#THEIR TERRIBLE CHILDHOOD IS FUNDAMENTAL TO THEIR CHARACTERS
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this is really rambly but whatever im just talking
harrenhal bath scene for e.g. it's a confessional and a baptism. jaime reveals his deepest secret to brienne, she sits quietly and listens. it's a kind of cleansing: she knows everything else, but she doesn't know this. he's entirely bare before her, both figuratively and literally, and at the end he's effectively reborn in Brienne's arms, internally insisting upon his true name. it's more like a return to and a reclamation of that name, after having been known so long as 'kingslayer'.
and it goes w/o saying that GRRM is expressing here a pretty catholic sentiment - one achieved through confession and atonement:
[On Jaime] I want there to be a possibility of redemption for us, because we all do terrible things. We should be able to be forgiven. Because if there is no possibility of redemption, what’s the answer then? X
and like GRRM isn't exactly shy about highlighting the contradictions and hypocrisies of the FO7, knighthood and the KG - which ftr are tied up in each other. knighthood is sworn to the Seven, as a part of Andal culture that was carried over with the invasion, and KG sprouts from the ideals of knighthood, even whilst corrupting them further.
and I think the point in Jaime and Brienne's story is that the core tenets of knighthood do mean something, just as even a lapsed Catholic might appreciate the core tenets of loving one's neighbour etc, if not the religious practise. to be caught up in the terms and conditions is to lose yourself in what it's all meant to mean. Brienne once judged Jaime harshly according to the rules, but found greater understanding of him, herself, and the world around them by opening her mind to the nuance, and trusting in her own understanding. it's not that knighthood is a fundamentally corrupt concept, but that true knighthood is about understanding it as a broader worldview of care for those weaker than yourself, rather than a set of rules, or a status symbol.
i think FO7 (particularly following HOTD lol) often gets slated as the worst faith bc it so resembles western christianity and all its associations, and the zealots (and what they do to characters like Cersei, Lancel etc) represent the very worst of that faith. the other faiths have something more mystical and formless about them: the weirwoods are tied up with the magical core of westeros, r'hollorism is clearly fucking onto something etc. and they're more appealing in that sense.
but I don't think the FO7 is portrayed entirely negatively! the way our FO7 characters follow and ponder the Seven as they relate to themselves is a really interesting device for introspection. Jaime for example has always seen himself strictly as the Warrior - he doesn't care all that much for the FO7 more broadly, but this is the prism he's understood himself through since childhood - he's the perfect archetype. likewise, it's the prism through which he once understood Cersei (i.e. as the Maiden), yet this led instead to a reduced understanding of Cersei as an individual. Brienne meanwhile feels apart from both the Maiden and the Warrior - she fits neither. both in a sense reduce themselves in how they do or do not relate to the Seven.
but without getting into JB and gender again (cos I will), their stories are more a contemplation on the fluidity of the Seven. it's said repeatedly in the story that the Seven are one, and so it then seems quite contradictory that characters should asign themselves to one and not the others. neither Jaime nor Brienne are simply the Warrior or the Maiden, they can be both each to the other: there's a kind of synchronicity in this, in that neither is solely the protector, neither is solely the protected. through the true ideals knighthood, they are both to each other. what seems rigid as a concept is actually one that can be interpreted more freely, and reveal new facets of the self rather than shut them down.
anyway so as i say this is rambly but i guess my broader point is that JB are sort of an exploration of how faith does not have to be about shutting down parts of ourselves, limiting our worldview, and striving to live untainted, but forgiving and finding ourselves and each other. it feels familiar to me as a lapsed catholic MYSELF: a deep scepticism and discomfort with the rigid dichotomies that send you fleeing from it in the first place, but a sort of new inquisitiveness and warmth one feels when considering its core tenets on one's own terms.
who fucking knows what exactly GRRM's relationship with catholicism is (idk even what mine is), but I think through jaime and brienne you maybe get to see some of the better things he took from it, i.e. forgiveness, introspection, generosity of spirit etc. like if you do away with all the corruption and misinterpretation and you sit with just the core, I guess you are left with what Brienne strives for in AFFC. she is not fighting for any individual or institution, but purely what she has taken away from knighthood, and what she believes to be right and good. and Jaime, once disillusioned by the rigidity of it all, is inspired by precisely that
have we ever talked about the weird catholic undertones in jaime and brienne's storyline. like grrm idk if you even know you did this but from one roman catholic girly to another it is loud
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More shame on 10x09 for trying to convince me that John was a good father that “raised Dean right” because just THREE episodes later, in 10x12, Dean is bonding with a woman in a bar by talking about how he had to get creative with the way he cooked Mac n cheese because he would be stuck cooking it for him and Sam so often
And like to really drill the point home, his creative liberties to improve the Mac and cheese were ketchup and tuna.
Dabb is gonna catch hands from me for writing/approving the “He raised me right” line
#spn#supernatural#spn rewatch#turnip talks#dean winchester#sam winchester#spn season 10#spn 10x09#the things we left behind#spn 10x12#about a boy#john winchester#andrew dabb#spn critical#THEIR TERRIBLE CHILDHOOD IS FUNDAMENTAL TO THEIR CHARACTERS#A CORE THEME OF THE IS#THE SINS OF THE FATHER#YOU CANT PICK ANS CHOOSE WHEN THAT IS RELEVANT
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every single thing said about kaz is just like, patently false to the point of irony. dirtyhands about a man whose hands are literally spotless because they're never uncovered. without morals or conscience, would do anything for money when it is repeatedly implied he's passed over business opportunities if they involved slavery or indentures. doesn't say goodbye, just lets go about a man who has made it a point to never let anything go. doesn't need a reason when he is proven to never act without a reason, and in all actuality usually has at least two. and this is without mentioning bastard of the barrel about probably one of the only barrel kids to have at least started out with a "normal", happy nuclear family...
and it just makes me think: kaz is deliberately written not to be better than people say he is, but just bad in different ways. he is not good or virtuous or compassionate; the point of having people say things that are not true about him isn't to make a point of his completely different nature.
so the point of it can only be to emphasize how nobody really knows him. to draw attention to his absolute isolation. and maybe to give more credit to how much his 'armour', which is supposed to protect him by keeping everyone away, really only serves to keep him away from everyone else.
#kaz brekker#six of crows#kaz brekker character analysis is living in my mind rent free this week#and not to make this post about kanej - but this whole narrative choice also emphasizes how inej is the only one he (somewhat) lets in#better terrible truths than kind lies etc etc etc#also this is why I am fundamentally against the idea that kaz only opposes indentures because of inej#and why I am also against the idea that kaz aspires to go honest/above board and rule ketterdam at some point#kaz is against indentures but he Will lie and cheat and blackmail his way to working against it.#kaz won't hurt children but his definition of what is OKAY to do with children is dubious to say the least.#kaz has done many things arguably benefitting other barrel rats - but he will be vehemently against 'cleaning up' the barrel#because he's genuinely too fucked up to wish someone a safe childhood in some mercher's house instead of fighting for their own fate#he's MORALLY GRAY. he is MY morally gray little barrel rat and you can pry him from my cold dead hands :)
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"it was great being a Ranger, Zordon" 💔
#power rangers#mighty morphin power rangers#jason david frank#tommy oliver#green ranger#💚🤍❤️#i couldn't find anything like this scene to just reblog so grabbed it myself#I've known jason david frank's name for about as long as I've known how to read#reading it right off the power rangers theme song#and his power ranger characters were such a fundamental part of my childhood#and shaping of my sense of narrative even when it comes down to it#the green as evil arc - coming back as the white ranger - the tommy/kimberly of it all#and above all tied to memories of watching the movie with my whole family#including my dad#it's a terrible news day but this one hits the little corner of my heart that loved the green ranger at age five
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Check Yes Chapter 7 part 1
in which the bats start to suspect that something is going on with Jason
Masterpost
“No, I'm at Jason's place,” Dick read out loud. “Have fun without me.” He put his hands on his hips. “I think I'm offended. Are you offended?”
Damian shrugged, cheeks hollowed around a juice box straw. He had under eye wrinkles from a long day of being a small child. Dick felt vaguely tempted to squish his cheeks, but the bites were still healing from last time and he needed dexterity to grapple.
“I'm deeply offended and think you should remind Jason who is the alpha older brother.” Tim didn't stop his keyboard mashing, splayed upside down on the back of the sofa. His neck was squashed at an uncomfortable looking angle. “Go get Duke and give him fundamental childhood memories. Now is your time to shine. Teach him how to ride a bicycle or Jason will do it for you.”
