#ren x wels knight

[nekodere07]

Tango is a bad influence

I had fun doing this

BdoubleO100/Pungence - B/Pungence of the Double-o Variety

Cubfan135 - Cub of the Fan Variety

Docm77 - Docm of the Seventy-seven Variety

EthosLab - Etho of the Slab Variety

FalseSymmetry - False of the Symmetry Variety

GoodTimesWithScar - Scar of the Goodtime Variety

Grian - Grian of the Bread Variety

GeminiTay - Gemini of the Tay Variety

Hypnotizd - Hypno of the Tizd Variety

iJevin - iJevin of the Slime Variety

ImpulseSV - Impulse of the SV Variety

Iskall85 - Iskall of the Eighty-five Variety

JoeHills - Joe of the Hills Variety

Keralis - Keralis of the One Variety

MumboJumbo - Mumbo of the Jumbo Variety

PearlescentMoon - Pearlescent of the Moon Variety

Rendog - Ren of the Dog Variety

StressMonster101 - Stress of the Monster Variety

TangoTek - Tango of the Tek Variety

TinFoilChef - Chef of the Tinfoil Variety

VintageBeef - Beef of the Vintage Variety

Welsknight - Wels of the Knight Variety

xBCrafted - xB of the Crafted Variety

Xisumavoid/Evil X - Xisuma/Evil X of the Void Variety

ZedaphPlays - Zedaph of the Plays Variety

ZombieCleo - Cleo of the Zombie Variety

[viky-somebody]

pretty cool fic list

dog at the door - fluffy_papaya (absolute fave. Red King)

I still Bleed When i Fall Down - Paranoid_Pug (MCC gets attacked by watcher hunters)

And The Universe Shifts - aayaptre (fandom history)

fixed and dilated - iamsolarflare (Hypno & xB special hybrid powers shenanigans) 

Cause We Are Whole - ooFFFF (Tango becomes a robot and finds a new friend)

Nothing But Flowers - nho (Etho & myceluim resistance +nho references, unfinished and abandoned)

Still the Echoes Give Us Light - doctortrekkie (VERY good watcher grian series, HC + Traffic life series events.)

Eldritch Horror Keralis - MawoftheMagnetar (exactly what it says. but also oh so much more)

prometheus and the livewire - storm_warning (Ren the king is struggling. Doc is quiet and theres no news from him)

They say that the world was built for two - GardenerGulfie (Ren and Martyn keep meeting in different lives. aromantic Ren pog)

Torchlight - Skelew (Ren is a god of a dead city stuck in the form of a torchlight and Martyn is his only follower)

the last days of the free angel of carrows - Bee_4 (Joe Hills and Zombie Cleo run a paranormal activity agency in a modern city. Cleo is a literal undead, Joe is a renowned angel, and together they get tied with a conspiracy against the city mayor.)

Lady Cleo, King Ren, and the Trials of The Midwest - storm_warning (Cleo and King Ren get teleported to Ohio)

Against The Clock - Leopardmask (Set in season 8, Evil X got possessed and the Horse Head Farms plus Wels and Jevin decide to deal with that) (Jevin is a slime & vex hybrid)

The Sky Weighs Heavy Tonight - MaoftheMagnetar (pilot au, set in a world with genetic mutations caused by a past war. gone emotional)

Joehills' Moderately Haunted House - zombiiehorse (Modern au, Joe buys a new house for a suspiciosly low price)

Monsters Splitting Hairs - Silverskye13 (Ren, Doc and Gem live in a village, forced to disguise as humans, bc of the history of the town) (great worldbuilding)

Lonesome Dreams - doctorletmebebrave (Jimmy Solidarity gets separated after the dragon fights and accepts a deal from the Listeners)

Lend Me A Hand - SolSearchingNights (Ponk sneaks onto hermitcraft and vents to Doc about their relationship with Sam)

Redstone and Skulk - Silverskye13 (Tango's helsmit Tanguish & Helsknight, delicious hels worlduilding)

Åttiofem - MawoftheMagnetar (Iskall has a terrible day getting kidnapped and finally discovers something about his past) (slight Stresskall shipping)

there are many downsides to being a marine biologist - donnerstag (modern day au with hybrids, Doc is a scientist studying a siren!Martyn whos been newly caught for their facility) (DOCMARTYN FISH YAOI LETS GO)

Ad Nauseam - mycelium_menace (Dawndragon) (Joe Hills is stuck in a timeloop. One day, a wild Cleo appears to shake him out of his apathy)

Black skies have changed into blue - GoodTimesWithScar (Oli Orionsound finds a wild Martyn, whos been reverse isekai'ed back from the datastream)

(i'll tend to the flames you can worship the) ashes - darubyprincxx (amazing post-rapture season 1 empires work. Fwhip and Gem survived and are on the run. They find a Pixlriffs, who's been missing for 8 years.)

Ad Astra - Moonsetvoid (Secret Life, the Watchers take a special interest in Scar. He ends up teaming up with Grian again.)

перепутье долга и выбора - M.Malevich (fic in russian, Fantasy AU Smalletho, Etho is a knight serving his king Grian. Joel and Lizzie are a pair of criminals attempting an assassination at a ball)

The Beginning After The Bad Ending - EvilRat_Sabre (Season 8 collapses due to a dangerous glitch, xB and Jevin being the only survivors manage to escape to a world where they never joined hermitcraft in an attempt to get help)

misc., *mostly* smaller fics

Empires

Kids in empires, what will they do?  - Faffodill (Hermes, Michael and Grumbot messing around)

food IS a love language and i will fight you on this - darubyprincxx (Hermes overhears a discussion between his parents)

Empires Strike Back - Leopardmask (A retelling of the Hermempires crossover. The emperors decide they don't like to be pushed around.)

Count fWhip Fails a Blood Test - darubyprincxx (set in empires season 1)

survivorship bias - Bee_4 (Jimmy wakes up in a city of New Pixandria, after the season 1 Rapture, with little to no memory of who he was before)

Fuck Around and Find Out - Moonstone_Kat (Sheriff Jimmy wants to finally end all the jokes about him being a toy and decides to pull off the most elaborate prank on his friends)

Hermitcraft

a not so calculated catch - vexberries (Mermaid!Scar and a sceptic Cub, who does not believe in mermaids but gets a crush anyway)

this is about a stuffed bird - Bee_4 (Mumbo and Evil X survive the apocalypse in a modern au)

Four Hearts - PieOfDeath (Jlethubs valentines day fluff)

Wind Back The Clock - guy56 (Bdubs and Etho have existed in many worlds and timelines yet they still keep meeting each other)

Hermit City Heroes series - 2point5 (Superhero AU) (actually pretty long)

What's The Letter That Starts The Alphabet (Ayy!) - Darubyprincxx (Team STAR look at Rens Very Bad presentation)

Joe Hills, Joe Hills, Joe Hills - leopardmask (the guy gets possessed)

The Rising Moon, The Setting Sun (series) - Dillbug (Watcher Grian, worshipper Xisuma, runaway s9 Pearl + Bonus Drista)

We're not that different, you and I - swemae (grian and scar talk about vex magic)

cmon mumbo dont tell me youve never heard of a stable time loop - Sixteenthdays (Mumbo gets his soul back)

bad things come in small packages - kiwinatorwaffles (Jimmy is a Watcher and vouches for Grian to become one as well)

Found - sparxwrites (Grian saves Scar from the Boatem hole)

I lost the old, guess I need something new - SkyWillSomeTimesWrite (Grian needs glasses)

What Does It Mean To Truly Live? - Wrenny_Fang_03 (an okay Watcher Grian thing where Xisuma is also an ex-Watcher. not my thing tbh but it was alright)

A Dog's Nose - dontrollthedice (Ren asks about Etho and Beefs relationship)

Guys and Dolls - Leopardmask (cool Doll Grian concept)

Sticker War - darkleweather

Name-Calling is NOT supposed to suck this badly (One chapter with a cool concept. Grian hears everyone who says his true name)

Buddy System - (Ren & Grian in the End)

Healing Is a Four Letter Word - Hypno_cat (Grian is a cryptid, joins hc in secret and hides in the woods)

an observer in a land of none - jaysflight (vague fantasy, watcher Grian (Veld) and Scar) (really loved this)

Inversing Allocation - Interjection (5+1 watcher Grian stuff)

Following in Pandoras footsteps - Paranoid_Pug (Grian gets a surprise present)

send me a wave via subspace - FangirlOfPower (Joe is stuck outside the world and communicates with Cleo via voicemail)

When This World Is No More (The Moon is All We'll See) - Silverskye13 (Season 8 moon crush, sad)

To Convey a Certain Brilliance - Bee_4 (Joe dies repeatedly while trying to find hermits after the moon fell)

An Inhuman Waltz - MawoftheMagnetar (Jev stole one of Cleo's armor stands for unknown reasons)

It Takes Two to Tango - EyelessFog (Tango realizes he might be a system)

The Guppy Geiser's Miraculous Return - simplydm (the guppy geiser returns!)

Investigative Journalism - jaz_it_up (Pix and Sloy explore ruins of the season 8 world to find if anyone survived)

Heart Storm - Duchess_Of_Dumpsters (one cool chapter of Joe and Wels shipping)

The guy who conquers death- ooFFFF (Zedeath tries to hunt down Joe)

The Orange Promise - bloop_im_a_frog_now (Cub and Scar are forced to get engaged by Cub's rich parents)

Назад на землю - Refling (fic in russian, Tango tries the boat floating glitch and gets a ptsd flashback)

De Roeping // The Calling - AstronautBeans (fic in Dutch with eng translation, water on the server turned everyone weird, xB and Hypno are on the run)

Put Down Your Roots - HitheePrithee (modern AU Doc/Xisuma, the two have known each other for a while and know how to work around each other's disabilities while living together. soft)

dream smp~

passerine - blujamas, thcscus

His Curse of Binding - bari_astralis (greek mythology themed au with reincarnation into modern times. the events of the early dream smp seasons are ancient history) (cried my eyes out)

Incarnate Inchoate - underoriginal (Dream is sent to hermitcraft and is forced to rethink his life choices)

Up For a Fight? (Tommy escapes the server to live a life by a fighting arena, changes in a lot of ways) (some typos in the text)

Black Bird Fly - MollyPollyKinz (everybody has wings and magic powers and tommy is a kidnapped prince)

It Feels Like Murder (Dream finds Sams body in the prison)

something you can’t bottle up - doingthewritethings (Tommy is slowly dealing with trauma)

Watch Untill The End - Noem (Dsmp fic in czech, a small reimagining of how the server was created, tied in with Evo and Tekkit lore)

The places that I've been to, I can't remember what I saw - metatronfell (Tubbo is dealing with DID symptoms)

How to Sex Vol. 4-58 - Goldenrayofsunshine (Tommy is stuck with Dream in prison and writes books.)

others

that one time aztro went to space and came back with an alien - SDMP Backstory

Ghosts in the Sky - trafficpose (space au Docmartyn)

Minecraft but I have SEX in PARKOUR CIVILIZATION (Evbo wants to get a child to pass the Parkour Civilization legacy onto. Masterpiece. Psychic damage warning.)

