#retain top employees

[sprintrecruiting]

Nurturing Employee Loyalty: Effective Strategies for Retaining Top Talent during Economic Challenges

In today’s business landscape, retaining top talent is vital, especially when faced with economic challenges. A retention strategy becomes a priority for businesses striving to overcome tough times. With talented individuals being the most valuable asset to a company, it becomes crucial to create an environment that nurtures their growth, engagement, and loyalty. Effectively engaging and…

[interiorergonomics]

5 Top Benefits of Accessibility in the Workplace

Workplace accessibility refers to the design and adaptation of work environments to its users and stakeholders. This ensure that all employees, regardless of their physical abilities, can access, navigate and fully participate in the workplace. This includes; Using accessible office furniture Technology Integration with in infrastructures Implementation of policies and practices to support…

[rickgoodman]

The Ultimate Guide to Retaining Top Talent: Expert Advice

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Antitrust is a labor issue

I'm touring my new, nationally bestselling novel The Bezzle! Catch me SATURDAY (Apr 27) in MARIN COUNTY, then Winnipeg (May 2), Calgary (May 3), Vancouver (May 4), and beyond!

This is huge: yesterday, the FTC finalized a rule banning noncompete agreements for every American worker. That means that the person working the register at a Wendy's can switch to the fry-trap at McD's for an extra $0.25/hour, without their boss suing them:

https://www.ftc.gov/news-events/news/press-releases/2024/04/ftc-announces-rule-banning-noncompetes

The median worker laboring under a noncompete is a fast-food worker making close to minimum wage. You know who doesn't have to worry about noncompetes? High tech workers in Silicon Valley, because California already banned noncompetes, as did Colorado, Illinois, Maine, Maryland, New Hampshire, North Dakota, Oklahoma, Oregon, Rhode Island, Virginia and Washington.

The fact that the country's largest economies, encompassing the most "knowledge-intensive" industries, could operate without shitty bosses being able to shackle their best workers to their stupid workplaces for years after those workers told them to shove it shows you what a goddamned lie noncompetes are based on. The idea that companies can't raise capital or thrive if their know-how can walk out the door, secreted away in the skulls of their ungrateful workers, is bullshit:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/02/02/its-the-economy-stupid/#neofeudal

Remember when OpenAI's board briefly fired founder Sam Altman and Microsoft offered to hire him and 700 of his techies? If "noncompetes block investments" was true, you'd think they'd have a hard time raising money, but no, they're still pulling in billions in investor capital (primarily from Microsoft itself!). This is likewise true of Anthropic, the company's major rival, which was founded by (wait for it), two former OpenAI employees.

Indeed, Silicon Valley couldn't have come into existence without California's ban on noncompetes – the first silicon company, Shockley Semiconductors, was founded by a malignant, delusional eugenicist who also couldn't manage a lemonade stand. His eight most senior employees (the "Traitorous Eight") quit his shitty company to found Fairchild Semiconductor, a rather successful chip shop – but not nearly so successful as the company that two of Fairchild's top employees founded after they quit: Intel:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/10/24/the-traitorous-eight-and-the-battle-of-germanium-valley/

Likewise a lie: the tale that noncompetes raise wages. This theory – beloved of people whose skulls are so filled with Efficient Market Hypothesis Brain-Worms that they've got worms dangling out of their nostrils and eye-sockets – holds that the right to sign a noncompete is an asset that workers can trade to their employers in exchange for better pay. This is absolutely true, provided you ignore reality.

Remember: the median noncompete-bound worker is a fast food employee making near minimum wage. The major application of noncompetes is preventing that worker from getting a raise from a rival fast-food franchisee. Those workers are losing wages due to noncompetes. Meanwhile, the highest paid workers in the country are all clustered in a a couple of cities in northern California, pulling down sky-high salaries in a state where noncompetes have been illegal since the gold rush.

If a capitalist wants to retain their workers, they can compete. Offer your workers get better treatment and better wages. That's how capitalism's alchemy is supposed to work: competition transmogrifies the base metal of a capitalist's greed into the noble gold of public benefit by making success contingent on offering better products to your customers than your rivals – and better jobs to your workers than those rivals are willing to pay. However, capitalists hate capitalism:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/04/18/in-extremis-veritas/#the-winnah

Capitalists hate capitalism so much that they're suing the FTC, in MAGA's beloved Fifth Circuit, before a Trump-appointed judge. The case was brought by Trump's financial advisors, Ryan LLC, who are using it to drum up business from corporations that hate Biden's new taxes on the wealthy and stepped up IRS enforcement on rich tax-cheats.

Will they win? It's hard to say. Despite what you may have heard, the case against the FTC order is very weak, as Matt Stoller explains here:

https://www.thebignewsletter.com/p/ftc-enrages-corporate-america-by

The FTC's statutory authority to block noncompetes comes from Section 5 of the FTC Act, which bans "unfair methods of competition" (hard to imagine a less fair method than indenturing your workers). Section 6(g) of the Act lets the FTC make rules to enforce Section 5's ban on unfairness. Both are good law – 6(g) has been used many times (26 times in the five years from 1968-73 alone!).

The DC Circuit court upheld the FTC's right to "promulgate rules defining the meaning of the statutory standards of the illegality the Commission is empowered to prevent" in 1973, and in 1974, Congress changed the FTC Act, but left this rulemaking power intact.

The lawyer suing the FTC – Anton Scalia's larvum, a pismire named Eugene Scalia – has some wild theories as to why none of this matters. He says that because the law hasn't been enforced since the ancient days of the (checks notes) 1970s, it no longer applies. He says that the mountain of precedent supporting the FTC's authority "hasn't aged well." He says that other antitrust statutes don't work the same as the FTC Act. Finally, he says that this rule is a big economic move and that it should be up to Congress to make it.

Stoller makes short work of these arguments. The thing that tells you whether a law is good is its text and precedent, "not whether a lawyer thinks a precedent is old and bad." Likewise, the fact that other antitrust laws is irrelevant "because, well, they are other antitrust laws, not this antitrust law." And as to whether this is Congress's job because it's economically significant, "so what?" Congress gave the FTC this power.

Now, none of this matters if the Supreme Court strikes down the rule, and what's more, if they do, they might also neuter the FTC's rulemaking power in the bargain. But again: so what? How is it better for the FTC to do nothing, and preserve a power that it never uses, than it is for the Commission to free the 35-40 million American workers whose bosses get to use the US court system to force them to do a job they hate?

The FTC's rule doesn't just ban noncompetes – it also bans TRAPs ("training repayment agreement provisions"), which require employees to pay their bosses thousands of dollars if they quit, get laid off, or are fired:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/08/04/its-a-trap/#a-little-on-the-nose

The FTC's job is to protect Americans from businesses that cheat. This is them, doing their job. If the Supreme Court strikes this down, it further delegitimizes the court, and spells out exactly who the GOP works for.

This is part of the long history of antitrust and labor. From its earliest days, antitrust law was "aimed at dollars, not men" – in other words, antitrust law was always designed to smash corporate power in order to protect workers. But over and over again, the courts refused to believe that Congress truly wanted American workers to get legal protection from the wealthy predators who had fastened their mouth-parts on those workers' throats. So over and over – and over and over – Congress passed new antitrust laws that clarified the purpose of antitrust, using words so small that even federal judges could understand them:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/04/14/aiming-at-dollars/#not-men

After decades of comatose inaction, Biden's FTC has restored its role as a protector of labor, explicitly tackling competition through a worker protection lens. This week, the Commission blocked the merger of Capri Holdings and Tapestry Inc, a pair of giant conglomerates that have, between them, bought up nearly every "affordable luxury" brand (Versace, Jimmy Choo, Michael Kors, Kate Spade, Coach, Stuart Weitzman, etc).

