#regardless I’m gonna write some stuff & post it I just want to see how many of you guys are arcane girlies too lol
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smallishzine · 3 days ago
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Just a small heads up, if you include shipping you may wanna make it clear that there are ships and what ships are there. A lot of people aren’t comfortable with shipping, especially since I’ve seen people say Joel thinks it’s a bit weird to be shipped with anyone other than Lizzie (needs to be fact checked, this is just what I’m seeing in boat boys comment sections). Maybe consider making the ship stuff a separate section or just telling people in advance (pinned post, bio, anywhere clear works) that it includes shipping so those who don’t like it can walk away.
important info about the zine plz read even if you didn’t send the ask:
thank you for the heads up! We’re about to get super rambly and vaguely off topic but we promise all your points get addressed. This is actually a great opportunity to clarify, because I realized I didn’t explain myself particularly clearly, if some one does choose to include shipping, its all going to have to be subtext (as always except for shadowbeans whose alternate ship name I still refuse to use), but that is for non-canon ships. Regardless of how people feel about it, c!Joel and c!Jimmy did in fact kiss in Real Life smp, and c!Joel and c!Sausage did in fact have a child together in esmp2, so we’re not gonna rewrite events. Basically when I say shipping in the context of this zine I mean taking relationships the c!Joel had with other people and creating moments that didn’t necessarily happen but feel plausible for the characters that are able to be interpreted as romantic as well as platonic. Also, everyone’s definition of ship art is different, so the level that I was thinking is pretty mild (and btw I’d like to interject here that this is not me dissing on shipping or ship art love shipping so much that I found a ship called the relation and I never left it, but I also know that people have all sorts of comfort levels with different things so this zine is going to be dry docked but I assure you that out there on my super secret personal blog we are very much lost at sea). Like, to give some examples of what would be okay versus not okay for the zine: kissing is pretty much off limits, honestly mostly because that’s a pretty boring zine piece, there’s nothing going on except the ship, but anything where any sort of romance is up to the interpretation, such as hugging, handholding, spending time with, these are all normal things, but also this can’t be the focus of the piece. Please no one just draw like Joel and someone hugging and call it a day. Implied shipping is allowed to feature in your piece, not be the main focus of it. That’s just not an interesting zine piece. Valid art/writing, still amazing stuff keep sharing it on the internet it’s very interesting, just not in the context of this zine. Anyway, you are correct about not everyone being comfortable with that stuff, so if any piece comes off as really shippy without violating the guidelines we’ll make sure to label it correctly, but also, I should make it clear, I’m really hoping that shipping doesn’t become the focus of this zine. It is a Joel zine, so Joel should remain the focus, and any shipping would be subtextual and not central to the zine. There are many great Joel ships out there with lovely content to consume, but that’s not really the focus of this zine. Also, that aside, if Joel doesn’t want his character (because we are talking about shipping cs here. Cc!Joel is a lovely person, but this zine is going to be in-character. Also while cc!Joel should absolutely be respected in what sort of fan content he wants people making about him, his character is, well, just that: a character. Its like saying you can’t ship two characters from an animated tv show because their irl voice actors aren’t comfortable being shipped. It’s just two different things) shipped with characters who don’t belong to his wife, he should probably stop making his c! kiss all those men. And have children with them. And send them love hearts in the mail. And call them babe. If he did it in canon it’s probably safe to say we’re good having them do it in fan content. But again shipping should be an extremely small part of the zine if it’s there at all and should be subtextual enough that even people who don’t ship can still positively engage with the zine!!! If it needs a warning, it’s probably too shippy.
also all this aside if I’m handling this wrong guys I’m sorry I’m only one person and it’s really stressful trying to please everybody I promise I’m trying my best but I just wanna get together with a bunch of other people who share this strange fascination with the bean man and make art and writing about it I don’t wanna get canceled or something I promise I’m trying my best. I’m really struggling to balance my love of creating shipping fan content and realizing that not everyone is comfortable with that and it’s really difficult and stressful I just can’t we all just draw and write what makes us happy I just want this to be a fun experience and being yelled at on the internet for drawing two characters who’s ccs aren’t in an irl relationship being something other than friends is not my definition of a good time. I’m not accusing you anon of doing anything like that the ask was very respectful but I’m worried this post will prompt less polite people to come and yell at me.
-mod Dinn
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chirpsythismorning · 15 days ago
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Yeah a teaser dropping on ST day would be cool. But can we agree that a DNA board reveal would be infinitely better?
#byler#stranger things#st5 predictions#st5 dna board#yes I know a dna board reveal doesn’t qualify as like major promo since most fans want something visual and real#and so it’s likely we’ll get a teaser regardless#which is great#but I’m just imagining the rest of the day being subpar in terms of stuff for us to actually analyze outside of the teaser#they released the s4 dna board during lockdown and a couple months before they even finished writing it#so s5’s board is definitely finalized by now#and it would cost them nothing…#well i mean technically it could cost them everything 😭#it’s just a matter of how on the nose they were about some of the titles it features#and if they’re willing to risk sharing that at this time when there’s still a year until release#i could see a decent amount of films on it being incriminating on so many different fronts#but I could also see some super random stuff in the mix that would distract people from reading into the incriminating stuff#it’s just something that could actually keep us busy analyzing for a while#a teaser would be everything we need rn#but the dna list is what I actually want 😭#i’ve been working on my own st5 dna board wishlist bc I’m so impatient for this#i’m gonna post it tomorrow#it’s time#and in the case they do reveal the dna board next week I want to have mine ready to see if there are any matches#i’ve also been working on my st5vision playlist for nearly 2 years now (jesus) and it’s time to share that too#soon!!
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ellieslittlewh0re · 2 months ago
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heyyy so uh sorry ive been dead or whatever but would you guys be interested in arcane related one shots/ fanfics? (specifically caitvi, vi x reader, sevika x reader) bc all this season 2 stuff is getting me so excited and I feel like I HAVE to write about it yk?
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crescentlyautumn · 1 year ago
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I need to get something off my chest. Very personal rant below.
I’m gonna say this once and only once: Let people write and imagine characters how they want. Canon or not. Please stop ruining fandom, but also enjoyable and happy places for people because they don’t think exactly like you.
This is not a callout post to or about any person or group. It’s legit just me feeling so close to leaving the KimChay community because of the amount of gatekeeping and harassment going on. I don’t care where you stand or how you see the characters/ship.
I legit could care less in this stance. I like pretty much everything, regardless of what I write or not. But the bullying and pettyness is reaching a breaking point for me, and I’m almost in tears over it now. Something I love is being ruined for me.
I hate drama. I hate people saying and doing stuff behind backs. I hate discourse. I know it’s inevitable. I’m aware it’s always gonna happen. But please, stop pulling me in it and directing it at me. I’m bleeding on the floor at this point.
I wanna support so many people and read so many fics. See tons of versions of these characters I love so much. But being beaten down over and over again is making me step away more and more. Can we just all do our own thing and be ok with it?
If you don’t like a version or stance, valid. But please don’t be so cruel and mean about it. Look away and move on. At this point I don’t know when I’ll touch KimChay again because I’m legit sick at my stomach over all this. I’m so tired of this battle I never wanted.
Real people are behind these screens. Real human people with real human feelings. Please remember that. Have some empathy and have some compassion. Am I a sensitive person? Yeah and I know it. But I’m also watching in real time people getting hurt over this.
Myself included. Be yourselves. Write your stories. Drop your meta. But for the love of whatever, stop throwing around so much hurt. I mean it when I say I care about everyone, even if they hate me or curse me. I hope you find peace and happiness someday.
Because I have never and will never be a person that feels satisfaction from others pain and unhappiness. So please let people be. Let people live. These are people after all. Please remember that. Stay safe.🤍💛
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kyluxtrashpit · 8 months ago
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WIP Folder Game
RULES: post the names of all the files in your WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them, and then post a little snippet or tell them something about it! and then tag as many people as you have WIPs.
Thanks for the tag, @nonsensicalsoliloquy!
So I distinguish between “active” WIPs and “probably abandoned” WIPs, where the first are ones that I may not be working on right now, but I still think there’s a good chance I’ll get around to them eventually. The second are really exactly what they sound like - maybe I’ll pick them up again at some point, but for the moment I’ve kinda accepted they probably won’t get done
So for the sake of this list, I’m using only the names of the “active” ones. If anyone is curious about the “probably abandoned” list, let me know and I’ll post those too, there’s just a lot more in there lmao as my active list is pretty short right now and I have stuff that dates back to 2016 in the other list lmao. There are some banger ideas there, though, if I do say so myself, so let me know if y’all want to see them
Star wars:
Bad Things
Braids
Renben 7
~*~*~
Plague doctor:
Lera + Serovolk
Lera meets the Rag
Soft Bottom Oleg
Not sure who to tag, so just gonna pick some people I know who write and I think like these, but no pressure to do this if you don’t want to! @kylosbreedingkink @aptenodykes @eldritchmochi @iwishtocountthestars @bunny--manders @bostarsky
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multi-lefaiye · 2 years ago
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MUTUALS POWERPOINT NIGHT: MULTI EDITION
HELLO gamers! it is i, tumblr user xavier multi-lefaiye, here to present my very good powerpoint to y'all. i am posting this early because i like being early <3
as some of you may know, i had a few other ideas for powerpoints, one of which i finished before going "hm i wanna do something else" and doing something else.
as i am sure you are all very well-aware by this point, my biggest fixation is tales from the gas station. so i decided to do my powerpoint about that instead of explaining in-depth how i'd rewrite every episode of notable bad horror tv series lost tapes. you're welcome <3
tagging the participants real quick (if i forgot you i prommy i am just forgetful and it was not intentional, ilsym): @wherearetheplants @nicola-writes @cnnamonrolls @abouttogetshellshocked @approximately20eggs @yourlocal-lichen @astralrunic
anyway! my slides will be under the cut, but if you'd rather see the actual presentation, here's the google slides link: [link]
comments are enabled but no one is obligated to leave any for any reason! i mainly enabled them because i may send this to some discord folks later who enjoy leaving silly comments.
anyway let's gooooo
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[Transcript:
TALES FROM THE GAS STATION: A BRIEF SUMMARY
OR: an explanation of my blorbos
by tumblr user multi-lefaiye
/ End Transcript]
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[Transcript:
what the fuck is this series?
Tales From the Gas Station started as a creepypasta series on the NoSleep subreddit
Then it kinda blew up and became popular enough that the creator reworked and rewrote the series to make them into books
There are four books total and also a seven-part comic series in the works!
Essentially, this is a horror-comedy series centering around a character named Jack Townsend, the minimum-wage employee of a shitty gas station at the edge of an even shittier small town, which also happens to be the epicenter of many supernatural happenings
/ End Transcript]
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[Transcript:
DISCLAIMER
I haven’t finished reading the full series yet because [redacted] redacted] [redacted]
But regardless I’m MOSTLY basing this presentation on book one to avoid spoiling later events for people who wanna check this out themselves :)
This is not an exhaustive presentation unfortunately.
Look at this raccoon
/ End Transcript]
[Image Description: An image of a raccoon behind the wheel of a car, positioned as though it's driving. End ID.]
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[Transcript:
Content warnings!!
So I’m not gonna go into the triggering stuff in this presentation, but if you wanna check out TFTGS yourself I wanna give a heads up where I can.
I also will try to give context to things where I can if I feel that it’s needed, but yeah point is I want to make sure anyone who checks this out knows what they’re getting into.
Anyway full list of warnings on the next slide let’s go
/ End Transcript]
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[Transcript:
Okay here are the actual content warnings
There are a few side/minor characters who are really blatantly racist and xenophobic b/c TFTGS does not shy away from the fact that it takes place in a small, shitty southern US town--these characters are condemned by the narrative and clearly The Assholes but still, tread lightly.
Casual ableism, especially towards Jack, including the use of the r-slur (once again also condemned by the narrative but still)
Lots and lots of violence and murder
Suicide
Lots of talk of terminal illness
Drug use
Cults
Psychiatric abuse
SOME graphic depictions of blood n’ gore n’ corpses, but the gore is never the focus thankfully
/ End Transcript]
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[Transcript:
CHARACTERS!!!
FULL DISCLAIMER: THIS IS ALL PRETTY MUCH MY INTERPRETATIONS OF THE CHARACTERS. Many of them don't have much in the way of physical descriptions and these are all just my personal designs for the characters :) Yay
/ End Transcript]
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[Transcript:
JACK TOWNSEND
The universe’s favorite punching bag
He’s got that autistic tboy swag and I love him so so much
Chronically ill since he was in high school
Just fucking vibing
Frequently gets insulted and beaten down and it stresses me out but he gets less and less chill about it as the series goes on. I think he deserves to throw rocks at people
I relate to him a lot and idk what that says about me <3
Blorbo <3333
/ End Transcript]
[Image Description: A picrew of Jack Townsend from Tales From the Gas Station, a tired young white man with dark bags under his eyes, a small beard, and shaggy black hair. He looks worried and is wearing a blue shirt under a black hoodie. End ID.]
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[Transcript:
ANTONIO / TONY
So I’m not quite sure how to talk about him without spoiling a bunch of shit
Ah well
One of Jack’s coworkers and his best friend in volume 1!
Kind of a sweet, anxious guy who’s just trying his best
What’s a little accidental murder between besties??? It was an accident, it’s fine.
King of being a really good and trustworthy guy with nothing else going on
I love him genuinely
/ End Transcript]
[Image Description: A picrew of Antonio from Tales From the Gas Station, a young Latino man with tan skin, curly brown hair, multiple piercings in his ears, and a beard. He has his mouth open as though he's speaking, and he wears a blue collared shirt under a denim jacket. End ID.]
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[Transcript:
JERRY PASCAL
Jack’s emotional support human and bestie
Kind of like a puppy, except that puppy does a lot of illegal shit and kills people
Former member of a murderous cult called Mathmetism
Referred to as Marlboro for most of the first book b/c Jack doesn’t know his name
Big stupid energy but also the smartest bitch in the room. Depends on what would be funnier
Would fight god in the parking lot
If he’s being serious, something is wrong
/ End Transcript]
[Image Description: A picrew of Jerry Pascal from Tales From the Gas Station, a white man with shaggy blond hair, a small beard, and multiple piercings in his ears. He has a wide smirk on his face and wears a yellow t-shirt with a graphic of the sun across the front under a red hoodie jacket, and one hand is visibly holding a cigarette. End ID.]
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[Transcript:
SPENCER MIDDLETON
MY POOR LITTLE MEOW MEOW
Too sexy and evil for gender
My design for him is very far from canon and I am aware of that. However I think everyone should draw him as a long-haired prettyboy <3
He’s just so babygirl <3
I hate him and love him in equal measure
God let him live another day and that’s everyone else’s problem
Anyway I just think he’s neat and should do more crimes
/ End Transcript]
[Image Description: A picrew of Spencer Middleton from Tales From the Gas Station, a white man with long ginger hair, a light beard, and pierced ears. He has a sharp grin on his face, showing his sharp teeth, and is wearing all black. End ID.]
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[Transcript:
AMELIA O'BRIEN
Cop (unfortunate)
I have very mixed feelings about her as a character ngl and most of them tie back to her being a cop
I do think she’s interesting though
Wish she’d cool it with the casual ableism though <3 Like I know it’s not just her but goddamn
Anyway I guess she counts as a #girlboss
One time one of my friends compared her to the gay cop in Onward and I can’t stop thinking about it because God So True
/ End Transcript]
[Image Description: A picrew of Amelia O'Brien, a Black woman with dark hair pulled back into a bun and pierced ears. She has a stern expression on her face and wears a light shirt under a dark vest and brown jacket, with one hand holding a cigarette. End ID.]
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[Transcript:
ROSA VASQUEZ
Sweetest girl in the world
Technically doesn’t show up until volume 2 but I love her so much so I’m talking about her here
Newest hire at the gas station and completely unprepared for The Horrors
She adapts pretty quickly though
Has a really huge really obvious crush on Jack and tbh I think it’s cute
Unfortunately he is oblivious
Besides that though she’s a very fun character and makes me very happy :)
/ End Transcript]
[Image Description: A picrew of Rosa Vasquez from Tales From the Gas Station, a young Latina woman with brown skin, dark brown hair that hangs loosely around her shoulders, and pink earrings. She has a wide smile on her face and is wearing a pink shirt under a dark denim jacket, with one hand held up in a peace sign. End ID.]
