#reminder that everyone can interpret and enjoy the life series however they want

[in-the-multiverse]

I really enjoy the life series being a thing that goes “thrown into a death game and shit gets intense and we all end up needing therapy” BUT ALSO the meta version where it’s “Grian invited us to a death game and we voluntarily went and shit got intense but it’s all good we know we’re doing this for entertainment, no hard feelings anywhere (although some players hold grudges stronger than others)”

But what if it was combined? Sorta like genloss

Maybe it’s only the winners who see eldritch beings holding cameras or floating cameras. The winners get a special mic held up to them while they rant about their strategies or thoughts. Maybe everyone else sees it too, but it becomes invisible to them as the season progresses. As shit gets intense and they get their head lost in the game

And Gem, the newest addition, doesn’t have seasons worth of ignoring the things out of the corner of her eye. She catches a camera and stares right at it. At the audience. Us

The eye imagery still stands, because what the players perceive as floaty glowing eyes are actually camera lens. Reflective black “eyes”. Watching. Waiting. Recording

[tani-b-art]

What the writers are doing with Janine & Ava is magnificent!

I can’t say if this is also their intended purpose or not (because I’m not in the writer’s room of course but I’m gonna say yeah) but it has been so super rewarding to see these two young, Black women in a corporate setting be so supportive of each other. Emotional support, professional support. Just support. It’s protective even. Instrumental in how they both navigate their careers and personal life. Especially in their respective newfound-ness.

It’s a genuine desire that they want to be supportive of each other. There’s no competition or jealousy. Neither feels threatened or paranoid about getting help from the other or providing help. Because their main goal is what’s best for their students and what is best for their school and whatever means to get to that goal to achieve that, they’ll work together for it.

Because they are approaching a goal that they never attained before, achieving that can come at a point of unfamiliarity — and with that, they can become extremely vulnerable in the unknown and that can cause them to cower or retreat. Normal human reaction/behavior. When you are unfamiliar with something and it’s challenging, it can get frustrating and with frustration comes forgetting the skills you do possess. I enjoy how that is all shown. Because it’s natural. And then, we also get to see how they channel that frustration towards each other in a constructive way to hold one another accountable when they notice they’re dimming just a little bit (from the outside forces). They end up always tapping into each other and reeling each other in to remind one another of their awesomeness (Janine in this episode, Ava visiting Janine at the district for the ASL interpreter last season).

To further speak on this real quick—This happens with everyone at our places of employment but as a Black woman, I’m speaking from my own perspective. With job security and job scarcity (which really isn’t), people always feel the need to defend their territory/defend their position [thanks to capitalism] so it’s not a unique phenomenon only with us, however, it’s unique to us in how society has created narratives like we’re the only sect of society that experiences this; along with wanting to pit the only few Black women in (on account of the lack of diversity) against each other. So you’ll have your co-workers feel the need to be performative in ways that they don’t help you, they don’t look out for you because they feel threatened. But in the world of Abbott, they’re showing the opposite of that. It’s a dynamic that we are seeing more because it’s actually happening in real-life. Black women do look out for their fellow work peers. I’ve experienced it, I’ve witnessed it and I’ve done it and have had it done for me. I’m glad they are showcasing this!

Janine & Ava have no problem at all with being each other’s hype-girl! They always find a way to be encouraging. The praise they fiercely fire off for each other….that’s pure passion to see your girl win!!

In Ava’s case, she needed Janine’s guidance and realness. One, Janine knew how important this was. It being very important for their school standings and two, how accomplished Ava will feel on a personal and professional level. It’s not the first time Janine has volunteered to help Ava too (long ago when her job was on the line). I’m liking how the series has had multiple episodes of this happening. It’s not a one-time occurrence.

Janine stands on Ava business. Ava stands on Janine business.

And I love that!

Black women in corporate settings have to always be on. Meaning always have to be in active mode. Always be on point. Flawless and never having a misstep. And with that, there’s a no-nonsense stance we have to unwaveringly present ourselves as and show and keep on because people consistently test us. Consistently undermine us. Discredit us. Consistently have an issue with respecting our positions of authority and have a perverse pleasure to want to humble us. Or they want your expertise for excelling and being great but then want you to dial it down and alter your own methods of success to be more “palatable” to the masses. I’m glad Ava outright just declined after that.

And here’s where Janine “Big Teagues” comes in!

She understood that Ava truly wanted to do this speaking engagement and how perfect she’d be for it because she is. She also understood with her experience at the district, what they were looking for from Ava and she helped on both ends to facilitate it. She knew what to pull out of her. She understood how to blend Ava being Ava while also polishing Ava’s approach. Which isn’t changing how she is but just mentoring her to get to the destination by traveling to it in another vehicle—by a different means while still being herself.

How well do they read one another!

I would love to know what was said when she made the phone call. Whatever Janine said worked (I low-key feel she demurely told Manny off! Not really but she probably did let him know in her Janine-esque way that Ava is good for this talk and she deserves it). She absolutely championed for her girl to get the gig back. Her energy was just, “Don’t play with my girl like this!” Janine risked contacting the district, bad reputation and all (too funny), just to be able to recommend and advocate on her behalf and to express that Ava, indeed, was the best for the job and yes, you will stand on your word. No backsies.

Back to being able to just switch off:

Janine has a way of being soft & gentle w/ Ava that she feels so comfortable to allow her tenderness to peek out at times. And it’s like a release for her to be able to get a chance to do that in the work-setting. To just shut off sometimes. Also, knowing that her vulnerability won’t get thrown back at her in some ill way (thinking back to how Janine knows about her grandmother and kept that between them) because that space is safe with Janine. Gosh, the levels of mutual respect between them!

Ava almost never gets a chance to show her soft side for fear of appearing too weak (when some people detect that weakness, they use it against you). So, the softness that Janine is able to always pull out of Ava is some of the most touching parts of their connection.

{The last time I’ve seen this character relationship-dynamic b/w two Black women like this was Mercedes & Farrah from P-Valley (and everyone knows how much I luh them!!)}

All the ways Avanine defends one another! Promote each other! Will go above and beyond to make things happen for one another! Going the extra mile to make sure the goal is reached. “I’ll be there for you”, “You can count on me.”

What probably is more than anything for Ava is Ava being acknowledged by Janine. When Janine revealed that although Ava roasted her to step her fashion up, she came to realize that the advice was with genuine intent and that Ava was right. Ava’s realization that Janine actually did take it to heart and applied what she gave, because it was from a good place, made her so proud. Ava truly wanted Janine to unearth that she does need to start seeing the value within herself—that she does deserve it. A lot of things Ava says in jest (her way of not letting her guard down—especially with Janine because she has to maintain that “I don’t like you but I really, really do”; those are such thinly veiled counters that we all just know now) was/is because she really cares for Janine and wants her to want the best for herself.

They complement & compliment one another, feed off each other, they’re proud of each other. They’re symbiotic.

Deep down they both strive to be praised and acknowledged by the other. To have “You did such a good job” said to them, to hear it. To know “I actually am doing a good job, huh”…Janine said I am/Ava said I am! It’s too cute!

There are so many times, and not just in this episode, where Ava looks inwardly at Janine needing her to say, “Yes, you can do it”, “Yes, how you do it is just fine.” Just to hear (or feel the energy of) her say, “I’ve got your back”, because yes, the setback(s) can get so frustrating, discouraging and depleting. We do have those “Just one of those days when you say the right things, to keep me moving on, to keep me growing strong” and when our person comes around and is that voice of reason and support, then it’s all good!

If some of y’all caught it, I’ve been listening to Brandy’s “Best Friend” a lot recently, on repeat — long before this episode but how apropos it is now! Hence the quotes & the music (instrumental version) in the comp. Corny to insert song lyrics lol as quotables but it has meaning and purpose and applies. Her song resurfaced for me at a good time. And no, Janine & Ava ain’t best friends but they are friends and the song is their soundtrack because of the meaning! (to my Avanite heart it is).

Ava reciting Janine’s words of encouragement, during their break-room talk, to the audience at the talk. All that Janine said to her was like a déjà-vu moment of what Ava told her at the district. The parallels. Full-circle moments. This show’s writers!

Also, are we tracking how much Principal Coleman has improved and grown?! The whole district asked her to give a presentation for their Ed Talk because of how successful she is!

Aside from all my Avanite delusions/fantasies and me wanting them to become what they likely never will for series purposes, their relationship as friends is such a fulfilling journey! They’re blossoming each season!

Ladies, if you find a work peer like this, you are truly blessed! Value her!

Get you a Janine. Get you an Ava.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

two monumental parts:

[this one I already spoke on but will repeat]

“And you somehow understand your teachers and what they need”…the sound of Janine’s voice, her tone, how much she emphasized the personal aspect of that while Ava peered at her w/ the head tilt and her entire body shift; she also appeared to be so totally emotional—almost like she wanted to cry (and then had a big cheesy smile after…

when Janine said, “…but the results speak for themselves” and she gestured to herself that she is an example & proof of Ava’s motivational method of deserving better and then Ava beheld her…

((was it just me who thought she was about to kiss her?))

(bites into imaginary edible paper from joy)

+bonus

Janine’s little mannerisms here. Her heart fluttered speaking about Ava like this! Can we say smitten?!

[desultory-novice]

Hi hi! I'm going to answer a couple of different video based asks all in one post because they all follow a similar theme~!

EDIT EDIT: I realized that no one could actually access the links because I took screenshots and added links to the video following each ask!

[VIDEO]

Oh yes! It was one of the first videos I watched when I decided to be brave and finally join the fandom! I remember really liking it, though I don't remember the video contents itself well...!

:cues up for a rewatch:

Heh! Heehee! It's still quite a lot of fun! Years later, I can notice clearly now that this video relies very strongly on what I understand is a controversial/outdated interpretation of Void lore based on the EN translation which is...well, it's the Star Allies English Translation... (As for the details of WHAT it got wrong, o~hhh, I'm not going to get into the Void stuff ~ You'll have to go to other Kirblrs for that! I'm too busy with fixating on my personal blorbos! XD ) However! The end bit about who Kirby is and what Kirby represents? That part of the video remains golden and is something I am 100% in agreement with!

Edit: I realize now you said "videos" and if they're the ones I'm thinking of, then I think I did watch the whole series back then and enjoyed it very much! Sorry for not giving my modern day thoughts on them individually. I didn't want to make you wait too long on this!

[VIDEO]

AH! I just saw this one a few months ago and YES! Yes yes yes! Ohhh, yessss! I agree! It's funny to watch this one back to back with Designing For's video about how the early games were kind of empty fluff compared to the lore-heavy Kumazaki era when Star Warper highlights one of my FAVORITE things that's been gone for so long!!

...I would be SO happy if they focused more on this kind of "natural" world building and character exploration. I suppose, if I have one criticism of Kumazaki, it's that he maybe TOO MUCH of a writer? It's okay to focus where he specializes in, and he's really good at it, but I hope that Star Allies "micro cutscenes" mean we might get them back in a new title, rather than a "last nod" to Kirby history...

This reminds me, I never did anything with this (got swept under by RL) but I came away from this video thinking that I would LOVE to make a series of cutscene animations for the games that don't have them! Just imagine what silly things Kirby or the rest of the characters are getting up to before handing the action back to you!

(Gosh... I don't think I have the experience necessary for this but... with all these collabs, I wonder if anyone would be interested in forming up a collab to make cutscenes for the games that don't have them? I don't know if there's that many animators in the fandom, maybe splash images would be enough? ...Interesting thought?)

But one last enthusiastic yes! As an outspoken fan of, "Show us the daily life of the people in Dream Land PLEASE" this video speaks to me. And I'm glad others feel this way!

[VIDEO]

I KNEW THIS WOULD BE THE CAKE SCENE! I LOVE THE CAKE SCENE! Honestly, I don't know anyone who doesn't just burst into kittens when faced with the cake scene...! It's so cute...! vvv

Speaking of the 25th Anniversary Concert, I have to share my other favorite moment and unfortunately I can't find the full video to refresh my memory (...pulled down for copyright, maybe?) but there was one silly moment when they asked Kirby how old he was, like HIM not the series, and he's like "...I'm 25! ^o^" and of course, it's silly and ridiculous and everyone laughed and for those fans who see Kirby as a very young child, it is just the picture of a child being silly and saying whatever but...as someone who always saw Kirby as growing up with me, I beamed a little with pride? XD

And I think that's the way it should be, maybe? The things Kirby says can be as interpretable as Kirby themselves! ...Reminds me of another quote from Kumazaki that he didn't want Kirby speaking (in Japanese) in the globally streamed 30th Anniversary concert as they did in the 25th because he wanted everyone across the globe to "understand Kirby equally." That if he talked in just one language, a limited number of people would understand him, and everyone should be able to see themselves in Kirby!

It was a very sweet gesture - even though I myself missed hearing Kirby talk in Japanese! Ahh well, at least I'm surrendering my bilingual priviledge card for a good reason! XD

[VIDEO]

OH! Ni~ce find, Anon!

I've seen the fan animation of the phone skit and one more but I was wondering where I might find the rest...! Thank you, video anon!

These are soo~ooo cute! And you're so right! Kawata-san's Kirby really is perfect! I say that feeling the same way about Oomoto-san's Kirby too though...! They're all perfect! This kind of voice (and short skit style) would be perfect for a series of official shorts imo! The kind of ones that occasionally get released on Twitter and the like. (Not that I don't already love the animations made by Courtesy!)

And ahhhh, it's so nice to hear Kirby speak full sentences too~ I really, really enjoy this interpretation of Kirby! I can't believe it's from as far back as 1994! Amazing! Truly amazing!

-

Thank you, anon(s) for the fun video links! And I hope everyone has fun watching them too if you're not familiar with everything listed here! If you ask me, everything here is worth a listen!

[the-somwthing]

Who wants to hear how I see flower husbands (WARNING: it’s bad. My interpretation I mean. It’s not a good one. Everyone is gonna hate it. It’s gonna look like I don’t take anything seriously except I’m completely serious about it being this stupid. If you care a lot about flower husbands interpretations whether positive or negative you might want to look away)

So 3rd Life starts and Scott is evil. For some reason. Jimmy finds him and he KNOWS that Scott sucks but he decides “I can fix him ❤️” except he DOESN’T EVEN TRY to fix him because he loves him the way he is. For some reason.

Scott was evil but being given a flower warmed his heart ONLY ENOUGH TO TRY HAVING A HUSBAND. He didn’t actually become any better or anything and barely showed this love to Jimmy.

JIMMY, however, was very happy with Scott being with him. Now Scott certainly did things that Jimmy wasn’t so happy with, but also you’re not a real jimmy solidarity viewer if you think he isn’t into guys who degrade him. He also viewed himself as quite incompetent and enjoyed having someone who was more competent and would correct his mistakes. NOT THE MOST HEALTHY and sometimes felt to Jimmy like it backfired BUT OVERALL HE WAS PRETTY HAPPY WITH IT.

If anyone ever said “dude this is an abusive relationship you’re in” he would’ve been like “yeah Scott’s so annoying” and Scott would’ve been like “BINCH HOW DARE YOU” and they would’ve got into a fist fight. So the other person goes “WOAH okay so you’re gonna break up then” and they go “no ❤️” and start making out. Nobody knows what this means.

In reality everyone who would point out that the relationship is toxic would ONLY be doing it because they have an ulterior motive cuz EVERYONE IN 3L WAS TOXIC AF 😭 also if they gathered all of the couples together they would ALL start fighting each other so even though FH is TECHNICALLY the worst they manage to LOOK like the healthiest couple by virtue of NOT CARING.

Then Jimmy dies and Scott FINALLY goes “WAIT A MINUTE… I loved him 🥺💔” like it ACTUALLY took him THAT LONG to figure it out. The feelings were actually there the whole time slowly growing but Scott couldn’t recognize them. Not until he lost Jimmy.

And so Jimmy, who saw evil scott smajor and said “I can fix him” and proceeded to NOT EVEN TRY doing that, ended up ACTUALLY FIXING HIM. I mean obviously he still has issues but he stopped having pure evil in his heart and started having a more average amount of evil typical of quite a few life series players.

Now Jimmy’s job is done and he must leave. OKAY SORRY. I have a few interpretations as to why Jimmy tends to act off about FH later on. Here’s some, feel free to mix and match idk.

- well feelings get erased between seasons maybe they REALLY FREAKING wiped Jimmy’s clean

- a big reason Jimmy went with Scott was because he saw Scott as more competent, but Jimmy’s slowly started having more faith in himself so loving Scott is just a reminder of how pathetic he used to be, so whenever Scott insinuates that Jimmy loves him Jimmy equates that to saying Jimmy’s pathetic and needs Scott to take care of him. And he’s not.

- Ever since he died in 3L Scott has been suspiciously less violently abusive which turned Jimmy off so now he needs to go find a new toxic bf cuz all Scott does now is give him flowers and THATS NOT WHY HE FELL IN LOVE WITH HIM!!! 😭 (worst option)

- THE REASON I’m not going with the popular “jimmy realized how much the relationship sucked” thing is because Jimmy tends to look back on a lot of FH stuff pretty fondly AND likes being FRIENDLY with Scott he just doesn’t seem to like the topic of them being IN LOVE.

- it could also be because Scott is annoying af and Jimmy would’ve been fine with it actually if Scott didn’t bring it up every single chance he gets

Also a lot of people when talking about 3L FH bring up empires s1 FH but guys I didn’t watch that season 😭 I mean I watched that date episode I don’t really have anything to say on it. I think esmp1 FH is funny tho cuz the uber fancy elf king goes “I NEED that slimy fish from the bog” but idrk what goes on in esmp1. And also I am VERY “separate SMPs” so whatever goes on in esmp STAYS in esmp LMAO I just mean it’s mostly irrelevant to my life series interpretation.

And then future life seasons like eh. Scott typically ends up ruining it by saying “we were married” every time he sees Jimmy like OKAY BRO way to show your ex you’ve stopped thinking about him slash SARCASM!!!

I am still team LIMITED LIFE FH. Limited Life FH is FH if it was good. I really don’t get why people use it as a negative fh thing it was like their most positive relationship in the whole series. I think the only time Scott wronged him was accidentally causing his death one or more times. Then asking him to say I love you back which is really not like the worst thing you can do to someone really LMAO.

Anyways this is supposed to be about 3L FH. I like 3L FH cuz they’re so weird. Is it healthy? No. Should it have traumatized them? Yeah probably. Did it? No. Was everything really under-negotiated? Yes. Did even THEY understand THEIR OWN relationship? Not really. Is this a GOOD interpretation? Probably not, no. Is Jimmy okay? Probably not but he’s a lot more okay than he should be. Is Scott okay? Dude. He’s something.

Long story short my interpretation of Jimmy is a lot more freaky than most others. idk guys JUST saying. WHO does he gravitate towards being gay with? Usually guys who bully him. Checkmate. Now I’m not saying he knows what he’s doing but he certainly THINKS he does.

I don’t know man. You can talk to me about FH like it’s a good relationship or like Scott traumatized Jimmy and I’ll try to match your energy but this is the truth I have been hiding deep inside of me for so long. I think they’re a weird mess that nobody wants to touch. (In just 3L. Cuz Jimmy somehow fixed Scott by standing there and dying. So they became more normal later on.)

[thetribblelorian]

Yuletide Letter 2023

Dear Yuletide Writer, 

Hello! I’m TheTribblelorian! This is my first year participating in Yuletide, and I’m so excited. I’ve never done this type of thing before. 

Thank you so much for being willing to write a story in one of my favorite small fandoms. I wasn’t quite sure what to include in this letter, but I hope that I can at least give you a better idea of where to start. 

Like and Dislike:

I like to think I’m fairly easy to please. My main DNW is anything involving graphic, non-con or underage sex. I’m fine reading pretty vanilla sex, if you felt called to write one of those. I’d also prefer a happy ending.

I’m a big fan of angst, hurt and comfort, humor and romance. I also like miscommunication, badass women, dancing, soulmates, hanahaki and bodyswap fics. 

Prompts and Info on my fandoms:

I’m not sure if it’s necessary, but I figured I’d provide some more information about each of my fandoms in case it helps. I included some possible prompts to hopefully help you in writing a story, but feel free to write whatever brings you joy. If you enjoy writing it, I’ll probably enjoy reading it. 

Enchanted Forest Chronicles:

Requested Character: Telemain

I love this series. I love all the characters in this series. I grew up reading this series, and nothing brings me more joy than the fact that my favorite novel of all time (Shards of Honor by Lois Mcmaster Bujold) is dedicated to the author of this series. 

I have always felt that it was a shame that, while every other main character seemed to get their own book, Telemain never had his story told. I love reading (and writing) Telemain content. That being said, one of my favorite things is seeing everyone’s different interpretations of Telemain. Please don’t be afraid to write him however you want.

If you are looking for story ideas, I have some quick suggestions for you. Perhaps Morwen gets hurt or enchanted, and Telemain has to help. How would he react? How would she? Or maybe Telemain and Mendenbar go on a life-changing adventure! (Kinda like Zuko and his friends from ATLA!)

Ladyhawke (1985)

Requested Characters: Etienne Navarre, Isabeau d'Anjou, Philippe Gaston (one or more)

This movie rocks! Every time I rewatch it, I think “I want to know more about these characters”. 

I love found families, so if you are looking for some possible ideas, maybe you could write a soulmate fanfic. Or something about Philippe learning the meaning of family. That being said, I’m game for just about anything. Write what makes you happy. 

Lock In - John Scalzi

Requested Characters: Any

This novel was SO GOOD, as was the sequel. I doubt that Scalzi will be writing more of these after the pandemic, which makes me sad. I feel like we have questions that are still unanswered. 

I personally have been enjoying the lack of identifying features Scalzi has given characters in his most recent novels. For example, we don’t know Chris’s race or gender (although I suppose we could make guesses based on their parents). I personally imagine Chris as male (probably due to listening to Will Weaton’s audible narration), but would be happy to see them written as non-binary or female. 

Some story ideas I have if you are looking for prompts include Leslie finally telling Chris what happened to her old partner. Or maybe Leslie and Chris have to integrate for some reason?

Batman: Wayne Family Adventures (Webcomic)

Requested Characters: Three Incompetent Kidnappers

This comic reminds me of Silver age Batman, arguably the best Batman! My Thursday mornings have been a lot brighter since this comic began. 

I particularly like the recurring kidnappers. They make me laugh. I would love to read a funny story about these characters. That being said, if you wanted to write something more angsty, I’d be all for it. 

Some ideas for this story could include Jason getting kidnapped for a change, and Tim having to rescue him. Or maybe Jason teaches the three incompetent kidnappers how to be better. (better kidnappers? better individuals? Up to you!) Does that backfire on him? On them? 

It’s funny how science fiction universes… | Humans are Space Orcs - bogleech (Tumblr Post)

Requested Characters: Any

I thought this tumblr post was so funny. I’m a big science fiction fan (Star Trek, Star Wars, Firefly, Babylon 5, you name it!). I’d love to hear some more scenarios revolving around Humans being viewed as Space orcs. Maybe we could learn about how the aliens view human medicine? Human engineering? Humans in command?!

This ended up being much lengthier than I intended, but I hope it is helpful. Have a very happy Yule and I wish you the best of luck! Thank you again so, so much.

PS: I don't mind treats if someone is feeling inspired.