You may not care about "affordable luxury" handbags, but you should care about the basis on which the FTC blocked this merger. As David Dayen explains for The American Prospect: 33,000 workers employed by these two companies would lose the wage-competition that drives them to pay skilled sales-clerks more to cross the mall floor and switch stores:

https://prospect.org/economy/2024-04-24-challenge-fashion-merger-new-antitrust-philosophy/

In other words, the FTC is blocking a $8.5b merger that would turn an oligopoly into a monopoly explicitly to protect workers from the power of bosses to suppress their wages. What's more, the vote was unanimous, include the Commission's freshly appointed (and frankly, pretty terrible) Republican commissioners:

https://www.ftc.gov/news-events/news/press-releases/2024/04/ftc-moves-block-tapestrys-acquisition-capri

A lot of people are (understandably) worried that if Biden doesn't survive the coming election that the raft of excellent rules enacted by his agencies will die along with his presidency. Here we have evidence that the Biden administration's anti-corporate agenda has become institutionalized, acquiring a bipartisan durability.

And while there hasn't been a lot of press about that anti-corporate agenda, it's pretty goddamned huge. Back in 2021, Tim Wu (then working in the White wrote an executive order on competition that identified 72 actions the agencies could take to blunt the power of corporations to harm everyday Americans:

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2021/08/party-its-1979-og-antitrust-back-baby

Biden's agency heads took that plan and ran with it, demonstrating the revolutionary power of technical administrative competence and proving that being good at your job is praxis:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/10/18/administrative-competence/#i-know-stuff

In just the past week, there's been a storm of astoundingly good new rules finalized by the agencies:

A minimum staffing ratio for nursing homes;

The founding of the American Climate Corps;

A guarantee of overtime benefits;

A ban on financial advisors cheating retirement savers;

Medical privacy rules that protect out-of-state abortions;

A ban on junk fees in mortgage servicing;

Conservation for 13m Arctic acres in Alaska;

Classifying "forever chemicals" as hazardous substances;

A requirement for federal agencies to buy sustainable products;

Closing the gun-show loophole.

That's just a partial list, and it's only Thursday.

Why the rush? As Gerard Edic writes for The American Prospect, finalizing these rules now protects them from the Congressional Review Act, a gimmick created by Newt Gingrich in 1996 that lets the next Senate wipe out administrative rules created in the months before a federal election:

https://prospect.org/politics/2024-04-23-biden-administration-regulations-congressional-review-act/

In other words, this is more dazzling administrative competence from the technically brilliant agencies that have labored quietly and effectively since 2020. Even laggards like Pete Buttigieg have gotten in on the act, despite a very poor showing in the early years of the Biden administration:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/02/11/dinah-wont-you-blow/#ecp

Despite those unpromising beginnings, the DOT has gotten onboard the trains it regulates, and passed a great rule that forces airlines to refund your money if they charge you for services they don't deliver:

https://www.whitehouse.gov/briefing-room/statements-releases/2024/04/24/fact-sheet-biden-harris-administration-announces-rules-to-deliver-automatic-refunds-and-protect-consumers-from-surprise-junk-fees-in-air-travel/

The rule also bans junk fees and forces airlines to compensate you for late flights, finally giving American travelers the same rights their European cousins have enjoyed for two decades.

It's the latest in a string of muscular actions taken by the DOT, a period that coincides with the transfer of Jen Howard from her role as chief of staff to FTC chair Lina Khan to a new gig as the DOT's chief of competition enforcement:

https://prospect.org/infrastructure/transportation/2024-04-25-transportation-departments-new-path/

Under Howard's stewardship, the DOT blocked the merger of Spirit and Jetblue, and presided over the lowest flight cancellation rate in more than decade:

https://www.transportation.gov/briefing-room/2023-numbers-more-flights-fewer-cancellations-more-consumer-protections

All that, along with a suite of protections for fliers, mark a huge turning point in the US aviation industry's long and worsening abusive relationship with the American public. There's more in the offing, too including a ban on charging families extra for adjacent seats, rules to make flying with wheelchairs easier, and a ban on airlines selling passenger's private information to data brokers.

There's plenty going on in the world – and in the Biden administration – that you have every right to be furious and/or depressed about. But these expert agencies, staffed by experts, have brought on a tsunami of rules that will make every working American better off in a myriad of ways. Those material improvements in our lives will, in turn, free us up to fight the bigger, existential fights for a livable planet, free from genocide.

It may not be a good time to be alive, but it's a much better time than it was just last week.

And it's only Thursday.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/04/25/capri-v-tapestry/#aiming-at-dollars-not-men

[heavencanbeaprisontoo]

Living with Alfie Solomons

Warnings: Fluff, angst, references to religion and violence.

Domestic Alfie Headcanons

Alfie owns many different properties all over London and Margate. To your shock, only two were in Camden. One was what you could only describe as a “bachelor’s apartment,” which strongly resembled his office with the addition of a lumpy mattress. He took you to see what he considers his “home,” a one-story brick house surrounded by the lush green of the English countryside. Alfie had built this home after deciding, “Me and stairs, right, we ain’t made for each other.” The home also comes with a sweet little guesthouse behind it for his mother to live in. At which point he had a short rant about how his aging mother refuses to move in and still lives in her tiny flat in Camden. 

When he’s not being a “baker,” he does like to do some baking. Real baking. Bread, pudding, cake, pies, you name it. He likes having to measure his ingredients, put on the perfect temperature for the perfect amount of time. He likes to collect cookbooks too, and will have a gleam of almost childlike delight when he finds one he doesn’t already possess. 

Alfie has a tendency to develop very strong interest in a very specific thing and then drop it months later. He retains all he’s learned from it, but it can be a bit annoying as he will fill the house with his latest obsession. A short list of obsessions he’s developed are: American cowboys, jewelry making, stamps, coin collecting, eastern meditation practices, and Italian opera. 

You had to get used to his slight OCD involving things in his home. Everything has a place, and he gets very grumpy if you move something, a spoon for instance, and he can’t immediately find it. 

Children in the neighborhood are equal parts frightened and delighted by Alfie. They think he’s funny but intimidating. He gives out money and gifts to the Jewish families of Camden, and the children know that. Your dear man will huff and puff about the kids bothering him… but also throw them a coin or a sweet when he’s in the mood. Alfie is sort of like Santa Claus and the Boogeyman at the same time to them. After you started living with him, these children started to follow you around the neighborhood to ask questions about him. Some are quite tame, like “Does Mr. Solomons like cake?” or “Is Mr. Solomons your husband? Will you have lots of children?” while others are, “Did Mr. Solomons kidnap you?”

Relationship Headcanons

Mr. Solomons is quiet in his moments of romance with you. He likes to cup your cheek in his palm and touch his forehead to yours. Trace your face with his thumb as if to memorize it by touch. He places slow kisses on your cheeks and lips, gentle and almost reverent. His world is very brutal and without loyalty, you become his sanctuary. He sleeps best with you in his arms or laying directly on top of him. If you need to get up for any reason, expect a lot of complaining in at least three different languages from Alfie. He hates to be left alone in bed now that he’s had you. 

Thomas Shelby had no idea Alfie was married, until Alfie felt like telling him. Tommy now knows far too much about you. And you know far too much about Thomas Shelby. The first time you meet in person is very awkward.

