#rip everyone else whose waiting on comic continuations or asks...i will get to them eventually...

[brodyfoxxsmassivetits]

he's the hottest flower boy that popped up on the scene!!!

+ more jon slop(shocker) gave him a twin brother who doesn't look that much like him because I thought it'd be funny..Jon n Job

i could probably scrounge up moar doodles but darn!! img limit...saved by the bell brodites.... I'LL GET YOU NEXT TIME

[captaindodson]

Being High-School Sweethearts with Officer Slater would include...

A/N: I’ve been on a Bill Hader deep dive and I have fallen for our guy Officer Slater from Superbad. I will credit @fangirl-imagines​​ with most of the inspiration for this and future works involving our favourite officer. I got a bit carried away with this one so I hope you enjoy!

Paring: Officer Slater x F! Reader

Warnings: Fluffy and a bit of angst

Being High-School Sweet Hearts with Officer Slater would include...

- Now this is a little bit different then what you might think so just hold onto your hats.

- I feel you you guys would have met in your senior year through a group project in second period history. Your class wasn’t always so well behaved so your teacher ended up splitting everyone up into groups.

- You and Slater never directly interacted before but you have mutuals friends between each other. So when the teacher told everyone to stand up and meet in their groups it was still a bit awkward. You shuffled across the classroom to your partners who decided to sit in the back corner of the class sitting in silence while the rest of the class got organized.

-  The teacher comes around to hand out the instructions for the assignment, sliding a double sided piece of paper onto the desks in front of everyone. You, of course wanting to elevate the awkwardness goes ahead and introduces yourself to everyone and starts reading out the instructions on the paper. 

- While you read aloud Slater was sneaking glances at you out of the corner of his eye. What you do not realize is that Slater has been meaning to make any sort of move since he saw you in freshman year. 

- On the first day of school you were wearing beautiful baby blue jeans, a white, slight worn out MTV t-shirt, some tennis shoes, and maroon bag, and Slater thought he had seen heaven as he watched you get off the bus and towards the high school. He proceeded to see you everywhere in school (not that he would complain) whether it be in the library, school cafeteria, sitting on the bleachers as he walked by with his friends. Everyday for three years he would always look for you, even just for a second because it brightened his day. 

- He never approached you because he felt that you were out of his league. You were in the popular crowd but, you didn’t partake in sports or cheerleading or anything sterotypical popular kids would do. You were a floater,  a confident, kind, (did I say beautiful yet) floater that everyone wanted to be around. You had friends in just about every cliche there could be except his. 

- His friends always gave him shit (but also support) and tried to embarrass Slater in front of you knowing of his major crush. One time, during a school football game his friends spotted some empty seats on the far end of the bleachers but, also noticed you sitting in-between their walk to their seats. So, when they squeezed past you they jabbed Slater’s side to make him squirm to drop some of his popcorn on your lap. 

- His face became red with embarrassment but you just laugh lightly and say thank you for the snack. Slater just smiles nervously and pushes his friends to hurry up as they laughed loudly. 

- Or another time during the year when the schools drama club was doing their last performance before heading out of state for NYC for a competition, and Slater and his friends were going to go to shit on the drama kids. When they got to the theatre, you were siting by yourself next to the only empty seat, so they came up with a new plan. They told Slater to go find them some seats and when he spotted the only empty seat next to you and he panicked. He turned around to confront his friends but they all left smiling and laughing silently.

- He pondered whether he should leave or stay until he thought this was going to be the opportunity to finally introduce himself to you and have you fall in love with him. Except, as he walked closer, his throat starting closing up and he felt at a loss of words. So when he had to squeeze past you he squeaked out a quick, “excuse me” and sat down. The lights of the theatre dimmed and he proceeded to sit through 90 minutes of Hamlet and didn’t say a word to you. He basked in the scent of your perfume as the play continued on and after the final bows you left unaware of Slater next to you. 

- So after reading the assignment aloud the bell rings almost instantly causing everyone to collect their things and rush out the door. Slater watched you collect your bag and wave goodbye to the group to head off to your next class. Slater sat there for a minute deciding what to do, make his move or continue to admire you painfully from afar until you disappear from his life forever?

- He sighed in defeat and was willing to live in this hell for the rest of the school year. He sluggishly gets up, head hung in defeat, and heads out the door. What he didn’t expect was you leaning on some lockers outside the door and greeting him with with a shy smile before asking him if he wanted to eat lunch with you later to go over the assignment. (at first he didn’t say yes due to shyness, but then quickly changed his answer because he would have been kicking himself if he didn't). 