[ohnominamino]

An Essay on Love in Evangelion: 3.0+1.0 Thrice Upon a Time

Evangelion: 3.0+1.0 Thrice Upon a Time is a movie about love in all its forms. From the love of family, friends, and neighbors, to the compassion we feel for people we have never met. The movie reminds us that love is something we continuously gain, lose, and choose, again and again. Which love is greatest? In my opinion, the answer to that question is left up to interpretation. In this essay, I will give my own personal interpretation on certain character interactions and what I believe we are meant to take away from their Rebuild portrayals. 

The character I will start with is one I’ve noticed the most outrage over from people who haven’t seen the movie and read out-of-context spoilers: Kaworu Nagisa. 

Kaworu is a beloved character among many Evangelion fans, especially those who are members of the LGBT+ community. He is a canonical love interest of Shinji Ikari and I want to reassure people that this final movie does not change that fact. However, it does not make the couple blatantly endgame either. This skirting around the couple might make some fans upset, and while their feelings are completely valid, I do not think they fully understand the difficulties faced by LGBT+ people in Japan, nor do they understand the way that romance is typically conveyed in Japanese storytelling. (I recommend watching “Is ‘Yuri On Ice’ Good Gay Representation?” by James Somerton for more about storytelling nuances.) 

What have we been shown about Shinji and Kaworu’s love? The good news is, anything you read into the original TV series and End of Evangelion is completely true for the Rebuilds— because Kaworu is the same Kaworu. This movie proves Evangelion is a single universe set on repeat, and that Kaworu and Shinji meet each other every loop, and in each, Kaworu is trying to make Shinji happy. Within the final movie, Shinji becomes aware of the loops and chooses to break the cycle and free Kaworu from his pain. 

What does the relationship between Shinji and Kaworu teach us? I believe the purpose of their love is to show the audience that first, in the words of Kaji, “love has no gender.” Second, I believe Kaworu’s love in particular is a warning about basing your own happiness solely upon another person. There are parallels drawn between Gendo/Yui and Kaworu/Shinji. Gendo could not exist without Yui, and so he was willing to destroy the world to be reunited with her. For Kaworu, it was not the destruction of humanity, but the destruction of himself that defined his tragedy. What’s important within the final movie, in my opinion, is that Shinji does not reject Kaworu’s love. With the insight he’s gained from remembering past loops, he sees Kaworu’s love and appreciates him, but he also sees his suffering and wants to ease it. He helps Kaworu into a new world where he can seek his own happiness and find balance in his life (something his father did not have). 

While Kaworu and Shinji are not seen as an explicit couple at the end of the movie, it’s significant to note that, when he sets Kaworu free, Shinji holds out his hand to Kaworu as a promise to stay together. Over the course of the movie, Shinji comes to accept his connection to others through accepting touch (in the form of hand holding and hugs from Rei, Misato, and Gendo); however, Kaworu is the only character in the movie who Shinji initiates physical contact with and that speaks to how much Kaworu means to him. This simple gesture, in my opinion, keeps the door open for Kaworu and Shinji to be a couple one day, after Kaworu has found more balance in his life. 

If I were to write an entire essay about Kaworu, it would be titled, “Out of the Coffin: How the Resurrection of Kaworu Nagisa Buries the Tragic Lovers Trope” because this movie truly does just that. 

Another potential love interest for Shinji for many years was Asuka; however, unlike with Kaworu, the nature of this relationship is not left up to interpretation by the end of the movie. Before her big final battle, Asuka tells Shinji, “I think I loved you back then” (regarding their time in middle school) and Shinji, during Instrumentality, tells Asuka, “Thank you for saying you loved me. I loved you too.” It is past tense. 

What does this relationship teach us? It’s a beautiful way of showing that we can love people, and grow and learn, and let go when we no longer fit each other. Letting go is an integral part of life. Whereas other Instrumentality scenes involve touch, Asuka’s, mirroring the ending of End of Evangelion, has a distinct lack of touch. Shinji sits with his arms around his knees and Asuka turns her body away from him. He gives her his thanks and he sends her off to find her peace. Asuka and Shinji teach us that it’s okay to grow out of relationships. You can appreciate what they were to you at the time they happened and move on. 

What about Rei? To be honest with you, this movie is less about Rei’s relationship with Shinji, and more about her relationship with the world. Rei teaches movie viewers about the simple pleasures of living. While Shinji is in mourning for the first quarter of the movie, Rei (as “Sokkuri”) is learning about crop growing and community, the wonder of babies and kittens, the joy of the bath after a long day of fruitful work, and the power of words and picture books. At the end of her life, she only regrets not having more time to spend with the people she loves. In Instrumentality, Shinji accepts her hand when it is offered to him, which I hope signifies he is ready to see life as she had come to during the final movie. 

Rei teaches us that we can love living and to not take our limited time for granted. 

Next, we move on to parent figures: Gendo and Misato. I think they both represent people ill suited to the role, who do the best they can despite it. Gendo, as mentioned for Kaworu above, is a warning about defining yourself by your relationship to another person (Ikari, afterall, is Yui’s name). He is also a lesson in how people mourn and how they can lash out. Misato, like Gendo, felt herself a poor parent, and while mourning the loss of Kaji, she gave up her child to be raised by other people, but, unlike Gendo, went forward to put all her energy into protecting humanity. Both of them reach out to hug Shinji within the movie and he accepts them where they are. 

While I wouldn’t say the movie shows that Shinji forgives Gendo, it does show his making an effort to understand and make peace with what others have done. For Misato, it is fair to say we can still hope for a better future, even when it feels like everything is crumbling around us. Her self-sacrificing love for her son and the whole of humanity is what enables Shinji to then save the people he loves (via the spear of Gaius). 

In the movie, we are also shown friendship. Touji, Hikari, and Kensuke are important members of their community who maintain open communication with those around them and respect others’ boundaries. They are patient and kind and represent the importance of being present. They teach us to meet people where they are and support them how we can, whether it’s giving them a warm meal or giving them space when they need it. 

There are many more characters that could be talked about, but today I am going to end on Mari. Mari’s love is physical. She enjoys being in people’s personal bubbles. She cuddles Asuka and helps trim her hair, she gets into Gendo’s space at college, and at the end of the movie, she reaches out her hand to Shinji to help him stand up from his seat. Upon first glance, some viewers might take Mari and Shinji’s final scene to be romantic, but the reality of it is this: We do not, and cannot, know what kind of love she is meant to represent in his life.

We do not know Mari’s relationship with Shinji because they hardly interact in the movie. She clearly cares about him, but in my opinion, it comes from a place of duty and compassion— Mari was friends with Gendo and Yui. She has been there since he was born. (If we take the manga to be canon, then Mari even had romantic feelings towards his mother. Her hairstyle and glasses are from Yui. At the end of the movie, Mari has changed her hairstyle, which to me implies she has moved on, and “getting” with Shinji would be a thematic break.)

Additionally, their conversation, while flirty, is very much one that implies they haven’t seen each other for a while. Mari is someone who is very physically affectionate. With everyone. If someone ignores that and focuses on the fact she gets into Shinji’s space and claims that’s romantic, they better acknowledge it’s possibly romantic with Asuka, who we see far more intimacy with. When Mari flirts, Shinji flirts back and her initial reaction is surprise, “Wow, you’ve learned to talk back!” Her purpose is clear. She is there to remove the DSS choker from his neck. 

Personally, I love that Mari is the one to close the movie, for the exact reason that we do not know her relationship with Shinji. For Mari to have an assigned role would be to say, “This kind of love is most important,” when the entire movie was spent showing us each love is of equal importance in the balance and building of our lives. (It’s wonderful to see those types of love embodied across the platform from Shinji at the end of the movie: Rei and Kaworu, who, just like in End of Evangelion, could signify the ability to connect with others and be loved.)

If you view Mari as a romantic love interest, then I think it speaks to the value that you as an individual give to romance rather than what the characters themselves are feeling. To me, Mari, the character who was created to “destroy Eva,” is a symbol of all love. When Shinji takes her offered hand and then pulls her to run into the new world, it’s a symbol of balance. The give and take of any kind of relationship. 

We are the product of every relationship we have ever had, from our parents to the people we once loved, from our friendships to any other person we want to stay connected to. Evangelion: 3.0+1.0 Thrice Upon a Time is a story about these relationships. It is a story about love. 

[angstsfordays]

Beautiful Pain

The Falcon And The Winter Soldier (TFATWS) Series

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Enhanced! Reader

Warnings: None.

Word count: 1.3k

Prologue

Summary: Post-blip, you started to feel lost when most of the Avengers team are gone. Coping with your loss, you still find hope in the connection with your remaining friends. However, it is not easy as everyone is trying to figure their lives after the blip.

Having a long history with Bucky ever since you both saved each other from Hydra, you were still glad you had Bucky after all this time. However, as you try to give Bucky space to find himself after being pardoned for his past, you start to wonder if you should ever cross the line of friendship before it’s too late.

That thought might have to be put on hold though, when you, Sam and Bucky find yourselves having to deal with threats that continue to rise in a post-blip world.

Notes: This series is based on the Disney+ series with my own interpretation as I include my OC in it. A bit late in the game, but I am back after surviving the whole of last year and now closing into graduation! When I knew that this series was out, I knew it was my chance to make a comeback here! 

This is a prologue to give background on the OC. Also, you will get some insight into her history and relationship with Bucky before TFATWS.

Please enjoy and leave a like, reblog or comment to let me know what you think! 💖

This is also the unofficial series masterlist:

Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Chapter Four Chapter Five | Chapter Six | Chapter Seven |

----------------------------//----—————————

Wakanda, 5 years ago

“Hey, I just fed you!” Your brows furrowed in frustration as the little runt of a goat continuously followed you to nip on your loose cotton pants.

You could hear a chuckle from the corner when Bucky came into your view. He was carrying a large sack of fertilizer that was to be used for your edible garden.

The frown on your face slowly curved upwards when you see the beautiful smile on his face. How can a single smile make your heart stop and beat wildly at the same time?

You quickly walked over to where he was, looking at how he bent over to set down the sack before flashing you another heart-stopping smile. From that moment, you only wished to always see him being this happy.

“Steve just wants you to pay attention to him.” Your lips quirked when you thought about how he had decided to name an annoying goat after his best pal.

“Can’t blame him when there’s a pretty girl around.” He continued before he proceeded to open the sack.

You did not know to respond to his compliment but you knew that you shouldn’t think more of it. Steve had told you before of how Bucky was like in the past before everything horrible that happened to him. How he was such a charmer with the ladies.

—————————----//-----------------------——

You wouldn’t have expected it, especially when you met him for the first time. When your powers first revealed themselves in an accident while you were barely a teenager, you found yourself panicking at what was happening to you.

You started finding yourself on the run from Hydra before S.H.I.E.L.D got to you. Taken under Coulson’s wing, you were only supposed to be an asset under close surveillance so that you would not fall into the wrong hands. When you became a young adult, you signed up to be an agent seeing how Coulson was close to you like a father. You wanted to follow in his footsteps to help the world become a better place.

However, given the fact that powers make you a target for Hydra, Director Fury asked you to keep your powers on the down-low. You weren’t allowed to use them in front of others and it was a kept secret amongst the higher-ups.

That all changed when the Avengers initiative was founded. You refused the title but accepted the offer to be part of the team. You once again find yourself at the hands of Hydra once it was revealed that S.H.I.E.L.D was infiltrated from the inside.

You unexpectedly got kidnapped in the mess. When you met Alexander Pierce, you were promised to become an asset to Hydra whether you were willing or not. That’s when you first met Bucky.

You didn’t recognise him at first but the photos that Steve had shown you coupled with the ones you saw in the museum allowed you to fit the pieces together. You still remembered his expression when you first called him by his real name. He didn’t get it at first before you started shouting his full name. That earned you a slap from Pierce himself before he got Rumlow to haul you back into a cell.

As time passed in a blur, the last thing you expected was Bucky breaking you out of your cell and the two of you escaped together. You two stuck like glue throughout the entire time in Romania before he got involved in a crime he didn’t commit.

You fought for him and revealed your powers publicly for the first time. While he and Steve managed to escape, you were arrested for choosing the wrong side and being deemed a threat to global security.

Fast forward, you were brought to Wakanda with Bucky and Steve trusted you to take care of his best pal while he continued to be on the run.

Here you are now, living on a farm with Bucky ever since his programming has been removed. Even though Steve is his best pal, Bucky still feels a distance between him and Steve. They had been separated for more than 70 years after all.

While Steve had only the best intentions for him, Bucky knew he could never be the same old person he was before Hydra happened. Bucky felt like you were the only one who accepts him for who he truly is.

A broken man still trying to recover from his dark past. A man who will never be the same.

You never expected him to become someone else, but only embraced him for who he is. He was grateful that you were always patient with him when he fell into his terrible moods from the aftermath of his nightmares. Bucky felt even more blessed when he saw how you always make him smile and laugh more, reminding him that he is not truly alone and that you were someone he could depend on.

Bucky still feels like it is a dream that he now has you by his side. Who knew that the S.H.I.E.L.D agent that had been planned to become another fist of Hydra alongside him would be the closest person he had now?

The two of you shared more similarities than you realised. Both of you had dreamed of the day you two can stop fighting. Being exposed to the real world since you were a young teen, you started growing weary of it all. You had hoped to find yourself in social work once you retired from this life of constant fighting. Bucky didn’t have any plans for himself for the future but he always hoped you would still be willing to be there beside him.

It seemed easy to define your relationship, right? You two were definitely friends. Confidants, perhaps? There was a constant gnawing feeling in your gut if you two could ever be more. Your feelings for Bucky became stronger with the time you two spent together, but you weren’t sure if it was only because he has been the only constant in your life for the last five years.

While the two of you had your close moments, Bucky never gave the hint that it could allude to more. You weren’t super keen to ruin your friendship either. Bucky has become someone so important in your life that you did not want to lose him. There was no way you want to change anything even if it meant suppressing the growing feelings you had for him.

The thoughts in your head were suddenly interrupted when you hear people approaching. Turning back, you saw King T’Challa and Okoye approaching with more soldiers following behind carrying a case. Bucky stopped his current actions and the two of you proceeded to walk closer to where they stood. You could see the change in his demeanour when the two of you approached closer and saw the case to reveal a new metal arm- specifically Vibranium.

It was a moment of silence as everyone exchanged looks before Bucky spoke.

“Where’s the fight?” You could hear the dread in his voice. Your heart fell at his crestfallen expression, empathising with what he was feeling.

King T’Challa was not oblivious to it either but proceeded to give his response. “On its way.”

You didn’t realise you were holding your breath all this time until you let out an exhale. Looking over to see Bucky with a conflicted expression, your hand reached out to place your hands gently on Bucky’s left shoulder and gave a soft reassuring pat.

You mustered a brave front and showed him a reassuring smile.

“We will get through this together, Buck. As always.” Hoping your words would make him feel better, you were relieved when he returned a smile back at you.

Seeing your optimism no matter the circumstances (especially when the world might potentially come to an end), Bucky Barnes felt like he could do anything as long you were by his side.

[life-rewritten]

THE GIANTS OF THAI BL 2020 AKA SHOWS STEALING MY HEART IN NOVEMBER

UPDATE AND UPCOMING ANALYSIS NOVEMBER 2020

It's the moment I've been waiting for since the excruciating silence of Thai BLS during the lockdown. It's November, the month of thanksgivings, the month of pre-Christmas jitters, nanowrimo and the month that has finally made me realise we are so close to ending this godforsaken year. Still, most of all, November means that we are getting buttloads of shows that are about to take my breath away. This year has been such an exciting year for BLS because of the increasingly amount of companies and directors willing to produce and release different types of BLS. In this list, we have awaited sequels, delicious plotlines and shocking comebacks. But most of all we have lots and lots of romance and men. Which of these have you been waiting for? Let me know. Let's squeal about it. November is going to be so great!

Ratings: From 1 to 5 (1 being least excited to watch, 5 being most,) how excited am I to delve into these shows?

Shows already airing

1.I TOLD SUNSET ABOUT YOU/ INTERPRET, MY LOVE, WITH YOUR HEART

Genre/Themes: Romance, Melodrama, Coming of Age, Angst, Drama, Childhood friendship

Country: Thailand

Verdict: So finally I rise from the memories of poorly produced bls, and pains of bad acting, and toxic writings, and traumas of stiff actors and homophobic agendas to finally say that without a doubt. Nadao has produced another masterpiece after my other favourite (Non) BL; Greater Man academy. Nadao stuns me, and for a very long time, I couldn't understand that this was how everyone was feeling, one because I wasn't fully educated or in the know about the company, I only saw tv shows in Thailand that were produced by GMMTV and to be honest I didn't think there was anything else above that standard in shows apart from Lakorns and Movies. (I know Sacrebleu) Getting to know and watch Nadao shows has been an experience, and for BL, I am hooked and ready for what else they have to offer. The only qualms that prevent me from gushing about the show are how international fans are treated. It took me a very long time to forgive ITSAY for its subbing platform (and price range), and that's why I refused to watch it with positive feelings. After episode 2 though, I'd be a fool to hold on to resentment when there is no doubt that this BL (despite not knowing if it's a sad ending. I'd hate if it is but it wouldn't change anything) is the best BL of this year. With ridiculous, incredible production, outstanding breathtaking cinematography, beautiful and talented actors and writing so good it blows me away. Episode 2 left my heart in pieces, but in a good way, I haven't recovered from the angst.

Ratings: 4.5/5 Would have been a 5/5 if the pricing made sense but also I'm terrified about a sad ending which I won't be too happy about.

2. FRIEND FOREVER/ OUR LOVE IS SICK

Genre/Themes: Romance, Music, Coming of Age, Angst, Drama, Childhood friendship, Rich vs poor,  Bullying 

Country: Thailand

Verdict: It's a pity this show is not available for international fans. Because I think people would actually love this show the way I do. It's so precious, reminds me so much of my first ever BL Lovesick (made by the same production team so makes sense) but better. What can I say about this show, really adorable cast, actually so good on the screen, great chemistry, and good storylines that keep me hooked. I am so in love with surprisingly one of my favourite couples this year Tin and Sea. I have such a great time watching this show, and I enjoy also analysing and just piecing together some of the mysteries in the show. It's been so good so far, and I can't wait for more. The first episodes are a little slow-paced, but it gets better as you keep watching it. I'd advise you to watch the director's cut because that has all of the storylines in the episode instead of the tv version which is more censored and has a lot of deleted scenes that mess with the flow of the storyline. Still, one of my favourite Thai shows right now. 

Ratings: 4/5  I think 4/5 is a fair score just because of some confusion when trying to watch it internationally and getting the right version and I do think the story feels like a whiplash between the different styles of writing of the main two couples. Go watch this though if you haven't, dm me and I'll show you how. 

NON-THAI

3. GAYA SA PELIKULA

Genre/Themes: Romance, Drama, Comedy, Angst, LGBTQ+ Education, Contract relationship, Haters to lovers

Country: Philippines 

Verdict: Normally with verdicts, I have so much to say about a show, also when I analyse I can write essays and essays of information. When it comes to this show, I'm speechless. I'm in awe; I'm crying just even trying to explain how great this show is. How great Fridays are because of this show. How upsetting and damaged I am when the end of the episode occurs, I literally mourn waiting for the next episode the next week because it's too long. This show pulls you in, and it never lets you go. I'm mindblown by the writing of this show, mindblown by the acting, by the production, music, but most of all I have become a mess because of this meta in this show. I have cried so much because of how much I care about this show, the characters are all fleshed out, are so powerfully written, and emotionally tugs at your heartstrings whilst still educating and representing LGBTQ community fantastically. I don't know what we did to deserve a show like this. Maybe its because after years of waiting for something to finally show up and just be unproblematic and be so great with no questions, no confusions, no struggle, this show is just that. And I will be forever thankful to the whole team that brought this to us

Ratings: 5/5 I would give this more than 5 if I could. That's how much this show means to me. 

4. CHERRY MAGIC 

Genre/Themes: Romance, Comedy, Supernatural, Office drama, Slice of Life

Country: Japan

Verdict: Kurosawa and Adachi. That's it. That's the reason for the 5/5 stars when it comes to watching this show. First of all, I like Japanese romantic comedy shows, and anime, and manga. So seeing cherry magic come to life as this amazing form of that makes me so happy. Typically with Japanese BL, everything feels so serious sometimes, and then sometimes it feels too crazy and over the top. But Cherry Magic just feels like a warm hug when you watch it; you can't help your self but to smile and giggle at Adachi's adventures realising that he can read minds because he's a virgin at 30 years old. To add to that, he is given Kurosowa this incredible, amazing, wonderful non-toxic man who absolutely adores him and unconditionally is there for him. I just like what? Where do I get my own Kurosawa? Like it just feels so unfair haha. But really cherry magic is full of great acting, fantastic plot and unique as well. Every character is also written well, and all have interesting dynamics. We also have another side couple who is so funny and ridiculous but also just cute and heartwarming. I have a great time watching this show and the fact that it's ending on Christmas day? Already tells you what this show is, a gift and its a great one. 

Ratings: 5/5 I want my own Kurosawa. That's it. That's all I want Universe.

Shows Upcoming

5. THARNTYPE 7 YEARS OF LOVE

Genre/Themes: Romance, Drama, Comedy,  Mature, LGBTQ+ Representation, Internalised homophobia, Sequel

Country: Thailand

Verdict: This is a complicated show to gush about. First of all TharnType, the series in 2019 was one of my favourite shows that brought me back to this BL thing. I absolutely adore all the actors, and I also loved the storyline like I said before there's something about Mame's writing that I appreciate, I think most of her strengths is found in TharnType. Because of this, this sequel is one of my most anticipated show this year. However, I feel conflicted because I hate sequels. I hate couples having to go through the weird-ass, shallow, conflicts that just end up ruining the meaning of their previous show and leaves me with a bad taste in my mouth about the couple I once loved (Looking at you Together with me the next chapter still traumatised honestly). Enough of the negatives, Tharn and Type from the trailer looks like it's going to be a wild ride, I can even see the great chemistry that made me fall for MewGulf, and I'm so excited to see the new couples and characters. I also am so excited to see TECHNO again and laugh with him every Friday. We also know that the awaited wedding between our couple is also going to be in this show. And that's going to make me bawl like a baby. Let's hope we don't have too many toxic or troublesome storylines, let's hope we don't have too many breakups and fights (because that hurts so much seeing Mew cry) and let's hope we finally have a sequel that is better than its predecessor. 

Ratings: 4.5/5  This is how I feel about it, I don't think I can rate it as 5/5 because of all the worry and anxiety at what the storyline entails—still a great show to look forward to. 

6. MANNER OF DEATH

Genre/Themes: Romance, Crime, Mature, Angst, Drama, Mystery, Thriller, Haters to Lovers

Country: Thailand

Verdict: Think about it. Why wouldn't this be number one on everyone's list of upcoming BLS? We have the return of one of the best actors in this genre MaxTul the actual godfathers of Thai BL; we have an incredible team here with a director that has won multiple awards, with a storyline that is unique to Thai BL, we're getting crime, detective, mystery BL with mature characters who are not in university? As if that's not enough, we also have a really incredible plotline about this forensic doctor who falls in love with someone who we are not sure if we should trust because he could be a murderer! Like oooh yes please, the drama, the angst, the thrill?? I'm ready for this; I am so prepared to give my whole heart and attention on this show. I want it to be so good, to defeat the shows of 2019 that came and took our hearts away, to be the best BL ever. It's so difficult not to raise my expectations when it comes to this show when I know we have a great cast, great chemistry, non-stiff acting, and just a really non-toxic author as well. I look forward to this so much. Only issue/question? Where is the trailer? Hello WETV, where is our teaser? Why don't we know the date for when this is coming out? I want it out now. But I'll try and be patient okay? 

