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remimibanana · 6 months

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Nintendo 3DS Retrospective Part 3: A System's Function Continued

I hit the image limit on the previous part, and there's so many more screenshots I want to share with you all! I won't let the limit stop me from blabbing on!

Here is the third part where I continue on about all the system functions and other software I didn't have a chance to show in the other parts. This retrospective was originally one part, and then it became two, and then it became three....

Part 3 is under the cut!

Nintendo 3DS Camera

For the DS/3DS line, one of the main features is the dual cameras featured on the inside and outside of the system. To go with the camera, you need a camera application!

It is a simple application that lets you take photos and videos, and view them all. I used to spend a lot of time here, messing around with all the effects you could set and recording random videos here and there.

You couldn't record any videos on the DSi, so I went a little crazy with it back when. I still have all the old photos and videos I took, although the quality of the photos aren't that great.

It honestly feels like a downgrade from the Nintendo DSi Camera, as there are less effects and ways to edit your image. I miss distorting my images!

But it still was pretty cool to use.

Nintendo 3DS Sound

The DS/3DS line also had a microphone, so of course we need an application that lets you record voice clips and listen to music!

I loved recording myself. I would record the most weirdest of things that makes me wonder what I was thinking back then.

Let me list some of the highlights:

Me swearing very intensely for no real reason in particular, I think I just wanted to say “god damn piece of shit” while emphasizing the last part.

Me singing the beginning to Dragostea Din Tei because I really like this song.

Me singing the entirety of the English cover of A Female Ninja, but I Want To Love because I was really into Yandere Simulator for a bit.

My brother saying “asshole” over and over.

Me recording myself saying a garble of words when reversed, would sound like me saying “moving on the ground”, like Mario.

A whole bunch of calls from Stevo, my quail I used to have.

There is Streetpass, but I never knew how to use it back then. I still don’t know how to use it in fact, it won’t let me add anything to the Streetpass playlist in order for me to turn on Streetpass for this application.

Perhaps one day, I’ll be able to try it out.

Nintendo eShop

Even though it shut down a while ago, you still can use it at the time I post this retrospective.

I really love the eShop a lot. It had soul and our little shopping bag guy. I was there when the shutdown occurred, downloading any last games or demos I wanted.

It looks rather empty without everything...but I'm glad we still can access it and listen to the banger BGM! I always have a smile on my face when I come on here.

I used to spend a lot of time on here as a kid when I had access to the internet, downloading a whole bunch of demos and exploring what games there was!

One time, my dad put $50 into my account since he saw I was on it with his card. I remember being so grateful, he didn't have to put in any money!

I could have bought a single game, but I bought multiple smaller games since I went a little crazy. You can't blame kid me, $50 was a lot of money to me!

From memory, I bought:

Colors 3D

Pokemon Dream Radar

Crystal Monsters

A Shaun the Sheep Episode Set

I wish I could go back to the heyday. It's crazy to think I bought these things over 10 years ago....

I love the Other Settings menu. I used to spend my time here scrolling through it all, seeing what each of the options did. The BGM makes me really emotional when I hear it.

Before the shutdown occurred, I spent over five minutes on this screen trying not to cry. It feels like a part of my childhood got stripped away without my consent. I know we still can use it, but one day....they will stop it too.

Thank you, Nintendo eShop!

Face Raiders

I liked this game a lot! I'm surprised people didn't, I think it's rather charming!

This is my favourite opening animation, the faces sing in a row but the last one messes up and the others gang up on that face.

I used to play this a lot back when I got my red 3DS, since it was one of the only games already on the system. You take a picture of someone's face and then hit the shit out of it with balls over and over in various stages.

My favourite mode was "Share the Fun", especially the underwater stage. I know it was meant for someone else to try out the game, but I used to do it for myself!

Every time it would say to pass the system over to the other person, I would pretend to pass it to myself.

In the underwater stage, you hit someone's face over and over before it falls down onto the floor, with a new version of the face appearing when you destroy it.

I used to always challenge myself to beat my record.

I've never actually beat the final boss in this game, surprisingly. I have the Final Stage unlocked, but I never understood how to beat it. The whole laser thing went over my head, and I think it still does to this day.

I vow to beat it at some point!

Internet Browser

A very simple browser that had limited functionality, especially on the original 3DS line.

I didn’t really use it much when I was a kid, since I had no internet. I did like going on it anyway to get nowhere. I think I tried to use Youtube on here a few times, which didn't load any videos as you might have guessed.

I did log into Twitter before they removed the legacy support since it would have been a missed opportunity otherwise!

You can download images from here, which is what I used it for mainly! You search up the image on Google, view the full sized image and click on "Save Image"!

Not all images could be saved though.

They had to 480 x 480 or below and even then, it might not work for some reason. I used this feature a lot when I drew on Colors 3DS, so I could colour drop the colours I needed for an artwork.

You could put the image you need on the SD card, but if it doesn’t appear in the Nintendo 3DS Camera, you can’t use it in Colors 3D. I wish it wasn't so complicated.

It’s tough drawing on the 3DS.

Colors Gallery

Speaking of Colors 3DS, this is my opportunity to show the Colors Gallery I was talking about in Part 1! Tumblr limit will always be my enemy.

I love this gallery so much. It's a shame we won't ever see it on the 3DS again after the shutdown, but luckily...it won't completely disappear!

There is the Colors Live gallery online which has all of the 3DS artworks! It’s nice to see that nothing will disappear, although no new artworks will ever be uploaded to the gallery from the 3DS.

It's rather unfortunate. I did make my own account and uploaded some of the artworks I was proud of!

Click here to see my profile!

Here is one of the Tokyo Mew Mew artworks I saved when I was a kid in all its glory. It still looks the same as I remember all those years ago....

Friend List

You're probably wondering, why is the Friend List here?

I really like this part of the system, despite how small of a part it plays. You always go on it to see all your friends, add new ones and set your favourite title!

The BGM is a banger, I could spend hours listening to it without being bored of it. I love how they used your Mii inside this card, they would move and even have their own 3DS while you were playing a game!

I remember trying to add people as a kid but the other person didn’t have my friend code so I would be left with these blank cards while waiting for the other person to be my friend.

Once I realised they would never become my friend, I deleted them after a while. If you have a modded system, you can actually put homebrew software as your favourite title which I find really funny.

“I love the FBI manager so much that I should let everyone know!” - someone probably.

Game Notes

You're also probably wondering, why is the Game Notes here too?

I think it’s one of the functions people often overlook, but I used to use it all the time! You only had three colours you could use and only sixteen notes to draw on which was a bit of a shame.

As you can see above, I used it to draw whatever I felt like. Mostly just Splatoon and Pokémon.

Miiverse

It really is too bad it shutdown.

I didn't get to use it too much back in the day, but I'm glad I was able to use it a bit! I remember looking at everyone's posts and admiring all the wonderful drawings!

I even posted on there too, but I don't remember what I drew. There was an offline mode where you could make a post and save it for later to upload. I wish they kept it, just so we could experience it all again like before.

Swapdoodle

The lovely note application we all know and love!

I decided to make this my last title I'll talk about since I have a lot of memories with it. I used this to draw little notes for myself and my friends, sending them when I felt like doing so.

Nikki is the mascot who writes notes to you and teaches you all the things you can do, unlocking new features as you go. You can put up to four badges as an example, which I like to use a lot since I have many of them.

There was a store you could buy more pencil colours and new note backgrounds, but that stopped working with the eShop shutdown, unfortunately.

I regret not buying a pack or two.

We will never see this little notification appear again. I think it's a shame, but what can you do?

And that's a wrap!

With that, my 3DS retrospective is complete! It was a lot of fun reminiscing. Thank you for all the wonderful memories you have given me, you wonderful handheld.

I wish Nintendo would keep supporting it, but all good things must come to an end. I never thought we would reach this point.

To the next console and beyond!

#3ds retrospective #part 3 #sobbbbbbb #wehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh #noooooo #don't gooooooooooooo

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georgiapeach30513 · 1 year

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As @oh-my-damn pointed out yesterday, deactivating was a statement. He chose to pull himself out of the narrative and basically say “I’m not doing this anymore.”

He could’ve not posted for the rest of summer because he was already barely posting as is. We obviously seen the reason why he’s taken a step back with social media. The remaining fans weren’t happy with him and filled with dread for the possibility of something coming on 7/10.

Do I personally think he’s taking the time off to heat up to get ready to get married? No, the math ain’t mathing for me. Why take the summer off days before your “fiancés” birthday? Why deactivate now and not closer to your wedding date when you need privacy the most? Why are you allegedly building your “family” home that is meant to be more private, but allowing the designers to post every corner of it? (NDA’s are a hell of a thing.)

Truthfully, I think he wanted off of social media after the backlash from his stories on 1/6 and 2/14, but he couldn’t. He had Ghosted to promote. I think things really changed in May. She posted Dodger and someone’s Facebook dad went hard with the trolling. His birthday was surprisingly quiet and I think he was mulling this over for awhile before finally jumping ship.

I do believe it was a statement. To me even posting was statement. You can check when I posted those, I was on my phone at the right time. Because his story and tweet I screenshot almost immediately after they were posted and within s few minutes he had deactivated. All of that was less than five minutes. That was definitely a statement.

He doesn’t post that often. Had he said nothing, we would never know the difference. That’s why I say timing is everything. Right before 7/10. Right after it seems he has no obligation to post about a project. This was a perfect opportunity for a break.

Again with the timing, we have been told he will get married before the end of the year. Honestly, that’s not much time, but even so his fall is going to be busy! And I’m talking about projects that we KNOW. Pain Hustlers press, NYC comic con, Red One press.

So I could be wrong, but someone who hates summer I don’t see getting married in the summer. So he’s getting married and then going straight into work mode for the end of the year?

And if he deactivated to take the heat off himself, he’s leaving his fiancé on social media to fend for herself? You can be private and be a public person. That is possible. You can be a private couple and have a public persona outside of your relationship. The relationship status, privacy, and deactivating do not go hand in hand for me. If he’s coming back it’ll be before PH, so he’ll be back September, the supposed month of a wedding, so that doesn’t add up to he left to have a wedding theory.

I refuse to bring the house talk here. Chris hasn’t talk about this alleged house, and he’s not showed us this alleged house. To me, that’s private. And I agree with all that you said.

And we’re back to timing. He fulfilled his work obligations with social media. He promoted his work, and now he quite possibly has nothing until September/October. Remember when I said after Ghosted it should have been quiet? Instead we’ve got a pottery video, Red One photos in Hawaii (but none of the Rock), Walmart appearance, and an almost two hour podcast that was one on one with Pete Holmes. That’s a lot.

I think a lot changed in May as well. That was the month something happened every weekend. That was the month the trolling had reached a peak and we were all so tired. We got the PT photos as well. Justin’s dad to me was the ultimate troll, and I actually think I came up with a solid excuse for that. I guess…we wait and see 😖

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ninjadudettekira · 2 years

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This art piece made me scream into the fucking void omfg, this was brutal. 77 layers and a lot of folders on Ibis Paint X. Hopefully I didn’t miss any mistakes cause I did when I showed this to Discord, and while I was posting this I almost forgot to unhide Ben’s pillow.

In one of the Ben 10 Discord’s I’m in, someone was like “Hey I’m working on a Ben 10 character mixtape and was tempted to add Brutal by Olivia Rodrigo for Ben just for these lines.” And I was like “Yo I’m tempted to draw that!” And here we are 4 days later. (In app time says like 16 hours and 18 minutes lmao.) More details about the drawing under the cut cause, boy oh boy does Allie have a lot to talk about with this piece.

I used a lot of screenshots from the show as a reference in order to draw how I saw this in my head. The second one was actually a reference to Young Justice episode Misplaced where Billy saw Robin, Kid Flash, and Aqualad on the TVs from the store he was walking past. “I feel like no one wants me” I was originally just going to do only Azmuth and Ben, but I wanted to do a three thing and I ended up going with Julie since their relationship in UA was rocky. (I also debated using Grandpa Max over her, but I couldn’t think of a time where Max was like that.) Also fun fact everytime I kept writing “feel” I did “fell” and took me so long to get it right. I was gonna go with a school background, but I couldn’t get it right so I went with what I did. Y’all know how when your life is a mess everyone seems like a shadow to you and everything around you is fuzzy? That’s what I was going for there. Also the fact that people want Ben for his aliens, not himself. “And I hate the way that I’m perceived” For the news report I did use the screenshot of that pose itself because I honestly couldn’t get it right when trying to freehanded it nor did I want to straight up trace it cause of how I had the TV screens. Figured there was no harm in using the screenshot itself for it. Just like “feel”, I had a tough time writing “perceived” correctly, I kept doing “pre-” over “per-”. Listen pretty sure I’m dyslexic so bare with me, English is hard. “I only have two real friends” Despite the fact that Kevin and Gwen are in their Season 3 Alien Force outfits, this takes place in UA. I went with those outfits for that lyric simply because I wanted to lmao. (And I guess cause it makes more sense cause before Vilgax came back the trio was having a good time? It makes sense I swear.)

