#riddler angst
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writingsofmax · 2 years ago
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Disarm pt. 23
Words: 1.8 K
Summary: Y/N finds herself in trouble and Edward goes to save her. Warnings: gun violence, shooting in a public place, general canon-typical violence, puking, graphic depictions of illness
Tags: angst, violence, kidnappin Author's note: self conscious about this chapter because I am not an action writer but I did my best. writing this was like pulling teeth. sorry for the long wait everyone. ALSO as always, a very special thank you to @e-moneyyy for helping me with some of the writing in this chapter!!!!! i would die without her
ALSO: this is the penultimate chapter of disarm so Thankyou to everyone who’s been reading this
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Chapter 23- Bullet With Butterfly Wings
“She has medical problems with her heart.”
Y/N was nauseous. Her heart thumped erratically in her chest and her head pounded as she opened her eyes. She couldn’t get a read on her surroundings as each shape and object in the room bled into the next. It registered that people were talking but she could only make out some of what they were saying. “You gave her what!? Oh Jesus Christ, you—” the words fuzzed out again as she struggled to gain her bearings,”--she might die before he even gets here.” Another man answered, but she was unable to understand it. She realized dully after a moment that she couldn’t move, her ankles were tied and her arms were restricted behind her back. She was seated against the wall of a large room, the bricks cold against her back.
She coughed and slumped down on the floor, drool running in rivulets out of her mouth. I’m gonna puke. “You alright, sweetheart?” A voice asked. She couldn’t bring herself to answer and just watched from the ground as a pair of clean, black leather shoes approached her. They stopped a foot away from her face, before the person wearing them crouched down. I’m gonna die here. “Come on.” The voice said, as hands grabbed her shoulders and propped her back up against the wall, “Up you go.” As her vision came back into focus, she looked at his face. Carmine Falcone. This is bad. Another voice from across the room asked, “Are you sure that this guy that’s coming is… safe? What if he tries something?” I’m gonna die here.  Falcone stopped inspecting her for a second to turn and answer, “I’m certain we’ll lose a few men, but it’s nothing we can’t handle.” 
“I’m sorry about all of this unpleasantness,” Falcone apologized, turning his attention back to her, “Here. Let’s get you out of these ropes, huh?” He said, slowly untying her restraints. “Get that circulation going a little better.” 
She just nodded dumbly at him, unable to move or talk. Waves of nausea ripped through her as her body shook. Even with her ankles untied, there was no way she could stand. She realized as he undid the ties on her arms, that she could barely move those either. 
I’m gonna die here. Another man approached Falcone, handing him a blanket, which he then laid on top of Y/N. “Lose a few men?” The man asked. “Well he is an emotionally unstable guy.” Falcone replied. She wondered if it would be better to just give up completely. She could just ask Falcone to kill her. Like most Gothamites, she knew how gangs operated and knew that Falcone had no intention of letting her leave alive. She took a deep heaving breath, but oxygen wasn’t making it to her lungs. Move. Get up. She tried, but her limbs had turned to stone. This useless body. Always letting me down. 
She was going to die here and her life hadn’t meant much of anything. She had spent years feeling like she was dead already. Life was something everyone else got to have, but not her. Her days were filled with pain and fatigue, spending days in bed, and being a burden for everyone else to worry about. That could be over if she just let it. A wave of nausea ripped through her then, causing her to empty the contents of her stomach onto the concrete floor. Shit. 
The group of men considered her for a moment, while Falcone snapped his fingers at them.
“Clean that up before he gets here.” 
He…? She wondered as one of the men came over with a rag. He gets here…Oh�� She winced as she tried to focus her eyes, but the room kept spinning. Eddie… he means Eddie..
Edward. She wanted him to come— to be able to see him one last time before the end, but then he would die too. Falcone would kill him. Falcone must have figured it out…She cursed herself. She had known this was going to end badly from the beginning, but hadn’t put a stop to any of it. Too late now. She wasn’t going to try to run, she was far too weak for that anyway. Besides, what chance would she have against a mob boss and his goons? Her entire body ached. She laid down on the concrete, pulling the blanket under her head just to rest her eyes. It won’t be long now. Won’t be long at all until he kills me. Strangely, she felt relieved at that. There wasn’t much to miss in her life, she had been alone and at odds with the world these last couple of years. Well maybe not alone. Eddie had been there towards the end. But what had she done except worry him every day? He didn’t need to live his life caring for her. Thinking of his face caused her pain. 
I am not the bright and beautiful girl you say I am, Eddie. She didn’t want to continue being a millstone around his neck. 
In fact, he was probably going to die now because of her. Just another person caught in the black hole of her life. And still, she wanted to see him. Before Eddie, everything had been so lifeless. She had been living the same day every day, but then she ran into him that night. On that night, she had thought she was going to die, but for some reason she had chosen to live. She fought for her life by running away even when it felt like her lungs were gonna give out. And that choice she had made, the choice to stay alive, led her to Edward. Eddie opening the car door, the street lights reflecting off of his glasses. Eddie’s hands that had not touched her yet, but would, on the steering wheel. Before they had known each other. How her life had changed since then.  So are you gonna die here? A little voice inside of her asked. Or are you gonna get up?Is your life over? Are you gonna die here? Moments with Edward flitted through her mind. Curled up on the couch with him on a lazy weekend afternoon, Eddie reading to her in bed.  Getting food at the diner with him when she was feeling well enough to. Autumn walks through the park with their hands intertwined. That electric feeling at the estate sale when he had grabbed her hand for the first time, but not the last. 
Is your life over? Are you gonna die here?  Memories of kissing him, touching him. The long conversations they would have about anything. They were small things, maybe even silly things to most people, but to her it was a life. 
Is your life over?
She couldn’t go for a walk with him whenever she wanted. She couldn’t even be a person that got out of bed every day. She hated those things about herself. She wanted to be normal. But even though she wasn’t, her life had started to become enjoyable again despite it. It was the little things that made her heart rebel against the thought of not seeing him again. Are little things enough to make a life out of? 
Are you going to die here?
Isn’t that all anyone’s life is? A collection of moments big and small that you create meaning from? Get up. Falcone hadn’t left her tied up. The two other men had left. It was just her and him in the room. He had a gun at his side.  Get up. 
—————?————— Edward was outside of the iceberg lounge right on time.
He knocked on the large metal door covered in graffiti and stickers and it swung open. 
“Password?” A large man asked, having to yell over the sound of the deafening music coming from within the club.   Edward laughed, “I have a question for you, actually!”
The man behind the door wasn’t amused, “Just give me the password or stay outside.”
He looked Edward up and down, taking in the coat and mask, “Freak.” he added.
Edward, who could care less about his comments, continued, “Here’s the question!” he chirped, “Who stole my girlfriend and has a hole in their head?”
“Um–”
BANG. A gunshot rang out startling those in the back of the club, closest to the doors.
“YOU, silly!” Edward exclaimed as the doorman dropped dead on the ground. Patrons were yelling and scrambling away from the door. Not everyone in the club had seen or heard because the music was deafening. However, he knew that as those in the back continued to scream, panic, and push forward against the crowd to get away, it would become chaos. He was going to use that to his advantage.
He slipped in between waves of the crowd as he made it to the stairway at the side of the cavernous room. The music reverberated through his bones and the overwhelming rainbow lights washed over him continuously, but he didn’t care.
Looking up the stairs, he saw the elevator that would take him to where she was being held. In the back of his mind he noticed that the screams from the bottom floor were getting louder, as more people discovered the body. Taking up his attention currently was a gang member standing at the top of the stairs.
For a brief moment the two of them locked eyes before Edward reached into his coat pocket. 
BANG Reaching the top of the stairs, Edward stepped over his body as more people fled.
Elevator. People were pushing past him now, as he made his way up the stairs. As he reached the top of the landing he focused on the elevator doors only a few steps away. As he approached, the doors slid open with three more men waiting inside.
BANG BANG BANG
As he stepped inside the elevator he noticed with irritation that the doors wouldn’t close fully. With a sigh, he kicked the offending body out of the way, letting the other two bodies ride the elevator with him. He was almost to where she was.
He reloaded his gun as he traveled up to the top floor, muttering to himself, “The man who invented it doesn’t want it for himself, The man who bought it doesn’t need it for himself, The man who needs it, doesn’t know it when he needs it, what am I?”
He held his gun at the doors, ready to kill anyone who was standing there, and sure enough, two more men were there, but he was ready.
Stepping over their bodies a few moments later, he giggled, “The answer is a COFFIN!” he exclaimed, kicking one of them, “COME ON, the answer is so EASY!” he laughed as he advanced down the hallway.
BANGHe stiffened at the sound of a gunshot from the room at the end of the hallway.
No. I’m not too late, I’m–He ran down the hallway, bursting through the doors, gun ready and–
“Eddie…?”
He was greeted by her shaky voice, and there she was. In one piece. She was holding a gun with both hands, her entire body shaking.
At her feet Falcone lay dead.
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neilpissyrega · 2 years ago
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I think of the lyric “I am human and I need to be loved, just like everybody else does” from How Soon Is Now? by The Smiths and then I think of the Riddler, loveless in his prison cell, and then I cry
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wingedqueenlynx · 11 months ago
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Angst drawing is complete ;]
Based off Riddlers deteriorating mental health and the various painted mirrors in Arkham knight. Our poor boy is going through the ringer.
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I just wanna give him a big hug or a warm blanket to comfort him, cause he needs it. (It’s actually the first time I drawn a character against a mirror and I’m really happy with it) :D
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emacrow · 6 months ago
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Danny wasn't the first to be contaminated with ectoplasm. Jazz was.
Thus contant angst and some gore. Viewer be advised.
Born and raised as a fenton without miraculously being effected by ecto while Jack and Maddie wear hazmut suits most the time up to her teen years would take a miracle.
Jazz knew she was effected by ectoplasm since she was a little girl, taking care of danny as a toddler and trying to make sure her brother doesn't eat the glowing green liquid in the freeze.
She didn't want him to get sick like she did... making sure the gadgets stay out of his line of sight.
He was innocent and too young to notice how ne-neglect her parents were being over their obsession of ghosts.
She was infected enough to see the tiny fading blobs flying around but never mentioned to her parents again after last time, and her parent stay in the basement for almost a week and half that time and missing Danny's birthday again.
Jazz was smart though, reading about psychology books far higher in intelligence then her age, and knew enough about the inventions that Jack made gave her an idea..
A terrible but brilliant idea to bring this family together, so danny could have the best childhood memories then hers..
She began sabotage some of their works to jam and malfunction, making some of their work papers as proof seem crazy to be denied so they actually spent time with her and danny as a Family and it was working well enough for years,....
Until the ghost portal work that day..
Then the ghosts coming out of it causing havoc which renew her parents obsession back from the very grave she has surely made they were buried...
Then finding her brother.. her sweet little brother had died and came back due to her sabotaging the portal with the turn on button being inside...
Something inside her crack a bit.
Helping him and distracting her parents was going well enough. Stealing the ecto shot to help her brother heal from the battles of facing the ghosts, red hunter, GIW and her parents. This was all her fault that she knew deep within..
Until Danny (her sweet little brother that she raise, care for, love)went missing during the middle of his sick day with no ghosts being out today when she decide to go get chicken soup from the store..
She should've seen it sooner when she came back and seen Danny's bed empty with spot mixed of ectoplasm and blood, dropping the chicken soup package from the store ..
Their parents loved them that she knew as she grabbed the fenton creep bat..
But she knew since she was a little girl..
Opening the basement door quietly, slowly and walking down the stairs without making a noise.
That they love their work more.
Her eyes burned with burning fierce firey green glow of pure rage and determination as she creep slowly aiming, as she swung the fenton creep hard on the back of Jack's head with a sickeningly crack, then next quickly hitting Maddie hard in the face as she knew they both won't listen to reason..
She know that would only buy her enough time consider Jack was a hard head, but maddie was out for good measurement. Taking the keys to the ecto shackles.