[welsknight-central]

this post will kind of act like a directory of all the wels knight and hels knight shipping posts that can be found on this blog ^-^

the general tag for any posts with shipping of wels knight or hels knight is #hermitshipping

hermits with wels:

#bdubs x wels knight

#beef x wels knight

#biffa x wels knight

#cleo x wels knight

#doc x wels knight

#etho x wels knight

#evil xisuma x wels knight

#grian x wels knight

#hypno x wels knight

#jevin x wels knight

#pearl x wels knight

#python x wels knight

#ren x wels knight

#scar x wels knight

#stress x wels knight

#tango x wels knight

#wels knight x hels knight

#xisuma x wels knight

#hermits x wels knight *this one is for posts that may have either hermitcraft as a huge polycule or multiple ships with wels (like more than 3 in one post)

hermits with hels:

#evil xisuma x hels knight

#impulse x hels knight

#scarlet pearl x hels knight

#wels knight x hels knight

#wormman x hels knight

#hermits x hels knight *this one is for posts that may have either hermitcraft as a huge polycule or multiple ships with hels (like more than 3 in one post)

other random ships:

#eret x wels knight

#eret x hels knight

#martyn x wels knight

#reader x hels knight

#satan x hels knight

[silverskye13]

I don't remember if you ever explained this or not, but what's up with Tanguish saying he is killing Tango? I am guessing it is something to do with the skulk?

I know I've talked about it before, but it's probably been scattered across a lot of different shortfics [and talked a little bit in chapter 2&4 of the whole Redstone and Skulk fic in a somewhat blink-and-you'll-miss-it way].

I'm going to go ahead and lay the concept out in full, but like, warning: spoilers for all of the helsmit fics and shorts [Wels/Hels, Tango/Tanguish, and Ren/TheRedKing]

So in my little set of universe, helsmits au... Stuff... Basically the universe doesn't like that the hermits make helsmits.

Helsmits are made when hermits start to face a dark side of themselves, an inconvenient truth, or a dichotomy they don't like. For Wels/Hels, it's their idea of knighthood. Wels is the idealized white knight, Hels is the gritty, holding to your tenents even if it means killing people knight. They are a clash of ideals, and by definition both think the other is Being A Knight Wrong. Together they encapsulate the idea of "Sometimes to do good, very evil things are justified in the process."

For Tango/Tanguish, it's toxic codependence. It's being alone because you're sure of yourself/a little introverted vs being alone because you're self-isolating/filled with social anxiety to the point it's hurting your friendships. Together they encapsulate the idea that you can genuinely care a lot about someone and still be toxic, and that care and toxicity can be mutual. Humans weren't made to live in tiny 2 person isolated groups. We can, but there's a lot of angry psychology that tends to happen when we do.

[Ren and Red are a bit fuzzier. I never really hammered them out. Mostly it's Red thinks Ren is a coward for handling 3rd life the way he did, and Ren thinks Red is just a scary jerk. Something something appreciating the life you're given, something something remember your mortality something something friends make our short lives worth it. It was very hazy and existential I was coping with things when I was outlining those]

What happens when the hermits face these issues is, eventually they get past them. And since the hermit was there first, that generally [9 times out of 10] means the hermit grows as a person and moves on, and helsmit stops existing. It's like a physical incarnation of the "growing and changing through the plot" thing that happens during most character arcs. I wrote a short [Voices of Hels? I think it was called? Something like that] where Cub talks about absorbing his hels version and that's why his skin changed from old man to young dude. I used to have a list? Of hermits that didn't have hels versions anymore? I think Zedaph and Doc were on that list. And Gem. I need to find that list again. [In my funny little world I also justify Xisuma having so many helsmits (Evil X and Evil Beezuma for example) because he basically runs from his issues for so long he fundamentally changes as a person, and this he makes a new helsmit wholecloth once the previous issue no longer applies. I also feel like there are probably circumstances where a helsmet can disappear and then reappear later in life when someone faces an old or similar problem again. (Well well well if it isn't the consequences of my actions back again-- [gets tackled by my evil clone]).

For Wels/Hels, Helsknight has pretty solidly accepted his fate is to disappear into Welsknight at some point. His biggest goal until that happens is to, basically, make Welsknight strong enough to actually do good in the world. It's not an altruistic thing. He things Welsknight is weak, is a bad knight, and represents the kind of slothfulness that happens when you live a relatively carefree life. He makes Wels miserable on purpose, because he thinks that's the only way it'll make him stronger. And if Welsknight is strong enough to do good in the world, then hey, Helsknight can disappear into the aether knowing he didn't die for nothing [I feel like you kinda have to have a martyr complex on some level to be a good knight, RIP all the knight characters I've ever written].

For Tango and Tanguish though, Tango isn't trying to be a better person. He's not trying to get over his codependency and social anxiety to reconnect with his friends. He's feeding into is isolation bad habits, and in so doing, is feeding into Tanguish. If he keeps going at the rate he's going, someday Tango will collapse and stop existing, and Tanguish will be the only one left standing. Tanguish doesn't want this [he is just as codependent on Tango as his hermit is on him] and he's also starting to figure out he doesn't like the self-feeding cycle of never having contact outside of each other. He's decided he's going to break their cycle by forcing Tango [and also himself] to branch out.

In Chapter 4 of the Redstone and Sculk series, where Tanguish corners Helsknight to ask him for help, and Helsknight says stuff about "how rare it is that one of us wins", that's what he's talking about. Tanguish could be the last man standing and he's actively choosing not to. Helsknight, who doesn't think it's physically possible for him to win against Wels, thinks it's really, really stupid that Tanguish would just give something like that up.

So! Yeah! Hope? That answers everything? Clears things up? Most of this was supposed to come out either:

A) In the next couple chapters of Redstone and Sculk

B) When I finally got around to writing that Wels/Hels body swap fic I started writing and then stopped writing because MSH is my baby right now and I can't focus on two things at once

[sexymanxisuma]

this post will kind of act like a directory of all the xisuma and evil xisuma shipping posts that can be found on this blog ^-^

the general tag for any posts with shipping of xisuma or evil xisuma is #hermitshipping

hermits with xisuma:

#bdubs x xisuma

#biffa x xisuma

#cleo x xisuma

#cub x xisuma

#doc x xisuma

#etho x xisuma

#false x xisuma

#gem x xisuma

#grian x xisuma

#hels knight x xisuma

#hypno x xisuma

#impulse x xisuma

#iskall x xisuma

#jevin x xisuma

#joe hills x xisuma

#joel x xisuma

#keralis x xisuma

#mumbo x xisuma

#pearl x xisuma

#ren x xisuma

#scar x xisuma

#skizz x xisuma

#stress x xisuma

#tango x xisuma

#wels knight x xisuma

#xb x xisuma

#xisuma x evil xisuma

#zedaph x xisuma

#hermits x xisuma *this one is for posts that may have either hermitcraft as a huge polycule or multiple ships with xisuma (like more than 3 in one post)

hermits with evil xisuma:

#cleo x evil xisuma

#etho x evil xisuma

#grian x evil xisuma

#hels knight x evil xisuma

#hypno x evil xisuma

#keralis x evil xisuma

#mumbo x evil xisuma

#npc grian x evil xisuma

#wels knight x evil xisuma

#wormman x evil xisuma

#xisuma x evil xisuma

#zedaph x evil xisuma

#hermits x evil xisuma *this one is for posts that may have either hermitcraft as a huge polycule or multiple ships with evil xisuma (like more than 3 in one post)

empires:

#fwhip x xisuma

#jimmy x xisuma

#jimmy x evil xisuma

#pixlriffs x xisuma

#smajor x evil xisuma

#xornoth x evil xisuma

#empires x xisuma *this is for posts with either empires as a huge polycule x xisuma or multiple ships with xisuma (like more than 3)

other random ships:

#bertha darling x evil xisuma

#bigb x xisuma

#cabby x evil xisuma

#el mariana x evil xisuma

#napoleon x evil xisuma

#noxintrus x evil xisuma

#satan x evil xisuma

#zloy x xisuma

[moonstarsongs]

after staring at this and finally guessing all the hermits, i present to you: the s10 variant including Joel and Skizz!!

complete list of hermits below the cut (i spent too long on this)

minecraft dog - Ren (the dog)

minecraft sheep - Zed (is that sheep looking at me?)

goat - Doc (the GOAT)

patch of moss - Bdubs (moss man)

lion cub with a foam finger - Cubfan

Kakashi from naruto - Etho (they're both wet cats it doesn't matter)

crown, heads, body parts (arms) and hearts - False, queen of hearts, heads and body parts

red-yellow-blue parrot - Grian (bird boy, pesky bird)

@ symbol - Joe (his. shirt. yk)

shrek - Joel (he had that skin for an ABNORMALLY long period)

diamond - GEM

hypno pokemon in minecraft - Hypno

googly eyes - Keralis (BIG EYES)

"The letter i" - Impulse (kinda his brand)

Scar from the lion king - Scar (also DISNEY!)

a pink stress ball - Stress (gorgeous pink btw)

a pearl/moon in a shell - Pearlescentmoon (except it's not really pearlescent but shh)

Pringles man - Mumbo (glorious moustache)

some blue slime anime - Jevin (ofc. blue slime man)

beef - Beef

armour - Wels (knight)

tinfoil ball - TFC (tinfoil. yk)

two people dancing the tango - Tango (of the Tek variety)

"The letter s" - Skizz (they're matching!!)

zombie - Cleo (zombie. obvious)

no diorite! - Iskall (literally a burning hatred for this specific stone)

guardian - xB (he's a guardian definitely)

doomguy - X (what can i say. he's literally doomguy)

Productive use of my time at 5am

[wither-rose-circus]

Okay y’know what, hermit full name headcanons

B. “Bdubs” O. O.

Cub Fan

Doctor [REDACTED] “Doc” M. (known to give conflicting answers as to what the M stands for)

Etho “Etho Slab” [REDACTED] (tends to sign under the “company name” of Etho’s Lab, but due to issues with punctuation and spacing on most name registries, often gets misinterpreted as “Etho Slab,” which he rarely corrects)

False Symmetry

Scarson “Scar” Good-Times

Grian [REDACTED] (claims to not have a last name, this is a lie, he does not remember what it was)

Hypnotize D.