“And lately, I’m a nervous wreck” I was originally using a photo of Danny from Danny Phantom as a reference cause he’s been a nervous wreck in some episodes, and I couldn’t remember Ben ever being nervous like how I wanted to draw him to do a reference. But Danny just ended up being thrown out the window when that wasn’t working out, ended up doing what I did though. I was originally gonna color the floor, but I was playing around with brushes on Ibis and that happened. I kept it cause it worked for what I was going for lol.

Also just a FYI, my DeviantArt is Kira Sema so that’s why my watermark in the panels say that over my actual name/username here. I’m trying to keep my newer artwork with a consistent watermark that leads somewhere if someone were to look up the name. (Despite the fact I’m still very backlogged on uploading old/current artwork to my DA.)

#Ben 10 #ben 10 fanart #ben 10 uaf #ben 10 alien force #ben 10 ultimate alien #ben 10 art #ben tennyson #gwen tennyson #kevin levin #azmuth #julie yamamoto #brutal olivia rodrigo #lyric art #Fun fact I don't even have this song on my playlist yet I drew a whole goddamn art piece of it #Sad Ben hours #One of these days imma make an animatic cause I've had ideas for my own stuff lol

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juustwoke-up · 8 months

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“When I weirdly start catching feelings out of nowhere for the most unexpected person.”

Saw her at school. Saying to myself that she looks familiar.. (first week of being back at school) Small talk with her and her friends at the school library. Kinda clicked since we have the same age. Treated her as one of my friend at school. Admired her neat handwriting. The way she talks.. Her Aura.

Small talk during KS10, by her side.

Another small talk outside the classroom (night class). Which she was kind of avoiding me? Not in the mood? Idk but i don’t have a crush on her yet. Just remembered it.

Idk when it started but, everyday.. my eyes started to look for her.

Bringing my camera cause one day she asks if i bought my camera. which i didn’t but ever since that, i bring it with me. (whipped) she has a lot of pictures in my camera.

Fast forward.. knowing someone is courting her. starting to think that they will get together. seeing them together with their circle of friends. avoiding any close distance with her. but my eyes are always at her. (they never got together btw)

Me, my friends and her circle of friends ate ramen around our barangay. (idk why i even go with them, i know its around my area but idk idk idk why i go there)

Christmas party. She’s cute when she’s angry. At the end of the party, i helped her clean our area. Yes, just me and her. handed her a tissue and just cleaned up the leftover foods. (Look at me so helpful)

I sent a gdrive link full of the photos taken at the party to our class group chat (which i didn’t often use/chat there) she hearted it and said thanks to me.

Got happy cause i don’t have to see her face for a month. (I don’t want to fall hard. oh well) She added me on fb (i screenshotted it) damn it. (now i see all of her posts and stories)

Maintaining my distance. (not really cause my mind is always trying to do everything just to see her) my eyes is fixated at her everyday.

Got a solo moment with her during signing of clearance but we’re both awkward and she got up and go to where are classmates all are. bummer but of course what am i even gonna do. such a loser.

Here I am writing all of these to the unexpected person i start having feelings “out of nowhere”.

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kmgkmg · 1 year

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“almost included a lil text abt hosh accidentally adding joshua to a gc that he meant to add vernon and gyu to....hosh wouldve sent something like "so how long do yall wanna bet it's going to be until they're engaged" and joshua would wait for everyone to place their bets and then be like "well now you all owe me money since we just got engaged" *sends a pic of his hand and an engagement ring* BUT ALAS. i settled on a dating anniversary instead. just know in that universe, they would eventually get married (an extra little epilogue just for you anon)”

ynshie….marriage…..real…..(i explode into tiny little pieces) i actually screamed and nearly rolled off my bed when i read “well now you all owe me money since we just got engaged” like i prayed for times like these FR!!! (i dont think ill ever get over ynshie ever this extra epilogue will live in my brain thank you so so much 😭😭🫶🫶)

also THERE WAS A PLAYLIST BREAKDOWN?? actually dropping everything to read it all while listening to the playlist im so excited to read it rn tysm <33

(also i just noticed that u posted a ww fic??? omw to read it rn . angst will not stop me) (i will eat my words soon)

-⛺️

put my reply under the cut so our message won't be too long on the dashboard but 😗🫳*picks up the little pieces of u one by one that have exploded*

BUT YEAHHHHH!!!! there are so many lil headcanons abt this fic anonnie!!!!!!!!!! since u like the lil nuggets.. i'll shower u in some unused photos and their What Ifs!!

1...firework/sparkler pic: remember the tweet after cabin wars when joshua realized how cute reader looked when they were happy...yeah reader would've had that realization too on the 4th!!!!! joshua probably asked vernon to take the pic and he would post it on main being kinda fuckboyish but reader and joshua would (obliviously) be flirting in the comments. like get together alr 🙄 2...vernon/josh preoccupied on their phones: reader would send this pic to hoshi and be like "they've been trying to figure out how to load a tiktok compilation vid onto the tv for the kids...who's gna tell them that i hid the remote? 😝" reader just being chaotic since hoshi would b gone that day for personal reasons or smthn 3...joshua bed pic: I WAS SOOOOO TEMPTED TO USE THIS ONE! the thing is though it looks soooooo like Professionally taken, yknow? but it would've been vernon being a little cupid, texting reader like "we mentioned your name and suddenly bro is wide awake" LIKE LOOK HOW PRECIOUS HE LOOKS???? it could pass for him being infatuated w you and UGHHH yeah!!

4...mud masks: the camp has rewarded the counselors for taking care of the campers all summer! free spa day for all of them! except nobody told joshua and hoshi where the mud bath was and the spa was nature themed so um. when they saw a pool outside of the changing rooms with mud, they automatically thought that it must be the place w rejuvenating mud for the skin! yeah no...it's just an old pool that hasn't been cleaned. so they have actual dirty mud/clay on their face. reader and vernon come back from buying snacks like ??????? how are you so muddy when we didn't even tell you where to go??? and reader takes that pic of them just utterly shocked like !!!!!! wym that pool wasn't even a part of the spa?!!??!! 5...karaoke night: again, a counselors only type of event. they would go to the local pub and have fun (maybe drink, maybe not idk!) but you and hoshi would encourage joshua to sing and vernon to rap! joshua would go after you kept whining, he's a sucker for you, and ofc start singing sunday morning. reader would tweet the video and caption it like "living up to the username i see @/sundaymorning" 6...pfp: ok this one is the most nugget of nuggets but i was considering making this joshua's pfp/icon for reader and joshua's texts! it would b for after they're together! i was gna add a bit abt how he makes funny faces to cheer reader up. he made that face one day during one of your facetimes, so you screenshotted it and always look at his contact pic when you feel down!

if you did get the chance to check out the breakdown i would b soooo interested to know which song(s) u think fits the series the best!! i def have my own picks for the ones i listened to a lot and used the most 🤭

THE WONU FIC!!!!!!!! my friend is a wonu stan and i was texting her like... yeah almost done w the wonu angst.. and she was like WONWOO?? ANGST????? 🤲 it was soooo funny bcos she's v chill but she was eating up the little sections of the fic that i was sending her hehe

i also made two mbs on my other sb for the wonwoo fic: one based more on the vibes and one based on the aes! the one w wonwoo's face kinda flopped and i'm like 👁️ interesting... @ the followers on that blog

sorry for the late reply!! but hope u had a nice day <333

#kmgkmganswers #⛺️ anon #ive been offline p much all day :OOOO which is wild consindering ive been up since 6:30 am (it's 9:45 pm my time)

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daidoruyume · 1 year

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Chapter 10 New song release

Kaho had left early, at 6AM, and I was alone with my thoughts once again. I could still feel Miyuu's lips in mine, not to mention I had another dream where it was just us two. I started feeling like I was even deeper in love with her. Whenever she liked my comments, or when we talked during the meet and greets, I considered myself lucky. But being kissed…? That was bigger than luck, right? It was something else. Something bigger. Destiny, maybe.

I happily skipped my first class in the morning. I looked so, but so silly… but that happiness I was feeling, oh, no one could take it from me. The day passed so quickly, and everything seemed so bright. During my lunch break I got to open Twitter and see what Miyuu had posted.

There were backstage and after-party pictures of the girls, and lots of "Thank you". But, I finally knew, amongst all the fans, I was very special.

There was, though, an announcement. Because of the great reception they had, they would start releasing the solos earlier as Digital Singles, and the album and the title and b-side would be released on the assigned date. Miyuu was going to release Hanabi at midnight. As usual, I commented on it, saying I was excited and that the concert was great. Only Miyuu and I would ever know what actually had made me truly happy.

It wasn't uncommon for her to like my comments, but she didn't reply often. This time, though, she did.

@miyuukiway

It was great to see such a memorable face once again. I hope you have recovered well from what happened yesterday. Let's do our best today, too!

I had to show it off. For obvious reasons, no matter how great it was, I couldn't just tell everyone Miyuu had kissed me. But I could tell everyone she had remembered I passed out (and it was quite a known topic from that day) and wished me a good recovery. Of course, I screenshot it and Tweeted it. Miyuu was so kind… I couldn't wait to see her again… I couldn't wait to be wrapped in her arms.

The rest of the day went by quite slowly, now that I was excited for her new song. When I arrived home I was quite tired, but I kept thinking of Miyuu and it gave me a lot of strength. I ate, showered, did my little chores and enjoyed my time leisurely until the clock hit midnight. The PV appeared in the front of their YouTube page and I was finally able to watch it. I was so excited!

It opened with Miyuu dressed in a Yukata, in some kind of festival. She sang about star-crossed lovers, but that had to be apart. Still, whenever they saw fireworks, they would remind of their love and their hearts found peace. I soon recognized that scenery, from years ago. I knew it from my childhood, when I had met a girl there. A weird feeling started taking over my body, and I was surrounded by "what if?s". But… that couldn't be, right? The MV ended with a photo of Miyuu as a child, in that festival. And with that, I had no doubts. It was Miyuu that I met years ago.

I wanted to go on Twitter to talk about the PV and the song, that were absolutely amazing, but that realization… it froze me. I couldn't do anything. It was… it was so crazy how I wasn't simply a fan, or someone delusional, but rather someone she had been looking for. Someone she promised she would go back to. But, now… how was I going to tell her that? There was literally no way to privately message her, and I was afraid that if I, for example, sent her a letter, the staff would read it. I could only wait for Miyuu to reach out for me. Somewhat troubled, I fell asleep.

#daidoruyume

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biglisbonnews · 2 years

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Pedro Pascal Remembers Everything About Being on 'Buffy' Sarah Michelle Gellar would like to remind everyone that before we fell in love with him on The Mandalorian and The Last of Us, a young Pedro Pascal was already winning over hearts on Buffy: The Vampire Slayer — and nobody is happier about it than the actor himself.Related | Of Course, Dolly Parton Was an Uncredited Producer on 'Buffy'Gellar shared a screenshot of her titular vampire slayer alongside Pascal's character Edward, who appeared on an episode during the show's fourth season, with the caption “When #Mother met #Father.” Avid Buffy fans may remember Pascal's stint on the show was brief, with awkward college student Edward befriending Buffy on his first day only to end up getting turned by a vampire named Sunday and having to be staked by the end of the episode. See on Instagram The post was a cute throwback by Gellar that only got all the more wholesome when an Entertainment Tonight reporter showed it to Pascal on the red carpet premiere of The Mandalorian's third season. “Sarah Michelle Gellar posted about me?” Pascal reacted to the news, remarking that “I need to get on the World Wide Web” (an endearingly boomer thing to say). @entertainmenttonight Our Pedro Pascal interview turned into him stanning Sarah Michelle Gellar and I’m not mad about it. 🥰 #pedropascal #thelastofus #themandalorian Pascal went on to gush about Gellar, recalling the night shoot in vivid detail, from the ice cream they shared in her trailer to her teaching him how to use a sandbag to hit his mark. Pascal seemed to have nothing but fond memories of the shoot, remembering that he had to miss the opening night of a play in Long Beach he was starring in to film a small portion of the episode. “I had to have lunch in the vamp mask," he said. "I remember everything.”Pascal continued to gush to Access Hollywood in another interview, remarking that he couldn't wait to get his phone back so he could see the post for himself. "I remember every moment of shooting that episode, as brief as it was," he told the outlet. "She was such a kind scene partner and we had the best time." Naturally, Pascal was quick to return the social media love, replying to Gellar sharing a clip of the red carpet interview on her Instagram Story: "As if I could ever forget you."Photo via Getty/ Axelle/Bauer-Griffin/ FilmMagic https://www.papermag.com/pedro-pascal-buffy-2659491629.html

#Sarah michelle gellar #Buffy the vampire slayer #Buffy #Throwback #The mandalorian #The last of us #Pedro pascal #Matt Moen #PAPER

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neechees · 2 years

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George Sand / Mad Max Fury Road / Postcolonial Love Poem, Natalie Diaz / Jibaro (Love, Sex, and Robots) / The hobbit: he Battle of the Five Armies / / Princess Mononoke / EU smashes 2020 climate target / Lord of the Rings, Return of the King / Katherine Mansfield / Princess Mononoke

It’s not too late.