She know that if she were to cry, she will not stop crying if she did. Unshackling Danny's limbs, and pressing the off button on the ecto Ghost muzzle.
Checking to see if he lost any limbs or organs.. thankfully none yet...
"It's going to hurt, but we are leaving together.. ok danny?" She said with a watery tone looking into her brother's tear soaked red eyes, grabbing the ecto fishing string and a needle, giving Danny's a metal piece of material to bite on, onceshe pressed the freshly Y incision as she began to resew. Giving him a couple of Ecto-Dejecto to speed up the healing. (Pretending it was just a gash in her mind instead of seeing her brother's heart beating with a marble sized core buzzing leaking ectoplasmic mixed blood)
Once she sewed the wound up, rushing to put danny in the back of her car, getting the secretly duffle bags containing the things, New IDs, money, passports needed including a USB of the fenton portal and inventions blueprints in case anything happened(it did, it happen oh god..), rush back to the basment, press the button she had hidden in the lab to delete everything about all the information about the ghost portal and ghost files, the immediate lockdown everything including the portal in 5 minutes then self destruction meltdown minutes afterward.. afterall she did help made the lockdown, putting her own special password(She always make sure to had to backup plan to a backup plan..)
By the time she got to her car, and started driving at speed that would've gave her a police ticket, she didn't stop even when she saw the glowing ectoplasmic forced field emerged covering only the fenton house..
She didn't stop when she left the Amity Park border line.. She didn't stop when the loud ear piercing boom echoing.. she just drove to the only person in one place that would help her..
Her distant cousin twiced removed Edward Nashton whom live in Gotham.
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finzphoenix · 8 months ago
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mousestar369 · 7 months ago
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Bruce mixing up the voices he's meant to use in certain situations. Like;
Riddler: Hahaha! I've-
Batman, in Tired Dad voice: What did you do?
Riddler: I- uh- huh?
Batman, not realizing his mistake: What did you do, Nygma?
Riddler: I took like five people hostage-
Batman, finally realizing his mistake but also realizing it seems to be working??: And where did you put them?
Riddler: I'll show you-
Or;
Jason: Hey, B-
Bruce, in Batman voice: What did you do?
Jason, who just wanted to ask if Bruce wanted any cookies: nothingimsorry
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donut-doodles-doodles · 4 months ago
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Some Batman miraculous doodles, in this mari is Bruce’s kid, riddler finds out before Brice does, hawkmoth discovers she’s ladybug by akumatising her and prompts retires
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zebrashavestripes · 3 months ago
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"The Least I Could Do."
Ed plays it again through his mind: Policemen lined up like tin-soldiers, Oswald standing shoulder to shoulder with him as they peered down their scopes. The gunfire rattling in their ears, blocking out every sound and every thought. There was only the trigger of his gun and the occasional instinct to duck, to dodge (to run away). Oswald shouting, voice carrying like it always does, and Ed’s heart might just be shot today, standing by his side and school-yard taunting the enemy. (The grenade, the aftermath, he should have seen it coming.) More shots and Ed’s legs moved on instinct, the two of them sitting, backs to the barricade, imminent death on their breath. A clinking sound (oh God, oh God), the grenade right in front of them. “ED!” Oswald screaming his name, tearing through Ed’s heartlines. And Ed did nothing. He saw the grenade, felt Oswald by his side and did nothing. That might kill us, he’d thought. That might kill him. Heart hammering, he did nothing. Then Oswald was covering him, holding him, screaming in pain (and it was all Ed’s fault). The rest is a blur, them getting out of there alive, Oswald leaning on him, handkerchief clutched to his eye (I’m sorry). Now, catching his breath, lungs screaming at him (Oswald’s blood-curdling screams), Ed press-plays the scene over and over in his mind. The gunfire—like rain in a thunderstorm. The clinking grenade—innocent as a dropped coin on the subway. The panic—his heart stopping. Oswald covering him—front pressed to his back like a shield. His screams. (His screams.) The gunfire, the grenade, the panic, the shield, his screams. Gunfire, grenade, panic, shield, screams. Ed had said he’d do whatever it takes to keep Oswald safe, but he couldn’t even do this. Ed sits by Oswald’s side, clutching a pair of glasses that aren’t his own, and there’s nothing to say. He should have stopped this from happening, but he did nothing. Absolutely nothing.
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c4nt-sl33p · 2 months ago
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muehehehe
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inuiiwonderland · 2 years ago
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THE DEADLY CURSE
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A/n:I finally did it! This idea has been on my mind for weeks, so here it is! If this does well then I'm also gonna write for the other dorms! This is the longest fic I ever wrote so this better not flop😓
Warning: mentions of blood, throwing up[once], angst and angst, super long BTW and uh that it I think!
Words:10k
Fem reader!
Heartsalbyul❤
-
RIDDLE ROSEHEART
You have liked riddle ever since you defeated his overblot. At first, you thought he was annoying with all the strict rules he made everyone in his dorm follow. But after what happened with his overblot incident, you decided to give him a chance.
And at first it wasn't easy to become friends with the red head tyrant. You would get laughed at by Ace when you told him you wanted to become friends with his dorm leader. Assuming you were just joking, Ace didn't really pay much attention to it. 
Until one day when you, grim and the adeuce duo were in the cafeteria showing each other your test scores from Mr. Crewel class.
"HA! I got a better score than you!" You said as you continued laughing at his face.You could tell Ace was pissed by your comment.
"Even grim did a little better than you by 1 percent" Deuce said which caused Ace to roll his eyes.
"Finally! It isn't me getting laugh at this time!" Grim cheered out.
"Shut up! At least I passed Mr. Vargas' class unlike you!"
"Hey! You always trip me, that ain't fair!"
As the two began bickering while poor deuce tried to calm them down, you didn't notice the person behind you who was listening the whole time.
"Mm you did a good job on that test…wish Ace learned a thing or two from you"
"Oh, thanks riddle" it took you 5 seconds to process the voice from behind you and when you did you quickly turned around.
"Wait…riddle?!" At this you caught the attention of your friends who immediately stopped arguing. Ace gulped seeing his dorm leader in front of him and quickly hid his test sheet.
"Heyyyy riddle…what are you doing here?" 
"It's lunch time Ace"
"Oh! Right…right" riddle sighs and looks at Ace with disappointment.
"You failed the test didn't you?"
"What! No!"
He just stared at him with a deadpan expression and rubbed his temple.
"I made sure to give you extra tutoring lessons and yet you still failed" You could tell he was upset with this and all you could do was stare at his face and think…
Since when was riddle cute? 
And before you knew it, you blurted something out.
"Cute…"
"Huh?" You quickly looked away and noticed your friends staring at you.
"Ahh! I-I said how about I tutor Ace! Yeah! I passed the test with a 98 so I'll be able to help him out with the next!" 
He just stared at you for a bit before giving you an answer.
"Fine, but I expect a good score on the next test and no goofing around! You may be Ace's friend y/n but I expect you to not let Ace slack off or anything of the sort, or else that will be off with your head for both of you!"
"No worries! I got this" He gave you both one last warning before walking away. All you could do was sit there with a beating heart and a headache about what you just got yourself into.
"Great, now I gotta help this idiot pass the next test" 
"Hey!" 
-
Your tutoring session with Ace started the next day. Riddle said that he would like you to tutor Ace in his dorm rather than yours so he can check up on you both once in a while. 
You and Ace both began your session and you started helping him out on some assignments that he has trouble with. Trey would also stop by to bring you two snacks to eat when you guys take a break from studying.
Soon weeks go by and you spend half of your time in the heartsalbyul dorm. Tutoring Ace for those weeks really paid off when he shows you that 90% he got on that re-take. 
"Woah I'm surprised I did a good job teaching you" you say as he showed you his paper.
"Well it looks like you knew what you were doing, offering riddle for you to tutor me" you rolled your eyes and bit into the soft pastry trey made you.
"Well you did a good job" 
You and Ace hung out for a while before you saw that it was getting late and that you needed to be at your dorm. After saying goodbye, you started making your way out. As you were walking out you were stopped by someone calling out your name from behind you.
"Oh riddle! Something wrong?" You ask as he approaches you.
"No. But I would like to thank you for aces tutoring lessons. You did a great job and I would like to thank you"
"Oh! It was nothing really! I just wanted to help out a bit seeing that you looked a little upset last time. I'm honestly surprised Ace managed to pass with my help" You say as you felt yourself getting shy.
Why am I nervous?
"I'd still like to thank you. We're holding an unbirthday party this week. I would like it if you would come, as a thank you for everything you have done…uh especially after my overblot…"
You stared at him for a moment. Heart racing against your chest. You quickly got out of your daze and accepted his offer.
"I'll come then"
"Great, it will be Friday at 4. See you then" 
"O-okay!" You watched as he walk away and you felt like slapping yourself.
"Why was I so nervous?" You questioned yourself as you continued your way back to ramshackles.
-
Ever since that day, you and riddle have gotten closer. He would invite you over to unbirthday parties, invite you for some tea, and even help you out with some classes that you're doing poorly in.
And because of all that. You felt yourself slowly starting to fall in love with the red head tyrant.
And you knew. You knew that you should be careful with who you fall in love with. Because of a stupid family curse, you need to be extra careful with who you fall for.
Your mother was lucky enough that your father loved her very much. And you always dreamed of falling in love with someone who also loves you back so you wouldn't have to worry about that curse.
As day's turn into weeks and weeks turn into months.
You have already fallen deeper for riddle roseheart.
And in those months you were able to form a friendship with the dorm leader of heartsalbyul.
No one knew about your family curse. Not even your close friends the first years. The only thing they knew is your huge crush on ace and deuce dorm leader.
"Yuck, out of everyone here in NRC you chose riddle?" You rolled your eyes at your friend's disgusted expression.
"He is not that bad. Riddle is…nice"
"Nice? Yeah right"
You ignored Ace and continued working on some assignments.
"So when are you even gonna confess to him?" You went stiff when you heard grim question and you could feel everyone's eyes on you.
"Oh.…um well I still don't know yet" 
"You don't know yet? I thought you already had something in mind since you have been crushing on him for the last few months" you chuckle and continue doing your work.
But as you were working, grim question made you think.
When will you confess?
You won't get anywhere if you keep your feelings to yourself.
So you decided to do something about it.
That night. You stayed up thinking how you should tell riddle how you feel. You knew you had to be careful with the decision you were about to make.
Knowing that your life is on the line
That night you slept with fear and hope. Fear because you don't know if riddle is gonna reject you. And hope because he might feel the same way.
The next day came quickly. And you were sure that people could tell you were nervous by the way you were fiddling with the hem of your shirt.
"Are you ok y/n?" Epel's voice pulled you out of your thoughts and you realized that everyone was busy writing down notes.
"Huh?...oh um I'm fine" you say as you grab your pencil and begin writing down the notes on the board.
"You sure? You look nervous"
"I'm fine epel. No need to worry" you say as you give him a soft smile. He wasn't fully convinced but left you alone for now.
You finished all your classes and it was nearing the end of the day. You check your bag to see if the note was still there and smiled when you saw that it was in your bag.
"Ok…now to find riddle"
You started walking around. Trying to find the little redhead and to your surprise you found him.
"Well that was quick" You quickly made your way to him and called out his name.
"Riddle!" He turned around to see you running towards him and you could've swore your heart stopped.
"Y/n, what did I say about running in the halls" 
"Sorry sorry!" 
"Is something wrong?" 
You took a deep breath and took the note out of your bag. You couldn't trust yourself into speaking out your feelings so you decided on writing it down on a piece of paper.
"Uh here…read it"
"What is it?"
"You will know if you read it" 
He sighed and began reading the note. You stood there quietly trying to read his facial expression while he was reading your note. Heart beating none stop while your legs felt like jelly you were scared of the outcome.
Once he finished reading you clenched your fist and avoided eye contact.
"Y/n…" that tone was already starting to make you nervous.
