#reluctant friends if anything
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i still haven't finished penacony yet, please don't put any spoilers about it on here.
he's been dancing a lot in his dream lately. he's been dreaming more frequently lately. ever since the astral express the luofu, actually. there's been rumors of them returning soon but yanqing has never been one to entertain rumors. right now, he's dancing all by himself in a garden.
it looks like... fyxestroll garden. except without the mist and with more colors. there's a river going through the garden that surrounds the little pavillion he dances in. the moon is large and shines its light down upon him.
he wonders why he's been dreaming about dancing lately. could it be because of the upcoming war dance. the general has talked about finally introducing him to lady yunli. whenever he talks about the two of them meeting, it feels like he would like to set them up on a date. perhaps he and the general of the zhuming are planning a future elopement between the two?
he can't help but feel sick to his stomach whenever the general talks like that. it makes him dread meeting lady yunli. his heart is already taken, he knows this. he dances by himself until those who own his heart take their places in this dance.
a hand touches his hip while another touches his shoulder. he is now being led by another. he wasn't panicked at all, he felt at ease. yes, this was one of those who owned his heart. he looked up to see blue hair and purple eyes who looked at him as though he parted the clouds to let the moon shine upon them. his hair feels longer than usual.
they danced a simple little waltz, no words spoken between them. there didn't need to be. they were at peace. that was all that mattered.
unfortunately, dreams must come to an end.
"did you have a good dream, my dearest moon?"
that same boy sat in the chair beside his bed. he looked at him with that same look as before. the world was tinted in green. he didn't have time to speak before the boy spoke again.
"our dearest sun will be arriving soon, i wouldn't want to delay your reunion. soon we shall see each other again."
the world returned to normal and the boy disappeared.
right, the representatives from belobog will be arriving in some system hours.
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clara dances around with mr. svarog. he twirls her around and guides her to another part of the ballroom. right now she's a princess who is celebrating her birthday. everyone she knows is attending and also dancing.
ms. bronya and ms. seelee bicker about something as they dance. luka is trying so hard not to bump in to mr. gepard. big sister dances beautifully with big sister march. the moles are holding hands and spinning around in a circle as ms. natasha watches over them. the robots are having their own little dance circles.
the sun shines through the windows, casting a beautiful light in the room. she's been dreaming this dream a lot lately.
mr. svarog twirls her again and she's caught in the embrace of another. she looks up to see a boy with blue hair and purple eyes that looks at her as though she's the reason the sun shines down upon them. he gently guides her in their waltz and no one pays them any mind. it's peaceful. her hair feels shorter than usual.
no words had to be spoken, just smiles and dancing. this dream might be her favorite yet.
unfortunately she has to wake up.
"how was that dream, my dearest sun?"
the boy sat at the foot of her bed with that same look. the world was tinted in green. he spoke again.
"our dearest moon is awaiting your arrival, i cannot wait to see your reunion. do not worry, we shall all see each other again soon."
the world returned to normal and the boy disappeared.
right, she's on her way to the xianzhou luofu as one of the representatives of belobog.
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all he can think of when he sees her is
"our dearest sun."
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all she can think of when she sees him is
"our dearest moon."
#sword of an hour long past au#honkai star rail#yanqing#hsr yanqing#clara#hsr clara#misha#hsr misha#clarmishqing#they're reuniting!!!#i wonder what happened on penacony for that boy to appear...#(yes i got spoilered about what happens to misha but that it)#(please don't leave any spoilers about penacony under this)#ngl i don't see the hype behind yunli x yanqing#they are sworn rivals in my eyes#reluctant friends if anything#man misha sure is reminding me of someone who's name starts with p right now#and also r but that's not until later
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18+only
Something about curling up next to Steve and falling asleep next to him on the couch, but it doesn't mean anything because he's a good friend and he makes you feel safe.
Something about flirting with Steve, but it doesn't mean anything because it's just joking around between two friends.
Something about accidentally kissing when you're both high, but it doesn't mean anything because Eddie was daring you two to.
Something about getting drunk and making out with Steve, but it doesn't mean anything you just know he's a good kisser.
Something about you and Steve making out while sober, but it doesn't mean anything because you were just testing to see if the chemistry was still there.
Something about Steve helping you take off your clothes, but it doesn't mean anything because Steve's now taking off his.
Something about Steve moaning in your ear as he thrusts in you, but it doesn't mean anything as you dig your fingers into his back and scratch.
Something about Steve holding you close and kissing your forehead murmuring how beautiful and pretty you are, but it doesn't mean anything.
It means everything and you can't keep lying to yourself.