Ratings: 5/5 I can't think of how this show won't be good. And that's really worrying. But for now, I'll keep my expectations high and wait.

7. TONHON CHONTALEE 

Genre/Themes: Romance, Coming of Age, Angst, Comedy, Childhood friendship, GMMTV

Country: Thailand

Verdict: Podd and KHAOTHUNG, (my sun, my heart, my favourite person ever) Sorry just gushing over my two faves. GMMTV has shocked me this year with the announcement of this show. First of all, Khao gets to have a show where he's the main lead. I've been waiting for this, and I'm so proud and excited for him. Not only that obviously, but TonTonChontalee looks really good with a vibe of a  comedic spin to one of my favourite shows Theory of love. I am ready to see Podd act so stupid as Ton and at the same time sob when he finally realises that Chon is the one. I'm so ready to see Khao act his socks off, and the show looks so funny, so fun and just like the chemistry between two is definitely a winner. I cannot wait for this next Friday. And it also has Mike and Toptap! What's not to love? Seriously though I'm praying this is successful, and it helps both Podd and Khao to dominate GMMTV. Let's find out next Friday.

Ratings: 5/5 For Podd and Khaothung. Just worth the rating.

8. GEN Y THE SERIES

Genre/Themes: Romance, Drama, Comedy, Angst, 2moons Fanfiction, Haters to Lovers

Country: Thailand

Verdict: First of all 2 MOONS Reunion! What?? Very shocked to see this show tbh one because it's like a direct copy of 2moons the series; the same cast, the weird alternations to the same name, the same kind of plot as well. Channel 3 has finally decided to invest in BLs,  one of the biggest companies in Thailand, so the budget is high, the actors are known and famous, the production is good. This is so exciting to see. Also, 2moons was one of my favourite past BLs the whole time it was airing, and I had a massive affinity for Kimmon and Copter, so it's great to see them play their characters again but with a better budget and now glow up and grown. Their acting seems to have improved, Kit and Ming's storyline being the main focus is also really lovely to see. I also love seeing Bas and the other actors from other Bl series (The Moment actors) and I'm excited to know more about the new cast as well. So yeh this show has a great potential to win my heart as well, and the competition is not easy at all. But with a great company behind them and an exciting premise, this can also be a winner. 

Ratings: 4/5 I'm intrigued by this show, and I look forward to seeing what it brings.

November is such an exciting month for someone like me who just loves watching tv and analysing and just seeing romance bloom. These couples, stories and actors have a great potential to be the best things of 2020 so far, each of these shows holds evidence that they're worth paying attention to and honestly I've missed seeing Thai BLs that make me so excited so much. I've missed these actors, I've loved each and every one of them, and I can't wait to see them this month on my screen. What about you, guys? What do you look forward to? Who are your favourites? What are you worried about when it comes to these comebacks. Let's discuss.

[obeyme-kaidii-writes]

Maybe a scenario on how the poly relationship happen and the guys reaction to it or just a short fluff story with them comforting there MC together

I really loved this idea about exploring how each of the boys would react to a polyamorous relationship being suggested (and how it would come to work out). As I was writing this, it became more of a headcanon type thing than what I’d call a scenario because of how I think things would play out. I was also really inspired by the idea, and think I will be working on relationship and poly relationship headcanons for everyone else too (previously I’ve only done Mammon & Levi).

I thought about writing a disclaimer of sorts about what I had in mind when writing this, but then I realized that was pointless. I WANT people to be able to interpret things however they want. So if you see these things as demoncest-y, then well, I guess they are. 🤷🏻‍♀️ If that bothers you, then my blog isn’t the place for you. 🙃

Suggesting a Poly Relationship

All Brothers x gn!MC

Words - 976

Content warnings - mostly just fluff, maybe demoncest if you squint?

Prompt/Inspiration - How would the boys react to MC suggesting a poly relationship with their brother(s).

Lucifer

He could go one of two ways

Either he’s fine with you having all the relationships you want, so long as he’s your #1

Or he’ll only share your affections with Diavolo, if he shares with anyone at all (and that’s only because I headcanon that he’s already in a relationship with him lol)

If you want an equal relationship between multiple partners? I just don’t see Lucifer letting that happen.

He’d leave hickies or other marks on you when he knew you’d be spending time with another partner.

And he’d be quick to cover up marks made by others whenever you return.

You belong to him (and he definitely belongs to you).

Mammon

When you suggest a poly relationship with him, his feelings are honestly hurt.

He worries enough as it is that he’s not good enough for you, and now you want to bring someone else into your relationship? That’s just proof of his worst fears.

He will come around eventually though. After a LOT of negotiations.

And a lot of cuddles and reassurance.

You’ll need to make sure to spend a lot of one-on-one time with him, telling him that your life wouldn’t feel complete without The Great Mammon in it.

Absolutely would not tolerate Lucifer as a partner.

I honestly only see him being comfortable with Levi or maybe Beel.

Lots of group dates and matching items. (Just make sure to get some things just for the two of you to share.)

Leviathan

Like Mammon, he’ll also be hurt at the suggestion if you are already in a relationship with him.

If you invite him into your relationship with someone else, he’ll handle it better.

But still, this boy is crazy jelly. It will take a lot of reassurance and negotiations to make sure he’s comfortable.

One-on-one time with you is a must.

It’ll take him awhile to adjust to being affectionate with you in front of any other partners.

He's not really a fan of group dates, unless they are aligned with his interests. Otherwise he’ll just feel out of place and super awkward.

Mammon makes a good match for him because they are both chaotic idiots with a lot of overlapping interests. (And I already have a whole headcanon explaining how that would work lol)

Beel would be another reasonable option since he’s also really accommodating. If there are snacks involved, Beel is good. So Levi wouldn’t have problems convincing Beel to engage in group activities that he’d enjoy.

Satan

Handles the suggestion of a poly relationship much better than many of his brothers.

Unless you try suggesting one with Lucifer.

The only way you might be able to convince him to be ok with that, would be if he wasn’t expected to ever do group activities with him.

He’d need alone time with you, even more so than Levi.

A relationship with Lucifer would also be highly volatile. I’d have my doubts honestly about how well it would work long term.

I’d see a lot of competing between the two at who can care for you better. It would be a fine line to walk to make sure they respect you and don’t get obsessed with outdoing one another.

He would work really well with Asmo though, or even Levi.

I could definitely see him and Levi finding a series that they share a mutual interest in (books, manga, tv show etc) and going full on Geek.

Asmodeus

He’s totally open to the idea, and might even be the one to suggest it to you if he knew one or more of his brothers was interested

Could make it work with anyone. His ideal partner would probably be Satan though since they get along so well.

He’s the king about putting your feelings first and making sure your needs are met.

Whereas Lucifer x Satan could easily get caught up in one upping each other, Asmo is above all that.

He already knows he’s the best in the bedroom, he doesn’t need to prove it to anyone.

But he still will need a lot of reassurance that he makes you happy.

He loves spending one-on-one time together doing intimate, but nonsexual things like baths, massages etc.

Dote on him to remind him that you value your time together.

Beelzebub

He’s very accepting and understanding when you make the suggestion.

Like Asmo, could easily make it work with anyone. He doesn’t have a strong preference either way, he just wants you happy and protected.

Has a particular soft spot for Lucifer (and of course Belphie).

He also loves it when he can watch you spend time with your other partner(s).

You making Lucifer smile? Beel seriously might tear up at the sight.

He really enjoys group dates.

And nothing would make him happier than seeing you and your partners at one of his sports events, cheering him on.

And if you play sports too, he’ll be the loudest cheerleader you’ve ever had.

Belphegor

Will only accept Beel as a partner. No ifs ands or buts about it.

If you don’t suggest Beel, he’ll suggest him.

Both of you will dote on Beel, making sure he gets all his favorite snacks, letting him choose the restaurant on group outings, never missing a sports game etc

You and Beel of course spoil Belphie rotten.

You thought he was bad before? You haven’t seen anything yet.

When it comes to taking care of you, you’ve never been safer than with the two of them.

Beel will go with you everywhere, and if for some reason he can’t, Belphie will be there instead.

He might love napping with you, but being awake isn’t so bad if he is spending time with you.

Expect to spend the rest of your life sandwiched between the two of them. That’s just where you live now. Accept it.

Most of your dates will be shared activities.

[agentnico]

No Time To Die (2021) Review

I swear this movie came out 2 years ago?... Okay, yes, I agree, that was a cheap gag, but look, the constant postponement of this film's release is in itself a joke! Finally though, it is here.

Plot: James Bond is enjoying a tranquil life in Jamaica after leaving active service. However, his peace is short-lived as his old CIA friend, Felix Leiter, shows up and asks for help.

“I’d rather slash my wrists.” Those were the words spoken by actor Daniel Craig in 2015 for a Time Out magazine interview prior to the release of Spectre. Seemingly it felt as if Craig was done with his signature role as famed British spy James Bond, however be as it may have been, MGM managed to sway away Craig’s suicidal thoughts and cut him a cheque with a sum he simply couldn’t refuse and have him return for a proper final outing. Hollywood business at it’s finest, ladies and gentlemen! But the question is posed, was there a need for another Craig/Bond film? For the previous instalment Spectre was such a let-down that it left a sour taste, or at least I think it did. Honestly, I don’t really remember much of what happened in Spectre, it was such a shoulder-shrugging forgettable feature. The answer however is a positive one, for No Time To Die ends up being worth the wait. All this wait. Though I would’ve found it super amusing if this film came out and turned out to be an absolute stinker, as then everyone would just be sat there in the theatre wondering why the hell we’ve been waiting for this movie this entire time. But nope, it’s a good one.

No Time To Die really feels like a culmination of Daniel Craig’s time as James Bond. And with that merit this movie doesn’t actually feel like a James Bond film. Yes, it has the one-liners and the action set pieces and the typical tropes of a Bond film, however the focus here is very much more on Daniel Craig’s interpretation of the character, and how he managed to turn a weapon into a human. For James Bond at the end of the day was always a killing machine. License to kill and all that jazz was always at the centre of what made the character, however Craig’s take brought a lot of humanity and reality to what was a stereotype. And it’s shown more than ever in No Time To Die, with Daniel Craig delivering a performance of vast emotional gamut. His Bond experiences moments of general happiness and actual love (real love, not just his typical one-night stands he’s known for) to then fury and sadness. My fiancée jokingly made a remark at the beginning of this movie about how petty James Bond is acting in this movie. And I agreeably chuckled at first, for to be fair he was getting offended easily and taking everything so personally without giving it much thought, however the more the movie progressed, the more I understood why he was this way. It made him feel more human, and actually made me care for him. Additionally, the aforementioned element of love plays a big part in this film, for romance is truly at the heart of this one. Bond turns out to be a real loving sweetheart, and this all culminated in one hell of a finale, one that really surprised me with it’s emotional gut punch. Look, I see this film’s ending really dividing audiences as it’s not something you would typically expect from a James Bond movie, however I absolutely relished it and saw it as a perfect swan song for Daniel Craig.

The movie is long. In fact, it’s very long. In fact, it’s too long. It runs at nearly 3 hours and yes, there is a lot of story crammed into this but honestly there are many chunks that could have been cut down and the film would have benefitted from it. For the movie is very good, but it has chunks that drag which does cause the experience to be slightly diminished, however that being said, this is a very well directed movie. Cary Joji Fukunaga (who’s previous work I don’t know much of though I have seen his Netflix limited series Maniac with Jonah Hill and Emma Stone which I do recommend highly) exhibits some strong directing here, balancing moments of real tension using unsettling imagery with moments of levity and good character chemistry. Yes, he brings class and the right amount of epicness to the action sequences, but it was actually the quieter moments that I feel he really excelled at. The opening sequence is especially disturbing, with the way Fukunaga displays this lonely isolated house in the middle of snowy nowhere, and we see a mysterious figure creep towards it wearing a mask so creepy it reminded me of that freaky monkey mask from the horror thriller I See You. A shot from behind a sliding glass door I found especially unnerving. 

Performances across the board are all great. Daniel Craig I’ve already sing praise for, however others are to be mentioned also. Rami Malek manages to take a fairly lacklustre villain and present him in proper vile fashion. He’s truly unpleasant and horrible in this role, and I truly despised him which is what made him perfect for the role. That being said the actual character was weak. There wasn’t much meat to him so to speak. Typical Bond bad guy who wanted to see the world burn. Lea Seydoux returns as Bond’s love interest Madeleine and her chemistry with Craig is wonderful and I really enjoyed seeing her character develop more since the last movie. Returning from Spectre too is the villainous Blofeld played by Christoph Waltz, and though he isn’t in the movie much, I weirdly enjoyed him more this time around. In Spectre is was really forgettable and the script didn’t know what to do with him, whilst here is serves a specific purpose and we also get to enjoy a great scene with him in prison having a battle of wits with Bond. Real good stuff. We also have a couple of new Bond girls, with Lashana Lynch taking on the 007 mantle, and it was nice seeing a very different kind of spy in her. Her and Bond bicker quite a bit, however natural they become buddies and they are the better for it. And Lynch can be easily added to the list of powerful badass women on-screen. Ana de Armas also appears in what is a little Knives Out reunion, and unfortunately she’s only in the movie for one sequence, but it’s actually a great sequence with her putting a new spin on the Bond girl stereotype, bringing charm, swagger and humour and riffing off good banter with Craig. Shame we only see so little of her. The likes of Naomie Harris, Ben Whishaw and Ralph Fiennes also return, and even Jeffrey Wright takes a break from pondering What If? scenarios to make a little comeback. 

No Time To Die definitely stands next to the better Daniel Craig Bond films alongside Casino Royale and Skyfall, and it’s a true culmination of all of them, whilst still managing to ignore and forget the existence of Quantum of Solace, which is good, because Quantum of Solace sucks and I can’t believe I even managed to bring it up again!! Regardless, what a way to send off Daniel Craig on a proper high, and really refreshing to actually witness a Bond movie that features feelings and emotions. In fact, it’s pure Valentine’s Day essential viewing, so mark your calendars for next year, as you now know what film you have to rewatch on February 14th 2021! 

Overall score: 8/10

[richincolor]

SomeThoughts about Netflix's Shadow & Bone

This past Friday, the highly anticipated Shadow and Bone series premiered on Netflix and fans of the Grishaverse all over the world logged in to watch their favs come to life. There was much discussion of the inclusion of numerous characters from throughout the Grishaverse and that diversity was a focus in the casting of the show, especially Jessie Mei Li who is biracial, therefore changing the main character’s ethnicity to biracial Shu Han. Unfortunately, that decision didn’t pay off to well due to the showrunner’s handling of Alina’s ethnicity. Twitter blew up as people shared their hurt and warned others about what to expect.

I had planned to watch the show and happened to see one such warning before I watched the series so I was prepared. I watched a couple of episodes, then called it a night. The next morning I was unsettled and reached out to my fellow contributors here on Rich in Color. No one had seen it yet, but Jessica said she was planning to as well. As we chatted, I felt that our conversation should be shared with our readers, so Jessica and I decided to write our thoughts down and have a conversation after she watched a few episodes herself.

Oh, and spoilers abound!

First off, before we dive into this conversation: Have you read the Grishaverse series? How much did you know about the story going in?

K. Imani: As everyone knows I love fantasy so I’m open to reading all sorts of fantasy books. I read the Shadow & Bone series a few years ago and enjoyed it. When the Six of Crows duology came out I read those too and actually enjoyed those better than the original series. Why - more diversity? It also expanded the world and the different perspectives of “Grisha” like folk from other cultures. It was very clear from the writing that Bardugo realized her first series was very lacking in diversity and worked hard to change it. I actually re-read both series during quarantine, so I had a fair idea of what the Netflix series would be about.

Jessica: I’ve actually never read a single Grishaverse book! I know, shocking. I only knew two things about the series going into the show: 1) Six of Crows is a heist book? 2) Ben Barnes is a person who exists.

The cast announcement for any show is always so exciting, and Shadow and Bone was no different. How did you feel about the casting -- before and after you watched the show? What did you think was done well, and what did you think could be improved?

K. Imani: Before watching the show I was actually a bit confused about some of the casting choices. I didn’t understand why 3 of the main Six of Crows characters were in the show and I honestly did not make the connection to Alina and Mal being biracial. Knowing that the Grishaverse is “Russian-based” and knowing that some ethnic Mongolians are considered Russian I just found it cool that the show cast a person who didn’t fit a Russian stereotype. Oh boy was I way off! Overall I was pleased with the casting and think all the actors did a great job. I liked the few changes they did make with casting actors of colors for other roles to round out the diversity of the world.

Bringing it back to Mal, I was confused as to if he was supposed to be coded as biracial. I missed the reference in the show, but I did read somewhere that he was supposed to be as well and that is what bonded him to Alina. If that’s the case, then how come Alina was the only person to experience racism? That thought continues to sit on my heart because it shows that the writers did not really think through how they wanted to express racism and included it for the wrong reasons.

Jessica: My reaction was basically, “I’m happy that other people seem happy!” since again, I had no context for the show. Casting on Netflix shows often seems to be a case of “cool, this is some exciting casting… but definitely could be better and even more intentional.”

K. Imani: “More intentional” That is the word right there! Making a story more diverse is wonderful and fully reflects the world we live in, however if you just randomly do it without thinking it through it comes off as insensitive. I know Leigh Bardugo used this show as an opportunity to make her story better (and I do not begrudge her of that fact) but when one doesn’t think it through, the criticism that is being expressed is a direct result.

Jessica: Sidenote -- I ended up watching a booktube video titled “Darker Jesper, Fat Nina, Shadow and Bone Casting Thoughts” on booktube channel Chronicles of Noria about the casting. Highly recommend checking it out. I also recommend this profile on Jessie Mei Li, who talks about being gender nonconforming.

Did any changes in the Netflix adaptation stick out to you? Were there changes you liked or disliked?

K. Imani: My favorite part of the adaptation is how well the show runners included the Six of Crows characters into the narrative. The storyline completely worked for me and connected the two stories together. I really enjoyed the Arken storyline (and the character tbh) as it was used to flesh out the world of the Grishaverse, which made the series much more interesting. I also liked the change of making Ivan and Fedyor a couple instead of just Darkling’s henchmen as it humanized them and actually made me like Ivan because they were so cute together. Though how that will come into play after the events of Episode 8 will be interesting. I’m a sucker for the Enemies to Lover trope so I loved that Nina’s & Matthia’s story of how they came together was included here. In either Six of Crows or Crooked Kingdom (I don’t remember), it was told as a flashback, but I loved that it was moved here as their “origin story”, so to speak, and how it connects to the events of the Alina timeline.

What I didn’t like...the casual racism. It really bothered me and left me sad the next morning. For example, a certain poster shown in the first episode had me physically cringe and I was upset that 1)  the production designers even created it and 2) no one, at no point, said that was a bad idea? Come on! It was horrible to see and I can imagine the hurt an AAPI would experience seeing that. And then, it got worse. Racial slurs thrown around a couple of times in the first couple of episodes to show that Alina is an outsider. They were jarring and took me out of the narrative. Having read the books I knew there was tension between the Ravkans and Shu Han, so I could understand what the show runners were trying to do, but it was actually never explained in show, hence making the racism feel random and just there for shock value.

Jessica: I saw tweets going around alluding to the racism Alina (and other characters to a less frequent extent) faced, so I braced myself for it. I’m only a few episodes in, and the instances so far were brief… but it just didn’t feel right. The foundation for this portrayal of racism wasn’t laid properly. And if the work of laying the foundation and really digging into what it means for the overall worldbuilding doesn’t happen… then why include it at all? Especially if it might be painful for certain viewers? I’m sure harm wasn’t the intent, but that’s the impact. Why not leave it out and let the show be escapism?

K. Imani: Jessica, the eyes comment took me out, not gonna lie. I audibly screamed. Anyone who has experienced a racist comment based on their looks felt that in their gut which is horrible when watching a show for escapism.

Jessica: Yeah, the eyes and rice-eater comments were especially frustrating. On top of it being a reminder of the racism Asians experience daily… it doesn’t make much sense. Like, canonically, do people in Ravka not eat rice? An American’s conception of racism isn’t necessarily going to make sense in a (Imperial Russia-inspired) fantasy world. But maybe I’m missing something since I didn’t read the original books.

And the eyes comment… whoof. When I was a kid, other kids would make fun of my eyes and ask me to, like, count seagulls because surely, I couldn’t see out of my eyes… And the other kids were also Asian! Internalized racism is so real. It’s disappointing that Shadow and Bone would include this experience as, I don’t know, discrimination flavor text. Surely there were better ways to portray discrimination that made sense within the Grishaverse…

Ellen Oh really said it so well: “If a writer is going to show racism against Asians, it's important to balance it with the beauty of all that makes us Asian also.” Where is the balance? Where is the nuance? Even if Alina’s Shu Han mother isn’t alive, couldn’t Alina have had a treasured Shu Han pendant? Just spitballing here. There were so many possibilities.

K. Imani: Exactly. I agree with Ellen and unfortunately there is no balance. That’s what makes it so hurtful. The focus is on how bad it is that she’s biracial and how bad the Shu Hans are for no specific reason. Because Alina is an orphan and grew up in Ravka, she unfortunately has no connection to Shu Han culture (or at least what is shown on screen) so all that she identifies as is Ravkan who just happens to look like a Shu Han person, but she doesn’t exhibit any pride in being Shu Han. Her ethnicity is just another obstacle to overcome which is all the more cringeworthy and why having Alina be biracial just to be biracial without thinking it through ended up being so problematic. Having her be biracial and using casual racism as an “obstacle” that she has to overcome is such a shallow interpretation of racism and shows the writers didn’t do the work to really think about the why the racism exists.

In addition to talking about what was done well and what went wrong or felt off about certain representation, it’s important to look at the “how.” How did this happen?

Jessica: I read on Twitter that one of the show writers is Korean and biracial -- which is awesome! I was really heartened to hear that. But at the same time, this highlights how important it is to have multiple marginalized voices in the room who can speak with some level of expertise. I don’t know the decision-making process that went into including this sort of surface-level, simplistic version of real world racism, but I wonder if anyone, at any point, said “is there a more nuanced and original way to portray this?” or “how will this affect Asian viewers?” Did someone bring it up, and they were overruled? What happened?

This absolutely isn’t a judgment on the Asian writers or staff on the show. When I’ve done collaborative writing, there were times I caught an issue and said “we need to be more sensitive about this” -- and there were other times when my teammates pointed out something I didn’t notice. It happens! That’s why it’s so important to have multiple marginalized perspectives when creating something -- especially when it’s a work as impactful and far-reaching as a Netflix show. Placing the burden of complex, nuanced representation on one, or a scant handful, of marginalized creators is just not going to work… and it’s not fair to the creators, either.

Frankly, this is a problem in so many industries -- film, publishing, games... there are so many “diverse” shows, games, etc with all-white or majority white teams. Good, nuanced representation can only happen when BIPOC / marginalized creators are the majority and have power behind-the-scenes. (This is why I’m really excited to watch the show Rutherford Falls -- half the writers room are Indigenous writers, as is the co-creator!)