- You had noticed him staring, and to be quite frankly you’ve been watching him too. You had seen him in the library reading comic books in the farthest row, pushing up his glasses when he read, looking out the window in French class and seeing him and his friends messing around on the football field during free period. For a guy that most girls that you knew considered him scrawny and ‘unattractive’ you could not disagree any faster. You loved his floppy, shaggy hair, his blue eyes, his dimples, and most importantly his laugh. You saw how he was with his friends and you just wanted him to look at you. 

- So after that moment you two started spending more and more time together. You would stop hanging out with most of your friends to eat lunch with Slater in a stairwell or out of the bleachers. You two would read StarWars comic’s in the library while trying to prank his friends, you also had dates at the local theatre, and you were Slater’s first kiss. You both couldn’t be happier. Everything so pure, so innocent about young love, nothing could take that away. Except one thing, insecurity. 

- As graduation came closer Slater suddenly became more distant and cold. You tried to ask why but he just shut down and then out of the blue he broke up with you. You cried for days, wondering what you could’ve done different, what you did wrong,  but you were never given an answer. You left LA shortly after for NYC and Slater had to sit with his choice but eventually got over it.  

- It isn’t until 2007 rolls around when your back in LA working as a waitress in a bar called Baileys which so happens one night to have a special visitor. 

- When Slater was sitting at the bar where he met his ex-wife with Micheal’s and McLovin, having fun watching the security tape from earlier, a woman comes up next to him and leans up against the bar. 

- A much older women whose beauty from high school has not wavered is asking the bartender for the time and if it is okay for you to clock out of your shift and go home for the night. 

- Slater stares, almost frozen in time and watches your lips move in slow motion. Just like when he was staring at you all those years ago in that history class, the love he felt for you makes his heart beat a little bit faster and cheeks become a little bit warmer.

- You don’t even notice the staring as you’ve grown to ignore the stares of guys. You smile at your boss when he tells you can leave. You rip off your small apron and run around the bar into the backroom to get your stuff. When you leave the backroom with a thin coat over your shoulders and your purse in hand, out of the corner of your eye you catch a glimpse of a familiar pair of ocean eyes hidden behind sliver glasses and a police uniform.

- Your breath hitches for a moment but you keep walking. You walk through the messy kitchen to leave out the back door which leads to the street where your car is parked. 

- Slater just stares at the kitchen door blankly, watching as his heart continued to beat faster as the memories of being told how he grabbed your heart and ran it over with his shitty car resurface. He knows he doesn’t deserve a second chance, but he can’t live knowing that you don’t know he’s sorry, so he dashes after you to the surprise of Micheal’s and Mclovin.  

- You just make it to the drivers side of your car when you hear a stern, “wait”. You pause and think for a minute. You haven’t done anything wrong so it is not like he can force you to stay here. You stab your key into your car door and just as your ready to turn it and open up your door this voice lets out a more masculine “hold it right there”.

- You halt your movements and slowly turn around the face the man you haven't seen since he broke your heart. Under the streetlight he is much taller than he was all those years ago and his boyish charms still haven't wavered even though he attempts to make himself look taller and more ‘manly’. 

- You speak before he can open his mouth to say anything else, ‘I don't know who you are, but can you please leave me alone.”

- Slater cringes slightly at your tone. He lets his body rest in a more comfortable posture and he puts his hands up in a defensive pose. 

- “ Okay, I deserve that. But before you leave let me say this, I left you because I got scared and I’m sorry. I thought you’d be better off without some loser attached to your arm when there are a millions of guys much better looking and more manly”. Your eyes soften at his claim as you approach him slowly and his arms drop to his side. 

- “Slater, You were the best thing in that shitty high school. I only left because I could not live in a place where you existed because I would be reminded of the pain of you not being in my life. I loved you ever since I met you, and I never stopped. Why didn’t you talk to me Slater?” You say with pleading eyes. 

“I didn't know how to. Ever since my first wife turned out to be a whore I realized that I could never love anyone again because I didn’t deserve to be loved. When I spotted you inside, it felt like my heart was about the burst. When you left for NYC I thought I got over you, but I never did”. 

- Slater’s breath slows as you get closer, he can start to feel the heat radiating off your body. He looks at you with the same awe, admiration, and love he did all those years ago. Blue eyes twinkling under the shine of the streetlight through his sliver glasses. 

- Slater breaks the silence with, “You can hate me for the rest of your life, just know that I’m sorry-”.

- But before Slater can get your name through his lips you lean up without warning to plant a soft kiss on his which he gladly returns.

- “Take notes Mclovin, Slater is showing you how to kiss a lady.” you both break apart and see Micheal’s, smirk on his face and Mclovin standing along side him looking confused. 