"Y/n…I'm sorry…but I don't feel the same way" 
Those words were enough for you to accept your fate.
"Oh…"
"Y/n look-"
"No, you're fine. Thank you for taking your time on reading this. I'll go now and sorry for wasting your time" you said as you quickly turned around and rushed out of there. 
You could hear him call out your name but you ignored it. Not because you were mad but because you were already starting to feel a burning sensation in your chest.
"Fuck" you whispered as you could feel the pain go through your whole entire body.
"I-I just gotta make it to ramshackles" You whispered out as you made your way there as quickly as possible.
You finally made it and you ran to the closest bathroom. You closed and locked the door as your body trembled from the pain. You whined when you felt something burning in your chest.
When your love isn't returned. Your heart and soul would burn. The pain in a heartbreak would go through not only your heart, but your body also. 
The words of your mother ran through your head. She once said that she would never want something like that to happen to you. The pain being described as awful and torture by past family relatives who were unlucky enough in the love department.
But you once never thought YOU would experience it.
And now. You felt a deep sense of pity for the ones in your family who had to experience something so awful until their last breath.
Your body stops shaking. But the pain was still there, but not as bad as when it first started. 
You stood there thinking. How will you keep this a secret? How would you hide this from the others until your last breath?
"At least I'll die loving him" 
 knock
"Y/n? Are you okay in there?" 
Shit
It Was deuce. And then you heard a couple footsteps coming closer to the bathroom door.
"I-im fine!" You curse yourself when you notice that your voice came out shaky and weak.
"Is that blood?" Jack said.
You froze. You slowly looked up to the mirror and saw blood running down your nose. 
A lot of blood
"Shit"
"We're coming in"
"W-wait! No!" But it was too late and the door opened. You quickly turned around from facing their direction. 
"Y/n"
"Holy shit there's a lot of blood on the floor" at ace words, you slowly looked down to see a puddle of blood by your feet.
"Y/n what the fuck happened?"
"Did someone do this to you?!"
"Oh God you're bleeding so much!" 
Question after question started to slowly give you a headache. You raised your hand up to your face and slowly backed away.
"I'm fine-n-no need to worry!" 
Of course the bathroom looked like a crime scene with the amount of blood on the floor. After all this is the beginning of the curse.
Blood everywhere. Blood will be everywhere making it look like a murder scene. That's what we saw in aunt Gloria's room.
Aunt Gloria. She was one of the victims of this deathly curse 16 years ago. You remember your mom talking about your aunt's death a few years ago when you learnt about the mysterious curse that was in your family bloodline.
So of course you weren't surprised seeing blood everywhere.
"Y/n please tell us what happened" you looked up to see deuce who crouched down to look at your face better. Since you were now sitting on the bloody puddle.
"I-I….it's nothing"
"What do you mean it's nothing?! You have blood coming out of ya nose!" Epel yelled as he started rushing towards you with a cloth to clean the blood off your face.
"Hey, at least tell us what happened!"
"We're worried sick human!" 
Both grim and sebek yell as they also tried to bring in more tissue. 
You sat there as they tried to stop the blood from coming out while also trying to know what happened. You sigh and grab deuce wrist to stop him from holding the tissue to your nose.
"If I tell you guy's….promise to not tell anyone" 
"But-"
"Promise" you said with a harsh tone. They all looked at each other before nodding.
And that's when you told them everything. About the family curse, riddle rejecting you, and now the curse taking effect over your whole body.
And as you told them more and more you could see the horror on their faces. The mere thought of you dying because of getting rejected really scared them to the core.
"So…your dying?"
"Slowly…I'll suffer a slow death but yes I am dying"
By now your nose stopped bleeding and the pain in your chest stopped. But you know that it will come back later.
Deuce and Ace helped you get up from the floor while epel, Jack, and sebek stayed behind to clean off the blood in the bathroom. And grim stared at you worriedly while you guys made your way upstairs.
"That damn jerk, now you gotta suffer all because of him" Ace muttered under his breath while helping you get to your room.
"It's not his fault…"
"Still…now you have to suffer" You felt his hold on you tighten and you felt bad. Deuce was shaking but didn't say anything on the way to your room. 
"I'm sorry"
"For what? You didn't do anything"
"....." You stayed silent. You finally made it to your room and they helped you sit down on your bed.
"For..how long is this going to take?" 
"I don't know…I remember my mom say that it takes up to a month or two for the victim to die" 
 The room went silent. None of them speaking up or asking more questions.
Just pure silence.
After that day. The first year crew made it their mission to be by your side at all cost until your last breath. You of course didn't ignore riddle. You didn't want to make it seem like something was wrong so you'll greet him every now and then when you see him. 
Riddle of course wasn't fully convinced after seeing how weak you got over the past few weeks. Each time he tried to ask what wrong you will either run away or get taken away by one of the first years.
And this made him annoyed. So one afternoon riddle decided to ask a certain blue and red head duo what was going on. 
"Deuce, Ace, may I have a word with you two?"
"Uh sure housewarden riddle"
"Sure"
He could see that the two were in a hurry. Which made him a little suspicious but didn't say anything.
"I've seen y/n hasn't been doing well the past couple weeks" at this, the two first years stiffened. 
"I was wondering if anything is going on. Seeing that you two have been hanging out with the prefect more than usual"
"Oh everything is fine!"
"Yeah! Y/n is just um tired with the tests we had recently!"
"Test?" Riddle said confused.
"Yep!"
"Then why does y/n look…ill?"
"I-"
Before Deuce could say anything, he was cut off by Ace's phone ringing. Ace pick up not caring that his housewarden was literally talking to him.
"W-what?! Okay me and deuce will be right there!"
"What happened-" 
"Y/n…" the moment your name left his mouth deuce ran out the dorm. 
This of course grabbed riddle attention.
"Ace, I demand you give me an explanation on what's happening!"
"I can't right now! I-I have to go!"
"Ace!" He yelled while holding a firm grip on his wrist.
"Fuck y/n is dying okay?! Now let me go!" 
"What?" His hold on Aces wrist loosened and Ace was able to run out the dorm.
The time the heartsalbyul first years got there, they saw the staff members and ambulances in front of ramshackles. They both quickly ran inside, ignoring their teachers yelling after them.
The sight they saw in front of them was something straight out of a nightmare.
There, on the floor laid you with blood everywhere. Jack, sebek, epel were trying to calm down a sobbing grim while the paramedics tried stopping the blood coming out of your nose and mouth.
"W-what the hell happened?!"
"We don't know! We were just about to enter when we heard a scream and when we came in we saw her like this!"
Before any of them could talk further, one of the paramedics yelled out something that made them all freeze on their spots.
"She stopped breathing!"
"There no pulse!"
And when those words were shouted out. There, by the door stood the heartsalbyul housewarden.
"W-what"
Standing by the door…was riddle. Hand over his mouth as tears ran down his face.
Ace screams and was ready to throw a punch at his housewarden but was stopped by Jack and sebek who grabbed ahold of both his arms.
That day riddle learned the truth about you and your curse. 
-
TREY CLOVER
Trey was your childhood best friend along with riddle and che'nya. You four would do almost everything together and would help riddle sneak out once in a while to play with you three.
And of course as every cliche romance book or movie, you ended up falling for your best friend.
You still remember the time you got cheated on by your very first boyfriend and trey was there to comfort you by baking you some warm treats and doing a movie night.
That was when you fell in love with trey clover.
As years went by, you slowly started falling for him more and more. You would bother riddle and che'nya by gushing about trey every chance you get. While che'nya just giggles or laughs, riddle on the other hand is annoyed.
You would talk about how good he looked in class today or talk about something cute he did today and riddle would just stare at you with a deadpan expression. 
"I'll call animal control to come get you"
"No wait! I still haven't told you about what trey did today!"
"And I don't want to know"
"Haha~ you're so lame riddle! Y/n over here just wants to tell us more about her crush!" Riddle sighs and let's you continue and you just squeal as you tell them every detail about today.
And since they know about your crush, they also know about your family curse.
When you first told riddle and che'nya, both of them of course felt bad and che'nya cried for an hour, which resulted in you trying to calm him down. And obviously both were a little worried when you told them about your crush on trey. Worried that something might happen to you.
And you of course reassured them and said that you will be okay.
But deep down you weren't. You feared that trey might not feel the same. Scared that he will reject you. There have been nights where you would cry yourself to sleep. You would wake up to call your mom about nightmares you would get and she would try her best to calm you down and comfort you.
You tried to be positive. Make yourself believe that everything is going to be fine. And fool yourself into believing that you and trey can become something more.
-
Today was a rather boring night. You were bored out of your mind and couldn't fall back asleep. You turned to look at the clock and noticed that it was 2 am.
"Man…I still have a few hours left"
You sigh as you decide to go on your phone. As you were doing that, you suddenly got a notification.
Mischievous catboy⦮⑅⦯
You rolled your eyes when you noticed who just texted you.
Are you up?
The text read. You rolled over on your stomach and quickly texted back a response.
No
You see that he has seen your message. He quickly types back a response.
Woah, didn't know you can sleep type
You snicker at his response and quickly type back.
What do you want
It didn't take long for him to respond back.
Let's go get some take out!
Che'nya…it's literally 2 am
So? That never stopped me before
You thought about it for a moment. You just woke up and can't fall back asleep. So what better than sneaking out and getting free food?
Fine
You got up from your bed and quickly went to put on some sweats and a jacket. You grabbed your phone and saw that he was waiting for you outside.
"What the- guess he has been waiting for a while now"
You quickly but quietly open the door to your room and step out to the hallway. You made sure not to make any noise on your way out of your dorm.
After all, if riddle finds out you snuck out then that will be off with your head.
You soon meet che'nya waiting right outside for you.
"How did you even get in?"
"I have my ways. Now let's go before we get caught by Mr grumpy pants" You both giggle at the name and start making your way out.
"So, when are you confessing to your little boyfriend?" He teases. You scoff and playfully elbowed him.
"He not my boyfriend"
"Yett!"
You rolled your eyes as you both crossed the street.
"But still…I don't know when I'll tell trey about my feelings"
"Do you ever think you'll be able to?" He asks. And that was a good question.
Do you think you will ever be ready to tell him?
"I don't know" 
He noticed the little frown on your face and decided to change the topic.
"It was a pain in the ass to get here"
"How so?"
"I almost got caught by a night guard who patrols around RSA" You laugh as che'nya tells you more about his struggles to get to NRC.
You both continued to chat about whatever came to mind and finally found a good place that was still open at the late hour-or more like early hour.
You and che'nya hung out for a couple of hours before he had to make his way back to RSA. You both bid goodbye and walked your separate ways.
During your walk back to NRC. You thought about what che'nya said earlier.
When will you confess?
You wished you could but you weren't lucky in the love department. You could be at risk at any moment by simply not getting your feelings returned.
And you thought it was stupid.
Stupid for being scared to fall in love. Stupid for having your life at risk if the guy you love doesn't love you back.
You thought the whole thing was stupid.
The time you found out about your curse was the most heartbreaking moment ever in your life.
You were confused on why you didn't fall ill that day when you got heartbroken by your first boyfriend. Only for your mom to tell you that the curse only takes over if you actually truly love someone.
The boy you dated in the past wasn't someone you loved dearly. It was only a one time thing as your mom likes to call it.
So that's why you didn't fall sick. But the love that you have for Trey is totally different from the love that you had for that ex of yours. 
Trey is someone you actually do love. Someone you love dearly to the point that the curse isn't the only thing that will take you away.
So when your mother found out. She told you to be careful. To think before you do anything that you will regret later.
And you thought about it for a while. As the years went by you made sure to think before you act.
And maybe that is what made you do what you did today. You stood right in front of trey door room. You were nervously fidgeting with the bracelet that you had on and were already second guessing if this was a good idea.
But as you were about to back down. The door to trey room suddenly opens leaving you to stay still on your spot.
"Y/n? Need something?" He asks as he looks at you curiously.