Dick hummed skeptically. He paced a little. “Duke probably knows how to ride a bike. But still.” He took a couple of steps while he wrestled with himself. “I know that you’re trying to encourage the worst in me.” He tapped his fingers against his hipbone rapidly.
It wasn’t going to work. He didn’t need to be competitive about this. Duke wasn’t really picking Jason over him, he was just- choosing to be with Jason instead of Dick. No big deal.
“Are you really going to take Jason take a W over you?” Tim didn’t even look over at him.
“He’s not winning anything.” Dick frowned at the distance, out the window. It was just that usually these few hours in between Duke’s patrol and bedtime lined up well with his free time after work, before patrol. He liked having the family together. He liked that they hung out in the TV room and fought for control of the TV. It built character, and he wasn’t saying that just because he usually won.
“He’s winning,” Tim said darkly. “You’re letting Duke get away from you.”
Dick ripped away Tim’s DS player and scowled down at him. “Stop trying to rile me up,” he demanded.
Tim gave him a shitty smile. “You’re right. It’s probably better if Duke hangs out with Jason. What’s one more bird who avoids the Manor? We can be a family from a distance. You don’t really need to see Duke grow up.”
“You suck.” Dick let go of the DS and stalked out of the TV room. He ignored the instant scramble behind him as Damian and Tim fought for control of the TV. Tim was probably doomed to two hours of Animal Planet, but Dick felt no mercy as he grabbed his riding jacket and jogged to the upstairs parking garage. He passed Bruce and they exchanged a silent nod.
Jason’s place was annoyingly far away from the Manor. Dick steamed inside his motorcycle helmet for the first ten minutes and then decided to be a better, more cheerful person, and also to do some recon. He called up Roy on his headset. “He-ey,” he sang with the line picked up.
“Dickie McDickface,” Roy said evenly. “Fancy hearing from you.”
“Oh please, McDickface is my father.” Dick swerved around a car that was merging without a turn signal and then gunned the engine so that he could get even with the driver and show them his middle finger. “You can just call me Baby.”
“Will do, sweet cheeks.” Something snapped in the background and then a humming started up. Microwave? “What’s up? You calling just to flirt or do you need to see my face?”
“Just thought of you,” Dick lied breezily. “Since I’m on my way to see my little wing and he’s tried so hard to subsume my place in your heart.” He tightened his grip on his motorcycle handles.
“You really don’t need to compete with him.” Roy said blandly. “You’re different people. I can have friendships with multiple people without one of them being the alpha friend.”
Dick made an unconvinced hum and took a sharp left turn onto the freeway. “If you say so. I’m not arguing with a man with beautiful brown eyes.”
Roy sniggered. “You’re terrible.”
Dick grinned. Gottem.
“I don’t think Jason wants my heart,” he said wryly. “You can relax.”
Dick got much tenser. “Oh?” he prompted. Say what you know! Reveal Jason’s secrets!
“I think he’s got someone else in the picture, he deep-cleaned his place again and last week he sent me pictures of him in three identical black leather jackets asking which gave off more of an air of careless sophistication.” A pan clattered.
“I’m sure they weren’t identical,” Dick said, a little distracted by how hopeless Roy always was about these things. “What were the lapels like?”
A few cars ahead sirens blared and then there was a momentous crash. Glass sparkled high in the air and someone skidded across the pavement while Roy chattered on.
“Anyway, I’m actually making dinner right now. Right, sweetheart? Wanna say hello to Uncle Dickie?” Roy cooed, voice going slightly unfocused as he moved away from the speaker.
A multi-car pileup crashed into place ahead of him.
“Oh, Lian is there!” Dick hit the brakes hard and safely settled to the side of the mess. “Hi, princess!” He puttered through the scene at a low speed, checking everyone out. “How was your day? Did you kick ass on the bar at preschool?” Fender bender, fender bender, angry woman obviously calling the police- seemed fine. Dick hit the throttle and passed the wreck on the side.
A faint childish voice spoke in the background, utterly incomprehensible. Roy translated after a second, deadpan. “Boy Wonder, she says that she conquered like a roman general. She was as powerful and beloved as the second- no, sorry, she said the first emperor of the Chin dynasty. Lian, I corrected- I said the first!”
Dick winced. “Yeah, the first emperor was better,” he said. Massive understatement. “So proud of you, Li-Li!”
“I better let you go. Take care, Dickie. Hope Gotham doesn’t treat you too mean.”
“Gotham is a sweetheart,” Dick said cheerfully. “Enjoy dinner!” He cut the call and grinned to himself, thinking over the new information.
His first thought was that Roy was off-base and Jason had cleaned his apartment because Duke was coming over. But Roy was right about the jacket– Jason wouldn’t be worried about his clothes to impress a sibling.
‘What does this have to do with Duke?’
He turned that part of the puzzle over in his mind as he approached Park Row. It could be a coincidence, sure, but he could smell something more interesting here. It made more sense for there to be a connection than for there to be two changes to routine in a short time frame.
The only thing to do about it was to let himself into Jason’s apartment building, hoist open the staircase window on the floor below Jason’s apartment, and free climb up the wall to let himself onto Jason’s balcony. Jason’s door was only accessible by code, and he was aiming for stealth this time. Dick hunkered down to listen closely.
Duke was definitely in there. He could hear the faint music of a boss battle coming from inside.
‘...That’s definitely weird,’ Dick noted, getting excited about it. ‘Jason doesn’t own games. What’s Duke got on him? Is it blackmail? What do I have to do to force Duke to tell me?’
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I could take the how to train your dragon books like 30% more seriously if the characters had normal names but no the writer of the books that fundamentally shaped my values and defined my childhood named her characters stuff like Fishlegs. Squidface the Terrible. Snotface Snotlout. Chucklehead. Literally Hiccup
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there is no such thing as a singular "true nature"
recently saw a (or rather, yet another) post dunking on jiang cheng for blaming wei wuxian and trying to strangle him after the fall of lotus pier. which is fair, because that honestly was rather terrible of him.
however, one specific aside in that post stood out to me:
as i saw in the post i'm now being a hater about, antis have the tendency of boiling down an entire character to just their worst moments. but the section i highlighted above interests me precisely because i think it sheds light on what logical fallacy causes the anti tendency towards this boiling-down.
one common thread i've seen across antis of all sorts of characters - whether the characters they're bashing be jiang cheng, jin guangyao, su minshan, or wei wuxian himself - is this idea of a singular "true nature." the idea is that people have a "true nature," which is typically hidden by polite manners and civilized society, but may then be exposed during moments of stress in which those manners are stripped away.
the implied corollary to this idea of a singular "true nature" that is only revealed on occasion, then, is the existence of "false natures": if the self that is exposed during moments of high duress is one's "true nature," then the self that is seen during moments of normalcy is not one's "true nature." one's "true nature" is determined from solely these moments of high duress; the "nature" implied by one's actions during all other times does not count. if we follow this framework, then the you who goes apeshit after a bad day is closer to your "true nature" than the you who has a normal day of fun with your friends; the you who goes apeshit after a bad day is more real than the you who has a normal day with friends; the you who goes apeshit after a bad day matters more in the cumulative assessment of your existence than the you on every other day of your life.
as you might expect, i don't agree with this worldview. i don't condone boiling an entire person down to their single most extreme moments, not only because it is uncharitable, but also because i don't accept this idea of a "true nature" to begin with. to make such sweeping statements about an individual's "true nature" is overly simplistic and reductive of the full complexity of humanity. furthermore, in order for the idea of [a true nature that is only revealed in moments of duress] to work, one must rank all of the actions and behaviors of an individual from least to most "true," as described above - but, in fact, everything an individual does makes up who they are.
there is no such thing as a singular "true nature." you are not some fundamental "true nature" hidden away under layers and layers of pretense. everything you do - not just the things you do in moments of duress - makes up your character. you are the sum of all of your actions, both mundane and extreme: the you who has a normal day with friends is very bit as true, as real, as the you who reacts in extreme ways in extreme circumstances.
