at the bar, right next to Robert. What is far less likely, and therefore far more suspicious, is Chas announcing that it is time for a pub quiz the moment the two men settle in with their pints. Robert has 0 intentions of participating and orders another pint from Charity as Chas sets up the microphone and the rest of the punters gather into teams.

“Come on it’ll be a laugh” He overhears Alex whining to Aaron. Robert smirks into his pint at the memory of Aaron using those same words on him at the last pub quiz they attended. “Alright if ya really want to.” Aaron concedes and flashes Alex a tight smile. Then he turns his attention on Robert and says, “Want to be on our team?” and Robert chokes on his beer.

“You what?” He takes the napkins Chas offers him, ignoring her pleased smirk, and wipes at his mouth and damp top. Aaron is smiling this kind of sad, kind of amused little thing when Robert looks back up at him. “I said do you want to be on our team? For the quiz I mean.”

Robert needs an excuse, any excuse to say no. He can’t say he’s leaving; he’s just got his pint. He looks around the pub for anyone else he could team up with and sighs when he realises that 90% of the village hates him and the other 10% occasionally tolerates him. No one wants him on their team. Except Aaron…. And that makes Robert’s heart beat in a funny way which he chooses to ignore.

God must take pity on Robert because Victoria walks in at that very second. “VIC!” He shouts to get her attention, waving her over before turning to Aaron and giving him his most convincing apologetic smile. “Sorry Aaron, I’ve promised to be on a team with Vic.” But Vic is useless as ever. “Team for what?” She asks as she makes her way over to the bar and looks expectantly at the pair of them, her innocent smile makes Robert forgive her before he can even get mad. “Pub quiz.” Aaron answers for him, “Come on you’re on our team.” Aaron moves to get another stool for her, taking the opportunity to whisper in Robert’s ear, “Quit being a muppet, we’re mates yeah?” Rob looks into those blue eyes that he used to call home and simply nods, not trusting his voice when Aaron is close enough to breath in his words. He can do this, it’s just a pub game, all he has to do is slap on a smile and pretend to be alright for an hour. Then he can escape.

40 minutes later the drinks are flowing and the questions are still coming, their team is winning, and Robert is almost enjoying himself. “No chance Aaron, her first single was Tim McGraw!” “Mate you’re wrong it was definitely Love Story!” The question is “What was Taylor Swift’s first single?” and Robert knows that Aaron knows he’s right. Aaron doesn’t know a thing about Taylor Swift and Robert knows too much (something only Aaron is aware of). But the playful banter feels natural and 4 pints each have them forgetting there are other people on their team. “Love Story wasn’t even on her first album!” They write Tim McGraw as their final answer without even consulting Alex or Vic.

There’s a tie between their team and the team with Chas, Paddy, Charity, and Vanessa. They’re going to have the play Rodney’s tiebreaker and suddenly Robert is sober and looking for an escape again. Vic places a reassuring hand on his shoulder and she knows, of course she knows because she’s Vic, and Robert tries to relax his breathing. He orders another pint from Bob, who’s minding the bar so Chas and Charity can play, and hears Aaron do the same. He sips his beer and wipes his sweaty palms on his trousers while tuning out the sound of Chas guessing all of Paddy’s words. The thought of Alex doing that for Aaron makes his stomach turn and he takes another gulp of beer to hide his grimace. Paddy gets 7 points.

It’s their team’s turn now and they decide Aaron should get to describe the words. It makes sense, Aaron is the only one who knows every member of the team well enough, but Robert still wishes they picked Vic like he suggested. Nice, neutral Vic. But Aaron goes up and takes the cards and the timer is flipped and then he looks dead at Robert and says “Our place” and Robert doesn’t even blink before saying “Barn”. They get a point.

Now Robert is feeling a different kind of anxiety, instead of worrying that Alex knows Aaron better than he does, he’s worrying that Alex doesn’t know Aaron at all. They have 7 points, tied with the other team, and the whole pub is silent, tension palpable, as the timer runs down and Alex still hasn’t figured out that the word is Las Vegas. Robert is sitting in silence because he’s gotten 5 of the points and Alex hasn’t gotten any and it’s not his place to know Aaron anymore.

“I’ve always wanted to go here, it’s in America, it’s where Cirque performs! Come on you know this!” He’s looking at Alex intently. Robert can see how desperately he wants proof that the doctor knows him, even just a little. But Alex’s expression is apologetic and he looks like he’s drowning and Aaron looks a little hurt and a little sad and a lot ticked off. He rounds on Robert then with wild eyes and a biting tongue and says, “Where we were meant to get married” and Rob’s heart hurts and he knows he shouldn’t answer but he chokes out a strangled “Las Vegas” just as the timer runs out.