Jevin I.

Impulse S. V.

Iskall [REDACTED] (known to give conflicting answers when asked for a last name)

Joe Hills

Keralis [REDACTED] (claims to not have a last name, this may or may not be true)

Mumbo Jumbo

Ren Dog

Stress Monster

Tango “Tango Tek” [REDACTED] (often signs under the “company name” of Tango Technology, which he later shortened to Tango Tek, claiming it was “more catchy”)

Tin “TFC” Foil Chef

Beef Vintage

Wels Knight

X. B. Crafted

Xisuma Void

Zedaph Plays

Cleo [REDACTED] (if asked to give a last name, she will simply add “Zombie”)

[hermitcraft-au-time]

Reverse AU

An AU I'm trying to write the fic for, and one I've thought up of myself~

Instead of the classic beings with power saves other people, in this AU normal classic humans are the ones in charge. Mumbo and Keralis are the only two that are human. 

Mumbo and Grian (Avian) were friends as a child, but Grian was kidnapped when they were 12. Mumbo swore to do whatever it takes to find him. 

Mumbo eventually finds himself at an underground mob/hybrid selling ring. He meets Keralis, and the two have the same goal: To buy as many as they can and help them home. 

The first two they find are X and EX. The two are void walkers who were stolen from their home in the end as a child. X got a nasty scar on his face taking a punishment meant for his brother. EX highkey hates himself for it. The two brothers were supposed to be separated, but Mumbo and Keralis split up to buy the two's freedom. Mumbo eventually made X's helmet, both in order to cover up the scar and to help X breathe. EX asked for one that looked the same in order to emulate his brother. X and EX eventually offered to help protect their little world, as a Void walker has even more powers than a typical admin. 

Ren is a werewolf. He couldn't control his wolf side, and so was shunned by his village. Think a werewolf in Harry Potter. Eventually, he was found by Joe, who helped him come to an understanding with the wolf. Joe (Somehow) knows about Mumbo's and Keralis's little mission, and sent Ren to Keralis's city (season 7 base), where he stayed on Loser island for a while trying to control the wolf. He eventually settled down near Mumbo when his wolf side wanted to be near his "pack"

Doc and Iskall. These two are cyborgs, as well as Doc being a Creeper hybrid. Doc was captured first, as a tiny baby creeper. Iskall was sent in to retrieve him from the scientists, but was captured and also turned into a cyborg. When the two got saved, Mumbo offered to help keep their robotic bits in good condition. 

Meanwhile, Grian, Pearl and Gem (two avians and a deer hybrid) found each other cellmates. The two avians quickly adopted each other siblings, while Gem was a close friend. When a random commotion happened, Gem got a chance to escape and took it. 

Stress and TFC are related at some point. He's an Earth spirit, and Stress is his Druid granddaughter (Neither of them are sure if he's really her grandfather, but they know they're related at some point). Stress finds Mumbo and Ren after some random intendent. Their only healer, Keralis, as too far away from them to be much help, and Stress uses her powers to heal Ren. She sticks around as their resident healer. TFC eventually finds out about them, and while he doesn't interact with them much he always keeps an eye out for the lot. 

Scar and Cub. Scar is a vex. Like, an actual Vex. Cub is just a human who somehow befriended Scar. The two entered a contract to give Cub vex magic, but somehow it also made Scar human sized. While they try to escape the other Vex (who really didn't like the whole contract thing), they server hopped into hermitcraft, where the two help the hermits in their terraforming as a thanks for the protection. 

The knight duo are dragons. Like, legit dragons. Wels is the older of the two, and Hels was born a year or two after. Wels was dragon-napped first, and Hels swore to find him. However, by the time Hels found him, his brother was brainwashed into serving the kingdom and didn't reconize Hels. Heartbroken, Hels runs away and finds Joe, who helps break the brainwashing on Wels. Together, the two run away to, and meet Gem after trying to hunt her in deer form. She teachs the two how to turn into their hybrid forms, and the trio find their way to Hermitcraft. 

False. She was an Android, built with care to be the child of someone who couldn't have children. During this time, she developed an AI. However, she was stolen from her creator, who just wanted a robotic bodyguard. He had her reprogrammed into a solder, but somehow the AI managed to stay around. When the Hermits invaded in order to save Grian and Pearl, False forced herself to not fight, despite her "master's" commands. Doc eventually finds a way to get rid of the programming.

ZIT trio (Plus Beef) (Sheep, Guardian, and blaze hybrids, respectively, plus a centuar) 

Zed ran away from a crazy village one day, one that ate hybrid meat. They thought it would give them special powers or something. Was found by Beef, who lived in the woods nearby. The pair eventually find the dragon and deer trio. When they had to cross a large body of water some time later, they find Impulse floating in the water. He was casted out of the temple for even trying to shift into a hybrid (guardians have a strict no shifting rule. Impulse would rather have a more interesting life than guarding a stupid temple all the time). The same goes for Tango, but as a blaze hybrid in the nether. 

Bdubs (Time lord). He can control time! However, he can't control his power, leading him to have killing someone in the past (by aging the person up so much). He finds Joe, who once again helps him out by putting a lock on his power, so that it only comes out when he's sleeping, and never on a human (The reason for the server's one person sleep thing). Joe asks B-dubs to rewind a friend of his's body. Bdubs does, and with Joe's magic the two bring Cleo back to life (As a zombie). 

Jevin (slime). As the trio above start to make their way to the Hermitcraft server, they run into a cute lil blue slime. It didn't attack any of them, and Joe uses his powers to help the slime be able to form into a different shape. It turns out he was cursed into that form by a glitch that happened when he and a slime double KO'd each other. 

Etho (Kitsune, Nine tailed Fox) He and Beef were friends in that forest. When Beef left to join the travelers, he joined them. It just so happens that Beef didn't know that Etho was following him, he just gets pranked randomly.

If I missed anyone than I haven't watched them enough to figure out what they are, sorry! As for Joe? Who knows what he is? A mage strong enough to bring back the dead, but knows a lot of things about the world around him. 

[bugbbear]

here we go

Gem = Semi

Kiwen Utala (Fighting Gem) I ended Gem's name with an I sound because of her full username, gemini. Utala describes her pvp ability and Kiwen describes her resolve, as well as relating to gems and jewels, like her name.

Grian = Ijen

Suno Loje (Red Sun) There is no GR sound in toki pona, so I figured it was close enough to just remove it. I don't have a super good reason for calling Grian "Red Sun"; he always wears red, so Loje, and he often is given a sun motif, so Suno.

Mumbo = Manpo

Ilo Pakala (Broken Machine) When I told this one to a friend they got mad at me, because Ilo Pakala literally translates to Broken Machine. I think it's funny, especially because Pakala is also used as a curse word in toki pona.

Skizz = Kisi

Kalama Olin (Sound of Love) I'm ending Kisi with an I because I legally have to and also it sounds like "kissy" and I think he'd like that. Skizz is always yellin his affection for others, so I think this fits him pretty well.

Scar = Ka

Wawa Esun (Selling Confidence) Scar's name was one of the easiest to translate. His sitelen pona, however, was very difficult. I ended up with Wawa (strength/confidence) Esun (business/deals) because of his completely warranted confidence when scamming people.

Impulse = Enpu

Tomo Jelo (Home of Gold) Yellow for branding! I also think Impulse is the kind of person that is home to his friends, and "home of gold" can extrapolate to "heart of gold."

Joel = Jole

Pali Nasa (Unhinged Building) This one is pretty self explanatory, but it's also pretty basic. If you can do better, tell me your idea!

Bdubs = Pita

Musi Tenpo (Art of Time) You have no idea how long it took to figure out Bdubs's name. I promise this is the best we could do. I chose Musi (art) because everything he touches becomes beautiful and Tenpo (time) because of his whole sleeping-time king thing.

Keralis = Ketale

Oko Mani (Eye for Profit) This one I chose because Keralis has his classic huge and wide eyes (oko) and also is commonly one of the richest hermits (mani), but also because their combined meaning of Eye for Profit could describe his gambling addiction enjoyment.

Etho - Ito

Mama Seli (Creator of Explosions) I wanted to include Mama (creator/origionator) because of Etho's status as THE minecraft youtuber. I wanted to include Seli (explosion/fire) because of his proficiency in TNT. Together, they mean Creator of Explosions, and I think that's pretty fitting lol.

Tango = Tenko

Seli Musi (Artistic Chaos) Do I have to say anything other than Decked Out/j? Tango is quite chaotic and cartoonish (musi) and has a whole theme of fire (seli) so I think this one's pretty easy.

Xisuma = Esuma

Lawa Suwi (Soft Authority) Somehow the hardest name to pronounce in english is the easiest name to translate to toki pona X is a wet cat admin, and so I tried to translate that as best I could.

Wels = Weli

Nasin Utala (Fighting with Honor) This one I'm pretty proud of. It goes with his medieval knight theming and also describes how his southern rage is only being contained by his southern politeness.

Stress = Teso

Suwi Monsuta (Sweet Monster) Teso ends in O because the next part of Stress's name is mOnster. I called her Suwi Monsuta because although she's sweet (suwi) she's also terrifying (monsuta).