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[Transcript:
SABINE
We don’t need to talk about her
So we’re not going to talk about her
You have to read volume 2 to get this backstory
/ End Transcript]
[Image Description: A picrew of Sabine from Tales From the Gas Station, a young woman with lightly tanned skin, pierced ears, curly brown hair, and freckles. Her mouth is open slightly and she wears a black choker, a black t-shirt with a skull on it, and a red jacket. Two of her hands are held up and her pointer fingers are pressed together. End ID.]
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[Transcript:
MISC. CHARACTERS I'M NOT MAKING PICREWS OF
Kieffer - the world’s most killable man! A local politician and, arguably, part of the reason everything goes to shit.
Benjamin - a monster hunter who’s convinced that there’s something evil in the gas station. And he’s gonna kill it.
Vanessa Riggin - another employee at the gas station who unfortunately disappears during volume 1.
Brother Riley - local bookstore owner and ray of sunshine! Got basically excommunicated for teaching kids to read
Dr. V - psychiatric abuse: the character! (Jack’s psychiatrist who doesn’t seem particularly interested in actually helping him)
Deputy Tom - cop (unfortunate), but also Jack’s kinda father figure.
Agents Brick Roscoe - idk how to even get into this so I simply will not.
/ End Transcript]
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[Transcript:
PLOT!!!
/ End Transcript]
[Image Description: Two edited memes featuring raccoons. One shows a raccoon facing the camera, with a photoshopped human hand holding a gun pointing at the viewer. The other shows a raccoon in front of a sunset and looking to the left, with a faded image of a screaming raccoon behind it. The second meme reads: "Physically pained, Mentally drained" / End ID.]
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[Transcript:
Volume 1 Premise
The premise of volume 1 centers quite a bit around Kieffer, a local politician.
Picture this: your best friend pulls you aside at work and asks you about the guy who just came into the store. After you explain who the guy is, your friend says, “No, that can’t be him. I killed him last night. His body is in my trunk.”
That’s the day Jack is having.
A wild series of events follows, made worse when Jack starts documenting his experiences in a blog to keep himself sane
People start going missing! Other people start dying! Kieffer especially starts dying!
Jack is not being paid enough to deal with any of this!
/ End Transcript]
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[Transcript:
Other things about volume 1 I wanna say, minus context
I think Spencer Middleton is babygirl material and I will not be silenced b/c I am so right
There is a genuinely really clever bit of writing in volume 1 centering around Jack’s leg injury but I don’t know how to explain it without spoilers so just know I think it’s really cool
The Bathroom Cowboy is a cool dude and I think I would like to be his best friend
I think Jack should be allowed to have a nice day for once in his fucking life
Rita the raccoon is a girlboss
The Man in the Raincoat is so gender
Agents Brick Roscoe confuse and frighten me. They’re also really funny
/ End Transcript]
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[Transcript:
Here's a quote from volume 1 that I think captures the style of comedy well
She walked up to the counter and smiled and asked, "What do you think?"
What a great question. I think a lot of things, actually. I ran through a shortlist of answers. I think people spend too much time mowing their lawns. I think Marlboro's probably dead, and I may be somewhat responsible. I think no man ever steps in the same river twice. I think that, in terms of reality, perception outweighs actuality in every case, but if I were to say something like that in this town I'd get my ass kicked for being a pretentious dick. I think Tony was too hard on 'Temple of Doom.' I think every magazine is a scam. (Why should I pay for a magazine when it's already full of advertisements?) I think forcing children to recite the pledge of allegiance is creepy, and hot dogs are not sandwiches (they are, in fact, American tacos). I think things at the gas station are getting worse and I can't explain why.
/ End Transcript]
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[Transcript:
by viewing this presentation you promise that if you ever read tftgs you have to tell me (tumblr user multi-lefaiye) all of your thoughts about it
/ End Transcript]
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[Transcript:
i’m kidding, you don’t have to, i just wanna talk about this series with people
/ End Transcript]
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[Transcript:
Thanks
/ End Transcript]
[Image Description: A picture of a raccoon sitting up and with its forepaws together, its teeth bared in a way that makes it looks like it's grinning evilly. End ID.]
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snekdood · 1 year ago
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im sorry that i had to block you because this topic is pretty triggering for me and I was worried you were going to be like “all content is fine” and didn’t want to be around that energy. I usually try not to knee jerk react like that but in this case it was hard due to my trauma. I can tell this is going to be a hard conversation for me for that reason. and before i even talk about it i wanna say- idk anything about antis or proshippers or whatever tf bc i dont care about fandom stuff and I agree with your other post that reducing it to fandom nonsense is stupid bc I think it ignores actual meaningful conversations around this.
im also sorry if my comment made it sound like I was downplaying your experience with (still assuming: a community within?) tetris, I read your comment as if the game itself was the issue and not the (supposed? im sorry i just dk about your history in this regard (or if there was a community or what)) community, and I get your point but I’d argue colorful blocks =/= cp in its ability to harm people and its a rocky comparison imo. i do genuinely believe drawn images can harm people, even the person drawing it. but regardless, i’m sorry if I made your experience sound trivial, as that wasn’t my intention.
back into the subject though: i do think having stuff like that online is harmful. i agree a lot of the issue is adult spaces mixing with kids spaces, but I really do struggle to believe that seeing something like rape being glorified doesnt effect people, even if they’re adults. no people aren’t gonna go “whelp, time to rape people” as soon as they read something like that, but exposure over time to explicitly non con (not consentual non con) stuff i think does alter your perception of whats “okay”. its in fact the reason id argue my abusive ex ended up thinking its fine to cross peoples boundaries, because of how many times they repeatedly encountered that stuff either online or in their own art after discovering it online.
i just dont buy this idea that fiction never effects reality. fiction that glorifies certain actions without making it clear its bad in some way will embolden people. and while i dont think someone just. plays grand theft auto and starts shooting everyone and stealing their cars, i do believe it can make someone (subconsciously, obv no one directly thinks like this) questioning if they wanna be violent become violent because of how much “fun” it seems in the games or that it becomes “less of a big deal”.
I dont have a solution for moderating this stuff. and I’m also very against censoring things, I literally have a comic thats about a self insert whos a rape victim and going into that story, but bc I worry people will completely miss the point and end up fetishizing the rape, i’ve decided not to actually add anything in the comic that is directly read as rape, rather just hint at it, because honestly it also effects me on a very real level, it’s very triggering for me to see that kind of imagery (and its already hard for me to write the comic bc of the villain being a rapist and how triggering he is to me) but also because I think it could fundamentally alter someones perception of whats fine, especially if they already hate me.
it’s not like *all* depictions of certain things are bad but it depends on whether or not its glorifying that thing and not making it at all clear that its bad. the stuff i was exposed to as a kid explicitly suggested that it was fine and normal, and id argue a lot of fucked up porn online is that- there’s so much fucked up porn made by (likely) cishet dudes that glorifies raping/torturing/killing anime girls or whatever and I just struggle to believe its just an outlet for what they want to do, like i dont think theyre just “getting it all out” in the image, if anything, i think those drawings they make embolden them more. they draw them because they want to see that stuff happen, not because they want to avoid actually hurting people. i really doubt these dudes, if they had access to a girl they could easily over power, wouldn’t try some of that sort of shit on her, at the very least rape her.
I don’t know what the solution is, but i really do not think we need to make space for dudes like that. and i also think its just factually incorrect to say that fiction never effects reality. of course, fiction is born from reality, but its the fact that that subject material is now being spread to a wider audience that makes it effect reality.
I’m worried when this topic comes up that people think the internet should just be a “free for all” and that “anything should go”, that bc we experience censorship in queer spaces that suddenly means everything should be on the table “because conservatives hate us anyways so why not just let it all loose?”. that people will do a 180 from whatever a conservative does, as if that’s helpful in this instance. I do think theres stuff that shouldn’t be tolerated or accepted in our spaces. not saying you dont agree necessarily but thats my general worry about all of this. I really dont think its as revolutionary as people think to go “conservatives think im a horrible person anyways for being queer so that means fuck it all and all kinks are created equal now”, I really do think theres stuff we need to keep out of our community or at least try to, no matter what conservatives say. I think people really need to figure out how to divorce whatever conservatives think and feel from what they think is the best course of action. just because a conservatives does A doesnt mean we should do B, etc. I think thats an attitude that can actually be easily exploited by the right and used against us.
Idk. I have a lot of thoughts on this. All i know is i never want to encounter cp or the weird rape/torture/killing fetish’s some dudes online have. i also dont think there should be any spaces for that. if people NEED to draw it for whatever reason (gonna be hard to convince me they NEED to, but) then they need to keep it to themselves. i dont think there needs to be communities built around this because those communities specifically with the dudes is gonna breed people who are even more misogynistic and who feel even more entitled to womens bodies since they have so many other guys around them agreeing with them. and no, not letting them build public communities isnt going to change or fix the problem, but it sure as hell will prevent people from having to encounter that shit and have their trauma be retriggered.
I want to be clear that I dont think this is necessarily what you’re advocating for, im not entirely sure what you think is the best course of action, but it feels like thats what some ppl on here thinks is the best solution, and that attitude worries me so much.
i will say though that i dont think the government, at least the current USA christofash one we live under, should be moderating this stuff, because they’re obviously just gonna ban content they disagree with (but thats a whole other topic). I at the very least distrust any of our current governments moves to censor things.
and i have once comment in regards to this comment:
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obviously ideally we would live in a world where kids aren’t able to access that stuff, but even so, I really do think theres shit that people just shouldnt be posting, because it does effect other adults negatively too, speaking from experience. its not something i know if we can fully moderate but its something i dont think we should just let slide. i also just dont understand why anyone would feel the need to post their rape porn or whatever, anyways.
I think a lot of the issues around this “censorship” thing really falls back into who’s doing the censoring and why. bc while ppl like me might want to be more nuanced about it, the current people who have more power lean more into puritanism and decide all sexual content is bad. It really does feel like an issue of preventing puritanical christian bs from infiltrating our politics, yet again (its always the puritanical christian bs 🙄) and the ppl holding those values having more power and control over the content. idk. i hope this makes sense, ik its kinda all over the place. and im sorry for kneejerk reacting the way I did initially.
Hey, I'm a big time fan of your blog and the circle of blogs similar to it. I love the pro-kink stuff, I love the support of transfun and the general concept that you can vibe with whatever gender and identity you want, I love the positivity, I love bringing attention to trans masc issues.
But I've been seeing some alarming dogwhistles lately. And I've been ignoring them because I really really want to just believe that they were unintentional. But with a recent post you reblogged, I have to ask you something - not out of discourse reasons or to paint you a specific way but because I want to decide what type of people I interact with on tumblr. If you decide to answer my question, please be incredibly clear. I'm not going to hide it behind vague terms like "certain kinks" or "problematic media", I am going to also be incredibly clear.
Do you genuinely believe that if we were in a society where fictional child porn and incest was the norm, that it would have no negative effects on our society as a whole? That media does not represent or change our cultural norms, that fiction can not be used as either propaganda nor as a way to help someone see things in a new light (for better or worse)?
Please be straightforward in your response. Even if it's just a yes or no.
that's a tough question. a quick but unnuanced answer is that I know the meanings behind these when I reblog them, and I do so because I agree with their general messages
the longer answer is... if these things were the norm then people would definitely be interacting with it differently than they do now I think. in some ways they already are somewhat normal, schoolgirl costumes and step-family roleplay come to mind.
ideally, in a world where these fantasies are completely normalized so is education on consent and safety. I don't think there's any real uncomplicated answer to it. but in the world we live in now, as long as things are labeled and not put into spaces where they're inappropriate, there's not really as much harm as some people just feeling uncomfortable
even if these things magically disappeared entirely (which they won't, and as someone with OCD I'd rather have them labeled than out in the wild), they still aren't the source of harm
I said it earlier, but I was groomed with the game tetris. under this framework of media causing harm, where do you go from there? it's a game about blocks, should we ban it and legos too for good measure?
sorry for talking so much when you wanted a short answer, but there's so much nuance here and I like explaining context instead of putting just a little bit of my thoughts out
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shotorozu · 4 years ago
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i feel like im annoying lol but here i am again 🥴
🥴 how do da boys react to a super bimbo mc like shes busty, sweet, innocent, helpful as much as she can be and doesnt really realize when people are hitting on her, she just thinks theyre being extra friendly. (Tamaki, izuku, shoto, denki, bakougo) or any of ur choice
Sorry if I’m being annoying ( •᷄ὤ•᷅)? and tysm
bimbo s/o
character(s) : bakugou katsuki, todoroki shouto, amajiki tamaki (bnha)
probably (?) part one // ?
legend : [Y/N = your name] female! s/o, quirk not specific
headcanon type : fluff, crack (x reader)
note(s) : sooo 🤩 it’s my birthday tomorrow, not excited about that?? not sure! but im definitely gonna post more tomorrow, just because
»»————- ♡ ————-««
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bakugou katsuki
you didn’t seem like his type tbh. you’re kinda an airhead, and you’re sweet and helpful to everyone
and awfully innocent,,
so, you seemed like the person that bakugou would try and stay away from, but nope!
not in this case. i’m not sure what conspired in this explosive blond’s head, but he had a oddly specific attraction to you
he used to hate being around you, but it’s also quite entertaining being around you but why, you may ask?
not only are you super nice, and helpful, but you’re very likable too! which caused you to get secret admirers, and fanboys
but you also so happen to be clueless as fuck, so katsuki would always stick around— obviously very amused, only to tell you what their true intentions are
“what do they mean, go out? like,, outside?”
“no, dumbo. they wanna date you.”
“..like the calendar?”
“hah?? are you dumb?” he actually hated how oblivious you were at first, but he just got used to it
but this clueless airhead trait of yours is what he also hates, because when he developed feelings for you— he’d have to tell you
and,, he’s not the best with being direct with romantic stuff. so— you can see how that went.
he ended up confessing you in the most direct way he could’ve said it, but you still. didn’t. understand.
“fuck sake, i want to be your significant other. your fucking lover, the bitch that’ll be with you until this dumbass brain of yours stops working.”
okay, he was a little too direct, but at least you know his feelings!
when you both finally get together, everyone is shocked. like,, you, the sweetheart that likes helping people— dating thee bakugou katsuki??
everyone thought you were threatened to date him, because you didn’t understand other people’s advances— but in reality, katsuki just told you what he felt
straight from the heart.
also, since you’re also quite busty, katsuki loves sleeping on them— he literally won’t sleep, until he has his head resting on those milkers of yours
“maybe this is all you’re good for, huh? a fuckin’ head rest. there might not be anything up there, but at least it gives me some good fuckin’ sleep.”
he,, doesn’t mean that. you’re useful in so many other ways, but he loves pretending that he thinks that way, because of your replies
“ah, yes! i’m fine with being your head rest, katsuki. rest well, love!”
you’re not hurt, because he makes it a point to tell you multiple times a day that you mean lots to him.
but he gets super mad when people tell you that you’re stupid. because he can only tell you that!!
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todoroki shouto
you also didn’t seem like you’d be his type,, everyone thought he would’ve wanted someone that’s smart as momo, or something similar
but he’s very content with being with you, for reasons he can’t seem to figure out.
he has his habit of watching you help people from afar, and he couldn’t help but smile whenever he engages in conversations with you
yeah sure, you might be more of an airhead than most people— but you have a heart of gold! and that’s what gathered his attention
sometimes, he’s quite clueless to some social cues— but even he can connect the dots
which you can’t seem to do. but you’re in luck! shouto’s usually the one that tells you what they mean
it’s something he loves and hates, only because of how popular you are with people in general.
sometimes, shouto debates if he should even tell you what they mean— because well,, he likes you.
usually, shouto would interpret things to you like this
“,, they like you,, romantically.”
“shou, are you sure? they look like they wanna be my friend!” he lets you call him by his first name, just because of how content you look by calling him ‘shouto’
he ends up whispering something into your ear, and your eyes light up in realization. “oh! so how princess bubblegum likes marceline?”
“,, yeah.”
but being shouto todoroki has it’s advantages. he isn’t afraid of being as direct as he could possibly be.
“may i have the honor of being your lifelong partner?”
“..?”
“oh, romantically. i’d love to be your lover, Y/N.”
“..oh! that’s what you meant.”
the way he sees you stumble with your words, as you pace back in forth— completely flustered by his words
makes him smile
and it all ends well when his friends see that his wallpaper is literally him laying down on your chest
which is something he always wanted to do
“shouto,, did you finally confess?!”