[Image description: 10 photos stacked vertically.

The first photo is a screenshot of a letter that reads: “...affection. what an age! everyone is dying, everything is dying, and the earth is dying also, eaten up by the sun and the wind. i don't know where i get the courage to keep on living in the midst of these ruins. Let us love each other to the end. You write me very little, I worry about you. G Sand.”

The second is a gif of a scene from “Mad Max, Fury Road”, featuring the character Furiosa at a side angle. She has a shaven head and is an amputee missing her left arm from the forearm down. She sits on her knees in the sand, wind blowing the sand towards the camera. She breathes heavily and screams in despair.

Third of the photos is a screenshot from an entry by Natalie Diaz, which reads, “In Mojave thinking, body and land are the same. The words are separated only by the letters ’ii and ’a: ’iimat for body, ’amat for land. In conversation, we often use the a shortened form for each: mat-. Unless you know the context of a conversation you might not know if we are speaking about our body or our land. You might not know which has been injured, which is remembering, which is alive, which was dreamed, which needs care. You might not know we mean both.If I say, My river is disappearing, do I also mean, My people are disappearing?“.

The fourth is a gif photo from an episode of Love, Sex, and Robots, featuring one of its main characters, a siren. The color palette is greyish in tone and dull. The siren has short hair and black eyeliner streaming down her face. The Siren was once made of gold and jewels, but in the gif she has been stripped of this and left with few gold or jewels, with only seemingly a naked and tattered cloth underneath, and she gazes at her arms and body with a horrified expression, and sobbing.

The fifth photo features a screenshot from an article about The Hobbit, which reads, “...burying it deep into the earth. When asked what it is, he replies “It’s a promise. That beneath all that blood and dirt, there is a chance of new life. It may sound hopeless, it may sound foolish, but really what else can you do when you’re faced with death? What can anyone do? You go on living.”

The Sixth photo is a gif from the film Princess Mononoke, showing a bald character, Gonza, carrying an injured character, lady Eboshi, on his back. Eboshi’s face is concealed by a red hat. Gonza sloshes through dark water amidst a dying forest, and he surveys the giant trees dying and falling to the ground in awe.

The Seventh photo is a screenshot from an article, reading, “Total greenhouse gas emissions in the European Union reached their lowest level since 1990, according to official EU data reported this week by the European Environment Agency to the UN.The overall reduction in 2020 greenhouse gas emissions was 34% compared to the 1990 base year, or 1.94 billion tons of CO2.”

The eighth of the photos is a screencap from Lord of the Rings, Return of the King. It shows the decapitated head of an old statue of a King, laying in the grass. white flowers and vines grow about the bearded statue’s head, forming a flower crown.

The ninth photo features a quote from Katherine Mansfield, posted by the user tristealven, which reads, “ I have spent days just walking about or sitting on a stone in the sun and listening to the bees in the almond trees and the wild pear bushes and coming home in the evening with rosemary on my fingers and wild thyme on my toes—tired out with the loveliness of the world.”

The final photo is a gif from the film Princess Mononoke, with giant tree roots reaching out and into clear, blue water. The trees are dead and greyish, but small plants, saplings, moss, and flowers grow from them, indicating new life and that they will be replaced. Among the new plants emerges a partially translucent kodama spirit, with a tiny, chubby body, large roundish head, and two dots on its face. The kodama walks in and faces the camera before clicking its head to the side. End image description.]

#web weaving #justin's edits #long post

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scarlettriot · 3 years

Text

Stood Up

You (Y/N) get stood up from a date and Kaminari decides to do something about it.

Pairing: Kaminari/F!Reader

Contains: Fluff, Flirty Denki, Established BakuSquad Friendship

Warnings: 18+ Below the cut, Minors DNI! Swearing, Electro-Stim, Overstimulation, use of pet names (cuddle bug & cutie), oral (F receiving), consensual recording

A/N: Well, here we are with the third in my Stood Up series. There is also Bakugo & Kirishima if you're interested. This one took me way too long and it's also my first time writing Kaminari at length. I hope you all like it :)

Word Count Starting Below: 2,461

You slipped your foot into the silver heels you had picked out. Something a little fancier since this was a first date after all and you wanted to make a lasting impression. Not only that but this was your first first date in a while. Being a Pro Hero made life busy and dating difficult.

Practically the entire day leading up to this very moment revolved around you either getting ready or babbling with excitement to your closest friends.

An alert chimed on your phone with a text from your date, a smile sliding onto your face expecting to read some message about how they were on their way and that they'd see you soon, but that wasn't what you were met with.

Instead, it was a screenshot of your Instagram page, multiple of them actually, all of you and the ridiculous photos you took with your friends but mostly with one Denki Kaminari. The most recent of which was from a tea shop he met you at just earlier that day so you could show him the shoes for your date.

The message below was simple and more than enough to leave a sour taste in your mouth, this isn't what I want to see when I'm supposed to be taking you out tonight. What, one date a day isn't enough? Why are you even dating? Does your blonde boyfriend know?

You giggled at what they were implying, quick to explain how these were all your friends, they had been since high school! They are people you spent what little free time you had with. Especially Denki, your best friend since you were 15!

That joy you felt started dissipating within the next few messages. You hadn't even had a first date and they were already jealous, and that was something you didn't have room for in your life. So, you slipped the heels off your feet and put them directly back in the box to return when you had the time. Tight black jeans and fitted top were exchanged with a hoodie and sweats although your makeup and hair stayed done, you didn't have the energy to undo your hard work.

Instead, you slid back into your computer chair, your headset snuggly back on your ears and before you notified everyone you were back online, you took a moment listening to the chatter of your friends.

"Shitty Hair! Fuckin' pay attention!"

"Yeah, man! We're getting slaughtered over here!"

"Less yelling at Kiri! More shooty shooty!"

"All of you are hopeless..."

Eijiro chuckled out an apology that was accompanied by a lighter giggle also coming from his mic. "Think this is gonna be my last round for a bit, guys."

"You're so fuckin' whipped." Bakugo scoffed, before screaming profanities.

"Is it whipped if I'm the one who's wanting to get her into bed though?"

You clicked your mic back on then. "Hey, remember last week when Kats forgot his push to talk so we all heard him getting head and we party whipped because someone couldn't focus?"

"You better shut the hell up right fucking now!"

Everyone else roared with laughter. "Yeah! At least I have the decency to mute myself!"

"Hey, wait a sec, why are you online, Y/N!" Denki noted, "You should have already left!"

You screenshot your messages to the group chat because it was far easier than just explaining the ordeal.

"Cute shoes." Eijiro and Kyoka commented at the same time.

There was a lull as their game ended and the messages were read.

"Ya don't need 'em if they're gonna have their head so far up their ass like this."

"I agree." Hanta chimed in. "They're not worth your time."

"Still, sorry they turned out to be a shit." You could hear the frown on Kyoka's face, "I know how excited you were."

"Right, you doin' okay, Y/N? I can stick around and we can all shoot some things!"

"Thanks, Kiri but I'll be just fine! Go spend time with your girl!"

One by one, everyone signed off. You pulled up Spotify and Stardew Valley, something of a comfort for you to get lost in for the rest of the night.

Less than an hour later, you noticed your phone lighting up with your best friend's familiar smiling face. "What's up, Denki?"

"Open your door! I have my hands full and don't wanna put everything down to get my key!"

You sprang from your desk and rushed to your door. Sure enough, on the other side was Denki with bags in both hands and his phone tucked between his ear and shoulder. You grabbed it and a bag before he had a chance to drop anything like the klutz he was. "What's with all this?"

"I feel bad."

"Why? You didn't stand me up?"

He fiddled with the edge of a paper bag. "Yeah, but, we both read those messages and no one said anything but they didn't just call our group out, they called us out.

"Denks, it doesn't matter to me-"

"But, it does to me! You were so excited about this and I got in the way, unknowingly but, still! So, I gotta make it up to you now!"

He pulled out take-out boxes from your favorite restaurant. Two bottles of your favorite wine. Your top three favorite movies and video games, and a board game you both had been meaning to try. "I mean, if they think I'm your boyfriend I kinda gotta live up to the hype, right?"

You really wanted to insist that none of this was necessary. That just because some person that neither of you really knew that well, assumed something about your relationship that didn't mean he had to blame himself for it.

But, you had to admit, this was really sweet. It shouldn't have come as a surprise to you that he knew everything you liked but it was nice. Instead of sitting across from a stranger, making awkward small talk, and trying to learn about one another, you were barefoot in your kitchen, laughing with your best friend while he plated dinner and you poured the wine.

Formalities were out the window. Both you and Denki were eating dinner in your living room, laughing and drinking just as you'd done a million times before. You snapped a photo of the delicious food on paper plates, toasting good times with your cheap wine, ready to post them to your Instagram.

"Gonna make them more jealous..."

"I think they made it pretty clear they don't want to see me so why should I care?"

He shrugged. "I just thought they might, you know, come to their senses that they obviously lost."

"I don't really care either way." You wandered back into your kitchen, putting away the leftovers, "They can forget I exist or they can stalk my page like a creep. If someones' gonna try and tell me I can't be friends with my friends or just not listen to me, then I don't want them in my life. No matter how good-looking they are."

Denki watched you from the sofa, a bit of a lopsided grin on his face that had butterflies taking flight in your stomach. "What?" Laughing to hide the bit of a crush you always had on the man. It was unavoidable you told yourself. His personality was infectious and had 15 year old you head over heels.

He pushed back bright blonde hair back off his forehead and just shook his head. "Nothin'. Uh, what's next? Video game, board game, or movie?"

You peaked on the counter at the options. "Well, we probably should have checked this but the board game needs at least four people to play... guess we'll have to save that for our next game night. Is a movie okay?"

Of course, it was.

You brought over the DVD with a refill of wine and he pulled a blanket down off the back of your sofa.

It really didn't take long, just fifteen minutes or so, and you were curled up into Denki's side. You'd make grabby hands for your wine glass and he'd pass it over with that damn grin again.

And not long after that, he'd pulled out his phone, angling it to take a picture of the two of you. "What are you doing?" You could see him on his own Instagram, tagging you, with the caption, Check out my cute cuddle bug.

"I thought you didn't want to make them more jealous."

"I decided I don't care either. You're mine tonight, their loss. And since you're mine tonight, I get bragging rights." He snapped another quick picture of you rolling your eyes at him, and then he kept snapping them.

"Denki! Why!"

"Because you're cute, cuddle bug! I like having all the pictures of you that I can!"

Even as you tackled him back down on the sofa, pinning him below you, he still managed a photo. "Bet if I post this one, they'll really get the wrong idea."

You could have moved. You were the one on top of him and you had his arms above his head. You had the power here and yet you just lingered above him.

"Y/N? Not that I'm one to complain about having a beautiful person such as yourself pinning me down, like, it's kinda hot, but..." Looking down into half-lidded golden eyes, you wondered why you had to become best friends with such a damn flirt! "Are you gonna take advantage of this situation we're in or are we just gonna keep dancing around this for another decade or so?"

You couldn't have heard him right? No... no this was your brain playing tricks on you because he certainly hadn't had that much wine tonight. You sat upright on his lap. "Another decade then, Y/N?"

"You- ha- you should stop that, Denki."

He leaned up, moving his arms around you, "Gimme a good reason to and I will."

You didn't have one. And not just because you've been in love with him for ten years but also because he was your best friend. The only reason to not go through with it was the possibility of losing your friendship if something bad were to happen but, you really didn't think anything would.

Denki might have been a serial flirt but he was surprisingly loyal in all the relationships he'd been in, not that there had been all that many serious ones.

"I'm not hearing anything." He teased, his face getting closer to yours. You could count each and every one of the faint freckles that littered the balls of his cheeks and the bridge of his nose. "But, I promise, if you tell me no, I'll stop, won't push this any further."

This whole thing seemed like a frickin' whirlwind, happening faster than your brain could really process the situation but you didn't want it to stop either. You wanted to take it further, didn't want to say no.

Which was why you coiled your arms around his neck and kissed him deeply. There was that small little buzz of electricity that tickled your lips when he'd kiss your nose or cheeks that was now playing on his lips, on his tongue when you welcomed him in.

He leaned back again, pulling you with him until you were both a pile of needy hands and breathy pleas. Everywhere his hands roamed you felt that faint trail of shock against your skin, making the little hairs on your body stand on end.

Clothes were shed, tossed haphazardly around your living room, both of you pausing to laugh when Denki managed to land your hoodie over a lamp. His attention was drawn back to you quickly though, still perched on top of him but now he had your chest on full display since you'd forgone a bra when your date canceled.

Electrifying tongue twirled around your nipples, sensitive normally, now it felt like you knew what it was like when he fried his damn brain. He was eager, relentless even, pulling and sucking, another hand giving your other breast a similar treatment. He had you so focused that you let out a broken moan when slender fingers found their way into your panties.