Iskall = Ikale

Lon Alasa (Hunter of Truth) This one I'm pretty proud of. Hunter (alasa) is a reference to his Vault Hunters modpack. But together with Lon (truth/reality), it describes his more recent approach to video making.

Rendog = Wenpa (or Ren = Wen)

Musi Soweli (Dog of Theature) Self explanatory. Soweli means Land Animal, the closest we've got to Dog, and Musi means art/theature/etc. Dog of Threature!

Pearl = Pelu

Ante Anpa (Upside-Down Alien) This translation is a bit of a stretch, but it's the closest I could get afaik. It more directly translates to different/odd/strange (ante) dowm/below/under (anpa).

Jevin = Jewen

Ko Poka (Slime Neighbor) Ko describes a formless mass/shape, like powder or in this case slime. Poka means next to, which I'm using to mean neighbor. Jevin is always getting involved with and pranking his neighbors, so I figured it fit. It also just sounds nice.

Cleo = Lijo

Ko Moli (Sculptor of Death) Ko also refers to clay, so I'm using it to mean sculpting here. Moli means death and dying. A friend pointed out that Ko also means shifting and formless, and could be used as a modifer to Moli to mean Undead, which is think is perfect.

Joe = Jo

Ijo Kulupu (Phenomenon of Community) I know I wanted Joe to have Kulupu (community) as one of his words because a large portion of what he does is for the hermitcraft community as a whole. Ijo can mean thing/something/phenomenon, and I couldn't think of a better descriptor for the enigma that is Joe Hills.

Xb = Epi

Kala Suwi (Sweet Fish) He just does fish things all the time, what can I say. Suwi here means soft or sweet, Soft to describe his voice and vibe and Sweet because that's what Keralis is always sayin to him lol.

Beef = Pisi

Musi Lipu (Art of Cards) You have no idea how hard it was to translate the name Beef into toki pona. I tried bro.

Docm = Taken

Ilo Nasa (Crazy Machines) The EN at the end of Taken is from trying to mimic the M at the end of DocM. Self explanatory words.

Hypno = Enjo

Kon Esun (Trader of Souls) I like this one, it's specifically referring to horsehead farms from season 8 where they'd take payment in IOUs (souls. to me). I also think it describes Hypno's fae-like qualities as well. Don't ask me to elaborate.

TFC = KiJenSi

Ma Ale (Homeland of All)

False = Pase

Alasa Sewi (Queen of Hunting) This one had me stumped for a while until I put these two words together. Sewi means above/sky/higher up, and in this case I'm using it to mean Queen, or someone higher in rank, as a reference to her Hermitgang verse.

Cub = Kapa

Soko Esun (Fungal Businessman) This one seems out there but I swear I have reasonings. Soko means fungus/mushrooms, and in this case I'm referring to Sculk. Esun is because of Cub's Convex hijinks with Scar.

Zedaph = Seta

Sono Nasa (Knowledge of Insanity) Last but not least, we have Zedaph. I have no way to describe Zedaph other than "he's doing whatever you didn't expect him to do." So I feel like this fits pretty well.

And that's it! I posted a version of this a couple days ago on Reddit to get advice on the tokiponaification of their names, and learned the phonics of toki pona are a lot more strict than I first realized. The users jan Elije and ClearGraces-Despair were very helpful, and I used their names for Mumbo, Bdubs, Tango, Xb, Cub, Zedaph (elije) and Pearl (CG-D). I've linked the post here.

so i tried to tokipona-fy the names of the hermits

⚠️I am still a beginner in toki pona, so if anything here violates the language/phonics rules, IM SORRY I tried⚠️

Under the cut is a brief explanation of toki pona and how the words and letters are pronounced, and reblogged after it is a list I've made (with some credited help) of each hermit, their tokipona-fied name, their combined sign, and an explanation of why I chose what I chose.

For those of you who don't know what toki pona is, it's a minimalist language with only 120 official words and ~135 widespread words. It's got only 14 letters and 14 phonemes (sounds). For comparison, the english language has roughly 1 million words, 26 letters, and 44 phonemes.

Toki pona does not have the english letters b, c, d, f, g, h, q, r, v, x, y, or z. You may now be realizing how difficult (impossible) it would be to mimic a name like Bdubs in this language. Not only do B and D not exist in toki pona, but the U here makes the "uh" sound, a sound that ALSO isnt in toki pona.

Each letter in toki pona makes one, and only one, sound. J is pronounced like english Y as in "yikes". A is pronounced like "fAr", E is pronounced like "bEt", I sounds like "whEEE!" (or according to some like "bIt"), O is pronounced like "Or", and U is pronounced like "mOOn".

In addition, there's several specific phonics rules for toki pona. You can't end any syllable with a consonant other than N (although vowels are allowed) and the phonomes Wu, Wo, Ji, and Ti are illegal.

Toki pona uses 14 latin letters (a,e,i,j,k,l,m,n,o,p,s,t,u,w), but it also has a separate glyphic form called sitelen pona.

For each hermit, I'm going to give their tokipona-fied name, a combined glyph, the name of the words in the glyph, a meaning for those words, and then an explanation for Everything.

[themightywolftiger]

Hermit’s Islands AU

Okay, so, I’m still trying to get Pokéwhat together. So, in the meantime, I’ll ramble about some little ideas.

For starters, there’s this idea that puts the hermits into Poptropica (child brain go brrr).  

The story essentially covers a hermit as they loosely follow the plot of the island. There’s roughly 4/4.5 parts/arcs to it with three-ish islands together. Each follow three hermits as they try to find anyone.

 Some of them are in duos already because I say so. This AU is roughly set within season 8 going into 9?

Cleo: Counterfeit

Joe: Cryptid

Gem: Twisted Thicket

--

Impulse: 24 Carrot

Pearl/Tango: Lunar Colony

Wels: Astro Knights

--

Mumbo: Shrink Ray

Ren: Ghost Story

Grian: Monster Carnival

--

Scar: Wild West

Etho/Bdubs: Survival

--

X/Void (my version of EX): Mocktropica

[writing-the-end]

LoL Chapter 55- Hell’s Chosen

Masterpost

A Wizard Hermits tale (AU, designs, ideas belongs to @theguardiansofredland)

The hermits discover a dark past to their paladin knight, does this change their perspective of him, or will it save their unlikely ally? 

Warning: Some description of wounds (i think)

________________________________

All eyes were on Wels. Very few had a look of knowledge. TFC, for one. But Tango’s visible confusion gives way to a much softer, quieter version of the hellfire wizard. “Helsknight? You mean the marauder from years ago? But he died.” 

“You’re right, he did. And I killed him. I buried him so deep inside me, and vowed to do whatever I could to be a better man. When Helsknight died, Welsknight was born.” Wels’s fingers are tight in the bloodstained fabric, knuckles turned white as he’s forced to relive, to speak of his dark past. 

“No no no no. You’re joking, right?” Doc shakes his head. Even he feared Hell’s chosen knight. Wels can’t possibly be that same person. Wels, a quiet, collected paladin with the heart of gold and courage of a lion. “I mean...no one ever told the story of Helsknight with a tail.” 

“Less limbs to get cut off if it’s protected by armor.” Wels points out, flicking the lionesque tail. “You want proof? What was the last time anyone ever saw Helsknight?”

Doc cocks an eyebrow, then waves his hand. “Hels and his band of bad guys attacked one of Ventus’s- the God of Judgement- temples. But the attempt was failed, and Helsknight himself was left behind as he bled out...from his neck…”

The entire group stares as the scar that Wels reveals, running from his collar to his clavicle. TFC doesn’t stare like the others. He’s known all of this the whole time. Tango shakes his head. “But you’re nothing like Helsknight. He murdered and killed for fun, to cause chaos and bring hell onto Lairyon. Wels, you’re…” 

“A changed man. Just like Apatia can be- if you give him the chance. Like the woman who healed me did, like X and TFC. Tango, if you don’t let Apatia give his chance to change and rectify what he can, then you can’t let me be any different. You can’t be a hypocrite and pick and choose.” From between Wels and Tango, Apatia groans. The blood has stopped, Ren’s work healing leaving a sloppy open wound behind. 

Apatia was pale, paler than he already was. Almost the same color as Grian, as the latter continues to recuperate from the torture he faced. But unlike Grian’s shallow, soft breaths, Apatia’s runs ragged and harsh. His jaws are clenched, fighting off the pain. With the remaining bandages and healing salve, Wels wraps up the stump of Apatia’s tail fin. 

Tango and Doc are still quiet, trying to comprehend the news that’s been delivered to them. It all makes sense, but their eads still struggle to put the two completely different personas together. As if they’re different people all together. 

Everyone knows who Helsknight is- was. He appeared as if from nowhere, like a demon spawned straight from hell. And immediately, he began reeking havoc. His band of villains attacked and raided. They were more than just some lowly bandits, or even a mafia. Helsknight was a villain, killing without mercy, without remorse, and without discretion. It wasn’t until their botched attack on that temple that ended the reign of terror that Hell’s chosen knight left on Lairyon. Just as quickly as Helsknight appeared, he faded into nightmares and horror story. Kids were told to watch out for the knight with one eye, because he’d pluck out their own to replace his. 

But Welsknight? He’s calm and collected, if a bit snarky. Even when battling even the husks, he always hesitates to strike a killing blow if there’s a potential to save the life instead. Wels is jovial, and a great baker, and tells great stories. Sure, he’s a great knight, but Tango once saw Wels cry over a dead fish he found at the beach. He’s a paladin, not a barbarian. 

Helsknight supposedly died years ago. Welsknight joined the hermits a few years back. Though there’s a span of time in between the day Lairyon celebrated the defeat of Hels and Wels following TFC back to Eremita, it begins to all make sense. There's a reason why Wels never talks about his past. Never visits home. Never explains how he got many of his scars.

Like puzzle pieces, it all falls together and paints a picture. Doc’s jaw clenches. As much as he hates to say it, or even think it, Wels is right. If a monster like Hels can become the man before Doc today, then maybe, just maybe , theres hope for Apatia. 

