#rewatch: the sins of the father

[cynthia39100]

Merlin rewatch -- S2E8: The Sins of the Father

I like how much it was shown in this episode the way Merlin cared about Arthur as a person. He wanted to keep him safe and happy. Whether he chose the right method is another question. It also showed how much Arthur trusted Merlin with his true face and his vulnerability.

After accepting Morgause's challenge, Arthur was very insistent and confident in front of his father, but here in his own room, with Merlin cleaning his armour, he allowed himself to show uncertainty, if not in words but in his demeanour.

I love these little glances of how they spent everyday life together. Merlin stayed at night, doing his chores and chatting with Arthur about the day's event.

I liked that Merlin mentioned maybe Arthur would hesitate facing a woman, not teasing but out of worry. He also wanted to spare Arthur of his guilt so he didn’t object to persuading Morgause to withdraw. He didn't forget to reassure Arthur either when the combat was inevitable.

This scene was so cute. Merlin was all serious before the fight, but once Arthur was safe and had the energy to complain, it was fine again for Merlin to tease him. Arthur could only whine like a child and make excuses in front of Merlin because Merlin would tease him. He wouldn't take Arthur's excuses, but he also wouldn't look down on him because of the childish behaviour. In front of Morgause, he congratulated her for the victory; in front of Uther, he accepted his defeat even when Uther blamed it on Morgause's magic. With Merlin, he said that it was because Morgause was a woman, or later Morgause used magic, and let Merlin disagree with him.

Why was Arthur picking the wall with his dagger like a naughty boy was shot so beautifully in the sunlight?? So melancholy. Gorgeous.

It's always "we" <3 I like that while Merlin and Uther had the same opinion about Morgause's motivation, what Uther did was to lock Arthur in, and Merlin was to get Arthur out. It's not like Merlin was convinced. In fact, he argued about it all the way until Arthur brought out his mother. But he would always follow Arthur's lead.

I love that after all the ranting on the road, Merlin didn’t say anything, anything at all, when Arthur finally admitted the real reason he was so insistent on the trip -- to learn about his mother. Beautiful understanding.

Then came the lovely campfire scene. It might be the first time Merlin willingly shared a piece of himself. In too many similar scenes it was Arthur sharing his thoughts or emotions while Merlin reassure him, making this scene extra special. I think Arthur looked a bit surprised too. I also love how quick Merlin replied ���No.” when Arthur asked if was wrong to seek a glimpse of his mother at all costs. This beautiful understanding made the fact that Merlin chose to deny the truthfulness of Ygraine's spirit in the end all the more tragic.

I wonder what Merlin thought about the fact that Arthur was born of magic. About Uther’s hypocrisy. There was one instance where he seemed to be angry about that. But mostly he was just sad for Arthur.

The fact that Arthur allowed Merlin to witness this was another proof of his immense trust in Merlin. He was so exposed and vulnerable, a little kid begging for his mother's forgiveness. And he trusted that Merlin wouldn't use it against him.

After all those beautiful mutual understanding and heart-to-heart, it ended with a lie and a broken smile. Merlin really sounded so cheerful if you didn't look at his face. The contrast was heartbreaking. Merlin wanted to protect Arthur's heart so much that he made an unforgivable lie. Arthur trusted Merlin so much that he accepted it. Their dynamic was so tragic and beautiful I will never get over it.

[S2E8] [other episodes]

[bloodfreak-boyking]

He means well, but…

You mean, he thinks you’re gonna get laid.

[spn-rewatch-ventzone]

More shame on 10x09 for trying to convince me that John was a good father that “raised Dean right” because just THREE episodes later, in 10x12, Dean is bonding with a woman in a bar by talking about how he had to get creative with the way he cooked Mac n cheese because he would be stuck cooking it for him and Sam so often

And like to really drill the point home, his creative liberties to improve the Mac and cheese were ketchup and tuna.

Dabb is gonna catch hands from me for writing/approving the “He raised me right” line

[spockvarietyhour]

The return of the stand-up jefferies tube!

Star Trek V and TNG had stand up access corridors/jefferies tubes before the crawlways were introduced:

Also that TNG set was reused a few episodes later in "Sins of the Father"

and in the season 4 episode "Future Imperfect", this time as a (fake) Romulan base.