K. Imani: Exactly! It’s great that one of the writers is biracial and Korean, but if she’s the only one how much input did she really have? I’m by no means knocking her experience but, say for example, that particular poster in the first episode. No one else behind the scenes found it problematic? There are many steps to a production process and that poster, if there had been more diverse voices present on the production staff instead of just 1 writer, would have been flagged as a huge problem and redone. The poster was supposed to be a “short cut” to show Ravkan/Shu Han tension but instead it came off as so profoundly racist and unnecessary. There are many other non-racist ways to explore the tensions between the two countries that could have been explored instead of just jumping to racism. And...as someone on Twitter pointed out, we never see the tension between the Ravkans and the Shu Han, but we openly see fighting between the Ravkans and the Fjierdans, so why were they not vilified to the same extent?

Jessica: Right. I’m definitely not saying racism can’t be portrayed in fantasy ever. But if you’re going to do it, make it make sense within the world. Don’t just use it as shorthand for “this character is Other.” I mean, experiencing racism isn’t what makes me Asian…

K. Imani: Boom! I’m going to repeat that for the people in the back...experiencing racism is not what makes a person Asian or Black, and if you are going to have racism in a work of art, be sure to provide balance to show all the other aspects of a person of color’s life.

Since we’re talking creators behind-the-scenes… which YA fantasy books by Asian authors do you think would make great Netflix shows or movies?

Jessica: I’ve got a list about a mile long, but I’ve cut it down to my top four:

These Violent Delights by Chloe Gong

Forest of a Thousand Lanterns by Julie C. Dao

The Tiger at Midnight by Swati Teerdhala

The Epic Crush of Genie Lo by F.C. Yee

You’re welcome, Netflix execs who are totally reading this blog. Hop to it!

K. Imani: I second the Tiger at Midnight series! I loved the first two books and can’t wait for the conclusion in June. While not YA, the City of Brass series would make an excellent Netflix series. Anything Maurene Goo writes would be fun rom-coms (because we need those too!).

Jessica: I mean, with To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before complete… Netflix clearly needs to start adapting Maurene Goo’s books.

K. Imani: Yes, the people demand it! I don’t care which book, just grab one of them and get the production started.

On a final note, I do want to say that despite the criticism the show rightly deserves, there was much about the show that was enjoyable. The storytelling was strong and moved at a good pace, the costuming was on point, special effects worked seamlessly into the narrative, and even small touches such as how the Grishas used their small science was visually interesting. Book adaptations are always hard to pull off well and the Shadow and Bone production team did a good job overall. Their intention towards adding more diversity is a step in the right direction, but just didn’t do enough. Let’s hope they learn from their mistakes and improve for season 2.

[mint-yooxgi]

All Consuming - Yandere!Powers!Jimin X Powers!Reader

Yandere!AU - Part of the Yandere!BTS X Reader Series

Genre: Mature, Horror, Angst, Semi-Smut (Mentions of Masturbation)

Pairing: Jimin X Reader

Words: 12,780

Warning: Minor assault. This is a Yandere story, it will contain themes such as stalking, violence, obsession, possessive natures, and just general overall creepiness and swearing. You have been warned.

A/n: Damn this turned out way longer than expected, but it’s finally here! Yay! After how many months of me saying it’ll be posted soon over and over again lmaoo. My apologies about that, life got crazy and I was severely demotivated to write this story for the longest time. Anyways, I'm glad it’s done now, though I think the first half is a bit slow to start. Hopefully it lives up to everyone’s expectations! Loosely inspired by X-Men. As always, I do not believe Jimin, nor any member of BTS would act like this. This is just my interpretation of the archetype. Feedback is greatly appreciated, enjoy!

Another day, another summer that has come and gone within the blink of an eye. This year in particular has gone by quicker than all the rest, and you’re not sure why. You’re just glad to be back at the academy and away from your brother.

A sigh slips past your lips as you stare up at the large stone building, standing almost castle-like in appearance. You watch as hundreds of students mill around you, some returning for another year, while others take in the grand sight before them for the first time. You can hear all their thoughts in your mind, jumbled over one another as their emotions over power you for the time being.

The first day is always the hardest.

Closing your eyes for a brief moment, you focus on casting out all the unwanted voices from your head, something which you learned to do last year, and worked hard to perfect over the summer. Breathing out a sigh of relief, you manage to find peace and quiet within your mind once more. 

Being able to read minds can be tough, especially when some thoughts others have just simply demand to be heard. The whole reason you came to this school in the first place is to better understand yourself and your powers. So far, it’s been pretty helpful, and you’ve made some good friends along the way. You can’t help but think of the academy as a second home.

“It’s good to be back,” a small smile tugs at your lips as you begin to make your way inside the building.

Turning a few corners, you allow your feet to take you to the room you’ve been staying in during all your previous years here at the academy. You can faintly hear shouts coming from other rooms as people move in, or see their friends for the first time in what feels like ages.

Opening the door to your room, you take a quick look around. Everything appears to have been left exactly in the same spot as before, only now, a thin layer of dust resides on all the shelves. Your father will be by later to drop off all your other things that you’ll need for the year, like spare sheets, towels, and most importantly, your clothes.

Moving over to the shared bathroom, you give a soft knock before opening the door. Giving a quick look around as you flick on the lights, you notice the door to the adjacent room closed. However, in the next moment, it’s flinging open to reveal Jihyo, your roommate for the past two years.

“Oh my goodness, (Y/n)! Is that you?” She squeals, tackling you in a hug and nearly sending the both of you crashing to the floor. 

“Hey, Jihyo,” you chuckle, hugging her back as you steady yourself on your feet.

“Oops, sorry,” she giggles, “I must have got too excited to see you again.”

“It’s been, what? Three or four months?” You smile, quirking a brow as you pull away from her to look into her eyes.

“Seems like forever ago!” She smiles back, eyes crinkling at the sides. “How’ve you been? How was your summer?”

“Not too bad. Though, I wish I didn’t have to spend so much time with Harold,” you roll your eyes slightly, noticing that she shoots a sympathetic look in your direction. “I swear he can do no wrong by our parents.”

“Hey, well, at least you don’t have to see him now for a couple of months,” she says, you nodding along with her statement.

“Yeah, at least,” you sigh, lip quirking slightly. “Anyways, how was your summer? Any big splashes?”

“Will you stop with the water puns?” She rolls hers eyes, exasperated as you simply grin in response. “No, not really, though I did make a wave crash into my cousin at the beach cause she called me a tramp.”

The casual shrug of her shoulders as she says this sends you into a fit of laughter, “remind me not to get on your bad side.”

“Hun, it’s been how many years and I still put up with your water-based puns,” she nudges your shoulder. “You couldn’t get on my bad side even if you tried.”

“You put too much faith in me,” you grin, shaking your head slightly as you cross your arms in front of your chest. “One day you’ll get sick of my puns and leave me for someone more fluid with their words.”

“(Y/n), I swear to god,” a look flashes through Jihyo’s eyes and you jump back into your room before she can smack you. A large smile is on your face as a few giggles slip out, watching her shake her head at you. “You’re lucky I love you.”

“I know,” your voice singsongs, a slight tilt to your head. “Love you, too.”

Before you two can continue your conversation, a knock sounds at your door. Moving over to see who it is, Jihyo casually leans against the side of the bathroom doorframe with her arms crossed. Opening your room door, you’re greeted by your father and brother, both holding two of your bags.

“Hi sweetie! Guess who wanted to tag along to say goodbye one last time!” Your father cheerfully greets you, stepping past you and into your room.

“Oh, hi there, Jihyo,” Harold greets her with a smile, noticing her presence as he steps into your room after your father.

“Hello,” she greets back politely, shooting you a look once both their backs are turned. Your eyes plead for her to stay, but she only sends you an apologetic look. “I’ll leave you all to it then, since you’ll probably want to talk with (Y/n).”

With a final polite smile, she closes the bathroom door in order to retreat into her room, leaving you alone with your dad and brother. You nearly sigh at her thoughts of good luck aimed towards you.

“I think this was everything you wanted me to bring for you,” you father smiles, placing your bags near your bed.

“It should be,” you smile back. “Thanks for bringing this stuff.”

“Of course! If you need anything else, don’t hesitate to phone,” you dad says.

“Well, we won’t keep you for too long then,” Harold says.

“That’s okay,” you reassure him. “Did you want to stay? We could grab dinner and I could show you guys the new west wing of the school if you wanted?”

“Maybe another time, we should probably get back home soon, before the traffic gets really bad,” Harold frowns slightly, along with your father.

“Your brother’s right,” you father sighs. “Maybe we can all come visit you soon though, and stay for the whole day. I do have to drive him back to his university early tomorrow morning anyways.”

“Alright,” you smile, somewhat sadly. “Thanks for bringing my stuff.”

“Of course, sweetie,” your father smiles, pulling you in for a hug. “We’ll talk with you later, okay?”

“Okay, dad,” you mumble into his chest before pulling away.

“Don’t be a stranger,” Harold jokes, pulling you into a hug of his own.

“No promises,” you tease, hugging him back briefly.

Waving a final goodbye, you close your door behind them as they leave. Once the door is closed, you find yourself letting out a sigh.

“You okay?” Jihyo’s voice manages to pull you out of your thoughts.

You turn to look at her, a hint of sadness in your eyes, “yeah, I’ll be fine. I’m used to them not spending time with me anyways. Harold’s more important than I am. Always.”

“(Y/n), you know that’s not true,” she crosses her arms while sending you a firm look. You can practically feel her sympathy radiating off of her before her thoughts even reach you.

“You’re thinking too loudly,” you state, turning around to pull one of your suitcases onto your bed to start unpacking.

You hear her sigh before her mood is shifting to become her usual cheerful self, “well, why don’t we grab food after you’re done unpacking then?”

“Sounds good,” you shoot a smile at her from over your shoulder. “Feel free to keep me company in the mean time.”

“Sure!” She chirps. “Here, why don’t I dust your room while you unpack?”

“That’d be a big help, thanks,” you reply, already opening the drawers to your dresser to start placing your clothes into.

The two of you move around your room soon after, working around each other as you talk about your summers. It feels nice catching up with one of your closest friends, and having her help you clean your room makes the time fly by.

Soon enough, the two of you have finished, and are ready to make your way down to the mess hall in order to grab some dinner. You’re excited to see if any of your other friends have made it back today, or if they’ll be here tomorrow.

Stepping into the mess hall, it seems a little busier than normal at this time of year. Usually, most people move back to the dorms in the upcoming days, but it looks like more moved back early this year. That, and there seems to be a new guy sitting with the most popular group of students.

Your eyes narrow slightly as you walk past, hearing the curious thoughts of the students surrounding the mystery new guy. You manage to catch his eye briefly before turning your attention back to Jihyo. However, a new thought sticks out among the rest - cute.

Seeing as how Jihyo is standing right next to you, you’re assuming she’s caught this new guy’s attention. A subtle smirk pulls at your lips.

“Hey, sounds like the new guy thinks you’re cute,” you nudge her as you step in line to place your orders.

“Shut up, he was totally staring at you,” she responds, nudging you back.

“Who is he, anyways?” You inquire, interest peaked considering the amount of fuss he’s created so far.

“I’m not sure, but give me ten minutes and I’ll let you know,” she answers, looking around the mess hall to see if she can spot anyone else she might know to tell her what’s going on. “Order my usual from last year, I’ll meet you at our spot in a few.”

With that, she leaves you standing in line, off to talk with a few of her friends to update her on the new guy. You watch her walk up to Eric, your friend that you both made last year from your history of mutations class. A slight chuckle escapes your lips as you see them greet each other, almost immediately jumping into a conversation as they not so subtly eye the new guy.

Turning your attention back to the front, you realize that you’re next to order. Placing your orders, you patiently wait for your food to be made, standing off to the side as you quickly check your phone.

Scrolling through your notifications, you’re currently zoned out to the world around you. What you don’t expect though, is to feel a slight bump on your back, followed by a small ‘oof’.

Turning around, you’re met with the apologetic face of the new guy.

“I’m so sorry, I wasn’t watching where I was going,” he says, a nervous look crossing his features.

“No worries,” you smile at him, “no harm done.”

“I’m Jimin, by the way,” he introduces himself, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “The new guy. Or at least one of them.”

“There’s more than one of you?” You quirk a brow questioningly, curious to know of the other new students that have joined the academy this year.

“Well, I’m actually not so sure, but I’d assume so,” he begins to say. “I mean, big school, there are bound to be a few new students every year, right? Unless I’m the only one, then that’d be weird, too, right? Oh god, I’m rambling again, I’m so sorry, I need to stop, oh my god.”

You let out a small chuckle, “it’s alright. I get it, don’t worry. We were all in your shoes at some point or other, being the new kid and all.”

You can practically hear his thoughts running wild just by looking at his face, but at your words, he seems to calm down slightly, even going so far as to breathe a small sigh of relief.

“Thanks,” the corners of his lips twitch upwards. “Anyways, I should probably get going, still got a lot to explore and everything.”

“Well, if you need a tour guide-“ 

He cuts you off before you can continue, eyes widening slightly, “oh, no, that’s okay, I wouldn’t want to trouble you! Thanks though. I’ll see you around.”

With a final smile and a small wave, he’s heading off to join the group of people you saw him with when you walked into the mess hall. You simply smile to yourself, shaking your head slightly as you turn around, hearing your name get called to alert you that your food is ready. You weren’t even going to offer yourself as a tour guide, just wanting to point him in the direction of the campus lead tours they host every year for new students. You let out a small chuckle.

Grabbing the two containers, you make your way over to your usual spot where Jihyo and Eric are already sitting and waiting for you. Placing the two containers down, Jihyo grabs hers, thanking you shortly after.

“So, we saw you talking to the new guy,” she wiggles her brows suggestively at you.

“Yeah, he seems nice,” comes your reply, taking a bite of your food shortly afterwards.

“I was just telling Jihyo here that apparently he comes from the prestigious Park family that practically sits at the head of every governmental council powers are involved in,” Eric tells you, causing you to tilt your head slightly in curiosity. “Apparently, he comes from a family of powerful powers.”

“Has he expressed his gene yet?” You ask, turning to catch one final look at Jimin as he exits the mess hall.

“Apparently not,” Jihyo replies. “That’s why his parents sent him to this academy, in order to assess his skills and find out what kind of mutation he has.”

“So, you’re telling me, he could be just a regular human?” Your brow furrows in confusion, momentarily halting your eating.

“I mean, it’s possible,” Eric replies. “Mutation of a mutation, in some twisted way.”

“Woah,” Jihyo gasps.

“That’s pretty cool though, if you think about it,” you say, continuing to eat in the next moment. “Human or not, that’s still pretty neat.”

“Poor guy, though,” Jihyo adds, causing you and Eric to both look at her. “To have that kind of family, the expectations are probably really high, and considering he hasn’t expressed his gene yet… I can’t even begin to imagine the kind of pressure he must be under.”

“Yeah, fair enough,” Eric nods.

“You never know, maybe he has expressed it, but just no one knows yet,” you shrug, finishing off your dinner.

“That’s true,” Jihyo nods. “Either way, he’s cute and from what (Y/n) says, he seems nice enough. Considering he’s already in with the popular crowd must mean something.”

“Yeah, that he’s part of a major family,” Eric grumbles.

“Careful, Ric, your jealousy is showing,” you tease, watching as he crosses his arms in the next moment.

“I’m not jealous,” he pouts, though his thoughts suggest otherwise.

“Uh-huh, sure you’re not,” Jihyo gets in on the teasing. “It’s okay, we still love you.”

“Yeah,” you nod along reassuringly. “Besides, who else would be able to put up with you.”

“Hey!” He whines, causing both you and Jihyo to burst out laughing.

“We’re only kidding,” she grins, you nodding along with her.

“Yeah, yeah,” he huffs. “You guys would be lost without me.”

At this point, the three of you stand up, seeing as you and Jihyo are finished eating, and make your way out of the mess hall after throwing away your trash. The three of you continue to bicker and tease each other back and forth all the way back to the dorms, smiles never leaving your faces. You’re glad to be back, and glad to see your friends once more.

The next few days are spent with Jihyo and Eric, talking about the upcoming school year, getting resettled into the dorms, as well as catching up with some of your other friends. You’ve just gotten your schedule for the year, and it looks like you have half your classes with Jihyo, and the other half with Eric. Luckily, you all have the same lunch period and free time.

You haven’t run into the new guy, Jimin, lately, so you’re assuming he’s been hanging around with the popular kids all this time. They usually don’t reappear or show up until the first day of classes anyways.

The night before classes start, you’re just heading back to your room with Jihyo when you notice the room across from you still vacant. You send her a questioning look, since it’d odd to not have all the dorm rooms filled, especially the once across from yours considering it’s one of the biggest on this floor.

“Maybe whoever is moving in is late this year cause they’re on vacation?” Jihyo suggests.

“Maybe,” you shrug. “Or maybe there’s an actual empty room for once.”

“That’s true,” she nods.

The two of you enter your room at this, letting the door fall shut behind you. With a sigh, you plop onto your bed while Jihyo sits in your desk chair, spinning around to face you.

“Oh, I’ve been meaning to tell you something!” She says, an excited look crossing her face, of which you nod for her to continue. “Apparently, that new kid, Jimin or whatever, has been asking about you.”

“Really now?” You quirk a brow. “Why the hell would he be doing that, it’s not like we talked for longer than a few minutes.”

“He probably thinks you’re cute!” Jihyo winks. “I told you he was staring at you that night in the mess hall.”

“Doesn’t mean he thinks I’m cute,” you joke with a slight roll of your eyes.

“Still, don’t be surprised if he finds you to ask you out sometime soon,” she wiggles her brows suggestively.

“Jihyo, it’s only the beginning of the year, I doubt anything like that is going to happen so soon,” you huff.

“So, you’d like it if he asked you out?” She smirks, and you can hear her raunchy thoughts teasing you.

“Well, maybe, but I hardly know him,” you reply, throwing one of your pillows at her since she’s started chuckling at you. “Oh, shut up, it’s not like that.”

“Then what is it like?” She teases.

You let out a sigh, “Jihyo.”

“(Y/n),” she mirrors the exasperation in your tone, looking at you expectantly.

“I talked to him for five minutes, it means nothing!” You defend yourself.

“Mmhmm,” she hums, “sure it doesn’t.”

“It’s not like I like him like that, I don’t know him,” you repeat. “The semester hasn’t even begun, so all I can do is just take it day by day.”

“Fair enough,” she nods at you, leaning back deeper into your chair.

With that, the two of you move on to another topic, talking late into the night until Jihyo retreats to her room to sleep. You bid her a goodnight and that you’ll see her tomorrow for class. Once you’ve finished getting ready for bed, you climb under the covers, thinking about what tomorrow will bring. You can’t wait to see who else is in your classes, and you hope that the semester goes by quickly.

The next morning, you groggily pull yourself out of bed. You silently curse yourself for staying up so late last night as you get ready for the day. A soft knock on your door manages to pull you from your thoughts. Opening your door reveals both Eric and Jihyo standing in the hallway with smiles on their faces.

“Ready for breakfast?” Eric asks.

“Ready as I’ll ever be,” you reply with a smile, stepping into the hallway with your bag and shutting the door behind you.

The three of you make your way to the mess hall, talking amongst yourselves. Once you’ve all grabbed food, you’re sitting in your usual spot.

“Don’t look now, but it looks like someone is staring at you,” Jihyo nudges your arm while motioning across the hall with her head.

Your brow furrows as you look up from your food and over to where Jihyo has directed your attention. You do your best to drown out the voices of all the students in the hall, both in your head and not, as your gaze zeroes in on Jimin. Once he notices he’s been caught staring, he looks away quickly, and you swear you hear a loud ‘shit’ in your head as he looks away, embarrassed. 

“I told you he’s interested in you!” Jihyo squeals.

“Wait, what?” This time it’s Eric’s brow that furrows in confusion. “Who are you talking about?”

With that, he turns around to see if he can catch a glimpse of whoever was staring at you.

“Jihyo insists that the new guy, Jimin, has a thing for me,” you huff, clearly amused as you lean back in your chair.

“Maybe he does,” Eric shrugs, turning back around to face you. “You never know. You could always do some snooping you know.”

“You know I would never willingly read someone’s thoughts, that’s an invasion of privacy,” you respond, eyes narrowing slightly at him for even suggesting that.

“Okay, okay,” he raises his hands in defence. “My bad.”

“Anyways, we should get to class,” Jihyo says, collecting her things and standing up.

You simply nod your head in agreement, standing up with her and gathering your own things, “see you later, Ric.”

He sends the two of you a final wave goodbye as you make your way out of the mess hall and towards your first class of the day. The whole time, you can feel a pair of eyes burning into the back of your head, causing a shiver to run down your spine. You wonder if it was Jimin who returned to staring at you. You shake your head in order to clear your thoughts. You have more important things to worry about right now.

The first few classes you have pass by fairly quickly for you, and before you know it, it’s lunchtime. Both you and Jihyo meet Eric in the mess hall once more to eat. The three of you joke around, and you double check your bag to make sure you have everything you need for your next class. With a loud sigh, you realize you forgot your textbook.

“I forgot the fucking textbook,” you voice your thoughts to your friends. “I have to run back to my room to grab it quickly, but I’ll meet you in class, okay Ric?”

“Yeah, for sure,” he nods at you as you stand up.

“Save me a seat, will you?” You grin, tossing your bag over your shoulder and seeing him nod out of the corner of your eyes.

“See you soon,” he calls before turning back to talk with Jihyo.

Walking quickly, you weave your way through the halls of the school and back to your dorm room. Once you unlock your door, you grab the textbook you forgot earlier and head off to class. Checking your phone for the time, you see you still have a few minutes to spare, so you no longer have to rush as much as you were before.

Just as you reach the classroom, you manage to bump into someone coming out from the class. You let out a small ‘oof’ before apologizing for not watching where you’re going.

A chuckle reaches your ears, “it’s alright, I wasn’t watching where I was walking either.”

“Oh, Jimin,” you shoot him a polite smile, hearing his thoughts of amusement run through his head, “are you in this class, too?”

“Yep,” he returns your smile, eyes forming little crescents. You can’t help but let out a small chuckle at his happy thoughts of actually knowing another person in his class.

“Anyways, I’m going to head inside now,” you say, stepping around him without another word. You notice his eyes following you even after you walk over to Eric who has so graciously saved you a seat.

“Damn, looks like you have a thing for literally running into guys who like you,” Eric teases once you sit down.

“Shut up, I wasn’t paying attention,” you nudge his arm slightly before pulling out your supplies for the class.

Eric only hums in response, eyes twinkling in amusement, to which you roll your own. You barely know Jimin, it’s not like that at all.

Meanwhile, Jimin stands outside in the hallway for a few more moments, thinking over the past two interactions he’s had with you. You’ve definitely caught his eye, especially since you didn’t throw yourself at him the first chance you saw him, or talked to him for that matter. You actually treated him like a person, not some prodigal son from the Park family.

He begins to make his way to the snack area to grab the drink he originally came out to get, thinking over what he felt when he touched you. He could feel the slight guilt and annoyance that comes with bumping into someone, but once you saw it was him, your feelings shifted. He could sense the curiosity and slight nervousness in you, as well as intrigue. Just like the first time he bumped into you, though this time, you got shy. 

Entering the classroom once more after he’s gotten his drink, a smile tugs at his lips. Maybe you like him like he’s starting to like you. He doesn’t know much about you, and you don’t know much about him, but you don’t seem to hold any high expectations of him. He doesn’t even know what kind of powers you possess, and he doesn’t want to be rude and just straight up ask you. He hates it when people do that to him, and he hates it even more that he has to lie every time.