“yes. they said yes.”
they’re not really surprised that you understood, courtesy to shouto’s bluntness.
he is your protector against all of the people that make you seem useless. man literally lashed out when his father asked him to date someone with ‘more intelligence’
“Y/N may not be the definition of being book smart, but Y/N’s not useless!”
in short— he’s the bimbo protector! he’ll always be patient around you, and he would never dare to dumb you down.
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amajiki tamaki
oh lOrd, please help him
you’re so kind, sweet, and helpful. you’d help anyone— regardless of their personality. and that’s what made tamaki interested in you
but you’re also very popular. which he could see why— since you’re attractive in a unique and special way.
tamaki absolutely disliked the idea of your kindness being taken advantaged of. i mean,, the guts of some people!
but he also hated being the one to break the news to you good or bad
he’s not good with the blunt stuff either, and he might’ve been worried about being around you— because well,, you look like you wouldn’t even hurt a fly.
“tamaki, what do they mean by ‘coming home with them for a nice time’ do they.. want to play mario cart with me?”
he looks like he needs to pass out, but he ends up telling you anyway. he’s just lucky that you could hear him.
but he sighs in relief when you end up kindly declining
nejire and mirio are SO amused by this pairing. i mean, it’s an interesting dynamic! how could they not be invested?
yet, they refuse to even explain things to you, especially when tamaki’s around to do said explaining
because apparently, ‘it’ll help you socialize more, especially with Y/N!’
but remember when i said that tamaki wasn’t great with the blunt approach? yeah— he’d have a heart attack, just trying to explain his feelings
“i— uhm how do i say this,, would you like t-to go out for some dinner with m-me?”
“oh sure! i should go tell mirio and nejire” you’d say that with a smile, and it felt like he was going to pass away on the spot.
nejire and mirio were the ones the tell you that ‘no, tamaki doesn’t want to be friendly with you, because he wants to romantically date you.’
and it felt like forever when they were explaining how and why, while tamaki was sitting in the corner.
but thank GOD! because you like him too!
super hesitant on resting on your chest, i mean,, to him, it looked like the nicest pillow for the deepest sleep! but he wasn’t sure if that’d be okay
because no!! to!! taking!! advantage!! of!! Y/N’s!! kindness!!
speaking of that, despite the fact that he’s socially awkward— he will not hesitate on defending you from any haters!
like, when people say that “tamaki and Y/N are such an awkward couple. tamaki’s super awkward, it looks like there’s nothing in Y/N’s brain. maybe she’s brainless”
because how dare they. not everyone is book smart— but that doesn’t give people the right to call you stupid!
“Y/N’s not brainless! she’s kind, helpful, and the sweetest p-person i have ever met. i suggest you take that back!”
in short— it gives him heart palpitations just having to explain things to you, but at the end of the day, it’s all worth it, if he can be with you
»»————- ♡ ————-««
likes and reblogs are appreciated, thanks for reading!
i do not own bnha/mha and it’s characters. boku no hero academia/my hero academia belongs to horikoshi kohei, i only own the writing and i do not profit off of my hobby
do not plagiarize, reupload, translate, or use my works for audio readings without permission
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broadwayandnetflix · 3 years ago
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i have a request for bo burnham!!:) maybe like the reader and bo watch the special when he gets done editing it and doing all the other stuff he has to do for it, and he records her reaction to the whole thing and that’s how he announces the special?? i know that’s weird but it’s been stuck in my head, so you don’t have to do it if you don’t want to!
Test Run - Bo Burnham x Reader
Warnings: Language
Theme: FLUFF (angst if you like squint)
Word Count: 1.6k
A/N: y’all I wrote this so fast, like kachow. I hope you enjoyed it, and got a break from all of the angst. but angst is still good. but this fic is not me fangirling over inside. never, couldn’t be me. I hope you enjoyed the fic though @bos-a-feminist I had sm fun writing it.
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It had been late one evening when Bo had practically burst into the door of your bedroom. You sat puzzled as you gave the man time to catch his breath, as he gave you an eager look.
Trying not to giggle as Bruce yipped at Bo’s feet in pure excitement, it seemed he too was trying to figure out what was going on.
“What? Are we finally gonna have sex again?” you say humorously, causing the man to break composure for just a second.
“No! I mean what the fuck? Yes, yes, and to answer your question, yes. But not right now.”
You giggle as he looks at you with an expression you couldn’t fully decipher. In any constellation, it had been months since you had seen the man this energetic.
Usually, when Bo would come back from his long days in the guest house, he’d tend to be exhausted. Often just giving you a quick kiss before collapsing onto the mattress.
His blue eyes softening towards you as he extends his hand for you to take. Which made you realize that there was an ounce of seriousness in his actions.
Your hands fitting perfectly in his as he pulls you up from the bed, one hand making sure to hold the small of your back.
“Where are we going?” you breathe out.
Bo remained silent, but you found out soon enough as he led you outside to the guest house.
You had stopped dead in your tracks, causing him to do the same. Eyes widening as you realized what was gonna happen, turning to Bo and giving him the biggest grin you could muster.
From the minute he had set foot in the guest house to begin his special, he had been very secretive about it. Something about how it helped him to create something that no one really knew about.
I mean, you had some idea when the UPS trucks kept delivering camera equipment. Or when he had asked if he could take some of your clothes. Other than that, though, top secret.
It had been about roughly a little over a year when he had started the special. A year of emotions and hard work, and by the looks of it.
It seemed as though he had finished.
“Wait are you doing what I think you are doing?” you say, looking at him expectedly.
“Shit babe you catch on quick. Yes, if we are on the same mindset. I think we are, now hush, or I’ll never get to show you it.” Bo instructs before leading you inside.
In all honesty, you didn’t know what to expect. The last time you had seen the guest house had been roughly two years ago. Now? It looked completely different.
Wires and different camera equipment lay waste on the floor, making it almost a hazard. Other lights of various types and sizes filled the room like mini metal trees. It looked disorganized and yet organized at the same time.
Yet Bo walked through the maze of equipment with ease, almost as if it wasn’t even there. You smiled before tiptoeing to the clearing that Bo had made for you.
“Yeah apologies, I wasn’t expecting company.” Bo smirks as you break into laughter.
“It looks…well it looks well used.” you reply, getting comfortable on the chair he had provided.
In front of you sat a projection on the wall of what seemed to be an editing software. You looked back at Bo with an eager grin; he gives you a slight wink.
Anticipation settling in the air as you watched him mess around with the monitor. Until his cursor finally presses on a folder and a video screen pulls up.
You half expected him to sit beside you. Still, instead, he remains behind the computer, amongst his sea of technological instruments and cameras.
“Y/N, I’m showing this to you. Simply because you deserve to see why I’ve been so busy for like a year or more. Plus, you mean the world to me and I wanna know your input.”
Bo says softly. You can detect a hint of nerves in his actions and tone; you practically melt, realizing that was he anxious. Regardless you knew without a shadow of a doubt you were gonna love whatever he puts out.
You open your mouth to reply before he presses play, and an eerie ringing fills the room. Music filling your senses as the special, titled Inside, plays before you.
The next hour or two fills you with a multitude of emotions that you can’t quite place. It seemed like Bo was making you laugh seconds ago, and now you can’t help but feel tears well up in your eyes.
Cinematically it was stunning, breathtaking even. It was hard to believe that Bo had turned the little guest house into a studio. Or at least to the extent that it became, with its gorgeous displays and production.
Performance-wise, it was a completely different ballpark. Bo fucking delivered in more ways than one, whether in humor or just pure raw emotion.
Acting or not, it broke your heart to see the man you loved so dearly in the state that he was in. Of course, you could tell something was up even then when he was filming, but he never gave away the extent of it.
Just hearing him cry made your stomach twist in knots; you wanted to comfort him. Only to be reminded that it was just merely a video of him.
Even at the moment, it took you everything not to look back at Bo; you knew how much he valued your attention. Plus, you wanted to experience the special in full, just as you would if he were on stage.
The special wasn’t the same as his others, but it was well needed for a time like this. It felt personal and introspective, but it was also oh so clever and in-depth. You adored it and the time and effort that he had put into it.
As the credits rolled out and you saw an acknowledgment for your name, your heart soared.
You knew that the two of you had worked hard to be there for each other the past year. Especially with everything that was going on and Bo working most of the time.
To know that you had helped him in any shape or form. It just meant a lot, in more ways than he’d ever know.
The lights in the room flickered on as if he had made a make-shift movie theatre. You wiped away any stray tears, and before he could even say anything, you ran into his arms.
Bo jolting back in surprise before accepting the embrace and holding you tighter into his chest. His head resting gently on top of yours due to his taller stature.
“God I love you so much, more than you’ll ever know. I seriously don’t know if I would’ve made it out alive this past year if I didn’t have you.” he croaked into your hold.
It took you a second to realize that the man was crying, and you pulled away to meet his eyes. Your fingers brushing away his tears before reaching up to give him a kiss.
His figure bending down just a tad to meet your lips as he kisses you back sweetly. It’s light and yet so filled with passion for making up for what time that had been lost.
Yet as he looks down at you, a smile etching across his lips. As he asks you about what your thoughts are on his special, he already knows your response.
Unbeknownst to you, he had recorded your entire viewing experience. Of course, if he were to ever share it anywhere, he’d ask your permission, but it was apparent.
Even as you told him how much you loved it and how much you enjoyed it. You knew that he knew that you understood the special the way he had intended it.
It was one of the many things that made him adore you endlessly. You meant the world to him.
“We should celebrate babe! Maybe order a pizza or something.” you exclaim, arms still wrapped around his neck in your embrace.
“We definitely should, but what pizza places are open at this hour?” Bo smirks as you give him a slight frown.
“I don’t know, that’s a good question.” you hesitate.
“Actually I do know one place that’s really good and delivers.” Bo whispers seductively up against your ear.
You giggle and gesture for him to continue as he swiftly pulls away from your hold. His hand outstretched for you to take once again as he leads you towards the house. Or, more importantly, towards your bedroom.
“Me.”
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Bo sat anxiously beside you as his fingers lingered over the ‘post’ button on his different social media accounts.
The post in question was a video that he stitched together of you watching the special. With your consent, of course.
It had been edited together to be vague enough that he wouldn’t spoil the special. But nonetheless, it was sweet, and he totally made sure to include you tearing up in it.
You made it a priority to tackle him for that one.
The video was sweet and short, but it got the intended message across, and you personally loved it, just like you loved Bo and the special.
“Any-day now Robert.” you tease as you hold his one hand in yours.
“Do you think that they’ll wanna watch it?” he whispers quietly.
“Of course they will, it’s you. Baby you are so talented, your fans will be so excited.” you reassure.
Bo sighs before squeezing your one hand tightly before pressing the button. And letting Inside out into the world.
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ryosmne · 3 years ago
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You're gonna fry your brain.
Hello everyone, since it's finals season and we're all probably really dead inside, I decided to self indulge in some tattoo artist! Sukuna writing, so here's this brainrot that won't let me focus on studying. You can read more of this au in the au masterlist.
I've been trying so hard to finish up a bartender! Dabi fic I have in the works for too long, hopefully I can get around to it too. After finals are done I'll be writing a lot more that's for sure.
Tattoo artist! Sukuna x f!reader
Warnings: language, suggestive tones, that's it.
Finals are by far the worst thing about college, y/n knows that the hard way. She's been stressing herself out for the past few days, maybe weeks, going over the same material again and again. She'd constantly argue that she really needs to pass with an high grade that's why she's so obsessive over it.
Sukuna had tried multiple times to help her ease her nerves, he's been there, although he was the type who never really stuck his nose in a book for too long, regardless, his best girl needed a break, no matter how hard she denied it.
Y/n had declined his invitations of going out, she dropped by the shop a few times, bringing Sukuna some food, but he could tell she was slowly burning herself up.
Today was no different, y/n had been writing everything down all day to help memorize it better. So many hours has passed since she started her study session but she didn't even notice that her clock read 8 pm already.
Sukuna did notice, y/n had been barely responding back to his texts and it was time he took matters into his own hands.
The earpiercing doorbell pulled y/n out of her trance like state, she quickly got up from her desk to go and get rid of whoever just rung it.
"Dollface, I was beginning to think you had died in there."
There was Sukuna, leaning in her doorframe, looking as good as he always did, in a plan white t shirt and a gray pair of sweatpants, holding a few bags and a huge basket.
"not quite, what's all this?"
Y/n motioned to the bags he had.
"Nothing much, just some things I picked up for you, will you let me in? this basket is fucking heavy."
No, the basket wasn't that heavy, Sukuna could carry it just fine, he just wanted to make sure that y/n didn't have a chance to deny him.
Y/n stepped aside to let Sukuna in, and he went straight to her kitchen, dropping his bags on the table.
"Thanks for dropping by babe, but I really need to finish the last three chapters I have left."
"Y/n, you're going to fry your brain at this rate, no more studying for today."
"But-"
"No buts, you won't read another sentence today. We're destressing together."
Turns out, Sukuna had brought over many different things. He's not the type of guy to shy away from anything, so the first thing he did was to grab y/n and drag her into her bathroom.
Sukuna had taken mental notes the first time he looked through y/n's skincare products, he was able to determine her skin type and he went a bit crazy, buying her different things to try out.
"You are insane, that's drunk elephant, why did you get this many things?"
"Because you have the really terrible cheap stuff, now shut up you're going to eat the soap if you keep talking with cleanser all over your face."
Now, y/n's skincare wasn't bad, Sukuna had expensive taste and he's a bit of a brand snob
Sukuna gently poked her cheek with a smile as y/n's face distorted because she had in fact tasted the cleanser and Sukuna could only laugh at her before she flicked some into his mouth too.
"Don't kiss me with a face mask on you brat"
Y/n let out a soft laugh, Sukuna was doing his best to concentrate at the task at hand. Matching y/n's nail polish to his. Y/n had just finished painting his, matte black like he requested but y/n gave him some white polish on his ring finger. Sukuna had argued for a bit, saying it didn't look good and that he didn't like it, but gave in after y/n gave him a puppy face, can you blame him?
"But you look so cute like that."
Y/n complained, knowing that this little comment was going to feed Sukuna's ego more.
"I know doll, but artificial orange doesn't taste as good as it smells."
Y/n once again wasn't wrong, his cocky attitude always creeped in at times, not that she minded.
Time passed fast with watching trash reality shows on y/n's couch, after their very own self care day, Sukuna made sure to fix something they could both eat. Now they were engolved in each others arms, y/n's sleepy eyes staring up at him.
"How are you feeling, doll?"
Sukuna's hand found her hair, gently resting on top of her head.
"Much better, you're the best you know that?"
"I've heard it once or twice, I'll give you reasons to say it more often"
He gave her a gentle smile, leaning closer to steal a kiss, a little more intimate than the ones they shared earlier.
" 'Kuna, I'm sorry I was so stressed and distant this week, I probably worried you-"
"Don't be stupid, it's ok, I just want you to know I'm here for you, and it's just finals. You're a smart cookie, I'm sure you'll do great."
Y/n found his words reassuring and nuzzled closer to him, letting her lungs burn with his scent that never got less intoxicating.
"Thank you 'kuna, what would I do without you?"
The last few words came out slurred, but Sukuna understood everything, y/n's breathing got steadier against him.
"I don't know doll I'm just glad to have you here, I promised to take good care of you."
And just like that, y/n was fast asleep next to him, he didn't mind her uncomfortable couch one bit all he cared about was how at peace she looked. Maybe he would move her to her bed later, he couldn't bring himself to do it now.
The next morning, y/n found herself on her bed, Sukuna had almost woken her up getting ready before he left to go to work, but he managed to put her right back to sleep with a kiss on the forehead and a light "don't wake up yet doll".
Y/n made her way to the kitchen, Sukuna usually left a little letter for her on the nightstand by the bed, he must've been in a rush today.
Not quite the case.
Sukuna not only made her, her favourite breakfast, he also left post it notes in some places.
You suck at food shopping, thank me later.
Was written on her fridge.
So that's what all the bags were for, y/n didn't find out last night because of how tired she was, and how much fun she had being around sukuna.
He had filled up her fridge with everything she ever needed to make a meal for herself or have a snack. Let's be honest Sukuna just wanted to cook for her again.
Another post it was found in her bathroom cabinet.
You're probably gonna get mad at me for this but I'm not sorry, you deserve it.
The poor cabinet was stuffed to the brim with brand name skincare that made anyone's wallet scream in anguish and a lot of bathbombs. Upon closer look y/n almost cried at how attentive Sukuna was, he took extra care to look out for her skins needs.
Y/n found the last post it on her desk while she did her revision.
Don't overwork yourself doll, you've got me for that.