[new-seas]

Merlin is literally too kind for his own good. More proof the show is about human love and not living out some pie in the sky destiny

[normcore-tertiary-character]

Hey I think they're in Mexico

[jane-newby]

Why I love Caitlyn Kiramman (S1 & 2)

Decided to write this just because... and well I've seen a few "why I hate Arcane Cait" so I am writing why I think she's awesome.

1. I am a sucker for misfit characters. When Cait meets Jayce in the rain and solidifies their relationship by admitting she's a misfit too, my heart was sold. Of course, many of the Arcane characters are misfits, but Cait because of her birth into high society runs against many of the expectations and beliefs of her station. She gives off Sherlock vibes when it comes to social interactions and her skill of deductions/sleuthing.

2. She's an excellent shot. There is something about a girl with a great aim that I love (Hunger Games Katniss is the first that comes to mind). My favorite shooting scenes are from S2 in the Jinx/Sevika skirmish and the final battle when she takes on a sniper role.

3. Noxian training montage. After being kidnapped, knocked out and almost choked out, it was about time Cait learned hand to hand to combat. While I would have loved a longer scene it was nice to see 60 seconds of her Mulan-esque training session.

4. Badass Disney princess/prince vibes. She had a heart of gold and was in the pursuit of justice and truth ever since her Season 1 convo with Grayson ("What are you shooting for young Kiramman?") Cait spends most of Season 1 defending or attempting to save others (i.e. Jayce, Vi, the people of Zaun). She is willing to listen when she is in the wrong (aka conversation with Ekko and the Firelights) or understand the experiences of those she knows little about.

5. Cait and Vi’s Slow Burn Romance. “Will they won’t they.” A Romeo & Juliet aka other side of the tracks romance. Opposites Attract. Again I am a complete sucker for this romance trope. Step Up. Mulan. The 100. She-Ra. Miles Morales and Gwen (Please never compare Jinx and Ekko just because the ethnics match. They are not the same.) You give me two unlikely characters who go through the ups and downs of life and then finally consummate that relationship. I am down HARD. I like the tension. The tennis match of love and hate until they finally figure out they are meant for each other. Cait and Vi could have made love in a tree and I still would have happily rewatched because their love was multiple little scenes of looks, nicknames, rescues, fights, a kiss, and “I am down bad,” shower scene. What’s not to like?

6. Cait’s Character Development. From the fires of tragedy, a naive, eager, idealistic, bright eyed Young Kiramman princess develops into an older, wiser, humble leader. 

To me, her arc is about the passage into adulthood. An examination of that age old question “What does it mean to be human?” As the years pass, Cait clung to Grayson’s words–essentially her why, her purpose. But what happens when that purpose is challenged or marred by reality, by pain, anger? 

Cait’s purpose is immediately challenged when she finds out the Enforcer sheriff is corrupt and almost kills her in order to hide his sins. While it’s clear, there is no love between the two, Marcus’s corruption and her confrontation with Ekko challenge her belief in a system she joined in her pursuit of justice. Immediately, after, she attempts to broker an agreement that will help Zaunites but the Council selfishly rejects her proposal. You know the rest of the story.

Hours later she is kidnapped, tortured by the sister of her crush. Then the same sister drops a bomb killing not only people she knew, but her mom. Then at the memorial, another attack occurs presumably from the same sister–Jinx. The Council is eager to annihilate Zaun, but Cait attempts to be a voice of reason while grieving. Then when she has a chance to kill Jinx she fails and pushes/hits her girlfriend away. She loses her brother, and the only council member who notices she’s struggling. Her father is MIA. A known genocidal general begins to manipulate her. 

In a matter of months, Cait’s purpose is crushed by tragedy and a need for revenge. In season 1, Silco states, “There’s a monster inside all of us.” Cait’s monster rears its ugly head as she dawns the evil cloak, broods in dark rooms (thank you ep 4 beginning montage) and embraces oppressive tactics to fulfill her new objective. Cait’s conflict is not just an external manifestation but an internal one. Will she let bitterness take over or will she stick to her values of justice, truth, and kindness? We know that she has not fully embraced Ambessa’s ideologies, as she is constantly questioning Ambessa directives. Her conversations with Singed and her decision to spy on Singed’s actions also show that internal war. Ultimately, it is the decision to help Vi and betray Ambessa that led back to Cait’s core. She didn’t need to make a Youtube apology video. She chose through her actions to get back to a new, healed version of her purpose. Her last words in S2  “Are you still in this fight?” are a reflection of Cait’s own journey–to rise from tragedy and her own mistakes to make a difference even when pain, challenges, evil can make the journey seem impossible. 