"Fuckin' hell, Denki."

The bastard winked up at you, nipple still between his lips and before you could retort, he sent another small jolt through you.

You were blatantly grinding down on his hand, reaching behind you, you found him completely solid, barely being contained in the tight black boxers he wore. You had enough sense to tug them down and wrap your hand around him making his teeth sink into your soft flesh, whining when you stroked him.

"Y/N..." He whimpered, his hand momentarily distracted from his ministrations gave you enough time to shift in his lap to scoot forward putting his cock in front of you. In one swift motion, you had his length between your slick. "Oh fuck, cutie!" Golden eyes were squeezed shut while you moved along him, feeling that pleasant curve he had, you could only imagine what it was gonna be like to have him inside you.

"You're being a little tease, ma-makes me wanna do all sorts of things to y-you."

He was kissing your neck, your chest, shoulders, and arms, anywhere on you that he could reach. His hips bucking up into you, just trying to hit that perfect angle.

Strength and agility were something most overlooked when it came to Denki Kaminari but when the man wanted something bad enough, he found a way to get it.

He had your ass rising up in the air with a harsh thrust of his hips and a small squeak from you, giving him exactly enough time to scoot down on the sofa so you were sat atop his face. If you complained, he didn't hear you. Denki already had your thighs around his head and his tongue devouring you completely.

Little shockwaves rocked you while you cried out his name, hands fisting blonde locks just trying to stay upright.

One orgasm from you apparently wasn't enough, neither was two but on the third, Denki finally relented, allowing your heartrate to come back down and your gasping breaths to come in more steadily.

You slid back down his body, his erection now smack against your ass. His hair was recked, face completely flush but he had the biggest grin on his face that you'd ever seen.

Denki kissed both your cheeks, "You are so amazing, cutie!" Kissed your lips, "You taste better than anything I've ever had!" And one more on the tip of your nose. "Doin' okay?"

You nodded, starting to really gather yourself again, and by this point, you really just wanted one thing.

"I wanna... Denks... can I take care of you now?"

"Sure, cutie! How do you want me?" The wiggling eyebrows had you rolling your eyes and pushing him on his back again.

It took little effort for you to position yourself above his cock, and with how slick you were, his bright pink head slipped right inside. He held your hands while you scrunched up your face, sliding all the way down him until he was completely sheathed within.

The curve was immaculate. Hitting in just the right way that had you moaning with just a couple thrusts from him. Before long, you were eagerly bouncing on his cock. Riding him hard so he filled you up each and every time.

You barely registered him reaching for the coffee table, his phone now in his hands. "What're you doin'?" You practically slurred, slowing only slightly. He tapped the camera lens with a wicked grin. "Seriously?"

"We could make 'em really jealous now..."

Somewhere in your brain, you knew your date wouldn't give two shits, in fact, this probably would have only validated their thoughts about your's and Denki's relationship but with his cock stuffed so deeply into you, kissing your cervix in the most beautiful way, you really didn't give a damn.

You and Denki put on the best possible show you could think of. You were overstimulated, sore, and completely elated! He balanced the phone against the wine bottle so neither of you had to try to hold it.

This way he could play with your breasts or squeeze your thighs while you dug half-moons into his chest. Shocked with the playful zaps he sent right to your core.

Your makeup you'd didn't feel like taking off now ran down your cheeks with tears. Your hair was a mess thanks to him pulling at it.

Denki had you howling through another two orgasms, telling you how perfect you were, how nice you felt squeezing him so tightly, your nails felt so good against his skin.

It was only when you collapsed against his chest did he hoist your hips up so he could ram into you, pulling out just at the last second with a strangled cry of your name.

He wiggled himself free, grabbing a towel from your bathroom and cleaning you both up before stopping the recording.

"You're, hey you're gonna send that to me right?" You asked when he handed back your hoodie off the lamp.

He dropped a kiss on your lips, plopping down beside you on the sofa again and you noticed your email already up and the video uploading. "Obviously, we share all our videos and photos. Why would this be different?"

#mha #bnha #mha smut #denki kaminari #kaminari #kaminari smut #denki kaminari smut #mha fluff #denki fluff #denki smut #denki x you #mha x reader #kaminari x reader #denki x reader

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daughter-of-sapph0 · 3 years

Text

Your Second Death

you die twice. once when you take your last breath, and again when someone says your name for the last time. it may be hundreds, maybe even thousands of years into the future, but one day, all records will be erased or destroyed or forgotten, and there will be no memory of you.

there still might be evidence you exist. we found cave paintings from tens of thousands of years ago. we know humans exist and lived lives and made art and had fun. but we don't remember them because we don't know who they are. all we have left of them is some mud and clay on a wall. someone existed. someone with a name. but that name has been lost to time.

one day, that same thing will happen to you and me. in who knows how many years, your social media site will shut down its servers. if your lucky, a few of your more popular posts will end up being saved in screenshots and posted on other sites. one day, those other sites will shut down, and the only record of your tumblr account will be a couple screenshots and backups on random people's devices.

maybe one day, hundreds of years in the future, people will move on from using the internet and use another form of communication. maybe an entire record of the internet is kept safe in an interstellar library. maybe after humanity has traveled the stars, we would still have a record of what earth was like in the 20th and 21st centuries, the start of humanity's journey into the cosmos. maybe the copy of the internet, this relic of a nearly forgotten record, has your popular posts still on there. it will also have census records, addresses, texts, videos, photos, phone calls, likes, comments, all from billions of people who lived hundreds of years ago. hospital documents are stored on the internet. in this future, in this copy of the internet, in this interstellar library, where millions of humans (and possibly other species) visit daily, somewhere on that record is your birth certificate.

and also, your death certificate.

but you aren't dead yet. not fully, anyway. people can look you up. "John Smith. born 2002, died 2108." they can see you, your entire life, saved as a record for trillions to see. no, you're not dead. though your physical body may have long since decayed, hundreds of years after you left this mortal plane, you are still seen and remembered and known by more people now than people who even existed when you were alive.

but even the interstellar library cannot last forever. thousands of years have past. humanity has spread out so far that we have gone intergalactic. colonized planets are so far apart that it takes multiple generations just to send one back and forth message. information can only travel at light speed. unbeknownst to 99.999% of all of humanity, the star that the interstellar library was orbiting has just become a supernova. the entire library and everything in it has been swallowed by red firey plasma. maybe a few copies were made. maybe before the library was destroyed, a copy of all the information was sent to nearby systems. maybe humanity was smart enough to keep a backup of one of its greatest inventions. but that's a big "maybe". what if no one cares about historical preservation? what if over time the data became corrupted and unrecognizable? what if no one sent out copies? what if no one received those copies? or, most terrifying, what if no one was alive to receive the copies? all of the data would have been destroyed. forever.

it's hard to know where humanity will be in the future. the universe is terrifyingly inhospitable. almost everything out there wants to kill you. Earth just so happens to be one of the only places in all of infinity that we can actually survive. and even that is looking grim right now. who's to say humanity can even last for thousands of years? we could all die due to incompetence, a rogue AI, or an alien species that wipes us out without a second thought.

but let's assume the best. let's assume that humanity has survived up until this point, and that someone made a backup. maybe the record of the internet, the record of your life, can last a few thousand more years. maybe even a million years. at this point, the internet is as old to current humans as those cave paintings are to us. can these humans even read or understand our record of the internet? they know it exists, but maybe they don't know what it means. the same situation exists now. we know those cave paintings exist. we have extensive records of them. we can even estimate what they mean. they were an old form of record keeping. people would put their hand prints on a wall to show that they were there and who they were, maybe in the same way people millions of years from now will look at census data. those drawings of people hunting animals and ancient forms of writing, now untranslateable, would be similar to future humans looking at your tumblr posts. at this point, would you be dead? humanity knows you exist. but they don't know your name. it's impossible to translate.

no. I still have hope. we may be dead, but I doubt we'll be dead for long. with enough time and research, modern day scientists may be able to translate those cave paintings, and uncover the name of a young girl who lived millions of years ago. not a modern day name that we gave them, like Lucy. but the name she called herself. it may take years, but eventually we'll be able to say her name, and she'll be brought back from the dead. people will remember her again. maybe the same thing can happen for us millions of years in the future. humanity could create an AI that could translate the entirety of the internet into an understandable format. humanity would be able to say our names once again. we would be resurrected, brought back from the dead, and once again remembered by humanity.

now let's fast forward a bit. let's fast forward a lot. to the end of time. the heat death of the universe. no one is really sure how the universe will end. but the common theories are either that it keeps expanding so much that stars become invisible as they escape beyond the observable universe, or that all the stars will eventually use all their energy and fuse all their matter into iron, and the only light will be white dwarfs that will themselves fizzle out in a couple quadrillion years. either way, humanity will see the night sky go black. all light, heat, and energy will eventually disapate, and without energy, nothing can exist. one day, the last white dwarf will fizzle out. soon the solar panels of the last few space ships in the universe will lose their energy. maybe humanity is able to create nuclear energy by using the cold iron cores of dead suns. but that too will soon run out. as the last living creature slowly freezes to death, we will die along with them. maybe we have already died long ago. maybe people stopped caring about preserving the internet. maybe a disaster caused the record to be destroyed. but when that last creature dies, human or not, we all die along with it. as then, there will be absolutely no way to recover any of that data. no way to translate it. no way to receive the record being broadcasted out from a dying space library. no way to preserve the greatest record of human knowledge so far for future generations to see, because at that point, there won't be any future generations.

what do you think that last creature is thinking as it dies? does it think that it is truly the last one? would it have hope that life continues in another warmer part of the universe, a place now too far away to travel to even with light speed travel? does it think about the history of the universe, the big bang, the first life forming, humans and maybe other species exploring the vastness of space, and all of the events that lead up to its birth and now its death? was it awake to see it's comrades freeze to death? did it see the last nuclear reactor warn "low fuel" and then power down forever? was it even born long enough ago to see the last white dwarf fizzle out, or did multiple generations survive on these cold ships using iron cores as fuel?

this last living creature thinks to itself "to the entire history of the universe, all life in it, all the emotions that have been felt, all the journeys that have been made, all the records that have been kept, all the archives that have been lost, all the data that has been forgotten, and absolutely everything ever, this is for you". and now, it, us, everyone...

is... dead...

the universe is pitch black and the highest temperature anywhere is absolute zero. you can't see anything. but even if you could, it would be completely empty. all the atoms in the universe have stopped moving. the electrons have stopped orbiting their nuclei. the fundamental particles of the universe have stopped. all black holes and white dwarfs have fizzled out. all stars have long died, and their iron cores used as fuel to survive life a bit longer.

life could not exist here. and if you saw this place for the first time, you'd be forgiven for thinking life never had existed here. because there's nothing here. no record, no information, no archive, no data, nothing at all to indicate to anything that life used to exist here. but it did. this location is where Earth used to be. what happened to it? if it still existed, it would be trillions of light years away in the far off Milkdromeda galaxy (a collision of the Milky-Way and Andromeda galaxies). but now, neither Earth nor Milkdromeda exist. Earth has been mined for materials by an alien species to build their ships, unaware that the planet they used once harbored life, perhaps the birthplace of all life in the universe. it's Sun, as well as all the other stars in Milkdromeda have long since died, their iron cores used as fuel to keep the last living things alive. but now, nothing exists any more. the entire universe is empty.

suddenly, a flash of light! the universe expands rapidly. from the size of an atom to the size of a planet, star, solar system, in only a few seconds. at the speed of light, everything is expanding.

a new big bang has occurred!

a new universe is born!

Your Second Death by Nicole (DaughterOfSappho) 2022

thank you so much for reading. I wrote this poem while having a bit of an existential crisis, and I thought tumblr would like it. I don't mind if you share this on other sites. in fact I strongly encourage that. but please credit me. go ahead, make art or record readings of it if you want. you have my full permission. all I ask is that you have my name somewhere in the discription or a pinned comment where ever you post it. thank you so much :)

#dostxt #poetry #Your Second Death #nicki.art #my art #poems #poems on life #poems on death #poems on nature #poems on the universe #poems about life #poems about death #poems about nature #poems about the universe

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miekasa · 4 years

Text

more boyfriend headcanons: love languages

↯ pairing: eren jaeger x (fem) reader

↯ genres and warnings: modern au, college au to some extent, fluff

↯ notes: i cannot stop thinking about him, so have 50 more head canons about this absolute menace. despite the title, he can and will turn anything into a love language, so beware.

annoying the hell out of you (quality time)

You’ve heard of girls sitting on their boyfriend’s laps and hugging them/falling asleep while they play games, now get ready for: boyfriends hugging you from the back while you attempt to do any mundane activity bc they miss you.

Because that’s Eren. About almost anything, because his physical affection, when not in the presence of other people, is absolutely on ten thousand and one.