Y/n brought Sukuna cupcakes from seven different bakeries to try that day.
Bonus Domain shenanigans: "Sukuna left early again?"
Megumi asked, the day had been going pretty slow he wasn't surprised his friend dipped.
"Yeah, he left this behind though."
Geto held up a very nice looking white shop bag, a slight glimmer in his eye let the rest of his friends know he planned something.
"So? What's in it anyways?"
Gojo was resting his chin on his hand, blank expression on his face, completely unamused by Geto's discovery.
"Give me that"
Nanami swiftly snatched the bag, curious to see what was inside of it. He reached in and retrieved several wrapped round objects.
"Bathbombs?"
He questioned puzzled, but then his lips tugged upward.
Megumi, Nanami, Gojo and Geto, each got two bathbombs, and even though they would outright say it, they were pretty damn exited to drop them in their bathtubs. That's what Sukuna gets for avoiding clean up.
Sukuna entered the shop barely greeting anyone and begun looking around. Fuck he was looking for something, everyone tried to keep their composure.
"Have you seen a white bag?"
He finally looked at the group of men before him.
"like a backpack? No "
Megumi spoke, Sukuna begun thinking he was remembering everything wrong, that's untill he saw something sticking out of Geto's pocket. That's for sure a bathbomb he bought for y/n
"You motherfuckers, how low can you stoop to steal my girls bathbombs?"
Hey it's me again, though I'd add that here, if you have specific skin demands I tried to cover that in here so everyone can enjoy it, I have lots of allergies and skin concerns so I'm kinda sensitive to that stuff. Hope you had fun reading, remember to take it easy, untill next time :>
Tag list: (comment or message me and I’ll gladly add you)
@artist4theworld @skatercashew
@divineteaty
@in-inception
@not-another-ackerman
@jjk-is-my-shit @ilovemarvel99
@thegaymadafakkasworld @readinghassavedmylife @ruler-of-the-skies
@bluebananasssss
@ghost-of-todoroki
@sabsaocit
@heaveus
@jackysenpaii @rebenok-zimnayaya
@aam1na @sore-eyes@ryan249057 @goobygoobster @charlie-xo @kamisamaundercover
@shadoweepingscream
@sunfloweroranges
@haleypearce
@crapimahuman
@fiona782
@levi-ships-eruri
@chocolatecake764
@stupid-simp33 @ciphersighs
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frienderbender · 2 years ago
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Kikkin’ It with Kixx
The long-awaited(?) post where I talk about the specifics of the Kikkin’ It Rehab Center. This includes technical things like costs and credentials, as well as what I feel is implied about the actual rehabilitation techniques (as well as some stuff I’ve just kinda extrapolated from it). General note: yes, Rikki is my fave character but I do not agree with everything I talk about here. I feel like that’d be obvious but I’m just gonna cover my bases. Rikki is a terrible sobriety spokesperson.
With that outta the way, let’s get into it:
This first part is copied from old notes from another doc I made months ago; this is more technical stuff (costs, staff, etc.):
Opening a rehab center in California is costly. Obviously. In general, it can run anywhere from 100K to 2mil. Considering that the Kikkin’ It Rehab Center is implied to be a more high-end, celebrity rehab center, this ups the cost even more. At the very least, I’d say Rikki dropped a good 1.5 to 2.5 mil on this from the start. He definitely had the money to do so, though I like to think Nikki helped him with the costs as well. 
Again, since this is implied to be a celebrity rehab center, I’d imagine the actual price to stay there is anywhere from 10k to 30k a month. Also, because it’s so exclusive, I don’t think the center takes in more than probably around 30 people at a time. 
It’s never stated “officially” how many rehab centers there are. I think there’s probably only the one in Los Angeles, but there are smaller buildings they own that are used as meeting centers (the large main building is for housing and amenities). Specifically I think the building that we see Rikki holding that meeting in that Rockzo speaks at used to be a club owned by Rikki. But I’ll save the headcanon elaboration for my webcomic >:]
A fun fact: technically you don’t really need any special license to open a rehab center in California. You don’t need special credentials as long as you have a staff (licensed therapists, counselors, nurses, etc). With that in mind, I doubt Rikki has any sort of qualifications and instead just has a staff that runs things for him. I do think he helped write the basic guidelines of their practices, though, because his name is plastered all over this place. He owns it, he can do what he wants. And it explains a lot about himself when you actually listen to what’s being said. But more on that in a minute.
And to make that last part clearer, I think while he doesn’t have any sort of license, he is still absolutely leading the meetings and all that.
As far as the actual practices go, I’m basing what I imagine his general rehabilitation model is like on both more religion-oriented Alcoholics Anonymous/12-Step principles (worth noting that though AA was founded by a Christian group, it is non-denominational, though some groups do have a more overt religious edge to them), as well as the beliefs of famous celebrity rehab centers, specifically the infamous Passages Malibu.
I do think he uses a spiritual edge to his work because preying on people’s spirituality is a very easy way to get people to do what you want. With that in mind, regardless of what he may actually believe, I think the Kikkin’ It Rehab Center works based on the mindset that alcoholism is not a disease and rather a moral failing (which, in my opinion, is complete bullshit but that’s besides the point). I have a very long headcanon about Rikki and his relationship with faith which could be its own separate tangent but to sum up: I think he was raised very strictly Catholic and has a complicated relationship with religion as an adult. That said, he knows the power one can have if they can use religion as a means of manipulation, so he uses it in his rehab. 
In general, though, I think it follows a pretty basic 12 step program when you get right down to it.
So, back to what I was talking about a minute ago with the guidelines/practices of this place. Have you ever actually listened to what’s being said? Rikki claims that the key to getting sober is identifying the problem, no denying that. But what’s really striking is what Rockzo says at the meeting before Sobertown. 
Rockzo: “I have clarity now, and that’s an amazing thing, I tell you. The key to getting clean is killing that part of you that was hurting you. You gotta kill that part of yourself.”
So like. Do we see the implications of this? Rikki is straight up telling his clients that they have to kill parts of themselves in order to even begin to get sober; again, going back to my point that the Kikkin’ It Rehab Center goes by the “addiction is a moral failing” principle. And if you’re wondering how that applies to Snakes n’ Barrels: Pickles was identified as the problem, so in order to “kill” the thing that was holding them back, they did the next best thing: issued a restraining order and reunited without him. 
This is partly gonna turn into a Rikki analysis, which is inevitable with me, but I do think this idea of having to effectively “kill” parts of yourself says a lot about Rikki as a person. We know from watching him in the episode that he is so incredibly miserable, and that’s part of his motivation (“Because if I have to be sober, then I’ll make everybody sober, and they’ll have to live in the hell on Earth that I do.”) for running a rehab center at all. And when you think about it in this context, it makes perfect sense he feels this way. If he’s not only promoting a way of “healing” that includes talks of killing parts of yourself, but also actively trying to make his clients and the world around him feel as terrible as possible…yeah of course he’s miserable? I think this mindset is definitely reflective of some personal feelings on his own self, that he can really no longer recognize himself because that part of him is “dead.” He was his own worst problem.
I hope this makes some stuff a bit clearer about Rikki and why I definitely characterize his sobriety as being more of a genuine downward spiral than like. A new, healing chapter of his life. Yes, he absolutely needs to be sober if he was drinking so much that he has a severely damaged liver before 40, but I think his own personal ways of trying to make himself better were already poisoned from the start, so it made this journey to being clean more of like. A destruction of his own identity. This goes back to a lot of my own characterizations of Rikki (pre- and post- sobriety) where I think he gets a lot of his self-worth based on what others think of him. So in his mind it’s like. Oh people don’t like Rikki the rockstar anymore?? Ok he’s dead now. Do they like Rikki the SOBER rockstar?? They do???? Great, I’ll do anything to keep that perception of me in their heads. 
idk man. Rikki is my fave but dude he makes me so sad sometimes.
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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 3 years ago
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hi yes im still alive
DON’T MIND ME, I’M JUST--
HAVING A MOMENT TO PROCESS ALL THE LORE AND STORY CHAPTER 6 JUST DROPPED ON US, I CAN BARELY WRITE
AHHHHHHH, I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS 😭 kjdbbaufbiafafvoaybo LEMME PUT ON MY THINKING CAP AND THROW SOME STUFF OUT ASDYUBUASDLI;AGVUOQIB;VI You’ll understand why I used Leona’s face here even though it’s Idia and Ortho’s chapter after you read my thoughts--
***Chapter 6 (and other main story) spoilers below the cut!***
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Okay, just to keep it simple, I’ll try to keep things in chronological order!
First is a bullet point list of my thoughts on chapter 6 so far, then all my questions and theories (mostly a biggish theory on Ace) are at the end of the post.
Expectation: Idia cowering in his room, Vil and Rook busting down his door using Epel as a battering ram, dead Ortho theory confirmed
Reality: SWAT TEAM RAID ON NRC, DORM LEADERS (sans Kalim) AND JAMIL GET KIDNAPPED
Admittedly, I’m disappointed to see that the injury Grim inflicted to MC was basically just a cat scratch and nothing more. I thought it would be a lot more impactful if MC had to deal with juggling the realization that Grim has betrayed their friendship and trust while also on the verge of death (or at least while being severely injured)... And given how MC reacted to the attack at the end of chapter 5, I would think whatever struck them was much more substantial than just a cat scratch. I’m going to go out on a limb here and say either the script got scrubbed by Disney, or the intent was that MC was still woozy from VDC / OB Vil, MC felt so betrayed that it shook them emotionally, or that MC was just that weak by default that they can’t defend themselves against cat claws.
Hey, Ramshackle’s finally getting renovated! Proceeds to immediately get destroyed again--
I feel like????????? They tried to retroactively explain why Neige won to try and mitigate the uproar over how VDC ended. There’s some dialogue between the VDC group about how they didn’t perform at their peak because of having just walked out of dealing with OB Vil, and how Neige’s fans were going to vote for him anyway because they resonated with his background. Honestly, I think they should have moved on from that sore spot instead of bringing it up again, even if how chapter 5 ended didn’t personally bother me.
BOOM, HERE COME THE TWST TERMINATORS--
NOT GONNA LIE, THOSE STYX GUYS LOOK HOT SO COOL
AAAAAAND IT’S KIDNAPPING MONTAGE TIME, KIDS
JOABSFHUPAUABDBADB CALM DOWN, RIDDLE??????? YOU’RE GOING TO COMMIT ARSON IN BROAD DAYLIGHT--
Okay, I know this chapter’s focused on Ignihyde and Grim, but the standout part to me (so far) has been the scene where Leona’s being kidnapped. Historically, Leona has not been a character that I like (excluding that one time I had to pretend to like him for a game). I feel like he’s one massive missed opportunity (he didn’t show up much in chapter 2, he’s pretty similar backstory-wise to his Disney counterpart compared to the other Dorm Leaders, he didn’t seem to learn anything or become a better person even a LITTLE after chapter 2, etc.). I’m not a fan of his lazy and arrogant attitude either (even if it is justified by his backstory). But here? THIS IS THE LEONA I ACTUALLY LIKE AND WANT TO SEE MORE OF. 
LIKE????? I CAN’T DESCRIBE TO YOU HOW MUCH I LIKE THIS SCENE???? Yeah, we have Leona fighting STYX at first, but as soon as he realizes who they are, he wises up and surrenders because he knows better than to resist arrest. AND NOT ONLY THAT, but he uses King’s Roar in a smart way--to turn the falling greenhouse glass panes into sand so they don’t hurt anyone nearby (namely him and Ruggie).
And after he turns himself in????? LEONA TELLS RUGGIE TO TAKE CARE OF SAVANACLAW FOR HIM!!! THIS is what a real leader would do. He looks after himself and his people, but he knows when to surrender, AND he leaves his “kingdom” (the dorm) in good hands while he’s away. THIS is the Leona I want to see.
AJBDUASHPFBUABFIABIYFBIPFAAFIAF I ALSO REALLY LIKE HIS SASS WHEN HE JUST THROWS HIS HANDS UP AND ASDBIASBIABAIODDAYOFAIPPADAIDB SAYS “I’ll go with you, but be careful while escorting me, okay? Despite my looks, I'm a precious prince. I’ll get sick/dizzy if you drive recklessly.” SARCASTIC SASSY SMARTASS??????? IF YOU HAD MORE LINES LIKE THIS, I’D LIKE YOU MORE
I love how Azul’s still talking about capitalism/how he can profit from Idia (apparently the Shrouds are like the TWST equivalent of Google??????) as he’s being escorted away by the agents?????? IF I WERE HIM, I’D BE PISSED OFF THAT THEY INTERRUPTED MY BOARD GAME????? At least let the man finish first--
Damn, everyone’s being tasered???????? And apparently all the STYX agents are equipped with anti-magic plates? I guess Bind the Heart can just eat shit then--
Lilia’s ringtone is cute, period.
CROWLEY CALLED STYX TO CAPTURE GRIM???? GRIM IS OFFICIALLY A SCP THAT NEEDS TO BE CONTAINED????
WAIT WHAT CROWLEY’S BEING KIDNAPPED TOO??????? Oh well, the school is probably safer in Trein’s hands anyway--
askhlbfbilhidbabbidasb RIDDLE WAKES UP POST KIDNAPPING AND HE’S USING LEONA AS A LAP PILLOW?????!
How does it feel to be held in a room against your will, Jamil? Yeah, don’t like a taste of your own medicine, do you?
OH HI IDIA, NICE YZMA MAD SCIENTIST GETUP YOU GOT THERE
Wait, what????? THAT’S IT?????? SERIOUSLY???????
MAN.
I have so many questions??????? Specifically about STYX and what they do, and how the Shrouds are tied into all of it.
So they say STYX is a specialized unit called in to quell serious Overblot cases. And if Crowley called them to deal with Grim... well, bad times ahead for Grim. STYX has also been studying Overblot for a long time, which is why (I think?) they captured Riddle, Leona, Azul, Jamil, and Vil. 
There’s been some allusions made between Grim and Stitch in a lot of fan art and fan theories I’ve seen, since their struggles have some parallels: that being them struggling to decide if they are “good” or “bad”. I don’t know if this was intentional on the part of the TWST writing team, but regardless, it’s a really good concept that plays into the themes of TWST itself. There’s no good, there’s no evil, no black and white--most of the characters we see may be BASED on villains, but that doesn’t MAKE them villains. They are good, and bad, in their own ways--and now Grim is dealing with that crisis as he fights to keep his sanity and avoid completely succumbing to Overblot.
Though Idia seems to be involved with STYX’s research, it doesn’t sound like he personally gave the order to retrieve those test subjects (or at the very least, he’s not happy about roughing up the test subjects), it sounds like the orders came from other people in the organization. His parents, perhaps?
They mention briefly that Idia’s parents are asking him to “come home”, so it must be for something urgent. Are they worried about his safety? But Idia’s lines at the end of chapter 5 lead me to think he is estranged from his family, since he straight up rejected a job offer linked to them (Olympus Corp is owned by the Jupiter family, and the Shrouds are a branch family of Jupier), and says something like “I’m not welcome anywhere”. Has Idia done something to disgrace him from the rest of the family? Or is it more of a self imposed/self inflicted statement, given that he always says he’s “cursed” and acts like he’s guilty of something that deserves scorn?
Why is Idia participating in STYX research, even if it means experimenting on his fellow students (and fellow board game enthusiast Azul)? People are speculating that he wants to use blots to fully revive Ortho (if dead Ortho theory is true), or that Idia actually has heroic intentions (he wants to know more about blots to prevent OBing from happening?), but at this point??? Literally anything could happen?!
In future parts, I’m guessing Pomefiore, MC, and Adeuce will team up to break Jamil and the Dorm Leaders (except Malleus, Malleus got left out again www) out? And HOPEFULLY we get to see Rook’s Unique Magic or at least more screen time, since I feel like he got so little in chapter 5... Another thing I’d like to see is Ace and/or Epel getting their Unique Magic, or at least starting to develop it. It’s really mostly Ace I want more details for.
A theory I’ve been holding onto for a long time is that Deuce getting his UM will spur Ace on to become jealous (since he has always seen Deuce as an idiot/”lesser” than him), and that will cause a rift in the friendship, or for Ace to throw himself into a dangerous situation to prove himself (he has done it before with Riddle)... and has his ass rescued again. This would make Ace even angrier, since he feels like everyone is treating him like a little kid or rubbing it in that he isn’t “as good” as they are. I don’t know where it would go from there (I’m sure TWST would get creative), but ultimately it would culminate in Ace making amends with everyone and rushing in to save them from either Grim or Idia OB.