Jimin, although coming from a powerful family of Powers, has what his parents consider a ‘weak’ power. He’s able to feel and understand a person’s emotions when touching them. Everything they feel, he feels, if he’s touching them, that is. However, his family doesn’t consider being an empath anything extraordinary, so he’s been told to hide what he is, to be ashamed.

This is why he hates when people expect so much of him, or are only friends with him cause of his name. His family is nothing special, just a bunch of entitled Powers who think they’re better than everyone else. He only really has one real friend, and that’s Taehyung, who luckily, also goes to this academy. This is also why he likes you so much already. He knows you won’t treat him any different than anyone else just because of his family name.

He’s used to it by now, though, so he’s able to play along with the people who only give him attention due to his name. It does get tiring, pretending all the time, but that’s why he’s so intrigued with you. He feels as if he’ll never need to pretend with you, as crazy as that sounds. What he does know, is that he wants to get closer to you, and maybe, just maybe, take you out sometime. The first step, is becoming your friend.

“Took you long enough,” Taehyung jokes once Jimin returns to his seat before the start of class, successfully pulling the aforementioned boy out of his thoughts. “Saw you ran into that girl that’s caught your eye, how’d that go?”

Jimin lets out a small sigh at the suggestive wiggle of Taehyung’s eyebrows, “I’ve only just met her, Tae. We just happened to bump into each other again.”

“Right, and that’s the reason you haven’t taken your eyes off of her since you’ve sat down,” Taehyung nudges him with his elbow.

At this, Jimin’s eyes widen. He hadn’t noticed he’d been staring at you, for his gaze naturally drifted towards where you’re sitting with your one guy friend. Well, he only hopes he’s just a friend.

“Do you know anything about her?” Jimin inquires, sitting up straighter as he watches you laugh at something the boy beside you has said.

“Just the same as you, that her name is (Y/n), and she’s been going to this academy for a few years,” Taehyung shrugs. “I know the guy that’s sitting beside her is Eric, he’s in one of my morning classes.”

Jimin simply hums in response, attention now being drawn to the front at the arrival of the professor. His mind begins to wander again as the professor introduces their course content for the semester. He has one more class after this, and he hopes that it’s also with you, so he can get another chance to talk with you, and try and become closer with you. He’s just in the middle of wondering what powers you possess when the prof’s words manage to pull him out of his thoughts.

“There will be a final assignment this term, of which you will work in pairs and give a presentation on what you’ve researched at the end of the semester,” at the shifting and murmurs starting up in the room, the professor continues, “I will be picking your partners, so you should all look forward to working with someone new. The sooner you know your partner and your topic, the better, hence why I will be assigning the groups before the end of class. I expect a topic to be chosen by Monday next week, that way you have the weekend to discuss with your partner what you’d like to work on from the approved topics. Have two backups ready incase you don’t get your first choice.”

You let out a sigh as you jot down ‘Monday, topic due’ for this class. You wonder who your partner will be, and unfortunately, you don’t think you’ll be lucky enough to get partnered with Eric.

Since the start of class, you’ve been zoning out everyone’s thoughts, wanting to not only practice this skill, but also not have to listen to everyone thinking at once. You’re glad you learned this technique last year, now, you only need to perfect it.

Soon enough, it nears the end of class and the prof starts calling out the partners for the final assignment. They explained that the final is worth eighty percent of your entire grade, the other twenty percent on attendance and participation. This only causes your anxiety to skyrocket, hating that your mark weighs heavily on one thing only. You just hope you get paired with someone decent and who doesn’t slack off.

“Eric and Taehyung,” they call, followed by, “(Y/n) and Jimin.”

At this, some heads turn to face you while some turn to face Jimin. You glance over to see he’s already staring at you with a smile on his face, so you send him one back. At least it’s someone you’ve actually met before, albeit briefly.

Class ends shortly after the last names are called, and you notice Jimin and his friend heading towards you and Eric.

“Hey,” Jimin greets you once they’re close enough.

“Hey, fancy seeing you here,” you joke, and you notice his friend grinning at your response.

“I’m Taehyung, by the way, and I believe you’re my partner,” he says, turning to look at Eric beside you.

“I’m Eric, nice to meet you,” Eric nods in greeting.

The two of them start to talk about class and the project, Eric calling an ‘I’ll see you next class’ over his shoulder as he walks down the hall with Taehyung.

“Damn, they really hit it off,” you laugh, gathering the last of your things and slinging your bag over your shoulder.

“No kidding,” Jimin replies, letting out a huff of amusement. “So, partners?”

“Well, yeah,” you grin, “we kind of have to be.”

“True, true,” he hums as the two of you make your way out into the hall. “What’s your next class?”

“I’ve got practical training with Eric, what about you?” You reply, glancing at him from the corner of your eyes.

“History of mutations, upper year one,” he tells you, to which you nod.

“I have that in the mornings with Jihyo,” you say.

“Here, how about we exchange numbers so we can talk about this assignment more when we’re both free,” he suggests, and you don’t need to hear his thoughts to see the hope shining in his eyes.

You giggle, “sure.”

Stepping to the side of the hallway, you both input your numbers into the other’s phone. Checking the time on your phone once you get it back, your eyes widen slightly. You’ve only got three minutes to get to class now, so you wave goodbye to Jimin and head on your way.

Jimin watches your form disappear around the corner with a sigh. He was hoping that you two would have the last class of the day together as well, but it looks like luck isn’t on his side. Oh well, at least he has your number now.

That night, you receive a text from Jimin asking you if you’re free Saturday to possibly discuss the project in full. You agree without question, letting him know that the sooner you get this done, the better.

Saturday comes and you end up meeting Jimin in the little café by the school gardens. It’s a beautiful day so you both decide to sit outside and enjoy the sunshine before the weather takes a turn for the worse.

Luckily, the two of you manage to decide on a topic pretty quickly, and choosing your two backups is a breeze. So far, the two of you have been sitting by the rose bushes for almost two hours now, falling into a natural conversation after deciding on what you’ll do for your project.

The whole time, Jimin watches you speak with a twinkle in his eyes. He can tell you’re not afraid of being honest with him and actually talking to him instead of trying to impress him like so many others. He enjoys getting to know you, and he likes how you listen to what he has to say, and actually respond to it instead of just agreeing with everything like so many others.

While you’ve been talking, you’ve also been working hard to maintain your silence in your head, making sure not to allow any stray thoughts from anyone into your mind. You’re pretty proud of yourself, so far, you’ve been able to maintain it and not give yourself a headache. Granted, there aren’t too many people around thinking loudly, which you couldn’t be more grateful for.

From what you’ve observed of Jimin so far, you can tell he’s a bit more reserved than he wants people to think. This only makes you think he’s hiding something, but his business is his own and he seems like a decent guy, so it can’t be anything bad. Maybe he’s just a shy person underneath everything. Either way, you enjoy spending time with him.

Currently, he’s nodding along intently to everything you have to say, eyes trailing over your face occasionally. He enjoys watching you, noting all the little quirks you have when you tell a story. He can’t even help himself when his eyes begin to drift towards your lips, wondering how they’d feel against his own, and if it’d be too early to make a move. Unfortunately for him, he doesn’t register the small shift in your voice.

“Oh, hi Jimin!” A voice interrupts you mid-sentence as you’re telling Jimin about your first year at the academy.

He turns his head, and you notice his eyes droop slightly in recognition, though his fake smile fools the girl easily enough, “oh, hi Sharen.”

“I saw you sitting by the roses and I just knew I had to come say hello,” she giggles, twirling a strand of her hair with her finger.

Checking your phone for the time, you shift uncomfortably. Sharen is one of the most popular Powers of the school. She has the ability to control plants, of which you were envious of in first year, before you got to know how rude she is to everyone who doesn’t have an elemental power.

“Oh shit, it’s getting late,” you say, your chair making a small scraping noise as you push it back to stand up. “I better get going.”

“No, wait, (Y/n),” Jimin goes to stop you, but Sharen gets in his way.

“It was nice talking with you, let me know when you’re free to work more on the project,” you shoot him a tight smile before rushing off, not wanting to remain under her scrutinizing gaze any longer.

Jimin hardly gets to watch you leave as Sharen steps into his line of vision once more, going on and on about something he really doesn’t care about. He sits back in his chair, defeated, but also irritated at Sharen for interrupting such a nice time he was having with you. Now, he zones her out, thinking about you, and how this evening could have went instead.

Maybe he could have invited you back to his dorm to watch a movie, getting to know each other more. He was hoping to at least graze your arm and get a sense of how you feel around him, but it looks like that will have to wait for a while longer. Even though he’s only known you for about a week, he can tell he’s starting to fall, and fall hard.

Instead, in order to keep up the appearance he’s created for himself, he watches Sharen, now in your spot ramble on about how powerful and in control of her powers she is. He nearly rolls his eyes at this, for he couldn’t care less. He hears enough of this shit at home.

Using the same strategy you just did, he checks his phone, but instead, he acts like he’s gotten a text from his parents. He goes to leave, but Sharen grabs his arm and he hates how he can suddenly feel her emotions. She’s disappointed, but also curious, not to mention interested in him. That much is clear even without him being an empath.

“You know, I’m here for you Jimin,” she says, attempting to be sincere but coming across as fake as she is to everyone else. “If you ever need somebody, for any reason, anything at all, I’m here.”

He nearly shivers in disgust at the shift in emotions he feels come from her, as well as the double meaning of her words. He’d rather stick a thorn in palm of his hand, and then set it on fire.

Still, he politely thanks her before taking off back to his dorm room for the evening. Appearances are everything, or so he’s been conditioned to believe. If you can’t make friends of your enemies, you’ll never be able to get far in this life.

The next month passes by fairly quickly, and before you know it, midterms have arrived. Luckily for you, both you and Jimin managed to get your first topic choice for your project, so you’re grateful for that. You’ve been meeting every Saturday for an hour or two to discuss the project and do some research on your topic, and you’ve both grown closer during this time.

You’ve caught some of his stray thoughts around you when he begins to think too loudly, and even though you do your best to block him out, it doesn’t work. Some thoughts just want to be heard, not to mention the ones that people want you to hear. Though, you doubt he wants you to hear him thinking about kissing you, or even giving you a lingering hug. It’s just a simple crush, at least, that’s what you tell yourself.

He hasn’t made any type of move yet, so you can safely say you’re not leading him on. Nor have you given him false hope, for you’ve never really talked about relationships before, and you’d like to keep it that way for as long as possible. Besides, you can tell Sharen has the hots for him, and the last thing you need is to become the target for her incessant bullying by ‘getting in her way.’

Speaking of Sharen, she seems to always appear wherever you and Jimin are working. Whether it be the garden café on the last few nicer days of the season, the library, or even the mess hall, she has a habit of showing up either in the middle of your research sessions, or near the end. One time she even turned up right at the beginning and you couldn’t even get any work done. 

She always has a way of getting into your head, and every time, you can hear her spewing insults and laughing at you. It’s getting quite tiresome, honestly, having to deal with her throwing herself at Jimin, and acting like a child. It doesn’t take a telepath like you to know how uncomfortable he is when she shows up. Unfortunately, she cannot take a hint.

Jimin, for one, could not be happier about spending more time with you. He knows all this time spent with one another is only making what he feels for you stronger. He really wants to ask you what your power is, since he still doesn’t know, but he holds off ever time. He’ll wait until you’re ready, he doesn’t want to push your trust.

However, every time Sharen comes along he gets closer and closer to blowing his facade. She makes him so irritable, and he hates being able to feel her attraction to him grow every time she touches him. He swears that she’s become obsessed.

The final straw for him is when she follows him back to his dorm room one evening despite the fact that he’s told her he has an important call with his parents. He sent a text to Taehyung while heading back to his room just in case, using the pretence of texting his parents to make sure Sharen didn’t suspect anything.

Once he gets to his room, he tells her, somewhat through gritted teeth, that he needs to be alone now. He opens his door only to be pushed into his room by her, and he shudders at the lust he feels seeping through her skin.

“Okay, I’m going to be level with you,” she begins, holding his wrists in her hands as she pins him to the wall, “I’ve had my eyes on you since the minute you walked into this goddamn academy, and for some reason, you’ve ignored every single fucking advance I’ve made. I want you, but you don’t want me. Why is that?”

He figures it’s a rhetorical question, but he answers anyways, “I’m sorry, Sharen, I don’t like you in that way. I think you’re a nice girl, but-“

“But what?” She nearly shrieks, grip tightening on his wrists. “Am I not good enough for you? For the mighty Park,” the way she spits his family’s name makes him cringe.

“No, that’s not it,” he shakes his head, counting the seconds that tick by the longer she has him in her hold.

“Then what is it? Huh?” She tilts her head, eyes wide. “Don’t tell me someone else has caught your eye, I’m the hottest piece of ass in this place.” He remains quiet, and he can feel her anger and jealousy before they flash in her eyes. “Don’t tell me you’ve fallen for that bitch, what was her name again…” she takes a moment to think, which only causes Jimin’s own anger to flare, “oh yeah, (Y/n). That good for nothing, bitch.”

“She’s better than you,” he snaps, eyes narrow as he glares at her.

“Excuse me,” she seethes, face contorting in anger.

“You heard me,” he spits back. “Now, get off of me.”

“I don’t think so,” she smirks, stepping closer to his body and pushing him further into the wall.

“You’re going to loosen your grip and let go of him slowly while backing away,” a deep voice breaks through the tension in the room.

Turning his head, Jimin nods in thanks to Taehyung as he uses his hypnotic voice on Sharen. Her eyes glaze over and she does what she’s been told. 

“Thanks man,” Jimin says, rubbing his now red wrists to ease some of the pain in them. “I had a feeling she was going to try something.”

“Come on, let’s go tell the dean,” Taehyung motions down the hallway with his head, turning to Sharen in the next moment to instruct her what to do next while he still has her in a trance. “You’re going to come with us and tell the dean what you’ve done, and what you’ve said here tonight.”

Almost robotically, she nods her head, slowly walking out of the room and leading the way to the dean’s office. The two boys follow behind her, silently conversing with each other the whole way about what they’re going to do once they reach the office. Jimin already has a plan in mind, and he just hopes he can pull it off.

About a week ago, he remembers you saying something about the room across from yours remaining vacant for the school year. If he plays his cards right, he’s hoping to be able to move rooms. That way, he can be closer to you.

The next morning, you’re awoken to the sounds of something being moved outside your dorm room. Groggily getting out of bed to see what the commotion is all about, you open your door. It takes a moment to register that the door to the room across from yours is open, and a figure can be seen moving stuff around on the inside while some suitcases still reside in the hallway.

“Oh, good morning (Y/n),” Jimin says, shooting you a smile once he sees you standing in your doorway looking at him through sleepy eyes.

“Jimin? Is that you? What’s going on?” You rub your eyes, thinking you’re still dreaming, considering you swear you’ve heard Jimin’s voice in your head echoing the word beautiful a few times.

“You would not believe the night I’ve had,” he chuckles, grabbing his last few suitcases and rolling them into his new room.

“I really can’t even try and guess what could have possibly happened,” you say through a yawn. “What made you change rooms?”

“Well,” he pauses, taking a moment to look down the hallway to make sure no one is eavesdropping. “Sharen assaulted me last night.”

At his words, your eyes fling open, “oh my god, are you okay?”

“Fine, now, thank you,” he smiles faintly at your concern. “Luckily, it was only her grabbing my wrists and acting intimidating. Also lucky I sent a text to my friend Taehyung that she was giving me bad vibes and to come rescue me.”

“Lucky indeed,” you nod. “Still, why the sudden change of rooms?”

“Well, I felt uncomfortable staying in a room where she knows is located, considering what she did last night,” he says, and you nod once more in understanding.

“Yeah, that’s true,” you agree, crossing your arms in front of your chest as you lean against the doorframe. “Do you need any help unpacking?”

“Oh, no! I couldn’t possibly bother you any more than I have,” he replies, looking slightly embarrassed.

“Are you sure? I don’t mind keeping you some company,” you smile reassuringly at him. “Especially after the night you’ve had.”

“Only if you want to,” he replies, a blush rising to his cheeks as he thinks about you finally being in his room, even if it’s one he hasn’t even slept in himself yet.

“Sure, let me put on a sweater first,” you send him another smile before retreating back into your room to grab the aforementioned item of clothing. Not even a minute later, you’re exiting your dorm room and crossing the threshold into his. “Did you want me to close the door?”

“It’s up to you,” he replies, placing books on his desk. He wants you to decide what you’re most comfortable with, though he’d prefer it if you closed the door.

It’s like you read his thoughts, for he hears the soft click of the door closing in the next moment. He smirks to himself. Finally, he’s alone with you in his room.

You opted to close the door to give him some privacy from anyone who could walk down the hallway. You figure he probably doesn’t want people snooping in his business, considering the night he’s had. You also make sure to put your mind barrier up before anything else, just in case he has some stray thoughts. You don’t want to invade his privacy.

“Well, at least this’ll make it easier for when we want to work on our assignment,” you joke, successfully lightening the mood as you hear him let out a laugh.

“For sure,” he smiles. “Just so you know, you’re welcome in my room anytime.”

“Thanks,” you reply with a smile of your own. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

With that you offer to help him unpack once more, but he insists you simply keep him company. Sighing while shaking your head, you climb onto his unmade bed and sit against the wall. The two of you continue to make conversation with each other as he unpacks, and before you know it, it’s lunchtime.

Jimin suggests getting lunch together, but you politely decline. After all, you have some assignments you need to get done for tomorrow, plus you want to take a nap. You’re still tired from being woken up so early this morning. However, you fail to see the small pout that resides on his lips as you exit his room to retreat back into your own.

The next month flies by just as the previous one did, during which time the whole school found out about Sharen assaulting Jimin. Needless to say, she’s no longer in with the popular crowd. You’ve grown closer to Jimin still, but you’ve noticed his thoughts have become more prominent every time you’re with him, and they always seem to concern you. You do your best to block them out, but it’s as if he wants everyone to hear them. There’s no way he knows about your powers, at least, you don’t think so. However, you can never know for sure.

It’s currently Friday afternoon, and you’re sitting in your class which you share with both Eric and Jimin. You, as usual, sit beside Eric for the class, and the two of you are discussing plans for next weekend, seeing as it will be Jihyo’s birthday. 

Jimin cannot help but glare at Eric as he makes you laugh once more, gripping his pencil so hard that it snaps. He’s been finding that he grows jealous easily over you lately, and he knows he should ask you out soon, before it gets out of hand. He can’t help the dark thoughts that crawl into his mind, especially at night, whispering that only he should be able to have you to himself. Nobody else deserves you, and no one else understands him like you do. You’re the only one for him, the only person he can envision a happy future with.

“Woah, dude, are you okay?” Taehyung’s voice manages to pull Jimin out of his ever consuming thoughts about you.

“Fine,” Jimin clears his throat, grabbing a new pencil out of his bag as he tosses the now broken one away.

“You don’t seem fine,” his best friend quirks a brow, gaze drifting in the direction Jimin’s is in to see what has his attention. “Ah, I see. Trouble in paradise?”

“I’m not in the mood to be teased right now, Taehyung,” Jimin says, clearly irritated.

“What? She reject you?” Taehyung muses, and that thought alone nearly sets Jimin off, yet he manages to remain calm. His emotions are all over the place lately, and he has a feeling he knows why.

You’ve been subtly pulling away from Jimin since the beginning of the week. He doesn’t know what he’s done wrong, and he can’t figure out why you’ve been avoiding him. It doesn’t help that you’ve been hanging around with your friends more than usual. Only he deserves your attention, and now that you’re barely giving him any, he wants it all. 

You’re scheduled to finish up the final touches on your project tomorrow with him, and he just hopes you don’t rush out. He wants to know what he did so he can fix it. He wants you.

The next twenty-four hours feel like absolute agony to him, for they pass by extremely slow. You’re supposed to come to his room around six to finish up the project, and he can hardly wait. He grabbed some food earlier just incase you’re hungry when you come over. Even if it’s in the smallest ways, he wants you to know that he’s thinking of you, that he can provide for you and take care of you.

At long last, a knock sounds at his door at six o’clock, and he practically springs off of his bed to let you into his room. Just like the first time he saw you, you manage to take his breath away. You’re so beautiful, and soon, you’ll be all his.

“Hey, you ready to finish this monster?” You smirk, stepping into his room with your laptop held in your arms.

“More than you could ever believe,” he responds, and he smiles as he hears you laugh.

“Oh, come on, I can’t be that horrible to work with, can I?” You tease, and he tenses slightly as the door falls shut. 

Is that what you think? Is that the reason you’ve been avoiding him? Do you think he’ll want nothing to do with you once you’ve finished this assignment? To him, the idea is preposterous, but doubt starts to cloud his mind. He would never let you go again if he got the option, but he needs to make you his first, and let you know that he’ll always want you. You, and only you.

“Of course not!” He replies, eyes wide. “You’ve been the best partner I could have hoped for!”

“Phew,” you wipe imaginary sweat off of your forehead in mock relief, “and here I was, worried for nothing.”

The two of you share a laugh, smiles on both your faces until Jimin breaks the small silence that’s settled over the two of you.

“Hey, uh, I was wondering if you wanted to stay and watch a movie or something after we’re finished?” he asks, suddenly nervous you’ll say no. “You know, as a sort of celebration for completing the assignment?”

“Yeah, sure,” you nod, a soft smile gracing your features. “Sounds good to me.”

“Great!” Comes out a little bit too enthusiastically, which has him clearing his throat in the next moment, “shall we, then?”

“We shall,” you reply with a nod, and in the next moment, the two of you are sitting around his desk finishing off the final touches of your presentation.

About an hour passes by and you lean back in your chair, stretching your arms above your head as you let out a groan. Jimin can’t help but glance down at the small piece of skin that gets revealed to him near your stomach when you do this. He licks his lips and swallows hard.

“Well, that should do it!” You grin, letting your hands fall to your lap as you turn your gaze to him.

“I’m so glad we’re done!” He mirrors your grin.

“Ugh, an I ever tired,” you groan, standing up from your chair only to flop on top of his bed.

“Me too,” he says, joining you on the bed.

He lays on his side, staring at your figure as your chest rises and falls with every breath you take. So badly he wants to reach over and cup your cheek with his hand, leaning over to kiss you to celebrate a job well done. He settles on memorizing your features for now.

“You got any snacks, I’m starving,” you say, sitting up in order to shift your position to leaning against the wall.

“Huh? Oh, yeah,” he shakes his head, seemingly distracted.

Standing up, he pops open his mini-fridge as well as a small cupboard filled with various foods and drinks. He notices your expression of awe and can’t help but smile. A warmth fills his chest at knowing he’s made you speechless, in a good way. Of which he hopes to do many times tonight, and throughout the rest of your lives.

“Are those what I think they are?” You gasp, hopping off the bed to pull out a familiar red package which contains your favourite snacks from when you were a kid. Your eyes sparkle with nostalgia as you rip open the package, “gosh, I haven’t had these since I was a kid. My parents would always take me and my brother to the cottage in the summer and would buy these for us for the car ride.”

“You have a brother?” He inquires, face reflecting the surprise he feels. In all the weeks you’ve been getting to know each other, you’ve not once mentioned having a brother.

Immediately, your expression falls, “yeah.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, I guess that might be a tender subject for you, given that you haven’t mentioned him before,” Jimin says, face showing clear concern for you at how sad you look all of a sudden. He lets the door to the fridge fall shut.

“No, it’s okay,” you shake your head, lips twitching upwards briefly. “It’s not like he’s dead.”

You take a seat on the edge of his bed, snacks still held in your hand. You lean forwards slightly, staring at the floor.