- Slater straightens up with his shoulders with a deep cough trying to appear composed, but the pink tint on his cheeks say otherwise. You ignore the new presence and you drag your hand over his uniformed shoulder to the back of his soft hair where you gentle push his head to meet your lips once more. 

[iwillsendapostcard]

The Poisoned Chalice

Read on AO3 here. 

[Part One] [Part Two] [Part Three] [Part Four] [Part Five] [Part Six]

This is is part seven of my fic for the ‘seven days of robron’ run by @robroninlove. Obviously when I saw that this is the AU day I knew I had to write a fairytale, and it is from this prompt that the whole fic was formed. I’m strangely proud of this chapter- it has definitely been my favourite one to write. After all of the drama of the past week, writing 400 odd words of one character pouring out their heart to another has been wonderfully cathartic. 

The fact that I made @robertisbisexual cry is an added bonus ;)

Summary: There is a plot to poison Prince Robert and it is up to his manservant, Aaron, to save him.

Day Seven- Favourite AU- Fairy-tale (obviously!)

He arrives back in the rooms of the court physician to see Princess Rebecca standing over a prone and pale Prince Robert.

“What are you doing!” the exclamation is out of his mouth before he can stop it.

“Aaron!” Princess Victoria exclaims from another corner of the room. “You made it back!”

“I did, and I have the ingredients for the antidote.”

“We may not need them; Princess Rebecca says she has another cure.”

“I’ll take them anyway,” says Paddy taking the pouch from Aaron. “Just in case Princess Rebecca’s method should fail.”

“This will work. I am sure of it,” Rebecca says from where she is standing by Robert’s still sleeping form. “There is nothing more powerful in the world than true love.”

Paddy nods at her but moves over to his work space nonetheless. Victoria, on the other hand, moves over to Rebecca.

This is his chance, Aaron realises. He could speak out now and expose Rebecca for what she is, expose the harm she has done Robert. But as he looks at her he questions if he may be wrong. He has no reason to believe Christine over her younger sister. For all he knows, everything he has been told is a lie. More than that, Christine only told him that Rebecca’s kiss would not work because she doesn’t think Robert is capable of loving anyone. What if she is wrong, and Robert really does love Rebecca?

And how could he not? She is tall and graceful and pretty. She has shining blonde hair and big expressive eyes. She is elegant and refined. She is everything he is not.

She leans down, strokes a hand through Robert’s golden locks, and presses her lips to his.

The air around him is charged with something that makes Aaron feel like a storm is coming. He half expects a thunderclap to sound when Rebecca ends the kiss.

But nothing happens.

The heavens do not open, the ground does not shake, and Prince Robert does not open his eyes.

“I don’t understand…” the Princess whispers.

“It’s all right,” says Victoria, placing her hand on Rebecca’s back in a gesture of comfort. “Aaron brought the other cure. He’ll wake up soon.”

“No! This should have worked!” Rebecca pushes away from Victoria to lean down and kiss the Prince again. Her beautiful face is cracked with worry. Her shock at her failure is almost comical.

“I don’t understand,” she says again when more of her kisses fail to work.

Aaron takes a step towards her and leans in close so that Paddy and Victoria won’t hear their conversation from where they are preparing the antidote.

“Your sister told me everything,” he says to her, quietly. “She told me what you asked of her, of what you wanted.”

“Then you know this should have worked. True love’s kiss would have awakened him.”

“You need to ask yourself, Princess, what reasons your sister could have for helping you and what she could hope to gain from harming you.”

The Princess reaches out and slaps him clean across the face. He stumbles a bit; she is too slight to have really hurt him, but she has taken him by surprise.

Paddy too as he shouts, “what’s going on?” from where he is working on the antidote.

“I will not be spoken to in this manner by a servant!” she exclaims.

“What did you say to her?”

“I said only the truth!” he retorts. “When I went to fetch the antidote, Princess Christine told me it was the Princess that had poisoned Prince Robert, and why she did it.”

“And you believe what Christine said to you?” asks Paddy.

“I do.”

Rebecca stamps her foot, “I won’t stand for this,” she says, and storms out of the room.

“Is this true?” Victoria asks once she is gone. “Did Rebecca really poison Rob?”

“It is what she told me.” Aaron confesses, “Rebecca wants Robert back, and Christine wants Rebecca accused of murder so that she can take the throne.”

“Oh, this is all such a mess!” Victoria exclaims, her voice thick with tears.

“I brought the antidote. It’s going to be fine.” Aaron reassures her. But a look in her eyes makes him doubt himself.

“We were getting desperate,” she tells him. “That’s why we listened to Rebecca when she said she had a cure. Robert… I’m so sorry, but he doesn’t have long.”

Suddenly, every thought is abandoned. He has to be by Robert’s side.