I don’t think Ace would discover his UM in a similar manner as Deuce (Deuce had to embrace his own stubbornness and straightforwardness, but as the term “Unique” Magic implies, the way a magic develops and manifests is “unique” to the user). While Deuce has to learn to accept his own way of thinking, I believe Ace is already sure of his own way of thinking and has totally accepted it. I think what Ace has to deal with instead is coming to terms with his fickleness. We’ve seen him time and time again treating his loved ones kind of callously, from constantly bullying MC, Grim, and Deuce to ghosting his own girlfriend and flaking on people when they are counting on him to do a task.
The issue with Ace isn’t that he isn’t aware, it’s that he is aware and he seems to think this behavior is totally okay. He demonstrates little to no remorse in what he does and says, and he doesn’t seem to care about the consequences either (how many times does he get punished by Riddle, yet he keeps doing the same dumb things over and over?). Ace appears to operate under the mindset of always being in the right, or (if he’s in the wrong), he won’t really acknowledge it, or he will wave it off as “no big deal”--and I think that’s his greatest weakness.
In the scenario I described earlier, I mentioned that Ace’s jealousy will cause a wedge between him and his friends, and I think this will play into him realizing the error of his ways. When he has finally driven away all of the people that supported him, what will he have left? Nothing. Then maybe Ace suddenly finds himself relating to Idia, or to Grim, who have Overblotted and are in a similar emotional state as he is. Confused and lonely... and that energizes him to pitch in again, even if all he has is wind magic up his sleeve. Everyone could be shocked that Ace has returned, and in that moment, he could finally realize his true potential and unlock his Unique Magic!
(Maybe that’s too specific, but that’s a scenario that I’ve had playing in my head for a long time!)
... Buuuuut given that Ace has gotten little to no spotlight so far in chapter 6, I’m not sure if they’ll lean into him developing his UM yet (unless they pull a chapter 5 and really start addressing Ace in the latter half of the chapter like they did with Deuce). Seeing as chapter 6 is dealing with a lot of heavy topics (death, Grim lore, Overblot lore), I’m thinking maybe the TWST team will push off Ace’s UM development to chapter 7???? The only way I can see it happening in chapter 6 is if the chapter is SUPER long, or if the writing is REALLY good or really bad. 
Anyway, I’m keeping my fingers crossed!!! I’m so excited for the rest of chapter 6... I hope that we don’t have to wait too long for it!
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blueprint-han · 4 years ago
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[Image ID: A black picture with the title “HOW TO SUPPORT FANFICTION AUTHORS” written in bold caps lock, colored with a winter forest picture. End ID.]
Well, this post has been made countless times, but I’m making one too because I’ve seen a lot of people say they’re new to tumblr and don’t know the whole “reblogging is better than liking” rule and other stuff. So without any further ado, here are ways YOU can support the fanfiction authors. Now keep in mind this applies to almost every author out there, not just the stayblr fandom, so if you’re a silent reader (or even if you aren’t), I advise you go through this post. Warning, this is a fairly long post going into detail, so yeah. I still expect you, the readers to read this, and if you’re a writer, feel free to lmk if i’ve written smth wrong or if you want me to add something! ^^
In this post I’ll go into thorough analysis of the pros and cons of each of the methods listed here and how YOU as a reader can show the authors whose fics you read more love and motivate them to produce content.
WARNING; LONG POST! GOES INTO A DECENT AMOUNT OF DETAIL. NOT EDITED, EXCUSE ANY TYPOS.
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#1 : LIKING !
I think this is basic common knowledge, and a lot of people tend to do this. When you like the post, the author sees it, you see it, and if the author has their liked posts accessible (which majority of the time they don’t), and if someone deliberately goes to check it, then they see it. See why so many authors say just liking does nothing? Only liking says “Hey, I’m gonna tell you your story is not that good by simply liking it and not sharing it with other people. :D”
♯ PROS:
You’re telling the author that you've read their fic, and either you’ve enjoyed it to a certain extent, or you’re just saving it to read for later.
Likes are seen by you, the author and anyone who has access to your likes (which, most people don’t).
♯ CONS:
If you ONLY like, you’re not really helping the author’s work reach a wide audience because this site isn’t Instagram. Reblogging is the only way people can SEE our works. I’ll cover more on that in the next section.
In a nutshell, liking is good! But you should most likely use it in a combination with the other stuff I’ve listed below, because just the like itself doesn’t really do much in giving the author any feedback or interaction on their fics.
To clear shit up; I’m not talking about those people who don’t read the story or appreciate it in the first place. I’m talking about those who appreciate the fic, like it, but don’t leave any sort of feedback to show that.
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#2 : REBLOGGING !
This is SO, SO important. I cannot stress on this enough. Let me explain WHY so many writers stress on reblogging content: 
Tumblr’s tag system is inherently fucked up, and has grown more so over the year. I’m not kidding, at first, the fic either used to show up in the tags or it didn’t, but now, sometimes your fic can be REMOVED from the tags because of,,, idk tumblr tag shit. Anyways, as you can see, it’s very demotivating for authors at that point, because the major way for people to find their content and expand their blogs has been blocked.  
Due to this reason, tumblr authors need to RELY on you, their followers to help spread their works to a wider audience. Now again, before you get me wrong, I’m not saying you ae forced to rb our works regardless of whether you like them or not. BUT, that being said, if you DO infact like the story, there’s no harm in reblogging, right? By doing this you’re indirectly telling the author — “hey! :D I liked your fic! Which is why I am gonna share it to my followers so they can read it too :D” Trust me, you’re doing nothing but helping the people who produce content for you to read. Seems like a worthy cause to hit the reblog button, right? It’s only a one, or maximum two step procedure.
Leave tags in your reblogs! Trust me, as an author myself and as much as I know from all my author friends, we oft check the tags of your reblogs to see if you found any part amazing or even if you have anything to say about the writing we put so much hard work into. Even a key smash or a “This was so [insert adjective] 🥺” is enough to leave a smile on your authors face. 
♯ PROS :
You’re !! Sharing !! Your authors !! Works !! This leads to them getting more recognition, so for the content they’re so graciously providing for free, you’re promoting their blog and helping them expand it.
If the tags are being a shit, which majority of the time they are, then you’re literally making an author’s day by reblogging! You’re showing them that you, a follower and appreciator of their works are willingly sharing their content because it deserves to be seen by more people. Again before any dumb people decide to attack me, i am talking about people who like the fic but don't bother reblogging and are silent/ghost readers. I am not forcing anyone to read anybody’s work.
YOU’RE MAKING YOUR AUTHOR SO HAPPY WHAT MORE REASONS COULD YOU POSSIBLY WANT !! 🥺
♯ CONS :
Literally none, because as far as I remember no author is against reblogging of their works. It’s quite literally the way this platform functions. Reblogging is IMPORTANT.
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#3 : COMMENTING/SENDING FEEDBACK !
This kind of overlaps with the previous section, but THIS IS SUCH AN IMPORTANT STEP !! When you leave feedback, you are directly giving the author something so much more valuable to them than high follower/note counts or money. Your feedback is literally our serotonin. I kid you not the number of times I’ve received a positive comment and smiled and it has made my day. There’s a reason youtubers (though not the best example, bear with me here because it was the only one I could think of) ask people to subscribe, like and COMMENT. The subscription is like a follow, the like is ofc like a heart, and the comment is equivalent to an rb with comments in the tags. 
You might argue and tell me that a comment is basically like an ask so the reblogging step isn’t necessary, but I’m sure 99% of you use YouTube and you know that more comments leads to people’s videos boosted in the stream/trending charts. This is what reblogging does. Reblogging shares the piece with other people like minded, which leads to a boost in reads. You are literally helping your author grow.
It’s quite literally the same thing as youtubers. Youtubers NEED validation to keep their content creation going, so do writers, so do other ccs on this site. This post is however, focused on WRITERS, so keep that in mind.
♯ PROS :
By doing this, you’re giving author valuable feedback! It’s similar to what you do in rbing with tags. Interactivity with their fics boosts their note counts and helps expand their audience, so srsly, now think of it: your one comment is playing such a massive role to help ccs create more content.
Imagine how much of a difference the note counts will be in when every person who simply likes after reading the fic, reblogs, leaves a comment and sends an ask. the note counts would be high on each and every fic, which is validation in itself, but your comments would inspire the writer so much more! Please, don’t skip the commenting part. Even a simple one like: “this is so cute!” is wonderful. 
♯ CONS :
Remember, if you’re gonna give constructive criticism (which I’m sure you all are smart enough to know if different from hate), make sure the author is okay with it. Authors need to be in a specific mindset and must be ready to accept criticism, so if you’re gonna give constructive criticism to them when they’re at a low point, it may demotivate them.
Just commenting, instead of reblogging and commenting in the tags/ reblogging and then leaving an ask in their inbox, while it gives validation in plenty, will not lead to the author’s work being spread. Therefore I suggest either reblogging and commenting in the tags or reblog and then leave an ask, or comment under the fic!
!! reminder; I am not saying that if you don’t rb and just leave feedback, your feedback has no value. We authors truly appreciate every bit of feedback, but this post is aimed to help you learn how to interact with and support authors, and make them feel more motivated, because the current scenario of liking and scrolling is taking a toll on their creative abilities. Take it from a person who’s been writing for a year.
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#4 : COMMSIONING VIA THEIR KO-FI/OTHER APPS !
Before any of you attack me, let me tell you that this is not a step that is 100% necessary to do. ONLY donate if you can and if you genuinely want to, and if anyone is forcing you to pay for something against your will, you need to get yourself out of there.
Regardless, if an author has a kofi and you’re able to and you want to donate, you definitely should! It’s also a valid form of support.
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#5 : ADDING THEM ON REC LISTS/ RECOMMENDING THEM TO REC BLOGS
This is such an underrated option, to be honest. I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve seen my fic was recommended onto some rec list and it’s made me smile so hard. If you like some fics, create a rec list! They’re oft very popular amongst the fans too. Making rec posts is such a great way to share your favorite stories with others. 
Rec blogs! I’ve seen a couple going around, and needless to say they are a great way to get someone else to read your favorite author’s work whilst also giving them your own feedback. These blogs oft accept recs via a form or ask box, and they leave your feedback along with their own, or else they’ll oft tag the author in the feedback post, so look! You’re basically helping your author share their fic to many more people, because you’ve given them feedback and a reblog.
♯ PROS :
Validation! Feedback! Reblogs! More exposure! Helping a blog grow! Spreading love! basically a run down of the stuff I’ve said before!
♯ CONS :
Literally no con of this. Unless, a one in a million case, this author says they don’t like receiving feedback/being tagged, and I’m sure NO person has said this before, at least none that I’ve heard of.
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#6 : FINAL COMMENTS; MISC !
When an author points out about how the interactivity is drastically reducing, don’t just give them blind apologies. Yes, you feel sorry for not interacting as much, we understand, but rather show that you’ll become a better content consumer through your actions. We need to see that we’re not just throwing words into a void and that people are actually trying to be better content consumers. 
Understand the fact that authors don’t get paid for this, and 99% of the time, these authors don’t take commissions either. They’re giving you novel worthy writings for free. Take Percy Jackson: You think the author would have felt motivated to write the subsequent parts, let alone two whole series based off of it if literally no one showed that they were interested? Rick Riordan has sales, he is being paid, there are millions of people and big agencies who provide him feedback. Now take that huge amount and simmer it down to an audience of maybe 10000 people This is what fanfic authors want. They don’t want your money, nor are they telling you to risk your lives for them. All they want is, a reblog, some tags, some feedback, some INTERACTIVITY.  A sign that they aren’t throwing fics into the void and that people actually like them, some motivation to continue. Seems fairly easy to throw an rb with some tags, right?
Don’t bother to tell me that we do this for ourselves and we shouldn’t ask for likes and reblogs and feedback, because 1) you are consuming the content that we “write for ourselves” and 2) writers post their content here for interactivity and feedback. We could just not post and write and save our fics in our dungeon drafts for years. But we choose to post to entertain the readers, the consumers. And we aren’t even asking that much in return.
Don’t give me the whole “I’m scared that authors feel that comments are annoying” excuse either because seriously this has been DEBUNKED SO MANY TIMES. Istg, in the nicest way possible, if you still think writers are annoyed by interaction and feedback, after so many posts, long rants have been posted as to how we’re not, then you must truly be living under a rock. There, I said it. Please stop thinking this way, I’ll say it again, AUTHORS ARE NOT ANNOYED OF FEEDBACK, COMMENTS, TAGS, REBLOGS. WE LOVE IT. Saying this is like saying that the audience in a theatre play shouldn’t clap when the play ends because the actors would find it noisy. 🤡
I’ve seen some people saying they have anxiety issues and such, so pls note that I’m not invalidating your condition. If you’re trying to be more interactive, I really appreciate it! If you can’t, that’s fine too. You’re trying.
But for the people who have no reason other than feeling lazy to rb and comment, your lack of interactiveness is not excused. Please. Tumblr is a reblogging site. If you’re gonna consume content like authors are some sort of machines, I encourage you to go get some more perspective.
This site is not Instagram or the satan bird app. Your likes are appreciated but frankly speaking, they do nothing to the author except tell them “Hey i read ur fic but i'm not gonna support u :D” and honestly, that is detrimental to their creative capabilities and mental health. 
DON’T FOLLOW AN ACC JUST TO MINDLESS RB THEIR SIGNAL BOOST POSTS AND THEIR REBLOGS OF GIFS AND NOT INTERACT WITH THEIR WRITING AT ALL ! Trust me, authors prefer a lower amount of interactive followers than a high count that doesn’t even give them any feedback. Again your follows are appreciated, but when you’re following, you know the type of content the author creates, so the author expects that the more followers, the more interactivity. These days, this is just becoming the opposite. So don’t do it! If you’re gonna follow to read, interact with their works. I promise, this will make both you and the author happy. A win-win situation.
In conclusion: SUPPORT YOUR FUCKING AUTHORS! THEY ARE NOT MACHINES THAT HAVE NO FEELINGS TO PRODUCE CONTENT FOR YOU! FICS TAKE DAYS AND DAYS OF PLANNING, PLOTTING, OUTLINING, WRITING, EDITING, MAKING TEASERS. SO JUST SHOW THEM YOU APPRECIATE THEM WITH AN RB. IT’S THE L E A S T YOU CAN DO.
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I will be liking this post here written by the lovely @chaninfused​ and @scriptura-delirus​ . Please take time to read it because if you weren’t convinced by my arguments, you will see how much frustration we as writers face on a daily basis. Please, just show support. Here is the post by @stayndays​ about how to get more people to read your work, because it also has a note on reblogging. Please educate yourself, and put an end to this mindless consuming culutre and bring up some interactivity.
If you’ve read this far, I want you to go to two of your favorite authors and leave some feedback in their inbox, and tag me in it (either tag me yourself or ask the author to do so, they won’t mind). Show your writers that our words are taking effect and you are becoming better consumers. I mean it. I’m serious. I want every single one who reads this post to do this. besides valid reasons, if you’re lazy to do this, you’re a part of the problem. PLEASE get more perspective.
Also, feel free to add to this post! I’d love to read your thoughts too, remember to be kind though. And, if I think your rb is somehow contradicting my points and is bringing down the reason I made this post, I will politely ask you to delete your comment, because this post is about being truthful about the harsh reality of tumblr consumers and how we can change it. I’m sure none of you will let it get to that point, though. <3 love you guys. 💓
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And, just a reminder, don’t just blindly like this too. Do what I said before, and while I am not forcing you, I’d appreciate your reblog, because seriously, it took me 3 whole days to write this, plus, I’m sure this will help more of your followers understand the fault in consumer culture. haha, that’s it! This post was way too long uff.
also, this is ur cue to not be stupid in my inbox. You have something to say? Think I worded smth wrongly? I’m sure it wasn’t my intention to do so, point it out with manners. 
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mercy-burning · 4 years ago
Text
Hangover Duty
Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!Reader Summary: Reader’s birthday party leads to some rather endearing drunk antics. Category: Fluff Warnings: Mild language, alcohol consumption, mentions of the prison arc (is that a proper content warning? idk lol) (As always, if there’s anything I missed, please let me know what I should include in content warnings! I always want to be as mindful as I can about what I post. Thank you!) Word Count: 4.4k
MASTERLIST
NOTE: Funny story, I woke up at like 3 in the morning last night and just sat up and cranked this out in one go, unprompted. I’m not sure why inspiration struck that late (early?) but I’m rather proud of this one considering I just woke up to edit it a few hours ago 😂, I hope you like it!