#Something about friends who both love each other but are reluctant to say it because they are afraid things will change#But they slowly blur the lines under “it doesn't mean anything we're just two pals two buddies haha anything for a friend”#As if they wouldn't give anything to be with the other person#Anyways these are my thoughts this fine day#I have a few fics I am working on....so be on the lookout for that...okay love you bye#Steve Harrington#Steve Harrington x reader#Steve Harrington x you#Steve Harrington x y/n#Steve Harrington/reader#Steve Harrington/you#Jade is Talking
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People make truth potions soooo serious. Personally if a friend said ‘I like you’ or ‘I love you’ it would be considered something sweet since they cannot lie and didn’t say ‘I hate you’. Not a confession of romantic love that the world must now be staked on as it is acted out
#same as drunk confessions like bro. BRO. be nice and be cool#you should love your friends#what’s the issue#and even if it was a confession of romance or lust well they’re under forced conditions#be nice that they were forced to reveal things they otherwise wouldn’t#what’s hard to understand here#they like you and love you. obviously???#people tend to not spend their free time with people they don’t like????#anyway friendship is cool and truth serum should be less embarrassing over nothing#truth serum deserves better than being a plot device#personally if someone doubled over trying not to say the words ‘I like you’ I think they’d need a tap on the head#it’s not a confession it just sounds like they were reluctant to confess something harmless#and unspoken of I suppose??#isn’t the concern that they’re forced to say anything at all much more harrowing than saying nice things about a friend
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#p4#p4g#persona 4#persona 4 golden#hanamura yosuke#yosuke hanamura#weak when i think about early yosuke constantly living under the surveillance of the townpeople#in a way it kind of explains his reluctance in trying to connect with them (like in the magician manga) which is itself very complex#but for someone who's always on the lookout#for someone whos constantly checking his own behaviour and making sure hes not doing anything that could be perceived as negative#even if he did want to become better friends with kou and daisuke its hard to extend any trust to them#yosuke didnt understand why they were trying to be friendly with him -- to some extent i think its because he just didnt trust them#that they weren't trying to get him to relax so he would do something wrong and then inaba will have one more reason to dislike him#its an overthinking thing!!!#but with yu? he can relax a little because he doesn't expect yu to betray him in that manner.#at the end of the day#after the liquor store and the shadow yosuke incident#yosuke KNOWS that yu is someone that has his back#amd maybe that knowledge is still a little tentative because hes still unwilling to be fully honest with yu during their early friendship#but deep down he has the evidence that yu is on his side. he wants to believe that yu will continue to be on his side. :')#and this first friendship is what enables him to actually form more meaningful bonds with other people#i mean. after saki and the blowback from him trying to connect with saki.#is it any wonder that he's a bit reticent#but ah look. hes still doing that thing where he puts on an air of nonchalance and confidence and plays it off with a joke#even as it bothers him. :')#he's good with his queue
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ok i guess i’ll start invi.ncible……
#* out of ‚#same reluctance on taking too long to get into the b.oys#but my friend hasn’t seen it either so we will be diving in together ty wish us luck#i don’t rlly know anything about it besides the VAs tbh fksjfksj#but i know there’s also a comic !#should i.. watch the show or read the comics ??#i’ll probably do both depending on if i end up liking either or tbh
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Excuse you, where is my "Stiles and Isaac has been secretly dating for a year before Scott got bitten" fanfiction? You know, the one were their relationship got challenged when Stiles began lying to Isaac and finding excused to not meet up, all to help his best friend and co. with everything going on? In which Isaac gets into a big fight with Stiles before he gets turned, which makes things ten times worse when Isaac finds out his boyfriend knew about the supernatural and have been lying all this time? You know what I'm talking about.