Alfie is the sort of person that likes quality time and good conversation. He likes to go on strolls with you on the beach of Margate when his knee isn’t too painful. Going to the museum or a library are all tip-top dates in Alfie’s opinion. However, his favorite place to take you is back home. Home is where he can make you dinner and listen to you laugh at his strange stories. He loves to banter and bicker with you. You are one of the few people to make him laugh. Everyone at the port knows when Alfie’s had a nice evening with you because he comes to work in such a grand mood. Newer employees have to be warned not to get too comfortable, as he could come in like a bull if you argued that morning. 

He has a bad habit of dropping surprises on you. These surprises normally revolve around security and protection. Alfie will buy or arrange things for you and then completely forget he did it until you storm into his office asking for an explanation. For some reason, this man won’t admit these things are for self-defense. He just acts like it’s perfectly normal to take your lover out to a gun range or teach her how to stab a man between the ribs. He’s just being a fun, quirky man! 

A marriage proposal is never far off, he’s just waiting for you to convert. If you do not want to convert, prepare to be a secret. He is a religious man and he treasures his faith. Alfie will never forsake you (though he may jest) for not believing what he believes. His reason for hiding you is simple, his mother. Mrs. Solomons wouldn’t speak to her son if she found out he was living with an unwed gentile! 

That said, Mrs. Solomons adores you before and after you marry her son. She’s a delightful old Russian woman who is constantly ordering Alfie around. Mainly, she tells him he glares too much, and he needs to give her a grandchild soon. 

You were surprised by how touchy he is behind closed doors. In public, you could pass for an employee with how distant he is before marriage. After marriage, he likes to walk with arms linked. As a married couple, it is more appropriate to be seen touching each other and he takes full advantage of it. As a matter of fact, he’s almost clingy. He’ll call the house from his office and make up an excuse to talk to you. 

[daisynik7]

Résumé

Pairing: Eren x f!reader

Rating: Explicit - MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

Word Count: ~2.7k

cw: porn without plot, implications of cheating, office sex, boss x employee power dynamic, potentially corrupt business practices, sexually explicit content/smut – PIV sex (doggy, cowgirl), cunnilingus, fingering, sex without a condom, dirty talk, degrading language, lingerie

Summary: Today is your anniversary and unfortunately, your husband forgot. Luckily, there’s a potential new hire you’re interviewing who will surely appreciate the special lingerie you’re wearing. Author’s Notes: This is partially inspired by this incredible soundgasm I listened to (listener discretion is advised, put your headphones on before you listen!), but I changed up a few details. Reblogs and/or comments are ALWAYS appreciated! Hearing directly from you is highly encouraging and keeps me motivated to keep writing! Thank you for reading! Divider created by @/saradika!

There’s a knock on your door. You sit at the desk in your office, glancing at the bottom left corner of the computer screen, checking the time: 12:05 PM. He’s late. The potential new hire you’re interviewing today was supposed to arrive by noon. If you weren’t already in a bad mood, you’d dismiss it. 

Today is your wedding anniversary. Half the day has passed, and your husband still has not mentioned anything about it. At this rate, you’d bet money that he forgot. He’s messaging you like normal, no indication that he remembers this special occasion. You could be the bigger person and gently remind him. In his defense, he’s been stressed at his job, and sure, it’s easy for things to slip in his jumbled mind. But your wedding anniversary? How could he forget that? 

A second knock comes. You refocus your attention to work, burying your marital dilemma in the back of your mind. “Come in,” you respond, patting flat any wrinkles on your blouse.

In comes a handsome man, brunette hair tied into a fashionably messy bun, outfitted in a dark suit and tie, a light pink dress shirt underneath. He flashes you a smile, still holding the handle, closing the door. “Sorry I’m late. No one was out there to assist me, so I got a little lost finding your office.”

You clear your throat, shuffling the stack of papers in front of you, momentarily taken aback by his striking appearance. “I sent everyone to lunch, so it’s just you and me in here.”

“I see.” The grin remains on his face as he reaches into his backpack, passing you a sheet of paper. “Here’s my résumé.” He takes a seat in the sofa chair facing you, setting his bag on the floor next to him. 

You scan the document quickly, starting from the top, reading aloud the first couple of lines. Your mind keeps wandering to your husband, so you fail to retain any of the information shared on that piece of paper. At the end, you sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose.

“Are you alright?” he asks, leaning forward in his seat.

“I’m just…I’m a little distracted right now. My mind is all over the place and I didn’t prepare for this interview. I’m so sorry.”

“That’s okay. We all have stuff we’re dealing with. Do you want to talk about it?” He looks at you with concern in his eyes. More emotion than what your husband has given you all day. At least this guy sees you. 

You lay his résumé to the side, setting your palms flat on the surface. “Well, I’m not sure how appropriate it is for me to tell you this.”

He smirks. “Hey, I won’t say a word. Everything said in here is between you and me…boss.” 

You raise a brow at him. “Promise to keep it a secret?” He nods, miming a key locking his mouth shut and tossing it over his shoulder. 

“Well, my no-good husband forgot that today is our anniversary.”

His eyes widen, surprised. “Wow. Really?”

“Yup.”

Scoffing, he replies, “What an asshole. How could he forget that?”

“You tell me.” You relax into the seat, feeling more at ease with him listening to you with intrigue. “You want to know what the worst part is?”

“Tell me.”

“I’m wearing something special for him right now, and I won’t even be able to show it off.”

The bump in his throat bobs, swallowing hard. “Something special?”

“Mm-hm,” you hum, propping your elbow on the desk, knuckles tucked under your chin. “How awful, right?”

He sinks back into the chair, crossing his ankle over his knee. You do your best not to glance at his crotch, prominently displayed in this position. “Very. That prick doesn’t deserve to see you in that.”

You gaze at each other, the sexual tension thick and heavy in the air. Before you get carried away, you snap out of it and retrieve his résumé, clearing your throat. “Anyways, you’re definitely qualified for the job, based on your skills and previous experience.”

“That’s nice to hear.”

“Are there any other skills you have that you didn’t include here?”

He smirks. “I have quite a few, but it wouldn’t be appropriate to list them on a formal document.”

“Oh?” You eye him curiously. “Can you tell me one of them?”

He thinks for a couple of seconds, choosing his words carefully. “I’m really good at appreciating people.”

This catches you off guard. You weren’t expecting an answer like this. “Appreciating…? Can you elaborate?”

He strokes his chin, contemplating before explaining, “Well, for example, I know that I can truly appreciate that special something you’re wearing. More than your lousy husband can.” There’s a wicked smirk forming at his lips. 

You give him a small laugh, amused by his response. “Oh yeah?”

He shifts in his seat, biting his lower lip, nodding. “If I was your husband, I’d fucking worship you.”

You squeeze your thighs together, pussy throbbing between your legs, aroused. Heat rushes into your cheeks, flustered by this sudden turn of events. This is bad. Very, very bad. You’re married and today is your anniversary, the last thing you should ever do is cheat on your husband with this random stranger. Especially one that you’re interviewing to hire. You’re better than this. 

On the other hand, he hasn’t bothered to call you today to wish you a happy anniversary. Based on this, it doesn’t seem like he cares about the sanctity of marriage, so why should you? You have this man before you, actually willing to appreciate you. And, with the office empty, who would know if you stepped into the dark side just this once?

With your decision made, you stand up, stepping towards him, leaning against the front of your desk. He watches you attentively, waiting in anticipation for you to make the first move. You start to undo the top button of your blouse, asking, “Do you really think you can keep this a secret, Eren?”

The sound of his name on your sultry lips has his cock twitching beneath his slacks, aching to be touched. “I definitely can,” he answers, gulping down the spit collecting in his salivating mouth.

You slide your skirt down, slowly revealing your sheer thong, outlined in black lace, embroidered with a delicate floral pattern across the mesh fabric. His eyes are carnal at the sight, watching your little strip tease intently. Twirling to reveal the backside, you turn your head to see his reaction. He bites his fist, gaze focused on your bare ass, the string of lingerie nestled between your cheeks.