So long as he lives. The hermits are so focused on Apatia, their argument on whether he should live or die, no one notices Grian rouse from the darkness that still grips him. No one noticed the sky open up, both in Grian’s eyes and the sky beyond the windows. No one notices him weakly clamber out of bed, nearly falling flat on his face, and walking over to join them in the group. 

“What are we on about?” Even when he speaks up, the other hermits are so used to his voice that it hardly registers. 

“Welsknight was once helsknight, and whether we should save Apatia’s life or not.” Tango shrugs, his red eyes glaring down at Apatia with distaste. He still hates the man, but at the same time… they’re supposed to be the heroes. 

“As your resident healer, I think we should. But...I’m not sure why he’s here in the first place.” Ren looks up, realizing who is speaking, and scoops Grian into his arms. His tail wags loud and heavy, banging against the other hermits with every oscillation. 

“Welcome back to the land of the living, my dude!” Ren only sets Grian down when TFC reminds him that Grian is still working towards regaining his life, his color. He’s still slightly unsaturated, his skin missing the tint of pink, the red of his robest boarding the color of dried blood. Ren sets Grian back on the bed, trying to force the angel to rest. But now that Grian’s awake, he’s ready to cause trouble and start his day- even though he has no clue what time it is. 

“What’s going on? I...I don’t remember much. When did you guys save me? Why is Apatia here? How did you find me?” The questions fall like rain in a storm, impossible for the hermits to catch every last drop. 

It’s TFC that manages to slow the downpour. “Hold on, hold on Grian. Why don’t we start from the beginning? We’ll fill you in on everything, in time.”

----------------------------------------------------

All the hermits, once again under the safe canopy of the massive oak tree in their guild hall. Grian is wrapped in a warm, soft blanket- knitted by Stress- and a mug of warm apple cider rests in between his pale hands. “I can’t believe you guys came for me.” 

“Of course we were gonna save you, Grian.” Scar practically laughs at the mere idea of leaving him behind. But for Grian, who’s been kicked out of so many guilds for his troublemaking, it really shows how much they care. 

A rumble of agreements follow, and after a few more minutes of quiet comforting, it’s Grian himself that changes the subject. “Dolios is getting more powerful by the minute. I could feel all the energy flowing through those leylines, into him and that monster, Eurynomos. We can’t delay this any longer. Dolios has to go down.” 

“But we don’t even know how. We can destroy as many crystals as we want, but he’ll just keep making more. He has more power than a bunch of lowly mercenaries. He even beat Apatia, one of his own Councilmembers. One of the strongest guildmasters in all of Lairyon.” BDubs points out. Everyone goes silent as they remember the man in their infirmary. The stranger- he’s not a hermit, yet he’s among them. 

Grian looks up, pale face and hollowed eyes alarming for the hermits. He hardly looks to be among the living, but less like a dead man walking like he was before. “Xisuma, your brother mentioned something about the ancient ones. DO you think there could be a clue for us there? In the past?” 

X sighs, leaning back in his chair as he considers the question. “If the answer to ending Dolios’s dark reign truly lies in the past, then we’d have better luck finding the answer ourselves. Thousands of years, eroded by time, by kingdoms and cultures rising and falling, not to mention the disappearance of the ancient ones. There’s a reason ancient magic is dead- because none of the books teaching it survived.” 

“There’s one person we know who has studied the ancient ones for years.” Joe’s voice cuts through the crowd, looking around. Every other hermit is lost and confused, but Joe can see the mixed emotions raging in Xisuma’s eyes. “Besides Ex can take care of the island, of Apatia while we’re searching.” 

“Ex chose to leave Eremita. Why in gods’s names would he want to come back, to help us?” X growls. 

“Because he’s your brother. He helped us save Doc. He’s been helping us, helping all of Lairyon- in his own weird, Ex way. He’s not the villain here, he’s your brother.” 

X clenches his jaw. The scar over his eye burns at the memory of their fight. The words he said to his brother, and the worst responded in kind. Xisuma still received letters from Ex, but he only opened them when Cleo’s cider had clouded his better judgement. And he never responded. 

But he also remembers the moment, after years estranged, he laid eyes upon his twin brother, crammed into the bookstore he was running. The moment of relief, of happiness to see Ex alive and well. Their identical faces, like mirror images of one another. His hair pure white, like the bright sun in the sky. Even now Xisuma remembers how often he’d complain he could always find Ex hairs on his clothes. 

And that Ex helped them save Doc. All these years fighting, Xisuma can’t believe he’s going to be the one to concede defeat. But for the fate of Lairyon, he guesses he has to. He pulls off his mask, turning it over in his hands, running a thumb over the scratched out symbol. He swallows his pride, and stands. “I’ll get the letter to Phoebe. What’s one more stranger to the island?”

[thelionbyname]

Prequel part 1

(This is a prequel to “The Pole, The American And The Four Brits” and all the hermits have superpowers I guess... Tell me what you think and if I should continue this story. Anyway, enjoy!)

The fancy room was filling up fast. More and more people were arriving, and, though the room was the size of a ball room, -because that’s exactly what it was- it was difficult to see through the crowd to the other side of the room. It was rather noisy, too. There was a seemingly random combination of accents bouncing around. Canadian, Swedish, German. But most dominant were British and American. The American, of course, came in many different forms. There were the smooth Tennessee sounds, the less refined Arizona pronunciation. There was a mix of other, less obvious dialects too. All around, in many different tongues, people chatted with each other, catching up, having fun.

A trio of men were standing at a high table, champagne in hand. The Britt of the group said, “So, Tango, what is your new year’s resolution?”

“I want to teach everyone here how to block their minds from telepaths like Cleo and I. It gives you all a bit of privacy,” a blonde American answered, apparently named Tango.

“How about you, Impulse?” The Britt asked the third person at their table, a handsome brunette, who answered with a voice in which you can always hear the smile.

“I honestly don’t know, Zed. I was hoping you guys could give me some inspiration.”

Another British voice boomed through the speakers all around, interrupting their conversation. “Good evening Hermits! Welcome to the party of the century. It’s probably also the last party of the century, because tonight, we enter the year 2000!”

Somebody shouted, “Whooo! X!” and cheers erupted from the crowd. 

“That’s my cue,” Impulse said mischievously, surprising Zedaph, but not Tango, who heard Impulse’s intentions in his thoughts. They grinned at each other.

“What? What am I missing?” Zed asked.

“You’ll see,” Impulse answered, setting his champagne down on the table and walking over to a makeshift stage on the other side of the room. Three other people were already there. Although “people” may be a bit of a stretch. There were two people, and one maroon-coloured wolf. As Impulse approached the stage, the large wolf’s fur rippled, and it morphed into a man in a red shirt and jeans, with long maroon hair pulled back into a ponytail. His hair was the same shade as his wolf counterpart’s.

“Hey Ren!” Impulse greets him, not at all surprised by the transformation that had just taken place before his eyes.

“Hi Impulse! Long time no see,” Ren responded. They embrace each other and turn to the other two on the stage.

The one who had been speaking through the microphone before, X, was a tall, kind-looking man with an air of authority. He stood facing a man clad in iron armor. The latter gazed through his helmet with a pair of bright blue eyes. The knight noticed Impulse and Ren looking at him, and smiled at them.

“Hey guys! Happy almost new year!” he said enthusiastically. He took off his helmet and wedged it under his arm. The polished metal gleamed as the light found it, shining into X’s eyes and temporarily blinding him. “Oh, sorry Xisuma” The knight said quickly, switching his helmet to his other arm.

“That’s all right, Wels,” Xisuma responded, looking at him through the vague pink spots in his vision. “Anyway, enough hanging around, let’s get this party started! Wels, if you will.”

Wels, seeming to know what Xisuma meant, nodded and disappeared. A second later, he reappeared at the back of the stage with a large drum set. He then disappeared again and reappeared in front of Xisuma, holding two electric guitars and handing one to Ren and one to Xisuma. Neither of them so much as flinched as Wels popped in and out of existence. They accepted the guitars without question and headed to the middle of the stage together. 

Impulse walked over to the drum set, trying to hide his nerves, but jittering inside. Several people were looking at them now, and as Impulse watched, understanding and excitement transformed their features. Tango and Zedaph had made their way to the front of the crowd, and Zedaph seemed to finally be back in the loop. His teeth were bared in an encouraging grin as he caught Impulse’s eye. That helped. Impulse’s heart rate slowed a bit, and he managed to smile back. More confident now, he marched over to the back of the stage and took a seat on the drum throne.

The music that suddenly bounced around the room was deafening. Wels’ voice broke through the anticipation and thrummed right to everyone’s hearts. Impulse’s arms crossed in all sorts of directions as the drumsticks in his hands danced across the batters. And Xisuma and Ren had their fingers waltzing between snares, sending constant thrills through the air.

And people danced.

A trio, one with a very noticeable black moustache, one with a robotic eye and one with dirty blond hair, spun around in circles whilst holding hands. Plenty of duos danced around them. One of the only three girls laughed as she was being pulled into a dance with a smiling man wearing glasses, with a big @ sign on his shirt. The other two girls were already swaying to the beat, their hair bouncing around their shoulders. 

But suddenly, through the laughter, through the music, through the conversations, came screams. First one, then two, then a dozen. The hermits abruptly went quiet, listening anxiously. Everything went pitch black.

[hermits-that-craft]

Forgetting and Leaving - Part Three

This is the final part to the short story! It’s been a wild ride :D - this part is 4747 words long (perfect planning lol). Once again : Stuck au is owned by the wonderful @target-block! Go check them out!

before i forget again: this is not cannon to ray’s au!

Wels’ dreams weren’t all that different. Sleeping for months will do that to a person, and though Wels’ doesn’t entirely mind the repetitive dreams, the knight has to admit that they’re getting old. Not that he’d ever complain - he came to an agreement with Cub after the first month that they could swap at any time. No, Wels waves goodbye to Cub, letting the man think that his dreams aren’t predictable, letting him leave Wels alone in season six again. He isn’t mad, he offered this to Xisuma, to the hermits. He knows that this power of his is the only thing that he can trust in this empty world, so as he walks back to his base he lets his mind wander to what Cub told him about season seven. How is Iskall going to collect the amount of leaves he’s going to need for the tree? How will Cub make the inside of the pyramid? Are Etho, Beef, xB and Hypno adapting well to the change? Did the other hermits tell them why they moved to season seven?