“What happened?” He sits beside you, close, but not too close. “If you’re okay with telling me, of course.”

“I haven’t heard from him or my parents since they dropped my off here at school,” you begin, biting your lower lip. “Ever since they found out I had powers, they’ve treated me differently. They’re nice enough to my face and for appearances sake, but they always treat him better. He’s the normal one in a normal family. He got into a good school, kept good grades, always did what they wanted him to. They always cared more about him than me, and he knows it. He knows he’s better than me.”

“Oh, sweetheart, you know that’s not true,” he places a gentle hand on your shoulder in comfort, and he’s hit with a wave of emotions. Sadness, anger, bitterness, resentment.

“It is, though. He’s told me so himself,” you chuckle humourlessly as tears dot your vision. You don’t know why you’re getting so worked up over your family all of a sudden. Maybe it’s because you’ve kept it all bottled up inside since you’ve been dropped off at school this year. You continue, “my parents thought I was crazy when I was a child. So much so that they shamed me for the power I developed, and I don’t like having it. I’m not normal to them, I’m a mistake.”

“You are not a mistake,” his voice is soft, comforting, as his hand draws small circles on your back. He can feel your sadness growing with each passing second, and he’ll do anything to cheer you up, but he doesn’t know how. “You’re one of the smartest people I know. You’re beautiful and caring, both inside and out. I’m glad I met you, for I feel like you’re the only one who truly knows me, and sees me for who I am. You’re special, and you shouldn’t let anyone take that away from you.”

You send him a weak smile, “thanks Jimin, thats very sweet of you.”

“And hey, I’ll let you in on a little secret,” he takes a deep breath, “I’ve known my power since I was eight, but my parents were so ashamed it wasn’t a power like theirs that they shamed me into hiding it from others. People expect so much from me because of my family, but I’m just me. Just like you’re just you, and you shouldn’t change a goddamn thing about yourself because to me, you’re perfect.”

“Jimin, I’m so sorry,” you meet his gaze, and he can sense the slight shift in your emotions at his words. “Your parents are wrong. I’m sure your power is wonderful no matter what it is.”

“Empathy,” a small smile tugs at his lips. “I’m an empath.”

“That’s perfect,” you smile at him, and his heart soars. “How does it-“

“Work?” He finishes for you, and at seeing your curious nod, he continues, “through touch. When I touch someone, I can feel exactly what they’re feeling.”

“Oh,” you say, glancing at where his hand is, now touching your shoulder.

“Don’t worry, it was more for comfort than wanting to know what you were feeling,” he assures you, and you nod slowly.

You meet his gaze once more, “thank you for sharing that with me.”

“Thank you for telling me about your brother,” he replies, staring deeply into your eyes.

He can feel your emotions changing, the sadness becoming drowned out by a feeling of comfort and calm, but also, nervousness. He wants to pry deeper, to know everything you’re feeling in this moment, but he dwells at the surface, not wanting to overstep his boundaries at the moment. The two of you have just shared an intimate, emotional experience with each other, and he doesn’t want to ruin it.

His heart nearly beats out of his chest when he notices you glance down at his lips. He can feel the curiosity growing in you, the spark of interest, and he cannot let this opportunity go to waste. This is his chance, and he takes it.

Slowly, so as not to scare you away, he trails his hand to your lower back, shifting closer to you ever so slightly. He begins to lean in, and he can feel the anticipation building within you. Your eyes flutter closed.

The moment his lips meet yours, it feels as if fireworks are igniting within his entire body. The feeling of your lips against his feels so natural, so right, that he never wants it to end. He pulls you closer, bringing his other hand up to cup your cheek gently, stroking his thumb over your skin. This is all he’s ever dreamed of, and more.

Deepening the kiss, he hears the snack bag in your hands fall to the floor, pushing you back onto his bed as he settles on top of you. His heart races in his chest and he has to pull away to catch his breath. Staring deeply into your eyes, he smiles, diving in for another kiss, much more heated this time around.

The two of you lay there for a few minutes, simply letting your lips explore the other. He can’t help but smirk at the gasp you let out when you feel him bite down on your neck, nibbling softly on the skin. He wants to mark you all over tonight, and make sure that when everyone sees the marks he’s left on you, they know that you’re his.

He pulls away, and he can sense some hesitance on your part, reluctance swirling beneath the surface of your skin that’s come on so suddenly. He parts from your body when he feels your hands on his chest pushing him off of you, confusion evident on his face.

Rolling onto his side, concern crosses his features as he watches you get up from his bed. Immediately, he sits up, thinking he’s done something to upset you when all he wants is for you to be back in his arms.

“(Y/n), I-“

“I should really go,” you cut him off before he can say anything else. “It’s late. Goodnight.” 

With that, you’re grabbing your laptop and exiting his room without a single glance back at him. 

To say Jimin is stunned would be an understatement. He thought things were going well between the two of you and that opening up to each other was a sign you trusted one another. He thought you were making progress, he thought you were finally becoming his.

A groan of frustration escapes his lips as he falls back onto his pillow. For a fleeting minute, you were his, laying beneath him, letting out the cutest sounds for him, and only him. Yet something, something scared you away.

Maybe he moved too fast at first, or was expecting too much from you. God, he’d never force you into anything like that. Never in a million years; he’d hate himself if that ever happened. He just hopes that you know that.

Letting out a sigh, he stares at his ceiling. Sleep won’t come easily to him tonight, not with these thoughts of you racing through his head, and most certainly not when only minutes ago he had you in his bed, beneath him, kissing you.

He closes his eyes, recalling the soft feel of your lips against his, the way you tasted. How he wishes it could have lasted longer, that he could have shown you exactly how he feels for you. So badly he wants you to know that you’re the only one for him, the only one he loves, the only one he’ll ever love.

He lets his mind wander, allowing for images of how the night could have went to fill his mind and take over his senses until the only thing he can think of, is you.

Meanwhile, you quickly get ready for bed once you’re back in your own room, making sure to double check the lock on your door before sliding underneath the covers. Your eyes are wide open as you stare at your ceiling, recalling exactly the moment that made you hightail and book it out of Jimin’s room.

Your mental block was up, but it began to slip the longer Jimin kissed you, causing you to lose your grip on reality. Just as you were getting ready to let the barricade drop, seeing as you trusted him, a wave of possessive thoughts entered your mind.

To say you were shocked would be an understatement. The darkness you felt surrounding his thoughts scared you. Never have you heard, or felt, anything like it before. You worried for yourself and what he might have done once he actually got you to himself. You’re not even dating, and he’s having these kinds of thoughts where just a glimpse at them has you running away.

Now, you’re pulled out of your own thoughts about the matter when you hear your name being whispered in your mind. It sounds like Jimin, and you have no idea how he’s managed to penetrate your walls.

You concentrate, focussing on strengthening your mental blockade, and it works for a few minutes until another call of your name breaks through. Furrowing your brow, you wonder how he’s managing to do such a thing, for you know he’s not a telepath, and you’re pretty sure he doesn’t know that you’re one.

With each passing moment, you can feel his thoughts getting louder, getting stronger, and you are horrified all the same. Your eyes are wide open as you can hear his thoughts clear as day, ringing through your head, painting a vivid portrait of what he’s imagining.

Doing you best to block out the images, your heart pounds. One second you see yourself beneath him with your arms around his shoulders and your legs wrapped around his waist as he rolls his hips into yours. The next, your hands are bound to the bed frame as he eats you out, a blindfold covering your eyes. Soon, another image of you riding him slowly, sensually, fills your mind, his praises following shortly after.

You can hear each and every thought he has during these moments, overcome with the need to make you his. To show the world that you belong to him, and only him. A shudder of disgust runs down your spine as you hear him think about how he’ll be able to feel your pleasure through touching you during these times, only increasing his own pleasure at the same time.

His thoughts demand to be heard, to be seen, and no matter how hard you try to block them out, you can’t.

You can tell he’s come after a few minutes, for the vivid images have finally stopped, and now he’s thinking about basking in your afterglow. Luckily, you’re able to block him out now, but the damage has been done.

His thoughts screamed his love for you, but what you felt was not love. It is obsession, a need to possess you and keep you all to himself. You need to keep away from him, before this situation becomes worse than it already is. And to think, all of this was just because you were nice to him and treated him like a regular person.

Finally, you manage to get some sleep, but your dreams are filled with nightmares of Jimin always chasing you and never being able to let you go. To say you don’t sleep well would be an understatement.

For the entire week, you manage to avoid him. Rushing off when you see him approaching you in the hallways, and ignoring his calls. Even the students have started whispering about it, wondering why anyone could ever ignore Park Jimin, the nicest guy in school. However, you know the truth, that beneath that facade is a dark monster lurking beneath the surface, waiting to strike.

To Jimin, that week feels like an eternity of agony. He doesn’t understand why you’re avoiding him, and it drives him crazy. Every time he sees you giving your attention to someone who is not him, someone undeserving of you, it causes his blood to boil. That should be him you’re giving all your attention to, not anyone else.

Your presentation is in a few days’ time, which worries you. You know you have to practice in order to get a good mark, and you’ll have to make sure you both have your facts down. At least after this, you can avoid him for good.

The whole time you practise the presentation with him in the library the night before the presentation, you expect him to confront you about what happened in his room the last time the two of you saw each other. As much as it pains him though, he’s decided to let you approach the subject first. He doesn’t want to push you away, nor make you run away from him again. If you go back to ignoring him after your presentation, he doesn’t know what he’s going to do.

Soon enough, your presentation comes and goes, and the two of you end up getting the best mark in the class, of which you could not be happier about. You notice Jimin still looking gloomy, and he scowls when he sees you hug Eric out of happiness. He’s getting tired of waiting for you to go to him. No matter, he has a plan in mind, and in order to set it in motion, he’ll need to make a few calls.

That evening, a knock on your door pulls you out of the notes you’re currently reviewing. Standing up, you stretch briefly before moving over to see who could be at your door at this time of night. Opening your door reveals Jimin standing there with his jaw clenched, clearly not happy.

“I need to talk to you,” he says, not even giving you a chance to respond before barging into your room.

“Jimin, what the hell, you can’t just barge into my room like this,” you say, crossing your arms in front of your chest as the door falls shut.

“Why have you been avoiding me?” He cuts straight to the point, turning around to face you, eyes dark as he meets your gaze.

“I haven’t been avoiding you,” comes your reply, but your voice is a little too tense for your statement to be true.

“Yes, you have,” he counters, mirroring your stance. “I was worried about you, so I did some digging. Normally I don’t like using my status to do these things but you left me no choice.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Your brow furrows.

“You’re a telepath,” he states, and you’re caught off guard.

“Excuse me?” 

“I looked into you, found out everything I could,” he says, taking a step towards you to close the distance between your bodies, only for you to take a step back yourself. “I know where you were born, where you grew up, everything about your family, even your power which you hide from everyone. But now? Now I understand why you’ve been avoiding me. Well, partially. While doing my research I happened to find out that you’ve been practicing mental blocks, so I looked into it. Turns out, if you experience high emotions, or if another person in close range experiences high emotions, it can penetrate that defence occasionally.”

“What are you implying here?” You frown, taking another step back as he takes another forwards.

“You know exactly what I’m getting at,” he smirks as your back hits the wall. “Obviously, despite your mental block, you’ve overheard some of my thoughts about you, though I don’t know why you don’t like them. I don’t like playing this card, but I’m a fairly desirable man with a powerful family, and I can give you everything you’ve ever wanted. I only want for you to become mine.”

“What makes you think I’ll agree,” you reply, eyes narrowed slightly at him. “I don’t care about any of that.”

“That’s exactly why I love you,” he hums, amused. “I knew you were going to say that, and I also knew you wouldn’t agree willingly. So, I made some more calls. Turns out I’m getting to that age where my parents think it’s best for me to get engaged, and who better to have as a daughter-in-law to my parents than a simple girl who came from a regular family. Humbles the Park family in the public eye while simultaneously keeping up appearances. Shows we’re not so narrow-minded about Powers. Besides, it’s the least they can do for me after the hell they’ve subjected me to.”

“I will never marry you, you’re delusional,” you say, leaning your head as far away from him as you can as he presses himself against you, successfully pinning you to the wall.

“See, that’s where you’re wrong, sweetheart,” his grin turns sinister. “Your parents have already agreed to the arrangement, and there’s going to be an announcement in the morning about our engagement. Who’s going to believe you, anyways? Everyone knows me as the kind son and heir of the Park family. You’re mine, whether you like it or not.”

“I can’t believe you,” you swallow the lump that’s in your throat.

“No, no, don’t be scared, baby,” he coos, bringing his hand up to stroke your cheek. “I would never hurt you, I love you too much.”

“You really expect me to love you after all of this? Forcing me into a marriage I don’t want?” You seethe, pushing him off of you and causing him to stumble back a few paces.

“You’ll warm up to it eventually,” he chuckles, “and in time, you’ll be consumed by my love just as I’ve been consumed by you. Now, let’s go to bed, we’ve got a big day tomorrow. After all, soon the whole world is going to know that you’re going to be my wife.”

[human-enthusiast]

Absurd Person #1 - Monkey D. Luffy (kid)

 Let’s start with not only the main protagonist of One Piece but also the first character to give Luffy any sort of injury...

...his dumb, seven-year-old self...

*Disclaimer: I don’t own this image - screenshot from Episode of East Blue

The last time I wrote this, I forgot to hit save and my browser just reloaded the page and lost everything. After that I just went “I’m done” and rage quit Tumblr for the night (which I normally don’t do). That’s how my Sundays usually go😒🥴

Now Onward!

Basic Classifications

Real World Ethnicity/Nationality: Brazilian

Class: farm / country / lower class

Culture (the one he grew up around): Dawn Island - Sea-side village

Fishing community

Farming / Ranching community

Hard work ethic

Small and close community members; relatively friendly; little to non-existent conflict

Selective mix of being open towards strangers (especially with merchant vessels for better trading opportunities) and weariness towards those they expect to be harmful (likes Pirates; I’d imagine the people of Windmill Village were understandably unnerved with the Red-Haired Pirates first showing up).

Core values (personal to Luffy): pride, physical strength, adventures on and outside his home village,

Relation to authority: neutral - shifting slightly towards negative (no clear basis of opinion; can only go off on Luffy’s fascination with pirates as the main viewpoint)

(The added information feels a little scatter-shot but figured I give it a try based on little information from the manga panels and how it lines up with real-world similarities. Most information is based on logical speculation and could change with new information in later chapters.)

I know that the Romance Dawn arc consists of the chapters up until he meets Coby and Alvida (I think...), but the depiction of Luffy’s character in the first chapter seems different from when he is seventeen and setting out to sea. So, I’ll treat kid Luffy as a separate character for the first analysis.

First Impressions and Introduction

Now, I am an anime watcher, first and foremost, so my first impression of this character stems from the Anime. My introduction towards this ball of chaos was when he popped out of a barrel, that he put himself into after realizing that a whirlpool suddenly appeared (how he missed it? - It’s Luffy), and then inexplicably took a nap in. That was the absurd reason I was able to stick with One Piece in the first few arcs (until Baratie became one of the major reasons I stuck with it - I’ll explain why when we get there).

And since the first chapter was used for episode four in the anime, I was already somewhat familiar with how the story started and who Luffy was as a kid. However, reading the first chapter felt....different than what I would’ve expected. And because the anime cut out a few details from the chapter, there definitely are some things to take from kid Luffy at that point.

So my first impression was, as follows:

The kid is unhinged...That explains some things...

Complete wild child of a backwater village from Day 1. 

LIKE-- The anime episode DID NOT explain how he got that scar and the guy didn’t bring it up ever. To be fair, that wasn’t a big focus because the anime didn’t make it a focus. Reading that part though did more for his character and a little of his upbringing, through speculation, making it a rather slow-building but also fascinating introduction into this series.

Just a bit of an add-on, but if the manga introduced Luffy in the same level of neutrality as what the Anime did, It may not have fully made it clear if Luffy was going to be the main protagonist. Then again, it’s a shounen manga, maybe it was rather obvious to everyone else. Regardless, his introduction served to 

(1) Make his entrance memorable

(2) Establish his character that could either compare or set him apart from his teen self.

(3) Act as a sort of precursor towards the introduction of Luffy’s world and upbringing (which isn’t completely established until the last few arcs of Pre-Time Skip)

Personality

The best way I could describe Luffy at this point is a stereotypical kid...

Energetic, short-tempered, adventure-seeking, easily impressed, and ignorant...

That last description is actually something I brought up in a separate post about the “Fluid themes” of One Piece. Because I found that a small but overarching part in many (almost all) themes and world issues that One Piece reflects has some level of unawareness or apathy. Jimbe put it best during the Fishman Island Flashback when they found Koala (paraphrasing)

“They are afraid of us because they don’t know us.”

Know us referring to acknowledging them as people on the same level as humans.

Because of that and plenty of other instances from the East Blue, it can be a potential center for many characters who go up against or wish to explore the world and find that they are a frog in a well.

And that’s what kid Luffy represents. A rather aggressive frog in a well that wants out.

Granted, he is a seven-year-old, whose schooling has a closer equivalent to the 16th and 17th centuries of our world, living in what appears to be a farming community, so I’d imagine his education only focuses on at least the basic levels of reading/writing, mathematics, etc. A small, unexciting farming village probably has more concerns over their melon crops rather than what the world has going on. Adding in Luffy, you get a kid who dreams about being a pirate and adventuring outside the isolated village, making him avidly interested in a world he has no experience with. Or in a world he thinks is all fun and games.

That’s pretty standard for any child that has a mild and peaceful life. No doubt Shanks and his crew would tell him stories about their adventures. Not as a sort of attempt to make him a pirate, but because he was easily entertained by it, building up this expectation with stereotypical pirate personas. And whether he has his “destructive” tendencies before they became a fixture in Windmill Village, they definitely seemed to amp it up enough for Luffy to try and prove he was “man enough” to be a pirate at seven years old.

Then when you add in this idealistic expectation with the selfishness of a young child, it creates an opportunity to learn. Because, as any kid may go through, will find that their fantasy of the world won’t be what they expected, and will often react negatively. Luffy’s expectation of Shanks is that he is the strongest man worthy enough to be a pirate.

Now, Luffy’s view of a “real man” stems a lot from this stereotype of men solving their problems through fighting only. Which also embodies this rather damaging philosophy of never running away or backing down from a fight (which I refer to as stupid bravery - something that comes up in a certain other character).

The amazing thing about all the combined aspects of this kid is the ability to create a learning lesson for Luffy. Which can become a motivational factor in his pursuit as a pirate.

His easily impressed nature makes it known both when the Red-Haired Pirates talk positively about piracy adventures and when Shanks leaves the village. The difference between the moments can be showcased by the difference in determination and will to make an effort to achieve his dream. As he declared he wants to be King of The Pirates, he sets himself to work at it, rather than try and go with others.

How He Shapes the Story / World Around Them

I don’t know if anybody else made a similar connection (I wanna say someone DID but I can’t remember where) but in combination with Luffy’s general enthusiasm growing up hearing wild stories, his narrative reminds me so much of Don Quixote De La Mancha.

It’s been a while since I last read that story-- and by read I mean translate some paragraphs from Spanish to English during my Spanish I class in freshman year of high school. Nonetheless, I thoroughly enjoyed the story. Part I entails an old man who, after indulging himself with various stories of knights and valor, decides he wants to partake in his own adventures. Under various delusions and misadventures, his story becomes a rather well-known one.

Don Quixote was called the first “modern book”. That was something my Spanish teacher mentioned regarding its acknowledgment by the world and always stuck with me. It was one of the first stories of the early medieval period to focus on a regular man. Other stories before this tended to be about legends, gods, demigods-- individuals who often were referred to as legends because they were born into high status (often above humans). Either through original texts (often for religious purposes) and then through varying interpretations (such as the Arthurian Legends), these tales were a part of the status quo.

Kid Luffy is a person that reflects so much of the Don Quixote story (And not just because his village has windmills-- the most iconic scene about the knight’s story). He is that simple, normal boy that longs for his own adventures when there seemingly is already a well-talked-about story about someone who achieved infamy. In place of that is a man named Gold Roger whose execution we see in the manga’s opening. At this point, we don’t have much understanding about how it impacts the world as of yet, we just know it is setting up for something significant to the story.

Luffy becomes that “regular” person from a small-town with big expectations for a grand adventure.

That perspective can slowly build into the story by starting in a simple setting with a character going through one of the first dynamic changes in his life. Luffy’s experience with Shanks’s sacrifice sets a course in his own adventure. A story that trails into a rather bonkers adventure at the end of chapter 1.

His development is what shaped his world. It’s the way he learns when as it stems from the consequences of his actions. Especially ones where the smaller ones turn out to be very costly, making it a hard lesson that ingrains into the young kid. His actions created by his old ideologies sparked an intense reaction in the people around him. Especially Shanks, who felt he was worth losing an arm towards.

How The WORLD Shapes HIM

So, for the sake of the fact that kid Luffy’s “World” in Chapter 1 mostly consists of Windmill Village, I’m adding in Shank’s and his crew’s influence to extend and further give credence to his influence. Because, as of this point, Shanks represents a glimpse into the life of a pirate that Luffy strives for.

With Luffy being in a quiet environment all seven years of life, there is growth through basic schooling and healthy child development (theoretically since Makino seems to be the most likely one acting as his guardian), instead of doing things outside that norm. Now Shanks is the odd factor that creates new development into Luffy’s dreams and future ambitions. 

The crew’s stories, charisma, and connection towards the kid actively (and probably unintentionally) created a positive expectation if he chose to pursue his dream. While that sounds inspiring, there were also negative aspects. Such as driving his ignorance and impatient nature to seek it out too early in his life.

Shanks then became a mediator. Luffy often has mixed feelings with Shanks as the man begets a level of encouragement while verbally making fun of Luffy for being a kid constantly. Despite that, it doesn’t completely deter Luffy’s ambitions. All it does is slowly drop his high expectations in Shanks after the first bar incident. This is again done by his childish outlook of physical strength and bravery equating to his ideal of a real man.

With Higama, Luffy learns about real-world dangers, and how bravery won’t always be enough to win battles. The same can be said for physical strength but at that moment it doesn’t apply to Luffy. 

Shanks’ and the crew’s involvement helped Luffy’s views change. His expectations are fulfilled, which in turn reveal that he was wrong about them.

Finally, seeing Shanks’ sacrifice unfold drove Luffy into a pang of newfound guilt. By then, he was able to change one part of his world views from a childish fantasy into the beginnings of a mature way of thinking. 

He gains some level of patience. Along with a set goal to work with. Attributes which are identifiable with Luffy in the chapters last few panels.

Patience = Luffy took time to train and learn to set sail at age seventeen.

Set goal = Be King of the Pirates

Add-Ons

When I say that kid Luffy, after Shanks’ sacrifice, gained a level of patience, it is meant as a deduction during that chapter. By no means am I insinuating that it became a permanent trait for his character. Because as of chapter 1, all of Luffy’s personality has yet to be revealed.

And this will apply to other posts for various characters. They may behave in ways during or in response to a particular event but it doesn’t necessarily equate to that becoming a whole personality trait. Calling Luffy patient, with having full acknowledgment of his personality during the bulk of One Piece, is completely off. But, there can and will be moments where Luffy will act patient when he deems it necessary.

This is a little hard to articulate but I hope it makes enough sense.