jiang cheng is the person who blamed wei wuxian for the fall of lotus pier and tried to strangle him for it. jiang cheng is also the person who spent his childhood shielding wei wuxian from dogs. jiang cheng is also the person who loves jiang yanli and sincerely wishes for her happiness. jiang cheng is the person who repeatedly tried to warn wei wuxian from messing with lan wangji and who carried wei wuxian after he got beaten by the lan. jiang cheng is the person who feels his father loves wei wuxian more than him. jiang cheng is the person who failed to stand up for mianmian out of concern for his own sect. jiang cheng is the person who ran restlessly for seven days to rescue wei wuxian (and lan wangji) from the xuanwu's cave; jiang cheng is also the person who resented not being thanked for his hard work. jiang cheng is the person who spent 3 months tirelessly looking for wei wuxian. jiang cheng is the person who allowed wei wuxian to secede from yunmeng jiang without any support in order to keep yunmeng jiang safe. jiang cheng is the person who helped jiang yanli sneak into the burial mounds so that wei wuxian could see her wedding clothes. jiang cheng is the person who blamed wei wuxian for jiang yanli's death. jiang cheng is the person who led the first siege of the burial mounds. jiang cheng is not the person who killed wei wuxian.
jiang cheng is the person who blamed wei wuxian for the downfall of lotus pier and then tried to strangle wei wuxian for it. jiang cheng is also the person who, barely a few hours later, sacrificed his everything in order to save wei wuxian from the wens.
both of these statements are true. all of these statements are true. the fact that one of these statements is true does not stop any of the others from being equally true. the reason why i dislike this "true nature" framework so much is that it cherrypicks certain moments as unique truths at the cost of all others - it centers one specific moment as indicative of an individual's entire nature, and in doing so discards all other moments as mattering less. in favor of a singular, easily digestible statement (eg. "jiang cheng's true nature is one of selfishness"), it erases the full complexities and contradictions true to humanity.
it is erroneous to say that "jiang cheng trying to strangle wei wuxian indicates his true nature," because of all the other shit that jiang cheng did. it is ALSO erroneous to say that "jiang cheng sacrificing himself to save wei wuxian indicates his true nature," because of all the other fucking shit that jiang cheng did. the fact is that jiang cheng did both of those things and also a whole bunch of other shit, and we all just have to accept it.
what's funny here is that this same "true nature" thinking also gets applied to wei wuxian himself in-universe. to the general public in MDZS, wei wuxian is the guy who invented demonic cultivation, who created the weapon of mass destruction that was the yin tiger tally, who killed jin zixuan, who got jiang yanli killed, and who in a moment of extreme emotional distress killed over a thousand people at the nightless city pledge conference. in their discussions of wei wuxian, the public centers these specific acts as indicating wei wuxian's singular "true nature." everything else wei wuxian was - his inventiveness, his kindness, his selflessness, his playfulness, his genius - gets dismissed as "false natures" in comparison to the one "true nature."
but this isn't an accurate description of wei wuxian, because to take just wei wuxian's very worst moments and then make those moments his entire being is not fair. wei wuxian tortured countless wen cultivators during the sunshot campaign, wei wuxian killed jin zixuan and heavily injured jiang yanli before her death, wei wuxian killed over a thousand people at the nightless city pledge conference. wei wuxian also sacrificed his everything for jiang cheng, abandoned the easy way out in favor of protecting innocent people from suffering, and has repeatedly chosen to help others when he could have easily not done so. all of these statements are true. the fact that one of them is true does not prevent any of the others from being equally true. the wei wuxian who chose to help the wen remnants is every bit as real as the wei wuxian who killed over a thousand people at nightless city, and to take either of these moments and assert that it alone reveals a "true nature" while ignoring the other is to commit a logical fallacy.
tl;dr - people contain multitudes.
regarding what the op of the screenshot actually said: they are correct in that jiang cheng does display a repeated pattern of behavior in which he blames wei wuxian for his family's misfortunes and thus lashes out at wei wuxian. but the degree to which wei wuxian is actually blameless for this misfortune, i think, is much greyer than the op said.
#mdzs#jiang cheng#wei wuxian#jc apologism#sort of?#anyways the funny thing is that this “true nature” bullshit is also what su she gets hit with.#like dude did all sorts of stuff in his life but he repeatedly gets boiled down to a few specific bad moments#yanyan speaks
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I think that there’s a fundamental misunderstanding of what exactly is…happening with Izuku’s character. Specifically in regards to chapter 425.
I’m glad that a lot more people generally recognize that Izuku is not a character that can be read at a surface level, given that he’s both a repressed person with built up emotion of basically everything and also a very glaringly HUGELY unreliable narrator, but that doesn’t necessarily mean I agree with the ways I’ve seen this most recent chapter spoken about.
I see posts, comments, etc with ideas like “Izuku don’t suppress your emotions! Open up with people! It’ll be okay I promise!” When that’s fundamentally not what is happening here.
There’s always always ALWAYS been a distinct difference in character throughout horikoshi’s writing when he is showing that a character is:
A—Avoiding emotions, thoughts, ideas less than ideal for them. Not opening up when they probably should about their problems given that they’ve been handed the space to do so. Just genuinely not acknowledging, feeling, or expressing emotions that they don’t want.
B—Reflecting on the ways they feel about the world, themselves, or other people given their new perspective on a situation. Not outright reaching out to others to talk about these problems/feelings, but instead waiting until the moment they feel they have the most confidence to do so with their new outlook on their own life.
And genuinely, guys, to grab your BkDk attention rn, this is the exact reason why Ochako’s reflection on her feelings for Izuku and thereafter decision to pull away from them WAS NEVER GOING TO END IN OCHAKO EXPLODING WITH HER LOVE FOR HIM.
This was another common interpretation I saw of Ochako and Izuocha for a long time. That because she pushed these feelings away, they were somehow going to explode in this unbelievable way and she would “get the boy” because of it. That her arc would surround accepting her romantic feelings and that she can’t just push away how she feels for a career.
But yk. That didn’t happen. At all. Nowhere close even.
The same kind of goes for Katsuki, allmight, etc. They all had moments in their arc where it was spent genuinely reflecting, and the only reason we as the audience never connected it in the same ways we do ochako or Izuku was ALWAYS BECAUSE the narrative showed their inner thoughts while doing so (mostly because Allmight’s arc after losing OFA and Katsuki’s arc on what it means to be a hero were so intrinsically tied, both starting at the same time and ending at the same time during the final war. And because they were so tied this caused their own reflections, development, and thought process to be broadcasted to us frequently throughout their arcs… to each other. They also somewhat shared aspects with Izuku, but these were cherry picked more often than not, like dvk2 for example).
To us Katsuki never seemed to be.. idk, suppressing his anger in any way because we were always told what he was doing and why (side note: this is why I’ve always thought arguments against Katsuki were so weird, bc unlike characters like endeavor or Ochako he wasn’t like… hiding who he was and how he was changing. Ever. Like the audience knows at all times past basically season 3 what Katsuki is thinking and doing. Like how do you watch this happen, stare me dead in the eye, and tell me how much of a terrible and awful teenage boy he is. Like damn I didn’t think we were this dumb. This is also my theory as to why he’s most popular, his arc is very… in your face if that makes sense). Katsuki’s entire mini arc on reflecting his mistakes and his childhood and his future is spent TELLING YOU that it’s what he’s doing. (I’m referring mostly to the endeavor internship arc, the provisional license exam makeup, and basically everything in the war arc related to him leading up to bakugou Katsuki rising here)
And see, Horikoshi will stare you dead in the eye, tell you “this girl has taken into consideration that she doesn’t want to waste her time training her career focusing on a boy because he kinda caught her fancy”, and y’all will still say that this will explode in her face.
Y’all this is a series about learning how to manage emotions, maturity in relationship to one’s emotions, how to feel an emotion, but in a way that is helpful. Horikoshi isn’t telling you “go buck wild, feel everything all the time and always express it”, in fact he explores why you DONT do that! Through Toga or Shigaraki, they show how grief and anger can genuinely consume you. But he also shows why you shouldn’t just put everything in a box to never look at or acknowledge, or why you shouldn’t just let your grief destroy the world around you, or pretending that some emotions simply don’t exist.
I can’t say this enough, so let me say it now, mha is about the extremes of your psyche. That you should control something, but not too much. Everything can be harmful. Everything can be good.
Izuku is not controlling too much, he’s expressing just enough.
I LOVE shaming this dickhead at all times in all my posts. I love saying he’s an ignorant dipshit with a weird amount of distaste for a girl who just confessed to him. I’ve joked that chapter 348 is basically an entire chapter spent on Izuku calling Himiko a mean dyke. And yet I also believe he’s doing nothing WRONG here.
In fact, I’ll even say that this moment right here?