***
Watching her gradually get more drunk as the night went on had to be the most amusing and incredibly endearing way to get back into the groove of things. It was nice, actually, being able to have a good time with his friends without constantly being reminded of what's happened in the past year.
Especially considering this year Spencer was determined not to miss Y/N's birthday. Last year he'd been in prison, and rather than being able to celebrate with her and their friends, rather than getting her a card or writing her a letter, she'd written him a letter that detailed in depth how she refused to celebrate until her best friend was there to celebrate with them. Of course he felt awful about the whole thing, and when JJ had dropped off the letters that week, he made her tell Y/N how sorry he was and how he wished more than anything that he could have been there.
And naturally, after dealing with Cat another time and settling his mom down, the first chance he got, he told Y/N himself.
She was in the hospital after that incident with Mr. Scratch. She was the first person he saw in the hospital, and she was fine, arguing with the doctors about leaving to help her team. But once he showed up, telling the doctors he could get her to sit down, they left, and he pulled her in for the biggest hug they'd ever shared.
And the first thing he told her was, "I'm sorry I missed your birthday."
She'd only laughed and squeezed him tighter, replying with a short, yet simple, "Shut up."
He promised to himself then that no matter what happened, he would never miss another one of her birthdays again.
Since it was the first one since all that had happened, Spencer planned something a little extra special. Weeks ahead of time, he talked to Rossi about being able to rent out a bar for the night, Y/N's favorite bar to be exact. Just for themselves. As to be expected, it took a bit of convincing, but eventually they'd been able to successfully rent out the bar for one night, and though Rossi was insistent on paying everything, Spencer wanted to offer as much as he could.
Penelope, of course, insisted on putting up decorations. She roped Luke into helping her, and though he played off like it would be torture, for one thing he was happy to help celebrate his friend's birthday in any way he could, but he also was terrible at hiding the fact that he was more than happy to help Penelope with anything she needed, whether it actually pertained to the party or not.
Everyone told her they were all just going to meet up for drinks after work that day. Y/N was more than okay with it, explaining to them how she was just happy to be able to spend her birthday with her friends no matter where they were. They told her to meet at 7pm when in reality they would all be at the bar an hour and a half early to set up and make sure everything was perfect.
When Y/N actually showed up, Spencer had never seen her so radiant. Even as she was swarmed by Garcia putting on a pink party hat for her that promptly read "Birthday Girl", her hair slightly out of place because of its placement on her head, she was the perfect example of human perfection. She greeted everyone with a huge, beautiful smile accompanied by lots of 'thank you's and 'I love you's, and when she finally got to Spencer, he tried not t hold her to him for too long.
One of the reasons Y/N loved this specific bar was because of the karaoke machine. In fact, drunken karaoke was a decent weekly occurrence with the BAU, and while they'd been no strangers to the act, it only became more frequent when Y/N joined the team. For years now they'd spent many hours singing just as many songs as anyone could think of. And even while drunk, Y/N was a natural. She slipped up on words and slurred them together once in a while, sure, but her voice was easily the most impressive of the bunch, not to mention she never failed to get anyone and everyone to join in.
All that to say Spencer made sure they would be able to use the karaoke machine before they rented out the place. He even attempted to teach himself how to work it, but try as he might, he ended up calling on JJ to help him do it.
Throughout the night they all took turns singing songs, and at one point Y/N finished a song and made a speech, standing up on the bar. (Deep down Spencer was a little nervous that she would hurt herself, or that somehow the owner of the bar would find out that she'd broken one of many rules he had about renting the place out. But that was neither here nor there when he saw the glowing smile she had on her face, looking at all her friends with the most love and admiration he'd seen anyone carry in a while.)
"I'm jussali'l tipsy at the moment, so m'sorry if I don't make any sense," Y/N slurred together, obviously very drunk. Everyone laughed and she continued, clutching the microphone in one hand and placing the other over her heart like she was going to say the Pledge of Allegiance. "I jusneed to say how much I love y'guys. Thank you for celebratin' with me and makin' my birthday real special. I'mean, you fricken rented out a whole-ass bar! That's so nice!"
As she squealed out the last sentence, Spencer couldn't help the wide smile that broke out on his face. She was just so radiant, glowing with warmth and love and happiness and everything good in the world.
She was also struggling to get off the bar. He rushed forward to help her, and she fell forward, into his arms with a giggle.
"You okay?" he asked, his concern blowing away in the wind when she looked into his eyes with another winning smile.
"No thanks t'you," she answered, promptly 'boop'-ing him on the nose before she reached over to the bar and grabbed a full shot glass. After downing the drink, she brushed passed him with a slap on the butt and another giggle, right before she loudly asked Penelope to cut her another slice of cake.
Spencer knew she wouldn't have been so bold had she been sober, but the whole situation still made him feel all warm inside, like he'd taken a shot of whiskey himself.
Luke came up to him, clapping him on the back and snapping him out of it. "This mean you and the birthday girl are finally a thing now?"
"W—what? I don't know what you mean..."
He was obviously lying, and Luke could tell. He laughed a little, nodding towards Y/N, who was currently laughing with Emily and Penelope, a bright blue smudge of frosting on her nose. "She really missed you when you were gone, man. Even put her birthday on hold until she could celebrate with you."
"Well, we've been best friends for years, and she loves her birthday. It was... A hard year. It makes sense."
"Okay, that's fair, but do you know how bad it was? No presents, no birthday wishes, nothing. She demanded we act like it was any other day. And when I brought her a cupcake, she just set it on your desk and left it there. It sat there for about a week before she finally threw it out."
Spencer looked at where she was standing, eating more cake and swaying lightly to the music that was now playing over the speakers. "Really," he mused, not even thinking about it.
Luke sighed beside him. "Look, you can... believe what you want, but we've all noticed it. You two are practically inseparable, and the way I'm seeing you look at her right now tells me everything I need to know."
Even being called out like that, Spencer couldn't make himself look away. And even if he did, he wouldn't have really known what to say. Because all that was running through his mind at the moment was how right Luke was. How much he couldn't help but feel warm and safe when he was in Y/N's presence, and how she made him feel like the only person in the world sometimes.
He wondered then if maybe in the next day or two he should tell her how he felt.
One by one each member of the team eventually left the bar to go home. Each time one of them did, Y/N gave them the biggest hug and mumbled an abundance of 'thank you's and 'I love you's, much like at the start of the night, only this time her words were slurred and higher-pitched and very much laced with alcohol.
The only three people left at the end of the night were her, Spencer, and Emily.
Y/N came up between them and wrapped both her arms around their shoulders, pulling them in for a messy group-hug. "How'r we gonna clean this place up?" she asked dramatically, looking around once they all pulled away.
"I'm going to clean this place up," Emily said, giving Spencer a knowing look. "Since it's your birthday, your best friend here is going to make sure you get home safe and sound."
He definitely didn't see that coming, but somehow he felt like he should have. Regardless, he was more than happy to take the job. Especially when Y/N jumped up and down and threw her arms around him, giving a big old, "Yaaayyyy!" into his neck. She pulled away and gripped his shirt, bouncing on her feet with a large grin. "We can take my car and we can listen t'that CD I was tellin' you about and when we get t'my house we can have a sleepover!"
"Anything you want," he told her with a smile. "Go get your stuff together and we'll go."
As she wandered around the bar to find her shoes that she'd taken off somewhere along the line, Emily nudged Spencer with a smile. "She loves you, you know."
"She's drunk," he countered.
And as if on cue, right then she held one of her shoes up in the air with a triumphant gleam in her eye. "One down!"
"Okay, well, even when she's not drunk, she still loves you."
Though his heart swelled at the thought, he changed the subject. "You don't have to clean everything up. I was going to come back tomorrow morning and do it myself anyway."
"Eh, don't worry, I'm happy to do it." Emily nodded towards Y/N, who was walking around with one shoe on and picking up the other on the floor next to the cake table. "Besides, something tells me you're gonna be a bit preoccupied with hangover duty."
I wouldn't want any other job, he thought to himself.
And even though the nearly-impossible task of getting her into the car should have stressed him out (she kept getting out of the car as Spencer walked around to the driver's side, until finally he promised her a cheeseburger if she would stay), he still wouldn't have had it any other way.
They stopped at McDonald's on the way home, like he promised, and she was practically buzzing with happiness with the food in her lap. She made him sit in the parking lot and wait until she was done eating so she wouldn't spill anything. And in the dim light of the car, parked under a streetlight and watching her eat her food while she rambled on about the most random things, Spencer didn't think he'd ever felt more content.
He tried to keep her quiet as they made their way up the steps to the third floor of her apartment building. They were going to take the elevator but Y/N insisted it would eat her alive, and he quickly agreed to take the stairs as not to make a scene and wake everyone up with her crying. Her shoes came off again on the second flight of stairs, because she kept tripping and then laughing, pretending to fall back and almost scaring him to death.
Now he was unlocking her apartment door with her shoes in his other hand as she clung to his side. As soon as the door was open, she pushed past him and called out for her cat, Murphy. It didn't take long before the white cat jumped up on the counter to meet her, and she squealed and enveloped him in a crushing hug, picking him up and spinning around to meet Spencer, who was closing the door behind him and setting her shoes on the ground.
"Say hi to Murphy! He loves when you come to visit!"
It was true. Though he never really found himself fond of cats, as soon as he visited Y/N's apartment for the first time Murphy clung to him immediately. It didn't take long for the two of them to become as well acquainted as Y/N had been to either of them. Whenever he came over, Spencer liked to think of them as a small little family.
"Hey, Murph," he said, reaching out to pet the cat's head as he wriggled a little under Y/N's strong clutch.
She dropped him after shoving her face in his fur, and wasted no time taking Spencer's hand. "C'mon, I've got some vodka in the cupboard."
As she dragged him further into the kitchen, he squeezed her hand and tried to pull her to him, away from the cupboard. "Y/N, it's almost one in the morning, you need to go to bed."
She turned to face him and whined. "But it's my birthday, you can't make me."
"Well, technically it isn't your birthday anymore since it's past midnight. So, really, I can make you. Come on."
She whined again as he dragged her along to the bedroom. Once they got inside, he sat her down on the bed and reached out to pull off her party hat, which was lopsided and almost placed on her forehead like a unicorn horn. But when he touched the string, she grabbed his hand.
"I wanna leave it on," she said softly.
"It's not safe, you could choke yourself in your sleep," Spencer countered, brushing her hand away and taking the hat off. As his fingers brushed her cheek, she sighed and closed her eyes, a few seconds before letting out a little giggle.
"That tickled," she laughed as he set the hat on her bedside table.
She opened her eyes and smiled at him, and he started to feel all warm again. "Sorry," he whispered, taking the time to memorize the way she looked right then. The curls in her hair had fallen flat, and her makeup was a little smudged, but the lazy smile on her face and the way she blinked up at him with her big, beautiful eyes would always be worth remembering. He could have stayed in that moment forever, just sitting in that comforting silence.
But alas, she was drunk, and unable to be quiet for more than ten seconds.
Y/N lightly poked him in the chest and laughed. "Hey, d'y'think Murphy ever gets tired?"
"I'm sure he does," was all Spencer said, trying to get her to lay down. She did so as she spoke, rambling on about what she thought her cat might have done when she was away at work. But she stopped talking altogether when Spencer tried to put a blanket over her.
"No," was all she said, kicking her legs up.
"You don't want a blanket?"
"No, I want you to be in the blanket with me."
He thought about it for a second before motioning for her to scoot over. "I'll lay with you for a little while, but you have to promise me you'll go to sleep, okay?"
She giggled triumphantly as he laid down beside her and draped the blanket over their legs. "I told'ya a sleepover would be fun."
Spencer reached out and lightly rubbed her arm, knowing that always got her to fall asleep. "I know you did."
But she didn't close her eyes. She was unusually quiet though, just silently staring at his face before she sharply pulled her arm away. "You're tickling me again."
"I thought you liked when I rub your arm, it helps you sleep," is all he said.
Y/N grabbed his hand and pulled it up to lay between them on the pillow, separating their faces. She placed it palm up and rolled up his sleeves so she could rub his forearm, too. Her touches weren't as light, but she giggled all the same. "Am I tickling you?"
He wanted to tell her the truth, which was that she was not tickling him, and it actually felt really nice. But because it might make her feel better, he lied, and told her, "Yes."
"Good," she laughed, moving her hand faster. Now she was just tracing his forearm with her middle finger like she might rub out a stain on the carpet, and Spencer tried to wiggle his arm away.
"Y/N..."
He didn't say it to be mean or irritated, in fact his voice was level and soothing as not to alarm her at all, but all the same she gasped and immediately pulled her hand away. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry! Did I hurt you?"
"No," he reassured, moving a little closer to her. "You didn't hurt me, I'm ok—"
"Let me kiss it and make it feel better," she continued, ignoring him completely. Before he could stop her, she grabbed his arm and brought it to her mouth, pressing gentle lips to the crease of his elbow trough the fabric of his shirt, then moving the tiny kisses along up his arm until she made it to his wrist. She didn't stop there, continuing to kiss the palm of his hand and even along his fingers, right until she reached his fingertips.
He laid there, completely still and mesmerized as she flipped his arm over and worked her way down again, kissing the backside of his hand and keeping her lips pressed to his wrist for approximately four seconds. Then she flipped his arm over again and kissed the palm of his hand once more, repeating her many kisses until she got to his middle finger.
He should have seen it coming.
He was so caught up in the feeling of her lips pressed against his skin that it completely slipped his mind that she was still drunk. So when she wrapped her lips around his middle finger and sucked it into her mouth with a laugh, he pulled his arm away and sighed.
She actually cackled with laughter, slightly flailing her legs under the blanket. "Gotcha!"
"Ha-ha," Spencer deadpanned, wiping his finger on his shirt.
He wasn't really sure what to say once her laughter died down, but once he opened his mouth to suggest they try sleeping, she spoke first.
"Can I have a glass of water?"
He studied her for a moment. "You're not going to try anything funny, are you?"
She laughed, leaning forward and brushing her nose against his for the briefest of seconds before retreating and looking him in the eye. "I wouldn't dream of it."
There was no way he could say no. "Alright. I'll be back in a second."
Spencer got out of the bed and turned to leave, but she leaned forward and grabbed his hand. "Wait! I have to tell you a secret first."
If he stayed and listened to what she had to say, it was probably dangerous territory, because in the movies this was always the moment where there were drunken confessions of things you never wanted to say out loud, right? And he didn't want to do that to her, but realistically she was probably going to say something ridiculous about Murphy. Right?
Nonetheless, Spencer turned around and looked down at Y/N. "What is it?"
She pulled his hand, scooting closer to the edge of the bed. "Come closer. It's a secret."
He leaned down, but she pulled him again. "Closer!"
Finally, he made his way down to her face, turning his head so she could whisper in his ear.
But she didn't. Instead he felt her press a kiss to his cheek, emphasized with a loud smooch-ing sound when she pulled away. He looked down at her to see the biggest smile on her face.
"S'all I wanted to say. You can go now."
He smiled back at her before nodding and leaving the room, his cheek and arm practically burning from where she'd kissed them.
And when he came back with her water, she was fast asleep.
***
More than anything she just wanted the banging to stop. But once she realized it was in her head, and it was there because she'd been drinking all night, her irritability was even worse.
"Fuck," Y/N grumbled as she struggled to open her eyes. When she did open them she found Murphy curled into a ball at the foot of her bed, his white fur a stark contrast to the deep maroon color of her comforter.
The next thing she noticed was the smell of something... burning? But there wasn't any sound to be heard other than the beating of her head, so she had to wonder if maybe somewhere outside there had been some kind of fire. Or maybe she was just imagining it.
She wasn't going to investigate, but then she heard her front door open, and despite the pounding in her head, Y/N sat up straight, almost scared out of her mind. Instinctively she reached beside her, knocking over a pink party hat in the process, and grabbing the baseball bat she kept there in between her bed and the table.
As quietly as she could, Y/N crept through the bedroom until she reached the door, pressing her ear against it to hear anything more. She heard plastic bags rustling around, and though that was fairly innocent in terms of menacing sounds, it still didn't quell the feeling that punched her in the pit of her stomach. Though, to be fair, she was certain a lot of that had to do with the copious amounts of whiskey and other liquor she drank the night before.
She took a deep breath before slowly swinging the door open and taking a few quiet steps into the hallway, just before she had to turn the corner to get into the kitchen. The noise got louder as she approached, and after taking another slow, deep breath, Y/N jumped out and held her bat out in front of her.