He curses under his breath, running his fingers through his hair, nervous and excited. “You’ve been wearing this all day?”

You unbutton the rest of your top, matching bra gradually coming into view. ��All day long. It was supposed to be a surprise for my husband, but I guess it’ll be a special treat for you instead.”

“Lucky me.” He licks his lips when you shrug your top off, lingerie on full display now. His expression is hazy with lust, eyeing you up and down repeatedly, letting this image of you sink into his brain, cock strained inside his pants, desperate for release. He can’t take it anymore; he needs you. 

“Sit there and spread your legs for me,” he demands, getting up from his chair to tower over you. Following his command, you hop on, ass pressed to the smooth laminate, thighs splayed for him. “I’m going to give you what you deserve.”

He bends down, grazing his lips on the embroidered flowers. Chuckling, he tips his chin up to peer at you. “You’re such a fucking slut, wearing this to the office. What would your employees say if they find out about this?”

You smirk at him, tugging his hair with your fist, shoving him closer to your pussy. “They won’t. This is our little secret, remember?”

His laughter vibrates against you as he sucks on your clit through your panties, the fabric thin enough to feel him on you. “Whatever you say, boss.” He laps at your bud until your underwear is wet with his drool, shiny with your cum. With his thumb, he teases your entrance, slipping past the thin string of your thong. 

“Fuck, Eren,” you swear, throwing your head back. 

“I love it when you say my name,” he muffles, fingers now gripping your panties to the side, eating you out sloppily. He pulls off to dribble his thick saliva on you, latching on again to smear it on your clit. His thumb is pressed to your entrance, prodding into your slippery cunt ever-so-slightly. You climax, his lips puckered tight on your puffy bud, suckling relentlessly until his thumb is coated in your cum. 

“Look at this creamy pussy. All for me.” He runs his tongue along your sticky mess, collecting it in his mouth to swallow. You lower your legs, draping them over the edge of the table, weak and unsteady from the intense orgasm. He straightens up to kiss you, lips glossy with your cum. After a few more clumsy kisses, he peels off your lingerie, rolling it over your skin until it’s coiled in on itself down at your ankles, bunching it in his fist. “These are all ruined now. Your husband will never see these. It’s for me and only me.” He places it in his pocket, then sits on the sofa chair, patting his thighs, beckoning you to sit. Before you do, he quickly unbuckles his belt and unzips, letting his pants drop around his ankles as he whips his hard dick out.

You step towards him, straddling his lap, nodding, “Only for you.”

He cups your cheek, thumb gently brushing your skin. “Forget about him. Focus on me. It’s our day now, isn’t it?”

The low growl in his voice has you mesmerized. “Yes. Oh god, yes.” It’s all so wrong, but in this moment, you don’t care. All you can think about is being bounced on his cock, milking him until you’re stuffed full of his load. So much that it spills and stains the cushions, a constant reminder of the obscenities that are about to occur in this office.

“You’re so fucking wet for me,” he says, glancing at your arousal. “Bet your husband never ate you out like that. Has he ever fucked you in this office before?”

Desperate to feel more of him, you grind your hips, eagerly watching his pretty cock ooze with precum from the tip. “Never.” You reach behind you to unclasp your bra, revealing your breasts to him. 

“Fuck, so I’m really the first to christen it. Already putting me to work, huh?” Fingers wrapped around his shaft, he taps the head of his cock on your clit, laughing when you whine from the contact. He rubs it across your swollen bud, his other hand fondling your tits, thumb caressing your peaked nipples. 

“Oh fuck,” you groan, gripping his shoulders to lift yourself onto him. “I want it, Eren. Give it to me.”

“So eager, can’t even wait,” he grunts, lowering you onto him, cursing when your pussy squeezes his length. “Fuck.”

You ride him slowly, his hands grasping your waist, guiding you lazily while you do most of the work. He fits perfectly inside your wet cunt, gliding in smoothly with each bounce, hitting your sweet spot deeper and deeper. Your tongue hangs out of your mouth, drool leaking from the corners of your lips, fucked-out and in total bliss.

“My new boss is being such a slut for me. Is this what you expect when you hire me? For me to fuck you stupid every day until you’re leaking from all your holes? You’d like that, wouldn’t you?” He skims your lips with his thumb, wiping away your spit. 

“Fuck, Eren! Yes, I want that!” you cry out, the chair creaking beneath you as you spring up and down. 

“I bet your husband doesn’t know how much of a fucking whore you are. You nasty slut.” He pulls you closer to him, mouth hot on your ear. “He doesn’t deserve you. Doesn’t deserve this gorgeous fucking pussy.” He holds you snug, thrusting his hips up in tandem with you. You come like this, cradled in his arms, coating his cock in your slick. You catch your breath, relaxing on top of him. 

Nuzzling his nose on your cheek, he asks, “Are you okay?”

You smile, giggling softly. “Yeah.”

“Good. Because I’m not done with you yet.”

Soon, you’re bent over your desk, being pounded by him from behind. His and your moans echoing off the walls of your office, along with the wet slaps of his pelvis smacking your ass. “Fuck! Right there!”

“You’re so fucking bad, cheating on your husband with me. Letting me fuck this unfaithful pussy,” he growls, slamming his hips against you. “If he were me, I’d fuck you so good you wouldn’t even think about anyone else. Make it so that you’re addicted to this cock. Can’t go a single day without it balls deep inside you.”

He continues to spit filth at you, firing backshot after backshot until you orgasm again, this time with him, spilling every last drop of his load inside you. He slowly pulls out, moaning when he sees his warm cum gush from your slit. “God, that was amazing,” he says, grabbing the tissue box next to your computer, wiping the mess dripping down your legs. 

You’re too exhausted to respond coherently, crumpled on the desk, listening to him pick up all the discarded clothing scattered on the carpet. When he’s done changing into his professional attire, he slides his hands around your waist, carefully hoisting you up into a standing position with him behind you. “You okay, sweetie?”

You crane your neck to kiss him, smiling. “Mm-hm.”

He offers to put on your clothes, first the bra, then the blouse, one sleeve at a time. Squatting down to help you step into your skirt, he slaps your ass playfully. You have no choice but to go commando, your ruined panties still in his pocket. The two of you look at each other, giggling at your glazed expressions from the aftermath of sex. You reach towards him, fixing his collar. He flips his wrist, checking the time on his watch. “I should probably head out now. It’ll take me a while to get to the other side of the building.”

“Yeah, and you know how Levi gets.” You wrap your arms around your husband’s shoulders, giving him a smooch on the cheek. “You’ll never hear the end of it if you’re late for the interview.”

“I’ll blame you then,” he smirks. “Besides, I’m a shoo-in.”

“Don’t be so cocky! Levi isn’t going to hire you just because you’re friends.”

“But you’d hire me, right?”

“Absolutely not. You’re a fucking menace.” And you mean this whole-heartedly. After all, this was his idea. Once he found out that he got a job interview at your company, under a separate department run by your mutual friend, he came up with this fantasy of you, his sexy boss wife, being fucked by him, the potential new hire, during the interview. And when it just so happened to be scheduled on the day of your wedding anniversary, he couldn’t help himself, adding the element of cheating into his twisted, dark role-play of his. You give yourself some credit, though: The lingerie really was a special surprise for him, which worked exactly the way you wanted it to.

He feigns a shocked expression. “I can’t believe my own wife wouldn’t hire me! How rude!” He pulls you into a hug, kissing you along your neck. “Maybe you need another good fuck to change your mind.”