ISNT EVEN IZUKU DOING THE SOCIALLY APPROPRIATE THING ABOUT IT! But he’s still TRYING to reach out to someone he thinks MIGHT be able to understand. (And frankly, this moment is far deeper than what it’s being made out to be, to me it reads more like an unrequited friendship that Izuku both desires and has thought of them to have, while simultaneously showing the distance Ochako has successfully wedged between them for her own sake. Maybe it was always there though, maybe in weird, miscommunicated Horikoshi fashion, this is a representation of how Ochako always read all those “fun friend hangouts” as a little more than that, and without those feelings the friendship never really held any substance to her in the first place. Where Izuku saw his first real friend at UA, she saw little more than acquaintance)
Simultaneously, Izuku is genuinely reflecting on what it means for the world to change, to be a hero, to live after loss—and trying and failing to gain the connection he desires from individuals who can not and will not afford him that.
Izuku is ready for the world to change, a few select characters are also ready for the world to change (mirio, for example), but not nearly enough are. So maybe I’ll have to take this back if I’m proven wrong and I accidentally looked into this far past what everyone else did for no reason, but I genuinely believe with moments like this
And this
Aand this
That Izuku has come forward with that aspect of his character development. He’s reflecting on his new beliefs, not repressing his emotions for them.
#bkdk#I will also say that while Izuku did do a bit of a fake smile and attitude for Katsuki’s breakdown last chapter#he gets a bit of an excuse for that suppression. theres a time and place to be strong for a friend. and while izuku didn’t exactly say ALL-#the right things or think the right thoughts… he still imo fits into control your heart within that moment#you can ‘be strong’ for someone who’s sad or anxious without you being out to be an ultra suppressive self hating boy man#in that moment katsuki probably would’ve needed that if izuku had said literally anything else but ‘I’m glad I had this dream while it-#lasted!’ and ‘your probably just feeling very weird right now’… DUDE I CANNOT KEEP DEFENDING YOUR ASS#midoriya izuku#mha deku#bakudeku#bkdk brainrot#bnha deku#bakugou katsuki#mha analysis#deku midoriya#last side note lmao: I’ve done like five drafts for this and if this one isn’t good enough hopefully someone better than me can remake this#or I’ll make this at a later time when more things come out#I just knew I wanted this out before the next chapter leaks#which are probably tonight lolllll#oh and I proof read like 80% of this so y’all are getting what you fucking get
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Superboy 1994 is a story about cycles of abuse and nobody’s willing to take Knockout seriously.
Kay is a Fury who was raised by Granny Goodness who got away. I cannot underscore how fundamental this is to her character, her motivations, her goals, and everything she does.
Kay is an exotic dancer because it’s a job that pays the bills that requires no paperwork and exists on the margins of society. There is absolutely no way she’s legally on Earth let alone has residency or citizenship in America. From every indication, even Barda doesn’t know Kay’s here. She’s on the run from her past and equally she cannot face and analyse her own past, because she’s never had the time or support to stop and look the situation in the eye. Barda’s not like this? Well Barda’s older, stronger and had Scott to work through their issues together with. And even then both Barda and Scott are incredibly messed up. Kay’s sexuality is the only coin she has to barter, and one that she would have relied upon while still on Apokolips.
The way Kay treats and trains Kon is so tied up in what she experienced during her own training as a child on Apokolips. The comic even goes into this! We have flashbacks of Barda chaining a young Knockout in training up beside a volcanic pit and telling her that she has to keep quiet and endure and she can get through this. She’s positioned herself as Kon’s trainer, because she’s looked at him and realised he does not even understand how his own powers work properly, what his limits are, what he can and cannot do. And with her background, what ‘training’ looks like is incredibly unpleasant and boundary-crossing, but perceived as necessary, as that is what has kept Knockout alive.
Because yes, the way Kay treats Kon is grooming. She flaunts her sexuality at him, ignores his boundaries, calls him ‘pup’, kisses him without warning, keeps hinting that she wants to sleep with him and the narrative is the only thing that interferes with that. But you cannot approach this without acknowledging the incredible background of generational abuse that Kay is coming in carrying. She’s the only character in the early run who looks Kon in the eye and acknowledges he is a child, but also acknowledges he is a superhero expected to act as an adult and that that combination is terribly, horribly dangerous and Kon needs to be prepared.
Knockout didn’t have a childhood, and she looks at Superboy who also does not have a childhood and she tries to help him. Now this goes horribly, terribly wrong, and is abusive and not what Kon needs, but that’s why it’s about the cycles of generational abuse. Kay has escaped but she’s also not escaped. In her mind she is treating Kon so much better than Granny Goodness has ever treated a child.
(Also: Roxy Leech is another excellent example of how this comic is all about cycles of abuse. Roxy and the way she treats Kon is a lot more acceptable to audiences, but equally informed by her relationship with Rex Leech and her attempts to escape that cycle of abuse)
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not to be overly applying real life concepts to a silly cw show lol but there's also something very perfect-victimy about the way people dismiss dean's victimhood vs sam's. like because dean's sarcastic or represses a lot of emotion or something people dismiss the things he went through. like obviously HE wants to forget about it and pretend it didn't happen, that's the point! but why are so many people dumb enough to hop right on board with that and literally erase/ignore things that happened to dean in the show (oftentimes in favor of pretending they happened to sam instead lol)... idk it's just a very weird thing that makes me feel protective of dean's character and what he represents in a way i don't usually with fictional characters. i love sam too but some of the samgirls or whatever take on a very cutting and aggressive tone that's slightly upsetting sometimes ngl. it just feels weirdly personal, not even at dean as much as like. anyone who dares to relate to dean as a character
i happen to think this "silly cw show" is actually far better at depicting complex trauma than people give it credit for.
but yeah, you are spot on here. it's absolutely about creating a perfect victim in sam and hyperfocusing on that while throwing nuance and context out the window entirely. even going all the way back to their childhood where dean is held fully responsible for the ways he responded to john's abuse by adapting rather than rebelling. dean is either considered responsible for his own situation or not a victim at all. he "liked" it, he perpetuated the "cycle", he was a lost cause, he was inferior to sam (and people loooove being classist about this, they think they're comedians) etc. which of course is NOT AT ALL the narrative presented to us by the show and erases the fascinating ways the brothers' arcs were paralleled throughout the seasons. for example, in season 2 you have dean only starting to confront the million ways john messed him up when he's not around anymore, just as sam is confronting his own destiny. the show explicitly links these two things yet dean is somehow generally viewed as the brother who's in charge of his own life. dean, who was controlled by his father until he was 27 and already in 1x11 admitting to sam that he admired him for making his own choices. i can't stress enough how "the one and only victim sam who completely lacks autonomy" is a fandom invention. and for what?
what you said about feeling protective of dean i think has always been part of his appeal. sam always had dean looking out for him, dean had no one. sam, even at his lowest, fundamentally valued himself and his own personhood, dean could never afford to because the survival of his family was up to him. he never coddled himself or let himself off the hook for a single perceived failure and i'm supposed to pile on? nah. his anger is so explosive in later seasons because he was never free to express his own feelings growing up and go through the regular stages teenagers and young adults do. i think there's a big effort to erase these nuances because if the actual story is taken into account, then it's impossible to forget how much dean went through so sam wouldn't have to. that sadly also ignores the impact it had on their relationship with dean's buried resentment towards sam, as well as sam's guilt for not always being there for dean in return. nearly every terrible traumatic thing sam experienced over the duration of the show is something dean had experienced already. at my most cynical, i think the purpose of reframing dean as this all powerful oppressor is because sam can only win the trauma olympics if dean is no longer vulnerable at all, no longer dean. and yes the trauma olympics approach is pointless, but if they're gonna insist on going there first, i'm not gonna hold back.
i mentioned sam's flinching and how it's valued as a trauma response compared to dean's anger but the thing is...before the cage, sam used to rage at dean and the entire world. his own anger nearly ate him up which he acknowledges multiple times. yet again, back when dean was fresh out of hell and sometimes genuinely freaked out by sam, including when he flinched at sam using his powers, it's still perceived as dean being cruel and abusive to sam. if sam feels bad about the moral implications and consequences of his actions it's because dean won't instantly get over it and support him. if dean doesn't trust him, it must be dean's fault alone. sam is the only one whose pov is taken into consideration and the only one whose feelings can be hurt. so it is a perfect victim thing but also about how only one of them gets to lash out and be vindictive and messy and remain sympathetic and good. essentially, sam gets to be a person but dean can only ever be sam's own personal giving tree.
it's classic fandom woobification with the childish "my fave can do no wrong" rhetoric, but since it's 2024 it's now hidden behind words like autonomy/cycles/abuse and passed around as objective analysis.