The Prince is lying exactly where Aaron left him. His skin is still pale and clammy but now his hair also seems to have greyed as if every ounce of colour and vitality has been drained from him. Robert looks so vulnerable, lying there at death’s door. Aaron daren’t reach out and touch him, afraid that his body will already feel like that of a corpse.

“How long do we have?” he asks desperately.

“We don’t know,” Victoria tells him. “Aaron, I’m so sorry!”

“No,” Aaron says. “He drank the poison to protect me. This is my fault.”

“He stubborn,” Victoria replies with a comforting squeeze of his shoulder. “He never makes anything easy.”

“How is the patient?” Paddy asks from where he is stirring together the herbs Aaron brought back.

Victoria moves to feel her brother’s brow, then presses her fingers to his wrist to take his pulse. She stands as still as a statue for a shockingly long time as Aaron feels his heart drop through the floor.

“Not good,” she eventually says. “His heart is barely beating at all.”

“Aaron, could you hold him up please?”

He nods in agreement and arranges himself so that he is sat behind Robert on the bed, the Prince’s back against his chest, his head resting on his shoulder. He wonders, briefly, if this is how Robert felt that day by the lake as he held a shivering Aaron in his arms and tried to keep him alive.

Victoria and Paddy both stand over him as they administer the potion, Paddy dropping the liquid onto the Prince’s tongue as his sister massages his throat to make his body swallow. The three of them are tense as they wait for the potion to have any effect at all.

The Prince’s body suddenly stiffens and Aaron grips onto him tighter on reflex. Then, one enormous shudder wracks through his body, shaking the Prince so violently that Aaron struggles to keep him within his arms. There is one great gasp from him, so strong that it might suck all the air from the room.

And then nothing.

The Prince’s body suddenly goes limp, like a puppet whose strings have been cut. His head lolls on Aaron’s shoulder and he looks down to see Robert’s eyes open and staring up at him.

But there is no life in them.

“What happened!” Aaron cries out. “What do we do?”

He cannot rip his gaze from the ghastly sight of Robert’s dead eyes.

He feels Paddy and Victoria step back from him. “I’m so sorry, Aaron. We were too late.” Paddy says.

“No! There has to be something more we can do!”

Victoria touches his arm very softly. “I’m so sorry, Aaron. He’s gone.”

She reaches out and gently closes her brother’s eyes, robbing Aaron of the sight of them forever.

…

Paddy and Victoria go to inform the King and Prince Andrew about Robert’s death, leaving Aaron to guard the body.

At first, he cannot bear to be near it. The skin and bones that he once adored so much have become gruesome now that there is no longer life in them. Waiting in the room alone with the body is torture because he cannot quiet the small voice within him that asks if maybe, just maybe, there is a chance that they were wrong and some part of Robert clings to life still.

“I cannot believe you have been so foolish!” he exclaims to the empty room, for the first time letting his anger about the whole situation boil over. “You’ve thrown your life away! And for what?”

Before he knows what he is doing he finds himself at Robert’s bedside, his knees buckling under the weight of his grief.

“It should have been me that drunk the poison. You and everyone around us knows this. Why wouldn’t you just let me save you?

“Why did you have to be so stubborn? Why did you have to be so chivalrous? Why couldn’t you let me do this one thing for you?

“How am I supposed to go on now?” he continues, the words pouring out of him, “How am I supposed to live knowing that the only man I have ever loved gave his life for me? And I loved you, Robert. I loved you more than anything. And now you’re gone.”

He buries his head in Robert’s shoulder, unable to stop the sobs that now wrack his body. He’d never admitted his love aloud before, and now he does not know what to do with himself. It is like a cork has been popped from a bottle and there is nothing to do but accept that everything will come pouring out.

“I love you… I love you…” Now that he has said it he is incapable of saying anything else. “I love you, and I don’t know what I’m going to do without you. What I’ll do without your smile, without your humour, without your bravery, or cleverness, or wit. How can I wake in the morning knowing that I won’t see you anymore? How can I sleep and know that I will only ever see you in my dreams? How can I move on knowing that I never had one chance to kiss you?”

Aaron is sure his face must be a mess of tears by now. There is even a wet patch on Robert’s breast where Aaron has been resting his head. Though Robert’s face is pale with death at least now there is also an air of peace about him. Perhaps, if Aaron was ignorant of what had gone before, he might have thought the Prince was only sleeping.

This is his last chance. With all the reverence of a worshiper at the altar of their god, Aaron leans down and presses his first and only kiss to Robert’s lips. It is sweet, and it lingers, but then it is gone.

When he finally moves back and looks down at Robert again, he is shocked to see Robert’s eyes open, lively, and staring right back at him.