🏴‍☠️🐒

After-Notes

Here’s my first attempt at this analysis. It felt scattered even after editing everything. Breaking down characters sounds easy (and most times it is) but articulating and connecting things takes a lot of work.

Here's to hoping it gets easier with the next character. And maybe shorter paragraphs.

Up Next: Shanks (East Blue)

[hunting-winchester]

My thoughts on the finale

(Sorry, this ended up being soooo much longer than I intended, but it was also therapeutic for me to get it out, so if you read it all, sorry again, but thanks!)

I’ve been sitting on this for the past week trying to sort through my feelings about all of this. But the finale of Supernatural, while it did make me cry because my comfort show for the past 3 years (has it really only been 3 years since I started this side blog?) has ended, which was my distraction from the deaths of not only close family but also a friend whose death still affects me today. The newer seasons helped me more in the dealing with death, and I’ll explain that later, but I feel like the end of the show kind of took all of that and threw it out the window with a note that states “we don’t care.”

I’m not here to be mad at the actors. I know none of this is their fault. They did their best to make a great end to a show that was written for them. Their acting was spot on and made me feel for the characters that both them and I love so much. However, the ending took that love and put it through the grinder and I do put most (if not all) the blame on the network.

So I binged Supernatural in the summer of ‘17 within a month. I started it because I remembered my mom watching an episode when I was about 7 or 8 and I was so fascinated by it (episode Route 666 where Dean hangs up on Sam after the ghost truck disappears because Sam had a hunch that the truck couldn’t drive on hallowed ground. Dean didn’t like the idea that it was just a hunch, sticks in my mind). Within the first 5 episodes I was in love with the boys, and while I loved them both I became drawn to Dean over the next few seasons. Now I love them both, but like many others I started to see myself in him. Some anger issues with a heart so big that he would do anything to help his family. And a little bit of self depreciation that starts to escalate a bit more as the seasons go on.

Then I made it to Lazarus Rising. I met this absolute badass character who later becomes part of the family. He grows into the most kind hearted character that tries to do everything in the name of good, even when it tends to go a little off the rails. Then I saw a little bit of me in him as well. Good intentions, sometimes misguided, and only wants the best for the ones he loves.

I’ll focus more on the season I was here live for, not because the earlier seasons didn’t matter but because this is where things became really personal in my life. Supernatural 13 started on October 12, and on the 23rd I lost my friend. Everything started falling apart around me and nothing made sense. Nothing made sense about why them because it should be the terrible people that die terrible deaths, not good people. And while nothing seemed right in the world, I knew one thing for sure- that Supernatural will still be on just as scheduled and nothing could take that from me. So I made sure to still find time to watch that episode because I’ll be damned if I let this whole week go to hell. Let me find at least one good thing to happen. And while the scene didn’t fix the shitshow that became my life that week, a little bit of happiness raised in me when I saw Cas in the last scene of the episode.

So especially from that point on the show became of my little world away from reality. My reality sucked and, sure the Winchester’s lives weren’t all sunshine and rainbows, it was a nice distraction for an hour a week when I can watch the characters I care about continue to keep loving the ones they love.

The season continued then ended with a nice lead into season 14. I love Jensen and was ready to see how he would tackle the new role of Michael. So ready for the new season, in a new town 3 hours away from my hometown, (motivation being that I felt too close to everything that happened with my friend) and just ready to see where life would take me. Then I lost my Grandfather and my Aunt within a month of each other and absolutely no one would hire in the town I moved to. So another shitty summer and I end up moving back home within 3 months.

I continued watching Supernatural when it aired again in October; grateful for the hour weekly distraction again, and I kept up with it. I would log onto here after the episode, reblog things and read people’s reactions. I enjoy this community so much. Then the episode came in ‘19 where Dean was in the infirmary after having his head bashed against the wall a couple times and Jack was worried about whether he’d get through it. And the speech Cas gave is something that has stuck with me ever since then, because since the death of my friend it had been the same thing I had been telling myself.

Jack: What’s the point- if everyone I care about is just gonna leave?

Cas: The point is that they were here at all and you got to know them. When they’re gone, it will hurt, but that hurt will remind you of how much you loved them.

This felt absolutely validating to me. I was tired of hurting. I was done with and angry at everything and felt as if I just wanted it to be gone, but I kept telling myself that it only hurts because I loved them so much. When I heard that line, watching my favorite character recite it to Jack, it felt as if he was talking to me because it was something that I needed to hear at that point in my life. It felt as if they knew I needed saving and reached through the screen to pull me up and say what you’re feeling is valid and there are people out there who are feeling like you are now, and all of you will end up okay.

So I took this to heart and lived the best I could everyday. I turned that into my mantra and started living the life I knew they would want me to; with kindness and love and understanding.

I owe a lot to these characters. I owe my ability to go forth with kindness and understanding to Cas for making me feel valid. I owe my ability to move past my anger and finding my identity to Dean. I owe a lot to Misha and Jensen to bringing these characters to the point that I can feel all of this. To get to the point that I may be a little healthier than I was 3 years ago. 

And then season 15. The final season. The season where I say goodbye.

It started out as a nice tribute I believe. They had brought back some old characters that we had missed (lordy I missed Kevin and Adam). They did some things that we had talked about a lot on this platform that we would love to see before the series ended. It seemed like it would be a good ending to a show we all love. We saw what our boys went through all these years and they were evident in the beginning of the season and was slowly being pulled through the season. We saw how they differed from the early season and got to see them with their new-found family. Do I wish more of the episode included more of TFW 2.0? Of course, but I’m still happy we got as much as we did... up until the end.

Episode 18. We knew it was coming before it happened. There was so much speculation about this after the convention where Misha and Jensen had both talked about the emotional scene that Richard Speight Jr. directed. How it was a hard day on set and that absolutely no one was cracking jokes during this time which was a really big indication about how important this scene would be. We knew what would happen, but we didn’t know what all would happen.

We got Cas’ confession, and as much as some are like “you can interpret that as you like,” we knew what was meant here. We knew where Cas was coming from and to see his happiness to save the one that he loves was something I will never forget from when I first watched it.

And after all this hype for this after the fact, not just from fans but also the actors, we knew there had to be more to this. This was a monumental moment! There had to be more! But we know where this is going.

Episode 19. Not much to report. Which as Jensen had put it, episode 19 was the season finale and episode 20 would be the series finale. Episode 19 ended like I thought it would generally. Chuck is finished. Jack is the new God (which some of us guess would happen at the beginning of the season. I feel amazed we got something right after the fiasco that is episode 20). I still don’t understand the montage at the end of 19. That’s what I would have expected at the end of 20. If only we knew that was the first of SO. MANY. DAMN. POINTLESS. MONTAGES. But I’ll move on for now.

Episode 20. If you would have asked me 13 years ago how this show would end, I feel as if this episode would be pretty damn close to my answer. That’s not good writing. “Oh Dean dies and Sam gets to live and have an ‘apple pie’ life. Makes total sense!” And that would make sense if nothing in the last 13 years happened. There has been so much growth in not only the last 13 years but also just within the last season, and it’s just all gone. Dean dies, not because he wanted to, but because of another hunt that his dad didn’t even finish. Something that could have been done in season 1. He dies, not ready, not having the chance to finally experience freedom from his “destiny” (something that this show has made them fight against since the introduction of the angels might I add!), not giving an ounce of effort to stay alive, and not ever really finding peace. I’m sorry but there was absolutely no way that Dean could find the shred of peace he deserved within 2 weeks of escaping Chuck’s grasp. But this is where I started having issues in the episode.

Dean, a character I love and saw myself in for years, dies before he finds peace and in all honesty, true happiness. A character that has been known for suicidal actions and thoughts (episode 13x05 ring a loud bell?) and you decide to say he needs to die before it gets better? Or were you saying that it only gets better or peaceful for people like him after he dies? Because either way that sends a really shitty message. I don’t think I have found my peace. I think I’m better than I was a couple years ago, much like Dean, but I sure as Hell haven’t found my peace. So are you telling me that death is the only way I find it? Because I’m sure I’m not the only one reading it like this.

Dean gets a small hunter’s funeral (if you want to even call it that). No one they befriended or became family with along the way is there (sure, blame Covid. I’m sure it was part of it, but Hell. Surely something could have been done to bring at least a couple more people in for this). Then we get Dean’s heaven where Cas is mentioned in a throw away comment that you would miss if you weren’t intently paying attention (he’s out of the empty and helped with Dean’s heaven. Awesome. Show him then). We literally only see one person in Dean’s heaven. Bobby. Which he is great, but what about the “everyone we lost on the way” that was seriously just mentioned the episode before? They not there?

And from here, we get even more montages. Why the Hell, do we need to fast forward through Sam’s life, with shots of Dean driving around heaven? Why not explore more into Sam’s family (not just the wife and kids but also check up on Donna? Jody? Sweet goodness any indication of what the Hell happened to Eileen!?) Why not show Dean seeing his loved ones in his heaven? WHY NOT SHOW DEAN SEEING CAS AFTER WHAT HAPPENED IN 18? So much could have been done following up what happened in 18 and it was chosen to be ignored! Which is awful in so many damn ways, but it doesn’t matter for this because it was completely ignored. And after that 10 min montage (which montages should not last that long. I don’t care what anyone says. If a montage lasts that long, they could have made important scenes pertaining to that) Sam dies old and is greeted by Dean in Heaven and we look off into the sunset because finally we’re all happy... and dead.

All of this, and it feels like the message through this whole thing is “yall can fight for happiness, but yall won’t get it until you’re 6 feet down in a grave!” No peace. No found family. No fighting the good fight. Just death is the end, and that’s all that matters... and that’s where it all stings. I watched the characters I see myself in for years, got validation from them and felt as if things for them could get better after all of this, maybe they could for me too. Only things didn’t get better for them. It ended in death and only “happiness” after the fact. This isn’t a message I expected from this show, but it sure as Hell is the message I received.

So thanks C*W. Way to make all of this “keep fighting” mean absolute shit. You did a bang up job murdering a show you housed for years.

[yurimother]

Top Yuri Anime Poll Results

Whether it is subtext or explicit, cute or sexy, school love or gay action thrillers I love yuri anime. These series either focus on or contain elements of female same-sex relationships. Pride month is the perfect time to look back and reflect on the best of this genre. I teamed up with OG Man of The Yuri Nation (yurination[dot] wordpress[dot] com/) and together we put out a poll asking what you thought the top yuri anime series were and over 1000 of you responded submitting almost 5000 different entries. We spent hours combing through the data, analyzing and commenting on the results and we would like to share our thoughts with all of you. Enjoy the reflections of me the yuri critic and OG the dedicated yuri fan!

These are the Top 20 Yuri Anime as voted by you

1. Bloom Into You - 692 Votes

OG: Be it East or West the YagaKimi took the world by storm. Citrus and BiY once again taking the top two spots remains unsurprising.There is something undeniably fascinating about our leading ladies consisting of an asexual slowly coming to love her senpai back but restraining herself for various reasons. The biggest one being said senpai having a deep case of self-loathing and a fear of romantic reciprocation, also for various reasons. She is like “I love you but please do not love me back”. Then there is one of the most popular “cursed” lesbians of all time in Sayaka, the fantastic adult side-couple (The world needs an anime starring lesbian adults/mothers) and the various other characters who have their own interesting tales to tell. The series absolutely deserves a spot in the Top 10 though it would not be in my personal Top 3. Oh and as Yurimother said the presentation was fantastic.Visually stunning from start to finish in my opinion. Special mention goes to the criminally underused first-person “camera”. So cool.

YuriMother: I agree with this series deserving a spot in the top ten even if not the number one slot. For me, it was good but not great. Moments such as the aforementioned adult couple as well as stellar art and a phenomenal score made this series enjoyable but they were not enough to overshine the problems of the narrative. For the love of the Yuri Goddess, this series is crying out for asexual representation but insists on carrying on with its confused romance. Enough complaining though, many people love Bloom Into You despite its faults and I agree. The characters are interesting and lovable and it manages to tell a yuri story more real and complex than the typical fluffy girl meets girl narratives.

2. Citrus - 452 Votes

YuriMother: The presence of Citrus and Bloom Into You prove two things to me, the importance of recency, as both anime aired only last year, and the sheer popularity of these series. Both had established and extremely successful manga runs which were adapted into English by the publishing masters of yuri, Seven Seas. Citrus is a contentious series, to say the least, as it includes elements of (non-blood related) incest and non-consensual actions as part of Mei and Yuzu’s “relationship.” However, if you possess the magical power to turn off the part of your brain screaming at you that those aspects are deeply problematic or if you seek a different interpretation then Citrus can be downright WONDERFUL. I actually loved this anime series for its characters, amazing animation, and salaciousness. As OG said, it is an operatic concussion of emotion (seriously everyone in the series needs therapy) but my is it fun to watch. The Citrus anime also holds a special place in my heart, as the first serious piece I ever wrote was a review for it over on Okazu (nice plug)! Citrus is certainly not for everyone but those that stuck with it and overlooked some of the problems ended up loving it.

OG: Here we are again with Citrus at #2. My thoughts on the series remains the same as in the previous two lists I discussed (the Akiba Research and goo Ranking Japan lists), overrated. Good soap opera/telenovela-esque series but my feelings on the cast are mixed (which I imagine was the writer’s intent). My main issue has always been the obstacles repeatedly challenging Yuzu and Mei’s feelings for each other instead of it focusing on “Hey. We like each other but our parents got married. What do we do? Can we keep our desires for each other in check?”. Instead it is one newcomer after another who want to eat either Yuzu or Mei and Yuzu repeatedly asking herself if she really wants robo-stepsister patties? I will give the anime adaptation credit. The story was easier to enjoy animated than drawn. It also helped that I grew up in a telenovela loving family. The characters’ actions, reactions and emotions were depicted better in the anime. I still consider the show’s greatest accomplishment being the humanization of Mei-Tron. In the manga it took a post-epilogue continuation to show readers “Hey everyone. Mei-Tron was human all along.” whereas in the anime I sensed the small bit of humanity quicker than in the manga where I continued seeing her as a block of wood with a brain up to the point where I dropped it. Harumin though is the greatest regardless of anime or manga adaptation. Bless her. Regardless of how I feel about the series I get its massive popularity. After all, were the rest of the story to get an animated continuation I would gladly pick it up...Not the manga though.

3. Sakura Trick - 342 Votes

OG: There are fans who understandably would disagree with Sakura Trick’s praise but I will always defend it and the anime as one of the very best in the genre. First off it aired at a time where animated on-screen close up kisses (specifically consensual ones) between ladies were rare. Haruka X Yuu’s relationship was believable for the most part. Even their season finale resolution, them not getting what being “in love” meant at the time, made sense though I get why it left some scratching their heads. Probably not the best “manga lure/bait” end I suppose. On the bright side Kotone X Shizuku’s story definitely did not have the two doubting their true feelings for each other. I do hope Kaede X Yuzu eventually hooked up in the manga as they too had potential to be a lovely couple.

YuriMother: Sakura Trick has no real narrative, no great insight, and offers little intellectually. As a teacher, it makes me furious, as a fan of yuri, elated. The anime is beloved for its plentiful soft service, presenting a plethora of kisses, cuddles, and awkward thigh shots (ew). However, it was one of the first anime to include this much explicit yuri service without being pornographic. All the characters were cute and fun, even if there was little in the way of development or complexity, it worked for the series. If you want something to make you think or to learn about yuri, pass over this one. But, if you want a cute and meaningless anime definitely watch it.

4. Yuru Yuri - 337 Votes

YuriMother: OG may not be a fan of Yuru Yuri but I certainly am, which is fairly obvious to anyone who observes that a solid 20% of my communications occur in the form of gifs from this series. It is hilarious, cute, and playful. Just like Sakura Trick, this anime is an easy watch with ultimately little substance. However, the part of me that is not rolling of the floor laughing every time I watch Yuru Yuri lives in a state of pained existence with the knowledge that this work of all things ended up being so popular when people are telling interesting stories about queer women and people in actual relationship that manage to still be funny and adorable while having something to say.

OG: The undisputed most mainstream friendly yuri series there is. It is also one of the funniest. My one gripe is that excluding a select few the main draw of the show besides the comedy and yuri is the ship wars, meaning (almost any girl can be shipped with each other). Not a fan of that but hey, it brought Namori the big bucks so who am I to judge? In any case not much else to add. It deserves all the adulation it gets but the free for all shipping irks me. Reminds me of how they botched Chika X Riko in the Love Live! Sunshine!! Anime. If you were going down the Riko X Yohane route from the start then why give us Chika X Riko in the first half? Ship wars yo. Tch. Hopefully I properly explained myself..

5. Kase-san and Morning Glories (Asagao to Kase-san) - 289 Votes

OG: Still wish this got a 12-13 episode anime. The glorious movie showed how much it deserves one. Whether it will happen or not remains to be seen. In any case the beauty of Kase-san X Yamada is how simple their romance is. No strings attached whatsoever. It is as straightforward as a self-proclaimed “ordinary” cutie, Yamada, having a crush on the super cool school beauty Kase-san. Said beauty is revealed to be just as “adorkable” as Yamada. The other highlight is their story not ending once they officially started dating (as is the case with many romance stories) but that being only the beginning, like real life. From then on, side-stories aside, the two biggest challenges for the two is Yamada accepting that it is okay for someone as “ordinary” as her to be the “cool babe”s girlfriend and Kase-san finding different ways to express her love/hunger for the cutie. As for the OVA, cramming the second part of the first series in an hour definitely had the downside of excluding some important moments, yes, but it at least covered some of the best moments in the manga. The first half of the story was summarized in a five-minute music video. One last thing. The animation, though a bit too brought for some, was glorious. It also had some long pauses which were effective (The bus stop scene being the most infamous) but while I did not mind them at all even I will admit some pauses went a bit too long. A small nitpick all things considered. Fingers crossed one day we either get that 12-13 episode anime for the first series, the sequel or both. That is one of my dreams.

YuriMother: At last, an anime that I do not have to react cynically to! Kase-san is one of the single greatest works of yuri animation to ever to be created and its glory is rivaled only by the manga from which it originated. Despite being only a one hour long OVA this adaption told such an engaging and realistic (finally) story of romance and personal growth. We get to skip the meatless girl meets girls arcs and get into the depth and complexity as Yamada and Kase work to further their relationship. They struggle with the fact that they are two different people who want different things out of life and love and have to actually work on their partnership. Kase-san also includes signs of physical affection and love that are never lewd, immature, or gross, I do not even think I could refer to them as “service”. However, for me, Kase-san’s greatest victory (both the anime and manga) is in its escape from school romance, which in this genre is often a shelter from reality, allowing for women to be in relationships without actually being queer. Kase and Yamada instead make an effort to continue their romance and build a life that includes their relationship once they graduate in a triumphant final act. This anime is a slap in the face to the class S stories and sloppily sexualized works which proliferate the yuri genre. Asagao to Kase-san shines as a holy beacon for the greatness that this genre can achieve.

6. Puella Magi Madoka Magica - 286 Votes

YuriMother: Hurray!! For two entries in a row, I get to talk about series that I wholeheartedly adore without having to constantly attach caveats. Puella Magi Madoka Magica is not considered by all to be yuri, and that is certainly not what it is best known for. PMMM is however famous for twisting the tropes of the magical girl genre and creating one of the most cohesive and thoughtful narratives ever put to screen. This series summoned a new era for the magical girl genre (what OG humorously referred to as the “Moepocalypse”) but no other title managed to top Madoka Magica’s runaway success. Every aspect of this work is highly polished including character designs, a phenomenal soundtrack, and superb writing. This is not only the definitive work of its genre but of all postmodern anime. Whether or not one is a fan of yuri every anime fan should give Madoka Magica a watch.

OG: Meduka Meguca. Its impact in the “Moepocalypse” (Shows where cute and sexy girls consistently suffering physically and emotionally. These are usually dark magical girl shows.) genre and legacy are undeniable. It deserves all the praise it gets. It scarred many unfortunate souls, Homura is a legend in yuridom, Kyouko X Sayaka are glorious (Especially in Rebellion), Meduka’s Mom Junko is a Top Tier Sexy Mama, Charlotte the Witch is a very strange girlfriend and of course Hitomi is a walking anti-fun meme. The animation, especially the creepy doodle like monsters known as Witches are memorable. However, it is not my favorite Moepocalypse show. That honor goes to Yuki Yuna is a Hero.

7. Strawberry Panic - 224 Votes

OG: Like it or not Strawberry Panic is a yuri classic. I have a strong feeling that like many readers around my age (31 during this writing) this was their first 100% yuri anime. The cheese is real but it is the yummy kind of cheese and I loved almost every minute of it, except Amane X Hikari. That was the weakest of the love stories going on. Poor Yaya trying too hard (Not saying this in condescending way. She literally tried too hard). It is like a young adult lesbian novel but more fun. I mean Nagisa X Shizuma might as well be “Lesbian Twilight but not crappy”. Let us be honest, Shizuma is a vampire. Chikaru is an undisputed goddess and Kagome is the cutest.

Oh and I will repeat this statement till my last breath…

#TamaoWasRobbed.

YuriMother: I may be almost a decade younger than OG but even for me Strawberry Panic was my first yuri and it more than earns its nickname as the “gateway yuri,” although last year’s Citrus and Bloom Into You may be presenting serious contenders for this title. If for no other reason than nostalgia, Strawberry Panic remains my favorite yuri works but this ridiculous soap-opera of an anime does deserve a fair amount of recognition. I see Strawberry Panic as the culmination of the S subgenre revived by Maria Watches Over Us. However, this work succeeds at both parodying many of the tropes of S and yuri while breaking a few. However, its greatest accomplishment is introducing many of the young western fans of yuri to the genre. Strawberry Panic, you are an overly dramatic mess but thank you for all you have done.

8. Revolutionary Girl Utena - 176 Votes

YuriMother: Another gem of the yuri genre, actually scratch that, if works like Kase-san are gems then Utena is the minerals from which gems form. I think that is how it works, I am not a geologist. My poor analogies and subtle nods to Steven Universe aside, Revolutionary Girl Utena is one of the single most important works of yuri anime, possibly even more so than Sailor Moon. These two works were the dawn of the current age of yuri, an era spurn on by social progress and the internet into a place where more yuri works featuring honest depictions of homosexuality are flourishing. Utena laid the groundwork for queer representation in anime and for that I remain forever grateful to this masterpiece.

OG: I must confess. While I saw the movie long ago and thought it was cool I have yet to sit down and finish watching the main series. I cannot say much about this show other than it is another yuri classic. Possibly one of the biggest. I think I will leave this to Her Holiness because even if I had seen it I do not consider myself someone who possesses the sufficient intellect to properly explain why this is a legendary show.

9. Flip Flappers - 132 Votes

OG: I would need an essay to explain why this show is legendary. Let me see. It is a story of a girl who discovered her gayness thanks to her growing attraction to a lovable idiot/genki. There are references to Western media, dimension hopping (including Class S Hell), self-discovery, a sexual orientation journey, a tree, armored wedding gowns, crazy third wheels, Ku Klux Klan stand-ins…You know what? Just watch Flip Flappers. It is a hot mess of random, crazy, creative and thought provoking awesomeness with a wonderful dose of gayness. Glory be to PapiCoco. However, as Her Holiness mentioned this is essentially Ikuhara-san levels of weirdness (though not as complicated I feel) but as the plot thickens it all (sort of) starts making sense...eventually. That tree yo.