"Oh-um actually yeah. There something important I need to tell you"
"Oh really? Well come on in then" he stepped aside to let you in. You took a deep breath before walking in his room.
"What do you need to tell me?" 
"Oh well…"
He pats for you to sit next to him but you kindly decline.
"Actually…It's something that I really wanted to tell you about for a while now"
"Really?"
"Yeah….trey the thing is…" You suddenly felt like your legs were about to give up by how much your legs were shaking.
"The thing is…I have liked you for quite some time now"
You looked anywhere but his face the whole entire time as you were confessing.
"I have liked you ever since middle school. I never told you this because of fear for our friendship" 
You finally looked at him and felt like running out of there by the look on his face.
He looked at you in pity.
"Y/n…."
Shit
"I like you I really do but…not in that way you like me" 
"Oh"
"You're a great person really! But I don't feel-"
"It's fine! No need to apologize or anything" you say with a soft smile. He still looked guilty but you reassured him that you were fine and that you aren't mad.
"I just hope we can still be great friends after this!" You say as he gave you a nod.
"Totally! This won't ruin our years of friendship" You smiled at that before excusing yourself out. The moment you stepped out of his room was when you finally let your tears fall.
You quickly ran to the one person who would know how to calm you down.
"Riddle!" You choked out as you barged into his room unexpectedly causing the poor redhead to jump from the sudden intrusion.
"Y/n what did I tell you about-are you crying?!" He quickly got up from his chair and made his way towards you who was crying hysterically on his bedroom floor.
"What happened?" He said as he tried his best to calm you down.
"I-I finally t-told him and!" That explained everything he needed to know. He sighs as he caresses your back as you sob on his chest.
"I told him and…he doesn't feel the same way"
He didn't know what else to say but let you cry on him. But what made him tighten his hold on you was your fate.
You will fall ill soon
After that day. He noticed how you were slowly starting to get sick.
It wasn't bad yet but riddle and che'nya notice how you would get bad headaches and chest pain.
You also knew what was about to come when that would happen. You tried your best to act as normal as possible but the pain was making it hard.
You tried your hardest to act normal around your friends who didn't know what was going on. Especially trey. He notice how weak you have gotten over the past week. How you would have to excuse yourself to the bathroom every now and then and how he walked in on you throwing up while Carter helped get your hair out of the way.
As time went by, He started to slowly get suspicious of his three friends. He could feel that you three were hiding something from him and that made him a little sad.
He tries to ask riddle or che'nya but everytime he does they either freeze up or try to change the topic.
A month has passed since trey rejected you and now the pain has gotten worse. You could barely even walk without having to grab onto something or someone for support. Blood would occasionally start coming out from your nose and even your mouth. The headaches have gotten worse and now you feel like just ending it all right then and there.
Today wasn't any better. You felt sick and you could barely hold your pencil correctly as you tried to keep up with the notes on the board.
"Hey y/n, are you okay?" You looked to your right to see cater looking at you worriedly.
"Huh?..oh yeah I'm fine"
"You sure?"
"Yeah um I just didn't get any sleep last night" you could see he wasn't fully convinced but he just let it go for now.
As you were writing down the last few sentences, you felt a sharp pain go through your chest and your whole body. You let out a low gasp and drop your pencil.
"Are you oka-y/n you're bleeding!" Cater's voice was muffled as you noticed your vision getting blurry.
Ah it's finally time
You could hear cater going into panic mode as he shook you to stay awake. But even if you tried, you couldn't fight back to keep your eyes open as you slowly started going into a deep sleep.
Riddle was walking back to class after using the restroom only to hear panic erupt from a nearby classroom. He walked past but stopped when he noticed that it was your class and the main cause of the panic.
He quickly rushes in to see the teacher calling the ambulances while students surround a panic cater and you who was bleeding from the mouth and nose.
"Y/n!"
He quickly pushes past the other students and tries to shake you awake. But even as he was calling out your name and trying to wake you up he knew that you were already gone. 
The curse has finally taken you away
"No. Not now…not yet!" He yelled out as he tried to wake you up.
By the loud commotion that was going on in the classroom teachers and other students nearby rushed inside.
One of the students being trey. The moment he saw you and people surrounding you he froze.
"The ambulance is here! Get them here!" 
One student ran past trey to go get the paramedics. All the while he just stood there in shock.
"She's gone…there is no need for them to be here" He heard riddle say as he just held your hand tight.
"How-what even-"
The paramedics finally came in and teachers rushed to pull the students away. Riddle finally let go of your hand before walking out the classroom. 
But not before telling trey about your curse.
"Y/n had a family curse…the day you rejected her love for you was the day the curse finally took over" 
"She died…because of me?"
Riddle didn't say anything and left. 
All trey could do was just stand there and watch as his best friend gets taken away. 
-
CATER DIAMOND
You have liked cater since you two were first years. You would always get so shy and nervous around him at first. But sometime around your 2nd year, you and cater started to talk more.
You remember that you were both paired up for a project for one of your classes and almost passed out when you heard the teacher announce who your partner was.
You remember being so nervous and you would have to have trey calm you down and reassure you that cater won't eat you or anything.
"Y/n~" 
You looked up from your phone to see a very excited cater running up to you.
"Yes?" You said as you put your phone down and gave him your full attention.
"Look how many likes I got from this post!" He said as he excitedly showed you his phone. It was a picture he took the other day when you both went to a new cat Cafe that recently opened up.
"I told you it will blow up" He smiled and took a seat next to you.
"We should go there again some other time. I really liked the pastry there, plus the cute cats"
"We should. How about this weekend?" you suggested as you took a sip of your drink that you bought from a nearby store.
"That sounds good"
You looked at the time and noticed that it was getting pretty late. You got up which grabbed his attention as you picked up your bag.
"Well gotta go. I don't want azul to send floyd to come get me like last time" you say. Shivering at the memory.
"Alright, get there safely!"
"Mhm!"
You began your walk back to octavinelle. Earphones in and humming the song that was blasting through your ears. All you could do on your walk back was think about cater.
Cater, cater, cater~
That is all you would ever think about. The cute Diamond on his cheek, his beautiful hair, and his awesome guitar skills!
By all this thinking you didn't even realize that you made it to the hall of mirrors. You quickly walk to the octavinelle mirror so as to not be late. 
"Your late" 
You jump at the sudden voice that awaited you at the front entrance of your dorm.
"Azul! Man you scared me" He raised a brow and while you tried to calm your beating heart. He sighs as he massages his temple all the while you just gave him an awkward smile.
"You know the rules"
"Oh come on" the look he gave you was enough for you to stop whining and quickly walk in.
"You're lucky you're here. I almost sent floyd to come get you" 
"Please don't"
"Then get here faster. Now come and help out at the lounge"
You just gave him a nod and quickly went to your room to leave your stuff before rushing to the lounge to help out.
Your family curse was no secret to the octotrio. They knew the moment you accidentally blurted it out during a mental breakdown a few months back.
Knowing how they are made you scared at first. Thinking azul would find a way to get you into a contract with this secret of yours. But surprisingly, the octotrio were nice enough to comfort you during that moment. [Mostly jade since azul didn't know what to do while floyd cried]
You consider the trio as younger brothers. Even though you're just a year older you would always tease them about it. So of course the moment they found out they were super worried.
They asked if there was anything that could help change or cure the curse but all you did was give them a sad smile.
You wish there was a cure but sadly there isn't. You remember their sad faces and you didn't know if YOU needed the comfort or them.
And you were glad that they kept this bit of information to themselves rather than using it to blackmail you. They obviously also know your crush on the heartsalbyul 3rd year and would tease you as much as they can when they see you together.
You were wiping down tables when you heard your name being called.
"Shrimpy!" Or nickname.
"Yes floyd?" You smiled as he ran to you before crushing you into a big hug.
"When did you get here?"
"I just got here a few minutes ago. Why? You miss me?" You teased as he just flicked your forehead.
"No"
"Suree"
"Y/n, floyd, get back to work" You heard jade say.
"You heard your brother"
"Ughh" 
You giggle before continuing back on cleaning the tables.
The evening went by a little faster than usual and you guys managed to close up early. You made your way back to your room and took a quick shower before going to bed.
"Ahh~ today was tiring" You say as you curl up on your bed. You grabbed your phone and went on magicam to stalk your crush profile.
You saw a recent pic of him and his band mates from the light music club posing while the caption read "finishing up practice early◇" 
You giggle and like the picture before exiting out the app. You decided to call it a night and go to sleep.
Unaware of tomorrow's events
-
Class was over and you were making your way to the cafeteria. You were a little tired since you didn't get much sleep last night. You kept waking up because of a weird dream you had but you didn't pay any mind to it.
You took a seat and started eating while trying your hardest to stay awake.
"Tired?" 
"Mm?" You look up to see azul and the tweels. 
"Oh…yeah didn't get much sleep"
"How so?"
"Mm just had a weird dream. Kept waking me up, nothing serious"
"Oooo is shrimpy getting nightmares~?" Floyd teased and you scoff.
"No. It was just a weird dream, no nightmare" Floyd laughs as he continues to tease you.
"Okay that enough floyd"
"Aww you're no fun"
You four chatted for a while before the bell rang. Signaling that it was time to go.
"Oh and one more thing!" 
"Yes?"
"You'll be in charge of taking orders today"
"Azul!"
"No complaining"
"Mannn" 
"Tuff luck shrimpy hehehe~" You rolled your eyes before quickly walking to your next class.
It was Friday meaning it will be extra busy at the mostro lounge. The day ended quickly and you were the first one to leave the class since you wanted to beat the others to the lounge first.
But as you were walking, you saw cater in the halls which cause you to smile and run over to him.
"Cater!" He turned around and smiled when he saw you.
"Oh y/n! Are you heading to the lounge?"
"Mhm! Azul said I have to take orders today though" You were still mad about that since you hate taking orders.
"Man that must suck"
"It really does"
You noticed that he wasn't heading back to his dorm so you curiously asked him where he was going.
"Oh I'm also heading to the mostro lounge"
"Really?"
"Yep. I want to try out their new menu that they have today"
"Ohh"
"Well let's go before your late"
"Right right!"
You both began your walk to the lounge in peaceful silence-well mostly you while you listened to cater rant about his day.
But while you two were walking your mind kept drifting off to you and him in a relationship. You could feel the tip of your ears burn as you imagine what it would be like to be in a relationship with him. 
You kept thinking about when you would have the guts to tell him how you feel and because of that you didn't realize what you blurted out until it was too late.
"I like you"
"And then-huh?" You froze as your heart began beating against your chest and feeling like the world stopped.
"Oh…uh I-"
"Oh y/n…" 
Oh no…I know that tone
"I'm sorry but-"
"Oh uh Look! We made it to the lounge! W-well I have to go now!"
"I- wait!"
You were gone.
You quickly rushed into the lounge with tears threatening to fall at any moment. You put your things away and quickly got to work. You tried your best to write down the orders and not cry like a baby in front of the customers but it was getting hard with cater in the lounge.
You really didn't want to take his order after what happened so you ordered one of the other students to take it while you were busy with another table.
"Y/n" 
You turned to meet azul eyes and he instantly knew something was wrong.
"Meet me at the back"
"I'm fine azul, I-"
"Y/n" You sighed and gave the notebook and pen to the student that azul called over to take your place.
You both walked to the back and he made you sit down and tell him what was wrong. 
That was when you finally broke down.
"I-I messed up! I told cater that I liked him but he- he doesn't feel the same!" His eyes softened and he took a seat next to you. He didn't know what to say so he spent the entire time calming you down as you cried on his shoulder. 
He let you go early so you can rest and had someone take your place for the day. You were able to sneak past cater as azul told one of the students to distract him.
You silently made your way back to your dorm and mentally slapped yourself for slipping up and telling him.
"Fucking stupid'' you muttered as you open the door to your room.
You ignored cater after that. You felt embarrassed but most of all hurt. You switched your seat and made sure to not make contact with him in any way.