"FBI! What Are you doing in my house?"
"Holy shit!"
Spencer was standing in her smoky kitchen, clutching his hand to his chest. "Y/N, it's just me! Put the bat down!"
It clattered to the ground as she sighed out and shook her head. "What the hell, man, you scared the shit out of me!"
"Right back at you! I was just bringing you some breakfast..."
Y/N surveyed the kitchen and found that, sure enough, there were what looked like wrapped sandwiches on the counter. "Why is it all... burn-y in here? What happened?"
Spencer looked around nervously, his hands fumbling at his sides. "I, uh... tried to make you French toast. I know it's your favorite, and I know that greasy food is supposed to help with hangovers, so I tried to make some bacon, too, but it turns out that I really suck at multi-tasking in the kitchen, and I burned it all... So, I went with gas-station breakfast, which I figured was the next best thing."
The way he spoke reminded Y/N of a little kid who got caught doing something they weren't supposed to. He was extremely apologetic, almost in a way that made her think he thought she'd yell at him.
Now she remembered just a little of what happened the night before. She remembered drinking a lot and then Spencer taking her home, but she was so tired and out of it that all the little details weren't clear. Or present at all, really. All she knew when she looked at him in her kitchen right then, was that she'd never been more happy to see anyone while hungover. Especially since that someone happened to be her best friend and brought her breakfast.
She smiled and walked over to him. "That was really sweet of you, thank you."
Spencer looked down at her and smiled. "Sorry about scaring you."
"Eh, don't be. It was a good wake-up call," she laughed. "What would I do without you?"
He reached his hand out and brushed some of the hair from her face, at which she almost melted. "I think I should be asking you that question."
Something came to her mind just then, and she wasn't sure why. But she took the risk anyway, turning her head and kissing the inside of his palm.
"W—what was that for?"
Y/N shrugged. "I don't know. Just felt right."
She didn't know how long they stood there, smiling at each other, but it felt different, like suddenly the air around them had shifted overnight into something palpably electric. And it's that energy that urged her to say something she'd been afraid to say for so long.
"Hey, I uh... I don't know if this is weird timing, and you can say no even though it was my birthday yesterday, don't feel pressured to say yes, but I—"
"Yes."
Y/N raised an eyebrow. "You don't even know what I was going to say."
"I don't care," Spencer said simply. "Whatever it is you want, it's yours."
"So, if... If I asked you to dinner tonight—"
"Yes."
Her stomach churned, but this time it had nothing to do with the hangover. The pounding in her head was more of a dull thrum now because the pounding in her heart overpowered it. And it grew even more intense when her best friend took a step closer, placing his hand to the side of her face.
"I wouldn't kiss me right now if I were you," she warned, tilting her head to the side. "Hangover breath is basically a bio-hazard, and you're going to completely rethink going out with me."
Spencer shook his head and leaned in even closer. "I don't care."
As he kissed her, she lost herself in him completely and came to the conclusion that he was the only hangover cure she would ever need.
***
PERMANENT TAGLIST: @elldell1204 @muffin-cup @calm-and-doctor @slutforthegubes
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mcmoth · 3 years ago
Text
Dream SMP fandom etiquette
So. This post is probably too little, too late, considering the fandom and the issues I'm about to talk about have existed for so long now, and a lot of the people who need to hear this probably aren't on tumblr anyways, but I just wanted to dedicate a quick post to talk about fandom etiquette. Mostly pertaining to discourse, and interactions with people outside of our circle. These are just going to be my own personal thoughts, of course, but I felt it could be good to bring some of this to attention. So without further introduction:
Where to (not) talk about discourse:
Don't go into other streamer's vods to only focus about a different character. If you want to analyse, for example, c!Techno, do it in Techno's stream. Don't go into unrelated streams, like Tommy's, Tubbo's etc. to do it, even if they were a part of the event in question. This is, of course, with the exception if the character in question didn't stream their own pov. But otherwise, stay in your own space. This is to prevent cluttering a streamer's comments about unrelated discussion. To give further example: Tubbo's vod comments should primarily focus on Tubbo's character. Not Tommy's, Ranboo's, Techno's or whoever else's.
Don't start discourse in the comments of animatics. Seriously, stop that. Animatics aren't discussion boards. The comments are there to analyse and appreciate the video presented, not argue. It's especially rude if you pick a small detail, that wasn't even the focus of the animatic, or even a completely unrelated issue to rant out your frustrations about. To give examples: starting disc discourse in an animatic of Tommy talking to Wilbur, or rambling about how tragic Techno's character is in an animatic focused on clingy duo, etc.
This applies to fan songs as well.
Video essays are the exception to these rules. I think it's safe to say they're the place to bring your hot takes, if you really feel so inclined to argue in youtube comment sections (Though I'd personally advise to still keep the topic relevant).
Keep negativity out of fanfic comments. This isn't nearly as big of an issue as the last points, but I've seen it happen a couple times, so I'm deciding to mention it. Fanfics are written for fun. Even if you disagree with the characterisation or something else, unless the author is clear in accepting critique, keep criticism to yourself. And definitely don't rant about how you dislike a character unrelated to the fanfic. Sharing your thoughts on the fanfic itself is of course fine and welcomed, but when it turns from discussing the author's story to talking about how you dislike a character in canon, that's when it crosses a line. Example: comment talking about what you don't like about c!Tommy on a Bench Trio fanfiction.
When commenting on art, keep the feedback positive. Even if you dislike any presented character, keep that to yourself. Example: Don't say things like "I hate x character, but this art is good". You might think the author would feel honoured, but it's actually just hurtful.
How to deal with discourse:
This is gonna be a shorter section, because I think we all chose to do it in different ways, and that's valid. Also, it's just that I, myself, am still learning how to do this well, but I thought it could be good to try to lay it out anyways.
Try to scroll past takes you disagree with instead of arguing if you don't think you'd be able to keep your cool. Noone likes a random person yelling at them through a screen, and if you rant, you'll get an equally frustrated reply back, and noone will be happy. Either explain your point in a calm manner, or scroll past/ unfollow/block.
On the keeping cool thing, remember to just step away. Take a deep breath and calm yourself down before proceeding. To minimize the frustration you feel on a daily basis, filter tags, block people, avoid videos and youtube comment sections that you know will upset you, and leave certain internet spaces if you find yourself unable to escape negativity even with all those steps. Remember: in the end, it's all a game played by friends, a story, and your enjoyment of it lies in what you take from it. Abandon what makes you unhappy. Marie Kondo your fandom experience.
Also, here's your reminder, to whom this is relevant, to take care of yourself. Hydrate, eat, sleep, clean up, get fresh air, remember the things outside of all this. There's plenty to do outside of this fandom, and what you can do here can wait. There is no pressure, or obligation. Not for the content you create, not for the discussions you bring, not for responding to discourse, not for anything. Fandom is meant purely for fun, so take care <3
Interacting with people outside of the fandom:
This is something that I've seen a bit of talk about, and I thought I'd drop in my own thoughts on this as well. No matter the differences, we're all just trying to vibe, and I think these are important things to keep in mind to leave both sides better off:
Don't interact with hate posts. Just don't. You don't want to see them, they don't want to see you. Even if your response is lighthearted, their animosity is not. They will feel frustrated regardless, and the grudge will only grow. And if they're being agressive, calm discussion most likely won't happen even if you're being polite. Just leave it, please.
Correct misinformation calmly. I completely get how it can be frustrating to see blatant lies and all, but with our reputation, people will not listen if you're being antagonistic. Provide sources, explain, and leave it at that.
Don't be hateful, send death threats, or assume privilege or whatever else. That's stepping into the same shoes of the people you hate. Misunderstandings go both ways, and the fact of the matter is, I think most people who dislike DSMP, even the ones who are agressive about it, don't have their stance rooted in maliciousness. To expand on why the situation became what it is today, taken from a discussion on discord:
I think it's just a combination of Dream growing so insanely quickly + how internet spaces have changed over the years. When ccs like jackstepticeye or pewdiepie etc. grew popular, activism wasn't as prevalent and held to such importance. Now it's thankfully more talked about, but that also leads to Dream being more scrutinized in comparision. Add twitter trends and the general prevalence of the fandom, and you've got everyone feeling tired and frustrated and paranoid. People also tend not to fact check stuff, especially when it comes to celebrities and stuff they're not really interested in, so rumors spread fast.
And actually, I think there's absolutely valid reasons to be made uncomfortable by Dream SMP, either in it's creators, content or fandom, and there is, of course, stuff to criticise in general. The problem is the hate and misinformation and overexposure, but we are not going to solve any of that by being aggressive in return.
(This is, by the way, not talking about more serious cases. Like doxxing, or leaving gore images in hashtags, or similar instances. That's a whole different complicated issue that I don't feel qualified to tackle.)
And finally, don't overwhelm outsiders who merely mention the Dream SMP. Don't send asks asking them to watch it, don't write paragraphs explaining the lore, don't confuse them with inside jokes, just... Don't jump on people like that. Unless they're explicitly clear in wanting interaction and getting into the fandom, that kind of thing will just drive them away. This is in no way exclusive to the Dream SMP fandom, pretty much every fandom has people enthiastic to have more people involved, but since there are so unbelievably many of us, it's especially easy to go overboard with this stuff. Just... be polite, and don't pressure anyone. Be nice, please.
So.... ya! This would be it for this one, I think. Sorry that it's kinda long, thank you if you read it at all. Hope y'all have pleasant days ^^
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timelesslords · 3 years ago
Note
prompts: could you write an in canon verse (so like gods and stuff are real) fic with amnesia? it could be post TLO or it could be one of them coming out of anesthesia and feeling wonky. i just love a good memory loss fic.
@halfbloodcarrie was instrumental in making this happen!!! Her adorable fluffy idea was completely paid dust in favor of making this angsty as hell but I blame her for me getting it done at all <3
read on AO3
Everything was dark. And everything hurt. His head especially was throbbing, but he couldn’t make out any other feeling. He could hear something; vague at first, just a ringing. But if he struggled, and he did, he could start to make out faint voices. His eyes refused to open, they wouldn’t even blink, but the noises were getting clearer by the second.
“What if he doesn’t wake up?” a worried voice asked. Something about it felt familiar, but he couldn’t even pry his eyes open, much less figure out who it belonged to.
“He’ll wake up,” a second voice said, male this time. He sounded confident, assured. At least he thought so.
“There was so much blood, I thought… gods.”
The first voice again, though this time it wavered. It sounded scared, terrified even.
“He’ll be alright, Annabeth. He’s got a thick skull.”
That made the first voice laugh, watery as it was.
“Don’t I know it.”
Some feeling was starting to return to his limbs, slowly but surely. He tried blinking again, but it felt sluggish, slow. Suddenly he realized he could feel his arms and fingers, and there was a hand in his, gripping it so tightly it was a wonder he hadn’t felt it before.
“Percy?” the female voice asked, hopeful. He groaned. His head was pounding like nothing he’d ever felt before. Actually, he wasn’t sure if that was true, because he couldn’t remember his head pounding before, ever.
Come to think of it, he couldn’t remember anything at all.
He blinked again, this time managing to pry his eyelids open a fraction of a degree. The light streaming in hurt like a bitch, and he groaned again, closing his eyes.
“Percy,” the first voice said again, more frantically, “Can you hear me?”
She seemed to be talking to him, though he wasn’t quite sure. He couldn’t remember his name, but she’d said Percy twice, so that had to be it, didn’t it?
He tried to say something to the girl, but it came out as a strangled groan of pain.
“Will,” she said, a little desperately.
“He’s maxed out, Annabeth, I’m sorry,” the other voice said.
The girl (Annabeth?) muttered something under her breath in-- was that Greek? And how did he know that? More determined than ever, Percy blinked again, this time managing to crack his eyelids open and keep them that way.
His vision was blurry, but a few more blinks and the vague shapes in front of him started to sharpen into focus.
“Percy?” the girl said again. Percy squinted, trying to focus on her.
The first thing he noticed was that she was-- well, pretty didn’t quite describe it. She was seriously beautiful. Her eyes were a dark grey color, currently wide with concern, her hair framing her face in cascades of golden curls. Her nose was small and button shaped, dotted with freckles.
Even if Percy didn’t currently feel like a small blacksmith’s forge was hammering on the inside of his skull, he was pretty sure he would’ve been rendered pretty speechless.
“Hey there, sleepyhead. You were out for a while,” she said, smiling. She did look relieved, but Percy didn’t miss the genuine worry behind her eyes either, the little waver along her lips trying to maintain an upbeat expression.
“I… what’s going on?” Percy asked. Annabeth bit her lip, looking over her shoulder. Percy glanced upwards, properly seeing the other person in the room for the first time. He was a teenager, with shaggy blonde hair a shade or two lighter than the girl’s. He was wearing a white lab coat over what looked to be an orange t-shirt and jeans, which didn’t exactly instill Percy with a lot of confidence in whatever medical care he was receiving.
Of course, the fact that he had no memory didn’t help matters.
“You sort of got hit in the head,” Annabeth said, wincing as she did.
“Really hard,” the boy added.
Percy reached up tentatively, to the place where it felt like his skull was splitting inside out. Instead of skin he felt something else, some thick sort of fabric.
“Ow,” he said, a little unhelpfully. The girl smiled again-- crap, how was she even more beautiful when she smiled?-- but it still had an edge of sadness to it.
“Yeah. Discus accident,” she said.
“Discus accident?” Percy asked, confused.
“Yeah. Those stone frisbee things, remember?” the other guy said.
“No,” Percy said, pushing himself into a sitting position. It made his head throb, but he couldn’t stand lying down anymore. “I don’t-- I don’t remember anything.”
“You mean-- you mean you don’t remember the accident,” Annabeth said, a little forcefully. Her grey eyes flashed, and Percy didn’t quite recognize the expression, but something in his gut told him it was not good.
“No, I mean I don’t remember anything,” Percy repeated, figuring it was best to get it out of the way sooner or later, “I don’t know where I am or who you are or who I am.”
The girl took one very long look at him. He didn’t know what exactly he had said in particular that had triggered something in her, but the concern fell from her face in an instant. She dropped his hand, something sharp overtaking her expression.
“You’re such an ass sometimes,” she said. Her voice was a little thick, but Percy couldn’t tell if she was crying, because in the next second she stood and stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind her. Inadvertently, Percy felt a twinge of something sad in his chest, though he couldn’t quite place why. He didn’t know Annabeth, but she clearly seemed to know him, and what he’d said had clearly set her off.
All of this was really not improving his headache, which had resumed its throbbing with reckless abandon.
“I didn’t mean to…” Percy trailed off. To what? Upset her? Make her run away? But all he’d done was tell the honest truth-- he couldn’t remember shit. The guy was giving him a look that was bordering on disgust.
“Dude, that’s really not funny,” he said. He sounded pissed, though if Percy wasn’t entirely mistaken, there was a hint of fear behind his bright blue eyes.
“I’m not trying to be funny, I literally don’t know what’s going on,” Percy said, starting to feel a little frantic. Why was everyone here acting like they knew him? And why did he not even know him? He felt nerves and something else tugging in his gut, an insistent, terrifying pull--
Without warning, the glass next to his bed shattered, spraying water and glass everywhere. Percy flinched away from the table, whirling around to look at the boy. His eyes were wide and surprised.
“What the fuck was that?” Percy asked, alarmed.
“That was… you,” the boy said, staring at Percy like he had just grown a second head, “Styx, you’re not making this up, are you?”
“How many times do I have to tell you that I don’t know what’s going on for you to believe me?” Percy said, still staring wide-eyed at the place where the cup had shattered. For his own sanity, he decided to ignore the boy’s declaration that he had caused it.
“Four, apparently,” the boy said, rubbing his forehead like he could feel a headache coming on, “Unless you want to make it five for good measure?”
“I have absolutely no memory,” Percy repeated.
“Great. This is just-- this is awesome,” the boy said, sighing heavily.
“Yeah, I’m having so much fun over here,” Percy said dryly.
“Right, sorry,” the boy said, wincing, “Your name is Percy.”
So Percy had guessed that correctly. Good to know.
“My name is Will,” the boy continued, oblivious to Percy’s thoughts, “The girl was--”
“Annabeth,” Percy finished. Will perked up, hopeful, but Percy shook his head.
“I heard you say her name,” Percy explained. Will deflated.
“Oh, right,” he said. He sounded inordinately disappointed, way more disappointed than he’d been when Percy hadn’t remembered him.
“How exactly did this happen?” Percy asked, doing his best not to rub his forehead again. Will sighed.