You laugh, shoving him off. “Get out of here! Seriously, you’re going to be late.”

“Okay, okay. I’m leaving. I’ll call you when it’s done,” he says, kissing you on the forehead. “And don’t forget we have reservations at six tonight.” 

“I remember. I love you! Good luck,” you tell him, tucking a stray strand of hair behind his ear.

He gazes at you, smiling. “I love you, too. And happy anniversary.”

[pangolin-404]

non-exhaustive list of masked headcanons:

A group of Masked is called a "masquerade".

The process of possession kills the host, and the mask immediately begins to take root in the host's skull and eat away at the body. It can take weeks for the mask's root system to fully take hold, and a healthy root system allows for finer control of the host body, slowed rates of decomposition, and better long-term nutrient intake.

A Masked is not its host, despite Masked appearing to retain some of the host's instinct and reflex. Very fresh Masked may respond to their host's name, become extremely distressed when fled or fought, or attempt to vocalize spoken language, but they are still an active threat. They are not your friend.

In the immediate aftermath of converting an employee to a fellow Masked while more are in the immediate vicinity, both individuals will be distracted (when unprovoked) for up to one minute before resuming a hunt. Use this time wisely.

To a Masked, its blood is its sole defense, chemically altered to boil under excitement or duress.

Bracken mistakenly hunt Masked, but abandon them once realizing what they are, as Brackens only feed on fresh meat. The Masked will expend energy mending the damaged nerves, un-snap its neck, and get up just fine eventually.

When outdoors, Forest Keepers are the top predator of Masked, because Masked are bad at registering things as threats.

Snare fleas are an exception, as potential damage to the mask will make the Masked break into a panicked state of running aimlessly, vocalizing, and regurgitation until the flea inevitably dies.

Jesters will follow Masked around, and rarely wind. If a Jester starts winding, it will eventually stop without popping.

Thumpers will attack Masked, and will eat the mask.

Masked occasionally pick up and hold scrap. Some still carry a long-dead flashlight or walkie-talkie.

They have excellent night vision.

Masked appear to have an appreciation for music. Attempts at dancing around winding Jesters have been observed.

Masked are known to sleep standing up. They alternate between sleeping and standing stationary to reserve energy and make potentially nearby employees approach. Company employees are advised to assume any standing Masked is an awake and hunting Masked.

Masked that are more decomposed will sit to rest and sleep more, but struggle getting up again.

Masked are more docile in groups, and will go out searching for employees far less when they already have company. Most masquerades are three to five Masked strong, but the largest infestation recorded had over two dozen members.

Masked are very affectionate with one another and will often vocalize together, hug, hold hands, and "kiss" (clacking their masks together) for enjoyment. A fight between Masked has never been recorded.

If a Masked is injured, its masquerade will take care of it and defend it. If the host is unsalvageable, the mask is either abandoned or carried for a small period of time before being apparently forgotten. In larger masquerades, a mask with a dead host is more quickly abandoned than in smaller masquerades.

It is unclear if a Masked recognizes a host-less mask as one of its own.

It is unclear if masquerading behavior affects a Masked's sense of individuality.

Masked in masquerades will mimic each other's behavior until they act in unison. The Company is unsure if they form true hiveminds.

Tragedy Masked exist, though are rare. It is unclear why Masked have this apparently random variation. They behave the same as the more common comedy Masked, but cry instead of laugh. Some comedy Masked appear distressed when recent tragedy additions to the masquerade cry and smother it in affection until an understanding is reached.

Tragedy Masked will pretend to be an employee in distress, crying to lure employees in. If part of a masquerade, the other Masked will hide and strike when any prey comes too close.

Sometimes this backfires when pretending to be injured or frightened distresses the Masked around it, which come out of hiding to comfort the tragedy, much to its confusion.

Tragedies cannot laugh, and comedies cannot cry. However, all Masked can perform other vocalizations, such as hissing and growling when attacked.

The common observance of the mask rattling on the host's head is believed to be out of excitement, and is only seen when actively hunting or when around other Masked.

Masked require very little to sustain themselves, but it is believed they are opportunistic hyper-carnivores who occasionally hunt hoarding bugs, snare fleas, or hatchling thumpers to supplement the nutrients leeched from the host body. Masked readily share kills with any Masked nearby, but do not tend to hunt in parties larger than two or three.

Due to the state of the host's face and jaw post-possession, Masked cannot chew. To eat, they regurgitate activated (boiling) blood onto a desired food and drink the resulting slurry.

It is unknown where Masked originated. It is under heavy debate whether they have crustacean ancestry or are highly specialized fungi. Rumors that they are artificial life created for war are, in fact, just rumors.

When a Masked's host rots away until it cannot move, the mask will enter a dormant state. Eventually, the host body is picked apart by scavengers such as baboon hawks, hoarding bugs, and snare fleas. The mask, inedible to most, is typically discarded or added to a hoarding bug nest.

While environmental conditions adjust its durability, a Masked host is usable for four to five months on average. Heat, injury, repeated hunts (exerted energy) regardless of success or failure, and anemia drastically shorten a host's usability. The mask itself, if not shattered or eaten, is functionally immortal.

[spdrvyn]

mr. spider and his journalist

you and miguel are rivals on the surface, but there's an irrevocable bond that exists between the two of you when you read between the lines.

injuries. implied wound patching. fluff. hurt/comfort. suggestive. happy valentines, folks!

The fast-paced and riveting action, joint with the simple adrenaline of describing an intense scene was what drew you to this job in the first place. Journaling wasn't easy, while you were no superhero, you were still somewhat putting your safety on the line to witness two adults in skin tight suits and superpowers throw hands at each other.

In spite of everything, you loved your job.

Your name had reached every single article that average Nueva York citizen could even think to get their hands on, your name befell the mouth of every employee in your building whether it was in praise or malice. You didn't care, all that mattered to you was that you were truly out there.

Although, your workplace wasn't the only area of your life where you were severely disliked. Even as you went out and about to record and detail on the spectacles and heroic gestures in this city, its top vigilante still glared at you with ire through his mask.

He was a spider, you were a pest.

Spider-Man had fought many impeccable foes over the years, battled by a villainous organization that was out for his blood in an almost literal sense. Not to mention that he was hurtling fate's delegated task of protecting a multiverse which each had a different version of this maddening, web-weaving hero.

It wasn't like he could bring himself to actually express his distaste towards you, but it was hard to mask his annoyance when you immediately came flocking to him with borderline intrusive questions about his life outside of his work.

After the precipice of disaster subsided once each fight had concluded, the snippiness of your tone as you wrung out questions brought the crowd of clamoring reporters to a halt.

Miguel had to swallow his intrigue time and time again, he'd tried to acknowledge a long time ago that surely you were just another journalist seeking out to actually making something of yourself. But your passion was the flint that sparked his curiosity about you, it was a weakness. He couldn't allow his poise to be wavered by someone like you.

Someone so eloquent and composed, someone so witty and humorous, letting himself get bested by you would be the biggest blow to his massive ego. It would be nightmarish to even approximate the possibility of Miguel having some sort of interest towards you.

You'd already come to your senses a long time ago.

It was silly, really. Obviously you'd discover these underlying feelings for him, why else would you practically be clinging to his side post-mission? Why else would you publish so many stories and reports about his daily miscreancy? A 5th grader could figure it out.

There was so much you knew, that you really shouldn't have. There were details about his life that have retained in your mind, but you didn't even know his full name.

"No further anomalies, Miguel. I'd suggest checking diagnostics though, anomaly activity in this dimension has been active as of late."

Miguel groans, running a hand across his face despite his mask. "Uh huh, right." He doesn't need anymore on his plate right now, for all he could care, you were probably hiding around in a little corner somewhere.