#boyfriends to enemies to reluctant allies to boyfriends again#I'm a sucker for secret relationship but also it makes sense for it to be a secret with Isaac's father#I swear Stiles tries at least once a month to convince his boyfriend to report his father after all his father's the sheriff everything is#going to be ok. but also he can understand why Isaac won't do anything about it. All Stiles can do is be there for him#ANYWAY just the idea of people finding out they have been dating all this time? Gold#also the parallels??? because Stiles has prioritised his best friend and supernatural over his own boyfriend where Scott has done the#opposite#we all know Stiles kept it quite just to protect Isaac and keep him away from danger but still. Isaac doesn't see it like that#ok.but them getting back together and then the Nogitsune shit takes place???? they can't catch a break#teen wolf isaac#isaac lahey#teen wolf stiles#stiles stilinski#stiles x isaac#the betrayal man. the hurt. the PAIN. I love it#stisaac#teen wolf stisaac#teen wolf#if there's a fic similar with what I'm saying herr pls pls PLS let me know??? tge idea won't leave my mind and I'm losing it#Scott asking Stiles if he was ok after the break up and Stiles insisting that he's fine while Scott keep insisting and Stiles...#just breakdowns? but like more like blows up. he's hurt and it feels unfair that Scott got to keep the girl and be a werewolf while Stiles#lost everything. even his relationship with his father's shit because of all the lying he has done to protect/help the pack#and for what???#he lowkey knows is not Scott's fault. Stiles has made some choices and has to live up with the consequences#that doesn't really stop it from lashing at scott before starting to have a panick attack over losing Isaac#yk first love and all shit. that hurts the worst
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Diantha and Malva are so ♠️ coded to me
#finally have the holy trinity of dia <3 lance. dia <> geeta. and dia <3< malva lmfaooo#but your honour listen#cause ive been thinking abt them for a while now#bc of my silly little concepts#they give exes who havent moved on from each other and still want each other carnally vibes real#they give reluctant friends w benefits#im sure as fuck they hate fucked inside one of the league restrooms at least once#or a few times maybe idk#they could ruin each others reputation#they cant live without the other#they want the other dead#they understand each other so much#theyre so fucked up your honour#theyd be all snide comments and snarky responses#but theyd be fucking damned if anything actually happens to the other one#its giving 'shes a bitch but shes my bitch and only i get to call her that'#they make me so ill#angelfireshipping#random bs
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joyous day i get to go to miku expo tomorrow however due to my devastating lack of a large friend circle all of my friends who i asked to go with me cancelled and now i have to attend the hatsune miku concert with my father
#is this humiliating for me as a grown ass adult yes so im trying to recon with it by making jokes.#he doesn't know anything about it he's just a giant tech nerd so when i said the performer is a projection he immediately volunteered lmao#i need more friends sigh. nothing against my dad im sure he understands why im reluctant i appreciate his willingness nonetheless
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Love when plans get cancelled last minute 🙃
#ace is a grumpy bean#supposed to be meeting college friends and ten minutes before i need to leave to meet them one of them messages that actually#theyve been feeling unwell all day which they didnt mention this morning when the other said that they were having car troubles#and now that its the time were supposed to be meeting they wont definitively decide whether theyre not coming out or not#like a lil heads up maybe? or at least a definitive answer? im leaving tomorrow morning so i need to pack#but i cant do anything until someone answers#edit: friend with car troubles wouldnt respond to gc about whether or not they were coming or to texts#unwell friend said theyd wait to hear from them about whether to cancel or go anyway and finally hour later they responded#apparently theyd been asleep the whole time 🙃#it wouldnt have been super convenient to meet up tonight for drinks anyway as i need to pack and i did see them once already#and it woulda been fun to see them again but theyre always so reluctant during the planning process so its just a lil annoying
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Ill have you know i am a brown himejoshi
I like that Chilchuck says that he only stayed on to help with Falin bc he was paid upfront so couldn’t quit when he wanted to, but later admits to the orc teen that he could’ve quit, and didn’t because he was too stubborn to let her go. And the reason he regretted it was because he felt like by having that hope he ended up putting his friends in danger. And then also out of everyone in the party he was the one who ended up breaking down in tears because he wasn’t able to handle watching his friends risk their lives. That man cares more than anyone he just can’t drop his hatersona. Life is agony for repressed middle aged people who love deeply.
#Also not quite what I’m saying#I mean sort of but not exactly#I don’t think he’s embarrassed or shy about caring for his friends#I think it’s more that he still has issues with trusting his party bc of past experiences with other people he’s worked with#Which make him reluctant to say anything that could get him into a situation where he’s taken advantage of#Also it’s weird to call me white because i did character analysis#Like I’m creole I just have thoughts sometimes
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This weekend I'm driving to the beach with one of my best friends. Last time we did the trip, he told me halfway through the 3-hour drive that he'd been dating someone for several months. Shall we take bets now on what huge news he's going to drop on me this time?
#that was incredibly on brand for him but remains deeply hilarious to me#I want you to picture me driving along rural delaware roads trying to be normal about this reveal#knowing I have to wait another hour-and-change until I can text anyone to tell them about this massive update#(obvs only told ppl who did not also know him)#asking questions and trying to be supportive while my internal monologue is just 'what the fuck what the fuck'#for context I fully thought this friend was asexual/aromantic bc he had never once been in a serious relationship#or expressed much interest in anyone#that's on me for being wrong lmao#(despite not being told for several months I was then the only person who knew about his boyfriend for another several months)#(like he did not tell his parents who he lived with at the time until they'd been together for over six months)#(they aren't homophobic or anything my friend is just. really reluctant to talk about himself)#anyway accepting bets now!
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the only person willing 2 put up w my negative depressive hater self is Me n thts why only i shall be/am my only 'friend' its gr8 (acquaintance more like. but i digress.)