The only public place he doesn’t mind cuddling up to you is the library. He doesn’t mind putting his arm around you or leaning his head on your shoulder, or even doing the sitting hugging thing in the library. Mostly because few people are there anyway.

Mind you, you’re the one who even showed him where the library was, and now he doesn’t know how to act. “Eren it’s not a ‘cuddling spot.’ It’s the library where I—and lots of other people, including yourself—go to do homework.” “If not cuddling spot, then why library chairs and study rooms cuddly?”

Particularly when it’s getting late and you’ve been crammed in the library for hours, and Eren just wants you to pack it up so he can drive you home. He’ll squeeze himself between your body and the back of your chair, wrap his arms around your stomach, and lay his cheek on your back.

Most times he falls asleep waiting for you to be finished. Sometimes he gets impatient and tickles you until you agree to leave. Either works for him.

He doesn’t not like holding hands in public, but it’s not his go to either. If you’re walking together, sometimes he’ll wrap his arm around your shoulder—usually after some cocky comment—or even walk behind you with his hands on your shoulders like it’s a two person conga line.

He doesn’t kiss you in public a lot, and never around his friends. They can see the literal hearts in his eyes when he’s around you though, so it’s not like he has to. On occasion, he will kiss your cheek. It’s kind of random, but you don’t question it.

In all honestly, whenever he gets affectionate or cuddly in public is all pretty random, even to him. Sometimes he’ll just be standing around you and he’s hit with the urge to engulf you in a hug and kiss your cheeks and he has to stop himself like, “....Why did I just think about doing that?”

Partially because he wasn’t outwardly hugged or shown affection a lot as a child, so sometimes he gets to urges children do to just want a hug. But he’s also pretty bad and/or new at processing his emotions like that so he mostly stands there like 🧍 looking at you with lovey dovey eyes instead.

Touchy when he’s drunk. But that’s not exclusive to you; anyone in a five foot radius of him will be subject to his arm slung around their shoulders, or him being slumped over their back, or random head ruffles.

Most commonly Armin, but I think we all knew that. Sometimes it’s Jean, and Jean is an even messier drunk, which results in the both of them actually being overly affectionate with each other in a strange, but endearing way. They both deny it to their graves when they’re sober, though.

Hovers around you. Constantly. Like a shadow.

Does not leave you the hell alone when you’re in the kitchen. Will make it 100x more difficult for you to cook or just maneuver, which is ironic seeing as the most gourmet thing he can cook up is bagel with cream cheese.

Sometimes Eren seems unaware of his size in comparison to you and your friends. It’s very sweet that he laughs with his whole body, but he’s got to realize that if bumps into you because of his sporadic laughter, that he might accidentally knock you into next Tuesday.

Likes when you touch his hair, doesn’t matter where or when, or who’s around. He loves it, all of it.

Will press his face against yours if he has stubble, just to be annoying. Like always.

If you hadn’t gotten it from everything else, he just likes to annoy you in general. But, like, affectionately. I keep saying it’s his love language and I mean it. Really—what it is is that he likes spending time with you, but he also likes annoying the hell out of you, too.

Bites. Not in a sexy way—well, unless you want him too—but, just because. Bites your shoulder when you’re not expecting it, bites your cheek while you’re in the middle of watching a show. Sometimes he takes your hand in his and your think it’s going to be sweet and he’s going to kiss it, but really he just brings it to his mouth to bite it.

Bites your ass, too. Again, just for fun. Because he thinks he can get away with it. Biting is a love language I’m telling y’all.

Likes to give you piggy back rides, even if you don’t ask for them or need one. You could be going from your room to the living room and Eren insists on carrying you there.

And for some reason, he thinks that because he likes to hold/lift you, that that should apply to you as well?? Like he’s not 6′1 and big bodied, hello?? Eren you cannot just jump on top of people, you’re grown.

He lets you dress him a lot. His fashion sense isn’t bad, and to be honest with you, I think he’d be a little bit of a hypebeast LOL. I don’t mean decked out head to toe in Supreme (god forbid...) but definitely has a bit of a sneaker obsession.

Not that he keeps them clean or is obsessive about creasing them he couldn’t care less. He just thinks they’re cool. Maybe even some accessories too, like those KAWS toys. Not a lot because they’re hard to get, but is really proud of his little growing collection.

But if you want to dress him up, he’s down for it. Would even let you buy him a pea coat so he can pretend to be a scholar. (He’s not BYE). He’ll tell you if something really isn’t his style, but he’ll wear it if you tell him he looks hot 🙄

Kinda forces his way into your life in little ways. Like, he’ll start adding his favorite snacks to your grocery lists. Moves a pair of your shoes from the door to make room for his own when he’s over. Basically claims two drawers for himself in your dresser. Annoying. Endearing.

Lowkey has his own intricate skincare routine, but he likes doing it with you more. He’ll make it a whole thing, and buy wine, and stupid drinking card games, and sit with you on your bed for 2 hours playing while your face masks dry.

Texts you if you’re in the same room as him, but not paying attention to him. Especially if you’re doing schoolwork.

Throws pillows at you while you’re sitting at your desk to get your attention. He could just say your name, but it’s so much more fun this way (according to him anyway). It’s all fun and games until you smother him with one.

Thinks arguing with you is cute, and sometimes says or does—or doesn’t do, for that matter—things just to incite an argument. Not a big one, or something serious, just petty things to rile you up so he can kiss and make up for it. For example, he’ll purposely putting the dishes in the wrong place, or hiding the remote from you, or putting his clothes in the wrong hamper.

“Eren, I swear to god, if you don’t stop putting the water bottles on the top shelf—” “What are you gonna do it about, pretty girl? Hit me with it? You can’t even reach—ow!”

being your loudest hype man (words of affirmation)

The amount of pictures he has of you... criminal. From off-guards, to posed photos, to selfies, to screenshots, he has them all tucked away in a little folder with your name and a string of very inappropriate emojis after it.

Screenshots 90% of your snaps to him, even if his just of your eyebrows up. Sometimes because he thinks it’s funny, sometimes to save the picture because he likes it, but mostly because he knows you don’t understand WHY and that’s gives him the most satisfaction 😌

Loud and annoying in your comments on social media too. Hype man almost to a cringe fail level. He doesn’t care though, he has to let it be known.

You could post a simple picture of you and Mikasa at lunch and Eren is in the comments screaming as per usual. @jaegerbomb: do i see TWO pretty best friends??? fuck it up besties 😫🥵🥵😜

GOD. HE WOULD RESPOND WITH “SO TRUE, BESTIE” TO ANYTHING ONCE HE LEARNS WHAT IT MEANS.

Oh, but he doesn’t take to it lightly when you call him bestie, or refer to him as your friend in any capacity. He’s your boyfriend, and would like to be labeled as such.

If you did that prank where you pick up the phone while you’re around him and say “Oh, I’m not too busy, I’m hanging with a friend right now,” he would pout about it for days. Days. Doesn’t get over it, and reminds you of your transgressions every two to three business weeks.

Tells you you look hot all the time, regardless of what you’re doing or wearing. He means it, too, genuinely, he thinks you’re hot. But he does get a kick out of how potentially embarrassed it makes you.

Tells you you’re smart and beautiful and his favorite person on the planet. He means it, always, even if the delivery isn’t romantic. Although, he would argue that telling you he would “tap that” is very romantic.

for him: receiving gifts & words of affirmation

Eren would be really humbled and honored to receive a gift from you. He needs to receive physical affection, too—but something about you thinking about him enough to buy or make him a gift that he’ll love and cherish really hits home for him. He doesn’t have many people who would do that for him.

If you buy him anything, he’s using it the second it’s out of the wrapping paper. You buy him shoes? He’s wearing them the next day. A new case for his phone? Rips the old one off in an instant. A little trinket for his keychain? He can barely remember to carry his keys in the first place, but suddenly he can’t ever forget them now.

He just can’t get over the fact that you think about him and know him well enough to tailor your purchases to his liking. It’s almost an impossible concept to him, and really reassuring that you love him as much as he loves you.

On a similar note, he actually doesn’t mind couple items, as long as they’re not obvious and/or corny. Down to have a pair of matching hats or phone cases or even sneakers. You don’t even have to always/only wear them at the same time, just knowing you have the same thing at home kinda makes him feel fuzzy inside.

He also thinks it’s hot. He can’t explain why knowing his girl has the same kicks at him is hot, he just knows it is.

As much as he likes telling you how hot you are, Eren also likes to hear that you find him attractive—and that you like him, in general. For the most part, he gets that from your physical reciprocity and quite literally letting him hover around you like a fly, but it’s nice to be told with words every once in a while.

For as much as he knows it, he gets a little caught of guard whenever you tell him you love him. He knows you love him, but hearing it sometimes is a little surreal to him. Very reassuring, too, and everyone needs a little reassurance from time to time.

#aot x reader #snk x reader #eren x reader #eren jaeger x reader #eren yeager x reader #aot imagines #snk imagines #eren smut #eren fluff #levi x reader

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bestiesenpai · 4 years

Text

youtuber Sukuna

I beg you to read the shitposts I made about this, they are delicious. You don’t have to of course but...if you loved me you would :) s/n = screen name, and I hope you chuckle at Sukunas screen name

Content warning: uhmhm lowkey incel shit(mean internet comments and whatnot)

part two --- part 3

Name: Sukuna. Age: 25. Height: 6 foot 5 inches. Occupation: toxic Youtuber, fitness trainer and hot guy.

Sukuna wasn’t exactly known for being kind. He wasn’t nice to others, rarely having anything good to say about anyone, and he’d made a successful Youtube career out of it. First starting as a fitness trainer at his gym, through encouragement from his clients and the notion of a quick cash grab, he started Youtube.

He didn’t care about it and that reflected in the quality of his videos and editing. He didn’t have consistent uploads, just filming and posting videos whenever he wanted, analytics be fucked. But somehow, that worked out for him, and he quickly found himself with over two million subscribers just frothing at the mouth for his next video.

And those subscribers were some of the worst people. Sukuna didn’t care about fostering a safe space online for others, not in the slightest. His comment sections were atrocious, both on his Youtube and his Instagram. It was full of toxic men one-upping each other constantly and dragging on each other for not being able to work out as much as Sukuna did.

Sukuna was a large part of why his fanbase were so toxic. He himself often made bad comments about others, whether fellow creators or people that happened to appear in the backgrounds of his videos, and on more than one occasion he’d been ‘cancelled’. None of that mattered though, all he cared about was shitting on other people and making money.

Sometimes he played video games and posted it, but not too often. Sukuna often stated he wasn’t so much of a fucking lonely loser that he’d play video games all the time, and so the gaming videos he did post were few and far between. He played angry shooter games and GTA, mindless button clicking he could get lost in for a few hours for a video.

Laying in bed one night after uploading his most recent video, one where he rages at 12 year olds on GTA online, Sukuna was just scrolling through his phone mindlessly. After he uploads video game content, like clockwork, he gets recommendations for gaming channels. He only watches a few of them, mostly leaving mean comments saying what losers they are, but one catches his eye.

He’s never been recommended this kind of video before. The thumbnail is light and bright with some pink aesthetic lights in the back. But the most enticing thing is the person in the middle, cute pink cat ear headphones on and a bright smile.

“Let’s see…” Sukuna mumbles to himself, mindlessly clicking the video. He hasn’t even read the title, he only clicked it because they were cute, and here he is nearly blinded by the bright setup they have.

“Hi everyone, it’s (Y/N) here and I’m really excited today! We’re going to be playing this new game I found!” Sukuna is immediately enraptured by the sound of your voice, watching how your face changes as you talk. His eyes drift off to the decor behind you, cute plushies and healthy plants, and some twinkling fairy lights. There’s books as well, and your chair is one of those ergonomic gamer chairs he has as well but in pink.

Sukuna watches the video dumbly, totally in the dark about whatever you’re doing, but loving it all the same. All he knows is that he likes the sound of your voice, and when you laugh and smile at a funny part in the game, it makes a light flush come to his cheeks.

It only takes one video for Sukuna to spiral into more of your content. He watches a video on your gaming setup, and he’s surprised that so much technology can come in pink. He watches a video on how you edit, a few of you cooking in your kitchen, and even a few vlog videos.

He quickly subscribes to your channel, and when you plug your social media, he immediately goes there. Pulling up your Instagram, he stares at your profile picture and almost audibly coos at you for being cute.

Your profile is just as cute as your videos are and Sukuna barely remembers to follow you before he’s going through your whole feed, liking every picture he sees. Sometimes he leaves comments, only one word though, ‘cute’. He’s never liked something so outright cute before, it wasn’t who he was and it definitely didn’t fit with his brand.

Falling asleep after following you on every platform, Sukuna wakes up thinking about you as well. And he also wakes up to hundreds of comments from all his accounts, bombarding him with questions and screenshots from last night.

‘SUKUNA WHY WOULD YOU LIKE THIS SHIT?!’

‘OMG Sukuna liked (Y/N)s posts!!’

‘Sukuna is so gross and toxic, you better stay away from (Y/N)!’