"So it's Miguel?"

Fuck, he really hated being right. And not having a spider sense, that too. "Ay, mierda!" He jolted, you bit on your lip to conceal your giggles. Seeing someone as big as Miguel get startled out of his mind was a little funny. "Do not keep that detail in your little article."

"What kind of person do you think I am, Miguel?" Ugh, he hated the way you say his name even more. "Tu secreto es mi secreto, no need to worry about it. But if I could get a last name too, that would be-"

"Alright, get away from me."

He still remembered the way you chased after him as he approached the edge of the battered rooftop, clutching at his forearm. You'd pester him for details, the most intricate ones, even when he knew that he could just zip right out of there, you always found a way to make him stay. Every single time.

The stirring way that you were always able to show up after nearly every mission he's had, your very presence emanating even when deep into the crowds of people surrounding the scene.

But you didn't show up this time.

Don't call for backup, he'd insisted. A stupid, moronic decision that was because now he was crawling his way, bloody and bruised, throughout a sopping wet alleyway that definitely wasn't only soaking with just the rainwater.

There was no crowd this time, there was no you to be found. He would have noticed a hundred miles away otherwise, his watch had damaged in the aftermath. Narrowly escaping by a hair, he growled frustratedly as the furious taps of his fingers against the small screen didn't register. His talons took the rear, scratching against the tiny panes of glass and only breaking it further.

At that point, there was no more reason to be angry. What's done is done, he fought his battle, he didn't lose, but he wouldn't consider this a win either.

The nano-fabric, originally designed to be as comfortable as can be for your regular vigilante activities, now felt like it clung uncomfortable to Miguel's skin. Sticky, grimy, and bloody. His chest heaved with the effort to just keep breathing, his large frame now so small as he slumped against the rough wall of the alley.

He wondered what you'd say right now, if he hadn't been caught in this blunder. You'd be asking him, what the anomaly looked like, if they were from a different era, their powers, how did he defeat them? So on and so forth, but your absence was more than enough of a bad omen for his failure.

The sound of your voice wasn't something he thought he'd miss, your annoying comments, your inquisitive glances, that sparkle in your eyes whenever he started talking. All those lovely details he'd lost to snide replies and swift conversation enders, he closed his eyes, it was childish to hold onto hope, but maybe thinking about what you'd say, what you'd do, would motivate him to get up. Get away.

Miguel, I honestly just don't know you do it, you would say with a sarcastic rise in your tone.

Say, how does your suit even work? I mean, I know it's nano-tech, but I'm no scientist of any sort. You'd ask, all while poking and prodding at the technology. A privilege he only allows you to have.

I don't know what to do with you, how am I supposed to help when this thing doesn't even have a damn zipper! The frustrated grind in your voice says it all.

Don't die on me, please. I'm sorry if I'm a thorn in your side, okay? I'll stop, just wake up! Wake up, please. You begged, a desperation sewn deeply with the way you grasped at his bandaged hand.

When did he get here?

His body still hurt like hell, trying to get his neck up straight was like having needles straight into the muscles. His eyes fluttered open, and the first thing he sees is your eyes. Puffy, swollen, and red from crying, your mouth stuck in a pout, quivering from the amount of sobs that you've let out. Your grip on his hand loosens upon his awakening, you can't hug him without risk of hurting him, so you simply lean in closer.

"You're alive," it's said a lot calmer than the hysterics you were spewing a while ago, a relieved smile gracing your features. "I- I didn't kill you, you're alive!"

The joy rushes into your voice, you're practically vibrating with happiness while trying to fight back the urge to swoop him in your arms. Miguel would, but for obvious reasons, he won't.

"Why would you have killed me?"

"I'm not a science person, how many times do I have to tell you?"

He doesn't bother quipping back, he hums, looking down over at the exposed parts of suits, pushing the blanket you set on him aside to discover that everything was cleaned and patched and stitchedto near perfection. "So you're not a nurse or a science person, but you can fix wounds like no other."

"This is a common book trope, considering how I'm closely tied to a superhero, I feel like being a fixer-upper is a requirement."

"Closely tied?" He says, unamused.

"We'll have to be now! I can't have you scare me like that, I won't ask you any questions for a month as long as I don't see you in any dark alleys all hurt looking." You harumph, you see him press a spot below his ear and all of a sudden-

His mask disengages, fabric disappearing seamlessly as his face is miraculously bestowed onto your gaze. Warm skin from the ambient lighting set to accomodate his hypersensitive senses. Curly and deep brown hair, all mussed from his scuffle. A set of dark crimson eyes that look a beautiful chestnut if you really look from a different angle, you forget to breathe.

"Thank you, but don't get too excited. Consider this a treat for taking care of me," he returns to that sense of stoicism, but your jaw is unfortunately still agape from how awe inspiring he truly is. Now, you'd have to imagine this face every time you even so much as wrote the word spider down.

"I, uh, yeah. Sure,"

This is the first instance he's ever had you so silent. You trekked around your flat for different foods you could feed him, brewing him too many cups of tea to count. You barely even made small talk, it was astounding to him.

He left soon after, the super healing abilities work bound to have started working more efficiently anyway. You bid your goodbyes to him, it was as if you still had the moment of shock written all over your face when he revealed his face to you.

The days that followed were odd, he didn't find himself in any sort of kerfuffle that involved him to be severely injured anymore, but when he noticed you in the crowd, you tended to shy away. You didn't even try to follow him afterward to pester him for details on the battle, there was something so off about it.

So Miguel decides to talk to you about it.

You were idly typing away, contained in a small office from the rest of the room. The chatter from your coworkers were your white noise along with the near silent clicks of your keyboard, the process has you so out of it that you don't pick up on the reflection of navy blue and bright red on your computer screen.

"You," grumbles Miguel and this time, you're started.

"Oh, shock. What are you doing here?" That boisterous confidence you always carried with you had gone mute, all Miguel saw was a drained creative and it made his blood boil.

"Why haven't you been," he doesn't want to say it. Don't make him say it. "Talking to me?"

You tilt your head to the side in confusion, quirking your brow up. Miguel disengages his mask again, you'll never get used to that. "I- what do you mean by that exactly?"

"You know, don't you normally- ask more questions? After I take care of business?" Miguel despises how needy he sounds right now. Please talk to me and keep annoying me, for I miss it so dearly.

"I thought you hated that," your voice drops in volume. "I just thought since the thing that happened that you'd want me to leave you alone for a while."

The absurdity of your statement had him reeling, the reason why he didn't die that night was because of your allergy to negligence, how the thought of even leaving him alone would make you sick to your stomach as you so described. Now, you were giving him distance?

"No," he walked even closer to you, cornering you against your desk and causing you to shrink in your small swivel chair. "You don't get it, do you?"

You shake your head hesitantly, it's too hard to focus. You've touched him before, but never has he actually initiated it. He was mere inches away from you, whether you should focus on not looking like a freshly plucked tomato or his handsome face was between you and God.

He lets out an irritated chuckle, the gleam of his canines prominent from the light of the monitor behind you. "Has it ever struck you in that head of yours that I like talking to you?" He places a hand on one of your arm rests. "That I enjoy your sass, your passion?"

There's that funny feeling again, that feeling from when he revealed himself to you. Discovering such a big revelation from Miguel, something you've dreamed of nearly every night, but now that it's in the palm of your hand, you can't bring yourself to think properly.

"But I– I thought that–"

"It's a yes or no question, hermosa. Answer it."

"No."

The back of your chair hits the wood of your desk as Miguel pushes you, he dwarfs your suroundings, his presence much larger now that both of you are in a place so confined. Now that he wasn't "couchridden". At this proximity, you wouldn't be surprised if he could hear your heartbeat.