Cater of course was hurt by this. He tried to talk to you but you never answered his messages or calls and the twins would make sure he wouldn't be near you.
He tried everything he could but nothing. You didn't want to talk to him and the tweels made sure he wouldn't get near you.
A few weeks passed and he noticed that you haven't been attending classes lately. This obviously made him think something was wrong. He tried to get ace to talk to floyd during basketball practice but the first year always comes back with nothing.
He tried asking azul but then went against it knowing the boy wouldn't tell him.
Until one night, when he heard noises coming from the the heartsalbyul lounge. He quietly gets out of his room and makes his way to the lounge to see both riddle and trey talking.
"Did azul tell you?"
"Yes…he said she was getting worse but I didn't know it will go this bad"
Cater brows furrowed as he continued to listen closely.
"And how is she now?" Trey went silent and looked down on the floor.
"She sadly…didn't make it"
"What?!" 
"Quiet down before someone hears!"
"S-sorry but…y/n didn't make it??!"
At this cater quickly comes out of his hiding spot which startled the two boys.
"What do you mean she didn't make it?"
"I-I…" trey avoided eye contact which caused cater to get mad.
"What do you mean trey?" Both of them were silent until trey spoke up.
"Y/n…has been sick for a while"
"And she hasn't been feeling well"
"And azul just called and said that…she passed away"
His eyes widened and he covered his mouth in shock. Not believing it.
"H-how?!"
This time riddle spoke up.
"Because you rejected her love for you"
"Y/n had a curse going on in her family that kills them if the person they love doesn't love them back"
"She…dead?"
Cater's heart broke that night as he drowned in the guilt of your death. 
-
ACE TRAPPOLLA
Ace and deuce were the first friends you ever made when you came to twisted wonderland. You felt nice having at least someone to talk to and hang out with as Crowley "tries" to find a way for you to go back home.
But even as the months went by you started to slowly make new friends during your stay in twisted wonderland. Crowley still hasn't found a way to send you back home but you weren't upset about it. You felt kinda…glad in a way to be able to stay here longer.
And why is that?
Because you fell for Ace trappolla.
You didn't know when your feelings for the trouble making first year bloom but all you know is that you love him.
His eyes, smile, jokes, and that cute heart on his eye has you squealing like a middle school girl.
You like how he flirts with you when you guys and the other first years would hang out. You would flirt back and it would just be you and Ace flirting back and forth as the others just get annoyed by the two of you.
Deuce, epel and grim would be the victims who would have to suffer hours of you gushing about Ace when they come over.
Which is what you were doing now.
"He looked so cool during basketball practice!" You say as deuce just nods while epel makes a gagging face along with grin.
"Ew gross"
"Your totally going boy crazy"
"Am not!" You say as you throw your pillow at epel.
"Just confess already! I'm getting tired of hearing you talk about Ace all the time and I have to hear about him everyday back at the dorm" Deuce sighs as he flops face first on your bed.
"As if it that easy" 
"What? Scared he'll reject you?" Epel teases and you throw another pillow in his direction.
"No! It's just…I- okay maybe yes" 
"I don't get what you're so afraid of. I mean Ace always flirts with you every chance he gets so that might be a sign he into you" 
"Yeah! He's definitely hitting on you with all that flirting!" 
"They're right!" 
You sat there unsure about the whole thing. You didn't want to get your hopes up and possibly embarrassed yourself and ruin everything.
"Mm…still not sure"
"Don't get too stressed about it y/n. You can always decide when you know he feels the same" You smiled at deuce before nodding.
"Yeah…you're right"
"Well can we go watch a movie now?"
"Yeah! I just want to eat snacks instead of talking about crushes!" You rolled your eyes and grabbed the bag of snacks from off the floor.
"Fine fine"
-
"So did anyone do the homework for professor trein class?" Ace asked the moment you guys sat down.
"Uhh yeah and your not getting the answers"
"Oh C'mon man!"
"You should've done it" you say as you were eating your food.
"I was busy"
"Busy with what?" Jack said with a confused look.
"I was busy okay? And plus I fell asleep during his lecture so I'm pretty lost"
"Well that sounds like a you problem" He groans before sitting down and taking a bite of his meal. 
"You guys are mean"
You chuckle and continue eating your food while the rest talk amongst themselves. 
-
The day went by quickly and you along with grim started making y'alls way back to ramshackles. You were pretty tired and wanted nothing more than to lay on your bed and sleep. 
"Ahh finally back!" 
You both made your way upstairs and grim plops down on the bed while you started working on the homework for one of your classes.
But while in the middle of doing your homework your mind started to wander off. 
No one knew about your family curse, not even your closest friends. And if Ace were to ever reject you then what? How could you possibly go on about your day in pain? Not trying to look suspicious or make it look like something is wrong.
All these were starting to make you feel sick. The anxiety was all too much for you.
You sigh and decide to finish your homework tomorrow morning. For now you will just shower and get some rest. 
It Was 5 am and you couldn't get any sleep throughout the whole night. You kept tossing and turning which made grim wake up and get mad at you for disturbing his sleep.
You sigh and get up to get ready for the day. You started working on the homework you couldn't finish to pass by time until school starts.
Ding
You looked at your phone and saw that you got a message from the group chat you and the first years created.
Guys hurry to the lunch room after class
It was from Ace. You then started typing back a response as the others got online.
Why?
Because I have something to tell you all!
Tell us what exactly?
You will know when I tell you in the cafeteria
You didn't know why but his message gave you a bad feeling. You shrugged it off and noticed that it was almost time until classes started so you quickly woke up grim to get ready for the day.
-
Lunch rolled around fast and you,Deuce, grim and epel quickly walked in the lunchroom to meet up with the others. You spotted them and you four made your way to the table.
"Ah finally!"
"Okay let's get this shit over with, what do you want to tell us?"
Ace took a deep breath before letting it out.
"I got a girlfriend!" 
It felt like time stopped and your smile almost went away but you quickly composed yourself before congratulating him.
"That good ace!" It wasn't good.
"That's nice but did you really have to make it a big deal?" Jack asked.
"Yeah you made it look like an emergency" Ace rolled his eyes at sebek.
"Of course it was an emergency! I scored myself a beautiful girlfriend!" You clenched your fists and quickly got up from your seat grabbing everyone's attention.
"I have to go use the restroom, I'll be right back"
And you quickly ran out of the cafeteria with tears spilling out. Grim ran after you while both deuce and epel excused themselves.
"I forgot something in the classroom, I'll be right back!"
"Yeah same!"
Both then quickly ran out the doors of the cafeteria and went to look for you.
After what seemed like years they finally found you and grim in an empty classroom.
"Oh y/n…" epel closed the door as deuce started comforting your crying figure.
"I-Im fine…I shouldn't make a big deal out of this!" You say as more tears started sliding down your cheeks.
"W-we didn't know he had a girlfriend!" Epel says as he tries to also comfort you.
"It's fine epel…I should just forget about it and move on"
But you couldn't. You loved Ace and now that he has a girlfriend you feel dead inside.
This is now the beginning of the curse
In a month, you already started feeling very sick and weak. You couldn't go a day without your heart arching in pain. 
While your friends went about their day clueless about this whole situation you suffered in silence.
You told grim at some point and he did everything he can to help ease your pain. But you just got worse overtime. You started eating less, not getting enough sleep, and getting more frequent nose bleeds.
You tried to stay strong but it was getting to be too much for you. 
Until one day you gave up.
"Y/n!" Everyone in the cafeteria turned to look as you collapsed to the ground and your friends hurriedly surrounded you in panic. Nose bleeding and you not responding had everyone in the lunchroom running out to get help.
"Someone call the ambulance!"
"Y/n wake up! Wake up!"
As this was going on grim just watched everything unfold and he knew what just happened.
You were gone…
-
DEUCE SPADE
You liked deuce because he was so kind and funny. He would do anything to help his friends and wants to make his mom proud. And all that caused you to fall in love with him.
Just everything about him made you feel like a fool in love.
Poor ace would have to suffer the hours of you fawning over his friend and dorm mate.
"Gah, at this point your head over heels for deucey deuce" 
"I am" You said with awe as you continued to talk about him more.
"Say, I can be your wingman!" 
"Huh"
"I can help you get with deuce!" This piques your interest and you give it a good thought.
"Hey…that not bad" 
"I'll basically play cupid" He pretended to have an arrow and shoot it at you with a wink.
"Easy!"
"Still not sure"
Before he could say anything, he was interrupted by your bedroom door being opened.
"Hurry up and come downstairs! The movie is about to start!" Epel shouts as he then quickly makes his way downstairs.
"Well let's hurry before they start it without us"
"Oo I smell something good downstairs! Move!" You scoff as he pushes past you and runs downstairs.
"Rude"
Your family curse was something you hated for years. Not being able to love more than once and then dying right after was harsh.
You hated it every time your father warned you to be careful. You just wanted to be normal. Being able to love someone without fearing for your life. You always dreamed about the perfect fairytale love life that you see in movies or cartoons. You always felt jealous of the girls your age back in your world who could love anyone they want or get rejected or heartbroken without dying. 
Even if they do get heartbroken or rejected they can always move on. But you, you can't do that. One simple no and you're dying of heartbreak.
And you hate it
The only one you trust with this is Ace and Jack. They were the first ones to know when you accidentally blurted it out during a group project.
Those two kept your curse a secret and would always comfort you while you would cry about how unfair your life is.
But even with this curse, you still smile and have hope for you and deuce.
-
"Did we lose him?!" Ace whispered shouted as you both were currently hiding in some bushes.
"I think so" You took a deep breath before letting it out and calming your breathing.
"I knew I shouldn't have come visit your basketball practice"
"Hey!" 
"Shh, quiet down! He might be nearby" You both stayed silent until you felt a hand on your shoulder.
"Ow! Ace let go of my shoulder!"
"What? You let go of me!"
"I'm not even grabbing your shoulder!"
"I'm not either!"
You suddenly gasp when you notice that it wasn't ace's hand. You both slowly looked up to see floyd giving you both a creepy smile.
"Gotcha~"
"AHH!"
"Floyd! Stop scaring the first years!" 
"Aww c'mon Jamil! It's fun!" The scarabia vice housewarden sighs as he pulls floyd away from you two.
"Sorry about that. Floyd can be too much sometimes" He apologies while you just awkwardly rubbed your arm.
"It's fine!"
"Hey how come you ain't apologizing to me?!"
Jamil gives him a deadpan look before dragging both floyd and ace back to practice.
"Sorry once again!"
You smiled as you see ace whine while floyd just makes fun of him.
"Dorks"
You decided it was time to go back to ramshackles since you needed to clean a bit and cook food for you and grim. You finally made it back and as you were about to open the door, the door slams opened.
"Finally!"
"Were you waiting for me?" You ask as you walk past him.
"Huh? No!"
He follows after you as you make your way to the kitchen.
"Where were you anyway?"
"I thought I told you?"
"You didn't"
"I went to watch ace basketball practice. Which went wrong" 
"What why?" You started searching for any ingredients you have laying around to make something for the both of you.
"Ace thought it was a good idea to prank floyd which went wrong and so we spent a good 10 minutes running and hiding from floyd"
He was silent for a moment before letting out a loud laugh that made you jump.
"Haha! That's what you guys get!"
"It was all Ace okay?!" 
He just continues to laugh as you start to heat up in embarrassment.
"Shut up!"
As he continues to laugh you suddenly receive a message. You grab your phone and see that Kamil texted you.
Hii y/n! I just wanted to let you know that I'm hosting a party this week and I want you and grim to come!
You smile before quickly texting back.
Hii Kamil! And I'll definitely be at that party!
Awesome! I can't wait to see you! Oh! And it will be at 6!:D
"Who was it?"
"Kamil. He hosting another party this weekend and he invited us" 
"Yahoo! We'll definitely be there!" He cheered as he then starts talking about all the food that was going to be there. You playfully rolled your eyes and continued looking for ingredients for tonight's meal.