‘SUKUNA YOU GAY NOW’

‘EW why the fuck do you like this bitch?’

There were hundreds of comments that he waded through. Most were from his fans, expressing disgust at how many photos of yours he’d liked and wondering why he, Sukuna, most heterosexual alpha male on the planet, would like a pretty in pink Youtuber who had bubbly intros and whined when their animal crossing villagers wanted to move away.

Other comments were from your fans, some in awe that he would like you considering how much he said he hated overly cute things. Other fans expressed concern, worried what this might mean for their favorite Youtuber. Did Sukuna want to cause problems, potentially hurting you? He did have a reputation of bullying others, so this wasn’t far fetched.

Checking your Instagram, you didn’t make any comment about it. There wasn’t any update or anything, but on his end he was being tagged in endless Twitter threads with screenshots of him liking your posts and commenting under them.

“For fucks sake.” He grunted, clenching his phone in his hands. The amount of notifications he was getting were starting to upset him and he nearly threw his phone to get them to stop.

Ignoring his phone for the rest of the day, Sukuna went to the gym like he always did and trained with his clients. Some of them brought it up to him, asking him if he had a mind break last night and forgot what he was doing. Sending them harsh glares, Sukuna refused to talk about it.

“Oh my fucking god.” Sukuna nearly wailed when he got home, finally checking his phone. His name and yours had begun trending, and the hashtag #protect(Y/N) was also. Muttering angrily under his breath, Sukuna turned on Instagram live.

“Okay what the fuck!” He shouted, seeing the live become instantly flooded with people all screaming about you and him. “You’re all fucking annoying, you know that?” Glaring harshly at the camera, he read some of the comments that went by.

‘WHY’D YOU LIKE (Y/N)S POSTS FROM 2017’

‘Are you two secretly dating??’

‘COLLAB!’

“Who gives a shit why I liked their stuff, you’re a fucking weirdo for keeping track of me. And we aren’t secretly dating, dipshits.” Rolling his eyes, Sukuna scoffed as more comments came in begging for a collaboration. “And think about it you morons, why would we collab? Our shit is too fucking different, what would we even film about?”

Sukuna stayed on Instagram live for nearly an hour answering questions asking about you. Every time he had to answer that you weren’t secretly dating, he got a little more annoyed. Not at the comments themselves but at the fact that it was true; you didn’t even know he existed.

Ending the live in a huff, Sukuna didn’t feel any better than before, and it was made even worse by the fact that everything he said was being relayed to Twitter, and you were tagged in every tweet.

“These idiots!” Staring at his phone, Sukuna couldn’t believe what he was seeing. On your Instagram stories, you’d posted a q&a for your followers, and nearly all of the comments were about Sukuna.

“Hi everyone! No, me and Sukuna aren’t dating!” You said, laughing a little to ease how uncomfortable you were. “To be honest, I’ve never even heard of him before! As you know, my content is very...different from his, so our circles don’t exactly intersect. But I’m always happy to have new followers and potential friends!”

“Fuck me.” Sukuna groaned, cringing at how uncomfortable you looked having to address the sudden onslaught of questions. For once he wished he’d actually given a shit about his online presence, so that maybe one day your circles could intersect. He knew he scared you, he scared a lot of people, and this was just proof.

“Uh, Sukuna if you see this, hi it’s nice to meet you!” You said in the next slide, puffing out your cheeks and waving cutely at the camera. It made Sukuna blush, and he hated it. “Thank you for following me and liking my content! I was very surprised that you found me!”

“Of course I did, idiot, you’re fucking cute.” He muttered under his breath.

“I know a lot of people are asking for us to do a video together and I know our content is really different, so don’t feel pressured to respond or anything, but the offer is open! If you’d like, we can collab on something.”

“On what?” He asked like you were there.

“I cook sometimes, and I know you cook too! Maybe we can make a cooking video? You can teach me how to make healthy food or something!” Sukuna could tell a fake laugh when he heard one, and you definitely had one right now. “Anyways, thank you! Bye Sukuna!” But hearing you say his name cutely like that made him not care.

He nearly responded right away, accepting the collab offer now that you’d spoken about it, but he didn’t want to seem desperate. He watched through the rest of your Instagram stories, going back and replaying the parts where you talked about him over and over and his heart clenched every time when you said his name.

In the dead of night, Sukuna DM’s you after watching your latest video and leaving the simple comment ‘check your DM’s’.

“Fuck, what should I say?” He’s suddenly stumped as he looks at the keyboard. Typing and retyping a message, in the end all he can say is hi. He doesn’t expect a reply, ever, but when he gets a vibration on his phone two seconds later he jumps to read it.

(S/N): hi Sukuna! :)

(cursedgod): hey

Real fucking smart, repeating what he just said.

(S/N): is there something you wanted to talk to me about?

(S/N): I hope you haven’t been annoyed at all the notifications you’ve been getting!

(cursedgod): No it’s okay

(cursedgod): we can collab if you want

Good Sukuna, good. Play it cool, don’t let them know that your fingers are actually trembling because you’re nervous.

(S/N): do you want to?? I don’t want to pressure you! I know we’re pretty different haha

(cursedgod): yeah, let's do it. Cooking?

(S/N): sure!

Looking around his home, he was suddenly assaulted with the fact that he didn’t have any furniture. He barely had a proper bedroom, just a mattress on a bare frame and a dresser. His lounge room was the same with his computer setup in one corner and then nothing else. There was only a couch, a mounted TV and a fold out table and chairs for his dining room.

(cursedgod): I know a studio kitchen we can use, I’ll send you the address

Thank god he’d done promo work for a brand in a studio one day, otherwise he’d be fucked.

(S/N): awesome! I’m free next Saturday!

And just like that, it was a date. Well, a meeting. Sukuna knew it wasn’t a date, but his heart still thumped like it was one. Confirming the time, he ended the conversation with a curt goodbye and obsessed about it throughout the night.

When the day to meet you came, Sukuna nearly ran late trying to pick out his clothes. He’d never cared about looking good or presenting himself well in front of others, whatever version of him he turned up in was what they got. But for you, he wanted to try a little harder.

Waiting outside the studio space, Sukuna rubbed his hands together nervously. You’d messaged a day or two ago offering to put the video on your channel since it probably wouldn’t fit his aesthetic, so he didn’t have to bring his shitty camera equipment.

“S-sukuna?” Snapping his head up, Sukunas mouth fell open looking at your curious face a few feet away, an Uber driving off behind you. You were even cuter in person, just his fucking luck. How was he expected to act like a normal person when his recent obsession was here looking better than he could have imagined.

“Hi.” What comes out is a grunt, not the smooth word he’d hoped. He can see you eyeing him up, taking in all the thick and corded muscles of his body. It made his chest puff out a little, he worked hard for this physique and to have you so openly looking at him made him happy.

“It’s nice to meet you!” Sticking your hand out, you smiled politely at him.

“Same.” Shaking your hand with a firm grip, Sukuna could feel the difference in your palms. Yours was soft and nicely moisturized and he had callouses everywhere and a few cuts and scrapes.

Opening the door for you, Sukuna led you to the studio space he’d rented out. It was a clean and modern kitchen, not unlike his own, but it had appliances and looked actually lived in. Helping you set up a few camera angles, Sukuna felt a pang of nerves hit him in the stomach.

“Sukuna, can we take a picture together?” You asked before starting, and Sukunas brow furrowed deeply. Why would you want to take a picture with him? His expression must have scared you, because you quickly backtracked. “F-for promo for this video, on Instagram and stuff!”

“Sure.” God, did he feel bad or what. He shouldn’t have made that face at you, now you wouldn’t look him in the eye. Crouching down to get the right angle for you, Sukuna watched you pick a cute animal filter.

“Just do what I do.” Throwing up a peace sign, you cutely tilted your head from side to side and smiled. Sukuna tried to do the same but he looked awkward, and most of all he was blushing pretty bad.

You snapped a multitude of pictures, some at different angles and some with different filters, and in all of them Sukuna was blushing at least a little. He managed to smile more as it went on, even laughing at one of the filters.

“Thanks! I’m going to post these really quick and then we can get started!” Giving him a brief smile, you turned back to your phone and set about editing some of the pictures. Looking over your shoulder, Sukuna could see that he looked like a blushing high schooler meeting their idol for the first time and not a grown man.

Once the photos were posted and you tagged him in everything, it was time to start. Setting up your marks on the floor, you took a generous drink of water and cleared your throat.

“Are you ready for the intro? I’ll start it and introduce you, okay?” You’d actually prepared a script for yourself, and showed Sukuna as well.

“Okay.” Stepping in front of the camera, Sukuna bristled at feeling you so close to him. Your arm brushed his casually as you were fixing your shirt, and Sukuna was glad he’d worn his most expensive cologne for this.

“Hi everyone, welcome to today's video! As you know, I’m (Y/N), and today we have a special guest today!” Throwing your arms in the air, you motioned to Sukuna.

“Hi.” He nodded, barely cracking a smile. He could feel you looking at him like you wanted to say something, but he didn’t look.

“So, many people have been asking for us to do a collaboration and it’s finally here!” Clapping your hands lightly, you rocked on your heels and nudged his shoulder with yours. “Do you want to tell them what we’ll be doing today?”

“Uh-” The playful nudge you’d given him was enough to make Sukuna short circuit. “I-I-” He suddenly couldn’t remember how to speak. “Rice?”

“Let’s try that again.” You laughed. “Do you want to tell them what we’ll be doing today?” This time, you didn’t nudge him with your shoulder.

“We’re gonna…” the words were on the tip of his tongue, they wanted to come out and be spoken but he couldn’t do it.

“It’s okay, it’s okay!” Nodding reassuringly, you took a deep breath in and out, and Sukuna shakily copied. “One more try?” When he looked at you, Sukuna expected to see a hint of annoyance in your face, but there was none. You were just smiling softly at him, waiting for his answer.

“Yeah. I’ll uh, I’ll get it next time.” Stepping away from the camera, Sukuna took a drink of water and cleared his throat. Cracking the bones in his neck, he took a deep breath and came back. “Let’s do it.” No more fucking embarrassments.

“Do you want to tell them what we’ll be doing today?” You asked for the third time, slightly swaying your body side to side this time.

“We’re gonna make katsudon today.” Finally, the words he wanted to say came out.

“That’s right! As you can see, Sukuna is really fit!” You immediately hopped in, giving his arm a brief squeeze. “And he knows how to make a ton of healthy meals!”

“Mhmm.”

“So I asked if he could help teach me, and all of you at home, how to make it!” Smiling at the camera, you waited a few seconds before relaxing and turning it off. “Did you like that? We can refilm it if you want.”

“No, it’s okay.” Running a hand through his hair, he pointed to the bag of rice he’d brought. “Let’s get started on this shit.”

Taking fifteen minutes to film the two of you filling up the rice cooker, when it was over, you set about getting aesthetic shots of the other ingredients. Sukuna tried to seem casual off to the side on his phone, but he was really watching you.

Getting started on chopping the ingredients, Sukuna somehow managed to say the things he was supposed to without stuttering too badly. He was amazed that you could make the things he was doing sound so interesting, your narration as you held the camera and tried to do things yourself was impressive to the man that barely knew anything about cameras.

“Sukuna, I need help cutting the meat.” You whined, tapping the meat on the cutting board with a knife. “I don’t remember how you showed me.”

“Here.” Without thinking, Sukuan grabbed your hand with the knife in it and moved it for you. “You just have to move your wrist more, it’s not that hard.” Doing it a few times, when Sukuna felt your chest expand with air against his, that’s when he realized how close the two of you were. “S-sorry.” Immediately jumping back, he stared at the floor.

“Thanks!” Giving him a smile, you kept at it.

“I’ll fry the meat.” Stepping in as soon as you were done, Sukuna already had the hot oil ready. He was eager to cook and do something with his hands instead of - what he felt like - was awkwardly watching you off to the side.

“Okay!” Grabbing the camera, you focused on the pan. “You’re really good at this, Sukuna!”

“T-thanks.” Staring directly at the pan, Sukuna didn’t look away. Even with the hot oil popping up from the pan a few times and burning his fingers, he didn’t flinch at all.

“Ow!” But you did. Your hand had gotten too close, and when Sukuna flipped the meat, some of the oil had gotten on your hand.

“Shit.” Abandoning the pan, Sukuna was ready to drag you over to the sink for some cool water.

“I-it’s okay, it was only a little.” Shaking your stinging hand, you point to the food. “But I think the meat might burn.”

“Shit!”

Narrowly avoiding disaster with the meat, when it came time to cook the eggs, you made a joke about how you liked your eggs in the morning and Sukuna burnt them almost immediately. While not an overtly sexual comment, the implications of the words still affected him.

Somehow, he managed to make the dish come together and while his plated dish didn’t come out the best, yours looked at least halfway decent with overcooked meat and burnt eggs. The only things not messed up were the rice and vegetables, and even then Sukuna was surprised.