#more 'reluctant frenemy tht hates me but cant do anything abt it' lol#i cant let others b my friend either or theyll h8 me 2. its a party of one here. [realizes i made an mIp reference kinda] [gasps]#do my past selves count. bc i look back on our stupid rambles n chuckle sometimes or weep 4 them. Solidarity.#delete later
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The way that I would love to write about these two in a fanwork? I would love to ramble about them whenever given the chance! 👀
*Casually inserts some vintage World War II-era romance between Muriel and Eustace in the tags*
I recently watched some Courage which inspired me to doodle young versions of Eustace and Muriel. Probably in their 20's or something.
#reblog#courage the cowardly dog#muriel bagge#eustace bagge#cartoon network#reblogging because this has been on my mind for a little bit#i like to think that eustace was a world war ii veteran who had a rough childhood initially#eustace apparently joined with the friends he did have in order to manifest a sense of self purpose#eustace grew up not having much also#eustace felt immense jealousy after having his family prefer his older brother over him#and that jealousy was carried with him into adulthood#fast forward after the events of wwii#muriel’s working at a small cozy cafe where she is trying to make ends meet#eustace sees muriel upset probably because of war related circumstances or she had lost someone close#muriel takes note of eustace trying to provide company in some way and she is everso greatful#eustace tells muriel about the war and what all he had been through with losing his childhood friends who enlisted with him together#muriel tells him about the things she had been through while struggling to make ends meet with cooking and running her cafe#the two talk for a bit and muriel takes the first move with romance involved#eustace is reluctant but would do anything for muriel as a result of her being the only one who was and still is kind to him#in short: eustace had been through a lot with family issues and grievances#muriel is there to help him#muriel also does not have a mean bone in her body so she is willing to treat anyone with the warmth and hospitality she had given eustace#i love these two sm#i really like the fan work made for them btw! i wish there was more lol#oops i rambled again#josh.txt
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#think my feelings'll have to come to an end soon#but idk why im so reluctant to do so..what im still holding on to..#idk man#we are friends!! real good ones at that#and a year ago i never would have imagined!!#but ithink to me its clear from her end that it was never anything more than that for her#even if sometimes for me i hoped and hoped#cant seem to let go of that hope completely#even though im thankful in so many ways like#i cant seem to convince myself right now this is enough#im like#being mentally not ill is so hard too cuz#i want to be like 'oh ofc it makes sense shes not interested in me who would be'#and its so easy to think that#and have that be the calming thought that shuts down delusion#its so much harder for me to say shes not into u but thats okay there might be someone else in the future#what that implies i have absolutely no fucking idea#i dont wanna do dating apps yall like#everything abt it feels so unappealing#i actually genuinely wanna go down the friends to lovers route but god is it so painful.#and seeing how successful ive been in making friends thus far uhh...#finding someone else to kinda even start being attached to that isnt her in a non platonic sense is hard#like w her the feelings too are just very deep#there are casual crush moments here and there for sure i think but nothing thats quite felt like this#and it kinda sucks lol#how are you supposed to find someone#i also wanna. be okay with. not finding someone#and god for the longest time in my life i was okay with that but now im not and its so unfamiliar and idk how to reconcile it#honestly i wanna be someones go to person#but no one wants to be that for me i think so ive been trying to become that person for myself but
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#whyyyyy am i so annoyed and pessimistic all the timeeeee#like a friend invited me out and was talking about potential places to go#and i was like ugh all of these places sound like a hassle and i just wanna stay in my house#and not go anywhere or do anything#like idk when my attitude shifted like this bc i used to be super social#but it feels like nowadays i only want to be alone#or at most in the company of like maybe one or two people#everything just feels so overwhelming and like a lot of things are objectively going right in my life#for the first time in a long time#and i feel like an asshole because it’s like damn bitch this still won’t make you happy?#like i finally have a stable job and a loving relationship and i still find ways to make myself miserable#and i just feel like an ungrateful bitch#how do i stop being so fucking irritable? how do i stop being insufferable to be around?#like i feel rude bc im always leaving plans early and i always feel so out of it while im out with people#like i’m just a spectator and then people expect me to participate in whatever’s going on#and i have to work so hard just to act like a regular fucking person#who isn’t seething and grappling with some unknowable thing under the surface#and of course i realize i am not unique in this at all. everyone’s going through something#but i guess i just feel bad bc it’s affecting my relationships#like i feel so isolated from everyone and so reluctant to open up#and like how do i be like hey sorry man im not avoiding you bc i hate you i just feel unfit for human consumption right now#like what does that even mean?#anyway i don’t wanna go to work. im so tired#personal
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i am slightly upset
#🕰️#i’m so happy you guys are having fun in your own friend groups hahahahahhaha#im so glad im the only friend you have who doesn’t belong to anything hahahahahah. i’m gonna go home and bury my face in the sand#fuck me though lol.#i am so reluctant to tag this as a vent i do not want this to show up in those tags
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