#i'm not exaggerating when i'm saying that it's impossible to visit a blog without encountering these takes less than 10 seconds in#and because i know this will be willfully misinterpreted: no i'm not at any point arguing that dean is perfect#neither of them is perfect or has to be perfect is my entire point#they both hurt each other and i enjoy it. sam is not only ever punching up#if he's kind and patient with dean's anger in late spn it's because HE KNOWS WHAT THAT'S LIKE#spn asks
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so i'm writing a scene where jessie writes the entire story herself (the irony is not lost on me), and, it's supposed to be the most perfect world she can think of. it's impossible NOT to compare her decisions to ones that i've thought about drake making, their solutions to the same problems side-by-side. for example, jessie assumes that she cannot get around death being a necessity with life. obviously, the planet would overpopulate. people would get tired of being alive. she decides instead that death should be more like getting tired and going to sleep forever one day, without the aging or sickness. drake would never settle for allowing death. i've spent a lot of time idly trying to figure out how xe would change... well, with omnipotence, anything, everything, in order to accommodate this demand -- and there are many different ways, which can be flawed when interacting with other problems. but the important part is that drake wouldn't settle for death. drake makes a mandatory end result, takes the current reality, and works until the beginning and end goal meet. jessie doesn't challenge reality's initial stipulations or the basic arguments about the logistics of non-death, even with unlimited power. we know that jessie is more authority-oriented in her basic value system; it's obvious when she's a child, and it's obvious when she's a god. she had good parents and a happy childhood; the authority figures in her life provided what she needed if she listened (and if she didn't). it was in her best interest to develop a worldview where authority was Good; she had no need to question them. reality says there are limited resources, and we will fix it by making people and creatures die and become resources, and jessie said "okay, got it boss." drake didn't have terrible parents, but nonetheless had experiences of authority's failure that were deeply formative for xem. even if xyr parents had been perfect, the body dysphoria would have always meant the reality that was provided was not enough. if xyr body, arguably the most fundamental reality xe will ever know, trapped in it regardless of all other factors, doomed to die when it dies, was something xe had to question to find any happiness, it must be very easy to apply this mentality to other dissatisfactions with reality. drake's rigid and often extreme moral beliefs, while they may seem more like they should produce a ruthless dictator than jessie's emotionally-driven decision-making style, are intrinsically linked to suffering and a desire for relief from it. ironically, both of these characters deal with similar themes -- a desire for impossible realities, and a hatred for the world they live in with all of its imperfections. jessie's impossible desire may simply be the freedom from desire altogether; to finally for once not feel an emptiness radiating Want. drake's impossible desire is more straightforward and less easily described -- paradoxical self-actualization and ego death. their similarities make them fun to compare, because they really could not be more different. any which way, i wanted to write down these thoughts about the characters -- jessie in particular -- before they Disintegrated Into The Ether
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The Undeniable Queerness of Enchanté the Series
(thank you @ranchthoughts for letting me ramble about this in your inbox before turning my thoughts into a post)
there are bls and then there are bls. right? there are dead fish kisses and there are characters who kiss each other like their lives depend on it.
and enchanté firmly belongs in the second category. 1,500-word essay under the cut.
there is such a consistent and tangible queer undercurrent to everything that's happening on this show and i'm not just talking about the fact that several scenes look like they could be the opening scene of a gay porno. or the surprise bondage. or force in drag. or proposing marriage in front of the eiffel tower. no, there's this aching, desperate desire underlying everything. theo has--in addition to his main love interest--four very hot gay suitors who all very obviously desire him carnally... this is some sort of gay manic pixie dream boy wish fulfilment fantasy and i am absolutely eating it up.
there is a vibe to the show that @ranchthoughts called "fanfic-like", and i would argue that that's because enchanté is actually fanfiction of the little prince. (i'm planning on making a separate post soon about how the book was referenced on and used as inspiration for the show.)
enchanté is fully aware of its own fictionality. it is on-the-nose fictional. but that's what makes it so much fun--it's not trying to be something it isn't.
take the reading memories segments in episode 4 [3/4] for example: these scenes were incredibly cringe, like, full-on bad-green-screen terrible-costumes-and-wigs hilarious-acting cringe, but fully aware of their own cringe-ness. (also, gawin was both in drag and naked in the same scene as two different characters, like. get on enchanté's level.) (incidentally, can anyone tell me what character aou/phupha was supposed to be? i got detective conan, monkey d. luffy and momotarō for the others, but i'm stumped on phupha's character.)
and that self-awareness makes it camp! there is such a level of camp to the whole show which feels extremely intentional (especially in the first two thirds), almost like a meta-commentary: "this is the genre. we know it's stupid but we love it here", and i adore that. they know the tropes, they know the bl landscape, and they're just having fun with all of it.
and the whole set-up in itself is a queer allegory, isn't it? theo and akk are "from different worlds", so to speak, hindered in their love not just by their complete inability to communicate but also by their forced separation as children. when they meet again, theo doesn't really belong anywhere, he's an outsider both in france and in thailand, he is unable to act the way thai society expects him to act (e.g. failing to show the proper respect to the seniors), unable to get his parents to understand him while being actively lied to by them (the whole ocean of miscommunication in that family deserves its own post), harboring feelings for his childhood friend his whole life but unable to voice them in a normal sort of way, instead falling back on concocting the most convoluted, immediately backfiring plan to try to make akk jealous and get him to confess his feelings first.
theo is fundamentally isolated because he grew up between two cultures, and neither one quite fits him: when he's in france, he is comforted by thai food and the only people he's close with (his grandmother and sun) are from thailand like himself; but when he's in thailand, he can't quite get used to the social conventions and makes social blunders, he is very slow at writing in thai.
it's such a poignant queer allegory in my opinion. they didn't end up making as much a point of it on the show as they could have, but it very much informed my whole reading of the show and the characters. there is a sort of inability to articulate his experience surrounding theo that makes him even more isolated and screams "baby gay in need of a community" to me. having akk share his experience at the end is something that i'm not a big fan of for other, unrelated reasons (might make a separate post about enchanté's ending and why it fell flat for me), but when looking at it through this lens, it is the only way for akk to really get theo, to really understand his struggle on a fundamental level.
which brings me back to that desire i mentioned earlier: theo desires akk, very much so, there are a whole handful of scenes where akk gets close to him and theo closes his eyes, expecting to finally be kissed by him, but more than that, he desires understanding. he often brushes off his own difficulties and has a tendency to be emotionally clueless (for example about his parents' divorce), but what i see most in his character is the desire to be understood, to be seen by akk, for akk to see him for who he is and to love him for who he is. (akk, of course, has been doing both of those things all along. he's constantly taking pictures of theo, he's watching him through his window--with theo's full knowledge--he is always looking at him, he's always loving him.)
it's not inherently queer to want to be loved as we truly are, i believe heterosexual people experience this, too, but in the context of queerness itself, being perceived as queer by other queer people is indeed a fundamental aspect to experiencing queer love (maybe not in gay for you bls, but i haven't heard of much gay for you happening in real life). not to be unscientific about this, but the vibes of the perception aspect of enchanté are just very queer to me, you know?
oh, and speaking of desire: enchanté in general is very physical. there is a level of intimacy between the actors and the camera that seems incredibly intentional: there are several shower scenes, scenes of theo and akk shirtless, TWO (2) nude gawin scenes (though one of those is sadly a fake-out and he is actually wearing shorts), many, many scenes that include bare feet, which is not something i see super often in bl, at least not to the point that i notice the frequency of it.
enchanté is very rooted in the physical reality of desirable bodies: theo is allowed to openly, physically flirt with saifa, even though that's not even his endgame love interest, phupha uses physical touch in his pursuit of theo, natee shows his obsession with theo by drawing his face/body about a hundred times, and akk and theo are wholly unable to keep their hands off each other. i've joked about the intricate rituals, but seriously, they are constructing so many intricate rituals. there are two separate scenes in which they make up excuses to kiss each other's elbows/arms/backs. they keep touching each other in a thousand ways, in every possible way they can that is still plausibly deniable as physical desire--until they kiss while watching that movie and then it's just a game of chicken of who will confess first. because their physical attraction to each other is undeniable. it's obvious. this was really refreshing to see in a genre that so often plays with the blushing maiden trope, and one character is so often made to pursue the other: on enchanté, akk and theo are equally horny for each other. it's not their lack of physical attraction that keeps them apart for so long.