Cait said it best in Season 2’s final memorial, Our only consolation for every loss we found some good, some light, worth gaining, worth fighting for. And though we are doomed to revisit the error of our ways, spark ever more conflicts, our story isn’t over.

And this is why I love Cait because of what she represents. A strong female character with quirks. A sense of justice. Love. A closet full of demons. Transformation. Humanity. And Badass shooting skills.

[depressocafe]

I'm rewatching one of my favorite anime FMA: Brotherhood, and I just realized how religious it is.

Like it's always been religious but in doing research on the rapture I found out that the four horseman of the apocalypse show up in show:

----

War: the major uprisings around amestris such as the Ishvalan war of extermination

Pestilence: shortly after the ishavalen war a plague ravaged the country side, taking Ed and Al's mother with it

Famine: throughout the show we see increased levels of poverty, individuals living in slums and alleyways, factories going out of business and food carefully being rationed and distributed.

Death: this is self-explainatory.

----

On top of that we have Van Hohenheim, Edward, and Alphonse who represent the holy trinity

Father who represents Lucifer and the seven deadly sins which biblically are devils/demons working under lucifer's orders

And Roy Mustang, who despite lacking many of the physical qualities, represents Lady justice. As he loses his sight by the end of the show and and is similar In moral intelligence to lady justice herself.

The entirety of Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood is just the Rapture and the events leading up to it. I'm astounded that this anime has been out since the early 2000s and I'm still finding new symbolisms, details, and information within its contents. That's why it's one of my favorite anime, so much care and intelligence put into one show.🔥♥️✨️💯👑

[plutoccult]

POST-WAR!REINER BECOMES A DAD

pairing: reiner braun x female reader

description: super cute headcanons depicting reiner becoming a father for the first time.

author’s note: new theme!! slayyyy 🤭 i wrote these after i rewatched how i met your mother for the fifty billionth time and the scene where barney meets his child for the first time spawned these headcanons. y’all liked dad!jean, so here’s dad!reiner 🤪 it ain’t much, but it’s honest work. i’d love to write more dad content for the aot men in the future, but i hope you enjoy this!

tags: @solefleurs @heavenfilm @cowgirlikets @jeanboyjean @femme-lune @todorokiskitten @0p1umz

taglist form here

— it was no question that reiner always felt like he didn’t deserve to live a happy life.

— but despite all of his sins and feeling like a monster, you were the one to see a loving man underneath, and loved him despite it all.

— once reiner settled into life after years of war and peace negotiations that followed, he was finally able to live the life he always craved, yet didn’t think he deserved.

— the two of you got a little house with hopes of starting a family one day. it was a bit of a fixer upper, but reiner became quite the handyman to create the perfect family home.

— reiner always feared starting a family would mean he’d accidentally create a child just as screwed up as him, but you always soothed those fears, insisting your future child will be brought up with nothing but love, what reiner always wanted in his own childhood.

— of course, there was still some worry, but that was normal for anyone becoming a parent for the first time. reiner just had to remind himself that there wouldn’t be any vicious cycles repeating.

— when you finally became pregnant after months of trying, reiner was ecstatic.

— he wanted to do everything he could to make sure you were both ready. he built the baby’s crib from scratch, using the chopped wood he brought home everyday to craft it himself.

— reiner even tended to your every need, although sometimes you tried to insist he didn’t, reiner didn’t want you have to lift a finger. you were creating new life, after all.

— once it came time for the birth, pre-parental kicked in terribly. every doubt came rushing back so quickly, but reiner had to keep it together for your sake. he couldn’t let you deal with a wreck like him while you were trying to push out a kid.

— but after hours and hours, a baby girl was finally born, and she was one of the greatest things to ever grace this earth.

— when reiner met his baby girl for the very first time, it was like he fell in love all over again. his love for you was always strong, but his love for your child carried just as much strength. every worry he had washed away the second he saw your precious child.

— he held the newborn in his arms, his first words to her; “you are the love of my life… everything i have and everything i am is yours… forever.”