They win but no one wants to celebrate. Alex leaves without a word, silently slipping out the door. Aaron is just staring at Robert, his expression still angry but there’s a softness there too, something only Robert can see, and it’s too much for the older man to take. He pushes his chair back abruptly; the scraping sound it makes is like nails on a chalkboard and draws the attention of everyone in the place. They watch as Robert rushes through the pub and into the men’s toilets, leaving Aaron to choose who he goes after, the boyfriend or the ex-husband. Vic stands too, makes to go after her brother, but Aaron stops her with a hand on her shoulder and goes instead, forgetting about Alex all together.

Robert splashes his face with the water from the running tap and braces himself on the edge of the sink. He’s shaking a bit, his breaths coming in shallow gasps, and his stomach is rolling in a way that makes him think he might be sick. Aaron walks in just as a loud sob rips through him. Aaron’s there in an instant all soothing tone and calming words, rubbing his hands over Robert’s hot skin and it’s too much and not enough and he just shatters.

He flips them around and has Aaron pinned to the wall in a fraction of a second, not quite sure if he’s going to hit him or kiss him. They stand there for a moment, breathing each other in. Aaron's eyes darken and Robert feels the storm brewing and they both know that they’re helpless to what happens next. It’s not clear who makes the first move but all of a sudden they’re kissing and it’s violent and desperate and so hot it burns. A flaming mess of teeth and tongue and hands and painful, aching need. Robert’s lips slot against Aaron’s like they belong there, they dobelong there, and his palms are being scraped by beard and he’s on fire in a way he hasn’t been in months. They kiss for years it feels like and it still isn’t enough. Then it’s over just as quick as it started. Aaron is suddenly miles away on the other side of the room but Robert can still taste the other man’s tongue in his mouth so he knows he didn’t dream it.

“Sorry…” He’s not but he knows he should be so he says it. Aaron just looks at him, as if he’s seeing him for the first time in ages, and suddenly everything makes sense and the world is right on its axel again. Robert watches as his ex-husband takes a hesitant step towards him and feels a seed of hope plant itself deep in his chest. Maybe Aaron feels it too.

But then Marlon bursts through the door and stumbles into a stall in a big hurry. The sound of dry heaving is like a large bucket of ice water dumped right over Robert and Aaron’s fire, extinguishing it completely.

Robert tries to looks back to Aaron, to figure out what could be going on in that gorgeous head, but Aaron refuses to meet his eyes. Before he can even open his mouth to speak Aaron is pushing past him and out the door, to find Alex no doubt, and Robert can physically feel his heart breaking all over again.

Marlon opens the stall and steps out, looking a little green around the gills as well as utterly mortified. “Sorry about that, took a swig of the milk to see if it was still good… it wasn’t.” The chef shudders at the memory then retreats from the toilets almost as hastily as Aaron, leaving Robert by himself with the burn of Aaron’s touch still on his skin and a reopened hole in his chest.

After what feels like an eternity of racing thoughts and shaking bones Robert turns back to the sink and pours some more cold water on his face. He settles his shaking breaths, composing himself just enough to get back home. He manages to get through the pub fairly easily, he waves off Vic's concerned questions and ignores Chas' disapproving glare, making it out the door with little trouble. But as soon as he steps foot outside he sees Aaron sitting next to him on one of the pub's wooden picnic tables and he's smiling that soft smile, the one Robert used to think was saved just for him. He feels the ache in his chest rip through him with a renewed strength and he drops his gaze immediately. The hope of ever being happy with someone else fades completely from his soul as he stumbles through the front door of Keeper’s just in time to collapse against it before the sobs break free and the tears begin to fall. He never even considers that the smile on Aaron’s beautiful face, may not have been meant for Alex.

Just as Robert had suspected, Aaron had run out of the pub to catch up to his boyfriend. He finds Alex sitting on one of the tables out front; he had expected Aaron to chase after him so he hadn’t wanted to wander too far. But when Aaron finally does approach him with an expression that just screams “we need to talk”, it isn’t to apologise like the doctor had expected. No, instead he's being dumped. He half listens to Aaron explain, saying he cares for Alex but he knows he would be happier with someone else. Alex doesn’t need to ask who, he already knows, of course he knows, the whole village knows. But the universe must be feeling particularly cruel today because as soon as the words leave Aaron’s mouth, a door bangs open and the scrapper’s eyes instantly dart to the blonde man in a leather jacket exiting the pub. A small smile, one Alex has come to know as Aaron’s Robert smile, appears on the usually expressionless man’s face, and confirms what Alex already knew to be true. Aaron is so absorbed in Robert he doesn’t even notice Alex walk away from him without so much as a goodbye.