(sadly, the show then shies away from actually getting very sexually physical: after their desperate, stunning, amazing balcony-kiss, they aren't allowed to be horny for each other in the last two episodes, when they're actually in a relationship. this is just one of the many aspects that i didn't like about the conclusion of the story, because you simply cannot tell me that these two as we got to know them in episodes 1 to 8 would really be as chaste with each other as they're shown in episodes 9 and 10.)
leaving that aside for the moment, let's talk about that kiss. as mentioned right at the beginning, when these two kiss each other on the balcony, it's desperation in its rawest form. these two--and especially theo--crave each other. theo kisses akk like he will die without him. theo kisses akk like he can finally breathe. theo kisses akk like he never wants to do anything else ever again.
i'm a bit obsessed with book's acting here, because of all the kissing scenes i've seen him in, i think this is THE most desperate one. force plays it a bit more subtle, but book's expression is full-on anguish. theo waited his whole life to be kissed by akk, and book portrays that so beautifully, with such depth. it's one of my favorite bl kisses for sure, it's played with so much heart, so much feeling, that it's hard to even think of kisses that compare, apart from the bad buddy episode 5 rooftop kiss.
anyway, all of this to say that enchanté to me is deeply, lovingly queer, and it's a shame that so many people are sleeping on it. (and that includes myself, i was wary about watching this show for a long time because i'd heard so many negative things about it.)
but i'm here to tell you: watch enchanté. it's wonderful, it's hilariously funny, it's endearing, it has book and force in it, and it is extremely queer.
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Yes, young Regina deserved happiness and good parents and a loving partner of her own choosing.
Yes, young Regina deserved a safe childhood that we know she did not get.
Yes, she deserved to be free, to have good influences in her life that would’ve helped her in the way she needed. She deserved so much better than Cora, and Leopold, and Rumple. (And Henry Sr. but I digress.) And yes, that is SO important to acknowledge.
But no, her being a victim of abuse does. Not. Absolve. Her. Of. Any. Of. Her. Crimes.
Her taking accountability for the ways she’s fucked up, even in cases where it’s truly not her fault (ex: “I don’t know how to love very well”) is so fundamental and NECESSARY for her as a character. She has spent her entire life trying to put herself back together by blaming someone else and it quite literally drove her mad.
She was crazy with revenge, and she committed really terrible shit, and the vast majority of the characters around her are quite justified in their negative feelings towards her. That’s why they literally spend 5 ENTIRE SEASONS working on her redemption. We’re sympathetic towards her, esp in S2 and beyond, but only because we’re getting the backstory. It doesn’t mean she’s justified, it means that the Evil Queen wasn’t borne from nothing.
Yes, she just wanted to be happy, and yes, that seems harmless. But she hurt people in insanely horrific ways, and at a certain point in her life, she didn’t deserve happiness without change.
And I think it’s kind of ridiculous to ignore that, especially with an entire storyline basically telling you, “hey- don’t do that”
#mandatory disclaimer that I absolutely love Regina#unfortunately she’s so me#like I was hyperfixated on her last year and literally sobbed because I had to make sure she got her happy ending#very normal#once upon a time#regina mills#ouat
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obviously ginny always holds a candle for harry and her feelings for him never really go away, but what do you think is the point when her feelings change from a childhood crush to realised actual adult feelings?
(I love this question so here I am, back on my bullshit with another Hinny meta not a single soul asked for)
“— how she didn’t think famous, good, great Harry Potter would ever like her…” “She thought you might take a bit more notice if I was a bit more — myself.””
There’s a huge gulf from the Ginny being talked about in that first quote and the Ginny speaking in the second. When and how Ginny gets from one to the other - both a new way of seeing herself, and holding a new, healthier set of feelings for Harry that he will return and deeply value - is tricky to parse out because of how much Ginny’s growth clearly happens off-stage (and is… criminally underwritten). But I do think it’s clear that that this shift does happen but I actually hadn't ever really thought about it properly before lol sooo I have been scratching my head over this one since you sent this ask.
The headline is: I basically think Ginny’s crush dies in the chamber. As early as Ginny’s second year, in PoA, she’s made a decision to cope with Harry’s inevitable presence in her life, and that’s to have her feelings be less about revering him, and more about making him feel supported and loved, both by her and by her family. She makes her feelings less about who she is relative to him, and much less about an immediate hope of reciprocation, and more about reinforcing in Harry a sense of his own worth and value as something that need not be a comment on her own. As they both grow up, and she gets to know him better, I think she starts to understand that they are fundamentally incredibly similar people. She learns that she has a unique understanding of him that other characters don’t, someone who she can help be better, and ultimately someone she knows how to love well and someone who knows how to be loved by him. And that in part is a testament to how much work she does - with the help of good guidance - to like herself and like what she brings to the table, both in seeing the parts of her that are similar to Harry and liking them, and in being confident that the parts of her that are different to Harry can be ways of understanding him and loving him in ways he really needs. Basically, when Ginny starts to see herself as somebody worthy of love and similar to Harry, not someone unworthy and defined by their inadequacy relative to Harry, that’s when the crush is gone and the real feelings emerge. I think that level of self growth starts to happen much earlier in canon for Ginny than it does for lots of her peer characters, especially Harry, Ron, and Hermione.
Full reasoning is below the cut, and I am using the word reasoning loosely, because there is absolutely no rhyme or reason why I have written as many words on this question as I have. Ask me a Ginny question and I will act up, apparently
The crush
What’s really significant about Ginny’s crush on Harry (and is imo quite overlooked) is that it’s defined by an incredibly low sense of self-worth and a terrible loneliness on little Ginny’s part. Riddle tells Harry how Ginny feels about herself, and tbh it’s absolutely fucking heartbreaking. Obviously, this version of Ginny’s sense of self is refracted through Riddle’s most uncharitable telling, but I think we should take it as containing at least an element of truth (because what makes Riddle such a master manipulator is his capacity to understand people’s fears and anxieties, and to play to them):
‘Little Ginny’s been writing in it for months and months, telling me all her pitiful worries and woes — how her brothers tease her, how she had to come to school with secondhand robes and books, how —” Riddle’s eyes glinted “— how she didn’t think famous, good, great Harry Potter would ever like her…” ‘No one’s ever understood me like you, Tom… I’m so glad I’ve got this diary to confide in… It’s like having a friend I can carry around in my pocket…”
The Ginny we get a sense of in these lines is of someone who thinks very little of themselves, who is defined by friendlessness, and has so deep a sense of isolated inadequacy she very easily becomes dependent on someone who shows her the first bit of genuine interest and makes her feel worth listening to. Obviously, Ginny is very loved at this stage, by both her parents and her brothers, but she’s not really seen, and she clearly feels both alone and deeply insecure. Unlike Ron’s way of dealing with his own sense of inadequacy, which is expressed, at various stages, through jealousy and resentment, Ginny feels her inadequacy into a crush that isn’t just about how great Harry is, but how great Harry is compared to her, and how unworthy she is of his attention. She doesn’t seem to have close friends, she has no-one who sees her as an equal, no emotional support that meets her where she’s at, and she is deeply doubtful that she deserves more. (I don’t want to say Ginny/Snape parallels but uhhh well........ you know)
There are elements of the crush that will remain a constant in Ginny’s feelings towards Harry throughout the series. She'll remain extremely protective of him ("Leave him alone, he didn't want all that"), she'll continue to admire him a great deal, and obvs she … fancies him. But the crush and her later feelings for Harry are clearly pretty distinct. When we see glimpses of her crush in other scenes - at the Burrow, in Diagon Alley, in the Valentine’s incident - it’s an endearing but ultimately juvenile, all-consuming view of Harry, in that way that crushes often are when you’re very young, but also one that speaks to her inability to see Harry as a real person and, especially, a person who is not better than her. Her crush isn’t empowering, but humiliating. It's something over which she has no control, and experiences publicly and very bodily (the whole-body blush, the physical clumsiness of knocking everything over, hiding behind doors and watching him at the Burrow). When she writes and commissions the Valentine, she talks about his appearance and his legacy in such a telling way. ‘I wish he was mine, he’s really divine’ isn’t the line of a confident person shooting their shot - it’s hero worship from someone who very much does not think themselves worthy of worship, and therefore direct adoration upwards at the person they’ve put on a pedestal. Although she’s not exactly asking Harry out directly with the Valentine (it’s supposed to be anonymous, and it’s only outed as Ginny by Malfoy), she pitches herself to Harry as someone who is in awe of him and really fancies him, but gives no sign of a capacity for great mutual understanding, no demonstration of their (many) similarities, no sign of deep care and no kind of pitch for her self as someone great who deserves love, someone funny, clever, and attractive, the traits that will later define the Ginny Harry falls for.