“We did it everyone, we made katsudon!” Holding up the bowls, you smiled big and nudged Sukunas shoulder again. “You saw we had a few mishaps along the way, but that’s okay, that’s what made it fun.”

“Yeah, it was fun.” Sukuna chuckled. Despite him being more nervous than he’d ever thought possible, he had fun cooking alongside you.

“Sukuna, will you try mine? I made it super pretty and everything.” Holding your dish up to him, Sukuna wasn’t expecting you to do that. Now he felt bad that his looked so ugly and like a teenaged boy made it; he almost said no.

Eating yours though, somehow it tasted better than he was expecting. It must have been how you prepared it, and the fact that you cared so much about the presentation. Eating it in silence, he let you eat in peace as well for a few minutes and compliment the food to the camera.

“Alright, that’s the end of the video!” Putting your bowl down, you turned to Sukuna. “I had so much fun today, thanks for filming this with me.” Now was his chance to make everything better. Putting his bowl down and bolstering himself with confidence, Sukuna threw his arm over your shoulder and pulled you close to him.

“Thank you (Y/N), I really did enjoy today. I hope we can film again soon!” He squeezed your shoulder and smiled really big at not only you but the camera as well. He knew he was blushing, he knew that even the tip of his nose was a nice rosy shade, but he didn’t care. If people teased him for it, then so be it. But he wanted you to know how he truly felt.

“R-really? You want to?” You asked, looking up at Sukuna from your place smooshed against his body.

“Really.”

“Aww, well you heard it here first everyone! Sukuna wants to shoot another video with me!” Clapping your hands a few times, you waved at the camera. “Okay, bye everyone!”

“Bye.” Sukuna waved too, waiting a few seconds before letting you go and turning off the camera.

“Sukuna, did you really mean it? You want to film another video with me?” You were in utter disbelief. All this time, he’d just seemed very standoffish, if not a little awkward around you. You were happy to film this video with him, he had way more followers than you and it would help boost both your channels, and to hear him say that just made it even better.

“Yeah, I was serious.” Sukuna spoke around stuffing his mouth with the food he still had left. He was more hungry than he thought, the nerves doing a good job of twisting his stomach during the video. Now that it’s over, he can finally relax.

“That makes me really happy.” Eating the rest of your food as well, you leant against the counter. “This is gonna sound kind of mean, but I was really scared to film with you today. I thought you were going to be really mean.”

“Shit, you did?” He grimaced, letting out a sigh. “Sorry I had you worried.” He could already imagine the comments you would get from his fans.

“It’s okay! You’re actually way nicer in person, I was surprised!”

“That’s good.”

“And you’re really buff, you have muscles in places I didn’t even know were possible!” You laughed bashfully at that comment, and avoided looking at him when he stared at you in shock. “I couldn’t help but notice…”

Were you checking him out? Had you been checking him out this whole time and he didn’t even realize? He had seen you eyeing him up when you first met, but were you looking at him like that at other times as well? Now he’d really have to watch your video to see if it was true.

“Thanks, it’s my job.” Could he have said that any lamer? “My job outside of all this, I mean. I’m a trainer at this fancy gym downtown.”

“Oh, I’ve seen some of your videos at your gym! I know which one you’re talking about.”

“You do? You’ve seen my videos?” If he wasn’t surprised before, he was now.

“Yeah, you know I had to do a little research beforehand.” You nodded, beginning to clean up the dishes around you. “And I know you’ve already watched almost all of my videos, so it only seemed fair.”

Did you have to bring that up? Now Sukuna was embarrassed again.

“Y-yeah, I did.” Clearing his throat, Sukuna helped gather the dishes. He took up washing them, another task he could do to get his mind off you. As you took down the camera equipment, he nearly broke several dishes and utensils from scrubbing too hard.

“I’ll call you an Uber.” He said when all was said and done and you were back at the front of the building.

“You don’t have to, it’s okay.”

“No, I want to.” Quickly calling you a ride, Sukuna fiddled with his phone a little more. “Uh, could I- could I-” His voice kept leaving him, and he had to cough a few times. “Can I get your number? I really liked your camera shit and I want to improve mine.” Okay, it wasn’t a total lie. He did like your setup and wanted to make his just as good, but he really wanted your number to potentially talk to you more about things outside of Youtube.

“Sure! Go ahead and type it in.” You were quick to give him your phone, a cute pink phone case on the back of it. Typing it in, he can’t help but notice the little devil emoji you add by his name. He wants to ask, but your ride is already pulling up.

“Bye!” Setting all your camera gear inside the car, you turn and wave goodbye.

“See ya.” Just as you’re about to close the car door, Sukuna gets a burst of confidence. “Text me when you get home, okay?”

“Okay!” And off you go. Sukuna watches the car drive off until he can’t see it anymore. He takes his time getting to his own place, eagerly awaiting your message with every step. But even when you do message him, all he can do is send a thumbs up back and nothing else.

It’s about two and a half days after that that you text him again, letting him know you’re done editing and that you’re going to post the video soon. It wasn’t a very long video to begin with, so the editing was simple enough. Sukuna replied with what appeared to be a lackluster ‘can’t wait’, but on the inside he was shaking. He’d already screenshot all the pictures the two of you took together and added them to a folder.

“Here we go.” As soon as the video went live, Sukuna watched it. He was mortified as soon as it started at the blush so evident on his cheeks, and how it stayed throughout the whole thing. He groaned at the part where he helped you cut up the meat, he almost wishes you’d cut it out. Every little detail that made him embarrassed was there, every little nuance of his actions you’d managed to capture and make it cute.

(Y/N): How do you like it??

You texted him after twenty minutes, eager to hear his thoughts.

(Sukuna): it’s good, good editing and stuff

(Y/N): yay! I’m going to read comments in a few hours, you should too! I bet people will be really shocked!

(Sukuna): yeah no doubt

Oh, he was definitely going to read the comments. Whereas you were going to wait for a fair few to come in before commenting, Sukuna frequently refreshed the page and read the new ones as they came in. You were right, a lot of people were surprised, but he also saw a lot of his fans as well.

‘Ew Sukuna really cooked for that bitch? They can’t do it themselves?’

‘Yeah, why do they have to rely on him? Useless as fuck lol’

‘Sukuna only did this to get laid, (Y/N) looks like an easy fuck’

All of those comments, and many more, made his blood boil. Usually, he wouldn’t care at all about the comments, letting them fester in his comment section and spiral out of control. But for you, it was different.

‘Fuck off and die you pieces of shit. Leave (Y/N) alone or say it to my fucking face’

Sukuna sent that message, along with a variety of other threats, to all the people that insulted you. He didn’t care that this wasn’t his channel and that you would deal with it in whatever way you wanted to. He needed to defend you against the unwanted audience he’d brought you.

Luckily, after seeing Sukunas messages, all of his fans backed off. They knew how serious he was about his threats and there were many rumors that he actually did go and beat people up who said things he didn’t like. No one wanted to be on the receiving end of his torment.

With Sukunas name attached to the video and his heavy presence in the comment section, the video easily went viral. It was easily the most viewed video on your channel, getting on the trending pages of several different platforms.

(Sukuna): hey

It’s nearly a week after the first video that Sukuna messages you, and the hype is still going strong, and your follower count grows greatly from it.

(Y/N): hi! What’s up?

(Sukuna): do you want to film a video for my channel now? We can play a game, I have a few

(Y/N): sure that sounds fun!

Oh how wrong you were. The game Sukuna chose was a scary game, a shooter game with scary zombies and a lot of possible jumpscares. He doesn’t tell you either, so on the night of filming - he insisted on it being nighttime to get the full scary effect - you were caught off guard.

“I don’t know about this.” You whined once you saw the title. The two of you were video calling alongside playing the game together, and Sukuna’s eyes flicked to your figure on the screen.

“It’ll be okay, I’ll carry you, don’t worry.” He had started filming as soon as he’d set up the game, and you were filming yourself as well for him.

“You promise it won’t be too scary?”

“If it’s too scary just close your eyes and I’ll protect you.” Smiling softly at you, he started up the game. The beginning was fine, just a quick introduction to the game, but as soon as things started to get moving, you were scared.

“Sukuna a zombie is eating me!” You screamed, frantically pushing buttons in an attempt to get it off.

“It’s okay!” He quickly got rid of it, and made sure to stay close to your character as the story progressed.

“(Y/N) stay by me, there’s about to be a whole lot of them.”

“Close your eyes there’s about to be a jump scare here.”

“Don’t worry about getting that item, I’ll grab it for you!”

Sukuna nearly forgot he was being filmed, saying sweet things to you to help encourage you and make sure you weren’t overwhelmed. There were many parts where you screamed in fright and Sukuna was there to coo at you and tell you it was okay. He made sure that your character never died, making sure to keep you close until the end of the game.

“Sukuna, that was so hard!” Squishing your cheeks in your hands, you looked at him through your phone.

“It was fun though, wasn’t it? I had fun with you.” Completely abandoning the game, he stared down at his phone with a soft smile on his face.

“Yeah, when there weren’t so many zombies.” You stuck your tongue out at him, and it made him laugh. Leaning his head into his hand, Sukuna grinned when you yawned.

“Aw, are you tired? Better go to sleep soon.” His voice dropped to a lower volume, like you were right next to him.

“I will.” You yawned again and it made Sukuna yawn as well.

“Get off the phone and go to bed, you’re making me tired too.”

“Fine.” Whining out the word, you waved sleepily. “Goodnight Sukuna, I’ll send you the video files in the morning, okay?”

“Night.” Waving back, Sukuna waited until you hung up to turn his stuff off as well.

In the morning, Sukuna was ready to edit. What usually took him a week to edit out of laziness, he took only a day to edit this video with you together. Rewatching the footage, he nearly gagged at seeing how soft his face got when he looked at you, and most of those parts were left in because he couldn’t stand to watch them and fix them.

(Sukuna): videos up

The next day, he messaged you. Once again Sukuna patrolled the comments, swiftly deleting any that said even a hint of a bad thing about you. There was less this time, what with Sukuna adding a warning at the beginning of the video threatening anyone that talked down at you.

This video, like the first, went viral. But for a much different reason. Since Sukuna was emotionally unable to deal with how sappy he was and edit those parts out, everyone got to see how soft he was for you. If the comments weren’t mean, they were screaming about how you and Sukuna must be dating now, because why else would he look at you and talk to you like that?

And much to Sukuna’s dismay, there were also fancam edits of you two together. Any clippable moment of him being sweet on you in the videos you’d made together along with the photos you’d posted on Instagram were edited together and posted on Twitter. You both were tagged in every single one, making sure Sukuna saw all the videos of you and him together. He saved all of them too, delighting in the way you looked with him with all those pretty filters.

By the end of the day, people were trying to put a ship name together for the two of you and he’s seen you repost a few fancams with cute messages of thanks as well. Seeing you receptive to the fans screaming about the two of you made him happy, even if he was still too nervous to text you about anything outside of Youtube.

As more comments came in, people on Twitter were begging him to do a vlog with you. You had quite a few on your channel, going to cafes or filming what your day or week was like. Sukuna had watched them all and was jealous of every single person that appeared alongside you.

(Y/N): hey I’m doing a live on Instagram if you want to join me! I know people really like us together lol it’ll be great for views

(Sukuna): sure

Did you want him to join now? He’d just gotten out of the shower and thrown on a pair of sweats, he wasn’t exactly decent. But he didn’t want to waste time getting ready only for you to end the live.

“Hi Sukuna!” You smiled and waved when he appeared on the screen.

“Hey.” He waved back, not caring about the angle he was holding the camera in. He saw hearts begin to fill up the screen and comments started to fly by, almost all in caps about the fact he was shirtless talking to you.

“Guys, don’t be weird! Who cares that Sukuna is shirtless?” You tried to stop them, but it was clear you were flustered as well. You weren’t looking at him, peeking at him through the screen a few times.

“God you’re all thirsty as fuck.” Sukuna finally looked at himself on the screen. He was shirtless and in bed, hair slightly damp and tousled on his pillow. Reading a few comments, he shot up. “Of course I’m wearing pants, you nasty fuck!” Storming out of bed, he stood in front of the only mirror in his house that wasn’t in the bathroom and turned the camera around. “See, look!”

“Oh.” Gasping softly, you were glad Sukuna didn’t notice you screenshot the live. Clad in only gray sweatpants, Sukuna’s freshly cleaned skin gleamed in the light of his bedroom and every single muscle and edge of his body was on display.

“There, told you I wasn’t fucking naked.” Rolling his eyes, he flopped back down on the bed. None of the comments had gotten any better, all of them talking about how hot he was and how you were so lucky to know him in real life.

“L-let's talk about something else.” You stammered, not showing your face on camera for a few minutes. Sukuna laughed at the comments teasing you for being embarrassed, agreeing with some of them under his breath.

“So, what the fuck are you all doing here?” Sukuna posed the question at the chat, but at you as well.

“Well before you came everyone was talking about you...and you know how everyone has been begging for us to vlog?” You started off slowly, peeking an eye at his face.

“Yeah?”