-
It Was finally Friday and you couldn't wait for the party tomorrow. You were in your last class of the day along with epel and sebek.
"Eh?! Vil is not letting you go?"
"No. All because I said that his makeup didn't look good today" You had your hand covering your mouth trying not to laugh while sebek just let out an annoyed sigh.
"I'm still going though!"
"Course you would"
"Epel, y/n, quiet down" You apologize while epel scowl. You both continued talking but whispering to not get called out again. Class finished and you all went separate ways.
"Grim!" You say when you see your furry companion coming out of his class.
"Let's go home! I'm tired"
"When are you not tired" you say as you carry him back to ramshackles.
-
Saturday night came by fast and you were already done getting ready for kalim party. A knock downstairs made you quickly add finishing touches before going to see who was at the door.
You opened the door to see the adeuce duo standing in front of you. 
"Finally! We were- oh wow, you look nice" 
"Thank you"
"You look pretty y/n" Deuce said which gave you butterflies.
"Thanks deuce"
"Well let's hurry before we're late" You nod before going to go get your furry friend.
"Grim! We're about to leave!"
"I'm here!" Once grim was there you all made your way to scarabia.
-
The party was amazing. The moment you got there you would've swore your eardrums pop by the loud music that was playing all over the dorm. Kalim greeted you all and said to have fun before running to go dance.
You met up with the others and you all had fun. You enjoyed yourself and would get pulled to go dance with your friends.
But that happiness didn't stay for long. You notice that Ace and deuce were nowhere to be found so you excuse yourself to go look for them.
You made your way down the halls of scarabia looking for the two until you finally found them talking in one of the balconies.
"So what do you think of y/n?" You stop when you hear your name and decide to eavesdrop.
"Huh what do you mean?"
"I mean how do you feel about y/n? Any romantic feelings" He says while wiggling his eyebrows. Deuce just scoffs and playfully punches his arm.
"No. I just see y/n as a friend. Maybe even a sister" the moment he said that your heart dropped. Ace's face went pale when he saw you behind one of the pillars listening to their conversations and he started to stutter.
"O-oh! Okay uhhh soo no romantic feelings?"
"Dude, I already said no. Plus I already like someone" his eyes widened even more and he looked at deuce than back to you. He could see you looked heart broken by that and he felt shitty when he saw you run away.
"Oh! Okay great um well I have to go soo bye!" 
Deuce was left confused but he shrugged it off before walking back downstairs to where the party was being held.
You ran out of scarabia as tears ran down your face. You couldn't believe it. Not only did he see you as a friend but a sister?! And what's worse is he likes someone too!
Your heart couldn't handle all this as you ran back to your dorm. You made it back and quickly ran to your room. You plop down on your bed and just sob onto your pillow as you finally let it all out.
Not even 5 minutes later you heard the door from your dorm slam open and footsteps rushing up the stairs and to your room.
"Y/n!" 
Ace quickly makes his way to you and gently strokes your back as you cry on your pillow even more. You could tell ace wasn't the only one with you when you felt Jack tail.
"What even happened?" Ace sighs and starts telling him about the situation. Jack was disappointed to say the least but also tried calming you down.
-
After that night, you went into a deep depression. You ignored everyone and didn't speak or make contact with anyone. You were heartbroken and all you wanted was to be left alone.
But the one person you mainly ignored was deuce. You didn't speak or even look at him as the days went on. He was confused and worried that he may have done something wrong. The others except for ace and jack were also worried and wondered what happened that made you so distant.
Ace and Jack both knew what was happening and tried their absolute best to help you. They were there when you started growing weaker as the days passed by. You felt your chest hurt and body grow weak as your curse started to fully take effect. You would be found throwing up blood and have frequent headaches that made you want to end it all.
You couldn't do it. The pain was too much. And both ace and jack knew that. They saw how tired you were getting and they knew it was a matter of time before you were gone.
The pain in your heart was everything your family described. Horrible, torture, and hell.
All you ever wanted in life was to be normal and find true love. But guess you were never lucky in life.
You cried as you noticed your vision getting blurry and you couldn't breathe any longer. The pain was too much for your poor little heart to handle. 
And so you finally accepted your fate.
"Is everything okay? You've been in the bathroom for a while now. And I have to brush my teeth!"
But no answer. Grim couldn't stay patient for long and opened the door.
"I'm coming in! Henchmen what is taking you so- Y/n?" The moment he sees you laid down in the ground he frowns.
"This isn't funny y/n" He goes up to you and the moment his paw makes contact with your face he froze.
"Cold"
-
The staff and ambulances were called to ramshackles after grim let out a loud scream. Seeing the commotion that was happening outside of ramshackles had students outside to see what was going on.
"Grim!" The first years quickly ran to grim who was shaken up by what he saw in the bathroom.
"What happened?!" 
"Are you okay?!"
"Are you hurt?!"
"Where y/n?"
He ignored everyone and just curled up in the blanket that one of the paramedics gave him.
But two first year students already had an idea about what just happened and all they could do was stare at the ground.
"She gone…"
-
The end♡
Anyway hope you guys like this! I had to write each character in different days cuz I was being lazy😓
546 notes · View notes
abrcmswrld · 2 years ago
Text
The Night in Question
Edward Nashton x Coworker!Reader
━━━━━
Word Count: 5,271
Warnings: smut (18+ only MDNI), stalking, murder/violence, unprotected sex, angst and fluff and smut, edward’s inner thoughts and grievances
Summary: As the two of you grow closer, Edward grapples with the choices he’s made and his wants.
Authors Note: This is essentially just Edward’s point of view of the events that took place in Talk To Strangers. However there’s more scenes in this that weren’t in TTS so don’t worry it’s not a total retelling. I worked on this all of spring break,, I hope you all enjoy!
Ao3 Link
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He can remember the first time your eyes met his. It's a distinct moment in his brain. He had been warned of the newcomer that would be entering the building in the coming days, but he didn't expect it to affect him much. Different department, not his problem. 
And you were significantly more cheerful than he expected. He had expected another temp, desperate for money, but hating the job. But when you made your way to his desk and held out your hand with a bright smile on your face, he could see the motivation on your face. 
He figures this will fizzle out. It did for him. Gone were the years that brought him hope for a better life and possibly more opportunities. But this was it. A lifeless job, a lonely apartment, and an emptiness he can't escape. 
He never held disdain towards you. He silently hopes that you know that. He simply felt nothing towards you for that first little while. Although, he simply felt nothing towards anyone. But the time would come when that little spark in his chest would grow.
━━━━
So when you approach his desk to call out his disregard, it catches him off guard. He thought for sure you had seen him just as all the others had. A pushover. A nobody. Not worth getting to know. But here you were, practically begging for his attention. And yes, he was willing to give it. 
"I think you think you're smarter than everyone else here." He doesn't flinch at the hand you plant on his desk. Only sighs and tries to fight back a smile, because you're right. He does think he's smarter than the people who work there. Zach is a prick and an idiot. The boss doesn't give a shit about any of the people working here. Nobody sees the world the way that he does. 
"I do. Is that so bad?"
"It makes you an asshole."
There it was. The true feelings coming out. He had to give it to you for being honest. Most hide their disdainful nature behind a mocking tone. But you were upfront with him. It's the first time he's seen you this honest and outspoken. And he likes it. He craves to see more of it. He wants to pick apart the pieces of your life and watch you put them back together━ just for him.
"Better to be an asshole than to be an idiot." 
He stares at you as you work through a stunned expression before he hears a short chuckle that lights up his soul. "I guess you're right."
He can't help the smirk that's plastered on his face as you walk away. 
━━━━
That's the first night that he follows you home. He knew it was wrong, he knew that it was creepy, but he set a pace slower than yours and lingered behind you still, hood over his head. It is almost as if he is outside of his own body, watching himself. Going through the motions. He reminds himself that he is not those criminals on the streets. He wouldn't sweep you into the Iceberg Lounge, get you drunk, and take advantage of you. No. He'd never hurt someone like you. 
You're disgusting, Edward. 
He watched you enter your apartment. He should leave now. You're inside and safe nobody got to you. But he doesn't believe it quite yet, so he stands and observes the windows above searching until he can see you clearly through the pane of glass. He sighs a breath of release. He can see you sit your bag down and roll out the tension in your shoulders. Your heels come off and then you're yanking the curtains shut. 
He averts his eyes out of instinct once he spots the slight crack the curtain doesn't cover. 
This is wrong, Edward. 
But he can't help but let his eyes travel what he can see in the crack. Your bare legs, a flash of a bare hip. You look so soft even in such small glimpses. He can't help the heat that rushes through him. 
Why are you here, Edward?
And then you pull the curtains open again slightly. He watches as you settle into your bed, the only light is tiny lamp illuminating the features of your face perfectly for him. He can see you so clearly from this angle. The expression you hold is nothing like the cheerful nature you attempt to hold in the office. It's raw. He can tell you're processing a long day. 
He's been there. Almost every night actually. The thoughts are inescapable. He's always there, in that godforsaken cot. He will never escape the pain of the rats sinking their jagged teeth into his skin. He can still hear the cries of the freezing infants. He can see tears dripping off the bridge of your nose and onto the sheets below your head. 
He wonders if you feel that same emptiness he feels. Could you see him? Could you see into his soul and touch him in a way he's never experienced? He can feel the roses growing into his lungs and the fire that is lit in his heart. He would tear this city apart if it meant he could keep you alive and happy. 
━━━━
He can't hide the way that your company brings him a sense of joy. He's lacked a companion all these years and it's nice to be able to eat lunch with someone. To talk about something other than the paperwork that needs to be filed or accounts that need to be looked into. It makes him feel oddly normal. He can forget about the corruption that plagues the city for a moment. He can forget about the empty orange bottles in his bathroom cabinet that he refuses to get refilled.
It's comfortable. Something he hasn't experienced in his whole life. For a while he thought experiencing comfort may be something that doesn't exist. At least not for people like him. Maybe that's why he enjoys your presence so much. You don't know his past, or where he comes from. There's nothing for you to judge. You're forced to see him with zero prejudice. 
It's not like the topic hadn't come up, though. It had, and he had always done his best to steer you away from the truth. He thinks back to a conversation he had with you during one of your lunchbreaks. The conversation turned uncomfortably close to family. 
Family. 
A word he had never connected with. A concept that was never familiar to him. A negative space in his knowledge of society. You had confided in him about wanting more for yourself. You didn't see yourself in this office for your whole life, but you needed the money with nowhere else to go and nobody else to rely on. And when he had asked if your family was absent you had responded:
"No, I mean they were supportive in my school days, but...I don't think things are that great between us anymore."
He's desperate to keep the conversation focused on you. "Did something happen?"
You laugh. "Nothing major. After high school they wanted me to go to college, get a good degree, marry someone, and settle down."
You meet his eyes. "At that time that sort of life felt like a scam. But, now I kind of wonder if I would've been better off."
He tries to imagine filling that role. Bringing you flowers, meeting your parents, being the boy that they'd love their child to reproduce with. But the universe hadn't been kind enough to him to set your paths to cross sooner. It had never been kind enough to give him any of the things that might fill the void inside of him. Perhaps he had sinned while he was still in his mother's womb. Perhaps that's why she had given him up, she could see that he was tainted from the start. 
Your eyes meet his. "What about you? You got any family in town?" It's the part of the conversation he'd been simultaneously dreading and trying to avoid. "I-" He can't even finish his sentence. I have nobody. He thinks.
"Shit- I was sup posed to call this client. Um, let's finish this talk later." He quickly grabs up his trash and leaves the break room.
━━━━
You hadn't asked about it after he had hastily left the breakroom. He silently appreciated it. He's sure you wondered, but you were now too uncomfortable to ask. And honestly that didn't matter to him as long as it meant he could still be worthy of your presence. As long as you still brought him coffee every morning and greeted him with your brightest smile. Like he meant the world to you. 