Leaving the crush behind
I think the aftermath of the Chamber is really significant for Ginny’s changing feelings for Harry. Leaving aside the lingering trauma of possession and her near-death experience, it’s hard to overstate how absolutely fucking awful it would be to interact with Harry after that. It’s not just that Riddle reveals the depth of little Ginny’s clearly intense feelings for him to Harry - mortifying enough - it’s that Riddle told Harry that Ginny’s obsession with him meant she inadvertently fed Riddle information that would render Lily Potter’s sacrifice moot, cost Harry his life and bring Voldemort to some form of power again. Though of course what Ginny reveals to Riddle isn’t an active betrayal of the Pettigrew vein, there are few consequences of having a crush that would be worse than the person you have a crush on nearly being killed because of it. A very reasonable response would have been to avoid Harry forever, and try and put that whole episode, and her feelings for him, to bed.
But she… doesn’t do that. Of course, Harry’s in her life whether she likes it or not. But she doesn’t have to become who she does become to him by OotP, and it’s clear then that she actively makes a series of choices to turn her feelings for him into something that is useful and kind for Harry: something that helps him and improves him, rather than starting at a point of thinking he’s perfect. Her appearances in GoF and even PoA lay the groundwork for the approach to him that she’s mastered by OotP. In PoA - so in the aftermath of this experience where Harry is the person who serves as the biggest reminder of her ordeal, and also Riddle’s chief victim - other than her awkward hello in Diagon Alley, the only reminder of Ginny’s feelings for Harry come when she leaves him the get well card she makes for him in the hospital wing. Harry’s narration implies the get well soon card is an expression of Ginny’s crush: he describes her as “blushing furiously”. But both making and delivering the card takes a huge amount of courage, and it’s a fundamentally selfless gesture - it’s literally a wish for him to get better, to make him feel like someone cares about his welfare, and a sign she is already starting to try and channel her feelings for him into something kind and supportive.(Obviously he… hates that the card sings so, you know, swing and a miss on execution, but she’s trying). Other than that, she only pops up to briefly share a private laugh with Harry over Percy (the first one-on-one injection of humour to their relationship), and to console Ron and reprimand the twins when Scabbers ‘dies’, establishing her as someone who acts with love and kindness, even if not directed at Harry himself.
In GoF, Ginny comes closer to honing this approach. She blushes when she sees Harry again at the Burrow, but she also then talks with confidence and humour in front of him with relatively little effort. She really reaches a crossroads over the Yule Ball, where she sets herself on the path away from validation from Harry and towards a stronger sense of who she is and what she believes in. She doesn’t ask Harry to the Yule Ball, even though several other characters do ask him out. She doesn’t chance rejection, but nor does she risk mortifying him. When Ron suggests she go with Harry, she turns him down and honours her commitment to Neville, something she finds difficult but is her choosing who the person she wants to be: someone who does the right thing, the selfless thing, who doesn’t ask Harry to validate her, but also who won’t accept the idea of being an afterthought last-option invite for Harry Potter. Because we’ll later be told, by Hermione, that Ginny met Michael Corner at the Yule Ball, I think we’re supposed to take Christmas 1994 as the period where Ginny starts to actively turned a corner in her feelings for Harry. With Hermione’s help (and I think it is this Christmas where Hermione advises Ginny on this), Ginny resolves to seek out romantic companionship elsewhere, where she will be able to be herself - something that might attract Harry in the long-run, but that will have its own value, too. The time where Ginny's sense of her own worth was calibrated around how much better than her she thought Harry was is increasingly in the rear-view mirror.
After the crush
By the time we get to the summer of OotP, something really big has shifted in Ginny’s mind about how she is going to be around Harry and what he is to her. The depth of Ginny’s growth, self-improvement and self-knowledge is on full display here, and she’s clearly reached a relative peace with herself. She has a confidence she didn’t have before; she’s got clear skills and abilities that mark her out as talented and assured (including Quidditch, but also her sense of humour and magical abilities); she’s actually shown herself capable not just of controlling her bodily and emotional responses to Harry, and also become an incredibly sophisticated liar (lol); and, crucially, she’s no longer lonely but surrounded by friends and in a romantic relationship that seems to be stable and healthy enough for a fourteen year old relationship, a real fuck-you to Tom Riddle. From the very start of OotP (“I thought I’d heard your voice”, “We know, Harry”), she can see what she’s become towards Harry: a shrewd reader of him, empathetic, supportive, forgiving, someone rooting for him, wanting good things for him and for him to grow and mature in happy, healthy ways, unafraid to call him out or help him grow when he’s displaying destructive coping mechanisms, lashing out or craving the approval of unworthy peers, and, crucially, someone who has pushed any thought of reciprocation to the back of her mind.
She also really understands who Sirius is to Harry in such a deep and profound way. Over the prefects issue, she’s the one who instigates of the conversation that consoles him over the Prefects issue - she’s the one who draws Sirius in as someone whose example (as a person who clearly was not a Prefect) will be a comfort to him (as well as just like, giving him valuable bonding moment with his godfather and knowledge of his father at school):
“What about you, Sirius?” Ginny asked, thumping Hermione on the back. Sirius, who was right beside Harry, let out his usual barklike laugh. “No one would have made me a prefect, I spent too much time in detention with James. Lupin was the good boy, he got the badge.”
On the train, when Ron and Hermione go to the Prefects carriage and Harry feels suddenly bereft, it’s Ginny alone who stays with him and agrees to sit with him on the train, finding the carriage with Neville and Luna to sit with, even though she’s with Michael at this point. Does Ginny still hold a torch for him? Sure, but she’s still holding a torch in sixth year, and she’s happy to leave him on his own on the train then. She decides in this moment Harry’s need is great, and wants him to not feel alone on his first train ride without Ron. She also shows here that she’s matured and grown up a lot more than he is in some significant ways. She doesn’t share his acute embarrassment about Neville and Luna, and she sorts him out after the Stinksap debacle, helping his embarrassment in front of Cho. Obviously there’s the ‘lucky you’ scene (side note: I love Ginny’s at his side on the tube as soon as they leave St Mungo’s after the conversation about possession). The ‘lucky you’ scene does not scream ‘please love me I’m so in love with you’. It’s a sign of deep care for a person, but it’s the behaviour of a person who no longer gives much of a fuck about being thought well of - they want to be helpful, it’s a very selfless kind of love, but she’s sort of over expecting things of him.
The Easter egg scene is another case in point of someone who clearly has some level of deep feelings for someone else - as evidenced by their obvious close knowledge of that person developed through watching them closely and generously - but who has turned them into something directed and selflessly productive. We can see that Ginny’s approach has meant something to Harry even if he hasn’t really clocked it. That he gets upset over the Easter egg certainly speaks to how much distress he’s in, but it also speaks to a subconscious feeling of being in the presence of someone who allows him to let his guard down, even if he's baffled as to why his body has behaved like this. Fifteen year old Harry sits, despairing over his fifteen year old father’s failings, grappling with his doubts about his parents’ path to romantic love, consoled by the thought that “his mother had been decent” - when Ginny enters, reaching through fifteen year old Harry’s own failings (irascibility, self-isolation) and gets through to what he needs. Selflessly, she suggests he tries to talk to Cho. She demonstrates strong emotional intelligence towards him, she delivers him a path to getting what Harry really wants - a conversation with the one person he sees as family, about his dad. That Ginny is the person who makes possible Harry’s one conversation about James with Remus and Sirius is so significant (and why I’ll always be mad that JKR cut the plan to have Harry literally confess the James memory to Ginny in the library and then mention Ginny’s advice to Sirius and Remus. The cut “That’s what Ginny said” line that Harry was supposed to say to Sirius and Remus from the JKR OotP planning notes lives in my head not just rent free but claiming full squatters’ rights).
Even more significantly in OotP, Harry quietly shows her that, while there’s a lot to admire about him, and lots of empathise with, there’s also a lot to be disappointed with him in. I think this only cements Ginny’s sense that her approach is the right one, and avoids setting herself up for further disappointment. The truth is that Harry lets her down several points in OotP, not just in the ‘lucky you’ scene. On the train, he is at least a bit embarrassed by her - not as much as he is of Neville and Luna, but certainly doesn’t think of her as a “very cool person”. Harry spends the whole book screaming at everyone for information, feeling frustrated about being patronised and deemed too young, but does the same thing to Ginny four times: once, at Grimmauld Place, where he lets Molly remove her from the room and makes no case for her entitlement to knowledge, and then three separate times after he's had the vision of Sirius being tortured:
“Hi,” said Ginny uncertainly. “We recognised Harry’s voice — what are you yelling about?” “Never you mind,” said Harry roughly. Ginny raised her eyebrows. “There’s no need to take that tone with me,” she said coolly. “I was only wondering whether I could help.” “Well, you can’t,” said Harry shortly. “You’re being rather rude, you know,” said Luna serenely.