Cub wouldn’t answer his questions about it, so Wels assumes that he doesn’t know.

He worries for Doc and Scar. Cub didn’t have to say it, but Wels knows that they blame themselves. Of course they do - even though no one blames them. It’s in the twos nature. Wels is glad that Scar chose a place with a lot of hermits, and he’s even more glad that Doc has Bdubs, even if Cub says that they have been fighting. Doc needs someone with him, to remind him that it isn't his fault.

Wels finds his bed, sinking down into the soft bed sheets. He knows that he could spend the month elsewhere, in someone else's base, all he would have to do is leave a sign. He doesn't. Wels lets himself fall into the bed, the same dreams repeating in his head.

---

Evil Xisuma yelps as the gravel blocks update halfway through his walk. They should have updates minutes ago, sending him down into the cave when he first arrived at the edge of the gravel. His body screams and he pulls out a healing potion, taking a swig.

"You alright Ex?" Impulse - Orchid, now - calls down to him.

"Peachy." Ex lies, struggling to stand up. Orchid glides down to him, hitting the floor hard. "You alright?"

"This world has started to glitch too." Orchid, Impulse, whatever, mumbles to himself. "Why can't we ever find a world that isn't glitched?"

"I'm sure you will, eventually." Evil Xisuma says, "It'll be lonely here without you."

"What? We're going to go to the next update, not a different smp. Sorry Ex, you've been with us for years now. You're stuck with us." Grian, Rose, Poultry Man smirks. "We're not leaving you behind."

"I'm not allowed to go to the next update." Ex says plainly. Ren/Daisy offers him a hand, helping him up. Glowing white eyes stare at them from the edge of the cave. "I've told you a million times - I can't go through the update."

"I could help you go through. I won't be able to meet you all in that world, though." Herobrine says. "I can meet you all in the next one though."

"Why? Why can't you meet us in the next world?" Daisy frowns.

"Don't worry about it." Herobrine gives Evil Xisuma a knowing smile, as though he knows exactly why Evil Xisuma can't go to season six. "I'm sure you'll find more people in the update."

Evil Xisuma pales, panic seizing his throat. Xisuma doesn't want him back, that much is clear. Why would Herobrine send him back if he knew that?

---

Scar sits on the top of Larry, acutely aware of Xisuma watching him in the distance. He's tired of being watched, but there isn't much he can do to stop Xisuma from doing that. It'll only make Xisuma think that he's planning something.

So Scar watches the sunset, letting his body relax, letting him look tired from behind but not so tired that it's clear he's faking it. Scar's gotten better at lying, or maybe Xisuma has gotten worse at telling the difference, because as Scar stands and yawns Xisuma doesn't do anything. Scar turns, seeing Xisuma on the top of one of his trees.

Caught red handed.

Scar grins, waving at Xisuma, who flies down to Scar. Xisuma lands, nearly falling off of Larry. Scar helps him up, and he notices how tired Xisuma looks. Scar knows that he can't look better, but it's still worrying.

"Did you come for a reason or are you just admiring my build?" Scar asks playfully, ignoring the invasion of privacy, the bags under Xisuma's eyes.

"Oh, uh." Xisuma struggles to come up with a decent answer, and Scar sighs.

"Long day? I know my side of the jungle is relaxing, you should take some of the magical crystals I made - free of charge. Get some rest, X." Scar feels performative, like he's lying to the admin.

"You look like you need sleep as well." Xisuma dodges the request.

"You have a spare inventory in your eye bags. Go sleep," Scar takes a breath in, the humid night air doing nothing to calm his nerves. "You can't be a good admin if you're going to fall over constantly."

Xisuma blinks, his shoulders slumping. "I didn't think you could notice."

"X, if you say that Doc and I shouldn't blame ourselves for the hippies disappearing, then you shouldn't blame yourself." Scar takes Xisuma's hands in his own. "Let yourself rest, or you'll end up under constant watch as well. Trust me, it isn't fun."

Xisuma frowns, his mouth opening and closing under the mask before he nods, taking off into the skies.

Scar will have to work fast to get out, before Cub arrives to make sure he's asleep.

---

Orchid watches as Daisy and Rose make last minute preparations before they leave. Daisy looks upset at the idea of leaving the netherboard base, though he still doesn't understand how Daisy knew what the netherboard is. Orchid watches as Ex lands with Herobrine, a look of fear on his face as the cryptid tells him about what will happen as they cross the barrier. Orchid doubts that Ex has never gone through an update, but he doesn't blame Herobrine for going over the exact method that Ex would be traveling, given just how panicked the poor man looks. 

Daisy and Rose leave the building, smiling at Orchid, who just sighs.

"Maybe the next world will be nearly abandoned as well so you don't have to go mining, Orchid." Rose suggests, making Orchid smile. 

"Maybe you'll know how to work the farms too!" He suggests to Daisy, who gives Orchid a sad smile.

"I don't want to leave here. I'm not sure why. It feels," Daisy struggles for a word, "like home. Like I've been here before."

"I know." Orchid nods as Ex leads them towards the end portal, still talking to Herobrine about something. The two men seem almost nervous about letting the Hippies know what is being said.

The hippies?

Where did Orchid hear that before? Who told him that? Why does he remember someone calling them that? Why can't he remember what they sounded like? Why can he only think 'green' when he tries to remember them? 

"Orchid?" Daisy asks, his hand on Orchid's back. Orchid clutches his head in his hands, pain blooming behind his eyes, a wither rose against his forehead. "Orchid!"

"Ren?" Orchid - Impulse? - Orchid mumbles. "It hurts."

"Orchid, take some deep breaths in, does anyone have a regen potion?" Grian - Rose - G̷ria̷n̕R̢os̵e calls out. Orchid tries to take some breaths in, tries to breath. It hurts, it hurts so much. Someone strong picks him up and begins to walk, something is pressed against his lips.

Something makes him black out.

---

Stress paces around her base, Bdubs and Cub standing nervously in her door frame. She had truly believed that Scar and Doc were making progress, that they hadn't been bottling up their emotions like - like before. She will have to sit down and talk to the two men once they get them back, but it's clear that isn't the main problem there.

"Hey guys." False says plainly, landing in the skull. Cleo exits Stress' portal, waving at the group. "I guess we're finding the area 77 boys again?"

"We can't lose more people to time travel."

"Where's Xisuma?" Cleo asks, looking around the room. "Please tell me someone got Xisuma."

"He's coming." Cub says. "I told Keralis, we've been trying to get a hold of X for too long."

"Too long?"

"A minute." Bdubs says plainly. "A minute too long - We need to go looking for them now, before they do something stupid."

"Are we late? Shishwammy was asleep." Keralis' voice echoes around the room as he and Xisuma walk towards the group.

"Sorry guys, Scar said that I looked tired." Xisuma rubs the back of his neck, his helmet under his arm. The bags under his eyes go on for seemingly miles. Xisuma looks dead, like a breeze would send him flying.

"He isn't wrong. You need to shleep." Bdubs smiles, though there's clear sadness and guilt in his eyes.

Stress takes a deep breath in, turning to face the wall. She has to come up with a plan, and soon. A hand touches her shoulder gently and she nearly jumps out of her skin, looking up at Cleo. The zombie smiles at Stress, who blinks back tears. A plan. Planning. Stress is smart - surely she can think of something.

"Xisuma, can you find their coordinates?" Stress asks, not looking away from Cleo, who smiles at Stress.

"I can do you one better - I can teleport us there."

---

"Is he going to be alright?" Rose asks Herobrine as they run to the portal, glitching blocks serve as the only things left that proves that they were even there to begin with.

"Of course, Orchid is very resilient." Herobrine says, standing on the edge of the end portal. Rose freezes, trying to calm his breathing. "Are you alright Rose?" 

"Fine. We need to go now." Rose swallows, but he makes no effort to cross into the end. Daisy sighs, pushing Rose and Ex into the portal. Herobrine sends him a slight glare and Daisy smiles brightly.

"It made them go, didn't it?"

Herobrine laughs, pushing Daisy into the portal before jumping in with Orchid.

---

Scar and Doc sit, talking around a campfire. Doc throws some quartz into the fire occasionally, listening to Scar as the short man explains his plans for a mega base.

"I'm worried about it being too much, you know?" Scar says, finally relaxed. No one is watching him from a distance, just Doc. "I mean, it is a giant drill."

"That could work in your favour though," Doc points out helpfully, drawing the drill into the dirt. "You could fit a lot of farms into there, it'd keep you busy, and it would show up well on a map. Very clear and obvious."

"Still, I do like working on a block by block radius. I mean, detailing is easy in the micro, macro detailing can get repetitive." Scar frowns. "I don't want anything to look like I've just copied one side to the other."

"But, on the other hand, you are going for an industrial feel. A side could go undetailed."

"I want a divorce. I can't believe you would say something like that!" Scar throws a marshmallow at Doc, hitting him in the face. Doc gasps, catching the marshmallow before popping it in his mouth.

"Do you think that you could get the marshmallow into my mouth?" Doc asks, smiling at Scar.

"I bet I can!" Scar boasts, throwing a new marshmallow at Doc. Doc opens his mouth, diving to catch the marshmallow. He catches it, landing on his side. The two men burst out laughing, Scar clutching his sides as he looks at Doc. Doc lies on the ground, trying to save face with a victorious look, which only spurs on Scar's laughter.

The laughter doesn't last long, a branch snapping in the distance. Despite the calmness of the Taiga forest so far, Doc steps in front of Scar, his sword out and ready to fight any mobs that come their way. Doc doesn't even notice the protective stance, though Scar does, and Scar rolls his eyes, standing up himself. He turns towards the noise, his sword out.

Two people stand, hidden poorly in the bushes. Blonde and orange hair making them stand out against the dark forest. Scar frowns, poking Doc's side and pointing towards the two women. False and Cleo stand out in the forest like concrete in a rustic build. 

"False, Cleo, you two can come out." Scar yells, rolling his eyes. "You aren't slick, it's obvious that you're here."