The soft hand that grabs his as he starts to head home startles him at first. But he loosens up as he turns to meet your soft expression. He notices how quickly you had yanked your hand from his, as if its burned to touch. He waits for you to speak first. "I- um- Sorry, I was just gonna see if you had plans now." He feels those flames in his chest again. Just as he had the night he watched you through the window. 
"There's a diner on the corner near here. I think they have decent pie."
And for a second he lets his mind roam. He wants so badly to say yes. He could say yes, abandon any plan he has going for him and his followers right in this moment, but he's in too deep. It would be selfish to get you involved. He'd rather fall for you from a distance in an effort to keep you safe. He would take all of the falls for you, even if you never knew the truth. 
"Oh. I'm actually sort of drowning in... paperwork right now." He tries to avoid your eyes. He hates thinking you may feel hurt from his words. "I'm sorry." 
He can hear the pang of rejection in your laugh before you respond. "Oh no! It's totally fine, I probably have paperwork to finish too." He meets your eyes one more time before you take off. "I'll see you tomorrow."
━━━━
He knew you wouldn't see him the next day. Of course he hadn't mentioned that. He wonders if you will miss him while he's gone as he climbs through the skylight of Don Mitchell's home. It's quiet, but he can hear the television and the faint sound of a phone call in the distance. That's when he sees him, his target. The man who had promised so much, yet delivered nothing to the people who needed it the most.
What a disgusting man.
Mitchell is debating on the phone about the upcoming election. Of course he has plans to stay in office, another couple of years to do absolutely nothing. He doesn't want to hear it anymore. 
He's disgusting. Filthy. Kill him, Edward. 
So he does. He lets his body crash into the man until he can force the carpet tucker into the man's head multiple times. He doesn't even know how many times he's hit him at this point. It's almost like he has blacked out. Just the crunch of bones and squelch of flesh ringing in his ears. But he comes to when the man underneath him stops squirming.
He's high off adrenaline and his mind is racing, but he can only imagine what you would think about him if you had seen him in this moment. He straddles the man and imagines you were there, right in front of him. Looking down at the mess he's made. And he can imagine your smile. 
It makes his body hot, and he lets his head fall back as he closes his eyes and lets the feeling sink in. He can hear your voice in his head.
Good boy, Edward. You've done such good for this city.
He can't help but let out a sigh of relief, because yes he wanted to be good for you. He can imagine The Bat standing right there next to you, and god- it's everything. The feeling of being loved and admired is everything to him, and he craves to feel it more. But it would have to wait. 
━━━━
Confidence is flowing through him as he arrives back to KTMJ after his three day absence. He was sick. Or at least that's what he had told his boss to give himself enough time to make sure that everything was still in order and going according to plan. He can't wait to see you. He hopes you'd forgive him for his absence and he can see that you do as you smile slightly seeing him walk in. You inform him of what he had missed around the office as well as the passing of the city's mayor. He only raises an eyebrow in an attempt to feign shock at the situation. 
"No but seriously where were you? I started to wonder if that psychopath got you too."
He smiles. He could look past your judgement for a moment because you cared about him and his well being. You worried about him in the same way he had worried about you. The same feeling that had provoked him to follow you home and watch you through your window. He smiles. "Just sick. November weather and all."
But the judgement soon became hard to overlook. You were visibly shaken at the news as the days went on. He had been doing all of this for you. He dreamed of creating a place where you no longer had to struggle and yet you were fearful of his actions. He can see this as you approach his desk and hold a hand to your forehead. 
"Sorry. I needed to get out of that." You gesture to the other side of the room where a group of coworkers were watching the latest news broadcast. "The news?" He inquires quietly.
"Yeah. It's a little too much for me to stomach." He hesitates for a moment. "They were pricks. Don't you think they kind of deserved it?"
He doesn't understand. Pete Savage was dead. It was a good thing. 
He was a pest.
"I think they were still people with families." 
All he can do is frown as you walk away. He'd fucked up.
━━━━
So he swallows his pride and apologizes after work ends for the day. It was too much to bring to you so quickly. He would have to give you time to adjust. You replied with a curt "It's fine." and keep your eyes from meeting his. 
Your body language towards him is uncomfortable and it's driving him up the walls. He wants things to be the way they were before, with you naturally gravitating towards him. He misses you. He lights a cigarette and takes a puff. It's a bad habit, but it's better than some of his other coping mechanisms. He decides to break the silence.
"And I'm sorry for last week."
He releases the tension in his shoulders when you finally look at him. 
"I've had a lot going on, and it feels a little unfair to bring you into all of that."
"This feels like an excuse to let me down easy. It's okay if you just don't want to go on a date-"
He can't stand to hear you speak any longer. So he steps forward and plants his lips on yours. It's so warm. Once again he has the opportunity to feel normal. He could stay like this forever, but opts to pull back to gauge your reaction. He leaves his free hand on your face. "It's not an excuse. Things are just complicated for me right now." He's telling the truth for once. He hopes you believe him. 
He watches you process for a moment, slowly. And then you press a kiss on the corner of his lips, and he's a goner. 
"When you're ready."
━━━━
It was easy for him to pick the lock of your window, and he can't help but get a little giddy as he pulls himself through the threshold and plants his feet onto the hardwood floor of your bedroom. You're not home, but it smells like you. 
So intoxicating, he thinks. 
He lets his finger glide across the framed photos on your nightstand. Who are these people to you? Do they care about you? Do they see you the way he does? His fingers stop at the handle of the nightstand drawer. Hesitation sets in.
He had seen you bare, and yet he hesitates at opening the drawer. He wonders how many people you've slept with. How many people had seen you vulnerable the way he had. He wonders how many names you've moaned in that bed. Did you keep the drawer equipped for a one night stand? He skips the drawer. 
He slips a glove off of one hand and feels the plush fabric of your bed. It smells like your shampoo. It's a pleasant scent that he had grown all too familiar with as you leaned into him at work. 
"I think the answer might be 'desire'."
He perks up and faces you. "Hm?" You smile. "Number 9, down. 'To want.' It's desire." You lean over to lay a finger onto the page. He stutters.
"Right. Thanks." 
A part of him wishes you were here and under the sheets. He closes his eyes under the mask and lets himself imagine it. He imagines what it would be like if you had let him in, if you had kissed him, if you had told him how incredible he looked. How imposing. He imagines a scenario in which you can accept him for it. 
He can't help the hand that travels to palm his erection over his pants. That little voice in his head is encouraging. Just do it. They're out. They may not even be coming back. Or maybe they'll come back with someone else to take to bed. Mark your territory.
He pulls the latch of his belt open. It feels so wrong as he pictures your soft face focusing on paperwork at your desk. What would you think of him in this moment if you saw him? Would you be disgusted? Kick him out? Call him pathetic?
God, he'd give anything for you to just step on him. Just to call him pathetic.
His cock is already weeping when he gets it out of his pants. He keeps his strokes quick and tight. He can see you in the bed in front of him. He pictures the way your lips would feel wrapped around the tip of his aching erection. He wonders if it would feel as warm as his chest feels when he sees your smile. He'd do anything for you. 
His orgasm comes quick and has whimpers racking through him. He falls to his knees on the hardwood floor and attempts to catch his breath before finally eyeing the spurts of cum that paint the front of his shirt and fist. He sighs.
You're pathetic, Edward. 
━━━━
It becomes another one of his bad habits after that. It's wrong, he knows this. But it's even more thrilling when he can tell that you know. He can see it in your movements that you can feel him watching. It goes from frightening you to electrifying you. You used to hide under the sheets and squeeze your eyes shut. But you've quit closing the curtains before you climb into bed.
He's simply protecting you. Who's to say some creep won't try to claim you as their own. He'd never let it happen. And if you could get as much joy out of it as he could, why not?
He justifies it to himself as he watches you pull down your work tights slowly. In full view in the window, the moonlight hitting you perfectly, and god- he wants to claim you as his own. He watches as you arch your back. It's a shame he can't hear your moans through the glass from this distance. But it fuels his imagination well enough. 
He can picture taking you from behind, up against the window he's watching you through. He wants the whole world to know that you're his. Yet, he always wants to hide you away and never share with anyone. He wonders if you'd like it with his mask on, or if you'd prefer to see him vulnerable to you. His fingers are itching to touch you and it's torture to watch you come to your end without him. 
He wants so many things from you. It's selfish. Your body is beautiful, but he also wants your soul. He pictures himself settling down with you in a nice home far far away from Gotham. Maybe a kid or two, or maybe none, he doesn't really mind either way. It's everything he's ever wanted and yet he had convinced himself he would never have it. He's made himself a martyr. He can't come back from it. You had gotten to him too late. He feels tears stinging in his eyes as he comes. 
━━━━
He can sense a shift in the atmosphere at the office in the next couple of weeks. He had taken care of Gil Colson and the finale was right around the corner. He tried to be giddy about it. He was once so excited to show people the real Gotham and to wash this city away promptly after. But now he had his doubts. 
But there was no backing out for him. He would sacrifice himself just as he had planned. But he wanted to spend this last week with you. He needed it. He needed that last week of normalcy before he had to throw it all away. 
He doesn't understand why you look so frightened when he pulls you into the alleyway after work. He kisses you, because he needs to. He's tired of watching you and not getting to touch you. But you're pulling away quickly and he finds himself reaching out for you, craving more. He brushes your arm in an attempt to comfort you. "Are you okay?"
"I know, Edward."
He knows what you mean, but he feigns innocence. "What?" He watches as you take two steps back out of his reach. "You're killing people." He can only stare at you. What was he supposed to say? Should he just admit it all to you right then and there?
He thinks about what it might be like to kill you in that moment. To feel the warmth of your blood running down his arms and face. But it doesn't bring that same satisfaction that came with all of his other kills. In fact, it leaves a bitter taste in his mouth and makes his stomach turn. 
You meant too much. You weren't some corrupt snake parading as a saint. You were just a person trying their best to survive. He wants to leave kisses all over your soft face and apologize profusely at your feet for even allowing himself to think such a thought. In that moment he knows he will have to get you out before the flood. Otherwise, he will never be able to live with himself.
"I think you should go home and rest."
He leaves before you can react.
━━━━
He keeps good on his word. He will get you out of his hellhole before he destroys it. Before he wipes it clean. But first, you and him have unfinished business. 
He climbs through your window while you shower. And he doesn't feel bad this time. It's his last chance. The last time he will likely ever see you again. He stands and waits patiently for the water to stop and the patter of your bare feet on the cold floor.
When you finally appear, his heart is pounding in his chest. You're wearing just a nightgown, your hair soaked. You look like an angel, he thinks. He may be the devil in your eyes, but that's okay.
He sees how you freeze when you see him. Eyes wide. Shaking. "Edward."
He smiles as he steps toward you and cups one of your cheeks. You're warm and soft even through the glove on his hand. He wipes a tear from your face with this thumb.
"No more through the window. I'll be gone soon."
He removed the mask he came in. He doesn't need it to feel powerful around you. "I watched you live for a month. I watched you eat, sleep, undress, touch yourself. But you knew that right? Otherwise you wouldn't have put on such a show."
You squirm in his grasp but he holds you tight and continues. "But that's alright. I'll tell you the truth because I hate liars. I liked knowing that you were doing it all for me. I wanted nothing more than to cleanse Gotham, to give them true salvation, but you put a dent into that plan. You became a distraction that I foolishly indulged."
He feels on top of the world. He softens his grip and holds you by the small of your back before softly kissing you. He wants you to feel safe with him. The news, the media, the politicians they all saw him as a monster. The devil. But for you he would soften his gaze, loosen up his shoulders, and bubble wrap the metaphorical horns on his head to keep them from poking you. 
He leans back long enough to let you make your decision. He had bared his truth to you. He had expressed his want. If you wanted to leave you could. If you wanted him to stay he would. He would leave the ball in your court. But it only took a moment before your wide eyes closed and you surged forward to kiss him again. It's slightly violent the way your lips meet his and it's intoxicating to him. It floods a familiar heat into his belly. 