And then again a few pages later in the Forest:
“I’ve got a broom!” said Ginny. “Yeah, but you’re not coming,” said Ron angrily. “Excuse me, but I care what happens to Sirius as much as you do!” said Ginny, her jaw set so that her resemblance to Fred and George was suddenly striking. “You’re too —” Harry began. “I’m three years older than you were when you fought You-KnowWho over the Sorcerer’s Stone,” she said fiercely, “and it’s because of me Malfoy’s stuck back in Umbridge’s office with giant flying bogeys attacking him —” “Yeah, but —”
One more time for emphasis, Harry, there's not enough salt in that wound:
“Look, you three” — he pointed at Neville, Ginny, and Luna — “you’re not involved in this, you’re not — ”
I think this is in part why Ginny moves onto Dean so quickly at the end of the OotP year and doesn’t wait around to see if post-Cho Harry is interested in something. Obviously, she would see and respect the enormity of Harry’s grief. But she has just spent a year receiving confirmation that Harry doesn't see her as an equal and doesn't seem to intend to meet her emotional needs in any of the ways she has learned to meet his. She dumps Michael because she knows what she’s worth, and though she’s briefly single she fills Michael’s space with someone else who clearly admires and values her, something Harry has shown no sign he is capable of doing (yet). She leaves OotP having found a way of being around Harry that works for her, that offers him meaningful friendship and support, and that both sees him and sees through him. She’s not about to ask for more, out of respect for him but also out of self-preservation. (I think she is also beginning to grasp that if anything ever did happen with Harry, it would be temporary, in ways that colour her approach to it, too.)
All this is to say, by the time we get to HBP, Ginny has five years post-crush under her belt of overcoming the unhealthy and toxic aspects of her feelings for Harry, honing who she is to Harry and living with her feelings for him, and also just... becoming someone she herself likes and who she believes deserves love and respect. Her feelings aren’t gone, but she’s built a life that doesn't centre them, and she’s happy with who she is to Harry, and how she can make him feel loved without asking for romantic love in return. The trouble for her is that Harry’s about to have an absolute shocker and realise their significance to one another in ways that threaten the equilibrium she’s found. But that's the trouble when you have a massive sense-of-self glow-up Gin! Sometimes people clock them and go: wow wait. So sorry baby you did this to yourself!
#hinny#meta#what am i like#a nightmare#apparently!#i know it's annoying to say 'no-one talks about this' but no-one talks about how low ginny's self worth was at the start of CoS!#ron and percy: i'm the most insecure weasley#ginny age 11: hold my cup full of rooster blood#thank you anon! ❤️
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Do you feel like you like FCG more now *because* of how much he originally grated on you? Because I’ve been feeling lately like that. Like I see him now and part of what I enjoy is how very much he’s grown as a person from the (sorry Sam) painfully unpleasantly awkward/nosy guy he was. I like him more because of how much he bothered me to start. If not that, what else do you feel had fueled your shift in feelings, I’d love to hear!
Good question! I don’t know if it’s that he was grating early on so much that the things that were issues for me early on have since been resolved in-game as part of a compelling and well-crafted arc. There are characters who have great character arcs whom I’ve loved start to finish, but it is true that there’s something uniquely satisfying when a character you didn't like turns around, and this is by far the most dramatic turnaround I've experienced in actual play.
I didn’t mind the awkwardness, and the nosiness was a bit irritating, but for me the problems were much more the constant people-pleasing/terrible therapy from someone who didn’t seem to have any awareness combined with the fact that a sourceless cleric is not interesting to me at all, and Sam was having a difficult time with the mechanics which is somewhat unforgivable in a party with two glass cannons.
All of that has since been fixed. I think the subclass is still in need of retooling, but now that the party has more HP and FCG themself has more options, Sam is less reliant on the mechanics I disliked and much more comfortable with more standard cleric options. FCG developing a sense of personhood and approaching his interests out of genuine curiosity and wistfulness about the experiences he cannot have rather than the obsequious “oh, I’m just a machine” has been a joy to watch. And, of course, they’re engaging with a deity! They’re exploring faith in a way we really haven’t seen before; all our past clerics have been clerics since childhood, and the pathway to being a paladin is fundamentally different. Finding out more about Aeor, and his connection with FRIDA are both icing on the cake - really, all I needed was an arc about FCG finding a source of faith (deity-based or conceptual) and coming to terms with being a real person, and, like Ashton, I couldn’t be prouder of them.
If I may: I think of the cast, Sam is not necessarily graceful or subtle at dropping hints and working in a picture of what’s there without explicitly saying it (I've talked about this as negative space), but he is extremely good at understanding the structure of a story and that this is work that needs to be done. Think of Nott spending an hour disguised as a halfling in a cafe, or Scanlan doing drugs, or FCG being weird about birds and talking about their past party. It's necessary groundwork to be laid, and it’s infinitely better to lay it on thickly or imperfectly than to not do it at all. As a result, sometimes Sam's characters do take longer to grow on me, but they consistently have; the turnaround for FCG was just the sharpest.
I think because FCG was built around a particularly complicated reveal, it was rough until we hit Breaking Point. Because he was so focused on putting those dominoes in place, he was holding back too much on everything else. Once we had that reveal it felt like Sam could actually breathe. The confirmation FCG had a soul came not long after and everything since then has been a wonderfully explored arc of someone coming at the problem of “who am I and where do I fit in to the world” from several different directions.
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Should Azure Moon Have a "Silver Snow" Option?
Short answer. No. Long answer. See below.
People sometime claim that Azure Moon should've had its own "Silver Snow," meaning an option to leave Dimitri as an alternative Blue Lions path like Silver Snow and Crimson Flower do for the Black Eagles.
This showcases a fundamental misunderstanding of just about every single Blue Lion character and most of the Black Eagles too for a few reasons.
Self-Defense vs Invasion
Pretty straight forward. In Crimson Flower, you're choosing to inflict violence on people in the name of Edelgard's vision. In Azure Moon, you're "choosing" to defend yourself from that violence. For the Black Eagles, that's a much more active choice. You are choosing to force bloodshed on people who have never harmed you and likely never would. It's a much more weighty decision. They have to believe in Edelgard enough to kill innocent people for her. All the Blue Lions are choosing is to struggle to defend their homeland from an invasion. This makes the "branching off" from Edelgard much more necessary and have a much bigger impact than "branching off" from Dimitri would.
Edelgard as She Is vs Dimitri as He Could Be
When you side with Edelgard, you are siding with her as she is now. When you side with Dimitri, you are siding with who he could be.
Both Edelgard and Dimitri do things that the player may disagree with. The key difference is that Dimitri's actions are seen as something that needs to change. No one is supporting him while he does terrible things.
This is not true with Edelgard. When you side with her, you are agreeing with everything objectionable that she does and becoming an active participant in all her dirty laundry.
The Blue Lions/Azure Moon needs Dimitri to change. The Black Eagles are choosing or not choosing to support Edelgard as she is, but there's no promise of change.
Edelgard is in Her Right Mind vs Dimitri's Breakdown
Strongly related to the point above, but everything Edelgard does, she does fully in her right mind. Dimitri's in the middle of a mental breakdown. When healthy, Dimitri would never do what he's doing. Edelgard is healthy and doing what she's doing. Once again, this circles back to you choosing to support Edelgard's controversial actions, but not Dimitri's, which is why the split is necessary for the Black Eagles and makes no sense for the Blue Lions.
Childhood Friends vs Classmates
Sort of self-explanatory. Most of the people who are dealing with Dimitri and his bad behavior are people who have known him for years and have formed deep bonds with him. They know him at his best too.
Edelgard is not nearly as close to her classmates, and all the time they spent together - she spent it lying to them and putting them in danger.
It makes far more sense for friends (some more like family) to try and bring a loved one back from the brink every single time than support your class president (and country's heir) who spent the whole semester lying to you and just ordered her goons to murder you every single time. It makes way more sense for the Black Eagles to potentially leave Edelgard than the Blue Lions leave Dimitri.
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