"Think again," his other hand moves to tug on your bottom lip as he clashes his own against yours, your whole body tenses and for a split second, he thinks he's seriously messed up this time, until you groan into his mouth and that thought is straight out the window.

Your hands map out his body, from the broad shoulders, tracing the muscle connecting them to his neck, then to the soft hair that you've been dying to touch ever since you've laid your eyes upon it. Your fingers ultimately find home in the curls at the ends.

It's almost filthy. His other hand now trailing down to your neck, wrapping deft fingers around your throat and it causes you to arch your back into him.

He uses his grip on you as leverage to separate, left panting and with a memory to use for later.

"We should get dinner sometime,"

"When are you free?"

"Friday. 7PM."

"Okay," and you lean in to kiss him again.

[daemon-in-my-head]

A list about how one could potentially percieve Gortash as a bottom and/or more submissive partner (and definitely not just cuz my brain worms demand it)

That man is all about power. But that's taxing y'all. Yet control is cool. And where could you possibly give up your 'power' while still retaining control? In the bedroom. Just like a lot of other people in higher positions or with some amount of 'power' like it. As well as control freaks. Yk man studied and got a safe word and all but he'd also shoot his shot in 2 seconds flat if you tie him up like a cute little xmas present.

That dude worships the floor Durge walks on. He praises Durge's achievements in multiple instances, and cherishes the letters and all (mf has a scrapbook, ffs). All in all, down bad simp behaviour. Would 1000% sub for a partner like that and just in general do everything that's being asked of him and more because he's an overachiever.

Banites are professional bootlickers. Their hierarchy is based on who can kiss ass the best. The number 1 employee of the month gets to be Bane's chosen and probably a rimjob.

The whole fist bit. I don't need to explain, @laubritter has already blessed us.

He was raised by a bottom. It runs in the adopted family.

He already considers Durge to be a god. He literally says that. And while Durge has a divine spark they're not a god. But Lord Gortash does not give a flying fuck despite knowing that. See this post for reference.

Also like, he can be submissive and a top, or he could be a bottom and so fucking dominant. He could also just be a service dom or really into the whole worshipping bit. Perhaps a praise or degradation kink here and there. That man checks a lot of boxes thanks to being a conundrum. Also also, switches are a thing.

But yeah, bottoming and subbing are not mutually exclusive, though he does strike me as daddy's good little boy who will go down on his knees as soon as the right person looks at him funny. Because his dairies read like that. Yk, his most personal possessions.

But that's just me. Also while I'm at it, I'm a supporter of the quickshot bit that's been going on. Have you seen his Ludwig VI pants? The ones that highlight his crotch? Yk there's some compensation or smth going on there. It's the Mercedes Benz of ancient times.

[sprintrecruiting]

The Essential Guide to Recruiting and Retaining Top Talent

In the world of business, finding and retaining the best talent for your organization can make or break you. You not only need to find great people who will be successful in their roles but also those who fit into and contribute positively to your company culture. To assist employers in this important task, we’ve put together The Essential Guide to Recruiting and Retaining Top Talent. This guide…

[human-for-tonight]

the thing about watcher is I think buzzfeed unsolved fucked them over. both in terms of numbers but also in terms of output. if you go to buzzfeed unsolved network and sort by popular, you have to scroll past 84 videos before you get below 10mil views. and a lot of those are 5-7 years old, so those are numbers they would've been looking at when deciding to break off from buzzfeed (the first watcher video was posted 4 years ago). they thought they could get big numbers without constantly churning out videos, because that's what they'd gotten with buzzfeed unsolved. and I'm sure they adjusted their projected numbers to account for people not following over to the new channel, but I doubt they predicted their top videos would be in the 8mil views range (which is still a lot, but not what they had pulled in the past).

so they aren't getting old buzzfeed unsolved numbers, but that's okay! look at the try guys - they aren't putting up millions of views every video and they're able to have a company with a decent amount of employees. and this is where the output issue comes in. between their main channel and their various podcasts, try guys is putting out 5 videos a week, with 2 being main channel videos. watcher is putting out 3 with 1 being a main channel video. plenty of people who have been making videos for a while have talked about the youtube grind and the algorithm - there's a reason daily vlogs and content houses got so big. and watcher didn't want to do that grind. from the beginning they've said they want to do seasons of shows. which is feasible! again, this is something try guys does with without a recipe. but the difference is try guys has quick and cheap videos they can put out in between and concurrently with those big shows that help support them. eat the menu is their best example of this because it gets big numbers. watcher doesn't really have filler videos.

to further the try guys comparison, buzzfeed unsolved limited the type of content fans were looking for in a way try guys was never limited because trying new things is a really fucking broad category. try guys was always more about the people than the specific thing they were trying. obviously a lot of fans of watcher like ryan and shane (and to a lesser extent steven, based on how many people are blaming him specifically for this). but I'm sure there were also people only watching because they liked true crime and/or ghost hunting content, which makes it harder to branch out and retain ghost files numbers on their other shows.

overall, they thought they could be buzzfeed with just unsolved, and that's not how youtube works and now it's fucking them over that they got too ambitious too fast

[scoops-aboy86]

(Continued from this, in which Eddie tried to cast a love spell to snag Steve Harrington but it didn’t go right and just made Steve inexplicably popular.)

Anyway, once Steve starts that Scoops Ahoy job, any hopes of retaining his jock figure are toast.

Whenever Eddie visits, Steve sets him up in a booth with a guess-the-mystery flavor milkshake. Every once in a while Steve will swing by during table wiping duties (which his cranky coworker Robin is more than happy to let him take more often than not) and ask what his guess is, and Eddie being Eddie gives the most off the wall answers he can think of. To which Steve will tilt his head, take a sip of the milkshake himself as if to refresh his memory, set it down while smacking his lips thoughtfully (Eddie’s favorite part, he always zeros in on it), and say, “Nope, better luck next guess.” Needless to say, he ends up drinking most of the milkshake, especially since Eddie is a slow drinker and doesn’t like it as much once it’s all melted. (Steve, who has developed quite the sweet tooth, thinks it’s endearing when Eddie insists that ice cream should be chewed.)

Employees can get up to one complimentary item every shift, so Steve also eats at least one full serving of ice cream a day.

There’s a toping limit on that deal, but what management seems to have failed to take into account is that the workers aren’t terribly well supervised in the absence of paying customers. Both Steve and Robin each have their own “spilled toppings” cup under the front counter, although the latter refills his more frequently and sometimes pours chocolate sauce on top before eating it all in one sitting with a spoon.

Meanwhile, Steve. Is. Loving this. He understands Eddie’s cafeteria table ramblings more, he thinks, now that he’s eating like this after years conforming and shoehorning his appetite into an athlete’s diet.

Also, like… Eddie is totally different from any friend can remember ever having before. Thinking back to their earliest interactions, he doesn’t think Eddie even wanted anything to do with him at first, and doesn’t seem to want anything from him now besides company, even if it’s just in the form of Eddie writing his campaigns in the Scoops parlor while Steve’s working. For another, Eddie’s eyes sometimes follow him the way all the high school girls’ used to, only instead of feeling on the spot or nervous Steve is just… comfortable with it. He’d never been able to figure out why he got all that attention in high school because it had started before he’d even done anything, but with Eddie every step towards becoming friends had been a conscious struggle.

So if Steve starts leaning into whatever gets Eddie’s eyes on him like that, is that really so big a deal? He’s always liked attention, so sue him—and when he ends up realizing that it happens whenever he’s being most himself, well. He’s never felt like anyone really liked him for him anymore, not even Nancy since ‘bullshit’ and ‘tell me you love me.’ The fact that Eddie does drives him wild.