“Some newbies were messing around with the discuses on the strawberry fields-- which is stupidly dangerous, by the way, we have an arena for a reason-- but it went a little off course and almost hit Annabeth in the face. You shoved her out of the way but it clipped your forehead pretty good.”
Percy tried to process all that, piece by piece. He didn’t know what a newbie was, and apparently wherever this place was had strawberry fields that he and Annabeth had been in together? But the strangest thing of all was that Percy didn’t feel at all surprised that he’d gotten injured trying to get Annabeth out of the way. That piece felt strangely right to him, even if everything else was messy and confusing.
“So me and Annabeth are friends, then?” he asked. Will gave him a strange look, his face paling slightly.
“You guys… you’re close. Really close.”
Percy nodded. That made sense. He didn’t know why Will was being weird about it, but he believed him regardless.
“She was mad at me,” Percy noted. At this, Will winced.
“Yeah. Memory loss… it's kind of a sore subject for her.”
“Why?” Percy asked. Maybe it was a little invasive, but this was all stuff he was supposed to know anyway, wasn’t it?
Will sighed, rubbing his face in his hands.
“Gods, I’m so not the person to be explaining this to you,” he said, “But a few years ago you sort of… disappeared. And you lost all your memories. Except you remembered her. But it was really, really tough on her, she had no idea if you were gonna know anything or not when she found you.”
Percy blinked, trying to take all that in. He had a feeling that was the hyper-condensed version of what had gone down, but it explained the situation well enough. Annabeth hadn’t considered the fact that he genuinely wouldn’t remember her, so she’d assumed it was a bad joke. Percy wished it was a bad joke, because he would give absolutely anything to remember more about her.
“Got it,” Percy said, trying not to frown, “So how did I get my memories back last time? Can we do that again?”
Will grimaced.
“I think last time you drank gorgon’s blood, but we’re fresh out of that.”
Percy stared at him, unsure if he was joking or not. He looked serious, but Percy didn’t want to press it. Clearly last time had been a different sort of deal.
“So what do we do? I can’t go around like this forever.”
“Well, hopefully it's just temporary. Your head injury, plus the mortal pain meds we gave you, plus the nectar--”
“The what?” Percy asked.
“Don’t worry about it,” Will said, a little hurriedly. “The point is, your brain is processing a lot of stuff right now. My best guess is that it overloaded a bit, and the amnesia is a side effect. If that’s the case it should go away on its own eventually.”
“And if it’s not the case?” Percy asked, dreading the answer a little. As predicted, WIll grimaced again.
“It could be from the initial injury. In which case it would be… more permanent.”
Percy’s mouth went a little dry.
“Goodie.”
“It probably isn’t,” Will said, though he didn’t sound entirely convinced.
“So what do we do?” Percy asked again.
“You could try going to sleep. It might give your brain a chance to readjust, chill out a little. Or…”
Will trailed off, clearly unwilling to finish his thought.
“Or?” Percy prompted.
“Or we could try to jog your memory with stuff you might remember,” Will finished. Percy didn’t understand why this option seemed to be so unpleasant to Will, since it made the most sense to him. He felt disoriented as hell, and he was pretty sure he wasn’t going to be able to calm his mind down enough to sleep anytime soon. Plus, he was pretty sure he’d been unconscious for a good long while.
“How long was I asleep just now?” Percy asked.
“A while,” Will admitted.
“So let’s try the other thing.”
Will swallowed heavily, his fingers gripping the sides of his white coat a little too tightly.
“Yeah. Okay,” he said, still not sounding happy about it at all, “I’ll-- ugh. Don’t move, I’ll be right back.”
Percy did not move, mostly because he didn’t think he could get up from his bed if he tried. Being alone gave him the chance to observe the room he was in a little bit. It was small but clean, sort of a cross between a normal bedroom and a hospital unit. The walls were made of old looking hardwood, and if he craned his head back a little bit he could almost see out the window. It looked green out there, but it was kind of hard to tell.
Nothing about this place felt familiar, but that didn’t mean much, given nothing Percy had experienced since waking up felt familiar.
Nothing except for those few flashes of feeling he’d gotten about Annabeth, anyway.
Will was gone for a long time, a lot longer than Percy had been expecting. He couldn’t tell time very well and he didn’t see a clock anywhere, but it felt like Will had to have been gone at least half an hour, maybe more. Just when Percy was about to give up and try taking a nap, the door opened again. Will was there, but this time Annabeth was in tow too.
Percy tried not to read too hard into the fact that she didn’t look happy to be there. If he wasn’t mistaken, her eyes were puffy and red from crying, though now they were narrowed in barely constrained anger, her arms folded over her chest.
Will, for his part, looked extremely nervous. That didn’t give Percy a lot of hope about how this was going to go.
“It would probably work better if you could get up and walk around, but well…” he trailed off, but Percy knew exactly why that wasn’t possible. Just keeping his eyes open had been a struggle, and he was pretty sure if he tried to stand right now he was gonna black out.
“Yeah, sounds like a bad idea,” he agreed. Annabeth said nothing, just kept staring with her jaw clenched tight.
“I figured-- you know, you remembered Annabeth last time,” Will said, still sounding nervous, “And you guys have known each other for years, so if anything is going to jog your memory… well.”
“Okay,” Percy said, easily.
Annabeth remained silent.
“I’ll leave you guys alone,” Will said, looking like he absolutely couldn’t wait to get out of the room. He did a second later, slipping out the door and shutting it behind him.
Annabeth looked extraordinarily unhappy to be there. Any care that she had displayed for him when he first woke up was apparently gone. She said nothing as she looked at him with nothing but ice in her eyes.
He didn’t know why exactly she was so pissed-- it wasn’t his fault he couldn’t remember anything, and wouldn’t it be worse for him anyway? But she didn’t seem keen on speaking to him anytime soon, and Percy figured it was up to him to break the ice.
“So, um. Are you single?” Percy asked. It was dumb, sure, but he didn’t remember shit, and this girl was pretty and she seemed to care about him and well? Might as well shoot his shot.
Annabeth muttered something under her breath, something that sounded suspiciously like I’m going to kill you. Cool. Definitely did not make her hotter to him, not even a little bit.
“I’m not single,” she said, practically glaring at him.
“Got it. Sorry,” Percy said. For just a second her eyes ducked away, sadness replacing anger. But then she looked back up, and her previous expression was reinstated.
“Why don’t we just stick to you,” she said.
“Sure,” Percy said. He didn't want to make her mad again, because he had a feeling if that kept happening it would not end well for him. He wasn’t sure what could be worse than complete and total amnesia, but looking at Annabeth he was pretty sure she could think of something.
She took a deep breath, a little unsteadily.
“Your name is Percy,” she said, “I guess Will already told you that, though.”
Percy nodded. She moistened her lips, staring down at the ground.
“Okay. What else do you want to know?”
“Where are we?” Percy asked. It wasn’t his most urgent question, but it felt like a safer one to ask. Then again, from the look on Annabeth’s face, maybe that was a miscalculation. She was biting her lip, the anger in her expression softening slightly. It seemed to be replaced by something sad though, and Percy found he almost preferred the anger.
“It’s… a little hard to explain. But we’re at a camp. A summer camp. It’s-- it’s where we met.”
“Why are we here now?” Percy asked. Annabeth shrugged.
“We’re just visiting,” she said.
“Together?” Percy asked. She stared at him, swallowing heavily.
“Yeah. Together,” she said, though she was clearly unwilling to elaborate.
Okay then. Time for a new line of questioning. A safer line, one that hopefully wouldn’t put her on the verge of tears.
“What’s my favorite color?” he asked.
“Blue,” she said, instantly.
“Favorite food?”
“Anything blue,” she said, just as fast.
“I eat blue food?” Percy asked, confused. She smiled for the first time since he’d told her his memory was gone. It was small, but it still made his heart flutter.
“Yeah. It’s sort of an inside joke with you and your mom,” she said. The smile faded just as fast as it had come, but her answer had inadvertently given Percy more information than he’d expected.
“So I’m close to my mom?” Percy asked, unable to help it. Annabeth nodded again. She took a tentative step forward, sitting back down on the chair beside his bed.
“Who else?” he asked, without thinking. Annabeth frowned, a little confused.
“What do you mean?” she asked.
“I mean--” Percy started, realizing this might be a little too much too soon, but wanting to know so badly he couldn’t help but ask anyway, “I mean, who else am I close to?”
Annabeth didn’t answer for a long minute. She was looking down at the ground again, her hands gripping her own shoulders, arms shielding her chest. She seemed to be contemplating something, though what it was, Percy wasn’t sure.
Maybe he shouldn’t have asked that question. Maybe it was too personal-- with a start Percy realized that Annabeth was probably a pretty high priority for him, given the scant details he knew about their relationship, and him not knowing that intrinsically had to hurt.
“I’m sorry,” he said, “Just forget it, tell me something else.”
She finally looked back up at him, though she still seemed upset and unsure.
“No, it’s fine,” she said, though she was clearly forcing her voice not to waver, “Like I said, you’re close to your mom, her name is Sally. You have a sister named Estelle and a brother named Tyson. And your best friend is--” she stumbled, but found herself again, “His name is Grover.”
Percy noticed that Annabeth’s own name was conspicuously absent from that list. Maybe he should keep his mouth shut, all things considered, but his curiosity got the best of him. He wanted to know this more than anything.
“What about you?” he asked, voice quiet.
It took her less time to answer than he expected, but she was still quiet for a minute.
“You asked me if I was single,” she said finally, eyes ducked down, a rosy blush growing in her cheeks, “And I said no because-- because we’re dating. We have been for a while.”
“Oh,” Percy said. He could feel his own face getting red, even though this was kind of great news-- or maybe not so great news, considering his stupid brain still couldn’t remember shit. But it still felt right, like a puzzle piece slotting into place. Of course he was dating her. That was just correct, an inalienable fact he felt dumb for not knowing, despite not knowing anything at all.
“Yeah,” she said, “But you don’t remember, so… so I don’t know anymore, I guess.”
“I’m sorry,” Percy said, and he felt it. He felt like an idiot, both for trying to flirt with her earlier, and for not putting the pieces together sooner. The hand holding probably should have given it away, at the very least.
To his surprise, Annabeth gave him a small smile, even though her eyes were a little red. She wiped them on her sleeve, clearly trying not to do it in an obvious way.
“Sorry, it’s just-- that’s so you,” she said, sniffling a little.
“What’s so me?” Percy asked. He felt stupid, oblivious, but she just smiled again, a touch wider this time.
“Apologizing for something that isn’t even your fault.”
“I really am sorry,” Percy said, and he felt worse with every word, “I want to remember, I do, it’s just-- all of it’s gone.”
“I know,” she said. She sounded defeated. “I guess it would be too much to ask for you to remember me twice, huh?”
She said it like a joke, but Percy could feel the real pain behind her words. He felt an ache in his chest, like a phantom pain he couldn’t quite place, something in him mirroring her own hurt. He wanted so badly to comfort her, but he didn’t know how.
Or maybe he did. His brain was a jumbled mess, but he did know the only things that had made him feel anything since he’d woken up had to do with her.
“I… I almost get flashes,” he admitted, glancing up at her again. She wasn’t quite meeting his eye, looking somewhere over his shoulder, but he continued anyway. “When you say or do things… It’s like my body knows what to feel but my mind doesn’t know why.”
She glanced up, her eyes finally meeting his own. They were still shining with tears, though not as intensely as before.
“Like how?” she asked, simply. Percy swallowed heavily, not exactly sure what to say. It was hard to describe, given he’d barely recognized his own feelings.
“Like… like when you left, before. I was upset but I didn’t know why. I didn’t know you but I knew… I knew that was supposed to hurt, somehow. And when Will told me about how I got hurt in the first place, how I was trying to keep the frisbee thing from hitting you-- that felt right, but I don’t know why.”
She had graduated to crying in earnest now, tears slipping out of the corner of her eyes and falling down her cheeks. Percy felt the inexplicable urge to reach out and brush them away, but he knew he couldn’t. And that hurt too for some reason, a hollow aching in his chest he couldn’t quite place even though the reason for it was standing right in front of him.
“And right now,” Percy continued, even though maybe he shouldn’t, “You’re upset and I just feel this urge to do something, and I can’t because I don’t know how.”
“Percy, please--” she said, still crying, her voice rough with tears. He didn’t know what she was begging for, but he couldn’t help his next words slipping out, like his tongue knew more what to do than his mind.
“I don’t know anything about me, but I know-- I know I love you. I can feel it. I’m not just saying it either, I swear I can feel it.”
“Percy,” she said again, her voice barely above a whisper this time.
“You have to help me, Annabeth. I don’t know what to do,” he said, and this time it was his turn for his voice to get thick, a lump in his throat obscuring his words.
“I--” she started, swallowing heavily, eyes welling with tears again, “I don’t know what to do.”
“Yes you do,” Percy said, and he was sure she did, something in him just knew, “You always do, don’t you?”
That felt right too, even if he couldn’t place why, but it seemed to mean more to her than to him. She stared at him, eyes wide and scared. She was so close now, close enough that he could see every freckle on her nose.
Annabeth looked so panicked that for a second a second, Percy thought she was going to hit him, but then she did the opposite. She leaned over and kissed him.
Her lips were soft and sweet, and she tasted like strawberries and salt. His lips seemed to know exactly what to do, moving against hers like they’d kiss her a thousand times-- and maybe they had. His hand moved, almost of its own accord to her hair, tangling in it, pulling her a fraction of an inch closer--
And then it hit him. The scent of her shampoo, lemony and sharp and familiar.
He gasped, not meaning to, but she pulled back, grey eyes wide.
“Percy?” she asked, hopeful even as she tried to hide it.
“Annabeth,” he said, trying not to panic as things started to float through his mind-- more than things, memories. Her face and her voice and her words, the feeling of her hand in his and her smile against his lips, it all started to flood back like it had never left.
“Are you--” she asked, her hands on his shoulders, gripping tight, too tight, but he didn’t even care.
“Annabeth,” he breathed, saying her name like a revelation, because it was, “You’re Annabeth Chase, you’re my girlfriend and an architect and you’re scared to death of spiders and you still sleep with a teddy bear--”
She cut him off at that last point, throwing her arms around him and hugging him harder than she ever had-- except for maybe that time she’d thought he was dead for two weeks and he’d crashed his own funeral. Percy hugged her back just as hard, because he actually remembered that.
It hadn’t all come back-- things were blurry, most things, actually. But Annabeth at least felt clear in his mind, a shining beacon welcoming the rest of his memories back. He was already starting to get a headache again, but he didn’t care. They would come back. And even if they didn’t-- he had her. That was enough.
She pulled back from her bone crushing embrace, keeping their faces so close their noses were almost touching. She seemed scared that if she pulled away he might too, even though he had no intention of doing so, physically or mentally.
“So you’re back? Really?” she asked, sounding scared to know the answer.
“Sort of,” Percy confirmed, wincing as he did. He really was starting to get a pounding headache. “I remember you. And bits and pieces of other things, but mostly you.”
Annabeth breathed a sigh of relief, closing her eyes for a long moment.
“You scared the shit out of me,” she whispered, her hands trailing up his neck, just barely scraping his hair.
“I know. I’m sorry,” he breathed. And he did know, now better than ever. It couldn’t have been more than a few hours since he’d woken up without his memory, but he knew every minute of it had to have been hell for her.
Annabeth sighed, pulling back further, so he could see her whole face. Her eyes were still red from crying, and her cheeks were still flushed from their kiss. But he could see the barest traces of humor in her expression, a slight tug at the corner of her mouth where a smile was being repressed.
“What?” he asked, but she just shook her head.
“It’s nothing,” she said, but her smile had grown.
“Come on, I just had amnesia. You have to tell me.”
She laughed, a light tinkling sound. It was just on the edge of being hysterical, but she deserved it, after the day she’d been having.
“Fine. I was just thinking-- Hera couldn’t make you forget me but a glorified frisbee could?” Annabeth said.
“Hey, it was heavy!” Percy protested, but he couldn’t help but grin as he did. He would probably stay grinning for the rest of his life, actually.
“You’re such an idiot,” she breathed, pulling him into a hug again, “I love you so much.”
“I love you too,” Percy said, hugging her back. And now he knew he did, in a permanent, tangible way.
There was still a lot missing, but he had the most important bits down. His name was Percy Jackson. He was twenty years old, and in college and a demigod, and lots of other things that would surely return with time.
And he loved Annabeth Chase more than anything in the world.
96 notes · View notes