YuriMother: Flip Flappers was almost too strange and abstract even for me, and that is saying something. However, upon further examination, one of the most interesting works of yuri is revealed. This heavily stylized anime delves deep into the sexual maturation of its protagonist while examining the yuri genre and representation in media. Flip Flappers is the perfect marriage of heavy visual style and intellectual substance. Definitely give them one a.. err better make that three watches, as you will want to be sure to get everything out of this beautiful series as possible.

10. Miss Kobayashi’s Dragon Maid - 131 Votes

YuriMother: This series is the closest anime fans have to a lesbian couple having a family that we have, and that is a shame. I LOVE family narratives, outside of the yuri genre Usagi Drop is my favorite anime. To me, seeing women balance life, a relationship, and children is some of the best queer representation there is. However, for every point in Kobayashi’s favor, there is also a glaring fault. Kobayashi is a modern woman in the workforce providing for herself and her “family,” but is borderline abusive to Tohru. Kanna is an inquisitive child being raising by two women, but there are weirdly sexual scenes featuring her. As previously mentioned on this list, if one can silence the reasonable part of the brain this work becomes enjoyable, hilarious, and adorable. Unfortunately, its faults prevent it from being more than an amusement and I seriously doubt that they will fade in the second season. But hey, it sells a ton of figures so… YAY!

OG: This series is one of the closest yuri fans have to a series starring a lesbian couple with a daughter and it is wonderful. Is the tale of an eternally grateful dragon who wanted to repay the human who saved her life, albeit drunk, by becoming her live-in maid. Tohru being a dragon girl had incredible power and could easily crush everyone in sight but preferred to try and understand humanity so she could live in peace with the woman she loved. It of course was hard at times but thanks to Miss Kobayashi slowly growing to accept her back (romantically she had a ways to go) and the two raising the adorable bundle of mighty puff known as Kanna they became a happy family. How long this relationship will last and whether Miss Kobayashi would come to fully love Tohru back romantically remains to be seen. I have high hopes it can and will happen. Kanna X Riko is precious (Yes. Even that scene). We even have a potential BL couple, which is nice. Not a fan of Lucoa X Shouta the shota. Not because of the age gap but it not being my kind of romantic comedy. It is the same reason I have a hard time buying Tsubame X Misha from UzaMaid. Mya-Nee X Hana from Wataten...maybe. At least Mya-Nee showed she is patient. Back to Dragon Maid. Great series. Naughty of course but great.

11. Sweet Blue Flowers (Aoi Hana) - 119 Votes

OG: Megane girl falls for a cutie but has a hard time confessing to her to the point she gives a relationship with another girl a try. Said other girl has troubles of her own courtesy of her own views on what love. Do not get me started on the OTHER girl who likes megane’s girlfriend. I did not even mention megane girl’s first love interest who she herself eventually begins questioning her feelings for the glasses wearing maiden. While this is well known throughout the history of yuri anime Aoi Hana made it clearer than ever that Yuri + Classical Music go hand in hand. Plus the show is quite pretty. Ultimately enjoyment of this series depends heavily on viewers’ patience.

YuriMother: Aoi Hana was ahead of its time in many regards. Most yuri during the early twenty-first century was unrealistic and melodramatic, especially with the revival of S stories. Aoi Hana instead presents a calm and realistic story that we still rarely see in yuri anime today. Instead of relying on tricks like service or comedy Aoi Hana presents a serene and character-driven story which is matched by equally calming scenery. It is certainly not the most thrilling watch, but a slow and beautiful slice of real life that remains one of the all-time strongest yuri works.

12. Yurikuma Arashi - 99 Votes

YuriMother: Yurikuma Arashi is strange, to say the least, but this is not out of the ordinary for legendary director Ikuhara, who also directed Utena. Parallels are easily drawn between this work and Flip Flappers, as they are both complex and encoded with enough symbolism to drown a bear. Yurikuma is one of my favorite works in the yuri genre and I have had more than a few heated discussions about interpretations of the work, including one memorable occasion when I was visiting a college professor and we ended up in a shouting match in the middle of the hall. However, while Flip Flappers holds a high degree of polish the same can, unfortunately, not be said here. Yurikuma Arashi has more than a few scenes of fanservice many of which overly fetishize the characters and relationship and some of the symbols, particularly lily flowers and the word “yuri” are practically beaten to death with an object I refuse to come up with because I am starting to have my fill of symbolism. However, despite some of its sloppiness, Yurikuma is one of the single most interesting and well-formed anime out there and analyzing it is practically a right of passage for seasoned yuri fans.

OG: Yurikuma Arashi is my favorite of Ikuhara-san’s series. To me it was the least complicated of his works but even so I needed help to understand the show. Luckily I had plenty of assistance. The meat of the story is more complicated but put simply it is about a war between a group of bear girls (and some human girls) who want to freely express their love and/or desire/hunger for each other and another group that amounts to Right to Censor from WWF. Like I said it is far more complex than that but that is the gist. The anime is quite ecchi and it has good reason for it. Again the gay bears are the more liberated of the groups and them getting more sexy scenes is meant to showcase that. Our heroine has good reason to be grumpy and a divine entity was introduced alongside a certain someone from a certain dark anime we already discussed.

In the end it is a show starring lesbian bear girls. I love love stories between women and i love bears. It was obvious I would end up enjoying this one. Like other complex stories it is not for everyone. Shows like Flip Flappers, Utena and Yurikuma have something of a learning people will have to get accustomed to in order to enjoy them.

13. Whispered Words (Sasameki Koto) - 88 Votes

OG: To me Aoi Hana and Sasameki Koto were always connected despite the former being a drama and the latter a comedy. Both star a female protagonist struggling with how to best tell the girl she likes her true feelings whereas their love interest for one reason or another makes it all the more challenging to get their feelings across. Both shows aired during a time yuri was not as popular of a genre as it would become over time. Perhaps if they had come out a little later when yuri was becoming more popular in the mainstream they would have fared better…Then again they may have helped set the groundwork for future yuri shows so it’s just as well they came out when they did. In any case both good shows worthy of “best of yuri” lists. SK has the dynamic of the megane in love and her somewhat airheaded love interest who specifically likes “cute girls”. Poor megane has a hard time figuring out what the airhead defines as “cute”. The show also features an amusing side-couple of an ojou-sama and her tsundere girlfriend. Not to mention the somewhat controversial side-girl who plays a more prominent role in the 2nd half of the anime. Heck, even Mr Crossdresser himself is cool. Let us not forget Miss “Ha Ha Ha!” Another really good show that I would love to see the rest of the manga get animated someday but considering most anime are essentially manga commercials and the SK manga ended the odds of a 2nd season are close to 0.

YuriMother: 2009 was a great year for yuri anime, with both Sasameki Koto and Aoi Hana, among other works, airing. But while Aoi Hana sought to resist many of the common tropes of the genre and tell a simple grounded story Sasameki Koto appears to have looked a the list of every convention possible and say “yeah I can do that.” It has melodrama, comedy, one-sided love, friend love stories, I worship this genre but even I think there is a limit. However, Sasameki Koto is one of the most competent yuri anime works of the current era. While all the tropes are present most of the problematic aspects of the genre are not. The story is well written, characters enjoyable, and art that is really well done for the time. I enjoy every watch and if I ever want to quickly download the genre’s tropes into another person's head I need only duct tape them to a chair and throw on Sasameki Koto.

14. Riddle Story of Devil (Akuma no Riddle) - 77 Votes

YuriMother: Akuma no Riddle was highly anticipated back in 2014, sporting a premise of student assassins that, while certainly not unique, was outside the norms for the yuri genre. It promised a dark and thrilling take on the yuri genre that would not become popular until the yuri horror trend a few years later. At first, it looked like this would be successful with an excellent setup and some pretty compelling characters but ultimately Akuma no Riddle fell flat and became more derailed as it continued. The monster of the week style of episodes left little room for complex plots and plans or proper character development, which is a shame because of how engaging so many of the assassins were upon original presentation. However, this show still has some of the best action in the yuri genre, placing it alongside series like Cannan and Utena despite its flawed storytelling. If nothing else, the anime may compel one to read the manga, which expands the story and characters more than the show was given time to.

OG: Professional assassins secretly gathered at an academy in an attempt to take the life of a seemingly innocent cutie to win the ultimate prize, one of whom wishes to protect the adorable redhead. Yes the manga, which is pretty much a Director’s Cut, is better and the anime would have benefited from having 20+ episodes instead of 12 and a delightful beach OVA but the show did a good job of showing viewers what each assassin was like, their motivations (though many of their origin stories were summarized in written biographies during commercial breaks viewers needed to pause to read) were clear enough and the duels, as brief as some of them were, had enough spicy goodness in them to be memorable, especially the ones in the latter half of the show. Oh, and although the manga wrapped up after the anime it had a very similar ending.

15. Revue Starlight - 72 Votes

OG: Gay theater girls who strive to become the top star, meaning the best actress or lead actor of the cast. How do they do it? By working hard and overcoming their personal hardships? Yes. That. What makes this show so wonderful despite being almost a year old as of this writing is not only do the ladies all have interesting stories to tell but so does the stage. Every song, prop, movement, dance, gesture etc. It is like the performers and performances are united. It is like in Spongebob where not only does the person in the boots tell a story but the boots as well.

Oh yes. I almost forgot to mention the mysterious underground theater and talking giraffe. Never forget the talking giraffe from Hell. #Wakarimasu.

Super cool and super gay.

YuriMother: Bushiroad continuously gets better at what they do, creating media franchises of cute girls filled with music and making mountains of cash from smartphone games. Inspired by the likes of Love Live, they created BanG Dream and last year Revue Starlight. However, where these franchises fell short Revue Starlight success. It never twists its characters to tell a story but rather creates compelling arcs around them. I thoroughly enjoyed and agree with its place on this list.

16. Konohana Kitan - 68 Votes

YuriMother: I know of Konohana Kitan for its constant presence at yuri events more so than the anime or even the manga. It is adorable, relaxing, simple, and fun. While it does not add anything super substantial to the genre it does not take anything either or present any objectionable material. The “plot” is nonexistent but that does not matter, as it is not trying to tell a story or make commentary, just be fluffy and simple.

OG: Konohana Kitan to me is a Girls Club (Cute girls doing cute things) and iyashikei hybrid anime. It is visually stunning as it is relaxing with Yuzu pretty much one of the cutest demigoddesses in existence. She of course is a chick magnet but her heart will forever belong to Satsuki.

17. Destiny of the Shrine Maiden (Kannazuki no Miko) - 65 Votes

OG: The other stuff on the show is still not that great but ChiMeko will forever stand the test of time as far as I’m concerned. Top 10 for their love story alone. Yes. I know THAT ONE SCENE continues being controversial and talked about every time curious new yuri fans witness greatness…but I will forever defend Chikane because I get where she was coming from. Would I have done something different? Yes. The thing is you need to put yourself in her shoes and understand what she wanted to accomplish and how far she would go to get it done. Kotoha is best side-character and Souma Ogami is real man’s man who does not deserve the hate. He was an honorable warrior to the end. He fought well and accepted defeat like a man. Plus his yell is inspirational.

YuriMother: My feelings on Kannazuki no Miko are incredibly mixed. It has many of the worst facets of early current era yuri anime, tropes include S, rape and… am I reading this correctly, demon mechs? Worst of all it presents a cycle, a never-ending loop that haunts the characters in the overarching plot and it does not resolve it. If a work ever presents such an element, like Puella Magi did, it must be overcome or confronted at least. Its presence makes the already cringy story feels cheap and lazy. However, I love the two female leads and their difficult relationship. I love the music, especially the hauntingly beautiful ending theme, and the final moments of episode 11 are some of the greatest seconds I have ever seen in an anime. I cannot wrap my mind around my view of this series but at the end of the day, I understand it. I do not believe that work like it would ever be warmly accepted today but for its time it does stand as a breakout piece of yuri anime.

18. Princess Principal - 61 Votes

YuriMother: Princess Principal is one of the best anime of the past few years. It had everything, an interesting premise, great characters, an incredible soundtrack. Alongside all this is the sharp writing and thrilling story. Princess Principal did everything Akuma no Riddle wanted to with an intriguing and action-packed story featuring strong characters. On top of all this, the animation is top notch. A six-part movie sequel is planned which has me somewhat concerned, but I am glad to see that it is being continued as the ending to the series was one of its weakest aspects. Now if you will excuse me, I need to listen to some jazz.

OG: Cute and sexy gay spies in a dramatic British Steampunk setting. What more do readers need? Allow Her Holiness to elaborate a bit further. Currently waiting for the multi-part cinematic continuation.

19. Izetta: The Last Witch - 60 Votes

OG: I am known for loving shows people do not think as highly of. Izetta: The Last Witch is no different. I love this show so much. Besides how certain events transpired some complained about the depiction of WW2. Basically think about people ranting about storylines and content featured in certain Call of Duty and Battlefield games. Here however, it is clearly a fictional great war inspired by WW2. I was invested in the following:

-The cute and sexy ladies.

-Seeing two badass lesbians lead an army against an evil empire.

-FiZetta’s romance. This of course being the major highlight. I love FiZetta so much. My sexy lesbian babies and Anne X Grea’s mentors. They taught them everything they know after all.

It is similar to how I felt watching Kannazuki no Miko where my focus was primarily on the leading ladies’ developing romance. The difference is that unlike Kannazuki I was also somewhat entertained by our heroines’ enemies along with their allies. Basically viewers’ enjoyment of the show depends on how seriously they take their history and are willing to overlook the liberties this story takes with its depictions of the weapons, military and the familiar evil empire. FiZetta are one of my favorite lesbian couples of all time.

By the way, in that famous scene, yes they did. Viewers just have to squint their eyes to see “it”.

YuriMother: Another show that I consider to have squandered its potential. I know that lots of people enjoyed this one, including OG but I could not bring myself to finish this constantly mediocre series. Perhaps I am tired of alternative light-fantasy European-war inspired plots. Trying to stand out in this bloated genre is difficult and Izetta fails. Izetta started strong and hooked many viewers with its amazing visual and auditory polish but this was quickly lost in the plot which, while set up well, struggle to gain any ground of pay off what had been established. On the yuri side, it did not really do anything interesting or satisfying, with plenty of scenes feature the character’s standing next to each other looking cute and one or two moments of actual yuri. I am glad that some of you were able to enjoy this one more than me at least.

20. Maria Watches Over Us (Maria-sama ga Miteru) - 57 Votes

OG: Like Strawberry Panic this is a “Like it or not” classic. Despite being a Class S show it did its own thing and became a pioneer for . It’s also responsible for the many yuri jokes related to all-girl schools in anime.Shimako X Noriko best Grande and Petite Souer! Yumiko X Sachiko were great too as the two grew to better understand each other. Most memorable scene for me was the panda costume. Even Sei is a sleeper icon in all yuridom. Yoshino X Rei had a very interesting dynamic. I actually think they are the real pioneers of relationships between cousins. Thank you YoshiRei. HaruKana, Kaede X Sara and several others owe you two much appreciation.

YuriMother: Another great and significant series, Maria Watches Over Us, took the tropes of early yuri works, Catholic schools, a lack of men, piano scenes, and emotional relationship rather than physical ones and turned the dial up to 11. For better or worse, it single-handedly revived the Class S genre and was copied (and parodied) endlessly for over a decade. However much I complain about S I actually do not think that we would have the current age of yuri without its popularity and proliferation at the beginning of the century so I owe a big thank you to Maria Watches Over Us for that. Ignoring its historical importance and literary significance the anime still presents an engaging plot with wonderful characters and more butchered French than my last trip to Europe. It is certainly worth a watch and worthy of a place on this list.

What do you think should be on this list?:

YuriMother: As I previously said, this is a pretty perfect list. As far as missing titles I can think of the following.

Simoun - not the greatest in terms of plot or animation but it had cute service and a fun action-packed plot.

Kashimashi: Girl Meets Girl - This series may be strange and present the dreaded love triangle but it did its best to tell a transgender narrative in 2006, naturally this involved aliens, and I applaud it for its attempts.

Cannan - This series is light on the yuri but heavy on the suspense, action, and amazing character designs. The terrorist plot is exciting and the final train fight featured in the series is one of the greatest action spectacles in anime that somehow manages to remain grounded.

OG:

-Harukana Receive: Best all-female sports anime ever made. Plus the gayness is not subtle at all.

-Mikagura Gakuen Kumikyoku: Eruna Ichinomiya is an underrated yuri icon. While not the first of her kind (That honor, I think, goes to Galaxy Fraulein Yuna) she set the standard of cool and inspirational badass lesbian protagonists who are proud of who they are and...also happen to be super perverts. Eruna made it cool to be such a protagonist. It is nice seeing a lesbian lead who does not care what anyone else thinks. She is hungry for cute girl booties. While she often loses her control in the presence of pure beauty she, as an inspiration for others like her, has enough self-control to not go overboard (most of the time).

-Symphogear: Symphogear is love, Symphogear is life. Hopefully Season 5 will keep up the good work.

-Rinne no Lagrange: My favorite mecha anime and the reason I embrace OT3s when the signs are there. Not the greatest but man was it fun. Plus Madoka Kyouno is still sexy.

-Yuki Yuna wa Yuusha de Aru: My favorite Moepocalypse anime of all time. Yuna X Togo taught me to love and trust some people outside my closest family again.

-Mouretsu Pirates: If someone were to ask me “Hey OG. What to you is the perfect anime?”. I would tell them Mouretsu/Bodacious Space Pirates.

-Kashimashi: Girl Meets Girl. Thanks to the first fan commenting and reminding me of it. Definitely worthy of a spot. #HazumuWasAlwaysFemale

Final Thoughts:

OG: Pretty good list and close to what mine would look like were I to make one. Reason I have yet to do so is because I do not feel confident enough to pick a favorite yuri anime of all time. Favorite yuri manga and couples? That I can do, but anime always seems to give me a hard time choosing my absolute favorites. Like I said though, a potential yuri list of mine would look something like this. I also found it interesting how similar the Top 10 are among both our respective fanbases and visitors to the poll conducted by the Akiba Research Institute.

YuriMother: I may have done most the complaining and left the praise to OG but I actually and really happy with this list. I think that every title presented is a worthy addition and while I would certainly move some higher or lower than their current placing I do not believe that these are too far off from my own opinions, which is surprising for a popularity poll. More than anything I am thrilled to see that works I dislike that I thought to be popular did not make this list. Perhaps I should have more faith in people and their opinions. Everyone did such a wonderful job voting and I am so grateful!

Thank you so much everyone for reading and for voting in the top yuri anime poll. To see the full results of the poll and to support yuri news, reviews, and content, check out the YuriMother Patreon. Happy Pride Month

[illusion-reality-steve]

Reaction to the Green and Violet Steves collapsing

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EnydId-c2Jw

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ub8qFvv-tFQ

RQ!Elemental. Is. Awesome.

His body language and his chat dialogue is absolute A+. His body language and the way he moves just says so much about him and I already have an amazing feel of his character.

What really throws me off, but also intrigues me, is that he killed that Green Steve for being vocal and pessimistic. Like bro, you’re supposed to help protect these guys! Killing off people because you think “they’re too far gone to save” is a really, really dark thing to do. But I also appreciate the conflict this brings to the table. This makes me think that Elemental can be a grimdark anti-hero, and this brings new conflict among the heroes that I hope gets explored more.

RQ!Time is also amazing. I love how optimistic he is and trying to get his brother under control and keeping the others hopeful. He reminds me of why I enjoy SS!Time; Time is just being good for the sake of being good. No hidden selfish motives, no dark twists. Just a guy being nice because he wants to be nice. Those kinds of people make me happy.

Green Leader’s sacrifice is very noble. And I like how RQ explored the idea of mind control. The Darkness controls Steves, but it also lets some of their personality remain. And these two episodes really show a battle between optimism and pessimism, which was something established in S1 by Nightmare Steve. I really hope this theme is properly developed by the end of this arc!

And Sabre is being proactive and saying that they need to go find and stop Void Steve. Yeeeesssss.

I really enjoyed these episodes. However, these episodes also have some moments that are glaring issues to me.

****

My main gripe about the Violet Steve episode was the pacing. Why did they stand around to talk before rushing to save the Violet Steves? Couldn’t “Elemental destroys Green Steve” be moved to the end of the episode? I think it would be more fitting there.

Another negative comment I have about these two episodes is that Rainbow Steve is just...sabotaging himself. Like, we finally see Rainbow do something proactive, and he uses that moment to just spawn a big bed to take a nap and sabotage his own character arc.

It really rubs me the wrong way because I can’t believe that the Hero would choose to opt out of a sneaky rescue mission. The Hero is Main Orange Steve; he snuck past Darkness before to save his Orange Steve family when they were kidnapped by Nightmare and Dark. He can easily do it again to save the Green Steves; there was no reason for him to opt out.

And I interpret that Rainbow actively chose to self-sabotage himself, which is why I have a problem with this. I don’t think Rainbow is depressed and can’t find the motivation to rescue someone, because he still had the energy to build a gigantic bed to sleep in and the energy to teleport/row a boat. I don’t think he was being lazy or having a bad day.. He just, for some reason, chose to not help out, and it didn’t seem like he did that out of fear of making a mistake.

The “Elemental destroys Green” scene (and the rock-paper-scissors scene) being in front of the Violet rescue mission also did a disservice to Rainbow’s character. If Rainbow Steve was really trying his best, he would had rushed into the Violet portal before Elemental got a chance to hear that infected Green Steve’s cries. But he didn’t. He just kept procrastinating. This is the same Rainbow who told Sabre “we’re missing our pink friend” when he’s concerned about Gerald’s safety.

Listen, I know what it’s like to avoid responsibilities or be unfocused because of stress and mental illness (I’m literally writing this post because I’m too anxious and want to avoid college work rn). I’m trying to word this in a way that doesn’t dismiss the struggles of any person in real life. Which is why I’m really highlighting that I’m interpreting Rainbow Steve’s latest (lack of) action as something besides mental illness, which is why I’m currently finding him unrelatable.

And it really bothers me. So much that when the infected Violet Steve yelled at Rainbow, my suspension of disbelief just completely shattered.

I just didn’t like that scene at all. I find it hard to believe that the words of one Violet Steve that Rainbow doesn’t really know is enough to push him to the breaking point. I find it hard to believe because I don’t think Rainbow even tried in the first place. I guess this scene can highlight that Rainbow is naive and sensitive, and the Darkness can easily break him down. But since the lack of proactive heroes in this series bothers me so much, I’m just really fussing about how Rainbow doesn’t even feel like the main character of his own story.

Also, I feel like the infected Violet Steve’s cries could be more personalized. Violet Steve’s are all about love. I think it would be interesting to see the idea of love turned on its head. Like we see the Violet Steve accuse Rainbow of not having enough love in his heart because he didn’t prioritize saving the Violet Steves.

Anyways, my rants are going in circle. So I’ll stop here. Overall, good episodes that I’ll watch again because Sabre, Rainbow’s voice actor, Elemental’s body actor, and everyone else did a great job with conveying the emotions. But Rainbow Steve’s role of these episodes will continue to bother me.

I’m just...really confused about Rainbow Steve’s character.

Is he supposed to be naive and only now realizing the weight of his responsibilities? Is he mentally ill and/or neurodivergent? Or is he just being Rainbow Steve? Or is he all three of these at the same time? I don’t know what I’m supposed to take away from him. I’m worried that I forgot about something in my interpretation of his character, or that I’m dismissing something important about real people who struggle with mental illness.

If you have your own two cents about Rainbow Steve’s character arc, please share them with me. I’d love to hear other perspectives about him so I can better understand/interpret him ;-;