You're opening up so wide for him. For his tongue in your mouth and his fingers up your nightgown. It's easy for him to slip the fabric of your panties off your legs. He moves to his knees as he speaks.
"I wanted to do it right. Wanted to take you to that diner, buy your food, take you home, and act like I hadn't thought about fucking you into your mattress every single night."
He stares up at you for a moment and relishes in the little moan that slips past your lips at his words, before diving in. You taste so good. He wants to be on his knees worshipping you for the rest of his goddamn life. He can't help but smile when his tongue curls over that spot that makes your hips jerk forward. 
You're angelic.
"But it would be wrong to pretend to be someone I am not. I'm not a liar."
He lets two fingers prod at your entrance before sinking them in to his knuckles and curling up until you're yanking at his hair. "Eddie-" He's on his feet in an instant, swallowing up your moans in an open mouthed kiss, still working you open with his fingers. He can tell that you're right on the edge when he pulls his fingers from you, smiling at the whimpers you let out. He can't take it anymore, he needs to be inside you. So he pushes you to the bed and unbuckles his belt. 
It's quick and intense. The feeling of your walls fluttering around him is unlike any other feeling he's experienced. It's better than the pleasure he gets from watching the life drain from his prey. He can't help but whimper. 
You're gripping him so tight, if he weren't wearing the layer of green leather he's sure your nails would be biting into the skin of his back. He wants to bleed for you so badly. He meets your eyes, and he wants to pour everything he has into you. All of his love. But he spots the tears that are welling up in your eyes immediately and he falters a little. 
He wipes away your tears just as he had before.
"Does this not make you happy?"
He's startled when you cradle his face in your hands. "I am happy. But what comes after this? Am I supposed to ignore you and pretend I know nothing about you? That I feel nothing for you?" He stops moving altogether. His heart burns. He had been so caught up in finally having you this close that he had let himself forget the situation he was in.
"I have to mean nothing to you. Momentarily."
His eyes are burning. The longer he looks at you the more he wants to cry. So he kisses you instead with all the love he has to give behind it and continues his movements. 
He hears you start to speak, but cuts you off as his thrusts grow erratic and jerking. "I love you- please god- just say it back to me. Tell me you love me." And you force his eyes to meet yours by cradling his face again.
"Edward, I love you."
He falls apart, letting warm spurts of cum paint you from the inside out. He's never felt more alive as he buries his face into your neck and lets out soft whimpers and cries. He hopes you meant it. Though, he knows there's a chance you only said it to please him in the moment, he hopes and prays that you had secretly been holding back those words for weeks. He hopes you'll think of him often once he's gone. He rolls off of you and tucks himself back into his pants. 
"I'm gonna turn myself in in a couple of days."
"Okay."
"You should leave Gotham. It's not going to be safe for you here. If the cops ask, you're visiting a friend in Bludhaven."
He grabs your hand and meets your gaze.
"I promise if I ever get out, I'll find you."
━━━━
It breaks his heart to watch you sleep next to him. It reminds him of everything he missed out on. For so much of his life he had nothing. Nobody. And yet now, as you clutch onto his arm in your slumber, he feels a pang in his heart. As if you're his. It makes him want to call off everything, neutralize the bombs, move the vans, pick you up and take you far away. Far enough that nothing could ever hurt you or him ever again. 
But it's not realistic. He knows that you understand that by the way you had simply agreed with his plan to turn himself in. He selfishly hopes that you'd never be able to move on. That nobody would ever compare to him. He'd keep that thought in his head to cope with what's to come.
He slowly pushes himself off the bed and leans over your sleeping form. He presses a gentle kiss to your forehead, his way of saying "Goodbye. For now at least."
━━━━
The crack of the rifle has his ears ringing, but he doesn't care. He's put his body on autopilot. He's already down the fire escape and in the diner before the pigs can even comprehend what's happened. This was it. The beginning of the end. 
He remembers your words.
He orders a slice of pumpkin pie and stirs his coffee while he waits for the inevitable. 
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Really proud of the inks for my WIP, think I'll be posting inks separately if they're good enough to stand on their own
(Edit: finished version here)
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arctorres · 8 months ago
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WIP
love some good scriddler angst hehehe
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andy4yippee · 4 months ago
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Dark riddlebat fanfic the poll was about, thisll be a series that i hope ill finish :) not beta read..
Tastes like silver . (pt. 1)
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BRUCE WAYNE X EDWARD NASHTON
CONTENT WARNINGS : illegal substance abuse, mentions of toxic relationships that are brief. Hallucinations and a PTSD mention.
Taglist For DC content (comment if youd like to be added.) : @cutesludge
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The clock struck one.
Batman-- Bruce, sat at a circular table. along with superman, aquaman..you get the spiel. meeting.
staring.
staring at nobody, at a wall.
Bruce pushes his tounge between his two front teeth, his thumb tense rather than resting in the webspace between his index and thumb calmy.
Nashton. Edward.
Cocky bastard.
He'd always say things, have the last word. it was bothering. very. Bruce hated it, he hated him. He was quite the stuck up. He knew he would do it just to get on his ass, to annoy him. And,
he considered giving him away to the police.
multiple times. but, that wasnt a option.
Edward had been..meeting up with him. Nothing weird!
And, bruce.. He couldn't sleep. He didn't really have a reason, per say, but, Bruce couldn't fall asleep. physically, could not.
he usually had power naps. he did have power naps. 20, 30 minutes twice a day.
It wouldnt work anymore. he could not go to sleep. he was tired -- miserable.
So, he did the only normal thing.
Pay for drugs.
Yes, Batman. Bruce Wayne. Snorting Xanax. On a good day, just enough weed to knock him out. what a sight!!
And, bought from the Riddler, too.
It worked. Put him right to sleep, or..whatever you call that. he would either do it in his car, or in his bedroom. and god did he sleep! but woke up after,
sick,
sweating,
and,
gross.
Every time, Bruce said--
"This is my last one." as he unwrapped the pill from a tissue, shakingly placed it on his dashboard, crushed it with anything he could find,
snorted it,
and passed out in his car for hours.
But every time, he went back. the addiction- it was horrible, he wished he never got into it. He wished he put Riddler in jail when he found him.
But, they were both stuck. Bruce couldn't tell the police about Edward, Because, they'd find out he was doing drugs.
that would be quite the news headline. Bruce chuckled.
and, Edward couldn't tell the police, nevermind go near one.
But- taking the drug, it was noticeable.
Bruce wasn't as sharp. he wasn't as polite. Clark, one of his closest friends, saw obviously that he wasn't ok.
Alfred saw that he wasn't ok.
Selina saw.
Gordon saw.
Dick saw.
Everybody saw.
And he'd try to fake it, tried to pretend he wasn't drowsy.
pretend that his mouth wasn't always dry, pretend that he didn't have a horrible memory, pretend that he didn't have hammering headaches.
But god, was it hard. Bruce wasn’t sure how much longer he could take of it, honestly. And quite frankly, people were starting to notice so much they asked him about it.
“Bruce.”
“Bruce?”
He snapped out of his trance of staring at a particular, non busy spot on the floor.
“Yeah? Whats up?”
Clark stares back at him, frowning, breathing out before he talks. Hesitating.
“Whats, uh..whats wrong with you, bud?” He asked, hand holding up his head.
Bruce chuckled, looking around and acting surprised.
“You’re asking me that? Uh, whats up with..that girl? Right?” He pointed at a random woman on the street.
“She seems down.” He said, before realizing the pun he accidentally incorporated, laughing harder.
“Quite down..” clark mumbles, staring out the window, before getting back on track.
“Ok, seriously, talk to me.”
Bruce coughs.
“About what? The weather?? Y’know, it is quite nice out today, might have a cookout! So, how are—“
“Bruce.”
A hand grabs his wrist.
“Clark.” He clears his throat.
“We should talk.”
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The clock strikes three.
“Bruce, what is wrong!?” Clark says, voice raising in volume.
It was just them in the meeting room, just them in the building. Clarks voice bounced off the walls of the room and leaked behind the doors, into the stairways.
“I dont know.” He mumbles aggressively. Clark had been trying to get him to talk, and ‘i dont know’ was the best, honest response yet.
“Bruce, you- you can talk to me! You haven’t even talked to Alfred about whatever’s going on.”
“You’ve talked to Alfred? About- about me?”
“That doesn’t matter.” Clark scoffs, bouncing off from leaning on the table.
“Bruce, somethings up, and i mean..i care for you, ok? Whats happening? I wont tell anybody.”
Bruce clears his throat.
“I just feel lost, i guess.”
“Why?”
“I feel like I’ve lost my life. Its seriously out of my grasp and control, and i always feel in control, so its stressing.”
“That makes sense, i get it.”
Bruce chuckled. He didnt get it. He usually felt insane pride, like he was better than everyone. But he lost that, he lost his sins.
His sins made him feel human.
Now, he felt more stupid than he ever could, as unimportant as you could be.
“Yeah..uhm, hey, hows the villain fighting? Riddlers still out there, right?”
Bruce paused.
“Yep. I hope we’ll find him soon.” Bruce looks at the window.
“Look at me.”
— what?
Bruce shivered.
“Look at me, bruce.”
Bruce looked at Clark, eyes wide,
“Yes?”
“Youre no good of a liar.”
“What?”
“Youre no good of a liar. Spend your lies on someone else.”
Bruces eyes filled with tears, his mouth quivering.
“Im not lying to you, clark?”
— bruce?
“Hey, look at me.”
“What?”
“Are you ok? Whats going on?” Clark was now closer to him, his hand rubbing bruces arm.
Bruce looked at clark, the shivers disappeared.
“Sorry. Uhm, must be some kinda flashback thing.” Bruce shrug.
“PTSD? You..i mean, yeah. Kinda looked like it. But dont they last longer?”
“I dunno. Uhm, hey..Y’know what? This helped. Im gonna catch the road, before the weather gets shitty.”
“Really? Uh, bruce-“
“Seeya.” Bruce smiles, waving as he walked down the stairway, getting out of the room quickly, leaving clark worried.
As bruce arrived home, The rain pelted down relentlessly on the streets of Gotham.
His shoulders slumped, opening the mansion door.
He dropped his things inside, didn’t bother to look in a mirror, and briefly said hi to alfred before opening the door again,
Going back to that car,
Parking it in a alleyway.
Again, and again.
But even in his sleep, he felt alone, and he felt like no one cared.
That plunge into darkness, it didn’t help him. And, he wasn’t so sure why he kept going back.
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finzphoenix · 8 months ago
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A mind of madness, consumed by fright, The body still alive, the soul left that night. The one that once was, can’t be anymore, Only sorrow now, and emptiness galore....
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batmanie · 9 months ago
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Rip apart/Sew anew - Scriddler
The Riddler was weeping, sitting in a darkest corner of his spacious hideout, his back pressed against the cold, basement wall. Scarecrow stood over him, avoiding any sudden movements, simply observing this sad picture of a complete mental deterioration.
Almost every inch of empty surface inside the abandoned orphanage was painted green with riddles, equations, and question marks – the writing was on the wall, in a very literal sense.
“I can’t…” Edward muttered to himself, his voice hushed, his hands covering his head in a protective gesture. “...can’t do it… It won’t work… Why doesn’t it work? Why?”
Scarecrow could see that his right hand was injured, blood from a shallow cut on a side of his palm was oozing into Edward’s messy hair, staining his forehead, and dripping down his face.
Riddler didn’t seem to notice that at all, he just sat there with his knees close to his chest, as if he wanted to make himself look smaller, to shrink, and to disappear from existence.
“Why? Why? WHY?” Edward wailed, tears streaming down his hollow cheeks. “I tried, and they still don’t act the way I programmed them to. I can’t get it right! I don’t know how... I’m a failure! A cheater! Stupid, stupid, stupid…”
Read the full chapter here -> https://archiveofourown.org/works/19347592/chapters/135425050
Warning for a triggering content: psychological torture, abuse, violence, mentioned suicide attempt, and child abuse.
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