And Steve likes to eat. He feels more grounded in this bigger version of himself. Eddie’s always watching his mouth, his hands, his fingers (especially when he’s licking drips of ice cream off them)—so Steve happily keeps indulging however he feels like.

One day Steve is wiping down tables and bends down a little too far to grab some fallen napkins off the floor. He feels more than hears the fabric of his blue uniform shorts rip, and all but leaps into the booth Eddie is haunting before anyone else sees, sits close to him because he likes the proximity. One glance is enough to know that Eddie definitely saw, his big Bambi eyes open wide, eyebrows anll the way up his forehead… and hair pulled across his face in an attempt to hide flushed cheeks, caught in the act of staring at Steve’s ass.

That’s what gives Steve the confidence to lean in a little bit and flirt, ask to borrow Eddie’s jacket (no one else in this town would wear leather in summer) so he can get back behind the counter and change. Eddie hands it over immediately, and flushes even harder when Steve grins and says, “My hero.”

It doesn’t have to mean anything, but he wants it to.

Part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8, part 9, part 10, part 11

[sunshinesmebdy]

Asteroid Wage Enters Gemini: Tips for Thriving in the Whirlwind

Brace yourselves for a celestial shift that’s set to shake up the market: asteroid Wage is setting foot in the nimble, ever-curious sign of Gemini. Buckle up, because the next year promises volatility, adaptability, and yes, even potential financial gains for those who navigate this transit wisely.

What is Asteroid Wage in Gemini?

Think of Wage as the cosmic paymaster, highlighting areas of earning potential and value exchange. In Gemini, the realm of communication, information, and versatility, Wage gets supercharged. Expect dynamic shifts in labor markets, evolving payment models, and a renewed focus on skills and flexibility over tenure.

Impacts for Businesses:

Embrace the gig economy: The Gemini Wage favors agile operations and independent contractors. Consider outsourcing tasks and diversifying your workforce to adapt to changing demands.

Ditch the nine-to-five and hello, dynamic duo! Gemini Wage thrives on adaptability and short-burst projects, so tap into the gig economy to fuel your flexibility. Outsource tasks, embrace a diverse team of independent contractors, and watch your business pirouette through changing demands with the grace of a celestial ballerina. This isn’t just cost-effective, it’s a cosmic recipe for agility and growth.

Invest in communication: Clear communication is key to attracting and retaining talent. Streamline internal processes, refine your marketing message, and invest in technology that facilitates collaboration.

Make your message a megaphone under Gemini Wage! Crystal-clear communication is your golden key to talent, both attracting new stars and keeping your current team in orbit. Polish your internal processes to gleaming, hone your marketing message to a razor-sharp point, and invest in tech that fosters collaboration like a cosmic chatroom. Remember, in this whirlwind transit, the loudest, clearest voices soar highest.

Upskill your team: Be prepared for rapid changes in technology and market trends. Encourage continuous learning and invest in retraining programs to keep your employees relevant.

Equip your team for the cosmic roller coaster! Gemini Wage craves adaptability, so prioritize continuous learning and upskilling programs. Encourage tech-savvy side hustles, invest in retraining that flexes with market trends, and watch your employees morph from cogs in the machine to versatile, innovative problem-solvers. Remember, in this whirlwind, the sharpest minds reap the richest rewards.

Rethink traditional compensation: Bonus structures, profit-sharing models, and performance-based incentives become more attractive under Gemini Wage. Consider adopting alternative salary structures to motivate and retain talent.

Toss out the dusty old salary spreadsheets and embrace the dynamic dance of Gemini Wage! This transit demands agility, and that extends to how you compensate your team. Think beyond the rigid monthly wage. Bonus structures that reward quick wins and innovative ideas become gold under this celestial influence. Consider profit-sharing models, where your team’s success directly translates to their pockets, fostering a culture of ownership and shared goals. Performance-based incentives, tailored to individual strengths and contributions, light a fire under even the most seasoned employee. Remember, in the whirlwind of Gemini Wage, a little creative compensation can go a long way in attracting and retaining top talent. So, ditch the one-size-fits-all approach and get ready to tango with a compensation system that’s as adaptable and exciting as the cosmic twins themselves!

Investing and Finance:

Focus on agility and diversification: Gemini favors short-term, high-growth investments and sectors like tech, media, and communication. Don’t be afraid to experiment and spread your bets.

Ditch the tortoise, embrace the hummingbird! Under Gemini Wage, agility reigns supreme. Invest in short-term, high-growth ventures, particularly in the tech, media, and communication galaxies. Spread your bets like cosmic confetti, experimenting with diverse projects and sectors. Don’t be afraid to pivot and adapt, for in this whirlwind market, nimbleness is your golden ticket to stratospheric returns. Remember, diversification is the secret sauce, so keep your portfolio a constellation of possibilities, ready to catch the next supernova of opportunity.

Stay informed and adaptable: Be nimble enough to react to sudden market shifts. Embrace news apps, financial forecasts, and astrological timing (yes, even!) to make informed decisions.

Become a cosmic chameleon under Gemini Wage! Stay nimbler than a celestial ninja, ready to dodge and weave through sudden market shifts. Embrace financial forecasts and news apps like your personal oracle, but don’t underestimate the whispers of the stars. Align your investments with astrological timing, tuning into energy shifts for informed decisions. Remember, under this whirlwind transit, knowledge is power, and a sprinkle of celestial awareness can be the secret weapon that sets you apart from the herd. So, keep your ear to the ground, your eyes on the charts, and your mind open to the whispers of the cosmos — it’s the recipe for navigating the financial galaxy with grace and prosperity.

Look for the hidden value: Gemini’s sharp eye can uncover undervalued assets and innovative opportunities. Think outside the box and explore emerging markets and disruptive technologies.

This transit sharpens your eye to spot undervalued assets lurking in plain sight, like diamonds in the rough. Think beyond the obvious, explore emerging markets where innovation ripples like a sonic boom, and embrace disruptive technologies that could rewrite the financial rulebook. Remember, under Gemini’s curious gaze, the unconventional can become your goldmine. So, ditch the herd mentality, channel your inner maverick, and unearth the treasures waiting just beyond the edge of the financial map. The rewards for the adventurous investor are written in the stars!

Tips for Thriving with Gemini Wage:

Sharpen your communication skills: The more effectively you communicate your value, the more opportunities you attract. Honing your negotiation and presentation skills will pay off.

Network like a pro: Gemini thrives on connections. Build relationships with potential partners, clients, and collaborators. Your network is your net worth under this transit.

Embrace change and flexibility: Don’t get stuck in outdated models. Be open to new ideas, explore diverse perspectives, and adapt quickly to market shifts.

Focus on learning and adaptability: Invest in personal and professional development. Hone your skills, upgrade your knowledge, and stay ahead of the curve in your field.

So, entrepreneurs and financiers, are you ready to dance with the whirlwind? Let’s see what fortunes await under the sign of the twins!

[sihasah]

Attracting Top Talent: The Ultimate Small Company Benefits Package

In the competitive landscape of today's job market, small businesses often face the challenge of attracting and retaining top talent. While they might not have the financial resources of larger corporations, small companies can still create a compelling benefits package that appeals to prospective employees. A well-crafted benefits package not only demonstrates a company's commitment to its employees but also fosters a positive work environment and enhances employee engagement. In this comprehensive article, we delve into the essential elements of a small company benefits package and provide actionable insights to help small businesses build a competitive offering. https://sihasah.com/attracting-top-talent-the-ultimate-small-company-benefits-package/