The two women jump up, surprise written across their faces. False has her sword out, an angry look in her eyes. Cleo's eyes only tell surprise, though Scar can't tell if she's genuinely surprised or just hiding it well.

"Did you think that we wouldn't notice? Can't have five minutes privacy on the hermitcraft server to talk to a friend." Scar doesn't understand why he's so mad, why he's decided now is the time to say something about it. Cleo and False aren't even the people who normally stalk him and Doc, but Scar can't stop the train of anger that he set off. "We aren't fools, we know that if we go to find them we'll be stuck there. Stop treating us like we're stupid."

"Scar," Doc warns him, sending Scar a confused look. "False and Cleo aren't-"

"They were hiding in the bushes, Doc. They were sent here. It's obvious. The hermits don't trust us." Scar sends False and Cleo a look that pins the two girls down. Ignored Vex magic screams. "Why else would they be here."

"Scar, calm down." Doc commands, his hand on Scar's arm. "It's not their fault."

Scar rips his arm out of Doc's hand and takes some rockets out of his inventory, taking off into the night air without another word. Doc is right, of course, but Xisuma, Bdubs, Stress and Keralis suddenly being in the small clearing that he and Doc had cleared only serves to make Scar more angry.

He spent so much time spawn proofing the area. Xisuma is sure to rip it out now.

---

The sleeping man doesn't stir. Not as four new people arrive on his server. Not as the people cry as they struggle to remember where they are, what the place that seems so familiar is called. Why it is familiar. No, the sleeping knight doesn't stir, not even as the evil version of one of his closest friends leads the three men towards the shopping district. He doesn't stir as the winged man struggles to explain the playful, joking hatred he has towards concorp. He doesn't stir as the man with short brown hair checks a bookstore called I-trade for money. No, the knight doesn't even stir as the werewolf breaks down in front of the stock exchange, unable to know the sense of mourning that he has for the building. It's been four years.

The sleeping man doesn't rouse, not as the lost hippies and the evil clone make their way towards hermitville, their sense screaming that it is necessary, though they don't know why. The knight turns onto his back, but he doesn't move as the lost ones exit the portal. His breathing deepens as they walk towards his castle. He doesn't wake as they find him, sleeping like the dead. He doesn't rouse as they scream. He doesn't feel the werewolf's hands on his shoulders, trying to shake him awake. He doesn't stir as the ex watcher tries to use magic to find his name.

His eyes blink awake as Evil Xisuma asks him to wake up, using his name.

---

Rose jumps back as the sleeping knight throws his arms around Daisy, sobbing into the man's shoulder. Daisy wraps himself into the hug, sobbing onto the knight's shoulder.

"You're back. You're all back, you came back." The knight says, and something clicks in Rose's - No. Something clicks in Grian's mind. Memories come back in waves, washing over Grian. Tears slip down his face as Wels pulls him into a hug, holding him and Impulse and Ren. Wels wipes the tears from Grian's eyes before pulling him into a tight hug, chanting 'you came back' over and over.

It's too good to be true.

Grian is home.

"Where is Tango?" Impulse suddenly gasps. "Zedaph? Where are they? They must be so worried I can't believe I forgot them!"

"You forgot?"

"I, uh," Impulse frowns, racking his brain to find the memory. It's one that he remembered before Wels woke up, but it's buried itself under the newly unlocked memories. "I might have killed a watcher who cursed us on their dying breath."

"IMPULSE!" Wels snaps, looking at said man with a wide grin. "That's the best thing I've ever heard."

"How did the curse break then?" Ren mumbles, wiping his face with the palm of his hand. "They said that we'd never remember."

"Herobrine said that you all would remember once Wels woke up." Evil Xisuma, Ex, says gently. "I guess it's my time to go now."

"No." Ren says, taking Evil Xisuma's hand. "You're stuck with us. You don't get to leave now, you're stuck with us and Xisuma can deal with it. You're a hippie bro now."

"Bring it in Evil X." Wels says, offering a hug to the clone. "I'll message Cub in the morning, then we can all go to the next season. But you have to explain Herobrine to me."

"Oh he's my Dad."

"Impulse you can't just say things like that."

---

Cub lands behind Scar, who sits on the edge of a cliff overlooking the hermiatic sea. Scar clearly notices the man, his body tensing and his shoulders shaking, but he doesn't move to say anything.

"Scar," Cub takes a deep breath in, not knowing where to start. "You should have told us, we could have-"

"Save your breath." Scar mumbles, standing. "You wouldn't have changed anything. You aren't going to change anything. Just, just take me to your base or wherever Xisuma wants me. I want this day to be over."

“Scar,” Cub takes Scar’s hand, stopping the shorter hermit from walking any further. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry for not trusting you, I’m sorry for treating you and Doc like glass. We shouldn’t have, I shouldn’t have. You’re my best friend, I should have trusted you more.”

Scar turns to Cub, and Cub finally sees Scar’s face. Tear’s stain his cheeks and his eyes hold no anger, just tired acceptance. Scar pulls Cub into a hug, and the two vex men hold onto each other until the sun rises, apologising and talking, telling each other how they feel. Cub falls asleep at some point, still holding onto Scar.

“Now, as much as this is a sight for sore eyes.” Joe says, a dog licking Cub’s face until he wakes up. “I’d rather you two didn’t fall asleep where I want to put my lighthouse.”

Scar rubs his eyes, sitting up. Cub checks his communicator, not expecting anything other than a few angry messages from some very worried hermits.

Welsknight: Cub, I need you back ASAP Welsknight: They’re back.

“The hippies have woken up Wels.” Cub mumbles, a wide grin on his face. “Wels has the hippies!”

Scar’s face goes slack before he also grins, taking the communicator from Cub’s hands. Joe and Scar read the messages before Scar jumps up, whooping in joy, falling off the cliff and into the ocean.

“Go get them, Cub.” Joe says, pushing Cub’s back. “Go get the hippies back.”

---

Grian doesn’t know why he’s so nervous. It’s just Cub, and Wels did explain everything to them last night. Ex seems about as nervous as Grian is, not expecting to be accepted as quickly as the Hippies will be. It’s been four years. It’s painful to stay here.

But he wants to. There are so many things that have been left unfinished.

They won’t come back to season 6. Grian never wants to looks at a quartz block again.

"We have to go to the netherhub." Wels says, gently touching Grian's back. "You alright?"

"There's so much we didn't finish." Grian mumbles, pulling his brown sweater closer to him. "This wasn't supposed to happen, we were supposed to come back."

"It's not your fault." Ren says, smiling sadly. "We're going back home now."

"But here is home." 

"No, home is where we are." Impulse pushes Grian's side, ruffling the hippie's hair. "Home is where the hermits are."

"Yeah." Grian smiles wistfully. "I'm going to prank Mumbo and Iskall. I'll fill their bases with flowers and chickens."

"I'll set up a base close to Doc. Keep an eye on him." Ren smiles. "I can't wait to see him again."

"Speak for yourselves, Tango and Zed aren't going to let me set up a base unless they can see it." Despite Impulse's words, he sounds happy, as though he can't wait for that to happen.

"How about you, Ex?" Grian asks, turning to the clone. "What are you going to do?"

"Apologise to Xisuma and then find somewhere to live, I guess." Ex smiles. "Away from flowers, I hate flowers."

"Why do you hate flowers?" Wels asks, smiling quietly.

"He's scared of them."

"Impulse please stop." Ex groans. "You can't keep saying things, I can never leave this place. You've killed me, I'm dead."

"Good."

"Impulse!" Wels protests, pushing the man. "Stop it, he's going to end up looking like a tomato."

"Ha, sucked in Exy!" Grian laughs as they follow Wels through the portal. The heat of the nether doesn't stop the group from joking, Grian and Ren pushing Impulse around while Wels and Evil Xisuma lead the group forward. They all glide down to the giant map, Impulse pushing Grian off the ledge as Cub exits the main portal.

He doesn't look real, not to Grian. Three of the four years that the hippies were missing he didn't remember Cub, and of the first year he was more focused on survival than he was on the hermits that they accidentally left behind. But Cub is here, his beard sporting a few white strands of hair, and his face has worry lines where there was uncreased skin before. He's lost his usual scientist get up, a gaudy pharaoh's outfit adorning his skin, and his more tan than he was before they were lost. But he's here, Cub is taking them home.

Tears roll down Cub's face as he approaches, gently tapping the hippies as though he can't believe that they're back. He steps back, looking over to Wels and Evil Xisuma with a gleeful look on his face before Grian wraps him into a hug. He smells like sand and ocean and grass and home, and tears spring to Grian’s eyes. Impulse and Ren wrap themselves around Cub and Grian, joining in the hug. Wels joins the hug as Impulse pulls Evil Xisuma into the hug as well. 

They’re going home.

---

The hermits stand nervously around spawn, shuffling on their feet. No one was prepared for Cub to leave in the morning, and besides from Joe and Scar, no one knows why he left. Joe called a meeting - Mandatory, emergency : You Must Not Miss This type meeting, though he refuses to say anything about why he called it.

The meeting did give Xisuma, Stress, Bdubs, False and Cleo enough time to apologise to Scar, though Joe had to force it out of them. Scar and Joe stand apart, hopeful smiles written on their faces. The sun ducks behind a cloud as Scar whispers the reason the meeting was called into Doc’s ear, and Doc picks Scar up, swinging him into a hug. No one is told why they are so happy, though Joe’s hopeful grin turns into a large smile.

Cubfan135 joined the server Welsknight joined the server Grian joined the server ImpulseSV joined the server Rendog joined the server EvilXisuma joined the server

---

Mumbo stares at Grian, noticing all the small differences between Past Grian and Current Grian. His hair is longer, his eyes are tired, he looks the same but different, freckles and tans and small cuts litter his face. There’s a burn on his lower hand, hidden under the sleeves of his coat. His coat is brown, and he’s wearing a black t shirt under it. There’s a rose around his wrist.

But the way that he smiles, the way he stands. That’s Grian, that’s his best friend.

Mumbo pulls Grian into a hug, barely able to form words. He notices Iskall, hugging Grian tight as well. They’re safe. They’re back. Grian’s back.