— it was no contest that reiner would dedicate every damn day of his life to you, your child, and whatever future children you may have. there would never be a single doubt.

© plutoccult / 310802. please do not copy, repost, modify, or translate any of my content in or outside of tumblr. reblogs are appreciated <3

[eddiediaaz]

MERLIN REWATCH | 10th finale anniversary ↳ 2.08 - the sins of the father

[trenchcoatimpala]

I just rewatched "In my time of dying" and I have some things I need to say about that speech John gives Dean before he goes off to die. Let's touch on the points, shall we?

John apologizes to Dean for making him grow up too fast, putting too much on his shoulders, having Dean be the one to comfort him when it should've been the other way around, and he tells him he's proud of him.

The fact that Dean has to ask if it's really John talking is the first clue at how messed up this is. But what I want to talk about is that you'd think this little speech is kinda nice actually. You’d think wow, look at John acknowledging everything he made Dean do/go through. You’d think hey at least he said he’s proud of Dean for real this time! You’d think that, right? And yeah it is nice. John does mean what he’s saying.

But it all gets ruined by what John does after he gives his little "I'm sorry I screwed up so much" speech. Because he then tells Dean that he may have to KILL Sam. That whole entire speech just gets fucking NEGATED by that in my opinion, because what did he just tell Dean he was sorry for? Oh, that's right, putting too much on Dean's shoulders, making him look out for Sam when that was supposed to be his (a father's) job.

He tells Dean to "watch out for Sammy" and of course Dean says "yeah, Dad, you know I will" but it's a double entandre. Watch out for Sam as in: he’s your kid brother, keep him safe, but also as in: he’s dangerous. It’s giving Dean more responsibility that he SHOULDN’T HAVE. After literally having just told Dean that he's sorry for dumping all that crap on him, he goes and dumps more crap on him. It was a deathbed confession of his sins, maybe even hoping that telling Dean he was sorry might absolve him of terrible torture in Hell. If he wasn't about to die, he wouldn't have told Dean any of that. Not to mention the fact that he's also leaving Dean in charge of finishing the hunt for yellow eyes.

And of course, after John dies, Dean's left with so much suvivors guilt, and he's confused and scared about what his Dad meant when he said he may have to kill Sam. This in turn leads to Dean sacrificing himself for Sam because "I'm not even supposed to be here" so in his mind it's evening the scales.

Dean carries so much with him and it all comes back to John fucking Winchester and his A+ parenting.

[cynthia39100]

Merlin rewatch -- S2E8: The Sins of the Father

This episode is the starting point to darkness I feel. The first time Merlin lied to Arthur about something so close to Arthur's heart, the first time he put Arthur's sanity above his/magic's future, and the first time he decided for Arthur what he should know and do.

I did feel for Merlin. It was a difficult situation, he really didn't have the time and headspace to think properly. Denying the truthfulness of Ygraine's ghost was the quickest and the most effective way to get Arthur to back down, and he was killing himself speaking those lines. Arthur was saying everything Merlin wanted to hear, having all the right conclusions about magic and Uther, and Merlin was about to ruin it.

I still hope Merlin could try to reason with Arthur more. Merlin was so crossed when he found that Gaius kept this secret, now he was doing it to Arthur. He could have said that the kingdom would be destroyed if Arthur killed Uther without claiming everything Ygraine said was Morgause’s lie! Now that child would continue thinking he caused his mother’s death. And nearly his father's too. It might be better than patricide, at the moment, but if he eventually accepts magic and learns the truth, how many more people will Uther have killed? How will Arthur think of it?

It's really frustrating because it's the closest Arthur would get to the truth about his father's crime. In the end, not only was his opinion of magic reset, but he also had more personal reasons to resent magic.