“I wanted to call you to ask how you felt about that?” How he felt? Why did you want to know?

“You couldn’t have texted me that?” That wasn’t necessarily what he wanted to say, but it made you chuckle, so it was okay.

“No! I wanted to ask so everyone could know!”

“I don’t mind it.” If you wanted to vlog with him, he would do it in a heartbeat.

“So…” Worrying your lip, you looked off camera for a few seconds before looking directly at Sukuna. “Would you like to be in a vlog with me, at a cafe? It’s outside the city, kind of far, but we can rent a car or-”

“Yes.” Sukuna interrupted, nodding his head quickly. “I’ll come. We don’t have to rent a car, I’ll drive.”

“Really?” The comments were just as shocked as you were. Sukuna never filmed anywhere but his home and the gym, this would be a monumental occasion.

“Did you want me to say no?”

“No!” You screamed immediately, nearly dropping your phone. “I just- I wasn’t expecting you to say yes!”

“Well I did.” Sukuna bit his lip, running a hand through his hair and flexing his arm. “So I guess it’s a date, huh?” His normal asshole confidence was back now that you were appearing through a screen and not right next to him. A surprised sound came from the back of your throat, and you nearly dropped the phone again.

“Y-yeah! A date!” It felt good to have you flustered for once and not Sukuna. Laughing heartily at you, Sukuna smirked at the comments.

“Was that all you wanted to ask me or was there something more?”

“No, that was it!”

“Alright.” Licking his lip and letting his tongue hang out of his mouth a little, Sukuna watched you bite your lip as well. “Well I’m gonna go, I got stuff to do, but I’ll text you later (Y/N).” Dropping his voice as he said goodbye, Sukuna left the livestream.

“Holy fuck.” As soon as his phone was off, Sukuna let out a breath he’d been holding in. His heart was pounding hard despite how confident he was in his actions. Flirting was nothing new to him, but with you it felt different and like he’d never done it before in his life.

He watched the rest of your livestream while he finished getting ready for bed, laughing at the comments still teasing you about getting flustered with him. The notifications for Twitter were going off as well, and he knew for sure that there were new fancams for him to check out later.

(Y/N): Sukuna!! You’re so embarrassing!

Texting him after your stream, your cheeks were still burning at the memory.

(Sukuna): hey, you said it would be good for views and it was

(Y/N): I know…

(Y/N): did you really mean it, about coming with me?

(Sukuna): of course. If I didn’t want to I would have said no

(Y/N): that’s good lol!

There was a lull in conversation, and Sukuna nearly fell asleep waiting for you to either text him again or for him to figure out what to say next.

(Y/N): so, a date huh? Are you going to bring me flowers?

Now he was awake. He didn’t expect you to bring that up again, and his eyes flew open. Sukuna’s fingers hovered over the keyboard, mind going blank on what to say.

(Y/N): lol just kidding! I know you only said that for the stream! I’ll text you later about the details, I’m about to knock out

(Y/N): goodnight :)

Well shit. Now he definitely wanted it to be a date.

#jujutsu kaisen #ryomen sukuna #sukuna x reader #jujutsu kaisen fluff #jujutsu kaisen fanfic #jujutsu kaisen imagines #jujutsu kaisen scenarios

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entity9silvergen · 4 years

Text

How to Track Your Gender Fluidity

Recently I made a post with a screenshot of my gender tracker and was asked how I track my gender’s fluidity. I’ve been meaning to make an instructional post on how to set up the app so I redownloaded the app on a spare phone to show you guys.

In this tutorial, I will explain how to edit the MoodFlow App to track the fluidity of gender including changes and intensity, how to keep the app locked so others cannot look at your data, and how tracking genderfluidity can help someone better understand their gender identity. I will also provide some alternatives if you cannot use this app.

This method of tracking can be used by genderfluid, genderfaun, genderfae, genderflor, gendersylph, genderflux, fluidflux, boyflux, girlflux, enbyflux, questioning individuals, or anyone else on the genderfluid spectrum. Some personalization may be necessary but this tutorial will cover it.

Step 1: Downloading

You want to start by downloading the MoodFlow App.

As you can see, it is intended to be a mood tracker but there are customizable features so you can use it to track other things. It is available for free on the App Store and Google Play.

Step 2: Account Set up

The app will ask you to create an account. You will be prompted to put in your name and birthdate. These are optional.

Step 3: Color Palette

As part of the account set up, you will be asked to pick a color palette. You can change these later or customize them but this is the first important thing when it comes to tracking your gender. The app intends these colors to represent how you’re feeling (very bad, bad, okay, good, very good) but we will be using them to loosely represent your spectrum of gender. Later, these colors will make it easy to visually track your gender. There are five colors but it is okay if you have more than five genders. We will get to that later. They’re more like umbrellas for now. These colors will be a broad, simplified representation which gender you are experiencing on a given days. We will now look at the palettes (see below).

As a genderfaun individual, I personally use the "Default-Balance” palette (purple, purple-blue, blue, blue-green, green) to represent non-binary (purple), male (blue), agender (green), and the genders in between (purple-blue for bigender and blue-green for demigender). It is not a perfect system it works for me.

If you are a genderfae individual, I recommend the “Silver to Purple,” or “Sunset” palettes to represent how your gender varies from feminine, to neutral, to faded or whatever else.

If your fluidity covers the whole spectrum, I’d recommend “Farfalle,” “Sea and Sun,” “Pink to Blue,” “Yellows and Blues,” or “Kilimanjaro.” They have a range of masculine and feminine colors as well as some neutral grounds and mixes.

For any boyfluxes or masculine genderflux people, “Grey Means Neutral,” “By The Lake,” “Tea,” or “Into the Distance” could be used to represent the varying intensity of your gender.

For any girlfluxes or feminine genderflux people, “Raise the Lantern” or “All Pastel Everything” could be used to represent the changing intensity of your gender.

“Gray Scale Me” is a good choice for any genderflux individual with only one gender.

“Mojito,” “Outerspace,” and “Into The Distance” are good choices for people who are xenogender, agender, or just do not like the traditional “masculine vs feminine" system.

Again, you can edit these later, make a custom color palette, or you can just ignore using colors and use other features (explained later) but having a color palette to represent the range of your genderfludity is helpful. You don’t have to use these recommendations either. For me, I associate genders with their flags so I pick colors similar to those but you can do whatever feels right. Any color can represent any gender. You can also play around with it later to find whatever colors fit you best.

Step 4: Settings

When you are done setting up your account, you will open the screen to a calendar.

If you tap the three bars on the top, you will be given a sidebar where you can visit your settings.

In the settings, you can change your personal information, log in and out of your account, enable or disable notifications, and change your rating colors (the color palette).

Step 5: Personalization and Security

Within the settings, you will see the options to change your emotions & ratings, background, activities, and add a pinlock.

The background change is self-explanatory. There's a wide variety of stock images that are very nice but you can also add your own. I like using flags. If you’ve seen any of my old posts, I use a design with cats in the colors of the transflag. If you would like any wallpapers, you can ask me, you can check out r/lgbtwallpaper, just use google images, take your own photo, or use your own art.

You can use the pinlock to prevent other people from looking at your data. If you are in the closet, this can be a very useful so people don’t look at your information. Make sure you remember your pin though.

You can also back up data here but that is something to worry about later.

You can make other changes as well depending on preference.

Step 6: Gender(s), Pronouns, Intensity, etc.

Open emotions & ratings to create your genders. You can also add genders later when you are making entries but it is easy to do here.

Here, you can rename your colors. Where it says rating, just tap the words next to it and you can change it.

To make genders, start by picking your layout. The options are grid, mix, segment, and segment #2. I personally like using segment #2. The layout will separate your genders into four categories. You cannot rename the categories (they will be labeled positive & energized, positive & calm, negative & calm, and negative & energized) so if seeing them bothers you, pick mix. For the tutorial, I am picking segment #2.

You will then see a section labeled editor. You will have the option to add emotions and remove emotions. Start by removing all of the emotions. It starts with 60 (the maximum) so this may take some time.

Once you’ve deleted all the emotions, you can add your genders. It will prompt you to name it and put it in a category (positive & energized, positive & calm, negative & calm, and negative & energized). The categories don’t affect anything but it will change the order the genders are displayed and how they will appear in the app’s analysis features.

Since I am fluidflux and like using the segment #2 layout, I like to order them by intensity. I put libragenders and agender under positive & energized, demigenders under positive & calm, paragenders under negative & calm, and “full” genders under negative & energized. If you are not genderflux, I would recommend sorting them by feminine, masculine, neutral/ other, xenogender, unsure, etc. Again, this depends on the individual so you may want to play around with it. Here is mine:

After you create and organize all of your genders, return to your settings and scroll down to activities. Like before, delete all the activities.

Below, there are a collection of icons. Tap one and you will be able to create an activity. I like to track what pronouns I use, the intensity of my gender, and how fluid or static my gender is. You can also add things like how you’re experiencing gender dysphoria or euphoria that day, your gender expression, and how you are presenting that day. There are many icons to choose from so pick which ones you think suit which thing best.

Step 7: Tracking Your Gender

To track your gender, exit your settings to the app’s homescreen. If you are having trouble finding it, tap the middle option on the bar on the bottom that says “Feed.” Then, in the same spot, tap the plus (+) button. You will be taken to a screen where you add your entry for the day. You should ideally add one entry per day. You need to pick a color summarizing your gender for the day and can select the individual genders you are feeling at the time. Here, you can also add or remove genders by hitting customize.

Hit continue to move to activities. Here, you can select pronouns, intensity, etc. You also have the option of adding photos or listing medication. Listing medication is helpful if you are on testosterone or estrogen and the photos are helpful if you want to remember how you are presenting that day or want to track the effects of HRT.

There is also a place to type labeled journal if you would like to write a more detailed explanation of how you’re experiencing gender or if anything noteworthy has occurred.

By hitting customize, you can enable or disable features. A feature you can enable is tracking sleep. Sleep is tracked on a sliding scale so genderflux individuals can use this to track the intensity of their gender as well.

Step 8: Viewing Your Gender

You can best view your gender from the homescreen/ the feed. Any entries from that day will be shown at the top. By tapping it, you have the option of editing it if you would like to change something later. I would recommend not deleting genders from your entry if your gender changes during the day and instead indicating in some way that it changed.

You can scroll down to see the calendar for that month. Each day will be highlighted with the color you choose that day, making it easy to see any patterns. This is why we choose colors representing masculinity, femininity, neutrality, etc rather than having colors represent individual genders.

On the bottom bar, you can tap calendar to see other months’ data.

The journal section is the place to write down any detailed entries. The insight section will provide some analysis of your entries.

The most useful data is at the top. It will display the oscillation of your gender and the spread over an adjustable period of time based on color.

Below, it will also show how many times you selected a specific gender, pronoun, intensity, etc.

Step 9: More Personalization

Everyone’s gender is different. You may need to edit this further to fit your fluidity. Some people have less than five genders they are fluid between so each color could represent one gender, some people may want different colors to represent different umbrellas of gender, and more.

If you are multigender/ experience more than one gender at a time, it can be kind of difficult figuring out how to add an entry for that. Adding more genders and activities can make it more detailed. It just depends how specific you want your tracker to be.

Just play around with it and figure out what is right for you.

Step 10: Why Tracking Your Gender Is Helpful

Pretty much every trans person has those self-doubt moments and people on the genderfluid spectrum often experience that to a greater degree. I think we all know that feeling when your gender changes and you wonder “What if I’ve been this the whole time?” Very scary, especially if you’re just beginning to figure yourself out or if you’ve already come out.

Tracking your gender helps with that feeling. By having something physical you can look at that proves your gender really was a different one in the past and you weren’t faking or deceiving yourself.

You can see my tracking from 2021 above. I started a new gender tracker this year. In 2020, my gender was actually male (blue) most of the time and my gender would change in some way every few days. As you can see, I was non-binary or bigender for pretty much all of January this year and flipped to libramasculine on the final day. That is very unusual for me so if I was not tracking my gender, I wouldn’t know my gender fluidity was following an abnormal pattern and I likely would have doubted myself a lot and questioned if I was ever really a boy.

If you are questioning your gender identity, a tracker can be helpful because it is more reliable than your memory, assuming you don’t delete anything. There is less room for doubt if you are looking at evidence you really did experience something. And, if you are questioning the fluidity of your gender, the same thing applies.

Of course, someone who is not genderfluid can try this and if you later realize you are not genderfluid despite having varied data on a tracker, that is okay as well. This is a helpful tool but it is not for everyone and ultimately you are the best judge of your identity.

If you cannot use this app, you can also use a calendar or planner. If you are in the closet, marking each day with a colored highlighter isn’t that suspicious. You can also write down the genders you experience on different days and such. You could also try using a period tracker but that may be more difficult since you usually cannot change the settings and symptoms on those.

Anyway, I hope this was helpful. Let me know if you end up using this. Feel free to ask questions to me privately or in the comments or share this post with others. Have fun tracking your gender guys, gals, and non-binary pals!

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