---

Doc puts Scar down, walking over to Ren with an incredulous look on his face. Ren’s hair is long, tied back in a ponytail, with a blue dress shirt on and a daisy around his wrist. There’s stubble on his face and grass stains on his knees.

“I’m not asleep, am I?” Doc asks, breathlessly. He can barely contain the tears that make one of his eyes go blurry. “I better not be dreaming.”

“You aren’t.” Ren punches Doc’s side lightly. “I wouldn’t let you.”

Doc breaks down, crying into Ren’s shoulder as they hug. He knows this isn’t a dream, even if it feels too good to be true. Ren is back, Ren is safe, and he isn’t going to let Ren go until Ren wants out of the hug. He can’t wait to show the werewolf around.

---

“I’m asleep again.” Zedaph mumbles. “I’m asleep and dreaming and I’m going to wake up and Tango will ask if I’m crying.”

“Zed,” Impulse has tears in his eyes. He’s got a black sleeveless shirt on with a brown vest, and a sword lays on his side. He’s a lot more buff, stubble rests where he is normally clean shaven. “Zed I swear, this isn’t a dream.”

“I know,” Tango’s breathless, holding out something to Impulse. “It can’t be a dream, because you have an orchid where you’re meant to have this bracelet.”

Impulse breaks down, falling on his knees as he cries. Zedaph and Tango wrap him into a hug, letting him release the tears that he clearly needed to. The three men hold each other, not letting go. Not even to eat when Joe brings food at lunch, nor when Stress brings soup at dinner. A point of contact remains as they eat and the three men fall asleep at spawn, tangled together. They don’t want to wake up separated.

---

“I’ll leave now.” Evil Xisuma mumbles, shifting uncomfortably as Xisuma watches him. “I know I’ve overstayed my welcome.”

“You haven’t.” Wels brushes off Evil Xisuma’s comments. “You’re the one who brought them back. You’re the one who woke me up. You’re the one who broke their curse. Like Grian said: You’re stuck with us now.”

“Curse?” Xisuma says, frowning. “What curse?”

“Impulse killed a Watcher and was cursed to never remember what's important, and the other hippies got the curse as well.” Evil Xisuma mumbles, careful not to let the other hermits hear. The sun sets and though most of the hermits had left, the hippies and their friends had remained at spawn. Scar and Cub also had stayed, Scar apologising to the hippies for more reasons than any had cared to count. “They didn’t even remember their names when I found them.”

“Thank you.” Xisuma says, smiling. “Thank you for taking care of them.”

“It wasn’t just me!” Evil Xisuma raises his hands. “Impulse got adopted by Herobrine!”

“I never said I was adopted!”

“Impulse I will take away your rights to say things again!” Grian smiles as he looks up from the pictures of Mumbo and Iskall’s megabases.

“Yeah man can we have a nice moment.” Ren laughs, watching the stars with Doc. Tango and Zedaph laugh, cooking marshmallows over an open fire.

“Don’t take his speaking rights away, he still hasn’t told us about his family reunion with his Dad.” Tango laughs, picking up a marshmallow and popping it into his mouth. Xisuma smiles, watching the group.

His family is together again.

[scp-10000]

Another Hermit DnD au

Now I know there are a few DnD aus on here, but this is in reference to this being my second Hermit related DnD au; in this au, the Hermits are playing DnD while Pix, Zloy, Lyarrah, Joe Hills, and Cleo are the DMs (With Impulse and Tango ready to stop being players and fill in in case there’s an emergency.)  In game there all a guild of adventurers trying to gain some gold and glory; they travel around in groups of about 4 completing quests.  The DMs all take one of these groups and DM for them, and after a while the DMs randomly shuffle the players around and 4 new groups go off to play with a different DM.

Here’s what all the Hermits came to the table with.

BDubs made a Halfling Wildmagic Barbarian.

Cub made a Human Archfae Warlock.

Doc made a Tiefling Archfiend Warlock.

Etho made a Drow Shadow Monk who later multiclassed into an Arcane Trickster(and his reasoning for this is Monk/Rogue has the same ring as Batman.)

False made a Mountain Dwarf Battel Master.

Scar made a Wood Elf Circle of the Moon Druid.

Grian made a High Elf Gold Dragon Sorcerer.

Hypno made an Orc Enchantment Wizard.

Impulse made a Human Arcane Trickster.

Iskall made a Half Orc Totem Barbarian.

Jevin made an Awakened Pudding(homebrew class Zloy was testing out) Assassin.

Keralis made a Gnome Glamour Bard.

Mumbo made a Human Great Old One Warlock. Ren made a Half Elf Lore Bard.

Stress made a Halfling Circle of the Land Druid.

Tango made a Fire Genasi Eldritch Knight.

TFC made a Mountain Dwarf Battle Master.

Beef made a Human Evocation Wizard.

Wels made a Hill Dwarf Oath of the Crown Paladin.

XB made a Human Life Cleric.

Xisuma made a Human Way of the Open Hand Monk.

Zed made a Half Elf Lore Bard.

A short list of the group’s shenanigans include

Grian, Scar, Zed, and Mumbo teaming up to charm a dragon into giving them all one free favor each.

Grian using his favor to get enough gold to bail Jevin out.

Scar using his to fly a really heavy silver statue to a castle, compleatly avoiding the bandit ambush Cleo had planned.

Zed using his favor to have the dragon help him intimidate an evil baron.

Mumbo used his to get the dragon to distract some guards that were about to kill him, Doc, and Cub for being warlocks, and escape.

Cub once had to cross dress and pretend to be the Tooth Fairy, and ended up scaring a cruel orphanage owner into being kinder to her charges.

Grian: You know what’s better than one fire ball? Beef: Two fire balls.

Zed won a vicious mockery battle.

Ren lost a vicious mockery battle.

Zloy made this sword that’d try to make a player take a level in warlock, but the warlock trio got a hold of it, managing to break it into 3 pieces, taking almost lethal amounts of radiant damage in the process.

Stress managed to convince a small army of jungle creatures to help her defeat an evil wizard.

By the end of the campaign, Iskall will have proficiency in yeeting his team mates, and False, X and Bdubs will have proficiency in being yote.

Cub managed to get Doc to carry him around for a month.

Cub and Scar once stole a magic amulet from a dude by having Cub talk to him while Scar turned into a cat and steal it.

Scar and Zed once transformed into does, but got stuck in a fence running from someone.

[pawpunkao3]

@tomcatacaphe remember when u said “is there a hermit gang edited with naughty words”?

WELL THERE IS NOW

Behold, the worst thing ever! Viewer discretion is advised, the lyrics below contain references to drugs, violence, blood, death, sex, degrading language, and of course lots of swearing!

[Intro: Docm77]

Listen Grian

No one fucks with my shit

You're done (You're done, you're done)

[Verse 1: Docm77]

it all started when Grian touched my laughing gas,

He played himself like a fucking double bass,

No I won’t forgive that

Doc Monster is a savage,

Rip you to shreds with blades and vocal acrobatics

I'm a legend of the NHO, with Etho, Beef and Double O

DocMC will kick your ass sevenfold

You fuckin shrimps ain’t got a chance in this game

Try’na shoot at this leviathan?

You’re gonna have to die again

[Verse 2: Wels]

Yo

You think I'm in hiding, I'm just biding my time

Can’t rush it when I write these kickass rhymes

We're the star-studded group that got together just to crush you

Think you can split us up? Our response is “fuck you!”

I'm the knight, the soldier who brings the fight at first light

Y'all had to incite, so now I gotta indict

You're guilty, gonna go to the electric chair

Unless you give up now. Go home, squares

Wohoo

[Chorus: All]

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

[Verse 3: False]

If you think you can stop the symmetry, that's false

G-Team is screaming for help, but I'm ignoring their calls

And when their bodies dissolve, you'll know that False's on a killing spree

Got no chance to fight or flee, you’ll perish painfully

I'm the queen of hearts, body parts, and sass

Your armor can't stop my martial arts, I’ll kick your ass

Prepare for death,

‘Cause I’ll make you breathe your final breath

Your blood on the floor will be the only thing left

Yeah

[Verse 4: Impulse]

I’m the high-class, badass, redstone innovator

My behavior's crazy, can't phase me, Impulse is never lazy (Uh)

Tango, why would you betray me?

Now my scope is aiming

Better run for cover from all the hell that I’ll be raising (What)

Without a sound, without no hesitation, my creations are astounding

Better watch your step or be vaporized where you’re standing

Who's the better team? C’mon, that’s not a fair fight

But before it's said and done you'll be begging for your lives (All right)

[Chorus: All]

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

[Verse 5: Xisuma]

X gon' give it to ya,

I gon' give it to ya

X gon' give it to ya, what

Fuck the G-Team, might take that slightly more literally

Got some hotties I’d prefer to bang than defeat

That’s a nice ass, hate to have to hand it to ya

But that’s what my team demands I do to ya

Danger, danger

And these lasers gon’ be cruel

It's flexin season, try not to drool

Your weak defenses won’t protect ya

Better come to our side, time to defect, yeah

[Bridge: Xisuma ]

Why’s everyone looking at me like that?

I’m not going to actually fuck them

I guarantee you Ren’s gonna say something even more graphic

And nobody’s gonna accuse him of- oh whatever

[Chorus: All]

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

[Verse 5: Rendog]

Listen up to me, ‘cause you fuckin’ know you have ta (Yeah)

What letter starts the Greek writing system? Alpha!

Ladies bend over, this dog’s got time for every bitch

Cleo don't know who she’s fuckin’ with! (Ooh)

All the signs say to notify her next of kin

This diggity dog be dropping bombs, nothing but hits (Ayy)

Come pick your partners up (Brrr), 'cause the message is

I can top or bottom and still be the best there is (Woo-ah)

[Chorus: All]

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

Hermit Gang, Hermit Gang

[syrisun]

what if when someone becomes a watcher they abandon their name/are given a new title/name (braid, crown, diamond) and because of that, watchers have the tendency to refer to someone by something else. aka: grian in his watcher form calls ren "little bird" because wren/ren, and refers to x and ex as "administrator" and "commander". wels is the "knight", cleo is "flower" and joe is "poet".

yknow anon I’m really emo and this is a really cool concept but I think you’ve got the wrong blog