[S2E8] [other episodes]

[ughdoir]

꣑ৎ shawn michaels! birthday sex in a hotel what more could you ask for.

contains black female reader, lowercase intended, insertion, dirty talk, birthday sex, make up sex, rough at times, aftercare, unprotected sex (no glove no love), squirting, creaming, orgasm. minors don’t interact

shawn’s adamant about not wanting anything for his birthday the older man not fond of aging as his position in the wwf was unknown. with new talent emerging and titles changing hands the thought of being replaced was daunting.

he settled into the hotel room alone without the presence of his girlfriend. hot water from the shower cleansing him of the sins he partook in with hunter earlier. the men sharing everything together and coincidentally a birthday five days apart.

getting caught up in the limelight that provided much more than this evenings house show. alcohol would’ve been his speciality but tonight was different opting to be sober as his mind couldn’t stop racing.

the girlfriend in question hasn’t responded to him all day a bit annoyed of the decision to spend a birthday in sin city knowing that women were practically hanging their panties from the turn buckles for the degenerates.

shawn understood why he was in the dog house so he didn’t bother to call again. a year of dating that wasn’t short of heated arguments and headaches. so instead he’s sipping from a wine glass rewatching the god father with a box of cheese pizza positioned on the counter.

midnight approaching as a soft knock on the door breaks his focus thinking it was the movie before he hears another thud his eyebrows raise in confusion. from the peephole he recognizes you cautiously opening the door.

a genuine smile gracing his features as you’re holding a chocolate cake decorated with chocolate frosting a tub of his favorite french vanilla ice cream at your feet.

his eyes scan your appearance high waisted denim jeans with a white crop top. silver hoops matching a butterfly necklace the hint of makeup subtle with nude glossy lips.

your hair shoulder length and slightly curled at the end small flower clips securing it from falling into your face.

“happy birthday baby.” your voice soft the smile unmistaken as your boyfriend takes the cake from you fingers joining together in the process.

he’s ushering you inside eyes inadvertently lingering on the curve of your ass. grabbing a fork to dig into the chocolate he’s chewing slowly ensuring to place the ice cream in the freezer.

you note the tidiness of the hotel room a stark contrast to his on screen personality. “a year of dating and i never would’ve took you for a baker.” he’s forking another piece the chocolate melting in his mouth with a hum. light blue eyes warm with affectionate at your gesture.

“you’ve never asked.” your response a little snarky settling on the couch as shawn is all to familiar with your attitude.

over the next few hours you’ve decided to forgive shawn considering the stress at work and fact that he hasn’t stepped out of the relationship.

you both became immersed in a conversation of wrestling asking the superstar himself about his everyday experience within the wwf. you met outside of the company wrestling not being your favorite pastime but you were smitten the day you saw him.

one conversation leading to more, not bothered by your younger age of twenty three as you kept his head on straight. the man patient allowing you to question everything, being open with his responses and pleased with how much you’ve learned about his craft. feeling as if another year around the sun with you was worth it.

he’s comfortable reclining further as a scent of tangerines and vanilla entices him to pull you closer placing one arm behind your head. small kisses placed to your temple as the atmosphere shifts shawn knowing how to make a particular pulse grow between your legs.

“never knew a younger women could be so sophisticated.” his breath is fanning your face. you’re so timid it makes him want to claim you. cute not enough to summarize how adorable you are.

“then maybe you don’t know a lot about younger women.” the rebuttal slipping out casually as shawn smirks his eyes turning a shade darker.

“is that so? perhaps you can enlighten me.” your breath hitches as he kisses you, the older man taking the lead as his tongue wrestles yours. a connecting trail of spit as you separate leaving you sticky.

“i never said you were forgiven.” the man shakes his head laughing with a tsk his hand coming to guide you towards the bed. round ass sinking into the plush as he stands in front of you staring down at your frame.

“arms up.” he’s stern you obeying as he’s discarding your shirt across the room tits on display as he toys with your nipples pulling slightly. mouth then coming to latch on the sensitive bud sucking harshly as his fingers find your pussy.

your thong adding for separation as he taps your clit embarrassed with how turned on you are. “i’m sorry babe.” you can barely focus on his apologies as he’s rubbing your clit jeans and underwear feeling a bit tighter as he’s purposely teasing you.

shawn somehow always having to be in control and on his birthday was no exception. he’s pulling away turning you around and propping your ass up on the edge of the bed. peeling your jeans and thong down to your ankles.

he locks eyes on your glistening folds tongue lapping at your clit as he eats you from behind arms holding you in place as he slurps. you’re squirming around eyes rolling back as he’s hungry for you tongue going as deep as it could.

“fuck, no running princess.” shawn’s vocal his own pretty moans slipping out as he’s flicking your clit the cream coating his mouth as he pushes his face deeper the sweetness simply delicious.

“shawn” is all you can moan pleading as you can feel your abdomen clenching helplessly grinding on his face. his blond hair in disarray as he’s humming the sensations have you shaking reduced to a cumming mess.

“fucking brat.” the words make you whimper as he’s lining his dick up with your entrance tip slick as he’s collecting the juices a chuckle erupting from him.

“think you can take it?” he taunts not waiting for protest while pushing his dick inside of you with a groan. the warmth and tightness inviting as you hissed still not fully able to adjust to his well endowed length.

your head is pushed into the mattress back arching deeper as your cunt made several sounds his dick throbbing inside of you and hitting a spot that makes you babble.

his actions rough with a hint of being gentle ensuring to place kisses on your back everytime he swatted your ass.

you’re drunk from his dick mouth agape as your drooling gripping the bed sheets while small tears of pleasure form being so full is heavenly indeed. “my precious girl you’re getting so good at this.” shawn is praising you the way you’re taking him so well driving him crazy.

liquid spilling from your pussy as your squirting the juices staining the sheets underneath you both whimpering as you’ve never came so hard before. feeling him deep in your stomach as shawn’s eager hips slamming as the birthday boy chased his own high.

his cock stiffens pulling out of you as ropes of cum lands on your thong and jeans, some dripping on your brown skin literally marking his territory. he’s still hard though eyes still feasting on your body as round two looms in the air.

“i’m not done with you yet it’s still my birthday.” the statement has you on your back legs spread open as he’s smiling ready to destroy you.

[melonteee]

Rewatching Marineford, I realized that Garp's protection (and his love) are so conditional and it really sucks.

Garp had every opportunity twice over to stand up for Ace and Luffy but he never does. He never even questions why a son has to attone for the sins of his father. He can act proud and "that's my grandson!" but never actually does anything for them.

He has known these kids since they were born. Yet it was so hard for him to justify fighting for his family.

I guess it isn't that much of a surprise since he just handed the kids off to Dadan. Her acting as a foil to Garp is pretty interesting though.

In contrast, when Coby gets kidnapped, a kid who Garp didn't know for even half the amount of time as Ace+Luffy. Yet he risked it all for Coby. I won't lie Dadan had every right to beat the shit out of Garp.

Anyway thank you for reading my hate talk. I actually love garp but as a character he frustrates me sometimes LOL

I hate that we literally got a scene of Dadan punching the shit out of Garp, of Dadan saying TO OUR FACES that Garp was CRUEL for what he did and that he did NOTHING! Dadan even YELLING at Makino "I DON'T CARE ABOUT GARP, THINK ABOUT HOW LUFFY FEELS!"

How the fuck is that not Oda saying TO OUR FACES that Garp fucked up. That Garp is so neck deep in his marine ways he couldn't even TRY to protect the kid he PROMISED to protect OUTSIDE of the conditions he set for himself?

Yes, MAYBE if Ace were a marine, Garp would've done something, but why in the world does that matter? Is promised protection of someone still protection ONLY if they do EXACTLY what you say? Is it still protection if you try and force them into a box where you BELIEVE it's the only place you can protect them? I always hear that Garp trying to make Ace a marine is Garp's way of supporting Ace, but support isn't support if it's CONDITIONAL! Support means you support your loved ones in what they do, even if you DON'T particularly agree. Garp was not supporting Ace, he was trying to shove him into a corner because Garp didn't want to go outside of his Marine values for Ace.

Luffy risked his life for Ace, and yet Garp chose his JOB over his family. I don't understand why that point is so hard for people to understand when we watched it happen in real time. Dadan's reaction is there so WE can go "Wait, yeah, actually. Garp was kind of a fucking coward for that!" And the fact Garp allowed Dadan to beat him means he feels guilt and regret for what he did, and he should!

I love Garp's character but sometimes talking about him makes me wanna tear my hair out LMAO

[poisonedfate]

bbc merlin- 02x08 The Sins of the Father

merlin rewatch - 02x08

(with rei and gray)

[likeafantasy]

DEXTER REWATCH (ɴᴇᴡ ʙʟᴏᴏᴅ) — 1.10 SINS OF THE FATHER This is not an easy decision. Sometimes I wish the hurricane had taken me, released me from the burden of my own urges. Instead, it showed me that I have to bear them alone. That's my fate. So, unless Harrison starts showing any dark tendencies, I beg you let me die so my son can live.